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#I get it can be super draining to see
baeshijima · 4 months
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it is now officially the 25th which means...
merry christmas everyone !!! regardless of whether u celebrate or not, i hope u all have a lovely day with whoever u spend it with or with urself <33
#sophie's idle chatter#this is scheduled so im HOPING it posts at 12 am.... prays....#i havent been super active in the past month or two bc life is kicking my ass (<- has said this countless times already but its still true)#also !! i see asks and ill try and answer them when i actually have the time and energy 😭 ik i say this a lot but ive been drained good god#(not so) mini life updates :#the new lovebrush chronicles main story update has made me weep so much... ive done both clarence and ayns routes and....#my god.... this story is darker and honestly im loving it AND i love how they did the chara roles in this world (alkaid... ourgh...)#my tear glands arent tho bc ayn ending 3.... what the fuck was that i couldnt sleep after doing that ending??? ITS WAS SO SAD AND FOR WHATF#currently having to wait until the 27th so i can do lars route 😔#the recent ep of apothecary diaries.... ourgh my heart.... jinshi and maomao beloveds :((#oh !! and ive gotten back into my ace of diamonds/daiya no ace phase and have been rewatching the series...#sobbing chris and yuki and miyuki my beloveds.... kissing ur foreheads and holding u gently.....#the way i got back into it bc im catching up on s2 of a clean sweep (a korean baseball variety show that i love with all my heart ;w;)#my mum is a traitor tho bc she watched every new ep that came out on tuesdays while i was in uni 🧍‍♀️ so now im catching up on the 30 eps#on my own 🧍‍♀️#OMG AND ALSO DR STONE S3??? WHY WAS I NOT NOTIFIED THAT PART 1 CAME OUT MONTHS AGO AND PART 2 WAS MORE RECENT???#i havent been doing that much writing recently tho bc the fingers wont type but the brain is exploding with ideas i cannot handle this#i do want to get back to the haitham sxf series tho.... and also my oc various x reader series.......#tbh ive been contemplating abt publishing the haitham series on ao3 once i write more chapters before publishing them#idk i feel like the series would be nice to have on ao3 as well as tumblr JHDG#thats abt it i think?#anywho if u read this far then know i am giving u a warm cookie as a condolence prize for getting through this life dump <33#ill leave it off here but i hope u all have a lovely day !! mwah mwah merry chrysler everyone 🎄🫶#queue... ueueue
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opens-up-4-nobody · 4 months
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...
#shout out to my nana for saying my dad spends money like water#my dad who struggles with the idea of spending money bc of obsessive compilation thoughts but is making an effort#bc whats the point of saving up all your life just to die. nana? my dad whose wife is literally dying of cancer and is beginning to circle#the drain so hes deciding he wants to start spending his retirement money now while shes still alive. u old witch. Jesus christ. my mum#isnt gonna live forever. shes getting her bladder removed in February i think. imo ill just b happy if she lives past the end of my 5year#program. like holy fuck. i mean. its not really nanas fault. she probably has 0cd and probably has 0cpd. but like this is y u wanna try to#get better. so you dont grow into a miserable old fuck whose family hates u bc ur awful and killing ur husband thru ur illness. just saying#as someone whose can see their own behaviors mirrored in her. this is y i cant go on like this lol#hopefully i hit my rock bottom last year. ugh. i just wish i could sleep. when im not super depressed i cant seem to get a normal amount of#sleep and im exhausted all afternoon. im awake at night and early in the morning. it makes me nauseous too. insomnia i guess#but ive always slept rather little. maybe it was compulsive and now im just old and cant take it#hate it. wish it would stop but at least i dont feel like dying anymore i guess. im guessing the meds r exacerbating thr sleep issues if not#causing it. ugh symptom management i guess#unrelated
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softersinned-arc · 1 year
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it is worth posting this tho so just a real quick note on activity & general housekeeping -
my grandmother is 88 years old and struggling with dementia (possibly alzheimer's - there's a family history, but she's never been diagnosed). two days a week i'm her primary caretaker; four days a week i work between six and eight hours a day; i am additionally constantly applying to jobs, working on taking care of a house on my own, and trying to generally help out wherever else i can.
basically this just means that i'll be here when i'm here and i won't when i'm not. i'm doing my best but there is so much potential source of stress in my life that i simply cannot be fucked to add another. this is here for joy and it is not worth doing if there isn't joy. i'll reply to things when i can & it's totally cool if that's not your speed! there's no judgment for how you choose to engage with this hobby & if you prefer lightning-fast partners i don't blame you in the slightest. this is just a general statement of what to expect here; curate your dash & your experience on this website based on your own needs.
since i've taken tumblr off my phone, your best bet, if you want to plot or talk ooc, is to get my disco; i'm happy to share it w any & all mutuals!
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cheekydogs · 1 year
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The last week’s been absolutely crazy, and the next month’ll keep getting crazy, but right now I’m just glad to be home and bundled up with Sunny at my side ^_^
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gaykey · 1 year
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i am so burntout right now i might just die actually
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noxtivagus · 2 years
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a few more hours
#🌙.rambles#starting to feel a bit more like myself again#i love writing! expressing my creativity! through words! or music!#or anything really!!!!#also productivity n success means a lot to me so making progress on my assignments even though i'm super tired rn is helping#i'm trying hard to improve myself everyday n do a little better but#what needs to stay constant in that is. i need to be kind to myself#like i feel really bad for ghosting others rn#i hate it. i don't want to do it. but i also have to acknowledge that i'm drained right now#i'll work on communicating that better. in time. as long as i see n accept both my strengths n weaknesses then i can move onwards#loneliness and my general health (physical emotional mental) is hmmm#i know what i need to improve on. and i know i'm getting there. slowly.#i really just#one of my biggest regrets is unintentionally destroying the world around me when it gets too much in my head#i'm a bit. tired. of feeling like i have to be perfect for others in order for me to be deserving of what i give them#i don't change myself though. at the very least i want to make sure i stay true to myself. if it's not smth morally incorrect tho or yh#i want to stay real. but it's hard to#i don't know. no matter what i do there's no#comfort for that innate loneliness in my head. the agonizing silence. the dreams that will never come true#so it's a cycle. i get tired. i don't take good care of my health. i plunge myself deeper down and fall even further#n i lose sight of myself#bcs i know more than hatred or despair. love and hope mean more to me. always#but it's so hard when it gets overwhelming n i don't take care of myself and#hormones 😭 this is definitely pms this week bcs aside from this chest pain and stress. i'd be doing a lot better. i hate mood swings#but i just#wish i could do it alone. i don't want to bring anyone down with me.#wait no i can't write this properly#too much thoughts in my head. trying to write them now while i'm stressed and sleep-deprived wouldn't help.#i'll do it when i'm in a better condition n not on the verge of another breakdown.#oh goddamn yeah this is definitely pms rn mixed with my sleep-deprivation
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jaeyxns · 2 years
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(๑ᵕ⌓ᵕ̤);
#rambles←⋆。˚#as an introvert#these past few days where i've had to socialize and interact with so many people from 8am to 6pm each day has me beyond drained#and the driving back and forth each day just has me wiped out too#overall it was such a great experience getting to know people and i'm super grateful for a new job#but it's a lot and can be quite overwhelming#and apparently it doesn't end here#since i'm a new hire things will still be overwhelming until the end of october#and the internal sigh that i let out when i heard that.....#on the bright side things should be okay by the time jake's birthday comes around#this also makes me feel a bit better about not being able to see enha in october#because i'd rather not have my job dragging me down before seeing them#anyways !! the babes are in LA !!!!#except sunoo whom i love and miss so much :"(#hoping he's feeling better and will be mentally sending him hugs#black haired jake breathing the LA air is just <3#something about jake just screams cali boy to me#i hope all of them like cali and have time to enjoy themselves here#can't wait to see kcon content soon !!!!#will be spending the rest of my day by unwinding and catching up on the enha content from this week#weirdly i kind of miss jake on some level and i guess it has to do with not being able to be caught up the way i want to#guess this means i have to make a jake set later to miss him less#also looking at him and hearing him talk is just so healing to me#sim jaeyun my emotional support boy ♡#lastly i’ll be indefinitely using my queue for the time being as i get accustomed to my new job#hoping not for too long though#oh and to new followers !! hi and welcome !! so happy and thankful you're here !! please enjoy your stay on my blog#to those who've read up to this point tysm and hoping you're well ♡
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rocketthem · 2 months
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nvm I’m not done ☝️
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princeofyorkshire · 3 months
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part of me thinks i’m beyond fucked up the other part thinks i need to go on despite it all and everyday i have to fight and choose who to listen to. the first one is winning lately and it’s so fucking bad for me dude
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pussy-ache · 10 months
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probably should talk to my sister sooner or later
#i need to get myself to care first#my life is absolutely no different without her in it and like. that’s a hard pill to swallow#like i guess it’s the Point. that i should just let it go. but at the same time i honestly just don’t fucking care#like the ONLY difference is the fact that i’m now bearing the weight of elderly dogs by myself#and that’s probably a problem#her personality always drained me and i honestly can say that i probably did the same to her#but again i know that’s Not The Point#it just makes it harder for me to care lmao. it’s like trying to forgive my father. and i’ve been working on that one my whole fucking life#so basically she probably shouldn’t be holding her breath#cuz this whole time my parents have been taking care of the dogs i have been wracked with guilt#thinking about my moms shoulder and my dads knees and just how hard my dogs pull#and now that it’s been temporarily taken out of my hands for 1-2 weeks at a time i see it’s super convenient for my sister to not have to#i’ve had this shared responsibility with her for almost 12 years#this is the first time i’ve had a break (save when i went out of the country a couple times lmao)#so that means i now know how easily she’s choosing her own convenience over being fair with me#her entire point is ‘’this shouldn’t have anything to do with me anymore. they’re not even my dogs’’#like. what? how are they not YOUR dogs and MY dogs and MOMS dogs and DADS dogs. they’re THE FAMILY DOGS like what does that even mean#and then she goes and gets her own 10 pound looking ugly little kick me dog the size of our dogs head#no sorry apparently not ‘’our’’ dogs head#like jesus christ. i just do not have the energy to speak to her#like the amount of allotted energy i have every day literally just exists for work. bed. masturbation. and then work. bed. masturbation.#truly. i can barely function as an adult. she can wait until i have more energy to deal with the low empathy selfishness she exudes
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thecherrygod · 11 months
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i have a weird relationship with my grandma. i think we both try but we both tend to hit our limits. at least on my part im trying to not let it happen too often tho bc it does feel mean and unnecesary, and she is almost 90
now that one of my brothers is living with us again for a bit, even tho she loves him and he clearly is the favorite grandson, they are currently in a rough spot relationship wise, so im trying to be even kinder to her to try and not get her too down
......
and its a bit funny that every time i am a bit more patient she does the equivalent of giving me lunch money
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littleredwolf · 18 days
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Hungry Eyes
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader
Summary: The team overhears Nat and Y/N's 'girl talk' through the comms and feelings surface as a result.
Warnings: Suggestive content. Sex references.
Words: 956
A/N: I don't know what this is or where it came from, but if this goes down well I may write up something a little spicy for a part 2 *eyebrow wiggle* PART 2 CAN BE FOUND HERE
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“Bucky's done nothing but undress you with his eyes since you walked in,” Natasha's husky voice came over your earpiece and your eyes snapped to the super soldier on the other side of the room, your cheeks reddening to find him already staring in your direction. 
You let your gaze casually pass over him, playing the brief moment of eye contact off as a coincidence as you scanned the room for the mission, but your heart was pounding and you were sure he could probably hear it. 
“Doubtful,” you scoffed, though you couldn't ignore the tingle that travelled up your spine at the thought of Bucky finding you attractive. You'd had the hots for him for months, but your fear of rejection strongly outweighed your desire to tell him so you'd kept your little secret to yourself…and Nat of course. 
“Stop living in denial, anybody with half a brain can see how he practically drools over you every time he sees you,” Nat argued, and you rolled your eyes as you continued to survey the room. “Don’t roll your eyes at me, it’s true.” 
“Stop watching me, you know it creeps me out when I can’t see you,” you hissed, eyes roaming the crowd in an attempt to spot the redhead. 
“If you could see me, I wouldn’t be very good at my job,” she teased, and you resisted the urge to roll your eyes again. 
“Just hurry up and do your job, Romanoff - the quicker we finish and I can get out of this dress the better,” you stated, readjusting the silky garment that Natasha herself had picked out for you. It suited your cover well, but it was a little provocative for your usual tastes. 
“I’m sure Barnes would agree with you on that one…”
“As much as I’m enjoying watching Bucky squirm from this conversation, head’s up that this is an open channel,” Sam’s voice cutting in over the comms caused any reply you had prepared for Natasha to die on your tongue, the blood draining from your face as you turned to look at Bucky.  
The super soldier was no longer on his mark, but as you searched the crowd you caught a glimpse of him as he was making a swift exit. More than anything you wanted to follow him, to defuse the awkwardness and recover from the embarrassment of him overhearing Nat’s comments, but you stayed rooted to the spot, unable to leave your position. 
“Go,” Nat urged, as though sensing your inner turmoil. “Me and Sam have got this.”
A quick look towards Sam confirmed that he agreed, and you wasted no time in hurrying towards the same door Bucky had gone through moments ago. 
Surprisingly, he hadn’t gone very far, and you found him leaning against the wall in the foyer. Heat rushed to your cheeks as his eyes landed on you, and you smiled sheepishly as you approached.  
“Hey Buck,” you softly said as you reached him. “Sorry about what you heard back there - Nat was just teasing, she didn’t mean any of it.” 
“Didn’t she?” He asked, raising a single eyebrow. 
“What?” You frowned, unsure how to interpret his response. There was a way you wanted this to go, but you didn’t want to get your wires crossed and make even more of a fool of yourself. 
“You said she didn’t mean any of it, but how can you be sure?” 
He pushed himself off the wall and fixed you with an intense gaze, making your knees weak and your breath short. You didn’t dare look away - afraid that if you did, this moment would end. 
“I-uh…I don’t know what you’re getting at here, Buck…” you stammered, too dumbfounded to form a better response. You were very aware of how close the two of you were and the smell of his cologne and warmth emanating from his body was making your brain short circuit. 
“Then let me show you.”
There was no hesitation as he took your face in his hands and pressed his lips to yours, and you melted into him with a whimper. The sound gave him the encouragement he was looking for and he spun you round so that he could press you up against the wall, moaning into your mouth as you raked your hands through his hair. 
Everything around you ceased to exist and all sense left you as you gave into your desires, the feeling of Bucky’s hands roaming your body setting your skin on fire. You couldn’t believe this was happening, you’d never even let yourself hope that Bucky might actually feel the same, yet here you were, making out with him while his sizable bulge pressed up against you. 
Had Sam not cleared his throat over the comms, you were sure you’d have let the super soldier take you right there and then, regardless of the fact that you were in public and on a mission.  
“Channel is still very much open, guys,” he informed, and Bucky’s eyes widened in horror as he pulled away. You giggled and gave him a quick peck on the lips. 
“I’m not even sorry,” you told Sam teasingly, straightening up and readjusting your dress. You were aware of Bucky’s eyes on you and you looked up to meet his hungry gaze. 
“I can’t wait to get that thing off you when we’re finished here,” he blurted, and you bit your lip as heat flooded your core. 
“Then we’d better hurry up and finish,” you replied, taking him by the hand and leading him back to the main room so that you could get the mission, and later on your clothes, out of the way. 
PART 2
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redstarwriting · 11 months
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pda/general affection hcs | i.
ft. hobie brown & miles morales
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request?: yes
request: “Hiiii!!! I am absolutely IN LOVE with ur the clash series and I can't wait to see how it progresses!!! Could u do some pda/general affection hcs for the spider verse characters? I would love to see Miles and Hobie hcs but it's rlly up to whatever characters u would wanna write for. Endless thanks!!”
warnings:  language, cuteness, mentions of dying, mentions of injuries, mentions of throwing up, mentions of being overwhelmed
a/n: i love hcs lol this was actually how i first starting writing and it’s so fun bc i can be my sarcastic self without having to change any of it teehee, thank you for requesting anon! thinking of doing this for other characters to, what does everyone think?
i’ve made a pt ii. to this with gwen and pavitr if you wanna check it out!
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hobie brown | spider-punk
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pda
- he’s kind of a middle ground - not crazy about it - not against it at all - he just - hold onto your hats for this one - ✨he does what he wants✨ - ofc it also depends who’s company you’re in - if y’all are with Miles, Gwen, and Pavitr, he’s super comfortable and a part - of his body will always be touching yours - but it’s not like he’s goin out of his way to be like LOOK AT MY PARTNER - HOWEVER - if he’s ANYWHERE where there are authority figures? - *cough* miguel *cough* - he will just start to make out with you - LMAO - “Hobie, can you stop kissing your partner and listen to me.”   “No.”   “You’re aware of how rude you’re being?”   “Good.” - if you don’t like it ofc he won’t but he WILL be touchier with you in those moments - because it pisses people off - and he loves that - also if he felt threatened? - he’d probably get a little touchier than usual - but honestly he almost never feels threatened so who knows if you’d ever experience that - and if he did ever feel threatened he would feel better knowing that you always wear one of his studded bracelets - ppl will ask where you got it and you’ll be all - “Oh! My boyfriend Hobie!” - he loves seeing the hope drain out of anyone’s eyes when he appears behind you after that statement, he finds it so amusing every time - he’s only obsessed with a few things - like there is something he will ALWAYS do - he is OBSESSED and i mean OBSESSSSSEEDDD with having his hand in your back pocket - at all times - only if it isn’t around your shoulders (another obsession of his) - like y’all are going to one of his shows? - you enter with his hand in your back pocket - after gets offstage? - hand in back pocket - walking home? - hand in back pocket - sometimes y’all will walk instead of him picking you up and webbing back home JUST BECAUSE he wants to put his hand in your back pocket - he also LOVES using you as an armrest - if you’re short, he places his arm on your head like an armrest - if you’re average height, he’s still using your head as an armrest - if you’re tall or as tall as him he will climb a wall to use your head as an armrest - it gets you flustered and he thinks it’s adorable! - and eye contact? - he will keep his eyes trained on you at all times - he’s always looking at you - or else he’s looking for you - only looks away SOMETIMES when he’s talking to other people - “Hobie, I’m over here.”   “Yeah, I know.”   “So stop looking at them, I’m the one talking to you.”   “Yeah, but you ain’t the fittest person in the room so piss off, eh?” - that being said - there is something he just doesn’t do in public - he doesn’t hold hands - i do feel like he would hold pinkies with you upon request - but holding hands just isn’t his thing - in public👀
general affection
- THIS MAN HAS THE WORLD FOOLED - he acts all nonchalant about it - acts like he only does pda to go against societal rules - which he does BUT ALSO - he is so touchy - he isn’t clingy by any regard - but he LOVES being affectionate - just like the smallest things - every morning when y’all wake up in the same bed together and he wakes up before you (which is a lot bc he doesn’t sleep well) he will place a feather-light kiss somewhere on your face so he doesn’t wake you up - but like clockwork - he will do it - and after he will just lay there and hold you for a bit - even when during the night the two of you separate from each other he will always reach out for you during those times - and he will maneuver you back into his arms so he can just lay there with you for a bit - every time you ask him why he just tells you you make him a “bloody softie” - which yeah you do - but also - he gets scared when he comes home, you won’t be there - with his job that isn’t really a job and all, he gets so nervous that you’ll just be fed up with it and leave - or worse, you’ll be used as bait for him - bait which he would immediately take, of course - he even does it because he thinks about the possibility of him not coming home one day - and he wants you to feel like you were loved if that happens - he also just loves the little smile that comes to your face every morning - when you realize he’s done it again - and that is just ONE THING - he hates getting injured, but would lie if he said he hated getting patched up by you - when you’re cleaning his wounds with alcohol the two of you hold hands - he’ll squeeze when it stings and you’ll squeeze when you feel bad - so you’re kinda squeezing his hand the whole time - but you know how i said he doesn’t hold hands in public? - at home it’s a different story - watching tv? - hands are held - looking at the stars from the top of a building? - hands are held - throwing up after drinking too much? - hands are held - so is hair - and he rubs your back - you rub his - he adores back scratches (not when he’s throwing up just in general LMAO) - one thing he didn’t realize he loved so much until it happened was when he was sitting and playing his guitar on y’alls bed - just mindlessly finger picking some melodies - and you came up and sat behind him and put your head on his shoulder and wrapped your arms around his waist and kissed his cheek and just - stayed there - it made him melt - he loves it so much - he especially loves it when you hum along - even if you can’t hold a tune - it’s the most beautiful thing he’s ever heard he doesn’t care - you can expect him to be all over you the minute he gets back from being Spider-Punk - especially when he has a bad day - i could probably give more examples but this is already kinda long lmao oops
overall
- he LOVES affection - public and private - if he loves you, he’s gonna show it - he’s gonna scream it, literally and figuratively - everyone will know y’all are together - which he loves - but that’s not why he does it - he just loves you - and doesn’t care what other ppl think 🤭
miles morales | spider-man
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pda
- omg this lil man is so awkward - i’m far older than him and he makes me think of how nervous and awkward i was at his age when it came to any type of romance - so i can see him being SO unintentionally awkward in public - he tries so hard to be cool - but omg - the tiniest thing will go wrong and he’ll go from 😏 to 😟 - everything is the end of the world until you assure him it isn’t - like the time he saw you outside around Brooklyn Visions Academy and thought it’d be so cute to go up behind you and cover your eyes and say “guess who :)” - except it wasn’t you - you were across the street and watched it all go down - he literally made eye contact with you the minute he tried to be cute - the HORROR on his face - he was immediately apologizing to the random person he just did that to - in the moment you were so confused - but when you and him were in his dorm and he was flailing his arms around -and yelling in lowercase explaining it? - oh my god - hilarious - he was all pouty when you started laughing so you had to attack his face with little kisses to make him cheer up - one would have done the trick but he was grateful for all of the ones you gave him regardless - or the time he went to wrap his arm around your waist during lunch because he wanted to be all cute in school and you turned around as soon as he put his arm out and tried to walk and his sturdiness and strength made you literally drop your lunch tray and the food went everywhere - and there you were again in his dorm as he was flailing his arms around and yelling in lowercase apologizing because you just got new shoes and he ruined it and— - shut him up with a kiss, would you? - a display of public affection that always happens though is you’re always in his jacket - to the point where he has two of the same jacket now so you guys can be twinning :,) - “Look, babe! Same jacket!”   “Oh my god wait! We’re gonna be so cute!”   “I know, right? Pretty smart and cute of me, huh?”   “Very smart and cute of you, Miles.” - he also loves to have his hand on top of yours whenever he can - he’ll do it in class - if y’all go out to eat - if he’s sketching and you’re next to him - and holding hands in public is a favorite of his - it’s very tiny things that he does because every time he tries something big something goes wrong - like opening a door for you and motioning you to go in before him - and always being ready to steady you if you would trip (which happens more than he thought it would) - and always fixing your necklace that he bought you for your birthday (with the help of Rio) when the little clasp comes down in the front - he’s constantly staring at you with a dopey grin on his face - literally will get called out in class because he’s just 👁👄👁 - and then he gets all flustered  - but the smile you get on your face letting him know you like him that much will relax him - will go from “I’m sorry I didn’t mean to draw attention to you!” to “yeah, you like that? imma do it more then.” - he’ll also pretend to drum on you with his pencils when you’re near him - especially if he has his headphones in - he likes to play this game where you guess which one of his songs he’s jamming out to - sometimes he says you got it right when you get it wrong just to see you get excited - and he doesn’t necessarily mean for this to be a public display of affection, - but his constant drawing of you is frequently watched by other classmates - the only person who has successfully seen his bold moves of affection is Ganke, and he pretends to gag every time lol
general affection
- he’s such an affectionate boy 🥹 - like i said, Ganke is the only one who successfully sees his physical affection plots work - he’s much smoother when people aren’t around - and yes, he has shown you the shoulder touch - you did it to him once and he short-circuited - i’m so serious he accidentally shocked you - but then he hugged and kissed you for like 40 minutes afterward cause he felt bad - so it wasn’t too bad of an experience - but when it comes to physical affection in private, he’s worlds better at it - any time he plays video games, whether that be with you or Ganke, he has his leg over top of yours - He loves watching movies with you where you lay your head on his lap and he just mindlessly draws little shapes on your shoulder - he also loves having you laying on top of him while y’all cuddle - it makes him feel safe (and he gets to steal soooo many kisses from you) - you’re kinda like his very own weighted blanket but not even because his spider strength makes you feel like a feather - but it’s also an easy way for him to keep a hold of you and feel like he’s protecting you - he also loves to take you web swinging - holding you super close and taking you to a tall building away from anyone who can see y’all - he loves that - sometimes he’ll have like a whole picnic type date set up and y’all will just have a cute lil date on the top of the one world trade center - he also loves having you over to his place - his parents love you - and you love them - they make him keep his door cracked when y’all are in there together but it’s mainly because they love to peek in and see their son so in love - Jefferson took like 74 pictures the first time he saw y’all napping together - And Rio took like 52 pictures when she caught the two of you on the roof of the building and he was playing you a playlist he made for you - he does that a lot but that was the first time Rio saw it - she was ecstatic lol - he occasionally will just poke you for no reason - and by occasionally i mean he does it constantly - “Miles? Why did you do that?”   “Do what?”   “I literally saw you poke me.”   “No, I didn’t”   “…”   “…”   “I did, you’re just so cute, I don’t know.” - he also loves drawing on your hand - the back of your hand has constant Miles doodles - sometimes it’s stuff like the two of your initals in a heart - sometimes it’s Spider-Man - sometimes it’s just whatever was on his mind - but you love your constant Miles hand drawings - and he feels like it’s some sort of way for other people to know you’re his - but when he does it it’s so cute - cause he’s so gentle - and no one is watching - but you’re sitting there and just smiling as he creates a work of art on your hand and the playlist he made full of songs that remind him of how you made him feel the first time he saw you is softly playing in the background - he calls them temporary tattoos and one day you’re going to actually get one of the doodles tattooed on you somewhere - he’ll probably have a heart attack from how much he loves it but hey that’s fine he’ll recover - speaking of he loves to draw with you - he doesn’t care about your skill level, he just loves to be creative with you - he also is very much all about making sure you’re eating - getting enough sleep - prioritizing yourself above everything else - and if anything is ever bothering you - he is There - he will always be there and it’s very comforting - he just wants you to be happy all the time and does his best to do so - and you feel the same - so any time the responsibility of Spider-Man is too much for him - or when his parents get on him because he’s hiding half of who he is - you’re there for him - often times after he comes home from a long day of Spider-Manning he’s the one who is being held, but you’re fine with that - cause he can be vulnerable with you and he needs it
overall
- Miles is getting the hang of being in a relationship - he really does love pda but is so bad at it lmao - when he gets better beware - you will be a melting mess in public all the time - but for right now it’s just behind the scenes where he’s able to show how he really feels - give him all the hugs he needs ‘em
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feline-insolitum · 4 months
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i was gonna put this on a reblog to this post but i decided it needed to be its own post so here we go
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LOOK AT HIM!!!
most other trainers will be super badass or cool whenever theyre terastallizing their pokemon. but kieran just kinda stands there devoid of life. he looks like hes not even there. almost like he's just... dissociating through the whole thing
you can also see eyebags that his teal mask model didn't have. he's been working himself to the absolute bone to get stronger. another character (i forget who) even says hes been sacrificing sleep just to get stronger. its very obviously been taking a toll on him
but looking back on the battle as a whole, this wasnt even the only time where he looked dull and lifeless. for the entire battle, when hes not being dramatic on purpose, he just looks so out of it
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you cant look at these pictures and tell me hes mentally present. the left picture isnt even timed to make him look like that. his expression is like that the entire time hes giving that line of dialogue.
and again, you can see visible eyebags!!!
i think part of it is that hes imagined the battle against the protagonist so many times since getting back from kitakami that it's feels like it's already happened to him, and he's just reliving a memory.
maybe another part is since hes gotten back, hes just been battling non stop when he has the chance. to him its just another battle. initiate, defeat, get stronger. rinse and repeat. its so repetitive that half the time he doesnt even know who hes battling. i feel like thats the case here, maybe sometimes he forgets hes even battling the person that he became this strong to defeat in the first place
i think why he did this to himself is because of more than "just getting stronger". after everything that happened in kitakami: gaining a friend, only for them to lie to and betray him about the thing he loves most, then for them to get closer with his sister, who would consistently shut him down, then on top of it all, ogerpon chose us, and even in trying to battle us for her, we beat him.
that is a lot to have happen to you in just a couple days, so i think part of the non stop training is him trying to cope. in trying to make up for "being too weak", hes also trying to escape reality and forget that those things even happened. he looks so out of it for the entire battle because he is. thats why he has such a reaction when we use ogerpon against him in battle. because by doing that, were reminding him
this is all part of why he freaks out so hard when we beat him. aside from his whole complex of getting stronger specifically to beat us, its because hes already imagined beating us so many times that to him, it already kinda happened in his sleep deprived mind. its because hes won battle after battle since getting back from kitakami, so after being in this rinse and repeat cycle of battling and winning, us losing causes him to finally snap out of it.
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after the protag wins, hes genuinely confused that he lost. but he knew how strong the protag was going into this. i think its because, for the majority of the battle, due to not being mentally present, he forgot he was battling us.
this, as well as how often he wouldve imagined him beating us, explains very well how surprised and shocked and panicked he is that he lost. "this wasnt supposed to happen" because it was just another battle, and he wins battles. "this wasnt supposed to happen" because he already imagined him beating us so many times that it had to have been real, right?
and because this monotonous cycle he was in that was actively draining him of energy was broken by us beating him, everything that he hadnt had the energy to process since training is hitting him like a truck now. ogerpon, the betrayal, how he kept losing to us, how he just lost to us right this moment, its all too much and he cant handle it. and so he crumples to the ground and has a mental breakdown
i didnt mean to turn this into a whole character analysis on kieran but i have a LOT of thoughts on his character and how hes written
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saerins · 4 months
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[ ೀ pucker up, buttercup | itoshi sae ]
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ೀ content: female reader, fluff, sae and reader are adults, pet names (sae’s choice of words are stupid/idiot, calls reader ‘my girl’), alcohol, slightly suggestive at the end. | wc 1.5k | notes: okay did a very quick drabble for sae for christmas !! merry christmas to you guys <3
ೀ summary: being sae’s girlfriend is tough. there’s a lot of things he can’t make time for, and unfortunately this time, it’s you. but somehow, he always pulls through.
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it’s christmas eve and you’re at your company function, looking at the fruits of your hard labour.
the event hall is decked with christmas decorations; stockings lining the walls and corresponding to different names for everyone’s secret santa to gift accordingly, christmas lights surrounding every table, everyone getting their fair share of the catering you’d arranged.
“this is amazing,” your boss gushes as she excitedly throws her arms around you. she’s only a few years older than you, so it’s not all too surprising that she’s always super friendly with you.
“relax on the alcohol, okay?” you joke with her, smelling the liquor already.
she pouts at you, batting her eyelashes. “oh c’mon, are you still upset that your boyfriend couldn’t make it for christmas?”
you sigh, though you keep a strong front, smiling through it. being the private girlfriend of an international soccer superstar is tough; he has to miss holidays and special occasions and more often than not you can’t even get your calls through because he’s just that busy. you’d been excited for this year’s christmas though, because he had said he’d be able to fly back home this time.
but as it turns out, his manager—who so happens to love overworking him—has other plans. so all of that excitement just went down the drain. still, what else can you say to him other than good luck with it? you knew being his girlfriend was going to be tough, but it’s starting to take a toll after feeling like you barely exist in his world.
still, you stare at the message he last sent you.
i love you.
and you go soft. soft, because you know he means it. soft, because despite everything, you believe in the man you fell in love with. the one who gave you your first kiss back in high school, the one who’s so awkward that even initiating to hold hands last time had his entire face beet red. the one who never fails to assure you that in spite of the distance, he’s always still thinking of you.
you fiddle with your necklace, the promise ring sae gave you when you were back in high school sitting around your neck like it always has.
in between all the long distance arguments and the time differences and the i miss you, wish you were here with me, you still find yourself hopelessly in love with itoshi sae. even when your friends say they can’t imagine being in your shoes, even when numerous tabloids love to put models or athletes as your competition, you know there’s still no one else you’d rather be with than him.
“i’m fine, really,” you assure your boss, prying her off of you and then adjusting her so her arm is around your shoulder as you lead her to her stocking. “here, why don’t you busy yourself and see what your secret santa got you?”
you really just want to distract your boss so she wouldn’t accidentally end up throwing you a pity party. all you want to do today is to make it through it, spend the first hour of christmas day rounding up the party and then get home and sleep your day away. it’ll distract you from the absence of your boyfriend anyway.
as you watch your boss happily open up whatever’s in her stocking, you wonder if your secret santa got you anything. (of course, some secret santas are dicks and end up not getting their person anything.) so count yourself lucky when you open up your stocking to find both a gift and a card.
amused, you rip the card out of its envelope, your heart skipping a beat when you see that inside of it, there’s a picture of you and sae as high school kids, beside each other, his face deadpan while you’re grinning from ear to ear, resting your head against his shoulder. the message reads: i love you so much it’s stupid.
you’re still in shock but you open up the little gift box, maroon with a green bow on it. when you see what’s inside, you can’t help but chuckle.
holding it above you, under the light, you can see the words hey, stupid engraved on the side of the fake mistletoe before feeling a warm pair of arms wrapping around your waist from behind, cold lips catching you off guard as they press themselves against yours.
it fills you up inside, takes all the weight off your shoulders. you’ll recognise him anywhere, without having to look or hear, the way his lips feel against yours, how he holds you gently against him, laughing softly against your lips as you pull him closer to you by the collar.
never in your wildest dreams did you expect to see your boyfriend in japan, let alone at your work party of all places, and now here you both are, kissing under the mistletoe.
“woah relax there,” he teases you, pulling away but still holding you close.
he’s here, he’s actually here. his hair’s in a mess, and there are circles under his eyes, but he’s smiling. he’s smiling at you and he’s here with you and you don’t even feel the tears forming in your eyes because you’re too busy relishing in the moment.
“itoshi sae,” you call out to him, your hands patting on his body, his black coat and his scarf are real and he’s here—he’s really here. “i thought you were too busy to come back…”
how long has it been now since you’d last seen him? a year? perhaps longer? he’s been so busy nowadays that you wondered at one point if he would even come back to you at all.
sae sighs, holding your cheeks in his hands as he presses his forehead against yours. “i’m sorry,” he says tensely, shaking his head slightly. “i was away for so long, and i just…” his teal eyes stare into yours, both your eyelashes dancing against one another. “i missed you, and i just wanted to see you.”
you’re laughing in disbelief, still holding him close because you’re just that afraid that this’ll all be an illusion that might soon slip away. “and they just let you off like that? that simple?”
he presses his lips into a firm line, averting his gaze. “let’s just say that they weren’t happy about it but i’m the important one, so…” he smiles, genuinely, putting an arm around. “they don’t have a choice but to let me come home to see my girl.”
turns out, he’d called in a favour to your boss, asked her about christmas plans because he knew from your texts that you were in charge of putting it all together. and then he asked her to put the gifts in your stocking. and you laugh hearing about it, because you’re thinking of how your life could’ve gone a totally different way. you could’ve gotten into a relationship with someone else who wouldn’t do this much for you, wouldn’t make time for you, wouldn’t travel across the world and put their own things down all in the name of meeting you.
“what’re you thinking about, stupid?”
you look into his eyes, shaking your head. “nothing, it’s nothing, i just- i love you, itoshi sae.” you smile, and sae smiles too because he loves how your smile reaches your eyes. and he loves being the reason you smile so he’s going to keep being that—and he makes a promise to himself to make you happy for life. but maybe that’s a gesture for next time. right now, he just wants to spend the rest of the holidays with you.
the clock strikes twelve, and he steals the mistletoe from you, holding it up between the two of you again, wincing from how cheesy it is after he does it, earning a chuckle from you.
“merry christmas, idiot.” and he kisses you again, long and slow and completely oblivious to everyone else that’s there who are staring and clapping—half of them still in awe that the itoshi sae is here and half of them in shock after putting two and two together that he’s your special guy.
“so, you’re gonna be here till new years’?” you ask in between kisses.
sae nods, “at least, why?”
you grin, pulling him by the belt as you lead him out of the event hall. “think it’s time we get home and just spend it between the two of us, yeah?”
sae laughs, letting you drag him along, wondering whether by this time next year, will he be lucky enough to call you his wife?
but when he sees that promise ring he gifted you still nestling snug around your neck, he has no doubt. you’re each other’s for life. and you’re worth every single risk he has to take.
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determunition · 6 months
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i took the switcheroo week as an excuse to finally try my hand at some scrybeswap designs! got a bit carried away as you can see, i love doing character design so much
decided to keep their species/major design elements fairly consistent (e.g. grimora's makeup, mag being vague and indistinct, leshy having nonhuman legs, p03 only having one arm) while still switching up their aesthetics as needed; super happy with all of these as a result!
design notes for each scrybe under the cut! def open to any further questions or curiosities, i always think way too hard about characters while designing them lmao
P03:
scrybe of the dead: i went for a possessed tv vibe; he's still mechanical but those bones do have a living soul trapped in them...also shoutout to @squid-hug for suggesting the x-ray machine, i was very tickled by that lmao
scrybe of beasts: overgrown old bot was kind of a given for this one, but i was also thinking that the plants are part of what's keeping him running somehow
scrybe of magicks: the magic eye is the core powering that top monitor, and the two side monitors display what he's seeing with that eye at any given time
grimora:
scrybe of beasts: she's a witch! like a chill terry pratchett kind of witch, she works with a lot of herbs and such; also her makeup is meant to mimic blood drops
scrybe of magicks: magick grimora is more of a warlock type, her magic is a lot more sinister and she almost never opens her eyes (whereas her third eye is basically always open)
scrybe of tech: tech grimora is kind of a wacky machinist-flavored dr. frankenstein; she inscribes by writing on circuitboards!
leshy:
scrybe of the dead: this leshy is a gargoyle/vampire hybrid! i thought a mirror would be fun for him bc you can get two different cultural refs; medusa (bc stone gargoyle), and the idea that vampires don't appear in mirrors!
scrybe of magicks: i decided to make him a bird guy (kinda harpy-esque) bc he's basically a more whimsical baba yaga hermit; the baba yaga thing carries over from slavic folklore obvs. also he has polycoria!
scrybe of tech: tech leshy was super fun, bc he's steampunk! rather than animal legs i gave him digitigrade robot legs, but other than that he's the most like, normal human guy here probably lmao; despite his well-adjusted appearance though i still think he's got a bit of freaky wonk in him
magnificus:
scrybe of the dead: this one was very ring-inspired lol, got those clump of hair you found in the shower drain vibes
scrybe of beasts: bush magnificus real! i think he'd be a bit more quirky trickster fae in this form
scrybe of tech: one of my favorites; tech mag is an emaciated cyborg draped in so many loose cords and wires that you can't tell what he looks like anymore. a lot of those cords are connected to him, and he plugs them in wherever as needed! he also has a drawing stylus, making him just an average art student tbh lmao
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