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pyramid-of-starrs · 8 months

Text

Stay with me

Pairing: Clingy Boyfriend San X Black/WOC Fem reader

Genre: Fluffy Smut (Tbh it got pretty filthy)

Warnings: Clingy behavior, whining, lowkey toxic behavior, possessiveness, oral sex (fem receiving), fingering, unprotected sex (be safe), anal play (tehe, I said it got filthy), creampie, saliva, Y/N is dick whipped real bad lol

Word Count: 3.8K

A/N: This will absolutely be getting a part two since this is not the original plot of this story lol.

Pt 2

Chapter Song Rec

You stretched out while sitting at your desk in your room, shutting your work laptop and happily jumping up from your chair. It was finally the weekend, and you were so excited, you wanted to get out the house and do something, anything! A ding was heard from your phone, and you grabbed it off of the charger on the side of your desk to see your friend group chat going off

Erica: It's friday hoes what we doin today Katrina: idk but I'm down for whatever Erica: OMG let's go to that club down town! There was some fine ass men last time we went Meg: OOOUUU yes! The dude that just wanted to buy us drinks all night! Katrina: Now y'all know Y/N boo'd up ass ain't gone go if we lookin for dudes Meg: Is she even gone come? San be havin her locked up lmaoooo Meg: Y/N bitch wya??? Y/N:I'm here and I'm coming! Ain't nobody locked up lol Erica: I'll believe it when I see it bitch lol lets meet at my house at 10 to pregame then leave! And Y/N tell San to back the hell up off you!!!

You tossed your phone on your bed and sighed, they did have a point. Ever since you started dating San about 8 months ago your attendance for friend gatherings and outings has gotten less and less, it wasn't like you were doing it on purpose it's just that San was very adamant about spending lots of time with you. He always wanted to be with you when you two weren't working, he came over when he got off, spends the night or ask you to spend the night, takes you out all the time and even comes to pick you up just to take you back to his house that was 20 minutes away. Though you loved your time spent together you were used to having your space, this was your first time dating a clinger and you didn't mind but maybe it was time you told him you wanted to do something else with someone else for the day.

Just as you were finishing your thought your phone rang again. You sat down on your bed and picked it up, speak of the devil.

"Hello?"

"Babyyyy"

You can already hear his whiny tone, it was cute you had to admit it, a grown man acting cutesy would usually be cringy as hell but this grown man made it work somehow?

"Yes baby? What's wrong?"

"I want to see you can I come over?"

"I'm going out tonight with my friends San."

You could hear a long groan before he continued the conversation.

"But I really miss you, I haven't seen you in forever."

"You saw me yesterday..."

"A WHOLE 24 HOURS! I'm suffocating without my baby!!"

You laughed at his dramatics.

"Fine...you can come over but you have to leave when I leave and you're not allowed to try to convince me to stay with you."

"...okay..."

"Promise me San."

He smacked his lips and groaned again; he was obviously going to try to convince you to stay with him, but he had to be good...just this once.

"I promise."

"Okay, you can come over."

You went to take a shower while San was on his way, you stepped out and put on your robe, once you walked out the bathroom your phone rang, you went to answer it already knowing who it was.

"Hey baby, let yourself in I just got out the shower."

The call ended and a few moments later you can hear the front door opening and closing while you're in your room, footsteps can be heard as San approaches.

"I'm naked still hold on."

If anything, that gave him even more reason to come in, San immediately opens the door to see you in a black pair of panties and a black crop top, his smile dropped to a face of disappointment.

"You liar you said you were naked." He said in a pouty voice.

"Sorry to disappoint, pervert." You giggled at him and sat on your bed, you picked up the lotion that you put on your bed.

"Let me do it."

"San"

"Come ooon, I already can't spend the night with you at least let me rub you down for the night."

"Fine." you flipped the lotion bottle to face him, and he came to sit next to you, he grabbed your legs and put them across his lap, your body turning to face him. He squeezed the lotion on to his hands, rubbing his hands together he started to rub it onto your thighs.

"So, what are the plans for tonight?" He asked with a smile on his face, even though San was sad that you were going out tonight he really was happiest when he was with you, even doing small task like this made his heart flutter, he really loved you.

"My friends want me to go to this club we went to a while ago, we are going to pre-game first though, they said they miss me since I don't go out much because I'm always with you."

He finished one of your thighs and moved down to your calves, he lathered you up while massaging your legs.

"Well, I could always come with." He said smiling like a cute little cat.

"No sir, no boys allowed, you would mess up the flow. Plus, all my other friends are single so it would be awkward."

He frowned at you shooting him down.

"That's not fair Y/N, it's not my fault they are all single! What if I get my friends to date them? Then we could go on group dates."

"Right, your friends that would rather play video games then see the light of day?" You said with an arched eyebrow.

He finished rubbing your legs and you walked to your drawers to look for the rest of your outfit for the night. San continued to talk about how he wished he could spend the night together and that he wasn't "technically" trying to convince you to stay with him just "Strongly suggesting" in his words. You turned on a chill RnB playlist on YouTube as you continued to get ready to drown him out. You were finishing up your make up while you were sitting at your vanity, well technically San was the one sitting on the vanities bench, he insisted that you sit on his lap while he held your waist and sadly rocked you back and forth. You finally took off your bonnet and brushed out your brown and blonde highlight wig you just installed last week; San watched you in awe.

"You're so gorgeous my love." He smiled; you could feel the love radiating off of him.

"Thank you, San." You looked in the vanity mirror slightly hunched over since San elevated you, so you were sitting a bit pass the mirrors height.

His warm and wholesome smile turned to a sneaky one as he decided to try one more thing to make you stay home. He buried his face into your neck as he sat behind you.

"You sure you don't want to stay here with me?" He said, trying to pursue you.

"Very sure." You said as you started to put away your make-up.

You could fill his plush lips start to slowly pepper kisses down your neck. At first you were just going to ignore him but then a particular linger kiss had suction to it as he started to suck your neck, you learned your head back and sighed. His hands left your waist and slid up your shirt, he started to massage your breast gently.

"Come on San I have to go, you told me you weren't going to do this tonight..."

"I'm not doing anything baby, I'm just appreciating your beautiful body and face."

You turned your face to the side that he was kissing as his lips migrated up from your neck up to your face then finally reaching your lips. The kiss was obviously not a quick appreciation kiss, so much lust as you followed his lead, his hands still on your breast as he made his way under your bra. You felt his fingers started to tweak your nipples and you moaned into the kiss, your moan was used as opportunity for San to put his tongue into your mouth, you had to stop it now or you were never going to make it out. You started to pull back from him, and he allowed you to.

"Come on pretty girl stay with me so I can give you what you really want." He said in a low raspy voice, his one soft kitten like eyes turned to lustful demon orbs, he rocked his hips forward so you could feel his semi-hard dick against your butt, your mini skirt left you bare on his laps, only your panties could protect you. You could have just said no and gotten up and left but you chose to stay silent, giving San hope that you could change your mind still. He leaned in to talk in your ear knowing that that was where you were weakest at.

"What if you stayed with me instead while I fuck your pretty pussy until you couldn't walk anymore? Or I could let you ride my face while you cum all over me."

It was like the devil himself was talking you into betraying God and eating the apple off the tree. Turning down San is the hardest thing you could do but you planned for this, you knew you were weak for him, so you texted your friend 30 minutes ago tell them to come pick you up. You were originally going to have San drop you off but the last time you did that you did make it out the apartment but 15 minutes into the drive San pulled into a Dark parking lot to fuck you in his backseat saying it was just a quickie. You ended up getting fucked so good your lace was lifted and your make up was running down your face.

"My friend is already on the way San."

Just in time your phone dinged and you picked it up thinking it was going to be your friend saving you from danger.

Meg: Hey girl, Katrina ended up needing a ride too and that's on the other side of you and she has no one else to pick her up, Imma grab her, could you ask your dude to drop you off?

You read the text in your head and so did the incubus behind you, you dropped your head in defeat as an evil grin was on his face, even had a maniacal laugh could be heard.

"Looks like she isn't, but don't worry baby I'll take you."

"Thank y-"

"But it'll cost you." San has never made you give him gas money, he thought as a man he should never have to ask you for money, plus he was paid much more then you.

"How much do you want?"

"Now, now gorgeous, you know good and well your money is no good with me, but you know what is?"

"Oh fuck."

....

You don't know how much time had passed, to be honest San was making you feel so good you didn't even know if you knew your own name or not anymore. His face was buried deep in your sopping wet pussy as his tongue explored your brown and pink folds. Your thighs sat pretty against his broad shoulders while his fingers dug you out. Your voice was horse as he was steadily working on your third orgasm, your hands full of his black hair as you gripped it tightly, it stung but San loved it because it meant he was doing a good job. Tears started to form in your eyes as you could feel your climax approaching.

"San, I'm about to cum."

"Already? I'm not done licking up the last one, you're going to have to hold it until I'm done."

You whimpered as San continued to draw perfect 8's on your clit, His two fingers were pounding deeply inside of you as he did the "come here" motion. Your hips lifted on and off the bed, your mind was going blank.

"Please San, please let me cum"

"Almost done."

Your nails dug into his scalp, your thighs started to close around his head, his sharp eyes darted up at you, he loved watching you go crazy.

"You're so good for me, go ahead and cum my angel."

"Ooooh Fuck" was all you could say as you came undone all over his mouth and fingers. You were a sobbing mess as San slowly pulled his fingers from your leaky cunt. He sucked all your cum off of his fingers as he put your legs back on the bed and leaned back up.

"C-can we go now San, it's getting late." you said in a defeated voice as you leaned up on your elbows.

He looked at his apple watch then back at you.

"What's the rush princess? its only 9:56, you still have time, plus I already told you if you want me to take you, you have to let me make you cum 5 times, and we have 2 more times to go." He said as he got off the bed and stood at the end of it.

"San I was supposed to meet them at-" he wasn't listening anymore, he was done talking, his mind was only focused on you cumming again and again for him. San loved the way you felt around his dick, the tight wetness drove him crazy and don't get him wrong when you sucked his dick, he swore he could see the gates of heaven open, but nothing ever compared to how good he felt when he made you feel good. It was not only a sense of pride but he honestly just loved you so much that making you cum was all he needed to get off. When you first started seeing San you let him know that a man has never made you cum before and you made a bet with him that it was impossible to get you to cum. Boy did he prove you wrong, he made you squirt the first time he ever ate you out and it was history from that point onward.

He grabbed you by both your thighs and dragged you to the edge of the bed, he didn't stop there because then he flipped you onto your stomach, San was strong because he worked out a lot so any chance he got to manhandle you, he took it. He gripped the sides of your hips as he pulled your ass in the air to connect to his crotch while your face stayed down. He didn't bother taking off your mini tennis skirt when he started to eat you out earlier since it was so short. You were arched in front of him, your pussy was bare since he ripped your panties off earlier. He stepped back a bit and stood there watching it drip and clench around nothing.

"Don't just stare at it." you said as you started to get shy.

"Why not? It's so pretty all I want to do is look at it." He said while biting his bottom lip.

You wiggled your hips a bit. "San come on you know we have to go soon, you're doing this on purpose." you said in a whiny voice.

Your whine was interrupted by a moan as he slid in his two fingers abruptly.

"So what if I am, this is my pussy to do what I want to it." he started to move his fingers faster.

"I don't even like your friends a lot because they are always trying to steal you away from me, taking you to clubs so other guys get to see you and fawn over you. I'm not there so they don't know this pretty pussy belongs to me. All they see is your sexy face and body wearing your little make up and this short ass skirt."

Sans full on possessive behavior was out, Clingy and possessive could absolutely be seen as red flags to anyone else but with San, those red flags were heart shaped. You loved how much he only wanted you for himself, but damn was in inconveniencing sometimes. He thrust his fingers deep into you at a steady pace, the over stimulation was killing you.

He continued, "If a guy walks up to you tonight and ask you for your number are you going to tell him you belong to me?"

“Yes- fuck!”

“Yes what? What are you going to say baby.” He dug his digits deep into you.

“That I belong to you.”

“Who is you? That’s not my name.” he held his fingers in you waiting for your reply.

“I belong to San Ah~ and only San.”

“Good job lovely, go ahead and cum for me.”

That was exactly what you did, it was that easy for San to make you cum, just some words and gestures. San once again pulled his fingers from your abused cunt, he brought them around to your face for you to suck your cum off them. You but both the wet fingers into your mouth and sucked them clean while he pumped them in and out of your mouth.

“Are you ready for me my love?”

You nodded as he removed his fingers from your mouth.

“I want words baby.”

“Yes San, please fuck me.”

He once again flashed that devious smile before undoing his pants and pulling out his fully erect dick, he pulled you back a bit before pumping it a few times. He lined his tip up with your entrance and you immediately started to clench it, as he slowly pushed his hot length into your wet cunt, moving slowly so you could feel every single inch he was feeding you. Sans dick was just not fair, it had a good and comfortable amount of length and width, but the best part was that his dick had a perfect curve that made him reach a spot in your pussy that most couldn’t. He had a firm grasp on both your hips to make sure you couldn’t run away from him, you fidgeted and whimpered while he stretched you out. Once he finally got all of him inside of you he held it in just so he could bask in the feeling of your hot wet walls against his raw dick, he bit him lip, closed his eyes and just held his head up to the ceiling. You started to become restless, feeling him so deep inside while he wasn’t moving made you dizzy.

“Please San, please move I need more.”

San came back to earth when he hears you begging for more and locked back in.

“Yes baby what ever you want.”

He started to rock his hips into you, you folded your arms under you and put your forehead on your forearm as you let pretty moans fall from your lips. His pace gradually sped up, his hands pulling you back to make his pelvis and your ass meet.

“Are you going to stay here with me?”

“N-No!” You replied.

He rolled his eyes and started to dig deeper into you, moving his hips even faster as your moans started to get louder.

“I said are you going to stay here with me?”

“San please.” You said in a whimpering voice.

He started to slam into you, your eyes began to roll to the back of your head, you felt your orgasm approaching. Just when you thought it couldn’t get worse San placed one of his hands on top of the beginning of your ass. His thumb started to rub your asshole, it was still wet from his spit and your slick when he ate you out. The sensation of him rubbing your second hole felt amazing then he slowly slid his thumb into your tight hole, you could feel him penetrating your asshole slowly while he was still drilling his dick into your drooling cunt. This is the the kinda fucking that makes people want to kill for their partners. You moaned so loud you knew you were going to get a notice complaint, he started to move his thumb in and out your ass.

“You’re such a nasty little bitch, letting my thumb fuck your ass while your pussy takes my dick. Are you this slutty for anyone else?”

“Only you Sannie, only you!” You yelled out, unable to control the volume of your voice anymore.

“That’s right baby, you’re my little slut right?”

“Yes~ I’m your slut.” Tears started to fall from your eyes, he was fucking you dumb with both your holes being stuffed, your pussy started to rapidly clench and unclench.

“Going to cum deep in this slutty pussy and make you walk around that club leaking my cum.”

He kept pounding his hips into and the mental thread in your mind snapped as you felt his hot seed deep in your womb, you couldn’t take it anymore and came around his still leaking dick. San slowly pulled out and backed up a bit, you immediately collapsed to the side of the bed as your eyes felt heavy.

San pulled up his boxer briefs and took his pants off while he smiled at how cute you looked when your were tuckered out. You laid on the bed breathing heavily and fighting the sleep since you were determined to make it out still, he walked to the bathroom to bring back a warm towel to clean you up, he wiped you clean then went to get a different towel, this one had micellar water on it. He sat at the head of the bed and opened his arms to invite you in to be held, you gladly accepted, he held you in one arm as you closed your eyes. He carefully removed your false lashes and placed them on the night stand, the started to wipe the make up you word so hard on off, your body was to tired to even fight it anymore. Your phone rang and San grabbed it and answered it before you could.

“Hello?”

“Hello? San? Where is Y/N?”

“She’s right here.”

“Well when are you bringing her over we waiting’ on her.”

“Oh, she said she’s to tired to go, you know, work and all that.”

The line got quiet for a second before your friend spoke again.

“Boy stop holding my friend hostage.”

San laughed before he hung up. Yeah you’re never going to see your friends again.

taglist:

@mingyuwus@sillyhappygirl@atiny-dime-p1ece@bloody-wine@angelsaway

#ateez smut #ateez fanfic #atz smut #san smut #san x black reader #san x reader #choi san smut

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hollybell51 · 1 year

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ok i know you said requests are backlogged but i also read your sam winchester fic (oh my god???? so good!!!!!) and i noticed that you put dean on your tag list form and i am literally in love with him so if you get time could you do like a hurt/confort fic for him where the reader gets like seriously injured and tells him she loves him because she thinks she's dying and doesn't wanna die without saying it?

Anon you are in luck, the supernatural brainrot is still going strong. Also if you wanna be tagged in stuff make sure you submit responses to that form otherwise I don't know what usernames to put xx

The other thing

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Dean Winchester x fem!Reader

Supernatural (2005)

Word count: 5.8K

Summary: hunting a ghost that only seems to attack young women, you volunteer yourself as bait. The plan doesn't exactly go to plan, leading to some confessions being made.

Content: ANGST. Angst, besties. Hurt/comfort, mainly hurt but there is some comfort there, whump (sorta), mostly Dean's perspective but still second person narrative voice (loml), probably bad characterisation but I think it's passable???? Sam is like the no. 1 Dean/you shipper, A+ wingman. Badly written emotional vulnerability but I tried I promise. Kissing, first kisses, "I love you"s, bit of blood but not too explicit, hospitals, etc. etc. Dean is a warning on his own but yknow what I love him. I may have missed some stuff so please don't hesitate to catch me on it!

Notes: ft. my freaking awful titles lmaoooo. This isn't really set during any actual episode, but I'm sorta working off only having watched the first two seasons so just assume it takes place somewhere around then. Also the more I watch this the more I just wanna grab him and put him in my pocket or something, it's so bizarre. He's so pretty. I love his cockiness, I love the little eyebrow thing he does, I love the little jaw thing he does. Sorry if I messed up any lore or anything, writing this was a fever dream but tbh I had fun, it's nice to just sorta write you know? Thanks for the suggestion Anon

“Guys, can you hurry up?”

Dean glanced over his shoulder, frantically sprinkling fuel over the exposed corpse below. He couldn’t see all that much in the darkness, but it didn’t exactly look like you had the upper hand. None of them had realised how big the ghost was until now, and with the machete it was currently slashing at you…

“Almost there!” Sam shouted, striking a match and casting it into the grave. The remains went up with a “whoomp!”, the ghost howled and stumbled back. It was difficult to really know what happened in those few moments as the light from the burning remains glinted off the metal of the machete and the ghost shimmered and began to disappear, but what was clear was that something had happened to you.

“Fuck,” you groaned, dropping your own weapon with a dull thud. You staggered, catching yourself on a headstone before your knees gave out and you sank to the ground. You were hunched over awkwardly, your shoulders heaving, hands clutched tight to your stomach.

“(Y/N)?” Dean asked, frowning. Were you hurt? Just out of breath?

“I’m alright,” you called. “Just… give me a second.”

“Shit,” Sam muttered, dropping the salt and packet of matches and running towards you. “Dean!” he yelled as he knelt down, stripping off his jacket and balling it up, pressing it to your stomach.

No, Dean thought. No, no, no, no. He was frozen, the can of fuel dangling limply from his fingers. He’d known using you as bait for a psychotic ghost murderer was a bad idea, even when you’d insisted that you’d be fine. It wasn't that he didn’t think you could handle it – he’d seen you in action enough times to know you were a force to be reckoned with – but he’d had a horrible feeling something was going to go wrong from the moment you’d laid out your plan.

“He goes after girls, right?” You’d had an uncomfortable light in your eyes, all steely determination that Dean simultaneously loved and hated. Loved because, well, it was so you and it meant you were getting shit done, hated because more often than not you were putting yourself in danger. And yes, he was aware of the hypocrisy.

He’d tried to talk you out of it, Sam had too. But once your mind was set – and set it was – no amount of convincing on anyone’s part could do anything about it. The second the idea had begun to form in your brain, the path was laid and there was no point trying to change that.

“You better get over here man, quick!” Sam’s voice dropped, but wasn’t quiet enough that Dean couldn’t hear his next words, addressed to you. “Just hold on, Dean’s coming. Keep breathing, ok?”

Fuck, that didn’t sound good. Dean’s limbs jerked back to life. He didn’t waste another second, sprinting the few metres through the forest of tombstones to where his brother was bent over you.

“Don’t just stand there!” Sam yelled, one hand pressing his jacket to your stomach. “Help me!”

It was like his body was moving on autopilot, kneeling beside you and taking over from Sam without any input from Dean himself. Dully, he noticed that there was already a warm, damp patch on the jacket, as well as a dark spot glistening darkly over your side. Shit.

“I’ll be fine,” you’d insisted when he'd raised his doubts. “I’ve got you guys. You just burn the bones fast, I reckon I can hold him off for a few minutes.” Then you’d shrugged, grinning. “And if it all goes to hell, I know you’ve got my back.”

Yeah, fat lot of help they’d been.

“What happened?” he asked.

“He got me on his way out,” you laughed bitterly. “Can you believe that? Halfway gone and he just–” You broke off, making a vague slashing gesture with your free hand. “God, I’m an idiot.”

“No, no you did fine. We shoulda been quicker.” Dean assured you, pressing harder. “Sorry,” he muttered as you let out a pained whimper.

“‘Salright,” you grimaced. “My fault. Dean, I gotta–”

“Shh, no, it’s fine. It’s ok, you’ll be ok.”

You shook your head, tears mixing with the sweat on your face. He watched one trace a path through the dirt caked on your skin. “It’s important, please.”

He shook his head. “The only thing that’s important right now is keeping your eyes open, yeah? Just… just do that.”

“I’m calling 911,” Sam said. “Just stay there, don’t move.”

“I’m not planning on taking off, don’t worry.” You smiled tightly, then your face twisted in what Dean thought was fear, panic even. It was like a punch to his stomach, he hadn’t seen you look that scared since… Well, ever. Your hand fumbled over his, trying to find something to grab.

“It’s alright,” he told you, pressing on the jacked one-handed as the fingers of the other one twined with your own. “It’s alright, (Y/N).”

“No, no Dean, you have to burn me. Make sure you salt me, uh… Sage, use sage too.”

He felt the blood drain from his face, cold rushing through him. “What?”

“Please,” you begged, your voice breaking. “I don’t wanna hurt anyone. You have to get rid of me, ok?”

Oh God. Oh God. Dean looked up, searching frantically for Sam. He was watching you while he talked to the emergency operator, his fist pressed against his mouth and his hand shaking where he held the phone. He met Dean’s eyes, shaking his head.

“You’re not gonna hurt anyone because you’re not going anywhere.” Dean’s voice was blessedly steady, despite the uncomfortable lump in his throat.

“Promise me,” you whispered, then shouted when he didn’t respond. “Promise me, Dean!”

He gripped your hand tighter, your own fingers digging harshly into his flesh. “I promise you will be ok,” he said.

You sobbed, your body heaving under the rapidly dampening jacket. That was way too much blood for Dean’s liking, and judging by the increasing urgency of Sam’s quiet conversation on the phone, he felt the same.

Your panicked gaze locked on Dean’s face, tears coursing down your cheeks. “I don’t wanna go,” you choked. “I didn’t tell you. I can’t go.”

Didn’t tell him what? It didn’t matter. He squeezed your hand in what he hoped was a more reassuring than painful way. “It’s ok, you’re not going anywhere, alright? You’re staying right here, I’ve got you.”

“You’ve gotta listen to me, Dean–”

“No, tell me later. Just hold on, save your energy.”

“Dean–”

“(Y/N) hold on!”

“Dean!”

“Dean, listen to her.” Sam had finished on the phone, the screen shining eerily on his face. At Dean’s raised eyebrow he gave a tiny nod. Yeah, there was an ambulance on the way.

“Sam, she is not gonna die.” He shook his head, turning back to you. “We’ve got all the time in the world, ok sweetheart?” He searched frantically for something to say, anything to keep your attention. He was no doctor, but he knew it would be bad if you passed out. Very bad.

“Uh… fuck.” He broke off, floundering. What would keep you awake? What could he possibly say after you’d just made him promise to get rid of your spirit once you were dead, which was not going to happen.

“It’s actually not a bad night,” he started, already kicking himself mentally. “Bit of a breeze. I guess it’s sheltered down there, you’ve got a nice, uh, headstone blocking it. Ground’s not too bad either, not too hard. Glad it’s not gravel, my knees’re killing me.”

A watery laugh clawed its way from you before another sob wracked your body. “Dean, I gotta tell you…”

“Can you see the stars from down there?” he asked, cutting you off. “I bet they’re bright out here. No light pollution.” He grabbed your hand as your fingers loosened their grip, dread settling like a stone in his stomach.

Your eyes wandered away from his face, sweeping over the space behind him. You nodded, but the haziness that had slid over your face didn’t do anything to help Dean’s panic, especially now that you weren’t holding his hand nearly as tightly as you had been.

“Wait,” he said, squeezing your fingers. “Just focus on me, keep looking at me.”

Your eyes swung back to his. “Please,” you whispered. “Please Dean, listen to me”

Sam’s hand settled on his shoulder, large and heavy. He nodded to your face when Dean glanced at him, and to his horror he realised there were specks of blood on your lips.

He swallowed hard. He hadn’t realised, but this was probably one of the worst moments of his life. He’d entirely ignored even the possibility of you being injured, let alone dying – just thinking the word felt wrong – since you’d joined him and Sam, doggedly refusing to acknowledge the near physical ache the idea of your absence caused. Now it was happening, right in front of him. Heat prickled behind his eyes.

He took a deep breath, steadying his voice. “Yeah, alright sweetheart. You tell me, I’m listening.”

Relief washed over your face. “I wanted to say it,” you whispered, “before. I didn’t want it like this.”

“It’s ok. Sh, it’s ok.”

Your body convulsed under his hand with another sob, more blood leaking from the corners of your mouth. “I love you,” you choked. “I love you so much. I don’t wanna get stuck because I never told you.”

Oh. Oh. Dean’s mind went blank, then crashed right back into his skull. It was like swinging on a swing, at the peak of the arc where you floated a little before you started going down again. Yeah, that was his brain in that moment. Of course you’d have the guts to say it when he didn’t, even if it was out of fear of becoming an angry ghost. He cursed the universe and its cruel sense of humour. He faced horrors beyond most people’s imaginations almost every day, but still couldn’t say three simple words when he wanted to more than anything, and now you’d taken the first step for him and it was because you thought you were about to die. Someone up there must have hated his guts.

“I know,” he said finally, nodding. “I know you do. Hold on, ok? There’s an ambulance, it’s gonna get here any minute” It wasn’t what he wanted to tell you, but no matter how hard he tried he couldn’t make his mouth cooperate.

You smiled, your grip on his hand all but nonexistent now. Your breathing was getting shallower by the second, your eyes unfocussed and no longer trained on his face. It was like now that you’d said your piece, you weren’t even trying to stay awake. He didn’t like to be too dramatic, but he was almost convinced that he was the one who’d been stabbed, not you.

“No,” he whispered. “No, (Y/N), not you. Please, not you.”

A wailing siren sounded in the distance, blue and red lights flashing rapidly brighter as the ambulance drew closer.

“Just a few more minutes,” Sam said, pacing. His eyes never left your face. “Come on, (Y/N), any second now.”

You were perfectly still, too still. Dean leant over, careful to keep applying pressure to your stomach as he listened for breath. The faintest hint of it brushed his cheek, not enough. He blinked hard, holding you against his chest, his face pressed into your hair. It still smelled like the cheap shampoo from the most recent motel, mixed with blood and dirt and sweat. It should have been disgusting, but to Dean it smelled so right. He wondered what that said about his lifestyle choices.

“Please,” he whispered, his voice choked. “(Y/N)...”

Your hand slipped from his, and it was like a damn breaking. He felt his shoulders jerk, something between a sob and a grunt torn from him.

“I love you too,” he whispered, clinging so tightly to you he was half scared he was going to hurt you. “I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, (Y/N), I love you.”

The siren was deafening as the ambulance skidded to a stop, Sam waving frantically to the paramedics swarming the graveyard. Someone pulled Dean back despite his protests. Cold stung his cheeks, the breeze from earlier having turned into a wind. It vaguely occurred to him that the reason it was so cold on his face was because he was crying.

Everything was a blur as you were engulfed by uniformed paramedics, your limp form lifted onto a stretcher and born away into the vehicle. Someone tried to talk to him before Sam, uncannily put together and coherent, spoke to them and explained. There was a lot of nodding and “thankyou”s, then Dean was being loaded into the Impala like a little kid and Sam was driving like you were in the back seat instead of in the ambulance.

All he was aware of at the hospital was Sam’s hand gripping his arm, muttering that he needed to pull it together “for her, man.” The harsh, clinical lights and the rush that everyone seemed to be in wasn’t helping Dean’s panic, every prone body he glimpsed taking on your face until he blinked and it was a complete stranger. What if the unthinkable really happened? What if you died, and he hadn’t been able to save you, keep you safe like you’d been so sure he would? What if you really did linger as a tormented spirit, what if he and Sam had to hunt you, get rid of you like you’d said? He didn’t know if he’d be able to do that.

Finally, a serious looking man with a clipboard and a badge approached them. “Are you with the young woman–” he glanced at the clipboard, “(Y/N), who just came in?”

“Yes,” Sam said quickly. “Yeah, how is she? Is she alright?”

“She’s damn lucky someone put as much pressure as they did on that cut,” he sighed. “She’s lost a lot of blood, but she’s stable.”

Dean let out a breath he hadn’t even realised he’d been holding, shoving his hands into his pockets to hide their shaking.

“Thankyou,” Sam smiled. “Thank you, doctor. When can we see her?”

He frowned at the clipboard again, tapping his fingers on the plastic. “Well she’s unconscious, I daresay she will be for a while yet.”

“Please,” Dean interrupted. “I– we just need to see her.”

The doctor raised an eyebrow. “You boys family?”

“Brothers,” Sam lied at the same time as Dean said “husband.”

“I’m her husband,” he went on, ignoring the little flip his stomach did. Somehow, the familiar lie felt different now that he’d told you how he felt, even if you hadn’t heard. “He’s my brother in law.”

“Ok,” he shrugged, “but she won’t… Well, she was stabbed. There’s a lot of tubes, bandages, and she’s out cold. It might be…” He stopped, sighing. “Some people find it confronting, seeing their loved ones like this.”

Dean felt Sam glance at him, but he ignored it. “Trust me,” he said with a tight smile, “I’ve seen worse.”

He had not, as it turned out, seen worse. You were completely still apart from the gentle rise and fall of your chest, a thin cotton blanket pulled up and tucked in with clinical precision around your ribs. You had a little cut on your forehead that Dean hadn’t noticed at the graveyard. A drip trailed from the back of your hand to a cluster of bags suspended above you, a thin plastic tube wrapped around your head just under your nose. Oxygen, he assumed. If he ignored all that, you could have been sleeping.

Sam pushed the door open softly, as if he was afraid he’d wake you up. Dean hesitated a moment, then followed him inside. Up close, he could see the light sheen of sweat on your forehead, the darkness under your eyes, the pallor of your lips and cheeks. He reached out to touch you, maybe lay his hand on your forehead or smooth your hair away from your face, but drew his hand back at the last moment. He didn’t want to somehow unbalance you from whatever tightrope you were walking right now, even though he knew that was illogical. Still, even breathing the same air felt somehow dangerous for you.

“Did she tell you?” he asked Sam eventually.

“That she loves you?” He didn’t give Dean a chance to explain that he hadn’t meant that, that he’d been talking about your fear of not-quite-death. “She never said it outright, but I sort of worked it out, y’know? You guys weren’t really that subtle.”

Dean frowned. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Just…” He shrugged, gesturing vaguely between your prone form and Dean. “You’re always looking at her, when you think she can’t see you. She does the same. Always just sorta… doing little things for each other. And you’re always touching her, I don’t know if you realised.”

“Huh. I didn’t.” It was true, although it didn’t really surprise him. He liked the little smile you gave him whenever he picked something up from a store for you – a favourite candy, something you’d mentioned you felt like – and he’d just assumed when you did similar things for him it was because you were, well, you. But now that he thought about it, he couldn’t name half as many times when you’d taken the same care and effort for Sam. Not that you’d neglected his brother, it was just… slightly less personal, less specially catered. He felt a surge of warmth for you, then a pang as his eyes landed again on your too-pale face.

As for touching you, well, he wanted to. All the time. He wanted to put his hand on your shoulder, wrap his arms around your waist, hold you close and feel your heartbeat against his. Every brief half-hug or brush of your skin against his was something precious to him, so of course he’d want more. His mind flashed back to the tightness of your hand in his at the graveyard, the warm slick of your blood as you’d clung to him. Even that had been almost euphoric, past the raw terror and sickening dread. He was going to hold you like that again – under better circumstances – if it killed him.

“Yeah,” Sam went on. “She’s the same, actually.” He laughed, shaking his head. “I remember this one time, Illinois, I think. We got a motel room with the longest couch you've ever seen. You sat down in the corner, and she comes and sits right next to you! When she’s got, like, another two metres of space to choose from.”

Dean did remember that, actually. He remembered the rush he’d gotten as you’d squished up against his side, complaining that you were cold even though your skin had been warm to the touch. He still thought about it, sometimes. “Huh,” he said again.

“Yeah.” It was silent apart from the beeping of your monitor and the normal hospital sounds outside the room, then Sam turned and faced him. “I’m sorry,” he said.

Dean shook his head. “It wasn’t your fault. I shouldn’t have let her put herself out there like that in the first place.”

“No, I was supposed to have her back. I shouldn’t have taken so long with the salt.”

He wasn’t wrong, Dean knew that, but it had been him who’d agreed to your plan. You’d put your faith in him just as much as you had in Sam, and he’d let you down. He hadn’t liked the whole thing from the start, but still he’d gone ahead with it. And now here you were, lying unconscious in a hospital bed, and Sam was beating himself up about it. It was all so wrong, and Dean could have stopped it so easily. But as he looked at you, he swore he could hear you snorting derisively at him, crossing your arms with a firm “bullshit!”

“It’s my choice,” you’d say. “You’re really gonna try to steal my credit?”

“She’d call bullshit on you, you know,” he said.

His brother shrugged, nodding. “Yeah, you too probably. She’d poke you, right here.” He reached around and stuck his finger firmly in the middle of Dean’s chest, right where you’d done countless times.

Despite himself, Dean smiled. Then your drip beeped and he was jerked painfully back to the present, and the problem at hand.

“Did you know she was so scared?” he asked. “Of, y’know…” Dying. Haunting someone. Getting stuck here, not being able to move on.

Sam didn’t answer for a moment, then he sighed, still looking at you. “She mentioned it.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Why didn’t she tell me?

“She didn’t want me to. She thought you’d think… I don’t know, that she wouldn’t be able to do the job. She really didn’t want you to know she was scared, she was so worried about what you thought of her. She said you were…” He swallowed, cleared his throat, continued. “She said you were never scared, and she didn’t want you to think she was. Even when I told her we were all terrified.”

“Damn right,” Dean muttered. You’d done a great job at putting on such a brave front, he’d sometimes wondered if there was actually something wrong with you. Or maybe not wrong, but different. He’d never known anyone who could handle the things they did so well, not even his dad. It was something of a relief to know that there was more to it.

“She was convinced she’d be the type of person to get stuck,” he continued. “Kept saying she wouldn’t be able to move on, that she had too much that she was holding onto and she didn’t know how to let go.” He finally raised his head, looking at Dean with what he thought was pity. Any other time, that would have annoyed him.

“That’s why she said it,” he muttered, the uncomfortable lump back in his throat. When you woke up, he was going to give you a serious talk about timing.

Sam nodded.

“And she didn’t–” His voice broke, and he turned away. He wanted to punch something, put his fist through the wall or slam his hand down on the table, but he was too scared it would somehow disturb you. “I didn’t say it back.”

“Woah, hey.” Sam’s hand was firm on his shoulder, steadying him. “You did, man. You did.”

“I was too late! She was out!”

“Yeah, and you can tell her again when she wakes up.”

“What if–”

“No.” Sam shook his head firmly, fingers digging into Dean’s shoulder, anchoring him to the spot. “She’s waking up, and when she does you’re gonna ask her out on a proper date, she’s gonna say yes, and you’re gonna sort yourselves out like adults. Ok?”

Dean looked away. The prospect of asking you out suddenly felt enormous. Of course he’d taken girls on dates before, he knew what he was doing, but that had been more along the lines of “I think you’re cute and you’re clearly into me, let’s get dinner and then we can hook up.” He’d never faced “I’ve been pining over you for months and I was too scared to do anything about it but you almost died and told me you loved me – love, not like – and I have no idea where this is gonna go but Sam’s right and asking you out is probably the best next step even if it’s absolutely terrifying”. He was a total mess, and he knew it.

“Ok?” Sam asked again, insistent.

“Ok,” he agreed. “Ok.”

“Good.”

You didn’t wake up until a day later. Well, that was according to the time and date displayed on the clock opposite your bed. Dean didn’t really have any recollection of time actually passing.

He was slumped in the chair beside your bed, your hand held gently in his own as he dozed. He hadn’t let himself fully sleep since you’d been brought in, too afraid that something would happen while he was out, despite all Sam’s urging. Eventually he’d just sent his brother back to the motel, assuring him that he’d be fine on his own and that he wanted to be there for you when you came around.

He jerked out of his half-nap when your fingers twitched, cursing when his pain stabbed through his neck. Snoozing in hospital chairs was never a good idea.

“Fuck,” you groaned, frowning at the ceiling.

Dean cleared his throat, his mouth suddenly dry. “(Y/N)?”

You turned, your face clearing when you saw him. He’d be lying if he said it didn’t make his heart skip a beat. “Dean,” you whispered. “What’re you doing here?”

He shrugged, making to withdraw his hand, but your grip tightened. “I’m the ‘welcome back’ committee.”

“Oh.” You nodded, smiling softly. You ran your free hand over the bandage circling your waist, studying the IV embedded in your skin. “We got him, didn’t we?” you asked.

Right, the ghost. “Uh, yeah, he’s gone. Your plan worked,” he added, almost as an afterthought.

“It was a pretty good plan,” you grinned.

He shook his head. “It almost got you killed.”

“But it worked,” you insisted, your eyes shining. “He’s gone, Dean. Who knows how many people we saved?”

“And what about you, huh?”

You shrugged. “You can’t get rid of me that easily.”

He took a deep breath, bending his head so you wouldn’t see the moisture he was sure he could feel gathering in his eyes. How were you so casual about it? It had been your life on the line, you who’d gotten stabbed, who’d been bleeding out, terrified of not dying properly and becoming a ghost yourself.

“Hey,” you said gently, your hand slipping from his, sliding up over his arm to rest hesitantly on his shoulder. “Are you alright?”

“You almost died, (Y/N). Sam told me, what you said about getting stuck, being unable to move on.”

You were silent for a moment, then you sighed. “Well it’s just awkward now that I’m still here.”

Despite himself, Dean laughed. He raised his head, placing his hand over yours, rubbing his thumb in a circle over it. Your skin was warm as ever, dry to the touch. It was such a contrast from the graveyard, one he was glad of. You smiled, some of the colour already returning to your face.

“I’ve always got your back,” he said, “no matter what. Why didn’t you just tell me?”

“I wanted to, I really wanted to. But I just… I don’t know, I just couldn’t. Every time I tried it was like this brick wall went up in my brain.” You shrugged, drawing your hand back as you shifted to sit more upright. Dean missed its warmth instantly. “You’re always so… unfazed, you know? It felt kinda stupid.”

He snorted. Sure, Sam had already told him what you’d said, but it was different coming from you.

You folded your arms, as if you’d just won an argument. “See?”

“Shit, (Y/N),” he said, shaking his head. “I’m not – what’d you say? – unfazed. This shit gets to me too, I just…” He thought, unsure how to phrase it. “I didn’t wanna scare you,” he finally settled for. “Didn’t want you to worry.”

“Oh.” You picked at a loose thread in the blanket, biting your lip. “And the other thing?”

“Yeah, the other thing.” He’d known this was coming, he’d tried to find the words as he’d sat beside you, waiting for you to wake up. He’d almost had it, he told himself. How hard could it be, after all?

“I didn’t wanna die with, like, unfinished business. That’s the main reason people stick around. It felt like if I didn’t get it out there, I wouldn’t ever be able to… keep going. Move on.” You swallowed, not meeting his eyes. “It’s ok,” you went on, “if you don’t, y’know, feel the same. I’d understand.”

So you hadn’t heard him. Dean wasn’t surprised, but some part of him had been clinging to the hope that somehow his words had gotten through to you even as you were bundled into the back of the ambulance.

He shook his head. “I just wish you’d said something before.”

You looked up, hope chasing confusion across your face. “What?”

“I wish you’d said something before,” he repeated. “It would’ve saved us both a lotta trouble.”

“I don’t…” You frowned. “What’re you…?”

He shrugged, his heart beating a million mph. “I love you too,” he said simply.

You blinked, opening your mouth to say something, closing it again. Slowly, a smile crept across your features. “Alright,” you grinned, way too smug for Dean’s liking. “Alright then.”

“Don’t push it,” he warned, but the threat was empty and you both knew it.

You shifted again, leaning towards him. “Come here,” you said softly.

He stood, ignoring the ache in his back from the bloody uncomfortable chair.

Impatiently, you beckoned him closer.

He raised an eyebrow, brushing a stray piece of hair from your face. “Do I get to kiss you?”

“That’s the goal, yeah.” You rolled your eyes, tilting your face against his hand. Dean wasn’t fond of the whole “butterflies in your stomach” thing, but he had no idea how else to describe the feeling that tiny gesture conjured. It really was like someone had released a swarm of the things inside him, and he wasn’t sure if he liked it or not.

You were watching him expectantly, almost like you were challenging him. “Go on,” your eyes seemed to be saying, “try it.”

He did. Your lips were softer than he’d expected, and just as warm as your hands. You made a sound somewhere in the realm of a sigh as his hand slid down to rest on your shoulder, pushing gently towards him, your own fingers running over his jaw to brush along the back of his neck. He couldn’t believe he’d waited this long to kiss you, and now that he’d finally taken the plunge, he never wanted to stop.

But he had to breathe, unfortunately, and so did you.

“You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do that,” you whispered. You were still close enough that he could feel the words against his skin.

“You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do that,” he replied.

You laughed, a soft, breathy sound, and closed the tiny gap once more. “I love you,” you murmured between kisses, “and I’m sorry it took me almost dying to say it.”

“Yeah, I’m sorry about that too.”

The door handle clicked, the hinges squealing. “Ok, so I ran into the doctor on the way in— woah.”

Dean stood up so fast he almost overbalanced.

Sam was standing in the doorway with a disposable coffee cup in each hand, his mouth hanging open as he stared from you to Dean and back again.

You cleared your throat. “Hi, Sam.”

He shut his mouth, shoving the cups into Dean’s hands as he crossed the room and bent to hug you with a muttered “thank God.”

“Watch it,” you warned, “I’m injured.” But your arms snaked around his back anyway, your voice muffled as you pressed your face into his neck.

“You’re never allowed to scare us like that again,” Sam said firmly.

Your eyes found Dean’s over Sam’s shoulder, and you smiled. “I’m not really planning on it, don’t worry.”

Sam just laughed. “How’re you feeling?” he asked when he finally let you go.

“Ok,” you nodded, then frowned. “Hungry.”

Sam glanced at Dean, who shrugged. He’d gotten bored some time in the morning, and the packet of pudding that had been left on your bedside table along with a bottle of water had been practically begging to be tasted. He’d wondered if you’d wake up before they brought a replacement, he’d even felt a little bad eating your food, but he was hungry, dammit, and when Sam had left he’d said he would come back “later” which meant “tonight”. And that was too long for Dean to wait. He also didn’t have any money on him, and wouldn’t have left your side for the cafeteria when the pudding was right there.

“What?” you asked.

“He ate the pudding they left you,” Sam said. Dean never should have mentioned it, but he’d been desperate to get Sam to bring him something and it had felt convincing over the phone.

Dean glared at his brother and the coffees – which were very noticeably not the fast food he’d had in mind. “You try living in that chair for a day, see how long you can go without.” Then he turned to you. “You didn’t miss much, don’t worry.”

“Well, I’m hungry!” you protested, crossing your arms and looking for all the world like a petulant toddler.

Sam’s words about asking you out echoed in his mind.

“I’ll buy you dinner,” he said. “At an actual restaurant, not a fast food place. As soon as they let you outta here, alright? In the meantime…” He reached for the bottle of water, handing it to you with an apologetic shrug. It was better than nothing.

You wrinkled your nose at him. “This is a pretty shit first date.”

“I’ll make it up to you,” he said. Then, on second thoughts, “It’s not a first date, Sam’s here.”

“Geez,” Sam muttered, “sorry. And after I got you a coffee too.”

“Did you get me one?” you asked hopefully.

“No,” he said slowly. “But you can have mine if you want?”

You sighed. “I don’t like it how you do. But thanks,” you added with a smile.

“Sorry, I just wasn’t expecting you to be awake.”

“Have a little faith, Sam.”

He smiled, glancing between you and Dean.

“You owe me a coffee, and you owe me a dinner,” you continued before he could say anything. Dean thanked you silently. He didn’t really want a shovel talk from his own brother right now, which he could see Sam was just dying to dish out. He wondered if you’d be getting one. Probably, but he had no doubts that it would be less “shovel” more “talk”.

“Soon as you’re fixed up,” he said. “I promise.”

“And it’ll be a date?”

“Sweetheart, it’ll be the best first date you’ve ever been on. Trust me.”

You just grinned, ignoring Sam’s fake-disgusted sigh. “Ok.”

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tortellini-time · 25 days

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My dnd campaign dashboard simulator

🌒 waterdeepfan5 Follow

Tbh i think people who think calinox is problematic really need to step away and being so toxic in the fanbase, adventuring has a very involved history and its really disrespectful to imply that :/

💜 bardsareoverrated Follow

bestie he dissolved people

🌒 waterdeepfan5 Follow

Hurtful thing to say but I’d expect nothing more from a WOSHA supporter :////

💜 bardsareoverrated Follow

GIRL YOU MEAN THE SAFETY REGULATIONS?

10,558 notes

🧜‍♀️ Vespaeisntreal919

Sorry for posting so much about Hornsblade family conspiracies lately. It turns out that I was getting mold poisoning from mire? Anyway I moved apartments and im good now. Check your walls y'all

#glad to move on from this fandom yall are TOXIC lmaoooo

659 notes

Ferport-girlie-deactivated18540927

RIP hepia you would have loved moon arson

🥺 prettypirate Follow

HERITAGE POST

📝 moonhater2323 Follow

How does this have less than 100k notes you could literally not avoid this post back in the 4180’s lmao

82,170 notes

🌄 timehater4ever Follow

People who go to taras as tourists are so cringe :/

#Like thats a god's domain, you cant go just for the shops

6 notes

🎀 Sillywizardhour Follow

I missed my wizardry test yesterday! :[[[[ Going to try to go back in time and retake it wish me luck! <333

🎀 Sillywizardhour Follow

taras

112 notes

🐌 snailsandspells

UGHHHH my boss is the WORSTTTT, i got eldritch madness from looking at the moon and hes not even giving me sick leave

#i hate it here

1 note

👑 tumblrsfavoritedeitiytournament Follow

deities and gods - FINAL

Erkytimbers-steve-seeresults

🙈 chewingonrocks Follow

Of course these are the finalists lmao this website doesnt take anything seriously, i wish people would stop voting for these two just because of the memes and vote for one that actually does something like the mother of monsters

🤡 chaosforthebit Follow

Uhh dude erky timbers literally the god of dumb memes, idk what you were expecting #erkysweep

🐬 seasideloser Follow

I love the implication here that people still would have voted for the mother of monsters when she literally tried to fill several towns with bugbears 😭 like that was a pretty significant thing that happened

🍓 sapphicforthemoon Follow

And? God forbid women do anything

#why’d you have to pit two bad bitches against each otherr #anyways voting steve for my pet mimic

80,027 notes

overthisnonsense-deactivated131341341

Dot stans are literally so annoying. like her music is ok at best

🎸 radiohater

rip to this fallen solider o7

20,309 notes

⭐️ tryingmybest

Hi guys sorry I haven’t been posting lately got teleported to the benthic plane through a magic rift 💀 hoping to get my fic updated next week anyways :-) wish me luck lol

0 notes

@alaskannymph @cyclicalaberration @robot-aliens @mothecho @sweetnsourhearts

#my dnd campaign #Spent way too long on this haha

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vole-mon-amour · 1 day

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chapter 67:

those looks and smiles at each other. :')

lmao. you tell them, Sebastian. a bit too late, but you just gotta tease your master, huh.

more reading under cut.

chapter 68:

this is so CUTE. it's like they're home but this is even cuter somehow. the devil has to be a nanny to all of those kids & and it's cute not because of the kids, but because of the way Seb is drawn? his expression and the pose are doing something to me.

these two, I swear.

chapter 69:

honestly, what's with this? like, in the anime it makes zero sense. doesn't make much more sense in the manga, either.

never thought i'd see Sebastian mad, annoyed, and tired because of some homework. dude, you're literally a demon. you were doing all of that at home with easy while also taking care of the staff. pull yourself together.

that little left remark is hilarious and should've been in the show.

Yeah... I would like to see his real teaching method, too. I can't unsee this in a sexual context. *Professor* Michaelis. The arched back, the position of the hand. The look from under his lashes. This moment in the anime should've been sluttier.

"if you order me" so basically Seb wants to be his lap kitty on a short leash.

Ciel is so smug & Seb just likes being ordered around and be his (and spend time with him).

"give me written proof" now THAT makes sense. did I miss this or they didn't add this to the anime?

chapter 70:

what I don't understand is what's the point of being someone's fag? like, you're a butler in school where you still need to do your homework, go to classes, all of that? couldn't be me.

this? is sexual(ized).

also, all those "pretty boys"? long(er) hair, feminine beauty. even the name, "Joanne". you're telling me that's a boy? there's a pattern, just like Ciel in a dress. Maurice, too. straight up a female.

this is a cute moment tbh.

this is so wholesome. a friend, almost. though yeah, in another situation i'd ship.

The Husbands (TM) are regretting every second of this, lol.

Soma literally said, "Hey! Get back here!" I feel bad for the elephant.

"you bastard, I shouldn't have called you" "pretending not to know them" lmaoooo. #married

chapter 71:

Soma, you're soooo sneaky. x) So adorable though.

"I'm free!" lmaooo

gotcha! asshole.

oh, Ciel. x) if he was sleeping, he could've went to bed at least.

I need this piece of shit to die immediately. where's Sebastian? jfc, that last one throws me back to when Ciel was raped.

ugly ass bitch. you deserve this.

Seb, you chose this. x)

#kuroshitsuji #natisreading

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ivyial · 8 months

Note

Okay, I just saw your other ask about leshley/eagleone and felt like I had to get in on this because ever since RE4Make came out, I've been going crazy over this ship. I have always found it cute in RE4 OG, but now it's driving me crazy. I cannot understand how many people miss the many implications that Leon is trying to flirt during certain parts of the game. Like seriously, come on, pals, he's being so awkward, trying to sound cool and give compliments that end up sounding weirder than he intended. And I don't know if it's just me that noticed this, but I find it funny how Leon talks to Ashley in certain moments like it's the easiest thing to do; then, in other parts, he really has no clue how to speak to her. Does that not scream attraction to anyone?

i'm with you on this one. i don't know how people miss EVERYTHING about them. like they don't even go "oh?" at times when they're playing. it probably depends on the mindset you have when you're playing. if you're hyperfocused on the action, maybe you'll miss it. idk. on social media, there are two broad types of people who have negative reactions when it comes to leon/ashley:

1. aeon shippers (mostly, can be other shippers as well, but they're mostly chill because they themselves get forced into a corner by aeon stans) who think it threatens their ship

2. people who are fiercely anti-romance when it comes to whatever media they consume and consider it to be dumb and actively making a good piece of media worse (because in their eyes, romance is a lowly preoccupation to have)

and both groups are super bitter for no reason lmaoooo. you might have noticed a tendency in media discourse recently on social media that is very anti-romance - a few weeks ago, it became a whole thing on twitter because of the bear (the tv show) and the ship between sydney and carmy, to the point where even official media outlets started talking about it. romance is considered dumb. everything that contains romance is essentially a bad soap opera. blah blah blah we're all too smart for that. there's a very strong, almost puritanical anti-sex sentiment going around at the moment as well, and i wish it was just some isolated issue within fandoms overpopulated by young teens, but people lost their minds over two sex scenes in oppenheimer for god's sake. and if i had the time and willpower and knowledge, i'd turn this into a discussion about how that ties into humans being obsessed with moving away from every single instinct that they have, but well.

i also agree with the second part of your ask, about leon's attitude towards ashley. tbh, leon can't flirt for shit: most of the time, he's awkward (RE2R, the fence scene with claire: i can never tell if he's attempting to flirt, or if he's just awkward because there's a cute girl right in front of him) or even downright unfunny (was he trying to flirt with jill in death island? was he trying to lighten the mood? idk man leon is a bit of a whore so). he tries to flirt all the time: we got shen may in infinite darkness, ada, etc. we know he isn't smooth.

so one thing that really sticks out in RE4R is his tone with ashley, in two specific instances (maybe more): the one i mentioned in my previous ask, when he says "i can catch you", and when he sees ashley asleep on the bed in chapter 13 (and calls out to her). these are two very intense and high-stress situations where he kind of reverts back to RE2R leon (nick does a great job at conveying the difference in maturity in leon's voice in both games). he's very distressed. why does that matter? because fucking shouting ashley's name when there are two enemies 10 meters away (we know that, he doesn't, but the island is riddled with ganados, so why would he even try?) is the stupidest decision a special agent could make. and yet he does it anyway. there are other instances of leon being in a similar situation, yet he still retains that deeper tone of his - see his first encounter with krauser in chapter 11.

and it's not just because he's doing his job, which is what one of my friends argued, because you don't go around flirting with the person you're tasked to rescue for shits and giggles. not to mention, that's the president's daughter. if he was just doing his job, he'd stick to the plan, be stoic and get her home and that's it. that's what's required of him. implying that the first daughter is hot as fuck and that he doesn't usually enjoy his regular missions nearly as much as he does when he's with her isn't part of his job description. there's a difference between being a decent guy and not treating her like cargo, and overtly flirting with her.

i think he's also very awkward with her at first because he's toeing the line between what's acceptable and what isn't, so he can figure out if there is grounds for flirting and it's not wholly unwanted on ashley's part. then you get that pep talk in the castle, which is when they really start to get comfortable with each other and when he attempts some physical contact that isn't just 100% necessary. she reacts well, which explains why he takes it further in chapter 9. he spends the rest of the game painfully distressed and by chapter 16, they're all over each other (jetski + taking her hand to run to the elevator - leon, the girl is smart, she knows how to run and follow you).

leon has a crush. plain and simple. he doesn't know how to deal with it, except for the few times when he does and the flirting is technically reciprocated. idk how people can't notice the plain signs of attraction, even in a generation that is as recluse and introverted as mine tends to be, but they're very obvious once you start paying attention.

#leon kennedy #ashley graham #eagleone #leshley #resident evil 4 #resident evil

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louandhazaf · 4 months

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ANNUAL WRITING SELF EVALUATION 2023

List of works published this year:

Wanted: Dog Walker // Louis needs a dog walker. / Harry answers the ad. A Social Construct // Five times Harry and Louis try to lose their virginity and one time they finally do.

Tongue Tied // Louis’ new bestie placed a hand on his shoulder; he turned with a sway and looked into his blue eyes. ”What do you wish?” / The world spun for a moment, and Louis shrugged. It was easy. The only thing he wanted. “I wish that I could tell Harry that I love him, instead of getting all tongue tied and chickening out.” / The Irishman winked. “You never know, your wish may just come true.” / “From your lips to God’s ears, mate.” He gave the man a hug. “I gotta go before my Uber leaves me.” / He stumbled to the door, and that was the last thing he remembered from the night. ‘tis the damn season // Harry returns to her small hometown over the holiday season and starts to think about the road not taken.

Work you are most proud of (and why): ‘tis the damn season because I have always said that there was absolutely no way I could write an advent fic day by day. And yet, when Nov 30th came around and I only had two chapters, my fomo won over my fear of failure and I thought I’d give it a try, because the worst that would happen is that I wouldn’t finish it, which would’ve been fine! But then with the help of everyone who read along, I actually did it!

A favorite excerpt of your writing: unlike most years, when I quickly scrolled through my works, nothing specific jumped out, so I’ll just say that I really liked how ch 6 rolled into ch 7 in ‘tis the damn season!

Share or describe a favorite review you received: literally every single one.

A time when writing was really, really hard: oh boy. Okay. so if you go back and read my 2022 recap, and 2021, you’ll see that writing has consistently been hard for me for a few years. So, this year I told myself not to worry about it, that I could not write a single thing and not feel bad about it. I didn’t do a ton of writing this year, but having the internal pressure off sure helped. Even though I really miss the way it used to be.

A scene or character you wrote that surprised you: I’ll say Zayn in ‘tis the damn season, because I didn’t have a role for her when I started, and I really liked her as minor threat slash Louis’ bff and sometimes hookup. I want someone to write a story in her pov. lmaoooo How did you grow as a writer this year: I really tried to get rid of my perfectionist tendencies and tried to write without putting pressure on myself.

How do you hope to grow next year: i dont even know, tbh. I’ll be very happy if I match my 2023 fic count.

Who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer (could be another writer or beta or cheerleader or muse etc etc): I adore everything that @disgruntledkittenface put out this year. The way she keeps pushing herself is really inspiring.

Anything from your real life show up in your writing this year: ummm, I guess the ‘moving back home thing’... idk. Nothing i wrote this year hit particularly close to home.

Any new wisdom you can share with other writers: i love you. please keep going!

Any projects you’re looking forward to starting (or finishing) in the new year: what I would give to be able to write the next installment of Swallow My Words. Thank you so much to @kingsofeverything @allwaswell16 @lululawrence and @haztobegood for tagging me! @phdmama want to join in the fun? @disgruntledkittenface did i miss yours? anyone else??? (also, here’re my responses from 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, 2020, 2021, 2022)

#whinging on about my writing

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azsazz · 2 months

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CC3 Anon

spoilers under cut

Hiii it’s CC anon. THANK GOD YOU RESPONDED NO ONE ELSE I KNOW IS READING THIS BOOK 😭

I finished CC3 last night and yeah. I enjoyed the pacing at the beginning of this book more than the first two books because we’re already in the thick of the climax and don’t have to build up suspense again but omg it dragged in the middle.

I did not care for Ithan at all I’m sorry. And yes he hasn’t been a pro sun all player in YEARS idk why she keeps bringing it up. I think someone stumbled and he caught her and Sarah went “his sunball reflexes” HES A WOLF HE WAS ALWAYS GOING TO HAVE QUICK REFLEXES. Had him running up and down to resurrect Sigrid and in the end it DIDNT EVEN MATTER.

Lmaoooo Ithan mostly acted ago appropriate if I think about it. He's like 20 I'm assuming since he's around college age. He's def not my favorite character either tbh. Love how everything fell into his lap tho. Literally anytime he was mentioned so was snuball it was so fucking dumb.

I know you like Tharion but can he do anything right omg. Ithan carried him with the Viper Queen. Sathia carried him in front of the Ocean Queen 😭 I WAS SO PISSED ABOUT THE ANTIDOTES OMG and then Ithan went and did the same. I see why they are best friends like wow stupid really follows stupid.

LMAO I love Tharion, yes he'd definitely dumb and needs to make better decisions but I liked how witty he was in the first book. He really needs to stop with the whole woe is me act tho. omg the antidotes shit don't even get me started. half of the stuff that she wrote for the book didn't even matter in the end. like, we could've cut this damn book down 300 pages tbh, nothing would've been missed because nothing made sense even.

I don’t hate Bryce. She did annoy me though. I hated when Aelin wouldn’t tell people about her plans and could not stand it from Bryce here. Her yelling at Hunt about having to face the consequences of their actions. I’m like dude you went to another world and came back powered up. Hunt stayed and was tortured brutally like what? I know why she doesn’t want him to have guilt about it but it’s his 3rd time going through this and failing. And now he has more to lose. Of course he would be feeling a type of way.

I do not like her at all lol. The whole not telling people plans things pissed me off because her loud mouth is not like that. AND THEN SHE HAS THE AUDACITY TO TELL HUNT "OH YOU DONT EVEN WANT TO BE HERE" girl maybe if you told someone the fuckin plan they would feel a bit more confident about going through with it for fucks sake. she's a mean girl and i can't stand her and i don't think she's funny at all she is so cringe to me haha. HUNT HAS ALREADY TRIED GOING AGAINST THE ASTERI AND HE WAS TORTURED FOR 200 YEARS?! Then he gets freed and has to do it all over again?! Like, why are we yelling at this man? of course he's weary.

I’m not the biggest fan of her swagger at times. Like sometimes we don’t need the quippy (read: unfunny) one liners :/

LITERALLY

The STAKES???? Bryce should’ve stayed dead! It would have been a lot more impactful. Even the torturing scenes kind of didn’t hit as much after the fact cause everyone can just regrow their limbs and be fine. No one had a single nightmare about what happened to them? I thought we would see something like that beyond “a glimmer of darkness in his eyes” idk :/

The entire "someone dying only to be brought to life on the next page" has definitely fucking worn off now but sjm apparently can't see that. she created a world with 50+ characters only to not use half of them when it matters. so stupid. Also, i don't remember them being able to regrow limbs tbh.

Maybe the book would’ve been too long but I was genuinely shocked we didn’t get more scenes of anyone on the actual battlefield. We were mostly in the palace after Bryce and Hunt teleported, and then the moment with Lidia and the sprites. But maybe the book would’ve been too toooo long idk.

Yeah there really was only like 60 pages of the end scene. but as soon as i saw the word space i actually almost DNFd it because what the actual fuck was that.

I will say I really like how the male friendships are genuine. I honestly can’t tell you that Bryce, Fury, and June are friends LMAO. (I’m exaggerating but I do kinda agree with this) .

Yeah, i love Ruhn, dec, and flynn's relationship. i think sjm tries to be like "oh yeah girl power, strong fmc's" but there's no women in the books? and they all don't like each other? like danika, bryce, fury, and juniper seemed like mean girls? girls that didn't give a fuck about anyone else? idk. the way that the men to women ratio in her books is very interesting to me. and the fack that EVERY man that comes across bryce thinks she's the most gorgeous girl to have ever lived...fuck off with that logic.

My girl Jesiba :////// She was my favorite for sure. I'm indifferent about her lol. Her entire storyline i feel was just made up like two months ago so she could connect to the other series lol

I do agree with what you said about Bryce (I legit almost wrote Aelin LMFAO) . I was not expecting her to just say no rulers for the Fae at all. But I guess a Senate would be more democratic.

SO STUPID. The Senate (starwars)

Im sure there will be a fourth book but I am so uninterested in Tharion and Ariadne like who caresssssssss. If Im interested in Ithan, it’s because I want to see more Perry. I wonder how connected this world and ACOTAR will remain.

I honestly hope it ends at 4 books. I think that would be a perfect ending because there's four houses. no need for more im already sick of it. yeah i liked perry too. i hope they're no longer connected lol.

Ruhn and Lidia :) but HE LEGIT SHOT HER?? I know she was acting irrationally because of her sons and he wanted to make sure she didn’t get herself killed but then he shot her. Like okay 😭. I think my favorite couples are Bryce’s parents and Lidia and Ruhn. Ruhn just seems so hot 😭.

Ruhn is a winner for sure for sure.

I’m writing too much and I’m scared this app will just shut down so I’ll quit here. I still think the first book is the worst one in this series. But I had fun with this one (despite my hang ups) and I’m glad it’s over (for now :/).

THANKS FOR LETTING ME RANT!!!

THANKS FOR LETTING ME RANT TOO!

CC anon!! I went to goodreads to read reviews of the book and I genuinely cannot believe how many 5 star ratings this book got. I mean, I can and can’t believe it. Atp anything Sarah puts out will average at least a 4 star rating on there and sell a crap ton.

I think people just give her that rating because she's popular, not because they read lol. oh yeah, why do you think she released 5 different bonus chapters. talk about a greedy cash grab. that mentality kinda makes me sick im not even going to lie.

I was reading through the 2-star reviews and someone mentioned their shock at how quickly Ruhn and Lidia resolved their issues which I totally agree with. She said she hated him and would never forgive him for what he did, and she was right! I know why Ruhn did it, but I genuinely still cannot believe he actually shot her, even if she was gonna be okay. That’s a terrible time to be worrying about a wound like that when you want to be at full strength to fight for your children.

Yeah half of the plot lines felt stupid? like what? he couldn't have stopped her any other way...really? i feel like she did not think this book through as well as she thought she did tbh. seems to be her thing these days.

(Even when Hunt said he hated Bryce for stopping him from killing Celestina, I was like Oh!)

OMG THAT WAS ACTUALLY WILD. YEAH OKAY. I TOTALLY BELIEVE THEY'RE MATES.

The reviewer said Sarah should have left their relationship on the rocks so we could get Ruhn groveling in the fourth book, and I can’t get that idea out of my head. ESPECIALLY with their bonus scene. Idk if you’ve read it but I was like ??? I like them as a couple and I like their story, but it did seem like it was all patched up insanely quickly. Like if you shot me then the very LEAST you could do is get my kids to safety. That alone would not necessarily make me forgive you.

I didn't read their bonus chapter but i can't believe they moved in with each other literally after like two days of knowing each other in real life. bro, you just found out she has two kids? you don't know the woman at all lol. no, everyone has to have a happy ending by the last page of the book or else. lol. no suspense.

#cc3 spoilers #cc3 #hofas #hofas spoilers

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