#I was so nervous with the wait I almost got sick last week lol but I finally know I'm so happy!!! | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

woah-uhuh-uhuh-uhuh · 7 months

Text

Christine Canigula was socially ostracized & developed a complex to protect herself: an essay

(suddenly i NEED to infodump about Christine actually so here)

Something I only noticed on rewatch: the way Christine will say something silly and then just kind of gingerly wait to see if Jeremy reacts well to it before continuing, almost like she's asking permission?? (e.g. the gap after the first stanza of "Play Rehearsal"). And it's only after he riffs off her bowling alley bit that she feels comfortable talking about her personal feelings with him (right before "Guy that I'd Kinda be Into"). The same happens with their "weird noise" exchange immediately before "It's pretty killer to sit and chat with you." I know theater relies on being succinct, and that 'bonding over shared quirks' and 'feelings talk' are both just crucial parts of relationship development... but I don't think it's a coincidence that it always goes in that order!

It's like Jeremy has to pass these *trials of weirdness* before she feels safe opening up to him and it drives me BONKERS so I wrote a whole 1000 word thing about it under the cut and this got too massive and I'm sorry. Also some autistic Jeremy meta at the end if that sweetens the pot hehehe

Table of contents:

Why she was ostracized

How she was ostracized

How that might inform her pattern of relationship development with Jeremy and Jake

How gender caused Jeremy's experiences to differ from hers, and how that affects their current relationships with "popularity" and peer acceptance.

1. Why she was ostracized

I am just so certain that Christine has been bullied or at least majorly outcast for a lot of her life. She's very obviously neurodivergent and because of that she can have these obnoxiously deep and repetitive interests, she can't judge if a piece of information will be genuinely interesting to someone, and she doesn't take social cues very well.

She frequently interrupts people when they're talking (an ADHD symptom btw), even when they're literally talking to her about the thing she wants to hear!

(C: "Do you find that? Because I totally find that!" J: "Uh, yeah, I-" C: "-And no matter how hard I try....")

(J: "I know the last thing I deserve is another shot, but-" C:"Jeremy, just... say what's on your mind.") (girl I'm sorry but that's what he was doing..... I have a whole other thoughtpiece on how this particularly fucks with Jeremy while they're dating but thats another thing...)

She doesn't seem confident in her interpretations of people's emotions and she'll ask/talk about them point blank (both theirs and her own) in a way a lot of people would find rude

("Uh, you seem really nervous...") ("Popular people are fucked up! *mutual laughter* …I mean, you're one of them!") ("I am flattered, this is new / still I'm not sure what I should do" <- as a response to getting asked out, that's pretty bold! Plus the entire part where she laughs at Jake's "rich boy routine") (also compare and contrast to Jeremy's "I don't know what I'm supposed to say right now." idk. are your allistic stage dorks in the room with us right now motherfuckers)

I'd go on about her hyperfixations/special interests too but I think Play Rehearsal pretty much sums it up lol

2. How she was ostracized

All this to say that I am CERTAIN she spent a lot of her schooling having "nice girls" patiently let her sit with them at lunch for weeks at a time until they finally get sick of her rambling and faux pas. Only when they leave does Christine realize that they didn't actually care about anything she said... And this happens over and over and over. (I know this seems hella specific but I swear it's an actual phenomenon... at least I'm pretty sure? sdjflksjf)

But anyway, it's clear that by the time they're juniors, Christine has kind of (and I do only mean kind of) figured out what behaviour other people respond poorly to. And from evidence I stated in the intro, I think she's become really careful about which people she lets herself get attached to. She doesn't want this to ever happen again - which means if she's going to hang out with someone, she has to know that they actually care about her, that they know she will sometimes be obnoxious or blunt, and they'll still be okay with that forever.

3. Applying this to her canon relationships

You can extend this to Jake, someone who sees her in her element in drama rehearsal (the thing everyone finds annoying about her because she won't shut up about it) and STILL likes her. I think it's a totally valid reading that her bluntness with him later ("Upgrade") is just because she misreads him / doesn't quite get the social standard that she should be white lying instead. But I think you could also read her as testing the waters. If she's really going to commit to dating this guy, she's gotta know he's okay with her being herself. And the fact that this guy (and I think it's significant that he is a boy, for reasons I'll explain in the end note) genuinely seems to like her is a whole new level of peer validation ("I am flattered, this is new") -- so of course she's gonna fall at least a little! It doesn't hurt that he's "tired of being the person that everyone thinks that I am..." just like her!

Her history with being pity-liked makes Chloe's "advice," that Jake's just toying with her and is going to move on soon, even scarier, because that's genuinely happened to her (on a platonic level) so many times before.

Jeremy is also a good candidate from the beginning because he's weird he's a weirdo he doesn't fit in and he doesn't wanna fit in you ever see him without this stupid cardigan on? that's weird! And she keeps warming up to him not only because they're getting to know each other but because he gets progressively more willing to not only tolerate (as Jake does) but *participate* in her weirdness!

First, she does something weird and he tolerates it ("Play Rehearsal"); the next time she's weird, he participates! (bowling ball before GTIKBI). Then finally finally finally he initiates the weirdness and lets her join in! ("weird noises" exchange before GTIKBI reprise).

And notably, it is THIS moment that canonically signifies that they've hit the apex of their canon relationship development. If there was an achievement called "Befriend Christine," it would have popped up right then and there!!!

IN CONCLUSION: YOUR HONOR I LOVE THEM T_T

4: Christine vs. Jeremy: Gender differences & how that ultimately impacts their social goals

I also think all of this would have happened to Jeremy too if he'd been a girl. But because, generally, young boys feel less social obligation than girls to take pity on the autistic kid (and because boys tend to be more quickly recognized as autistic) he just ends up completely alone for most of his school life (Michael nonwithstanding - and yeah there's an important distinction between your childhood friend putting up with you and knowing that, woah, I guess literally nobody else ever will).

Meanwhile, Christine has had people "put up" with her, and she's SICK OF IT!

That's part of why their complexes are so different, because Christine is trying to check everyone she meets to make sure they'll be okay with her weirdness before she gets attached, Jeremy is trying to eliminate his weirdness altogether because he's never even experienced his peers listening out of *pity* so how the hell can he expect someone to ever listen to him out of *interest?*

Jeremy has never had someone pretend to like him before, so he completely lacks Christine's fear of befriending someone who secretly hates you. He doesn't realize how bad it'll hurt him if he destroys his real self for popularity, if he befriends people who would have bullied his real self. He doesn't know what disingenuous friendship feels like, so like a very young Christine he's still actively trying to get there because he thinks it's the only kind of validation he'll ever get.

Do you see what im saying? Do you see it???? AUAUGUGUUGGH

THANK YOU FOR READING!!! If you have thoughts or even rebuttals please share i am so desperate to discuss the blorbos

#theres gender theres autism theres stagedorks what more could you want #bmc #be more chill #christine bmc #christine canigula #jeremy heere #stagedorks #bmc meta #my posts #meta #essay #my meta #jeremy #christine #character analysis #guys academia ruined me actually #this literally genuinely hits the full word count requirement for a midterm paper i was supposed to start writing today #but instead i did this

121 notes · View notes

iateyourwaffles · 2 years

Text

Hey. I haven’t been here for a while. Almost for about half a year, I think. I’m sorry. My mental health hasn’t been very well since sometime around late last year, as well as my physical health. I’m sorry for disappearing for a while. I’ve been having lots of physical pain and d/ental pain since late last year, around the holidays. I had lots of appointments for d/octors and d/entists and such throughout early this year during winter. After that though, I was still in pain, I went back to my d/entist and they said that I had to go see a specialist. I went to see one, had to go to a big hospital, and I was diagnosed with a muscular joint issue which affects the face and mouth. I have to live with it, unfornately, but my specialist said that there’s ways to treat it, like to help ease the pain. Also I have to go through a clea/ning next month, and I’m a bit worried, cause my mouth, jaw, and t/eeth are usually always in pain, and my t/eeth are sensitive due to my joint issues. I would like to get it worked though, cause I drink coffee and tea often, and I have some v/isible stains that are quite hard to clean. I have been having anxiety and been worrying a lot about my t/eeth and bones and such ever since I have been diagnosed with this issue. I can hardly eat these days and sometimes it’s hard to open my mouth too wide. I may also have a nerve issue but I need to go to a certain d/octor for that.

Now days, I have been trying to avoid getting too worked up. I get stressed easily and upset easily. I was diagnosed with emotional disorder when I was very young, so I cry easily and such. I’m also autistic. I get a bit overwhelmed at times and I let stuff get to me. I got upset a while back, cause I was treated like a k/id, and I personally don’t like that too much, cause I’m an adult. I don’t mind being called a ‘k/id’, by much older adults though. I just don’t really like being treated like one. I do a lot though cause of the way I act, and the stuff I like, and there’s s/imple things I don’t understand at times. I got a bit upset, and it made my face and jaw hurt a lot. Once I calmed down and had some soup, it settled, though. I feel like when I eat or drink something warm, it helps eases the p/ain a bit.

My specialist said that I should wear a mouth g/aurd. I tried, but the instructions were hard for me to understand. I tried a bunch of p/ain r/elievers but they didn’t really do much. My specialist p/rescribed me some rexlaxers and they help, and make me sleep, lol. But I have to eat cause sometimes they make me get sick. The last time I went was about a month ago, and they said they wish there was something they could do, but they said I have to go to a different d/octor that specializes in what I have. It’s hard to find one that will ac/cept me. I might have to go to one in the b/igger c/ity somewhere. Also a while after that, I had to stay in my h/ouse for about a week cause one of my family members got s/ick. They are okay now and fully recovered, which is good, cause I was worried. My b/rother gets sick easily and has been sick when he was growing up, so I was worried about him a lot. I’m glad he’s okay.

So, yeah. I have been going through quite a lot since around the holidays late last year. However, some good things have happend though. My b/rother’s partner adopted a kitten. That and I was a top ra/nk score during an in game e/vent in one of the games I play. I got a t/100 t/itle, which I thought was pretty cool. It made me kinda happy, since I usually don’t really achieve anything. I k/now it’s not much, but as a fan it made me happy. I’m also not very good at games, lol. I also got a few plushies of a character I like. The plushies hasn’t been in the mail yet, but I’m patiently waiting for them to arrive. I also want to cosplay as my favorite character again this year for fall. I haven’t got the costume yet, but I will soon.

I’m a bit nervous about my next appointment at the d/entist for cleaning, but maybe I’ll be alright. A part of me says I will. I’ve been a bit worried about it that I get b/ad dreams sometimes and I fi/nd it hard to sleep.

So, that’s what’s been happening. Sorry, for not being here for about h/alf a y/ear.

#personal #long post #also another game i got t/300 which was pretty cool too #so yeah this m/uscle j/oint issue is hard to live with #it s kinda hard to talk too much so i try not to #also i have to eat soft foods and such #i usually just eat ramen soup these days and banana #my brothers partners cat is adorable #my brother says that he will try and talk back to you like he meows after you say something to him #i usually see him through video chat since my brother usually lives with his partner and stays here during the weekend and days off #he works in the b/ig c/ity #he shows me the cat during video chat the cat is adorable #my aunt has the same joint issue and she said it will be okay and gave me some advice #i actually have been having signs of the joint issue since i was in junior high #however it didn't cause p/ain i just had a clicking noise around my jaw when i walked and it would stop after a while #though i guess since im much older now it s starting to get w/orse #sorry for all the tags #might reblog this later #if you read all this than yay heres a cookie x p

2 notes · View notes

anxiouspregnantlady · 2 months

Text

hello again

Hi. Um, yeah, I'm pregnant.

I had the miscarriage around Christmas and then a period towards the end of Jan. We weren't originally planning to try that cycle, but had a halfhearted change of heart, kind of "eh", when I realized I was about to ovulate.

This month has been so full of craziness (sickness all around, k's job interviews, me consolidating jobs), I didn't think too too much about the possibility of being pregnant. Obviously I didn't not think about it, but it wasn't top of mind. I had labs drawn around 7dpo because I wanted to check my testosterone & DHEA-S levels (really low, but double what it used to be) to see if I should continue my supplements. Other labs confirmed I'd ovulated.

I was expecting my period on a Saturday, and on Friday night I thought I saw the faintest of faint pink, or peachy orange really, when I wiped. We discussed the possibility of calling our fertility clinic on Monday to do an out-of-pocket IUI cycle.

But then Saturday came and went and I had no bleeding. Sunday came and went - still no bleeding. By Sunday I was started to get a bit nauseous and I had all my weird pregnancy symptoms: sore boobs, burping nonstop, acid reflux. I think I was hesitant to test because I just couldn't believe it would be positive, and a good positive at that. I've never had the "classic" experience of girl misses period, girl takes test, test is blazing positive, happily ever after. I'm either testing out my trigger or testing after the bloodwork results are out lol. Or testing negative, or testing really really faint for a chemical pregnancy.

K made me test. I took the cheapie strip pictured the minute we put P to bed. Lo and behold. Instant strong positive. We were SO HAPPY :) I was shaking and crying a lot - could hardly believe it. I didn't even know I could have a proper pregnancy unassisted, let alone so quickly. This was 18dpo. I sprung (as I do) into action and purchased a $28 hcg blood test for the next day (got a 20% discount coupon, too).

I think I was really, really happy for about 24-36 hours. Other than the fact that the test looked so nice and dark, I couldn't really explain it. I was surprised that anxiety hadn't shown up for a full day. I did my labwork the next day, plus the FRER, which bummed me out a little because I'd hoped it would be a bit more dramatic, but it was still a good test line.

On Tuesday I went for acupuncuture. I was a little nervous to tell my acupuncturist because she'd told me to wait 6 months to try. But she was so happy for me, and I teared up a little bit. She told me in her merry way that it was a boy (lol) based on my pulse. At this point I was pretty nauseous, could barely eat two bites of my croissant that morning. When I finished my appointment I got in the car and saw that my labwork results were in. It took forever to load and I couldn't find the result on the pdf report. And then I finally saw that it was 1,361 (at 19dpo), and I got really happy again. Called Karl ecstatically. This is so much higher than it was last go-around - 289 at 18dpo - and about the same as with Phillipa, 981 at 18dpo.

Thursday I had a telehealth appointment with my midwife Lisa, who literally just did an endometrial biopsy for me 3 weeks ago. She was also so happy to see me. She gave me a script for an ultrasound and encouraged me to come in earlier for my first appointment if I wanted to.

Today is Friday. I've made my ultrasound appointment - first available one that I can plausibly go to is March 19th - which is a full week later than I was hoping. I'll be 7w6d, or almost 8w.

Today I'm 5w2d. I feel TERRIBLE. I'm surprised by the exhaustion. I cannot stay awake. I can barely get through work, or driving, or anything really. I am nauseous, more powerfully so than last time, but not throwing up yet. It's early days. Those are probably the main two. Oh hang on, headaches. Bleaugh. Those have been pretty bad.

Overall, my strategy is NO REDDIT and PRESUME ALL IS WELL.

I am also very thirsty / drinking a lot of water + electrolytes. So far I can drink bone broth. K bought me a giant thing of cape cod salt and vinegar chips - THE BEST.

Interestingly, I have no desire to partake in my bumpers group this time. It all feels really tired. Like, I've seen it all before, it's kind of annoying.

I am focusing on being kind of SELFISH and making sure i get the rest and support i need. I am also trying to skate by at work, which has been such a struggle.

OK, getting way too tired from writing this. Going to nap before I have to pick P.

0 notes

baekhvuns · 2 years

Note

Baeeeeeeeek hey hi hello, sorry for disappearing, but I had crazy couple of days, I got better, now I'm sick again I HAVE C-WORD 🤡🤡🤡 I had some shitty moments, but I also saw Sunmi twice, I travelled a lot and attended two kpop parties. I wrote you a message last week when I had some time and shit got deleted CAN YOU BELIEVE so I gave up 😭💀

ANYWAYS SO MUCH ATEEZ CONTENT SO MUCH SEONGHWA TOO?!?! I consumed so much kpop offline I have no clue what's going on online tbh

ROCKSTAR SEONGHWA I'M ON MY KNEES I'M BAWLING MY EYES OUT. And it's DV Seonghwa GOODBYE (alexa play Sayonara Hitori) I'm here to remind you who you belong to. School boy delinquent Hwa, baker Hwa, farmer Hwa... the material here...*faints* so many AUs

👁👅👁

ALSO BESTIE I HAD NO TIME TO SAY BUT I WON TWO MORE FAN CALLS I finally scored another OT8 one, I caaaaaaaaant, I need to wait until this weekend since they were busy with KCON. But the other call with Seonghwa has already happened, but let me tell you about the first call - it's long overdue 😭:

First he greeted me so sweetly and said he missed me 🥴 I told him I missed him as well and sadly couldn't see them perform recently, so he told me he was sorry, but we will definitely meet again and "noona we go way back, if I can say this now, I'm happy whenever I see fans who have been with us for a long time and didn't leave, thank you so much for your kind words, you're always very lovely to me. I hope you can rely on me and all of us in the times of sadness!" and I stopped functioning for a moment, almost teared up then thanked him and congratulated on a successful comeback and sprinkled some compliments in the middle and Hwa went "now I'm gonna cry" so I quickly showed him my Lego flowers, he was really happy and told me about the SW set he pre-ordered then asked if there's a set I really want to get and I was like "Real Madrid stadium" hahahha (gotta spread the Madridista agenda) and we talked about his time in Madrid for a moment.

Then I asked about his fave outfit during Guerrilla comeback and this man... he went "uh I'm showing a lot of *gestures to his bicep and proceeds to show it off* this time round, I think it's a bit scandalous" (side note but, man literally showed us his stomach and nipples before yet somehow his arms feel more illegal lol) and I was like "y-yeah... we can see, we like it" which definitely pleased him. Last thing was me asking about his fave moments from this year apart from touring and Seonghwa said "we get to film a lot of cool variety, seniors invited us to their shows, it's such an honour, like Sunmi sunbaenim - I was so nervous and happy" then I mentioned seeing Sunmi soon and Hwa got jealous lol, I also said I've been a fan of hers for almost 14 years and he went "wow noona has a lot of kpop experience, in 2008 I was...10" and I went "yeah, are you calling me old?" and boy went "😳" - flustering Seonghwa again mission accomplished. 💞

Yeah so that's basically it, he told me to have fun at the concert, but also "come and see Seonghwa soon" (he promised to come to me lol, I'll sue him if he doesn't). The fan call was actually 3 minutes??!?! I didn't know and at some point I wanted to wrap it up and Hwa told me we still had one minute to go, lmao.

I'll report about the other ones soon, but for now let's go back to dying! Hope you're doing well ❤ - DV 💖

the way i logged in and saw ur ask and screamed bc i was like where did dv anon go 😭😭

omg??? HOW ARE U ITS BEEN SO LONG BFFB NAUR NAURRRRR 😭😭😭😭 RIGHT AFTER THE BRONCHITIS???? bestie are u okay 😭😭 OOOOOOOO HOW WAS SUNMI i also travelled a lot !! visited the oldest china town in canada and then went to a haunted inn <3 LMFAOOOO NO WAY DBDBDB IT WASNT MEANT TO BE THEN I was not gonna respond either way bc i had bare to no time last two weeks but i do now!! for a week or two!

ANYWAYS SO MUCH ATEEZ CONTENT SO MUCH SEONGHWA TOO?!?! I consumed so much kpop offline I have no clue what's going on online tbh

SO MUCH CONTENT??? NEW SHOWS??? SEONGHWAS ARMS????

LMFAOOOO NOT SAYONARA HITORI DBDBD did u just say school delinquent hwa. bc. BAKER HWA??? STOP I JUST IMAGINED HIM IN THOSE FRILLY APRONS TOO 😭😭 bestie have u watched the way of househusband, is that not mafia hwa / mingi 🔫

delinquent hwa?? u say??

👁👅👁

TWO MORE??? IM SCREAMING BFMWDHKS AS U SHOULD OMG SCREAMING THE LUCK U HAVE DBDBD did u get a pola from all ur albums 🔫🔫

HOW TO BE U WHEN IS IT OUT TURN FHWNFJWHDJW the call sounds so sweet and wholesome 😭😭😭🤚🏼 he’s so nice pls fbwndjke his wide ass eyes too 😭😭🤚🏼 FHWKDJWK AS U SHOULD, SPREAD IT EVERYWHERE but manchester won yesterday?? 🤌🏼

“y-yeah..we can see”

STOP FHWKDHWKHEKW IM SCREAMING JFBWKDHWK WHEN HE SAY NOONA IM BNDDNDJ THIS IS SO FUN AND CUTE PLS I HOPE U GET EVEN MORE CALLS BC UR GUY’S INTERACTIONS ARE FUN FBFB

it reminds me of this 😭

GO !!! SEE !!! SEONGHWA !!! SOON !!! i might also!! if i get the tickets tmr and convince my parents for a flight 📉📉📈📉 LMFAOOOO SUE HIM DO IT FBFBF ADD SOME EXTRA BICEP EXPOSING CHARGES ON HIM TOO,,, LMFAOOOO I HOPE U GET BETTER SOON!! keep cleaning ur nose bc that’ll literally save u from pain 😭😭😭 have a tissue box w u at all times and drink warmer water!!! watch some show’s while ur at it too! big mouth, extraordinary attorney woo and model family!! get loads of rest !!!

sorry?? & a uquiz bc it’s been way to long <3

#✉️ : ask #dv 💖 anon

1 note · View note

tolerateit · 3 years

Note

🐻

Animal anon doesn't like to share too much about themselves, but guess what? Animal anon is back and can actually send messages to everyone instead of starting and bailing because they are OFFICALLY DONE WITH THE BAR EXAM. It was traumatizing to say the least, and I may have failed, but nonetheless, a huge accomplishment! So since this year has been difficult for so many, I want you to share with me, what is one accomplishment that you are proud of this year? Mine can be taking the bar while working full time. It can anything from I survived this year, to I switched careers, to anything! Whatever makes YOU proud. And here's a cute bear to celebrate all the accomplishments we've completed during this hell of a year!

As always, feel free to tag "animal anon" so I can go through and see all your wonderful accomplishments and feel free to tag anyone who you think needs a visit from animal anon who hasn't gotten one yet. Let's celebrate! 🥳💕

Hiii animal anon i kinda saved this ask bc I was waiting for some news and here we go!! First of all, the bar??? That is so cool all best omg, im so proud of you!! And for something that I did that I'm proud of this year - I got into the uni of my dreams <333

#Animal anon #you ask for the tab*#I was so nervous with the wait I almost got sick last week lol but I finally know I'm so happy!!!

8 notes · View notes

ptergwen · 3 years

Text

sensation

w/c: 4.6k

warnings: some swearing, suggestive tings, and a pretty bad ending

summary: it’s the last night of your world tour, and tom has the perfect way to celebrate

a/n: i know y’all have been waiting for this one! everyone really loved when worlds collide but i ran out of ideas for it lol sorry... anyways my solution was to turn it into a oneshot :D based off the au!! i’m honestly nervous about posting this cuz a lot of you asked for it and i don’t wanna disappoint but i tried my absolute hardest to make it special <3 please enjoy

“thank you so much! we love you!” you shout to the audience, laughing breathlessly when they shout back. one of your dancers pulls you into a side hug, you throwing your arm around his neck. “we’re so fucking lucky you chose us, that you came all the way here. i’ve seen some of you back at night one. wow.” your voice gets wobbly, thinking about how loyal your fans are.

the tour started in new york, and they’ve followed you here to london.

tonight is an emotional night for everyone. you’re about to wrap your last show before you continue again in the summer. touring the u.k. has been a dream, and you’re just as thrilled to travel the rest of the world after your break. it’s bittersweet because you’re going to miss the hell out of your crew and the millions of lovely faces you’ve sang to each week. but, you do get to spend your time off with a special someone.

he’s watching you from the sound booth, sending fond smiles and loud cheers your way. thanks to you, tom has been at every show you’ve played in england. he brought harry along this time because he’s also a fan and wanted to see you. well, tom is more than a fan at this point. you’d say he’s more of a boyfriend. you haven’t discussed labels just yet.

your dates have mainly been over facetime, since you live on opposite sides of the world with insane schedules. a heartthrob actor and international popstar is quite the combination. you’ve only seen each other in person a couple of times, the first being pretty recently.

zendaya brought tom along to hang out with you in los angeles. he happened to be there recording some lines for a movie. she saw your concert earlier that night and invited him to crash the dinner plans you’d made, resulting in the best surprise and most fun you’ve ever had. the other time you enjoyed each other’s company was one weekend in paris. that was... something.

besides those two miracles, everything between you and tom happens through a screen. you’ll down bottles of champagne or keep warm under blankets while talking about your days. it’s nice, having someone on the other end who listens and actually hears you. tom gets it. you both do.

finishing your tour in london is convenient because not only will you have tom to comfort you, but you get to stick around for a while. he’s invited you to stay at his place. you can’t wait to meet the other holland’s, his friends, and obviously tessa.

“fuck, i’m gonna cry. i’m already crying,” you announce to the crowd, though they can tell from the tears streaming down your face. more dancers huddle around you and turn your single hug into a group one. you’re laughing and sobbing and holding on tight to everyone. fans bawl their own eyes out, the fact that this is it starting to settle in. the onstage crew even gets choked up, seeing you like this.

tom pouts from where he’s watching. he wishes he could run up there and squeeze you tight, but he’ll have to save that for when you’re done.

“i love you all so much, literally every single one of you in this room,” you tell everyone for the nth time tonight, swiping a perfectly manicured finger under your eyes. “my lighting crew, sound crew, my band, my fearless fucking dancers-“ a hiccup cuts you off. people burst into fits of giggles, which is a much needed tension breaker. you adjust your headset so the mic doesn’t pick up any other bodily noises.

grinning, you rest your arm on a shorter dancer’s shoulder, then go on. “sorry, sorry. i just wanna say, like, three more thank you’s before i get out of here.” there’s a chorus of no’s and encouraging whistles at the mention of you leaving. you blink back more tears to delay the breakdown you’re going to have. “thank you to my friends who always show up for me.”

with a knowing smile, you glance over at tom. “and, thank you to my more than a friend.” he smiles back, both hands held over his heart. harry elbows him in congratulations. more screaming erupts from the crowd as they realize where you’re looking and who you’re looking at. this will be sure to spark some headlines. whatever, you’re used to trending on every possible social media platform by now.

“this is the big one,” you preface, taking in a breath while everyone quiets down again. “thank you to you guys. for trusting me, for caring about what i have to say in any way. i feel your love. i really do, and i hope you feel mine.” your fans yell that they love you back, dancers gently swaying you side to side, emotions on high. there’s one last song, and it’s over.

“this has been the sensation tour, and i’ve been your host. was i good?” you try to lighten the mood, earning a bunch of what sound like positive shrieks. the earpiece you have in makes it hard to tell. “y’all were even better.” exchanging looks with your dancers, you pull out of the hug so you can get to your mark for the finale. they follow your lead. music comes through the speakers.

“i’ll see you again soon, okay? i promise. here’s sensation,” you introduce the song, immediately bursting into more tears. it’s torture to say goodbye. thankfully, you have the most incredible fans on earth, so they sing along with you at the top of their lungs. that includes tom and harry, your ultimate stans.

when the show is over, you run right off stage and over to tom. he’s waiting on the side with actual heart eyes for you. you practically leap into his arms, a hand cradling the back of his head, both his arms draped low and tight around your body.

“you were so amazing up there! absolutely smashed it, darling,” tom breathes out. his face is smushed between your neck and mostly bare chest. “thanks, tom. seriously, thanks for being here tonight and every other.” you smile a tired smile and wind your other arm around his neck. he presses some light you’re welcome kisses to your skin. “mm, thanks for having me. how’s it feel to be done?”

you sigh, fingers running through his curls. “like the biggest relief, and also really sad.” you’re such a mess that you could cry again on the spot. tom senses it and lifts his head up to see if you’re alright. “super depressing,” you surprisingly reiterate without the waterworks. “i know the feeling. you’ll be back soon, though. you said it,” he murmurs, a grin on his lips as they brush against the corner of yours.

you’re about to kiss him properly, then one of your dancers comes up to you. you’d forgotten that there are still stage managers and security everywhere, too. you get completely lost in tom whenever you’re together.

“you killed, babe,” coco greets you, linking your arm in hers. tom takes the hint and lets go of you. he watches on with a smirk. “nah, you murdered,” you send the compliment back and bite your lower lip. “i dunno, i feel like someone murdered me!” there’s coco with her dramatics. she’s genuinely hilarious, your shared sense of humor playing a huge part in your friendship.

she brings your free hand to her heart. you gasp at how fast it’s going. “that shit is really beating, coco. are you, like, okay?” “probably not. it was the freestyle that got me.” coco went a lot harder than usual tonight, since it was her last big dance break for a while. she puffs air from her cheeks and nods to tom. “this your man?”

“yeah, you could say that. i’m tom,” he answers, holding out a hand for her. “coco.” she pulls it like you would in a handshake. you beam at them, one of your best friends and unofficial boyfriend finally meeting. “sounds promising. i approve,” coco mutters to you. bumping your hip into hers playfully, you take one of tom’s hands in both of yours.

“aw, we have your blessing or something? your permission?” you coo and get a push at your shoulder from coco in return. tom chuckles, his thumb running over the back of your hand. “no! i was gonna say you should bring him out back,” coco clarifies, like it was obvious. you’re not sure what she’s on about. “uh, what’s out back?” you question. “an axe?” tom teases.

coco gestures to the nearest exit. “we’re having a little goodbye party in the parking lot. fire pit, snacks. remember?” nope, you’d completely forgotten. the idea first sounded like the perfect way to end your night, so you agreed to go. that was before you were dripping sweat and mentally exhausted. now, all you want to do is unwind with tom and tom only.

the superstar life is one you’re happy to lead, just not at this exact moment.

“i do now.” you muster up your most apologetic smile for coco, tugging on tom’s hand. “i’m sorry, co. i think we’re gonna pass.” her jaw drops. you’re never one to skip these things. “aw, for real? it’s our last night!” tom threads his fingers through yours while you talk. “bro, we’ve been together for almost a whole year,” you laugh out, nuzzling your cheek into tom’s chest. “get sick of me.”

“never,” coco deadpans. she catches you gazing up at tom, relaxing as his arms hug your middle. she’s known you long enough to tell what’s a fling and what’s real love for you. this is something special, and she can’t get in the way of it. she’ll let you navigate this yourself. “ok, just for tonight. you’ll text me?” coco gives you a real smile, raising an eyebrow at tom. he gathers that’s a good thing. he’s in.

“mhm. maybe we can hang out tomorrow,” you agree and let your eyes flutter shut. all that’s keeping you up are tom’s strong arms. “tell everyone i love them.” “i think they know.” coco shakes her head lightheartedly. tom laughs at her. “be good,” she tells him and means it, rubbing your back on her way to the lot. that leaves you and tom alone at last.

custodians are cleaning up the arena, fans are piling out, and you’re clinging to tom while his steady heartbeat grounds you. this is the only after party you need.

“harry’s got the car when you’re ready,” tom mumbles, tucking a piece of damp hair behind your ear. you loop your arms around his torso with a hum. “i was kinda wondering where he went.” “yeah?” he gives you a small smile. “gotta ask what he thought... of the show.” yawns are creeping past your lips, tonight’s events catching up to you.

“i like feedback from the fans, or stans,” you elaborate in your sleepy state. tom uses his fingertips to tap your temple. “what about me? i’m your biggest.” “i’ll, um, follow up with you later.” your words are slurring. “right now, home.” warmth spreads throughout tom’s entire body, his house becoming yours for a bit. “your chariot awaits,” he affirms before helping you to your dressing room.

after collecting your things, you follow tom out to the car. harry is in the driver’s seat, and you two slip into the back. he exchanges a look with his brother through the mirror while you settle on his shoulder. you’re hugging his bicep, his lips pressing to the side of your head.

“thank you for driving,” you speak softly to harry. he starts to pull out of the spot with a nod. “no problem. get to say i was y/n y/l/n’s chauffeur.” tom clicks his tongue even though harry is joking. you snicker at his remark, joking back. “you want the job? better be a five star ride, then.” your banter brings yet another smile to tom’s face. his family is everything to him, so seeing you get along so well means the most.

“right, right. did you have a good time?” harry wonders, twisting to see behind him while he turns around. he also peeks at you snuggled up to tom before facing forward. “great, actually. did you?” you check, the grin clear in your voice. harry goes into full stan mode. “no shit! you were brilliant, y/n. god, every note was just like how you did it the studio.” he’s raving, which is much appreciated by you.

“good answer.” tom shoots his brother a wink. “‘s that what you wanted to hear?” he asks in reference to your conversation earlier. your response is a kiss to his shoulder. “yay. i’m happy you liked it, harry.” he buzzes with excitement, having his favorite artist care what he thinks.

not much is said for the rest of the drive. tom and harry make some hushed conversation about golfing this weekend while you struggle to stay awake. they’re obsessed with that damn sport. it’s honestly nice to see, that tom has something he likes to do when he isn’t shooting hollywood’s biggest movies. your free time will finally give you the chance to discover other hobbies.

you stumble out of the car upon arriving to the boys’ place, a backpack on your shoulders and tom’s hand held tight in yours. you’ve got only a few essentials with you for tonight. the rest is on the tour bus, so you’ll gather it after your hangout with coco. besides, everything you need at the moment is right here.

“home sweet home,” tom announces as harry unlocks the front door. his words bring a tired smile to your face. “finally,” you exhale, keeping your fingers laced with tom’s and following the two of them inside. “i could show you around a bit, give you the grand tour. or-“ tom stops talking, feeling your weight on him. harry huffs at how oblivious his brother is.

“mate, she’s falling over. save it,” he suggests and kicks the door shut lazily. you’re done in. you’ve been having to lean on tom since the show ended. “another time, then,” tom mumbles, securing his arm around your waist. “there is one thing i wanna see.” your voice is low, body curled into tom’s side. he raises an eyebrow. “and that is?” “your room.”

tom takes that in a suggestive way, like he does most things. “we’re getting right to it, are we?” he questions, harry gagging and you nudging his arm with your head. “not like that, dummy. ‘cuz i’m sleepy.” there’s a beat of silence. “ask me again in-“ “wow, look at the time!” harry interrupts so he doesn’t have to hear the details. he’s sure he’ll witness enough after it happens. “off to bed i go! goodnight.”

he rushes to get to his room, yelling out, “great show, y/n!” on the way. “thank you! night!” you call back, tom letting out a sigh. “div of the century,” he says under his breath. “must run in the family,” you playfully retort. that gets you a firm poke at your side. “where’s everyone else?” you glance up at him. there should be two other idiots and a lovely, furry lady running around.

“tuwaine’s gone to the pub, harrison’s filming late, and tess is at mum and dad’s,” tom fills you in, grabbing your arm and draping it around his middle. doing him one better, you hug him with both. you squint in confusion about the last part. “they watch her when i’m out,” tom answers your unspoken question. “ah,” you nod, then deflate ever so slightly. “i wanted to meet her, though. the other boys, too.”

tom smooths the pad of his thumb over your cheek. “you will, darling. it’s only for tonight.” he kisses the same spot reassuringly. “we’ve got loads of time.” “yeah, we do,” you agree, instantly cheering up and letting your head fall onto his chest. “now, where’s your room?” “just upstairs. you need some help getting in?” he’s only playing around, but you accept, tightening your arms around his neck.

“show me the way,” you beam at him. “happy to.” tom wiggles his eyebrows, you jumping up. your legs wrap around his waist, his arms holding you against him. with a satisfied hum, you squish your face into his insanely soft shirt. “what a diva,” tom sarcastically complains while taking you to the staircase. “doesn’t even say please. no manners from this one.”

“you try dancing in six inch heels for two hours,” you shoot back, patting the side of his neck. he moves one hand down to your thigh for a better grip. you’re nearing the top of the stairs. “think i’ll leave that to you,” he decides and squeezes your thigh. “look at me, carrying the whole music industry.” your face easily gets hot and your words turn to murmurs. “shut up. you should listen to other songs.”

you’re on the second floor now, tom going for the first door. he frowns at his rejected compliment. “no, i like yours. they’re my favorite.” “really?” your muffled laugh sounds from his chest. “what was the first thing i ever said to you?” he asks, a toothy grin on him even though you can’t see it. you recall the faithful night he slid into your dms while he carries you into his room.

he’d tripped over his words somehow, the fangirling fool. before that, he tweeted to the whole world that he wanted to see you in concert. it was a huge thing, and people were freaking out about it, even more so when your online interactions became routine. that’s nothing compared to where you are now.

you’re currently living with him and basically dating. possibly, in love. the base of it all really is your music.

“that you love me.” you pause for the ellipses. the corners of your lips turn up. “but, you really meant to say my work.” “both apply.” tom passes that off like it’s a side comment, carefully laying you down on his bed. you look up at him with a curious glint in your eyes. “what does that mean?” his cheeks flush, and he bites back the smile that’s growing. this was supposed to go... differently.

you sit up, breathing out a laugh at tom’s boyish behavior. he’s precious, truly. “you do love me?” those three words will change everything if he says yes. he takes both your hands in his and holds them between you two. you meet his doe eyes. “yeah, y/n/n. i do.” so, you were right. “i love you... and, that wasn’t how i planned on saying it.” signaling for him to elaborate, you tilt your head to the side.

tom sits down next to and faces you before continuing. “it was supposed to be romantic, right?” he rolls his eyes up to the ceiling, annoyed he ruined this. “candlelit dinner, flowers, that sort of thing. seems more fitting for the occasion.” you shift closer to him until your knees are touching. your face is lit up, voice dropped to almost a whisper.

“since when do we do things the way we’re supposed to?” you point out and set your hands on his shoulders. “we’ve gone straight from online dating to me moving in. that’s usually not how it works.” tom chuckles lowly. his own hands find their place on your hips. you’re so good with words. then again, you are a singer. “guess you could say we’re, um, spontaneous,” he agrees, fingers drawing circles on you.

you and tom have explored some of each other’s most intimate places, yet you’ve never shared a moment quite like this. it’s like meeting him for the first time again. he’s too tongue tied to spit out what he wants. you somehow know, anyway. what you cherish most about your relationship is that you two completely and totally understand one another, on every level.

“tom?” you speak quietly, butterflies filling up your body. “hm?” he hums back. this is one of those moments where it all just clicks. “i love you. i really, really love you.” you giggle out of the pure happiness that consumes you, tom joining in your laughter. “i love you, too.” he sounds like he’s said it a million times and he’ll say it a million more. he leans over so his forehead rests on yours. “really, really love you.”

your warm breath hits his face, eyes darting from his own to his lips. “i want you to be more than...” you trail off, unsure of how to phrase it. “more than... more than a friend?” tom pokes fun at what you said during the show. there’s less and less space between you with every second. “you mean, like, a boyfriend?”

“exactly. be my boyfriend,” you all but demand. you’re half asleep and desperate to be able to call him yours already. “bossy, bossy, bossy,” tom chastises, swiping his thumb across your bottom lip. how he goes from being shy and giddy to the cockiest person alive in minutes, you’ll never know. “please?” you throw in to sway him. your hand locks with his, slowly moving it off your face.

you run your tongue over your teeth. “at least kiss me.” “you don’t have to ask,” tom breathes, lips now ghosting over yours. “i was going to.” true to his words, he closes the microscopic gap between you, you pushing forward against him as you kiss back. your first kiss in love. his lips taste like the chapstick he always uses, and he moves them softly.

he places a hand on your knee, you opening your mouth so he can have access to it. instead, a yawn exits. tom pulls back with a breathy laugh. “you must be exhausted, yeah? let’s get you to bed.” he pecks your lips once more. “my girl needs her beauty rest.” that confirms your relationship. you scrunch your nose and grin wide. “and, she’s gonna get some with her boy.”

you’re reminded of how sweaty you are when you catch a whiff. “oof, wait. do you think i can take a shower first?” you grimace, fanning at the air for emphasis. tom uses the tip of his nose to nudge yours. “absolutely. need help in there, too?” he’s not asking in that way, only so nothing happens. the hospital wouldn’t be the most pleasant place to spend your break. plus, he doesn’t want to be without you too long.

“you know what? yeah.”

that’s how you end up intertwined under the hot water, letting it cascade down your back as tom hugs you close to him. you sigh in content and tangle your fingers in his fluffed over curls. you’ve learned that he’s super into having his hair played with. it’s endearing, how he instinctively leans into your touch, eyes closing as you tug on the roots.

he drops his head down to kiss your shoulder, dragging his lips to your collarbone in a way that tickles. they land on one of your breasts next. there isn’t anything sexual about it, only loving. just in case he gets too excited because it’s not uncommon he does, you gently put a finger to his lips. tom takes the hint and lets up. you continue combing through his wet hair while you step out of the water.

“do you ever sing in the shower?” he questions, drawing your naked body in closer to his. “sometimes, yeah. i honestly feel like i sound better there,” you admit and slide your hand down to the nape of his neck. tom’s tongue darts out to lick his lips. “not true. you sound beautiful everywhere, and don’t fight me on this one.” he smirks in satisfaction, you groaning at your loss.

“i really enjoy hearing your voice when it blares through an arena, though,” tom keeps buttering you up. you shake your head and settle both arms around his neck. “man, i just love you so much.” “i love you, sweetheart,” he murmurs back, you switching places so he can give his hair a final rinse. you watch him and his glowing body, admiring the sight.

“what a sensation you are,” you say mostly to yourself, which doesn’t stop him from hearing. “i see what you did there.” he eyes you while you do the same to him. your arms still around his neck pull him back to you. “tommy? do you sing in the shower?” you meant to ask him before, then he started throwing all those compliments at you.

tom scoffs, walking you back so you’re against the wall. “i don’t sing anywhere.” “what?” you gasp and put a hand on his chest. “you’re lying, you have to be. wasn’t billy elliot a musical?” he narrows his eyes at you as he tries to gage where you’re going with this. “that i did a decade ago, and way before puberty. couldn’t sing a word without cracking after that.”

your mouth is left hanging open in shock and disappointment. you bet he has a nice voice, and he’s downplaying it. “y/n,” tom begins, cupping your jaw with his palm. “since we’re living together now, there’s a lot you’re going the learn about me. good things, weird things.” he shrugs casually. “this is one of the weird things.”

“only because you make it weird! come on, let me hear you,” you request and wrap a leg around his waist. you’re giving him a hopeful smile. “god, no. you’ll hate it,” he almost laughs, a hand on your thigh. “i’m literally a singer. how could i hate something i love?” you refute, batting your lashes at him. “especially when someone i love is doing it.” “i love you, too. but, i’m not.” he’s quick to shut you down.

“drop a bar!” you try to coax him, which he already has a comeback for. “you first.” “i can’t. my throat is all scratchy from earlier,” you lie. tom presses his lips into a line, feigning pity. “aw, you know what’ll make you feel better? tea. i’ll go get you some.” he turns to shut the water off, so you grab his shoulders. “no, the steam is working. you can stay.”

“love,” tom addresses you in a warning tone that you can’t take seriously. he can’t either, a giggle escaping him. “my voice is shit. ask anyone, and they’ll tell you.” “i won’t believe them,” you hum, pushing back curls sticking to his forehead. “sounds like you just have stage fright. we can work on that, though.” “how?” he tightens his arm around your middle.

“i’ll bring you on for my next show. we’ll do a little duet.” you’re joking, though that would definitely be interesting to see unfold. “uh, never. what happened to you being tired?” tom cleverly deflects and digs his fingers into your side. you look down in defeat. “i forgot about that.” “yeah, yeah. no, seriously. we should really get to sleep, y/n/n.” he’s back to his sweet, attentive self. “‘s been a long night.”

giving in with a nod, you capture his lips in yet another kiss. tom never gets tired of them, and neither do you. you break it after a few seconds, lips lingering on his as they detach. “carry me?” you ask again, not caring how whiny you sound. tom presses a quick kiss to your forehead. “oh, you’re adorable. of course.”

well, you’ve found something to keep you occupied until the next leg of tour. you’re going to discover the many layers your intriguingly unusual boyfriend has.

#tom holland #tom holland fluff #tom holland x y/n #tom holland x you #tom holland x reader #tom holland au #tom holland smut #tom holland imagine #tom holland fic #tom holland fanfiction #tom holland x singer!reader #tom holland request #peter parker #peter parker fluff #peter parker smut #peter parker x reader

469 notes · View notes

sincerelyella · 3 years

Text

My Person (Liam x MC)

Book: The Royal Romance (AU)

Song Inspiration: My Person by Spencer Crandall

Pairings: Liam x MC (Ella) Summary: A one shot of my favorite couple - it’s Liam and Ella’s anniversary and there are big plans in store.

A/N: Okay, I’m gonna be very honest, I am super nervous about posting again. I wrote this maybe last week and kind of finished it earlier today. Thank you to those that I vented to about actually posting my stories, not sure why I feel really sick right now. New blog name (used to be @callmeellabella), new post LOL and I didn’t really know who to tag since it’s been a long time so I’m using my old list. Please let me know if you want off.

A/N2: Participating in @wackydrabbles this week. Prompt will be in bold.

Thank you @alyssalauren and @ofpixelsandscribbles for reading through this for me and kind of handing me that invisible paper bag for me to breathe in. Love y'all!

Warnings: Fluffs. A lot of fluffs.

Words: 1658

Isaiah and Noelle grinned as they filmed their parents in the seat in front of them, holding hands. After 15 years of marriage, Liam and Ella were the epitome of the best partners to each other and parents to their children. There were rough times, of course, you can’t escape those, but the King and Queen handled things in stride.

Noelle’s eyes filled with tears when she watched her dad lift her mom’s hand to his mouth and kiss her knuckles. The way he looked at Ella, like she was the only woman in the world, made Noelle have very high standards for a future partner for herself.

Isaiah grew up knowing how you were supposed to treat a woman, and it was all modeled from how his dad treated his mom. At 15 years old, he grew up in the public eye, but thankfully, his parents allowed him to have a normal childhood. The only time there was mention of royalty was a gala or a ball held at the palace; his Uncle Leo, Max, and Drake as well as his Aunt Olivia and parents all dressed up.

It was their parent’s anniversary that day and Liam had planned a family dinner, just the four of them.

One week ago

“Hey guys,” Liam smiled as he watched his kids sitting at the kitchen island doing homework.

“Hey, dad.” “Hi, daddy.”

Liam hung his keys on the wall by the door and shoved his hands in his pockets. “Next week is mine and your mother’s anniversary.”

Noelle and Isaiah stopped what they were doing and met their father’s gaze.

“I … was hoping you could help me with something,” his brows rounded as he stared at them.

“Sure, what did you need?” Noelle asked.

Isaiah chewed his bottom lip. “No pranks though, right dad?”

Liam chuckled, remembering that anniversary and how it went … so wrong. “No, son. No pranks. Plus, your Uncle Maxwell is not invited until later.”

Present-day

“Guys, we’re here,” Liam turned to Noelle and Isaiah and widened his eyes at them, the two nodding back with small smiles. Ella missed the entire silent exchange as she climbed out of the black SUV after Bastien opened her door.

Everyone piled into the restaurant, all of them laughed and cried as the kids asked for a cake to be presented to their parents to celebrate their special day.

“How beautiful,” Ella wiped her tears away as she gazed at the red velvet bundt cake covered in cream cheese frosting. “Was this your doing?” She turned to her husband as he smiled.

“No, love, that was them,” he gestured towards Noelle and Isaiah.

“Thank you,” she used a tissue to dab at both her eyes.

“Fifteen years is a long time to be married, ma,” Isaiah dimpled as he looked from his mom to his dad. “Now hurry up and eat it so that we can have a piece!”

The family laughed and dug into the cake. An hour later, they slowly stood from the table, grumbling about how full they were.

“Oh God, why didn’t you stop me?” Isaiah smacked his sister in the arm.

Noelle glared at her brother and punched him in the arm. “It’s not my fault you ate like you never saw food before.”

“Why did you say that?” Isaiah whined.

Liam and Ella walked behind their children, smirking at each other.

“They’re so dramatic,” Ella snorted.

“Wonder who they got that from?” Liam arched a brow at his wife.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about, Your Majesty.”

“Love,” Liam waited until she turned to look at him. “I have a surprise for you.”

“Where? What is it?”

“Come on,” he tugged on her hand and led her out of the restaurant and into the waiting SUV.

“Where are we going?”

“Ma, just wait, we’ll get there in a minute,” Noelle giggled in the back seat.

“You guys know too?” Ella looked from her son to her daughter and back again. “Liam?”

“Just relax, love, we’ll be there soon,” he squeezed her hand and laughed as her nose wrinkled in annoyance.

A few minutes later, Bastien turned into a small, private area for vehicles to park. “We’re here,” he said and turned to smirk at Ella. “Your Majesty, we’re going to blindfold you.”

“You’re … what?!”

Isaiah cackled as he leaned forward to wrap a scarf around his mother’s eyes.

“That’s blocking my nose,” Ella complained. “I can’t breathe.”

“You can breathe out of your mouth.”

“Isaiah Alexander,” she said sternly and he jumped.

“Sorry mom,” he mumbled as he fixed the scarf so it only covered her eyes.

“Okay,” Liam opened the door to her side of the SUV. “Come on, love, I’m carrying you to our destination.”

Ella let out a long sigh and reached up to feel her husband’s neck. She allowed him to carry her bridal style to … wherever they were going. When her family got like this it was usually because of her husband, who loved to take her places to surprise her. She didn’t mind, honestly, but it was annoying when everyone was in on it except for her.

“We’re almost there, love, I promise,” she felt Liam kiss the top of her head and she snuggled into his shoulder.

“Hey, I got a picture from Uncle Max!” Noelle opened the message and gasped.

Isaiah reached for his sister’s phone. “Is it another picture of him and his peacock Lady and the Tramping some spaghetti?”

Everyone began to laugh.

“I can’t believe that damn thing didn’t peck his eye out,” Ella snorted.

“That thing still scares the crap out of me,” Noelle said as her fingers flew over the keys.

“We’re here,” Liam smiled as he began to step down onto the large rocks towards the private beach.

“Don’t drop me, Liam,” Ella said as she lifted her nose to the air. “I smell the ocean.” She felt her husband lower her to the ground. “What now? I’m still wearing this.”

A moment of silence and some giggling in the distance made Ella furrow her brows.

“Okay, take off the scarf, love.”

Ella quickly undid the knot and opened her eyes; she faced the ocean. “Liam, what-”

“Turn around.”

As she did, she saw her husband on one knee, her children behind him in the distance carrying an old 1989 boombox, the song My Person by Spencer Crandall playing.

I was lookin' for a long time

I never found nobody like you

I got your name, got your number

And we talked 'til they turned on the lights

“A boombox?”

Liam smirked. “You made me watch Sixteen Candles.”

“Oh yeah,” she chuckled. “Liam,” Ella had tears streaming down her face and she wiped them away quickly. “Wh-what is this?”

He took hold of her free hand and ran his thumb over her knuckles. “Love, it’s our fifteenth wedding anniversary. We married that long ago.”

She nodded, the lump on her throat making it difficult for her to speak.

“But we were together before that,” he smiled up at her. “I met you and I was done for, I haven't looked at anyone else since. You came to my social season, I chose you, we were engaged for a year, and then here we are.”

My person

My heartbeat

My slow dance

My Sunday-morning-sippin'-on-coffee in bed

My know-when-you-know best friend

“You’re my person,” Liam bit his bottom lip to control his emotions. “You and the kids are my everything, and you know I’d give all this up for you if you asked.”

“We don’t want that though!” Noelle yelled and they all laughed.

“Ella Brooks Rys, I wanted to ask you if you would remarry me,” he reached into his pocket, pulled out a black velvet box, and opened it. “Renew our vows and our commitment to each other.”

The box held three rings, an emerald-shaped, 6-carat diamond solitaire in the middle, and one plain platinum band on each side of it. One was engraved with Isaiah Alexander and the other with Noelle Marie.

“Of course,” Ella choked out as Liam smiled and the kids jumped up and down.

My saving grace, my everything

I’ve never been more sure that you’re my person

Every minute is a long time

If I ain’t holding on to you

Liam pushed all three rings onto her finger. “You ready, Mrs. Rys?”

“I am, Mr. Rys,” she pulled her husband to her and captured his lips in a passionate kiss.

“Ew, gross!” “Stop! This is not part of the plan!”

“Congratulations!”

Ella was surprised by that last one and turned towards the sound. All of their friends and family were there on the beach, smiling at them.

“What are-”

“You guys are renewing your vows!” Leo hollered and lifted a bottle of champagne in the air. “Let’s get this going so we can get druuuunk!”

“Leo!” Liam snapped at his brother.

“I mean, I’m ready when you are.”

Hana and Olivia rushed towards Ella and hugged her. “Were you surprised?”

“I was,” Ella sniffled. “You guys all knew?”

“Yup!”

“My little blossom! You are so beautiful! Let me see the rings!”

Ella gave Max her left hand.

“Whatever you do, don’t let Beaumont touch it. I’m sure he’s got lasagna all under his fingernails,” Drake chuckled as he approached the group.

“Hey marshmallow,” Ella turned to hug him. “And you guys had lasagna without me?”

Liam laughed and put an arm around Noelle and Isaiah. “You guys ready?”

They both nodded.

“I’m ready to marry your mother again,” they all laughed as Ella put her arm around Isaiah. “Let’s go!”

My saving grace, my everything

I've never been more sure that you're my person

Yeah, baby, you're my person

#My Person #Liam x MC #Liam x Ella #the royal romance #the royal romance fandom #the royal romance fanfic #the royal romance fanfiction #trr au #the royal romance au #trr fandom #trr fanfic #trr fanfiction #Sincerely Ella #Ella still writes #Liam Rys #King Liam

119 notes · View notes

manonblaqkbeak · 3 years

Text

Lock-down Kisses

i wasnt almost gonna do day 11 but i got inspired late last night.

im also so glad that you guys liked my fic yesterday, it has been a bit of a stressful week for me so it makes me happy when you guys like my fics! it really means a lot so thank u! :)

cw: none. just some usual fluff lol

1.4k words

enjoy!

Aelin was so damned bored. She was sure she'd never been this bored in all her life.

She had to tell herself constantly that she was lucky, that she had a roof over her head, food in the fridge and pantry and that she was healthy and walking around, that she still had her job, no matter how rocky it currently was, she was still lucky.

It still didn't change the fact that being in lock-down rutting sucked.

It had been a month since the hard lock-down started and she had been stuck at home—her beautiful, sturdy home that she was damned privileged to have—somewhere in-between the mood of wanting to do something but not having the energy to actually do it.

She had already vacuumed and put the clean dishes away and the dirty dishes in the dishwasher. She had done a fresh load of laundry and put it outside to dry. With nothing left other than mopping (which she hated because no matter how hard she cleaned the tiles beforehand, there was always little pieces of debris that showed up and annoyed her to no end), she couldn't really think of any other house-chores for her to do to keep her preoccupied.

She mowed yesterday, and had racked up the leaves and grass too, plopping them in the garden bin. She watered the garden and refilled the bird-bath, as well.

There were plenty of books to read and listen to, but Aelin just wasn't in the mood for that, which surprised Rowan when she said that yesterday when she complained for the umpteenth time that she was slowly going insane—Aelin was always in the mood to read, but now...maybe it was because the people in those books were having adventures while she was stuck inside.

Right now, she was lying on the couch, staring at her plain as dust ceiling, wondering if it would break protocol if she could pay her neighbour Feyre to paint something enticing.

It probably would be, but she needed something pretty to stare at if she wasn't reading or watching television.

Again, she was grateful, because she had books to read and television to watch, but Aelin always liked to be doing something, being outside and running errands and working.

She was a teacher at Orynth dance and music studio, and due to the lock-down, she was unable to teach dance, but thankfully, she was still able to conduct piano, guitar and violin lessons over Zoom, even if it wasn't really the same and her laptops speaker made the music sound a little dingy, but she didn't have any lessons this week, but would next week, so at least she had something to look forward to.

To pass the time, she had resorted to snooping, watching people mill about in the street from the safety of her enclosed verandah and telling Rowan of the details that she observed when he had a moment of free time.

Which was practically non-existent, thanks to being a teacher and having to deal with stressed out senior students who constantly needed to be reassured that everything was going to be okay.

Not that Aelin could blame them for their stress, she felt so damned sorry for those kids, hyperventilating because they couldn't concentrate at home because they had to share the office with others and how terrified they were of flunking and just about everything else that caused them stress. But Rowan was there, reassuring them that everything would be okay and that as a team, they would tackle everything one day at a time.

Which was why when Aelin went to give Rowan a fresh cup of coffee earlier she was surprised to see that her husband was not in the study and that the room was empty. His laptop and papers were all set up for another day of virtual learning, but her husband could not be found, and she had gone throughout their entire house looking for him and did not find him. And it wasn't like he was hard to spot, he was over six feet tall, tanned and had silver rutting hair, but he was nowhere.

When she had gone back to the kitchen to add sugar and cream to his coffee that was now hers, she noticed that his joggers were gone by the front door, which made her frown because he hadn't mentioned going for a walk—not like he had to tell her everything she did, but she wouldn't have minded joining him—and came to the decision that maybe he just needed to clear his head before another stressful day was upon him.

At least it was Friday, not that that really meant anything when one was a teacher.

Aelin glanced around her living room, she had rearranged it two Saturdays ago with Rowan's help and maybe wondered if she could re-arrange it again, but decided that would just be ridiculous.

Maybe yoga would be a good idea, she didn't mind it and it at least gave her mind something else to focus about other than viruses and death and all other manners of unpleasantness.

So deciding that yoga was the best thing to prevent her from going to the roof and swapping out the tiles, Aelin got dressed, grabbed her things and went outside.

X X X X X X

Two hours later and Aelin was still outside. However, she gave up on yoga an hour ago, finding the energy to listen to a deliciously smutty audio-book. She was watching the clouds, but her mind was imaging that what was happening between the two lovers was her and Rowan (something that happened often when it came to these stories) and was about one paragraph from either shoving her hand down her pants or calling Rowan and asking him when the hell he was coming home so that they could recreate the scene when the front door opened.

Aelin jumped up and went back inside, barely remembering to turn off the audio-book and have her way with Rowan on the floor when she stopped dead at the sight of him.

Because in his hands hand was a leash, that was attached to a dog. A yellow lab, to be exact. The dog looked to be about six months old and was the cutest thing she'd ever seen.

“Rowan, why do you have a dog?”

“She's ours,” he said, like it was the most normal thing in the world. “I was supposed to pick her up from the shelter over a month ago, but she got sick, so I was told to wait until she recovered. She's okay now, perfectly healthy, so I finally got the call the other day that she was ready to be picked up. She's caught up on all the necessary vaccines, and is well trained. I was meant to be here earlier, but Fleetfoot here wanted to go swimming in a mud puddle, so I had to take her to a dog spa on the other side of town.”

Aelin nodded, her eyes still glued on the pup. Her eyes were a pretty golden-brown colour and while she was young, Aelin could tell that she was smart.

“You got us a puppy?” Aelin managed to ask.

“Yeah. I know you've been wanting one for a long time, and when I saw her pop up on my Facebook wall, I knew she was the one for us. Do you like her?” he asked and Aelin could have sworn that her burly husband sounded shy. Nervous.

“I love her,” Aelin admitted truthfully and finally went over to their dog, who immediately starting sniffing at Aelin's outstretched hand when she crouched down in front of her. And was soon being supplied with kisses, all over her hand, her face and neck. Aelin laughed and Rowan smiled, knowing that he had made the right decision.

Rowan was about to sit down himself when Aelin tugged at his hand, bringing him down on top of her and kissed him with every bit of love she felt for him.

It didn't take long for Fleetfoot to join them, licking at Rowan while she yipped for their attention. They broke apart and spent the rest of the day getting to know the new addition of their family.

Lock-down sucked, but Aelin was lucky indeed to have her husband in her life. And the pure ball of energy that was Fleetfoot.

#rowaelin #rowaelinmonth #my work

68 notes · View notes

jinkicake · 2 years

Note

DHDGDHDHD ABSOLUTELY THEY BETTER BE PRAYING TO DIAVOLO I DONT FIND THEM BC CAN YOU IMAGINE THE WHOLE CAST SWEATING BULLETS BC MC IS LOOKING FOR THEM😭😭 they obviously sacrifice beel first bc he works out and this has the most stamina,,,,, nah they come back from a long day at rad and he is in a coma. Mammon goes after bc they can use that time to devise a plan. He keeps up that sim thing for about 3 rounds before mc is like “ since you can’t move I’ll just use you” poor boy is delirious at that point. He can’t even think about anything. But also he’s feeding off your greed so he can go a little bit longer than the rest. Solomon stupid ass thinks he can undo whatever has happened but rip magic man he gets tied up and can’t do anything but take it🥰🥰 mc don’t forget all the times he’s been mean so he’s full on sobbing begging for mc to slow down promising he’ll be a good boy lmao. Simon is delighted. Like that sick sense of satisfaction that you’re begging for him gets him going and tbh I think he keeps up the best right next to dia and Barbatos. He’s taking it like a champ just smiling through how overstimulated he is trying to wear you out but the way you’re squeezing him and how sloppy you’ve made him- 😤🧑🏿‍🦽🧑🏿‍🦽 when he’s recovered he will get his revenge. Satan is the first to fold like a lawn chair like at least Levi can try and hold back satan is full on cat boy meowing for you to fuck him. Belphegor you use the pact mark for bc he’s falling asleep so you command him not to cum and it’s been like that for hours- he’s grabbing onto everything he can like beel is scared to help him at this point and when he dies get to cum is so much and he is out like a light for the next week. Asmo takes it in stores but after like,,,, 6 hours he’s like damn I need some water hold up but you’re not stopping and he’s like “ gotta hand over my title to mc now bc fuck” Barbatos is secretly nervous bc he’s like “I have been expecting you.” And he does kinda take the wind out of your sails but you just gotta pull his hat and he’s your bitch. Like look at him!! Ain’t no way he don’t got a hair pulling kink!! I can tell! Diavolo told me so😤😤. But really he’s only stalling for dia and when you finally get to him he makes you ride him on his throne and bends you over almost every surface imaginable in the palace like he makes your entire body sore asf and excuses you from rad for the week bc whatever is going on has finally worn off and you feel like you ran 7 marathons at once……. ANYWAY ALL OF THAT TO SAY I WANT TO WRECK THESE BOYSSHSJSJDJ I didn’t even think about the newbies…. Just want to say mephistopheles would fold like laundry too. Wants to last as long as Lucifer and only makes it to the halfway point before you drain him dry smh

LOLLLL SAD BEEL AND MAMMON BEING SACRIFICED FIRST. Mammon def thinks he is doing something with his turn and truly believes that he can withstand mc since he is their first (who is going to tell him??)!!!! Those two followed by Solomon and Simeon?! This rotation circle is already perfect LMAO let me say that I think that if anyone will be able to stop mc or slow them down it will be barbatos... idk why and i can't explain it but it's just a feeling LOL

SATAN BEING THE FIRST TO FOLD PLSSSSS he's patiently waiting his turn by pacing his room and tapping his foot.... like satan wants his mc time now and hes gonna get it raw! AHHHHH THAT DIAVOLO EXPLANATION HAS ME ON THE FLOOOOORRRRR EEEK HES SO HOT HAAH i also agree that mephistopheles will fold like a damn lawn chair. mc says hi to him and he's already walking toward their room ready for his turn.... there's so much I could say about luci but my mind is blank wait for me to come back to that one LOLLLL

also.... you're one of the smartest people ive ever met, have i told you that?! like i have no idea where i would be without these obey me discussions </3

#sarahandoikawatalkshit

11 notes · View notes

newtonsheffield · 3 years

Note

Hiii i absolutely loved the epilogue, sooo cute and funny and the ending 🥺 but now i have this teeny tiny question if you don't mind how do you imagine the night of the Formal if Katie had actually gone with someone else? like I just know jealous baby Anthony will be so funny, sorry i know that would be like an au of an au of an au (lol) but i just loooove fics with dances because i don't get any of those where i am from

I'm so glad you enjoyed the epilogue of A Letter That You Never Read! I really had no idea when I posted that story that people would like it quite so much but... I guess you guys did?

Anyway I would be more than happy to share with you a tiny taste of Jealous teenage Anthony, quietly brooding away in the corner. @missfairygodmother was also interested in seeing Baby Anthony get a little green eyed over Kate

In this AU of an AU of an AU

Anthony had been nervous all afternoon, well, for weeks, months actually, as he'd tried to pluck up the courage to ask Katie Sheffield if she would go to the formal with him. But every time he'd been around her, he just couldn't choke out the words. She always seemed so far above them all, distancing herself from the mundanity of teenage life, sitting in the corner of the cafeteria quietly reading a book while idiots hit each other with the dinner trays around her, her eyes rolling slightly as she walked past them. So he hadn't done it.

But he'd found himself considering what she would like, when he picked out his suit. Her backpack was green, was that her favourite colour? Would she like it if he wore a tie that colour? What flowers would she like to see on his buttonhole? Roses? or tulips or peonies or something else completely?

"Why don't you ask Katie to go with you?" His mother had said gently as they'd stood in the store and the woman taking his measurements had asked what his partner was wearing. "She doesn't want to go with me, Mum." He'd mumbled, more than a little embarrassed, deeply regretting the incidents that had caused her to become aware of his futile crush. "Did you ask her?" He shook his head "She barely says anything to me, Mum. She doesn't like me back." And his cheeks had burned with shame His mother had sighed, "I don't suppose it's occurred to you that she might also be too nervous to say anything?" And while Anthony had scoffed, he'd desperately hoped that she was right, even though he knew the very last word that would ever be used to describe Katie Sheffield was nervous.

Be'd told himself, as he got ready, that when he got there, and he saw her, he'd ask her to dance. He would, he would find the courage somehow. And he would tell her that his heart wanted to beat out of his chest whenever he saw her, that he thought she was beautiful and smart, and funny and he wanted to know her. He'd arrived and loitered nervously in the corner of the school gymnasium and then he saw her, and his heart felt like it had been ripped out of his chest.

Kate had walked in, heartbreakingly beautiful, her hair cascading down her back like a waterfall, just like always, her glasses abandoned for the night, which made Anthony frown a little, but that wasn't why his heart broke. No, she was arm in arm with someone else. She paused at the doorway, listening to something her annoyingly handsome and square jawed partner said, her face breaking into a wide smile as he finished. Anthony felt something white hot rip through his chest seething at the back of the other boy's head as they walked further into the room.

Whoever he was, Anthony had never seen him before, but he looked older, a little more mature, and Anthony hated him. Petulantly despised him, almost as much as he despised himself for not asking her. She already has a boyfriend you idiot, of course she does, because you're a fuckwit and she's incredible.

He stood stock still in the corner jealousy tearing through him for god knows how long, wincing as he saw her boyfriend smile down at her, his fingers lightly brushing the flowers at her wrist. Roses Anthony noted, despising the pink tulips currently on his buttonhole. "You could have just asked her yourself you know. She's here with him because he actually asked her." Simon's voice said gently, as he followed Anthony's line of vision as Katie's boyfriend laughed. "Fuck Off Si." Anthony spat out, hating the truth of it, unable to stand in the room another minute he swept outside ignoring her completely as he past, leaning against the side of the building his chest aching.

"Anthony? Are you okay?" Of course she was here. Standing just a few feet away from him, the green of her dress shining in the soft lighting, an Amy Shark song, Adore playing in the background he realised a little belatedly because of course it was. "Yeah, fine. Why wouldn't I be?" He said, ignoring the lump in his throat. "Are you having a good time? Your boyfriend seems nice." Her brow furrowed just a little, her lower lip caught between her teeth. "You just looked kind of upset." Her voice was so soft, her eyes so concerned that right here, in this moment, it was so easy for him to pretend that she felt the same way he did. But she didn't. "Freddie's nice, we always have a good time together." Katie and Freddie. They even had matching names, his stomach churned while his chest burned with jealousy, and he instantly felt sick because he was making this so much about himself, when he should have been glad to see her happy.

Anthony nodded. "You look really nice tonight, Katie." He couldn't help himself. Her eyes widened for a second before she smiled. "Thanks, it's amazing what happens when a girl takes off her glasses right?" "It doesn't have anything to do with that." Anthony said sharply, his eyes catching hers. Surely she knew how beautiful she was. Silence echoed between them for several moments before "Katie?" A male voice called out softly, Freddie appearing seconds later. Katie smiled at him when he arrived, and Anthony's stomach churned again. He wondered for one wild moment, what it would have been like if she never came, if he never came, then he could have gone on pretending he had a chance forever.

"Sorry, Mate, I don't think we've been introduced, Freddie." He said turning towards Anthony, his hand outstretched. Anthony stared down at it for a second and then gritted his teeth. "Freddie this is Anthony." Katie said lightly and Freddie did the oddest thing, his eyes widened, a smirk on his face as he looked between them. "Anthony, I'm so glad to meet you!" He said, suddenly overflowing with happiness. Anthony felt his brow furrow as Katie ducked her head embarrassed. "Mate, I wonder if you could do me a favour, I hurt my leg at Rugby this week." Of course he's a rugby player, Anthony thought savagely. "And I think someone ought to dance with Katie." Anthony's heart stopped. Katie looked nothing short of aghast. "Freddie!" She hissed angrily, nudging him "Anthony, you don't have to,- I'm not- Freddie I'm telling my Mum on you!" Anthony's brow furrowed again, he was missing something here, something he couldn't quite place but he wasn't going to miss the opportunity. He cut across Freddie's "Please, Auntie's not going to do-" "I want to dance with you!" Katie's head nearly shot off her shoulders as it swivelled towards him. Anthony felt his hand ruffle his hair nervously, cursing himself. "If you want to... dance with me that is." He couldn't breathe as her eyes flicked over his face, more than a little guarded until she said.

"Okay. I'd like that." Anthony felt his face break into a bright smile, his heart pounding in his chest as he tugged her back though the doors, leading her to the dance floor, his heart pounding as she wrapped her arms a little awkwardly around him, standing so lose he could count the tiny line of freckles on her nose. Content silence between them as the music swelled in the background. And then everything came slipping from his chest. She was so close he just couldn't help it.

"I really wanted to ask you to come tonight. And I'm sorry, I know it's not fair because you're with Freddie, but I've liked you for a really long time and I can't let you go away to University thinking don't care about you." He was breathing a little heavily by the end of his speech, the warring emotions that had been playing on him all night finally getting the better of him as Katie stared at him, dumbstruck. Anthony let his hands drop. "And now i've made you uncomfortable, I'm really sorry. Sorry." God he had to get out of here, tears were pushing at the back of his throat, clouding his vision, and then her hand caught his. "Freddie is my cousin!" She said, all in a rush, "Well, my step mum's second cousin's son. But I had to bring him because I didn't have anyone else and I was too nervous to come by myself but I really wanted to see you one last time and-" Anthony couldn't help himself, his heart was beating out of his chest as he leaned towards her, cutting off whatever she'd been about to say with his lips on hers.

Her lips were soft against his, unmoving for a moment, before her hands tugged him more tightly against her, her fingers playing with the hair at the back of his neck. There was a small smilie on her lips when Anthony pulled back, a broad grin on his own. " I've wanted to do that for a really long time." "Was it worth the wait do you think?" "Abso-fucking-lutely." Their lips met again with a small giggle, and even though Anthony had just said the most embarrassing thing he possibly could have said after kissing a girl, he really couldn't bring himself to care.

#a letter that you never read #aus on aus on aus #teenage! kathony #anthony is a jealous little bean #kathony #anthony x kate #anthony bridgerton #kate sheffield #kate sharma #molly's asks and answers

73 notes · View notes

shorkbrian · 4 years

Text

Mirrors

Prelude - Haha Hi I've never done anything quite like this or this long (like 5k bich) but I am THORSTy and I’ve been sitting on these asks for so long I’m so sorry. ALSO to the ppl sending me the sweet gentle asks about my blog guess what??? I would D I E for you legit I read one of them this morning I almost teared up. I haven’t cried (Except for like (TW) s*ui*ide cry lol those don’t count) since like??? last year?? no joke.

ANYWHO idk how to write a praise kink so I went with like, insecurity? but then Kiribaku likes makes the reader just melt cause they keep praising her and they bring it out during nasty times and she's GONE yeeted off the earth it makes her so hot and wet lol.

Pairing - Kiribaku X Reader

Prompt -

Warnings - NSFW!!!! Dirty talk, my best effort at a praise kink, mirror stuff, ummmm mentions of kidnapping. DUB-CON big time, maybe technically even noncon cause reader DOES NOT want it but has just. resigned herself to being a plaything.

Music - https://youtu.be/STO4-8vkG0U

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“What the fuck did you just say?”

You couldn’t meet Bakugou’s eyes. HIs gaze was so intense, eyes so passionate and fierce. You were so embarrassed, aware of Kirishima’s gaze fixed on your form from where he was seated in the armchair.

“I-I…….. don’t like it…. when you talk like that….”

“Fuckin’ what?” Bakugou barked, his brows knitting in confusion.

“What do you mean, baby?” Kiri stood, moving to sit next to Bakugou on the couch so he could see your face.

You wiggled around uncomfortably in your spot on the floor, where you were kneeling between Bakugou’s feet. Kirishima had made some comment, something about how pretty you looked being so sweet for Bakugou. You were literally just sitting there, but Kiri thought you worthy of praise

“It’s not true…… I’m not-my body doesn’t look nice and I just….. every time you guys say stuff about me, all I can think of is how bad I look.” It was hard to choke out the words, your face flushing red as your eyes filled with tears. You were so embarrassed, having to explain your insecurities to your kidnappers. It was bad enough that they dressed you up in slinky outfits, booty shorts and thin shirts that were almost see-through. You hated it, hated the way it made you feel, hated the way it made you look. It was humiliating.

“Well that’s a bunch of bullshit. I don’t go around saying shit unless it’s true.” Bakugou glared down at you. He seemed angry that you would even have that view of yourself, the foot resting on the floor by your hip beginning to tap in agitation.

Kirishima scooted closer so he could reach you, his hand coming up to stroke your hair. “We mean what we say. You’re beautiful, such a good, obedient little girl for us.”

“No, no - please don’t say that kind of stuff!” You were getting worked up now, tears falling freely as you hugged your arms around your body. Kirishima shared a look with Bakugou, the two men quickly deciding to drop the conversation and move on to something else.

“Tch, whatever. C’mere” Bakugou patted his leg, prompting you to shuffle out of your kneeling position and onto his lap. You would rather not, but you knew what resistance would result in, and you’d prefer not having to nurse a sore bottom and mild burns for the next few days. Bakugou wrapped an arm loosely around your waist, tugging you closer to him on his lap. Kiri still petted your hair, pressed up against the blond man’s side as he smiled at you.

“It’s fine baby, calm down. Maybe one day you’ll see what we see.” Without leaving any room for you to argue, Kirishima planted a quick smooch on your forehead before rising from the couch. “Do you two have any preferences for dinner? I was thinking we could order something from that yakisoba place, remember Bakugou? The one Mina recommended.”

“Yeah, go for it. They have any spicy shit?”

Tuning them out, you swiped at your tears, trying to reel yourself back into a steady emotional state. You feel so weak these days, both physically and emotionally. Being held captive by the two men had worn you down, made you prone to teary outbursts. You held no control - your daily routine dictated by the men from the first day they had snatched you from your home. You were reluctant to obey, had even fought them at first, but you quickly realized it was easier (and less painful) to just do what they wanted.

Fighting was useless.

——

Weeks had passed since your little outburst. Unfortunately, Bakugou and Kirishima weren’t willing to give up praising you every chance they got. You had an inkling suspicion that they had upped the amount of comments they made about you ever since that day, enjoying watching you squirm and your face go bright red. It made you blush, yes. Made your heart beat a little faster, made you flounder for words if you were in the middle of speaking. But you just felt….. shame when they praised you.

They lauded you for your obedience, how compliant you were for them. Kiri would ask you to sit down and wait at the table while he answered the door (“don’t make a sound baby.”), and you did. Bakugou would have you sit in his lap while playing video games, and you tried you’re best not to squirm. It made you almost feel sick inside, how quickly you had adjusted to being their “good girl”. You just wanted to please, didn’t want them angry at you.

What really made you blush was when they would strip you down, bend you over the nearest surface. They’d be fucking into you, fondling your body while whispering compliments in-between kisses. You never felt “beautiful” nor “delicious”, no matter how many times they told you otherwise. It was especially humiliating when one of them would take you on the bed, the other watching. You always wanted to hide, shield away your body from their prying eyes, but they never let you.

You just didn’t get it, didn’t understand what they saw when they looked at you. Staring into the bathroom mirror, all you saw were your imperfections, your insecurities. It was shameful, pathetic. You felt entirely unworthy of the attention and love you were being showered with.

——

The boys had seemed more… energetic today, Kirishima almost seeming to bounce with each step, Bakugou smiling gently at you. It made you nervous. It made you even more nervous when Bakugou took his leave, giving both you and Kirishima a quick peck on the lips before going out the door. It was a weekend, and you knew that both men didn’t have work today. You tried asking Kirishima where Bakugou was going, but all you got out of him was a laugh and “Don’t worry about it! He’s gonna do a little bit of shopping.”

Well, at least that eased your mind a tiny bit.

You didn’t have much time to dwell on it though, Kirishima herding you into the basement. It was the their home gym, filled with weights and machines that kept the two men strong and fit, and you weren’t usually allowed down there. If you were, it was because both of the men were present, and they could watch you while they worked out (you knew that they liked showing off for you, even if they didn’t admit it.).

But today Kiri wasn’t going down there to work out. Once the two of you made it down the steps, Kiri was pulling an exercise bench over, instructing you to lay down on it, belly up. You did what he said.

“‘Kay, I’m gonna go upstairs to get some stuff. I want your shorts off by the time I get back, alright baby?”

You nodded.

Sighing, you shimmied your shorts down as he left. You never had to worry about underwear - they never let you wear it unless you were on your period. You knew vaguely what direction this was going in, and had already resigned yourself to getting fucked silly by the redhead. It was practically useless trying to resist.

When he came back, you were surprised. He had rope and…… a Hitachi. That was new. In the short time you’d been living with them, you had gotten used to their habits when they fucked you. Neither man was too interested in toys, preferring to stimulate you manually, so this was an unwelcome surprise.

“Mmhm, you look so sexy baby.” Kiri kneeled down next to you, before peeling apart your thighs. He grinned at you, shark teeth flashing, before snatching up the Hitachi wand, pressing it directly against your pussy. You didn’t like where this is going.

He didn’t turn it on, instead reaching for the rope that he had brought down. The redhead began wrapping it around your thighs, lifting your legs to encircle them with the rope. It took a few minutes, which were tense, silent as you watched him work. He made sure to also circle the rope around your hands and torso, anchoring your arms by your side. When Kiri was finished, you were trapped, unable to move your legs, to even simply part them an inch. The Hitachi wand was still directly on your pussy, snug and unmoving. It rubbed against your clit, making you bite your lip at the delicious friction. Kirishima gave you a flashy smile, turning to ruffle your hair. Distantly you noticed he didn’t have a shirt on.

“Alright babe, we’re gonna have some fun while we wait for Katsuki. You know what this is?” He tapped the wand nestled between your legs.

“It’s…. It’s a vibrator.” You managed, throat suddenly dry.

Kirishima seemed to beam even brighter. “Yeah! I’m gonna turn it on, let you have your fun. But you gotta tell me before you cum, okay? Think you can do that?”

A quick nod from you and the vibrator buzzed to life between your legs, Kirishima not in the mood to dawdle. Your back arched off the bench at the sensation, the pleasure quick and intense. Kirishima stayed kneeling beside you, watching you writhe as he changed the speed of the wand.

It didn’t take long for you to cry out, “Kirishima, I’m gonna cum, I’m gonna cum!”, a thin sheen of sweat covering your body. It made your shirt stick to your chest, accentuate the heaving of your breasts as panted. Right before you orgasmed though, Kiri flipped the off switch, the vibrations cutting off and leaving you hanging. Your eyes shot open, confusion furrowing you’re brow.

“Wha-Kiri? What?”

The redhead smirked, pressing a hand to your tummy to prevent you from moving against the wand, desperate for more stimulation, desperate to orgasm.

“Not yet baby, not yet.”

He patted your stomach soothingly as you stared up at him in confusion. You had been so close! Why have you tell him when you’re going to cum, only to rip that away from you??

A minute passed, then two, Kirishima still rubbing his big hand across your tummy. It was meant to be soothing, a soft gesture, but it only heated your skin, made pleasure thrum in your veins. When you had sufficiently calmed down, chest no longer heaving, Kiri reached down and flicked the wand back on, chuckling at the way you desperately ground against the rounded head of the toy.

“Mm, desperate little baby, aren’t you?” He was kissing your neck, letting his tongue slip out to lick at the skin there. It set you on fire. Reaching the high of orgasm came even quicker this time, spurred on by your movements and determination to cum. If you didn’t tell Kirishima when you were about to, he wouldn’t be able to stop you. So you stayed silent, circling your hips as best you could, leaning into the hot kisses being pressed to your throat.

All of a sudden, the vibrator clicked off, Kirishima’s hand on your tummy once again.

“Thought you could get away with that one? You’re so cute.”

You felt like screaming, yelling out your frustration. He knew your body too well, could feel the hitch in your breath as you prepared to orgasm, felt your fingers tighten, clenching around nothing. He had stopped the vibrator right as you were beginning to feel it, the wave of pleasure. It was frustrating.

You could hardly believe you were thinking this, but you couldn’t wait for Bakugou to get back.

——

It was torture, having your orgasm slip away from you time after time. Kirishima was having fun, groping your chest, leaving sloppy kisses along your neck and collarbone. He liked seeing you struggle, almost at the point of begging and pleading with him in your need to cum.

He had been edging you for a while now, you didn’t even know how many orgasms he had yanked you away from. Kiri had just stopped you once more, turning the vibrator off and holding you still /right/ as you felt yourself letting go. You wanted to scream, on the verge of tears. But then Kirishima was glancing at his phone, stuffing it in his pocket before standing so he could untie you from the bench.

“Bakugou’s back, we’re gonna go see what he brought home for us!”

You could barely think straight, wincing when Kiri removed the vibrator pressing up against your pussy. You were drenched, pussy wet and red and puffy, your own slick covering your thighs. Kirishima helped you to your feet, guiding you into your shorts. You were too out of it to do much, simply letting the man guide and push and lift your body as he pleased. When he pressed up against you to pull your shorts snug over your hips, you felt his bulge through his shorts, poking you in the stomach. You suppose he’d been waiting for relief too, just the same as you.

Kirishima helped you totter up the basement stairs, then guided you towards the bedroom, hand on your waist. You stumbled through the door, eyes immediately focusing on the giant mirror leaned up against the wall. How had Bakugou even gotten it through the door?

“Damn Kiri, you’re really worked up.”

Bakugou was sitting on the bed, unlacing his shoes. Kirishima chuckled, hand leaving your waist so he could go sit beside the blonde.

“Me and her both man. Had to hold myself back, she was making such raunchy sounds.”

Their attention turned to you, both men smirking as they eyed you, Kirishima still with a prominent tent in his shorts.

“Yeah, I fuckin’ bet.” Bakugou smirked.

Kirishima stood, stepping languidly around you until he was at your back, broad chest pressing up against you.

“I mean, look at this -“ a hand cupped your mound, making you jump. You were still sensitive from being denied so many times, even the slightest touch had you twitching. “ - she’s fucking dripping.”

It was true, the crotch of your shorts soaked with your juices. Kiri rubbed his index finger against the seam, pressing it up and against your clit. You shuddered, hand flying up at grasp onto his arm. It felt so good, you hated his touch, didn’t want his hands on you, but oh, your body liked it.

Kirishima pushed you forward, fingers still teasing you through your wet shorts. You gasped when you were pushed face first into the bed, bent at the waist. A hot, blunt hardness rubbed up against you, Kiri’s hand still cupping your mound.

“You’re being such a good little bitch, letting us do whatever the fuck we want to your stupid little cunt.”

You lifted your eyes, saw Bakugou smirking down at you as you were rocked gently by the force of Kiri’s humping. The blond was palming himself over his jeans, but your attention was quickly shifted when you felt your shorts getting ripped down, off your body.

“Step out.” You obeyed. Kirishima was hungry, lustful - voice deeper and serious now - no trace of his signature lightheartedness. He always got like this this when he was excited. Your head was wrenched to the side, cheek mashed against the bedspread, large hand pressing and holding you in place. Belatedly, you recognized you were facing the mirror leaned against the wall, could see Kirishima’s bulk behind you, his shorts already pulled down to reveal his hard cock. If you hadn’t taken it before, you would be scared. He was thick, blunt and girthy - not to mention a considerable length. The tip was flushed red, almost purple, shiny with leaked precum and almost swollen.

“Look at yourself in the mirror baby, you see that? How nice you look, all obedient and ready to take my cock? Such a good, sweet little girl.”

You looked so tiny compared to the redhead, the man having to bend his knees slightly to rub the head of his cock against your pussy. You tried not to moan when he focused it on your clit, rubbing it rapidly over the nub. “Kiri - please……Aah! Let me - lemme cum..” You whined.

“God, you’re so perfect, you know that?” He breathed out a laugh, still rubbing the head of his blunt cock over your clit, hand still forcing your head to the side, making you watch his movements. You almost wanted to cry - being teased and denied for so long. You just wanted to cum, wanted to get this over quickly so you could go shower.

Normally seeing yourself in a mirror was something you’d try to avoid, not favoring the way you looked. But now, you were mesmerized, watching through the reflection the way Kirishima’s red cock pulsed as he finally, finally slipped it into your opening. You choked on a moan as he slowly stretched you out, feeding inch after inch of his wide cock into you. In the mirror, you saw him tip his head back, groaning low in his throat when he finally bottomed out, fat balls pressed flush against you.

“Fuck, oh god, feels so good. You’re so good, can feel your pretty little pussy trying to milk me.” He leaned down, warm chest plastered across your back as he whispered in your ear.

“You really want this, don’t you? Such a gorgeous baby, so sexy and hot and perfect.”

The man didn’t start out slowly, he never did. He was aggressive, unrelenting as he thrust his fat cock into you over and over. Your legs were shaking, the pleasure making you weak-kneed, your tongue lolling out of your open mouth, unable to quiet your moans. Kirishima’s pace was frenzied, excited, animalistic as he chased his own pleasure, the sound of his skin slapping against your own filling the room. It was incredible.

His dick hit all the right spots, pressing you closer and closer to your orgasm. If he didn’t let you cum this time you were going to cry. Your could hear the lecherous, sinful sounds of your pussy squelching, milky juices getting everywhere. It coated his dick, was covering your thighs. You could feel drops of wetness being flicked everywhere on every thrust, the wet, fast slaps of his thighs against you making your stomach clench even harder. The hand in your hair pulled up slightly, wrenching your head back in order for Kiri to give your a quick, desperate kiss - full of teeth and spit. He had hardly detached from your lips before he was mouthing at your back, spitting out filth as he did so.

“Shit, I love you so much. Wish I could be inside you all time - see how easily your body takes me? You were made for this, such a filthy little baby. Always look so tempting, always wanna fuck you, fill you up, make you squirt.”

His words were getting to you, as you were forced to watch him pounding into you, hips snapping and tensing in an animalistic fashion. It was too much - the pleasure, his crude words, the visual of seeing yourself getting fucked, worshipped. Your eyes closed, clenching shut as you moaned over a particularly satisfying thrust. Kiri didn’t like that. The hand not holding your head against the bed slipped underneath you, immediately finding your clit, pinching at it viciously.

“Open your eyes, keep watching or else I stop.”

You wailed, eyes flying open. Kirishima was smiling, still kissing sloppily at your back as he began playing with your clit.

“You always look so tasty, can’t tell you - Fuck! - how many times I think about fucking your brains out during the day - shit, you’re so good for me.”

HIs hips stuttered as he rammed forward, signaling he was close. He wasn’t the only one - your hands clawing at the bedspread, your hips moving and twitching as you tried to grind yourself against his hand, his cock slamming into you. His big hand rubbed you just right, and it sent a pang of sizzling pleasure trough your body. A broken cry left you as you finally orgasmed, hot, shaking, senseless. Thank god.

The wild twitching of your pussy as you rode out your high triggered Kirishima’s own orgasm, the man burying his face between your shoulder blades as his own hips twitched wildly, humping his cock into you as he released his seed. He was cursing, saying something, but it was muffled by the skin he caught between his teeth, making you squeal as you felt hot cum shoot into you. It took a minute for the man to slow down, thrusting through his orgasm and into the aftershocks, milking and prolonging both of your pleasure. It felt so good, so right. You were so high from the endorphins that you couldn’t even think to remember how wrong this was, how you didn’t want any of it.

Pulling out, Kirishima watched his cum begin dripping out of your cunt, pushing himself away from your back as he stood, chest heaving, body glistening with sweat. You were barely able to keep yourself up, still bent over the bed, legs wobbly and arms jelly. A separate set of hands pulled you to the side, and you let yourself be manhandled, pulled and situated in Bakugou’s lap, his chest to your back.

You had forgotten about Bakugou.

His jeans were off, along with his boxers. His shirt was gone too, thrown somewhere on the floor. The blond ripped at the shirt still plastered to your chest, the fabric giving in easily to his strength. You couldn’t bring yourself to care as it shredded right through the middle, freeing your tits. It’s not like it hid anything anyways.

“Jesus, that was so fuckin’ hot, watching Kiri pound into you like that. Look at yourself, leaking everywhere like a damn hose. You like having Kiri’s cum sliding out of your soggy little cunt?”

His chin hooked over your shoulder and he directed your gaze forward.

There was another mirror.

It was leaned up against the far wall, allowing you a perfect view of your sweaty, debauched body as Bakugou spread you legs, hooking your knees over his own so he could force your thighs even further apart. Oh god.

He was hard as a rock, moving your body around on his lap so his dick pressed up against the outside of your pussy, cum still escaping from your hole. You were exhausted, body limp and pliant - you didn’t know if you could go another round.

Bakugou didn’t care.

A harsh slap had you crying out, a sharp “Ah!” Filling the room. Bakugou slapped your slit again, and you tried to curl in on yourself, protect yourself from the abuse on your sensitive pussy. The blond slithered a hand around your chest, reaching up to grip your throat lightly.

“Stop that. Fucking look at this shit. See how sloppy your pussy is? Everytime I do this - “ He delivered another quick slap, and you writhed on his lap, which caused you to push against the hard cock nestled between your thighs. “ - You let more cream out.”

Without saying anything more, Bakugou shoved the hand not around your throat under your thigh, lifting you up just enough so he could slip his dick into you. HIs cock was less girth than Kirishima’s - it was about the same length but a more manageable size. He had been jacking off while watching Kiri fuck you, so his length was already coated in a layer of his spit and precum. That, combined with the cum already drenching your insides, meant he met virtually no resistance as he thrust up slowly.

You writhed, the hand at your throat and at your thigh keeping you steady in his lap. Kirishima was on the floor, leaning his back against the bed as he watched the two of you in the mirror, still panting and calming down from his intense orgasm.

There wasn’t any time to adjust, to ask Bakugou to wait, you’re too sensitive to go again! He was more relaxed than Kirishima, more controlled and languid in his thrusting. He rolled his hips, bouncing you gently in his lap as he forced you to keep your head straight, despite your efforts to turn away from the mirror showing your own reflection. You looked absolutely filthy - face flushed, tits bouncing, Bakugou’s hard cock drilling into you. You couldn’t help but moan, the sight stirring up something, some heated feeling inside your tummy.You liked watching them fuck you.

“Goddamn, every single time feels so fucking good. Shit, shit shit shit - it’s like you were made for us!”

He sounded so gleeful, so truthful. You unconsciously clenched around his length, feeling tingly as his thrusts ground deep, hit every single spot that made a sweet zing of bliss race through your body.

“Ah, ah fuck, you finally get it? You see what we’re fuckin’ on about when we say you look so damn delicious? Shit, I wanna take a bite outta you, so juicy and ripe and fucking perfect.”

Bakugou was out of breath, his voice deep as he growled at you. You grabbed at the arm around your chest, his thighs, his hair - anything to anchor yourself as his balls papped against you. You could hear someone moaning, whining and sobbing, was that you?

Kirishima had recovered, moving to kneel between Bakugou’s and your own spread legs. “Bakugou, you two look so good together.” That seemed to spur the blond on, his thrusts speeding up as he grunted. You screamed when you felt a wet muscle swip at your clit, looking down to see Kirishima grinning up at you, his tongue hanging out. On each thrust, he was licking at Bakugou’s cock, and then at your clit right above him, making you wiggle and spasm as you tried to escape the intense sensation.

“Kiri, Kir- stop! Stop, please I can’t! Stop, stop stop stop!”

You were pushing at his head, albeit weakly, but you were trying to move him away, becoming frantic as the combined efforts of the two men overwhelmed you, had you throwing your head back against Bakugou’s shoulder and gasping. Bakugou snickered, before plunging his tongue into your open mouth, stealing a kiss. You whined, scrabbling at his arms, Kirishima’s hair, trying to get away but simultaneously trying to bring the two of them closer. It felt so /good/, you didn’t even have the words to describe how heavenly and lascivious and filthy you were feeling.

“Hah, you’re so wet, you hear yourself? Sloppy girl. Taking me so well, shit, so goddamn good.”

You could indeed, hear yourself. On every thrust of Bakugou’s, your pussy squelched, greedily sucking him in. It was absolutely filthy, hearing your juices and Kiri’s cum sloshing together as Bakugou shoved his cock into you, again and again. You could hear Kirishima slurping at your cunt with fervor, could tell by the slick sounds and rhythmic movement of his arm that he was frantically jerking himself off as he lapped at the point where Bakugou’s hot flesh met your own. It was hot, not only in temperature.

“C’mon baby, let it out, let me taste you. Wanna see you clenching around Katsuki’s cock like the good, sweet little girl you are.”

Kirishima’s words hand you reeling, and the second his lips went back to attacking your clit, you were gone. It almost hurt, how tense your muscles became, squeezing an agonizingly delicious orgasm out of you. Bakugou felt you release, his thrusts speeding up as Kirishima kept his tongue out, laving at Bakuguo’s cock as he hammered into your clenching cunt. You were crying, twisting In Bakugou’s hold as you were quickly overstimulated, shrieking as you were left with no respite.

It didn’t take long for Bakugou to cum, spurred on by your writhing and tears, the way you were begging and pleading and sobbing, imploring the men to stop. With a guttural moan, the blond gave on last thrust, shooting his seed into you, hot ropes of cum filling you up. Kirishima was still licking around Bakugou’s cock, catching the cum and slick that squeezed it’s way past the cock plugging you up.

You shivered, relaxing against the hard chest behind you as Kirishima eventually stopped lapping at you, his own arm still. He had cum again at some point, pumping his cock into his own fist. Bakugou pressed a gentle kiss behind your ear, panting hotly against the shell.

“Fuuuuuck-“ he whined out “- that was amazing.”

“Mhmm.” Kiri hummed his agreement, slowly standing. The redhead flopped down on the bed, crawling up to sprawl out on one side, head resting against a pillow. Bakugou slipped out of you with no warning, your sudden gasp as you felt wet drip out of you making him chuckle. He maneuvered your lax body onto the bed, next to Kirishima, before pressing himself up behind you, trapping your body between the two men. You were too tired to feel gross, to mind the wet slide of your thighs as you shifted into a more comfortable position. Kirishima threw an arm around your waist, leaning up on his elbow to hover over and across you, stealing a kiss from Bakugou. Then he was stealing one from you, wet mouth connected to your own.

You didn’t fight.

When he flopped back down, you breathed a sigh of relief, feeling like you could finally relax as the two men stayed silent, all three of you exhausted, fucked out.

This was only the tip of the ice berg.

If you knew how often and intensely the men intended to fuck you near the mirrors, you would probably pass out. They just wanted to show you what they saw in you. It had been two of the strongest orgasms you had experienced in a while, but there was no way you’d admit it was because of their praising and insistence on making you watch yourself getting railed by them.

For now, you let yourself drift into a comfortable doze, let the heat of the two bodies caging you in keep you warm, keep you trapped.

Why bother fighting?

There was no escape.

1K notes · View notes

roger-that-cap · 3 years

Text

gold rush

everyone wanted steve rogers. as much as you liked to pretend that “everyone” didn’t include you, it did. but even thinking about being with a person that everyone wanted was more dangerous than everyone else thought, and you seemed to be the only one worrying about it.

steve rogers x fem!reader

word count: 5k!

warnings(not warnings at all): college!au, blink and you miss him charming!steve, very sweet!steve, meddling!wanda, dumbass!reader, this is a fluff show! have fun because i did! this is probably my last song fic for right now lol

all mistakes are 100% mine!

There was nothing about Steve Rogers that was a turn off, or anything about him that was a red flag. He was helpful and considerate. He took himself and others seriously and had a sense of responsibility. He had a great face and an even greater mind. He had the perfect group of friends and the perfect smile. He was a genuinely kind man. Nothing about him was unappealing.

Besides the fact, of course, that there was nothing about him that was unappealing.

The man was perfect. He was a perfect person who had no visible faults, so that naturally brought everyone to his feet, even if he didn’t want them there. There was no shortage of shameless suitors that wanted Steve, and that was the problem.

You didn’t like that, at all. You were never the type to run after someone just because other people wanted them, and you certainly weren’t the type that wanted to chase someone just for the thrill of it, and to maybe be picked by them. You weren’t someone who wanted to be picked, and you weren’t one who would think that you were special for being the one to be chosen over the absurd amount of people chasing him. And, his perfection frightened you a bit.

You and Steve hardly knew each other. You had seen him in passing, just as everyone else had seen him. Your absolute best friend and also roommate, Wanda, was close with some really pretty girl named Natasha, who was from Russia. Natasha happened to be close to Steve’s best friend, James—Bucky—Barnes. Which, by extension, meant that Wanda hung out with Steve all the time.

Wanda just so happened to really want to go to a small get together that Steve was having at the bar down the street. She invited you like she did all the time, and like you did all the time in return, you opted out.

“I’m starting to think that the reason you say no all the time is because you’re avoiding someone,” Wanda sang your way, brushing her hair as she stood in her towel and looked at the vanity. “And I’m usually right.”

“Well, not this time. I don’t avoid anyone.” That was a total lie. You avoided Steve Rogers and his little group like they were the plague, and you weren’t planning on stopping any time soon.

“Did one of them say something to you?” Wanda asked, her brow quirked upward. It was unlikely for any of her friends to be anything less than mild mannered and kind, especially to strangers. Wanda was the company she kept, and Wanda was probably the kindest person you knew.

“No, no, that’s not it.” Damn. You cringed at the indirect admittance of there actually being a problem.

“So…?”

She wasn’t going to leave without an answer. You bit your lip before answering, debating on telling the truth or not. Evidently it didn’t matter, because the word vomit did the work for you. “The people that flock around Steve make me sick.”

Wanda didn’t even wait a moment for courtesy. She bent over at the waist, cackling at the words that escaped your mouth. “Y/N, huh? Flock?”

“They literally surround him like he’s some wizard or something, it’s weird!” You defended yourself, not wanting to back down. “He’s nice, but it’s like he’s a flame and they’re all moths. He’s the sheep herder, and they are loyal sheep. Why does everyone want him?” You knew why.

“I don’t.”

You rolled your eyes at her. Of course she wasn’t a t Steve, not when she had her oddly robotic and smart boyfriend that insisted on being called Vision. He was nerdy and sweet, just Wanda’s type. “Yeah, of course not, but I don’t trust something that everyone wants. It’s weird.”

Wanda made a face at you, looking you up and down twice. You almost grimaced when you realized that she was seeing through you. “I’m starting to think that you’re one of them.”

You made a face that told her that she was way off, even though she was far too close for comfort. “Wanda, no. Don’t suggest that ever again, yuck.”

She cocked a brow at you. “So you think Steve is unattractive?”

No. Of course you didn’t. You found Steve very attractive, actually. Everyone knew Steve was attractive, but that was the damn problem! You couldn’t let yourself be drawn into that, not when you had so much work to do. You had been avoiding being stuck to him like a fly to a web since you first saw him, and you weren’t stopping now. It was almost like a game after doing it for so long, and you weren’t going to lose.

“I know you think he’s hot.”

“So?” Wrong thing to say, totally the wrong thing!

You were worried that you were about to get teased until Wanda just looked at you with a look of minimal pity. “Why don’t you talk to him?” You shook your head hastily. “You might have a chance.”

“A chance,” you rolled your eyes. “Why would I want to be chosen to be with someone? Ever thought about the way people fight over his attention like we’re on The Bachelor? Why the hell would I want to be in line behind people for the attention of one person?”

“That’s not what I meant, and you know it,” Wanda said teasingly, pulling out her blow dryer and politely waiting for your response before starting it.

“I just don’t see why I need to meet him and be enamored by him.” You knew that you would be. Even from afar, you couldn’t help but look at him and his hair, his eyes, his back muscles. Being close to him would be asking for the one thing you had been avoiding for so long.

Wanda gave you a long look, one that reminded you of one that a knowing mother would give her children when she knew how something would play out. You expected to get a lecture from her about judging people, but then she was turning her back to you, looking at you via the mirror. “Hm.” When she realized that you were still looking at her, she gave you a glance and playfully jumped at you. “Finish your newspaper column, nerd.”

§§§

You were in the café, looking like you had just came out of your dorm and like you didn’t want to be seen. You had your arms crossed because the vents were kicking in there like always, and you were shifting from left to right as you daydreamed.

You moved up in the line and looked behind you when you heard the squeaky door opening, not at all expecting to lock eyes with Steve Rogers. He was next to his best friend directly behind you in line. Bucky was whispering right in his ear. Steve’s blue eyes widened once you turned around and saw him already watching you, and then you gave him a sharp nod before turning away and facing forward again.

How did you not hear Bucky Barnes’ loud ass mouth anyway? He was always the first thing you heard when they were coming, and where he was, Steve was. If Bucky was doing things off campus, Steve was sure to be not even ten paces away. If Steve was doing something four states over, Bucky was probably there, too. They both followed each other like they weren’t allowed to be more than a mile apart before combusting. It reminded you of the way you were with your best friend back at home before you left.

You swiped your card when it was your turn, flashed the cashier a thankful smile, and then walked over to an empty table, opening your laptop and clicking away at the keys once you got into the right mindset to start. This week, you were charged with writing a piece about the swim team and their win, and it would be on the front page of the paper if it was good enough. You were going to make it good enough.

Ten minutes in, you noticed someone’s stare right on your face, burning red hot. You stopped typing and looked up, brows already raised at whoever was looking at you. You connected with Steve’s line of sight again, and he fumbled with his drink at the table he was at and looked away quickly, cheeks starting to glow pink. You saw Bucky laugh before rolling your eyes and mumbling under your breath, cracking your fingers and getting back to work.

You felt his gaze a few other times, well aware of it coming and going, and you were handling it just fine until you finally groaned and shut your laptop, putting it in your bag and rolling up your trash. You stomped towards the trash can than happened to be near Steve and Bucky, threw your trash away, and then went out of the double doors of the café.

The second you saw Wanda, you wanted to ask her what Steve’s problem was with you, but she was actually studying when you walked in. Wanda didn’t study unless she was in deep shit, so you just made a nervous face and sat down, quiet as a mouse out of respect your friend.

An hour passed with you just on your phone before Wanda’s textbook shut. She looked up at you, her face slightly exasperated. She blew a piece of hair out of her face and gave you a tight smile. “You wanted to say something when you came in, I can tell.”

“Yeah,” You said, leaning off of your bed a bit. “What’s Steve’s deal?”

She looked confused. “What about him?”

“He won’t stop looking at me,” You said with disdain, hating the way that your voice was bordering on being a whine. “I couldn’t even write anything good because he was staring holes in me.”

“Well, did you talk to him?”

You made a face. “Why the hell would I have done that?”

“So you wouldn’t have to rely on me telling you the answer to something I don’t know,” She pointed out, and you had to stop yourself from nodding. “Steve’s a really sweet guy. Just talk to him the next time you see him.”

“That would be the opposite of avoiding.” When Wanda made a face that said duh, you rolled your eyes. “And that’s what I do. Avoid.”

“Well, don’t avoid him. It’s mean, and… he thinks you’re… cool.” You couldn’t deny the way that your heart skipped a beat at him thinking about you positively, even if it was a lame adjective like cool.

But, you still hoped that you didn’t see him any time soon. You were certain that he was staring because you weren’t all dressed up and because you looked like trash in a common area, not because he thought you were cool. It wasn’t even that you thought that you weren’t cool, it was just that you definitely weren’t his type of cool.

“He thinks I’m cool?” You repeated slowly, and Wanda blushed a bit as you subtly mocked her. “Did he tell you this?”

She made a noise that meant exactly what she said next. “Not exactly.”

“Hm.” You turned your back to her, gathering papers from a binder and trying to forget about everything that had Steve involved.

“Look. You should just talk to him, it’ll be fun. You might even make a new friend around here.”

“Who needs another friend when I’ve got you?” You asked somewhat sarcastically, but both of you knew that you meant it. Wanda was the best friend anyone could ever ask for. She was protective, kind, understanding, and she could match anyone’s energy.

“Fine. The next time I see him, I’ll talk to him.” You knew that this was most likely a lie, but you had to say something to get Wanda off your back.

§§§

You were reading at the library intently, heavily immersed in the world of fantasy instead of the world of old authors who were already long gone. You had gone for an English assignment, but the Young Adult isle called your name, and it called it loudly. Your book was on the table as you leaned over it and scanned with your eyes, your mind long gone from reality.

“Is the book good?”

You nearly jumped out of your chair at the male voice behind you, and you sighed before turning around to see who it was. “It’s phenomenal,” you drawled, annoyed by the interruption.

Steve Rogers was standing right there in front of you, with his stupid, gorgeous smile and his naturally kind and inquiring yet never pushing eyes. He was standing in front of your sitting form, arms crossed but looking quite the opposite of hostile or standoffish. His hair was perfectly styled despite the way that he was dressed down, the way a college student typically dressed to go read a book at the library that was filled with peers that didn’t give a damn about anything but passing.

“What’s it about?”

Why were you talking to him? Why was he talking to you? It made no sense. He had no reason to approach you with all of his faultlessness, especially not while you were doing something that he no doubt found boring. Why was he even in the library?

You refused to be dumbstruck by him so many times, but there you were. “I- Yep.”

It was his turn to be confused. “It’s called “yep”?”

“Nope.” When you realized that he was actually asking a question that had an open ended answer, you shook her head from the cobwebs of nervousness. “It’s about two girls that fall in love during an apocalypse.”

You applauded yourself for getting out more than ten words in your stupor, and then frowned when you saw him walk around the table that was empty save for you and your things.

“Nice,” He said, and to your complete displeasure, he sat down at the chair right across from you, his kind smile never leaving his face. “Can we talk?” So that meant that he wanted to actually talk to you, not just small talk. Which meant that he had most likely looked for you.

“How’d you find me?” You cursed yourself for your lack of tact.

“You’re usually in the same three places.” It was true. You were either in the library, the café, or in your dorm. “I picked the lucky guess my first time.”

“Uh,” you couldn’t form a correct sentence. “Yeah. What’s up?” You were about to kick yourself.

“I just wanted to make sure that I haven’t done anything to you.” When you furrowed your brows, he dropped the smile and sent you a sincere look that melted your heart. “Wanda told me that you didn’t like me much, but I don’t remember formally meeting you. Have I done something that I don’t remember?”

Was he really asking that? Did he truly care about what a girl he had never had a full conversation with thought about him? And why did you feel like it was more than him just caring about the image that everyone in the small school had assigned to him?

How were you even supposed to answer him? He looked genuinely troubled by the way you had been avoiding him and what you said to Wanda. His concern almost made you go wild. “No. You didn’t do anything. It’s not you.” You scrambled with your book as you stood up fast enough to startle him. “Sorry. Gotta go.” You ran to the check out and checked out the book that you were reading, regretting leaving Steve there with every step you took.

He was too perfect.

§§§

“So don’t be mad, but I got you a date.”

Your head jumped up from your laptop. “What?”

“Yeah, I totally got you a date.” Wanda looked genuinely proud of herself, completely ignoring your horrified expression. “You get to pick the place and time.”

“Um, Neverland and at twenty- five o’clock,” you started, saving your work and closing your laptop. “Wanda, you can’t just get me a random date.”

“It’s not as random as you think.”

“You didn’t ask me,” you countered, giving her a pleading look. “Please cancel it.”

She winced. “About that. Uh, I can’t.”

“What do you mean, you can’t?”

“I said that you agreed. It took him a minute to believe me, but he said that he was excited.”

“I- why?” You stuttered, shaking your head. “I don’t like dates, Wands.”

“You’ll love this one. It’s basically like build your own date!”

“Yeah, I can choose everything but the person,” you scoffed, going to open your laptop again and sighing. “Please cancel it.”

“What if I told you that this person has had their eye on you for a long time?” Wanda’s words had your hand stopping right where they were. You hated that her words made you curious. She saw that you took the bait. “And has been trying to talk to you?”

You frowned at that. There was no one on the entire campus that was trying to talk to you, so now you knew it was horseshit. “No one tries to talk to me, I’m always in here. On purpose.”

“This guy has,” she insisted, her voice bearing desperate. “Please. He’s really nervous and he just wants to get it right this time.”

Nervous? You were making someone nervous? You were almost embarrassed with how flattered you got at that. “Wait, this time?”

“Yes,” Wanda breathed out. “He’s tried before.”

You went through your memories for a man on campus that tried to slide on you for a few seconds, and Wanda waited patiently. You couldn’t think of a damn one. “I don’t think so, Wanda. I don’t date people on campus. Or at all right now, honestly.”

“No,” Wanda dragged out dramatically, still not giving up. “Please, please, please! When have I ever steered you wrong?”

She was right, dammit. In every instance that Wanda forced you to do something extremely out of your comfort zone, you ended up loving whatever it was. She had you try food from a dirty gas station, something you’ve always been skeptical of, but damn, if that fried fish wasn’t amazing. She made you try a painting class where you drank wine at the same time, and you were afraid that you weren’t going to paint well enough. You ended up getting a membership at the place. She made you try salsa dancing. She made you try a Russian beer that nearly knocked you out of commission, but you still liked it.

There were many other things that Wanda made you try, but she was right. You never disliked what she had forced you to do, and she always forced your hand out of love. She had never steered you wrong once. That thought was made your scale of doubt tip.

“I- can I at least know his name before I go?”

She squealed.

§§§

You were not allowed to know his name, apparently. Not even on the day of the date. It was all a part of the mystery that Wanda set up for you, and she claimed that knowing who it was would spoil the entire thing. Because you were secretly so excited about going to find out who it was that had asked Wanda about you, you asked for the date to be sooner than later.

You were nervous, though. You hadn’t been on a date since high school, and that was just to the movies. You held the girl’s sweaty hand for two hours and kissed in her car until your mom told you that you had to come home. To make it even worse, you weren’t out yet, so you had to pretend that the girl who drove you home was just a friend.

You told Wanda that you wanted to meet the mystery man at a coffee shop. In your head, it was the perfect place. It was a place that you could leave early if the date was horrific, and a place where you could extend it if it—by the grace of God—went well. It also called for casual wear, and you believed that you could tell a lot about someone by their coffee order.

You didn’t even drink coffee. You drank hot chocolate.

It was the day of the date, and it was kind of cold outside. You grabbed a yellow sweater that was near the color gold and some jeans and cute boots, and made an outfit out of it. You were in the middle of leaving when Wanda was entering.

“Ah, you’re leaving!” She clapped her hands twice. “I can’t believe it. Thank you so much for agreeing to go.”

“You know, if this bombs, you’re gonna have a negative one on your record,” you teased, grabbing your small black purse and giving her a look.

“Negative one? Please. It’ll knock me down to like a fifty nine, if anything. But it won’t, because I know it’ll be great.”

“I hope so.” You were on your way out when Wanda called your name again, a hesitant look on her face.

“Just, give him a chance, alright?”

You stared at her for a few seconds. You knew she would never set you up with anyone bad, but that sentence made you hesitate. “Thirty minutes.”

A small smile grew on her face, like she knew that it was enough time. “Thirty minutes.”

It was a little colder than you thought outside, and it wasn’t even dark yet. You cursed yourself as you walked to the coffee shop, wishing you had brought the scarf that matched your sweater. You breathed out and watched your breath turn into smoke, a smile on your face as you pulled the door open and walked into the warmth of the coffee shop.

Everyone there was on their phones or laptops, working diligently. You assumed that he wasn’t there yet and sat down at a back table, so that whoever came close would be the one. You wouldn’t have to look up pathetically every time a person walked past you, and you grinned at the thought and tapped your temple, thinking in your head, smart bitch.

A few minutes passed in the quiet shop while you tapped away on your phone, playing a painting by numbers game that you were obsessed with, and that you had gotten Wanda obsessed with. You were thinking about hot chocolate while you finished coloring in the intricate flower. The chimes of the door went off, twinkling straight out of a fairy tale, and you looked up briefly.

Steve Rogers was standing with his hands in his pockets, looking around the shop nervously until he looked you right in the eyes. You held your breath. No way.

And then he took a step forward.

You kept your breathing as leveled as possible as he approached, walking past everyone else to stand near the table that you were at, eyeing the chair. When you said nothing, a pink flush worked up to his cheeks. “Can I sit?”

You were out of words. All the reading and writing you did was suddenly useless as you stared at him in complete and utter shock, finally closing your mouth again as you grappled for something to say that wouldn’t make you embarrass yourself.

“Yeah, of course.” The words left your mouth and he quietly pulled the chair out, sitting down rather sheepishly right in front of you. You swallowed at seeing him up close again. “Wow.”

“I know the whole one sided blind date thing was weird,” he blurted, some of his words a little rushed as he spoke. “But Wanda and I thought that you were most likely to show up if you didn’t know it was me.”

“Why?”

He took a second before answering. “I don’t think you like me very much,” he admitted quietly, a disheartened look on his face. “I don’t know what I did, but I want to fix it.”

So was this a date or an intervention for your own unstable feelings towards him? “I don’t dislike you.”

“You don’t?”

“No, you’re just…” you prayed that you wouldn’t use a word that was stupid when you stopped to think. “You’re very perfect.” You blurted, and when you saw the slightly startled look on his face, you tried to backpedal. “Not in a weird way. You’re just very um, the opposite of me, and everyone wants you. It’s kind of discouraging.”

“Discouraging?” He repeated, a confused look on his face as he tried to understand your babbling.

“There’s just-” you weren’t going to admit a thing until you heard what you needed to from him. “Wait did you ask me to come here because you wanted to clear the air, or…”

He cleared his throat. “I wanted you to come here because I think you’re cool.” You couldn’t help but laugh. So, he had said that. You smiled at him, a smart retort on the tip of your tongue, holding back the fact that you thought he was pretty cool, too.

But he kept going. “Yeah, I think you’re cool, and that your smile is gorgeous, but I also think that you’re incredibly smart. I like the articles that you write for the paper and that you’re really good with words. I think it’s nice that you tutor people for free around campus even though you could charge a lot. I think it’s cool that you didn’t rat Bucky out about the graffiti even though you saw him do it. I think you’re pretty awesome, and I’ve been wanting to talk to you for a while now,” He admitted, talking even though your jaw dropped.

You couldn’t believe it. You physically could not believe it. Steve Rogers, the apple of everyone’s eye and honestly the one and only of yours (no matter how much you previously denied it) just gave you more compliments in thirty seconds than you gave yourself all year.

You supposed it was your turn to talk. “I thought you were looking at me because you didn’t like me,” was all you could say, forgetting all about your craving for hot chocolate.

He looked mildly appalled? “No, not at all. It’s just… I always wanted to talk to you, but you’re always so focused, and I didn’t want to ruin it. I felt wrong every time I came up to you.”

The golden boy of the university really liked you? It was too perfect. It was impossible. But apparently it wasn’t. Your heart was nearly beating out of your chest as you registered it all, and then one thought was in your head as you cracked a smile. Screw you, Maximoff.

“Steve I… honestly, you intimidate me.” He frowned. “You’re so- I guess I can admit this now that you said all of that, but you’re perfect. It scared me, and it kind of still does.”

“I have flaws,” he disagreed lightly, tapping his fingers on the table.

“What’s that?”

“I have really bad social anxiety-”

You gasped. “Liar,” when he looked at you like he was offended, you grimaced. “I’m not calling you a liar, I’m basically just saying no way, me too.” He brightened up.

“Really?”

“Why do you think I only go like three places on campus?”

He looked around the coffee shop with a small smile on his face and then looked back to you. “Make that four,”

“Make that four.” You repeated, smiling at him softly. You took a look at your surroundings and noticed that you still hadn’t gotten your drink yet. “Oh, yeah. What kind do you like?”

He grimaced a bit, looking at you from across the table with his pretty, blue eyes. “It’s um, it’s kind of embarrassing.”

You shrugged. “Don’t be embarrassed, I just get hot chocolate.” He leaned forward with a smile and lifted brows, sincerely excited about what she said.

“Me too.”

The rest of the date was nothing short of amazing. They drank two hot chocolates each, he paid for the first, and she the second (even after all of his insisting that he would rather pay). You talked about anything and everything, and you realized that Steve Rogers was actually really smart. He wasn’t as book smart as you were, but he knew a little about everything, and he was apparently a jack of all trades (but he didn't want to admit it, because he hated bragging).

He was nothing short of perfect. The good kind.

You extended the date to about three hours, and when you finally had to head home, it felt like three minutes in his warm presence. He opened the door for you, and you were slammed by the cold.

“Damn,” You breathed out, and he immediately shrugged out of his brown leather jacket and put it on your shoulders. You looked at him incredulously, trying to hide your surprise and the butterflies in your stomach with a question. “You’re not cold?”

He grinned at you. “I don’t really get cold much.” You slowly shrugged into it, and you melted at the warmth.

You walked together to your dorms, picking up conversation from the coffee shop. You couldn’t get over that it was all so natural. It felt so right and so easy to talk to him after that first awkward hump that you two had placed yourselves. It felt like you just, linked, all of a sudden. You adored it. You could see that Steve did, too.

He was standing in front of your door with you when you finally stopped talking, slight disappointment coming when you realized that this was it for the night. Maybe for forever. What if it hadn’t gone as well as you thought it had? Would he want to do this again? You sure did, after all that resistance.

You shrugged his jacket off, but only got halfway when he held his hand out, smiling down softly at you. “No, keep it.”

You felt the whole zoo come out and into your stomach. “A-are you sure?”

“Mhm,” He said, an innocent grin that you were coming to love way too fast on his face. “You look cute.”

Your head shot down as you felt yourself get flustered. “Thanks,” you murmured quietly, smiling again when you heard his hearty laugh. You looked back up at him. “Thank you, for tonight. Thank you for asking.”

“Thank you for agreeing,” he countered, soft voice somehow still echoing in the halls. “I don’t think I’ve ever been on a date like this.”

“I know I haven’t.” And then, he did what would have made your heart stop, if it would stop beating so fast in the first place.

He took your hand in his and brought it up to his mouth, kissing the back of your palm gently, a fleeting touch that was just enough to make your brain have a malfunction. You swore that you saw a smirk on his face for the smallest of moments, and then he was stepping back with his typical smile. You loved that smile, now.

“Goodnight, Y/N.”

“G-goodnight!” You replied a little too loudly, causing him to laugh again. You did too. “Goodnight,” You repeated, this time in an exaggerated whisper as you unlocked your door and let yourself in, casting a glance at him one more time before shutting the door behind you.

Wanda’s reaction was immediate, and expected. “Oh my god, you’re wearing his jacket!”

#steve rogers x reader #steve rogers fanfiction #marvel fanfic #steve rogers x you #my fics #marvel au #college!au #steve rogers fluff

209 notes · View notes

loversdelusion · 3 years

Text

softer

deacon st. john x reader

a/n: please let me know if you'd like a second part of Deacon and reader finding out Sarah is alive and their reactions to it, I'd probably write it anyway but still lol, my stories are never proofread so if my grammar sucks, apologies

You've known Deacon a few years before the apocalypse began, you just so happened to be in Farewell at the same time as him, Boozer and Sarah were, you watched him send an injured Sarah off with a NERO chopper, your heart ached for the lover's separation, having grown fond of their relationship.

Until you've experienced the much softer side of Deacon, you've seen him at his worst multiple times, seen him break, seen tears streaming down his face, you've also been the one to calm the sea of rage and hopelessness in his heart once or twice, or several times. Deacon did vow to find Sarah with whatever it took, and you helped him every step of the way, you loved him, you weren't entirely sure if he loved you but you felt like you could feel it, in certain things he did for you.

In turn of you giving him a light in darkness, he has done the same for you, he was there when you were down, there when all seemed lost and hopeless, he was your shoulder to cry but you only used that shoulder in the darkest of moments, his hands have held yours when they trembled, his smile replaced yours when you couldn't bring yourself to.

That had to have been love.

You were sitting outside the cabin in Lost Lake, watching Deacon tinker with his bike, Boozer's dog napping in your lap, Deacon sighed, fiddling with a wrench that kept slipping off the bolt he was trying to tighten. "Maybe try a smaller wrench?" Deacon's head lulled back "This is the only wrench I have" he muttered back, annoyance clear in his tone "Deek, you've been fiddling with your bike for over 30 minutes already, fucking with the same bolt" you picked up the puppy and placed it in front of it's little house.

"What's wrong?" You kneeled down beside him, studying his expression "Nothing" he replied, lifting his hand back up to his bike, you gently placed your hand on his arm "Deek, your bike is fine, what is it?" Deacon's arm lowered, dropping the wrench to the ground. "I was thinking about you.." His voice was soft, tone almost shy, you couldn't deny that your heart skipped a beat "Wh-..what about me?" Deacon turned his head to you, he cleared his throat and shook his head "Nevermind" he stood up, eyes staying on you.

"Wanna go for a ride?" He held out a hand to you "Where are we going? We just restocked yesterday" he smiled softly "Just for a ride, I want to show you something.." You slipped your hand in his, standing up "Ride with me?" He asked, mounting his bike, you obliged, getting on behind him, and gripping the bars beneath you.

"Okay, Mr. St. John, have me back before midnight, yeah?" He chuckled at your joke, shaking his head and starting the ignition "Okay, Cinderella" the engine started, the bike lurching forward into motion.

The wind breezed through your hair, sending it whipping around behind you, you were leaning against Deacon, your arms wrapped around him, since you ran over a bump and almost fell off, it was his idea, not that you minded much "Do you still have nightmares?" Deacon's voice called back to you, your whole body tensed slightly "Uh.." You were nervous to tell him, afraid you were annoying with what you felt was your overbearing neediness.

"Are you?" He asked again, his tone taking on worry "Um, yeah..still do" you finally replied "For how long?" He asked, you sighed "It's on and off, sometimes I'll have good sleeps, other times I won't" Deacon shook his head. "How long, (Y/n)?" The only sounds that could be heard was the bike's engine and the sound of the wind breezing passed the both of you, you sighed breathlessly "A few weeks" you could feel Deacon's posture go rigid, you knew he wouldn't like it, but you said it anyway.

The rest of the ride was silent, not tense but you felt like if you said something that went against your wellbeing, the atmosphere would turn tense instantly, so you decided to just leave it at that for now.

Deacon slowed the bike to a stop, you could see a trail in the tree line, Deacon dismounted, you following after him "I found this place, a while back on a job for Mike, I got sidetracked, wandered off the beaten trail and found it" Deacon approached the edge of the trail "Come on" he held out his hand to you, you stared for a few seconds "I don't bite, (N/n)" he smiled, you hesitantly slipped your hand in his, he gently pulled you along the path.

You were both about 10 minutes in, it was quiet and peaceful, the sounds of insects served as background noise, you could forget that the apocalypse happened here "I came here a few times after that run, just to think and breathe" he muttered, your hands still loosely held together.

You came to a grove, one that made your eyes widen, it was beautiful and serene, there was a pond a few feet away from you with a small waterfall behind it, flowers and bushes littered the the edges of the grove, fireflies floating around silently, you were in pure awe, unaware of the longing look Deacon gave you and the warm smile he held on his lips. "This-..it's beautiful" you whispered, letting go of Deacon's hand and walking over to the edge of the pond, the water was still, no ripples whatsoever, you sat down, Deacon sitting beside you, it was quiet again, this time it was a good quiet.

It didn't last long too long "Hey, (Y/n)..?" He sounded nervous, more nervous than usual, you acknowledged him by nodding, too enamored by the calm sight before you, you could feel his eyes on you but you couldn't bear to pull anyway from the scene. Deacon couldn't help but stare at you, the same longing look in his eyes from before, he admired you, the shape of your nose, the curve of your lips, your soft (h/c) hair, your soft (s/t) skin, he licked his dry lips and snapped his gaze away.

"I want to tell you something.." His voice was quiet, your trance finally broke away from the scenery "You've done so much for me in the entirety of us knowing each other, you've helped me through so many up's and down's". "You stayed right by my side when I've been so crazy, especially on my search for Sarah" you shook your head "Deek, you don't have to thank me for that, I'm sure I'd do that if I never knew the fate of my partner, you're just looking for closure.." Deacon took his turn to shake his head "No, I'm sure everyone's sick of me" Deacon laughed lightly.

"But you.." Deacon moved so he was kneeling in front of you on his knees "I want to do anything for you.." His words were quiet, it sounded like he was afraid of your reaction but he continued "I want to be anything for you.." You were stunned, unsure of whether or not he was confessing to you or just telling you how close he felt to you.

Deacon paused in his ramblings about your story together, eyeing your expression extra carefully "You..don't feel the same" his head dropped in defeat "What? No" you sat up, mirroring his sitting position "Deacon, you have no idea how long I've been waiting for you to say that..I was too scared" you smiled shyly, you could feel heat gathering in your cheeks. "Scared of what?" He asked "Scared of me saying something stupid and you not feeling the same way, I never want to ruin what we ha-" Deacon pressed his lips to yours, silencing your worries, you tensed at first, a little surprised at his actions but you warmed up to it quickly, kissing him back.

You were in pure bliss, finally after all these years, you got to feel Deacon's lips against your own, everything he's ever wanted to say poured in it, Deacon ran his hands up your arms, your own hands finding the skin of his neck, you pulled away instantly, realizing what you were touching- his tattoo of Sarah's name, his love for her basically immortalized on his skin, Deacon looked confused at your expression until he realized what you were looking at.

"Hey.." His hand caressed your cheek "Sarah will always have a place in my heart, you know that, but..the rest is yours" your heart fluttered at his words "If you'll have it" Deacon eyed you, waiting for your answer, you couldn't help the smile that curled on your lips "I'd love that" you breathed, your arms wounding around his neck and pulling him into a deep kiss, his hands finding the small of your back.

Deacon slowly pushed back on you, carefully lowering you to the ground, him hovering over you "You can have all of me, (Y/n)" he said, gentle eyes gazing into your own "No matter what, I'll always be yours" Deacon pressed a small kiss to your cheek. "That is a promise I'll make to you, if you can do the same" he held a hopeful look in his eyes, his thumb traced your bottom lip slowly "I promise" you brought your pinky finger into view, Deacon chuckled, wrapping his larger pinky around yours "We belong to each other".

It was nearing nightfall, you and Deacon laid tangled in each other's arms ever since your confessions "It's getting late.." You hated to break the moment, but night held dangers of it's own, Deacon sighed "Yep, let's get back" he stood up, holding a hand out for you, which you took with a smile.

The bikes came into view, nightfall was in full effect now, the same dreary world was back, ominous screeches could be heard in the distance "Hey" Deacon said, drawing your attention back to him, he smiled warmly at you, easing your worries a great deal "It's okay, I will never let anything happen to you" Deacon made his own silent promise of that, giving your hand a gentle squeeze and bringing it up to his lips, giving your hand a firm kiss, you blushed.

"(Y/n)..?" He asked once you were both back at the edge of the tree line "What?" You replied "It'll probably seem too soon..though I doubt that" he turned to face, grabbing both your hands "But from how long we've known each other..I feel like it's okay" you could almost hear him swallow the lump in his throat from how nervous he was, you could see how careful he was trying to be with his next words, you laughed lightly "Calm down, charmer, you can't lose me now" your heart melted as you earned a bashful smile from him.

He cleared his throat, rubbing the back of his neck, you placed your hand on his cheek, Deacon could almost faint at the adoration you had in your eyes, that was all for him and he almost couldn't handle it, the way you held him, the tone your voice had when you spoke to him, everything about you was comforting "I love you, Deacon" the words left your lips in a hushed tone, it was like it was only meant for him to hear it, three words for him and only him.

His heart soared at the words you spoke, the words his soul ached to hear, your eyes were warm and gentle, Deacon was an anxious person underneath his gruff exterior, with a wall made of bedrock around his heart, only the right people could ever get through to him. You just so happened to be one of those people "I-..I love you too, (Y/n)" he finally found himself able to reply to you, he pulled you in for a tight hug, tight enough to keep you from disappearing as if this was all a dream.

Deacon found his person, you in turn found yours too, he loved you and you loved him, that was all you ever craved, him- in his entirety, mind, body and soul, he was the missing piece to your messy puzzle, finally, you found your heart full again, and nothing in this world would take that feeling from you so easily, not even Sarah.

#days gone #days gone x reader #deacon st john #deacon x reader #deacon st john x reader

130 notes · View notes

stayndays · 3 years

Text

𝐢𝐧𝐟𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝 - 𝐛𝐚𝐧𝐠 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐧

my gift to @wingkkun for @kafenetwork‘s holiday treats event!

genres & tropes - fluff, minor angst, comedy, misunderstanding(!!!), magical boarding school au (hogwarts but not really), dorm neighbors au, best friends to lovers au, shy!chan, extroverted!reader, gender neutral reader, chan’s pov

disclaimer - the entire fic is based around the fact that the reader was kinda accidentally drugged with a potion, two swear words, chan likes an unnamed female character (but hey in this case he likes everybody!!)

word count - 5.1k (uhm?? what the fuck?? this is coming from the blurb writer guys what the hell happened)

summary - bang chan does not have a crush on you. actually, he has a crush on his partner in potions class, and decides to do something about it… until it goes all wrong, and the liquid of a love potion is running down your throat. now, chan has to deal with your lovesick antics for a week while trying not to become infatuated with you himself. spoiler alert: it’s a lot harder than it looks.

a/n - it is i, penguin anon, the dude who made that survey for stayblr writers, a friend of your own friends, yes hi lol KJFSKDF honestly, this could be a very confusing fic to some people, as some things don’t line up, i will admit that! that’s mainly because i frantically put this together in the last two weeks while preparing for midterm exams, so not all the ideas i had in mind lined up correctly. regardless, i hope you enjoy this, especially you kai ^^

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐳𝐞𝐫𝐨, 𝐚 𝐟𝐞𝐰 𝐝𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐛𝐞𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞

Bang Chan does not have a crush on you.

You’re his best friend, his next door dorm neighbor at the boarding school he goes to. He comes to you for one subject, while you come to him for another. You’re the person he sits next to at lunch, and the counterpart to his timid personality. You are anything but his crush.

He does, however, have a crush on the cute girl he’s partners with in potions class, aka, not you.

“So,” you start off, tapping your feet repetitively on the wooden floor of Chan’s dormitory, the chair you’re sitting on face away from the desk it accompanies. “Let me get this straight.”

Chan nods for you to continue, playing with the blanket threads on his bed to anxiously wait for your response.

“You’re going to make a love potion for your crush to drink?” you confirm with him, to which he nods, lips pressed together tightly. Chan can easily tell how flabbergasted you are at his simple, yet elaborate idea, wheels turning in your head. “But this could go wrong in so many ways! How are you going to get her to drink it anyways? How are you even going to get the ingredients to make the potion?”

Chan scratches the back of his ear, which is slowly growing red by the second. A nervous grin slowly growing on his face before he answers you. “You see... that’s where you come in.”

He notices the deadpan on his best friend’s face and winces.

“...You want me to steal the ingredients, don’t you?”

Chan nods timidly.

It’s not Chan’s fault really, Chan believes, as you’re known for being a master at being sneaky. Not only can his own clumsy hands barely lift up a pencil before dropping it onto the ground, he has to be a role model to the younger students! It’s only right for you to do the job instead.

“Fine!” you throw your hands up into the air in exaggeration. “What do I get in return, though?”

“Hmm...” Chan ponders on your question, tapping his chin in thought. “Banana milk for a week?”

“Pleasure doing business with you, sir.”

𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐨𝐧𝐞, 𝐦𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐚𝐲

Bang Chan has made a huge mistake. It’s the kind of mistake that’ll affect his entire school year, undoubtedly. The kind of mistake that he’ll scream out at 2 am into his pillow, not only because it’s highly embarrassing, but also because it could ruin everything.

It all starts with a carton of banana milk.

The plan, originally, was quite simple. Chan had seen his crush fold open a carton of banana milk in class and gulp it down right in front of his eyes. Well, while he pretended to be busy looking up something in his textbook, at least. By gifting her banana milk, that was actually drained out and replaced with the love potion he brewed, not only would he seem like a nice person to her, she would be infatuated with love for him.

Two birds hit with one stone. Simple as that.

Until you came in, strolling down the hallway Chan was leaning his back on, eyeing the pastel yellow carton in his hands. He knows that his first period is potions class, he knows that you greet him every morning with that same smile on your face while he waits outside for the classroom doors to open. However, he should’ve known that openly holding a container of banana milk in his hands for everybody passing through the hallway to see was not a good idea.

And that’s how Chan ended up where he is right now.

“Hey, Chan!” You approach him with a grin, hair thrown back messily. “First of many banana milks you got for me there?”

Chan’s breath gets caught in your throat while you look up at him expectedly. His eyes continue to shift over from the paperboard box in his right hand to your bold eyes.

“Um- Er- I-” His fingers curl tighter around the drink, but his voice just so happens to fail him out of all the times in the world.

And then his head fails him, and he nods out of pressure.

He watches your eyes light up, and your hands lightly touching his own as you snatch the drink from his possession.

You rip open the opening to the carton. Pressing your lips against the entrance, you pour the drink into your mouth and down your throat, all in one go, right in front of Chan. His mouth is slightly agape at your bold actions, his head screaming at him to tell you what you just did in hopes that you’ll snap out of it before it’s too late, yet he stays silent.

“Hmm, the liquid is more like water than milk, but at least it still tastes like banana!” You gently crush the carton before patting Chan on the shoulder. His eyes widen when you pause, and then laugh in a dazed manner. It’s almost as if he can see the hearts forming in your eyes.

“Thank you, Channie. See you at lunch!” You wave him off in a flirtatious manner, something he’s never seen you do to anybody in all the years he’s known you, and his heart pounds faster with worry.

Soon enough, he falls out of his stunned trance and presses his back against the wall shamefully, slowly sliding down it. He’s too anxious to care about the weird stares he’s getting from other students going down the hallway, curling himself up into a ball.

“WhydidIdothatwhydidIdothatwhydidIdothatwhydidIdothat-”

“Chan?”

Chan’s head shoots up from his position on the ground, only to lock eyes with his crush’s worried eyes. He gasps quietly before rocketing up from the floor, brushing himself off, startling his crush. “Y-Yes?”

“Why were you slumped down on the floor like that?” He watches her scanning his face while he bunches up the sweater he’s wearing with his hands. “Your face is really red too… should I take you to the nurse’s office?”

“Oh! Uhm, no, it’s okay. I feel fine. Class is starting in a minute, regardless,” Chan reassures her, and fortunately to him, she doesn’t question it any further and changes the subject of their conversation.

Yet, his back of his mind sends him flying back to what happened previously. The flashbacks of you drinking that love potion right in front of his eyes sends a pit down his stomach, churning it to make him feel sick and lightheaded. He ponders about how much he screwed up this time, thanks to his stupid brain and timid decisions.

That love potion you drank was not meant for you.

You are not his crush.

𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐭𝐰𝐨, 𝐭𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐝𝐚𝐲

Bang Chan is a fool, a dunce, the embodiment of stupidity.

At least, according to his two closest friends besides you: Lee Minho and Seo Changbin.

“You’re such an idiot, Chan!” Minho cackles as he bangs his fist repeatedly on the wooden table of the school’s dining hall, accidentally sending his hot chocolate flying all over the place as he flinches.

“I have to agree with Minho on this one,” Changbin, who’s passive behavior is the opposite of Minho’s wild personality, tells the oldest boy. “You really messed up on this one.” He continues to flip through the pages of his textbook after cleaning up Minho’s mess with his wand.

Chan groans, letting himself fall onto the table pathetically, head first. He covers his eyes with his hands and shouts in agony, making Minho laugh even harder. Eventually, once the rowdy student calms down, he shakes Chan’s shoulder to get him to sit back up again. “No, but seriously, what are you gonna do now? They’ll be completely obsessed with you for the next couple of days.”

“A week, actually,” Changbin corrects, flipping to a specific page of his potions textbook and displaying it to the two. “A love potion's lasting effects depend on the amount you give the drinker.”

“And a milk carton holds like, a liter of liquid? So if you multiply those numbers, it’ll for sure last an entire week, which started yesterday,” Minho points out with his finger, directing Chan’s eyes to the info on the page.

Chan lets out a deep exhale, scratching his scalp as he processed the information. “So, do any of you have advice for what I’m supposed to do?”

“Don’t look at me-”

“I know, Changbin, you’re too focused on your studies to find a partner. I’m mainly asking Minho, our designated player in our year.”

“Well,” Minho cracks his knuckles before answering. “I’ve never accidentally drugged somebody with a love potion before, so unfortunately you’re all on your own. Fortunately, however, Y/N’s coming right your way!” Minho points cheekily to behind Chan, making him whip his head around.

And there you are, walking right towards them.

“Channie!” you stroll on over to the trio of boys with a pep in your step and a grin on your face. “Let’s go to Insanis!”

Chan’s ears perk up at the name of his favorite cafe near campus, always serving the best scones and cinnamon rolls he’s ever had, and the fact that you know his love for the place. However, he comes back to the realization that you’re under the effects of a love potion, so he shakes off the blush that’s threatening to appear on his cheeks.

Slowly starting to feel under pressure at the fact that you’re waiting for his response, he nods his head repeatedly with a shrug, packing up his belongings spread out on the slightly dirty, wooden surface. Your face lights up at his agreement, and you eagerly wait for him to stand up. Chan waves off his two friends, ignoring Minho’s snarky smile and Changbin’s desire to laugh right then and there, and exits the dining hall with you holding his hand.

You’re going to be hard to deal with these next few days, he thinks.

𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐞𝐞, 𝐰𝐞𝐝𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐝𝐚𝐲

Chan thinks you’re going crazy.

You’re acting like a drunk person whenever you see him, completely helpless of your own mind. Then again, you’re the one who drank the love potion a couple days ago.

He just didn’t realize how strong of a potion it was.

“Channie!!” you holler out to him from behind, crunching snow beneath your feet as you try and keep up with his pace. “Let’s go into the snow! Come on!”

He turns around to your grinning face, eyes drifting over to the bobble on the beanie you’re wearing that’s covered in snow. You point excitedly to the thick snow next to the outdoor path you two were walking along. “But we have astronomy class in half an hour, and I have to meet up with my potions classmate during that time, remember?” Chan objects, giving you an uncertain look.

You whine dramatically with a pout, stomping to him and grabbing his wooly coat, yanking him with you. “It’ll just be for five minutes!” Leading him off the pathway, the two of you entered the snow covered grass field. Chan shakes his head at your childish, yet heartfelt actions, watching you turn back and fall onto the snow back first without hesitation.

“You know I’ll get sick if I-”

“You’re underestimating my healing skills, Bang. Now get in the snow and freeze your ass off with me,” you point to the snow below you, slowly feelings your fingers become numb despite the knitted gloves you’re wearing.

Chan breathes out a laugh at your desperate attempt to get him to join you, shaking his head as he finally accepts your offer. Unlike you, he slowly sits on the ground at first and then lies down on his back hesitantly. The cold feeling of the ice on his back makes him shiver, and you giggle at his reaction while making a snow angel.

The two of you stay like that for a few minutes, taking in the sudden silence of the campus grounds and the snow falling on each other’s faces. Chan’s body is as stiff as a board by now, but he endures it for the sake of your enjoyment. That is, until he finally decides to get up after checking the analog watch on his wrist.

“Hey! Do we really have to go now?” you yell at him with wide eyes, making Chan roll his own.

“Yes, Y/N,” he pulls you up from the snow, turning you around so he can brush off the snow sticking onto your back. “Now I have to meet my classmate in just a few minutes.”

“Why her?” you whine once more. “Do you like her more than me?”

Your sudden question makes Chan pause for a few seconds, before shaking off the feeling of his heartbeat slowly gaining speed. “D- Don’t worry about it. Now let’s go.”

“Hey! Answer my question!”

You realize that not even Chan knows the answer to your question.

𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐟𝐨𝐮𝐫, 𝐭𝐡𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐝𝐚𝐲

Chan is a shy person when it comes to affection.

This day, however, he realizes that you are the exact opposite of him.

You and him have a routine every Thursday where you’d come into his dormitory at 7 O’ clock sharp to study until his brain was filled with herbs and spices he has to memorize for his gardening elective. It’s not his fault he didn’t get into the magical musics class like he wanted to, and got stuck with becoming a botanist instead. You, on the other hand, usually had trouble with your spells class, always pronouncing the Latin words slightly off. The two of you would study until it’s pitch dark outside, and then Chan would walk you back to your own room.

However, Chan already anticipated how this study session would be different.

He flinches slightly when he hears a set of knocks on his door already, checking the clock on his studying desk. Chan shakes his head out of disbelief, and opens the door without even checking the peephole.

“Y/N, you’re ten minutes early, why are you-“

“Chan!” Your face lights up and wraps your arms tightly around Chan’s torso, catching the boy off guard. “I missed you.”

“You- You saw me yesterday though,” Chan tries to tell you, checking the hallways just in case other students were around to possibly witness this. “and the day before, and the day after that, and-”

“Yeah, yeah, but even if I don’t see you for a couple hours, I still miss you,” you admit with a sudden, shy tone, burying your face into his chest. Chan feels himself flare up at your actions, catching him off guard. Not once have you ever expressed affection like this towards him, always settling for high fives and fist bumps, possibly even a side hug if you’re feeling nice.

“Just uh, come in. I heard from my potions classmate that our upcoming quiz for spells is quite hard,” Chan makes you let go of the hug against your will, and awkwardly guides you inside of his dorm.

“Ahh, why do you always mention her?” You question him with curiosity flowing through your voice, sitting down on his bed casually and tossing your schoolwork next to you. Meanwhile, Chan goes back to his spot on his desk chair. “It’s like you’re obsessed with her.”

Chan’s ears flare up at your remark, but at the same time, he fights the urge to call you out on your antics for the past few days. Thinking about it, it definitely wouldn’t do any good for you, and you needed his help for your upcoming quiz. “Nothing you need to worry about, Y/N.”

“But-”

“Let’s get to studying,” he urges for you to start with him, to which you roll your eyes at, but place your textbook in your lap regardless. Chan smiles softly at your willingness, and gets to work as well.

Typically, the statement “study until it’s dark outside” applies for at least three fourths of the year, especially since you two tend to stay on campus for the summer simply because you both liked the area. However, once winter rolls around and the snow starts falling, the sun is up for a lot less time, sometimes even disappearing by dinner. Chan knows this well, so the two of you instead set a timer for two hours and pray that you won’t get distracted by each other’s antics.

What Chan did forget is how jumbled up you get once the sun goes down.

“I’m already sleepy...” you mumble out behind Chan’s back, rubbing your eyes with your index fingers.

Chan scratches his head, contemplating his next move. To be fair, it’s quite difficult to get a love sick person to do what you want, even if you’re the person they’re in love with. “But Y/N, we’ve only been studying for an hour and a half.” He decides to move his stuff to his bed to join you, his joints already becoming stiff from sitting on such an uncomfortable chair.

“Yeah but I’ve had a long day-” you lean over so you can rest your head on Chan’s shoulder. “Even though I wanna spend more time with you, I kinda just wanna sleep...”

Chan freezes up, cursing you for being so sleepy at times like these, cursing you for being so affectionate towards him these past few days, cursing you for being so-

“Fine, you can sleep.”

You smile with a daze, closing your eyes. Mumbling a small thanks of gratitude, it’s the last words Chan hears you say before you drift off. Chan finds himself not being able to focus with the weight on his shoulder, twirling the pencil in his hand back and forth. He lets out a sigh, at last realizing how he’ll never get another word written down in his situation, and uses his wand to place his work away and close the light. Pulling up a spare blanket for the both of you to share, he finally closes his eyes as well.

Until Chan realizes that if his crush did the exact same gesture to him, he wouldn’t treat her nearly as well as he did for you.

You don’t know that, though.

𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐟𝐢𝐯𝐞, 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐝𝐚𝐲

Bang Chan is not good with love.

If it hasn’t already been clear enough. Although he’s had quite a few crushes in his teenage life, including the one he has right now, he’s never had the confidence to confess or god forbid ask somebody on a date.

So why not ask the person who’s under the spell of a love potion for advice?

Sure, it’s a far stretch, even Minho agrees, but maybe, just maybe, Chan could get something good out of this week.

He catches you off guard one day, bright and early before class, while the two of you were heading to your locker.

“Hey Y/N,” Chan asks you out of the blue while waving through classmates left and right. Thinking about it, it was a miracle that nobody was talking about Chan’s mishap and spreading it around. “Would you consider yourself... good at love?”

He watches you almost choke on your own spit with a worried look. You turn to him after clearing your throat with an almost offended expression on your face. “Why are you asking?”

“Well, uh, I wanna try confess to somebody..”

“What?! Who? Tell me,” you blurt out without a second thought, staring at his side profile with wide eyes. “Is it your potions classmate?”

Chan is quick to notice the gazes of your fellow classmates after you raise your voice, motioning for you to keep it down. “It’s nothing for you to worry about! I just need some advice on how to do it, you know?”

“Hmm, well...” you take a pause to think, resisting the urge to pout. “You realize you’re asking somebody who’s never confessed either, right?”

“Still, you’re more.. extroverted? Than me, so you must know more than me,” Chan shrugs, feeling his neck grow hot while he tries to explain to you why he asking you, not anybody else, without telling you the actual reason.

Your shoulders slump down in defeat, “Fine. Just- uh- ask them on a date first? If you just confess straight away, you’re most likely to be rejected because they may not like you,” you explain to him, your voice getting shakier and more quiet as time goes on. “At least if you ask them out first, they can start to like you at the date.”

“Okay.. I can do that,” Chan scratches his red ears, already feeling the queasiness in his stomach just at the thought of being rejected. “Right? Hopefully? Probably?”

You simply hum in response, looking down when Chan turns his head to get a look at you. He holds his breath out of instinct, afraid of a sudden outburst coming from you, but nothing comes. Most likely, Chan thinks, you’re more than upset because you’re not the one he’s confessing to.

It’s a poor idea, and was a poor idea in the first place.

You’re jealous, and Chan can tell.

𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐬𝐢𝐱, 𝐬𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐝𝐚𝐲

Chan tends to forget instructions.

So when he’s left out in the snow after his crush rejects him, your words from the previous day only then come back to him.

“I’m sorry,” his crush frowns once the words leave her mouth. “I don’t see you the same way.” She shakes her head, and Chan’s shoulders slump down as she turns her heel to walk away.

The feeling Chan experiences is neither his heart shattering into a billion pieces, nor the emotion of relief. It’s in between those two, for a reason Chan can’t figure out straight away.

It’s somehow not heartbreak, yet Chan still wants answers.

“Oh, uhm, one last question,” Chan perks up at the last second, his crush whipping around at the last second. “Why? Why do you not like me?”

His crush stares at him for a few moments, lips slightly apart. Then she laughs.

“It’s because of Y/N.”

“Y/N?”

“I can tell you both like each other. This week, I’ve noticed that your friend has been acting different, and although I saw that you were kind of uncomfortable with it at first, I could see you warming up to it,” she smiles. “Chan, you and Y/N have something that I will never have with you, it’s a given. I hope you come to realize that, if you haven’t already.” She nods one last time, bidding farewell to Chan for the day, and drifts farther and farther until Chan can’t see her anymore.

Later that night, when Chan reflects on his crush’s explanations, staring at the ceiling, he wonders if it would’ve been different if he listened to you more carefully. Maybe he should’ve slowed down, and instead of practically shouting at his crush that he likes her, he should’ve spoken more properly and asked her out on a date like what you said. Maybe then, he’d take her to Insanis, which happens to be his cafe of choice that you and him go to almost every week. And maybe, him and his crush would play in the snow and make snow angels happily, like how you two did a couple days ago...

No. Chan’s crush is right.

His head’s thoughts are slowly being all about you.

You, on the other hand, believe that you’ve lost him.

𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐬𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧, 𝐬𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐚𝐲

Chan loves you.

No matter how hard he tries to diminish his feelings for you that has grown in the only the past few days, he can’t stop himself.

From your happiness when playing in the snow, to the way you become cuddly when the moon comes up, to the explanation his own crush gave him.

It all lines up.

“Dumbass,” Changbin speaks up bluntly when Chan reveals his realization to his two guy friends while walking to the dining hall for breakfast. Minho laughs in response as Chan rolls his eyes.

“I gotta admit,” Minho swings his arms around the two, bringing them in closely. “You only just realize now? It’s impressive how dense you are.”

“Dense? Am I really?”

“Yes,” Changbin and Minho both say at the same time, and for once, Chan can only laugh. The trio approaches the dining table, while Chan scans the room standing up for your familiar face.

Minho, takes notice of this fairly quickly, “So, what’s your next move? It’s still a gamble, though.”

“Hmm? How come?” Chan genuinely asks his friend.

“Did you fall in love with the Y/N you’ve known this entire time, or only the Y/N you’ve seen this past week?”

Minho’s question makes Chan silent for quite some time, sitting down slowly on the dining benches. His two friends patiently wait for his answer, Changbin in particular already digging into his breakfast when Chan finally responds.

“I think I’ve always liked them, I just never realized it.”

To Chan’s utter surprise, they both nod their heads in agreement. Changbin swallows the food in his mouth before commenting. “I think you’re right. Maybe you just had that crush on your potions classmate to state that you and Y/N are just friends to everybody, without even meaning it yourself.”

Minho elaborates further, “And she said that you and Y/N have something between the two of you that’s unique? Then she must’ve implied that you guys have this bond that makes you two inseparable.”

Chan simply hums, taking in the information. He’s glad to know that he’s right for once, finally having a plan on what to do next. He sighs in relief, grabbing the nearest plate of food and stacking it onto his own plate, digging in. Yet, Chan still wonders where you were that morning, and how he only saw you later in the day hanging out with your other group of friends. Not even talking to him once.

You simply weren’t sure anymore.

𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐞𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭, 𝐦𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐚𝐲

Chan has not seen you for the entire day.

It’s supposed to be the day that the potion wears off from your body, and you can finally go back to your normal self (despite Chan’s wishes), but Chan has yet to see you. Not once at the dining hall, or the hallway potion’s class is in, or even with your other group of friends who join you in history class.

Fortunately, though, he’s able to overhear your dorm roommate, who says that you’ve refused to go to class today for reasons they don’t know. So Chan takes matters into his own hands, considering that nothing eventful ever happens in herbology class on Mondays, he decides to skip the period to head to your dorm room and approach you, with the help of your roommate giving him a spare key to enter.

The moment Chan walks into your room, a sudden chill goes down his spine, most likely because of the cold air. The lights are closed, with only the morning sun’s brightness seeping through the cracks of the window. The curtains that hang over your bunk bed, as you sleep on the bottom, are blocking his view from where you are. He closes the door gently, but makes sure he’s loud enough to alert you that he’s there. Peeking through the curtains, he sees your body covered in heaps of blankets, smushing your face into your head pillow.

“Hey,” Chan takes a seat at the foot of your bed, taking in your mellow appearance. “Are you okay? Are you sick?”

It takes you a minute to answer, and Chan starts to wonder if you’re actually awake right now, until you speak up.

“It’s not like you to skip class, Channie,” you choose to say instead of answering his questions. You appear from your spot in your pillow, gazing up at him with a tired look on your face. “What’s that in your hands?”

“Oh, it’s- uh- banana milk. It’s for you,” Chan extends the hand he’s holding the drink out for you to take, but you don’t budge.

“Are you sure that one doesn’t have a love potion in it instead of milk?”

Chan gets taken aback at your sudden theory. “You knew it was a love potion?”

“I could tell, even through the effects of it,” you state, finally sitting up and gently taking the milk from his hands. “Don’t feel bad though, since you’re here, I might as well tell you something.”

“During that entire week of being under that spell, I learned that-” you pause briefly. “If you already love somebody, your love for them basically strengthens by ten. It becomes something unstoppable, and you start to unravel your feelings for that person instead of hiding them. Originally, I wanted to kept those feelings inside of me forever, but because I accidentally drank that potion, look where I am now. Have you caught on yet?”

Chan could only stare at you, even after putting the puzzle pieces together. You tense up at his reaction, only fearing the worst to come out of this.

His next words surprise the both of you, however.

“That’s the best side of you, though,” Chan admits without a second thought, and you have to do a double take to see if your best friend, known for being shy and timid, really said that.

“C-Care to elaborate?” you stutter out through your shock, a light tint of red spreading throughout Chan’s body.

“The best side of you is the one you showed me last week. The one where you let your guard down instead of keeping up your confident persona,” Chan explains hesitantly and slowly, gripping his fingers tightly with each sentence. Then, he suddenly smiles, then grins, something you rarely ever see coming from him.

“That’s the side I fell in love with.”

“Love?!”

“Mhm.”

“Really? You’re not playing with me right?”

“Mhm!”

You groan loudly once it finally hits you, pressing your forehead against his shoulder. Chan starts giggling at your reaction, the both of you finally feeling at peace with one another. It’s as if all the awkwardness and tension from the last week drifted away slowly, with Chan’s now ex-crush leaving his field of vision, only for you to come in at the right time. He wonders how Minho and Changbin will react once he reveals that he finally got into a relationship, and how the rest of the school year will pan out with you by his side.

“So,” Chan starts to snicker uncontrollably. “You really are infatuated with me, huh?”

“Ya, Bang Chan! That’s the first time you’ve ever teased me. Ever!” your eyes widen in utter surprise, punching his arm slightly as Chan laughs harder, you joining him soon after. You nudge him one last time, coming up with something to make him as equally flustered as you are right now.

“But doesn’t that mean you’re infatuated with me too?”

@skzwriternet @stayracha-net pls reblog my fic for once i beg u

223 notes · View notes