this is a poem i found in my drafts from like, months & months ago. i think it's pretty rad, lowk. it's about religious trauma, jsyk. like. caution & stuff, yfm
i close my eyes, i refuse to breathe. not because i refuse to rejoice his name and call out; more so i refuse to ignite the tears that flow to drown me underneath. like a fire; my tears spread out of my control. the dizziness taking over as the more i breathe gives them more spread throughout my body - turning and caving in within itself. "is this supposed to happen?" my thoughts would race, blurring out all visions and my ears deafening to any divinity that may be trying to help. i am too weak to run, lord. i am too tired to stand and walk on your side; love is a two way street, you have died for me, yet condemn me not for my lust yet for my love. lord, dearest lord i wish to love you. i wish to welcome you into my heart; to be welcomed into your kingdom, but if you spit upon my identity in its entirety; why am i to blame? others can say, "i can give up my sinful lifestyle for him", father, for me it is no "lifestyle" it is my life. i cannot simply "give it up" father, the more i tried the more i became it. this is me, lord; why am i unacceptable? why am i disgusting and vile in your name and eyes. i try my best to surrender my life and heart to you yet devil can seem more welcoming than you at times. father i love you. i do not hate you, i do not wish to cast a stone upon you or cause you any harm. but i can't love you if even my repentance can't suffice for me simply being me.
i do not wish to have religious trauma anymore, my lord. i don't wish to be so doubtful. why must my punishment be my identity? why must i consistently live through mortality with pain, sorrow, and confusion, then strive to live in heaven where i fear i'll only be casted out and put in a stockade for ridicule and humiliation. father, i am lustful, i am slanderous, i am greedy and selfish, father i am a sinner, and i apologize heartfully for it, but i can't rightfully close my eyes and try to fight off my sins if it will be met with a turned face; with a scowl of disgust and disapproval when i try to be happy within my own skin. father i did not ask to be here; the same way i assume you did not ask to be hung. thank you, lord for saving my sins. for dying for me beyond anything i could've ever asked for. but i ask you this; why, why my beloved father, if you could die and go through years, eons of torture for my sins, why is my identity, any different? your love is unconditional, isn't it? what have i done that was so blasphemous to make this fail. i know what i did. i know what ive done. and for that i fully apologize, my dear lord. i beg at your feet; "please, oh please forgive me. please, father, i have lost so much time and time again, please don't cause me any more heartache; please, allow me to hear and see you, oh lord. please, allow me to be happy and fulfilled at some point in eternity. please, lay my worries and stress down to rest and assure me you love me despite all i am; please, i plead you, let us work." please, lord, accept me as i try and accept you as well. i know i cannot do this alone; so please, don't force me to walk alone now.
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Not AH supporters getting pissed that people are comparing her to Casey Anthony. And they can’t understand why anyone is compare the two, despite it being clear to anyone with two eyes and a brain.
Literally both are the same in every aspects but their respective cases: (1) both are privileged white women, (2) used sexual allegations and abuse to dispel bad attacks, are (3) complete narcasstic manipulators to everyone around them, and worst of all: (4) gets away with their respected crimes because sadly, our criminal justice system doesn’t prosecute pretty white women. 
That’s it. It doesn’t take a degree in rocket science to understand these basic concepts.
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loving the timeline i got to witness of:
-yahtzee reviews a game on zero punctuation
-in the course of the script he finds a reason to bring up ayn rand/atlus shrugged, mostly as a joke
-brings up ayn rand again as the closing punchline
-final credits message is "bioshock was a good game wasn't it"
-one day later the escapist uploads a new extra punctuation about why bioshock's opening is amazing
did you get bioshock on the brain by any chance, mr. croshaw?
idk what his schedule of making ZP/EP looks like, though i do suspect that EP might possibly be visually edited by someone else? i'm like 99% sure yahtz still does ZP by himself except to pass it by matt the editor for notes on where he should maybe swear less, but EP is kind of visually different (despite using yahtzee's art still) so maybe he just reads his script and lets matt do the visuals? idk. the man's busy he puts out 2 videos like every week, i wouldn't blame him
regardless, my point is that idk where in the process he decided to make an EP on bioshock, but the idea of him writing the sea of stars script, thinking about ayn rand a little too hard, and getting on a bioshock kick because of it is pretty damn funny
if he addresses this in the bioshock video i'm going to feel very silly but i was just taking a food + youtube break so i only watched the sea of stars review for now
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