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#I just know that I’m tired of playing games like this
russo-woso · 3 days
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hi, do you write for Niamh Charles? if so, maybe one where reader makes her debut for England and scores the winning goal but then ends up injured pretty badly in the game and Niamh realizes her feelings for her?
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Yes, I do write for Niamh! I love Niamh, except for the fact she plays for Chelsea, but anyways, here is I really really like you.
I really really like you | Niamh Charles
Warning slight injury, and just Niamh being protective.
Over the past two weeks, the only thing you could think about was England camp.
You had received your first England call up from Sarina for the matches against The Netherlands and Scotland.
You knew it was bound to come at some point. You had been playing exceptionally well for Manchester City and England’s U23.
At just age 22, you were Manchester City’s first choice as CAM.
You were excited to be playing with the seniors, the feeling of being at a sold out Wembley, but also to see a certain defender.
Niamh Charles.
You had barely spoken to Niamh. You shared a few sentences, if you could even call it that, when playing against Chelsea.
You weren’t going to deny it, you couldn’t deny it because it was so obvious, you had a huge crush on Niamh.
From the way her hair falls when she takes it out in matches, to the way how her hand feels in yours when you shake hands.
You didn’t know why you liked Niamh, I mean, she’d never like you back. Would she?
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You travelled down to St George’s Park with the city girls.
It was a relatively easy drive down. There was no traffic, but as soon as you got there, you wish there had of been.
Your heart was racing.
Thoughts went rushing through your mind. What if you didn’t play good? What if Sarina made a mistake inviting you into the squad? What if you embarrass yourself in front of Niamh?
“Y/N, you coming?” Esme asked you as she started to walk inside, quickly stopping to look back at you.
“Yeah.” You replied, hesitancy in your voice.
“Y/N/N, you’ll do fine. I know it’s a big change and thoughts are running through your mind right now. But you belong here.” Esme told you, quickly hugging you before walking inside.
You followed her in, dragging your suitcase behind you.
You enter the lobby first, finding out who your roommate was.
You were roommates with her.
You grabbed your keycard, making your way up to the second floor, before lightly tapping it on your door.
It granted you access, and you walked inside hesitantly.
“Hi, it’s Y/N, isn’t it? I’m Niamh.” Niamh welcomed you into the room. You couldn’t help but notice how voice stuttered a few times when she spoke.
“Yeah, I’m Y/N, it’s nice to properly meet you. I feel like we’re always in such a rush after matches that I’ve never really met you.” You joked and Niamh agreed with a small laugh.
It was already late by the time you had gotten there so you were already tired and ready to get to sleep.
“Everyone’s going down to the relaxation room just now if you want to come.” Niamh asked, playing with the hairs on the back of her neck.
“I would but it’s been a long journey down here and I’m tired so I might just head to bed.” You explained, also stuttering some of your words due to being so nervous.
“Are you sure?” She questioned, just double checking, and you replied with a smile and a nod. “Okay, well, sleep well.”
With that, she left the room, the door clicking shut.
The only thing that replayed on your mind was the conversation, the way how your voice stuttered as you spoke to her.
She had to know that you liked her now, with the stuttering, the sweat that was starting to build up on your forehead.
After sitting in a silence whilst you thought back of your previous conversation, a small beeping in noice was heard from the door and it opened.
Niamh walked inside and you gave her a confused look.
“I couldn’t leave you here alone. Not when it’s your first night.” Niamh explained and you shook your head at her explanation, guilt washing all over your body.
“Niamh, no, seriously I’m fine. You go downstairs if you want to.” You told her
“Everyone down there’s boring. And anyway, we’ll be stuck with them for the next week so one night not seeing them will do me good.” She justified and settled herself on her bed. “I thought we could find a film to watch.”
And that’s exactly what you did. You both agreed on a movie and spoke the entire night.
The tiredness you felt completely went away as you spoke to Niamh.
You spoke, you laughed, you told stories.
It was safe to say that you didn’t just like Niamh anymore, you were utterly in love with her.
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The rest of the week sped by, with training taking up the mornings and then spending the afternoon with your new friends.
Over the week, You quickly befriended Alessia Russo and Ella Toone. The duo quickly becoming a trio.
You got along with them well and you spent most of your afternoons with them.
The week had sped by so quickly, that you were all currently on your way to Wembley.
On the way, Sarina announced the lineup.
Sarina didn’t read out your name but assured you that would definitely be subbed on later on in the game.
Niamh, who was sat next to you on the coach, cheered for you, and rested her head on your shoulder.
“I’m so happy for you. Your first England debut.” Niamh said, looking up at you.
“Thanks, Niamhy.”
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The team had down amazing to come back.
At half time, they were down 2-0, but with two goals in two minutes, they were now equal with the Netherlands.
In the 68’, Sarina told you and Alessia to take off your bibs.
You stood with her as she told you tactics she had picked up.
Whilst waiting for the ball to go out of play, Alessia stood next to you.
It was so cold that you were basically cuddled up to one another.
She congratulated you on my debut, patting you on my back as the announcement was made.
It was announced you’d be subbed off for Georgia.
She ran off the pitch high fiving you, before you ran on.
The game continued and there was still no goals come the 90’.
You had been playing incredibly, proving to everyone why Sarina had called you up.
In the first minute of injury time, Lauren James crossed the ball into the box and you were in a perfect position to run onto it.
Without taking a touch, you nutmegged the Dutch keeper and the ball ended up being in the back of the net.
Your teammates surrounded you, enveloping you in a hug.
Once everyone pulled away, Niamh pulled you in again.
“I’m so proud of you, Y/N/N.” She whispered in your ear.
“Thank you, Niamhy.” You said, using the nickname you’d given her.
You noticed her cheeks flush a light red and with the confidence you felt, you pressed your lips onto the red pig before running back to your position.
Two minutes later, you had another chance in the penalty box.
Lucy played a long ball into the box and you jumped to header it.
The next thing you knew, something connected with your head but it wasn’t the ball.
The Dutch keeper had jumped up to punch the ball away but instead, had punched you.
You fell to the floor limply as blood made it way from your nose.
You groaned in pain and your hand went flying to your nose and you head.
Alessia was the first one to you, crouching down and stroking your hair to comfort you.
Everything was blurry, you couldn’t think straight but all you could think of was Niamh.
All you wanted was Niamh.
Instead of going straight to you, Niamh marched over to the keeper, Daphne van Domselaar, and pushed her straight to the floor.
“Look what you’ve done to her! You fucking bitch!” Niamh shouted at Daphne.
You winced at the sudden shouting, the pain searing through your head.
“Niamh, I want Niamh.” You managed to get out to Alessia.
As the medics got to you, Alessia left to get Niamh for you.
Within seconds, Niamh was crouched down next to you.
She gently picked up your head, getting approval from the medics, and laid it in her lap.
You reached out for her hand, which she squeezed lightly.
“Y/N/N, you’re so brave. You’re going to be okay, I promise.” She said, tears running down her cheeks as she stroked your hair.
Your teammates gathered round, awing at you and Niamh.
They were certain that by tomorrow morning, you and Niamh would be a couple.
The medics put you onto the stretcher and lifted you upwards.
You watched as Niamh was taken aside by the ref and was given a red card.
Niamh accepted the red card. One, she thought Daphne deserved what she got, even if it wasn’t her fault, and two, she got to be with you whilst you were treated.
She ran to catch up with you and the medics, taking your hand in hers and walked towards the tunnel.
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“Why did you do it?” You asked Niamh once the medics had gone.
They had confirmed that you had a broken nose and a concussion.
“Do what?” Niamh asked back, giving you a sympathetic look as she looked at the stained blood on your face.
“Punch Van Domselaar. Get a red card. She didn’t do it on purpose.” You said and Niamh looked down at the floor. “Niamhy.”
“Please don’t call me that.” Niamh whispered, barely being able to hear herself, let alone you.
“Why?” Confusion took over your face, not knowing why she didn’t want you to call her that.
“Because it kills me to hear you say it when I know you don’t like me. It kills me thinking back to tonight when you were on the floor. It kills me to think about our late night conversation when I know that after camp, everything will go back to normal.” Niamh revealed and once more, tears fell from her eyes.
“Niamh, what makes you think I don’t like you back?” You asked, as her head jerked upwards, revealing her blue eyes, full of hope. “I’ve liked you since I played against you for the first time. The amount of times I’ve Instagram stalked you just so I can see your smile. It’s killed me knowing this past week that we’ve grown closer and closer but I’ll never be able to call you mine.”
“You like me back?”
“Of course I do Niamhy. Who wouldn’t? You are the most kindest, most beautiful, loving person I’ve ever met, with a hint of protectiveness…” you joked, referring to the events early tonight. “…Who wouldn’t like you back? Definitely not me. I really really like you, Niamh. I have done for a while.”
“I really really like you too.” She said, a huge smile appearing on her face as she inched closer to your face.
You could practically feel her breath on your lips as she stopped her movements.
You took the final step in connecting your lips.
It was so gentle, both of you too scared to move, trying not to overwhelm one another. And the fact you’ve got a broken nose.
“Y/N, will you be my girlfriend?”
“Of course, Niamhy.”
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ilwonuu · 15 hours
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-‘๑’- don’t you wanna? -‘๑’-
↬ kim seungmin
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ꙮ pairing- nonidol!seungmin x fem reader, established relationship,dom!seungmin x sub reader
ꙮ summary- your boyfriend loves for other people to hear how good he makes you feel.
ꙮ warnings- slight voyeurism(???)(, hyunjin, jeongin, and chan are listening to them…), unprotected sex (no one is surprised), dirty talk, seungmin is crazyzysyys, riding, hickeys, kissing, lmk if i missed anything
ꙮ a/n-literally no one asked for this.. i wrote this while high(im crazy while high) I HOPE YOU GUYS LIKE HAPPY 600💖💖
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seungmin has been playing video games all day you assume. as soon as you come home from work he’s at his desk playing. his eyes getting darker when he sees you come through the door.
“hi min.” you say as you lean down to hug him. he’s pulling you on his lap with a half smirk. “hi gorgeous.” his hands are wrapped around your waist now as you straddle him.
“how was work?” you shrug with a sigh laying your head on him. “tiring?” he asks you as he plays with some of your hair. you nod with a smile.
“i could help you relax.” he says loud enough for you and his friends on the call to hear. seungmin hears chan laugh nervously through his headphones. he moves one of the headphones off his hear as he hears jeongin voice.
“are you really doing this with us on the call?” you hear jeongin’s question through his headphones which causes you to shoot a look at seungmin. “that okay baby?” he asks you quietly.
“y-yea.” you don’t know why you agreed so easily. did you want his friends to hear you? maybe.. but seungmin loved the thought of his friends hearing your moans from him. you felt your body heat up at the thought.
“hyunjin is on the call too.” seungmin admits looking at you for your reaction. you nod taking your shorts off. seungmin’s smirk is just getting bigger.
he pulls his sweatpants down look at you take your underwear off. “come sit on it baby.” he shrugs his underwear down. you straddle his waist as you feel him line you up with his tip.
he fists some of you hair as you finally sit down on him. he is quick to start bouncing you up and down. “seu-min oh fuck-“ his mouth is sucking against your neck as he moves your hips.
you can’t hear any of the boys on the call but thinking about this hearing you, you got wetter and seungmin loved to call you out.
“you’re so w-wet shit. what are you thinking about huh? you thinking about how they can hear how i’m fucking you like a good girl? i bet you wish they could see you too huh? fucking slut.” your already unable to form words to respond.
“look at you. doing anything to take my dick. i bet you were thinking about this all day.” he teases you as he starts to thrust up into you.
“seungmin- too much!-“ he just smirks at you. “you love being fucked like a slut tho, huh? say it.” he grabs your face to look at him. “i-i love it! p-please.”
he smirks pulling you into a messy kiss. “ride baby- fuck just like that.” the three other boys are not sure what their reactions should be.
but their all obviously hard. your moans and obvious sounds of your arousal is filling the room. “you guys- shit hear her? so fu-fucking good.” he says the last couple of words while watching you go completely dumb on him.
“gonna cum slut? let go baby.” he’s guiding your hips along with his thrusts up. his thrusts hitting deeper. your eyes are rolling so far back, seungmin just watches you with a smirk.
“min- mm coming.” he just groans. “cum baby. fuuck- good girl.” he watches your leg twitch as you cum on his dick. “want my cum slut?” he asks already knowing the answer.
“please seungmin-“ his thrusts are fast and sloppy as he cums deep inside you. “shit- you take all of it- fuck baby.” the two of you trying to catch your breath. “let me get off call then we can shower?” seungmin asks you before you hear muffled voices from the headset.
“what are we supposed to say-“ hyunjin asks through the call with his voice sounding kinda shaky. “idk it was kinda hot.” jeongin admits with no shame.
“im getting off the the call. i’ll get on tomorrow.” your boyfriend chimes in. “uh bye-“ chan begins to say before you hear him cut the call.
“did you like it?” he asks as he slowly pulls out of you. “of course-“ he’s cutting you off with a kiss. “i knew you would. let’s go shower.”
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sturnlova · 1 day
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Jealous for attention
( Matt Sturniolo x Female reader )
( Warning : Smut, fluff, angst, bit long i got carried away 😭 pet names )
Matt : Blue
Y/N : Pink
Chris : Orange
Nick : Purple
( Word count : 1.6k)
@blackhorses-posts i hope you like ❤️
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Me and Nick have been best friends for over 7 years. We first meet in high school and soon became closer, of course getting closer meant being friends with his brothers, it was a packaged deal. But little did i know that i would start dating the middle triplet Matt.
All of us were very close, i even moved to LA with them and i still live with them which means we are always together or with each other. Like no other day we were all huddled up on the couch, My upper body laying on matt’s lap and my legs spread across Nicks. I hear Chris tease me by asking if i have enough room, i snapped my eyes to him and gave him a death glare.
As time went by and my hunger grew stronger i asked Matt to get food for us. Matt groaned a bit before moving my body up to sit me down on the couch to grab his keys.
“Y/N get up babe we have to get food” soon as that sentence left Matt’s mouth nick pounced on me and spoke for me.
“Me and Y/N want to stay home we are so tired today take Chrisss” Nick made sure to drag the S. Chris looked at both of us hugging on the couch and than looked at his brother who had jealousy and sadness in his eyes. He realised Matt is gonna throw a hissy fit if he doesn’t go. Chris got up and walked to the door to get the food for the princess’s.
Once me and Nick heard the door close and lock Nick grabbed the control and played icarly well we hugged on the couch to entrain ourselves until they got back. After 15 minutes me and nick started getting impatient so i decided to take matters into my own hands and message Matt.
| To Matty B 💓💓:
Matty!! How far are you?! me and nick are so hungryyyy
| From Matty B 💓💓:
B there soon.
I showed nick our conversation because he was acting so dry and weird for some reason. Nick looked down at me with a confused look “ His probably just trying to stay focus on the road Y/N it will be alright.” I trusted nick’s word as his my best friend.
As 10 Minutes passed me and nick finally heard the keys jingle to open the door. Chris walked in with the bags of Mcdonald’s and placed it on the table and yelled “come eat!!” Me and nick jumped to the food bags and started scavenging through the bag to get our food and return to watch icarly. Once we successfully got our food and got comfy on the couch Matt walked in and stared at me before placing the keys on the table and heading upstairs.
I turned my head to Chris and asked what’s wrong and if i did something wrong, Chris just shrugged his shoulders and mumbled under his breath that Matt was quiet the whole car ride. I felt tears start to brim around my eyes, i know it sounds dramatic but i’m an overly sensitive person when it comes to hurting someone i just feel so guilty.
As me, Nick and Chris ate i struggled to keep focus on icarly and eating the food as i was concerned for Matt. A couple of minutes later i stood up and slowly walked my way with my plate in my hand to place it down on the marble bench. I told the 2 boys on the couch that im going for a nap, they all hummed in response as they were so fixated on the food and show playing.
I watched as my feet went one by one up the stairs making a slight noise well heading to me and Matt’s room. I entered the room and saw matt sat on his gaming chair. “matt you okay?” i asked nicely and i got a negative response instead “i’m fine.” ok i see how it is. I laid on the bed and just watched Matt on his phone ignoring me, he was never like this he was always huddled up with me or talking or just listening to me talk.
I decided to start talking and all the response i got back was “mhm” “cool” “yeah” what the fuck is up with him all i wanted to do was spend time. “ Matthew what’s wrong you have been rude and ignoring me since i asked for food! if u didn’t want to go u could’ve said something instead of being a bitch!” by now i had tears running down my flushed cheeks.
“Christ are you crying ? oh i’m so sorry baby i never meant to make you cry it’s just that i felt i don’t know.. jealous of nick i know it sounds stupid because his my brother but i just felt like i didn’t have any attention and i was jealous for attention and i didn’t know how to say that i just wanted to spend time with you.. im so sorry.” i looked at matt as he reached his hands out to my face and wiped my tears.“ i’m sorry Matt that you didn’t have attention my love, you don’t have to be embarrassed to ask to spend time with your girlfriend, you have to speak to me.”
Matt moved his body to me and pulled me to a tight hug, once he removed his body from mine he kissed the corner of my eyes as a small way to say another sorry. I pulled matt into another hug again, he tapped the side of my thigh in a way to say jump, i did what i was told and jumped for my legs to be around his waist along with my arms wrapped around his neck. He started kissing my neck and spots behind my ears to make me fumble.
He walked us forward which is backwards for me and laid me on his brown silk bedsheets, he slowly took off my blue fresh love sweat pants and my white lacey underwear, he than dragged his cold fingertips up my body and cupped my breasts and pinched the nipple and massaged my breasts.
“Matt please fuck me i need to feel you” “fine only cause u deserve this” He slowly moved his middle finger to my hole and started curving it; it didn’t take me long to feel my orgasm creeping up on me but Matt also noticed this so he pulled his finger out of me.
“ what the fuck matt i was about to finish.” “ hey watch ur tone with me “ i shut my mouth and spread my legs as wide as they could go. Matt licked his lips and stepped out of his sweet pants and his red boxers. His tip was a raging pink with pre cum coming out of it, he moved his palm to my cunt and got my wetness on his hand to stroke himself.
Matt adjusted my legs on his shoulders and added his length to me, i could feel the stretching and burning sensation; we’ve had sex before but he was big so i never got used to it. Once he was fully in me, he started moving in and out of me at a rapid past. I was blown over pressure, my knuckles turning white due to the fact i was gripping onto the bed sheets, i moaned loud forgetting Chris his brother and Nick my best friend who is also his brother are home.
Matt looked down at his dick slipping in and out of me and the bludge in my stomach. He locked eyes with me and moved his big hand over the bludge and pressed down on it, this made me feel intense amount of pleasure. “ Matt fuck please i need to cum let me cum daddy please fuckk” “fuck Y/N i’m gonna fucking cum in you, gonna put a baby in you, fuck fuck fuck cum with me” with Matt’s last words “cum with me” i did, i let my whole body release and go limp as i came all over his cock.
Matt released same time as me and slowly pulled out of me making me hiss as i suddenly started feeling empty. He rolled over to lay to the side of me and kissed my check. “ i’m sorry baby that i was acting like a arsehole” As he spoke he rubbed his thumb over my cheeks, “it’s okay matt just speak to me, i love you let’s go get clean.”
5 minutes after matt rolled out of bed and carried me to the toilet, he placed me down and told me to pee. Once i peed and wiped, Matt put on boxers and sweatpants and put my underwear and his sweatpants along with his black top that was too big for me. He kissed my temple and asked if i wanted to go back to the couch, i nodded in response as i was tired.
As we walked down the stairs we heard Chris moaning and Nick telling him to stop cause it’s gross. Me and Matt side eyed eachother and faced Chris, “Chris why are you moaning.” “oops sorry we were making-“ Chris got cut off from Nick saying Chris was making fun of Y/N for moaning so loud. Matt and I giggled before sitting on the couch to watch Icarly to end the night.
thank yall for 200 followers and the crazy amount of likes 💓 i can’t even express how grateful i am, i know it doesn’t sound it but I’m not very good at saying how i feel but i love y’all so much ❣️
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jean0farc · 19 hours
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claiming the jackpot.
// warnings
non-canon compliant, a bit out of character. yandere. relationship inexperience. implied noncon.
// author’s note
Aventurine’s a little out of character for this imagine. There’s not much content of him on the wiki and I’ve been itching to write some stuff about this guy since he’s pretty new to Star Rail.
»»————- ♡ ————-««
Aventurine has always been pleased with the idea of claiming prizes he deemed rightfully his. Toying with the minds of others was what he did best; besides, what is there to satisfy him more than winning a game of chance? Gambling has always been his best feat, but moreover, he wasn’t the type to easily throw a fit over his losses in the heat of the game. In fact, these challenges and obstacles to this game of chance was what made him all the more feisty and insistent.
When he met you, he began staking out his claim like a panther and insisted you to be respectfully his and only his. Months into the friendship, you always showed signs of naivety since this was not a situation you had adequate experience around. Aventurine was unlike other men around. He treasured you, spent time with you, made you feel beautiful, loved, and appreciated for doing the bare minimum. Despite all this, you grew tired of his antics considering you weren’t actually ready for a serious relationship.
“He’s always this vibrant” — you thought. And you were right. He always displayed exemplary behavior when dealing with colleagues and members of the Astral Express. That was just a part of his charm. You chose to look at the big picture and imagine how your experiences with Aventurine would turn out provided you said ‘yes’ to his will of wanting to lure you in. But that wasn’t enough. You needed to dig deeper into the core of his being and sense any form of red flags in him while it still wasn’t too late.
There are many layers to Aventurine’s self — one that’s charismatic, friendly, and outgoing. Yet that’s just a tip of the iceberg according to your family and friends. What he hid from the masses, was what he displayed right before you at this very moment. A pissed, sarcastic Aventurine filled with pride and deceit.
The question remained in your thoughts — was a relationship with this shady, questionable man really worth pursuing?
There’s not enough chemistry between the two of you, was there? If you observed anything from the man himself, it was that he developed an addiction for gambling, playing games of endless possibilities and luck. And god knows what he does to his most precious jackpots.
You, a prize in his eyes, felt an overwhelming sense of urgency to run from his touch. Sure, he was polite enough to lend you some money for your college fees. But such treatment just wasn’t worth a reason for you to pursue hooking up with him. Before you could face Aventurine head on, he lifted you up bridal style, shoving you on the mattress with your face first. There’s not much you can do right now.
Sure, he was glammed up in luxurious jewelry and sported handsome, youthful features. He could spoil anyone he held dear for he had the gold to do so. But something wasn’t right. This relationship wasn’t right. It just felt so out of your control and the timing was off. But he didn’t stop.
Your mouth eventually complied with his tongue. Aventurine guides you through the whole process of pulling you in, claiming you as the grand prize of tonight’s game. It’s not as if you could resist any of his advances from now. He’s got millions of eyes glued upon you just like he had millions in his pocket.
“Beautiful. Such an eager little sweetheart. I’m going to take you nice and deep, and you’re going to be a good doll for me, yes?”
“N-no!!! Please, let me go!” you pleaded. Pled till your throat ran dry. You struggled against Aventurine’s strength as you shook your head from left to right, indicating your resistance towards his touch. “I swear, I’ll do anything, just please, let me go! I’m sick of our relationship being this way!”
“Ah, ah, ah, better watch what you say, little one. Those who seize the night may be out to get you, yet none of them went the extra mile to actually express their love for you.” Aventurine chuckled condescendingly. “From this day onward, you’re going to regret leaving me.”
Against your will, you felt something similar to a sword hilt impale you like an uppercut, It was Aventurine’s length stretching every last bit of your sanity, hell, even your pride.
His moans. You couldn’t get enough of it. Despite being naked and restrained in his king-sized bed, you felt his body heat radiate in front of yours, feeling the friction of his thrusts that grew guttural as time passed.
“Hah. I’ve been addicted to the art of gambling for quite a long time now, and it’s been a long time noting how……fascinating it is to actually claim the most precious prize of them all…..All of it, as mine.”
“I’m not yours! Ngh!” you exclaimed, stifling a moan.
“Yes, my dear. Yes, you are.” Aventurine sneered. “One of these days, you’re going to get used to this. Used to having my eyes set upon the fragile, feeble you. I’m going to meet you in that beautiful afterglow as I make this relationship the best you ever had. And that time….is tonight.”
“It would be better if you just do as I say. Otherwise, I’ll just find more ways to sneak up on you and make you mine.” he added.
With that, he, once again, pressed his lips onto yours, shutting you up for the sake of shutting you up.
And there he was, plainly confessing his undying love (and lust) for your presence as a lovely jackpot.
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shuashuagirl · 1 day
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The Most Dangerous Game
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Title: The Most Dangerous Game 2k+ words
Summary:
You two know you shouldn’t do it. But here you were. Doing it anyways. Playing the most dangerous game that two exes could ever play.
Warnings: dubcon (because why not ok), impact play, degradation (because I am unwell), creampie, very unprotected sex (wrap it if you’re going to tap it), spit kink, lots of fluids, very mean jeonghan, toxic toxic toxic, very rough sex
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You and Jeonghan knew that you were playing a dangerous game. It wasn’t healthy for you two to still be friends. Not after the breakup. Not after the months that you two had spent arguing with one another, mentally tormenting each other until finally you had both agreed that you would be better off if you went your separate ways-
But going separate ways was much easier said than done when you two had shared a friend group since your freshmen year of college.
And the exposure. The loneliness. The urge to find anyone to sleep with and grasp at any semblance of a relationship was too alluring for the two of you to even try to evade.
“Can’t here,” you breathed in, as Jeonghan pressed you into the wall. He rolled his eyes at your comment, his fingers dipping under your shirt.
“Can’t?” He asked you. You shivered as his cool fingers met your warm stomach and you leaned into his touch. He laughed at the obvious way that your body reacted to his touch.
“They’ll hear,” you pleaded lightly.
“So, we can’t?” Jeonghan pressed again. His fingers began to dip under the waist hand of your pants, his other hand coming to pin you against the wall by your hips. “Or you won’t?”
You bit down on your lip, eyes rolling back as Jeonghan’s fingers found your clit, and your soaked pussy.
“Cause it seems like you do want to.”
You groaned, your fingers wrapping around the part of his arm that you could hold.
“I- Want to,” you agreed with a nod. You decided you needed to rephrase. “We shouldn’t.”
“If we shouldn’t then why have you been acting like a clingy whore since you got here?”
You wanted to disagree with him, but his condescending tone was going straight to your core. You shook your head, but your mouth wasn’t getting the memo.
“It’s your fault,” you insisted. You grabbed at his shirt, fisting your fingers into it. “You know this shirt drives me crazy.”
“It’s just a shirt,” Jeonghan said innocently, and his fingers dipped into your burning, wet pussy.
“The collar is all stretched out,” you snapped back. “And it shows your stupid collarbone-”
“Y/n you’re so kinky,” Jeonghan teased, as if he didn’t know. “And that gives you the excuse huh? To be grinding with that stranger on the dance floor. Knowing it would drive me crazy when you started to strip off your jacket-”
“Maybe I was just doing that for myself,” you bit back. “Maybe I’m tired of fucking around with you all the time as if you are even my best option.”
Wrong choice of words. Jeonghan’s hands pulled out of your pants, and his hand slapped across your face in an instance. He immediately clasped your chin in his grip, the wetness you had soaked his fingers with now on your cheek.
“I am your best option,” he practically growled. “You will never fuck anyone who makes you feel as good as I make you feel. That’s why you grinded with that fucking man. That’s why you always come crawling back. That’s why your pussy is always soaked when I decide to fuck you. Because even though we are broken up you are still mine.”
He knew every single button to push. Knew exactly how to get your blood pumping through your body.
“Can’t,” he reiterated roughly. “Or won’t.”
“Will,” you gasped out. “Fuck, I’m sorry. I’ll be good. Fuck me, okay?”
Jeonghan pressed his fingers into your mouth with a scoff.
“Fucking ridiculous the way an insult makes your little cunt cry for attention. You sucked his fingers until he ripped them from your mouth.
“Clothes off,” he pressed. You immediately began to tear your clothes off, and you pouted as you realized that Jeonghan wasn’t taking off his.
“Jeonghan, ple-”
“What? Take off my clothes too?” He said, his voice full of fake sympathy. “My collarbone started this didn’t it? Then my collarbone will continue to do it for you.”
He walked up to you, and forcibly pressed you to your knees. You groaned as your knees hit the floor, knowing for sure you would have bruises the next day.
He tapped your head impatiently with his index finger.
“Well? Get it out.”
You reached forward, your fingers fumbling with the button of his pants. He grabbed your hand in a tight grip.
“Just the zipper.”
You swallowed hard and nodded.
“Okay.”
Your tongue was dry as you pulled down his zipper, reach into his pants to pull his cock out. Once it was out, Jeonghan had wrapped a hand around it. He gave it a few small pumps and then with a sound of aggravation tapped it to your lips.
“Well?” He said again, and you could tell that your little show had made him a lot more impatient than he usually was. You leaned forward to catch his cock with your mouth, but he pulled himself away from you and hit you with the base of it.
You couldn’t help the moan of frustration that left your mouth, but you tried to catch it in your mouth again regardless. Once again, he pulled himself away from you and hit you again with his cock. When you whined this time, he had the audacity to huff out in annoyance.
“What the fuck is taking you so long?”
This time when you darted forward, you were able to slip his tip into your mouth.
“Hold-”
You did as you were told, your eyes flitting up to Jeonghan. He smiled sickly at you.
“So good when you finally have what you want in your reach.”
Your eyes flitted closed and suddenly his cock was out of your mouth, and you were hit with it again, this time getting spit on your forehead.
“Eyes on me,” he snapped, and your eyes were back on him. Your mouth dropped open before he could tell you to, and a small hum of appreciation ran through him as he laid the base of his cock on your tongue. You felt the weight of him, able to see the length of him in your peripheral.
Such a stupid long and fat cock. You really did go crazy for it. It genuinely made you fucking stupid when it was inside of you. Jeonghan made you fucking stupid when he was fucking you.
“Good…” Jeonghan mumbled, mostly to himself. His hand came to your hair, at first seeming to caress you with his fingers, before they tightened in the strands of your hair and you were forced down all the way to the base of his cock.
You coughed out in surprise at the sudden presence of his cock so deep in your throat that you couldn’t really focus on anything else. Jeonghan pulled you off for just a second so that you could catch your breath, and once he saw that you had relaxed again, once he knew you were prepared, he was forcing you all the way back to his base again.
This time you focused on breathing in through your nose, you didn’t choke, but a gruesome gurgling sound filled the dirty bathroom as Jeonghan pulled back again, his cock already slick with your saliva.
He didn’t say anything as he brutally ravaged your throat. Using it like it had been weeks since he had gotten the chance to get his dick wet. In reality, it had been only a few days. But his moans made it seem different.
You knew from experience that if Jeonghan was fucking your throat like this, then he wasn’t going to waste time prepping you for his cock when he was ready to fuck you. You began to pump your fingers in and out of yourself in pace with his thrusts, your own moans being gurgled and ripped out of your throat as he used you like a toy.
One of your hands rose to his jeans as you felt his cock pulsing in your throat. You balled your fingers in the material in anticipation for his cum in your throat- and just as anticipated he was coming inside of you practically instantly.
He pulled his cock out of your mouth, and you coughed some of his cum up as you struggled to catch your breath. Jeonghan watched you, chest heaving, pumping himself back to hardness. You made sure that all the cum you coughed up ended in your hand, and once you had completely caught your breath you made sure Jeonghan saw you lick the cum back up off of your hand.
He rolled his eyes, but tugged at your hair regardless, pulling you right back to your feet. As soon as you were up his lips were on yours, his hand shifting to the back of your neck so that he could kiss you without you moving much under him.
You whined against his lips, body melting under his touch, letting him overpower you in every single way. One of his hands snuck around your body, his hand squeezing your tits distractedly. That drew his attention away from the kiss, and his lips left yours allowing you the chance to catch your breath with a large gasp.
The two of you started to stagger back until your back hit the wall. Jeonghan’s head tilted down, his lips finding your neck. You wanted to tell him not to leave any marks, but his free hand squeezed your ass and your eyes fluttered shut, lost in the feeling.
This was why you loved fucking him so much. The degradation always left your blood pumping, it caused your core to burn in a way that was almost painful, and left your thighs wet from your dripping arousal. But the way that he praised your body proved to you that his words, his belittlement of you was just another way to get you there.
His teeth nipped at your neck, and an airy moan left your lips. You briefly recalled being worried your friends would hear you, but then his lips were trailing across your neck, and over your breasts and you really didn’t care.
You were sure that Jeonghan could hear your heart pounding in your chest as he cupped your breasts with one hand and sucked on your nipples, but if he did, he didn’t say anything about it.
You were dripping down your thighs by the time that Jeonghan pulled off your chest, your tits dripping with saliva. He gave your ass a hard slap, making you cry out in surprise.
“Why don’t you present to me?” Jeonghan slurred, wiping saliva off of the corner of his lip. Your face burned red, but you struggled to get into place anyways. You placed your hands on the wall, spreading your legs a bit as you arched your back, shoving your ass out for him.
Jeonghan slapped your ass, hard making your whole body jerk. He smoothed over your ass.
“If I had all day, I would spank you so hard you couldn’t sit straight tomorrow,” Jeonghan mumbled. The tip of his cock prodded at your entrance. “But instead, I think I’ll fuck you so hard you can’t walk straight.”
“Condom,” you spat out in response, as if either of you gave two shits about it.
“You’d be so lucky, to get knocked up by me,” Jeonghan said back and to emphasize it he pulled you back by your hair and spit on your face. Your eyes instinctively squeezed shut as it hit your cheek. “Finally have me locked down for life.”
But he hesitated, his fingers loosening their grip on your hair, the tip of his cock just barely touching your pussy. You let your forehead fall forward and hit the wall.
“No condom,” you agreed, and his cock was in you in an instant. A desperate cry left your lips as he thrust his entire length into your pussy. The angle made it feel like he was literally splitting you open and feeling him pushing so deep inside of you had your thighs shaking.
Jeonghan grabbed you by your waist, and his other hand came around your throat. He squeezed at it, causing your gasps to come ragged.
“I thought you said that you didn’t want anyone to hear,” Jeonghan grunted. You whined, and it earned you another squeeze. “Y/n, fucking shut up.”
His hand raised blindly to your face, and he slapped his hand over your mouth. Your eyes shut in pleasure, as you moaned shamelessly into the palm of his hand. Your hands kept sliding against the surface of the wall, because Jeonghan was fucking you so hard you could barely keep yourself upright.
Still, his voice didn’t echo how hard he was fucking you.
“God, whores are all the same,” he grunted out. “Put your mouth to good use.”
His fingers pushed into your mouth, and you briefly gagged on them, spit dribbling all over his fingers and down your chin.
“All you did is fucking tease me, with your perfect body. Your perfect lips, your perfect pussy…” A groan left Jeonghan’s mouth, and he removed his fingers from your mouth so that he could more securely grab you by your waist. It made his thrusts even sharper, it made his cock go even deeper.
You were moaning shamelessly, unable to muffle yourself if you wanted to, and it was just making Jeonghan fuck you harder.
“Fuck y/n, I miss your body so bad,” he groaned out. “I need to be buried in your pussy everyday all the fucking time. You were made for me. You were made for my cock.”
You started babbling your agreement, but he wasn’t even listening to your words.
“Going to cum deep inside of you,” Jeonghan mumbled. “I’m going to cum so deep inside of you that you’re going to feel my cum sloshing around your womb for weeks.”
Any qualms that you had from earlier were completely forgotten in your sex-drunk brain. You nodded, immediately begging Jeonghan for him to do exactly that and it just spurred him on.
His hips started to stutter, his cock pulsing inside of you and true to his words he buried himself deep in your pussy, his hot cum shooting so deep inside you that you thought you were going to explode.
Your body went week in his arms as your own orgasm ripped through your body, milking his cock of the rest of his cum. And as soon as your body had stopped shaking as much Jeonghan gave you a few sharp thrusts, to make sure that his cum really was deep inside of you.
Once he was sure, he pulled himself out of you and you crumbled to your knees, chest heaving. Your face hit the floor, your ass pointed straight up in the air. Jeonghan took advantage of this angle to give your pussy a good slap.
“Better keep that cum inside of you sweetheart,” he said, dragging out the pet name. He spit, and you felt it hit your pussy. You hissed out in surprise, and refused to move from your spot on the floor. You heard Jeonghan zipping up his own pants and then he was wandering about the bathroom.
You figured he would just leave, but after a few moments he had you by your arm and was pulling you up to your shaking feet. He dragged you over to the sink, and began to dab your face clean with cool water and a paper towel. A hand combed through your hair while the other focused on getting you completely clean.
Once he was satisfied, he pushed your clothes into your hands.
“Get dressed y/n,” he said with a roll of his eyes. You took your clothes, but noticed something cold and metal in your hands as well. You moved to observe the small key that Jeonghan had given you.
“An uber is coming to take you to my place.” His eyes were on himself in the mirror. He pretended to be checking his hair. “I’ll be there soon after you. Take a shower. I’ll get us takeout okay?”
You nodded wordlessly, but he hovered.
“Thank you,” you whispered. He waved his hand off as if to disregard you entirely, and then he was gone.
You glanced at yourself in the mirror, thinking maybe it would have been better if Jeonghan would just leave it at that. The rough fucking, the meaningless sex.
Because the aftercare… You shook your head, trying to dismiss the thoughts from your hair.
This truly was a dangerous game that you two were playing, and that echoed through your head until you and Jeonghan settled into his bed for the night, his arms wrapped around your torso, his face in your neck.
You had never slept in a better bed.
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Text
Lady of the Ashes: Chapter 6
House of the Dragon Season 1
Aemond x TargaryenOC
Chapter Word Count: 4893
She was his everything… For her…he would do anything.
From the moment of her birth, Aemond Targaryen swore himself to the protection of his niece Aelinor Velaryon. As the two grew up inseparable, they find themselves entangled in the Dance of Dragons, battling to stay together even as their families try to pull them apart.
A/N: Thanks for reading! Cross posted on A03
Let me know what you think!
Masterlist A03
Chapter 1 Chapter 2 P.1 P.2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6
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It was nearly noon when Aelinor awoke, the sun peeking through her curtains and disturbing her peace. She had lain awake for several hours after her night with Aemond, unable to think of anything else but him. How he had held her hand, how close they had been to kissing. It seemed almost childish to be thrown out of sorts by something as simple as a kiss, and yet she was unable to push it from her mind. Alas, when she had finally fallen asleep, it had been a deep one.
Someone was pounding on her door. “Aelinor! Mother wants you.”
It was Jace, and he took her answering groan as permission to enter the chamber. “Why are you still asleep?”
“I’m not asleep, am I?” She rolled over, wincing as she stretched her muscles. “What does Mother want?”
Jace poked her foot through the covers. “We need to begin getting ready for the festivities.”
“We?”
“Well, you do. You have to do your hair and…other things.” He looked genuinely baffled, like he couldn’t fathom what kinds of preparations a woman might have to do to get ready for a royal banquet and ball.
Aelinor heaved herself out of bed with a sigh, accepting the heavy dressing gown Jace handed her to cover her nightgown. 
“Is she up yet?” Luc poked his head through the door. “Oh, good morning Aelinor. Or should I say afternoon?”
She wrinkled her nose at him, knotting the dressing gown at the waist.
“Why are you so tired?” Jace asked. 
Aelinor shrugged. “Not used to the bed, I guess.”
“I, for one, found the bed and chambers quite comfortable.” Jace said, moving out of her way as they moved into the corridor. “Far less drafty than Dragonstone.”
She searched for an excuse in her sleep-addled brain, unable to come up with anything believable.
“We stayed up late playing cards,” Luc said. “Aelinor wouldn’t let us go to bed until she beat me.”
She thought her younger brother a grateful look, appreciating that he was covering for her. 
“And did she?” Jace asked, believing the excuse.
“No, she gave up.” Luc laughed.
Aelinor yawned loudly. “You’re both impossible.”
They stepped into the main room of their family’s chambers, and were immediately met by a throng of people. Maids bustled to and fro, unpacking garments from bags, some already set up with needles and thread to make necessary alterations, and others opening boxes of jewels. Aelinor held her dressing gown a little tighter to her body. 
“Aelinor!” Her mother was seated at the small breakfast table, watching two of the maids entertain the small children. “Are you just waking up now?”
“Yes, Mother. I feel rather like the walking dead this morning.”
“Why? Are you ill?” Rhaenyra reached out to touch her daughter’s forehead. “You don’t feel warm.”
She shook her head. “I just stayed up too late.”
“Losing at cards.” Jace teased. 
Rhaenyra smiled, squeezing Aelinor’s hand. “As long as you’re well. Did you have a good evening, card games aside?”
Aelinor hated lying to her mother. Part of her just wanted to tell her the truth, admit where she had been and who she was with. Her mother had always humored her more rebellious side, and likely wouldn’t be as furious as she was imagining. Not to mention, things would be infinitely worse if her mother found out from whoever had been spying on them in the library.
But still Aelinor was not able to admit everything. “I had a good evening. It’s nice to be back.”
“It is.” Rhaenyra agreed. “Now, we must begin getting you ready. Starting with that hair.” She teasingly pulled on a string of Aelinor’s tangled mane. She had gone to sleep without braiding it, and it was looking quite unkempt.
A maid was waved over, and Aelinor dropped into the seat opposite her mother, reaching for a half-empty plate of biscuits. She chewed slowly as the maid ran a brush through her hair, combatting the tangles one by one.
“The fashion seems to be to wear one’s hair up now,” She said absently. “Perhaps with some braiding throughout?”
Rhaenyra gave her a small smile. “I think it’s best that you wear your hair down, darling.”
“Why?” Aelinor couldn’t see how dancing all evening, getting all sweaty and letting the scent of smoke and cooked meats seep into her hair, could possibly be a good thing.
But then she saw her mother’s eyes dart toward the couch, where Jace was polishing a spot off one of his boots, and she understood. In this fight for her brother’s legitimacy, she was her mother’s best weapon, and her hair was the most obvious way to wield it.
“Unbraided, then.” She acquiesced.
Rhaenyra nodded. “Oh, but we have a circlet for you, darling. You will look beautiful.”
Aelinor offered her mother a sincere smile. It had been years since they had had the opportunity to prepare for an event of this size, and it reminded her of far simpler times. 
“I assume you have a dress for me, as well. Can I see it?” She winced as the maid yanked on a stubborn knot behind her ear.
Rhaenyra grinned. “Even better, I have three. We shall have to try them on to see which suits best.”
“Good gods,” Lucerys threw his head back in complaint.
“And you boys shall remain here,” Rhaenyra said quickly. “To help your sister choose.”
Jace glared at his brother. “Is Driftmark worth this, Brother?”
*********************************************************
Aemond was called to his mother’s chambers only an hour before the ball. He had been awake with the dawn, throwing himself into training bouts to while away the time and distract his mind. The night with Aelinor had been more than he had ever dreamed of, and waking up just to remember that she was betrothed to Jacaerys of all people, and that he would have to attend this cursed ball in the evening was enough to drive him into a fury.
None of the visiting nobles were willing to spend the morning on the training grounds, and so he grabbed several young squires and put them through their paces while he worked through his rage. Afterwards, he had returned to his chambers to bathe and dress. The small box inside his writing desk just made him think of Aelinor, and so he had spent more time pacing the halls until Ser Criston came to summon him.
When he arrived at his mother’s chambers, he found it deathly quiet. His brother was reclined on the sofa, head thrown back and eyes closed. Helaena sat quietly at his side, her hands clasped tightly in front of her. His mother stood in front of the window, her fingers playing with the Star of the Seven that hung at her throat, worry lines creasing her face. 
“Aemond,” she barely glanced his way when he walked in. “Where have you been?”
“Training,” He answered. 
“Don’t you look nice,” Aegon slowly rolled his head to the side, eyes lazily scanning him from head to toe. “Did you oil your hair?”
Aemond resisted the urge to smooth his hair. He had, in fact, run some oil through it before pulling it back in his usual style. It was more effort than he would usually put it for a court function, but he had found himself overly concerned with preparing for this event. Even his clothing — a relatively simple green and black tunic and matching trousers — had been freshly washed and pressed. 
“Anyone in particular you might be doing that for?” Aegon prodded.
Aemond stiffened. “I’m not sure what you mean.”
His mother dropped her hands, turning to stare at him. “Aemond, you cannot be serious. We spoke of Aelinor. She is not your friend.”
No, she was far more than a friend to Aemond, though he couldn’t blame his mother for trying to lessen it. He didn’t reply, just placed both hands behind his back and waited expectantly.
Alicent walked toward him, placing a hand on his shoulder. “Aemond, she is betrothed. Rhaenyra has betrothed her to Jacaerys. Everyone knows it, and it has only to be formally announced. You must distance yourself before you are made a fool of.”
He already was a fool. There was no way he could distance himself, not now. And though each reminder that she was promised to Jace felt like a stab in the gut, he kept his face passive. “And what if she does not wish to marry Jacaerys?”
Alicent shook her head in exasperation. “And who would she marry, Aemond? You? Her mother would never tie her family to ours, and we must not tie ourselves to her’s.”
“Aren’t they our family?” Helaena spoke up suddenly, surprising all of them. 
Alicent barely spared a glance to her daughter. “The only family we must concern ourselves with are those who live righteously, who honor the gods and the Seven Kingdoms with their actions. Us.”
Aemond bit his tongue. He did not disagree with his mother’s sentiment toward the Princess Rhaenyra, and her sons. They were bastards, and Rhaenyra, though she had been kind to him when he was young, had stood by Lucerys even when he cut out Aemond’s eye. Had not punished the boys when Aelinor was permanently maimed by a fire. He had no love for any of them.
He just considered Aelinor to be something different.
Aegon groaned loudly. “Can we just go? I don’t give a shit which bastards are marrying which whores, and—”
“What did you say?” Aemond demanded, crossing the room in a second. Aegon flinched back, pinned between the couch and his wife. Aemond itched to strike him, his hand curling into a fist.
“Aegon, that talk is beneath you.” Alicent said, though she did not correct it. “And Aemond, leave your brother be. The fool is drunk.”
Aemond sneered in disgust, able to smell the reek of ale off of his brother. His mother was right, Aegon was a fool.”
“The banquet will begin shortly,” Alicent said. “We must be there to receive the guests. And we are all expected to attend, and remain there, for the duration of the evening.”
From her tone, it was clear that there was nothing she wanted to do less than spend a night in revelry and celebration over the return of Princess Rhaenyra.
With exaggerated groans, Aegon peeled himself off the couch, stumbling out the door without waiting for his wife, who trailed meekly after him. Alicent caught Aemond’s arm before he could follow.
“I mean it, Aemond.” Alicent said quietly. “Remember who you are, and who she is.”
“I will, Mother.” He hesitated as he studied her face. Her eyes were ringed with dark circles, and her complexion appeared more sallow than usual. “You don’t look well, Mother. Is there something wrong?”
She sighed, giving his shoulder a quick pat. “I did not sleep well. Your father…he was restless all night.”
How many years had it been, that Aemond watched his mother slowly waste away as she cared for his father, as she tried to hold the Kingdoms together? For the King to have an ill night was the last thing she needed, especially with their visitors and all the activity to come in the next few days.
He gave a curt nod. “Then I shall be on my best behavior. And I shall endeavor to keep Aegon contained as well.”
************************************************************
The banquet was in full swing by the time Aelinor made her way to the hall. The dress they had chosen had required a few alterations to fit, and so she had told her family to go on ahead. Now she was regretting that choice, as it meant she would be entering the room by herself, instead of as part of her mother’s house.
Perhaps she could sneak in. It was always possible that, if the festivities had begun in earnest, she might sneak through the doors and find her way to her mother’s side without anyone noticing her. But alas, when she rounded the corner, the doors to the hall were shut firmly, two guards stationed on either side.
Muttering a curse under her breath, she slowed to a walk, barely managing to compose herself before the doors were being heaved open and a loud voice was proclaiming “The Princess Aelinor Velaryon!”
Three hundred faces stopped to stare at her, and she found it a little hard to breathe. Stepping through the door, she tried to scan the crowd for a familiar face. There, seated at the front of the hall next to an empty seat, was Queen Alicent, with Lord Otto Hightower at her side. Neither of their expressions were particularly welcoming. She could not see her mother, not among the dozens of people paused on the floor, clearly having been in the middle of a dance, nor could she see her or any of her brothers at the long tables that framed the room. She was on her own.
With a deep breath, she clasped her skirt in both hands, the black silk of her skirt crumbling beneath her fingers as she dipped into a small curtsy. Enough to show respect for the Queen, but not so much as would be owed to the King. She rose without wobbling, and then descended the steps as quickly as she could manage. There seemed to be an awkward pause, before she heard the sharp note of a fiddle and the musicians resumed.
Keeping to the edge, she tried to pick her way past the dancers as she searched for her family. Everywhere she turned a noble she did not recognize was offering a bow or a curtsy, usually with a quietly murmured “Princess”. She returned their greetings, but did not linger. Only hours ago she had been excited for the ball, for her chance to attend for the first time. How many times as a child had she hidden up in the rafters with Aemond, dreaming of joining the dancers down below? She glanced up, wondering if there were any young faces doing the same as she had once. But not it seemed only to be a crush of unfamiliar figures, and she longed for a spot of quiet. 
“Princess Aelinor,” Someone stepped into her path. He was a small, spindly man with a cane at his side, and an unsettling smirk on his face. “You have much changed.”
His fingers twitched out, nearly catching the crimson chiffon of her sleeve. She took a step back, but was pressed against another stranger, this one ensconced in a conversation and unaware of how he was entrapping the princess.
“Forgive me, Sir.” Aelinor cleared her throat. “But have we met?”
“When you were very small, Princess.” He tilted his head. “And as I said, you have grown much.”
She did not like this man. “Might I have your name, Sir. I don’t—”
“Lina!” She could have wept to hear Aemond’s voice at her side. He emerged from the center of the dance floor, pushing through a dancing pair and coming to stand at her side. “I have been looking for you.”
“I’ve only just arrived. I was speaking to…” She turned around, only to find that the spidery man had vanished back into the crowd. “How odd.”
“Was someone bothering you?”
“No, it was only strange.” She tried to shake the interaction from her mind. “My, don’t you look every bit the handsome prince.”
Aemond shrugged, uncomfortable with the compliment. But it was the truth. Aelinor could not recall ever seeing him look so fine. His tunic was embroidered with gold thread, the rich green so dark that it was nearly black. His silver hair was smoothed back, falling over his wide shoulders.
“Are you enjoying yourself?” He asked.
Aelinor glanced around, well aware that every person around them was only pretending not to eavesdrop. “I just arrived. I have not even—”
“Little Aelinor!” A hand landed on the small of her back. “I knew I would find you here.”
“Uncle.” She greeted Aegon with a polite curtsy, resisting the urge to shuffle away from his touch. “I trust you are well?”
His eyes drooped slightly as he appraised her. “All the better for seeing you.”
“Brother, I—” Aemond tried to cut in.
“Darling Niece,” Aegon continued. “Care to dance?”
There was no polite way to refuse an offer from a prince, especially not when it had been made so publicly.
“Of course, Uncle.” She set her good hand in his, shooting Aemond a look of apology. “Perhaps I shall see you later?”
“Oh, I’m certain he will make sure of it.” Aegon tugged her away, leading her right to the center of the floor.
Aelinor could feel the eyes following her as Aegon stopped them in the center of the floor, assuming the position for a quick four step, a dance she knew quite well. When she glanced to the side, she saw the Queen standing from her seat, disappearing into the crowd just as the musicians struck up a new song.
This particular dance was quite easy, involving two partners who moved around each other in a circle, occasionally clasping hands or jumping. It was ideal for chatting with a suitor, but unfortunately, Aelinor had no interest in chatting with Aemond, not when she could smell drink on his breath.
Aegon, for his part, did not seem overly interested in conversing. He moved through the steps lazily, clearly too drunk to execute them gracefully, but also too familiar to make a complete mockery of himself. Twenty couples moved around them, all of them completely silent, waiting to catch wind of what Prince Aegon and her might be discussing.
“How is Helaena?” Aelinor began, remembering her mother’s request to behave as if nothing was wrong. “I have not yet had the chance to speak with her.”
Aegon shrugged. “I’ve not seen her tonight.”
“No?” Aelinor frowned, before plastering a smile back on her face. “Well, then. Your children, how are they?”
“I have three of them.” Aegon said, clearly not overwhelmed with fatherly affection.
Aelinor tried to drum up some sympathy for her uncle. As long as she had known him, he had never thrived in the spotlight, nor had he been enthusiastic about wedding Helaena. But as someone who had never been drawn to the drink, Aelinor could not quite bring herself to forgive his inebriation.
“My brother,” Aegon drawled. “Seems unable to keep his eye off of you.”
Aelinor ignored the jibe. “I’m sure he’s just observing the dancing.”
“Or he’s fueling his obsession with you,” Aegon leaned forward conspiratorially. “Tell me, Niece. What do you see in my brother?”
His hands had curled almost painfully into her waist. The music ended and Aelinor snapped back, putting space between them. 
“For one thing,” She hissed. “He’s not a drunken lech.”
Bobbing a curtsy, she left him on the floor. Unfortunately, she did not see Aemond in the crowd. Intending to resume the search for her mother, she moved toward the front of the room, only to nearly walk directly into the Queen.
“Your Majesty,” She curtsied, feeling like she had spent most of the evening bobbing up and down. “Forgive me, I did not see you there.”
Alicent held both hands in front of her, her red hair shining against the emerald of her gown. “Aelinor. You look beautiful.”
“Thank you, Your Majesty.” Aelinor nodded gratefully. She would not pretend that she had ever been friendly with Alicent, but the Queen had always been kind to her as a child.
“Did you enjoy your dance?” Alicent asked.
“I did,” Aelinor said too quickly. “It was…nice to see Aegon again.”
“Hm,” Alicent looked like she did not believe her. “Well, I’m glad. I think you’ll find it difficult to source another partner.”
“Your…your Majesty?”
Alicent leaned forward. “You look beautiful, Aelinor. But no one wishes to dance with a cripple.”
Aelinor recoiled, her mouth falling open as the Queen walked away. That was…that had been cruel. Overcome with shame, Aelinor adjusted her long sleeve so that it fell over her injured hand. She knew her hand unsettled people, but it did not make her a cripple. And she would never have expected something so malicious to come out of the Queen’s mouth.
“Aelinor! Are you alright?”
The crowd this evening just seemed to keep throwing conversations her way. Thankfully, this time it was Aemond, who placed one hand on her elbow. 
“Aemond,” She said quietly.
“Was that my mother?” He asked. “Are you alright, you look pale.”
Aelinor shook her head. “I’m quite alright.”
“Would you care to dance with me?” He asked, looking a bit nervous. “If you…if you would like to.”
Aelinor glanced up at him. “I would love to, Aemond, But I should really find my family. I promised Jace a dance and I—”
Aemond frowned, and she remembered how he did not like to be reminded of her near-betrothal to Jace. 
Two courtiers moved past, whispering as they did. Aelinor hid her hand further in her sleeve, the Queen’s jibe stinging sharply through her veins. “I can find them later. Let us dance.”
Aemond smiled, and she thought she heard someone nearby gasp as he took her hand and led her back to the floor. They took up a spot on the edge, and Aemond grasped her waist with one hand as the musicians began. This was a slower set, allowing them to whirl between other couples in time with the music. Aelinor was a bit lost in her thoughts, her mind swirling with the music and her conversation with the Queen.
“You’re hiding your hand,” Aemond whispered. “Why?”
“What?” Aelinor looked up. He was so much taller than her, so much that she had to tilt her head back to see his face.”Oh, I just…it looks better this way.”
“I wouldn’t expect you to care very much how it looks.” Aemond said. “After all, you are—”
The music stopped suddenly, and Aelinor spun a few more steps before they stopped. The guests were all turning to the dias, where Princess Rhaenyra, Princess Rhaenys, and their children stood in a neat line. 
Aelinor tilted her head. “What are they doing?”
Queen Alicent was standing at the foot of the dias, her eyes wide as she stared up at the princess. It took only a few moments for the hall to fall completely silent, all eyes on Rhaenyra.
“We are grateful to everyone for being here today,” Rhaenyra said. “It has been wonderful to see so many familiar faces.”
The crowd murmured in approval. 
“I think she’s just thanking the court,” Aelinor whispered, conscious of how Aemond’s hand still lingered at her back.
“And,” Rhaenyra continued. “I would like to take this opportunity to impart on the court an announcement that is sure to bring great happiness to us all.”
Jace stepped up to his mother’s side, and Aelinor felt her blood run cold. This was it. They were about to announce it to everyone, and then her fate would be sealed. She felt a few eyes turning her way, the rumor mill no doubt assuring that most courtiers could predict what this announcement may be.
“It gives me great job to announce the betrothal of my son Prince Jacaerys—”
Oh gods, here it was.
“And my son Prince Lucerys to the Princesses Baela and Rhaena. This joining of two great Valyrian houses will no doubt be a triumph for the realm.”
A thousand emotions flooded Aelinor, the foremost of them being shock. Jacaerys was betrothed to Baela? What did this mean? Her mother had never wavered in her intention to betrothe her two eldest children, and yet…she had just changed her mind before the entire court. 
Jace held out a hand to Baela, both of them beaming as they descended to the floor for a dance.
Queen Alicent climbed the steps quickly, speaking in hushed tones to Rhaenyra as the room slowly resumed the party. Things made a bit more sense to Aelinor, then. The trial addressing Luc’s succession would take place the following day, and Rhaenyra had just assured that the Velaryons would support his claim. It would now be Vaemond standing against his own family, almost certainly guaranteeing them success.
But people were whispering, casting looks her way as they moved through the room. The dancing began anew, and yet she just stood there, Aemond by her side, trying to process what was happening.
“Cast aside—”
“The bastards are—”
“...betrothed to a cripple…”
It was all too much, and Aelinor turned quickly and rushed from the room. She shoved through the crowd, around one of the tables and out through one of the servant doors. She was barely aware of someone following until she felt Aemond’s hand on her arm.
“Lina, are you—”
A servant moved past, carrying a tray of sweetmeats, and he gave the Princess a concerned look.
Aemond turned to him and roared. “OUT! Now!”
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The evening had not taken the turn that Aemond had expected. He had expected to endure a night of endless political preening, perhaps stealing a dance with Aelinor or his sister, and now he was huddled in a servants’ corridor, while Aelinor hid in the corner.
“I’m sorry,” she held a hand to her mouth. “I just….everyone was talking and I…I just couldn’t…”
“Take all the time you need,” Aemond assured her. “No one will bother you.”
In truth, he was seething inside. For a split second, he had been overjoyed. To know that Aelinor would not be marrying Jacaerys…if he were devout it would have been something he prayed for. But then he had watched the bastard lead his new betrothed into a dance, and he had seen how Aelinor’s face had fallen.
That bastard had cast her aside, her entire family had opened her up to scorn. As if the bastard even deserved Aelinor at all. No, he deserved nothing, but Aelinor certainly did not deserve to be publicly rejected in front of the court like that. 
Aelinor was shaking her head. “Gods, she could have told me.”
“You did not deserve that,” Aemond hissed. “For him to gloat and—”
She held up a hand. “He was not gloating. He and Baela are well suited, and I am happy for them.”
She was too kind. Too generous. She would forgive them, she always would, just as she had forgiven them when they maimed her as a child. This was what happened when he wasn’t by her side, she was coerced into accepting this treatment from them, when she deserved far better.
“Perhaps I’ll get to go back to Dragonstone in peace,” She gave a small smile. 
“You cannot allow—”
“Did you want me to marry Jace? Is that it?” She demanded. “Because after last night, I rather thought that you…that we…”
“That we were what?” Aemond stepped forward until her back was against the wall.
Aelinor sighed. “I don’t know, Aemond. Tonight has been overwhelming, and there are so many people here who I do not know. I just need to go back to Dragonstone, to people who understand me, and it will—”
Aemond reached up and ripped off his eye patch. “I understand you!”
Her lips parted as she stared up at him, at the blue gem that flickered in the torch light. Aemond’s chest was heaving with some kind of craze, and he knew he should step back. He had to, before he did something that both of them regretted. But nothing in him was strong enough to move away from her.
Slowly she lifted her injured hand, silk sleeves falling away as she let her fingertips trace the edges of his scar, inching closer to his eye.
“That’s my sapphire,” She breathed. “You…you actually did it.”
“Of course I did,” He lifted his hand to grasp hers. “How could you think that I don’t understand you?”
“I…that is not what I meant.” She whispered.
“I know,” He nodded. “And…I don’t mean to force your hand. You deserve better than your brother, and I won’t pretend that I am a better option. I only wanted you to see that I…that I have always…”
“Aemond…” She leaned closer.
Footsteps sounded in the hallway, and Aemond wrenched himself away just as a servant came through carrying pitchers of wine. They waited until the servant had passed into the ballroom before speaking again.
“Thank you, Aemond.” Aelinor said, kneeling to the ground to pick up his eye patch. “Thank you for always being there.”
He couldn’t find the strength to speak as he took the eyepatch from her. Sighing, Aelinor stepped past, “And Aemond?”
“Yes?”
She gave him a small smile. “I do not think you should have to hide, either.”
Aemond watched her disappear through the door before retying his eye patch, making sure to cover his eye entirely. When he stepped back into the room, he saw Aelinor making her way toward her mother, but his eye sought out another.
On the dance floor, Jacaerys spun Baela in what must be their second or third dance. Aemond felt his blood boil. Aelinor might be willing to forgive, but he was not so generous.
Before the night was out, the bastard would answer to him.
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lexisecretaccx · 14 hours
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High School Sweethearts pt.12 - Chris Sturniolo
Other parts are on my Masterlist!
(Fem reader x Chris Sturniolo, suggestive, slight mentions of family death, can’t spoil anything..)
A/n: sigh…
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As we leave school I turn to Chris and kiss him gently on the lips, he smiles before looking up at Oliver who was talking to Matt and Nick, causing his smile to faulter, “promise you will be ok?” Chris ducks his head into the crook of my neck and whispers against my skin before kissing gently.
“Yes Chris, I promise.” I pull him away and kiss his cheek before we part ways and I walk towards Oliver, Matt and Nick saying bye to me as they go to walk with Chris.
Oliver smiles at me and we start to walk, I look back to Chris and the others and see Matt looking back, he quickly turns his head nervously. “We still have the old house, my dad couldn’t bring himself to sell it, I think because he knew he was gonna.. you know.” Oliver swallows hardly, I pat his arm comfortingly. “Yeah.” I breathe out.
“So you still have your old room? With the car wallpaper?” I chuckle, he shook his head also laughing, “I tore that shit down, my walls are just white and grey now.” He looks down at me, “I think you should’ve kept it.” I smirk before looking down at my feet.
The only sound is our feet dragging against the concrete sidewalk, we turn down Oliver’s old street. “My mom is working until 5 and Lacey has dance practice until half 5 so they’ll be back after that. So it’s just us for now.” He spoke as we walk up the path to his house.
I nod softly as he opens the door, nostalgia hits me as I take in the living room, different furniture but same layout. My face lights up, “it’s just like I remember.” I say excitedly, Oliver laughs at my reactions, “yep.” He replies.
“Wanna come see the new improved, no longer car filled room?” He grins, I look to him, “yeah, it’s not gonna be as cool anymore though.” I laugh and we walk upstairs. He pushes his door open and I’m greeted by the plain white walls and one grey feature wall, his black and white furniture and LEDs across his ceiling.
“This is nice… would’ve been better with the cars on the wall though.” I shrug, causing him to smirk. He sits down on his bed and pats next to him for me to sit down. “Wanna play a game?” He says, causing me to tilt my head in confusion, “what-” he cuts me off, “on my PlayStation, of course.” He adds on motioning to his TV and PS5 sitting next to it.
“Oh yeah of course.” I nod. He hands me a controller and turns on the PS5, “what about this? A zombie fighting game.” He offers and looks to me, excitement in his eyes, just like when we were kids. “Yeah okay, I’m gonna shit myself.” I joke.
We start the game, he’s great at it, my eyes focus on his hands on the controller, pushing buttons, flicking triggers.. “you’re gonna die.” He spoke, causing me to look at the TV, “shit.” I fight back the zombies and Oliver adds on “what distracted you?” I hum in confusion, “when you almost died just then, you seemed distracted, why?” He asks.
I shrug, “I’m just a bit tired.” I lie, my eyes darting down to his hands once more before continuing to the game. “Apparently you beat up a boy..” he spoke, a smirk evident on his face. I scoff, “he deserved it.” Is all I reply with as he chuckles.
Some time passes and I die on the game, “fuck.” I complain as I set the controller down next to me and lie back in defeat. “You’re bad at this game huh?” He teases, I lightly hit his arm. “Fuck off, it didn’t help that you..” my phone buzzes, Chris❤️ flashes up on my screen. “Chris is calling me, let me answer him.” Oliver nodded and I stepped out into the hallway.
“You okay?” I say, “uh yeah.. what you up to?” He replies nervously. “Playing a zombie game on his PlayStation, thats all.” I chuckle, “wait aren’t you supposed to be eating dinner there?” Chris spoke in confusion, “oh yeah but his mom and sister aren’t here for another half hour.” I say. “So you’re alone in his house with him?” Chris said, jealousy evident in his voice, “yeah.. do you trust me?” I ask. “I trust you, just be safe.” He replies, “I will.” I smile to myself. And we end the call.
I walk back into his room, “Chris okay?” He asks me and I nod, he turns the game off and faces me as I sit next to him, “he’s just a little bit nervous that I’m here alone with you.” I let Oliver know, “Why? Does he think we’re gonna kiss or something?” Oliver laughs, “I don’t know, I think he’s scared because he’s been cheated on before but he knows I’d never do that.”
“You wouldn’t?” Oliver asks, tilting his head. “Of course not!” I say loudly, “that’s good, great even.” Oliver swallows awkwardly. His eyes dart to my lips and then back up at my eyes and he leans in slightly. I look over at the picture on his wall and stand up quickly, “uh.. what’s this? That’s cool.” I say nervously asI point at the picture.
“Oh that’s.. a photo I took of the beach, my friend edited it for me and uh.. now I got it on my wall.” He shrugs as he stutters awkwardly and stands up too. “Hey I’m sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable.. I wasn’t trying anything I’m sorry.. I’m an idiot.” He sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose.
“It’s ok.. you’re confused I get it.” I reassure him, and we both sit back down. Some time passes before he spoke again, “do you remember when we got married in 1st grade?” He laughs, I remember and join in laughing, “I don’t even think we got divorced.” I chuckle, “You’re cheating on me with Chris? What about the kids.” He jokes as he fake cries.
“I’m filing for divorce.” I smile, “rude.” He replies before smiling back. His phone buzzes and his phone reads Mom. “Oh shit, my mom’s calling me.” He answers the phone infront of me, I can’t hear what’s on the other side of the phone. “You okay mom?” He asks, his face drops. “Is she okay?” He spoke nervously, “shit, should I meet you there?” He swallows, “it’s ok, she’ll understand. I’ll drop her home and head to you.” He looks at me and smiles. “Okay love you.” He hung up.
“What happened?” I ask anxiously, “uh.. change of plans, no dinner but a trip to the hospital!” He spoke with fake enthusiasm, my eyes widen in confusion, “Lacey missed something in dance and fell and broke her arm.” He sighs.
“Oh shit, you’re gonna drop me before going to the hospital right?” I ask, remember what he had said a minute ago. He nods, “my mom’s really sorry we couldn’t do dinner but I’ll drive you home.” He said as we walk down the stairs.
“Since when can you drive?” I smile, pushing his arm slightly, “since a year ago, my dad wanted me to pass my test before he.. died.. and I did.” He smiles softly as we walk outside and he unlocks his car.
We get in the car and start to drive. “Still in the same house?” He asks and I nod, “still in the tiny house yep.” I answer, he pats my knee. “It’s a nice house, is your room still pink as fuck?” He laughs. “Yeah.” I join in laughing.
“I guess I’ll see you next week.” He says as we pull up outside my house but on the opposite side, since there’s a car parked outside, other than my mom’s. I forgot it was Friday. “Oh yeah.. see you then.” I smile as I innocently plant a friendly kiss on his cheek, he smiles and I hop out the car. “Send Lacey my wishes.” I speak as I walk away.
I open the unlocked door, “mom?” I call into the house and she runs up to me, “you’re home early.” She said nervously. “Yep, Lacey broke her arm so he had to drop me home.” I reply trying to push past my mom but she’s blocking me. “So you with a different boy now? Oliver? From when you were a kid?” She asks, trying to change the subject from the fact she’s blocking me from entering my house fully, “still with Chris, just wanted to catch up with Oliver.” I reply.
“His mom was a bitch.” She rolled her eyes, I open my mouth in shock, “His father’s dead mom, her husband. Don’t be so inconsiderate.” I hiss. “Go upstairs.” She spoke, trying to redirect me to the stairs. “No get off.” I half yell.
I hear someone clear their throat from behind my mom, “you got your mom’s anger for sure..” the voice echoes through my head and I feel sick to my stomach.
“What the fuck.” I gulp.
A/n: uh ohhh! Hehehe. I won’t be able to update for the next like 2 days because tmr I’m sleeping at my friends house and the next day I’m going to a funfair. I’ll try to write stuff on Saturday!
Taglist: @blahbel668 @mattsleftnipple03 @rac00ns-are-c00l4 @hysteria-things @sturniologurl4l2008 @jakevwebber @braindead4l @mattybearnard @st7rnioioss @junnniiieee07 @sturniolosmind @accio326 @sturniol0s @alwayssublimedelusion @stingerayyy2 @freshsturns @riasturns @sturniololvrrr @maryx2xx
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spicyicymeloncat · 11 months
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Idk if this is a hot take but why is it always “Kai slaved away and worked his ass off to raise his sister” and never the other way round or them working hard together?
Like, I know he’s older but in the show, does he really… act older? Like if you think about Kai and Nya’s dynamic yknow? Because from my understanding:
When Kai and Nya are introduced we see Kai fail at making a sword and Nya being the one to chide him for it. Kai makes an overconfident statement about wanting to be a better blacksmith than his father. This suggests that one, Kai is rather rash as well as inexperienced (something that lines up with the rest of his character arc in the pots and also generally), with Nya being the more mature figure in contrast
Also just a note but in the shorts: “I can handle it!” “No you can’t, stupid”
Kai frequently being very good at neglecting people or things: leaving Lloyd at an arcade whilst being focused on finding samurai x, not even knowing samurai x was Nya or that she only did it because she felt left out by him, completely abandoning both Nya and Lloyd in s3 (and Ik he was going through it at the time, but in line with the fandom’s characterisation of him)
Kai in season 5: “After I lost my dad, I lost my way. But I was lucky to have my sister watch over me”
Generally, their dynamic isn’t one where Kai really provides for Nya at all. In fact, judging by the fact that Nya can make entire mechs and Kai struggled to make a sword, Nya was probably busting her ass to provide for Kai. And judging by the s5 quote, that’s probably true. I’m not saying Nya raised Kai, it just rubs me the wrong way when she’s treated like a decorative flourish to a narrative that paints Kai as a burnt out child who was forced to grow up too soon especially since that is such a mischaracterisation of him in the first place.
#all I’m saying is that it’s weird we undersell all of the sister’s capabilities just so we can present the brother as tormented and burdened#ignoring the fact that he spent all his days in the gap between the pilots and s1 playing video games#like I’m sorry kai is a pathetic baby girl in the show and I LOVE HIM THE WAY HE IS#okay yeah I snapped a little#I’m just tired of everyone mischaracterising him yknow#like I’m sorry bestie he’s not that capable he’s a loser man and I am ready to love loser men#i just think that it’s an incredibly stereotypical dynamic to have one male character who everyone completely#over exaggerates their struggles to the point of making it seem that everyone else in the story either doesn’t suffer or is an asshole for#not noticing the suffering of this one hot guy#this happens in many fandoms and I think this is what’s happening here#hhhhh#I’m sorry if Kai is ur favourite and this opinion upsets you I don’t mean to be bitch#I’m just really not into this interpretation of him#again this isn’t a dog at his character I just thing people don’t get him a lot of the time#and you know what Nya is also super undersold as a character#like where’s the fucking Nya Lloyd sibling content?#she mentored Lloyd too? she taught him how to ride dragons she stayed with him on the bounty she and Lloyd only had eachother in s9#what about them??#Kai gets too woobified and Nya doesn’t get woobified enough that’s my opinion#alright I’m done sorry#Ninjago#rant#ig this is a#ninjago analysis#i won’t tag characters cuz I don’t want to make anyone upset#and again I’m sorry if I do
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really wish my one friend would quit flirting with me. and trying to goad me into hanging out more. and assigning us fictional characters that are oh-so-coincidently either couples or with romantic tension. and then interrupting our gameplay to ask me repeatedly if I think they’re “like us” (which they rarely are…). and matching my icon on discord without asking (again, usually by insinuating a couple connection). and giving me random things I do not want and did not ask to receive (and then forcing me to take them???).
#storyrambles#it’s not creepy. just for context. it’s just irritating because I’ve told this person repeatedly that I’m not interested in romance.#this person is also naturally a huge romantic so it is next to impossible to tell whether it’s actual flirtation or just flirting for fun#flirting for fun is cool. I wouldn’t mind that. but if I do it once this person will take that as an invitation to do it an excessive amoun#but yeah after being given 12 roses out of the blue when I said ‘no don’t buy me flowers’. there’s only so many things that can mean#‘it’s nice to see your face you always cover it!’ …I’m masking. because of covid#I’m narrating a game and suddenly ‘I like hearing your voice I should call you every day so I can hear it for 10 minutes’. …no.#‘you have to take the snack I brought you know it’s rude to refuse a gift’ I have never refused a gift. It is rude. But also I didn’t ask.#‘you know this game is one you can play without talking so we can play more often!’ we already play games once a week for usually 3 hours.#‘but it’s not talking so it’s less social energy’ no. that is not how it works.#sorry for the rant im just. tired.#you know those people who are so pleasant to hang out with and then they try way too hard#and that’s actually what makes things awkward? rather than when they’re just being themselves?#yeah. that’s this friend here.#usually I go along with the bit but when I can never tell when the bit is actually a bit#and you insist on me taking on the ‘girl role’ for most of them#I am not going to play along.#UGH don’t get me started on the ‘you’re cute when you’re flustered’#I wasn’t even flustered. I was trying to do mental math while running on four hours of sleep and he was staring directly at me#it’s uncomfortable.#also. I never want to hear that again. fuck. ‘you’re cute when you’re angry’ ‘you’re cute when you’re upset’ ALL THE FUCKING TIME AS A KID#will I be so cute after I kick you in the nuts? will I?#(for clarity I don’t want to kick him. I want to kick those other people.)#I need a lot of alone time. I really do. I can do 3 hours and then I will be drained for the rest of the day.#‘how did you grow up? did you not talk to your mom for more than 3 hours a day?’#first of all. that’s different?#secondly we actually regularly do separate things without talking to each other. or go in separate rooms to take some time to ourselves#also I don’t have to be on high alert for if I’m going to be flirted with. so.#ugh. I like him as a friend. I really do. I know this all makes it seem like the opposite. I try so hard to be as nice as possible.#but UGHHHHHH
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I had so much motivation this morning to do stuff but then I fell into a lil depression hole.. but I just went on a walk to get ice cream and I started doing laundry :,-)
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Just applied for a summer childcare position (like for a camp type thing) that pays 20–28 dollars an hour based on qualifications (I should be towards the end of that scale because I work in a school; and the only requirement the job lists is to be 16 and have experience with children). So hopefully they’ll consider me. That would be wonderful.
#I hate applying for jobs so much. Everyone uses a different website that makes you sign up for newsletters that clog your email#that you have to manually unsubscribe to#But yeah that’s way more than I get paid as a para lol#which is kind of sad because being a para or teacher is a lot more strenuous and complex than supervising kids during structured play#Because usually the kids enjoy stuff like rock climbing and swimming#so you don’t have to guide them through ten different layers of mental gymnastics to complete their work#or sometimes physically keep them from leaving the learning area after every problem they complete#(of course I do the last thing very gently; and I don’t like having to carry kids from under tables back to their seats#but they’re not going to learn anything if they stay underneath tables all day long… that kind of defeats the purpose of being in school.#I give a lot of verbal warnings before too. Some kids just refuse to learn all the time regardless of their mood because it’s funny to them#Anyway: Kids should not be playing video games past bedtime on a fucking Oculus Rift#Like seriously the tech withdrawal in some of these babies is palpable#Horrifying#Anyway this summer job will be a breeze if I get it#Hopefully no one will be begging me for chromebooks during rock climbing#(I know it sounds like I’m irritated with the kids; and I am. But it’s more irritation with their parents letting them become addicted#to iPads for the sake of convenience; and also frustration directed at capitalism that makes the parents so tired#that they let the iPad babysit their kids so they can rest. It’s the whole system man. It’s fucked.)
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renarots · 2 months
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Me when I can’t shut my mouth and suddenly ruin the vibes
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Im jus looking at u w big eyes. Tell me what you're autistic about. Infodump get out of jail free card. Any size
oh boy there are. many things. there are so so so many things……. all rattling around my little brain……………….
#obviously art i love u art i love u drawing i LOVE u character design. love love love#i love u videogames hollow knight is my biggest special interest ever it’s literally the best fucking game i’ve ever played i would kill for#it. i would replay it 393748 times it changed my life for the better i think#i just spent like 2 minutes trying to say anything comprehensible about this game but i just. i dont know#i marathon all of mossbag’s videos on a bi-monthly basis if that helps.#extremely autistic about fnaf i have a love-hate relationship with it. it’s literally my life and part of my brain i grew up with it#im never Not thinking about it. but also i can shit all over it sooo bad i can be such a hater of it#ace attorney…. my autidm game. i could never get tired of the characters or the story no matter how much i play#disco elysium <3 i have no words for disco elysium it’s just the best game ever i think. life changing#has kim kitsuragi in there#i love u tv shows i love u gravity falls literally up there with fnaf on the ‘part of my actual life’ shelf#i’ve rewatched it so many times but it never stops being good and the characters never stop being interesting to dissect#i love u steven universe and my love-hate kismesis relationship with it. show that was so perfect but so flawed. but perfect i think#i could go on and on about su im so serious. but i will hold myself back for the greater good#i love u the owl house <3 it is doing everything it can and it is doing so good#i never really got a chance to participate in active analysis and theorizing so that was a good experience for me#got me autistically looking over one single frame to figure out a plot mystery#oughhhhhh i love u anime. chansow man. one pinch man. mop sikey. saiki k. bnha is in there too somewhere#i’m too autistic over bnha sorry i know it’s bad but maybe i just like it when shows are bad and i get to fix them in my head#i get to make everyone my ocs#which by the way im obsessed with my ocs. completely#you guys think im crazy about my fancharacters wait till you see me infodumping about my actual ocs then i might actually explode#ok this is not as long as i wanted to be but i just cant thhink of words when i try to explain how much my interests mean to me#u just have to trust me ok. or wait for a reason for me to go completely ballistic and write like 13k words explaining why hk is the game of#all time. ok (falls over)#cramswering
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seventh-district · 1 day
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i’m not like other girls, my “Rest” stats are a heart rate of 110bpm and a HRV of 14 fucking milliseconds. :)
#Seven’s Public Diary#vent#vent post#cw vent#cw vent post#cw health#cw heart#i’m so stressed :) i am soooo fucking stressed and my body is Suffering because of it#i want to just lay here and stare at the ceiling but. maybe a little venting will help#sighhhh wish [N]MbD Sun were here to obsessively fret over me#he can be mean about it idc. at least i’d have someone acknowledging how bad things are for me#sometimes i wonder when the last time was that my body Wasn’t in fight or flight to some degree#have i Ever actually relaxed#hhhhhhh c-ptsd is a bitch#anyways there’s so much to vent about but i’m. doing my best to be vague. i need to be more vague about things#a lot of stuff i can’t vent about anyways. it’s too personal#so instead i’m gonna complain abt how i haven’t been able to play Genshin or Star Rail for nearly a month now#and about how slowly my back is recovering. it’s like every time i re-injure/have a flare up. it heals.. worse. slower and lesser#i dunno how it’s ever gonna get better. truly better. maybe i’ll live with this forever#if being fat is the problem which is definitely partly is. then yeah i’m fucked#all of my problems just make each other worse and i don’t know where the way out of it all is#every time i think i’ve found it i’m wrong and i just make it all worse#anyways as soon as i figure out how to strengthen my core without breaking my back. it’s over for u bitches#‘u bitches’ being uh. all of the shit that needs doing that i cannot physically fucking do right now#i miss being able to sit down. and i’m Regretting de-converting my standing desk back to sitting bc now. i cannot use my PC#which means i can’t fucking do a some of my work or play my silly little gacha games and i’m mad abt it#i’m mad abt a lot more serious things too but again. can’t talk abt it so i’m gonna focus on trivial shit instead#anyways. sorry as always to everyone i haven’t spoken with lately. and in general. i’m so drained from the Everything that i just. can’t.#it shouldn’t be this hard for me to stay in touch w ppl but. it is. guess i’ll add that onto my list of things to be stressed about#i’m so tired of everything man. and i hate being so negative and mean when im stressed & in pain. makes me feel like im becoming my father
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pendinganchor · 8 months
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(before the post starts: to everyone who follows me for stranger things i’m sorry you have to deal with my random adventures into other fandoms — this is for the marauders fandom so if you don’t care about that feel free to scroll 💞 and also as always fuck jkr)
me: this fic is going to be so fucking full of angst and jealousy and toxicity with rosekiller endgame
also me:
It’s silent for a moment— Barty convinced the Gryffindor’s eyes could bore into his soul if he let him stare long enough. “You’ve never needed to simply feel something, Potter?”
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[Barty] lowered his voice, a hand almost absently reaching up to the other boy’s face. His middle finger ran down his jawline. “What does [Regulus] see in you?”
“What-?”
“He’s never looked at me the way he looks at you. What are you doing that I wasn’t?”
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“I can move. Do you want-“
“No, stay.” James laid back down. It was dark, but Barty reached up anyway. His hand started in James’ hair then ran down to his cheek. His middle finger traced his jaw again— like it had that night on the tower. “I can see what he sees in you now.”
me in some tags AFTER i wrote the stuff above:
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BRO OPEN YOUR FUCKING EYES YOU SHIP IT AND THIS IS HAPPENING
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peapod20001 · 1 year
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I like to think that if my tumblr pals came to my house, they’d have a good time
#random post#I don’t mean that as in ‘yea woo let’s party and get fucked up’ like no lol#I just mean. our house is a place where people get along#there’s no expectations here. wanna sit and talk? we can hang out and talk about whatever#wanna play a game? chances are a few other people do to#need to get away for a bit and maybe take a nap? we’ve got plenty of beds take your pick. we’ll make sure no one bothers you#hungry or thirsty? help yourself don’t be shy. we can always get more#like we had ppl over on Saturday and it was so FUN like ppl would talk all together and then different conversations would split off of that#we would go outside then back in. we had food and some ppl had alcohol#we were laughing SO hard about funny shit (like discovering that my sisters bf worked on the gas meter at grandpas but didn’t SAY ANYTHING#ABOUT IT LMFAO) my cousin brought his gf to meet everyone and she just fit in perfectly and so obviously had an obsession for animals#her and my sister were like sudden bffs it was hilarious. my brother and younger cousin ate at 2:40 and slept upstairs till 6:00#and all we did was turn of the light and put on a fan for em lol. crack up at how comfortable they were#me and my lil sister were walking up and down the driveway talking and looking at the stars. the nap duo were pointing out constellations#when most everyone left it was my household and my sister and her bf. she played uno flip and incoherent with me (usually no one does lol)#and we laughed very hard at all of the adult cards. one of the hints she gave for sidechicks was ‘sad used to have a lot of these’ and#I immediately got it. it was fun. we blasted music from the 2000’s and ate bread#I slept for 11 hours that night lmao and I was tired the next day but I wouldn’t have changed it. I like them lots#it’s days like that that make me think I’m more extroverted than introverted. just because I don’t always know what to say doesn’t mean#I don’t like to talk yn? anyways I’m writing a novel in the tags but I don’t care <3 I just love us and I wish#other people were able to have love and fun times often#I hope this doesn’t sound like me bragging about my home life. trust me I know it’s not some shining light in the darkness or whatever#but it’s something. and I don’t mind sharing my love with other people
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