#I don't know what to do anymore

[just-slightly-chayotic]

the reviews on my response to jeff's new song are out:

via @fuckyeah-itme

#i'm never going to be the same #this song has broken me #i don't know what to do anymore #jeff satur #tea's ramblings

[commentgoblin]

super bowl bombing of Rafah

How am I to sleep tonight Knowing in the morning I will have to read The death counts of strangers on the other side of the world Strangers with names I will not know And families I cannot comfort And homes that are destroyed forever

How am I to sleep tonight Knowing that while my eyes are closed Children will be bombed Or shot Buried alive Or burned

How are we to move on from this? How have we ever moved on from this— This rhyming condemnation of humanity, This curse soaked into the earth like blood, This blood?

How do I sleep When there is so much blood It feels like I am drowning?

#the goblin speaks #poetry #i am so angry and devastated that it was allowed to get this far #what happened to 'never again' #genocide #ceasefire #ceasefire now #stop the genocide #palestine #free palestine #text post #i tagged this poetry #but honestly i just had to get some of this grief out of my body #i feel like i'm drowning in this #i feel like nothing we have done has helped and i'm so angry #i don't know what to do anymore

[arcandoria]

.

#I'm so emotionally drained with Mist having these back leg problems that never go away or go away and come back #and there's no clear answer to what's going on #nothing on xrays #nothing on blood work #and he takes meds for arthritis but limps again #and he's fine then he's not again #I'm spending whatever little of savings I have to get him to a vet specialized on cats #but I'm at the end of my rope here and I'm desperate #I just want him to be okay and have a life without pain #I want to know WHAT is going on I'm fine with giving him any sort of specialized care for the rest of his life if I need to #but I need to know what's wrong and no one can figure out what's wrong with my baby #I don't know what to do anymore #rambling

[du-hjarta-skulblaka]

Welp. Currently looking like im out of work until June.

So we're done, basically.

#my boss messages me TODAY with a number to call and when we do they're like oh :) no sorry applications are closed until June now #which. company policy is that not having this registration means unpaid suspension #now there was some mention before of maybe being able to do a risk assessment to work through that #but. until i hear back on that. that's it lol we're done #we simply cannot afford to live on one salary #alfies broken tbh. im just. numb #i don't know what to do anymore

[starsonmarsy]

i hate doing this.

so we have a downed, live wire. the siding of the house fell off and pulled on it. something about the transformer and a whole bunch of other electric things that i don't understand. our power is now cut off for the safety of us and our neighbors.

we need money for the electrician to come ASAP. we don't know how much the job will be. probably upwards of $500. one even wanted $100+ to come do the estimate alone. we are trying to find an electrician that will do the estimate for free. we don't know if our insurance will cover it. i really hope they do, but it's a toss up.

we were already struggling, and i also just quit my job for my health. i have already had to use all of my savings to help with bills earlier this week.

anything would be helpful and very appreciated

my c-$happ is $marchingmartians

#i fucking hate asking for things i want to throw up #so many stressful things have been happening and i'm so tired #i don't know what to do anymore #mars.txt

[purplemageddom]

Bad news...

My tablet broke

And now I can't draw

#‪ᯅ̈ #Screaming into the void #On christmas eve too #I don't know what to do anymore

[apersnicketylemon]

Aight, not gonna lie I need some help this month, it’s been rough this past year. 

I have candles, soaps, and jewelry for sale here 

If nothing in my shop interests you but you still want to help me survive this and next month, you can donate here too

I hate asking, but every account is in the negative right now, by a lot, my bank fees come out of an already negative account tomorrow (Currently -$34) meaning a double overdraft fee (Normally $40, so I’ll have to pay $80 for being disabled and poor) and my phone bill was also twice what it usually was thanks to a glitch at the bank that failed to pay my bill last month without my knowledge on top of that, and I am at risk of having my phone shut off if I cannot pay it all off this month (Another $116).

The CRA also recently told me I received an additional CERB payment in 2020 that I wasn’t entitled to, and must repay them a further $2000 that I simply do not have, and have no idea how to get. 

Naturally all of these things are coinciding in the worst way. 

Again, I hate asking, but I’m desperate and don’t know what else to do anymore as I don’t qualify for disability because I’m married and married after my condition kicked in which prevents me now from working anything I’m qualified for as I cannot walk fast or for a long time, let alone stand for any real length of time. 

#Donation request #please help #I don't know what to do anymore

[bury-me-alive]

I should have never started working, I should have checked myself into a psychiatric hospital

#bipolar depression #mental disorder #mental illness #su1c1d4l #bipolar disorder #tired #i wanna die #anxiety disorder #i can do anything right #I'm gonna get fired #mentally unstable #actually bipolar #sh #i'm ruining everything #anxiety is ruining my life #depression is ruining my life #i don't know what to do anymore #i wanna kill myself

[naamahdarling]

.

#either shit is going to get a lot worse for us in the next year for us or it's going to get worse but also better #and I'm so beaten down at this point and unable to trust or hope that i don't really think it will be the latter #so I'm just sort of marking time until it hits at which point i can give it all a pass/fail and go all in or hit da bricks #which i don't want to do but you know sometimes just walking away from it all is the best choice you can make #sorry this is cryptic I'm just so miserable and dispirited the more news i get because the bad stuff is what always happens #and the good shit never pans out for long #i don't know what to do anymore

[literallyajcrowley]

"Stars which envy thee" I wrote this for my ex when we were still together, might as well show it to the world (no one's gonna see this)

#poetry #notes app poetry #original poem #poets on tumblr #relationship #I don't know what to do anymore

[its-captain-sir]

.

#i know i should be kinder to myself and accept that not everything i do is gonna be perfect or turn out exactly how i want it #but god it really feels like everything i create lately has just been getting worse and worse #i can't think of what the last time was where i was seriously and genuinely proud of something i created #like where i actually liked it instead of just only seeing the flaws #literally everything i do now be it writing or drawing or physical art or whatever. it all feels wrong #like the ideas suck or my execution is just terrible. it's just bad and i never know what to do to fix it or just make it a little better #it's so. rahhhhhhhhh it's so frustrating #i don't know what to do anymore #delete later

[momo-de-avis]

I'm starting to think I just went from regular migraines to cluster migraines

#i don't know what to do anymore #it feels like everything is a cause #the weather #the light #not having coffee #not having breakfast #my sinus #my constantly blowing my nose at all fucking hours of the day #loud noises #too much sun #wearing sunglasses when its darker #not enough sleep #too much sleep #neck pain #back pain #speaking too loud #dead ass these all feel like they cause me migraines #i haven't been to the neurologist in years bc I sincerely didn't need it #i did treatment before and i got better #but it just got worse out of nowhere #and I am fucking sick of doctors #i genuinely dont have time for more appointments

[dinasmoon]

me saying I'm good when I'm throwing up from how anxious and stressed I get when it gets too much

#someone help me please #taking a break is so hard for me #i don't know what to do anymore #princess speaks࣪𓏲ּ ᥫ᭡ ₊ ⊹ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃

[auguste-rlg]

realizing i have no one is

#like i have nothing to hold on #i have no reason to stay alive #i'm tired of ppl telling me they're here for me but they just end up leaving #i'm tired #i want to go #please #i don't know what to do anymore

[megabondlocalfan]

Day 42 of saying random stuff until a new Kid Icarus

A small challenge,

Draw your persona in this outfit.

Maybe it'll be a weekly thing I don't know.

Besides I'm bored

#random #kid icarus #art #challenge #art challenge #outfit challenge #i don't know what to do anymore

[the-finch-address]

crossposting my vent here. cw for medical shit

Sooooo. My kidneys are shot.

I’ve been seeing my doctor about medical issues for a while now but it was only late last year (november) that she sent me to see a nephrologist (two, actually), both of which disregarded my results of a 60 EGFR (stage 2 kidney disease, mild to moderate) and told me I was young and probably fine. 

Well. Now that number is in the 30s and I’m stage 3B (severe) and less than a dozen numbers off from total kidney failure. My CKD now has twice the mortality rate. So first off I’d like to give a big ol’ fuck you to my nephrologists and secondly, uh. holy fuck.

My next appointment with my nephrologist isn’t for another week and I’m trying real hard not to make a panic decision and try demanding a sooner appointment, but like, those numbers went down in less than two months. A matter of weeks for it to decline two fucking stages.

I have the kidneys of an alcoholic and nobody I’ve seen has been able to figure out why! And kidney transplants don’t come cheap or easy around here so I’m basically staring down a row of empty options if my numbers keep declining. Which is. Yknow :)

#not crossposting for attention i just #idk I feel like I need to tell someone or i'll go crazy #my life is already a fucking crackshow because of the Everything Else and now this happens and i'm just #I don't know what to do anymore #vent cw