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bakugosbratx · 3 years

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Baby Eyes | Mafia Katsuki Bakugo x Fem! Reader

Warning: 18+ Content. Some non-con, blood, murder, Mafia Bakugo, Fem! Reader, bdsm, sexual intercourse, size kink, degrading, orgasm denial, Stockholm syndrome, yandere themes, etc.

Words: 2,896

A/N: thank you so much to @daisy-bakugo for letting me participate. It is really fun doing this collaboration with you. Daisy’s Event

Tags: @awilddreamerwrites @peachsenpie @miriobaby @milkthistletea @idfkwtfgof click here to see my other works

Vegas.

Many dream of this city. The gambling, the drinks, the money, the night life. It has it all. Your dreams and worse nightmares can be made here all within a single night. The world may be cruel, but Vegas is even crueler. At least, it is for Y/N.

Your pistol was held tight in your trembling little hand. You have not been properly trained for this moment since in your late teens. The weapon felt foreign to the touch. You are now in your twenties and you are usually not doing this line of work, but since you wanted to disturb your significant other while he was working, he handed you the gun for you to handle.

“Since you want to be such a fucking cry baby, here.” He growled, shoving the pistol into your pounding chest. You gasped.

“S-Sir, I—“ You stammered, using the name he loved to be called by you. You would help it lessen your punishment, but the man did not budge.

“Don’t keep me waiting, brat. Finish this piece of shit off swiftly and quit your damn crying.”

You watched as he left into the city lights of Vegas before turning your attention back to the male before you. The man begged for mercy beneath you and your mouth feels dry.

“P-Please, ma’am. I-I have a w-wife and t-three beautiful c-children. I’ll g-give you your m-money next week. I-I promise.” The fearful man stammered amongst the abandoned dark alleyway. You have heard this speech by many like him when Katsuki brought you on his missions. It should just fall on deaf ears, but tears still brimmed your eyes as memories flooded back to the forefront of your damaged mind.

These memories are the reason you are in this predicament. You begged and squealed, running towards Katsuki and hanging onto his arm when he directed you to stay in the car. You two could have been gone by now, but you decided to intervene. Now you are here, about to commit another murder.

Your father was in this same position a few years ago. Begging for mercy before Katsuki slaughtered him right in front of you. Your cries still echo this alleyway during late, breezy nights. People think you have been disposed of as well. That is what eventually happened to the remainder of your family, but you are just under a new identity.

The barrel of the gun digs deeper into the victim’s temple. You attempt to find your strength to pull the trigger. You need to before Katsuki returns. He does not like waiting and you really are pushing what is left of his buttons today.

“I’m sorry.” You whimper out, closing your sorrow filled eyes and pressing down on the trigger. The feeling of blood splattering amongst your cold skin brought back even more unwanted memories. Falling to your knees, you began to cry hysterically in front of the fallen corpse.

Heavy footsteps came up behind you after a few moments. Katsuki has been watching the whole time and you know it. This is what made the experience even worse. You know his judgment is coming. He gave you a task and although you succeeded, it isn’t good enough. He hates your emotional ways. ‘Baby eyes’ as he would say. Always crying over something or someone.

A big calloused hand entangling into your hair with a deep sigh following. You could not look up at him. You hate him right now. You need to, at least, but the feeling of his large fingers stroking your scalp delivered comfort. A comfort he gives and takes away on a whim.

“Took you long enough.” Katsuki grumbled. You gaze up at him with a pitiful look he knows all too well. There was a certain aura to you that changed when your mind drifted to that night. The night he murdered your family right in front of you and all you could do is watch in terror.

“I-I’m sorry.” You muttered out, already accepting that Katsuki is annoyed with you. This is not your first murder and sure will not be your last. He has groomed you long enough for you to know your role.

Katsuki kicked the man’s head with his large foot so he could see the man’s pleading face. Katsuki is cruel in that way. He loved seeing his victim’s expressions in their final moments. Especially when his beautiful woman killed them.

Digging into the man’s pockets, he grabbed his pack of cigarettes and black leather wallet to review what was contained inside it. The little cash the man held is now in Katsuki’s possession.

“Marlboro Reds,” Katsuki commented as he slipped the cigarette in between his moist lips and lit it up, “nice.”

Turning around to face you after letting the nicotine enter his system, he looks down at you. Grabbing your chin, you are forced to meet his gaze. You tremble under his touch.

“What did I say about that crying shit?” Katsuki recalls one of your many lectures.

“I’m sorry!” You exclaimed, a little too loud for your own good. Katsuki’s eyebrows furrowed together, not pleased with your tone. His hand found a way to your neck, giving you a nice squeeze as he guides you up to your feet.

“Let’s go.” Katsuki growls, his red orbs shooting venom into you. Your arm is now tight into his grip as he leads you to the parked all black Lamborghini.

You climb into the passenger seat while Katsuki climbs into the driver’s. You used the napkins in the glove compartment to clean up your soiled face. Katsuki is already on his second cigarette as he drives to the mansion you both share. Considering how fed up he is with you and your antics, you are surprised that half of the box is not gone by now. You know you are in for it once you arrive home.

Katsuki pulled up to the house after some time. Your tears did not pause once the whole way there which only agitated Katsuki even more. He did not say a word as you know to follow the tall man inside. Straight up the spiral marble staircase to the master bedroom, you begin undressing as Katsuki does not appreciate the mess in his living space. Along with the fact you are always to be naked within the bedroom. That rule was set once you turned eighteen years of age.

You sat on the edge of the bed, not enjoying the look in Katsuki’s angry eyes. His muscular arms folded against his chest as he leaned against the wall, glaring into you. You feel small — as usual — within his presence. He is making sure you remember your place.

“What the hell were you thinking out there, Y/N?” Katsuki begins after moments have passed.

“I-I don’t know.” You mumbled, twiddling your thumbs in your bare lap. Your insides are curling with each passing second. You are not sure why you did what you did, honestly. You have seen numerous people plead for forgiveness at Katsuki’s feet, but Katsuki is always going to be a merciless man. Your body acted before your brain could compute. You just wanted to save him. Salvage your loved ones death in some way, shape, or form, but it can never be done.

“You have to give me a better excuse than that. This little rebellion you're on lately isn’t doing nothing but getting you into heaps of trouble.”

“It’s not a rebellion!” You snap back, tears still spilling from your orbs. “You killed my family, Katsuki!”

Katsuki rolled his eyes, used to this statement coming from you. “Here we go again.” He scoffs with a tsk following shortly after. “We’ve been over this, Y/N. Your father sold you and your family out for cash. If anything, you should be fucking grateful I even let you live.”

“Grateful?” You repeat in disbelief, a half hearted chuckle escaping your lips. Maybe it was because Katsuki let you take another life, maybe your parents' spirits are coming through, or maybe you’re just so fed up with him, but a sudden burst of confidence runs through you.

You stand up, strolling over to the man before you. His jaw is clenching as he examines each cowardly step you take towards him. You glare up to the man before you, quivering before his mighty presence.

“You killed my family, Katsuki,” you repeat through gritted teeth and clenched fists, “I’ll never forgive you for that.”

“Oh yeah?” Katsuki challenged, his profound amused smirk appearing. The look in your glossy irises said all the words you didn’t have the courage to speak. “Good thing I really don’t give a fuck about your forgiveness, princess.”

Katsuki’s words soaked into your veins like venom. His smug looks always made you want to beat it off of him. Ever since you have met him. You both know you have no match against him. He will always win. Always.

You have been stuck with him since you were fifteen years old. You two never had any relationship or any sexual conduct until you were the legal age of eighteen. You would be lying if you said you didn’t fall for him over the years. He is all you know and Katsuki grew to like you over the years. Though he trained you to be the woman he wants you to be for him, you do throw a tantrum or two when needed.

“I hate you.” You sniveled.

“Sure you do. Let’s clean up that pretty face of yours so I can stuff it, eh?” Katsuki chuckled, cupping your chin with one hand so he can wipe your nose with a handkerchief with the other. You attempted to break loose of his firm grasp, but the male was not even phased.

“I don’t want your dick anywhere near me.” You admit allowed, still keeping the same angry tone within your words.

Katsuki arched his eyebrow, releasing your face from his grip and discarding the used cloth into the waste bin. “Considering the show you put on out there tonight, you’re lucky I’m not doing worse to you. I can always make that pretty ass of yours bruised too if you’d like?”

You immediately shake your head no. Your bottom is still a bit sore from two weeks ago when Katsuki put you over his knee. You are just now able to sit normal again. You do not need to go back to that.

“No, sir.” You stutter out, backing away from him and putting your hands behind your back. Katsuki is already pouring himself some whiskey into a whiskey glass that you make sure is always waiting on his dresser. He always enjoys a good drink after a long mission.

You take his black suit jacket off of him like expected and lay it on the dirty laundry hamper. Katsuki is already sitting on the bed, sipping on his alcoholic beverage, waiting for you to get to work. Kneeling before him, you begin unzipping his slacks and tugging down his underwear to reveal his erected cock. You take a moment to contemplate your future actions. You really did not want his dick in your mouth, but like Katsuki said before, you do not have a choice in the matter.

Your train of thought is derailed when Katsuki tugs on your hair. “Isn’t going to suck itself, brat. Get to work.”

Mentally groaning, your tongue swipes his length before placing kisses on the tip. Slowly, you begin taking in inch—by—inch. Saliva slid down his cock by the time you had it in your throat. Choking noises fed Katsuki’s already inflated ego.

“Can’t talk much with my cock down your throat, huh?” He teased, taking another sip of his whiskey. “For someone who claimed they didn’t want my cock to begin with, you sure are deep throating it rather quickly.”

You ignored his usual insults as you came up for air. You let out small coughs then go in for more, every vein being pleased with your tongue as you take it all in. Katsuki groans in pleasure as you pick up the speed. His cock is coated in your saliva as you did not slow down once to catch air. It wasn’t worth the ego boost he would feel from knowing he is too big for you.

Katsuki’s whiskey went unfinished as he could not focus on drinking it. Cum soon fills your hollow cheeks and down your throat as he releases into you. Not a drop was missed as you milked his cock. You were rewarded with a head pat.

“On the bed,” Katsuki instructs, “all fours.”

“Do I have to?” You whine. Katsuki vigorously grabs your chin, staring down into you. The room is dark, but his crimson eyes seemed to glow.

“If you know what’s good for you, you’ll get on this fucking bed and shut your Goddamn mouth.” Katsuki hisses, sending chills down your spine. You do as you are told like he taught you. Arching your back, your ass is now in his perfect viewing. Katsuki’s clothes discarded to the hardwood floor below, his dick already erected at the sight of you.

“See? That wasn’t so hard now, was it?” Katsuki asked, rhetorically. He spreads you open more for his personal view. “Yeah, that’s it.” He comments, overviewing all of you. One of his hands stroked his cock while the other pressed on your begging clit. You let out a soft moan, hoping he didn’t hear.

Placing his hands on your hips, he drags you closer to him. Leveling you with his cock, the tip slowly slips into your entrance then proceeding to pick up full speed. Your cunt swallows all of him, hugging his cock with each rhythmic thrust. You can feel your tight walls get stretched by his girth with each entry he makes, not even giving you time to get used to his size as he exits to repeat the same process. No matter how many times you two have sex, you will never get used to Katsuki’s length and size.

“Katsuki—“ You sob in pleasure and in pain.

“Shut it, slut. You’re going to take all of my fucking cock and like it. I’m going to fuck the brat out of you tonight.” Katsuki demands, pressing down on your spine so your ass is more perked up for him to smack periodically. Your cries and moans are muffled into the European satin sheets below. You grip onto them for support as Katsuki does not slow down once.

Your pussy pulsates with each thrust. It was about to give out on you and cum all over his cock. Though you did not want to give him the satisfaction, your cunt had other plans as it became tighter around Katsuki’s length.

“Aw, is someone going to cum?” Katsuki coo’s condescendingly, beginning to go agonizingly slow.

You lift your head to beg for sweet release. “Please let me cum, sir. Pretty please. I need to oh so badly.” You sobbed. His silence made your insides do flips. His slow strokes did not once stop and his nails dug into your thighs.

“No.” Katsuki finally denies as he knows you cannot take anymore. You gasp, your heart stopping for a split second.

“Katsuki, please.” You hiccuped. “I really need to.”

“Should’ve thought about that before throwing a tantrum today. Good girls get to cum.” Katsuki shrugged, using his long muscular arm to push your head back into the mattress. “Now shut the hell up while I fuck you senseless.”

Just like Katsuki stated, he fucked you until his high was met. Of course, he did not make it easy as he was about to bust, he would go slower to edge himself. He wanted this to be a punishment to remember. The whole time, you behaved and did not cum. No matter how many times Katsuki tried to get you to slip, you refused.

“C’mon and cum, brat. Y’know you wanna.” Katsuki would tease with immaturity. All you could say was incoherent “no thank you’s.” A soft rub on your ass was telling you that you passed his test.

Countless minutes, maybe even hours, have passed until Katsuki decided he was ready to release himself. “You can cum now.” He finally grants. You did not get to even process his words as your pussy released onto his cock. Babbles of pleasure and gratitude escaped from your lips.

“Good fuckin’ girl.” Katsuki praises, his cock now removed from you. You whine at the hollowness you felt.

“Lay on your back.” He instructs, doing his best to keep it together. You follow his request and switch over to your back. “Play with your tits.”

Your fingers grab onto your sensitive nipples, swirling on them before giving them a nice little pinch. Katsuki stood over you, stroking his cock that is covered in his pre-cum.

“Yeah, that’s it. Good girl.” Katsuki praised once more, analyzing your lewd faces as your fingers played with your breast.

“Mm, cover me with your cum.” You encouraged, rubbing your thighs together and pushing your breast closer to one another. Katsuki became feral as cum squirted onto your chest and stomach. Just the sight of you is making Katsuki forget today ever happened.

Just like always, baby eyes.

©bakugosbratx

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sundresstyles · 2 years

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Part 1

Stella and Harry have been friends for as long as they can remember. They met in fourth grade when Harry and her were sitting beside one another in science class. The teacher gave them both a beaker and was told specifically to be very careful. Unfortunately, things did not go as planned. Harry, being the clutz he is, had accidentally knocked his beaker over so it broke and shattered on the floor between them. The sound of the glass hitting the floor brought silence to the room, and without another thought, Stella had quickly pushed her beaker over to Harry so it would look like she was the one to break it instead of Harry.

The teacher came rushing over to scold whoever broke the glass. Harry was shocked that someone he had never even talked to would do such a thing for him. The teacher had practically yelled at Stella, but she didn't care. That's why she did it in the first place. She knew the teacher's yelling and anger would upset Harry so she took the blame. Harry looked at her dumbfounded, growing guilter and guilter by the second that she had to go through this because of something he did. When the teacher left after giving her a new beaker, Harry turned to her and asked why she did that.

"Why'd you do that? You don't even know me."

She stared at Harry for a moment and shrugged.

"Eh, why not?"

From there on out, they were best friends and the perfect pair. Whenever Harry got picked on Stella was there to stick up for him. She would take a busted lip or black eye from Harry's bullies if it meant Harry didn't have to. Harry was always there for her as well. Whenever Stella was upset, or alone, Harry was right by her side, even if she didn't want him to be. It didn't matter if he was studying for an exam, out with his family, or sleeping, he would drop everything to make sure that girl was okay. Needless to say, they've been joint by the hip since the age of nine.

When Stella found her date to the prom making out with some girl in the bathroom, Harry was her shoulder to cry on.

When Harry was getting cornered by bullies again, Stella stepped in and stuck up for him.

When Stella was wearing white pants and had gotten her first period, Harry gave her his sweater to tie around her waist and later came to her house with a box of chocolate.

When Harry was nervous for his X-Factor audition, Stella stayed up with him all night, helping him practice for the big day.

The pair were a set of twin flames.

And they still are to this day.

Harry and Stella are about to fly home to Manchester for the holidays to see their family today. They haven't been home in months so needless to say, they're very excited. They're staying in New York because that was where Harry's last tour date was and because Stella really wanted to be in New York throughout the holidays and with the both of them being so close, Harry did the same. He had no reason to go back to LA for two weeks when he could just stay in his penthouse living in the same city as his best friend.

"Stella, come on! We're gonna be late!" Harry shouted from the living room of her apartment. Their flight was at 3:30 and it was currently 2:30. With traffic, security, possible fans or paparazzi, they really should have left half an hour ago.

"Oh shut up, I'm almost done. If you wanted to be on time you should have told me to leave half an hour ago so I would really be done by now." It's true, Harry knew better than to expect her to be on time. That girl would be late to her own funeral.

"Stella!"

"Harry!" She mocked.

Harry looked outside the window to pass the time and saw the snow falling so heavily that he could barely see the building across the street. Harry got a sick feeling in his stomach when seeing the downpour of the frozen snow and got increasingly worried. Harry quickly grabbed the remote that was sitting on the coffee table and turned on the TV, then flicking to the news channel.

"Due to recent weather conditions, all flights set for departure between 2:00 pm today and midnight on the 28th of December will be cancelled..."

Harry was on the edge of his seat while receiving such news while Stella finally walked out of her bedroom. "You couldn't wait five minutes? You really had to turn on the TV? I-"

"Shhhhh," Harry cut her off quickly. Stella stopped strolling her suitcase and went over to the couch to sit beside Harry and see what he was staring at.

"All roads will be closed as well due to the heavy snowfall. Please, do not leave your homes unless absolutely necessary..."

"What?" Stella whispered, realizing she would be stuck in New York for Christmas.

"Our flights are cancelled Stell, there's a massive snowstorm," Harry tells her while she looks outside the window, confirming what he said. They both felt unbelievably disappointed. They wouldn't be going home for the holidays. They wouldn't see their family. And Christmas wouldn't be the same.

"Fuck," Stella says.

"Yeah."

"I knew I should have booked the earlier flight. Fuck, this is all my fault," Stella mumbles. "I'm so sorry Harry."

"No it's not Stella, you know that. Don't do that to yourself. You're not mother nature, you don't control the weather," Harry says to her sternly but calmly.

"Right..." she says, not convinced but pushing her emotions to the side to deal with the current issue at hand. "So the roads are closed... you wanna stay here then?"

"Is that... okay with you?" He asks.

"Yeah Harry, of course." She nods. "I'm not gonna lie though, I kind of wishing we were stuck at your place instead of mine," she laughs, Harry joining in just after.

Harry lived farther uptown than Lindsey did. While yes, the two were joint at the hip, they by no means lived together. Harry lived in a penthouse while Lindsey lived in just an average-sized apartment. She had a place in LA, New York, and London, just like Harry... but her homes were more average-sized. She wanted a more homey feel and didn't want a giant house anyways.

"Fuck, what are we gonna do?" Stella sighs.

"Common Stell, we can do it. It won't be that bad," he says while trying to cheer her up. "It will be so cozy. We can light those candles you love, there's wine, we can watch movies!."

Stella sighs, processing his words. "Yeah you're right," she agrees. "Wait I don't even have a tree," she groans.

"You had one last year..."

"Yeah but that one was real so it died," she explains.

"But you were allergic to it so after Christmas you bought a new one because they were on sale," he reminds her.

"Oh yeah!" She nearly yells in excitement. "Okay, so it's in storage then.."

"Let's go get it." Harry claps his hands and grabs her keys so that they can go down to the storage unit. They walk out the door together and take the elevator all the way down to the basement where her storage room is.

"Fuck I hate it down here," she says. "It's so eerie and cold." She crossed her arms for both comfort and warmth.

Harry wraps an arm around her and rubs her arm in an effort to warm her up. "We'll be quick." They find her storage room and stop to see an absolute mess. "So uh..."

"It's a mess, I know." She rolls her eyes. "I haven't been down here in a while so hopefully it's near the front."

"... Okay well..." Harry says before they get to searching.

The pair begin searching the storage room for the box that holds the Christmas tree. After nearly twenty minutes of trying to even get a foot inside the room, they eventually find the box.

"Harry! I found it!" Stella shouts. "Oh! Ow," she says after a loud crash

He rushes over to find her completely trapped between a bike, about 10 bins, the Christmas tree box, and a cotton candy machine. "Wow, I never knew you were a hoarder..." he teases.

"Oh shut up and help me." She reaches out her hand and Harry takes it, pulling her up but underestimating his strength and sending her toppling the other way, only this time she falls into his chest.

Her hands rest on his chest to allow her to stabilize herself after the sudden movement and her eyes stay trained on the area between my thumbs. Once her ears can process his voice she slowly looks up at him to see his brows furrowed and eyes full of concern. When she finally comes back to her senses, she pulls away from Harry so they're no longer touching.

"I- sorry I just..." she rambles, not making eye contact with Harry and tucking her hair behind her ears.

"No uh, it's... uh... the tree!" Harry suddenly shouted out, changing the subject.

"Yes! The tree! I found it!" She says, nearly jumping.

"Great so uh... how do we get it out?"

It took the pair forty-five minutes to get the Christmas tree from her storage room to the front door of her apartment. When they finally got inside the apartment Stella walked over to the couch and threw herself on top of it. "Ah, that was so hard," she sighed while Harry stood in the doorway.

"You barely held it at all..." Harry chuckled to himself

"Oh please," she rolled her eyes. "I held plenty."

"Mhm..." Harry said, bringing the tree from the doorway to the living room. "Gonna help me with this or..."

"What if you set it up and then we can decorate together?" She said staring at him from the couch.

"Why am I surprised?" He says to himself. Harry begins to set up the Christmas tree while Stella micro-manages him from the couch.

"Over to the left a little? No, the other left... ah now the right..."

"Stell, why don't you just get up and do it?" Harry sighs.

"Because I don't want to..." It takes them only 10 more minutes to have it set up perfectly. Just as they were about to start decorating, Stella's phone began to ring. When she picked up her phone and saw the caller ID she was overcome with a wave of anxiety "Fuck," she said. She didn't mean for Harry to hear her curse, but he did and was immediately concerned.

"What's wrong?" He asked, making his way over to her and sitting on the couch.

"My mom's calling," she mumbled. Harry knew her mom and she had a tough relationship, but despite them being best friends, she's never told him the true extent of it.

"Oh? Um... I mean she's probably wondering where you are so..."

"Yeah, I should answer, I know. I'll be right back," she says, taking the call and walking into her bedroom. "Hey mom..." she says, trying not to sound overly anxious over the wrath that was bound to come.

"Lindsey..." she begins and Stella cringes at the sound of her first name. "Why did you not tell me your flight was cancelled? Do you think it's acceptable to not only not come home for Christmas... but not even tell me about it?"

"Mom I'm sorry for not telling you but it's not my fault the flight was cancelled." She tells her mom the same thing Harry told her only moments prior, whether she believes it or not is another question. "There's a snowstorm outside and I-"

"I told you to book a flight for 9 am, but you and your lazy ass didn't want to get up then. How is there fair to me Lindsey? I do so much for you and you can't even come home for Christmas? Jesus I mean I knew you're selfish but I didn't think you were this self-centred to just not come home for Christmas." Stella begins to feel her eyes burn with tears.

"Mom..."

"No Lindsey, listen to me. It is not fair to your siblings, your nieces and nephews, me. I mean after all that we do for you..." She sighs.

Stella felt rage within her body. Her chest. Her hands. Her mind. Her voice.

All that they do... all that she does? Words could not even begin to explain how wrong and hurtful that sentence is to Stella. "What?" Stella whispers, but it wasn't soft. No, it was filled with anger, hurt, sorrow. It was the kind of whisper that could make fear strike through one's body. Yelling when mad was one thing but whispering. Whisper shows the last bit of control of your body has, as if all it can do at that moment is whisper because all other energy is spent on anger.

"What do you mean 'what' Lindsey? We gave you a roof over your head, a family, life. I mean I raised you, took you to all those guitar lessons and other useless shit... and never once have you shown any kind of appreciation."

"Useless? Mom those lessons are what has given me my career. The career that has put your two youngest children through college, has given your oldest a wedding and you a house! I gave you a roof over your head mom. That right there is my appreciation! You gave me the bare necessities that a mother should give so please do not think you have won the mother of the year award." She's yelling now... no screaming. Her voice was filled with pain and anger. Her throat hurt as she felt her voice strain and that lump in the back of her throat begin to form.

"How dare you speak to me that way young lady! I am your mother and you will treat me with respect... that is how this relationship works!"

"Why? Why should I treat you with respect when you only ever treat me with utter shit." Her mother gasps. "I swore... big woop." She rolls her eyes.

"I should not have to earn your respect. I gave you life, you give me respect."

"No." Stella state.

"No?"

"No." She repeats. "You gave me life but you made it miserable," she says, holding back tears. "You said learning guitar was useless and that I should just give up. When I came home from the mall with my first ever crop top you said I was too fat to wear it. You said I couldn't eat carbs when I was 12 because carbs make you fat. You said that you wish I was more like Molly Jenson because she's pretty and gets good grades. When I dropped out of college you said that I made a terrible mistake and will end up homeless."

"You drop out of college to pursue music when you were on your way to earning a Ph.D.! Of course, it was a huge mistake!"

"It was what was right for me mom!" She was crying now. Tears streamed down her face and her voice sounded choked, she didn't let that waver her point though.

"Oh please! You dropped out the first chance you got!" She yelled.

"Yeah, I did. I had the chance to pursue my dream with my best friend and world-famous singer, Harry Styles... it wasn't just a chance mom."

"You did that just to hurt me. Again, you have no respect Lindsey... our conversation makes a full circle."

"How can I treat someone with respect when they've only ever made me feel insignificant, a burden?" She sniffles. The honesty, vulnerable words struck Stella deep in her heart and she had trouble controlling her cries... but she did.

"On Christmas..." her mom sighs and she could only imagine she was shaking her head as well. "If you didn't ruin Christmas you sure have now. I will not continue this conversation Lindsey and I will not be spoken to like that. I wish you well and I only expect to hear from you when you have a well-rehearsed apology ready for me to hear." And with that, the line goes dead. She hung up on her.

Stella stared at the wall across from her for a moment before she whips her phone at it, screaming with force and not even realizing what she was doing before the damage was already done. She looked at the new dent in the wall, then at her phone, and then she dropped to her knees and sobbed.

She had completely forgotten that Harry was even in her apartment so when a pair of strong arms wrap around her she's thrown off at first but soon realizes it's Harry. She feels embarrassed. Embarrassed that he's seeing her life this, embarrassed that he's holding her, and embarrassed that he knows.

Harry and Stella are the closets of friends who know nearly everything about each other. Harry always knew that Stella and her mom had a rocky relationship but never knew how bad. Stella never told Harry how bad it was because she knew her mom was lovely... to everyone but her. She was an angel to her children, grandchildren, Harry, strangers... everyone but Stella. This would always make Stella feel like a burden but also as if she was wrong and being dramatic because no one else understood or could relate.

If my mom is an angel to everyone else, how could she be even close to mean to me... Stella would think to herself, which made her feel like she was only being dramatic.

Stella never told Harry because she always felt wrong. How could she speak ill of her mother? She didn't want Harry to see her differently either so she never told him to protect her mother's reputation.

"I'm sorry," Harry whispers before kissing the side of her head. "I had no idea, Stella."

Stella continues to cry in his arms. It all comes out, everything she's been hiding from Harry throughout their friendship, everything she's kept in.

Harry knows it's bad too because there has only been a handful of times that Stella has openly cried in front of him. She never comes to Harry with her problems. She always keeps them in and Harry knows that. He was always there for her though, even if she didn't want him to be.

There were times where he could see she wasn't okay... or even just sense it, and when those times occurred he would be there for her, never making it obvious that he could tell she wasn't okay though as he knew it would only make her uncomfortable.

That being said, she was still very good at hiding her emotions and lying about how she was doing. She didn't want people worrying about her so she made sure no one did. Little did she know, Harry was always worrying about her, mainly because he knew she was lying.

One of the lies Harry never saw through though was her relationship with her mom. He knew they weren't exactly the closest but he never thought that it was this bad. Her openly crying in his arms proves that.

Harry coos her with his words for the next 20 minutes while she cries, her sobs turning into small sniffles and hiccups over time. Once she realizes what's happening, her embarrassment is overwhelming. She tucks her hair behind her ears and briskly wipes her tears. "I'm sorry I shouldn't have-"

"Stella stop," Harry says to her, kindly but sternly. "You can come to me, you know that right? Why didn't you tell me? Why'd you keep it in?"

"I-I don't know..." she says, looking away from him. "Because it doesn't matter... it's whatever."

"Stella... talk to me." He picks up her hand.

Stella looks at her hand, then back at him and sighs. "She's upset I'm not coming, thinks I'm selfish and..." she sighs, talking about everything again brings that heaviness back in her chest, "she thinks my career is a mistake and I only dropped out of university in spite of her and just a lot of other stuff I guess."

"How long has it... been like this?" Harry didn't know how to word his question. How do you ask your best friend how long her relationship with her mother has been the equivalent of utter shit?

"I don't know," she shrugs and Harry gives her a look again. "Always... she's always been like this to me."

"Why didn't you tell me, Stell? Why'd you always hide it?"

"Because she's my mom!" She shouts in frustration. "How can I... she's just... UGH! She's my mom, and she's so nice to everyone. Everyone loves her, you, my siblings, strangers... everyone. I love her too but..." she trails off.

"Mhm?" He encourages her to be open while rubbing his thumb on the back of her hand.

"But I don't think she loves me," she says, letting out a gut-wrenching sob after the unwanted words.

Harry brings her back into a hug, consoling her cries. His heart breaks hearing this. "I'm so sorry Stella, so sorry," he says rubbing her back and kissing the top of her head. "Listen, why don't we watch a movie, get some snacks, order take out..."

"The roads are closed, Harry..."

He chuckles, "right... okay, we'll make dinner if you have groceries, if not it's chips and chocolate for dinner."

"That sounds like a lot of fun... thank you," she sniffles.

"Alright, let's get you up," he beings to stand and grabs Stella's hands to help her up as well.

The pair realize she has very few groceries but does have a load of chips and candy in typical Stella fashion. They ended up just grabbing all of the junk food and placing it on the coffee table, grabbing loads of blankets and curling up on opposite ends of the couch, which were not very far from one another.

As Stella grew more and more tired throughout the movies she began to fall asleep on Harry's shoulder. Harry felt her subconsciously nuzzle into him, and when he did he lightly kissed the top of her head and directed his attention back to the movie.

When the ending credits appeared on screen, Harry very lightly shook Stella to wake her up. He would have just carried her to bed, but getting up would have been difficult with her lying on top of him. "Stella, wake up, let's go to bed," he kindly whispered.

Stella lifted herself off of him and rubbed her eyes. "Oh," she said, realizing she fell asleep. "Okay, let's go to bed," she said getting up. "Wait, where are we sleeping? I only have one bed," she said once they're both in her bedroom, still holding the blankets from the couch.

"Oh it's fine, I'll just sleep on the couch," Harry said, taking the blankets so he could sleep out there.

"No no, I'll sleep out there don't worry" Stella stops him and takes the blanket so she can give him the bed.

"Stella, common, I'm not gonna take your bed," he says.

"Okay how about this, tonight you get the bed and tomorrow, I get it and then we just take turns from there? Deal?" Stella proposes, keeping to herself that she was going to do everything in her power to make sure that she isn't sleeping in that bed for the next few days.

"Stella no, you were upset earlier, how is that fair. You deserve a good night's rest," he says, wanting to make sure his best friend was alright.

"Okay, would it make you feel better if I slept in here?" She asked, her hand resting on her hip.

"Yes!" Harry confirmed, throwing his hands up in the air.

"Okay, fine." She takes the blankets and begins to set them up beside the bed.

Harry walks over to Stella to see what she's up to on the floor beside her bed. "Uh... what are you doing?"

"I'm sleeping in here and you are sleeping in my bed." She smiles.

"Nuh-uh." He shakes her head. "H-how is that- no... no you are sleeping in your bed."

"No actually... I'm sleeping here." She sits down and gets underneath the covers, proving her point.

What Stella wasn't expecting was what Harry is about to do next. "Okay." He says. He then walks right over to Stella and gets underneath the covers with her.

Stella looks over to him and sighs. "What are you doing?" She asks.

"Going to bed, goodnight Stella," Harry says.

She looks at him, scanning his face to see if he was kidding or not and once she realizes he's not, she takes a deep breath. "Fine" She rolled her eyes. "Goodnight Harry."

Ten minutes pass of the two of them sharing a very small blanket on the cold floor of her New York City apartment. She begins to shiver but refuses to let him win this small argument. Harry quickly realizes just how cold she is though and puts an end to all this. "Stella you're shaking, common, just take the bed."

"No Harry, the only person in that bed tonight will be you," she says stubbornly.

Harry puts his pride aside for the well-being of his best friend. "How about this, both of us take the bed?"

Stella looks over at him and sighs. "Okay." The two of them get up and into bed, Stella feeling warmer instantly. The pair haven't shared a bed like this since they were nine, and suddenly sharing a bed feels quite odd. They sleep on the very edge of either side of the bed, taking precautions to make sure neither of them is touching one another. "Goodnight Harry."

"Goodnight Stella."

—

Ten Years Ago

Seventeen-year-old Lindsey and Harry sit on the roof of Lindsey's house, a blanket shared between the two of them in efforts to keep warm. Harry was home from tour for the holidays and was spending his time with Lindsey. They were side-by-side, shoulder to shoulder. They couldn't be any closer if they wanted to be.

Harry had always had a special kind of love for Lindsey. He loved her unconditionally, but it wasn't until recently that he realized, maybe that love wasn't platonic. He's always had a bit of a crush on her since he was twelve and always liked the idea of being more than just friends with her, but he never realized that it was maybe more than a small crush. Harry looked over to her and was about to the words that have been on the tip of his tongue since he was 12. "Lindsey," he whispered.

Lindsey cringed at the sound of her name. She hated her name, always has. She only ever heard it from Harry and when her mom when she was in trouble, which most of the time she was. She's grown to associate her name with the feeling of anxiety and has had enough. She looks over to Harry and says what she's been thinking for a while now. "Can you not call me that anymore?" She says just as quietly as Harry had spoken her name.

"What? Why? I love your name," Harry says, surprised,

"I don't, I hate it," she murmured.

"Why?" He asked, surprised.

"I don't know... just sounds bad." She shrugs.

"O-okay," Harry says, not knowing where to go from there. "Well, then what should I call you?" The young girl looked over to him and shrugged again. She had put so much thought into the hatred of her name but never about the replacement. "Okay, what about Estella? Your middle name?"

"Nah, it's too long." She shakes her head.

"Okay... Stella then?" He asks. She looked over to him with wide eyes at the sound of the name, a smile creeping up on her lips. "You like that one?"

"Yeah... sounds like a rockstar... Stella Jones..." She smiled.

"Stella Jones it is then!"

Stella leaned farther into Harry and rested her head on her shoulders. Harry hadn't forgotten what he was going to ask the beautiful girl beside him, he never would, but he had decided to wait. Wait to ask if she maybe, possibly, wanted to be more... more than just friends. Harry never had the guts or confidence to say it, but he finally felt ready tonight. But with the new information of Stella hating her name, he told himself he would wait to do it tomorrow.

She was tired, and he was too. He couldn't ask anymore. He could feel her weight sink into him more and more and she began to fall asleep. He told himself twenty more minutes of peace outside here with her before he woke her up to go inside and then lightly kissed the top of her head.

"Goodnight Stella."

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sopxhiea · 3 years

Text

Lush

Alfie Solomons X Reader

Summary: Gradually but surely, the wild girl becomes easier to tame by Alfie but all he really wants to do is to set her wrath free and to be the only one who gets to have her.

"All it did was to turn me on."

“Everyone already thinks that we’re dating.”

Alfie was an unusual man.

Not because of his status as the big bad boss or the fact that he always had his cane with him lately. It had nothing to do with his reputation or the countless illegal things he’d done, not even remotely related to the fact that he had killed men with his bare hands and would do it again in a heart beat if the occasion called for it.

And certainly not because he still had you around.

The curtains were drawn, the space was unusually quiet for a weekday. No one dared to make a noise, except for the occasional footsteps and the shuffling. Some of the men were sitting closer to the window and their faces could be made out but you had no idea who was on the other side of the room, not that it mattered.

There would be the usual screaming, it was easy to spot it from miles away and you certainly looked forward to it.

It wasn’t fair, not really but it was never directed at you so you didn’t find it in yourself to care. Alfie would yell at the lads around every now and then, it had already been done earlier in the week but a boss had to do what a boss had to do and Alfie saw that as shouting at middle aged men so they’d do their jobs a little better.

All it did was to turn you on.

There were things that were hard to explain: how you liked your tea with lots of sugar and why you knew how to stitch a wound back together were only some of them and this just added to the long list of things. It didn’t bother you, just created an uncomfortable itch on your skin that made you want to be as close to the man as possible.

But the gem was still on.

The rules were slightly changed now that he had given you employment and a house. It didn’t put you in the lower part, you still had the upper hand and would never lose that but there were facts to consider and one of them was that Alfie was a man of extreme power who also happened to be a gangster.

It was only sensible to act carefully around the distillery with all the strange men going around. Ollie was with you most of the time when you left the office to go get something, per Alfie’s orders to keep you safe all the time. You still had a blade on your leg and a revolver in your bag but in Alfie’s eyes, those weren’t the most dangerous things about you.

Alfie was a strange man.

He had taken care of the bastard for you, his cold body had been swimming in Thames for a while now. You had thanked him kindly, in proper fashion but he knew there was a catch. This time he got to have that catch.

He still hadn’t asked for his favor.

You had not been into his bed yet, although it had been awfully close once, but he seemed to be determined with something else. You didn’t quite know if it was an ulterior motive of sorts, to get ahead of you in the game and if it was, you’d have to grant his wish since you’d promised him.

Even though you still didn’t know what it was.

You watched the lads exit the room one by one and the screaming started pretty soon after that. Alfie was fuming but the day had been a normal one, although it was hard to tell with him. His moods had been shifting too quickly lately, he was angry one minute and horny the next and you never really knew what was coming.

You stood in front of the door when the screams subdued and you could hear his agitated groans while he walked towards his office. He realized you’d been waiting for him when he spotted you and watched your flushed cheeks offer him a gentle smile. He didn’t return it but it compelled him.

Was something wrong?

You wouldn’t put it that way. After months of toying with the man, you had realized that this was wearing you down, too. The game was fun and you still played it well but touch after touch, little kisses here and there had weakened you. Alfie was already ready to go whenever you’d ask for a kiss which showed his frustration and it only made you respect him more for waiting for your call on it.

But he was becoming very hard to resist.

You took pride in having a thicker coarse of patience when it came to things that made you frustrated in any way but there you were, trying to calm yourself down as he walked towards you. You gulped right before he stepped in front of you, he didn’t say anything at first but just looked at you for a clue as to what was bothering you.

Nothing was wrong, you told yourself in a row for fifteen times. Nothing was. So what if he was becoming too hard to resist? You still got to kiss him as much as you wanted and at first, you’d though that would subdue your need for him but it turned out that it was just the opposite, the more you kissed him, the hungrier you got.

But now was not the time to give in.

He furrowed his eyebrows, arms at his side as he looked down on you. Your cheeks were flushed more than usual, eyes deep with something he’d seen before but he wasn’t so quick to judge. You were deceiving in many ways and who knew what was making you feel this way.

Except that the bastard knew.

“What’s happened, pet?” he spoke, voice soft as opposed to how he had been behaving a minute ago. You gulped, too subtle for him to notice but your cheeks gave you away anyway.

He knew that this turned you on: the power he had, the way men averted his gaze and most of all, the dominance he possessed. He had seen you lick your lips one too many times, voice always breathy when he’d return from shouting at the lads. That was the only time he’d seen you grow almost a bit sloppy, needy for his touch but you had immense self control and he wouldn’t deny that.

You blinked, looking at him through angry eyes. He knew what it did to you and yet, he had the audacity to flaunt it in front of you like this. It was fair, you supposed, you had tortured him a good amount and it equaled things between the two of you.

“Nothing too important.” you spoke, not tearing your eyes away from his lips as he looked down at your small form.

You were a marvel to play with.

“Didn’t scare you with all the fuckin’ shoutin’, now, did I?” he spoke, poking the beast with every little word that came out of his mouth. He was confident, cocky almost and it made you smile.

You were still the one who controlled the ropes.

Who was he to think that he could win?

His hand cupped your chin and titled your head softly so that you were looking directly at him, craning your neck to see the smirk on his face. It would wipe off soon, you knew. You blinked once or twice, far too innocent for him to think that you had an ulterior motive and spoke, voice soft against his face.

“All it did was to turn me on, sir.” you spoke, saying ‘sir’ like it would open the gates of hell for him.

It took him a minute.

It was times like these when he came into his senses. Sure, he was a wealthy handsome man but you knew the game like the back of your hand. He felt his pants tighten almost immediately, his body entirely too reactive to any act that came from you at this point. A grunt came out of his throat after a while, one of extreme approval but it was still a work place.

He nodded, blinked and nodded some more as an attempt to calm himself down but you were too impatient. You shot him a knowing smirk and walked inside the office, knowing very well that he’d be watching your every move. He gulped before following you after a minute of just standing in the same position, unable to get himself to move.

You’d be the death of him and he knew.

His grunts and murmurs about ‘not being respected in his own work place’ filled your air as you waited for him to close the door.

-----

“What do you mean exactly?” your voice was angry at this point, no point in hiding the already evident emotion on your face.

The audacity Alfie had still surprised you to this day.

Your arms were crossed as you looked at his sitting form behind the desk, he wasn’t fazed, not in the slightest but simply observing you and it only made you more mad. Your cheeks were flushed, from anger this time and he thought you were simply a vision but your words cut him off again. Like venom from a pretty crystal.

“Are you going to answer or should I repeat myself again?” you said, not beating around the bush in the slightest.

“It’s just a fuckin’ business meeting, pet. Jus’ a bit too far than the usual fuckin’ place.” he spoke, nonchalant about the whole thing.

“Alfie, first off it’s in Birmingham.” you said, trying to level down with him so that whatever that came out of your mouth didn’t mean that he would lash out at someone else later. It wasn’t a pretty sight. “And why do you need me to come?” you spoke, purely out of confusion this time.

What was he planning?

Sure, you played with fire but gangsters were a different kind of fire you were adamant on keeping away from. You had your dangerous man in front of you and one big gangster was enough, let alone two of them. You knew he had to make appearances here and there but this was out of the game, not something you had ever planned on doing.

“You scared, little bird?” he spoke, not joking in the slightest due to the look of uncertainty on your face. You gulped and nodded before speaking, voice a hushed whisper this time.

“These are not just any men.” you spoke while Alfie got up from his chair and walked from his desk to where you were standing, listening to you as you spoke with a look of adoration somewhere in his eyes. “I don’t want to die because I got stuck in between two gangsters in a pissing contest.” you spoke at last, knowing how these things went at this point.

“Nothing like that, eh?” he spoke, face closer to yours as he looked at your small form. He wasn’t blaming you, this was normal at the sight of something as dangerous.

But he’d protect you, he owed himself that.

You nodded at the words, searching his eyes for any sign of threat or underlying intention, there was nothing. This scary burly man who many feared had turned out to be a giant sweetheart and it scared and surprised you at every single turn. He was supposed to be a ruthless but all he had been to you was gentle.

It confused you to no end.

“What am I in this scenario, then?” you spoke, voice back to normal as you walked around the room with the swift sway of your hips.

The game was on.

“What would ya’ like to be, pet?” he spoke, hand waving through the air around as he looked at you. You shot him a small smile and he crossed his arms while standing in the same position.

“You’re the boss, aren’t you?” you spoke, answering his question with a more cunning one and it only made him chuckle deeply.

Your eyebrows raised slightly at the sound, far too used to the antics the two of you had but you were gradually becoming softer, easier on him and even forgot about the game of push and pull. You’d never lost a round, not yet but he was breaking down your walls, melting them one by one by the sweet torture of kindness.

He was not a regular man.

You’d thought he’d be a tough one to crack, pull a gun on you at some point and definitely offer you a lot of money to get you into bed: these were the things you’d expected from the Camden gangster but all he’d ask for were kisses and for you to be around. He had turned out to be generous, something you hadn’t seen in a while and it made your heart feel some type of way.

“You, yeah, you’ll be my fuckin’ secretary then.” he said, playing it safe but you turned around and spoke, confident as a minx as you looked into his eyes.

“Why not your girl?” you said, a smile on your lips and it took him by surprise.

He had to be careful so that he wouldn’t accidentally wound himself with the sight of you.

“My girl, eh?” he spoke, smiling but it didn’t reach his eyes. He was curious, wanted you to go further with your words.

“Your sweetheart, the woman you sleep with, your little bird..” you elaborated, treating him like the old man he was and it brought a smile to his lips, each little word that left your mouth shot straight through his heart. “...you know?”

Oh, he knew.

He wasn’t daft, or blind in any way. Ever since he had met you, it felt like a storm had hit him right in his heart. It wasn’t fair, he thought, that he was the one to succumb like this but he was willing to, if it meant that you’d be his. He had no intentions of taming you, no, just to know that you belonged to him at the end of each day. He wanted to be your home, the pair arms to hold you.

And that wasn’t like him.

Wasn’t he a cruel gangster, one that had killed many with just his fists? Why did it matter now that his old heart wanted someone? It had been a very long time since he’d felt the longing for a soul, long before the war. The feeling was still gut wrenching. Too dense for him to swallow.

“Why would ya’ want that?” he asked, eyes following you and he stopped at your features to watch for any sign of emotion.

Only mischief.

He was the one in the wrong for playing with you in the first place, the one to blame for how deep he was in the mud but he didn’t want to get out. You were siren for him, a calling of sorts and even if it meant that you’d ruin him beyond recognition, he didn’t care. He supposed he had never cared.

“Everyone already thinks we’re dating.” you spoke, amusement dancing in your eyes and it earned a smile from him.

“Yeah?” he asked, but he knew the answer all too well.

You weren’t officially his girl, certainly not behind closed doors but on the street, you wore his name like an armor. You weren’t between the walls of the school anymore and people talked, really talked, around here. For all of Camden knew, you were his girl and it would not take long before you were wed.

Although there were other things said about you, too.

You were not easily tamed, most still saw you around certain clubs each week but the whispers were loud. It didn’t bother you, people liked to talk and that was not something you had control over. But the things you’d heard made you snicker. About how it was the perfect match: you and Alfie.

The wild girl and the ruthless gangster.

You smiled at him and nodded, almost too gently this time. Your words were audible as you spoke, voice still softer than what he was used to. “I’m sure you’ve heard.”

“Aye, I have.” he said in a heartbeat. He liked the chatter, most gossip was shit and usually untrue but people had so many scenarios of how it had happened that it made him smile.

For some, he had slept with you on your first date and couldn’t get enough. Some others thought that he had proposed on the first date, unable to resist your charm. Word had gotten around your absence in the boarding house which only made people think you were knocked up and about to get married.

“Which one is your favorite?” you said, finding this all too fun with the one person who knew what had actually gone down.

He smiled and watched you relax on the sofa after you sat down, hand tugging at his beard as he spoke.

“I heard one, yeah, I did where you were fuckin’ pregnant.” he spoke, amused at the words that were coming out of his mouth and it made you giggle, all of it. “And apparently we’re gettin’ fuckin’ married next week.” he said and you smiled at the words.

“So what do you say, hm?” you spoke, reminding him of your proposition of posing as his lover.

It was all too tempting.

But he wasn’t sure if he could just act that way, controlling himself around you had been hard enough without you acting like you were his girl. He looked at you for a while, almost measuring something before clearing his throat. You were still sitting on the sofa when he spoke.

“Alright.” he exhaled, a low smile on his lips while you looked at him with wide eyes.

“Alright?” you said, a little taken back by the fact that he’d agreed. Sure, you were the one who had the upper hand and he’d be a fool to say no but he was still the gangster in this equation, the one with the gun and the power.

“Why the fuck not, eh?” he said, more talking to himself than you. You let him go on, rambling on like he usually did while leaning against his desk.

You got up, slow enough for him to get a good look at you and walked towards the man. He really had to do something about the tightness of his pants, he noted while watching you. It was an innocent act from the outside but your eyes told him otherwise. Your voice was breathy, like how it would sound after he kissed you senseless.

“But you have to act the part, sir.” you spoke against his face, he was leaning against desk and almost sitting on it but somehow still taller than you.

You looked right into his eyes, not breaking eye contact as you licked your lips. His eyes followed your tongue, watched the way you wet your lips and it earned a gulp from him. You smiled afterwards, his eyes didn’t leave your lips. His hand found your waist, slowly caressing the soft skin over the silky material of your dress.

“I will.” he said, gently pulling you towards him by the waist. He was about to kiss you but you put your hand on his chest, stopping him.

“It’s just business.” you spoke, reminding him of where he stood in the game.

He was losing, badly so but he didn’t seem to care in the slightest.

It worried you.

The game was only fun if he played with you. So far, he had put up a good fight but he was getting careless about it. He let you win, easy and clean. You wanted the chase, the thrill but Alfie just seemed to want you. There were times he caught you off guard, he was still good at the game but it seemed as though he didn’t care anymore.

And a vision of you with him in the future struck you.

If he let you win this much, he was willing to be around as much as you let him.

“I kno’ that, you minx.” he spoke against your face before stealing a kiss from you. You let him, too distracted by your own thoughts.

Maybe you would sleep with him.

It only seemed fair.

You took a few steps back, he let you go while keeping his eyes on you. You would tell him, he didn’t seem to be playing the game and it threw you off. You took a breath, looked at him and spoke with certainty.

“I’m going to leave now. Come by at 6 pm sharp.” you spoke, calculating and he knew what it meant.

He had done it, cracked the code.

It was your way of giving him a way in. It wasn’t surrender, the opposite. You held enough power to let him have you but the chase had you tired, frustrated almost and you needed some relief. Your own hands didn’t do the dreams justice and you knew, you just knew, he’d make it worth his own while.

You’d be waiting in your own home, ready for him to get you into bed with all you had. Everything had been a bit too much lately and you thought you deserved a treat, Alfie was the sweetest treat of them all afterwards. You looked at his smile, inviting and happy like a kid as he eyed the clock and prayed for the minutes to pass by faster.

You were not surrendering, you thought yourself.

This was not you losing, just giving him an in.

“If you’re late by a minute, Mr. Solomons, you don’t get to have me.”

He watched you leave with an expression he hadn’t seen before and looked at the clock the entire time while waiting for 6 pm to come around. There was a silly smile on his lips, one that he had not put on since the war.

He had won.

----

Tagging: @clairecrive @parkbearum @sourirez @vetseras @mollybegger-blog @babylooneytoonz @peakascum @fuseburner @r-rose08 @innerpaperexpertcloud @caffinated-tree @cathartichaoss @ihavefandomsssss @thatchickwiththecamera @sugarcoated-lame @alainabooks143 @enrapturedbythemoon @a-southern-doctors-drawl @houseofdupree @evangelinesolomons @kissmyoops a/n: This is taking a different turn but i’m not mad at it :) I’m getting a lil’ bit busy with school but i will keep them coming as fast as I can. I hope you enjoyed this chapter and do let me know what you thought of it!!

Happy Spring, dear ones <3

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holycow99 · 3 years

Text

石田お寿司 12/9/21 stream translation Part 1

This is not the full translation of the stream. I only translated the parts I could understand & interpret or parts I found interesting/important. I’m still a beginner in Japanese, so the translations may not be accurate. If you want to repost, please repost at your own risk.

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I: Hello. Can you hear me? Good night. (t/n: He’s replying to a comment.) You can hear me? Hello. Welcome.

I: My tone sounds great today, ***-kun? (t/n: OP commented that his tone sounds great.) Of course I’ll be excited in the beginning of the stream. But only in the beginning.

C: Your voice somehow sounds young.

I: It’s because I just slept.

*Typing on twitter

I: I finally did it. This is a simultaneous worldwide stream. Do you understand it? Ah, I’m so tired. I’m tired of sleeping.

I: I’ll be drinking my coffee. Itadakimasu.

I: It was a long vacation, wasn’t it? When was the last time you guys heard from me? On September…Well, it doesn’t matter.

I: I don’t have anything particular to do for this stream. I just felt like it.

C: I’ve been listening to your streams repeatedly during holiday.

I: Thank you.

C: We last heard from you at the end of August.

I: I see. Thanks.

C: Thank you for your hard work on the manuscript!

I: I did the rough sketches first. I was brainstorming.

*Someone commented on Animal Rap.

I: Animal rap? I actually wanna try this. Actually, I’ve done recording for one video, but won’t it be scary if suddenly in the middle of the stream, animal rap video is uploaded. Without saying anything, suddenly there’s a new animal rap video being uploaded. Won’t it be scary stream?

(t/n: I’m not sure if the translations for this part is correct. He said something more but I haven’t reached this level of Japanese understanding skill. Forgive me.)

C: Animal rap itself is scary, so it’s okay.

I: What a hilarious thing to say. Are you actually afraid of animal then?

C: Have you got vaccinated?

I: Nope, since I’ve been locked up in my house. I want to though. I want to get injected a lot. Around 10 times.

C: Sensei, did you read Berserk chapter 364?

I: Is it the final chapter?

Y****: Let’s inject the head.

I: Nice one, Y****. Well, since Y**** is an introvert at school, he must be a non-popular kid. Because he doesn’t have any friends, he can’t wait to meet me. Is it like that? Hahahaha.

I: I’m not even aware of the things happening around me. I don’t even know when the exhibition in Osaka will open. I want you guys to tell me about me.

C: I’m aiming to be a mangaka, but having someone that can be a mentor for me to learn from is better, as expected?

I: I don’t think so. It depends. In some degree, it’s better to do it by yourself. If you really wanna write a manga and you wanna create an environment that allows you to do so, if there’s a chance to be an assistant, I think it’s better for you to grab it. Because you’re still not familiar with how these things work. I think it’s better to be an assistant first. You don’t have to be one for a long time though.

C: I want to diet. Where should I start?

I: Record your weight. Measure your weight and record it in calendar. Doing that makes you feel conscious about your weight. You’ll probably can lose weight that way.

C: Are you still eating oatmeal?

I: I’ve been eating Onigiri only.

C: I wanna change job, but I’m anxious to because of the economic situation. Please encourage me!

I: It’s better for you to change job, since you said you wanted to. I think everyone is anxious. There’s no one who isn’t.

C: I’m happy that the JJ illustration that you posted on twitter will be made into goods!

I: Yeah, without my permission. Hahaha. When the illustration was made into goods without my permission, I was like “Eh? This is…”. I’ll stop talking about this. Hahaha. I won’t talk about this.

*Someone commented about Kingdom exhibition.

I: I wanna go to the Kingdom exhibition.

I: What I said just now (about JJ illustration) was a lie. Please forget about it. Are there companies like that? Of course not. I was just joking. If that’s the case, then anybody can freely turn my illustrations into goods. Though there’s a person who sent me the PugMax t-shirt.

C: I wanted to be a mangaka when I was small. As I got older, I only immersed myself in the real world. I’ll be a civil servant starting from next year. I don’t have the courage to challenge myself, so I want to give my unconditional support to those who are.

I: I don’t know how old you are, but you can still draw even if you become a civil servant. Just draw one if you really want to.

C: You have to collect royalty.

I: I do get royalty. I get 5 yen in total.

C: How old will you be this year?

I: 250,000 years old.

C: How are you?

I: Like usual. But I made progress on the manuscript, so I’m relieved. I kinda forgot how to draw it.

C: I thought you were in your 30s.

I: Nope, I’m far older.

C: You haven’t started game streaming?

I: I’m haven’t decided yet for today.

*People were discussing about his age.

I: Doesn’t matter how old I am.

C: Do you prefer women with long hair or short hair?

I: Short hair.

*People commented about Heavy Rain.

I: Oh, you want to see me playing Heavy Rain? I’m okay with that. I’m okay with playing games or anything. I’ll be a yes-man for today. Everyone’s yes-man & toy, Ishida Osushi.

*Someone commented about Animal Rap again.

I: I wanted to say something about this. I’ve done the animal rap video. I only upload videos I’ve received from the animal themselves, not me. But I was afraid to upload it, so I refrained from doing so. I wanna try uploading the video while streaming. That’s what I wanted to say. Well, it doesn’t really matter. I just upload it after I finish streaming. I don’t understand the need to upload the video and streaming at the same time.

(t/n: He said something more, but again, info on Animal rap is hard for me to decipher. I’m really sorry.)

C: What did you watch recently?

I: Movies.

C: There were people who got scared by the fact that Ishida Sui raps.

I: No, you’re wrong. Ishida Sui doesn’t rap. Ishida Sui doesn’t do streaming as well.

C: Do mangakas have the chance to meet women?

I: It depends on the person. The ones who’re locked up in the house won’t. But…That’s right. You might if the workplace has mixed genders. You also have the chance to meet people during party or some sort. I’ll always be at the corner every time I go to parties. It’d be nice if the party was fun and the staffs could enjoy themselves. I also said that I went to parties to take a break, but I hated it.

C: You’re not going to parties?

I: Nope, I won’t. The company doesn’t hold them as well because of the current situation. Even if I did, I wouldn’t know what to do. I don’t really eat the food, and introducing myself to people is tiresome.

I: S****** is here.

S******: Ishida Osushi can become a pro mangaka.

I: I’m aiming for it.

C: Fukuoka suits you, sensei.

I: Somehow, I feel grateful. It’s like you’re telling me that it’s okay for me to live in Kyushu.

(t/n: Kyushu is an island where Fukuoka is located.)

C: Sir Osushi, what do you think of Sir Sui?

I: I have a murderous intent towards him.

C: Does the thumbnail hold any meaning?

I: It does. Look forward to it.

C: Being a streamer suits you (Osushi) better than being a mangaka.

I: Hahaha.

C: The drawings of Neji (JJ character) by Ms. Towada were wonderful!

I: That’s right. Neji drawn by Ms. Towada. I want you guys to tell me something like this. I want you guys to tell me about my current situation. Things like, “would you retweet this?”, “This is JJ’s…”, “The CD’s also…”. Let me change my twitter account. First is Ms. Towada, right? Let’s retweet Ms. Towada’s tweets. I thought of drawing something like this. She drew quite a lot. She drew him more than me. I feel bad having her to draw it. I feel grateful rather than feeling bad. She drew a lot of them. Yonaga’s illustration looks nice. I see… There’s like an incomplete rough drawing. I thought of copying and drawing that illustration. I’ll just retweet this. Tell me what should I retweet next.

C: Is Ms.Towada doing well as well?

I: I talked to her a few days ago.

I: Do read Fool Night.

C: Do you like Aespa? (t/n: Aespa is a kpop girl group. Ishida had drawn one of the members.)

I: The girl caught my attention. I thought she was beautiful.

*Someone commented about his illustration of Ano-chan. (t/n: Ano-chan is a Japanese singer. Ishida had come to her radio programme once, and he did the album cover for her latest album.)

I: Ano-chan! What happened to that? Have you seen the album cover? It’s already out?

*Someone commented about Fool Night.

I: The world in Fool Night is super amazing. It was quite a while ago, the person in charge of the Superior magazine watched one of my streams and asked me if I could write some comments. I was like “Don’t tell me that!” (referring to watching his stream). I hate being seen. But then, I was like “whatever.” I usually turned it down, but I just wrote for this one.

*Someone commented about Wooma (t/n: an illustrator.)

I: Who’s Wooma? Let me check it.

C: Sensei, I’m a good child. So, is it okay for me to sleep?

I: Yes, of course.

C: Sensei, do you smoke?

I: No.

I: Ah, Wooma is the illustrator for the song ‘Usseewa’. Sorry for the lack of knowledge.

C: Do you watch Christopher Nolan’s works?

I: I’m not that familiar with movies, but I may or may not watch it. I’ve been getting into movies lately. I searched for the movies Takahashi Kunimitsu told me about. You tend to watch anything when you’re obsessed with movies, right? I was also obsessed with history for a while after I learned how fun it was from Takahashi Kunimitsu. I’ve been reading 2-3 books on history a day lately.

C: Until what time are you gonna stream?

I: Today is infinite as well. We have another 12 minutes left. Haha. I’ll keep on streaming today. I won’t end the stream today. It may end tomorrow. (t/n: He definitely kept his words.)

C: Sensei, do you like itzy? (t/n: Itzy is another kpop girl group, and Ishida had also drawn one of the members.)

I: Yes.

I: Tomorrow is a holiday? There are people who are not working tomorrow.

C: What are you drinking?

I: Coffee.

C: You only need another 800 people to reach 30,000 subscribers.

I: Yeah. It’s gonna reach 30,000. I have to make an appreciation stream or video for 30,000 subscribers. A lot of youtubers are doing this, so I have to do it too. I wanna do it. Feels like a youtuber. Isn’t it fun? I wonder what should I do for it? What would be fun? Let’s go with this concern first. I get lost if I don’t go one-by-one. It’s one of my bad habits.

*They’re planning on what Ishida should do when he reaches 30,000 subscribers.

C: Show your nails.

I: I don’t do manicure.

C: Heavy Rain.

I: Wanna play Heavy Rain as well.

C: Please let us hear your sneeze.

I: There is such person sometimes. Creepy.

C: Why don’t you play Ghosts n Goblins for now?

I: After the stream, I felt like playing the game. They had something like magical clock, though I forgot the name. The one that double the speed of the game. I really wanted to play that, honestly. Though, it wasn’t suitable for streaming. I thought of playing it in my own time. I really like that kind of games.

C: Will you sing when you reach 30,000?

I: During the previous silent stream, Queen Bee’s song was playing. Those who watched may know. I thought of appearing for a moment and sing and then end the stream. I wouldn’t do it, but I just thought about it. At that time, I wanted to try having just an illustration stream.

C: I’m waiting for an autograph session after the Corona ends.

I: The pandemic probably won’t end for at least 2-3 years.

*Someone wanted him to sing Gaston’s song.

I: Gaston. Singing, huh? Hahaha, why am I having second thoughts? I thought I’m okay with anything.

C: how about a karaoke battle?

I: Karaoke battle, huh?

C: Do you have any piercings?

I: I’m not wearing one right now, but I do have it. (t/n: I didn’t expect him to have a piercing. He’s really different than what I imagined a mangaka to be. XD)

C: I’m hoping for JJ’s song covers!

I: JJ? JJ’s songs are difficult. It was super hard during the time I did the covers. Seriously, when I heard it back…The cover for the opening theme was scary. I thought my singing ability had increased since I recorded this one the last. A few months ago, I listened to it after a long time, it was…what should I call it? A sutra, no, a curse. Me and JJ’s opening theme. I forgot the title of the song. Jack and something. There were parts in the songs where the female and male characters had to harmonise. To convey that part, I had to cover the song multiple times. I multiplied into 7 people, since I had to record as Kisa as well. When I was recording Kisa’s part, the other version of me at the back, probably Kai, was harmonising with me. I was told to deepen my voice by Mr.Kasama. So embarrassing. The voice was really low. I was drawn by Mr. Kasama’s voice. His voice was really good when he said ‘Broccoli’ for the cm.

*Ishida imitating Mr. Kasama.

I: It’s cooler than this.

*Imitating him once again.

I: I was like “So cool!”

C: Invite the animals that appeared in Animal rap as guests.

I: That’s a good idea. But what would the guests be doing? It’s absolutely hard to do that. It’s hard to invite the animals because of corona.

C: The title is “Jack & Jeanne of Quartz”.

I: Right. Thank you.

C: Won’t you invite Hanae?

I: I won’t. That’s impossible. (t/n: I want to see him playing horror games with Hanae Natsuki.)

Part 2

#ishida sui #tokyo ghoul #jack jeanne #choujin x #chojin x #ishida sushi channel

34 notes · View notes

misskikuwrites · 3 years

Text

Piece by Piece (2/2)

Bederia Week 2021: Day 4- First Argument/make up

Bede/Gloria (dressedinpinkshipping)

Tags: fluff, hangovers, mutual pining

Words: 7,533

@bede-x-gloria

Gloria woke up feeling as though she'd been flattened by a stampede of Dubwool. Her head throbbed. Her throat was dry and raw, and the light streaming through the gap in her curtains seared her eyes as if she was staring straight into the sun. She rolled over, turning her back to the window, and groaned hoarsely. She squeezed her eyes shut. Buried her face in her pillow as a wave of nausea sloshed in her stomach. She felt ill. Whatever sickness she'd picked up last night, it had quickly taken hold.

Great, another reason for me to hate the Gala, Gloria thought, and swallowed thickly. Pain lanced her throat as she did. She moaned into her pillow when another wave of nausea hit her, stronger this time. Her throat tightened. She curled into herself with a faint whimper.

I don't want to be sick, I don't want to vomit, I don't-

Another surge of nausea, rising higher up her throat. Gloria let out a sharp puff of air through her teeth, trying to keep the nausea at bay, to fight it down, to stop herself from retching. Pain drummed behind her eyes with every beat of her heart. She remained curled in a tight ball when her bedroom door clicked open and soft footfalls approached her bed.

"Not feeling so good, huh?" Gloria's mother's voice sounded too loud in her ears. The bed depressed next to her. "I've brought you some water and some painkillers if you're feeling up to taking them."

Gloria cracked an eye open at her mother. She had to blink away tears that formed beneath the onslaught of painful light. Her mother smiled kindly at her, holding a plastic cup in one hand and a pack of painkillers in the other.

"Don't worry, Hop told me what happened." Gloria's mother placed the cup and the medication on Gloria's bedside table, and gently touched her daughter's shoulder. "Hangovers are never pleasant, but to experience one at your age, when you'd been given alcohol without your knowledge… oh, hun." She smiled sadly. "I'm so sorry you're going through this."

Gloria blinked at her mother, her eyes slowly widening. A cold cloak of dread settled over her shoulders as pieces of last night came back to her. Fragments of colour, of faces and names that were now a blur, the bubbly sensation of sparkling wine on her tongue. Elliott. The boredom in his eyes, the way he'd shrugged when Bede had confronted him. Nausea crawled high up her throat. She tasted bile.

"Fuck," Gloria hissed through her teeth. She squeezed her eyes shut to stop the prickling of tears that threatened to fall. "He gave me alcohol."

She hadn't picked up a virus. She hadn't caught something from someone at the Gala last night, from dancing and mingling with people for hours. Gloria had a hangover.

A shuddery breath escaped between her lips as they wobbled, and Gloria clenched her jaw in indignation. A different kind of pain thrummed through her chest, through her veins, blending with a surge of nausea. How could he do that to me?! She'd trusted Elliott. Lowered her guard around his sweet, understanding smile, and he'd taken advantage of her. Used her for his own entertainment. Her throat burned with ire, with the fury she wished to spew at him for doing such a thing to her. No longer did she shrink at how naive she'd been to trust him. No, it wasn't her fault. Elliott had plied her with alcohol, had woven his lies, in a way that left her unsuspecting. If not her, he would have done it to someone else. She at least had gotten home safely.

Gloria sat up with a groan, wincing as her head throbbed from the movement. She grabbed the cup of water off her bedside table and gulped down a mouthful before popping the painkillers into her hand and taking them with the rest of the water. Her mother took the cup off her and stood.

"I'll bring you some more water," she said. "If you're feeling up to it, you should come and have some breakfast. You haven't eaten since you left for the Gala last night."

Gloria sank against the head of her bed with a sigh. "What time is it?"

"Just after ten."

That explained the heavy gnawing in her stomach.

"Hop's here too," her mother continued, "he stayed overnight to make sure you were okay."

"Mm…" Gloria closed her eyes. Her headache made it difficult to think, memories of last night lying faint and out of reach. Breakfast sounded delightful, but she wasn't sure if her stomach would cope with anything more than the water and pills she'd taken, and didn't want to risk bringing them up. Exhaustion weighed heavily in her bones. Slowly, she sank beneath her blankets as her mother went to leave the room.

"Go ahead and sleep," Gloria's mother said. "I think you deserve to take it easy today after all that."

Gloria grunted in response, already burying her face in her pillow, longing for sleep to take hold. It wasn't long before she began to drift off again, strange memories of Bede filling her mind. Faint light illuminated the blush on his face. Her fingers cupping his cheek, dusting her thumb across his flushed skin. Bede tentatively resting his hand over hers. His eyes widening in shock. He was close, so close, and the look on his face-

Sleep took hold before she could wonder why he'd looked at her like that.

A few hours later, Gloria groggily stumbled from her room. She shuffled into the kitchen, driven by the ache in her stomach, and stopped to stare at Hop where he sat at the dining table.

"Morning, Glo," he said cheerfully, before catching himself. "Wait, I mean 'afternoon.'"

She glanced at the clock on the wall and winced. It was already past one o'clock.

"I really slept that long?" Gloria asked. She shook her head in disbelief, instantly regretting the motion as her head pulsed with pain. She swallowed a groan and dug out a box of cereal from the pantry, pouring herself a late breakfast.

"We figured it'd be better to let you sleep it off," Hop said. "Feeling any better now?"

"Eh."

She no longer felt like she was going to heave her stomach out through her throat, but the dull throbbing of her head remained. Everything was too bright, too loud. Gloria flopped into the chair opposite Hop, and slowly munched away at her cereal.

"Where's mum?" she asked.

Hop watched her with a curious look on his face. "At work. She only took the morning off so she could look after you, but you seem to be doing alright now."

"I just wish this headache would go away," Gloria huffed. "Guess it hasn't been long enough for me to take another dose, huh? I should've slept in more."

"You can have more pills in an hour," Hop said. "Until then, you've just got to suffer. Sorry!"

Gloria snorted. "Wow, thanks for the sympathy." Sarcasm rolled off her tongue in between mouthfuls of cereal. She rolled her eyes at him, but couldn't help noticing that he was still giving her a strange look. As though he was waiting for something. "What?"

Hop stiffened and his expression froze in place. "I didn't say anything."

"Then why are you looking at me like that?"

He glanced away. "It's, uh, nothing, really. But you should probably check your phone."

"My phone? Why?" Gloria frowned at him. He was avoiding her gaze, shifting awkwardly on the chair. Uncomfortable, uneasy. Something had happened. "What did you do?" she asked, narrowing her eyes.

"Me? I didn't do anything!" Hop balked.

She glared at him suspiciously for a moment longer before standing and marching into her room to retrieve her phone. She snatched it off her bedside table and clicked the screen to life. There were a few unread messages waiting for her. Gloria read through them as she stalked back to her half-eaten breakfast; one from Sonia, another from Marnie, both filled with concern and asking how she was. Leon had typed out an apologetic message, saying that he'd heard the rumours about Elliott and wished he'd cautioned her about them last night. The sincerity - and guilt - in Leon's text made Gloria smile softly as she slid back into her chair and returned to munching at her breakfast. Hop still had an expectant look on his face, sitting on the edge of his chair. He looked away quickly when she glanced up at him.

It was like he was anticipating something. Gloria frowned, and turned back to the messages she hadn't read yet. There were three unread texts from Bede, one of which he'd sent a week ago when she'd bolted halfway through him teaching her to dance. He'd sent the message in reply to the excuse she'd given him that something had come up and she was busy. Gloria hadn't been able to gather the strength to read his text. She'd left it unread for a week. In fact, she'd kept her phone off for the first few days, dreading a phone call from Bede. Gloria felt her stomach twist in trepidation now as it had a week ago. She felt Hop's eyes on her. Felt the thorns of fear dig into her heart as its grip tightened around her again. She wished to shove her phone aside, to ask Hop point-blank why he was looking at her like that, to leave Bede's messages unread for as long as she could.

But she couldn't. Gloria took a deep breath, quiet and subtle enough that Hop wouldn't notice her fear, and checked the messages from Bede. Immediately, her fears from a week ago were dispelled. The text Bede had sent in reply wasn't accusatory at all, wasn't suspicious or gruff. He'd accepted her excuse, and hoped that everything was okay. At the end of his short message, he'd reminded her that she could always ask him for help. That was it. Gloria stared at the message in disbelief as the weight of her fear dropped from her shoulders. She'd been so worked up over nothing. It was almost laughable- almost. Her gaze drifted automatically to the two remaining messages Bede had sent, both from last night, and her blood ran cold. It was the third and final text that froze Gloria to her core.

When you're feeling better, please call me. We need to talk.

Dread crashed over Gloria. Like she'd been caught by a towering wave, the air stole from her lungs. She couldn't breathe. Her head was underwater. Her mind churned. It left her winded as though she'd been dumped by that very wave, toyed with and spat out on the hard sand.

We need to talk.

She felt cold. The spoon slid from her hand and sloshed into her cereal, her fingers going numb. She was going numb. Her heart thumped painfully loud in her ears, and she slowly lifted her gaze from the words on her screen to look at Hop.

"What did you do?" Gloria asked. She forced the words out through the fear constricting her throat. "You told him?"

Hop blinked at her. His uncomfortable unease shattered into an expression of indignation. "What? No! Of course not!" He bristled, huffing at her. "Why would you even think that?"

"Bede wants me to call him," she said, studying Hop closely. Still unconvinced. "He said… he wants to talk."

There it was- Hop stiffened as if he expected her to say that. He knew.

"See! You know something!" Gloria jabbed an accusatory finger at Hop. "What did you tell him?!"

"I didn't say anything!" Hop protested. "Didn't need to - not that I would've anyway - with you making it obvious like that."

"Like what?" She frowned. "What are you talking about?"

What did she do? Her mind spun, wracking her memory of last night for whatever it was Hop was insinuating. Had she given her feelings away without realising it?

"Glo, I saw it. There's no point pretending you don't know what happened," Hop said. He shifted uncomfortably, looking away from her.

Gloria's stomach swirled anxiously. "Saw what?" She thought back to that moment on the balcony with Bede. Her memory was fuzzy, clouded with intoxication, the very words she'd said to him were muffled as though she were trying to listen to someone speaking through a thick pane of glass.

Hop glanced at her incredulously. "You seriously don't know?"

"If I did, I wouldn't be asking you!" Gloria said, huffing in exasperation. "What are you talking about?"

He opened his mouth to speak, before pausing. Hop studied her for a moment, a few seconds passing as his expression turned from frustration to surprise and then the unease returned. He looked away.

"Gloria, how much of last night do you remember?" Hop asked, quieter than before.

"All of it," she said confidently. Hop turned back to her and Gloria's heart flopped. Suddenly, she doubted herself. The look on his face, the fact that he'd asked that question in the first place, sent a prickle of fear down her spine.

"What's the last thing you remember?" Hop asked.

"I…" She struggled to find her voice. "I remember coming home…" The memory was a blur of nausea and tears. "I think- I think mum helped me out of my dress and got my makeup off…?" The more she thought about it, the fuzzier her memory was.

"And before that?" Hop looked as nervous as she felt. "At the Gala?"

Gloria pursed her lips in thought. "Um… I remember getting into a Sky Taxi somewhere? Marnie was there too, I think?"

Hop nodded slowly. "Anything else?"

"I remember Elliott," Gloria huffed. "That asshole. He came out onto the balcony with another drink. That's when Bede confronted him and…" she trailed off as her expression soured, lips curling in distaste. "He admitted to giving me alcohol on purpose. For his own amusement. The whole thing was such a shock, I started crying. Bede, he brought out this lacy handkerchief from Arceus-knows-where and helped me clean up my makeup."

Gloria breathed a faint, sheepish laugh at the memory. "I must've looked like such a mess."

Hop nodded slowly. "What about after that?"

Gloria frowned. "I already told you. We got out of the Gala and went home."

Hop went quiet. He chewed the inside of his cheek awkwardly, again shifting on his chair, and his nervous mannerisms sent a trickle of panic down Gloria's spine. She was missing something. Something big.

"Hop, what happened?" she asked. Her chest felt tight. Too tight. It was difficult to breathe. She felt dizzy. Hop refused to look at her. Her cereal, having turned into an unappetizing soggy slop, sat half-eaten in front of her. She stared at it as the pounding of her heart clouded her mind, her fingers clenched in the fabric of her pyjama shorts.

"Hop," Gloria asked again, "what happened?"

What did I do?

Hop's answer sounded far away. Like he was talking to her in a dream.

No, not a dream.

A nightmare.

"You kissed him."

Gloria couldn't breathe. "Haha, very funny Hop." She wasn't smiling. Neither was He.

"It… wasn't a joke."

It didn't make sense. Hop didn't make sense.

"What…?" She looked up from her cereal. "What do you mean it's not a joke? I didn't-"

Dread. She felt dread.

"I- there's no way I'd-" Gloria couldn't say it. "I wouldn't do that."

But she couldn't remember. Her memory, no matter how hard she tried, remained dark.

"I saw you kiss him," Hop said, looking away. He winced as he said it, knowing the pain his words inflicted on Gloria. The dagger he drove deeper into her heart.

"Are- Are you sure it was me? Not someone else?" The world was growing fainter around her. Words spilled from her lips in confusion, in desperation. Out of fear. "How do you know that I- that I did it and not… not Bede? Maybe he was the one who-" again, she couldn't say it. Caught on her tongue, she couldn't give that word a voice.

Hop grimaced. "No, it was definitely you who kissed Bede. You, uh, had your hand around the back of his head and… pulled him towards you."

Gloria's heart stopped dead. Shadows danced in the corner of her vision, creeping across her eyes. Her lungs burned, and only then did she realise that she'd been holding her breath. The world tilted beneath her. She opened her mouth but no sound came out. No words, no voice. Not the terror she felt crushing her heart.

"I'm sorry, Glo." Hop sounded far away. "I really am."

She shook her head slowly in disbelief. Eyes wide and unseeing, nothing made sense. She didn't see Hop move, hadn't noticed it, until he was right beside her, touching her shoulder gently. She let out a breath, a silent gasp.

"What… what do I do…?" Gloria asked. The words barely made a sound on her lips. If Hop hadn't been at her side, he wouldn't have heard her. Waves of heat built behind her eyes, blurring her vision with tears as panic took hold once again.

"What do you want to do?" Hop asked.

She closed her eyes as tears began to fall.

Nothing. She wanted to do nothing. She wanted to curl up into a ball and disappear. Forget everything that happened. Forget that she-

She'd kissed Bede. Somehow, under the influence of alcohol, all her inhibitions had been swept away. All her fear had been reduced to dust. Somehow, her feelings for Bede had broken through.

A sob escaped Gloria's lips as she crumbled. Beneath the weight of her fear, she cried. Even though she couldn't remember it happening, she couldn't remember kissing Bede, she wished she could forget.

She wanted to forget it all.

"He knows," Gloria said in a broken whisper. She stole a breath, opening her eyes and rubbing away the tears on her cheeks. "There's no way he doesn't. Not after I… did that to him."

Hop gave her shoulder a comforting squeeze. "You don't know that for sure! You were drunk, remember? Bede might just think you kissed him on impulse!"

"Which is probably what happened," Gloria huffed. Then it hit her. "Oh, Arceus. What if I told him that I- that I like him…?"

Even saying that much made her wince. Admitting her feelings out loud left a vile taste in her mouth, and the very thought that she might have told Bede how she felt while drunk sent a ripple of terror through her body. The gap in her memory threatened to swallow her whole.

"Hey, don't think about the worst case scenario," Hop said, "and look, even if you did tell him, you've got an excuse! You were drunk."

"You don't turn into a completely different person when drunk, Hop." She shrugged off his attempt to reassure her. "It's bad enough that I… kissed him. But if I told him how I felt as well… no amount of excuses or backtracking will save me now."

Gloria exhaled heavily, deflating in her chair as if all her strength, all her willpower, had fled her body with her sigh. Her insides were twisted and jumbled, chest uncomfortably crawling with nerves.

"What am I supposed to do…?" she asked. There was no way forward for her, no way out of this. She was trapped.

"Call him," Hop said with a shrug. Gloria balked at him with an unappreciative stare. "You're gonna have to face Bede sooner or later," he reminded her. "May as well get it over and done with."

Gloria turned away from him. Hop was right, but that didn't help the rolling waves of nausea in the pit of her stomach, nor the dread hanging above her head like a guillotine ready to drop. She reached for her phone and paused.

She didn't want to do this. She didn't want to face Bede or her mistakes. How could she, when she despised the person that love - mixed with alcohol - turned her into? Gloria clenched her jaw and picked up her phone, focusing on the bead of disgust that burned in her stomach and the pain it caused. Love was vile. It corrupted. It fueled jealousy, fed delusions, made her see things that weren't there. Made her question herself- and her friendships.

And it left her vulnerable.

There was no point in waiting any longer. Gloria dialed Bede's number without another thought. She straightened in her chair, ignoring the surprise on Hop's face as he took a seat beside her, and listened to the ringing. Despite her determination to get this over and done with, nerves sparked to life in her chest. Her heart pounded. She jumped when a click sounded, and a sudden rush of warmth flooded her veins as Bede spoke into her ear.

"Hey, Gloria." His smooth voice washed over her, and for a moment, she forgot how to speak. "You got home in one piece, I assume? How are you feeling?"

Like her heart was in her throat.

"Not- Not too bad," Gloria said, "I slept most of it off, just got a mild headache now." She breathed a sheepish laugh as her mind spun, and tried to swallow the giddy feeling building inside her. A simple phone call was all it took for her walls to crumble, for her feelings to take over, for her to fluster at the sound of his voice.

Love. It turned her into someone she didn't recognise.

And that made her sick.

"Y-You said you wanted to talk?" she asked, trying to shove aside the flustered, love-struck side of herself, and felt the disgust still burning a hole through her stomach once again. The sharp sensation of pain flooded her mind with clarity. Heaviness returned to her gut. Regret, mixed with fear. A reminder of what she had done to him.

"I did," Bede said after a pause. "Although, I would rather we spoke in person. Are you busy right now?"

Gloria swallowed. She felt cold. Her nerves froze in place, trepidation seizing her heart.

Somehow, she remembered to answer him, remembered how to speak. "No, I'm free."

"Good. I'll come by soon, then."

Gloria closed her eyes, accepting her fate. Steeling herself to fight back tears. "Okay," she said. "I'll… see you soon."

"Bye, Gloria."

She hated - and loved - the way he said her name.

Gloria hung up without saying anything more. Hop watched her expectantly as she placed her phone on the table, and her heart sank into the pit of her stomach.

"He'll be here soon," she said. The dramatic shift in her emotions, from giddiness at Bede's voice to the hollow ache in her heart that she felt now, sapped the strength from her bones.

Hop kept watching her, his eyes searching her face. The concern in his eyes made her heart clench.

"I'll be fine," she said, though she didn't believe it. She stood from her chair, getting up to dump the rest of her soggy cereal into the sink. Her appetite was long gone.

"I know," Hop said quietly. "But you always say that."

Gloria felt his eyes on her back, knew the painful expression he wore. She breathed in slowly, before turning to face him with a smile. Hop's concern was so genuine, so heartfelt, that it threatened to shatter the mask she'd built to protect herself.

"I'll be fine," she said again. Firmer this time.

Hop's expression didn't change, and Gloria left him there as she retreated into her room, in part to change out of her pyjamas, but also because she couldn't bear to lie any further to Hop when he looked at her like that.

Minutes passed like hours. When Gloria spied movement on the street outside, she shot to her feet, yanking open the front door before Bede could knock. Nerves twisted inside her gut as she forced herself to smile. Keenly aware that Hop was watching her.

"Hey, Bede!" Gloria said, slipping out the door around his side, tugging the door closed behind her. "Why don't we go for a walk?"

She didn't give him much of a choice in the matter as she strode down the garden path and onto the street. Driven by nerves, her heart pounded in her chest like she'd sprinted to Wedgehurst and back. She wanted to run. To bolt again. Relationships, feelings, dealing with emotions like these was like trying to juggle handfuls of jelly. Scrambling to keep it from sliding through her fingers.

Gloria flashed Bede a smile, as bright as she could muster, as he stepped down the path towards her. This wasn't a battle she could fight, not a foe she could conquer with her Pokemon. She was on her own.

"You appear to have a lot of energy for someone with a hangover," Bede said, lifting an eyebrow at her.

His voice made her heart skip. "You should've seen me earlier," Gloria said. She hid the tension in her body behind her smile, behind her laughter. "I felt like I'd been barrelled over by a Wooloo!"

She started down the street, away from her house and the Slumbering Weald. Bede fell into step with her, and she stared straight ahead, not even daring to glance at him. The space between them felt infinitesimal. She sped up slightly, shoving her hands into the pockets of her shorts so there was no chance their hands would accidentally brush, and Bede remained at her side, matching her pace.

"There's a nice spot down here by the lake," Gloria said. She turned abruptly and marched through the knee-high grass. Skwovet scattered into the trees, Rookidee fluttering away into the clear skies above. A Chewtle turned slowly as she passed it, mouth hanging open. If Bede wanted to talk about the very thing she dreaded, she wanted to be away from the public, away from Wedgehurst, away from Hop. The building tension inside her chest left the threat of tears in her eyes, and she swallowed thickly. She clenched her jaw, blinking hard. She couldn't cry now. Not when nothing had happened yet. But she felt like she was hanging by a thread. A split second, a single word away, from falling.

Bede caught up to her as she headed down a dirt path that wove away from Sonia's house, leading towards the lake. By the waters edge stood a single wooden bench, facing out across the shimmering surface of the lake. Wind rustled through the thick grass, a myriad of Pokemon calls filling the silence. Gloria swept towards the bench and plonked herself down on it unceremoniously. She sat - deliberately - as close to the edge of the bench as she could, leaving the majority of it empty. For this conversation, she wanted as much space between her and Bede as possible. Enough space for her to breathe, to think.

Whether Bede noticed how she'd seated herself or not, he gave no indication. He sat what would have normally been a comfortable distance away, and Gloria fought down the urge to stiffen at his proximity. Although it was only Bede with her, she felt like a thousand eyes were watching her every movement. Watching the way she breathed, shallow and tense. Noticing the tension in her posture. She couldn't hide here, not from Bede. When he turned to face her, her expression froze. He looked away.

And Gloria could no longer breathe. Words caught on her tongue, lodged in her throat. Her heart cantered away in her chest, faster and faster as seconds of silence ticked by. Her lips parted, but nothing came out. No sound, no air, as if an invisible vice had tightened around her throat.

"Elliott has been dealt with," Bede said, finally breaking the hold that the silence had on Gloria. "So you needn't worry about him any longer."

Elliott? Her gut churned at the mention of his name. She found herself straightening, confusion and curiosity drawing her gaze to Bede.

"What do you mean?" Gloria asked. "What happened?"

Bede, thankfully, kept looking out across the lake. "Ms Opal is acquainted with his father," he said, "and called in a few favours. From what I've heard, he's been stripped of multiple privileges, including his position at his father's company, and will be sent to his uncle's estate in Kalos for the foreseeable future."

Gloria blinked for a moment, stunned. "You mean he's…?"

"Gone." Bede nodded. "He'll be too preoccupied with mopping up his own scandal to cause any more with you. His father and Ms Opal made sure of that."

The tension Gloria had been holding in her chest fled all at once, and she sank into the bench in disbelief.

"I… thank you," she managed to say. It took a few seconds for Gloria to collect herself enough to speak properly. "You didn't have to do that for me… Ms Opal, too. I-I don't know what to say."

"'Thank you' suffices," Bede said, looking at her with a satisfied smile.

Her heart skittered. "Thank you," she said breathlessly. Their eyes met and Hop's voice echoed in her mind.

"You kissed him."

Panic returned. Gloria's heart lurched high up into her throat, her blood running cold. She cut her gaze away from Bede as crushing fear pressed down on her shoulders, on her lungs. The silence between them was deafening.

"Gloria, I wanted to-"

"I'm sorry!" The words stole from Gloria's throat on the back of a sob. Vision blurring with tears. "Hop- Hop told me what happened," she continued, fingers pressing against her lips to stop them from trembling, to stop her from sobbing again. "He told me what- what I did. To you." Her eyes closed in shame. Tears spilled down her cheeks as she took a deep, shaky breath. Fear was crushing her heart. "I'm so sorry," she said as a whisper. Faint and broken. "I was drunk and… and I don't even remember it. I'm sorry. I'm really, really sorry."

Gloria shuddered as she exhaled, feeling that pieces of her soul had broken away and fled with her breath.

"Please-" It caught on her tongue. "I just… don't want you to hate me…"

Bede straightened. "Why would I hate you?"

"Because I kissed you, Bede!" She turned to him, vision blurring with tears, facing her fears. "I forced myself on to you when you were just- just trying to help me, and… I did something so despicable to you…"

Again, she turned away. Closed her eyes and let the tears fall.

"I don't hate you for that," Bede said quietly. "Although I must admit I am a tad… confused."

Gloria swept the tears from her eyes with the backs of her hands, her breath hot in her throat, and looked at him. Bede stared at his hands in his lap, fingers woven together. His brow was furrowed ever-so-slightly in thought.

"Why did you kiss me?" he asked. His voice, as soft as the wind caressing his platinum blond curls, left Gloria numb.

She opened her mouth, finding she had no voice. She swallowed. Looked away. "I-I was drunk and I… don't actually remember k-kissing you, so… I don't know."

The gap in her memory of that night tightened the hold that fear had on her, like a string of razor wire wrapped around her heart. Piercing her flesh with every breath. It hurt to speak.

"You told me once that you'd only kiss someone you had feelings for," Bede continued, "and yet, last night you kissed-"

"-Don't." She saw nothing. Felt nothing.

Nothing but fear.

"Please." It was a plea. A desperate cry that escaped the hollow of her throat. "Please don't- don't say that. Don't ask me that. I can't-"

Tears. She felt them on her cheeks. Felt Bede's eyes on her.

"I can't…" her voice broke. Gloria shook her head, pressed her palms to her eyes, and blocked it out. She blocked everything out and shut down. Broken gasps escaped through her clenched teeth, each breath making her body shudder with agony. She curled into herself. Dug her elbows into her thighs as she doubled over. A gentle touch on her shoulder made her wince, and Bede took his hand back in an instant.

His touch had burned.

"I'm… sorry." Gloria barely heard Bede speak through the darkness encasing her mind. "I won't say anything more."

The regret in his voice hurt more than anything else. Gloria tried to steel herself, to fight back her tears and push through her fear, as a rush of shame surged through her chest.

She was the one who'd kissed him. She was the one who'd gotten drunk and forced herself on him. Didn't he deserve answers for that?

Gloria pulled her palms off her eyes and sat up straight, blinking up at the sky above in order to dry her tears. She sucked in a breath, then another, forcefully controlling how she exhaled. Slowly, slowly, easing the fear off her heart. Bede sat in silence beside her. Respectfully, he kept his gaze elsewhere as Gloria calmed herself down. When she felt as though she could finally speak, she laughed instead. That made Bede look at her in surprise.

"You know, everyone's always making a fuss about their 'first kiss,' making it out to be this big thing, something important," Gloria said with a rueful smile. "All that build up, and I can't even remember it." She shook her head, laughing quietly. Regret tainting her voice. "Can we just… forget this ever happened?" Gloria turned to look at Bede, trying hard to smile through the pain.

Bede's expression shifted as he met her eyes. There was worry, regret, and something more to the depth of his eyes as he mulled over her words.

"I'm not sure I can forget it that easily," he said.

The smile on Gloria's face threatened to break. She nodded slowly. "Yeah, I… I thought that would be the case…" She looked away from him. "Was that… was that your first…?"

"It was."

Gloria pursed her lips to stop them trembling. "I'm- I'm really sorry…"

"It's not a big deal," he said, shrugging half-heartedly. "It's just a kiss."

Gloria scoffed. "That's easy for you to say, I don't even remember it! It's like I haven't had my first kiss at all." She slumped on the back of the bench with a huff. "It would've been better if I did remember it, since then my first kiss would be over and done with and I wouldn't have to worry about it. I don't even know what it's like to- to kiss someone…"

She trailed off, remembering that she had, in fact, kissed Bede, even though she had no actual recollection of it. She let out a heavy sigh. Of course she'd kiss the one person she'd fallen for in her entire life and be unable to remember it happening.

"It's honestly not all it's cracked up to be," Bede said. "Really, if you think about it, all kissing is, is two people pressing their mouths together. The significance placed on kissing is out of proportion to the act itself."

Gloria curled her lips in frustration at him. "Says the one who can remember it," she huffed. "It's like I haven't had my first kiss at all…"

"But you have," Bede said. "You kissed me."

"W-Well, yeah." She blinked at him, nerves fluttering around her chest at how matter-of-factly he'd said that. "It just… seems a bit unfair that I had my first kiss and can't remember it, so it's like I've still got that importance attached to it."

She wasn't making much sense. She couldn't think straight with Bede's eyes on her, when talking about this. About kissing.

She'd really kissed him. That alone was astounding, it was difficult to believe. But it had happened. Gloria had kissed Bede. She curled a lock of her hair behind her ear as she tried to push those thoughts away, feeling her cheeks begin to burn.

"I kinda feel like I've missed out here," she said to fill the silence. Gloria laughed sheepishly, aiming to lift the awkward air between her and Bede. When she looked at him, her eyes immediately flicked to his lips.

She looked away quickly.

"Do you want to know what it's like?" Bede's voice washed over her like soft ribbons of silk, each word stealing the air from her lungs. "You said you'd rather get your first kiss over and done with…"

Somehow, Gloria managed to peek over at him. The depth of his eyes stirred something inside her. Something warm, something that built in the pit of her stomach and flooded her veins.

"I…" She struggled to remember how to speak. "I mean, since I've technically already had my first kiss, it would be better to, y'know, get it over and done with so I don't have to worry about it anymore. Just- Just so I know what it's like." Gloria cleared her throat. Her eyes kept flicking towards his lips, yet it was harder to hold his gaze when he was looking at her like that. In a way she couldn't describe. "But- well, who knows when that will happen," she continued quickly with an awkward laugh. "Or if it ever will."

"Do you want to?"

Gloria gaped at him. For a moment, she wasn't sure that she heard him correctly.

"Do- Do I want to… what?" she asked. Her voice was quiet. Barely louder than a breath.

Bede seemed closer to her than before. His gaze was captivating, and she couldn't look anywhere else but into his eyes, as though trapped by those deep, alluring violets. Bede seemed immune to whatever hold Gloria was under, searching her eyes for a moment in silence.

"If you'd rather get your first kiss over and done with," Bede said, "I could kiss you."

She felt his words against her lips. Heat consumed every fibre of her body, and she couldn't breathe. Her mouth dropped open, fumbling over her words, scrambling for a way to answer him.

Did she want to-?

"I… but you…?" Her mind was addled. Her lungs felt like they were full of helium, filled to the brim with too much air. Was he really offering to…?

"You've already kissed me," Bede reminded her. His tone was light, and without accusation. Merely staring a fact. "And since you don't remember what it was like, if you want, I can show you. You've had your first kiss- all I'll do is repeat it."

How could she answer him? Gloria had her hands clenched tightly together in her lap, unable to find any words. It didn't feel real. All she could do was nod. Something shifted in Bede's eyes. His gaze softened, deepened, and Gloria startled when he trailed his fingers across her cheek.

"Tell me to stop," Bede said, his voice soft yet lower than before, "if you don't want this."

Gloria found herself nodding again, though she couldn't think straight. She felt his knees brush against hers. His fingers wove into her hair.

"This- This won't change anything between us, right?" she asked quickly. She sounded far away, distant and strangely light.

Bede's answer dusted across her lips. "Not if you don't want it to."

He was close enough that looking into his eyes made her dizzy, noses almost brushing. Their breaths mingled together in the shortening distance between them.

"Close your eyes," Bede said, and she obeyed instinctively. Her eyes fluttered shut the second he kissed her. A quiet gasp died in her throat. Her mind span. She leant into him, against him, as he slowly melded his lips against hers.

And oh, she knew she shouldn't be doing this, she shouldn't be kissing him like this, but the warmth of his kiss took hold of her in an instant, and everything else fell away. Her fear, her regret, nothing else mattered to her in that moment. She forgot to breathe. Forgot her inhibitions. The sensation of Bede's lips gliding over hers was all she could feel. How could he say that kissing didn't live up to the hype when it felt like this? Like she was walking on air, floating, giddy and breathless. Even though she didn't know what she was doing, she followed each and every movement of Bede's lips with her own. She was putty in his hands, melting against his lips. Melting into him. The softest moan spilled from her throat as Bede suddenly broke away from her, leaving her stunned. She blinked in a daze. The world was fuzzy around her. Her lips tingled with a sensation she'd never felt before, warmth pooling low in her gut.

It was like waking from a dream. Bede cleared his throat, turning to face the lake, while Gloria's mind began to slowly work again. Clarity hit her in an instant. Then embarrassment. Like a clap of thunder, it jolted her alert, and she flushed. Her fingers touched her lips, unable to comprehend what had just happened. What they'd just done.

Gloria could still feel Bede's lips against hers, so warm and gentle, featherlight yet firm. He'd kissed her.

Bede had-

Arceus. There was no going back now.

"Was that… sufficient?" Bede asked, needing to say something, anything, to break the heated silence suffocating him. He didn't dare look towards Gloria, knowing fully well that he mirrored the blush that burned across her cheeks.

Gloria jumped at the sound of his voice. "Y-Yes, it- it was," she managed to reply.

"That's… good." He cringed internally at how strained and tight his voice sounded. Gloria appeared stunned, unable to stay focused on anything around them as she glanced from him to the lake, to her hands in her lap, and then off to the path they'd followed to get here.

Bede took a breath and tried to calm the racing thoughts in his mind. He'd kissed her. Somehow, his desires had gotten the best of him and he'd offered to kiss her, and Gloria had agreed to it. He'd kissed Gloria becaused she'd let him.

Gloria, who refused to fall in love, who'd sworn she'd never kiss someone she wasn't dating, had agreed to let him kiss her so she knew what it was like.

It was like Bede's insides had been turned upside down and back to front. He was in disbelief, in shock, wondering again and again if that had really happened. All it took was a single glance towards Gloria, and he had his answer. Their eyes met and her whole body twitched. Her blush doubled in intensity, mouth dropping open, her gaze flicking to his lips for a split second before she deliberately looked elsewhere. Heat trickled down Bede's spine at her reaction.

Arceus. Who knew he'd ever have this affect on her? He could still feel a memory of Gloria's lips against his, and his heart skipped as she, again, touched her fingertips to her lips.

"Gloria," Bede began, and she jolted, spinning to face him.

"Y-Yes?" she squeaked loudly.

Bede fought the giddy smile off his face, smothering the rush of pride he felt at gaining such a delightful reaction from her.

"Nothing needs to change between us," he continued, "like you said. Alright?"

Gloria nodded emphatically. "O-Of course!" Her eyes remained wide, her expression stunned, and it made Bede smile. Warmth towards her blossomed in his chest.

"Now do you see what I mean when I said it would be hard to forget?" he teased.

"Mm…" She pressed her lips together, looking away quickly. Her gaze was distant and forceful, as though she was tossing over something in her mind. He longed to ask her, to delve into whatever it was that had her so torn, but the way she'd fractured before him when he asked why she'd kissed him made him push his questions aside.

The wound of Gloria's that he'd thought had healed into a scar was still raw. It ran deep.

No, Bede was a fool to have assumed otherwise. She was still protecting herself. Building up walls in a desperation Bede had felt himself long ago. Like a wounded Pokemon, cowering at the slightest noise, he knew why she reacted the way she did.

After a moment, Gloria managed to look at him and hold his gaze. He offered up a smile as he stood.

"Shall we head back?" he asked, holding out a hand to her. A gesture of goodwill. Of hope, that things were still the same between them.

Gloria looked at his hand, her eyes widening a fraction, before she took it. The smile she gave him was warm, as though she'd untangled whatever it was she'd been struggling with a few moments earlier. Her hand fit snugly in his, and she gave it a squeeze.

"Let's go," she said.

Bede knew in that instant that, although they'd assured each other the opposite, something had, indeed, changed between them.

#bederia week 2021 #bede #gloria #dressedinpinkshipping #bederia #btyu #my writing

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johannstutt413 · 3 years

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(requested by calligomiles; continuing from this)

Grani yawned as she walked into her mini-precinct, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes as she did. Who would’ve thought that she’d stay up so late with Natal- yo, why was there someone already in cuffs?

Jackie gestured to the black-haired Ursus in question. “Caught ‘er gettin’ in a fistfight with a bouncer, so I brought ‘er in. You know her, Officer Grani?”

“I know her friends,” the Kuranta said reflexively, even tired recognizing the style of her outfit. “Leto, right?”

“That’s me, yup~” The Ursus hiccup, clearly intoxicated.

The Perro cracked her knuckles. “Well, I’m gonna head back out there since you’re here. Have a good one, Grani!”

“You, too, Jackie!” She plucked a proper amount of cheer from her endless-but-a-little-frozen reserve, fist-bumping her on the way out, before stumbling over to the coffee machine. “Want a cup, Leto?”

“Eh? Cup’o’what?”

The mountee showed her the bag of coffee in her hand. “Coffee?”

“Ohhhh. Yeaaaah.” The halberdier yawned and hiccuped at the same time. “Heh. Weird~”

“Jackie means well, but she’s got some things to learn about the force still. Rule number one: stay with your charges until they’re processed. Rule number two: it’s way too early for this.” Still, Grani couldn’t help but smile. She’d done good work bringing a belligerent drunk like Leto in by herself.

Things were (mostly) quiet until they were both sitting down, uncuffed and drinking coffee in the row of chairs in the ‘waiting’ area of the mini-precinct. “So, uh...you gonna charge me with anything?”

“Nah. I think you learned your lesson already, right?” The Kuranta had completely dethawed by this point, the caffeine picking her up to her usual level of energy. “Why were you fighting a bouncer, anyway?”

“I showed him my ID, and he said I couldn’t go in. Thing is, when I was with the girls earlier last night, he did. That’s discriminating, itn’t it?”

Grani snorted. “Leto, it’s three in the morning.”

“...Oh, yeah.” Rosalind blushed. “That’d do it, huh?”

“Yep. Why were you trying to get beer at three in the morning, anyway?” It’s not like it would’ve helped with the honey-hangover, after all.

She shrugged. “Didn’t have any in my fridge, and the honey Bee brought home was the red stuff, so it was keepin’ me up. Still needa get to bed pretty soon.”

“Yeah, if you’ve been up this long, you really should...Tell you what: I’ve got something at my place that’ll help knock you out. You can crash on the couch until the meeting tonight.” The officer could tell the Doctor what’d happened if someone went looking for her.

“Really?” The Ursus finished her cup with one final long, slow drink. “That’s so nice of ya. Thanks.”

Why did she have a sudden urge to ruffle her hair? “No problem, Leto. Let’s get you to sleep.”

“Cool...It’s Razz, by the way.”

“Huh.” Grani helped her up, setting their empty cups in one of the chairs for clean-up later. “That’s kinda neat, your name and Rosa’s codename sounding kinda similar.”

Leto thought about it for a second before chuckling. “I ‘adn’t even noticed, really. Grani and Gummy are kinda close, too. When are you gonna join the Group, huh?”

“Oh, today. The General invited me.” What was that, sixteen hours from now?

“Really really?” The halberdier sobered up even more hearing that. “How’d ya manage that one?”

The Kuranta chuckled. “It’s kinda a long story now, honestly. I guess we’ve got time though.” And so, Grani explained it all - talking to Rada a while back, the Doctor asking her to make friends with Natalya, sparring with the General that afternoon and going to Rosa’s place that night. It was a long enough story, with Leto’s occasional laughs and oohs and awws, that by the time they got back to her room they were both properly awake.

“Man, and now I’ve gotta sleep after hearing all this? I’m blamin’ you for my dreams, Gran-gran.” Rosalind rolled onto the cou- holy shit, did she ever use this thing? It was almost brand new!

“Gran-gran?” The officer pouted as she went to the kitchen. “I’m only a little older than you. Still better than ‘Tiny’.”

That sent the halberdier chuckling. “You’re barely taller than Anna, though!”

“L-look, I said a little older, didn’t I?” Grani sighed, pouring her signature ‘go-the-fuck-to-sleep’ drink into a small cup.

“I guess. And I mean, the General’s pretty tall for our age, anyway, isn’t she?” Rosalind shrugged to herself. “Taller than me, anyway.”

The officer set the cup on her coffee table. “There you go. Drink that, and you’ll wake up eight hours later feeling fresh as daisies.”

“Thanks...Say, ya gotta pillow I could borrow?”

“Oh! Sorry, I don’t.” The Kuranta sighed. “I don’t use this couch, and the only pillow I’ve got is...uh...”

Leto chuckled. “It’s fine, it’s fine. Take a seat for a minute.” She downed the drink like a shot.

“Eh? Razz, you don’t have to-” And with that, the halberdier was out like a light...her head falling into Grani’s lap back-first.

“Razz...I’ve gotta go back to work.” Nothing. Grani sighed, looking at the clock before starting to stroke the Ursus’ hair. “That’s alright; I’ve got some time. Sometime, you’re gonna have to tell me why it’s so hard for you to fall asleep...you and the rest of the Group, too. For now, though? I guess Podenco’s honey-lavender tea did its job.”

About thirty minutes later, the Kuranta gently lifted Leto’s head so she could run to her room, get the stuffed bear Rada and her had won at a fair a couple of weeks ago, give it to the sleeping halberdier as a pillow, all before dashing off to the precinct once again. Busy, busy horsey...but a very happy one, all the same.

#arknights #arknights fic #leto (arknights)#grani (arknights)#the timeline for this is kinda weird #i forgot I'd already done a Grani/Rosa and that calligo i guess rolled that into this universe since #which is gonna make linking them even more fun lol #but the pay-off is gonna be soooo good #...i bet

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skylarmoon71 · 3 years

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Leonardo x Reader- Oneshot (Fanfiction)

You were the type of person that could jam out to any kind of song, as long as it had a catchy beat. Music was always your number one love, so whenever you had a chance, you would be banging out to whatever genre you felt like. Mikey was somewhat the same. He'd introduced you to so many amazing songs, and you returned the favor. That's why the boys were never surprised when they saw you with a pair of airpods, bobbing your head as you hit the punching bag.

"You're supposed to be focused (Y/N)." you saw his lips moving when he came into view, but you couldn't make out the words. You blushed when you felt Leo's eyes on you. You always tried to avoid singing or dancing around Leo. The rest of his brothers, you didn't mind, but when his sapphire orbs landed on you, your nerves would go crazy. "I-I know Raph I just got bored so I thought why not." you weren't a big fighter, but you did pay attention when they practiced, so you picked up a few things. You honestly thought the lair would be free for the next hour since they were on patrol. Your eyes drifted to the watch and you gasped softly. "Oh crap I didn't realize it was this late. " you grabbed your bag, pulling out your phone to check for notifications. Because you were enjoying your session so much, you completely lost track of time. "I gotta get going, I'll see you later guys." Mikey grinned, waving happily and the rest of them smiled as you paced out of the room.

"Have you guys ever heard her sing?" Leo was curious, because he thought for sure he'd at least hear you once, since you almost always had headphones on.

"Of course dude she's really good!" Mikey replied, dropping on the couch. He kicked his feet up, stretching, and Leo's forehead creased.

"Really?"

Raph shot Leo a look. "With the way you're always staring at her I'm surprised you missed it. "

"I-I don't stare at her!" Leo defended. Donnie cleared his throat, "You uhh, kind of do."

"You look like a puppy chasing a bone. " Mikey interjected.

Leo didn't reply, just headed for his room.

~~~

Baby, Jerry-Jerry, mmm (Ah; hol' up, ah)

El tiempo contigo me pasa corriendo, oh

Hacemos el amor todo el fin de de semana

Y siempre me quedo con gana'

Supongamo' que no hay nadie más que toque tu piel (Uh)

Que no existe él

Leo's eyes opened, distracted by the melody that filtered through the hall. He followed the noise, a little bit confused. No one was ever in the dojo this early, except for maybe him. He was positive his brothers were all asleep. It was seven in the morning.

Imagínate en mi cuarto comiéndote a beso' (Yeah)

Como en los viejo' tiempo', qué rico sería eso (Uh; uh-no)

Imagínate en mi cuarto comiéndote a beso' (Ah; ah)

Como en los viejo' tiempo', qué rico sería eso, baby (Na-na-na), eh

As he got closer, he could make out a female voice, and the song definitely wasn't english. He turned the corner, and the sight of you bent over made his breath catch. He averted his eyes nervously. Not expecting it. You must have dropped something, because when you straightened, you went back to humming, gripping the broom handle and continuing your task. Leo had no idea why, but he was sort of hiding behind the door.

No' peleamo' y arreglamo' (Arreglamo')

En eso siempre estamo' (Estamo')

Desde que no' conocemo' (Uh-uh-uh-uh)

Pero siempre lo hacemo' bueno

Si tú quiere', no' grabamo' (-bamo')

Y despué' lo posteamo' (No, no)

Pa' que todo el mundo vea (Vea)

Lo cabrón que la pasamo'

His eyes widened. He almost couldn't believe it. He heard the man in the background, but the distinct sound of your voice is what grabbed his attention. It was so soothing. And the words were slipping off your tongue easily. He had no idea you could even speak another language. He was in a daze, he moved from his spot unconsciously, watching you guide over the floor in glee, enjoying the lyrics almost as much as he loved hearing them.

-OH CRAP!"

Leo jolted at your yell. You dropped the broom in surprise. That's when he realized his sudden entrance probably startled you. "Sorry, I should have said something. " You looked down at your shoes, embarrassed. "I can't believe he heard me."

"Ugh! I'm sorry Leo, I just wanted to clean the dojo for you guys before you woke up, and I got a little bored so I turned on some music. I must have sounded like a cat getting murdered, I'm really sorry if I disturbed you. " he shook his head frantically, stepping closer to you. "Are you kidding me, your voice is amazing. "

Did he really think so? You nibbled on your lower lip. Leo was a nice guy, of course he would say that.

"You don't have to say that..just to make me feel better." He placed his hand on your shoulders, capturing your full attention.

"I'm not. Honestly (Y/N), you have an incredible voice." The song switched, and when you recognized what was now playing, your eyes looked away nervously.

I don't know, it's just something about ya

Got me feeling like I can't be without ya

Anytime someone mention your name

I be feeling as if I'm around ya

Ain't no words to describe you baby

All I know is that you take me high

Can you tell that you drive me crazy?

'Cause I can't get you out my mind

You forgot that your music was on shuffle. You knew Leo registered the words playing, and for some reason, it conveyed how you felt about him perfectly. His hands were still resting on your shoulders. He looked like he didn't want to move away, and you didn't want him to. Music has always been your way of conveying what you felt. So maybe this time, it was exactly what you needed. When the other verse started, you sang along, not breaking eye contact this time.

Thinkin' of ya when I'm goin' to bed

When I wake up think of ya again

You are my homie, lover and friend

Exactly why

You light me up inside

Like the 4th of July

Whenever your around

I always seem to smile

And people ask me how

Well your the reason why

I'm dancing in the mirror and singing in the shower

Leo could only watch in amazement at your confession. His heart was hammering beneath his plastron. He could barely believe what he was hearing. You were glowing as the words flowed from you effortlessly.

Don't care what others say

If I got you I'm stray

You bring my heart to life yeah

You light me up inside

Like the fourth of July

Whenever your around

I always seem to smile

And people ask me how

Well your the reason why

I'm dancing in the mirror and singing in the shower

You smiled with every punctuated word. Leo was staring at you with so much unfiltered adoration. You were mostly shocked you hadn't gone into cardiac arrest yet. You were constantly careful around Leo, but now it felt like you didn't have to be.

"You got me singing in the shower.." you whispered. Leo smiled, his hand resting gently on your cheek. When he took that last step forward, you melted, folding into his arms when he pulled you forward, kissing you. Goosebumps rose on your skin, and stood unto your toes, desperate to match his height and delve into the heavenly feel of his touch. Leo was slow with his kisses, and gentle. It did wonders to you. Your stomach was in literal knots.

"Leo.."

If you thought this was how he'd react to your singing, you would have done it ages ago. Thank the heavens for your vocals.

When he pulled back, he was smiling like a kid. "So, are you going to tell me what the lyrics mean?" he asked. You blinked, still in a daze from the kiss.

"What?"

He laughed. "The lyrics to the song earlier, you really getting into it. I'm curious." you flushed.

"Oh..." Explaining this was embarrassing since it was pretty sexual.

"I-I uhh, It's..."

Leo titled his head. "It can't be that bad." he encouraged. If only he knew. "I-It's about making love..." it was said so quietly, and when he registered what you said, his eyes grew wide. "O-Oh!" The both of you were still standing pretty close, and you swore your skin heated up. You remembered when the video popped up in your recommendations a few weeks ago. When you watched it, you couldn't help but imagine yourself in that situation with Leo. His hands touching you sensually.

"Have you ever thought of me that way.." He shouldn't have asked, but he couldn't help it. The moment you said it he could see your expression change. Something was definitely there. You clench your fists at the question, taken aback by his bold question. Was it okay to tell him you'd wanted him for longer than he even realized. "I have." you admit. You were really confessing a lot today. "Have you?" it was his turn to confess. His eyes drifted. "N-No, mainly because I never thought there was a chance that you could..that we would be.." he was tripping over his words, but you understood. He might have held feelings for you, but he never crossed the line out of respect. "I guess now it's okay then, if you want to say anything, do anything.." you whisper. Leo got exactly what you were insinuating.

"There's a lot I want to do to you (Y/N)."

"Please do!" your mind responded immediately, you refrained from saying it aloud. You'd just recently figured out your feelings.

"But I think for now it's best we take it slow. We have plenty of time to explore that. " He leaned closer to your ear, pressing a soft kiss just beneath your jaw.

"To explore each other.."

"Bloody hell." How did he expect you to take it slow when he was saying stuff like that.

"O-Okay." Leo grinned, satisfied with your red cheeks. He liked the way you responded to him. It gave him a weird sense of power. He supposed it was the same power you had over him.

"I think I'm in love with you (Y/N)." He had time to tell you that too, there was no rush. When the time was right, he would.

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blissedoutphil · 4 years

Text

Dan the Personal Assistant Part 12

Dan has to submit an application video to be an assistant for a company President, Mr. Lester. But what happens when he accidentally sends a wrong video?

Back within 2 months as promised! :P but wow Dan is finally more active than me now

4570 words of angst? idk

~Part 11~

or read on ao3!

Frank shook his head as he glanced at his watch again. Phil missed the meeting entirely and didn’t even bother filling him in on what he should do to cover for his absence. He took a sip of his coffee and focused back on his presentation slides for the next meeting, which should be Phil’s job but since he wasn’t around, of course it was thrown to the director.

The bell on the coffee shop door rang as a man rushed in, and Frank looked up to see the CEO hurrying to his table. Phil tried to tame his messy hair as he sat across Frank.

“Sorry.”

“It’s too late for that,” Frank huffed, typing away on his laptop.

“I didn’t mean to miss it, I really owe you one,” Phil adjusted his glasses resting crooked on his nose.

“By letting me fuck that boy of yours again?” Frank deadpanned.

“If that’s what you want.”

“I can’t believe I’m saying this, Phil, but I think what I want is him gone,” Frank had been meaning to tell Phil this for a while now.

Phil had seen that coming, but still he felt a pang of sadness.

“I thought you liked him. You agreed to the idea.”

“Yeah but that was before he was suddenly more important than this company, for fuck’s sake.”

“He isn’t,” Phil tried, but knew he wasn’t convincing anyone.

Frank sighed. “I don’t want you to have to step down, you’ve been here from the start. You built this company up to where it is now, and I’m not gonna sit here and watch it all get ruined because of an. An office whore? Do you even like him at all?”

“I-” Phil slumped back in his seat dejectedly, “I thought I did.”

“Why are you letting him control things, Phil? I thought in this kind of arrangements the Dom’s the one in control or whatever.”

Phil looked at Frank, unamused. He didn’t mean for things to have gone this far, and he didn’t know how to put at end to it. Somehow Zack has got Phil wrapped around his finger.

“Can you help me tell him?” Phil asked, hopeful.

“I thought you owe me a favour, not the other way around,” Frank retorted with an annoyed glare.

“I’ll give you a raise. Or more off days. I don’t know, anything!” Phil was getting desperate.

He knew he should end things with Zack, but he was the one who dragged the kid into this situation. To fire him and stop seeing him would be cruel, even if Zack was a terrible assistant and boyfriend. He was too much of a wimp to be the one to break it to the boy.

“Fine,” Frank sighed, unable to bear the sight of Phil in such despair any longer, “I’ll do it. For the sake of my friend.”

Phil smiled at him genuinely, vowing not to get into such a mess like this ever again.

------------

About two years later, Frank found himself in a similar situation despite Phil’s promise. The timid boy staring back at him was worlds apart from Zack, though. He looked like he was terrified that Frank was about to bite him.

He moved past the boy and invited himself into Phil’s room even though the boy told him that Phil was in the shower. Phil had replied his text saying they could meet once he reached the hotel, so technically he could be here.

He eyed the kid, who was standing awkwardly, kind of hunched in on himself. Frank was honestly surprised when he’d seen his boss and this kid in the cafe. Phil never brought Zack along on his overseas trips before. This kid must mean more to him than Zack did.

“Enjoying yourself here?” Frank asked, feeling the awkward energy radiating off of the boy making him start to feel awkward too.

Dan was bewildered that Frank was in their room. He knew that Phil wouldn’t be happy about this, and he dreaded to see Phil get into an even more foul mood. But at the same time, he can’t wait for Phil to get out of the shower and save him from this awkward situation.

“Uhh, yeah so far,” he answered after a beat.

There was no way that Frank didn’t know what he was to Phil, Dan had concluded. He was afraid that Frank would want Phil to get rid of him, especially once he remembered the conversations he’d heard between Frank and Phil months ago. What if he really was being a nuisance, a distraction from the obligations Phil had? It wouldn’t be good even if Phil wanted him here.

The boy was anxiously looking back at the shower every few seconds.

“Don’t worry, if Phil gets mad it’ll be at me, not you. How long does he take to shower, anyway? Jeez.”

Frank moved to sit at the couch, and Dan awkwardly sat at the edge of the chair at the little dining table at the far end of the room only after he sat too.

“Fancy room he got for you,” Frank noted, looking around.

“He must really like you,” he added as an afterthought, wanting to gauge Dan’s reaction.

Dan did not expect that comment, and to his mild horror, he’d started blushing. He hoped it wasn’t noticeable. Frank probably did not mean anything by his comment, but he couldn’t help overthinking it.

Frank did notice the kid looking all bashful. He almost felt bad for the kid. God, Phil better not be leading this poor kid on. He wanted to get straight to the point, but Dan looked like he was going to combust if he spoke another word to him. Zack was never shy around him like this. Even right from their first encounter Zack had always been loud and proud.

“You like being with Phil?” he asked, which he knew was a silly question; the kid wouldn’t be here if he didn’t. But he wanted to hear it from Dan.

Dan wished he’d never opened the door. How the hell was he supposed to answer that? Could he even trust this man when all he makes Phil is angry? He looked warily at the man sitting relaxed on the far end of the room. He remembered Phil telling him that the previous assistant would whore out to everyone in the office. Was Frank expecting the same from him?

If all of Phil’s coworkers were attractive like him and Frank, then Dan honestly wasn’t surprised if the old assistant readily played around with everyone. The man was probably about ten years older than Phil, his hair greying at the sides. But he was still fit for his age, body more toned than Dan’s lanky one had ever been. Dan would be lying if he said he wouldn’t want to tap that.

Not that he actually would, it felt wrong to serve anyone other than Phil.

“Yeah. I-I mean, one of the better jobs I’ve had?” he said, unsure what answer Frank expected.

“So...” the man dragged out, and Dan swallowed, nervous. He really had no clue what Frank was here for. He can’t read Frank’s expressions at all, the man’s face was so stoic. Was he here to tell Phil to get rid of him? To tell him to stop working for Phil? To get in on the action? Dan hoped he was overthinking it all and that maybe he was only here to be nothing but a busybody.

“You like Phil?”

Dan gaped, it was the last thing he’d expected Frank to ask.

Frank knew the kid would be surprised, but he had no time to beat around the bush and he needed to know how this kid felt so that he’d know what direction to lead Phil to.

“I- what?” Dan stuttered.

“I mean is this just a weird ass job or is Phil something more to you?”

Frank chuckled a bit at Dan’s startled stare,“I know I probably sound... invasive or whatever but I can help you talk to him, you know.”

Dan still didn’t know whether to trust the guy. His only memory of him was hearing his angry muffled conversations while hiding in the office months ago, and he didn’t seem keen on Phil having an assistant back then. So why is he offering Dan help now?

“I know Phil. He’s probably head over heels for you but he’s also too scared to tell you. Or me, and maybe himself too.”

“H-how’d you know that?” Dan asked, voice so quiet Frank needed him to repeat his question.

“Well, he brought you here. That’s all I needed to know. He never brought Zack anywhere, and he was on a few trips when that kid was around. Probably what made Zack even more bold to defy him and go around playing with the rest of the office, but eh what’s happened, happened.”

Frank remembered the first time Phil went on a trip without Zack. The boy had been so upset that he practically begged to get in Frank’s pants just to spite Phil. Of course Frank wouldn’t do that to his friend, but that didn’t stop Zack from advancing other staff who were more than willing to use their boss’s boy when the boss wasn’t around.

Frank did what he thought was right and told Phil about the encounter, but Phil seemingly did not mind because it was the agreement they originally had, even though Frank could clearly see that Phil wasn’t keen on that agreement anymore after they officially got together.

“Zack?”

Frank focused his gaze back on Dan, snapping out of the memories.

“Don’t tell me he never told you about the one before you,” Frank said incredulously.

“Oh, he did, but not much. I never even knew his name,” Dan relaxed a bit as Frank opened up, but sat up straight again when he felt the plug still in him. Goddamnit, he should’ve taken the toys out earlier.

“Yeah,” Frank continued, “also Phil missed the staff bonding this morning. Now that, he did a lot when he was with Zack.”

Dan started to feel a bit guilty again. His job was to help Phil relax from work, not distract him from it completely. Frank was probably here because he was done with him taking Phil away from his actual work and wanted Phil to fire him.

“I’m sorry, I’ll try not to be a distraction from his work,” Dan shifted in his seat uncomfortably.

To his surprise, Frank laughed, “Don’t worry kid it’s just a silly staff bonding. But you haven’t answered my question.”

“I... I don’t want things to end up like whatever happened with Zack,” Dan admitted.

Frank realised that Phil probably never told this kid the full story.

“Hey kid, whatever happened back then was all on Zack. Phil met him at a club or something, was taken with him from the start. But the boy was never looking for anything serious, he just wanted to fool around. So they had that whole assistant arrangement thing. I admit I’d egged Phil on to do it at the start, just so I could have in on the action. And Phil let the kid do whatever he wanted, even if he didn’t like it. Anything to make the kid stay; he was that in love.”

Frank rolled his eyes at the memory.

“I started hating the kid when I realised how unfair he was being to Phil. They actually got together as a couple, you know? I guess there were mutual feelings at one point, but he was still fucking around with the staff. Can’t blame the staff because they never knew, Zack made sure he didn’t look like he was exclusively for Phil. I could tell Phil was upset by it, but didn’t do anything because he didn’t want to lose him.”

“Eventually he came to his senses. But he asked me to end it for him,” Frank shook his head.

Dan was listening intently, head swimming with this story he’d always wanted to know.

“But Phil told me he hadn’t meant to fall for Zack? And that Zack left?”

Frank put his hand up, pausing Dan before he was bombarded with more questions. He chuckled at the boy’s curiosity.

“Phil definitely fell for that boy the moment they met. And yeah so I went to speak with Zack like Phil asked, and the boy told me that he’d been wanting to leave anyway. He’d been acting out more to reach Phil’s limits so Phil would call it quits. That scheming brat.”

“Now I don’t know what got into Phil’s head to do this whole ‘assistant’ arrangement again, or how he even found you. If he’d asked me before he did it I would’ve talked him out of it, and maybe that’s why he hid it - you - from me. At first I thought that Phil never learned but I can see that he’s being more careful this time, too careful perhaps. Plus, you’re not at all like Zack.”

Dan bit his lip, glad that it seemed that Phil never mentioned to anyone the video that got him here.

“But I know Phil’s still scared even if he has nothing to be scared of this time around. He’s been my friend long before he was my boss, and I only want to see him happy. No matter the strange things he gets himself into. So I’m asking you because he won’t - does Phil mean something more to you?”

------------------

Phil was spending ages in the shower, standing under the steady stream even though his fingers were already wrinkled. Frank had texted to meet him, and he wanted to delay that as long as he could. His friend was most likely going to give him a lecture about bringing Dan all the way to New York, and he didn’t need that headache. He also didn’t know how to face Dan who was out there waiting for him.

He knew he needed to come clean with Dan about his feelings, but he was just scared. Of what, he wasn’t even sure anymore. Dan was always so willing to do anything for him, with him. He wasn’t sure if it was because he was the boss or if Dan truly wanted to be with him.

Deep down, he knew the answer to that. He stared at the water droplets running down his arms as he finally allowed himself to admit his own feelings, and that they were actually mutual.

Dan couldn’t have been more obvious, he’d have to be blind not to see it.

Still, he didn’t know if he could admit it to the boy. They couldn’t look back if they talked it out, and everything would change. What if Dan also wasn’t prepared?

They still had 2 days left of the trip, what if he’d read all the signals wrong - how would they survive the awkwardness before going home?

He spent some more time in his head until the water flowing down his back started feeling cold. He ran through everything he’d plan to say in his head and finally turned the shower off when he felt confident enough to face Dan. It was now or never. He just couldn’t delay it anymore, he knew Dan was out there waiting for him to talk. He’d just have to face the consequences that would come out of this, whether good or bad.

Things would be awkward enough if he refused to talk about it anyway, he thought as he put on his bathrobe and finally stepped out of the bathroom. And he’d deal with Frank after Dan.

He stepped out to find his boy sitting on the edge of the bed, looking quite shook up. Almost immediately he felt his own nerves make way for worry for Dan.

Before he could ask if he’s alright, Dan spoke up first.

“Um,” Dan said rather nervously, “Frank dropped by.”

“What?” Phil responded, surprised.

“Yeah,” Dan said as he stood up and retrieved his towel, “he said he’ll wait for you by the pool.”

“Did he say anything else?” Phil narrowed his eyes suspiciously.

“No,” Dan replied, but Phil could tell he was lying by the way Dan avoided looking at him.

Dan made to walk past him to the bathroom but Phil caught his arm.

“Hey, I’m- I actually really enjoyed today and I’m sorry it kinda got ruined at the end, I’ll make it quick with whatever Frank wants and then. Can I make it up to you somehow later?”

That was not what Phil spent forty-five minutes in the shower planning, but he hated the thought of Dan being upset at him and just wanted to make him feel better.

Dan actually blinked back tears, making Phil feel worse. He had a feeling that Frank’s little visit to their room caused this. He started to regret leaving the poor boy alone for so long.

“I won’t let Frank disturb you ever,” Phil frowned.

“It’s fine,” Dan managed a small, timid smile, “I really enjoyed today, too. See you later.”

With that, Dan disappeared into the bathroom.

------------

Phil stormed quickly to the pool, wanting to know what exactly Frank said to his boy. Or was Dan really that upset at him from the cafe that he cried while he was in the shower? He couldn’t miss the way Dan’s eyes looked slightly red.

He found his colleague sitting at a small table under an umbrella, people watching.

“What did you say to Dan?” He greeted angrily.

Frank looked up at him with a hint of amusement like he was expecting the anger.

“So were you ever planning to tell me that you love him?” Frank asked calmly.

Phil took a step back in shock at Frank’s blunt statement. But the shock turned to anger in an instant.

“Fuck you!” He swore, upsetting a mother nearby who glared at him as she ushered her daughter away from them.

“Real classy, Phil,” Frank shook his head as he watched the mother hurry away with her child. His sneaky smile was still plastered on his face and Phil wanted to punch it off.

“What did you say,” Phil repeated, “that made him cry?!”

“Are we going to have this conversation properly or are you just gonna be yelling at me the whole time?” Frank asked, gesturing for Phil to sit next to him.

Phil huffed, but he sat.

“If I answer your question will you answer mine?” Frank asked expectantly.

Phil narrowed his eyes but Frank took that as a yes.

“I just asked him what you mean to him,” Frank shrugged.

“Wha-”

“Because,” Frank interrupted him, “I know you. You couldn’t ask him yourself, so I’m just helping you to get on with it. Seriously Phil, were you ever gonna do anything about it if I hadn’t seen y’all at the cafe?”

Phil wanted to blow up at Frank again but he knew Frank was right. His friend knew him all too well. He’d always chickened out and asked Frank for help, and he thought that maybe this one time he could do things on his own. Turns out Frank saw right through him. He sighed in defeat, knowing Frank was right. He never planned to talk things out with Dan if Frank hadn’t caught them.

“You know what the kid told me?”

Phil looked at Frank miserably, dreading whatever Dan possibly told him. Dan probably had had enough of the way he always avoided the elephant in their room.

“You mean everything to him, Phil. D’you know that? Everything.”

Phil felt a twinge in his chest upon hearing those words, of a pain he didn’t quite understand.

Frank sighed and leaned forward, clasping his hands on the table.

“I’m sorry for snooping. But when I first realised you were doing this assistant shit again I was honestly pissed off because I didn’t want you to get caught up in another Zack again.”

Phil looked away guiltily, they both knew he couldn’t get out of that mess without Frank’s help.

“I just had to make sure. I never expected the kid to cry in front of me, I’m sorry.”

“I guess the day was just too much for him,” Phil sighed, wanting nothing more than to go back to their room to comfort the boy.

“He was at a low point in his life when you took him in,” Frank said, “poor kid was jobless, broke and alone, having random hookups just to feel wanted. So desperate that he was willing to be your personal escort. But then you gave him something no random hook up could. Besides the money, of course.”

Phil gulped, he realised Dan never actually opened up about where he was before this job. They talked lots about their likes, dislikes. Where they wish to be in 10 or 20 years. Their childhood pets. But he never wanted to talk much about what he’d been doing after dropping out of university. Phil teased him about the video submission sometimes, but he tried asking about it properly once and Dan refused to say anything, so Phil never brought it up again.

“Apparently he’d never felt like he wanted to be with anyone as much as he does with you. But he thought you’d never feel the same. That was when the waterworks started.”

Phil was quite surprised by everything Frank’s telling him. How come Dan could easily confide in this man he just met? Then again, Frank had a way with being a listening ear and helping hand. He had many years of friendship with Frank to vouch for that.

“I didn’t know how to deal with that, I just told him to quickly wipe that off if he didn’t want you to come out of the shower seeing him crying and all,” Frank shrugged guiltily.

“But I did tell him I’ll help him talk to you. So now that I’ve answered your question, are you gonna answer mine?”

“....Was I in the shower that long?” Phil asked.

“You were,” Frank deadpanned, “but good thing you were or he wouldn’t have told me all that.”

Phil sighed and leaned back in his seat. He watched a couple kissing in the jacuzzi at the far end of the pool as he absorbed what Frank just told him.

They sat in silence for a while, Frank giving his friend time he knew he needed.

“I- I do,” Phil’s voice broke and his words came out a whisper, “love him.”

Frank looked on, letting him know he was listening.

“But I’m a fucking coward. I don’t want it to end up the way it did with Zack.”

“You do know this kid, don’t you? I only talked to him a few minutes and I know he’ll never be anything like Zack was.”

Phil blinked back tears of his own.

“I understand why you’ve been so guarded. But you can’t lead that poor kid on like this.”

“I know, but what am I supposed to do?!” Phil asked exasperatedly.

“This is the same man I’ve seen so confidently making deals with big clients and partners,” Frank rubbed his temples.

“I know how to do my job, that’s easy. This. Isn’t,” Phil flailed his hands.

“Just be sincere and tell him. You have nothing to worry about, trust me. You both now know for sure what’s going on, what’s there to lose?”

The couple Phil had been watching finally stepped out of the jacuzzi, giggling as they huddled together in a towel wrapped around both of them and headed back into the hotel.

In that moment, Phil wanted nothing more than to hold Dan close the same way. He rubbed his eyes and sat up, nodding at Frank’s reassurance.

-------------------

Back in the room, Dan was terrified of what would happen when Phil returns. He hadn’t meant to break down in front of Frank like that. He cringed at how he was so open and vulnerable to an almost stranger. He didn’t know what had gotten into him, but he’d trusted Frank to help speak to Phil. But how sure could he be that Frank wasn’t going to turn against him and inform Phil to get rid of the assistant who’d fallen for him?

He’d taken a quick shower and finally got the toys off him. It still felt weird to do it himself. He paced around a bit afterwards, wishing their room had a view of the pool so he could see Phil and Frank.

He had no idea what Frank would really tell Phil even though Frank tried assuring him that he only wanted what’s best for both him and Phil. What if ‘best’ meant making sure Phil leaves him?

The wait was excruciating and the tea he made for them did nothing to soothe his nerves. He waited until his drink finished and Phil’s had gone cold.

His mind came up with plenty of scenarios, more bad than good, but he did not know what he could say in any case. How would Phil even react to whatever Frank told him?

He reasoned with himself that Frank was on his side, after all Frank did tell him that Phil does in fact have feelings for him. He didn’t want to believe it, but the more he thought about their seven or so months together, the more he realised that it could actually be true. And maybe he’d known all along, he’d just been afraid to let himself down on the off chance that he was wrong.

Soon enough his thoughts exhausted him and he resigned to his side of the bed, curling up against the headboard. He could do nothing but wait.

---------

Phil quietly opened the door. Back at the pool Frank had given him the courage to face what was coming, but it faded with every step towards his room. He couldn’t help being nervous even though he knew he had to make things clear once and for all.

He stepped into the dark room, fumbling for the light switch. The whole suite was in darkness, could Dan have gone to sleep already?

But then a soft glow illuminated the bedroom, meaning Dan heard him enter and turned on the bedside lamp. He slowly made his way to the bedroom, feeling his heart thud faster.

Dan sat up from his curled up position when he heard Phil enter, not knowing what to do with himself. He stepped out of the bed just in time for Phil to walk into the bedroom.

There was a few seconds of stunned silence as they both just stood and stared at each other.

Dan’s heart was thumping wildly, and he wondered if Phil’s was doing the same. He broke their quiet stillness first, gesturing awkwardly to the cup of tea he’d made for Phil on the bedside table.

“I-I made-”

He didn’t get to finish his sentence as Phil had quickly strode over the space between them at the same time, and interrupted him with a crushing hug.

Dan gasped as he was squeezed in Phil’s arms wrapping around him tightly like Phil was afraid that he would disappear if he let go. The surprise dissipated soon enough and he brought his own arms around Phil.

Only then was Phil able to heave a breath of relief.

----------------------------

~Part 11~

the end is near :) and you’ll soon be free of having to wait 2 months between each update!!

#Phanfic #phan #dan the personal assistant #phan fic #My fic

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dyde21 · 4 years

Note

Writer AU? For percabeth maybe like a secret linin long time best friend thing. I love the florist AU

Sorry this took AGES. Finally started writing a bit again. I hope this is okay though!

XxXxXxXxX

Blushing, Belle blushed as she felt the hand slid across her cheek, cupping it as she felt his thumb trace over her lips gently, her smile quirking up at the motion. Her heart was pounding, but she was more distracted by the burn of her cheeks. She was wondering if they felt as hot on his hand as they did to her.

“Pierre…” Her voice caught in her throat as she stared into his eyes. She had seen them so many ways over the years of their long friendship. Joyful, sorrow-filled, playful, and even angry. But this looked more… raw. Passionate. And their focus was solely on her.

A dangerous smirk crossed his face, one that threatened to wipe away her self control when he started to move forwa-

“Hey Annabe-”

Annabeth jumped a foot out of her chair, slamming the lid on her laptop with a slam that made both her and the lightly sun tanned raven haired dork standing across from her wince at. She was honestly scared to check it later to see if it had been cracked.

“You okay there?”

He asked, setting down a coffee and sliding it to her, hesitantly like a peace offering.

Annabeth took a deep breath, hand on her chest as she tried to calm her heart rate.

“You scared the living shit outta me Percy.” Annabeth lamented, glaring at him slightly.

“I noticed.” He said, his voice concerned but the hints of a smile creeping up at the corner of his mouth. It was a look so “Percy” she couldn’t decide if she wanted to punch or kiss him.

He sat down across from her, pulling out his own laptop as the cafe around them resumed their normal chaos as their momentary distraction had settled down.

Quickly Annabeth opened her laptop and saved and closed the offending document in a blur before Percy could even attempt to look at what she was doing.

He took a sip of his drink as he raised an eyebrow at her. “Hiding something?”

“No.” Annabeth said stubbornly, as if it wasn’t glaringly obvious that was a lie.

Another trouble-maker smile crept on his face and Annabeth instantly knew she was going to hate whatever came out of his mouth next.

“I know you’re bold, but sitting in a cafe watching por-”

He was cut off as her foot collided with his shin, making his hand jostle as he spilled a little over his wrist.

“Fuck! Shit! That’s hot.”

He quickly set down his drink as he looked around for a napkin, but Annabeth was already handing him one in apology. “Sorry.” She said, her own smirk cutting the words short.

“No you’re not.” He accused.

“I am! Just slightly. You deserved it.”

“True. Just trying to lighten the mood. You seemed tense.” He offered, picking up his drink. Pausing, he tucked up his legs dramatically into his chair as he took a sip, leaning back from her.

Despite herself, she laughed at his antics, which earned a victorious smile on her best friend. She hated how easily he could make her smile, as if it was the easiest thing in the world to him. But that was a lie, it was one of the many reasons she was so utterly, annoying, completely, and hopelessly in love with her best friend.

Setting down his drink again, she saw his mood shift. He stopped fidgeting as much as his attention focused solely on her. She knew what was coming next, he had that same look his mother often got whenever Annabeth would confide in her for motherly advice she couldn’t get from her own family. Sometimes she could forget how much he looked like his mother, but whenever his mother hen side came out, it was always startlingly obvious.

“Annabeth, is everything okay?” He asked, as she mouthed the words along with him, knowing him like the back of her hand.

“I’m fine, Percy. Seriously. It’s just a new story I’m working on. You know how I get with my work.”

Wincing, she tried to ignore the sick feeling brewing her stomach. She hated lying to Percy, after all he had done for her in her life, pushing him away was the one thing she refused to do. But she also couldn’t admit exactly what the story was. It also wasn’t a complete lie. She really did get nervous about her works before they were done, and unless she deliberately wanted feedback, no one was allowed to see them.

He stared at her a moment longer, seemingly analyzing every minute detail about her, deciding if he believed her or how to press the issue.

“I’m serious. I would tell you if something was wrong, you know that.” She offered, pressing her advantage. He seemed to relent after a moment.

“You better.” He warned, before he focused back on his laptop. “By the way, science has just confirmed that studying is actually cruel and unusual.” He complained. “Why can’t I just like… speak with animals. That would make it so much easier to figure out what's wrong with them.”

“I feel like if you could speak to animals you’d have much bigger problems to worry about.” Annabeth countered. “You went in marine biology, not expecting to study?”

Shaking his head, he put in one earbud, still listening to her. “I expected it. That doesn’t mean it’s not still cruel.”

Rolling her eyes, Annabeth could still see the smile on his face even as he complained. For as much as he enjoyed bitching to her, she could tell he really had a passion about marine biology that was unparalleled in his life. She found it admirable how hard he worked for his dream, even when she knew he hated the amount of studying that went along with it.

“Here. Send me the study guide. I’ll quiz you.”

His eyes widened as he looked at her. “You’re the best, you know that?”

A moment later her messenger beeped as a new file was sent to her. She glanced between the profile picture she had set for him of a baby seal, and his eager expression as he waited for her to help him study and decided there really wasn’t much of a difference between the two creatures. It really was a good thing that Percy was so selfless around her because she really had a problem saying no to him.

As they began studying, Annabeth tried to keep her mind focused on the cute creatures Percy would be saving, and not the way his proud smile made her heart flutter when he impressed her with the results of his personal studying, or her writing still failed to capture even half the allure she found in her best friend.

Eventually Percy had to start another essay which had given Annabeth a few minutes to add some notes to her story for later. Most of which had been endearing quirks or habits she had seen Percy do while they studied. Staring at the file, still named “Untitled document” she sighed. She really hated coming up with names, even if this was one story that couldn’t really see the light of day. Pausing, staring at the blinking cursor, she typed in the name.

“Fuck_This”

Grinning, she closed the document as Percy started to talk about how they should go get dinner soon as a reward for working so hard. Annabeth quickly sent a text to her roommate, letting her know she’d be out late.

XxXxXxXxX

Leaning back over the edge of the couch, letting her head hang, Annabeth watched Piper walk out of the bathroom, drying her hair.

“How was your date?” Her best friend asked.

Pulling her head back to sit up straight, Annabeth sighed. “It wasn’t a date. We just got food. Like best friends do.”

“That sucks.” Piper offered.

“... I know.” Annabeth relented. She had given up on trying to pretend she wasn’t interested in Percy around Piper a few years ago, not that Piper had ever really believed her lie since they had met. Piper was probably the one person she had met as stubborn as her.

“He almost saw the story today.” Annabeth muttered, tucking her knees up to her chest as she dropped her head onto them. She couldn’t even imagine what would have happened if he had seen the story and pieced it together. She was pretty sure she would have actually died. Her relationship with Percy was the one thing in life she couldn’t ruin. It had acted like a lifeline to her more times than she could count.

“You mean your fanfic about him?” Piper asked, taking a sip of her soda, narrowly ducking to dodge the pillow that hit the fridge right next to her head.

“It’s not a fanfic! It’s just… inspired.” She offered, before burying her head in a pillow, ignoring how weak her defense was.”

“Riiggghhttt. I think you should just send it to him. It’s a unique way of confessing.”

“I’d rather die.” Annabeth countered. “He’d never let me live it down, even if he said yes.”

“If?” Piper asked incredulously. “Like he would say no. You just say you were going on a date next friday and he’d be your boyfriend without questioning it. He’s head over heels for you.”

“Then why hasn’t he asked me out yet?”

“Because despite the fact you two are both stubborn asses and impulsive, neither of you have a spine when it comes to the other. It’s a tragedy to watch, truly.”

Annabeth just slowly fell over, laying on the couch. “It’s not that simple.”

Piper had her hands on her hips as she looked down at her best friend, before sighing. “Well hopefully when you finish this story it’ll give you some ideas. For now I’m hungry so let’s eat. We still have a pizza in the freezer, right?”

Sitting up, Annabeth nodded. “And a bottle of wine.”

Piper perked up at that. “Now we’re talking!”

An hour later and they were both sprawled across their seats, sharing a veggie pizza as they split a bottle of wine that Annabeth had bought to celebrate the end of their previous term.

Annabeth’s phone buzzed, and she saw Percy’s name. Almost a little too quickly, she snatched up the phone, reading the text.

“Percy?” Piper asked, her eyes still glued to the TV.

Typing out her response, Annabeth nodded before pulling her laptop onto her lap. “Apparently he finished this essay, he wants me to check it.”

“Eh? Aren’t you supposed to be taking it easy?” Piper asked, pointing at her with her foot from her lounging position.

Annabeth shrugged. “This essay is important for his grade.”

“And you can’t say no to him.”

Annabeth just grumbled in response as she opened up his email. Staring at the file name, she laughed, earning a look from Piper.

“Percy’s essay is lovingly called “Fuck_That’” Piper rolled her eyes. “Make sure you remind him to change that if it’s an online submission. Didn’t he already get yelled at for something like that before?”

Grinning, Annabeth settled into the couch a little more to get comfy as she started to read through the essay. “Yeah. Twice.”

Piper laughed as Annabeth was feeling proud of Percy. His writing really had gotten better the past few years. He really was taking college seriously, and she couldn’t be more proud of him.

Annabeth was also caught a little off guard on how much of the content of his essay that she understood. She must have helped him study too often.

Piper had tried asking her a few more things, but Annabeth had only grunted in response, deep in work mode as she did her best to ensure she gave the best feedback she could. At least with a glass or two of wine already in her.

An hour later and she saved the copy that had the highlights and edits to send it back to him. He should still have plenty of time to do another pass over it before submitting it.

Scrolling through her files, she clicked the save and attached it, before sending it back in another email along with some general notes.

Closing her laptop and setting it on the table, she glanced over at Piper who was staring at her.

“Can we get back to girls night?”

Annabeth grinned sheepishly. “Sorry.”

Piper waved her off. “Anyway we have like 4 more episodes.”

Annabeth’s phone buzzed as she glanced at the text. It was thanks from Percy. Tossing her phone on the table, she focused back on the TV for a bit to relax, letting the migrational habits of certain sea creatures leave her mind for now.

About half an hour later, Annabeth noticed her phone was blinking. She must have missed Percy’s response. As Piper stood up, stretching out her legs before heading to the kitchen, she nearly dropped her plate when Annabeth let out a shriek.

“‘Beth? Is everything okay?” She asked, rushing back over.

Piper paused, seeing her best friend's face as pale as a ghost. What had happened?

Annabeth just held out her phone, letting Piper take it as she dropped her face into her hands.

Hesitantly Piper read the messages.

Thanks so much!

Is this your new story? I assume you want feedback while you edit mine.

It’s cute so far!

Hey… Pierre sounds familiar…

Annabeth?

“How…”

Annabeth was already furiously typing on her laptop, sending another email with his essay attached to it. Checking what had happened, she groaned as she realized what had happened.

“The file names were similar. I clicked the wrong one…”

Raising an eyebrow, Piper leaned over her shoulder. “How?”

“Cause I named my file ‘Fuck_This’”

Piper dropped her head onto Annabeth’s shoulder, laughing. “You two really do only have like 1 braincell between the two fo you don’t you?”

Annabeth lightly headbutted her. “This isn’t funny! Everything is ruined.”

Piper winced, standing back up and rubbing her head. “Maybe he won’t notice…”

Shaking her head, Annabeth wasn’t convinced. “He’s smarter than you think…”

Knowing she was right, Piper frowned. “Well at least you don’t have to worry about wanting to confess anymore.”

Annabeth stared at her phone, waiting for a reply.

Got the essay, thanks. Need to submit it, I’ll text you tomorrow.

Annabeth stared at the message, before showing Piper. “What does this mean?”

Piper shrugged. “That he actually needs to turn in his homework, and probably has no idea how to react to your fanf- story you sent him and what it might mean. I think you just need to wait for tomorrow.”

Grabbing the glass, Annabeth down the rest of her wine as she just laid down on the couch and screamed into a pillow.

Kneeling down, piper gently rubbed her friend’s back. She already knew it was going to be a long night.

XxXxXxXxX

Annabeth paced back and forth as she waited for the oven to ding. Okay, so she might have been stress baking at the moment. She had somehow managed to fall asleep last night, but she still hadn’t heard from Percy. Maybe he really hadn’t realized things?

Piper had grabbed one of the muffins from her first batch as she munched on it happily. “Have mentioned I really love the fact you stress bake?”

All Annabeth could do was make a pitiful stressed sound. Piper pulled her into a tight hug. “It’ll be okay. Percy is probably just trying to figure out the right way to address this. He’s as stressed as you are about thi-”

A knock on the door made them both freeze.

“Please tell me you ordered Pizza.” Annabeth said, glancing at the window. Maybe she could escape…”

“We’re on the third floor.” Piper reminded her as she made her way to their door. Opening it, her suspicions were confirmed as she saw Percy standing there with a bag of chinese food and a liter of soda.

“Is she home?” Percy asked simply.

Piper looked him over once, before nodding. “One sec.”

Grabbing her shoes and keys, she walked past him. “Good luck.” She offered, before patting him on the back and leaving the apartment. She figured they needed time to work things out, and it was up to them. Plus she figured she should grab another bottle of wine for either celebration or comfort.

Annabeth wondered what was taking Piper so long. “Pipes?”

“Not quite.” Percy offered as he turned the corner, holding up the bag.

Annabeth stared at him, then the bag, then the window.

“Hey Percy.”

“Thanks for the help with the essay. I brought lunch.”

Annabeth nodded. “No problem.” Her throat felt dry but she moved to get plates.

Nervously she dished up some of the lunch, trying to calm her heart and act normal but the subtle glances Percy kept giving her wouldn’t let her heart calm down. She was waiting for the shoe to drop.

They were both sitting on the couch now, both quietly eating the food. Even Percy, who was usually pretty talkative around her, was quiet. She knew she should act normal, pretend like it didn’t happen and leave the ball in Percy’s court, but everytime she opened her mouth to speak she just couldn’t find the right words.

“Your… story is good.” Percy said eventually, almost as if the words pained him. Wincing, Annabeth tucked up her knees to her chest as she braced herself. She had already imagined a million ways this conversation could do, and she was pretty sure it at least wouldn’t be as bad as some of the worst ones.

“Thank you.” She offered politely, really wishing her vocabulary hadn’t left her.

“Some of the characters seemed… familiar.”

Brushing a few strands of hair behind her ear, she nodded. “You know what they say, write what you know.” She offered with a slight smile, just waiting for him to really say what was on his mind. Her fingers started to drum against her leg. Couldn’t he just get it over with?

“Annabeth.” His voice trailed off. His brows scrunched up in that adorable way they did whenever he was trying to say something difficult for him. “Is that about… us?”

“What? No!” Annabeth snapped, before she covered her face with her hands. That… wasn’t what she had planned on saying. The old habits in her head were still screaming at her to repeat past mistakes, deny it, avoid the conversation, start a fight to avoid talking about it with Percy until they made up later and the subject wasn’t brought up again.

“I… see.” His voice was soft, almost hurt. That broke something inside Annabeth. She hated hurting him.

“It is, okay!?” Annabeth shouted, standing up suddenly. Her fists were clenched at her side.

“Yes! The story is based on us. Because you’re my best friend Percy. And for who knows how long, I’ve been hopelessly, irrevocably in love with you. Whenever I try and write a romance story, all I see is your stupid smile and your gorgeous eyes and when I try to imagine what sweet thing a guy could do, it’s always just whate you did for me before. I know it’s weird! I know you probably don’t want your best friend daydreaming about you but I can’t help it. It’s your fault I’m in love with you seaweed brain!”

The words had exploded out of her, her tone a bit more frantic than she had hoped. She couldn’t look him in the eyes anymore, and she was vaguely aware she was shaking slightly. She just couldn’t handle it anymore, and she’d rather have the truth out than start another fight with her best friend because she was too scared to admit how she really felt.

She saw Percy slowly stand up, and she braced herself. She knew he was too sweet to yell at her when she was like this, she figured he’d probably just walk out and let her calm down. Instead she felt his strong arms wrap around her and pull her close, his warmth embracing her and her nose being filled with her favorite scent that lingered on his hoodies she stole from him when she was feeling particularly greedy.

She froze for a moment, before she hugged him close back, unable to stop some of the tears from escaping her eyes. She knew she shouldn’t be getting all emotional right now, but the situation was too much for her.

A few moments of eternity later and they pulled back a bit. Annabeth was staring at him, as he still watched her, his brows furrowed.

“Percy, I-” She was cut off as his lips quickly connected to hers. Her eyes widened, but a moment later the greedy part of her brain took over again, as it always did with Percy, and she quickly returned the kiss for a few moments. Eventually he pulled back, looking slightly frazzled.

“Sorry! I just… needed you to stop talking for a moment. I didn’t know how else to do it…”

His cheeks were bright red, and she laughed slightly. “I can think of worse ways.”

“Annabeth. I love you too. Always have. But you create beautiful worlds, both in your architecture and your writing, and I just didn’t want to distract you from them. You deserve everything, and more.”

“It kinda feels like I’m holding everything that matters to me right now.” She muttered, squeezing him closer slightly. Her brain had kind of short circuited during the kiss, so she was relieved she had plenty of practice coming up with cheesy dialogue to lean back onto.

Percy blushed in an unfairly adorable way again, causing her to kiss him this time.

When they separated again, he was giving her that same grin that made her stomach sink and her heart do flips. “Does this mean you’re going to start calling me ‘Pierre’?”

Rolling her eyes, she kissed his cheek. “Don’t ruin the moment.”

A little while later they were cuddled up on the couch, which wasn’t too different from how they usually ended up but there was a lot less posturing and pretense leading up to it when the door to the apartment opened.

“Is it safe to come in?” Piper asked hesitantly. “Is everyone okay? Is everyone dressed?” She asked.

“Yeah. We’re good. Great even. Things are great.” Annabeth offered, glancing over at Percy who was just grinning at her.

“Phew.” Piper said dramatically as she walked in, setting down some groceries. “I had no idea what I was going to walk in on. I prepared for a few situations.”

Rolling her eyes, Annabeth probably would have been a little more snarky if she wasn’t still riding a high from Percy’s confession.

“So I take you two finally stopped that stupid dance you’ve been doing?” Piper asked, popping open the salsa and dipping some chips into it.

“Yeah. We are.” Annabeth answered, before sharing another quick kiss.

“Thank God. Finally. I also won thirty bucks off this.” She offered, sending out a quickly celebratory text that caused Annabeth’s and Percy’s phone to start exploding a few minutes later with messages from their friends.

She wouldn’t definitely get on her case about that later. But for now she could let it slide.

“Oh, and both of you really need to work on naming your files better.” Piper said as she plopped down on the chair off to the side, snapping a photo for instagram to let the world know that her friends had finally gotten a clue.

#percabeth #Percy Jackson #Annabeth Chase #PJO #Writer!AU #I havent posted in agesssss #I'm kinda pulling out of the fandom and might just drop stories into it occasionally #I hope this story makes at least someone smile though!#I thought it was cute #Even if the ending was meh

59 notes · View notes

masked-buffoon · 3 years

Text

Chapter 13: Filled emptiness (Part 2)

Warnings: cursing, angst, mentions of addiction

Author notes: that one is a very long part (around 3k words...). I tried to separate it, but it just wouldn’t fit, so here you go...! I think it’s been too long since we’ve had angst, so, as an author, it is my duty to write some for you XD please enjoy it!

"Kunikida-kun is so annoying~" Dazai whined as we arrived at his place "I did help the two of you~"

"Won't you admit that you could have done so earlier…?" I raised an eyebrow, removing my shoes.

"Well, it isn't wrong that it was funny to see you struggle…~" He chuckled.

"See…?" I sighed "That's why Kunikida is so tired of you…"

"Is that so?" He shrugged it off "I didn't know~"

I gave up trying to reason him. After all, messing around with our coworker was also something I did, although less than Dazai.

Even though it had almost been half a year, I still did not have a place of my own. The money I had started saving was not enough to rent an apartment, after all. For the moment, I thus stayed at my friend's, who had not lent me his bedroom. His place was divided in two rooms; a bedroom and a living one, where he was supposed to eat. I was his guest but he had graciously accepted to make me sleep in the living room… What a perfect gentleman Dazai was… Hopefully, I would soon be able to get my own apartment in the Agency's dormitory and sleep in my own comfortable windowless bedroom instead of waking up everyday because of the daylight.

"What about opening a bottle of sake to celebrate the end of the case?" He suggested.

"I don't want to drink tonight…" I declined "Tomorrow, I have an appointment with Yosano-sensei for my… Detoxification therapy…"

"Oh, I see." He did not insist "Let's just have a quiet evening then~"

"I'd like that." I smiled "By the way, did I tell you Uemura-san would teach me how to cook?"

"You didn't. That's great~"

"That's obviously not to feed you." I huffed "It is so I don't have to eat crab cans my entire life."

"You're mean…~ I do eat instant noodles as well…~"

"I can finally eat properly after all this time, it's not to have a diet based exclusively on junk food." I said simply.

"You might be right after all." He hummed "So, should we order something tonight?"

"... I'm still saving money..." I looked away.

"And I'm already indebted to the cafe beneath the Agency… I suppose that's either instant noodles or crab can tonight~"

He had tricked me again…

After eating frugally yet another evening and taking a relaxing bath, I unfolded the futon I borrowed from Dazai and let myself flop down on the mellow blanket, exhausted. Unexpectedly, my friend lied next to me.

"What are you doing…?" I questioned, eyebrows furrowed.

"I'm too lazy to go to my room…~ Besides, can't I stay with my friend~?"

"You've never done that before…" I noted. Is there a reason for your sudden behaviour?"

"You're wrong…" He chuckled, pulling a book out of nowhere "We've already been in a similar situation… Numerous times…"

"Cancelling my ability doesn't count…" I looked away.

He sighed slightly and casually started flipping through the pages.

"What are you reading? The same book about suicide methods again?" I asked, changing the subject.

"A good book is still good, no matter how many times you've read it~ Should I try committing suicide like this?"

He showed me the weirdest picture; a man sat in a large can, legs above his head. The method was supposed to kill him by eventually ripping his body in half. I stared at Dazai.

"Do you want my approval or my opinion?"

"I already know you won't give me your blessings for my suicide~" He grinned "Just tell me what you think~"

"Well… The chances you die are very low… It looks more like a… Torture method to me…"

"Eh? So it's painful…?!" He exclaimed, dramatically "I'm not trying that then…"

"I hope not…"

I took a book too, a mystery novel, and tried to distract myself from his annoying humming. I wanted to solve the crime before the fictional detective, but hearing Dazai sing next to me did not help me focus. After a moment, I put the book aside, and turned towards him. He had not turned a single page.

"Dazai…"

"What is it, Ogawa…~?"

"Let's get changed. We're going out." I said, standing up.

"Eh? But I've already taken a bath…~" He whined.

"Don't question it."

I should have doubted that this day would be strange, and that he would feel even more bothered by his usual torments. While he was putting his shirt on, I called the Fox.

"Do you know what time it is…?" He grumbled.

"Early enough, since you're awake." I smirked "I need you to find me something important… I need them in an hour…"

When I told him what I wanted, he yelled at me, but it was quick to hang up and avoid his scolding.

"So? Where are we going?" My friend asked me.

"You already know the answer…"

A shadow clouded his face, and he simply nodded. It had already been three years since that tragedy, yet it still seemed as present in our mind. Softly, I opened the door for him and called a taxi. It was dark, outside, a moonless night only enlightened by the stars and the lampposts in the streets. In that part of the world, humans still had the luxury to protect themselves against the monsters of the darkness.

The Fox was waiting for us in front of the cemetery, a bouquet of white lilies in his hands. As he gave them to me, he whispered:

"You owe me one."

I only nodded, and asked that we were left alone. Far from the entrance, under a majestic tree, which branches gently flustered with the wind, laid a single gravestone which bore the name of Dazai's late and most precious friend. When I looked at him, despite the lack of light, I saw he was expressionless. And motionless, too. I took his hands into mine, and placed the bouquet into them with a smile.

"This is important for you… Take all the time you need."

"... Thank you… You remembered…"

"In all honesty, I thought you'd slack off to pay him a visit, today… I'm sorry I was wrong…"

"Don't wait for me and just… Go back…"

I pulled the key to his apartment from my pocket.

"You know, I closed the door earlier. And…"

I placed them in his coat.

"I can't go back if you have them."

"Ogawa, I —"

"I'll be just at the entrance."

Surprisingly, the Fox was still there when I went out of the cemetery. I grinned at him.

"So~ What can I do to repay you for your help~?"

"Aren't you tired, Ogawa-san?"

I narrowed my eyes at him, and crossed my arms.

"What's with the sudden politeness? It's unlike you to be so formal…"

"I thought you might take me more seriously like that."

His face was severe. It was the first time I saw him without a childish expression and, suddenly, he did not seem like a teenager anymore. That reminded me we were the same age.

"Alright. Tired of what, Fox? I'll answer you, just… Drop that "-san"... I'm not used to it from you…" I gave up.

"Sure, I didn't plan to call you that endlessly anyway." He shrugged "Just tell me… How long are you going to pretend you're happy?"

"What are you talking about? My life really has changed for the better. I never thought I'd reach twenty-one years old, in the first place and I can even control my ability…" I sighed "Everyone in the Agency is so friendly, and I'll finally get treated for that damn morphine addiction, how can't I be happy…?"

"Well, since humans are all different, we all have various ways of being happy. Ogawa, I'm afraid your own happiness revolves a bit too much around… Him." He pointed at Dazai with his chin.

My friend was joyously chatting with the tombstone, as though his surroundings had disappeared, and as though I did not exist anymore. In his world, there was space only for him and Odasaku… I smiled slightly.

"You look as though you revealed me the purpose of my existence." I chuckled "I already know that, unfortunately… But he is my precious friend, the one I want to be happy…"

"At the cost of a fulfilled life of your own?"

"Nothing will fill the emptiness in my chest, except for his smile, maybe… I'm touched that you are concerned about me, Fox… But I assure you I am fine."

"What's the point of fighting so hard to earn the right to live, if it is to give it all up to a person who doesn't even see how soaked in blood the heart you give him is…?" He angrily shoved his hands in his pockets "Don't you ever tell me I didn't warn you…"

"I promise I won't." I giggled "You remind me of someone, a man I knew… I think you could call him my friend. Behind his rough facade is hidden a very sensitive poet…~ He usually had the right words to put me back on track…"

"Let me guess… You didn't listen to him at all…?"

"Am I so predictable?" I laughed "You're right, though… I didn't listen to him… So, I became addicted to morphine, then entered the Armed Detective Agency to be with Dazai… I don't regret it, nonetheless."

"I see… So you're the type who doesn't care about advice. That's good to know…" He mumbled "Anyway, let's talk about business."

"Mmh. I do owe you a favour. Do tell me what it is." I said, leaning back on a wall.

"In fact, I've been meaning to make that request to you a moment ago, but that's just the opportunity I needed." He told me, pulling a picture out of the pocket of his jacket "I have a friend. We grew up together, then got separated. I lost my parents and… Forget it. He's now a brilliant chemist, and he wants to open a laboratory in Hokkaido for his research. The government already agreed, but the locals aren't too fond of the project. He's already survived three assassination attempts… Could you protect him, please?"

"Being a bodyguard, eh…?" I took a look at the picture "You know I'm not bad at this kind of job. Well, I'll accept your request. I've been meaning to visit Hokkaido, after all…"

"I know. That's where I told you your sister is…" He remembered "Will it be alright for you?"

"I never said I'd meet her… What is your friend's research about?"

"It's complicated, but I think he's working on a formula to create petrol, you know… Instead of importing it."

"That's a very polluting business… I do understand the locals…" I frowned "I don't want to support him…"

"I know right? It's just… It's been more than five years since our ways have drifted apart… When he reached out to me, I couldn't help agreeing despite being powerless… I thought I could count on you." The Fox rubbed the back of his head.

"Of course you can. I'll handle the case for you. You've done so much to help me, I can't refuse a friend's request either." My lips turned upwards.

"I knew working with a detective was the best…" He snickered.

"That's because you work with the best one." I winked "I'll leave as soon as possible, maybe in a week."

"Oh, you're going to start therapy tomorrow?"

"... How do you know…?"

"You told me you would get treated soon, and I guessed you believed you'd feel better after a week, which is wrong, but I can only support you from afar." He shrugged.

"Why don't you work as a detective, too?" I laughed "I know it's going to be hard… But I'll manage, somehow. I have to… I'm this close to getting rid of that disgusting habit of mine…"

"Is that so?"

I nodded, and shivered. Although it was a summer night, the sudden breeze felt cold, and I tightened my tattered coat around me. My last trench had been ruined by my first case for the Agency and, since, I had only been able to afford an old, second-hand one which had already been well-used. Before buying new clothes, I needed to have my own place. These holes were not a bother to me, anyway…

"It's almost two…" The Fox noticed "If you start your treatment today, you may want to sleep, Ogawa… Otherwise, it'll be unbearable for you."

"Are you worried about me? That's so nice~ You're showing me your soft side today~"

"I've been worried about you since the first day we met…!" He suddenly raised his voice "Even though you were wearing a mask, your hands were so thin, and your clothes looked too big for you. And when you spoke… You would frequently pause to take your breath. You regularly came for the Mafia, and I do worry about my customers. If they die, I can't be paid…"

"... Was I really like that…?" I muttered "Whatever… I'm glad to have such a caring friend~"

"... Are you never going to take me seriously…?"

"I do take you seriously. However, as I said, you need not concern yourself with me. I am and will be fine."

"Idiot…"

It was touching that he cared about me to this extent. Five months ago, when I had come to him again to seek his skills as an informer, I had been such a troublesome customer, I had believed he would never want to work with me again. Thanks to Uemura-san, the Fox had dedicated his time to the cases I managed for the Agency, but, more importantly, we had gotten closer, to the point of becoming friends who playfully teased each other. However, I had never predicted that he would be so concerned about me. He had gone out of his way many times to help me out, going as far as finding Ruriko-chan and giving me, without charging me, all the information he had gathered about her life. I had not considered that I could be a person one could ever care about… It did feel nice, and I was ashamed that I had not, indeed, taken his feelings seriously.

We remained quiet, listening to the peaceful night of Yokohama. My eyes closed, and my ears were filled with sounds of all sorts. Above us, the wind danced in the tree leaves, gently accompanied by the distant song of the sea, which gently undulated under the thick veil of darkness covering the sky. Even Dazai had stopped chatting to silently honour his late friend's memory. The lamppost which enlightened the space around us started flickering, tired and old, before suddenly turning off. We moved towards another one, without a word.

I thought time had stopped, suspended by the beautiful concert nature was offering us, but I noticed I was wrong when I raised my eyes and saw the sky had cleared up, slowly taking its usual blue shade. That day would be a sunny one, I thought when my gaze fell onto the clouds coloured in warm orange watercolour by the rising sun. It was already dawn… We had spent the entire night out, and I had not gotten a single minute of sleep, unlike the Fox, who had succumbed to Morpheus as soon as we had moved to another lamppost. He was still standing, arms crossed and faced down. One could think he simply closed his eyes, but his slow and heavy breathing betrayed him. So, the best informer of Yokohama had the special skill to sleep anywhere, at any moment and in any position… It was a valuable one, yet a weakness he would not want his enemies to know of. This was proof that he trusted me… I could always use this information to tease him.

"... Is it… Already morning…?" He mumbled, sleepily.

"It seems so…"

"He's still not done…?" He frowned "For f*ck's sake, he made you wait the entire night and —"

"It's important to him… That's his late friend's death anniversary, after all…"

"... Aren't you his friend too…? And a living one, on top of that…!"

"Fox, it's enough… I'm tired, I can't bear your shouts so early, this day…" I stopped him.

"Right.. I'm sorry." He shoved his hands in his pocket "Well, do as you wish. I have work, today, so I'll head to my place. Thanks for accepting my request, by the way."

"You're my friend, it's my pleasure." I assured him.

He glanced at me, a strange, indescribable feeling reflecting in his eyes, before turning around and walking away. I could understand why he disapproved that I supported Dazai; any sane person would have already gone back to sleep, after all, and I knew no one who would be able to wait as much as I had. Even so, I felt it was my duty to be with him, from afar, so I could be there when he would be tired and broken by this peculiar night. It had always been my role…

I jumped in surprise when I sensed a coat suddenly covering my shoulders, on top of mine.

"I'm sorry, Ogawa… You must have been so cold… And it is the start of your treatment, too… I'm sorry…" Dazai apologised.

His hands did not leave my shoulders, and I pleasantly felt warmer, simply by being close to him. I smiled, gently.

"It's alright. I promised I would wait for you, after all. Besides, I wasn't alone. The Fox kept me company. He left just a few minutes ago." I told him.

"Is that so…? That's good."

"Yes… Are you ready to go, now?"

"Mmh. I'll go back to my place and slack off as usual~ What about you?"

"I guess I'll come with you. Yosano-sensei said she'd be waiting for me in front of the dormitory anyway." I told him.

"I see… It must be ready then~"

"What is…?" I raised an eyebrow.

"That's a secret~" He chuckled "Let's go~ I want to see the face you're going to make~"

"I'm a tad afraid of what I'll see though…"

"I can't say a thing~" He hummed, putting his hands on his hips.

He would usually put them in his pockets… But…

"Dazai…! Your coat…!" I followed behind him.

"You can keep it, I'm not that cold~"

"It's barely six a.m.…! There is no way you aren't cold…!" I protested.

"I'm not taking it back~"

"Dazai…!"

#bsd #bsd fanfic #bsd dazai #bungou stray dogs #bungo stray dogs #bungou stray dogs oc #dazai #Dazai Osamu

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seapandora · 4 years

Text

Birthday wishes｜One-Shot

Bucky x female!Reader

A/N: Today is my birthday, so I just wanted to write something cute. I was planning something else entirely for Sunday, but I needed some fluff in my life, thank you very much! Please reblog with your thoughts and like if you enjoyed reading this. Info on a future series will be out very soon so stay tuned! GIF-cred to owner

Warnings: Fluffy, angst, age gap (Buck was born in 1917…), birthdays, age-paranoia

Summary: Reader is celelbrating her birthday, but wll she celebrate it on her own or will her love come home in time?

Words: 1439

August 13th

Bucky was supposed to be home now, but he had been delayed in Europe. His book had sold more than anyone could ever imagine and he had had to add in dates for book signings. That was why Y/N was sitting alone in their shared bedroom watching some news.

After Steve went back in time Bucky and Sam worked apart from the state for a while. Doing more or less illegal missions, but saving people. After a very heavy mission, Bucky had decided to quit.

The money he had received as a war veteran had helped him buy a house in the suburbs of New York. It was fairly close to Steve and Peggy´s house, where he was often invited for lunch or dinner. A month or two after he moved into the house he adopted a shelter dog. It was a really sweet older dark brown boxer he had adopted. He had named the dog Commando after his former association with the group.

Commando was the sweetest old lady. The shelter had put her at 5 years but the vet Bucky had taken her too had confirmed her age to 7 or 8 years. She was a shy thing and it took her some time to warm up to Bucky but when she did she was the best dog. Commando could anticipate and feel when Bucky was starting to get anxious, and when he did she would curl up close to him.

Six months after that Bucky had met Y/N. She was a recently graduated journalist who free-lanced for different papers. Her latest project was a personal one though. She wanted to make an article about the anniversary of the end of the second world war, and she had her eyes set on Bucky for an interview. An interview he had happily given her.

He had been focused on telling Steves story before Y/N had politely stopped him and asked for his side of the story. She wanted to hear from the Seargent, not the captain. Bucky had been stunned but had started over with his point of view now instead. It was the first time someone had asked for his side of the story rather than him retelling Steves.

The article proved why Y/N had been so adamant about hearing his side of the story. She had already interviewed Steve, and yet the article was focused on Bucky rather than Steve. Reading the article Bucky saw his life in another's eyes. It was beautiful, and it was everywhere.

It gave Y/n the opportunity of becoming an editor while Bucky was approached by several editors who wanted to offer him the best deal to make an autobiography. It wasn’t until Y/N approached him and asked if he would consider it that he said yes.

One thing led to another and two years later, they were now married. The book had taken a long time and a lot of late nights to finish but four months ago it was published. Bucky was sent on a world tour as the face and mentioned author of the book while Y/N stayed behind and dealt with the publicity. She didn’t like traveling a whole lot and Bucky had promised to be home for her birthday.

And yet here she was, not a word from Bucky for the past three to four days. That was weird when you were married, right? Y/N thought so at least. Throughout her life, she had had people leaving her for, in their words, bigger and better things. Of course, her mind had begun to scare her into thinking the worst.

Commando could practically feel the anxiety roll-off Y/N and jumped up on the bed to curl up with one of her owners. It calmed Y/N in two ways. One, she had someone around to sleep beside, and two Bucky would at least have to come back, he wouldn’t leave Commando.

She sighed to herself and turned the sound of the tv as to not disturb Commando. “What do you say Do? Let´s sleep and just get tomorrow over with, eh?” She asked and looked down at the dog who looked back up at her with big eyes. Y/N chuckled and turned to her side turning the light off. She didn’t bother checking her phone since she knew she wouldn’t see anything of importance.

August 14th

Commando woke Y/N up bright and early on Friday that was Y/Ns birthday. Y/N groaned but sat up after just a few seconds. The other side of the bed was as empty as it had been the night before. She sighed and shook her head before she got up and got into some sweatpants and a sweatshirt.

Running always helped Y/N when she was overthinking. She hated running but did it anyway. Of course, Commando came with her, but Y/N´s running was at most a leisurely trot for Commando. They were out for 45 minutes before they came back home to have some breakfast and just enjoy the day.

Y/N could hear her phone go off with notifications in her bedroom but she made no move towards it. She got dog food for Commando before she made herself a cold smoothie. It was supposed to be a hot day so Y/N felt happy about having her exercise for the day done.

She enjoyed her smoothie in the kitchen while looking out the windows of the house. A car pulled up outside but she made no attempt to move. Commando didn’t bother until she heard the door at which point she went flying out to the hall to greet her dad. Y/N stayed behind and finished her smoothie before washing the mug off and putting it in the dishwasher.

A pair of strong arms wrapped around her mid-section, one colder than the other. She felt kisses along her neck and shivered. “I don’t get a hug or even a hi?” Bucky asked softly and Y/N could hear the disappointment in his voice. “Yes well, I would expect that if I were you and hadn´t kept in touch for a few days,” Y/N bit back and closed the dishwasher before turning to look at Bucky who now had a deep frown etched onto his stupidly beautiful face.

“I told Steve to tell you I lost my phone!” He said loudly making Y/N flinch a bit. She had always had issues with loud noises and Bucky raising his voice wasn´t an exception. “Has he tried to reach you?” He asked and reached up to pull a hand through his hair. It no longer flowed to his shoulders like it once had but Y/N still liked it.

She frowned now as well and shook her head. “Well, I might have ignored my phone and all that because I didn’t want to feel anxious or stuff.” She mumbled and shied back a bit as if she was afraid. “Christ doll, I´m so sorry. I lost my phone three or four days ago, I hurried home as fast as I could.” He said and reached out taking Y/N´s hands in his own.

He tugged on her gently to pull her closer. That’s when the dam broke for Y/N and she began to sob into Bucky's chest. All of her anxiety was in vain, and she felt stupid for ever thinking Bucky didn’t want to be with her anymore. He had married her for goodness sake. “Please don’t cry doll, I should have figured out a way to reach you,” He mumbled and caressed her hair with his right hand.

Bucky didn’t know how to make it better so instead of trying with more words he picked Y/N up and carried her into the bedroom. Commando followed behind him whining softly. He placed her down on the bed carefully and got in beside her without taking anything off. Of course, he had left his shoes by the door but right now he knew Y/N needed him close. The weighted blanket they had gotten together was by the foot of the bed and he pulled it up over both of them.

Right then and there he promised to never ever be gone for Y/N´s birthday or other important days. Nothing was more important to him than Y/N. He sighed softly and held her close. “Doll I know it´s tough right now, but tell me your birthday wishes, tell me what you want. I´ll give you anything,” he mumbled and kissed her forehead.

“You, just you, that’s all I want and need,” She whispered and buried her head in his neck taking in the safety his arms provided her.

#Bucky Barnes #bucky x reader #Bucky Barnes x female reader #bucky barnes fanfiction #fanfiction #fanfic #fanfiction angst #fanfiction fluff #avengers fanfiction #Avengers #marvel fanfiction

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fics-not-tragedies · 4 years

Text

Is this what you wanted?

This fic is based on a request I got ages ago, that was submitted by @kollover24and I hope this is what you had on your mind love!

SUMMARY: Santino sees how you sign to Ares that you’ve never had an orgasm and he tells you that he can easily resolve that issue. Words: 1725; Warnings: smut;

Readers tag list:

@spookier-than-u; @oreofenyloetyloamina; @derangedcupcake; @geostarr; @catsmieow; @wickedlangdon; @bodhi-black; @bugalouie; @onebatch--twobatch; @fandom-lover-4; @mikaneonox; @drunkonyellow; @spadesandaces2342; @harrisongslimited; @hhighkey; @lunilate; @i-cant-remember-my-old-login; @sgt-morgan; @coloursunlimited; @childrenofthegun; @weminiaturestrawberry; @silverlambcaptain; @scarletmoon83; @howtoruin-someones-perfect-day; @krazycags01; @charlottebonnie; @moonlit-raven-haven; @girl-at-the-verge; @boopdedoop; @jardani-jovonovich-bitch; @ladyreapermc; @wifeofdarklordsworld; @mysticfluffyness; @zombiepandajfish; @kollover24; @greenmanalishi; @persephonehemingway; @lovelycarose;

Santino D’Antonio was the kind of man who had to be good at everything. He was the kind of man who had to be better than every other person in the room. You were lucky to be one of the people he worked with on a daily basis. Of course it took ages for you two to gain each other’s trust, but when it finally happened you two formed an unusual type of friendship that lasted.

Now you, along with his other associates, were having drinks at one of the bars he owned. He disappeared for a moment with the rest of his henchmen, while you and Ares were left in the booth patiently waiting for his return.

“Quite a wild night, eh?” Ares signed to you sliding another glass full of whisky across the table in your direction.

“I wouldn’t exactly call it that…” you signed back and accepted the drink lifting it up in the air and Ares clinged her glass with yours smiling widely.

“How’s your new guy?” She wiggled her eyebrows with the movements of her hands.

“My new guy?” You asked her, taking a long sip of the whisky, “Just like every previous one.”

“So… it’s not working this time too?” Ares scratched her forehead, “Have you tried that vibrator I recommended you?”

“I did…” you signed with a shrug and fiddled with the tumbler in your hands.

“And…?”

“And I still haven’t had an orgasm…”

“Is that true, bella?” You saw Santino emerge from behind where Ares was seated and you blushed furiously.

You wanted to sink into the ground knowing they were now looking at your flushed cheeks.

“Well… em… I-I…”

If you didn’t want the ground to open up and swallow you before, you definitely did now – your cheeks heated up again and you couldn’t bring yourself to meet eyes with neither of them.

“It’s late, we can deal with what’s left here alone. Go home, Ares” Santino signed to her and she mouthed a silent ‘sorry’ when she was walking away.

“Sorry… Do you want me to leave too?”

“No, please stay with me, bella…” he explained, while pouring himself another glass of whisky then sat close to you, your thighs pressed together, “Tell me… what you signed to Ares… was that true?”

“No… I mean… yes…” You sighed, getting frustrated.

“Oh” he breathed, eyebrows raised in shock.

“Don’t just say 'oh’, Santino. Oh, for fuck’s sake… I’m the one embarrassed here” you sighed, putting your face in your hands.

“But… haven’t you’ve done yourself? Using your hands, /bella? I bet you’ve done it” he tried to reassure you, his fingertips dancing on your naked arm.

The room was deadly silent.

“Wait… You mean that you’ve never, at all, had an orgasm? Not even one, bella?” Santino was shocked, this wasn’t a thing he was told about quite often.

“That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you, yes” you groaned, finally looking up at him with your red face.

“Why not?” He said, incredulously.

“Because there’s something not working properly in me apparently… It’s not like I haven’t tried!” You cried. That’s when you saw something change in his face, that wild sparkle visible in his eyes.

“I could try myself if you let me… I’ve never failed at satisfying my lover before, bella” he said, confidently.

“What makes you think you could do it?” You snorted, his arrogance was almost funny.

“I’m telling you I could. Potrei farlo con le dita, potrei farlo con la lingua e potrei farlo sicuramente con il mio cazzo!” You were used to hearing Santino say vulgar things, but you couldn’t help but get a little bit aroused at the thought of finally being able to understand what an orgasm feels like.

“Santino, just forget about it…” You took a sip from your glass, but he took it out of your hand and placed it back onto the table.

“It’ll happen tonight if you let me, bella” he challenged. Fuck, it was getting harder and harder to resist him.

“We can’t do it… not here… also… fuck you’re my friend after all” you sighed.

“Your friend, who is quite willing how good a woman can feel” he countered.

“For fuck’s sake, fine. Show me just how quickly Santino D’Antonio can make a woman cum with his Italian fingers.”

“Challenge accepted” he smirked.

Then you found yourself laying on your back, spread out across the table in the snug of his private booth, with your dress hitched up above your waist and your underwear thrown somewhere on the floor. Santino had lifted your legs up towards your shoulders and pinned them there with one hand, while his other hand worked on the task he had assigned to himself.

“Does that feel good, bella?” He asked stroking along your folds before dipping two fingers in and out of you at a reasonably slow pace.

“I don’t know, feels okay I guess…” you said, it didn’t feel much different to any of your other sexual encounters.

“What about now?” He asked, curling his fingers slightly more so they were dragging against you on the inside. Oh, well that was a little different.

“Yeah, a little better…” you sighed, it was getting better – still not enough to have you seeing stars.

Santino continued curling his fingers into you, ensuring he brushed against that spot inside you each time. It wasn’t until he brought his thumb up to press against your clit that you gasped in surprise, getting a little bit wetter around his fingers, “Hmmm, so you liked that then?”

“Yeah… it… it feels good” you sighed, “But I still don’t think it’s working how it should be, Santino.”

“Give it time, bella” he said softly.

After a couple more minutes, it felt good enough that you were moaning softly while he pressed his fingers into you before dragging them out at an excruciatingly slow but rough pace. This was definitely the most sexual gratification you had ever gotten… but you just didn’t know if you would reach your peak like this, feeling like you still needed more.

“Santino, this feels so good and I’m thinking maybe if you could…” you trailed off, annoyed at having to swallow your pride and ask your best friend to fuck you good and hard.

“Ask me…” he smirked, “Ask me properly, bella.”

“Santino, I think I could probably do it if you fucked me” you whined, moaning as his thumb circled against your clit just right.

“You really want that?” He asked, “Well, conveniently my cock is rock fucking hard for you, bella.”

And well… that did something to you, knowing that Santino D’Antonio himself was aroused by you. You groaned, grinding down against his hand, getting impatient.

“Cazzo” Santino moaned, watching you become even more desperate for an orgasm, “Yes, bella, I’ll fuck you.”

He let go of your leg, slipped his fingers out of you and made quick work of his suit pants, pulling them down just enough to free his aching erection. You whined at the loss of contact, but it was only seconds before he was pressing his hot member against your entrance and you were wrapping your legs around his waist to hold him close.

“Oh f-fuck” you moaned, as he traced around your clit with the tip. It was like suddenly the room was filled with electricity, you were shaking with pleasure every time he slid his erection up and down your folds in an effort to tease you. It was right then, that you knew he would be the one to make you come eventually, “Stop teasing Santi, show me what you can do.”

His eyes darkened at your words and he slowly pushed into you, until he was filling you completely. He thrust in a few times before changing up the angle slightly, so every time he pushed into you he’d hit just the right spot – making you squirm around on the table and moan loudly.

“Tell me when you’re going to come, bella” he whispered against your neck, pressing open-mouthed kisses into your skin.

He brought a hand in between your bodies so he could rub your clit to the same rhythm that he was drilling his hips into you. You were beginning to feel like something was building inside of you, like you were finally going to get some relief.

“Santi, oh fuck… keep going… don’t stop…” You begged, “Don’t stop. Don’t stop.”

“I’m not going to fucking stop until your coming around my cock, /bella” he whispered into your ear, pulling out all the stops to try to get you there.

Tt felt so fucking good. Santino fucking into you roughly, rubbing you in all the right ways and whispering dirty words into your ear. Maybe this is what you had needed all along, some arrogant twat with a reputation for overachieving to make your orgasm his mission. You would never admit it but you had never been more grateful for his existence.

“Santino, I think… oh yes, Santi… I think I’m gonna…” you squeezed your eyes shut, mouth falling open in pleasure. You had no idea if words were even coming out of your mouth; all you knew was that this was the best feeling in the world.

“Go on. Come for me /bella” he whispered, on a particularly hard thrust and that was it. Your muscles contracted and your clit throbbed as finally, pleasure exploded inside of you. You felt yourself getting wetter as the world around you went white and stars exploded, dancing behind your closed eyelids.

“Oh cazzo bella… cazzo” you heard Santino moaning, when you were finally able to make sense of what was happening around you. He pulled out slowly, cock still extremely hard but clearly a little dazed at what had just happened.

“Santino, that was… the best. The best ever” you groaned, pushing your hair out of your sweaty face, “I’m sorry, do you want to finish?”

“I just need a moment” he whispered.

You reached down to guide his erection back into you, even though you were still shivering through aftershocks, “Do you want to come or do you want to reflect on what you just did to me?” You giggled.

“I can definitely do both, bella” he moaned, setting himself a new rhythm.

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sabineelectricheart · 3 years

Text

Just a Friend, Practically a Sister

Summary: Jamie is in love with Derek. Derek is in love with Miranda.

Rating: K - Intended for general audience 5 years and older. Content should be free of any coarse language, violence, and adult themes.

Words: 1700

Notes: Eh, not the best, but I wanted to flex these muscles. I hope you like it all the same.

“Jamie?” He asks, almost shocked someone could ever make such a preposterous claim. “Don’t worry about that, babe. She’s just a friend. She’s practically a sister to me.”

*_*_*_*_*

It was one hug.

One hug that happened weeks ago, yet it was all that Jamie could think about. It crept into her mind when she was least expecting it, catching her off guard and making her blush, worrying in case somebody saw her smiling at herself. Even so, she replayed it over and over again in her head. It was clear as day, for anyone who set their eyes on her, what was up.

It all happened one night, the State Championship game in Thousand Oaks. Jamie had begged her mom to go, despite being three hours on the Amtrack, just because she wanted to see her friend on the height of his high school career. After their victory, the whole team was celebrating on their way to the changing rooms and Derek had pulled her in for a sweaty, uncomfortable hug.

They had hugged loads of times, of course. They were best friends and she liked to express her appreciation on a physical form, too, but this time it felt different for Jamie. It felt different than every other time she had hugged him because she could not get it off of her mind. It plagued her day in and day out for weeks and she does not even know whether or not she liked it.

She could not have a crush on Derek, surely. He was one of her oldest and best friends and that was stepping into dangerous territory. Lest she wanted was to splinter him off from their friend group, God knows he needed more friends and less teammates and groupies.

Now, Summer was upon them. The teen girl knew that Derek would be away on training camp sometime in July, but until then, their little posse was spending their days on the beach and enjoying youth.

“Morning, Jamie!” Derek cheerily greeted, slipping into the seat next to her at breakfast, Cove taking his place on her other side.

Since Derek lived far away and still depended on the rides his father offered, he would always come by early. So, Jamie took upon herself on making and offering him, and Cove, who would come by lured by the smell of pancakes, some breakfast first thing in the morning.

“Morning, you two.” Jamie smiled at them and the Latino boy grinned back at her.

God above, that smile. What she would not give to have him smile at her like that every day?

As the days passed them by, it only got worse. She kept noticing more and more things about him that she had never noticed before. As they had lunch on the beach, they sat on a chequered blanket on the sand and the sun was shining on Derek’s face. It made his hair glow as the light shone through it, and she also noticed how he had a few freckles dotted across his nose, how when he was laughing really hard at something, a bit of his tongue would poke out of his mouth.

In the evening, when they were studying in her living room, Jamie noticed how the dim lighting above them made his long eyelashes cast crescent-moon shaped shadows down onto his cheeks. How, when he stretched, his shirt would ride up a little bit, revealing a bit of his stomach.

It was driving her crazy about how much he was on her mind. It went on like this for weeks, until she was sure that if she were asked, she could produce a perfect description of Derek Suarez, including all his habits, likes and personality.

As it is often the case, the teen girl had not been as discreet as she thought she were. One day, Cove has had quite enough of this puppy love and cornered Jamie in the sidewalk, just as they finish saying their goodbyes to the jock.

“You like him.” The boy was categoric.

“What are you on about, Cove?” She yawned.

“Derek.” The surfer rolled his eyes, despising obtuse behaviour. “It’s so obvious, I’m surprised he’s not noticed himself yet.”

“I don’t…” The girl tried to intercede.

“I’ve seen the way you look at him, Jamie.” Cove cut her off. “It’s the same exact look I give my little fellas at the aquarium.”

“You’re sick.” She said, straight faced. “Look, please don’t say anything, Cove, I’m honestly just trying to forget about it.”

“If you wish, it’s as good as I’ve never noticed a thing.” The boy smiled kindly, trying to ease her nerves. “But if you want me to put a good word in for you then I can. I’m a good wingman.”

“I’m fine. Honestly.” Jamie smiled a little bit. “It’s just a little crush anyway, it’ll be gone in a few days.”

She was wrong. A month had passed since her conversation with Cove and every time she looked at Derek a smile would creep onto her face. Cove caught her doing this many times and would just wink.

“C’mon, Jamie!” Cove pestered, as they sat in front of his father’s store. “It’s been ages now, please just tell him that you like him, already. I’m sick of playing cupid now.”

“You’re hardly playing cupid, seafoam head.” She laughed. “All you’ve done is switch seats with me during meals so we’re sitting next to each other.”

“Well, I’m sorry for trying to get you two together!” He feigned being hurt. “If you want me to have a word then I said that I…”

“Have a word with who?” Derek has suddenly appeared behind them.

“Oh, er, Miranda.” Cove improvised. “She said she would like to join an NGO this summer, I thought I’d give her some pointers.”

“I’m on my way up to the mall to meet her now, actually. I can pass on the message?” Derek offered, looking at Jamie, who now looked rather pale.

“Nah, it’s okay. It’s a bit long. I’ll have a chat with her later.” He lied.

Derek smiled and walked off, leaving Jamie and Cove alone on the sidewalk.

“How about we go for a walk on the mall ourselves and we can talk about how you’re going to confess your feelings to Derek?” The boy offered.

Jamie rolled her eyes but followed him, nevertheless.

“I wonder what he’s going to meet Miranda for…” She said.

“Why? Getting jealous, are you?” Cove joked, poking her playfully. “It must be something about her work at the store, probably. I don’t think they have any other common interests. Strange how he’s not mentioned it to me, though.”

They talk animatedly on their way down the street, as they leisurely walk to the mall. They stop on a few stores once there, buying some necessities and checking out the new wares on their local temple to consumption.

Finally, they reached the food court. Once there, amongst the lean patronage of a late lunch, sat two well-known figures.

“So,” One of the voices spoke. “How about a drive to LA on Saturday? My dad’s lending me the car.”

“Like a date?” Miranda asks, confused.

“Of course!” Derek confirms, enthused. “I like you, babe. I want to go out with you.”

Jamie stopped dead in her tracks, Cove lingering behind her.

“But what about Jamie?” The round-faced girl asks, concerned. “I’m sure she fancies you.”

“Jamie?” He asks, almost shocked someone could ever make such a preposterous claim. “Don’t worry about that, babe. She’s just a friend. She’s practically a sister to me.”

Derek, then, leaned down and kissed the girl on the lips. Jamie’s eyes were stinging. It felt like she had been punched in the stomach, like all the breath had been stolen out of her lungs.

She turned round quickly, pushing Cove out of the way and ran out of the food court. With no idea where she was actually running to, moments later she found herself at the wired gate through which they came inside.

She threw herself down against one of the barbed walls and looked up at the summer sky. Tears streamed down her face. She drew her knees up against her chest and buried her head in her arms. The girl did not even notice that someone was stood in front of her until she lifted her head to wipe her eyes with the hem of her t-shirt.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you,” Cove took a seat next to her and she sniffed in response.

A moment of silence hangs between them.

“I love him, I really do, but he’s a downright idiot, sometimes, my friend.” He wrapped his arm around her shoulders.

“It’s not his fault.” Jamie croaked, her throat sore from the crying. “He isn’t obligated to like me back. I should’ve just told him how I felt, though, so he could just turn me down easy.”

“I know, I know.” Cove comforted her.

“It just hurts, you know?” She sniffled. “Knowing that all we’ll ever be is friends,”

It did hurt. Over the next few months, even as the boy left for his training camp, she had to watch Derek and Miranda’s love grow. He would call her daily and visit whenever possible, though he never again step foot in Sunset Bird.

As the season changes, Jamie watched how much the girl made him smile, how he would bring her stupid gifts to their outings on weekends, how she would sometimes catch them falling behind the group, all cuddled up and completely separated from the others, lost in their own little world.

It hurt because Derek would never know how Jamie felt about him, how much it hurt her when he had referred to her as “just a friend”. Even though it hurt, she decided that it was much better to have Derek in her life, just as a friend, than to not have him in her life at all. To have a small piece, even if she could not have it all.

Someday, it would all be behind her. She would find someone else to love. Until then, it just hurts to be another friend.

*_*_*_*_*

Our Life Masterlist

#our life: beginnings & always #derek suarez

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