#I want nothing but the best for you guys

[ylissebian]

FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL 👽🥀

#i love dalien so much u guys… #i really DID feel like i was sending my son off to war. move over dnp i want custody. #do i have a parasocial relationship with a sim? well yes. and that is okay <3 #gamingmas #dan and phil #dnp #dnpgames #dalien howlter #!!!MY SWEET LAD. #dapg sims #dan howell #phil lester #im so invested in dalien’s high school adventures. i felt real pain in my heart when he went to eat lunch w the principal #DALIEN I WANT NOTHING BUT THE BEST FOR YOU #he would love the cheerard outfit i know this to be true

[inkly-heart]

Do you have a group discord server? If others want to chill and interact with you. Just wondering

That aside just hoping you’re doing okay Blastic. Still, if you’re not your gotta a lot people care about you.

I look forward to seeing how the rest of the game goofs.

—goofball anon

I don't and sadly I don't think I will make one. It would be fun to interact with people who enjoys my work and wants to chat with me but I just feel it would be too much work for me to handle a discord server. So at least for now I'm not planning to make one.

#and how I've been doing?? #there been ups and downs #maybe bit better?? At least compared to what it was when this month started #I felt so numb for some reason #I just wanted to lie in bed and do nothing because nothing was making me happy. Not even drawing or playing games #I do still get these kind of days but it hasn't been that bad and I have got some amount motivation back to draw again at least #wanting to play games though still have been very low #but I'm taking small steps #I'm also sorry for not having much good news and that I've been so quiet nowadays #I just been struggling a lot what to say and anxiety isn't making things any easier #but I want to thank everyone who are still here hanging around and enjoying my work #even though I have these struggles I'm happy that you guys still want to support me<33 Thank you<33 #not sure did I word these right but I tried my best #and I will also do my best not to give up and keep on going 🌱 #ask #anon

[mishapen-dear]

OH. okay so normally i dont touch discourse with a 20 ft pole, but this has been niggling at my brain tonight and i finally realized why

the people who are mad at qbbh for the memory loss and “dodging consequences” dont understand that he doesnt want to dodge consequences. Like they cant know that, they werent focused on him when he was literally feeding himself to the soul vultures and planning his eventual imprisonment and also. The Many Many Many hints he made towards suicide/sacrifice/Just Fucking Dying.

ccbbh is a subtle roleplayer, he’s been building this shit up for two whole months- it was day FIVE of the eggs going missing that he resolved to do whatever it took (hurting his friends) to get the eggs back. It was day three that he followed in dapper’s footsteps and started feeding himself to the soul vultures (and gaining a Massive headwound beneath his hood in the process- you can only see it if you go on namemc and remove the layers). He’s got impaired judgement. Even the memory issues arent a new thing- i cant remember exactly when they started, but one of the first big moments i remmeber was september 30th where he spent an hour falling into a delusional frenzy searching his base for cameras that he forgot he asked aypierre to plant.

The super murder of purgatory and the memory loss afterwards probably all feels very sudden for people who havent been following his story, but as someone who has been- all of this has been true to character. The only cheap swings he’s made have been combat-based in purgatory, and even the motive for those was built up in rp.

People are calling for consequences, but he has alrwady been experiencing self-inflicted consequences for months. The blue on his usual outfit is blood. This recent memory loss isnt a restart to get away with the atrocities - it is yet another consequence of his egg-protecting complexes and the ways he punishes himself for failing them.

he is NOT a moral character. he’s a demon hiding in plain site. he has eaten people. he has killed people. he understands the cruelty of his actions, and the consequences of them for the loved ones of his victims. but it matters when that harm is being done to his loved ones. he’ll still do it, because he will do anything for the eggs, but it matters, and that means that he has already started the process of self-inflicting those much-demanded consequences

#anyone who isnt a qbbh makn please extend some sympathy for us. our guy is being misunderstood again #so if people seem twitchier than usual that probbaly plays a factor #but if it ever gets annoying be rest assured he is doing his very best to train us in media literacy #and also the block and filter buttons are your friends #and qbbh mains join me in the genuinely freeing revelation that they have just. strawmanned him yet again #i feel like youve gotta be able to understand a character to truly hate them #and no one (not even us oh my fucking god) really understand him #and thus the vitrol means nothing and i am free of all woes #anyway tho genuinely if you want to know more about this cube im willing to talk about him #i have Credentials #one of my posts was dono’d to the cc almost word for word and he called me a know it all #qsmp #qsmp badboyhalo #discourse #<- mentioned #an interestinf discussion could be had too about xyz character Deserving xyz thing #and really people in general Deserving xyz thing #but i think that is a wasp nest i dont know enough about to join swatting #i ngeed. to go to bed

[ganondoodle]

is it too much of a reach to say that zelda being reduced to basically an object to farm items from in totk just kinda adds more salt to the wound of how badly shes treated?

#ganondoodles talks #zelda #totk #i know im nitpicking #but i have talked about the big problems alot already #and now i start to see the smaller thingy that dont feel good #i guess you could see it as well if she wasnt farmable for items it would be weird compared to the other dragons #or that you are supposed to realize that you have been farming items from your best friend the whole time is to mean something #or maybe its just a game mechanic #i knew super early that the dragon was zelda #and when i saw i need items from her to upgrade my armor i was like .... im not gonna shoot out heR TEETH WTF #good thing she remembers nothing i guess #so she doesnt have to cope with the fact that link kept shooting off her scales - claws - teeth and horns #god i just want to see her have agency for once #and no i dont count begging unnamed faceless champion mcguffin guys to do a swear or dragonfying herself when she had no other option #thats not a character moving the plot but the plot shoving around a character imo #i want to see her go around HER hyrule and talk to people- solve mysteries- get more competent at defending herself- actively doing anythin #gnawing on wood as we speak

[pretentiouswreckingball]

I need pathetic Regulus so bad you guys, I want him pining after James, writing in his silly little diary how good he looks today, I want him daydreaming about their wedding and drawing hearts at the margins of his notebooks with Regulus Arcturus Potter over and over again

#do you see my vision? I know Regulus can be portrait as this cold distant guy who lets nothing show in his face but I’m #i want regulus being so obvious about his devotion. I want him to salivate at the sigh of James and be after him like a sick puppy #i want him to try to play it cool and fail spectacularly #basically just Regulus having and embarrassing big-ass crush on his brother’s best friend #who in my mind is also Regulus’ in some degree #and then i want James being a bit oblivious about it until one day the light catches Regulus in a certain way and…. that’s all it takes. #he’s doomed. #a lot of rambling tonight so sorry #loops blabbers

[phosphophylight-of-my-life]

oshi no ko aqua is such a fun character bc by most counts he's a more than decent guy.

in his first life he regularly visited hospital inpatients who had no visitors. he was genuinely happy and excited to help Ai deliver her babies, because he wants her to be happy on her own terms. he saves Akane simply because he can, and gets angry at the staff on her behalf. he doesn't stop at saving her life and spends sleepless nights turning around her public image. at that point there was nothing in it for him to keep akane around, she was just a person he was able to help and wanted to help.

by most counts he's a pretty decent guy who steps up when people need him most, except. except he's also a guy who really wants to kill his dad and that makes him manipulate people somewhat often and this is somehow not entirely at odds with his instinct to help others

#oshi no ko #like he's a doctor i can rly respect yknow #except for the patricide thing #gorou said do no harm unless it's my dad #also the way that gorou regularly visit patients is something SARINA has to tell the audience and not gorou #bc to gorou is nothing worth mentioning #for quite a while i was like man gorou is kind of sleazy for only visiting sarina esp when she's so young and vulnerable #but he visits the others also... sarina was just the most special patient to him because she introduced him to ai and also #because she was a kid whose parents never showed up #also SPOILERS FOR LIKE CH90+ OR SMTHING BELOW #the way aqua doesnt let akane dirty her hands like ok aqua we get it you want the best for everyone who isnt your dad #wipes tear someone get him therapy hes a decent guy who's ruining his life #also the way he is conscious of how he's playing w akane's feelings and tries very hard to be honest with her and to do her right #like sigh okay aqua i GUESS i cant hate you #and that one ghosting kana arc where i wanted to beat him up and then he was like i dont want to drag kana into this & he looked terrified #like SIGH. OKAY. FINE AQUA i cant hate you after all #like apart from the patricide (which is big know) the biggest downside to his personality is how cold he is #he pushes ppl away all the time and is just borderline rude #but like idk i feel like thats a byproduct of his 'i plan to go to jail for patricide and dont want to drag others down' mindset #which is like... well. you can't hate him for that.. he's looking out for others in his own way

[astranauticus]

stultifera navis rerun AKA thinking about Iberia hours again because a lot of the Iberians have such fascinating relationships with the concept of home but specifically Thorns and Lumen are eating at my brain. like where do you call home when the place that is your home Just Fucking Hates You? Elysium's rewinding breeze specifically makes a point to hammers home how differently Iberia treats its Liberi and its Aegir

(which is especially interesting since this comes right after a conversation where Purestream commented on how despite Leizi being a high ranking government official, there are still some experiences that are universal for all Yanese people - because the experience of what Iberia itself is like isnt universal for all Iberians)

But all that being said, Thorns also straight up states that Aegir is not his home, and yeah, how could it be? How could a place you've never been to, never truly known, ever be your home? How could it ever feel like a home?

so where do you go when the place that you are from hates your people and the place your people are from is completely unfamiliar and alien to you? Thorns' answer at the end of the conversation with Aya is: my home is where i chose it to be. my home is where there are people I care about and people who care about me

in the complete opposite direction, Lumen's oprec asks: why do you still stay in a place that wants you gone? because the people of Gran Faro like Jordi well enough but when push comes to shove, they will want the only Aegir in town gone

and yet, when Rald the messenger offers him a chance to leave Jordi turns him down and when he's forced to escape Gran Faro after the people there literally try to send him to his death (or worse) at the hands of the Inquisitors he keeps trying to go back because like everyone in stultifera navis, Jordi is clinging to his own dreams of a golden age

but the shape of that dream is unique to every character and for Jordi, his dreams are deeply, inseparably bound to the Eye of Iberia, the legacy his parents left behind

and it's this dream of becoming someone great, of bringing about that golden age that his parents devoted their lives to help create that ties Jordi to this nothing town because despite everything, despite the mistrust of the townsfolk and the hostility of the Inquisition and the danger from the ocean, he simply cannot leave it behind

(or, because i personally dislike the official translation,)

"I just see this place as my home"

so yeah. not sure what overall point i was trying to make here i'm just. deeply in love with these stories about chosing what is and isn't your home, of saying you will not call a place your home because it has given you no reason to or saying you consider a place your home even though it has given you every reason not to. deeply unwell about them <3

#arknights #asto speaks #not much of an essay writer i just keep thinking about them and i need to force other people to think about them too #thorns story fucks me up bc like. this whole almost found family adjacent idea of like #maybe home isnt something decided by your birth but something you can chose based on what truly matters to you #it just gets to me. i guess. #jordi gets to me in a completely different direction there's nothing personal about it i just find his story *fascinating* #just a guy. a completely normal guy. an absolute nobody caught up in these dreams of greatness while also fully aware of his own normalcy #but never letting either of those overshadow the other. never losing that self awareness or that fuckin obsessive determination #god. what a Character #i love jordi so much like genuinely #i joke a lot about him being just a Guy but thats also kinda like the best thing about him #the fact that he is the way that he is and does all the things he does despite being just a Guy #gently holds #for context i was so hyped about new iberia lore when sn was announced i read the whole thing as soon as it dropped on cn server #cuz someone uploaded all the story sections to bilibili right after it came out #and '我只是把这里当作自己的故乡啊' fucking hit me SO HARD #in like the greater context of elysium demanding to know why hes risking his life in like 5 different ways to return to gran faro #because yeah jordi just doesnt want to leave his home but like we the audience knows the full *weight* of what that home means to him #and the weight of the dreams that made him chose to see Gran Faro as his home and to refuse to let go of that #thats why i like the original a lot more than the translation i think like it really emphasises that active *choice*. #this is the place jordi has *decided* to see as his home and he knows what that means and what it means to him #side note the part on thorns might not actually age well depending on whether hg decides to ever release more aulus lore #i mean i'll gladly take the L if it means more aulus and/or thorns lore like #i just wanna know what (if anything) is tying him to iberia yknow #ak #iberiaposting

[cringefail-clown]

well thats just fucking criminal

#bro strider #the signless #i was just thinking about them like “wow id fucking read some brosign rn they could have such an interesting dynamic fun to explore” #and theres almost NOTHING THERE #clawing at the walls #cmon guys cmon troll jegus vs the worst fucking guy alive #IT COULD BE SO JUICY AND INTERESTING I WANT THEM UNDER THE MICROSCOPE #the tragedy of wanting someone to do better but ultimately even you trying your best is not enough #AUGHHHHHH

[dizzybevvie]

"Kingdom Hearts is so complicated" "Nomura made it up as he went along" "KH makes no sense" Have you considered that Riku is 15 and autistic and gay bc if you do I think itll change things

#domt get me wrong a lot of kh is fucking ridiculous and some of it is way too complex but like #bare bones? Rikus motivations are so real to me like Riku is such a realised character #Giving him hugs #If sora at any point in the game was like “Riku youre my best friend and i value you” nothing wouldve ever happened /hj #Obviously overhearing the dock convo with Kairi definitely triggered a fight or flight response in him #and him being like “Winner gets to get with Kairi 😼” and then as soon as the race is over being like “lol it was just a joke bro haha” #And him trying so hard to be a cool guy (which works tbf bc sora idolises him but is still evident) #Him tossing Sora a paopu and sayin “c'mon. you know you want to try it.” eithout ever saying Kairi to test the waterz #his main priority after opening the door to darkness being making sure Sora comes with him and feeling betrayed when he doesnt #and then in traverse town running when Sora has the chance to abandon him for his new friends #and then maleficent is like Lol he replaced u <3 and riku is gay and autistic and 15 about it #I care so deeply about kh1 riku. Hes just a little guy and he just needed a hug #apollo says stuff #UGHHHH #Its feeling so so sad about Riku Kingdom hearts hours #riku kingdom hearts #kingdom hearts #kh riku #soriku #beverly says stuff

[danwhobrowses]

So after four months, Bell's Hells are off the moon

0.5/5 Stars - Some of the locals were nice but activities were shit and needs new management.

But what's this? Aabria with a steel chair!? She's probably cackling looking at the socials right now

#critical role #critical role spoilers #cr3 spoilers #cr spoilers #cr3 #cr3e92 #bell's hells #bells hells #crown keepers #aabria iyengar #glad they got to go off on Liliana though she needed to be told what for #drop them all at the key why don't you though? Not exactly helpful #four months for us but it was like a weekend trip for them - a terrible not fun at all weekend trip #the swap was extremely unexpected yes but we did want to see Dorian #but honestly Lolth what the shit? Are all the betrayer gods scheming? Aren't we all on the same side with Predathos? #to be fair I was dreading more bitter angst so I'm glad the Hells are comforting one another #but as an Ashton fan I wanted more of how they're feeling than the usual 'Imogen Laudna and Orym are sad' stuff #they lost their best friend after all - let Taliesin use his wordsmithery #nothing against the three but they do carry a lot of the narrative because of how intertwined their emotional states are with the plot #and ofc as a shipper I wanted Fearne and Ashton to comfort one another but hopefully next episode #but Orym's sending was tragic the lil guy needs Dorian right now so we better not kill him #big drider fear vision though no thank you no más non merci instant transmission outta there #we're either killing or writing off Opal for Deni$e it feels but poor Aimee is on her lonesome up there #if you see this hi Aabria! Unlikely but still hi Aabria!

[yuriyuruandyuraart]

say hi to the sweetest boy himself<3333

#art #my art #utmv #cross sans #cross!sans #cross #what a handsome man. the cutest lil fella<333 #i just wanted to play with colors for a bit honestly x) wasn't planning on posting this #but i'm happy with it you know? it's nothing big or my best piece of art for sure but i love it anyways! #istg the hardest thing was coming up with a caption for this post HHH #nothing much to say here xD but hope you guys like it!! <333

[gasolinelight]

why does it hurt so horribly when you're falling out of love

where I used to feel so much I could hardly stand it I now just feel empty and hollow

I guess we both didn't make enough of an effort and thelate night driving just got to expensive, swimming in the sea under the stars was too impractical, we had to get up early after all

#but it killed me #we just stopped doing all the things that made me fall in love with life #and him #now when i look at him he's just some guy #and the thing is i still love him #he's so nice and comfortable and i just want the best for him #but nothing is exciting anymore #art #adventurecore #falling out of love #love #pls if you can say anything send me a message #i feel so alone with this

[lord-squiggletits]

Like fundamentally my Pharma apologism is basically just flipping the script and making Pharma the protagonist instead so that "crazy mad doctor torturing Ratchet the good Autobot" is instead flipped around to "Heavily traumatized ex(?) Autobot gets revenge on his best friend killing him/leaving him for dead and stealing his body parts."

Honestly I feel like the one misconception that ppl have that makes their interpretations of Pharma or Pharma and Ratchet interactions really bad, is that too many ppl in the fandom treat(ed) Pharma like some random creepy stalker that barely even knew Ratchet, as opposed to Ratchet's literal best friend that only lost contact with him right before Earth events happened (so basically after 4+ million years of friendship they hadn't seen each other for like...2 years tops which is nothing in the average Cybertronian lifespan). Though I can't blame them because sometimes the narrative likes to forget that too in terms of acting like Pharma is solely in the wrong/everything Ratchet did to hurt him was deserved bc Pharma killed people and was stupid/arrogant/shallow.

Like ppl have GOT to understand that Pharma and Ratchet were best friends since before the war started. For reference that would make the length of their friendship comparable to Ratchet and OP's friendship. Which means they would've been REALLY FUCKING CLOSE, not that you really have to read between the lines to see that when Ratchet himself mentions how he and Pharma used to talk late into the night together.

So when Pharma is obsessed with Ratchet, it's not bc he's some delusional stalker who doesn't even know him and is just projecting all of his hates/desires onto Ratchet. It's because they were literally lifelong friends that only broke up/fell out of contact like a year prior. Pharma DOES know Ratchet. He DOES have a meaningful relationship with him. He DOES have the right to be pissed off at Ratchet because a lifelong friendship gives Pharma a claim to Ratchet's regard. Not in a "oh you HAVE to stay friends with me" kind of way, but in a betrayal sense of "oh you did me DIRTY for someone who used to call me his best friend." Imo there's an obligation between lifelong friends where if you hurt them or break up with them, it's a serious deal and you can't treat them like a stranger just bc you hate them

#squiggposting #idk me projecting my philosophy about friendship yet again #pharma apologism #the narrative of m/mtte really wants you to forget that they were best friendols #or at least think that their friendship means nothing for how ratchet should treat pharma #which is fucked up imo bc there are friends that i have/had #where even if we were no longer friends i wouldnt suddenly find it acceptable to like. hurt them #the weight of our former friendship is such that i respect them even if we're no longer friends #so anyways pharma is not 'obsessed' or 'stalking' ratchet #he's a spurned and betrayed best friend seeking revenge on the guy who killed him #(or put him in a situation where he would die) #something about friendship as a sacred bond where some ways of breaking it #arent merely 'parting ways' but a betrayal of treating someone you love as an enemy

[iloveyouitisruiningmylife]

spending my whole life trying and trying and trying and trying to be good enough for people who don't give a fuck about me

#im so tired living seems pointless why am i doing this what is the reason #the firm i work at is going thru a merger so it's releasing all the interns except 2 #i went into her office and said that id like to stay here bc my dad said so bc i got in cause he was friends with the head #and she said ill think about it based on performance ive not decided yet #and this other guy he went in to tell her that cool he'll leave and she told him that she was hoping that he'd stay #he literally does nothing but play games on his phone he doesn't work at all #i have no idea what he has that i don't #but just. im stuck like this forever right never ever good enough for people i like or care about #not for parents they have a diff fav child not for ex gf not for bestie who has a boyfriend much better at loving her than me #not for that one guy who rejected me in interview bc i don't read the newspaper and didn't know the date of the finance act #im so fucking sick of this i never even wanted to this fuckinh course and obviously even my best isn't enough and ofc im not good enough #for anyone in this field and ill just struggle and struggle and struggle all my life just to earn some fucking money so i can live away #from my sociopathic parents #and the worst part is that i can't stop feeling like maybe it IS me yk maybe i am the problem maybe im not trying hard enough #but how else am i supposed to handle this i prioritize my studies and lose all my friends i prioritise my friends and fail in d #exams #and the trauma keeps on coming every fucking day bc sociopathic parents but i jsut push it down and say not rn i will cry at night anx then #never cry #i wish someone would just tell me that idk you're wrong you're not made for this you really do have some mental illness and you're really #trying your best and do something that's easy and that you love doing #oh god this is now a ventpost #mes

[doublekanble]

557 tabs and counting (at least 300 of them are for this one fic) and a prediction of 10k at the lowest with a tons of fucking dialogue and 4k of setting up the plot (still havent reached the middle act, 2 scenes planned and still havent comb thru 3 part that only serves as structure layout) for the first time ever i raises a white flag over the horizon, this HAVE to be post in chapters over courses of like a week at least.

#/kbtalk #im doing my very best to not go insane theres so much dialogue #im an actual semi neet irl i havent have an irl convo that lasted for an hour in YEARS what am i doing with my life #lucky for me i finally get around to making an ao3 account recently so i can just post these there too. the format makes it more neat #i like to keep my work short and tidy in terms of posting so like at least 2 of them were posted as a package deal going against my plans #im scared of posting in parts bc ik ppl r less likely to read them #im doing this for fun but also i want to feel validated over it goddammit (i love you even when you dont comment but also #low self confidence i need to be reassured im doing well. i am nothing but a little guy #tis a part of life i supposed #i absolutely love concept of gods that exist in spite of each other (imagine hoozuki no reitetsu) and i have at least- #10 wikipedia tabs open looking up religion and shit #but also the beta for this will be so fucking brutal im just vying to write the blood kiss atp #oh to be an exorcist. being kissed by the demon possessing the prettiest girl alive with blood in her mouth...

[ufolvr]

How I sleep understanding my favorite villain's personality and backstory and why they work so well while also throwing key aspects of it away for the benefit of my own indulgences btw ^_^

#📡 incoming transmission 📡 #once again talking about frieza. mostly. their backstory and direct mirroring of goku's is the strongest in the series #they never had to life a finger for anything ever and thats the point #but.... sometimes a guy has certain needs and urges #i also mess with buu and cell but thats after they died so i can do whatever. like introducing a character for them to bounce off of #is one thing but changing their backstory is another. do you see it? i dont think i need to do that to tell a meaningful story #for frieza however i do not want them 'going soft' for anyone ever. i want them to have been soft from the very beginning #that's a lot stronger to me. what if they cared? what if they cared so much. what then. #any other changes i make to characters i like esp villains is more... well. where can we go from here buddy? #and less What would happen if your backstory was a moved a little bit to the left. it just genuinely depends on what works best ^^ #self insert #selfshipping #f/o #selfship #self ship #also bc its driving me up the wall: #me whenever i tell you that frieza cannot be enjoyed separately from their femininity and poise so frieza with a square jaw means nothing #and cell was hard for me to grasp but the truth is that the more human she became the scarier she got. #like another false sense of familiarity almost #and buu is all over the place because buu is buu and makes little to no logical sense #this has nothing to do with the post. sometimes i just like to sound smart #and as a proof that i do know frieza plenty well i just love to fuck with them and make them care for someone