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inkskinned · 11 months

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so one time i got bit by a brown recluse which is one of the only types of spider in my area that's actually dangerous and at first i didn't know what had happened to me, only that it was nasty. the swelling wasn't going down and the wound started to get ugly. i don't want to like get into the details because that's gross but it got to the point 2 weeks later that i was worried enough to go to the doctor, which i hate doing.

i am not afraid of spiders but other people are so i'd been covering it with this big ole square bandage (i needed more landscape coverage than a simple bandaid) and sat in the university medical waiting room, kicking my heels and playing BOTW. the nurse who admitted me was like, oh, we have got to get Tom to cover this one. she wrote spider bite under my ticket.

i waited in the near-empty building for like an hour and then nurse tom shows up in spiderman scrubs, out of breath. "sorry," he says, "i saw - your slip - and I had," he heaves in a breath, "to run home and. get. these scrubs. i literally. ran. felt like a job. for. spiderman."

i laugh. he puts his hands on his knees, thumbs-ups at me. fishes a pamphlet out from under his clipboard that basically says spiders can be scary but you don't need to be scared, there's very few dangerous spiders in new england. "honestly," he wheezes, "we probably don't need to get you into an exam room. just..." he waves his hand at the pamphlet, "read that."

i look down at my arm. then back at him in his scrubs. and then down at my arm. i like that he made an effort to make a joke, but now it does not feel like a good joke, because they are mistaking my calm for a lack of injury. "can i. like. at least show you the bite?"

he gives me kind of a weird look, which is fair, but then says. "if. i mean, if you have to."

i peel the bandage off. his face goes green.

"oh," he says.

"yeah, man."

"a... spider bit you?" his voice is high and tight and trembling. he backs up a few steps.

"i think a brown recluse," i offer. "i know it's nasty, sorry."

"excuse me for a moment." he looks over to the administering nurse on the other side of the small room. "i need to find someone else to take care of you."

the administering nurse smiles over to us with a degree of pleasure that is almost salivating. for a moment, like a window opening, i am briefly aware of what must be a psychic message floating amongst the in-between. her jaguar teeth all say this is like a party for me and i know exactly what i'm doing.

"oh no, tom," she says, grinning. "i gave her to you specifically."

#this is a real thing that happened #i then waited in an exam room for another hour until a doctor was similarly dismissive until he saw it #and then just gave me antibacterial cream which didn't help the swelling lol #it went away on its own like 4 weeks later #but that's like not the fun part of this story #i was just like. suddenly in the middle of someone else's work drama and GIRL #btw found this extremely funny #edit in the tags: oh ! i thought they were native to NE !!! ???? omg #i mean a real doctor really saw the wound and said ''brown recluse'' so i assumed he was right i never googled it #i lived on a mattress on the floor in a house of people who were always travelling #so like i guess it could have been ANY spider???#omg.....#the way this rocked my whole world

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forgettable-au · 3 months

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What do we think? I think he's like the coolest scientist to ever science

HEY HAPPY 2000 FOLLOWERS‼️HOW DID THAT HAPPEN SO QUICK?????

I'm genuinely so shocked about that I'm so so glad you're all enjoying this AU so far hehehe:D

Also I just made the 1000 followers celebration post like a month ago or something??wow

Here's the guy ‼️‼️ I wanted to practice drawing him quickly and in different poses. I think I achieved that, all this was made with just the lasso fill tool it was soooo fun and I loved not being worried about details just SHAPE

ALL SHAPE (and colors)

#I AM SO GLAD I HAD THIS DRAWING SAVED ON MY PHONE ALREADY #I wanted to make a proper 2000 followers celebration drawing but got to 2000 too fast and didn't get the chance #so I'm just using this one drawing because I think it looks cool #he's so fun to draw #sometimes #sometimes he's so so hard to draw #especially from behind ahskajsskjs #man I thought about his design so much while making him #cyan/aqua/light blue with a greenish tint/teal is a very hard color to work with omg--#and I have to stick with it because of the reverse color pallete thing Im doing but omg it's a hard color I should have just gone with #the color everyone always chooses for Gaster #purple #but I mean #the teal kinda makes him fit in with the CORE aesthetic so it fits #wait I think I'm rambling a lot in these tags #anyways let's cut to the actual tags #forgettable-au #undertale au #papyrus!gaster #papyrus is gaster #undertale #papyrus #gaster #undertale fanart

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twisting-in-wonderland · 1 year

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let! him! have! his! octopus! plush! >:[

(messy extra stuff----)

meanwhile,back at NRC:

(+ here’s a WIP >:] )

#twst #twisted wonderland #jade leech #harveston sledathon #azul ashengrotto #i'm. tagging him because. he's there in spirit in the pic--- and he's under the read more-#ram's art #i mainly used this as a practice for something - which is why it's messyyyyyy #anyways i think he should have been allowed an octopus :[ to limit him to land animals only is mean :[[[[[#also i am. enjoying this event so much fr #oh yea - i sorta tried to wing the fabrics that jade picked----#i. think. at least---#i didn't actually re-read that part so i probably mis-remembered what he picked aha---#oh also also dont look at the sled <3 i sorta . skimmed drawing it #anywaysss mush! mush! little plush octo!!! you can do it!

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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 10 months

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First and Last appearances of Poorly-Drawn-MDZS Season 1!

#poorly drawn mdzs #mdzs #not tagging them all here cause these are just comic excerpts #left out a quite a few characters cause they either didn't show up enough OR their first/last is a poor representation #the 'omg its Hanguang Jun' call back was intentional B*)#Surprised that no one pointed it out but now *I* can! Bursting into the scene fabulously is how LWJ starts and ends season 1!#Jin Ling has the least dramatic glow up (honestly I have been finding him harder and harder to draw) but he *does* have a moral glow up #I think *this* comparison is the one I feel best emphasizes my journey on this blog.#thank you to everyone who started following and cheering me on. Especially those who've been here since the very start #That said - no matter when you found this blog; It means a lot to me B*)#that's it for the reflective meta posting: season 2 starts back in July. I've gonna take this week to catch up on asks!

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cometshift · 29 days

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predisasters

#phighting #phighting art #subspace phighting #medkit phighting #art #subspace #medkit #predisaster tag #i think young subspace often gets way too overconfident and there's like a 50/50 chance it'll end weirdly well for him or very badly instea #medkit is the down to earth guy to keep him in check... maybe. if he feels like it #but more often than not he finds more amusement in seeing subspace eat shit. he thinks it's funny #though even when he does try subspace is too stubborn to listen to him. so medkit just leaves him to his luck. they're both terrible #i didn't mean to write so much in the tags sorry i have so many thoughts on them. i'm normal #also i made the 3d model in the top right on the first image i'll post renders soon hehe

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viperwhispered · 5 days

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Too Hard

Woop part 2 of the trip inside Jamil's head. Part 1 here.

The next time Jamil caught sight of you on campus, his first instinct was to turn around on his heel.

What a stupid thought to have because of you.

Besides, that would only make him more conspicuous, not less.

So, when your eyes met his, Jamil gave you a short nod in greeting. He would’ve left it at that and kept on his way, had you not walked up to him.

“Hi Jamil! How’s it going?” you said with that impossibly disarming smile of yours.

Why was it so difficult to look at you like he normally would? You had no right to make him feel so stiff, so unnatural.

On autopilot, Jamil exchanged a few pleasantries with you - those lessons from his parents had been instilled too deep in him for him to falter too badly in a simple exchange such as this. Still, Jamil quickly excused himself by telling you he still had to find Kalim before his next class.

Jamil didn’t miss the way your smile faltered. Had you hoped to get something out of him?

“Oh, okay. I’ll see you two later, then.”

Something about that irked him, though Jamil did not allow himself to dwell on it further.

His heart really had no business still racing as it did when he walked away, unaware of the frown on his face.

Just act normal. That’s all he needed to do.

After all, he had no time for dwelling in silly fancies.

If Jamil had been acutely aware of you before, it only seemed to worsen now that he was making a conscious effort to not act any differently with you. In fact, the harder he tried to keep you out, the more you invaded his thoughts, unsettling him.

The most innocuous words from you looped in his mind, and even the simplest actions caught his eye. For goodness's sake, he’d found himself staring at you while you were queueing up in the cafeteria the other day, not even doing anything other than standing around and looking bored!

For once, Jamil found himself grateful for all his duties. At least they provided him with something else to occupy himself with.

After all, if he was busy enough, it was difficult to think about those bright eyes of yours, your sweet laugh, or the way you bit your lip while thinking.

Still, sometimes it felt like no matter which way he turned, you were there, ready to throw him off-kilter. Not like it was his fault that often the most convenient route to class intersected with your daily routines. Or that your face seemed to jump out from any crowd, catching his attention.

Which certainly did not help his basketball performance. Jamil certainly did not recall you having such an interest in sports before, yet suddenly you were always there, distracting him. What had changed?

Could you possibly-

Jamil scoffed to himself, forcing his thoughts back on track for the nth time that day.

He picked up the tray of food and started taking it to Kalim. After dinner, he’d need to help Kalim with his homework, there were some housewarden tasks that would need dealing with, not to mention the preparations for the next-

Jamil froze in his tracks.

The voice he heard was quiet, but it was unmistakably you.

Really, it should not have come as such a surprise to him. You had become a rather frequent visitor to Scarabia, and Kalim often invited you to stay for meals. In fact, Jamil had started planning the dorm’s meal prep with your tastes and dietary restrictions in mind, just in case.

Jamil rounded the corner with strange exhilaration, his heart fluttering needlessly.

Yet, his mood evaporated when he saw you.

Why did you stop talking and look so guilty as soon as you caught sight of Jamil?

Jamil knew that look you gave to Kalim, had used it himself a thousand times. The one telling Kalim to keep quiet about something.

What could there possibly be that you would be comfortable sharing with Kalim, but not with him? That would give Kalim reason to sit so close to you, a comforting hand on your shoulder?

Jamil's mind raced with possibilities, yet could not settle for any single explanation.

He’d have to ask Kalim about it later.

Jamil gave you a short, polite greeting, his eyes lingering on you in an attempt to read what you were hiding.

“If I’d known you were coming over, I would’ve prepared something for you to eat as well,” Jamil said, already thinking about which parts of the dorm’s dinner to spruce up for you.

“Oh, no need, just figured I’d pop by. I’ll get out of your hair soon enough,” you said, something sheepish about your expression.

As expected, Kalim asked you to stay and dine with them, and with just a bit more persuasion you agreed - though not before telling Jamil that he should join you too and have himself a breather.

And since Kalim agreed with you, Jamil soon found himself sharing a meal with you and Kalim. Yet, even as he sat down with the food, his mind raced.

Had you been getting particularly close to Kalim lately? But surely Jamil would’ve noticed such a thing. Maybe someone from the dorm had been giving you trouble? But if that was the case, then surely you could let Jamil know about it, too. Unless for some reason you did not want to? But if it was something that concerned Kalim, then sooner or later it was bound to concern Jamil, too.

All the while, Kalim was talking to you about this and that, the latest topic being the animals kept on the Asim estate.

“I’ve got some pictures, let me show you!” Kalim said with an excited grin.

Only, a thorough patting of his pockets and a look around confirmed that Kalim’s phone was nowhere to be seen.

Jamil pinched the bridge of his nose. Where had Kalim left it this time?

Before Jamil even had the chance to say that he would handle it, Kalim sprinted off. Jamil hesitated for a moment, automatically halfway up from his seat, before he decided that leaving a guest unattended would be a worse offense than not helping out his master.

Jamil slumped back down with a sigh, mentally tracing the path Kalim took today, trying to recall the last time he saw Kalim handle his phone.

“Breathe. He’ll manage,” you said. There was the faintest of smiles on your lips, and Jamil could not decide if it was knowing or amused. Perhaps both.

Somehow, despite his frustration, Jamil’s own lips wanted to curl up too.

“Hmm. Maybe he will.”

Sure, Jamil could’ve called Kalim’s phone, to make it easier to find, but it was not that urgent, was it?

Jamil took another bite of his food, keeping an eye on you from the corner of his eye.

How was his mind so empty and so buzzing at the same time?

“You know-”

“So-”

You looked at each other, both just as surprised that the other had spoken up at the same time.

Even your surprised look was so-

“You first,” Jamil said. The way you bit your lip... Jamil had to raise a cup to his lips, slowly sipping his drink.

“Just… Feels like it’s been quite a while since I’ve seen you be still, you know. Or exchanged more than two words with you,” you said. You were attempting a light, joking tone, yet it was quite clear there was more to it.

“You say that like it would be unusual for me to be busy.”

He was not prepared for the way your soft sigh tugged at his heartstrings.

“No. It is not.”

You were both quiet after, poking at your meals. Normally, Jamil would’ve cherished such a moment of peace, yet this particular silence between you two was decidedly awkward.

Where was your usual chatter? Why weren’t you looking at him like you usually did?

“If you’re worried about me, don’t. I’m fine,” Jamil said, some softness creeping into his tone despite his best intentions.

“That's what Kalim said too,” you said. Yet the way you looked at Jamil made it clear you were still skeptical.

Wait.

Had you clammed up earlier because it had been Jamil you had been talking about with Kalim? That Kalim had comforted you about?

The thought twisted his stomach into knots.

Hasdhfsdf the way I fought with that last scene I swear. I don't even want to know how many versions I went through, trying to figure out how to say what I wanted without rubbing it into your face or making it too veiled. The joys of trying to convey things through a limited pov. Hopefully it came out reasonably balanced in the end. Rip to all those sentences that were lovely on their own but didn’t work for the whole. Hopefully I can rehome y’all one day. I do have thoughts for part 3 and part x (might be some chapters between those two as well, who knows at this point), so maybe we'll see those at some point, too. Tag list: @colliope @crystallizsch @diodellet @jamilsimpno69 @jamilvapologist @twstgo If you'd like to be tagged for future works, let me know! (Just be aware that sometimes I do also write nsfw, though you can certainly ask to be tagged only for particular kinds of works.)

#twisted wonderland #jamil viper #twisted wonderland x reader #jamil viper x reader #ner writes #jamil definitely knows how to deal with his feels #also writing this is making me wonder how aware jamil is of his inner versus outer life #like he’s very aware of how he comes across because that’s what he’s been told to watch out for #but how well has he truly learned to understand himself and his own feelings wants etc?#(I mean as you can tell I’m assuming not very well)#originally this went to more of a “jamil hears just the wrong part of the conversation” route but #a) I kinda hate that trope especially when it’s dragged on beyond belief and #b) Kalim maybe doesn’t want to spill anyone’s secrets but he really is such an open book especially with Jamil so #also it’s not like jamil needs the extra help to catastrophize he already does that well enough on his own 🙃#tho then I went a little too far in the other direction and had to pull back #but let's just hope I didn't edit this to death by now #also also: since I seem to have a bit of a naming theme going on for this series #if I were to be the sort to go for the angst route what part would definitely be titled Too Late or something along those lines #also x3 but loved folks commenting on that part about reader being inoffensive in the first part #I certainly had fun writing that line #(and in general extra love to everyone who leaves comments on tags replies wherever always great to read those)#(and in general chat with y'all)

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lloydfrontera · 1 month

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i'm about to be a bitch about alloyd so like. skip ahead if you're not into that ig.

the thing thats grinds me the most about alloyd is that,, we've seen lloyd plan out living the rest of his life at someone's side. we've seen him actively wish to spend the rest of eternity with someone. we've seen him think what sounds suspiciously like marriage vows about someone.

i am not joking or exaggerating here are the quotes:

That’s why, you bastard. I’m going to take care of you until the very end. Once I, your wise and older friend, solve the restoration of destiny problem, you’re going to enjoy the rest of your life by my side in peace. [...] He smiled at Javier and thought to himself. You’re my only friend, Javier. I couldn’t have overcome all the obstacles in front of me without your help. So, my trustworthy and reliable comrade, stick with me until I become a lazy lord and you become my personal guard. I hope we will be able to grow old together… -ch 327

Lloyd felt reassured by Javier's presence as he gazed at him. He could not have gotten this far without the knight. Therefore, he did not want to lose Javier and hoped they would keep bickering with each other for eternity. -ch 361

He thought he'd always be with Javier for the rest of his life. Just like now, he thought they'd spend all their time together moving forward. And like they always did, they'd be by each other's side during hard times. Happy moments. Relaxed days. They'd share all these moments as they exchanged insults and corny jokes, growing old as a lazy lord of a fiefdom and his knight. Lloyd always thought so. The thought just came naturally, without much effort from him, much like breathing. Lloyd believed that Javier would always remain by his side as that was how it had been until now. -ch 222

and at no point in any of those occasions has he ever sounded remotely afraid, threatened or uncomfortable with the idea.

so how come he is all of that when it comes to the idea of marrying what is supposed to be his canon love interest? like???

This is bad. Really bad. Terrible feelings struck his gut. Lloyd's lifelong wish was to find a rather ordinary woman to fall in love with, before getting married and having kids with her to lead an unremarkable family life. This was the extent of the luxury he had always dreamed of, not the frantic romance with the mightiest queen in the entire continent. I can see and feel it. I can sense it. This isn't good. Lloyd could see himself in the queen's pockets, like a scaredy cat in the presence of a ferocious lioness. -ch 390

Lloyd became speechless, even though he desperately wanted to call it an absolute abuse of power, tyranny, and dictatorship. But I'm kind of excited and glad... except what kind of marriage proposal is this threatening...?! But Lloyd couldn't bring it out in words, as his queen had already taken him by his hand. It was rough, yet warm. He could feel every heartbeat that was clearly pounding faster than usual. Ugh. There goes my dream of ordinary living. Lloyd quickly wiped off the tear that was about to fall from his eyes at the thought of the frightening romance. -ch 393

does this sound like someone in love???? like?? genuinely?? is this really what the main character should feel about his love interest???

i'm not even saying that the way lloyd feels about javier is inherently romantic, him feeling perfectly comfortable and hopeful about spending the rest of their life together is perfectly explicable by their close friendship.

but why make your protagonist sound so terrified of the idea of marrying what is supposed to be the love of his life?? when you never did that when writing about his other close relationship??

it's just. it's frustrating. to me lmao

#i talk a lot <3 #tged #the greatest estate developer #lloyd frontera #alicia magentano #anti alloyd #<- i hate having an anti tag but i think i should start tagging my critical posts because. i'm being very mean about it ajkshjkdsf #anyway. how insane is it that bk moon wrote the perfect romance by accident and didn't realize because he wrote it for two male characters #it grates in my bones whenever he writes characters being afraid of their wives #like. god. whenever he mentions wives nagging i feel murderous.#the only exception is maybe berkis. who actually loves when his wife nags at him. and deliberately does stuff that will make her nag.#but even that is on thin ice

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paron1a · 11 days

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His ass does not survive in five nights /J

Ok another tlm x fnaf movie last one..... No promise

#i consider making an asking blog for this au but uh i'll just think about it later🧍#someone save this man #he look pathetic in this au what i didn't mean to #rex dangervest #the lego movie #the lego movie 2 #lego movie #my art #lego movie fanart #tlm #tlm2 #i'm quite forgetful about tags sometimes so that's why this time i add more tags...#i still don't have a name for this au💀

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lazysunjade · 4 months

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J A N U A R Y | 01

"happy birthday, Puppy."

#ts4 render #ts4 edit #oc: yehl #oc: taryn #a direct continuation of my tags from last January 1st #yehl teaching a masterclass on how to feed your dragon husband #sorry he's peak femboi in this his face is so perfect I regret nothing #this is like the most dressed down we've ever seen him #honeypie didn't even got his hair did or his nails on #starting the year of with chaos means I have no standard to hold myself to #also modern au yeryn vibes is them jetting all around the world and living out of luxury hotel rooms #so I have an excuse not to have to build their house in blender #it's on the list but just like who has the time not me #simsnsfw

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hoardlikegoldenirises · 2 months

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This is Peter's "move your arm before I kill you" face 😄 aka his "I only agreed to stand here to make my aunt happy and would rather be anywhere else" face.

EDIT: decided to change the eyeshine color lol

closeups and a bonus doodle below:

say cheeeeese!!! (left to right: flash, janine, aracely)

I realized while drawing this that I accidentally put the boys in left-to-right order from least- to most-fucked up face 😂 Ben and his perfect nose 🙄🤣 IDK what he's saying but probably something engineered specifically to make Peter mad.

He's smiling. 🙂💢 See? Busted nose. Turns out I also put them in order of "least to most traumatized," now that I think about it... Peter is a little less uptight by 2016 but... only a little. He might even not be wearing the costume under his clothes.

I know you're probably thinking "how the fuck is Ben less traumatized than Peter?" but in this case it's true. Ben is the most well-adjusted of them all. Comparatively.

Kaine is definitely wearing his costume under his clothes. Head to toe coverage, no skin except face and hands basically ever. When I sat down to sketch this pic this morning I realized that he probably doesn't like having his picture taken, because he has very bad self-esteem (understatement) and lots of scars, but probably also for Warren reasons, as essentially an ex-lab specimen. So he's hiding.

His hair would be in the process of growing back out from a buzzcut, if it's November 2016... so a bit longer than his shoulders, most likely.

If it wasn't like, May's idea to take the pic and Janine w/ the camera Kaine would not be tolerating this. He'd either leave or break the camera LOL but... if May wants a pic... he can at least pretend to be in it.

Miss Maybelle... The only one in the pic who doesn't have anything weird going on (ah, her strange nephews and their strange eyes). She has an O2 tank though. Her lungs are not very strong after 2012 because ummmm... Kaine stabbed her in the chest. (He apologized, it's fine 😓😅)

Ben's tan lines 😂 peter has 'em too but Peter is all covered up obv. Peter's neck tan line is actually way higher up though, because his costume has a higher neckline so he has to wear higher collars/scarves/whatever even if he rolls the neck down. But (not pictured) Peter's arms are more tan than Ben's because Ben's Scarlet sleeves are longer than Peter's Spidey sleeves. Obv Ben isn't wearing (the top of) his costume in this pic though. and they can both roll the sleeves up anyway.

That's the watch Peter got May for her birthday in 2007 btw. Actually the color is wrong because I didn't bother to check my own #lore but also because I almost forgot to color it at all (lol whoops) so I was just like. It's purple, I remember that much. But the strap is supposed to be "pale violet linen."

I also almost forgot to draw Peter's wedding band entirely 😂 Luckily I remembered! lol

Kaine is wearing a kilt, by the way (over jeans or leggings or something probably... well, maybe not leggings if his costume is underneath...) My goal is for him to find a different way of expressing his masculinity. related to why i am sticking to pink for his theme color (for costume etc.) and letting him grow his hair back out. I think he probably has some genders going on but not in the way that Flash has. He's not a girl. More like he wants to be nothing at all... null gender... etc... but also he doesn't have the language for that and would likely push back against it because of the way he was treated by Warren and the issues he has with like. personhood and manhood... but experimenting with (expensive) clothing is a way for him to explore his own autonomy in spite of that treatment and a way to learn to hate himself a little bit less, maybe, even though he's still very insecure.

he also has a "nazi punks fuck off" shirt, but... he wouldn't wear that to thanksgiving with aunt may... probably. I'm sure his leather jacket is around here somewhere...

i picked thanksgiving arbitrarily btw 😂 it just made the most sense as a reason for may to force i mean ask them all to come over and get pictures and stuff. kaine leaves nyc in 2012 following ben and only comes back for good in 2016, but when he and aracely first come up in the summer there's a bunch of stuff happening so it makes sense to do fall, once it's settled down...

May: Oh, by the way Peter, I invited your... brothers... to Thanksgiving. Peter: You did WHAT?!

#let's pretend they have a photo backdrop because i didn't want to draw a background #ben reilly #peter parker #kaine parker #aunt may #clone bros #nadiart #fanadiart #came in through the window last night #flash would be on E for like a year at this point... small changes #not sure which art tag to use for this.................#rough art #but also #shiny art #kind of in between #peter is a lil tilted (i mean the drawing is literally crooked) but he looks extra tilted because ben's sleeve is in front of his shoulder #alas #i'm not fixing it

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tarisilmarwen · 7 months

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"Thrawn only joined the Empire to help the Chiss!"

Okay sure but have any of you bothered to self-examine why Thrawn chose to join the Empire instead of, say, the Republic, when that was still around? Or why he didn't chose to throw in with the Rebellion, put his tactical mind to use helping them overthrow the Empire quicker?

Could it be... perhaps... that maybe he values the Empire's military strength... more than he cares about the authoritarian tyranny with which it oppresses its own people?

Is it possible that he thinks the Empire's main problem is that it isn't effective enough, too much politicking getting in the way of sound strategy, but if he's around (and in charge) he can guide things so that those annoying little wrinkles (AKA the pockets of discontent and rebellion and fully justified anger at their rights and freedoms being trampled on) are all smoothed out and the overall Imperial machine is better, more in control of its assets, a stronger more unified bulwark against the outergalactic threat of the Grysk or the Vong or whatever.

Is it perhaps just a bit self-centered of him to only care about the Empire's ability to service his own goals and desires and be apathetic (at best) to the way it makes people suffer daily under its inherent systems? The Twi'leks and Wookies being constantly kidnapped and sold into slavery? The careless industrialization of arboreal worlds? The socialization and absorption of all private industry, forcing everyone to work through and with the Empire if they want to work at all? The systematic persecution of anyone remotely Force Sensitive? Is it not the mark of some kind of soul rot to be aware of all of that and go, "Yeah, but I don't care, they have the bigger guns, which is what I need."?

Maybe... just maybe... Thrawn has some Machiavellian tendencies and opinions and maybe this just might... make him not entirely a good person?

And maybe y'all should think about that before you come back and whine about his portrayal as a villain, as if all he has to do is explain to people that he did everything for a good reason and he gets an automatic narrative pardon for all of the shit he did while Grand Admiral that still needs to be addressed and answered for.

#yeah another thrawn rant has been brewing for a while #listen it's not that i don't want thrawn to have depths and pathos and dimensions to his character #what i'm saying is that NONE OF THAT MATTERS ONCE HE JOINED THE EMPIRE #because he sure as hell didn't work to subvert the empire at all even knowing the kinds of things they do #so no i'm sorry there is no clean 'i had good intentions' moment #where everyone just arbitrarily accepts his Sad Backstory and declares everything okay #him doing everything he did 'for his people' does not mean the people he DID hurt don't get to demand and expect justice #what annoys me is not that thrawn has complex motivations #it's that fandom seems to think the motivations cancel out the MEANS and METHODS #which is why in all their stories thrawn gets to just go home and have a happily ever after with eli vanto or whoever #that is not what is going to or what should happen in canon guys #not fandom tagging this if you see it it's your own dang fault for being out in the wilds of the untamed tumblr search #dunking on the blue bastard

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imgonnabethatone · 5 months

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I want Fit and Pac to collide on what love is for them, I think.

It's amazing to see all the content on them and I immensely enjoy every single piece of fanart/fanfiction that goes

when Fit gets broody and upset over not being gentle enough for Pac and Pac has heart eyes because Fit is completely drenched in someone's blood and then they kiss over Cellbit's corpse.

But maybe I also like the idea that Fit wants to be gentle to Pac, wants him to be a special little someone that deserves the softest he has to offer. And then Pac doesn't get it!

Idk, maybe they talk, and Pac confesses that it's "really cool" or whatever to see Fit absolutely rocking people's shit and Fit goes "So... you find me attractive because I am dangerous?" and initially he thinks like "yeah you know what fair enough" 'cause Pac absolutely can fall in a cave and just stay in one place and wait for Fit to help him despite being perfectly capable on his own. Maybe he likes being taken care of and feeling protected by someone - Fit can certainly provide. And it's all true, but in the moment Pac lightly responds with "Oh yeah! You could break me in half no problem, it's really hot" and Fit goes Huh. It's Unusual to like a person that you assess as a potential danger to you. And he worries that Pac is afraid of him, so goes in to reassure him, something along the lines of:

"Well, first of all, you are very strong, so I probably wouldn't win against you in a fight--"

"Oh, I wouldn't fight you, what?" And it's worse, actually.

"--But I'd also never just, what? Attack you for no reason? Murder you? I'm not going to do that to you, Pac!" He finishes anyway, desperately hoping to get his point across.

Pac gets nervous immediately, like he always does when he feels that his words or actions have somehow been unpleasing to the people around him and he needs to fix his behaviour asap. He sounds a bit hurried, a bit pleading when he starts with "No, of course not, of course not!" and Fit relaxes, because it's all a big misunderstanding-- "But, I mean, if you have to! For some horrible, sad, lore reason. Or if-- for any other reason, not lore. I'd let you, you know? Whatever you need." And Pac hugs his own arms, and his voice gets kinda quiet and stuttery to the end of that sentence, as if he can't tell whether he is redeeming himself or making it worse (he is absolutely making it worse - Fit feels sick to his stomach - but he has no presence of mind to tell Pac that). And still, he looks directly into Fit's eyes, sure, determined, even, as he lays himself out like a lamb to the slaughter. As if he has no worth outside of what others can take from him. As if in his head there is an outcome where Fit will hurt Pac and Pac has preemptively forgiven him for it, is looking forward to it.

(There isn't such outcome, because hurting Pac is never an inevitability or fate - only a choice that Fit will not make. But Pac seems convinced that this betrayal of trust is not only expected, but is also somehow desirable.

And it makes Fit... not scared. But very, very worried.)

#qsmp #qsmp fitmc #qsmp pac #fitpac #idk just thoughts aloud #bonus points if Fit wonders whether that means that Pac has also accepted that he will hurt Fit and whether he can trust him at all #Fit isn't ashamed of his violent past or present #but he wants Pac to be special and exempt from the bloodshed #while Pac convinces himself that violence can BE love #which it can *points at murder husbands*#but only when it's not violence TO ONE OF THE PARTNERS *points at murder husbands more agressively*#sorry if it came out contrary I didn't mean to I have so much respect for everyone in the fitpac tag you guys are so smart and creative

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