#I don't think it's good for me to become intensely suicidal 2-3 times a semester

[howtobeamagicalgirl]

:(

#ranntics #I kinda just want to give up on school #I'm doing super well but it's not good for me #I don't think it's good for me to become intensely suicidal 2-3 times a semester #esp when I never had that issue before starting college #I want to finish school #I'm so close!! just two more years of undergrad!! #but... it's gotten to a point where I start breaking at the end of the semester #I'm scared that one day I'm just going to stop getting out of bed #or that I'll start to get ready for class one morning and just collapse #I'm afraid to go to class every day bc I haven't turned in assignments in weeks #I'm not sure why exactly #but I absolutely dread it #and when I look at everything I have to do before the end of the semester I just think #'can I really do this? am I really going to be able to pull myself together and do this?' #I've done it every semester but THIS one isn't coming together at all #and that's terrifying #I can't write #I can't read #all I can do it procrastinate and do other things to take my mind of the stultifying workload that just keeps growing