#I was like what do u mean why would I need to ask

[moonstruckme]

I recently found ur page and omfg I spent hours yesterday reading all ur work!!!! What a lil fic of Sirius and reader but like pre relationship where she's in the hospital (u can pick reason) and she refuses to see anyone and just asks for Sirius

Thanks for requesting my love!

cw: hospital, mention of stitches

Sirius Black x fem!reader ♡ 906 words

Sirius feels awkward and stiff as he pulls back the curtain, though for all he knows you’re too hopped up on pain meds to even know it’s him. Really, that’s the only reasonable explanation for the directions the nurse had just delivered: “She said she’ll only see Sirius right now.” 

He has no clue why you’d ask for him. He’s probably the least comforting of your roommates, and as soon as he catches sight of you, knees tented in front of your chest and hands clasped around your ankles, his worry for your choice deepens. 

Someone’s tried to clean you up, but they’ve done a shit job of it. There’s still blood crusted on your chin, and your face is blotchy, your cheeks smeared with dark gray like you’d wiped across them with your hands only to spread your makeup off to the sides. James had said you’d cried the whole car ride to A&E, but Sirius still wasn’t prepared to see you like this. His chest feels hollow and achy. 

“Hey,” you say, voice scratchy. If hearts have strings, you’re playing his like a fiddle. 

“Hey, doll.” He goes for a smile as he sits on the edge of your little cot, managing to sound halfway normal. “Come here often?” 

You start to grin, then stop like it hurts. Sirius stops, too. 

“Yeah, you know,” you say, “now and then.” 

“Don’t see why.” He makes a show of looking about him, at the papery blue curtain and beige-ish linoleum floors. “Place is sorta depressing.” 

You roll your eyes, and Sirius’ heart lightens to see you in a better humor. “Yeah, I think I’ve judged my hangout poorly. I’m dying to get out of here.” 

He’ll bet. You’ve been here hours longer than him. James had been the only one home with you when you’d tripped on the stairs and bitten through your lip, and Sirius and Remus had only found out when they’d gotten home and seen the note James left, his already scribbly handwriting worsened by haste and panic. By the time they’d arrived they’d missed most of the action (Sirius was secretly thankful for that) and James had filled them in before the nurse had come out to inform them that you’d gotten three stitches in your lip and summoned Sirius back. 

“I can understand that.” He gives you his best approximation of James’ easygoing grin. “You ready to go home then, gorgeous?” 

The shift is slight, but Sirius sees your bravado fade, a shyness entering your expression. “That’s actually why I wanted to see you,” you say.

“Yeah?” He doesn’t bother to hide his curiosity. “Why’s that?” 

“Because I know you’ll be honest with me.” 

He feels his eyebrows go up. “About what, doll?” 

You shrink a bit, knees drawing closer to your chest. Your voice is small when you ask, “Is it awful? I mean, do I look awful?” 

Ah. Sirius can see why you’d want him for this, but you’re wrong in your assumption. He’d absolutely lie to you if he needed to, just like Remus or James would in his place. But you’ve asked for him, so Sirius tries to do right by you. 

“You could never look awful, dollface. Be sensible.” He squints his eyes teasingly, reaching for your ankle and giving it a reprimanding little shake. “It’s just a couple of stitches, you haven’t been warped unrecognizable.” 

You frown, and it’s even more upsetting than usual. Your eyes look heart-breakingly insecure. “Are you sure?” you ask softly. 

“Yeah, I’m fucking sure.” Sirius scoffs like you’re unbelievable. “You said it yourself, babe, I wouldn’t lie to you.” He definitely would, but there’ll never be an occasion for that. He can’t imagine you genuinely looking bad. “I can clean you up a bit, though, if you’d like.” 

You blink. “Um, yeah. If you think it would help.” 

“Brilliant. Sit tight.” Sirius gets up and starts going through drawers, sifting through medical supplies for something he can use. 

“Fairly sure you’re not supposed to do that.” You sound like you’re trying not to smile. 

“Fairly certain my taxes pay for this place, and they’ve left my best-looking roommate with a dirty face.” He finds a box of mini-wipes, turning back to you. “Don’t tell James I’ve said that.” 

“Oh, I’m definitely tattling on you,” you tease, and Sirius is caught between feeling triumphant and worried that you look very near to grinning. He has no clue how easy it is to tear your stitches. 

“What, you want us to match? That’s cruel, sweetheart.” 

You roll your eyes. “He won’t punch you.” 

Sirius huffs a laugh, holding you still with a hand on your jaw as he wipes gently at your chin. “You haven’t known him as long as I have.” 

Your brows flick up as you meet his eyes, disbelieving. “Our James? You really think our James would hit you for saying he’s not the best looking roommate?” 

“Well, not if you’re in front of me,” he muses. He throws out the first wipe, ripping open another. “He already feels bad for you, so maybe that can work in my favor. If you are going to tell him, lean on me as we walk out, okay, doll? Give me a fighting chance.” 

The corner of your lips twist as you close your eyes and Sirius wipes sideways across your cheek. “Yeah, fair enough. I’ll do my best for you.”

#sirius black #sirius black x reader #sirius black x fem!reader #sirius black x y/n #sirius black x you #sirius black x self insert #sirius black fanfiction #sirius black fanfic #sirius black fic #sirius black fluff #sirius black hurt/comfort #sirius black imagine #sirius black drabble #sirius black scenario #sirius black blurb #sirius black oneshot #sirius black one shot #marauders #marauders fanfiction #marauders fandom #the marauders #marauders era #hp marauders #marauders x reader

[furuyalover]

4:52 pm

— ft. kuroo tetsurou

includes: a cute lil impromptu study date

it’s april and we all know what that means, finals season. right now it’s just you, your laptop, numerous papers and notebooks, and an iced matcha latte enveloping you in the cozy cafe atmosphere. you’re trying study for your calculus test tomorrow and you’re pretty focused, for the most part.

about ten minutes ago you glance up from your studies where you notice a familiar face across the cafe, kuroo tetsurou. while you’re decently close with your classmate and you’ve made conversation with him numerous times, you figured both of you are too busy with your work for you to approach him right now. however you can’t seem to get the striking captain out of your head. you’ve always had an admiration for him but some would say it’s more like a crush… so after a solid 15 minutes of pretending to do work and pondering what to do, you finally decide to maybe shoot him a text!

y/n: hey am i tripping or is there an obnoxious volleyball player studying across from me?

kuroo: obnoxious is a strong word 😒 u also studying for the calc test? 😭

y/n: kind of …. not doin too hot rn

kuroo: oh well you’re in luck then

and just like that you glance up from your screen and notice him begin to gather his things and make his way towards you. the middle blocker plops himself down on a seat next to you and begins unpacking his bag. “don’t worry princess im here to save you from your calc demons.” your flutters a little at the sudden nickname, but you keep your composure with a quick retort “ok woah im not doing THAT bad.” “then why is your study guide blank?” damn, he got you there. “whatever you gonna help me or what?” since he’s a man of his word he opens his notebook helping you review what you’ve learned these past classes, and working you through each problem better than khan academy ever could. he’s concise but sweet, making sure to comfort you every time you’re overwhelmed or not sure how to solve a problem. you’ve never seen this side of him, you’re used to dealing with his cockiness and sarcasm and this caring demeanor is something new to you.

but just like that an hour and a half has gone by and you’ve both successfully gotten through all your homework! where did all the time go? you wondered to yourself. embarrassingly, you’re kind of upset that you’re study sesh has come to an end. you’ve always wanted to go out with kuroo outside of class, and this is the closest you’re ever gonna get to that. “oh well all good things must come to an end” kuroo says, almost defeated you thank him for all his help while you start packing your things.

“actually wait before you go,” you stop what you’re doing to look up at him, wondering what he possibly need. surely he’s just gonna ask about something from class right? wrong. hes flustered. almost red even. scratching the back of his neck he finally looks at you and says “i really enjoyed hanging out with you, and i just wondered if you wanted to do this again sometime?” you’ve never seen him so nervous before, so you let out a small smile with a slightly confused look on your face. “what, like study?” your smile ends up giving him reassurance and just like that his confident demeanor is back. he grabs your hand and says “well that’d be a pretty boring date don’t ya think?” grinning before placing a chaste kiss on your hand.

you look down to try and hide the rosy blush that now plastered your face (too late he already saw it). flustered by his sudden advance you look up and match his confidence arrogance with your own. “alright then, but if i don’t get an A on this test im rejecting you”

“oh like that’s ever gonna happen” you roll your eyes, but he has a point.

reblogs appreciated and admired ૮₍ ˃ ⤙ ˂ ₎ა

AN: ahhh this was so fun to write <3 love love loveee writing some friends/classmates to lovers drabbles !! hope u guys enjoyed this lil piece i whipped up :)

#game time! #kuroo tetsurou #kuroo testurou drabbles #kuroo headcanons #kuroo tetsurou headcanons #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu fluff #hq headcanons #hq x reader #hq fluff #kuroo x reader #kuroo x you #kuroo tetsurou hcs #kuroo fluff #kuroo tetsuro fluff #kuroo imagine

[nori-the-cat]

can u do sungchan as a bf

Why is this so high in demand? Ladies and gents, are we collectively thirsty for him??? (Me too.) and yes, I'm doing this reading for us curious and thirsty ladies and gents.

RIIZE Jung Sungchan as Your Boyfriend

Was he okay with me doing this reading? Yes. But he was at first a little hesitant and ironically shy and pretty sweet.

Remember, this is just my interpretation based on the tarot spread. All of this are alleged and for entertainment purposes only. Take it with a grain of salt.

So, what is Sungchan like a boyfriend?

Cards: knight of cups, five of cups, the chariot, page of cups, the hierophant, seven of cups, ten of wands, the empress, three of wands, ace of wands, six of swords, the devil, and eight of pentacles.

I said he's sweet, right? He is actually a sweet guy. There are cup(s) cards in this reading. I often associate the cup(s) card with emotions and Sungchan is an emotional guy.

Is your type a man who is in tune with his emotions? Someone dominant and masculine? The kind of guy who takes the lead and initiates things? A reliable man? Well, Sungchan is a total keeper.

He seems like the kind of guy who really gets you, you know? Like, for example, he can tell when you're feeling down and will always be there to cheer you up or just listen if you need to vent.

He's aware of you and your surroundings. You won't have to worry about feeling neglected. He's most likely going to notice if you change your hair or make-up. The kind of boyfriend who is super supportive and sweet.

Imagine this scenario: You're having a tough day at work or university and feeling discouraged. You meet Sungchan for coffee and vent about your frustrations. He listens patiently, validates your feelings, and offers words of encouragement.

When things get rough, Sungchan's the kind of guy who totally gets it. He's there for you, no matter what. He would make you feel supported and safe in his arms (and biceps).

Not only that Sungchan seems like a super chill and supportive guy. He's a great listener, so you can vent about anything that's bugging you, and trust me, everyone needs that sometimes. Plus, he totally gets vibes, you know? Like, after a rough day, he'd be the first person to offer a giant hug and words of encouragement that make you feel ten times better. Sounds like a dream boyfriend, right? That's what Sungchan want to make you feel. He wants you to think he's the partner of your dream.

However, it's not easy to be with Sungchan. I also think he knows it's not easy for him either.

Sungchan wouldn't go into a relationship just because he's interested or finds the person attractive. In terms of love, he's not much of a risk-taker. He values tradition and commitment, and seeking other's opinions is important to him.

So, he might be the type to consider his parents' or friend's opinion before dating someone. I'm assuming he wants to be validated for the decision he makes. But it could also mean the person he dates is not just someone he loves and cares for. For Sungchan, his partner is a part of his life and someone he integrates into his daily routine. He wants them to be accepted in his surroundings or community.

I would say, being in a relationship is a pretty big deal for him. Regardless of the validation or not, he will most likely ask his closest ones about their opinion on his partner (you).

When Sungchan loves, he loves hard. Hence, valuing the opinion of others and not just his own is something he would do. Maybe he was raised that way? Is South Korean society influencing him? I don't know. But, for him, this leads to overthinking and indecisiveness as well as the tendency to people please.

In a relationship, this aspect of him would cause some friction. There could be miscommunications and arguments. Imagine you and Sungchan are planning a weekend getaway. You've both researched different destinations and activities, each with its own appeal. Sungchan might get overwhelmed by the options and have difficulty picking just one. He might spend a lot of time weighing the pros and cons of each location, even after you've discussed them together.

He is also overly responsible and takes on too much. I'm sure the fans know how many times his members have said he is the reliable one. So in a relationship, it is like he might be taking the burden when the relationship goes sour and causing him to be overwhelmed.

Personally, in a relationship, I find Sungchan to be a great guy, but sometimes he could go into overdrive. He might try to fix everything, which can be a bit much, you know? Also, he is a little bit of a perfectionist. He might want the relationship to feel and look perfect. But, no relationship is perfect? Well, tell that to Sungchan.

In another light, his perfection could translate to him feeling unsatisfied or often worried about the future. So, think about planning, like him planning a future together with you.

As a partner or significant other, he isn't just in it for a good time. He's looking for the real deal, someone to build a future with. We're talking relationship goals, not just Netflix and chill.

He's the 'I'm in a relationship to get married'. He is in it for the long run.

Despite preferring a long-term and serious relationship. Sungchan gets bored pretty easily. He needs the relationship to have some dynamic. He likes routines, but he much prefers to have some unexpected plan once in a while. Whether it's a morning road trip or going for mountain climbing, Sungchan needs excitement in his life. This is because he enjoys trying new things with his partner (you), keeping the spark alive and creating lasting memories. Basically, he wants to keep the relationship exciting.

Now, say, he's in a long-term relationship with you. Sungchan is all about being a good boyfriend. He's got your back no matter what, and your happiness is his number one priority. He is really about making the relationship feel good and look good, so making you happy is a part of his plan. Like, he wouldn't dream of ditching plans for guys' night if you needed a Netflix marathon and takeout.

Another side of him that I notice in this reading and around Shotaro is how clingy and somewhat possessive he is to the people he is close with. This side of him might be visible in a romantic relationship. Sungchan might get a liiittle jealous sometimes, you know? Like, maybe blowing up your phone when you're out with the girls or needing some reassurance every now and then. Nothing major, but just something to be aware of.

Sungchan's love language:

Sungchan's love language is most likely Acts of Service.

Being there for his partner: He's dependable and reliable, taking the initiative to cheer someone up or lend an ear.

Prioritizing his partner's happiness: This could involve things like cancelling plans to spend time together or planning exciting activities to keep the spark alive.

Taking responsibility: He takes on a lot and tries to "fix" things, demonstrating his commitment to the relationship's well-being.

Additional information:

Sungchan's energy is pretty overwhelming for me. I'm not going to lie that I feel a little intimidated. It's like he's trying to scare me away? I'm not scared, but intimidated? Defo. I had to take a break from doing this reading by distracting myself and doing other things.

I also think his intimidating face or cold-looking expression is a mask. He might be a super sensitive guy and uses the least unattractive expression to hide this side of him. He's also SUPER masculine. SUPER DOMINEERING too. His dominant energy was very much felt during the reading.

As the reading progresses, he gets more comfortable and that's when I realised it was okay to do this reading.

Also, him as a boyfriend reminds me of Taylor Swift's song Fearless and in particular the line "But you're just so cool. Run your hands through your hair." I'm pretty sure I've seen it somewhere. A picture or fan video of him running his hand through his hair and he looked hot. That's how I thought of Fearless as the song that matches his vibe as a boyfriend. The song Baby I'm Yours by Artic Monkeys also reminds me of him.

#kpop #riize #kpop tarot #riize tarot #riize sungchan #sungchan riize #nori tarot #riize x reader #riize scenarios #riize imagines #riize fluff #jung sungchan #sungchan x reader #sungchan imagines #sungchan fluff #kpop reading #tarot reading #tarot

[weebsinstash]

Was thinking of something you said about Luci. Like him crying when he sees you coming you back to the hotel all marked up. Even better idea, him regularly spying on you using the orbs/balls from episode 6. Probably started as a way to learn more about you and make sure you're safe but quickly became something else....

Like you say him seeing you after? How about him watching you get fucked crying his eyes out and touching himself?

Like he's so upset it's not him, but he can't NOT watch and listen! He needs to see what you like so he can be perfect for you, and make sure you're safe. So what if he touches himself? How can he not when it's you he's watching and hearing? Even if it's with some sinner scum.

I misread Luci as Lucci and I was like "HOW DO Y O U KNOW I'VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT ROB LUCCI, I HAVEN'T EVEN POSTED ABOUT MY CP0 READER X LUCCI ESPIONAGE IDEA YET--"

I was thinking about Lucifer, you know, how we tend to think of him as Charlie's dad and just "the Devil" but I think we can kind of forget, he's also the Cardinal Sin of Pride, and I keep brainstorming on how he's probably INSANELY JEALOUS AND POSSESSIVE AND WOULD BE TRYING TO IMPRESS YOU ALL THE TIME

Can you even imagine like. He's peeping on you getting railed by someone twice your size and that person can absolutely scoop you up and throw you around with how big they are and here's Lucifer uncomfortably reminded of how short he is. bonus points if before this you and him had an argument and you shit all over his height just to piss him off and now he's seeing you fuck some huge dude. Give him that emotional damage with the backstab buff

The thing with Lucifer is that, he's short, yeah, but like. He's also ungodly strong. I'm too lazy to link the post but people have pointed out that he literally was not even remotely phased when Adam was throwing him against a building and trying to hurt him, like actual frames of Lucifer just kinda sitting there o.o, totally unbothered. And this could go one of two ways! You could get protected and rescued by him and, he scoops you up into his arms and that makes YOU feel small (in a sexy way)

OR

you kinda like, not infantilize him per se, but you figure, since he's "this little goober" that he would never like, ACTUALLY do anything scary, but. Honey he's a grown man who wants you as a serious partner and he's extremely prideful and attached to you and you're, constantly picking other people over him 💀💀💀 you're irritating him on purpose, you're giving him sass, you're FUCKING OTHER DUDES and I can see him totally snapping, "you think I'm not serious about you?! I'll show you!!" and just, yoinks you up, snatches you away, you're magically appearing either AT THE ALTAR WITH HIM LIKE, WEDDING WITH AN ENTIRE AUDIENCE, or straight into his bed where he proceeds to show you exactly why he deserves to be your king

(Tbh I've grown a sudden uh, taste for "yandere character suddenly reveals they're gonna marry you" and I mean with a whole ass engagement ring and WEDDING especially for Lucifer and Alastor recently 😩 WAIT LUCILILI POLY WEDDING-)

Still obsessed with "i bet she doesn't even see me as a man" Lucifer vs "he definitely doesn't even see me as a woman haha I'm gross :)" Reader where little Luci Goosey finds out you're just, straight up either hating yourself or have been rejected too many times to even find yourself desirable, and the second he realizes it's not even him that's 'the problem', he's taking matters into his own hands. Like something slips out of your mouth, "why would anyone want me, I'm, I'm dorky and stupid and gross and ugly" and Lucifer is just like, "OH!!! Aw honey you just have depression :) oh golly we have so much in common--"

I also just. Really like the idea that he's basically got full control over Hell and can get in your head and know what you're thinking and feeling if he REALLY wants to. Got another ask in my drafts I'm about to get to that delves more into the idea of him and Lilith HELLA abusing their dream controlling/pocket dimension powers in a definitely not "you didn't know you had a secret second life in your dreams that was 100% real" kinda way...

#yandere hazbin hotel #yandere x reader #hh #yandere hellaverse #sinprompts

[brookheimer]

i feel very mixed on shiv's ending, particularly her choice to return to tom -- i think it makes sense from a thematic/character arc perspective and is a powerful yet devastating indictment of both shiv and the world that created her as well as showing that the cycle of abuse will always continue to cycle, that shiv will become her mother etc, but i also think it does not make sense from a character/internal logic perspective. it's a choice that makes sense from the writers, but not from shiv, not yet. it could've been a brilliant ending to her character, but is tainted for me by the less-than-ideal execution of it, which felt very rushed, making shiv's final submission to tom feel forced by the show rather than forced by the situation or honest to her character. the ending is not inherently misogynistic from the writers' side as i've seen some criticisms claim (it is a dark but real portrayal of misogyny within capitalist society and how it's internalized within the white women who end up at the hips of the CEOs who run it), but i do understand how it could feel that way. the show fails at building up to (and thus convincing us) that the version of shiv we currently know would so immediately subject herself to her mother's fate, so instead of it feeling like shiv's hand was forced by patriarchy to place herself into her worst nightmare, it instead feels like the show itself was the thing that forced shiv to take that route, which does leave a sour taste in the mouth. it doesn't feel like the result of a choice shiv would make or the impact of patriarchal society bearing down, it just feels rushed and thus wrong. shiv would've benefitted immensely from a few more episodes or even just a few scenes dedicated to teasing out her newfound willingness to subject herself to immense disrespect in order to remain close to power, but given that her entire character has always been defined by her inability to do just that unless forced to (which i don't think she was in this situation as she could've easily not waited in the car for tom, not put her hand in his, but she did), her return to tom feels hard to comprehend, and her near immediate submission to him hard to stomach.

(read more under the cut because jesus christ did this get long)

in my mind, at least, i've always understood shiv as being respect-driven rather than power-driven -- she wants power, yes, but more than anything she wants to be taken seriously and respected and seen as a legitimate player, and time and time again we've seen her blow up situations that would've been very advantageous long-term because she felt disrespected and needed to speak up and force people to take her seriously (which, ironically, typically results in the opposite). shiv's overarching goal is power, but her immediate necessity is always respect. her dignity is her number one priority at any given moment, even when it shouldn't be, even when it stops her from attaining the success and power she wants. i can kind of understand shiv going against kendall because of this -- she's always had a very, very narrow lens whenever she feels like she's being disrespected, and even though it is infinitely more humiliating for your (somewhat ex) husband to betray you and boot you out of the CEO position behind your back at the behest of your supposed closest ally (and for you to still vote for them after that!!!) than it is for you to magnanimously allow your brother to be CEO (which would publicly be seen as a choice, as telly etc said - sibs need to stand united behind one chosen CEO - rather than shiv being out of the loop and fucked to infinity), the narrowness of her vision upon seeing kendall about to win makes it impossible for her to think about that legitimately. it's not just jealousy, it's indignity: shiv feels she earned CEO through her machinations with mattson and feels genuinely sick seeing the loganified kendall grinning at the head of the table, hearing his "that's fucking right" and witnessing his cocky entitlement to the job that belonged to her. so, she does what she always does when she feels disrespected, when she feels her dignity is at stake, and impulsively blows everything to fuck, including her own best interests. that makes sense for shiv, at least somewhat -- i still think that as much as she wouldn't want ken as CEO she'd feel like at least w that outcome she'd be seen as a player and a deciding factor, whereas with mattson/tom she'd be viewed as a pathetic fucked-over nothing woman pawn etc (a situation of unparalleled indignity imo), but i can rationalize her choice to go against ken anyways as being part of the narrowed field of vision she always gets upon feeling disrespected by men in her life that makes it impossible for her to think strategically (and i guess even though the disrespect was greater and more humiliating from tom/mattson than ken, ken was the most recent most present and most lifelong source so that's all she could focus on; seeing him like logan was too much to bear). it's hard to imagine shiv publicly throwing her vote behind two men who publicly fucked her as humiliatingly as mattson and tom just did, even if the other option is kendall, but i think that's part of it -- it's fundamentally illogical, even from her disrespect-lens, because there's just something about kendall specifically being in charge that she's never been able to stomach. it's visceral and impulsive. it's not meant to make "sense." it's just what she feels she has to do to preserve her own dignity, even though it works directly against those same interests realistically. it wasn't executed very well, making it hard to entirely buy it given just how publicly humiliating the alternative is, but it can still be chalked up to her historically one-track-mind when it comes to indignity by the hands of kendall in particular. it's a last-ditch attempt for shiv to at least feel like she's maintaining her dignity, her self-respect, as counterintuitive as it actually is. it makes sense. i can stomach it.

again, shiv's fatal flaw (in logan's eyes and aside from her original sin of being a woman) has always, always been her inability to shut up and make the smart move in situations where she feels she's being disrespected or not taken seriously. if shiv stayed quiet during that dinner with the pierces, maybe she would've been logan's CEO, but no, she couldn't stop herself, she needed to feel she was being taken seriously, she burst out 'cmon, dad, just tell them it's going to be me.' she is unable to play it smart, to keep quiet, to win when winning means perceived disrespect. she's allergic to it. even on a personal level, she shoots herself in the foot constantly because of this: she is unable to let herself have the things she wants because she can't put herself in positions that open her up to disrespect and perceived inferiority. she can't be vulnerable because she needs to be respected. tom asks her if he could 'try to make love to her' in episode one of this season, and even though she clearly wants to, she says 'no, i don't think so, tom.' tom tells her he 'wants her, wants this' back in episode six, and even though she clearly wants that too, she draws back and says 'well then you shouldn't have betrayed me.' shiv is fundamentally incapable of allowing herself to remain in possibly advantageous situations when she feels at risk of being seen as lesser, of being disrespected, of being perceived as weak. that is her response to patriarchy. when patriarchal forces bear down, shiv is unable to grin and bare it -- she has a short fuse, a sharp tongue, and an inability to entertain even a second of being treated like The Woman, of being looked down upon, especially when it's for her gender. it's the one thing she cannot do, cannot let herself do, and it's why she fails to "win" over and over and over again. she shoots herself in the foot the second her patriarchy disrespect sensors tingle. she makes the wrong choice, the dumb choice, the one that makes her feel like she stood up for herself in the moment but ends up leaving her powerless and helpless in the end. that's the only explanation for why she chose to vote against kendall (the clearly better option for her long-term as she'd 1) be respected as part of the decision, as someone who helped choose the CEO rather than a Woman who got fucked over and had the door slammed in her face by her husband and close ally simply because she possessed a womb, and 2) probably be head of ATN or some other area of waystar, she'd have actual power within the company and be respected as a legitimate source of power rather than the CEO-to-be made CEO's humiliated wife -- if she was capable of making the smart, selfish choice in terms of power instead of having a hair-trigger reaction to gendered disrespect and cocky male superiority, she would have voted kendall. but she is not capable of doing that. she never has been. so she voted tom and mattson.

so what i still cannot for the life of me understand is what would compel this shiv, the one who cannot stomach indignity even when power's on the line, to immediately return to tom's side the second he beckons her, which is like five minutes after he becomes CEO (the job she was promised) by mattson (who gave it to tom instead of shiv because 'why get the baby lady if i can get the man who put the baby inside her?'). it makes perfect, cruel, devastating sense from a show perspective, and that's what most people are talking about, understandably. it's a devastating yet unavoidable, inevitable outcome. she's left with no other choice once she makes the decision against kendall, and patriarchy compels her to play the good wife to stay close to power. except, like... she does still have a choice. she does not have to go back to tom's car. she does not have to sit patiently waiting for him. she does not have to quietly congratulate him on his victory. she does not have to place her hand in his. these are all choices she made very voluntary. they're choices between maintaining her dignity and self-respect at the cost of future power versus maintaining the potential for future power at the cost of her dignity and self-respect -- the classic siobhan roy conundrum. she's been faced with it time and time again (even just five minutes prior with kendall) and she has never, not once, chosen the latter of her own volition. she hasn't been able to. that's her fatal flaw. maybe i could stomach her going back to tom if she didn't congratulate him, didn't place her hand in his when he expectantly held his out -- then some dignity would be preserved, maybe. but her complete and total submission for the sake of future power does not make sense with her lifelong inability to do just that. it makes sense that this would be her eventual endpoint, but we have seen nothing that implies shiv would so willingly subject herself to this feminine submission of wife and mother before person or source of power, to the complete and utter humiliation of being the quiet wife at the side of the man who knifed her in the back (and notably handed said knife by the man she thought her closest ally) in order to steal the job she fought for her entire life and, in her opinion, had earned. maybe she would come back to him eventually, for love or (more likely) for power, but it is incredibly hard to believe that shiv 'impulsive when faced with indignity' roy would be capable of immediately and publicly playing the role of the good wife after such intense and public humiliation at the hands of her husband.

really, the way i feel about the shiv ending is similar to how i feel about the daenerys ending -- unlike most people, i really wasn't that against the daenerys outcome. i thought it made a lot of sense and was interesting, devastating, and fascinating. i thought there had been a few signs all along and that that ending for her would make sense and be far more interesting than a Hooray ! Girlboss ! ending. however, it was poorly executed -- it was rushed. it did not make sense from where daenerys was at that point in the text. it could've worked, it could've worked brilliantly, but it needed more time to build and fester in order for her ultimate turn to feel earned rather than forced for the sake of the point the writers wanted to make. that's kind of how i feel about shiv. i get the ending and i don't think it's inherently bad or misogynistic or anything, but it feels like the writers saw the possibility for a shiv 'mommed' ending and immediately took it, with little regard to what actually made sense for shiv herself to do in that moment. outcome > character. that's frustrating for me particularly for succession because my like number one reason for adoring succession as much as i do is their consistent refusal to operate the way most media does (using the characters as instruments to achieve the plot/outcome the writers want), instead prioritizing following the characters themselves in a way that feels honest and real. it's character-driven, not plot or ending driven. i think that this fell by the wayside a few times in the latter half of this season simply because there was so much that needed to happen in such a short space of time (especially during the finale), but in my opinion, at least, the most egregious case is shiv. given more time, more development, more build-up, the last shot of her hand in tom's would've struck the chord the writers wanted it to -- and for some people, it did anyways! but for me, it rang out and fell nauseatingly flat. it felt hollow and wrong and unearned. shiv could end up becoming her mother, that feels entirely possible, but not in this particular sense, not yet. in what world would siobhan roy willingly choose to be seen as nothing more than a woman hanging off her husband's arm, especially when said husband had publicly humiliated her and ruined her entire life just five minutes prior? when, just five (metaphorical) minutes prior, she was the one poised to be CEO and everyone knew it? when now everyone will see her on tom's arm and whisper and gawk? she has become her worst fear, yes, but unlike kendall, it does not feel earned. it does not feel like she has actually become her worst fear. it feels like the show forced her to. not patriarchy or the situation or her own desire for power, but the show itself. that's what feels so shitty.

i wouldn't necessarily call the writing misogynistic as a result of this, as it's less a flaw of misogyny and more a flaw of bad, rushed writing that could happen to any character. it's the same as with daenerys -- although (somewhat unlike succession) there were many, many aspects of GoT's writing that were deeply misogynistic, especially in the last season (just look at fucking brienne), the core issue with the daenerys plotline is not one of misogyny but of time. they did not give daenerys the time needed to become the version of herself seen burning down the city. that could've easily been a focus of previous episodes, but it wasn't. they simply did not develop her enough for that turn to make sense yet. it could make sense, hypothetically, at some point down the line, but at that point it felt sudden, off-putting, and wrong. shiv could easily become her mother. that's been made evident especially regarding her relationship to pregnancy/children, love, and vulnerability (or the lack thereof). but for this ending to make sense, we would have needed to see signs of shiv imitating her mother's willingness to be relegated to the sidelines, to bring out the food while the men eat and make deals, in order to remain tangential to power. that is a concession shiv roy had never been willing to make prior to the last five minutes of the entire show. other signs of shiv imitating caroline or falling prey to patriarchal norms throughout the show are not enough to undo shiv's fundamental refusal to weather gender-related indignity even when doing so would benefit her. in my opinion, that's why the final five minutes of shiv's plotline were so unsatisfying.

shiv could become her mother, and her ending could be a devastating portrayal of the inability for even rich white women to escape their original sin of being a woman in a man's world, as well as a dark, ironic criticism of both women like shiv and the patriarchal world that breeds them into existence. but because the show did not develop shiv in this particular direction and because her entire character thus far has been defined by her self-destructive insistence on being respected at all costs, shiv's ending did not land the way it could've, or should've.

#WOOF okay this was long. not even gonna read it over bc if i do i'll never stop editing to it or adding to it and god knows no one needs tht #so if it's shit well. forgive me #but yeah this is just my take. i felt really unhappy w shiv's ending but didn't quite know why because the ending itself i can imagine bein #fine with but really i just feel very frustrated by the show writing over any agency she would normally have had in order to make their #point by the time the episode ended #honestly the more i think about it the more i feel this season should've had more episodes -- i think another season after this one would b #GREAT for me personally obviously but unnecessary for the show itself and possibly too much of a good thing #but at the same time the latter half of this season could really have benefitted from a little wiggle room and space to develop #so it wasn't just Sudden Mattson Likes Tom or Wait Did Mencken Disappear or Remember Roman's Sexuality or SHIV FUCKING SHIIIIV lolllll #ok. this is too long. post #succession #succession spoilers #long post #and i mean LONG #should i do a read more? i never know what the like courtesy is lmao #well . yall asked for it so here u go #shiv roy #succession meta #i guess #edit i did a read more this is disgusting LOLOL #100 #casey shut the fuck up about shiv roy

[shopcat]

i was goinggg to say something way longer but if all it takes is a pretty surface level criticism of you as a fandom and not even a personal attack or something for you to send someone (a palestinian no less) an ask like this then maybe they have a point

i do still think you can care about multiple things at once obv but when the sustained efforts of an online campaign to get people to listen bear a resemblance superficially, frustration and anger is a normal response to that ... 😭 and getting feelings hurt about it isn't going to make those people just be like "Oh never mind you guys are cool" or something esp if you keep proving you CAN'T be cool about it ... you can obviously care about palestine (and any other global issue) and talk about it and take actionable steps to further this and be active about it AND want to get a show renewed or whatever but that's not really the point. (some) people are getting to a unhealthy level of obsession about this renewal and people critiquing that in the wake of the very well-known criticism already surrounding the show is Not the end of the world for you, and that is what this is. and it is not a complex scenario it's pretty 1 + 1. like I'VE been getting more frustrated about the severity of seeing the word renewal everywhere since the beginning and i think people (largely PALESTINIANS THEMSELVES...) saying this have a point.

#🐾 #to clarify that ask was sent to someone else not me #this is all kind of driving me crazy just seeing the way everyone [in the fandom] are talking about it #the way it's all wrapped up together makes it kind of hard to see clearly but it's like #idrc if you want a renewal it's not that big a deal to me it's not any A Deal to me actually. like do what u want about it too it's not #hurting anyone. commenting on hbo max's socials and petitions and emails and stuff is like... fine #it's sustained but it's localised and focused #the other clear factor here obviously is that while a lot of people don't think TW is a zionist obviously some people do #and that's going to reflect on you (and us) whether you like it or not #and like yeah sure the guz khan stuff is most likely misinfo but the anger about it is understandable and NECESSARY #and saying all that like YEAH taika might not be a zionist but con o'n*ill sure fucking is #and i dunno. this is just all what i mean #people are going to talk to you in a way that you will interpret as an attack and sure sometimes it will be. but it's because these are #serious issues. i know ppl in the fandom feel like they have this talk every other day but why would anyone on the outside see that ? #and if they're not seeing that you have to accept that you need to be able to respond in a non-condescending and actually informative way #and don't just get personally hurt over what you perceive as an attack on you or your values or morals #as long as you do stand for a free palestine and condemn zionism and don't say stupid shit there shouldn't BE a problem i don't know #* i also understand for the few ofmd muts i do have that everyone's been getting asks and stuff over the past few days and i don't mean #any of that. though the general mindset of those people applies #sort of. some people are definitely just being reactionary and i have seen a lot of weird shit obv. also this isn't at any of you

[wongcarwhy]

do u guys kno. just how much i screwed myself over

#BECAUSE I DONT KNOW HOW TO BE NORMAL????? #listen. listen. i could have just. asked to take two weeks off when i first got the job. but i was scared they wouldn't give me the job #if i told them right off the bat #and so i waited a decent amount of time to tell them. and then i was going to tell them. but i got scared thinking that they might fire me #or it would reflect badly on me and i haven't had the job for even 3 months yet and i have a performance review at the end of the 3 months #and the thing i am scared of most in the world is when people who are in positions of authority over me express disapproval #so i was just like. ok i guess i'm not going on this trip that's been planned for over a year and for my grandmas 80th #i will just be so sad and miserable about it and make it everyone else's problem #and then. and then. finally. 2 weeks left until everyone leaves for the trip and i finally bring it up to my coworkers being like #oh yea my whole entire family is going on a big trip without me and i'm rlly sad that i can't go #and they looked at me like. why cant u go? and i was like. what do u mean? cuz i'm new i don't have rights #and they were like. what is wrong with u #and i looked at them and said literally everything #listennnn there is a corporate heirarchy and i am at the bottom of the ladder #i know my place and i'm so used to groveling and begging oh my god i need to get a grip pls #am i normal #please tell me cuz i can't tell is. it normal to be this scared and frightened all the time #like. am i the only one who thinks this way.

[quicktimeeventfull]

like it has happened to me SO many times that my manager will come up to me and be like ‘can you do this’ and i will be like ‘yes’ bc i can. and the question has been answered. no request has been made of me. so i do not take any further action. but in fact what she meant was ‘please do this.’ & it seems like the obvious solution to this problem would be to treat ‘can you do this’ as a request 100% of the time but it is NOT a request 100% of the time. sometimes she is literally just asking bc she needs to know, for future projects, if our system is capable of xyz. how does one parse this. i’m so confused.

#or she’ll be like ‘why is this happening’ and i’ll answer the question but SOMEHOW i was meant to know that i wasn’t supposed to answer it #like why are you asking if you don’t need to know #but they do need things. like this isn’t just pointless babble u know. they are looking for things they require. #i don’t like the line of thinking that’s like ‘allistic people just need to communicate better’ bc that’s literally not what’s happening #u know #like they’re not trying to Trick You even if it feels this way #but idk how they’re doing it. its so confusing. #my manager is actually very nice btw whenever this happens she just asks it again as a request #and now that we’ve worked together for a while she usually says outright if she needs something done or if she’s just telling me stuff #and she gets defensive on my behalf if people make jokes that i could reasonably misunderstand as an actual fact or request #so she’s not trying to be mean it’s just like. literally confusing. idk. i don’t get it. #gkjlgdfk yesterday she came by my desk and was like ‘oh we don’t really need to be in tomorrow. it would be good to work from home tomorrow #it seems like you can do all your work from home’ #and i was just staring at her bc i KNEW something else was being communicated but i just could not for the life of me figure out what it wa #and then finally she was like ‘don’t come in. don’t come to work tomorrow.’ #and i was like ‘:D’ #anyway. i think that’s what people should do. just meet people halfway u know. if someone clearly isn’t understanding just clarify

[munamania]

something that makes me feel guilty is the fact that seeing that persons face rn literally makes me angry. they walked into class and i nearly winced. and in all fairness they were quite kind to me. outside of the several kind of odd red flags. girl whatever. to be quite frank i am a horny bastard and vocal proud etc but few people interest me enough to actually want to hang out with and get to know And i have deep seated intimacy issues so it's like. we really dont have a shot unless the circumstances r exactly right on a full moon perfect thursday of a month etc like. well and tbh i probably would have fucked around with this person but i dont... care... about some big relationship w them.. and i know i could be a relationship girl like eventually i have it in me to have a muse that's what im built for i think idc but not rn... rn i need to hang out with my friends and do my film stuff and have people that maybe wanna make out sometimes is that so much to ask for. for a lesbian at a bar to want to make out perhaps. ** for there to be lesbians at the bars to potentially make out with.

#and i am quite lonely yes thank u for asking. yeah someday id love to get to know someone again in the context of falling in love #what about it. so what now. i dont think im meant for our understanding of romantic love but boy do i crave it #why am i having this moment rn. well ok consider im on my period all i could think about this morning was [redacted] and both parties #of my dyke drama were back in class today. and the one gay person that i think has a crush on me but we dont see each other super often #so im just. guessing based on the way awkward lesbians communicate. idk #and i feel really just mean but i quite literally dont have it in me to pretend to be nice to this person anymore #i wasnt like. some villain for realizing we were acting really coupley and being like oh shit because i didnt want to hurt them #. and trying to communicate and put some distance between us when i thought they were probably in too deep. it's unfortch it took me a sec #but jesus christ yk i cant walk around and feel awkward about it forever. and im frustrated by the fact that we're just acting so odd #but again frankly i think it's largely bc they have an unhealthy relationship with dating. THROWING HORIZONTAL PUNCHES HERE. #OK. STONES FROM A GLASS HOUSE. IM AWARE. REAL RECOGNIZES REAL. #and YET. despite my past insanity. ive been kind. i can understand disappointment and a little awkwardness #but jesus would you rather i pretend to be in love with you for months and then really break your heart. #this is where i get mean and make a joke like well hey if we couldve had weird really mediocre sad angry dyke sex abt it #that would have been cool with me. but alas. we're here instead and it's fucking with my friendships too #and like we were kind of ok friends too. what now. its just u me and this brick wall u built between us bitch #now was EYE not answering texts for a minute. we dont need to get into it. #because the thing IS if i dont play things exactly right. and im not good at that without prior planning. i will accidentally say or do #something that i know. again. from being insane myself. would be just enough for them to hold onto hope #and im not trying to do that to them you know. i was trying to help with the detachment. shitty as it may be. i dont fucking know dude #this post is going to make me look kind of. well. whatever u guys have seen me at my worst. mostly. and post #ok one last thing sorry if this makes me sound like i have a giant ego. like wow heres this person who really liked me and im just shitting #all over them. not what im meaning to do but whatever

[eeunwoo]

this is super on brand for me but today I’m experiencing debilitating frustration @ being misunderstood on the internet like some kind of loser 😩

#I’m v open and literally never lie unless it’s needed #so u can see why I struggle with people trying to claim the opposite when they don’t know me. or make assumptions and pass them off as fact #or come to conclusions without asking anyone who would actually know #and if you see some of my posts you’d argue the same about me but the fact is if I post something that could change peoples views about #somebody else .. I check with multiple people who know #that’s why the v@l and her bestie situation was particularly upsetting bc there’s an entire group of people who knows I’m right but. didn’t #say anything in support and just let a bunch of ppl send me anon hate and invent things that aren’t true #and use that situation to fit fake narratives they already thought of before #I’m not dredging it up again I’m just using it as an example #or the anon on my last blog listing a bunch of things about me that they got completely wrong and didn’t bother asking about #and sometimes I always think about clarifying those things in a huge post. but then I remember those people will just find something new to #cling on to. so there’s no point. #but it doesn’t mean it’s not upsetting. you know ? #and it’s not about a single person or anything it’s just. in general. #I’ve been criticised for admitting I’m not perfect and can be an asshole about things and somebody basically said that’s not ok either #so it’s like whatever I do sucks anyway sjdjsdn #and that’s what bothers me I think. that I doubt I’d be shunned and blacklisted as a creator to THIS extent if people took the time to #actually ask me if the things people say are true and what my explanation is #anyways .. #mrow.org

[fellhellion]

Hm. Something I’ve been thinking about (since I never shut up about Miguel apparently) is the idea that maybe there’s not supposed to be, to his understanding of what happened, a singular canon event that he breaks when dipping dimensions, it’s more the idea that he “breaks” canon by no longer being present to carry out his own canon events, by wanting something outside of what was apparently predestined to him, and the universe punished him for it.

I broke [canon] once myself, he says, but he doesn’t name the event even as the examples he pulls up are labelled.

Perhaps the “event”, as the characters perceive it, could just be something as simple as by virtue of replacing alt!Miguel he negated the intended effect of the man’s death upon the world around him.

But I just wonder. Because the way Miguel speaks of this to Miles portrays his own wanting for something different as being what he thinks invoked that destruction.

“We all want to live the life we wish we had, believe me I’ve tried. And the harder I tried, the more damage I did. You can’t have it all, kid.”

I wanted something more, but Spider-Man’s fate is set. Any and all events, regardless of their nature. And defying that fate, trying to live a life beyond what it asked of me killed people.

If you alter your course from canon in any way, you hurt people.

#tunes talks spiderverse #long post #idk idk just thinking thoughts #I find it interesting to think of different ways we can interpret the same information #interpret the characters’ thinking in different ways #maybe they DO think alt!Miguel’s death was a canon event and our Miguel just didn’t know at the time #but i wonder. considering there’s a big overhanging metanarrative question about the purpose of suffering in spiderman stories #- asking us who suffers (Gwen being constantly fridged) and why - #it could be a matter of the characters thinking if they try escape or outwit ‘predetermined’ suffering the universe will only take more from #you #it’s so interesting to me because Miguel pre-dimension dip left because he felt such an absence of joy in his life #he was deeply unhappy and wanted something as simple as a happy family life #he doesn’t WANT to be in pain. some part of him resents the idea that this seems to be his lot in life #he resents it as much as Miles does. but he believes he needs to bear it because look what happened when u wanted better you hurt people #and like. have yammered about this in a previous post but I think part of his nasty rant at Miles is abt offloading some of that suppressed #resentment for the toll this fate has taken on him onto Miles #he blames Miles because Miles is THERE. you can control that at least. it’s not the intangible cosmic force that would apparently as soon as #murder you than change #it’s unfair of him to do so (offload onto Miles I mean) DEEPLY unfair and inappropriate behaviour. #but also god. is the desire not to hurt anymore so human. is the idea of RESENTING that hurt being ur lot in life human #the narratives��they’re foiling….

[puppyeared]

Nothing wrong with my lisp actually it makes me very sexy and women want me and the wrath of god is not enough to describe how cool it is

#my aunt dissed my lisp again🙃 and I’m sick of it #cause jas is growing her front teeth in and my aunt was like haha I hope she doesn’t get a lisp like you that would be embarrassing lmao #and my mom brought it up just a while ago like ‘you went quiet and didn’t say anything but if u did I was gonna say s th to #*smth too’. and I was like ???? what do you mean #I didn’t actually hear what my aunt said so I just didn’t know what to say LMAO. but I really wish she’d stop doing that #like. I have an open bite and I COULD get surgery to fix it but it’s not like it’s hurting me lmao #it does make stuff inconvenient when I bite stuff and my teeth can’t touch and yeah my lisp but like. other than that nothing wrong #why does she like pushing my buttons. like I know relatives like asking how you are and teasing u but there was literally no reason for her #to bring that up :o/ sorry I just need to get this all out #fuck you I hope jas does have a lisp. then we can be lisp buddies #my mom literally asked me a couple months ago ‘hey do you think you’re shy bc your aunt made fun of your lisp when you were a kid’ and I was #like YES. I FUCKING HATE IT. WHENEVER I SPEAK I WANTED TO DIE WHEN I WAS A KID #don’t fucking do that to a kid oh my god. even if you think it’s small stuff like a stutter or a lisp shut the fuck UP oh my GOD #vent #yapping

[satanfemme]

with every passing day I just grow more anti-psych tbh. like. burn the whole industry to the ground and start over lol

#don't unfollow me I've literally got brain problems myself and support mental disorder rights and etc etc etc #but I’m serious. especially lately with the recent influx of casual ableism... has anyone else noticed that too or? #would apologize for not listing examples of what I mean but honestly.... there's so many examples just Look Around You #and it gets to the point where you ask ''is it fair to label all 'dangerous' people mentally ill?'' and the answer is: #any label that is being applied to both social classes ''serial killers'' and ''trauma/abuse victims'' is a fucking meaningless label 100% #and needs to be scrapped. #idc about who is or isn't ''technically'' mentally ill. it's a label that's being applied. look at who it's applied to. #if you think ''mentally ill'' is a neutral - let alone positive - label in our society idk where u live #and if u think about the full subjectivity of the mentally ill label - as well as individual diagnoses labels - for even one second #where stigmatizing labels can be applied or taken away by authority figures to anyone for any fucking reason they want! #...I mean! u see why maybe it's all kinda just one big pseudoscience huh! #even if ur using diagnoses for the ''correct'' reasons it's still borderline meaningless too tbh #you wanna diagnose people to 1. help understand a set of disabling traits that commonly co-exist in individuals #and 2. help predict the best course of ''treatment'' for that subjective group of traits #but???? I mean. actually look at this exact diagnosis process in action #where it's all about just Guessing based on ?personal anecdote and the therapist's personal biases??????? #''you're sad a lot of the time. obviously this is because your brain is fucking broken with Too-Sad-Disorder -- #-- no we aren't gonna do any objective medical tests lol I'm the doctor here I can tell your brain is broken just by looking at u obv 🙄'' #and that's how u get diagnosed like 100 dif drugs to fix an environmental problem. it's insane #the way therapists are always underdiagnosing or overdiagnosing or #''well XYZ disorder is very rare and usually happens in rich boys so I think you have Hysterical Bitch Disorder instead <3'' #and u can't even ''well not all therapists'' this cause like. why is it that every single person I know has had experiences like this #if it were really an isolated problem it would not be so universal. nor would it be fundamental to the field's knowledge #how is it anything more than a guessing game at best? #I'm serious. anyway. I wish every psych institution a very die

[reikunrei]

oh no i have will/mike brainrot today..... uh oh

#many thoughts happening in my head #thinking up the myriad of ways the truth could come out #i mean it's OBVIOUS theyll do something w the painting #or at least it's obvious to us and would be Dumb if they didnt #have mike be like 'hey um.. why did u lie about that' #imagining mike saying that and will just freaking out bc like #he Wants to tell mike he wants to SO BADLY #but at the same time. what if mike HATES him is DISGUSTED or smthn #so he tries to run away #but mike reaches out to him and grabs his hand or his arm and is like no wait! #bc hes terrified too and he needs to get this cleared up so he can know #if he can ask his heart rate to slow down #and they just. stare at each other #and mike asks again. gently. did you lie about it? #hes not mad. but he Has to know #and will just. caves. and admits it #he's says yeah i. thought you needed to hear that. that el was still thinking about you #while you guys were apart. that it would make you feel better #and it breaks mike's heart bc it did make him feel better but not as good as the truth #SEE BRAINROT I HAVE TO GO BYE #i say things #stranger things //

[ihatebnha]

NO BC IM SO DISTRAUGHT OVER THE NEW SPOILERS LIKE IM SO SPEECHLEESS IM JUST !????!????????

RIGHT I LITERALLY HAD A WHOLE ASS PANIC ATTACK ON MY OTHER BLOG THINKING ABOUT like i really had to sit in silence for a whole 45 minutes just trying to process. i feel better now bc i thought abt fucking him when he's all better in 10 years and NOT DEAD but SERIOUSLY!!! IT'S SO DISTRESSING!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!

horikoshi wasn't right for this AT ALLLLLLLLL. not one bit. not even an ounce. A CRUMB. and i'm dragging shigaraki back to middle school right where he belongs so he can START OVER!!! and while i'm at it, eri... we could use ur help TOO.

#no because... i dont understand... i DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY HORI WOULD GIVE US A BAKUGO DEATH SCARE TWICE #SO IM REALLY NERVOUS #PART OF ME IS LIKE OH YOU KNOW HE'LL BE FINE BUT LIKE... #why do we have to w a t c h #why does he gotta lose and arm definitely possibly??? #i hate it i hate it i hate im soooooooo nervous it doesnt feel right #it hurts my soul ajsdkfadskj #even tho i do like my men a lil... beat up looking if u know what i mean #ANYWAY AND AIZAWA TOO #TALKING ABOUT HOW HE NEEDS TO GRADUATE #i hope my eyeballs fall out #i really do #bakugo were gonna fight this dam war for u #ask #anon #caitie chats #bnha spoilers

[iloveyoumorethansoup]

Update on my mental health testing I’ve been doing since I finally got my diagnosis. I was not diagnosed with adhd or ocd like I thought I’d be. Apparently there is a disorder for inattentiveness due to screen time that I’m diagnosed with but was told that doesn’t cover all of my issues. And then I was told that I’d need some more testing to prove this but the psychologist testing me thinks that I just have too high of an iq and am simply bored. Catch me making a list of symptoms now both good and bad

#my iq is just too high. if that’s it I swear I’m gonna lose it. I’m bored?? that’s my problem??? everything’s too easy??? #yeah so I get an iq test next fall #she’s like I think that would cover a lot of things! and also why you’re able to be doing relatively ok in life #like girl I’m suffering out here #anyways. my tests all mostly asked about what I struggled with which is mostly just. no motivation procrastination #but my day to day life?? includes obsessing over the things I love checking in online like clockwork and definitely obsessing over my things #little witch single handedly is shaping huge parts of my life bc I love it so much and definitely not a normal amount #like. I’m taking odd classes I would have never taken moving even more cross country in a year to do voice acting and just like #dedicating tons and tons of time to just. interacting with people who love the show as much as I do as well as making my friends watch it #i am by no means upset with my diagnosis my psychologist was like this is the thought you need lots more testing tho #with an additional hey I put in ur results that I’ll give to the school that u clearly need help and to get you in for more testing #also she did mention that if I wanted to totally rule out the screen time thing I’d probably have to do like a complete detox for 60 days #which is certainly not feasible for school I have to take digital notes or else I will fail classes but also #quite frankly I’d die. like my mental health would speed run itself so far down I would simply die #so! i certainly will not allow that to happen bc I’m not interesting in seeing how hot glued my brain is together via the internet #probably very. but yeah essentially I have gained nothing except my time on the waitlist is up #¯\_(ツ)_/¯ #soup talks