#I keep feeling bad and then I remember I haven’t actually felt lasting happiness for a year so I can make some people unfollow me it’s fine

[mysunshinetemptress]

Never yours to fix

Alessia Russo x mum!reader

Warnings: angst absent parent, fluff

As a child you dreamed of being a mum, it was something your parents often talked about you constantly carrying your baby doll a girl you had named Gina.

Although you had dreamed of being a mum you never expected it to happen so soon but after your boyfriend knocked you up at the age of 19 you knew no matter what you would love every moment of it. And you did well mostly, you loved the moments it was just you and Teddy or the moments you shared with your family, you hated the moments she would sit watching the door for her Dad to decide he wanted to spend time with her, the moments she cried into your arms stating “daddy not love me.” The moments he cancelled last minute or didn’t show up at all.

Teddy’s heart had been broken so many times that you often felt like you failed her, you hadn’t not by a long shot you where the best mum a 21 year old could be, Teddy was loved and cared for and you made sure she didn’t have to worry about ever feeling hungry..well your dad did after he got you a job in his company but still it was you there to laugh with her when she was her happiest and hold her when she was at her saddest which was more frequent these days after her Dad found himself a new girlfriend. Being caught up in making sure Teddy was loved and happy you often neglected it for yourself but you couldn’t possibly bring in a new person to your life scared Teddy would get attached and then become even more heartbroken when it eventually turned bad. That was until you met her.

Teddy was staying with your parents while you and your brother attended Manchester United vs Newcastle at Old Trafford, since you where kids both you and your brother held season tickets and although you still bought it you hadn’t used yours in two since having your daughter. Seats picked right beside the directors box at the Bobby Charlton stand you both got comfortable catching up.

You both sat with batted breath as you watch the boys in red try tirelessly to defend sighing and dropping your head in disappointment turning when you heard a laugh, eyes catching two girls sat beside you. The brunette turned before locking eyes with you and smiling sheepishly hitting the blonde girl beside her “sorry, it’s not funny I know but if I don’t laugh I’ll cry.” It was your turn to laugh before nodding “that’s understandable haven’t seen them preform as good as they should be since I was a kid if I’m being honest but once a red always a red so I’ll keep coming.” The girls smiled at you “I’m Y/n and this is my brother Jamie.” The brunette smiled “I’m..” Jamie laughed “oh we know who you are best number seven for United and Alessia the traitor.” You thumped Jamie’s arm at the last part “sorry ignore him he wishes he was half as decent as you Alessia.” The girls laughed as the whistle sounded for half time “right my turn to buy drinks.” You dragged your brother up before turning to the girls “you guys coming “oh no we…”. You smiled “come on it’s on me please.” The both nodded standing before following you to the drinks stand.

Arriving back to your seats Ella was pulled away spotting a family friend so Alessia had decided to take her seat beside you as you both struck up a conversation “so how long have you been a United fan for.” You shrugged thinking “god don’t think I can remember but my entire life really, Dads a red used to live by Busby way as a kid then he met mum, Mum moved from Ireland when she was 22 they met shortly after in the Stretford end actually, got married and when the business did well moved to Hale had My brother then me and the rest is history.” Alessia smiled at your little story “sorry just realised I told you my entire life story.” Alessia laughed nah it’s all good “I’m a red as well although I grew down south, my Dad is a massive fan. My brothers and I followed after him my mum she isn’t really into it but she’ll watch if I’m playing.” You smiled “that’s really cute.” You both continued talking not even realising the final whistle had blown until Jamie shuck your shoulder “ready.” You looked around “oh, well I best be off it was really nice to meet you Alessia.” You stood slowly smiling at the girl as Alessia shot from her seat “wait, I’d ehm well I…you don’t have to.. I mean I don’t even know if this is what your into…oh god spit it out… would you like to go out with me tomorrow.” You looked at her surprised “like a date.” Alessia nodded “yeah…I had a really nice time with you and I would love to do it again if you are free.” You stood thinking before turning to Jamie “I got T don’t worry.” You smiled great fully “I’d love to here out your number in.”

It was your second date when you finally told Alessia about Teddy. “I really like you and before this goes any further I need to tell you something.” Alessia grabbed your hand across the table “breath Y/n.” You looked at her eyes wide in worry “I have a daughter, Teddy..she ehm she’s two and my entire world and listen I understand if this is all to much for you and before you get up and leave just know I have had the best time with you these past few weeks.” Alessia let go of your hand eyes wide in shock “Teddy.” You nodded head dropping slightly “oh my god that is the cutest name ever have you got photos oh when can I meet her, does she have a favourite show, favourite princess, does she like football tell me everything.” You looked at her in shock before bursting into tears as Alessia got up to move beside you “oh shit Y/n I’m sorry.” You shook your head “no I’m sorry I god it’s just I love her so much and I was so scared of telling you in fear you wouldn’t like me anymore because I really like you.” You spent the rest of the night show Less videos of Teddy and telling her all about her and Alessia found herself falling fast watching your eyes sparkle as you talked about your daughter buzzing in anticipation to meet her.

A month after Alessia finally asked you to be her girlfriend you decided it was time to introduce her to Teddy so you invited Alessia around for lunch “hey baby remember Mummy has someone special coming to visit today Teddy hummed focused on playing with her toys “I know your my best girl but I need you to promise me you will be good.” Teddy looked up eyes big “I promise I good girl Mama.” You smiled spreading your arms “ok come give me a hug and a kiss.” Teddy ran over smiling wrapping her little arms around you before wiggling out to go back to playing. Shortly after the doorbell rang and your nerves spiked at the thought of Alessia actually being here.

You opened the door smiling softly as she pulled you in for a hug “hi gorgeous.” You pulled back kissing her cheek before asking “ready.” Alessia nodded excitedly “so ready I’m absolutely buzzin to meet her.” You laughed pulling her in hands locked together “Hey T can you come here a second there is someone I want you to meet.” Teddy threw her toys down jumping up from the floor and raced towards you putting her hands in the air “up mama.” You smiled letting go of Alessia’s hand picking her up as she rested her head on your chest “hey love this is the person I was telling you about, her name is Alessia can you say hi.” Teddy looked at the blonde studying her before smiling “hi lessia I Teddy.”you looked at the older girl smiling as she laughed “hi Teddy your so pretty aren’t you.” It was Teddy’s turn to laugh before she reached over for Alessia’s hair “hair like Punzle.” You smiled nodding “yeah Alessia does have hair like Rapunzle.” Teddy lifted her head getting more comfortable with your girlfriend “you a princess.” Alessia smiled shaking her head “Alessia plays football she’s not a princess.” Teddy’s eyes widened as a smile took over her face “I love football, like my mama and uncle jam and Grandpa.” Alessia smiled as Teddy wiggled letting you know she wanted to be put down before she grabbed Alessia’s hand “I show you I show you.” You nodded at the older girl “go I’ll start lunch.”

It’s safe to say the first meeting was a hit Alessia ended up staying until well after Teddy went to bed your daughter the happiest you had seen her in awhile “oh god Y/n she’s amazing, really amazing and she absolutely adores you.” You smiled resting your head on Alessia’s shoulder as you watched the tv “well I can say the same about you I think today might be her favourite out of the year, you made her laugh more today then I have been able to these last few weeks.” Alessia squeezed you tightly “if you’ll let me I would love to spend more time with the both of you. You’re my girlfriend, I care about you a lot and I care about her a lot too, I don’t plan on leaving, that is unless you want me to but we’ll from the moment I met you at Old Trafford I couldn’t help the butterflies and I don’t ever want them to stop.” You smiled pulling her into a kiss “I’d love nothing more than for you to stick around.”

You and Alessia fell into a routine something you had asked for as to not get Teddy all mixed up. Alessia face timed on the nights she wasn’t up in Manchester which at the start was frequently as she lived in London but after the first night she stayed over and how happy Teddy was afterwards it happened more frequently, so Sunday nights Alessia traveled to yours and would be there when Teddy awoke the next morning she would leave then Monday night and be back Wednesday night and Thursday night before heading back down to do it all over again.

That happened without a hiccup for a few weeks until your ex decided he wanted to start seeing Teddy again, you had forgotten to tell Less that Teddy was at her dads on the Wednesday and you definitely didn’t miss the disappointment on her face when she came through the front door waiting on the 2 yr old to jump at her only to be met with silence “sorry darling, I completely forgot Mickey came to get her this morning he’s back on his “I love my daughter and want to see her” phase again but she’ll be home tomorrow.” Alessia nodded “oh ok, we’ll how about we go out for dinner then.” You smiled kissing her softly “ok sounds good.”

That happened for three more weeks until you where sat at dinner laughing about Alessia being clumsy like always when your phone rang “sorry Less it’s Mickey let me get it.” You stood up walking away from the table answering your phone before you rushed back 5 minutes later “hey hey Y/n what’s going on.” You picked up everything taking out the money for the meal “it’s Teddy, Mickey never picked her up from my parents house I have to go get her I’m really sorry less I have to go get her.” Alessia shook her head “hey it’s ok let me drive yeah we will both go get her.” You smiled at her taking her hand as you both left to get your daughter.

You raced up the driveway Alessia following after you as you knocked on the door, before looking at your dad “where is she.” Your Dad stepped aside as you walked through the house finding your daughter cuddled up to your brother hiccuping “hey Pumpkin.” Teddy’s head shot up at the sound of your voice “Mama.” You kneeled down in front of her “oh baby I’m so sorry.” Teddy crawled off Jamie’s lap before wrapping herself around you “No Daddy.” You dropped your head sighing “I’m sorry baby.” Teddy lifted her head seeing Alessia standing behind you putting her hands out for the Blonde as you passed her over “no daddy Less.” Alessia looked at you trying to work out what to say “I’m sorry T.” Teddy began playing with Alessia’s hair “you stay.” Alessia nodded “I’m staying as long as you want piccola Stella.” Teddy’s little chin began to wobble “no go stay.” Alessia nodded “I promise it’s ok I’m staying.” Teddy began crying feeling overwhelmed.

Alessia was there for Teddy and you after that more so then she had been, she left London earlier to spend more time in Manchester with you both and often stayed longer then she was allowed to with training, but she didn’t care “Teddy needs me, you need me, I’ll stay as long as I have go to make sure she isn’t going to bed crying over that idiot who doesn’t deserve her.” You cried into her arms that night.

A few months later Mickey fell back into his phase only this time Teddy was an awful lot more reluctant to go with him stating “no stay, stay with Mama and Lessia no go Daddy.” Mickey wasn’t to happy about that often screaming down the phone at you stating “how dare you take my daughter away from me you and that bitch blonde.” You hung up on him only for him to come banging on the door. You turned at the noise before looking at Teddy “hey Pumpkin you stay here ok I have to go answer the door Less will be here shortly ok.” Teddy nodded watching the TV. Opening the door stood Mickey “where is she.” You sighed “she doesn’t want to see you.” Mickey shook his head “bullshit she’s two she can’t make up her own mind over what tutu to wear, I won’t ask again Y/n where is she.” You moved slightly as her tried to push past you “for the sake of our daughters happiness im sorry Mickey but no, you do this every few weeks, you get this itch to spend time with her like you’re supposed to and then you push her to the side when you get fed up, she is a two year old child not a toy you can’t keep doing that to her, her tiny heart breaks every time and I’m tired of trying to tell her you love her when you clearly don’t and she is starting to realise.” Mickey pushed you back into the hall “Fuck you she is my kid, you can’t keep her from me TEDDY ITS DADDY LETS GO.” Teddy stood up from the couch running to the door peaking out “hey T.” Teddy shook her head “not my name.” Mickey looked at her confused “yeah it is.” Teddy shook her head again “only Mama and Less allowed not daddy.” Mickey looked at you anger sparking in his eyes “what but I’m your Daddy.” Teddy nodded “yeah but Daddy not love me, Mama and Less love me.” Mickey turned to you “what bullshit have you been feeding her, how…how dare you turn her against me, I’m taking you to court you bitch you can’t keep her from me.” Mickey had you pushed against the wall now as Teddy began to cry, just on time Alessia came through the door “I’d take your hands off her if I where you Mickey.” Teddy ran past you both to Alessia putting her hands up as Alessia lifted her up “you should go.” Mickey shook his head “I’m not leaving without my daughter.” Teddy ducked her head into Alessia neck “yeah you are, your not taking her like this, especially not when you are this angry so I won’t ask again leave, take a few days and when you have calmed the hell down try it again in a nicer manner.” Mickey stepped forward but you stopped him placing your hand on his chest “you have broken her heart enough Mickey, don’t make her fear you as well.” Mickey stopped looking at Teddy “I’m sorry baby, I’ll see you soon.” Mickey walked out after that as you looked at your daughter crying in Alessia’s arms.

Sighing you placed Teddy in bed kissing her head before stepping back into Alessia’s arms. “You ok amore mio.” You nodded “I love you.” Alessia froze for a minute before pulling you closer “I love you too.” You turned facing her “I never got to thank you.” Alessia looked at you confused “for what Y/n.” You looked back at Teddy’s sleeping form “we where….we where never yours to fix but you have, I was so scared of love until I met you and Teddy never knew love like yours existed until she met you, you have made us both the happiest girls in the world these past few months and you have eased my worries…I feared she would cry watching the door every day for the rest of her life for her father to love her like she deserves but you…you have loved her since I told you about her in the restaurant and I know she will never have to worry about being heart broken by you, that she will never have to sit watching the door for you..so thank you for fixing what was never yours to fix but loving us both enough to do it.” Alessia smiled pulling you into a kiss “I would do it again in a heartbeat.” You kissed her pulling her impossibly closer. “I love you.” You smiled “we love you too.”

#awfc #leah williamson #woso #woso fanfics #woso one shot #woso imagine #alessia russo #alessia russo x y/n #alessia russo x reader #alessia russo x you #ella toone #muwfc #arsenal wfc #man united wfc #man united women #arsenal women

[mrslankyman]

K.

Mike Schmidt x (fem) Reader

No fnaf timeline

Mike can’t remember the last time he had actually gone out with someone. Had a relationship and was happy. Maybe you weren’t a relationship but you were a friend.

A friend with benefits.

He often found himself calling you up at work. Maybe it wasn’t important but he wanted to talk to you. He met you as he worked night shift. You’d be leaving your day shift shift. It started with a hello. Then it evolved. He didn’t talk much at first. Keeping to himself. Not even looking in your direction. Now all he could think of was you.

He’d call you on the work phone. Just wanting to chat. Stating the night shift was boring. You agreed apologizing constantly about taking the only day shift option. He didn’t want you to worry. Sure day shift would make his life easier but. If it meant getting to see you he’d risk his sleep.

He had told you about Abby. How he fights for custody all the time. How his brother went missing. His dreams. He opened up. He had a friend. Finally someone to talk to.

He didn’t notice his feelings till later though.

He didn’t even know he had feelings. He never knew what this was supposed to feel like. He would see you and smile. You’d smile back and he wondered why his face became warm.

It wasn’t till the night he called you up. It was a Saturday. He called on his house phone this time. Abby was at a friends house. He invited you over.

You just hung out. Chatted. This became a normal thing.

Abby would go to a friends and you’d come over. Hang out and talk.

This one time though. Was different.

——

“You mean you’ve never kissed someone?” You teased him his face turned red from embarrassment. “No I haven’t..” he looked down. A laugh escaped your lips. “Well we’ve gotta change that. Come here.” A risk in the relationship. He looked at you worried. “You sure?” He asked as he leaned a little closer. You sat on the couch side by side. Watching some random tv show. Honestly you weren’t even watching it anymore. Too busy talking.

“Yeah. Why not?” You leaned in and winked at him. “No strings attached.” You offered as he nodded. You kissed. A soft, sweet, and slow kiss.

Which slowly turned into a make out sesh. Which then slowly lead you to the bed room. He wasn’t too bad. Being he never did any of this before. He stated his life never consisted of really talking to anyone romantically.

Though he liked the idea of no strings attached. Not having to worrying if he was sure on this or not.

——

So that’s how it started. On Saturday’s you either chatted, made out or did more. No strings attached. No feelings hurt. You were just friends with benefits.

Till he offered to take you out to a restaurant. You had just had sex. Some of the best now you’ve ever had. He had gotten pretty good.

You sit at the booth. Chatting. Eating. Though as you stared at him you felt something more. The No strings attached you had said a few months ago was becoming harder to abide by.

The way he’d moan your name in bed. The way he groaned when you made out. How he always asked if you were sure you wanted to do something. Now dinner?

You two had finished up and were waiting for the check. He looked at you. And in that moment he knew something had changed. The way you were looking at him was different.

His face flushed slightly. In that instant he knew you liked him back. He was tired of playing the facade now. The No strings attached wasn’t exactly what he wanted anymore. He wanted all the strings.

He wanted you wrapped around him. Not only in the sexual sense but. At night when you were asleep. Cuddled up to him. He wanted you to wrap your arms around him when you were sad as well. As you let him do when he was.

He paid the bill. Took you back to his place. Abby was having a sleep over he stated. He wanted you to stay. You agreed. Though your heart ached to know that this was just as friends.

Mikes heart raced to know that this wasn’t just as friends. He knew this was more. He needed to show you.

——

As you lay in his bed something felt different. There was no sexual advances. No Mike begging you to do something. Not that he ever did but..wasn’t that all you ever came to his bedroom for?

He wrapped his arms around you gently. Pulling you to his chest. You tried to get up. Wanted to leave. This hurt.. it really hurt your heart.

“Stay with me, I don’t want you to leave.” He whispered in your ear. “Mike..”. You sighed. He had a choke hold on you.

“I like you.. I don’t want to lose you. No strings attached isn’t what I want anymore. I don’t want you with anyone else because.. I like you best when you’re just with me.” His voice was husky. His face nuzzled in the crook of your neck. A blush covered both your faces.

“I like you too Mike..” was all you said. Tears streamed down your face. He pulled you closer. This time you felt loved. You didn’t feel like it was all just for fun. For a high off the feeling. It felt real this time. He pulled you closer to hold you. Not to get deeper in you.

“Will you stay with me?” He whispered softly. His voice filled with much more affection than you’d ever heard it with.

“Yes.” You whispered back. He kissed your cheek and you both fell asleep.

You realized then that he was yours all strings attached.

#mike schimdt x reader #mike schmidt #josh hutcherson #fnaf fanfic #fnaf movie #fnaf

[sp00kymulderr]

💭 i’d love a drabble with ''you don't have to pretend with me.'' for either dave or joel <3

Dave York x afab!reader

18+, unhappy marriage, infidelity, feelings, lil bit of oral

750ish words

eee thank you for this, Jana! I decided to challenge myself and write your man for the first time ever.

A life spent pretending, what kind of life is that?

Over and over again you have lied and forced a smile and faked your happiness so as not to bruise the ego of someone else. It’s not a way to live, you know that, but the fear takes hold and it seems impossible to change.

Your husband isn’t a bad man. He isn’t a monster or any kind of villain. He’s just a man, and you need more. Maybe you had loved him once, maybe he’d made you happy in the past. It all feels so very long ago, you’ve been faking for years. Pretending becomes your natural state of being. More normal than reality, more honest than truth.

Until you meet Dave.

Veracious, stable, authentic. Strong in ways you didn’t know someone could be. He seems to you so out of place in your world made up of falsehoods, even when you know so little of him. He felt unfamiliar to you and yet in so many ways like the truest thing you could ever know, you were the unworthy moth to Dave’s righteous flame from the outset.

Your hands shake now as he lays you down on your bed. Finally, finally a night alone and he has come to keep you company. You should feel guilt you think, as he undresses you and buries himself between your legs. Instead you feel things you haven’t felt in a lifetime, as your fingers bunch in the fabric of the new bedsheets you and your husband had picked out last weekend.

This feeling scares you. It doesn’t feel real. Dave’s warm breath on your cunt, the groan of pleasure as he laps you up and calls you sweet thing. The hot clench in your core is unfamiliar and you barely remember what to do with it - when was the last time someone pulled you apart with their mouth, their tongue? It feels like never with the way he does this now.

The building pleasure doesn’t feel right and you don’t feel like yourself for a moment because this isn’t how it goes. Your skin feels too tight, suddenly, and Dave is so lost in you he is unaware of the turmoil behind your eyes. What if it’s wrong, the way it happens? You cannot break past the anxiety of being bad at feeling this.

So you do what you know, what you have done for so many years now it feels like actuality. You bury the real feeling and you lie - you make your body arch, your breath shorten, you make your moans louder and feel sick at yourself for the comfort you find in the pretend once more.

You let out a low breath and Dave pulls himself away, looking up at you from between your legs. His brown eyes are dark with concern, or is it anger, disappointment? You can’t tell. Real feelings are beyond you.

“What was that?” He asks, accusing tone making you squirm and push yourself up the bed a little away from him.

“I- I…finished” You lie. Your body is too hot and damn it, the discontent in his gaze makes tears spring in your eyes.

You think for a second he is going to scold you. You’re caught in a lie, and it feels like the end. But instead he scoots up the bed to sit next to you, and gently caresses your cheek.

“You can tell me, you know” He smiles kindly and your heart flutters. This thing you are caught in, it’s impossible to ignore the descending reality of it when he views you like that. He is calm and good and won’t hurt you, despite the fears that have always kept you at bay.

“You can tell me if I did something wrong, something you didn’t like. You shouldn’t…” 

A beat, a breath. You blink back tears and he turns your head by the chin to meet his eyes.

“I’m sorry” you murmur. He grips your chin just a little bit tighter when your eyes dart away from his for a moment.

“You shouldn’t have to pretend”

“I don’t…I…” You shake your head and struggle to explain. There’s something in him that makes you think he knows what you mean to say. Dave leans forward, his lips meeting yours. It’s gentle and reassuring, not possessive or demanding like you always expect.

“You don’t have to pretend with me” He’s kissing you again, finding a part of you that you had forgotten existed.

“Please don’t pretend with me”

#sp00ky follower celebration #💭 #dave york x reader #dave york x you #ppcu fanfiction #if this is horribly ooc i'm sorry he's very new to me!

[yourlocalartsonist]

ROTTMNT Moths Fly In Packs - Chapter Three

A/N: HEY IM ALIVE. I am so sorry it’s been two literal weeks I got stuck in a rut and then like couldn’t figure out how to write from there for the life of me 🫠 BUT HEY I figured it out eventually and Ngl I think this chapter turned out pretty fun and cute! It is the first time I wrote Mikey for a long period of time and a little bit of Donnie too so like, apologies for any OOC moments. I’m still learning TvT But yesyes, enjoy the read and thank you for your time <3 Also I’ve decided Mikey and Salena’s duo name is gonna be Pink Tangerine anyway byeeeeeeeee

Next Chapter

Previous Chapter

Chapter One

Disclaimer: Chapter involves light manipulation, light sexual harassment, curse words, and violence. If you’re sensitive to that stuff, scroll past and stay safe <3

—

The mushy brown grub splat down on my tray.

I stuck out my tongue in disgust. School lunch might honestly be the worst thing known to man, the bar is so low the devil plays limbo with it. Yet somehow this school still puts everywhere else to shame.

I overheard from some of the upperclassmen a while back that the food used to be on par with others, apparently it got worse after they hired a new lunch aid. No one ever told him anything, though. We’re all way too scared of him.

We sat down at a table and I began poking the food with my fork, mentally preparing to stomach it down. Jaiden looked at me with similarly dead eyes from our meal.

“God, this is so gross. I get that this lunch is supposed to be healthy and all but sometimes I’d rather just eat burger grease.”

That was the second reason I never said anything to the lunch aid. As much as I shit on the food, it’s actually healthier than the usual microwaved fries and stuff. I’ve noticed the effects too, ever since I joined Roosevelt High last year my body admittedly felt much less sluggish.

“Well, food is food. Let’s just be grateful it’s even human food at this point.”

They giggled and scoffed. “Yeah, barely.”

Trying to distract myself from how squishy my mouth felt at every bite, I focused on Jaiden instead. They don’t really emote often, they’re the type of person to have a resting-bitch-face 24/7. But of course, one of life’s greatest ironies was blessing Jaiden with one of the heartiest smiles I’ve ever seen.

For a moment their lips curve, their forehead wrinkles, and their tooth gap is on full display. Eyes shut, all their thoughts were too focused on whatever brought them so much glee, completely forgetting to worry about how they looked or were being perceived. I wish they could be like that all the time.

“Hello? You’re staring at me like a creep again.”

“I know, I know. I’ll stop.” I rolled my eyes, knowing they didn’t actually mind.

“You really should smile more often, though. You’re gifted with such a pretty smile but you never show it off, Jay.”

It went quiet. Before I could spend too long worrying if I said the wrong thing, they broke the silence.

“Hey, can I talk to you about something?”

“Is that even a question? You know you can tell me anything.”

“Well yeah but…it’s kinda relationship related.”

Oh dear. I straightened up and focused all my attention on them. I may be ass at understanding romance but by god, I still tried my best to help Jaiden with theirs.

“So…Was he distant again?”

“I mean, yeah technically. But it’s not even just him anymore, I haven’t been the best at reaching out either. I don’t want anyone else to know this so you better keep it a secret.”

I nodded and they continued.

“I guess I just can’t find any reason to catch up with him. He barely talks to me, stopped complimenting me, and I just can’t like him like that when it feels like he doesn’t even remember we’re dating. I haven’t felt happy with him or confident or anything cause he doesn’t! Talk! About! Me!”

“Ah y-yeah, that’s…that’s pretty bad.”

“He knows how I feel about this stuff. I’m worried he’s not into me anymore. I haven’t felt beautiful in so long because of him. I feel invisible Salena.”

I thought back to our old school. Jaiden had a huge crush on one of our classmates and miraculously got asked out by him just a year later. It was quite the celebratory moment, we stayed up for hours gushing about it over the phone that night. That memory still makes me feel warm.

“What are you gonna do now?”

“That’s what I don’t know. I’m not sure what to do or how to take all of this. Nothing really feels the same anymore.” Their face fell back to its usual deadpan stare. “Honestly, I’m wondering if it would be better to just break things off.”

“…Well, whatever happens, I’m here for you.”

We sat in awkward silence. I wish I was better at comforting people. Jaiden isn’t a huge hugger either so I can’t even try that.

“By the way I…I think I’m starting to like someone else, actually.”

Their voice was barely above a whisper. Before I could ask who, a tray slammed down between us.

“Hey, guys - Jaiden move over a bit - what’d I miss?”

“Hey Zane!”

“Hiya Zane.” I gave him a small wave and Jaiden and I made room for him between us.

I started zoning out a bit while Jaiden and Zane caught up with each other. My mind wouldn’t stop thinking about what Jaiden said. That they like someone else. I mean, it’s not a wild idea considering how they and their boyfriend barely count as a couple anymore but still. Last I checked, Jaiden pretty much loathed the kids in our grade and neither of us get crushes that easily so I wonder who actually got their heart all soft.

I jumped from a sudden sharp pain in my legs. Jaiden and Zane’s conversation paused as they redirected their attention to me and my agony.

“Hey dude, are you okay?”

“Yep! I’m fine, just been working my legs a bit too much I suppose!”

Damn it Leo and your stupid persuasiveness.

What he promised would only be a “weekend thing” turned into an “almost every night thing”, leading to my legs cursing me out from how much pain consistent parkour brings them. Worst part is I can’t even blame him entirely, I’m a druggie for dopamine and caved in at the first mention of doing it more often.

“Are you sure you’re alright? Your legs keep hurting lately. Do you need painkillers? Or do you wanna go to the nurse? I can take you there!” Zane reached out and grabbed my hand.

I could feel the hair on my arms rising for the wrong reasons. Panicking, I pulled my hand back and rushed to reassure them both I was perfectly okay. Thankfully, we moved on and Zane started to ramble about some guy in his class annoying him today.

Or at least, he moved on. I was still trying to recover from the contact. I mean, this isn’t the first time he’s held my hand, our friendship was always very physically affectionate. But I just haven’t been able to handle any touch from Zane for a while. I hate that everything feels so different now knowing that he likes me. It’s not like he can control it, why do I have to be so weird about it? A little hand-holding shouldn’t get such a repulsed reaction from me.

I decided to stop my brain’s downwards spiral and calm myself down. I took a quiet breath and joined back in the conversation.

I caught Jaiden glancing at his hand. They were quieter than usual after that.

***

I walked out the building as the school day ended, the afternoon sun lit up the schoolyard. The weather was getting pleasantly warmer as spring truly settled in.

Zane walked beside me with a lollipop in his mouth as we both waited for Jaiden. The two of them have an elective today but Jaiden had to run a quick question by the teacher and told me to keep Zane company for the time being. I had my own plans but it’s no biggie, all electives start ten minutes after school ends so we’ve got time. I already let Mikey know I’d be running a little late.

“I know I’m not Mr. Sunshine or anything, but I’d be lying if I said it isn’t gorgeous out today.”

“Hm? Oh, yeah, it really is!”

“...You’re still thinking about Jaiden aren’t you?”

“Y-yeah sorry.”

I could tell Zane was getting a bit irritated. My attention hadn’t really been on him much today, I just couldn’t shake the feeling something was wrong with Jaiden. I know they don’t really talk much but they got abnormally quiet after lunch even for them.

“I told you they’re fine Salena. I even checked in twice for your sake.”

“I know it’s just… Nevermind, you know me, I get paranoid easily.” That’s only half true. I’m paranoid but I’m not stupid.

“Hey actually, I was wondering.” He leaned closer and started playing with a loose strand of my hair, prompting me to lean away “Jaiden seemed really tired today so maybe they’d wanna go home early and rest. Do you want to-“

“I’m here.”

They stared at us with a frown on their face. Their voice was monotone. It was always monotone but usually it’d have a bit of charm mixed in with the whole dead-inside vibe. Something wasn’t right.

But no matter! They’re both here now and I should honestly get going. Zane’s here with them so I can worry about Jaiden tomorrow.

“Great! Seeing as you two are ready to go, I shall take my leave as well. Bye guys!”

“But-“

They cut him off. “Bye Salena.”

I don’t know what I did but something definitely happened with Jaiden.

Even though I didn’t manage to fully suppress my thoughts, the walk to the alley where we agreed to meet drifted my attention back towards the beautiful sunny day. The sky was cloudless, a soft spring breeze. For once the air wasn’t clouded with the stinging scent of garbage and car smoke and instead smelled fresh. Woodsy even. Don’t really get a day this perfect often here. It must’ve been fate for today to be the day I’m actually spending time with one of the guys.

Thanks to Leo’s reassurance that night, I gained some confidence and took his advice on talking with them more often. Mikey was definitely the most receptive to that. He and I bonded pretty quickly due to us being the same age and having a similar (and superior) artistic taste so obviously I had to say yes when he asked to hang out, even if it took a while for our schedules to line up.

I did one last scan to make sure no one was around before texting Mikey of my arrival. He popped out from behind a dumpster, eyes matching the bright blue sky.

“Hey hey hey! Ready for the world’s most epic hang out ever?”

“Hell yes I am! I’ve been waiting for this all week! But uh, you’re 100% sure being out in public during the day won’t be a problem considering…this whole situation?”

“We’re fine, chill. No one will recognize me with my super amazing Raph-approved disguise on!”

…His disguise was a hoodie and pants.

I mean, I guess it is New York so no one will probably care enough to notice. Or care even after they do notice. I think I’m just a little nervous since it’s my first time out in public with him.

Besides, his fit was on fire! He wore a cropped orange hoodie with white accents matched with baggy, light cargo pants. He actually looked a little taller from the pairing, maybe I should take fashion tips from him. He did remind me a little of those orange-and-creme popsicle sticks though.

I heard thumping in the distance and cocked my head to hear better.

Clomp, clomp, clomp.

Footsteps? Loud, heavy ones. They remind me of…

“Mikey, you have to hide! S-someone’s coming!”

“But I’m disgui-”

“Trust me just go!”

As he jumped back behind the dumpster, Zane came around the corner and found me leaning against the wall pretending to be on my phone. I mentally high-fived myself for the spot-on guess.

“There you are.”

“Hey! Did you need something?”

“Oh, no. Or well, yeah actually but first, what are you doing next to a garbage bin?”

“I’m waiting for my friend. We have plans today.”

“W-what?” His brows furrowed, pained eyes pierced mine “Plans? With who? Jaiden isn’t even free today.”

“I have other friends too, Zane.”

He scoffed and shoved his hands down his pockets.

“Like, who? Druggies?” …Homie what the hell?

“What kind of people are you friends with that have you meet up with them here?”

“Uh, why are you getting so mad anyway? I’m just meeting up with someone.”

“Well, I don’t want that someone to be dangerous! I’m just looking out for you.” He sighed. “And also because I was gonna ask if you wanted to hang out with me today.”

Confused, I stared back at him. “But you and Jaiden have an elective today? The one I just left you two at?”

“Yeah and I told Jaiden I was gonna skip. It’s a nice day, I wanted to be with you. Looks like I did all that for nothing.” Another sigh.

“Oh. I-I’m sorry, I didn’t know- Wait, hold on, you left Jaiden?” Oh god. I subconsciously started biting my nails. “Zane, they were already visibly upset today! They need someone with them!”

Stomping my feet, I tried searching for a solution. I couldn’t just cancel on Mikey, we’ve had this planned for so long! But I can’t leave Jaiden on their own either. They have certain tendencies and I can’t risk that again. Ugh, everything would’ve been okay if at least Zane was with them!

“Zane, you have to go back. Jaiden needs company and I’m busy today anyway.”

“Don’t panic so much, they said they’d be fine.”

“And you believed that? You know they’ve lied about that before. Several times before! They didn’t seem okay, I need you to be them.”

“But I want to be with you. Not Jaiden, you. You can’t expect me to just control these things, Salena.”

This dude! Why is he being so difficult?

Okay, calm down Salena. Not a time for anger.

“I-I know, but it’s just one day. Jaiden’s your friend, too. And besides, you’ll both have fun this way!”

My attempts to shoo him away changed his angered face. He suddenly looked so disheartened I can’t tell if it was better or worse. I’m a little annoyed he left Jaiden on their own but he must’ve planned this out for a while if he seems this disappointed. I guess I’d be upset too if I was in his shoes. Though I also would’ve asked the other person ahead of time but different people, different mindsets I suppose. I softened my tone.

“Hey, Zane? I promise we’ll hang out tomorrow. I’ll make it up to you. And we can even call when I’m done, okay? But right now Jaiden needs you. And I need this. Just…can I please have a few hours away today?”

He looked at me, conflicting eyes switching between both of mine. Third sigh, more whispery than the others “...Fine, you know I can’t say no to you. I’ll see you tomorrow.” He pat my head, slightly ruffling my hair “Don’t forget to call me when you’re free.”

Hearing the heavy steps fade as he got farther and farther away, I let out the biggest exhale of my life as my body slumped over.

“Ooh mama, that was rough.” Mikey, somehow already next to me, matched my relief. “Does he always act like that?”

“Well, ‘always’ is a strong word…”

“And you’ve never told him how you feel about it? Never, you know, put down boundaries?”

My eyes scampered around to focus on anything but his face while my body shrunk. Guilty as charged.

He sighed and whipped out a pair of round glasses, swinging his arm over my shoulder “So, I know Dr. Feelings is supposed to be on vacation for the day, but since you’re a friend you get special privileges!”

“Um…D-Doctor who?”

“Tell me about this guy, Salena.”

After recovering from the reveal of his secret therapist mode, I told Mikey about Zane and our friendship as we made our way to an ice cream parlor. According to him, talking about your feelings is always better with a sweet treat to distract you from your crushing crippling depression.

“Wait wait, before we start, what flavor?”

“Oh, chocolate obviously.”

His eyes lit up as he happily hummed “A person of culture! Begin~” He handed me a chocolate cone and got the same for himself.

I felt a little guilty for using him on a day we were meant to relax but at the same time, the thought of having someone to talk to about my weird dynamic with Zane made it weirdly hard to resist. Plus, Mikey just has a very calming presence to him, one that makes it so easy to open up and word-vomit your entire life story to.

Still, I tried my best to not overshare and disrespect Zane’s privacy so I kept things brief and broad, only mentioning what I felt was note-worthy. And probably better to keep his crush on me hidden for now, at least.

Instead, I briefed him about Zane’s home life being the classic “rich kid with absent and narcissistic parents” trope and how much his older brother, or better known as the golden child, emotionally abused him growing up. I could sense Mikey softened a bit at that.

I mentioned Zane’s anger issues, habitual bullying, fear of abandonment. His slowly-developed kleptomania. I told him about the people Zane hung out with and of my secret disapproval of them. If Zane seems bad, those guys make him seem heavenly.

And lastly, I talked about our unlikely friendship. How he gradually became nicer to me. How he told me how different I was to him the day I asked why he stopped bullying me. How unexpectedly sweet and protective he can be.

And how scared he’d get sometimes that one day I’d just ditch him like everyone else did.

“That’s awful! It must’ve been hard for him dealing with all of that.”

“It was. That’s why he’s so clingy towards me. He feels like no one understands him the way I do or even wants to try.”

“I’m guessing that’s why you deal with it.”

I quietly nodded. “I know he can be a bit much sometimes. But I don’t ever want to leave him. He’s like family to me, it just wouldn't be right if I abandoned him.”

Mikey smiled at me “Yeah, don’t worry, I get that.”

He took another bite of his cone and stared out the window. He looked strangely timid, I’ve never seen Mikey so mild-mannered before.

“Do you remember when I told you about our dad Draxum?”

“Oh yeah, the sheep guy! You mentioned he had a ‘bad boy’ phase. Heh, ba-a-a-a-a-ad.” I giggled to myself mimicking a sheep as Mikey looked at me with horrific disgust.

“Leo must love you, doesn’t he.”

“Oh hush, it was funny. Anyway, you were saying?~”

“Well during his ‘insert ruined joke here’ phase, Draxum used to try to kill us like at least once a week. He went on and on about wanting to ‘destroy humanity’ and ‘protect Yōkai kind’ and we were made to do that.”

We started walking outside as he continued his story.

“But, my brothers and I could never. We love humans, I mean you guys literally invented art! And even though Draxum made us, he wasn’t attached enough to not brutally murder us for that disagreement. He threw Leo off a roof once, too.”

“Sorry, what now?” It’s making sense now why Leo was so careful about me not falling when we hang out.

“Yeah, I felt so bad! I mean, Raph gets to see something as cool as that happen but I’m stuck being used as a tug-of-war rope for a giant spider lady! The universe can be so unfair…”

“Your priorities are confusing but go on.”

We made our way on to a roof to enjoy the city’s view. Mikey went on a tangent about all their adventures stopping Draxum and the poorly-named Foot Clan from assembling this mythical shredding monster guy. Whoever named these guys needs originality lessons.

“Then after they finished making the Shredder, they betrayed Draxum. They only wanted to use him so the armor thing would work. And I know that we’re supposed to hate him and stuff, but I felt really really bad for him.”

I thought back to how I felt every time someone I thought was a friend ended up stabbing me in the back “Honestly, I would too. Villain or not, betrayal still sucks.”

“Exactly! And to make matters worse, I found him living on the streets later! He’s a wanted criminal in the Hidden City and had nowhere to go in New York. So obviously, I set him up with a nice, top tier home and helped him adjust to humanity. My brothers doubted us a lot but he’s doing great now. He even has his own job as a lunch aid!”

His bubbly smile dropped as he looked off to the distance. Up until now, Mikey’s been pretty animated when he talks, using his hands and sometimes whole body to enhance his speech. Right now though, he was still. Very still.

“But back then, sometimes even I thought I was crazy. I was trying to change a guy who’s fear-response was genocide, that’s not an easy thing to do. So many failed attempts at getting him to like humans, so many failed attempts of him trying to throw kids when they got on his nerves. Don’t get me wrong, it’s more than worth it in the end but when you’re actually doing it? It’s so exhausting.”

Exhausting. I never realized how fitting that word sounded until he said it. Exhausting.

“That sounds like a literal nightmare. Especially without any external support…” Oh god this was hitting too close to home. Abort! Abort!

“Wanna know what kept me going?”

“Yeah?”

He turned towards me. His blue eyes were illuminated by the sun. Actually, there were some new spots on his body that were glowing, too?

“Draxum made us. He was family to me. It wouldn’t be right to just abandon him.”

Oh.

He turned back to look at the sky. “I know you care about Zane and I can empathize with that so I’ll say this as nicely as I can… ZANE IS A WHINY PIECE OF SHIT.”

I forgot how loud Mikey screams oh god.

“He’s clingy, he’s rude, he called me a druggie for choosing to meet up in an alley, I mean what’s wrong with either?!”

“Micheal my ears, please.”

He took a deep breath and by the grace of heaven itself he calmed down.

“Look, I don’t know if you can help Zane the same way I helped Draxum. Some people don’t want to be changed, that was my biggest fear with Drax. But that’s not my point.” He put a soft hand on my shoulder, the tone of his voice sounded different. “What I’m saying is, I get it.”

My throat felt itchy. I hadn’t heard words like that in years. Having someone say they understand me, not being judged or getting weird looks for feeling the way I do. And I can’t even help believing him, after everything he’s told me it sounds like he meant it. I don’t really know how I feel right now. But then again, maybe I don’t have to know.

We stayed in comfortable silence listening to the city below.

There weren’t too many people out right now, everyone who had been outside enjoying the nice weather before were returning home from shopping or leaving cafés. Not many cars on the street, either. All in all, a nice and peaceful day.

Until, of course, it wasn’t.

A giant pink food truck with a weird stake on the top raced by definitively over the speed limit. Another large vehicle following it. It was green with a disk on the back, it kinda looked like a shell? Or maybe I’ve been talking with turtles too often-

“The Turtle Tank?”

“YOU GUYS HAVE A TURTLE TANK?!” Oh my stars! They just keep getting cooler every day I see them!

“And Meatsweat’s truck!”

“Oh, it’s Mr. Oinkerton.”

In the distance we could hear a familiar angry voice screaming vulgar words at the pig mobile through an oversized megaphone. How’d Donnie even get in this situation?

“So like…should we check in on him?”

“Nah, Dee’s probably fine.”

“Okay fair, but he’s partaking in chaotic activities without us.”

“...You know what, I like the way you think! Come on!” He rolled up his sleeve revealing a black band on his wrist and excitedly spoke to it as we both started running to catch up with the trucks.

“Hey Dontron! Why’re you on a chase with Meatsweats?”

“Mikey? You can see me? Are you in proximity?”

“Yeah! We can see you from the rooftops. I’ll wave!”

“Ugh, good I could use the help, Meatsweats upgraded his stupid truck so now it’s too fast to keep up with! Listen, he kidnapped some guy off the street and I don’t know what he’s gonna do so if you could assist-”

“On it, Dee!”

Seeing Mikey speed through the roofs was astounding! He bounced from building to building, doing flips and spins whenever he could. He looked so graceful while doing it, too. Kind of reminds me of ballerinas. Compared to him I was a heaving mess in the back. I’m faster than I was before, that’s for sure, but still had a really hard time keeping up with him. I’m starting to think Leo went easy on me…

But compared to the car chase down below, even Mikey could barely keep up.

“Man, Donnie wasn’t kidding when he said the truck got upgrades. Meatsweats was never this fast before.”

“Mikey, how long are we just gonna tail them? We’re not really getting anywhere like this.”

“Well we can’t run fast enough…” he looked at Meatsweat’s trying to fight Donnie off, leaving the back door to his truck wide open. His eyes lit up “But we can fly fast enough! I’ll swing you!”

Donnie’s voice returned to the comms “Mikey where are you? Could really use that help right now!” Meatsweats was starting to close the door.

Seeing this in my excited adrenalined nature, I rushed to approve the plan. “Okay, let’s do it!”

One of his nunchucks wrapped around me and my legs left the ground. I cut through the air getting flung right into the truck, somehow not breaking any bones after crashing in. Probably should have thought about that before.

I looked out and met Donnie’s panicked glare. “SALENA?!”

“Hi Donnie!” The door shut and my attention turned toward Meatsweats and a terrified boy with a bag covering his head in the corner.

“Who the hell are- oi, you’re the annoying lass from before, aren’t you?” Oh damn, he remembers me. “What’s with you and ruining my dinner plans?”

“Wait, dinner plans? You’re gonna eat him!?”

He looked so unbelievably offended at that, because of course it was such a stretch to come to that conclusion “What are you, stupid? I was a human before getting mutated. I was a world renowned chef, Rupert Swaggart!”

“Your name was Rupert? Ew.”

“SOMEONE PLEASE HELP ME!” Oh right, this is a hostage situation.

“Sorry, sorry, distractions. So what you’re saying is, you’re not gonna eat him?”

“No, of course not, human meat is an atrocious flavor.” That’s a relief! “However, they make a lovely meal for mutant livestock. And now I can feed twice the amount.” Oh.

He charged at me with his enormous tenderizer and I quickly got up and prepared my body for the attacks.

Go left! Now right! Right again! DUCK! He’s so swift with his strikes it’s almost too much for me to handle. I tried looking for any openings out but it was useless! All the doors are locked and he’s blocking the switch.

“How come he gets tied up but I have to be killed now?”

“Personal grudges.”

I got backed into a corner and narrowly avoided a butcher knife thrown straight at my head. Whatever greater force is keeping me safe, I owe you my life.

Wait! He threw a knife!

Genius struck me as I pulled the blade out from the wall. I charged at him, getting all my energy ready for the blow. Meatsweats chuckled.

“Aww, you really think you can fight back with a tiny cleaver?”

“Not quite.”

Instead of the slice the idiot pig prepared for, I planted my foot firm on the ground and swung the sharp blade to the left, smashing right through the window.

“What the-”

Perfect! Now to take care of the swine.

I darted around the room taunting him, now being the one to control where he’d strike. My heart was beating at the speed of sound, legs quick and light. My reflexes took over completely. It’s crazy to say this but I feel like I’m really in my zone!

Once I annoyed him enough to turn his blows even more aggressive than before, I ran right behind him, clinging on to his back. He took the bait and smashed down. The metal hammer hit him smack dab on the head as I dodged away, knocking him out.

Cutting my celebrations short, I rushed over to the boy and helped him up. He flinched at my touch, the bag still blinding his sight.

“What’s happening?!”

“Your rescue, that’s what. Now, come on!”

I helped him avoid the loose shards on the bottom while getting his body out the window. I stuck my head out and yelled for Donnie, who was still right behind us relieved to see me in one piece.

“Donnie I’m throwing him out the window, tell me when Mikey’s ready!”

“I THOUGHT YOU SAID YOU WERE RESCUING ME!”

After getting the thumbs up from Donnie, I pushed the boy out to the streets and sure enough, Mikey’s chains caught him and pulled him up to wherever he was on the roofs.

I heard a grunt behind me. Meatsweats was awake already? God I can’t believe I was scared I actually hurt him.

I scampered up to the roof of the truck. Unfortunately got jumpscared as the vent flung open and Meatsweats tried going through it. My bad for wanting to catch my breath, I guess.

“Salena jump!”

I took his suggestion and ran forward, avoiding the grimy mutant pig, and leaped over to the tank. A hole opened up and allowed me inside with Donnie looking back, setting the tank to autopilot and checking me for any serious injuries.

“So which one of you dum-dums thought it was a brilliant plan to send the untrained non-mutant human into the murderous chef’s vehicle?”

“Oh, was that bad?” Well, at least it’s over now.

Mikey’s voice came through Donnie’s own hand wrap. His were larger than Mikey’s, covering his entire palm compared to Mikey’s wrist bands.

“Donnie! Is Salena okay?”

“Physically or mentally.”

“Yepperoni. I’m right here, Mikey.”

“Phew good! And uh, by any chance, are you guys still following

Meatsweats?”

“Uh, I’m about to stop the tank, why?”

He nervously laughed “So um, you know the person we just saved right? Apparently he had a really important USB with him and he thinks it fell out in the truck…”

“OH COME ON!”

And so the chase continues as we scrambled to find answers.

“Are we really going to keep tracking Meatsweats for a USB drive? Who even uses them anymore!”

“He sounds super panicked so it must be bad, Dee. What if it’s something dangerous?”

“He’s a teenager, Micheal, why would he have dangerous intel?”

“Aren’t you two teenagers?”

“We don’t count!”

“How do we even get it from Meatsweats’ truck?”

Donnie switched over to the control manual and got a bunch of missiles ready “That’s it! I’m going lethal!”

Mikey’s face appeared on the monitor “Donnie don’t! You could destroy the drive thingie.”

“But my moment…”

“Donnie!”

Red lights started blinking, warning about the tank’s declining gas.

“Fine but we’re running out of time, what else can we do?”

“Want me to jump back in?”

“Do you want to die?”

“Sometimes.” They stared at me wide-eyed as I had the dawning realization “Oh wait that was rhetorical, wasn’t it?”

I forced my three brain cells to try and be useful.

C’mon, brain. Think, Salena! Think!

I saw the cleaver I still had in my hands and got an idea.

Bingo!

“Donnie! Drive to his right!”

“What? Um okay. Wait, where are you going!?”

I climbed back out the hole on the top. “When I count to three, stop the Turtle Tank.”

“CAN ANYONE COMMUNICATE THEIR PLANS WITH ME BEFORE IMPULSIVELY JUMPING IN?”

I threw my hair back letting the rushing keep it out of the way.

“Ready Donnie?”

“No.”

I aimed the cleaver for the front right tire and began counting “One…”

Pulled my arm back, getting ready to throw “Two…”

I took a deep breath. Arms don’t fail me now. I swung forward and felt the handle leave my grasp.

“Three!”

The tank jolted to a stop, knocking me forward. Donnie came out and helped me to my feet.

“You good?”

“Well, I’m alive so.”

We looked up and saw the blade successfully puncture the tire, sending the truck skidding to a crash at a light pole.

“Great Galileo, you actually did it. I’ll confess, I’m impressed!” Is this what validation feels like?

The round tangerine joined us not too long after with the boy strapped to his back and came running towards me.

“Salena, you were amazing!” Validation and a hug on the same day? Have I been blessed?

“Hey can someone get this thing off my head now?”

I looked at the boy, then at the horrific scenery behind him. “Uh…maybe we should get to a less chaotic place first.”

Mikey handed me the USB he found in Meatsweats’ truck. ”Sorry our day got interrupted Salena. You can always come back after helping him!”

I was about to agree but felt a buzz on my skirt pocket. I took out my phone and saw a pestering text from my aunt as well as the time being 5:00pm.

“I would but, I should probably get home anyway. You guys okay with um…all that?” I pointed to the passed out pig in his broken down truck.

Donnie pat my head with one of his extra robot arms “No probbles, we’ll take care of it. You’ve helped enough.”

I guess he’s always been nice-ish to me but still didn’t expect affection from him.

I saw him and Mikey chatting while cleaning up the mess, Mikey beaming as Donnie ruffled what would’ve been his hair if he had any. I smiled. Maybe I just never looked close enough at Donnie. Seems like he’s always been this way.

I lead the boy away from the mutant havoc and into a more public area before taking the bag off his head.

“Are you okay?”

He blinked and I studied his features a bit more. Dark eyes, short black hair, and round glasses. “Yeah I-I think. Thanks for saving me.”

I handed him his pen drive and after a few more thank-yous, he left. As promised, gave Zane a call. He didn’t pick up though. I shrugged it off and started walking back home. What a day today has been!

—

Next Chapter

#rise of the tmnt #save rottmnt #unpause rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt #rise of the turtles #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt season 3 #nickelodeon #rottmnt fanfiction #rottmnt x oc #rottmnt oc #oc x canon #rottmnt s3 #rottmnt mikey #mikey hamato #rise mikey #rottmnt moths fly in packs

[uroboros-if]

You don't have to answer this. But bouncing off the gift ask:

Do gods typically gift each other? And regardless, would the ROs, or any gods, feel about an MC gifting them things they know the ROs like? Either secretly, pretending to be a human offering, or outright giving them things.

Ugh, Tumblr totally ate my ask!

Do gods gift each other?

Gods don’t typically hold on to material things, so they infrequently give each other gifts; when they do, it’s something that’s intrinsic and deeply meaningful to them, like the flower Edvige, goddess of harvest and earth, created specifically to propose to her now-wife! Most mortals use the same flower now for their proposals.

However, even if it was something trivial, they’d most likely be extremely flattered. It’s likely a gift of thought, as they have no obligations; it’s given voluntarily, and thus it is special.

The act of giving between gods, then, is akin to a mortal offering something to the gods as an act of devotion. It’s like saying, “I worship you,” and that’s like saying, “I love you,” for deities.

Read below for god ROs’ reactions to being given a gift secretly/pretending to be a human offering + outright!

Secret Presents/Pretending to be a human offering

Salvatore loves showing people the gifts they get from mortals! They especially like to go through them with MC, unless the MC felt bad about looking at them. They’ll most likely proudly show MC the very special gift they made them, not knowing it was from MC.

Luciel would be surprised to receive a gift, and so thoughtful of them. They’d have a private smile and treasure it dearly. They have a great memory for someone who’s lived very long, and they catalogue yours among one of the most meaningful to them.

Ciocana would be shocked. They haven’t received a gift since... actually, they don’t remember the last time they were given a mortal gift! Firstly, they’d parade around with it, making sure their siblings specifically saw it (they’d probably accuse them of faking it). Even if no one asked, they’ll probably go, “Oh, this? Yeah, actually, this is a gift...” and inside, they truly are very happy about it!

I didn’t include Alessi in here because they’re not a god, so I’ll make that up by writing extra for them!

Receiving a gift outright

Salvatore would be shocked still, before they go absolutely crazy. You got them a gift! They jump up and down and rush in to hug you if you permit it. Profuse thanks are in order, and they keep it somewhere safe.

Luciel’s eyes widen a fraction, their lips parting slightly. It’s kept like that for a few long seconds as they take the gift from you. They then murmur a thank you softly, clasping the gift reverently. Would keep it safe as well.

Ciocana would be speechless for one rare moment. You’ve never seen them flustered before, but you think they are now, almost stumbling to get words out and play it off. They definitely try to act casual about it, but it fails spectacularly. Still, thanks, I guess! (and they cherish it with their life)

Alessi would gasp, taking the gift from you. It’s profound in so many ways—they’re not used to having things, and so the act of gift-giving is also special to them. It’s a sign of a true bond; they’d likely cry when you give it to them.

It’s also profound because they know you’re a god. Sure, they may not like them in general, but they’re not foolish about how incredibly influential and... just above all trivial matters they are! Humans give gifts to the gods, not the other way around. It feels like MC has shed their status of deityhood for a moment.

Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU for such a sweet ask! <3

#uroboros-if #uroboros #character asks #asks #thewanderingsnails #all ros #salvatore #luciel #ciocana #alessi #gifts #giving gifts

[eyelessfog]

Protector

Created 4 funzies after seeing this art by @sunnysmc !!!

A bit of information that might help you understand the story: Takes place in hermitcraft, but is talking about empires. Cut-off servers are servers that completely cut off memories of outside servers [which i hc to exist alongside what USUALLY happens between servers, which is that the memories stay, but the emotions and thought process isn’t there.]

---

Pearl didn’t visit often.

Or, at least, when she did, False wasn’t awake or at home.

They’d pass each other a... reasonable amount! As reasonable as you can get, when False was really busy with her builds, and was generally trying to do her own thing in the mountains, while Pearl was also building her own things, but also keeping a shop that was significantly more hands on than anyone else’s. They’d wave in the shopping district, sometimes.

That was mostly it.

But, anyway, the point was, Pearl didn’t visit often.

So, when she swooped in on elytra that had feathers instead of the flat bug-like shape that elytra usually had, False just assumed that she had missed something. Something big. It happens sometimes, when you hang out in the mountains and don’t pay attention to whatever was going on in everyone else’s bases.

“Hi, Pearl!” False said, waving.

Pearl made a slow loop over her head, then dropped, wings flying open to slow her fall just as she was to touch the floor.

Elytra didn’t do that.

What?

Pearl looked mellow, which was weird, because she was usually a little bit more bouncy than this, and also a little more slouched shoulders, tilted head, a silly grin, and hands always ready to grab something, if they weren’t full already.

Now, she was stood straight, shoulders squared, lips pressed into a line, and for the half second after Pearl’s smooth landing, False watched her hands fumble for a place by the end of her shorts, before pausing and clasping together delicately. Hm. False sometimes forgot that Pearl could have a bit of height on her when she was standing straight.

“Um,” False said, because she was feeling a little bit like Pearl was about to be the barer of bad news, and False didn’t particularly like bad news, so-

“Hello, False.”

Okay! Okay. Alright! Pearl was sounding super solemn, which was fine, and definitely didn’t mean that False was getting kicked off the server or something- well, actually, that specific worry was a little stupid, since Xisuma would come tell her whatever he wanted to tell her all on his own. And probably give her some time to prepare for what he wanted to say after sending her a private message. So. The whole worrying thing would need to find some other reason.

“What, uh, what brings you here?” False asked, slowly hooking her pickaxe to her belt and slipping her deepslate into her pockets. This whole thing was feeling very formal, and there was nothing less formal than holding onto your building blocks and a pickaxe! Probably.

“Well,” Pearl said, offering an amused smile. “I’d like to say that I shouldn’t need a reason to see a friend, but, well. I need a favour, so I’d be a bit of a hypocrite.”

“Oh, well, I’d be happy to help!”

“You haven’t even heard what I’m asking of you.” 

“This is- this is true, yes. Um. What’s up?” False asked. Pearl wasn’t moving around as they talked, which was making False not want to move while they talked, out of some sort of politeness, even though False was actually getting a little jittery! She’d never felt so off put by a conversation. It really did suck.

“You know the other server I’ve been on? The cutoff one.” Pearl tilted her head, and False ran through servers she knew the others were in.

“Um, what was it- That last life thing? That was a cutoff series, wasn’t it? Ah, but that one’s over.”

“Ah, well, last life wasn’t cutoff actually, just dulled the memories a little more. No, I meant Empires.”

False snapped her fingers at the name, nodding. “Right, right! I remember that! Yes, Empires. Did something happen?”

“Well, they’re starting it up again, I noticed,” Pearl said, and looked away, almost guiltily. Um?

“That’s cool! Fwhip sent an invite?” False asked, then grimaced as Pearl’s face turned even guiltier.

“Not quite. I think I’ve been... prematurely let in. In spectator mode.” She touched a hand to her lips, pondering, then sighed. “Okay, hold on, I was going to just ask you the favour, but I think this needs context.”

Okay. Context. Alright. False would love some of that!

“So, I’m not too sure Fwhip is quite aware of my being on the server yet. Because, the thing is, I declined his invite to the planning of the second season.” False’s brows rose, because that was not at all how this sort of thing worked. “I’ve been on the server, and it’s all those fun pre-roleplay server things - People living out their stories before we come and take over, and I’ve seen everyone, and they’re... They’re not doing great, False. I only met one personally, and it was Joel, and he’s...” Whatever had come over her to make her seem so serious just dropped. Her shoulders fell, and she pressed a hand over her mouth, brows furrowing.

“Is he-?” False didn’t know what she was asking. Was he hurt? Mean? Something else that she couldn’t put words to?

“He’s- he’s fine. He- I won’t say that there’s nothing wrong with him, it’s just- the last time I saw him was a thousand years ago.” Pearl thought for a moment. “Longer.”

“Pardon?” False asked.

“I haven’t been logging into the server. I’ve been dreaming it.” Pearl locked eyes with False, and she looked desperate. “I’ve been living hundreds of years every time I go to sleep, and then coming back to here. I’ve been a God for hundreds of years, and when I come back, I’m mortal, and I’m corrupted by an alien.” 

“You’re a God?” False asked, eyes wide. Then the rest of the sentence translated in her mind, and: “You’re corrupted by an alien?”

“I’m a God there, yes.” Pearl brushed off the second question easily. “The Mother of Sunflowers, to some. The God of farming, mostly. The God of the sun itself, sometimes. And I’m... For the past little while, I haven’t been with the other Gods. Or, well-” she chuckled. “The others are, as far as I’ve seen, dead. And I just live on an island that isn’t even in the world, but close enough that I can watch.”

“I don’t- Pearl, um, how am I supposed to help you with this?” False scratched at her forehead with a knuckle, then crossed her arms.

“I wanted to ask you if you could be part of Empires.” Pearl stepped closer, and False recognized the twitch of her fingers as pulling back the instinct to grab her hands. “I’ll send you in myself, you don’t need to ask Fwhip for an invite.”

“Can you do that?” False asked, instead of saying no, because she was feeling a little bit like she was going to say yes.

“A God, False.” She smiled, opened her hands and made the dramatic choice of pulling a glowstone out of her inventory. It popped into existence in her hand, and disappeared as she curled her hand back closed. “He didn’t give me admin powers, but, well, I have them.”

“Okay, okay, but, uh- why me?” That was the one thing that False wasn’t getting. Pearl wanting outside help - well, False could understand that. But, well, Pearl was in that- that- what. The soup batch? Or something? Gem was part of Empires already, so it would be assumed that it would maybe be nice to have the third member be there with them?

“False, you’re known as a PvP queen.” It was a statement, not a question, and False tucked her head bashfully.

“Well, yes, I’m pretty good. A little rusty, now, but-”

“False,” Pearl said, a little fond, a little tired. “I think- I think you could protect them, False.”

“You think I could- I mean, maybe, but I don’t-” False paused. Thought it over. Thought it over again. “You think that there’s something I should fight for them?”

“I think they’ll need protection. Our world was a dangerous place, and it hasn’t stopped being dangerous. There are other reasons, now, but I think...” Pearl sighed. “False, I just want to know if you’d be willing to join the server. To protect them.”

“To protect them? I- um, sure. Yes. Yeah.” False nodded. “Yeah. I can do that.”

“Okay.” Pearl paused. “Alright. Thank you.” 

They stared at each other for a long moment, before Pearl’s eyes turned to False’s base. “Your base is very pretty.”

“Thank you!”

Another awkward pause, and then Pearl backed away. “Right, well. I’ll call you when I need you.”

Her elytra (which still did not look like elytra) unfolded from her back, and False just watched as she took off in a burst of wind. She went up, up, up, then began gliding back down to the shopping district.

False flexed her fingers absently. Protecting. She could do that. Yeah, yeah, she could protect.

God. She was going to be on a cut-off server.

#[lore texts] #[written in stone] #hermitcraft #empires smp #falsesymmetry #pearlescentmoon #meow. i need to be in bed 20 minutes ago to be honest

[thisdreamplace]

Hi dream. 😵‍💫 anon here. I want to respond to your last response. I don’t believe that being anxious stops us from being in a state of what we want either. Sometimes people throw so many random conditions around. Even if we have anxiety and cry, that doesn’t mean we aren’t on the path or in the state. The state won’t feel like forcing ourselves not to be a certain way. If we’re anxious, we’re anxious. I have it in my mind that everything will be okay despite the negative emotions or reactions. I appreciate you being so open here. I hate that you were feeling that way and I hope you are feeling more at ease now. Sending a virtual hug. 🫂 Also the movie you talked about, What Dreams May Come, is now on my watch list. I’m going to watch it tonight, actually. Thank you for the recommendation.

I had such a real conversation with myself yesterday. I asked “what is being myself?” I have never known. I’ve always wanted to be like or be someone else. I’ve always tried so hard to be liked that I never once just went with the flow of being me. I only lived for the validation & views of others, even with my looks. My looks were the only reason people even gave me attention. So I let that fuel my high school life. Everything I did or looked like was for other peoples’ validation. Soon, peoples’ compliments didn’t feed my ego anymore. I was left with how I truly felt about myself. Bad. I let that feeling settle and I’ve never been the same. My whole being changed when I had to depend on myself for my own happiness. I felt ugly and so did the world. Eventually, even my friend called me ugly. No one genuinely liked me as an entire person, just my face. I’ve been in a downward spiral ever-since. I haven’t known how to pick myself up. Of course I have matured since then, I just turned 20, but I still see how living by people’s validation has gotten me to this negative point. I’ve been afraid to be me (even with the things I like to do) because of my dependency on others’ views.

I remember you speaking about not avoiding yourself. I know it seems like I had such a negative revelation but I’m joyful about it. My problem with everything and even manifesting is that I keep seeking that validation from others. I noticed that even my desires were linked to, “if I get this, then people will think this” But why haven’t I prioritized how I felt? Don’t I want to change my life for me? I’m still learning. I’m still growing, but I hope to live for me now.

I wish everyone could see your blog. So they’d know that their journey is okay. There is a future waiting with possibilities. And there is a now that we are meant to enjoy and make the best of. 😊 I would have never thought like this before, but you have opened my mind, Dream! 💕 Now, I’m going to watch What Dreams May Come and begin the journey of being me. I’m excited to see who I will become everyday of my life.

P.S. I hope your day went well today. I’m sending you peace & love.

hiiii 😵‍💫anon <3

"the state won't feel like forcing ourselves to be a certain way" right... and it just doesn't make sense really. when we feel down, our entire world doesnt disappear. we still have those things that feel natural to have hahah, despite the mood we are in. and i'm feeling much better 🥰 thank you. these days, honestly, i really just invite it all in. no matter what...i really just... choose freedom over holding onto anything painful. thank you for the virtual hug.

i'm so glad you brought that up and are figuring that out for yourself. i think that these days, thats the question everyone asks: "who do i wanna be" and not so much, "who am i, really ?" and i have found that.. i've gotten a lot further asking the second question than the first. because if everything is already perfect and aligned within myself... i don't need to be anything else or try to be some ideal. i just need to allow my true self to shine through. i'm glad you were able to reflect that much, because through that you'll know how to move forward. you know what stories you used to believe about yourself and now you don't have to keep believing in them. not that it'll be easy, but you have found a guide within yourself of what to let go of in order to move forward. and that's always wonderful.

i think that even a negative revelation is a freeing one. because now you won't be as much of a prisoner to it, you can't possibly change something you aren't even aware of it. even though it's painful, it's also... exciting. :) i really get it. living for yourself is really the way. i reread an article from a few years ago yesterday, and it was just a reminder of that. in all of this... there's really no one to worry about but you. you know, we don't get a prize/more love for our suffering. so why keep engaging in it ? i'm glad that you're doing all of this for yourself now. keep moving forward and always remember that the healing isn't linear... it'll be okay to feel like things are more hard sometimes. just never forget that you can return to yourself always.

thank you so much for your kind words 🥹 it really means a lot to be because... that's really what i wanted in having this blog. to share my own journey and through that, emphasizing that it's okay not to be okay. there's a light... and it's our own selves, if we allow it. i've been the light in my own darkness, and i want everyone to know the same is true for them. i'm glad you know it now too. :) and i'm so excited for you !!

please let me know what you think of the movie ! i just rewatched it today, and it was just as lovely, honestly better now that i've grown since the last time i saw it. and also, i just love the visuals of the movie. so beautiful !

also thank you, my days have been really lovely. there's just so much love everywhere and i'm just allowing myself to take it all in. it's really nice hehe ❣️

[lxvenderdreamy]

hiiii!! i just got back from camping lol and was wondering if you could do a 🍓 about soul and DtK asking M!Reader (and eachother) out on a date? like the 3 of them going out?

i’m so sorry that I haven’t been updating, i’m just trying to enjoy the summer while I have it and I haven’t been that all motivated, so I’m very sorry about that. I try to write but I just lose motivation. But i’ll try to start writing more like how I usually do!

Soul and Kid would start to have this feeling…this feeling involved in the last “date” that the three of you had. They actually wanted to go on an actual date with you, really bad.

You also followed through with this feeling as well, you can’t help but actually want to experience an actual date with Soul and Kid, but would that make you three a couple? Yes, it would. But you won’t mind, of course Kid and Soul won’t mind either.

Soul and Kid had already had asked out one another for this date and they both seemed pleased. Of course the relationship isn’t to its fullest without you, so they are gonna ask you out as well.

They decided to do it together instead of individually, so they got prepared and started to make way to you.

They both asked you out and you couldn’t help but flush red. It made your heart flutter and you felt excited about this date, an actual date with Soul and Kid.

You said yes and you all shared your opinions about the timing and where would the date be at. Thank goodness it was a Friday, so nothing is stopping you three.

Just like the last “date”, you went home and immediately got ready. You made sure that everything was nice yourself, you have to be appealing for this very loving date.

Instead of Soul picking you up, Kid did, Soul was also there too. (I imagine Kid has a limo and some guy is driving it lolol) You three sat in the back, chatting about this date.

When you all finally arrive, you three get out of the car and you get your seats, the date is calming and sweet, some slow music playing on the mist of the beauty of it all. You feel happy, your smile never dropped not one second because this really was an amazing date, it was nice and loving for you, it actually felt nice to go and have a literal date other than the last one.

Soul and Kid felt the same way, they really preferred going on an actual date with you other than just disguising it. Just seeing you smile and have a good time is what makes them happy as well.

There were some funny moments like how you guys kept flirting with one another or Soul just ordering the most plainest thing on the menu. Even when Kid was silently crying mentally when his wallet is empty it was still so funny.

After the date is all set and done, you thank them with a smile and a small blush on your cheeks before going back inside your house.

Soul and Kid had a little something up their sleeve, that being them giving you a small loving kiss before you left. It made you flustered as you just waved then off so flustered as you sped walked into your house and shutting the door. It as funny to see your reaction.

You three will always remember that beautiful night, it was amazing. It made you three happy. You would definitely love to go out more with them and they would too.

I am very sorry if this is short, like I said in the beginning I haven’t really been that motivated on either of my Quotev, Ao3, or even my wattpad. So I apologize for my lack of motivation throughout this summer, i’ll try to get back on track and put some more work out there for you guys because I really love you all, you all mean the world to me so it’s my honor to keep writing and updating you guys to make you all very happy❤️❤️❤️

#fluff #oneshot #soul eater dtk #soul eater soul #liz soul eater #soul eater patty #soul eater oneshot #soul eater x reader #[🍓]

[jonquilyst]

15 OC Questions (Megyn)

I was tagged by @akitasimblr 💜💜

1. Are you named after anyone? No.

2. When was the last time you cried? When I lost my job at the bar. That was a really hard day for me. I’m not sure what happened, but when Trevor asked me why I lied about being underage, I just couldn’t keep it in anymore… I felt so defeated and I didn’t know what to do. I felt like I was in a lot of trouble and that something horrible was gonna happen to me. I was so surprised when Trevor decided to help me instead of punish me for what I did.

3. Do you have kids? No. I’m still too young for kids. I’m not sure if I’d like any, either.

4. Do you use sarcasm? Not really. I’m bad at using sarcasm. Every time I try people get confused or take it literally, so I don’t think it’s my style.

5. What's the first thing you notice about people? Their attitude. I’ve learned that how someone behaves when you first meet them says a lot about them and their personality.

6. What's your eye color? Blue.

7. Scary movies or happy endings? Definitely happy endings. I don’t like getting scared; I just don’t get that “thrill” like some people do. I’d rather feel warm and fuzzy inside after a wholesome movie instead.

8. Any special talents? People tell me I’m really good at singing. I never really thought I was any good until I went to the karaoke bar with Eva and her friends. I remember seeing their faces change when I started singing. It amazed me. I never thought I would be able to impress anyone like that.

9. Where were you born? I think it was downtown Newcrest, if I remember right. I’ve lived in so many places that it’s hard to remember.

10. What are your hobbies? I listen to music, mostly. I don’t really have productive hobbies. Lately I’ve also been watching videos on my phone now that I actually have one, but I’m not sure if that counts.

11. Have you any pets? No. I’ve never had any pets, actually. I think having one would be really nice, but I’m not sure what kind of pet I’d want to have.

12. What sports do you play/have played? I’ve never been in sports.

13. How tall are you? 5’5” (165 cm). I think I’m somewhere in the middle. Not tall or short.

14. Favorite subject in school? I didn’t really have one since school was such a struggle for me growing up. I’d say lunch time, since I was able to eat and food wasn’t always there at home, but I know that doesn’t count.

15. Dream job? I’m not sure. I haven’t really thought of what kind of job I would like to have too much, since I’m focused on just making it in the world right now, but after receiving so much help from the people around me, I’ve been thinking maybe I would like a job that helps others.

Tagging @windslar and @love-trait (but feel free to ignore)

#tags #txt #Megyn Rodham

[stevenose]

hi! just wanted to pop in and say i really look up to you as a writer and i love all your work (your camboy!steve au is actually my favorite thing ever) :) and i wanted to thank you so much for giving us your work and time :)

ai used to write a lot and i dont really do it anymore but ive been considering starting again! i wanted to know if you had any advice or tips on starting out on tumblr?

you are so nice 😭 thank you for liking my work and being here!!!

you absolutely should start writing again!! my advice is pretty simple:

1. do not under ANY!!!!!! circumstances compare your work to another writer’s work. EVER. it is truly not worth it. your mental health will make you hate writing and baby you don’t deserve to go thru that! just because your writing is different from someone’s doesn’t make it bad. you can admire another writers work but please remember yours is just as valuable.

2. write what YOU want to write. you will burn yourself out otherwise. requests are fun and i love doing them but my last blog - omg. i got so overwhelmed with requests for things i felt i HAD to write to make people happy and it made me stop writing for over a year. so if you do open requests just remember you’re not evil for not fulfilling ones that don’t speak to you!

3. ^ along with that, write whatever the hell you wanna write ok. i think the fandom is in a very transformative period rn. our renaissance if u will. we just be writing whatever the fuck. if i can write flayed steve you can write whatever u want ok baby. u wanna write that monsters inc AU with steve and dustin as sully and mike then go for it ok

4. the more u write the better you will get. you will undeniably look back on things you’re writing rn a year from now and see growth. just keep writing even if it feels weird at first!

5. i haven’t rly gotten hate mail on THIS blog but i have on my main. the number one thing to do in that situation is just delete it. 10 out of 10 times people are literally just jelly that ur pussy tight ok. it doesn’t matter. a strangers opinion of you on the internet does not matter. i GUARANTEE you that. so if you get a message or someone being like “lol ur writing SUCK” just delete it and don’t listen to it. trust me on this one

and just some tips:

1. write ur things on google docs or the notes app for the love of god. tumblr will randomly refresh when ur 3k into a fic and u will want to die. ask me how i know

2. cross posting to ao3 is helpful for getting ur works recognized but it’s not a necessity at all

3. the tagging system on this cursed website is really bad and fucked up and crazy. if you want ur post to be in the tags (gets it visibility = gets u some followers), you should tag the most important things first. i.e you write smut for steve. tag as steve harrington smut FIRST. we all love to ramble in the tags but from experience if you put a personal tag on a fic first in line, it has less of a chance getting published into the character tag. it’s insane

4. make friends!!! we all just want to write on here. reach out to your mutuals and bounce ideas off of each other. it’s fun!!

5. RETURN THE SLAB OR SUFFER THE PHAROH’S CURSE

#stevenose posts #i hope this is somewhat helpful!!!???

[deadendsave]

Delilah Hodges’ Journal (3)

1: It’s been a year. I still haven’t been able to contact my parents. I eventually gave up and accepted the fact that they’re probably never coming back for me. I really hope they’re still alive. If I knew they were, I’d be relieved. But I don’t think I could ever forgive them for leaving me for so long. I’m trying to not resent them, but it’s hard.

2: 18th birthday. I made it to adulthood. I remember I used to get so excited about birthdays, now it’s hard to get through them. It’s not fair that I get to keep growing older, and Quinn’s always gonna be 15. I know she wouldn’t want me feeling this way, but I can’t help it. I’m tired of being guilty for having these feelings. I’m guilty because I feel like I should be happier. I don’t know why I do this to myself.

3: Quinn, my old camp, my parents, the bar looters. It’s all changed me so much. I miss being happy. I try to pretend to be in front of Todd and Linda. I don’t wanna seem ungrateful for everything they do for me. I slip up sometimes though, Linda notices the most. I always tell her I’m fine, I’m just tired.

4: On a more positive note, a lot’s happened since I filled up my last journal. I’ve read so many books. Some were great, some were… not so great. Most of the “classics” are boring to me. There’s still a lot of reading to do, I’ve barely scratched the surface of all that the bookstore has to offer. I’ve also been (very slowly) improving my hunting skills. Still not great, but I’m getting there. I learned how to drive Todd’s truck. He won’t let me drive without him being in the passenger seat because he’s super protective over it.

5: Todd and Linda surprised me by cleaning out the apartment above the bookstore. I have my own space now! No more sleeping on the couch. It’s got water and electricity, it’s a little faulty though. The lights flicker a lot. But still! My own place! I’m gonna start decorating with all of the time times things I’ve collected.

6: Someone showed up at the bar this morning. For a minute, I thought it was my parents. Nope. Just some guy covered in blood. He said his name was Mitch. He’s not much older than me. He’s the youngest person I’ve come across since… never mind. So far he’s been nice, I don’t trust him though. I want to, but people pretend to be good all the time. What if he’s just pretending?

7: Great, he’s gonna be staying with us. I don’t think that’s a good idea. It would be wrong to just kick him out on the street, but still. He said he was alone. He could be lying. What if he has friends and they’re just waiting for their signal to barge in and attack us. I know Todd is watching him like a hawk but I’m still not comfortable. He could be just like those people that showed up last year.

8: Last year, a young couple came to the bar pretending they needed help. They actually just wanted to take everything we had, including our home. What Todd had to do was terrible, but he didn’t have a choice. The man grabbed me and said he wanted to “keep me.” I felt so disgusted. We would’ve helped them with whatever they needed if they would’ve just asked. I’m scared Mitch is gonna be just like them.

9: I’ve been avoiding Mitch as much as possible this past week. I don’t want to come off as a bitch, I could be nicer. The old me would’ve been, but things change. Linda’s been trying to ask him all about his life, he says there’s nothing worth talking about. What is he hiding?

10: I’m not as good as keeping up with journaling anymore. Here’s an update though. Turns out, Mitch is actually pretty cool. I’m still hesitant to get too close, but he’s a nice friend to have around. I enjoy his company. He found an old guitar, he’s been playing songs for me. He’s not that bad. Plus, I’m realizing he’s kinda cute.

11: Mitch knocked on my door last night, said he couldn’t sleep. I let him in my apartment, and we sat and talked on the balcony all night. At first, it was just awkward small talk. Then he asked me why I had so many ocean-themed things. I told him all about my fascination with the ocean and marine life. I got a little embarrassed and apologized for nerding out and talking so much. He said it was cool though. I think he was just being nice.

12: Mitch came back over this morning, said he found a few things I might like while he was out hunting with Todd. He handed me a tiny lighthouse statue. I wanted to cry, it was just such a sweet gesture. It meant he was actually listening to me. He also handed me a box. Inside was a bracelet kit. That’s when I really had a hard time fighting back the tears. He said he figured I might want to make a new one since the one on my wrist was so old. I feel like that was Quinn’s way of letting me know it’s okay to let him in.

13: I said I’d only wear a new one if he made it and pinky promised me to always wear the one I make him. He laughed at first, but we sat down and made each other bracelets. I took the one Quinn made me off. Mitch was right, it was getting old. I didn’t want to end up breaking it or losing it. I’ll keep it somewhere safe.

14: I told him all about my parents and Quinn. It was hard to talk about them out loud. Mitch told me about his mom though. I can’t even imagine what it was like to have to do that to her. I could see the pain in his eyes as he was talking about it. He looked like he was reliving it. I didn’t know what to say so I just held his hand hoping it would help. I don’t know if it did though.

15: Mitch took me out during the day to practice my shooting skills. I kept getting frustrated, but he was really patient with me. When we were walking back home we saw something in the distance. I got freaked out. It looked like a person. When Mitch went to go investigate, there was nothing there.

16: Mitch surprised me with a turntable and some records there were in (almost) perfect condition, just a little dusty. He was so excited, he looked like he couldn’t wait to give them to me. We set up the turntable and put on some music. I made him dance with me. We both sucked, but we didn’t care. He leaned in and kissed me. I was nervous but it felt right. For the first time in what felt like forever, I felt content.

17: Before Mitch, i couldn’t really wrap my head around the whole love thing. It just seemed so complicated. But i get it now. It’s nothing like what I’ve read in books. It’s more simple than that but it’s real and it’s raw. It’s the warm, comforting feeling I get when I’m with him. It doesn’t have to be anything else. That’s enough for me.

dialogue note, delilah’s apartment:

Mitch: This scar makes me ugly.

Delilah: Hey, at least you’re still alive. Plus I think it makes you look kinda badass.

Mitch: Badass? I look like one of the sick.

Delilah: Well, I don’t think you do. And you’re not ugly! Not that looks really should matter that much anymore. I don’t know why we still care about things like that. It’s kind of silly when you think about it.

Mitch: Thanks, but I know you’re just saying that to make me feel better.

Delilah: I’m not! I think you’re beautiful. I really mean it.

Mitch: Oh, so you think… I’m beautiful? 😏

Delilah: Shut the fuck up! Don’t make me regret saying that.

#delilah #millhaven journals

[suchsaccharine]

330am and have no intention of trying to sleep at this point. I just need to keep this in the for front of my mind today while I’m working.

Keep in mind that once I leave for work, redo-sing is not an option.

My hs reunion is this weekend.

Gonna want to be rested for that.

For sure.

Actually in the past month (sober) I’ve made much much much more progress in my wl mission than in months prior. Sleeping is where it’s at.

But I had a moment of weakness and I gave in, and now I’ve got to see my decision through to the end.

The end.

-

I want to cut out random drvg sessions. Like randomly ordering ket, c0ke, speed, mdm@ once every other month. Like where would I be if I didn’t…where could I be if I don’t stay right where I’m at? I have a strong argument for the opposite side, but I do consider this.

I think I’m going to try it.

Cut out everything but my dabs and herb.

Might avoid the tempting redbull substitution this time bc that felt great at first, and then it didn’t.

I lay next to my baby while they sleep and I wish I could enjoy watching them sleep peacefully for so much longer. The sun will rise soon.. another day of being flooded with internal declarations of parental shortcomings and failures. I’ve not felt so genuinely ready to not be here since I had convinced myself I had contracted an incurable sti for like a full 6 months in the first half of 11th grade. But this time it’s not cause of inevitable aloneness, or even disliking raising my child, but that I can see almost nothing but mistakes every single day and I’m starting to believe and accept that I’m kind of not the greatest and that he may be happier in the short+long term if I just..went. I know that probably sounds crazy. And I don’t feel like a bad person or a mean person… but I feel like I could be doing better. And I am trying. Like everyday I consciously attempt to be better than the day before, or at least be very self aware of what I’m projecting.. and I still just feel like I’m failing this kid. I see them laugh and smile and joke and goof off but in my mind …. It’s like I’m so worried ab what could be having a last or traumatizing effect on them, that I truly cannot steer my thoughts in another direction. All day. And all night.

I remember feeling this genre of anxiety for the first time - the first night we were home from the hospital. I don’t think I slept at all. Between feedings I was just in shock. And that was over 8 yrs ago.

See, I wasn’t supposed to have them when I did. It was just a check up and their dad just left me 2 weeks prior and I was only 19 and it was over a month before the actual due date. When they put that baby in my chest, I never felt more lost and confused and helpless in my entire life. I felt bad that I wasn’t having that magical moment that you hear about. But I suspected, during my pregnancy, that I might not. Looking back I can see that I had detached myself from my surroundings and my self because my life had become very actively traumatic. It took me years to figure out that’s why I have and haven’t done a lot of the things I did…and didn’t. Maybe within the last 3 yrs I’ve really been trying to come to terms with everything in the past so I can be better from my child today, and tomorrow. But anyway…

Idk why I typed all that out as if I haven’t written about this in other journals. I guess it’s not the backstory I’m fixated on rn, it’s the current climate. I just can’t tell if they’re happy or not. They told me last night about a disturbing nightmare they’ve been having for about 3 months, which is almost how long my partner for 4yrs (-1.5) have been back together. My partner cares for tha kid a lot and is a good role model. But I feel he is sometimes too quick to be too stern. It’s disheartening. But, He will ensure my child has every opportunity for a successful future. And I’m deathly afraid I can’t provide that all by myself. What’s the lesser of two evils? And while my partner is stern, my child usually has an overall positive shift in behavior with them around. But sometimes I can just see where they are miscommunicating and honestly I am often a bit more ‘on the side’ of my kid because as I observe them together, I can basically see what my kid meant by what they said, why they phrased it how they did, why they are frustrated that you don’t seem to be on the same page. I see it play out across his expressive features clear as day.

I’m only one tiny person. I wish I had all the answers. I don’t. I just really really hope the decisions I make about him do not make him worse off than he would be otherwise. God I feel like shit for bringing him into my mess of a life.

#eedee #drvgs #i feel so guilty #trailer trash #better off without me #i’m sorry #cross to bear #selfish #teen parents #rice cake nation #failure #eedee tumblr #eedeetwt #stupid #trauma #giving birth

[nami-moittli]

Oh? It’s been so long since I’ve made that post that I’ve fallen out of my appmon phase, but I’m happy to fall back in for awhile to talk about him!

First off, like I said in the tags of the post this person commented on, my oc is more of a headcanon character of sorts, and I have included him in my appmon Gacha meme videos, so if you watch those, you might understand him, but you don’t have to.

Anyway, my oc/hc character is based off Yuujin, and (spoilers if you haven’t finished appmon) his backstory is basically that Hajime and Rei (though Rei does it begrudgingly, only because Hajime, Haru and Hackmon are telling him to) bring back Yuujin by grabbing the last latest version of Yuujin before YJ-14, so probably like, YJ-12 or something. And everyone’s happy bc Yuujin’s back and Haru & Ai are happy.

Though, of course, our revived version of Yuujin, is younger than Yuujin. And because model YJ-14 is stuck and dead in the dark web, they can’t get back those few years of memories back.

I imagine that in the hypothetical second season where revived!Yuujin exists, he would be suffering in the background from all the stress and inconsistencies that came from missing those years. I mean, he suddenly gained a whole new friend group, two of which (plus those not in the know, like Watson) would be a few years older than him. Also, not to mention all of the weird shit that went down during the appmon runtime, like, the appmon. And the fact that he’s an AI. And the fact he died. So, yeah.

I like to think that Yuu(our revived Yuujin) would be living with the Katsura’s, mainly because Rei still doesn’t fully trust him, and they(Rei, Hajime and Hackmon) need to be there in case Yuu’s old Leviathan code kicks back in, so, that’s fun (I will admit that I feel bad for Rei though, cause now he has to deal with being, basically the owner of a orphanage at this point)

And, anyways, after slowly showing the buildup of, everything, on Yuu’s back, he runs away.

Everyone immediately is worried (even Rei, bc by that point, while he might not admit it, Yuu grew on him) and starts looking for him.

They eventually find him, and that’s when Yuu tells them all (or at least, those who found him) that he feels, like he’s not even “Yuujin” anymore. Because, sure, he may look and act like Yuujin, but he doesn’t have those core memories that all his ‘friends’ keep bringing up. He doesn’t even remember meeting them! And it makes him feel, like he’s not “Yuujin.”

That’s when Yuu starts going by “Yuu” or, more specifically, Yuu Katsura (bc yes).

Everyone apologizes for making him feel that way and Yuu comes back. Only, a little different, as he’s now in an even younger body, so instead of being Astora’s age, he now looks like he’s Hajime’s.

Why? (Bc when I first came up with him he was Hajime’s age before I realized it didn’t make sense) bc he wanted to try and get a “fresh start” at being who he decided he wanted to be, and not “Yuujin”

Of course, his identity crisis isn’t over by that point, in fact it had only really just begun, and the rest of his story is Yuu trying to be comfortable in his own skin.

(And when he’s finally getting a hold of himself, Yuujin comes back-)

And yeah, that’s basically Yuu’s backstory. Sorry if that didn’t make much sense, or felt out of order. But yeah, that’s my appmon oc/hc character. I do have an actual appmon oc, being an oc who’s an appmon, and she’s Ai’s buddy! Though I still haven’t figured out her design just yet.

Anyways, hope y’all liked that. Just some rambling. Bye now, ig?

#appmon #digimon universe appli monsters #digimon oc #appmon oc #yuu katsura #headcanon #yuujin oozora #digimon original character

[substituted-shinigami]

Writing Update: March 2023

Hello everyone, and welcome back to “Writing Updates”. I’m going to try to do these once a month, but uh… we’ll see! 😅 (Anyone remember Bleach Free Mondays? I definitely didn’t forget about Bleach Free Mondays… 🥲)

Good news: I wrote an awful lot this month! ☺️ I put out a request for prompts, and I got two!!! (Thanks again! 🥰) And both fics turned out okay, although I think they need some more time in the oven before they go on AO3. However, I also do have a different AO3 fic ready to go for the end of the month, which is great! I had it written before, but I wanted to put it away so that I could look at it with fresh eyes, hence the prompt ask. That and while I really felt like writing, I didn’t like editing, and especially not editing FREAKING BLOODLINES (more on that later). I’m really happy that I’ve been able to keep up with my chapter a month goal so far, and I think taking breaks from my longer fic has really helped with that! 

Bad news: I haven’t done a lot of art recently… Although to be fair, part of the problem is that while I can do writing anywhere (at home, at doctor’s appointments, on the road, …when I’m in the ER…again 😅), I can only draw at home. Another problem is the editing process. Even when I think a writing piece is solid and completely done, if I think of something later I can just go back and edit it anytime (Heck, I just did it with the piece coming out later today!). But with art, once I ink and color it, that’s kind of it. It’s done. That wonky eye is just going to be a wonky eye. So maybe I just need to be more okay with that? Idk. Oh but, I do have a couple of things I do want to draw though!  So hopefully I’ll be able to finish those up and get them out. 

Semi-Good News? (Okay, let’s be honest, I’m just going to complain about Bloodlines): Sigh…  Bloodlines, the fic I originally had slotted for January and now it’s almost April. 😅 Last I checked on it, it seemed good. Heck, parts of it I even really liked! But it felt good in the “this is as far as I can take this right now” way, not in the “this is actually good” way. Plus I’ve been learning to put fics away and look at them again weeks later to get a fresh perspective. This is especially important as a new writer because since I have so much to learn, there's a high chance that something new is going to click like a week down the line. Which is sort of what happened??? Like the fic I’m posting later isn’t perfect and is a little weird, but I’ve always been very bad at “show, don’t tell” when it comes to writing, and I feel like this piece does it a little better than some of my others? So I’d like to incorporate some more of that into Bloodlines. It’s got a little, but not nearly enough. Honestly, with all the little changes I’ve been adding over time, I’m half tempted to hold on to it all the way till December and just post it as my big, “end of year/this is everything I’ve learned” piece. Unfortunately, I’m also very impatient, so we’ll see what happens! Plus sometimes holding onto something sometimes keeps me from moving on so…. Eh, I’ll figure it out eventually! 

Welp, this has gotten long. Thank you for reading! This month’s fic should be up later today. Like I said earlier, it’s a bit different, but I had fun writing it! See you all next month! 😁

#writing update #march 2023

[akwardlyuncool]

After Ever Happy (2022) - Movie Review

(Based on the novel series After by Anna Todd)

CW: Alcohol Addiction and Overdose.

Obligatory Disclaimer: Did not read the source material. Most reference to them is speculation or public knowledge.

Here were are again. Harden (Hero Fiennes Tiffin) and Tessa (Josephine Langford) have once again graced our straight to streaming/DVD screens with another look at their whirlwind of a toxic romance, for the 4th installment of the After series.

Wild revelations were dropped in the last movie (After We Fell) and if you’ve been following this series, not in the book, than you kinda wanted to know what was gonna come from all the cracks in this couple’s, as well as their family’s lives. You probably felt a little bad for them and hoped that some growing would take place and old patterns wouldn’t be followed.... Okay, maybe that was a bit much in the hoping department, cause unless you actually love this couple, you already know what’s to come. You know that there is no saving them and you wish that they would do themselves a favor and finally let go of the toxic strings that tie them together, but you also know that won’t happen.

After Ever Happy is what you get when you haven’t found a way or refuse to stop the push and the pull and you know your core audience will just follow you right to the edge of that cliff every time. As for me, I’m here for the downfall and the potential for a movie review.

See it can’t be for the spice cause that part was not good. There was maybe 2 maybe 3 spicy scenes in the entire film and the first was so ill-placed that I was done with it before it even finished, as with the rest of them. I’m sorry but the sex you use to fix your poor communication wasn’t enticing enough to my eyes or my feels, for me to say this works. 

It once again couldn’t be any of the parts in the story that I hoped would get some real attention either, cause spoiler alert, they didn’t. There are some heavy themes in this story and I just wanted something tangible done with them. You don’t have to preform a miracle, just do better. I’ve said this multiple times (across several reviews in this series) CARE ABOUT YOUR CHARACTERS!

Oh and although predictable, we’re not here for the continued rip on 50 Shades of Grey. Another thing I’ve mentioned before. A lot of romance novels eat off of each other’s plates, so much so that many are simply regurgitating the same story with slight variations. The After series takes big bites and expects folks not to notice or knows people see it and ignores that elephant in the room. Now this isn’t the downfall of this movie, it’s just funny that they do it and makes those parts worse. 

There is no growth here. This relationship is not everlasting. It’s not meant to defy all odds. It’s a burning building and anyone who tells you that this is what unconditional love looks like, has already breathed in too much smoke and can most likely not be saved, just like Tess cannot save Harden.

A positive though, is that the cast has finally gotten consistent. I didn’t see a recast of anyone I would have remembered and the people who are here now have been with us for at least 2 or 3 films at this point. You lose a lot with constant recasting, so thanks for keeping who you could.

Okay, so at this point we all know what we’re getting and just like Tumblr acknowledges what kind of platform they got, the After series is acknowledging the kind of toxic romance they’ve created. I haven’t seen them do that before, but I imagine if enough people tell you something about yourself, sometimes you have to admit defeat, thus bringing us here.It’s the 4th movie and possibly one of the first times that we’re all on the same page. Not for long though, cause we all saw that “To Be Continued...” and know there are 2 more movies to follow this one.

Here’s what we’re all gonna do.... We’re gonna keep going, cause we’re invested, we’re gonna keep saying that this relationship is toxic, so that everyone who romanticizes it doesn’t get a moment of peace and eventually realizes it too and then when this is all over we’re gonna move onto the next story with another toxic relationship. It’s called rinse and repeat for slight entertainment.

.

.

If you’re interested check out my reviews of After,  After We Collided and After We Fell, the first 3 films in this series, if you’re curious about what I thought of those movies. 

Bonus Spoiler Commentary Below:

I am not mad that Harden wrote a book about his and Tessa’s relationship as therapy, however I’m not big on the idea that he could just put it out there like that. The book seemed to cover every detail and I’d personally wouldn’t want my intimate life displayed like that without some knowledge or buffer. Like he just showed up with a manuscript and a meeting and she’s just supposed to be like “cool.” I don’t need Harden to be a good person, I just need him to stop with the BS and remember that the world doesn’t revolve around him.

#Movie Blurbs #Movie Reviews #After Ever Happy #After #After Series #Hero Fiennes Tiffin #Josephine Langford #Carter Jenkins #Arielle Kebbel #Chance Perdomo #Kiana Madeira #Stephen Moyer #Louise Lombard #Rob Estes #Mira Sorvino #Frances Turner #Jordan Peters #Based On Book #Anna Todd #Movies

[lily-orchard]

TW: RAPE MENTION (?)

Hi lily ^^,,, Feel free to ignore this, but you’ve always given good advice when it comes to relationship stuff so i thought id swing by and ask. i have a dear friend of mine, but the way she acts sometimes really… upsets and scares me. I don’t know the right word for this. I don’t know what to think. 

 i met her at my highschool (we are both 17) last year. she had no friends and everyone wrote her off as the “weird kid”. Everyone was (and still is) very rude to her. I started to talk to her because we had the same interest in music and books, and we got on really well.

Not even a week into us talking, she told me she had a crush on me. I was shocked, and told her I don’t feel the same but I still want to be her friend, which was true. 

 To make a long story short, over the past year her life has been really hard. Her parents are accepting of her transitioning but obviously, being transgender and coming out at a public school in inner city America is not easy. 

This is where I want some advice, because I genuinely don’t know if I’m overreacting or being a bitch. 

 Her mental health and over all happiness is in the gutter and it kills me to see her so hurt all the time, her life has not been easy. But.. I think she might be taking it out on me. She will call me crying, telling me she wants to die when she’s very upset, and begging me to come over. I always do, because I don’t want to see her hurt herself. 

 I hate admitting this. I really do. This is shorty of me but I don’t want to comfort her anymore. Because whenever i come to her house to be a shoulder to cry on, she either lashes out and starts screaming at me, throttling and shoving me while yelling about how easy it is for me, or the opposite. Crying, and needed comforting. I hug her, tell her it’ll be okay, but then she takes it too far. She always asks to kiss me after that, and if I try to say no she will revert back to mode A and get really upset. So… yeah. I think this is abuse? I think? Two months ago she basically convinced me to have s*x with her during one of those moments and I think… I was raped? She always holds the crush thing over my head, I felt like I had no choice but to say yes. If I said no I was scared she’d hurt me or herself. So I said yes. I don’t remember it at all, but I do remember waking up in her bed and wanting to cry. I got up and just sobbed in her bathroom for an hour until she woke up. I haven’t been eating, sleeping, and I keep having nightmares about it.

 I know this sounds bad but I don’t want to leave even if I know she hurts me. I met her at such a vulnerable time in her life and I’m literally her only friend. If I leave her she will actually kill herself. It would be so shitty if I left her, especially since I was her support line for her transition, and as a cis girl I was able to help her learn the ropes of that sort of stuff. I’m proud of her and I do love her. And I genuinely do care about her. I don’t know what to do. It feels like my life has been taken by her.

LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE!

#tw - rape mention #tw - abuse #tw - reactive abuse #tw - emotional abuse #tw - gaslighting #tw - trauma dumping