#I like thinking about io out in nature

[suddencolds]

.

#not snz and not a vent... just passive musing #had a dream two nights ago where someone who i used to know (and love a little) wished me goodbye with a #kiss to the hand before i flew away from them forever on a magic chair #which is very stud//io g//hi//bli-esque and frankly very unserious but #the feeling of grief i felt saying goodbye to a friendship which i had once held so close to me - and which i know can probably never #be as close as it was at that point in my life - stuck with me for a long time even after i woke up #it's been something i've been thinking about for awhile... but the dream felt like such a concrete and painful severance #i think that like a childish part of me wants to hold the people i'm close to at #the same distance and trust that they will stay there forever #but logically i know it's natural that the people i met under certain circumstances might drift apart once those circumstances change #for one or both of us... i guess friendship really is just a lucky convergence at one point in time where everything aligns #like i know this and i have known this for awhile but god does it hurt #especially those kinds of goodbyes that feel so gradual... not like a clear severing of ties but just a gradual disappearance #i think i probably have to not feel so hung up over what i used to have. and for the most part i am not; life goes on #but for those people? #i sometimes just miss them #there's a special kind of hurt knowing that i could reach out to them and say hello and that they would probably respond but that it might #never be quite the same again

[thefirstknife]

New thing to think about dropped. I've been losing it for a week now.

So, Whisper of the Worm mission always had a portal, in the big room just before the first enemy encounter. You could always get to the portal and look into it and it would show you... Vault of Glass! Even back in the day, before VoG was in D2, you could see it. There's a corresponding portal inside of Vault of Glass from which, in D2, you could see the Whisper mission.

This area with the portal was also a part of the mission, as oracles would appear and had to be shot in the right order for the exotic ship. Original view of the portal from before vaulting, looking into the Vault of Glass:

View into Whisper from VoG when it was released in D2 in Splicer:

These two things were never in the game at the same time until Into the Light! With the return of Whisper, they're finally together so you can go into VoG and look into Whisper, and vice versa. Or at least.... you can... Once.

When I did Whisper the first time it returned, I naturally went to the portal to check. It was showing the same image as it did before; Vault of Glass. This was the situation in Into the Light, on first clear (screenshot from a friend because I only have footage of it, this is much clearer):

All is well! The portals link!

Except when I did the mission again... The portal image changed and remained changed. It's not showing Vault of Glass anymore. This is what it shows for every clear after:

Absolutely bizarre. Going through the trouble of changing the image is quite wild if done for no reason. You don't really have to go to that area! And you would have to go to that area on your first clear to even notice the difference, so you would have to know that it's there and what it looked like before.

So what is the Whisper portal showing now? Absolutely no clue. The area is still in some sort of a cave, and it's very purple/dark. There's lights that might be Vex lights. The big central light could also be radiolaria? It's super hard to tell. I don't think it's looking into another area in VoG and I've tried comparing it to some other places mainly from Io or Venus, but I couldn't find something that matches from what little we can see.

But the fact that they changed the portal image can't be random. There's no need to do that at all in the first place, unless it's supposed to serve some purpose. Maybe some hint? I wonder if it will change again with reset, or maybe become clearer. I doubt there will be a lot of alterations going forward, if any, but I'll be checking every week for sure.

Also, there's oracles to shoot every week (2 available this week), for the new exotic ship associated with the mission. The original, A Thousand Wings and the new one, Karve of the Worm, comparison:

The only difference is the Vex effects on the new one, and a new flavour text. To get the new one, you have to destroy a total of 7 oracles to get the ship. At least one of these will for sure be somewhere near the portal, because that's where the ship quest originally was, and it involved oracles. I wonder if something might happen with the portal when that triumph becomes finishable and the ship obtainable. Not hoping for something huge, but I feel like changing that portal image means something and we'll eventually find out what.

#destiny 2 #whisper of the worm exotic mission #long post #particularly interested in the vex effects on the ship and the flavour text change about paracausality. hm #and that the ship is still tied to oracles. and that the vog portal changed. i feel like there's something going on #i am vexed once again

[winterspellsfrozenkit]

In case, you see either my two posts about Epic: The Musical about "There Are Other Ways" and "I'm Not Sorry For Loving You", I want to clarify that I have nothing but respect for Jay's ability to write music. He's talented and he knows what he's doing as the songs are very clever in both music and lyrics and knowing the story makes the songs more impactful. The writing is for "There Are Other Ways" and "I'm Not Sorry For Loving You" shows that Jay knows EXACTLY the situation happening and how to disguise it to hide the nature of what is happening.

That said, I despise these songs because having read the Odyssey, I know what is going on when the songs are happening, and when Jay released snippets of these songs, I saw a lot of people misunderstand the situation because they don't have the same context I do, which is what drives my aggravation.

The second factor that drives my frustration is I have a strong feeling that people who don't read the Odyssey and hear the album are going to misconstrue Odysseus's character into someone who claims to love his wife, but cheats (which he doesn't do) and use these songs as their "proof". Even before Epic came out, people have called Odysseus a cheater and I will admit, I get a touch heated about that because this is my stance: If people want to claim Medusa's later adaptation from Ovid, Persephone, Io, etc. are victims, then they should recognize that Odysseus is one too. If they refuse to acknowledge Odysseus as one, they need to do some soul searching and ask some REALLY uncomfy questions.

I want to be clear: I'm not upset at Jay's writing nor do I think his writing is terrible. Yes, I said "I'm Not Sorry For Loving You" is the worst song ever, but if you read the post, I try to make it clear I'm not coming after Jay's writing, I'm trying to make it clear what the song actually is, rather than what it innocently looks like. Another song I would call the worst song ever is Into The Woods "Any Moment" and that's because of what the song is. Writing's great, music's great, but I still think that song is the worst song ever in Into The Woods given it's Cinderella's Prince looking to incite the Baker's Wife to cheat with him.

Ever since I've read the Odyssey, I was horrified that Odysseus has been treated like a cheater a lot. To be clear, Odysseus does shady, sneaky stuff, but where his feelings on his wife and son are concerned, that is the one consistent. He wants to be with his family. In short, those two posts are basically this:

#epic: the musical #epic: the circe saga #epic the musical #jorge rivera herrans #odysseus loves his wife #odysseusxpenelope #odysseus of ithaca #i will die on this hill #circe #calypso

[garycxjk]

Why most people don't get Europapa

So, Joost Klein's Europapa apparently is taking the world by storm. With its happy hardcore or gabber house tunes and beats and the silly music video, there's no denying that this song has a certain charm, though it also has its detractors.

The thing is, though, most people on both sides don't fully get the song.

To summarize the song, it's essentially about an orphan who travels around Europe to find himself. Those were in Joost's own words.

Europapa is about an orphan who travels throughout Europe (and beyond) to find himself and tell his story. At first, people don’t recognise him, but he goes on seizing any opportunity he gets to let himself be seen. Europapa is a tribute to my father. When bringing me up, he passed on to me an expansive view of the world.

Okay, but why does the song sound so silly? Well, that's something deliberate. I don't really know much about Joost Klein's music, but what I do know is that this is basically what most of his songs are. Silly, yet deep.

Okay, brief detour to give context to the rest of what I'm writing, but it's important to remember that Joost Klein basically became an orphan at a young age. He lost his father to cancer when he was 12, and a year later, his mother died as well. This essentially shaped his music. From what I can gather from the many YouTube comments, he always watched Eurovision with his parents, and told them that one day he'd be there on stage.

So, let's just talk about the elephant in the room. Some people call this European propaganda. However, just the first few lines clue you in that it isn't just some pro-EU propaganda.

Welcome to Europe Stay here until I die

In fact, there are several lines used that wouldn't sit right if it were pro-EU propaganda. Let's look at the second verse.

Ich bin in Deutschland Aber ich bin so allein

Which roughly translates to

I'm in Germany But I'm so lonely

The next lines, "Io sono in Italia / Maar toch doet het pijn" (first line Italian, second line Dutch), which translates to "I'm in Italy / But I still feel pain".

Essentially, the entire song is him trying to let go of his past, to let go of his grief. That's essentially what the burning house and the windmill represent at the end, finally moving on from the past.

And that's essentially what the entire song is about. The entire song sounds like it's stuck in the '90s and early noughties. Naturally the most glaring part is the music style. Back in the '90s, happy hardcore and gabber house was really big, especially in the Netherlands. The way people dance back then and dressed when they did can be seen in the scene with Paul Elstak. Then there's the Gameboy Advance, which came out in the early 2000s.

Another cool thing is a reference to New Kids, a Dutch comedy show from 2007, when someone says "Welkom in Europa jongen!" ("Welcome in Europe boy!"). On the television screen, you can see Gerrie van Boven, played by Tim Haars, a character from New Kids.

But it isn't just a throwback. It's all being done deliberate. Something that gets lost in translation is the text. The rhymes work, however, to a Dutch person, it sounds a bit... childish. Very simple, at the very least. But I think that even that is done deliberately. It sounds like a child has been writing these lines, but I think that's the point of the song. It's supposed to sound like a child has been writing these lines.

The entire song is about the protagonist being stuck in the past, being stuck in his grief. It's why there's a disconnect between the text and the melody. Sure, it's a celebration of Europe, of Eurovision. Joost Klein genuinely loves Eurovision. However, it's also essentially him saying, this is me closing another chapter in my life.

Let's take a look at the outro of the song.

Op kruistocht in m'n spijkerbroek, lopend door de velden M'n papa en m'n mama zijn voor altijd mijn helden Aan het einde van de dag zijn we allemaal mensen M'n vader zei me ooit: "Het is een wereld zonder grenzen" Regen op het raam en ik stond huilend bij het venster Veel te vroeg duister, het is winter in de lente "Ik mis je elke dag", is wat ik stiekempjes fluister Zie je nou wel, pa? Ik heb naar je geluisterd

This... seems quite long, doesn't it? Well, that's because that's the full outro. What most hear during the video clip is this:

Aan het einde van de dag zijn we allemaal mensen M'n vader zei me ooit: "Het is een wereld zonder grenzen" "Ik mis je elke dag", is wat ik stiekempjes fluister Zie je nou wel, pa? Ik heb naar je geluisterd

Let's translate the full lyrics. I'll put the translations of the lyrics in the music video in bold and italic.

On my crusade in jeans, walking through the fields My dad and mom are forever my heroes At the end of the day we are all human beings My father once told me: "It's a world without borders" Rain on the window and I stood at the window crying Darkness far too soon, it's Winter in Spring "I miss you every day", is what I secretly whisper You see dad, I listened to you

So, basically, the gist is, this song has many layers. It's a heartfelt tribute to Eurovision, while also telling a personal story about grief and letting go of said grief.

Though I think this interview with Joost Klein on De Avondshow met Arjen Lubach may say more than I could.

Well, sometimes you must say goodbye to whatever is most dear to you. And when one door closes thousands of others open, apparently. But what I've learned is that you tend to hold on to your own pain sometimes. So this letter provides some sort of closure, dare I say. Saying: "Hey, Mum and Dad... You will always be there for me, but I can't carry this pain forever."

#europapa #joost klein #eurovision #eurovision 2024 #esc 2024 #eurovison song contest #the netherlands #Youtube

[lnmei]

Explaining some of my color thoughts and process using this piece and my other recent figure drawings, hope it’s helpful to someone!

Setting up the drawing to color

Final drawing layer breakdown from top:

Layer 37: lighten layer clipped to line art below

Inserted Image: line art set to multiply (because it’s non-transparent)

2nd Inserted Image: final drawing flattened (will explain why at last step)

Layer 35 : lighten layer to compress values for elements that receding and out of focus (back arm + leg for example) something like atmospheric perspective

Layer 41: solid color multiply for shadow

Layers 16-19: every element of the same color on it’s own layer clipped to the silhouette

Layer 6: solid fill silhouette

Color picking the base:

This is loosely what I think about rather than a hard and fast rule! This thinking helps me navigate when the colors don’t quite look right and applying a rule usually helps me work towards a direction I like.

When thinking of the light and shadow scheme:

Temperature: warm light & cool shadow or cool light & warm shadow?

Color schema: complimentary scheme? split compliment? analogous?

When picking the light color base:

Even in the light areas things have a light, medium, and dark local value

I pick colors that read as the right value of the local color at the right temperature for the light:

Coloring Shadow

1) Reflected light into the shadow areas - typically I go for a colder and slightly lighter reflected light because in natural sunlight, the main reflected light is from the blue sky. Otherwise think about what the color of the surroundings are and reflect that into the shadow.

2) If the shadow color on the skin makes it look either gray or the wrong hue, true up the color of the shadow by making it warmer and more saturated and add warm reflected light to the shadows around it, such as on the shirt collar

3) Make the shadow colorful - add bright colors that are adjacent to the main shadow colors to make the shadow overall more colorful, and add colors that are closer to the local colors of what’s in shadow (such as blues to the “black” compression sleeves)

Keep value range within the shadow relatively close - as long as the value of the shadow is approximately uniform, the shadow area will read as a shadow

Lighten-layer areas for value compression/”atmospheric perspective”: I adjust the color of the lighten areas so that local colors show through or have a bright accent - it looks nice but doesn’t detract from the focus areas with higher contrast, and gives an opportunity to introduce bright colors.

Even in low value contrast areas, the colors are legible as light vs shadow because they generally conform to the temperature of the light and shadows

Glow - I like to add a bright rim to the edge of the multiply layer in a bright color that indicates the color of the light or local color if it was more saturated i.e. red, orange, pink, gold glow for warm lights, purple, blue, green-ish glow for cool lights

I don’t add this everywhere, just in the parts that I want to stand out more

Hue Variation

On the base color layers, I add hue variations to add color variety to the lights. Usually adjacent colors but sometimes something completely different to add interest. I can also add this on the lighten layer if I want the bright accent to read as more flat (like the hair accent).

I also add a lighten layer with warm red/orange on top of the line art areas that are in the light to add more glow.

In the end, if there are certain color areas that just don’t look right, I will just paint in the exact color I want on a new layer on top.

Finalizing

I export the whole image as a jpg when I’m generally happy with it, then mess around with it using color filters like the ones in the iOS photo app edit or whatever else. They end up showing you if you can push the colors brighter, which I like (I don’t always do this but it usually shows me something interesting I can try).

I import the image over the color but under the line art and apply general adjustments to it (curves, saturation, etc). This way you can mask out different versions of the full image to combine versions with different adjustments.

I also select certain areas by themselves and adjust them manually to fine tune aka paint over if some parts don’t look right.

I like to apply a lighten layer to the line art which is on multiply, and use a neon/bright color to give the whole picture a bright rim. It just looks cool but can add a slight bit of new bright color to the drawing along the line art, which is interesting and subtle.

And that’s it so far!

#my art #process #ask questions if you have i'm happy to answer! #i like having my processes written out in detail to look at later…workflow is like it’s own art I’m saving it and moving on to new ones!

[hypnotisedfireflies]

I miss Lachie! I specifically miss Tess and Lachie, their family friendship warms my heart every time. Would you perhaps consider giving us a snippet of the two of them? Perhaps a late night conversation while they’re camping out on their way towards Jackson? (I’m desperate to hear anything more about their road trip)

(Also will Lachie make any appearances in IO???)

Hi anon! Thank you for your ask (and giving me the chance to pop back into Driftersverse!)

I don't think Lachie will be appearing in IO. I tend to keep the OCs to their respective universes, DD/SQ, IO, Charro, etc. But who knows??

Hope you like this little ficlet. It's set during the events of TLOU while Ellie and Joel are off Ellieing and Joeling and Tess is making the trip across country with Lachie. This is as they begin to reconnect after the Firefly crew has perished, and Lachie is experiencing the earliest trouble with his lungs that later leads to something worse.

Autumn, 2023 Wisconsin.

In Little Hope, Wisconsin, Lachie did something that he hadn’t done in years.

Dear Mum, Dad and Col.

Lachlan Maynard had penned letters on scraps of paper up and down the USA and posted them in every undamaged mailbox he could find.  He was very careful to address them neatly and correctly.  If everything got back on track – one day, eventually – those letters might make their way home.  Somebody had to empty the mailboxes eventually, right?  And when that happened – if, if that happened – then Lachie wanted that chance of some small piece of him finding his way home, even if he was long-dead and nobody remembered his name anymore.

Some time ago – when exactly, who knew – Lachie had stopped.  The hope that those letters might one day find their way across the ocean had not dwindled (however increasingly unlikely it seemed) but there were fewer things to say.  Sometimes, he didn’t really want his family to know what he’d done.  It was increasingly difficult to explain or justify the confusing nature of the Firefly cause, which sometimes seemed so righteous and other times seemed like a poorly organised terrorist chapter. 

There just wasn’t much he wanted to write home about anymore.

But on this bright, golden autumn day in Little Hope, Lachie felt the urge tickling his fingers once again.  He dug around until he found a pencil.  Lachie sharpened it carefully with his smallest knife and lifted the shavings to his nose.  He breathed them in.  Fresh, new pencils!  His cousin, Shannon, had a box of Derwents that she only used for special occasions.  Nobody else was allowed to use them, but sometimes Lachie liked to lift up the tin lid and have a good, long sniff. 

I am in Wisconsin, he wrote.

“Lachlan.”

He looked up.  He was sitting on the bonnet of the truck to soak up the sunshine.  Tess only called him by his full name when she really wanted his attention.  He looked right and saw her standing against the vibrant backdrop of autumn leaves.  Many were still doggedly clinging to their branches like they could outlast winter.  Lachie could feel its cold, deadly little talons digging deeper into every day.  It made him cough in the mornings.

“Everything okay?”  Lachie pined the paper to his thigh with the side of his hand.  The wind buffeted up a little whirlwind of dry, crackling leaves.

“Your … friend,” she said with as much tact as he could expect, “has a much warmer jacket than mine.  I’m gonna take it.  I just wanted to … tell you before I did it.”

“Oh.”

Lachie glanced at the low ditch on the side of the road where Toni lay.   She’d fallen and suffered a terrible gash to her leg the day before, and had died in the back of the truck during the night.  Catastrophic blood loss.  Lachie used to think Toni was all right, but Toni hadn’t liked Tess, and Toni had made it clear – loudly and often – that Tess would be easier to transport with her vitals preserved in jars.  Dev (before he got himself ripped up by two clickers) told Lachie Toni’s prejudice was rooted in fear, and she was convinced Tess would turn eventually.  Some of the others were, too.   Toni also wanted Tess on reduced rations, and she wanted her restrained at all times. 

Tess gained her full freedom when the numbers of their team dwindled so pitifully that they desperately needed the extra, free hands.  Toni mouthed off only once more after that.  Tess decked her with two hard, savage hits, breaking the other woman’s nose.  The others just looked on – Toni had said some shit, after all.  And Lachie grinned as he gathered up some supplies to treat the injury.  He suddenly felt just that little bit safer.

Tess never had held back.

“I’ll help you,” he suggested.

Lachie jammed the paper in his pocket and pencil behind his ear.  He followed Tess to the ditch and helped skin the thick, fleece-lined jacket down Toni’s arms. 

“You want her boots?”

Tess considered it.  “No, they’re too small for me.”

“Let’s take her jumper too, just in case.”

“Jumper,” Tess repeated, grinning at him.

“You know what I mean.”

“What happened to your accent?”

“It has its moments.”

They completed the grisly task of stripping Toni for the last of her worth and then covered her body with leaves.  The ground wasn’t too hard yet.  They could bury her.  But Lachie didn’t see the point in going to that effort.  They needed to conserve their calories.  And Little Hope was a nice enough place in the world to become bird food.  Toni could do worse.

“Guess that makes you two even for the hard time she gave you.”

“Shut the fuck up,” Tess muttered, shedding her own jacket and dressing in Toni’s.  She emptied the pockets of meaningless trinkets, then turned up the collar.  “Thanks for making that easy.”

“Yeah, no problem.”

“I know she was your friend so … I’m sorry.”

Lachie squinted as another squall twisted a pile of leaves up into a new dance.  “It doesn’t matter.”

The breeze lifted Tess’s hair.   She had long, silver strands throughout now.  It was still kind of hard for Lachie to believe she was really standing there, really alive.  He’d never had any doubt that she’d made it through the years – if anyone could, it was her – but the fact that their paths had crossed again was a miracle he couldn’t overlook.  It was almost more incredible than her surviving becoming infected, for fuck’s sake.

“We should make camp,” Lachie suggested.  “I reckon we’ve come far enough today.”

Tess was scanning the handful of crumbling old buildings.  This must have been a charming little town, once.  There was next to nothing here, but it had a postcard-selling vibe. 

“You feel up to trying a building or two?”

“Sure.” Lachie shrugged.  “What are we looking for?”

“I want to get you out of the cold, for starters,” Tess said, already pulling out her handgun and checking the load.  “The coughing in the morning’s getting worse.”

“Nah, that’s just – yeah, nah, that’s nothing,” Lachie tried to wave it off.  “That’s just – I had asthma kind of bad when I was a kid and sometimes it acts up a bit, that’s all.”

“Well, the cold can’t be helping.  Let’s find something with a bit more shelter tonight, okay?”

He was kind of stoked that she gave a shit.  Tess had looked out for him when they were in Indy, too.  He was definitely just an afterthought behind Joel and Tommy and Rachel, but the fact that she’d given a damn at all had meant something to him then, and it still did now.  And well – hey.  It was probably just strategy on her part.  Two of them stood a better chance of making it cross country than one alone.  But then she met his gaze and he recognised a softness entirely separate to survival. 

“Okay?” 

Lachie nodded.  “Yeah, okay.”

“Let’s try that one first.”

“You’re the boss.”

Tess, who had already turned away, stiffened.  Lachie looked on ahead.  Had she seen something?  And then Tess snapped the cartridge into place and plowed on ahead to the building.

“Come on, move.”

The town had been abandoned by living, dead and infected for a very, very long time.  The general store had been turned over of absolutely everything of value and there was a single, crumpled human who had perished at some phase of infection.  They were almost skeletal, their body and ragged clothing ruptured by powdery, dry fungal plates. 

At the back of the general store was a room claimed by the sky.  Half the roof was missing.  Tess and Lachie built their fire here, where the smoke could pour up into the air, and the walls around them would provide some warmth against the coming night.  Lachie pulled out two FEDRA-issued dinner ration packs.  The grade was excellent.

“Do you want Butter Chicken or Beef Ragu?”

“Have we got any of the Chicken Italiano left?”

“Nope.”

“Ragu, then.”

They prepared the meal packets in boiling water and ate inside their sleeping bags on two sides of the fire.  Tess had been right.  He felt warmer with the wall against his back, and there was no wind in the old structure, save that which whistled through the cracks.

“You know what really pisses me off about these?”  Tess said, poking around her bag with a fork.

“That they’re better than what ration cards could buy?”

“Yes,” she answered, sounding mildly annoyed that he guessed right. “The shit we used to eat in Boston sometimes, you know?  We knew what they were feeding the soldiers was better than what we got, but this is something else.”

Always we.  We did this, we did that.  Tess couldn’t name Joel, but he was always moving in and out of the conversation. 

“Fireflies didn’t have this stuff most of the time either,” Lachie admitted.  “Think we were eating better than most civilians though, if you were stationed outside the zones, that is.”

“Like you were.”

“Yeah, like I was.  Funny when you think we were only a few miles apart for years.”

Tess didn't respond.

“Anyway,” Lachie continued.  “Fireflies were raiding stuff all the time, but when they got their hands on premium rations like these, they stockpiled them for the big ticket events.”

“Like a cross-country trek?”

“Yeah. Build up the strength, that sort of thing. Speaking of.  We should reach that Firefly supply cache tomorrow, all things going well.”

“White Earth Reservation?”

“Yeah?” Lachie shot her a suspicious glance. “How'd you know that?”

“I've been listening. My ears weren't handcuffed.”

“This is gonna be awkward for awhile, isn't it?”

“Till the day you die, Lachlan.”

He coughed softly and set his meal aside. They'd argued about this many times already:  he'd plead his sorry case and she'd stonily stared him down.

“White Earth Reservation,” he confirmed, pulling out a map.  He held it up to Tess and followed a general route along the top of the country with his finger.  “So we’re … like … hereabouts.  We come up north into Minnesota – avoid Minneapolis, I’ve heard shit from there that’d make your hair curl – and come at the Reservation this way.”

Tess was studying the map with great interest, so he passed it into her custody. “Is anyone stationed there?”

“Supposed to have been deserted for a few years. Unless they sent someone up there from the east, I dunno. Seems unlikely, though. So yeah, nah. We'll scoop in and grab the gear, then go down through the Dakotas.”

“To Salt Lake City?”

Lachie held his breath while he calculated his answer. He sighed and picked up his chicken. That had been the original mission. Evacuate Massachusetts, empty the final Firefly caches cross country and regroup with the dwindling remnants of the cause out west. Deliver the subject - Tess - to Salt Lake City for further study.

There was nothing in that mandate about locating Tommy Miller out in whoop-whoop Wyoming or reuniting the subject with her spiritual husband.

“Maybe after,” Lachie mumbled around a mouthful of rations. “See if that dickhead Tommo’s all right first, maybe.”

“How… how was he last time you saw him?”

“I didn't know there was a problem till he fucked off without saying goodbye. I knew he wasn't happy but … shit, is anybody? You really think he's in trouble?”

“Maybe.”

“This trip was really for Joel, huh? He needed to know what was what.”

“It was for us both,” Tess quietly answered. “I don't know if we ever meant to stay so long.”

“In Boston?”

“We had an apartment,” she continued, eyes on the fire. “Living every day in a fucked up dollhouse for thirteen years.”

“A lifetime.”

“A parody.”

“Why didn't you leave?”

“Go where?”

“I dunno. Tommo said you'd come from some place up in the mountains. South? Could've gone back, tried for it. If anyone could've made it, it was you two.”

Tess shook her head slightly. “Bit past happy endings by then, Lachie.”

“Well,” he finished his meal. “Guess it's a good thing it's now. Hey Tess? Can do shitloads with now.”

“You're still painfully optimistic.”

He laughed a little. Sure. It was easy to have hope in and for other people. The heat was off.

He waited until Tess was asleep before digging out his letter again. He deliberated over the cordial lines and wondered what he could add. So deep in concentration was he that the bottom of the page caught on an ember and smoked. He swore softly and smothered both flame and another coughing fit.

Going to Yellowstone.

He didn't write any more until the following morning. Tess helped him sit up as a more aggressive spate of coughs woke him.

“This is asthma?” She asked, passing a flask of water.

“Woodsmoke doesn't do me any favours,” he managed, rubbing his watery eyes.

Tess didn't seem convinced. She did most of the packing up and loading while Lachie got himself together.

“I'll drive,” Tess announced.

“Yeah, no worries.”

“You ready?”

“Yeah, just give me a sec.”

Lachie looked down at his measly letter. He glanced at Tess, who was circling the truck and checking the tyres.

Catching up with some old mates.

He pushed the letter into a mailbox as Tess turned the ignition over.

#driftersverse #tlou #asks #the last of us #tlou fanfic #tess servopoulos

[merrivia]

I’ve finally read Pet and am kicking myself I didn’t read it sooner!

I’ve measured out the short stories like I’m nibbling on chocolate, Charlie Bucket style, and I was leaving this till last partly because of that, and partly because I didn’t feel that interested in Ancel (sorry Ancel, I take it back).

It’s fascinating reading about events that occur in Captive Prince but not from Damen’s POV. The idea that everyone has complexities under the surface, and that things aren't always as they seem, is only understood by Damen negatively in the first half of Captive Prince I think. Veretians are untrustworthy and slippery and Machiavellian. And that's not, not true! The Veretian court IS a pit of vipers. But people are also still human, and it's that extra step of understanding the humanity underneath even these acidic, performative snakes which is interesting. Ancel is sharp and smart (and really needs to be taught how to read forthwith). Berenger is morally admirable, and isn't actually sleeping with him. Vannes cares about Berenger in her own small way. Laurent emits a great deal of power and is "instantly commanding" to others (but not to Damen, which must have really infuriated him).

Here’s some more snippets of my thoughts in general:

Waxing is canon! So interesting. Why does no grown man ever shave in the books also? Why isn't attending, also shaving? I think we'll just have to accept that as Pacat's choice. Maybe the only blade she wanted between them was the ghost of swords from a long ago fight/swords in the present?

Isagoras the writer/poet- any connection to Isagoras the historical figure who was embroiled in a power play in terms of Athenian politics and democracy? Who Aristotle called ‘friend of tyrants’? Obviously he’s not meant to be that figure but is it a sort of irony and foreshadowing for the political choices Berenger has to make?

And Akielon writing/poetry is popular among men with status? Interesting. You wonder if Laurent approved a poem waxing lyrical about Ios, or really anything that suggested the Akielons aren't barbarians.

I feel as if Damen would know this poem, and read it to Laurent as part of courting him 🥺

Interesting to see a first impression of Laurent from the viewpoint of someone not instantly obsessed with him- severe and harsh, but no mention of his beauty till later.

I mean this nicely but Damen really has no idea how naturally arrogant and superior he comes across as in this situation, does he? I mean, it’s completely understandable if you think of Akielon society, and how he’s been raised and treated; in fact it would be implausible any other way based on his character traits too. He’s just so bad at pretending to be a slave even as his life is at risk if they find out he’s a prince 😂 oh Damen /pets his curls/. And oh, a *lion* you say....

Just really bad at acting servile, it's so funny. Love him.

Speaking of Lamen, it is a little unsettling how quickly Damen starts to fall for Laurent in Captive Prince and how Laurent truly does hate him, yet…is clearly on some molecular level, attracted to him, I think? It’s just a really heartbreaking and stressful dynamic. His "complete attention" on him...let's face it, if Damen had looked like Govart, Laurent wouldn't be fixated in the same way (I mean this nicely).

Oh my baby Laurent. You know this isn’t right. Are you reenacting a past trauma? Making him suffer what you suffered? Even if you aren’t, your flaw is letting your hatred and anger blind you to your morals. (Lucky a man is going to fall in love with you who is pretty much always on your side even when you don’t always deserve it…). Damen will help you be more honourable /pats blond head/

"Locked” is an apt word isn’t it, considering all that ties them together (and not to mention the gold cuffs and collar…) and oof, Laurent's sexual domination in this scene is quite apparent.

and…

I mean, we all know this is sex by proxy and so does Ancel, who just met Laurent and Damen!

And lastly, I am team Berenger. He's a Good Man and would probably get on pretty well with Torveld and Nikandros, the other dark haired, loyal and responsible men in the trilogy.

Nice to see someone see commoners as people all year round (not simply when their villages are being massacred and their humanity is thrown into stark relief by it)!

#captive prince #pet #ancel #berenger #damen #laurent #lamen

[coldshrugs]

talk me down

pairing: io laithe/estinien varlineau word count: 1.8k note: this is a modern au in which io and estinien are roommates but io has been offered an orchestra chair in a city across the country; she accepts it. estinien is grumpy about it. some cursing and alcohol mentions.

There’s nothing between them—not like that anyway—so why is he bothered?

Io would be stupid not to take this opportunity. Estinien told her that much. He insisted. And when it became real, well… it was easier to be excited about an application than the acceptance.

Now it's easier to hide.

Estinien shifts his weight and the fire escape creaks, another notch in his confidence that this place is actually suitable for inhabitants. The rent is cheap and the neighbors mind their business. That's always been good enough, because Io made it home.

The sounds of her going-away party stream from the window he crawled through. He tries not to think about each second bringing tomorrow that much closer. Focuses instead on the cars a few stories below, the wail of a siren in the distance, the glittering lights and warm breeze and none of it works.

Two years in this apartment together, a few years of therapy and studying and feeling each other out before that. “Friends” doesn’t feel like the right word, but it's the word he's got. The word they use.

Tomorrow he will take her to the airport and watch her fly east, and that will be that.

“Hey,” she says, more question than greeting. Io is already halfway through the window by the time Estinien turns around. “I thought you’d be out here. Everything okay?”

Last he saw her, she and their friends were getting a little rowdy during a drinking game, making the kind of memories he isn’t ready to accept as only memories. Each time she laughs, it’s a reminder this is finite. This isn’t how his life will be next week, or six months from now, and will they even be in contact next year? Just… fuck. So he came out to the fire escape (where it’s easier to hear her if he can’t see her), a reasonable behavior any of the people inside would expect from him.

Except for Io, who knew a going-away party was not his idea from the moment she walked through the door. And she knows he’s not out here just for a smoke.

Her hair has frizzed a bit with the sheer amount of body heat in their apartment. She wears an alcohol blush and a smile that says I can leave you alone if you want. But that’s the last thing he wants so he digs deep, past his natural inclination to run away.

“Just needed some air.” He lights a cigarette and leans against the rusted metal railing. An invitation if she wants it. “You know how it is. How I am.”

Io nods, and the sobering breath she takes, the mental armor she slips on to be around him right now... it kills him. He thought he was doing a decent job of keeping his sulking to himself. Her eyes flick to his, then out at the restless city as she says, “If there’s one thing I know, it’s you.”

But she decides to ignore the eggshells for now and pulls up next to him at the railing, their backs to the noisy street below and the bright lights beyond. Shoulder pressed tight to shoulder, and there's nothing between them.

They face the worn, brown-brick building. Their home. Tucked into the corner of the fire escape, Estinien catches only blurred glimpses of the party inside, but someone (Thancred) has found his guitar and a chorus of off-key voices squeeze out of the partially open window to join them in this already public hideout.

Io hums along for a line or two, then nudges him gently. “You like this song.”

“Alberic likes this song,” he corrects.

“And you like what he likes. Albie may not be your dad, but your taste in music? Something genetic about that.”

A tiny part of him wishes she would stop. That she wouldn’t put her blowout evening on pause just to stand in the dark with him. That she’d do him the service of pretending she doesn’t know his life inside and out.

But the bigger part of him is selfish.

He nudges back. “Yeah, well, you try being impressionable and depressed at fourteen, getting dragged to Blue October and Hinder shows every month. Not my fault it stuck.”

“I think it’s sweet.” Io shrugs. “It’s not just Albie, either. I like how you pick up things from people you love.”

What does he say to that?

His responses snag on "I like how you," trying to twist it into something... Something. So he takes a long drag from his cigarette and says nothing. As they stand there, listening to their friends (badly) sing this song, leaning on each other a little heavier than before, he wonders what she thinks he’s picked up from her.

The song ends in a round of cheers and whoops that cut through this little calm. Estinien shakes his head. Maybe they should go back in. He might be more fun after a couple of shots.

Next to him, Io laughs. The sound is small and out of focus, her real laugh. It’d be lost in the noise inside, so he commits to a few more minutes on this metal deathtrap.

“What?” He passes her the cigarette and she takes it without looking.

He looks though, watching the way their fingers graze, barely, handling something small and smoldering so delicately. Watches her follow some movement from inside, her smile creeping from lips to eyes until the skin on her nose wrinkles. A strand of dark hair blows across her cheek. She raises the cigarette to her mouth, pulls in a slow breath, and his smoke rolls between her lips and into the night.

She passes it back to him, still looking inside.

“Urianger just cleared the table for a tarot reading, but Tataru picked up his spread like he dealt her a hand of poker.” She mimics holding the cards, laughing again. Looks like her buzz is back, and maybe he’s catching it too. “He looks crushed. Ugh, I'll miss this. How am I supposed to do this without you guys?”

Estinien chuckles. He takes a final draw and stubs out the finished cigarette. “They'll be lost without you and you know it. You won't be left out of anything, whether you like it or not.”

“What about you?” She turns to him, breaking the line of warmth at their sides. Replacing it with a teasing smile. “Can't wait for me to go so you can finally have some peace and quiet?”

He looks through the grates under their feet, thinking about this apartment—this city—without Io: Never finding his clothes in her laundry, no surprise takeouts when he’s home late from work, not getting absorbed into her fucking obscure dramedy binge-watches. Her quiet hope, the music she radiates even in silence. The thing that’s taking her away.

How did she come to occupy so much space in his life, burning through him, like smoke in his lungs? Their friends won't be the only ones lost without her.

“That’s not true.” His lop-sided grin feels out of place in this sea of sudden nerves. Honesty has never been a difficult thing before tonight. “I’m gonna miss you like hell. I just—” he looks at her, and now he’s the one being watched. She holds him in those big, dark eyes, and maybe there is something between them. Maybe it’s always been there, dormant, or intrinsic and now he's forced to see it for what it is. “I just worry you leaving means we won’t… be like this anymore. That you won’t miss me like I’ll miss you.”

“Estinien—”

“Io—”

“Hey,” she says. Comfort, not a greeting. She surges forward, arms around his neck and waves of puffy blue hair in his face. He feels her cheek on his neck. Her breath, warmer than the night.

The railing is a  sharp pressure against his back as he wraps his arms around her, squeezing her closer. The wind moves their hair and clothes, but they stay, swaying when one repositions an arm or chin. The lights and sounds fade to nothing. There’s only this.

Estinien isn’t ready to let go when Io loosens her grip and pulls back. He hasn’t fully etched the feel of holding her this close into his memory—then there's another feeling. Io presses a kiss to his cheek, so soft he isn’t sure it’s real. She turns her eyes on him again, and his are wide with surprise.

“Estinien." Her voice is low. It shakes. "All I can think about is how I miss you already.”

She lingers, too close to the corner of his lips, arms loose around his neck. Her full weight leans against him, trusting him to hold them both upright. What the fuck is happening? He hasn’t processed her breath rushing over his mouth or her half-closed eyes when she pointedly brushes her nose against his.

He doesn’t know when he started wanting this, but good god, he does. Whether she is in the next room or two thousand miles away isn’t going to change that.

He nods. Their faces glance. There is something comforting in the way even that new touch feels natural. They hover in the almost of it all, and Estinien wonders for the first and final time what Io’s lips will feel like against his, how she tastes.

They meet, then they sink. He follows her lead, the gentle press and the beginning of a hungry rhythm. Her hand drifting from his shoulder to the nape of his neck, and he shivers at the thought of her sliding it into his hair, fingers tangled and tugging—

Glass breaks, and so does their kiss.

“Shit!” Cid’s unmistakable voice is thick and slurred.

Io bolts toward the window. “What on earth did they do?”

“Hey,” Estinien says softly. She turns back to him and when they're eye to eye, he knows she finds his meaning without the need to spell it out. She’s confused like he is, and sheepish delight brightens her expression as she waits for him. “Are we okay?”

“We’re always okay.” She climbs back into the apartment and pokes through the window again. “Now please come back inside. I don’t want to be at the party you planned if you’re not there.”

She air quotes you and planned. Estinien laughs through his nose, but even this pulls him toward her.

“Fine. Move so I can get through.”

They rejoin their friends. Tomorrow still fucking sucks. The difference is now Estinien thinks about how his life will be next week, or six months from now, and how many times he will have kissed Io by next year.

#azia writes #io/estinien #io laithe #otwr au #i truly do not know what is happening anymore but #i'm having fun #i miss writing modern stuff like. the energy i had during the wayhaven days flowed through me for this one #i'm not editing this. it's just write and post. BYE #i feel like. they're not saying or doing enough in this #but that's fine because in the story of this au that's in my head all of this means so much a;sljfdlsk

[frownyalfred]

Hi, I'm sorry to bother but do you know about this?

https://mobile.twitter.com/hitthebookspost/status/1557621677508513792

If you don't, I hope you can read this, and maybe you can repost about this...

Again I'm sorry to bother but this woman is like Umbridge in Harry Potter. Really. It's terrified.

Yes, I've seen that. I've been pondering how to talk about this, as I've seen other authors/blogs bring it up.

It's no secret that I love and use ao3. I've been on fanfiction.net, LiveJournal, Dreamwidth, etc etc in my time. I've seen fanfiction purges and policing, and it's almost always to users' detriment.

There are many topics and stories I don't personally agree with. I know the adage "don't like don't read" is a bit overused, but I stand by it. Personally, I hate reading stories about underage sex/abuse. It grosses me out. I stay away from stories about graphic sexual assault and rape; it triggers me.

But that doesn't mean I want those stories wiped off the internet. And who am I to really draw that moral line, anyway? If, say, I purge ao3 of pedophilia and any underage sex, will non-con and dub-con be on the chopping block next? Who decides that?

Proponents of "curation" on fanfiction sites make a similar, parallel "slippery slope" argument. They claim that easy and visible access to topics like child abuse or incest will lead to inappropriate behavior or beliefs in real life. It will legitimize these topics, and encourage such actions.

I don't think I need to tell most people that reading about something doesn't mean you like it, endorse it, or want to perform it in real life. Nobody ever asks men who read American Psycho if they maybe shouldn't have, in case they start killing women left and right. Just because I read a story where siblings sleep together (hello, Game of Thrones?) doesn't mean I want that to happen in real life!

The candidate referred to in the tweet seems to be not so subtly endorsing fandom censorship. You can read her interview at the link above, and it's chilling. She seems indifferent to the nuances of these discussions, ones we've been having for years on tumblr and in reaction to fandom purges.

Fanfiction is censored, corralled and contained when it looks bad for owners, companies, and sites. When advertising interests hesitate to put their ads next to graphic smut, capitalism reacts accordingly. IOS hides things on tumblr mobile because it's about money.

And that's exactly what ao3 was created to avoid. It is user-owned and operated. It is literally -- literally -- an archive of our own.

I support the hell out of ao3, and I always reblog posts encouraging others to do so if possible. We finally have a goddamned "safe space" for any kind of fiction under the sun -- any -- and we're risking it over a candidate who appeals to misinformed, underinformed moralism.

I can't blame new fandom members for getting caught up in it. Especially teenagers. They're still figuring out where they personally draw the line. Of course they're clumsy, and apply that filter to everyone around them. It's human nature.

I encourage every reader and non-reader alike to consider where their opposition to certain topics and stories stems from. Is it personal? Moral? If this story was a book at a library, would you ask the librarian to toss it in the shredder? Or would you simply put it down and walk away?

In the United States, even atheists and non-Christians are still unconsciously performing Christian, moralistic values. We do things for the sake of the "children" that make very little, logical impact on perceived ills. We are all (even me, and I'm Jewish) subject to this line of thinking, even if we reject it.

My opinion at the end of the day is that well-tagged, well-described, age-gated content should be allowed to exist on ao3 with very few, if any, limitations. If you don't like the tags -- great! The system worked! Read something else.

"Don't like, don't read" needs an update. In my mind, I've been calling it "bag it, tag it, don't wag it" which I know is silly, but it covers all the bases. Put your content in the correct category (explicit, etc) tag it correctly (sexual assault, etc) and don't shame others for what they choose to consume.

Anyway. If you're a member of ao3 (donated 10$ or more in the last year) you're eligible to vote in the board elections. I highly encourage you to do so. You can learn more about the discourse at the link above, or at ao3's elections page.

#whew #that was a bit of a rant #rant #thoughts #ao3 #archive of our own #ao3 elections #fic #fic things #fandom #fanfiction #fanfic #ffnet #fanfiction.net #censorship

[trashexplorer]

BLCD Review: Nikurashii Kare

Title: Nikurashii Kare (憎らしい彼)

Author/Artist: Nagira Yuu

Shop: CD + Manga

Release Date: 2021/07/23

Cast:

Ono Yuuki x Saitou Souma

Morikawa Toshiyuki

Matsumoto Takuya

Matsui Akiha

Maeda Hiroki

Tonozaki Yuusuke

Horie Shun

Sahara Io

Miyama Mari

Kumagai Mirei

Yamane Masashi

Tamano Shouyo

Miki Shinichiro lmaooo so random

Synopsis: Second installment of the series.

Review Proper

My brain too smooth for this. Don't get me wrong—it's good, but I don't have the patience to sit through three CDs of this. 😂 I fell asleep 5 times. A new record!

It would've been better if Hira just stopped talking to me in formal Japanese 'cause it makes my brain crash. He says a lot of deep things when he can't even grasp the shallowest of concepts. I also have a love-hate relationship with Hira's train of thought 'cause how can he jump to all these conclusions but never the right ones? He's still absolutely sad in the head, but idk, I'm here for it lmaooo.

The same goes with Kiyoi. Like boi, you're the only one with half of a functioning brain here, so idk, use it?

Kiyoi: "I don't wanna be with you anymore."

Hira: *leaves

Kiyoi:

Like in the first BLCD, I still can't figure out if I should feel concerned for him or Hira. I mean, if someone I knew had this relationship, I would personally ask both of them to leave each other and see a shrink. 😂 I dare say that their relationship would be the most normal one there is if Kiyoi wasn't such a tsundere and if Hira was just less of a weirdo.

How are we bringing your parents into this already when you have a wack-ass relationship???

But hey, nothing like a good kidnappin' and one mc almost dyin' to solve communication issues, right?

The things you do, Nagira Yuu.

As usual, the voice work is phenomenal. Saitou Souma won as best voice actor for Kiyoi at the chilchil 2023 awards while Ono Yuuki placed 2nd for Hira. There's just something special about Saitou Souma and Ono Yuuki in Utsukushii Kare. Their chemistry is good and so natural! It's like they bring out the best in each other. I especially love hearing Ono Yuuki come undone under Saitou Souma's Kiyoi but immediately get his revenge in disc 3.

I'm already nominating this as Souma's best match up in 2021. Sorry, Makonyan. Let's see if someone else rises to the challenge.

As for the accuracy...

So I've actually tried listening to this back in 2022. Yes, I'm writing this review in 2024, and this is the very CD that caused my burn out lmaooo. From what I read from the trial, it doesn't start the same as the novel, so I was confused. I didn't take the liberty of buying the whole novel, so I'm not sure if they really do have the same content. They do have the same name, though. Idk. Again, Hira speaks in formal/old Japanese, so the struggle made me put this off. 😅 And it just snowballed from there 'cause I'm loyal to my log. I don't keep up with the manga either, but I think the third volume is still at Utsukushii Kare and not Nikurashii Kare.

Long story short, I can't say if it's accurate to the source material, and I won't be able to recommend read-alongs for both Utsukushii Kare and Nikurashii Kare.

The two installments are equally interesting. Both are jam-packed with nicely paced content. I feel more comfortable with Nikurashii Kare, though, 'cause Hira made me uncomfortable in Utsukushii Kare, while it was Shitara who made me uncomfortable in Nikurashii Kare lmaooo. I loved Hira's little character development here, and I wish I could say the same for Kiyoi.😂The comedy and action were also good, and Moririn's presence made it 100 times better. It might not make my 2021 faves, but it's definitely one of the best-produced ones—it won best BLCD at chilchil 2023 for a reason.

Let's pray to god I survive the third installment. 🤞

#blcd reviews #blcd 2021 reviews #nikurashii kare #ginger records #nagira yuu #ono yuuki #saitou souma #morikawa toshiyuki

[love-triangles-au]

Gotta know, which Triangle is needier?

(Mod Minty let me steal her art for today's edition of the gay geometry channel. Say "thanks Minty for letting us see your gorgeous art!")

Bill, by a longshot!

Y'see, when he eventually realized that he actually does kind of give a crap about Venuz, he became aware of something: oh, no, a whole lot of people want my loved one dead. Sound familiar?

With that realization comes an immediate (and in his mind extremely embarrassing) trauma response. The last time he loved someone, they were taken from him brutally and unfairly, and the very nature of Venuz being the Gun God means that he is destined to eventually be succeeded.

Now, rationally, what happened to Liam was not at all Bill's fault -- his big brother was basically doomed from the moment he was born -- but as we all know trauma loves to make no sense. Because Liam was taken away while Bill was out, a part of him feels like if he had just been there maybe he could've done something.

And so we begin what we've dubbed the "separation anxiety arc".

He tries to bottle it up, god knows he does, because if Bill's good at anything it's pretending like everything's okay, but the moment Venuz goes to walk out the door it's like being hit with a bolt of lightning made of "what-if"s.

Luckily for him, the first couple times Venuz can just stay home or take him with him. Frankly, more often than not he goes to work as more of a way to keep the day interesting than anything else, but eventually it becomes clear that this is a serious problem.

The more the behaviour is enabled, the worse it gets, and the worse it gets the less Bill's excuses for his behaviour add up. Eventually, he lets it slip.

Once Venuz is aware, it begins to stress him out because there's nothing he can really do to help and he hates seeing Bill so uncharacteristically afraid. All he can really do is distract him at best, because he doesn't know any other way.

And then, one day, he has a lightbulb moment: vacation time! Far away planet (I dunno why but I've leaned towards Io, one of Jupiter's moons), no mortals, no guns. Bill really, really likes this idea, and so they hop in one of Venuz's 50 cars and, when they arrive, Bill finally feels a little better again.

Now, Bill doesn't have very much. As far as he's concerned, he's got his Veeny with him and they're perfectly safe right here. So, he basically pitches that they just stay there forever and live happily ever after.

But, they can't, and here's where another piece of our Gun God lore pops up.

The Gun God's power is tied to Venus itself, and he can't be away from the planet for too long without his powers fading. This prevents the Gun God from just dipping and living out in the deep recesses of space for all eternity, keeps the machine running so to speak.

So, they have to eventually go back.

We haven't got much further than this, but the current thoughts are that anxiety does get better with time (I have an anxiety disorder and know this firsthand), so that will likely ease him a little eventually.

BUT, where things get muddy here is that what Bill's afraid of isn't entirely irrational. Venuz is gonna get into gunfights, people are gonna come try to kill him, it's unavoidable. Thankfully, each Gun God tends to rule for a longer period of time than the last, because his skills only get better with each iteration. So, Venuz is very likely to keep his position for a couple thousand years at the least. But, the chance of him meeting an early demise is never zero.

I think the only way he's gonna get through this is if Venuz helps him through it, and even then I don't think it ever entirely goes away; dude's got like a trillion years worth of suppressed trauma, that doesn't just heal overnight. I think if Venuz is able to consistently prove that he's the best gunman on the planet that will gradually make Bill feel a bit better, but it would need to be consistent, like maybe Bill watches him train every day.

And, okay, when I said we hadn't gotten much further than this, that was kind of a lie; Bill's post-marriage activities very much revolve around this anxiety he feels around losing the fabled Only Guy He Cares About™.

With inclusion into the Yung family, he also becomes immortal and gains Venuz's powers. So, what's the logical thing to do with this newfound power, then? Begin an underground criminal organization dedicated to snuffing out possible competition before it can get to Venuz, of course!

The return of some of his power gives him the confidence that he can protect Venuz himself and that's when he forms his whole mafia operation. And, of course, Bill always thinks he's the smartest guy in the room, so he's often able to fool himself into thinking his plans are air-tight and cannot possibly fail and that suppresses his anxiety as well.

However, he does still sometimes have the occasional moments of doubt that result in full little kid meltdowns. He still needs occasional blanket time to calm down.

~ Mod Emily 🦇

P.S.: Sorry for the slowness on asks right now! It usually means we're wanting to draw something for it, so sit tight; we see you! :D

#love triangles au #mod emily #ask box #yungbill #bill cipher #yung venuz #nuclear throne #gravity falls #gun godz #art #minty's art

[tssdresses]

The dress of Io

@tulipscomeinallsortsofcolors (hi please let me know about any pronoun mess ups and I'll edit the post, I think I got them right, but... just to be safe)

There have been a few iterations of designs for Io’s dress— all of which have very flowery inspirations. I sent Violet an ask and the first thing bay said was “something vaguely gauzy with a petal skirt,’ so that’s been a heavy part of all the deign ideas thus far. 

So, over various asks and time and fics, the needed elements are:

Colors: Reds and deep purples, like mulberry fruit, and white and cream, like mulberry flowers. Greens as needed. I'm thinking mostly a pinky-red. If you look at the first image below, there are three mulberries in a line at the top left-- look at the one in the middle and/or the one under it (not in the line of three) for a good color reference.

Thigh holster: Knife. Hot. Io needs a knife under ly skirt because it’s what lu deserves. I'm thinking either a faux leather, because that's what I use for part of Remus's dress, or strap made of several green fabrics woven together, to give it a homemade vibe, like Io made it laself. And it will be accessible via... :

Skirt shape: Petals. The first idea I had was a petunia, to make a solid skirt with five panels, each which would have a scalloped edge to create the shape of the flower, like these:

Skirt, cont.: But after realizing that lu would need access to a thigh holster for ly knife, I started to think about how to access that in skirt form. One idea is to make the skirt of separate, finished panels that can be easily reached between. One construction idea for the original paneled skirt idea was to make it as several strips with a waistband that tied around. So now the idea is to use that method, but with deconstructed panels to give a very open skirt but keep with the theme of easily removable. Also imagine all the different panels flaring out when you spin!

Fabric: After Mulberry was posted, we learned more about how Io dresses (or, uh, doesn't), so I started thinking more about the fabric type. I want to balance the surreal (shiny fabrics making a less natural looking appearance, nodding to fae) and the mundane (Io being a less powerful nymph, as opposed to powerful gentry). I'm a little at an impasse for what fabric to use. I love organzas (even though they're mean to me) (it's fine, everything's fine), and I think using a mix of organza and a very light-grade tulle would make an interesting texture for this dress.

Sleeves: Again, this depends on the fabric type, but imagine big billowing sleeves of a transparent mesh fabric with discrete embroidery of mulberry themed elements. Thinking the sleeves will be completely off the shoulder, maybe made with casing and a ribbon tie to keep them at the top of the arm.

Bodice: Also going back to Io's tendency to dress less, using a knit fabric which matches skin tone is one option for the body potion, OR, hear me out, a gentle mesh (that doesn't set off sensory hell!) with exposed boning to make a corset-like top! Then, referencing this post, flower or similar motifs sewn into to chest piece. Another part I'll add is an open back element, with some sort of lacing. This works great for me, because zippers and I are reluctant allies at best.

Overall vibes: Basically, I want this to look like a flower nymph ballet costume, because how fucking cool would that be? Here are some images with elements of the silhouette I'm thinking of:

#dress design #love and other fairytales line #love and other fairytales #cosplay #original character #not my original character #tulipscomeinallsortsofcolors #io #laoft io

[thefirstknife]

i unironically hope Eris stays in her Hive form at least physically bc im already loving how both her & Immaru are pointing out Ikora's (and humanity's) inherent dehumanization of the Hive.

Eris being all "If this form does not leave will you still view me as a friend?"

Immaru when asked where the Experiment Subjects come from and responding with "Don't act like you care."

Honestly, it's so good. I really love the Eris stuff and some of these questions being posed. A lot of people react negatively to Eris doing this, forgetting that Eris has already been part-Hive for a long time. She was just hiding it behind the eye cover.

Technically, nothing inherently changed about Eris; she just embraced that part of her. And that's super important for her arc I think because she's been on a journey of accepting her trauma and her losses for a very long time. We helped her face her fears and traumas in Shadowkeep and she came out of it victorious. And the story never treated it as her traumas being gone; she still has them, but she has the means to tackle them and handle them and live with them. Since we helped her, she became more open and more involved with what we do to save our home, even if it meant tackling dangerous things.

And the thing is, now that her traumas cannot be exploited by Darkness anymore, she's capable of involving herself in these things, knowing that she has friends to fall back to and a support system and better mental fortitude. We've seen it through her endurance beneath the Pyramid on Io, and her grasp of stasis, and her dealing with the Crown of Sorrow and egregore and the Lunar Pyramid nightmares. And now with her embracing her Hive self. It doesn't change anything about her, but people prefer when she hides it so they don't have to see it. And she knows it (Sororicide lore book, page 1):

It's a perfect example of how we inherently view the Hive as untrustworthy. Obviously, there are good reasons for it! The Hive have caused immense pain and trauma to pretty much everyone in the universe, Eris included. It must take an incredible strength of character to embrace the fact that you're physically half-Hive, creatures that traumatised you in the first place. No one else has dealt with anything similar so naturally they're afraid for Eris. But I believe in her strength. And so does Drifter and Drifter is never wrong:

He'd read the reports. He saw the theories on VanNet. He didn't trust them. He trusted her.

There's a cutscene that people skip and can cause people not to see it, I recommend replaying the thing on a different character or seeing it online, but it shows Eris taking off her bandage in front of us:

It's such a powerful image to me. A symbol of her taking off her mask. Not pretending to be the same as us anymore. Because she isn't! The Hive are a part of her and have been for centuries. And she's always been in control. Our mistrust has always hurt her, but before this, we could act with pity towards her. Now that she's fully in Hive form, people's perception of her changed, for really no good reason other than prejudice. She is still Eris.

I definitely think that eventually we will have to reconcile with the idea of the Hive not being inherently evil in totality as a whole group of people. Obviously this is going to be difficult, especially when their leaders act the way they do, but eventually I do believe we will have to accept some of them, even if it's only Eris for a start.

#destiny 2 #destiny 2 spoilers #season of the witch #season of the witch spoilers #eris #immaru #hive #ask #long post #there's just something about like. eris embracing her full self that's so incredibly powerful to me #and that the way we tolerated her before was steeped in the whole. 'as long as you're sufficiently similar to us you're fine' vibe #but she isn't. fundamentally she has been changed to her core and she kept it hidden #we could only see the light of her third eye and even that made people suspicious of her just based on her physical appearance #but beneath that bandage has always been Hive eyes #the hive killed her and the hive saved her. i can't even begin to imagine what kind of complex emotions that would bring her

[dolce-fiore]

⠀ ⠀ ⠀𝐵𝑢𝑜𝑛 𝑐𝑜𝑚𝑝𝑙𝑒𝑎𝑛𝑛𝑜, 𝑎𝑚𝑜𝑟𝑒 𝑑𝑒𝑙𝑙𝑎 𝑚𝑖𝑎 𝑣𝑖𝑡𝑎.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀♚

⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀Grateful.

Oggi è un giorno speciale. La persona più preziosa della mia vita è nata 34 anni fa e non potrei essere più grata di poter trascorrere questo giorno speciale con te, @brutalcharm. I can hardly express how grateful I am that our paths have crossed and that I am able to experience you, your love and this special day with you. I wish that all your dreams come true. Every dream that I am allowed to share with you. Each of these dreams is also mine, and I want to fulfill not only them, but above all, you.

I have never experienced a love like ours. A love that shows unbridled passion, seeking and finding in each other, trying to understand each other, even if it is not that easy sometimes, openness. A love in which we help each other to accept ourselves, in which we learn to love our dark and light sides, our inner devil and inner angel, equally. A love in which we reach out to each other and don't let go, in which we challenge us and try to get the best out of each other with the greatest love we can give. Even while arguing and trying to kill the other one, we do it passionately, because our love is deeper than every ocean.

I love you for you. For everything you were, you are and you are becoming. Past, present and future. Being a part of it, seeing you grow, seeing you allow your feelings, learning to accept yourself, letting go in my presence and letting me participate in your world and your life is the most beautiful thing I can experience. Next to be able to grow our little baby in my belly. Thank you for your patience, thank you for listening to me and accepting me the way I am. Thank you for helping me find myself and thank you that I will experience you being a papai to our little ervilha. It is an honor to watch you as a father. You have such love and care for your children that it makes my heart explode into a thousand pieces everytime I am around you and them. Thank you for allowing me to be a part of not only your life, but also theirs. You are incredibly strong, tesoro mio. Definitely stronger than you think you are. You deserve the world and I want to show it to you every single day. You are imperfect perfect. Ervilha and I are absolutely proud of everything you are.

But most of all: Thank you for loving me. It is not a secret that I love staring at you, expecially while I listen to you talk. You change me by allowing me to be who I want to be with you. I enjoy you, your world view, your passions, your anger, your tenderness, your wildness, your good-natured heart, your being. You are the most incredible person to me and you have no idea how much I admire you, Jovan. Today we are going to celebrate another year of you being the most genuine smartass that is wandering around on this planet. Today it is all about you. Well, in my life everyday is all about you.

Non vedo l'ora di sposarti e di far parte del tuo per sempre. Expecially spending every night and day in your arms. My love for you is endless. You will always have my heart. Ti sento più profondamente di quanto gli altri possano comprendere e non intendo lasciarti andare nemmeno per un secondo. Tu mi appartieni, così come io appartengo a te. Ti amo con tutto il mio cuore e molto di più.

Only yours, forever. I love you more than life.

♛ Your fiancée, Eloise.

#𝐽𝑂𝑉𝐴𝑁 ⠀ ⠀─ la mia aria da respirare

[dejadoodles-101]

✨INTRODUCTORY POST✨

Hey yall! I’m gonna go ahead and finally introduce myself on here since a lot of you don’t really know who I am. So allow me to introduce myself! 💕

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🪷My real name is Rhiannon, but that’s not a very good name so just call me Deja :)) (I have other nicknames too such as Rhi, Rhia, Jade and etc)

🪐I am an Aries ♈️ My bday is March 27 and I’m currently 22 years young but turning 23 soon!

🍄My pronouns are she/her/hers

❤️My sexuality is heterosexual (straight) as of for right now. Having some thoughts about becoming bisexual

🪻Introvert (INFJ-T)

🎨I am an artist. I sketch, digitally draw and paint on canvases sometimes.

🇺🇸 I live somewhere in America.

☘️ I’m also Irish-American.

💜 My favorite color is purple, but I also love blue, green, pink, black, red, gold and silver. And other variants of those colors

🖤I am considered as a goth, emo, and scene person. I’m also an aesthetic kind of person. (I’m into a lot of things lmao)

🧁 I really like sweets~ <3 (and other foods too)

🌴 I love the warm weather

😎 I guess I’m also considered to be cool lol

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What I’ll mostly be posting on here is art, memes, fanfics, incorrect quotes and etc. The fandoms I’m in are The Owl House, Amphibia, Helluva Boss, Inside Out, Futurama, Big Hero 6 and etc. Expect a ton of TOH and IO art cuz that’s what I’m really into right now lmao 😂

Here’s a list of other things I’m also into:

•Goth/emo/scene stuff

•Cosmology/astronomy

•Nature

•Plants

•Jewelry/crystals/rocks/gems and such

•Dream/weird core

•Witchy stuff

•Rock music as well as pop, heavy metal, punk, dubstep and etc

•Creepy things

•Aesthetic stuff

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-Do I do art requests, commissions, trades or whatever? All of those are currently closed. I DO NOT do art commissions because I don’t have access to do any of that. I probably will open art requests at some point as well as trades, but I’m just SUPER busy with art that I still need to get done.

-Am I LGBTQ+ friendly? HELL YEAH 🏳️‍🌈⚧️🏳️‍⚧️ I am an ally and I don’t care if you’re bisexual, pan, lesbian, gay or whatever! Just be yourself and don’t give a shit abt what anyone else says!

-Can minors interact with me? That really depends on the age. I am an adult and still a stranger here so I think I really prefer if ppl around 16+ can talk to me. I’m just kinda uncomfortable with the fact that there are 13-14 year olds on here and I’m like 10 years over those ages. If you are under 16 and wanna be my friend, I guess I’m okay with that but please just remember that I am an adult and just please be careful :) I am a nice person though!

-Other socials? I have 2 Instagram accounts. One of them is MissBigHero6 (my private account; the username will be changing soon tho) and the other is DejaDoodles101 (my art account). I have a DeviantArt (DejaDoodles101). I also have a discord account and that is under the name of Ariezthetic.

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-I am obsessed with a ton of characters such as Emperor Belos and The Collector (TOH), Loona and Verosika Mayday (Helluva Boss), Anxiety and Envy (Inside Out), and many more lmao. Btw I’m a HUGE Belos simp 🤭

-My favorite ships are Lumity, Raeda, Huntlow, Gustholomule, Veesha and Belrin (my OC Erin x Belos, (TOH) Joy x Sadness, Disgust x Anger and Anxiety x Ennui (Inside Out) Millie x Moxxie (Helluva Boss)

-I have a ton of OCs and I can’t wait for you guys to meet them! Both original characters and from shows and movies I watch!

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Kinda running low on other things to say abt myself so I’ll probably just stop here for now. I’ll try to add more at some point!

Go ahead and follow me if you’d like! Def need more followers and friends on here cuz I’m such a loner lmao 😅 Also looking forward to meeting you all! 🩷

#intro post #self introduction #the owl house #inside out #helluva boss #amphibia

[ahungeringknife]

It Compels Me

@flowers-of-io

Shipping your OC with your friend's OC is like the height of friendship to me. Like sorry we're friend married now you're never getting rid of me. All I'm thinking about is our two stupid Acolyte boyfriends.

=====+=====

Dornuk always came up with grand excuses why he went to the Temple of the Navigator. But really his superiors didn't actually care. They didn't even care if he showed up for muster, just assumed he was dead unless a Wizard was doing a census. Since Savathun's death and the purging of the Entity in the Pyramid Guardians didn't come around in such great numbers. The Throne World was almost safe. Or about as safe as any Hive space could be.

He scurried through the corridors that led to the chewed up land to the Temple of the Navigator. More duty bound acolytes patrolled here with a cache of thrall. Up on the raised platform Kogrur and Rardux the Knight lieutenants that managed the Guard here were talking between themselves casually. Dornuk knew they saw him but they paid him no mind as he went into the Temple, taking the stairs like a normal person. Only the Lightbearer Skye was down here in the temple main, talking with her Ghost animatedly.

"Who goes," Skye called when Dornuk entered the main worship hall with the statue of Oryx slaying Akka.

"Dornuk," he said, hanging back in the stairway briefly, shyly. Mandy peered out of his side pouch at Skye and Abyss.

"Little moth's friend. You're allowed," Skye said, waving at him dismissively. Dornuk bobbed his head in a slight bow and scurried along the wall out of the main atrium. Skye ignored him, going back to talking to Abyss.

Dornuk went down the hallway to Alak Hul's private quarters. He was still stunned he just got to go there. Mandy floated out of the pouch to fly ahead of him, waiting impatiently at the door for him. She called Nakshatra and the ghost of Alak Hul came to let them in, unlocking the door for Dornuk to push open.

Alak Hul wasn't in the main room when he came in. There weren't many places he could hide. But Dornuk wasn't concerned with Alak Hul. He entered the sitting parlor with its comfortable seating and several boxes of strange City and Hive toys. Gup was sitting on one of the lounges on his human made hand tablet. Pockit. That was what Gup said they were called.

"Xolkûn," Dornuk said in greeting, proper despite himself.

Gup perked up and turned around. "Dornuk! And uhg, stop calling me Xolkûn. Only my mom calls me Xolkûn, and that's only when I'm in trouble," he groaned.

"But Xolkûn is your name," Dornuk said. But he also preferred it to Gup. It suited him. He didn't want to admit how much he liked the name. It was both a deeply powerful name and yet so kind, 'the unhungry one'. Xolkûn never knew the bite of your worm's desire to feed, to grow. He also never knew the fear of your worm devouring you if you failed to feed it.

"Yeah but you're my friend! And all my friends call me Gup," Gup said.

"I suppose I can make an exception," Dornuk said haughtily and Gup giggled as Dornuk joined him on the lounge. Gup didn't look like normal Hive and Dornuk was so curious about it. He had a fairly standard looking body for an Acolyte, like Dornuk, but parts of him sported tufts of down like a moth's. His entire head except for some strangely shaped horns was covered in this fluff so you couldn't see any feature of his face except for his three glowing eyes. Dornuk privately thought Gup had fluff in all the 'correct' places one would want fluff.

"How gracious," Gup said.

"You don't have to use your fake voice you know," he reminded Gup.

"It's fine," Gup said. Such a shame. Gup's natural voice was surprisingly deep. Or maybe it shouldn't be surprising. It was very... compelling. Because Dornuk refused to call it attractive. Because Dornuk refused to admit anything about Gup, the weirdo Hive with a Guardian mom, was attractive.

"What are you looking at?" Dornuk asked, leaning in close.

"Mom finally let me have a GnL account on my pockit. I was watching some clips," and he showed Dornuk, turning the pockit to him. Dornuk still had to get close. Which was the point. Dornuk couldn't just ask for attention or by the Deep cuddles but he could position himself into that situation. Gup was an overly affectionate sort though and didn't mind Dornuk getting in close.

He was also smart enough not to mention when Dornuk pressed against his side and fluff and just kept talking about the silly videos he was showing Dornuk. And they were pretty silly even if they were weird human, Guardian, and Eliksni videos. Dornuk even laughed! Dornuk didn't have a lot to laugh about often but he felt comfortable and safe with Gup enough to do so.

Dornuk wasn't quite insightful enough to register when Gup's arm curled around him, holding Dornuk against his side as they watched the videos. He was just enjoying himself acting like he wasn't totally snuggling up against Gup's mothy fluff.

#writeblr #fanfiction #destiny #destiny 2 #destiny the game #lucent hive #destiny hive #Gup #Dornuk