#I hope you can hear me | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

andthebeanstalk · 11 months

Text

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need.#the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist.#the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28!#a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents.#they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong.#and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives.#you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead?#or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of.#no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow.#i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong.#just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

17K notes · View notes

zosanbrainrot · 1 month

Text

part 2 of Zoro in WCI

01 02

I tried to write something to sum up my thoughts on this, but then it got longer and longer and tbh I'm itching to write a fic set in this AU djjdkf I think I could develop on their inner feelings more than in the comic form

Before posting the first part I didn't realize people had such strong opinions on how this would play out lmaooo

imo, of course Zoro wants to fight Sanji, not with actual intent to harm (they threaten each other on the daily, come on), but because that's how they are together, how they communicate. He respects Luffy's decisions and their goal here, which is to learn what's really going on with Sanji, but he's gonna be pissy about it all he wants. They both have so many intense and conflicted feelings about this and neither has any idea how to resolve them. So they fight.

ofc yall are free to headcanon this interaction any other way you want <333

#hope you can hear the moment Sanji's heart shatters #you're walking the painful path you chose and then even this stupid marimo instead of playing your usual game of threats and violence #instead of making this easier for you he pierces right through your heart with the tiniest confession #I never hated you #but even if he didn't use to #he sure as hell despises every inch of you now #he must he has to #but this is what you chose #it is what you deserve #ANGST #PAIN #wci zoro au #obvi if I were to write it wouldnt write first person this just got out of hand #i love angst can you tell #zosan #i love keeping them in the 'what if maybe no he would never' hell #roronoa “i love you but I will take these feelings with me to the grave” zoro #blackleg “I need you to hate me because I simply don't deserve to be loved” sanji #rorona zoro #black leg sanji #sanji #zoro #my art #whole cake arc #whole cake island #one piece #one piece fanart

2K notes · View notes

willczek-art · 3 months

Text

NPMD Tarot - The Hierophant

Others from the series: The Devil, The Lovers, The Star

Symbolism + some WIP/alternatives are under the cut C:

My intuition put Grace as the High Priestess, but from what I've read it's more about spirituality and intuition, while the Hierophant is all about strong traditional beliefs and ruling/leading, so it fits her way better! :D

Left side/Beginning has the dance cancellation sign, since that was her mission and Max was her first victim, while on the right/Ending is Jason and the Black Book, her mission and source of power has changed.

Halo= superiority, holy mission, Red as a sign of danger/death to come (which is why the light it's only on the boys)

She's sitting on what's supposed to be the bleachers C:

Doodles:

#nerdy prudes must die #grace chasity #npmd #starkid #fanart #my art #tarot cards #tarot #school stuff #CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT?? I got to do this for school!! Which is great bc im not self-motivated enough to finish artworks like this xD #there are two more almost finished!! Any guesses who and for what card? 👀✨#and i have sketches/concepts for three more + back of the card that i didnt have time to finalise before end of the semester #also!! super curious to hear other interpretations than my own + if i messed anything up meaning-wise + what couldve been changed/added #since its a school thing and they may ask me questions about it etc #ANYWAY!!!#hope ya like it and even if you dont there will be at least two more #500

599 notes · View notes

poorly-drawn-mdzs · 4 months

Text

Call that a Cave Story.

[First] Prev <–-> Next

#poorly drawn mdzs #mdzs #wen chao #wang lingjiao #mianmian #wei wuxian #jiang cheng #I had to cut the comic with JC 'holding WWX back from fighting the Wen Assholes' but it is with me in spirit.#It reads (to me) a little bit like JC is scared of Core Melting Hand and wants to have an excuse to hold on to WWX for comfort.#As far as I can recall they are around 15-17 in this arc.#And a guy who can rip out your golden core? The thing we know JC truly puts so much weight upon that he feels meaningless without it?#Yeah that's pretty terrifying. I hope WWX hugs back (he will not)#I have a lot more thoughts on Wang Lingjiao and Mianmian but I will keep them for later.#WLJ is a character I feel got done a little dirty because she has a ton of interesting potential that gets pushed aside for Mean Villainess #Let's be fully honest. Wen Chao and Wang Lingjiao are *THE* characters the Protag of one of those 'Reincarnated as the villain!' stories #Set up to be assholes to the main character and meeting a horrible end in retribution.#Do you think MXTX thought about that? How Wen Chao is basically the original Shen QiugQiu?#Who's going to be the brave soul who writes A transmigrator in wen chao's body (accidently makes wwx fall in love with him) story?#Though If we are going with “any mxtx character sho dies transmigrates to another book” WHO is the transmigrator?#Hear me out. I think it should be Original Liu Qingge. I think he and wwx would make a funny duo and I want to see it so bad.#AND the contrast of womanizer Wen Chao VS 'What is a woman' LQG.

872 notes · View notes

couthbbg · 7 days

Text

Bianca Stone, “Artichokes” // x . x . x . x . x . x . x . x . x . x

#this was just an excuse to use all my fav close up sid shots #also making it did make me feel better #can't wait for next season :)#also plsss read Bianca Stone she is so amazing #i am not immune to text over images #hockey edits #hockey poetry #web weaving #pens #sid #pens lb #<- tagging only bc i made this as a last game of the season happy celebration & i hope it brings y'all happiness too <3 #ok editing to add the link to the poem too bc you can hear her read it and i lovee her voice ok i'm done #my edits

182 notes · View notes

carnivalcarriondiscarded · 5 months

Text

yeah so i'm falling for @weevmo's Guys... they're so neat! i dig their vibes and can't wait to see what Corduroy Stew is all about <3

#fuckkkkk theyre so SHAPED!!!#i can feel myself getting So attached #if anything happens to them... i will simultaneously wail and cheer #nimrod is so cute. nimmy. the nimster. id love to toss birdseed on the ground for him to peck at. pigeon coded tiny man #lulu being a sock puppet trainer THATS SUCH A NEAT IDEA ARE YOU KIDDING IM OBSESSED #now im curious as to if sock puppets are like Animals or if they're as sapient as the others...#but yes im already looking directly at lulu she seems Fun as fuck #oughhhhh and wb. listen. Listen. im a sucker for handsome Head Empty characters and he seems like one of those #i also like characters with many hidden internal problems and wb seems like one of those too <3 #i hear that the three of them are siblings and that is Such catnip to me...#scribble garnish #dont know what else to tag this as! huh!#BUT YEAH THIS ALL SEEMS NEAT THEYRE COOL i Will be following this project to see where it goes #so far it has great characters a sprinkling of Intrigue bomb art (which. ofc it does its weevmo cmon guys)#and a neat song that i sweAR TO FUCK REMINDS ME OF SOMETHING. THIS HAS BEEN BOTHERING ME FOR DAYS #the jingle is just vaguely familiar enough to make me Writhe in the agony of Unknown Knowns #but yes! i hope you all go check out weevmo's blog if you havent already! Good Stuff All Around!!

314 notes · View notes

luna-lovegreat · 4 months

Text

It's all "links meet aus" and "zeldas meet aus", but where's my "companions meet aus"?

I wanna see midna bash fi and navis heads together for annoying her

I mean can you imagine the sheer chaos of all the Zelda companions meeting and going on a journey together? They're all companions/guides! One of thems a talking hat for hylias sake how are they supposed to take initiative?

I think it'd be like Lu where they all just meet up, but can you imagine the chain just somehow finds out this happened (and twilight is just like guys I am so sorry about midna) (but they're also really oddly touched that all their friends met each other too)

Pretty sure midna would be the sort of leader, since the last time she was in a foreign world she just found the nearest dude and started ordering him around. By like halfway through twilight princess she was literally asking LINK to accompany her to get what she needed.

But like. 90% of the group would be fairies. Which can't heal. One is a talking hat who just needs a head? He can't go on midnas cause she throws him off with her magic hair, poor ezlo is just trying to keep up.

They also have these weird green shadows who come around? They don't talk, but there's a rock, a fish, a bird, and a lady who just appear and stab things and shoot wind water fire and lightning.

Also midnas really confused why wolf link just shows up and kills things every now and then (from botw amibo)

Fi is the one who can talk to Hylia and awaken memories and get guidance and information or whatever, but she only does this by ballerina dancing and the others are always pissed at her anyways "WE DONT KNOW WHAT BATTERIES ARE OR A WII REMOTE WILL YOU PLEASE GO BACK IN SWORD FORM ALREADY" "I detect there is a 90% chance you need a key to open this door" "wow. Your perception is unparalleled fi."

Also there's a boat. A boat. Who is also good at taking charging since he's a king, which causes some friction between him and midna, since she has to grab him by her hair to move him half the time.

And with the fairies. Again. They all offer advice mainly. And with the fairies a lot of their main role is speaking and getting attention and pitching in? They come on an intersection and there's a chorus of bells all shouting the same directions. Ezlo is trying to cover the kings ears from his place on the boats head

Also there's this ghost/spirit of Zelda that everyone just feels REALLY strong loyalty to. But she's just like this kid who wants her body back?! They try to protect her but she can turn into a purple knight and stab things so there's that. I think there's also some animal companions from ooa/oos so.

Side quests are nonexistent they don't care about a village or gathering frogs for a kid they are there to save the world on a mission linear plot it is

And it's interesting because you have so many of them who just vanish and then appear to give loud advice. All at once. And the fighting skills basically fall to those weird green shadows that shoot various elements and fight and randomly disappear. Midna and spirit Zelda can fight, and Fi can too (kind of like how she fights as a sword in hyrule warriors). Also up to you if midna is drop dead gorgeous or devilish imp.

By the end they find whatever enemy so they can go back and midna is so pissed by this point that she hears the word "batteries" from Fi and goes full on fused shadow and just obliterates the jerk

***I have not played all the games so do not know or understand all of the companions and probably got some stuff wrong

Bonus: there is a child in a village named Link who does not have the spirit of the hero. He is stalked for three days until Fi decides his vibes are off and they all stop telling him he's the chosen one

206 notes · View notes

snorpdawg · 6 months

Text

Autistic Headcanons: Wambus Troubleham (Bugsnax, 2020)

“I must look mighty foolish stickin' to my guns like this. But you don't give up just ‘cause things get tough. If nobody else believes in me, I gotta believe in myself.”

#bugsnax #wambus troubleham #bugsnax wambus #autistic headcanon #autistic headcanons #actually autistic #actuallyautistic #gif set #gifset #gif #🛠️.gif #to be totally honest I’m not super happy with the formatting #but this is the least horrible it looked so what can you do?#why is he looking to the left in half of the gifs… wack #I hope you guys know I fought for my life looking for good playthroughs for the ‘meltdown’ gif #I had to hear ‘y’all want Triffany back so bad?! go find her yerself!’ so. many. times #every day is hell… woe is me #this beast has been in my drafts since July and I only finished it now. um. whoops?

386 notes · View notes

morganbritton132 · 1 year

Text

Eddie is on live, playing guitar in his home studio and talking to his audience about his creative process. The door opens behind the camera and you can see Eddie perk up before you hear Steve say, “What are you doing? Let’s go.”

“What?”

“Eddie Munson, do you want to get laid or not? Let’s go,” and then claps his hands like a dorky basketball coach.

Eddie’s just like, “Yeah, shit. Let’s go” and then just leaves. He comes back for his phone like two hours later and sees that he’s still live and is like, “huh” before ending it.

<- Last Post | Next Post ->

#before they’re out of earshot you can hear Steve say what did you think I meant when I said I wanted a back rub?#I thought this and it made me laugh out loud so I hope you enjoy it #eddie munson #steve harrington #eddie munson tiktok saga

2K notes · View notes

l3irdl3rain · 12 days

Note

wow Persephone, you get TWO thyroid tumors? save some for the rest of us,,,,,,

(I hope her tumors are manageable/treatable! good luck to you and the little lady)

She is SO special. Also I am going to use your ask as an info dump. As always, I have no actual formal education. So this is what I know from my job / from talking to doc. So don’t take my word as law for any of this bc I may have gotten some things mixed up.

Surgery is an option actually, but only for one tumor. When he takes out the thyroid tumor he also ends up removing the parathyroid. She needs to keep at least one of those, which is why he can only remove one tumor. I also could probably find a specialist who could remove both tumors and leave both parathyroids intact

The tumors are usually begin, but we’d send it out just to make sure it really is. And before we do surgery we’ll want to do bloodwork as well as take chest radiographs and make sure she would A) survive surgery, and B) not be putting her through a surgery when she’s only got a month or two left to live.

#the ‘vet records’ that the shelter gave me aren’t actually vet records #they’re just vaccine records #so I’m HOPING I hear back from them and they send me some actual bloodwork results so I can compare where she’s at now VS when they did it #but also I have adopted from enough shelters to know that they often don’t want to give you real records for whatever reason #ask #Persephone

103 notes · View notes

marshmallowgoop · 7 months

Text

I combined footage from my Detektiv Conan Blu-ray with audio from my Case Closed FUNimation DVD and made an HD English dub clip compilation for Episodes 57-58, "The Holmes Freak Murder Case."

#detective conan #case closed #video #funimation english dub script #i wasn't actually gonna post this video to tumblr because it's so long (because i have a lot of feelings about this case!)#but folks on discord liked it and i'm all about my funi dub propaganda so why not right?#the dub script here is just so fun--and does so well at making the dialogue *work* and sound natural in english #and has so much flavor! it does arguably too much in terms of creative liberties but things like #'can i really trust what a kid saw?' of the sub translation compared to 'and what were you smoking before you ran out there?' in the dub #are much more enjoyable to me #(other fun phrasings: 'the one who's always hangin' around you guys' (sub) vs. 'the little-bitty one with the great big brain!' (dub))#(and 'of course not! the reason i applied for this tour was 'cuz i thought i might find kudo' (sub))#(vs. 'who me? no no no. actually i signed up because i was hoping to run into jimmy here. but i guess i'm out of luck' (dub))#(and so many more! this script just has so much character)#and while it is a shame that the dub eliminated heiji's accent i do like the changed line ('i know it's you!')#'cause you've met shinichi *once* heiji lol #but yeah this is a fun case! i'm really happy to have finally hd'd the funi dub for it :')#one of my favorite things about the funi dub is that jerry jewell (shinichi's va) voices conan's thoughts #and it's so nice to hear *shinichi* and heiji deducting together (and the way they finish each other's thoughts and vibe... it gets to me)

335 notes · View notes

uncanny-tranny · 2 months

Text

Passing as a trans man is a nuanced and complex topic, but one thing I have been noticing as somebody who is a cis-passing (white) trans man is the way I'm treated when there is conflict.

I've noticed that in conflict, people are almost meek around me, willing for me to try working with them up until a woman is involved. When a woman (or, really, anybody who the other party assumes is one) is part of the conflict, they direct all their anger and rage to them. It's fucking insane the way a woman is treated when there is conflict, even if it isn't her fucking fault. These people are fundamental cowards for seeing my manhood as the only reason they can't be openly hostile to me, but it reveals a lot about how a misogynist thinks on an almost primal level.

I'm watching the women and people around me I care about being torn apart by people, and that's unacceptable. I can't sit around to watch it, and I don't want to do that. I need other people to perhaps read this and remember to not stand by if there is something that you can tangibly do to help, even if it's to lend a listening ear or let the person vent.

#feminism #misogyny #misogyny tw #before writing this i was worried about my blood pressure because i'm fucking angry #i hate the way cowards will look at me and see a man and be scared of me until they see a woman they feel strong enough to abuse #and i have faced my own experiences with misogyny and abuse now that i have transitioned and am recognized as male...#...like i had NEVER been catcalled until i medically transitioned. and now that i'm much more male i have been catcalled MULTIPLE times...#...which is why this topic is nuanced and complex and i hate this idea that we can bulldoze it down flat to 'make it make sense'#i want to always believe in people but i'm not a fool. i am not willing to stand around and just pretend like this shit doesn't happen #i WATCH this shit happen. i WITNESS it and HEAR it and i try to find some way to help the woman and/or person in question #and i know there's this aspect of white privilege in this where my white manhood is seen as a lesser threat #i can absolutely imaging a Black or otherwise MoC trans person not being given this level of grace from the get-go #i'm angry right now and i hope that my words are making sense. i want to address as much as possible but i'm sure you understand

100 notes · View notes

civetside · 4 months

Note

Man, thank you for making more Harrows. I'm so with that other ask that said it motivated them to push through their finals. I'm currently in my 2nd day and also drowning in projects. Seeing your Harrow always makes me smile and I swear is an instant serotonin booster. (the drawing also reminded me that i should probably sleep now haha). pls never stop making smol Harrow

#tlt #ask #thank you so much!!!!#im very happy to hear my sillay doods can brighten peeps day #hope your projects n everything goes/went well!!!!#god gave me these hands to pleasure women and draw tiny tlt doodles and i dont have a GF!!!!#sorry was that funny

146 notes · View notes

viperwhispered · 14 days

Text

Too Hard

Woop part 2 of the trip inside Jamil's head. Part 1 here.

The next time Jamil caught sight of you on campus, his first instinct was to turn around on his heel.

What a stupid thought to have because of you.

Besides, that would only make him more conspicuous, not less.

So, when your eyes met his, Jamil gave you a short nod in greeting. He would’ve left it at that and kept on his way, had you not walked up to him.

“Hi Jamil! How’s it going?” you said with that impossibly disarming smile of yours.

Why was it so difficult to look at you like he normally would? You had no right to make him feel so stiff, so unnatural.

On autopilot, Jamil exchanged a few pleasantries with you - those lessons from his parents had been instilled too deep in him for him to falter too badly in a simple exchange such as this. Still, Jamil quickly excused himself by telling you he still had to find Kalim before his next class.

Jamil didn’t miss the way your smile faltered. Had you hoped to get something out of him?

“Oh, okay. I’ll see you two later, then.”

Something about that irked him, though Jamil did not allow himself to dwell on it further.

His heart really had no business still racing as it did when he walked away, unaware of the frown on his face.

Just act normal. That’s all he needed to do.

After all, he had no time for dwelling in silly fancies.

If Jamil had been acutely aware of you before, it only seemed to worsen now that he was making a conscious effort to not act any differently with you. In fact, the harder he tried to keep you out, the more you invaded his thoughts, unsettling him.

The most innocuous words from you looped in his mind, and even the simplest actions caught his eye. For goodness's sake, he’d found himself staring at you while you were queueing up in the cafeteria the other day, not even doing anything other than standing around and looking bored!

For once, Jamil found himself grateful for all his duties. At least they provided him with something else to occupy himself with.

After all, if he was busy enough, it was difficult to think about those bright eyes of yours, your sweet laugh, or the way you bit your lip while thinking.

Still, sometimes it felt like no matter which way he turned, you were there, ready to throw him off-kilter. Not like it was his fault that often the most convenient route to class intersected with your daily routines. Or that your face seemed to jump out from any crowd, catching his attention.

Which certainly did not help his basketball performance. Jamil certainly did not recall you having such an interest in sports before, yet suddenly you were always there, distracting him. What had changed?

Could you possibly-

Jamil scoffed to himself, forcing his thoughts back on track for the nth time that day.

He picked up the tray of food and started taking it to Kalim. After dinner, he’d need to help Kalim with his homework, there were some housewarden tasks that would need dealing with, not to mention the preparations for the next-

Jamil froze in his tracks.

The voice he heard was quiet, but it was unmistakably you.

Really, it should not have come as such a surprise to him. You had become a rather frequent visitor to Scarabia, and Kalim often invited you to stay for meals. In fact, Jamil had started planning the dorm’s meal prep with your tastes and dietary restrictions in mind, just in case.

Jamil rounded the corner with strange exhilaration, his heart fluttering needlessly.

Yet, his mood evaporated when he saw you.

Why did you stop talking and look so guilty as soon as you caught sight of Jamil?

Jamil knew that look you gave to Kalim, had used it himself a thousand times. The one telling Kalim to keep quiet about something.

What could there possibly be that you would be comfortable sharing with Kalim, but not with him? That would give Kalim reason to sit so close to you, a comforting hand on your shoulder?

Jamil's mind raced with possibilities, yet could not settle for any single explanation.

He’d have to ask Kalim about it later.

Jamil gave you a short, polite greeting, his eyes lingering on you in an attempt to read what you were hiding.

“If I’d known you were coming over, I would’ve prepared something for you to eat as well,” Jamil said, already thinking about which parts of the dorm’s dinner to spruce up for you.

“Oh, no need, just figured I’d pop by. I’ll get out of your hair soon enough,” you said, something sheepish about your expression.

As expected, Kalim asked you to stay and dine with them, and with just a bit more persuasion you agreed - though not before telling Jamil that he should join you too and have himself a breather.

And since Kalim agreed with you, Jamil soon found himself sharing a meal with you and Kalim. Yet, even as he sat down with the food, his mind raced.

Had you been getting particularly close to Kalim lately? But surely Jamil would’ve noticed such a thing. Maybe someone from the dorm had been giving you trouble? But if that was the case, then surely you could let Jamil know about it, too. Unless for some reason you did not want to? But if it was something that concerned Kalim, then sooner or later it was bound to concern Jamil, too.

All the while, Kalim was talking to you about this and that, the latest topic being the animals kept on the Asim estate.

“I’ve got some pictures, let me show you!” Kalim said with an excited grin.

Only, a thorough patting of his pockets and a look around confirmed that Kalim’s phone was nowhere to be seen.

Jamil pinched the bridge of his nose. Where had Kalim left it this time?

Before Jamil even had the chance to say that he would handle it, Kalim sprinted off. Jamil hesitated for a moment, automatically halfway up from his seat, before he decided that leaving a guest unattended would be a worse offense than not helping out his master.

Jamil slumped back down with a sigh, mentally tracing the path Kalim took today, trying to recall the last time he saw Kalim handle his phone.

“Breathe. He’ll manage,” you said. There was the faintest of smiles on your lips, and Jamil could not decide if it was knowing or amused. Perhaps both.

Somehow, despite his frustration, Jamil’s own lips wanted to curl up too.

“Hmm. Maybe he will.”

Sure, Jamil could’ve called Kalim’s phone, to make it easier to find, but it was not that urgent, was it?

Jamil took another bite of his food, keeping an eye on you from the corner of his eye.

How was his mind so empty and so buzzing at the same time?

“You know-”

“So-”

You looked at each other, both just as surprised that the other had spoken up at the same time.

Even your surprised look was so-

“You first,” Jamil said. The way you bit your lip... Jamil had to raise a cup to his lips, slowly sipping his drink.

“Just… Feels like it’s been quite a while since I’ve seen you be still, you know. Or exchanged more than two words with you,” you said. You were attempting a light, joking tone, yet it was quite clear there was more to it.

“You say that like it would be unusual for me to be busy.”

He was not prepared for the way your soft sigh tugged at his heartstrings.

“No. It is not.”

You were both quiet after, poking at your meals. Normally, Jamil would’ve cherished such a moment of peace, yet this particular silence between you two was decidedly awkward.

Where was your usual chatter? Why weren’t you looking at him like you usually did?

“If you’re worried about me, don’t. I’m fine,” Jamil said, some softness creeping into his tone despite his best intentions.

“That's what Kalim said too,” you said. Yet the way you looked at Jamil made it clear you were still skeptical.

Wait.

Had you clammed up earlier because it had been Jamil you had been talking about with Kalim? That Kalim had comforted you about?

The thought twisted his stomach into knots.

Hasdhfsdf the way I fought with that last scene I swear. I don't even want to know how many versions I went through, trying to figure out how to say what I wanted without rubbing it into your face or making it too veiled. The joys of trying to convey things through a limited pov. Hopefully it came out reasonably balanced in the end. Rip to all those sentences that were lovely on their own but didn’t work for the whole. Hopefully I can rehome y’all one day. I do have thoughts for part 3 and part x (might be some chapters between those two as well, who knows at this point), so maybe we'll see those at some point, too. Tag list: @colliope @crystallizsch @diodellet @jamilsimpno69 @jamilvapologist @twstgo If you'd like to be tagged for future works, let me know! (Just be aware that sometimes I do also write nsfw, though you can certainly ask to be tagged only for particular kinds of works.)