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#I love the docent :)
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I want to be on my lovey dovey bullshit
I want to be ridiculous and grandiose and romantic
Ughhhhhhhhhhhh
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I am on vacation with my best friend and her family, please join me in praying I can fake something approaching Normal for three days
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kraniumet · 1 year
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developing a new nemesis. whump bloggers.
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corvidaedream · 2 years
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all us interns from different departments took a walking tour of the cemetery highlights today and when we got to isabella's tomb i was so excited and then the docent was like "this one gets a lot of attention because she's sort of an obsession among certain kinds of people for some reason" and I was like. called the fuck out. but also for some reason??? that reason is that she was interesting and funny, fuck off
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hamletthedane · 2 months
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I was meeting a client at a famous museum’s lounge for lunch (fancy, I know) and had an hour to kill afterwards so I joined the first random docent tour I could find. The woman who took us around was a great-grandmother from the Bronx “back when that was nothing to brag about” and she was doing a talk on alternative mediums within art.
What I thought that meant: telling us about unique sculpture materials and paint mixtures.
What that actually meant: an 84yo woman gingerly holding a beautifully beaded and embroidered dress (apparently from Ukraine and at least 200 years old) and, with tears in her eyes, showing how each individual thread was spun by hand and weaved into place on a cottage floor loom, with bright blue silk embroidery thread and hand-blown beads intricately piercing the work of other labor for days upon days, as the labor of a dozen talented people came together to make something so beautiful for a village girl’s wedding day.
What it also meant: in 1948, a young girl lived in a cramped tenement-like third floor apartment in Manhattan, with a father who had just joined them after not having been allowed to escape through Poland with his pregnant wife nine years earlier. She sits in her father’s lap and watches with wide, quiet eyes as her mother’s deft hands fly across fabric with bright blue silk thread (echoing hands from over a century years earlier). Thread that her mother had salvaged from white embroidery scraps at the tailor’s shop where she worked and spent the last few days carefully dying in the kitchen sink and drying on the roof.
The dress is in the traditional Hungarian fashion and is folded across her mother’s lap: her mother doesn’t had a pattern, but she doesn’t need one to make her daughter’s dress for the fifth grade dance. The dress would end up differing significantly from the pure white, petticoated first communion dresses worn by her daughter’s majority-Catholic classmates, but the young girl would love it all the more for its uniqueness and bright blue thread.
And now, that same young girl (and maybe also the villager from 19th century Ukraine) stands in front of us, trying not to clutch the old fabric too hard as her voice shakes with the emotion of all the love and humanity that is poured into the labor of art. The village girl and the girl in the Bronx were very different people: different centuries, different religions, different ages, and different continents. But the love in the stitches and beads on their dresses was the same. And she tells us that when we look at the labor of art, we don’t just see the work to create that piece - we see the labor of our own creations and the creations of others for us, and the value in something so seemingly frivolous.
But, maybe more importantly, she says that we only admire this piece in a museum because it happened to survive the love of the wearer and those who owned it afterwards, but there have been quite literally billions of small, quiet works of art in billions of small, quiet homes all over the world, for millennia. That your grandmother’s quilt is used as a picnic blanket just as Van Gogh’s works hung in his poor friends’ hallways. That your father’s hand-painted model plane sets are displayed in your parents’ livingroom as Grecian vases are displayed in museums. That your older sister’s engineering drawings in a steady, fine-lined hand are akin to Da Vinci’s scribbles of flying machines.
I don’t think there’s any dramatic conclusions to be drawn from these thoughts - they’ve been echoed by thousands of other people across the centuries. However, if you ever feel bad for spending all of your time sewing, knitting, drawing, building lego sets, or whatever else - especially if you feel like you have to somehow monetize or show off your work online to justify your labor - please know that there’s an 84yo museum docent in the Bronx who would cry simply at the thought of you spending so much effort to quietly create something that’s beautiful to you.
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notdeadyetnatural · 2 years
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Me tearing up watching the series finale of a show: 😢🥺😢🥺😢
Lord Huron ends of the earth starts playing:
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gallusrostromegalus · 8 months
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On God I was working on the AEIWAM Outline today but I also got "The AEIWAM cast, post-fic, go to the Aquarium" brainrot so have this:
It kicks off with Retsu seeing Kenpachi deep in thought for once and asking him what he's mulling over and after a moment he asks: "Are there zoos for fish?" "...Pardon?" "There are lotsa fish," he reasons, "-at least as many as there are land animals, but they're all really hard to see, because they're in the water." Retsu considers him for a moment before gently asking "Do you mean The Aquarium?" "The what?"
Retsu, texting Ichigo in the Gotei-13 Groupchat at 2AM: I need you to acquire tickets and human chaperones for a group field trip to The Aquarium Ichigo, who fears her above everyone else in soul society: Yes, Captain. Retsu: If it was just the SWA I'd only ask for tickets but you know what The Lads are like. Ichigo: Unfortunately, Yes. Ichigo: I'll bring the first aid kit, zip ties, duct tape and candy. Retsu: Good man.
Upon Arrival, Kenpachi has already been lectured about "You ARE NOT ALLOWED to fight and/or eat the fish, no matter how annoying and/or delicious they look
Turns out they were lecturing the wrong guy because it's Byakuya that develops a personal rivalry with a grouper ("It's smug expression disgusts me." "Captain that is a FISH.") and has to be talked out of climbing into the tank to fight it
after that he has to hold hands with Rukia or Renji.
Rukia discovers Sea Bunnies and ends up crying about them.
Yachiru gets to see them feeding the Piranha and it's a Spiritual Experience for her.
Later, she gets to see them feed the sharks and it's an EVEN BETTER spiritual Experience.
Hitsugaya learns Penguins are real and not just 'made up for christmas, like the flying reindeer and the guy with the suspect toy charity'.
Momo lights into him about "Penguins are my favorite animal, they've been my favorite animal for decades YOU THOUGHT THEY WERE FAKE?" Hitsugaya: "YOU ALSO USED TO LIKE UNICORNS!" Momo: "THOSE ARE ALSO REAL!" Orihime: "They are?" Momo: "...I keep forgetting they're extinct in the living world."
Tousen gets to experience the Touch Pool and the docents realize what's up so they start pulling out the cool stuff like sea hares and moray eels because he's an adult that can be trusted to pet things gently.
When the group comes back to collect him the staff is letting him hand feed a Pacific Red Octopus, and Yachiru immediately demands she be allowed to as well.
Retsu quietly releases Minazuki into the stingray touch pool so she can "go play with her cousins :)"
Kenpachi and Yamamoto asking "Can we eat it?" about every. single. animal.
The extremely dedicated docent that is *just* Psychic enough to know something is up with this group of chucklefucks so they're following them through the aquarium, but is also genuinely having fun answering every fucking insane question these guys ask.
Yoruichi was not anticipating there to be Tigers at the aquarium (they ARE semi-aquatic and part of a larger exhibit on Tropical Riparian Ecosystems) and she is SUPER NOT JEALOUS of how much Urahara and Baby Labcat like them.
There is also an exhibit with an Anaconda that the docent finds Rangiku staring at with a forlorn expression. Docent: "It's okay, not everyone is a fan of snakes." Rangiku: "What? Oh, no, I love snakes. They just also remind me of my Ex." Docent: *WomanTryingToDoMath.Meme* Docent: *Considers the size of the Anaconda* Docent: "...Ah. Yeah, I'd miss a man like that too."
Renji, Ichigo and Ikkaku going "Its YOU!" to each other over every single red, orange or round creature.
Kenpachi going "IT ME!!" about the black urchins before anyone can get him though.
Shunsui pointing at the sea otters that are holding hands and declaring, tears in his eyes "Jushiro! It's US!" Ukitake then prompty ruins the moment by telling Shunsui Fun Facts about Sea Otters like how they're basically giant marine weasels that will absolutely drown each other's young and maul anyone dumb enough to touch one.
The Dolphins all love Komamura and he is just a little bit smug about this.
Relatedly, not sure if its funnier for Komamura to show up in a Human Gigai, or as Tousen's "Service Dog"
Human Gigai: -Komamura is weirdly stony-faced and sort of intimidating and everyone thinks he's stressed out but really he's used to making micro-expressions and gesturing with his ears so he sorta just forgot how to move his face. -Still Nine and a Half feet tall and smacking his head on Everything
Service Dog: -"He's uh. A Shepherd. Mix." Ichigo says to the aforementioned Docent about what is very obviously a Bigass Timber Wolf. -Sajin doesn't give a rat's ass about his cover and keeps talking to Tousen while in dog form. If anyone looks at him funny he makes direct eye contact and says "Woof. Bark."
Yamamoto vs. Escalator. Catastrophic Beard Incident. 2 injured, 16 Dead but they were like that already.
Ukitake, Retsu, and Tama all Not Shutting Up With Facts About Every Fish Ever because they all share a Special Interest.
They briefly lose Byakuya in the Jellyfish exhibit because Rukia and Renji both thought the other one was holding Byakuya's hand and he is *enchanted* by the wall-sized tank of Moon Jellies.
Ikkaku attempting to talk Yachiru out of getting the ridiculously oversized Great White Shark plushie only for Zaraki to get it for both of them instead.
Everyone had a great time and is Very Tired and so they don't realize anything is amiss until they get back to Ichigo's place and the nightly news comes on. "Hey ichigo?" Yuzu calls. "Why is Ms. Unohana on TV?" The news has a story with a still image of Retsu on CCTV and "Authorities are looking for this woman who somehow ADDED a fully intact and highly venomous short-tailed stingray to the aquarium's touch pool" "OH MY GOD WE FORGOT MINAZUKI!"
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writingwhileblvck · 2 months
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So my birthday was last Friday and I went to the museum right? While I was there, there was this live animal presentation. The were a lot of people there in this small space all trying to see the animal, and that's when I had a really funny and cute thought.
So we can all agree the Kirishima is a big boy right? Real tall and real wide. That being said, I just know that in situations like this when there is a lot of people trying to see something, if Kirishima can't find a seat, he will sit of the floor.
And it docent matter where he is. He knows that he is tall and people can't really see around him. So he will sit on the floor so others can see. Because he'll be able to see regaurdless so he dosent mind at all.
And in this particular situation with the museum, there was also a lot of kids around, so he will do this to make himself smaller cause he's afraid he'll scare the kids!!!!!!!!!!!! HELLO??? Why he thinks this, who knows because kids LOVE him, but I digress. I can just see Kiri criss cross applesauce on the floor, surrounded by kids, watching the presenter talk about Opossums or some shit.
Little kids will walk passed him and just stare because hello? Big burly man with red hair and sharp teeth just in the middle of the floor, they're confused, Bewildered some would say. And Kiri will just smile and wave. He's just happy to be there fr.
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theminecraftbox · 4 months
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hi my discourse is that I actually fucking loved Eret's fake history museum and historical lies. There's literally nothing funnier than someone who was there for a lot of history describing it completely incorrectly. "Bad amateur historian" is a fantastic character idea and I wish it'd gone somewhere.
strongly agree / agree / ambivalent / disagree / strongly disagree / don't care whatsoever
in some respects I agree with you completely; bad amateur historian is a concept that does indeed slap, and on top of that, I got quite a lot of mileage out of the concept of c!Dream giving docent tours of a recreation of the site of his torture.
however, I think the creator intention--which was to be a GOOD amateur historian--pushes too often and too onerously into the final product for any of the execution to land particularly well, and because of this, I'm not convinced there truly exists a version of eret's lore where it comes off effectively.
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a-dinosaur-a-day · 10 months
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As a former human child I’ve always wanted to know: how exactly does one become a paleontologist?
okay there are lots of ways. this is my way
have parents that, while poor, value education and learning
have significantly older siblings that do not care about appropriateness for children in terms of television content
bc of b, see jurassic park as an infant
bc of that, and land before time, fall in love with dinosaurs
be neurodivergent
become OBSESSED with dinosaurs
bc of a, have parents encourage this and rent me all the documentaries
learn everything about dinosaurs
when asked "why do you like them" at age 5, answer "because their evolution is cool"
survive elementary school
survive middle school
do a lot of science stuff in school
do science competitions in high school
remain obsessed with dinosaurs/birds and other reptiles and prehistoric life
survive high school
go to college
major in biology
do research in evolution and the cambrian explosion
graduate
go to graduate school to become an evolutionary developmental biologist because your parents wanted you to do genetics bc they thought it had a better chance of me getting a job
be miserable during that program
only derive joy from docenting at the field museum and going to dino science conferences
cut out with a masters' when you realize you can't take it anymore
ponder being a rabbi for a while bc maybe you're not cut out for science
go to a dino conference online and actually network with a paleontologist who wants students
interview with him and find he has a lot of research interests in common with you
apply to the school, get accepted
move across the fucking country (chicago -> new mexico)
work hard because this is your second chance and you have *meds* now
help describe a bird in the first year
have a really holistic and ambitious thesis project idea
paleontologist now, I guess
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museum-spaces · 1 year
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Almost certainly a silly question but: is it weird to go to museums alone? I'm in my late 20s living in a big city with real museums for the first time. the only time I've ever been to one is on vacation with family as a teen and when visiting a partner in a europe. I don't really know anyone here yet but I really want to see some dinosaur bones and I'm not sure i want to wait around until I've made a friend to go look at them with.
Is it unusual to see an adult alone at a museum? Should I just go? Is it possible to make friends while looking at dinosaur bones? Is there museum etiquette about this? Is there other non-obvious museum etiquette someone who grew up in the wilds of northern Canada might not know???
Anon, no it is not weird at all.
In fact, you could go and make friends there totally either by talking to docents - the workers in the gallery space - or other guests because guess what, you ALL care about dinosaur bones.
Basic museum etiquette is this, and even these vary depending on where you are
Pay to enter - either buy a ticket or make a donation. if it is by donation and you don't have the funds, go in anyway.
match the volume of the museum - if it's quiet keep your voice to a conversational level, if its loud be loud if you want to.
DO NOT TOUCH unless it explicitly says you can touch, then go hog wild.
Do not get into conspiracy arguments even for fun with the staff - we have heard it all.
have fun.
AND THATS IT. Depending on the museum they may even have social meet-up events for young people or classes or lectures that you could attend with meet-and-greets afterwards for social interaction.
If its dinos I can guess at the museum/province. They'll love your enthusiasm even if it is quiet.
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notbecauseofvictories · 6 months
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When I was biking back through Rosehill Cemetery, I crossed paths with walkers and joggers, more than one family member driving in to place flowers or tend to someone's grave, a full funeral party composed almost entirely of shining antique cars, and one tour group (I recognized the docent, I've taken tours with him before) politely chuckling at the jokes of someone who must have been the cemetery director---he was dressed in a long black coat, and suggesting that "if you or someone you love is looking for a final resting place..."
There's just something poetic about cemeteries, especially when they so visibly sit at the crossroads like that. They become places not just where the living remember and mourn the dead, but places of many uses (greenspace, amenity, historical site) and alive, despite their ostensible purpose.
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emikau1itz · 4 months
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Hello!! I saw that your requests are open and I figured I'd drop in and ask!! Can I get a fluffy fic with Georg?? Maybe him returning to the reader unannounced after a long time away, like on tour and the surprise and excitement of having your loved one back in your arms??? Sorry if this request makes 0 sense, english is my first language and I'm just really bad at writing things down.
Ty Anon for the request, this is such a cute idea!!
Drop more requests!!
Summary- Y/n has not seen Georg in almost a month, it's driving her CRAZY. Until she gets a knock at her door.
Warnings- None just fluff!!
Im here now- Georg Listing
You sat on your L shaped couch, the city lights lighting up the room through the large windows. You lived in a Loft apartment in the city, it was pretty spacious for a loft apartment. You were snuggled up on the couch, a big woven blanket ontop of your small frame, Some random Netflix movie playing on the wall mounted tv, it was a big tv. It was about 11oclock at night, you would usually get a goodnight text from Georg but you didn't, you brushed it off thinking he just fell asleep. Until you heard a soft knock at the door. You practically rolled off the couch, you went to the door and opened it. Your jaw dropped, It was Georg. You let out a squeal and jumped up to hug him. He picked you up off the floor, your legs wrapped around his waist while he held your lower back. "Surprise schatzi." he said before placing a kiss on your forehead. He stepped inside still carrying you, he placed you back onto your feet. "How did you even get here, I thought you were still on tour?" You asked in shock. "Well, some shows got canceled and we have a week off, so I decided to come and see you." He said with a big grin on his face.
-Little time skip-
You're on the couch, laying on Georgs chest while a movie is playing. He plays with your hair softly, Causing your body to completely melt into his. "You don't know how much Ive missed you, Schätzchen. Tour without you is so difficult." He said looking down at you, still lying on his chest. "Mmh baby, I've missed you more. It's so lonely here without you." He grinned before grabbing my chin softly to kiss my lips. You immediately kiss him back before lying back onto his chest. Some time passes, you fall asleep on his chest. For awhile he docent notice but when the movie ends he looks down at you. He is in awe. You look so peaceful sleeping on his chest. He smiles before kissing the top of your head.
"Schlaf schön mein Schatz" He says before drifting off to sleep, holding you in his arms.
Sorry if there is spelling or grammatical mistakes!
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ahedderick · 7 months
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Mosaic
Years ago I painted a winter landscape, a scene from out at the end of the pasture with really nice setting sunlight.
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I sent an image to my brother, who is a math professor and very computer-ish. He sent back this:
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I didn't even recognize it at first . . and then HEY! I figured out what he had done. LOVE it!! Also made me realize that the color palette for the painting is all metallic; gold, silver, and dark/coppery/bronze.
So that image has been sitting in the back of my head for years, now, waiting for the right moment to create problems.
Yesterday I was at a small, local museum being docent on a day when nobody was attending. I spent hours sitting alone, and took a quilting book off the shelf to pass the time. Terrible idea. Looking at the quilt patterns got me thinking about mosaics, then photo mosaics, then !!
I could turn a photo into a mosaic on the computer, then cut out fabric pieces and make a quilt with that image. Brilliant!!
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I absolutely do not have time to do this. But. Someday I will. Solemn vow, and all that.
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cuddl3s4shur1 · 1 year
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Museum Day
Paring:Shuri x Museum Docent Y/n
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Summary , As shuri needed to take a break from her lab work riri would take her out to art museum where she would fall in love with the docent
Authors Note: I’m just going to publish this so y’all don’t think about my drug dealer riri story or my Producer Shuri story 😄. Anyways enjoy this fluff if I do make a part 2 it’s going to be smut in a museum
Taglist : @inmyheadimobsessed @saintwrld @locoforshuri @taiiunknown @atssukoo @niaalove @malltake12 @writesbyriri @secretgyals
- I don’t remember anyone else sorry 😞
Sneak Peek 🫣: She comes out in a beautiful yet simple outfit. The young lady would catch the princess’s attention quick
♡ ♡
Amazed
That’s how shuri felt when she first saw you at the museum.
Riri had been practically begging shuri to come in Chicago so they can spend time together and mainly so shuri could get out the lab.
Recently riri had been seeing many advertisements and TikTok’s on a art museum in Chicago. Riri knew exactly where she was going to take shuri . She knew where would most likely enjoy the art sense she loves looking at new things .
“Bro your going to love this activity I planned out for you shuri “ riri says as she smiles realizing they where getting closer and closer to the museum. “We’ll knowing you riri I probably am “ shuri says unfazed . “Actually where are we going “ shuri questions riri . “Don’t worry about that “ she says riri becomes more anxious as she gets to the musem .“Riri your scaring me “ shuri jokes to her . “Bro you’ll be fine okay “ as riri says that she parallel parks her car . “And just like that where here , isn’t that just nice “ she smiles and looks at shuri . “Yeah I guess it is “ shuri says being nonchalant about it . She looks out the car window and sees that it’s a musem.
“Ahh a museum is it “ shuri says creating a slight smile . “ intle… intle (Nice…Nice) “ shuri says softly. “I got us a docent because i thought that maybe they would help” riri says as she gets out the car . “Thanks “ shuri says as she also gets out also . They walk into the museum in sync and they look around. “This is ubuhle obuphefumlayo ( Breathtaking Beauty) “ shuri says as she looks around the museum .
Riri heads to the front desk so she could get the docent . “Hello I’m Riri Williams and online I asked for a docent by the name of Gabriel” riri asks being as polite as she could possibly be . “Ah , your docent is not here but I can get you another one to replace his absent , is that fine “ the lady ends with a question. “Actually yes that would be great “ riri smiles . “Y/n , come to the front desk “ the lady says on her walky talky. Soon enough a young lady that looked around Riri’s age would show up . She comes out in a beautiful yet simple outfit. The young lady would catch the princess’s attention quick . “You called me Janet “ she says calmly. “Oh yeah sense gab is out your going to have to fill in “ she says smiling and looking at y/n but than ending and looking back at riri. “Oh ok well that’s fine” the lady says she was unfazed and calm which already riri liked .
Riri looked back at shuri and waved her so she could come over and start the tour . Instantly shuri walks towards the group like something took over her body.
“Is everyone here “ y/n questions the two . “Yes “ shuri smile. “Oh well welcome to the musem , I’ll be your docent today you may call me y/n if you have any questions about the art work just ask me and I’ll answer the questions to best of my ability “ she says smiling .”I’m riri and this is my friend and this is are first time here “ riri says being anxious and excited . “Oh well I hope you enjoy the art work and me as your docent today “y/n says . “Oh don’t worry we will” riri jokes .
The lady’s would stop at each and every art work they saw . Y/n thought this was nice since most people just glance and find a new art work that interests them. Shuri loved the how y/n was so calm and friendly with them .
As the musem would come to and end shuri started to admire y/n more the only problem was shuri being bad at flirting , “well this looks like it’s the last art work in this gallery, I hope you enjoyed me as your docent and I hope you enjoyed each and every work you saw today “ the lady says as she looks at the two women . “Any questions or thoughts “ she says asking not thinking any thing of it . “Um I was wondering if you like to hang out later “ shuri says. “I mean I usually don't hang out with people from work but I can maybe make a change those rules for you “ she says winking at shuri . This causes shuri to be flustered . “ talk to me when I’m at the front desk and maybe we’ll make something work “ y/n flirts with shuri and walks away .
“She was definitely feeling you “ riri jokes to shuri. “She was “ shuri says to riri . “ shuri are you being fr she literally winked and damn near flirted with you on job “ riri says being un able to realize how shuri was so oblivious to see y/n flirt . “Shuri please don’t fumble the bag ok “ riri demands to her . “Ok I’ll try “ she says . “Give me a pen a paper “shuri demands . Riri looks through her purse and give it to her .
Shuri writes a note
‘Call me later +1 XXX-XXX-XXXX - xoxo your love shuri :)’ .
Shuri goes over to the desk and grabs y/n’s hand. She trails her hand down y/n’s arm to her where she places the note . She closes it at it gives it a kiss . “See you later usana” shuri smiles .
Y/n reads the note and when finished she puts it in her back pocket.
“Oh y/n finna get laid “ Janet smirks . “Shut up Janet “ y/n jokes . “Just saying “ Janet says .
Oh how you where wondering how this call would go
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