#I will need Good Vibes to stay sane lol

[angels-fantasy]

Girl let me just say your fics are superb and thanks for the quirkless child one I requested with Bakugou! I promise I’ll leave you be for a bit in a second, but… post final war; everyone who has came out alive clearly is suffering from injuries, health issues, and trauma (both physical trauma and mental trauma) no? So how about a Bakugou x Reader with a reader who was essentially Bubbly, Firery and Energetic, to after the war who is exhausted, is often having nightmares over Bakugou cause well he nearly died, sleep deprived and basically depressed because I can guarantee nobody should be sane after a war, especially not children like our lovely highschoolers. Please make it angst to comfort, because seeing how Bakugou also has developed I’m sure as sad as he would be he would also be understanding and try to be comforting (despite his awkwardness). I’d appreciate if you could get this done to be as close as possible (and maybe just a little long than the one I requested last time- no pressure) BUT if anything you find in my request may be too triggering or something feel free to make it less triggering and change it, I just ask if you can keep the same vibe and theme with the reader who changed drastically after the wars and is getting comforted by Bakugou, Angst to comfort (duh), thank you so much, and I hope I’m not troubling you too much! — An anon who enjoys suffering, angst, and comfort ((SAC) Anon); (get it? Suffering, Angst, Comfort, SAC, wait that has a good ring to it, damn I have a new alias, I’ll shut up now)

I'm Okay, As Long as He's Here (Request)

Katsuki Bakugou x Reader

Details/Warnings: reader has a panic attack and nightmares!! pls be weary of this. angst to fluff, well, my attempt at angst lol

Word Count: 1k

thank you for your request and the support :D it means a lot to me 🩷 btw don't ever feel like you're bothering me or like you need to leave me alone! i like talking to everyone :) also this is a good little plot, but im not the best at writing angst but this is helping me improve i think, so please tell me how i did! i really hope you like it SAC anon hahah

Before the war, you were a different person. Looking at you now, no one would ever guess you were once a bubbly, out going person. But Katsuki knew you were, and sometimes, he missed the old you.

It was hard to watch you wake up crying in the middle of the night from your horrible nightmares of the war. Some being about his near death experience, and others being about him dying in other ways.

Some nights, you didn't sleep at all, and it was really showing.

"Hey, keep your head up. I don't want you to fall asleep." Katsuki said. It was already months after the war, so you were all back at school, but you were one of the few students that was struggling the most.

He definitely has his struggles too, but he knew he had to be there for you, because yours were much worse.

You opened your eyes wider, trying your best to stay awake. "Sorry. I couldn't sleep last night."

"You havin' nightmares again?"

You nodded, he sighed.

"Come sleep in my dorm tonight. You sleep better with me and you know it."

You agreed and continued trying your best to stay awake for the rest of the day. Occasionally, Katsuki would have to wake you up or remind you to stay awake. The lack of sleep made it hard to focus, especially in Hero Training. Thankfully, Mr. Aizawa and the rest of the teachers were understanding of the students who were struggling.

Once school was over it felt like a weight was lifted off of your shoulders. You knew you had homework to do, but right now you'd rather sleep. Or at least attempt to. Since you were going to be with Katsuki tonight, you were probably only going to have one nightmare. Plus, he'd be there to comfort you.

Following your boyfriend to his dorm room, you immediately changed into some of your clothes that he had there for you, and then laid down on his bed.

For a while, you just silently watched him as he sat at his desk and did his homework, something you should also be doing.

"What're you starin' at?"

You smiled, but not as brightly as before, "I'm just admiring you."

He huffed, "Good, I'm awesome."

Rolling your eyes, you said, "And there he is."

He laughed and continued doing his homework. You just continued watching him, because it was something that comforted you. It was a reminder that he was okay and alive.

Knowing he was safe right in front of you, you fell asleep.

...

You didn't know what time it was, but it must've been late since the room you were in was dark.

You clutched your chest as you sat up in bed and breathed heavily, feeling tears prick your eyes.

Of course, you had another nightmare again. This one in particular was about Katsuki, and he was in the arms of Shigaraki. You saw the villain use his Decay quirk on him, and your boyfriend began to crumble away but you were paralyzed in your dream. There was nothing you could do.

The nightmare felt so real and so scary, like they usually do. You felt so helpless and scared. The evil that emitted from Shigaraki and All For One was something you'd always remember.

You subconsciously began to rock yourself back and forth and made self soothing noises as you continued to have a panic attack. They never got easier, or less scary as time went on. It always felt like you were going to die.

Your panic must've woke Katsuki up, because you suddenly heard his voice calling out to you.

"Hey, hey! Breathe baby, you gotta breathe." He said.

You shook your head, "I-I can't! It hurts. I'm scared, I'm gonna die!"

He carefully grabbed your hands and held them in his. He took one of them and brought it to his chest near his heart so you could feel it beat.

"What is my heart doing right now?" He asked. This was a method he used to ground you during these situations, especially because he knew how you felt about him and his safety.

You looked at his chest, "Beating. Your heart is beating."

"Right. Now what do you feel here?" He asked, now placing a hand on the blanket that was on top of you guys.

"The blanket."

"What does it feel like?"

"It's soft and fluffy."

As he continued distracting you from your panic, you eventually calmed down. You were still crying a bit, but he held you in his arms as you let it out.

"He killed you Katsuki. I was so scared, and I couldn't do anything!" You cried into his chest.

He rubbed your back, "You know that shit isn't real, no matter how real it feels. I'm right here living and breathing. I'm safe, okay?"

You nodded and sniffed, "Okay." You placed a hand on his chest over his heart and felt it beat, the steady rhythm of it comforting you.

Katsuki grabbed that hand and kissed the palm of it, "Love you. I'll be here all night, 'kay?"

"I love you too. Thank you."

"It's no problem."

The next morning, you felt more rested than usual. It must've been because you only had one nightmare, which was an improvement.

You noticed you woke up before your boyfriend, so you just let him sleep a little longer while you got on with your morning routine. You had a lot of your own things in his room, including an extra toothbrush which you were thankful for.

When he eventually woke up, he walked over to you and hugged you tightly.

"You feelin' okay?" He asked.

You nodded as best as you could in his tight grip, "Mhm."

"Be honest."

"I am! I feel a lot better than last night." You insisted as you pulled away slightly, still keeping your arms around him.

He hummed and kissed the top of your head, "Mkay. Wanna sleep with me again tonight?"

"Yeah, I'll bring more clothes later."

He smiled, "'Kay. Let's go to class." He said and threw an arm over your shoulder, making you smile up at him.

Yeah, you knew things would be okay as long as he was around.

authors note

i hope you liked it! i'm sorry it was kinda short, i've been in a little writing stump but im trying to get out of it!

love ya 🩷

tags for bakugou fics: @doumadono @shonen-brainrot

#@angels-fantasy #fanfiction #fanfic #anime #writers on tumblr #bakugou katsuki #my hero academia #bakugou x reader #katsuki bakugo x reader #angst with a happy ending #light angst #mha fluff #bakugou x you

[astralwaifu]

Hi! Hi! Hi!!!

Remember me? It's the one who encouraged to do the genshin character compatibility trend i have been dying to do! Unfortunately, i couldn't find the person who i saw started this trend so here i am in your ask box doing this. So i guess you know how this thing works- like you send three characters to see your compatibility with, and then you send a little bit of info about yourself such as personality and hobbies. I love that trend so much and as much as i wanna stay sane, i wanna know if my favorites will actually match or vibe with me ehehehehe-

So anyways! Let's start!!!

Characters : Pantalone, Venti, and Diluc!!! My favorites!!!

Apperance (ft. Picrew) :

About me : So technically, i am currently a drained out student (and help me school starts soon), but i am studious and hardworking! My problem is, i cannot seem to focus on one topic at a time and i ended up forgetting things. I don't socialize much, yet i would always greet people with a smile. But i never had anyone else to share what i have on my mind (usually books and my own ideas) and i tend to overshare and sometimes change the topic that it gets all too confusing. I only have two hobbies, reading and listening to music. And i pretty much wanna stay indoors all the time and then be alone in a pretty, fairy-tale like place in nature sometimes. I am very much clingy, and somewhat get attached way too easily. And yes i do require headpats and cuddles because i never got any affection. And i get easily irritated and when i am pissed i get too far, sometimes. Yet i just want cuddles and affection because i am lonely, lol. Oh and i love stuffed animals and books and sweet-scented perfume as an addition. Also i have a fear of spiders, i pray at least someone can get rid of them for me. That is all ✨️✨️✨️

Author’s note: Heyya! Sorry it took a couple days, I got my nails done and can’t type as fast as before! We changed Pantalone with Welt from HSR, because for some unknown reason I can’t write him. Anywaaay, I hope you’ll enjoy this! Sending all my hugs to u. <3

Venti

I have a strong feeling that his outer persona is your inner one, so you sort of complete eachother in a way none of you really expected.

Although it would take a while to get used to his extrovert self, since you seem to be pretty much introvert, the moment you decide you are comfortable enough you’ll see a big change. Meaning - EXPECT UNENDING AFFECTION AND CUDDLES!!!

I swear Venti wouldn’t be able to keep his hands off of you - always needs to give you reassurance and to have you close to him. Would totally do the thing where he squeezes your hand three times to silently tell you he loves you.

Would show you the most beautiful views in Mondstadt, he knows every place worth seeing and knows which one will leave you absolutely breathless.

Whether you like it or not, he will sing to you all the time. You like a certain song? Expect to hear to it singed by Venti for the next two weeks, until you physically can’t listen to it anymore.

A small issue would be that he constantly need to be around people, to interact and be present, which you’ll find a little tiring. Loves to annoy you too so he could get a reaction out of you. Don’t worry tho, he will never cross your boundaries!

Overall, on a scale from one to ten, I’d give your compatibility an 8.5 .

Diluc

The moment I finished reading about you I immediately thought that Diluc is the one.

It’s just that the two of you are fairly similar, both in the way you are around others (although you are quite a pleasant presence, Diluc is just more grumpy) and in the way you share the same wish in your heart - to be loved by someone, held amd cherished despite your flaws.

And I can say that the two of you do a pretty good job at that. Main love language between you is physical touch, since both of you are touch starved. When you are around others PDA is kept to the minimum, but when the two of you are alone HE WILL BE ON YOU ALWAYS! Holding your hand absolutely everywhere you go in the Dawn Winery and around its domain, random back hugs and normal hugs, headpats whenever he sees you around the house.

Also kisses on the crown of your head and forehead (they are Diluc’s favourite form of intimacy), which make you feel so special and seen.

He will always find time for you despite his busy schedule. His favourite activity together is reading in silence next to eachother, shoulders touching, but each doinh his own thing. He is the type of person that would put your legs over his during this to help you sitt mor comfortable. You will absolutely fall asleep in his lap like that.

Carries you to bed when that happens - no one can change my mind !!!

The two of you strike me as that couple that doesn’t really fight and not because you ignore your problems. You really don’t have reasons to fight.

Did I mention you will never have to worry about bugs again? :)

He is THE MAN - 10/10 compatibility.

Welt

Loves to take care of you in any possible way he can. Mans just trying to make you feel as safe and as comfortable as he can. He loves you too much to have you feeling bad about yourself or lonely.

Indulges in all your little habits such as going rants whenever you find something you love. He’s listening to every word carefully, absorbing information. You will maybe think he doesn’t care, but in the next couple days you will find a lot of things related to your new book or idea in your room on the Astral Express.

He’s more mature and a big stand-offish, so expect cuddles only when you request them or really really need them. Doesn’t really initiate this kind of things. You will however have your hand held and head pat by him at all times.

Saved you more than once from Himeko’s bad tasting coffee.

His main love language would be quality time, you will find yourself sitting next to him anytime, anywhere, each doing his own thing.

Whenever the Astral Express stops on a new planet for a trailblazing expedition, he will take you on cute dates and a walk in the nature.

He gives me a 7 vibe. Maybe 7.5-8.

And little note to u : all of them would find you absolutely beautiful because, honestly, who wouldn’t?

#genshin impact x reader #genshin impact #honkai star rail x reader #honkai star rail #venti #venti x reader #diluc ragnvindr #diluc x reader #welt yang #welt x reader

[vaguely-concerned]

I binged through all of Dragon Age: Absolution today and honestly I really really liked it! I was allowing myself only some very cautious optimism after watching the twitch premiere of the first episode, but freed from the need for infodumps and setting up the characters the rest of the show actually rapidly gets better from there (some pacing issues here and there excepted but hey they were given 6 episodes, I think they did pretty well considering those constraints)! If like me you HUNGER for, you YEARN for, you CRAVE more Dragon Age right the fuck now, this is not at all a bad thing to help keep some of that hunger down while we wait for the next game, and has a few loveable new characters to get into and some great action animation to boot.

More idle thoughts/reactions under the cut!

first and foremost I love Roland and Lacklon so much haha, a surprisingly well paced romance considering it mainly happens in quick background-ish moments! I'm especially interested in Roland's backstory, since he's very chill and openminded for what seems to be a decently well-trained/educated Orlesian? Lacklon being like 'I want to hold his hand and suck his dick 😔 fml' every time Roland did something cool in battle was just *chef's kiss* too, it was kind of smart to have their fight scenes double as foreplay as well on a writing level since they're arguably the least plot-important characters overall (though they and Qwydion are definitely the heart of the story as far as I'm concerned)

I understand why Miriam clung to Hira so much since she just lost literally everything in her life, good or bad, moments before and that relationship was the only time she had tasted anything like real love since her brother died, but girl... girl when people show you who they are, believe them. marry Qwydion instead you deserve so much better (Hira gave me the Bad Vibes right away from how she didn't respect anything Miriam said or expressed and kept pushing in ways that made me really uncomfortable, so I won't say I was shocked or anything lol.) There is the (??deliberate??) mirror of Hira hugging Miriam from behind in the blood magic dream and Qwydion coming up behind her in very much the same way to rest her hand on her shoulder in the real world afterwards, so I have hope maybe?

can you imagine Dorian watching shitshows like this go down every other week all around Tevinter and tearing at his perfectly sculpted hair because Andraste's tits if you motherfuckers would stop acting stereotypically for FIVE MINUTES! could any of you go take a PISS without resorting to blood magic! Dorian's job is a shit job and he's probably been doing it for a while by the time of Dreadwolf so y'know. get my son a drink

speaking of Qwydion, I am so glad for further support for my theory that vashoth born away from the Qun are actually some of the most well-adjusted people in all of Thedas. they've dodged the Qun from birth by definition, they don't seem terribly interested in the Chantry or grand politics of any kind, they don't have a caste system hanging over them, they can step on anyone who tries to mess with them even if they don't have magic... truly the only sane people running around out here

so you're telling me the Inquisition screws Fairbanks over no matter what you do, b/c either he dies or he's forced into Orlesian politics. Oh buddy I'm sorry we should've just let you frolic around in the Emerald Graves on your own you didn't deserve this

Poor Tessa. she is probably better off without him in the long run but that's a rough week

I was so excited to see Kirkwall again, I saw the horrific chain statues and went 'OH HELLHOLE MORE LIKE HELLHOME'. it's so grim and awful I miss it so much lol

meredith, huh. so uh. hawke really has failed at everything, pretty much, then. even the few people they did manage to kill to protect everyone didn't stay dead. I'm just waiting for the dragon they killed in the Bone Pit to come back and ravage the city as well now, just to top it off. celestial punching bag of thedas hawke. babyyyyyyyyy if it helps I still love you the most and so does your collection of bi weirdos found family

rezaren wasn't even that good a mage, as far as we can tell, so you have to wonder what the FUCK dorian's ancestor was pulling to have created this thing that he could barely control with half a dragon's worth of blood (and what someone like Dorian, who helped crack time like an egg in his student days sort of just to see if he could, it seems, could do with it if they didn't have like scruples or other pesky things like that. everything we see about tevinter magisters makes me more impressed with how comparatively not fundamentally shitty Dorian has managed to turn out (no wonder Bull is kind of impressed with him for having actual integrity, if this is the competition he's up against). can you tell I miss him lol)

I found it genuniely interesting how much rezaren and hira are thematic mirrors to each other and mutually cannot see it, right down to treating miriam ultimately as an object. same self-centered idiot, different hairstyles. what a scathing indictment of Tevinter high society that even Hira, who's family was notoriously progressive and trying to enact change, still treats people exactly the same way as the other magisters when push comes to shove.

thank u to Lacklon for pessimistic cynical bastard representation, he is right that that dragon is going to ravage the countryside and someone on the crew has to keep clear eyes for that sort of thing even when it's a downer

#dragon age #dragon age absolution #dragon age absolution spoilers #dragon age: absolution spoilers #dragon age: absolution

[oldlovecassette]

Tag nine (9) people you’d like to know better

thanks @boshemians for the tag! “the trip” sounds like good fun TV and i might have to check it out

Last Song: “rather die young” by beyoncé which i woke up with stuck in my head since she sang it live on saturday (i’ll stop having mentionitis about this concert soon i promise)

Currently Watching: i started watching house MD with my family about a week ago and we’re having a great time bonding over one silly little guy’s love of medical malpractice. almost done the first season. lisa cuddy is mother

Currently Reading: franny & zooey by good ol’ salinger. unfortunately mirrors most of the complaints my friends & i have about dating and men in general these days lol. i’m also planning to finally start helter skelter the manson murders bible which i've had a copy of for nearly a year now (which weighs the equivalent of a healthy newborn baby). may not finish it til i’m in my 60s tho

Current Obsession: honestly i'm not obsessed w anything right now which is so weird and unusual for me. i'm just vibing and trying to survive and stay sane every day but i need something to be obsessed with. someone give me something fun to fixate on plz

obligation-free tagging: @phibes @bodyholly @sevenstarsinmypocket @deadband @paisanas @lvnalilly @strawmuncher @cosmikgoddess @frickinghot (feel free tho if you haven't been tagged and wanna do it to just take part / share some of ur current faves, i'm very nosy)

#if anyone wants to talk about house with me feel free. i'm enjoying it a lot and i've never been into any medical dramas like that #(and yes i am taking in the middle-aged yaoi aspects of the house-wilson relationship. apparently they move in together in a later season?)

[emometalhead]

Tag 3 people who have made your year better and send this to the last 10 blogs in your notifications (anonymously or not) ❣

I can't simply tag 3. So many people made this year wonderful for me, and I want to acknowledge them all!!

In alphabetical order by url:

@a-queen-of-the-clouds - Jori, you are always a joy to have on my dash. I have so much fun reading your tags. Never change!! I love you, and am grateful to know you.

@arnold-layne - My beloved!! We've been friends for a while, but I feel like our communication has really ramped up this year. I'm so glad that we've been talking more! You're a really cool person, and I love our interactions. Ilysm.

@awrestlinggirlwholoves80sbands - Alessia!! Sweetie, you are one of the kindest people I've ever met. I love your fashion, your passion for your interests, and how much you care about your friends. I am so so grateful for our continuing friendship. ILY!!

@born-to-lose - Mel, my beloved, my wife!! You know I'm obsessed with you. You are the language queen, a talented writer, and stunningly hot. Iconic all around. I love you and our friendship. Here's to another year! Kisses!!

@day-trippin-dreamer - TINA!!!!!! Our daily conversations have helped me stay sane through this crazy year. Even though timezones are not our friends, I love that we manage to stay updated on each other's days. We will meet up in Belgium to watch movies together one day. My passport should arrive in early February lol. One step closer!! I love you so much, and I adore our friendship. Thank you for everything!!

@deadhousep1ants Bee!! Hiiii! I am so glad to have met you this year! We talk more on Instagram than here nowadays, but I needed to include you on this post!! We have a lot in common, and I just generally think you're really cool. I'm really happy to be your mutual. I'm always wishing you the best! Ily.

@doctorqueensanatomy - Sheamus, I don't think I need to tell you how much I appreciate, because I say it all the time. However, I'm still going to tell you again. I love you!!!! Our friendship is precious to me, and I am so sad I can't hug you. I am still sitting, waiting, and constantly checking my email for when you'll receive any of the things I sent you for Christmas lol. I'm grateful for the opportunity to physically show how much I care, and I look forward to all of our future conversations (in text and call). Btw you're also like a super talented writer, and that needs to be acknowledged.

@duffmckagans - Kelsey, you're like a piece of my soul put into another person. We are so similar, and it's crazy how well we get along. I love our daily catch ups, and that I can text you about literally anything. There is no one else I'd rather sob to about Axl. I can always count on you. You're an insanely talented writer, so smart in general, and always have the correct opinion. You know I love you.

@emodennis - Phoenix, my dude, I am so happy we've become friends this year!! Last year, I wouldn't have imaged myself on Sunnyblr (as I literally didn't know it existed). I am so glad to be there, because otherwise we wouldn't have met. I'm excited to see how our friendship progresses in the coming year!!

@glamourizedcocaine - Alexi, you haven't been active lately. I'm not sure you'll see this, but it feels wrong to exclude you from this post. I love being able to scream nonsense about Gerard with you. You're a good friend, and I miss you on my dash. Ily.

@hobbitinneverland - İrem!! You're such a positive force on my dash and in my notes. I love you so much!! You always brighten my day with your presence. You're so amazing. Sending you the best vibes!!

@i-dont-like-rice - My dear Andi, idk if you'll see this, but I will take any opportunity to say how wonderful you are. I love your chaos. I love that I can talk to you about anything, and you'll understand. I feel like you see parts of me that no one else can, and I hope you know that your friendship is irreplaceable. I love and miss you! I look forward to our meeting in Belgium one day!!

@idontwanttospoiltheparty - Hi Fiona!! Your blog is so fun. It's the best hub for Beatles and Swiftie discussions. I love being able to see takes without absurd drama. I may not always agree with your opinions, but I have a lot of respect for you. You're really smart, talented, and all around fun. I'm grateful for our friendship. Ilysm.

@inquisitiveheretic - Lee!!!!!!! I think I'm incapable of thinking your name without screaming it mentally. You are my favorite mysterious mutual. I am always so excited to talk to you, and I feel so happy when I see you in my notifications. I think you're my biggest example of an opposites attract friend due to our wide divergence of interests, and that's really cool to me. You are someone that I take great comfort in, and I wish I could hug you. I think of you whenever I listen to Metallica, and that happens a lot. Love you.

@losers-yurio - Rylie, you aren't very active here, but I hope you know I still love you with my entire heart despite having less communication this year. I'm on better terms with my parents in regards to calling people, and I'm hoping to have more free time soon. We really really need to reconnect. I love and miss you so much. You will always be my first real Internet friend, and one of my favorite people ever.

@modernloverss - Syd!! First of all, I hope you know you can ramble to me about Ghost anytime, and I'll be very excited about it. It's been fun watching you fall down the fandom rabbit hole. All of our interactions have been so overwhelmingly positive. Your presence always warms my heart, and that is just about the highest praise I can bestow. Ilysm.

@nocturnal-light - Lynne, I am forever in awe of you. You're a creative artist, a stunning ice skater, and an impressive bassist. You can do it all omg. I'm proud of you for all you've accomplished, and I'm rooting for you from the virtual sidelines. Also, in case no one has told you lately, you're doing great with school. You will make it through!! I love being mutuals and friends. Ily!!

@no-fxn-club - Frankie, my dude, the iconic southern who confuses me constantly, you are one of my best friends. I will never be able to tell you I love you enough times. I am SO SAD I can't hug you!!!! I know you give amazing hugs. You have a big heart, and I'm grateful to be your friend to receive some of that love. You have an A+ music taste, a killer sense of fashion, and I always have so much fun talking to you about the most random stuff. I LOVE YOU!!

@nuttmeg13 - Megan, you were my first mutual! Though not directly, you did help me figure out how this place works lol. I'm grateful for you, because I really love Tumblr now that I've found community. You have The Best opinions. I have absorbed so much random Doctor Who information over the years, and I love seeing your fandoms that I know nothing about! You're one of my favorite Swifites!! Ilysm!

@ob-la-di-ob-la-di - Ameera, you are always a source of positivity. You are a talented artist, and I hold it so near and dear to my heart that you drew me!! I think about that all the time, because it was so sweet!! Every interaction we have brings me so much joy. You're gorgeous inside and out. I love you!

@only-a-heartbeat-away - Harlow!! I appreciate you so much. I can always count on you for participation in ask and tag games. It's been lovely getting to know you through games. You have an excellent music taste, and you're such a fun person. Ily! Thanks for being my friend!

@ramblinguitar - Hi Alexa!! First and foremost, thank you for all of the music recommendations this year. I think I've added every song to my main playlist. You have great taste, and a good understanding of what I enjoy. That's really cool. I'm thankful to have such an awesome, grunge mutual and friend. You're talented, and I wish I wasn't broke so I could actually buy bracelets from you. I love your work!! Ily, my dear friend!!

@smokeandmirrorz - Jeordie!! You're so damn cool. First of all, I'm so excited to receive your card this year. Your art is stunning!! I love your style, and it means so much that you were willing to make something for me again. You're so nice!! You have impeccable style, great taste in pop culture, and I love our conversations. One of these days I really hope I'm free when you do a movie stream or just a voice chat. Ily and our friendship!

@therockywhorerpictureshow - Ella, you are an incredible baker! I love seeing posts of what you have created. Your posts always make me hungry lol. A+! Also, your dogs are so cute. Such a pleasure to see!! I love seeing you in my notifications and on my dash. I'm so glad we're mutuals. Ily!

@tomkeifer - Ren, you're one of my favorite people and I hope you never forget that. You're easily one of the coolest people I know. You're incredibly smart, and I know you are going to accomplish great things in life. I am so excited to see that happen. You're a talented musician, have amazing hair/makeup skills/fashion, and are overall a good person. I'm forever impressed with you. Please drink some water. I love you!!

@th0mas-jerome-newton - Zoran, my Polish mutual, my whole heart. Ilysm!! You are such a fun presence on my dash. We don't talk very much, but you bring me such comfort. I'm grateful for you!!

@xx-key-xx - What can I say? You're an icon. I love your commitment to the 2000s. You are my favorite 2000s girlie, and I love your posts so much. Not to sound like I'm signing a yearbook, but stay cool ILY!!

#to all of my lovely mutuals whether mentioned or not please know I love and appreciate you all #thanks for helping make this year a little better 🖤 #anon thank you for the opportunity and excuse to compliment my friends! I appreciate you as well!! #asks #anon #mutuals

[allaganexarch]

Oh no these asks are GREAT I want to ask like ten of them ummmmmmmm having Restraint: 3 (vibe check) 4 ( 👀 ) 17 (especially curious abt your editing process?? I am so greedy for your tradecraft secrets) aaaaand 19 (I recently researched….. doormats. that made me feel very sane about my choices please tell me about yours)

GOOD EVENING i have finally returned to what is truly important, my tumblr ask box.

3. how you feel about your current WIP

JNSDKJFSDKNJ NOT THE VIBE CHECK but you know, I had a smol breakthrough like two? nights ago that i have yet to actually follow up on LOL. I had this transition section where i was like i need to impart some Vibes and some Character Arc but i'm literally boring myself rn, and I think I have figured out in a vague sense how to make the transition do a lot more work for me, so that's good!

In general I'm extremely excited about some Major Points of the thing, just currently have to do an inordinate amount of sowing seeds for those major points in a way that's like subtle enough that I'm not hitting the reader over the head but also exists enough that the careful reader will pick up on it you feel?

4. a story idea you haven’t written yet

Side note before I even start answering...sometimes I think about how many of my """"""story ideas""""""""""" are just glorified weather metaphors. I am genuinely not sure what happened in my brain to make me like this. What has the weather EVER done to me.

Uhm so anyway since I'm thinking about Stormchaser, definitely a story idea and not just a weather metaphor in a trench coat, why don't I tell you a little bit about my characters because I'm very normal about them.

The first person [main character we are tentatively naming Emily] meets in the city is Nolan, who owns a small bar and restaurant that she won in a messy divorce. She puts on an act of tough-and-wry-and-world-weary, but she's very soft-hearted and has a bit of a savior complex, a bit of that 'i don't want what happened to me to happen to anyone else' vibe.

She has taken in Asher and Aislynn, siblings from a prominent and wealthy family who have had a [very mysterious] falling out with their parents and are thus in need of a place to stay. Asher is guarded and protective, while Aislynn is very open and warm. People often perceive her as naive, but Aislynn actively chooses to see the best in others.

Aislynn has magic, which is the source of many of her problems. (This is like kind of a reveal but the foreshadowing is painfully obvious LOL) Back when I was thinking about Stormchaser as a multi-path story, one major decision point was going to be, in a moment where the player character is hurt (not gravely, but still not in great shape), choosing whether to allow Aislynn to use magic to heal her. It would have a huge impact on the MC's relationships with most of the other major characters, since most of them have very strong opinions either about magic or about Aislynn herself. Aislynn is also the reason I ended up wanting to write the story--I had an overarching idea for the plot, but I got soooo attached to her so quickly!

17. talk about your writing and editing process

as we all know my writing process is just getting possessed by some sort of weather-related entity and then not sleeping until well after the sun has risen, so I think that's pretty clear and doesn't raise any sort of questions or concerns.

if no weather entity possession, my strategy has become "just force yourself to write the painful and clunky sentences at the speed of molasses and then look at it again tomorrow" -- because most of the time the next day I can fix what was clunky really easily bc I made space in my brain by getting the ideas down, and sometimes, extra special treat, I reread what I wrote and it's literally not even bad I was just in a mood LOL.

I feel like a very large percentage of my editing is just being extremely insane about word choice. Sometimes I go back and forth on word choice/word order/very very minor sentence structure things literally long after the thing is published and I am trying to tell myself to let it go. But tbh I don't really have a process for this, it's just what jumps out at me when I reread it as being awkward or not quite what I was going for. I'm probably like this because I used to be such an insufferable snob (used to be!!!!) and needlessly chose so many ten dollar words that I think I have a better-than-average sense of when simpler language is better vs. when you need a more complex word to describe the thing. So it sort of depends on the character whether I do a lot of deleting or adding of extra fluff and filler words LOL.

I'm alllll about limited POV and creating a headspace/thought pattern for characters, so I do a lot of thinking about what the specific character knows, how the specific character would express something, or whether she even has the language for what she's experiencing. I really love finding ways of conveying an emotion that the reader will recognize but the character doesn't!!

On a more macro scale I think I do a lot of, like, "this section is boring me. why?" In a story you really don't want anything that's doing nothing, and you definitely don't want a whole section that's not doing much. Sometimes because I try to make my dialogue as natural as possible the conversation starts to kind of wander LOL, and so I have to be like okay hold up what are we talking about what needs to be established here. And then usually jump back a bit and figure out how to lead the conversation in a more pointed direction.

And a lot of the time idk how much transitional stuff to include, so I'll be off on some rambling journey like uhmmmm do I need this??? when do we get to the fun part???? Which, like, not to say the fun part will be easier to write or anything, but a lot of time that feeling of boredom is bc what I'm doing either isn't necessary and can be accomplished in a way that's more fun for me personally OR it's fine it just needs to be pulling a lot more weight in what it's telling the reader. I find I sometimes get caught up in, like, a story beat that would "make sense here" as opposed to a story beat I personally like.

Like, as an example, I've been thinking (for soooo long yes i know) about how to continue the chance you take, and I remember I put in my notes that like a sparring scene would make sense, where you know it's all a metaphor and there's some quippy dialogue or w/e. And ik a lot of people like that kind of scene! And idk, sometimes I do too! But like........I don't want to do that lol! And in fact I think it doesn't actually fit with the vibe of the story, which is so much less about the violence surrounding it and so much more about the quiet moments in between. But I'm literally just thinking this now as I'm typing this. Like I didn't have a good reason for why I didn't want to progress the story that way until literally right now.

Which I guess leads me to another very important editing tool: pacing my kitchen like a crazy person explaining the problem I'm having to myself so I can try to talk through why it's bothering me LOL! as you can see it's extremely efficient and time-sensitive. six to ten business days turnaround for sure.

19. the most interesting topic you’ve researched for a fic

chickens :)

I'm genuinely drawing a blank LOL, I've definitely looked into a few things I can vividly remember (boats/ships and how crews and shifts work for TCYT, horse riding/cart pulling for scorched earth, how animal testing works for uhmmm that one moicy fic, oh and I remember i looked a lot into bird symbolism for the prisoner LOL) but I think mostly what I do is intensely study the source material, and I haven't run into that many situations where I felt like I needed to make sure I knew about something in the actual world and not the fictional one LOL! Wow I'm boring! I want to know about doormats!!!!!

fic writer asks!

#the tumblr post editor has caused me so many newly discovered stages of grief i stg #exciting tag for answered asks #exciting tag for writing things #personal #tumblr editor leave my read more where i put it challenge!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #put that thing back where it came from or so help me!!!!!!!!!!

[apirateslifefor--smee]

support women's wrongs: a majke de spell playlist ( @majkemaniiia )

prairie girl by rah rah

i did something bad by taylor swift

bring me to life by evanescence

pierre by ryn weaver

nothing matters by the last dinner party

free by florence and the machine

you know i'm no good by amy winehouse

hounds of love by kate bush

still sane by lorde

run by daughter

prairie girl by rah rah

I am a prairie girl Straight to the bone I'll cut you off on the drive back home I spend my winters alone Yeah there's just no place quite like home

I feel like this song is so underrated lol I used to LOVE it in high school. This song is about being a #tough girl but also maybe you fall in love a little bit but NO YOU DON'T you get the hell out of there before you can get hurt. And it just felt like a good place to start for Magica who is very self-sufficient and independent but I also think somewhere deep down she is kind of lonely... but anyway it's fine she's a prairie girl!!

2. i did something bad by taylor swift

They say I did something bad Then why's it feel so good? They say I did something bad But why's it feel so good? Most fun I ever had And I'd do it over and over and over again if I could It just felt so good, good

Sorry sorry one thing about me is I'll sneak tswizzle onto these playlists. Obviously this song is about a lot of different things and not necessarily about summoning demons but like lowkey it could be. Magica is kind of the weird one in her family for being into shadow magic and I just think she'd be like ok u say i did something bad... but WHY'S IT FEEL SO GOOD!!!!

3. bring me to life by evanescence

Wake me up inside (save me) Call my name and save me from the dark (wake me up) Bid my blood to run (I can't wake up) Before I come undone (save me) Save me from the nothing I've become

Stay with me here lol. This is less about the lyrics and more about the VIBE. Like if there was ever a song to summon demons to it'd be this song. You know what I mean? I really don't think that's what this song is about but I just had to put it here for the vibes.

4. pierre by ryn weaver

And I fell for a vagabond, a month at tops Lied and said his bike was in the motor shop Drove my car once and made the tire pop Still we had some fun, till I came to 'Cause I wouldn't be with you

This song is about hooking up with a bunch of guys who are probably con artists/grifters/liars because you're running from your feelings about someone. And idk if that's true for Magica but I DO think she is like simultaneously really savvy but also drawn to liars at the same time. Maybe because she is a powerful lady and can handle herself so she might as well have a little fun. Also I just think this song is whimsical and witchy idk you get the vibe.

5. nothing matters by the last dinner party

I put my heart inside your palms My home in your arms Now we know nothing matters Nothing matters

I also kind of put this song here more for the vibes than the lyrics because it sounds kind of witchy and whimsical but I also think it goes with the theme of Magica's hot girl energy. She's here to fuck around and get what she wants and as I said she can handle herself etc so if ppl try to use her she will also use them!

6. free by florence and the machine

I'm always running from something I push it back, but it keeps on coming And being clever never got me very far

Once again the theme of running from something! Magica is always on the run but I think she also knows herself really well and knows what she needs to feel #free. Whether that's dancing or magic or something else. Also once again we are here for vibes. Florence is always a witchy vibe.

7. you know i'm no good by amy winehouse

I cheated myself Like I knew I would I told you I was trouble You know that I'm no good

To me this song is about thinking you're the bad guy and then finding out actually the person you're with is also the bad guy and still managed to hurt u even though u thought u were immune to that! And I think it gets at Magica's vulnerability despite this powerful witch exterior she has.

8. hounds of love by kate bush

Among the hounds of love And feel your arms surround me I've always been a coward And never know what's good for me Oh, here I go, don't let me go

I am obsessed with this song lately?? I wanted to give Magica one love song bc I think she should get one <3 This song is about feelings coming for u like a pack of hounds and you're like you know what let's just give into it! And I know this is not Magica's usual vibe but once in a while we see her soft side and I love that <3

9. still sane by lorde

Only bad people live to see Their likeness set in stone What does that make me?

I loveeee this song. It's so creepy and evocative. I think this song could be about the consequences of making yourself very powerful and like dealing with the fallout of that. What happens when Magica faces what she's done?? Will she ever?? Much to consider...

10. run by daughter

I don't know what we're doing I don't know what we've done But the fire is coming So I think we should run

Returning to our run theme! I don't know what the speaker in this song has done to make them have to run, but Magica is always careful not to have anyone look too closely at what's going on with her demon niece! And again I thought this song had a very creepy/witchy vibe so it seemed like a good place to end.

#magica #swyntask #playlist

[actualbird]

Your new fic has got me thinking about vibrators for each of the boys and how they'd react to it in them what have you done zak-

n/s//f///w text

hello, anons 1 and 2!! it seems that both of u were Awakened by my fic, "product testing is important for the d (the d stands for data) (it also stands for dick)" cuz these asks were sent back when i had just posted that and im oNLY GETTING TO RESPONDING MONTHS LATER, IM V FORGETFUL. but im glad u were Awakened cuz

i have Thoughts

would this member of the nxx team (assumed single, cuz in a relationship i hc things would change a bit) own sex toys? if yes, what kind?

wc: 1.5k lol

-

mc: yes, cuz she deserves to treat herself

mc went through the trials and tribulations of LAW SCHOOL and so she must have gone thru inhumane levels of stress. so shes got some toys. she needed them for good orgasms so she could stay SANE

i think in college, when she was still staying in a dorm with a roommate, she wouldve first gotten a small bullet vibe. the ones that are either a super inconspicuous design (i.e. designed to look like a tube of lipstick or etc.) or just really cute (i.e. bunny ear bullet vibes in a pastel color). this is cuz in the beginning she was RLLY EMBARRASSED ABOUT HAVING A VIBE and thus wanted it to be teeny tiny and easy to hide from her roommates

(sidenote about lipstick vibe: it would be HILARIOUS if mc has a lipstick vibe and accidentally mistakes the vibe for the lipstick tranquilizer gun luke gave her. one day, luke asks her to take the tranq gun out and fire a shot at the wall so he can see if theres anything he needs to do maintenance on on the gadget so she pulls out the lipstick object in her bag, presses the button and

it just starts buzzing

luke, beginning to blush: uhhhh

mc, shoving the vibe back in her bag: WHAT!!! NOTHING!!!!!!! STOP LOOKING AT ME, IM GOING FOR A WALK, NEVER SPEAK OF THIS!!!!)

later, when shes got her own place, she indulges and gets a better and bigger vibe. the trusty bullet can only get her so far, and shes in a new stage of her life: the employment under late stage capitalism

she needs better orgasms to stay sane thru that

for reactions to sex toys: in the beginning, she probably was having trouble figuring out how to use em to achieve the Good Orgasms, but after some practice and exploration, she gets the hang of it. usually goes for a destressing sex toy masturbation experience as opposed to aiming for something earth shattering. orgasms as a metaphorical glass of warm milk before bed, kinda. but it's a metaphorical glass of cummies

-

artem wing: no, cuz he's just not interested in that kinda stuff right now

while artem also went thru law school, i posit this guy does not own a single sex toy. nothing. nada. none.

i hc artem as demi and bi and like, he KNOWS OF sex toys but they honestly just didnt interest him cuz sexual pleasure didnt interest him that much. artem is well aware that being demisexual is irt the lack of sexual attraction towards another person lest theres a solid emotional connection but hes not gung ho about exploring sexual pleasure too much on his own as well cuz it's like...like how he thinks movies are more fun to watch with someone else even when enjoying the experience by yourself is completely possible.

so as long as hes single, hes just kinda "meh" at the idea of sex toys as a whole, will jack off the old fashioned way if ever the horny hits

the only time artem is gonna be in the premises of a sex toy is once he's fallen in love and in a relationship and if his lover brings it up. but thats past the scope of this hc post, so we move on

-

vyn richter: yes, cuz indulgence makes life beautiful also his high standards make for a Very discerning sex toy consumer

vyn has such upscale tastes in terms of interests: wines, vintage vinyls, tea that i am assuming is just the BEST and also expensive, and on and on it goes. vyn enjoys INDULGENCE and GOOD FOR HIM because enjoying what the world can offer is truly something that makes life worth living

and the world offers sex toys too and hes like "well, do not mind if i do"

however, vyn's standards are HIGH. in SSR Food For Thought, he was an absolutely merciless and scathing wine taster. i like to think this goes for a lot of the stuff hes into, if hes gonna indulge, he wants the Good Stuff, the BEST STUFF he can get his hands on

he only purchases sex toys that have unilateral good and detailed reviews and if hes unsatisfied, hes GONNA WRITE AN (ANONYMOUS) REVIEW DRAGGING IT on the toy's site. 0/10, would not use for orgasm again 💅

aligned with the indulgence thing, vyn is going after orgasms that are a bit more drawn out. not exaaactly edging or orgasm denial but close to it cuz prolonging the experience makes for 1) more time enjoying himself, 2) delayed gratification orgasms are scrumptious.

with that in mind, i figure vyn has maybe owns one or two Dedicated Favorite toys. cuz if it doesnt pass his standards of good quality and a nice drawn out experience, hes just not keeping it, bye bye subpar dildo!

-

marius von hagen: yes, cuz hes a filthy whore with the added buff of being FILTHY RICH

marius is a lot like vyn in the sense that hes got high standards (when ur rich and have the capability to splurge on stuff, that Stuff has gotta be Good) and is also game for indulgence. but the difference with marius is that hes way more shameless about it, hes inching past indulgence and into vague and unapologetic sexy hedonism

i Cannot fault him for this, his life is STRESSFUL so honestly you go, marius. get them cummies.

also, related to the fic that sparked both these questions: i do hc that pax has a sex toy brand that makes Super great products and marius is all about supporting pax ventures!!!! even the ones thatll go in his butt.

i think that marius would be the type to go for As Many Orgasms As He Can Possibly Have. marathon masturbation for this dude, when the mood hits.

and to do that, he'd need diff kinds of toys cuz if he keeps using a fleshlight the entire time, his dick will feel like it's chafing even with all the high end lube easing the way. so hes got a Bunch of stuff. not an extensive collection or anything, but at least one of Thing That Provides Specific Stimulation (fleshlight, dildo, vibe, maybe some kinkier stuff he would much rather be using along with a partner but until then he'll live using the nip clamps on himself)

-

luke pearce: no, cuz he 1) hates himself too much and 2) mc's parents may or may not have accidentally instilled a biiiiiit too much well meaning scare tactics on him as a teenager

the "he hates himself" bit is pretty self explanatory: luke pearce has the unfortunate tendency of denying himself good things because he thinks hes a No Good, Very Bad person. ive used this in 2943842 ways for angst but for comedy, itll lead to this. he does not have a sex toy cuz his self loathing is just THAT BAD. like HUH? HIM? MAKE HIMSELF FEEL GOOD???? that actually makes him feel BAD!!

i can forsee that many, many times luke has tried to jerk off just for stress relief but then his self loathing mental block was so strong it blocked the mental aspect of reaching an orgasm. this poor dude. love urself. accept urself

the SECOND bit is a hilarious concept i bounced around with beck once where like...what if mc's parents had a double standard, with how they raised luke compared to mc

cuz listen, mc's parents love both mc and luke very much!!! but also, yknow, parents have the tendency to be wary of Boys when theyve got an only child Girl

and This Boy LIVES WITH THEM

so fast forward to when mc and luke are going thru teen puberty and they both have to get The Talk and variations of thereof

and towards a teenage!mc theyre like "of course making yourself feel good is okay, and sex is okay too! but for now, focus on your studies, theres plenty of time for relationships in the future, but if you do want to pursue something on your own, make sure you do it safely because we love you <3"

and then towards a teenage!luke theyre like "hey. we're watching you we love you but we're watching."

this + luke's bedrock of self loathing = mc's parents, in their mission to keep their wonderful daughter safe, may have accidentally had a hand in making luke pearce among the most sexually repressed individuals on the planet

so uh. no. i dont think luke has sex toys. because i dont even think he reaches orgasm 60% of the time he decides to jerk it JHVAKJHSFKAJSHFAK

-

and these r my takes!!! i realize that for an hc post talking about sex toys, this post is like 0% sexy JKBKJKJKJFASKFJASF

#tears of themis #artem wing #vyn richter #marius von hagen #luke pearce

[runningfrom2am]

15 questions for 15 mutuals

Thanks sm for tagging me @sadfury omg i'm so excited to be included i feel like I'm a part of the community now what a treat!!

1. Are you named after anyone? Yes, two people actually! So my mom used to be an Olympics gymnastics coach overseas and she named me after one of her fave gymnasts :) then the other half of my name (i have a little hyphenated moment) is my grandma's middle name.

2. When was the last time you cried? yesterday lol, my best friend sent me a post on Instagram saying "our friendship has taught me what healthy love is" and i cried bc i love her so much and she deserves to be loved in a healthy way when she's faced so many struggles and it makes me really happy to know that I'm showing her the kind of love she deserves bc i try my best for her and I'm just so happy to know she appreciates that and that we have each other <3 ANYWAYS

3. Do you have kids? Nope! (Baby fever on the other hand... I have lots of that)

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot? I don't really think so, not really my sense of humour.

5. What sports do you play/have you played? Oh man, p much everything. Soccer, softball, basketball, but volleyball will always hold a special place in my heart as my fave <3

6. What’s the first thing you notice about other people? Usually their vibes- I am huge on first impressions and if anything is slightly off I'll have trouble trusting you forever lol

7. Scary movies or happy endings? I love a good scary movie but I get so emotionally connected to every piece of media I consume that I need happy endings to stay sane

8. Any special talents? uhhh i don't really think so. maybe that i used to play violin and sing competitively? I won first place in a gala and got a 2k scholarship when I was 11 so apparently I was good at it

9. Where were you born? BC, Canada :)

10. What are your hobbies? probably doing makeup, but idk how much of a hobby it is at this point since I work at The Makeup Store (TM) so it's kinda just my job. in that case, i guess it would be drawing and writing

11. Do you have any pets? i have two cats that live at my parents house about 18 hours away- i miss them sm :(

12. How tall are you? 5'3/ 5'4 ish?

13. Fave subject in school? definitely history (I'm a history major lol so i may be biased)

14. Dream job? stay at home mom PLS its all i want in life

15. Eye colour? brown BUT i have heterochromia so they're diff shades of brown lol, one is more of a greeny hazel and the other is dark brown

no pressure tagging : @slut4drudy @madelynie @mutual-mendes bc I interact with you guys the most and love to get to know y'all better but pls feel free to ignore!! (also if you get added after this is posted dw ab it bc i’m scouring for my mutuals haha)

[tamerahardy]

Summer of 2013

Now what I say here is very important to and key to everything moving forward. The summer of 2013 SHOOK everything up.

So in the heat of my breakup from Arthur I’m on twitter almost everyday. This is all I had. That kept me SANE. Jokes flying that year was real different. There was this one particular group of girls I knew through school. A girl group they seem to always be in their own world when I saw them. We would joke on twitter ALL THE TIME. Everyday. I’ve never hung out with these girls a day in my life I only saw them in the hallways in their clique…but we somehow formed a lil internet friendship.

Aside from how I was feeling I needed that. I still kept in contact with Camille even though I was in Decatur before I left for college. We ended up going out to parties and she would invite me to her home. I also made friends from twitter. Nick I knew through twitter we actually met in real life as well he became one of my close friends even when I had been dating Arthur. He again much like Aaron..kayron one of those friends that you could all the way with but you just don’t. He went to Drew highschool and normally on twitter it connects you with different people or mutuals. I ended up hooking up with two guys that summer as a way to “get over Arthur” and then I met the third

One day on my twitter a guy name Quadetrius followed me on there. I didn’t even know who he was but he went to drew and he was good friends with Nick. I like him a lot…he reminded me of Preston, I have a thing for guys that don’t give a fuck. Quad and me joked a lot over twitter it’s like we got to know each other for a bit before we actually met up in person, mind you I had been living in Decatur so going all the way out to Riverdale was a stretch but coming across him wasn’t even planned at all.

I was suppose to go out to Riverdale to spend the night over at my homegirls Jada spot that weekend she ended up canceling on me last minute so I got my brother to drop me off at my grandma and dad crib in Riverdale. I didn’t want to randomly bombsrd my grandma and ask if I could stay there I was in too deep with my plans to see my homegirl who knew Arthur as well. From there I was texting quad like what are you doing and he was throwing a party.. I got one of my friends to come pick me up and take me over there which he said was fine. Mind you I’m not dressed for a party I’m dressed for girls night lol a tank top with leggings on and my spend the night bag.

So I get to Quads place and he was indeed throwing a party. Come to find out a lot people knew him, people from different schools were there as well, I was nervous because I wasn’t use to that. I’ve been invited to parties before through my cheer teammates and being with Arthur but this was different. These were the seniors that graduated 2012 and had already experience college and life outside of highschool.

I was scared. It took me back to girls bullying me for popular guys liking me. I didn’t even know people knew him like that but I just ended up there. I had gotten uncomfortable walking around not knowing anyone there and asked if I could go in his room and he said yes. I laid there as went to entertain his guest. Everybody started leaving and as he wrapped up his convo with Jocelyn and Tina escorted her out he came to check on me. See now I knew Tina through Marcus one of Arthur’s friends Marcus is the only one I stayed in touch with everybody else left. Tina and Marcus dated and have a kid together and she even gave me relationship advice when me and Arthur dated but come to find out she only got close to me to spy on Marcus and once I found that I we didn’t talk too much anymore.

Quad knew all of the people I crossed paths with which was crazy. I didn’t even think they would be there at his party. Anywho….that night me and quad hooked up. Very innocent. He ended up taking me back home as well. Quad was such a vibe to me he made me forget Arthur even existed. I needed that honestly….but a lot of things came with Quad

Our first go at it was very raw and innocent I learned more things about life through him than Arthur. We didn’t work out because of not only the distance, but because I was so young and naive, we didn’t really get chance to know each other before we had sex….apparently I learned that I had took his virginity which was mind blowing to me but most importantly it didn’t work because he was still into his ex at the time who *drum rolls happened to be one of the girls I was talking about earlier that I would joke with on twitter.

Yep. I found out through some weird app you could ask anonymous questions on that we played on everyday. I immediately stopped everything and asked her about it. She played it cool like they were just best friends that dated she didn’t really tell me much about them she said she can’t tell me who to talk to at the end of the day and this is where things get tricky….

I mean here I am I had already hooked up with two guys after my breakup with Arthur and I don’t feel anything…and then I meet Quad somebody I didn’t even ask to meet and I LIKE him, but he’s dated somebody I view as a sister. Why did that happen? And why did I find out like that?

This girl … I viewed as a sister. It’s hard talking about her because again I didn’t ask to cross paths with her. By the time I was getting ready for graduation and I been devastated by the things me and Arthur were going through she appeared. She appeared before she left to go to college. Miles College, she came up to the school one day before she caught the bus back to school. I’m not sure why but she was there and. We stayed together that entire day. She came to my class and watched me make an ass of myself in front of Mr. Antoinette and she walked with me and sat with me in gym and talked to me. She was genuinely trying to help me get through my breakup and she stayed with me until it was time for her to go. It was like shes there to comfort sad souls.

I viewed her as a sister and somebody I listened to and here we are. I’ve had sex with somebody she really cared about. I didn’t even know about them. I had to really sit back and do my research frfr.

I mean when I asked her about it and if I was okay to be with him she made light of it. Like it’s fine…why didn’t she say no I still love him? Something.

Anywho Quad came over to see my at my grandma house and he said he was going to go over to his best friend house in which she was going to be there they were all best friends. He later told me he went over there and old feelings came back, honestly they never even left. I felt betrayed because this whole time I was just being drug around for sex or whenever things weren’t working out between them.

I was more mad at her because she controlled the narrative with this, but instead of looking like a controlling asshole which would have turned him off she flipped it. She knew he would come back she just did it in a way that didn’t reflect negatively on her.

[imaginatorofthings]

hcs for you (⁠≧⁠▽⁠≦⁠) but i'm sure at least half of them are wrong and they're also weirdly specific 

✿ you seem very put together and professional/organized to strangers (based on my impression of you lol) but with your friends you're super crazy and silly and not at all organized ✿ו

✿ yellow is either your favorite color or it looks rly good on you (this one is most definitely wrong but you just give me yellow vibes 💛) ✿ו

✿ you have at least ten unfinished drafts of stories you were writing in google docs somewhere that you should probably finish, but then you go on tumblr, "oh hey that's a cool prompt, I should try that —" and now there's twenty unfinished drafts ✿ו

✿ you're a morning person. like yeah, you'll stay up late but if you get up at 5am you're a lot more likely to be productive than if you stay up til 11:00pm working on something ✿ו

✿ you're either the most responsible, sane member of your friend group or you're the deranged conspiracy theorist and depending on the day you can switch wildly between them (this one is also probably wrong but idk, the vibes are there) ✿ו

✿ speaking of conspiracies, you have a lot of theories for whatever fandom you're in and will gladly explain them in full detail to anyone who asks

cracks knuckles

Let's see here...

Yes! That's correct! I need to appear professional around others (I thank my parents for nailing that in my head). The second I feel comfortable around you or in a space, expect my professionalism to slowly fall away. I'll start to act a little more whimsical and such. Now if you're a friend, that whimsy is dialed up!

Yellow used to be my favorite color when I was younger! I have a distinct memory where I wrote my name in yellow marker on a name tag and no one could figure out my name by the end of a summer thing because it was written in yellow.

Drafts...you're sort of right. I go on Tumblr, and either: a) I see a cool draft and go "Cool!"; or I randomly b) I get a new idea, or c) I burn out so quickly

I'm...mixed? Honestly? I don't even know anymore.

Oh yes yes yes! Be me, who scoffs at all the dice my friends have because where in the world do you have the space to store all that? But also be me, who looks at your friends' dice and randomly says, "They look tasty, lemme chew on them" just to see their reaction.

I actually don't have lots of theories for fandoms. I just absorb whatever headcanons people make and mull them over.

#Ima Rambles #ask #headcanons

[halfd3af]

I need to finish my grad school applications this week and I’m gonna explode

#theyre basically almost done but I gotta wait to see if I get this job because if I do… then I can put it on the resume/CV I have to submit #halfd3aftextposts #the new pokemon game releases on Friday and even if it sucks shit I’ll still have some fun #February is going to be hell for while I wait for acceptances/rejections #I will need Good Vibes to stay sane lol

[pop-punklouis]

Hi Hope. This is long ask love letter anon. I wish I had saved it, but i think i remember it word for word. I just wanted to say i love you so much!! Because your larrying isn't in the face and is very chill and even if you support them, both of them together and their music you focus on what needs to be focussed on at the moment. You give a comprehensive overview of concerts, L's music and the vibe. Hope to see the same for H's tour too.

Also, i think what draws me to you is i am a Louis Larrie or partial towards Louis too. I always joke, in their fight i know 100% who i would side with and who would get me in the divorce. I love Louis soo much. I want him, no i need him to be happy and shining and bright always. I mean i adore Harry, and think the world of him and his good soul and warm and kind heart. But Louis.. at all times i want to either crawl in his lap and curl into his arms and stay there or hug him and shield him from the world forever - depending on what his mood is.

Back to you, you are such a sunshine on the Tumblr dash, amidst all the fighting, and people just playing tug of war with different parts of their favourite artist. And there you are, just keeping it sassy but cool and living it up.

I love and appreciate you so much. Thanks for being sane(r) ❤️

(i really do hope this doesn't get lost in your asks lol)

i got it this time!!! haha ❤️‍🩹

there’s definitely different ways to go about the fandom! and just because someone else is more in your face about HL doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with that!! i have had my own fair share of clowning and bluegreener energy haha

and yes!! i’m so excited for HS3 and to see how different H’s tour is this round than it was for the NA leg. I think we’ll be working with an entirely different aesthetic, fashion, stage show, and possibly new music!

but this is very sweet and made me 🥺 ilysm grey

#grey #for when sad

[nightswithkookmin]

Hiiii, please response me😭

Honestly I wonder why Jk jealous of taemin when taemin & jimin having friendship?? I mean I can clearly see jk's jealousy. Please answer..... Borahae 💜

Ehhhhhh??????? JK is jealous of Taemin????

That's both an understatement and the most ridiculous thing I ever heard! Lol

Don't be shy, he wants to kill him. Say it! Lmho

Why is JK jealous of Taemin? Sounds like an existential question and I don't want to get into all of that mess.

I just slicked my edges down. Can't have these angry mobs peeling it off by force 🤧

But I get it. I used to find JK and Taemin's dynamic intriguing too but frankly, I'm over it. Lol.

I don't think it's as deep as the fandom make it seem. Especially not in 2021.

Word on the streets was Taemin had a thing for JM? and JK wasn't too happy about that- not sure about that but I can't fault him if ever he did. It's Jimin. Who doesn't want him.

But I think it's more delicate than that.

Besides, Jealousy shouldn't be our only go to label to explain every Jungkook emotion out there where JM is concerned.

Personally, I've sought to revolutionize the term Jeonlous and Jimlous in the way that we as a fandom perceive and think on it as a complex human emotion, one that centers mostly on boundaries rather than frivolous feelings of possessiveness or envy.

So to me, if JK really is 'jealous' in regards to Taemin then I'd assume it's because Taemin breached his personal boundaries where JM is concerned. It's as simple as that.

Which I believe was the case.

I try not to speculate on dynamics other than BTS's as it goes against my better conscience- Yes I have one. Shut up and read. Lol.

I tortured myself to death, figuratively speaking of course, the last time I tried commenting on a dynamic outside of BTS- JK and Mijoo's situation.

I don't think it's ethical...

When it comes to JK and Taemin's dynamic, one thing you should understand is they aren't friends. Not that we know of.

Jimin and Taemin are friends in the same interest group, the Padding Squad. JK isn't a member of that interest group- perhaps because he doesn't share their interests.

Jhope passed on becoming a member of the Padding Squad because his hobbies and interests didn't align with that of the members- Sungwoon. He introduced Sungwoon to Suga instead who then introduced him to JM.

One thing that Jhope said about Sungwoon was that he enjoyed outing which was a lifestyle incompatible with his own.

Now since Sungwoon said he clicked with JM right away, I'd assume its because JM enjoyed going out and stuff like that- among other things.

Jk in those days wasn't known as the outing kind and preferred staying indoors to going out. I think this is one of the contrasts between JK and Jimin's personalities.

So if JM has a bunch of friends who enjoy going out as much, then I don't see how JK would fit into that circle.

Taemin and JK move in totally different circles. They don't have much in common beyond the fact they are both close to Jimin. In my opinion. I could be wrong.

Jimin have said he doesn't like to share his friends but of course we've seen him, Sungwoon and JK hang out a few times. Those three have a friendship going on unlike in TaeminMinKook's case.

It's speculated, Jimin introduced JK to Sungwoon but this was during one of Sungwoon's time off and the three got to hang together which I think is great.

Not sure if, JM has had similar opportunity to introduce Taemin and JK. That would depend on their schedules and what they do during their free time.

Introductions are necessary in friendship culture and we cannot undervalue JM's role in facilitating camaradship between those two.

If they are 'not friends' ask JM why. Smirk.

Their 'differences' and why their 'not friends' to me has more to do with their unique individualities and interests but also their age difference and culture?

Jealousy sounds plausible but you have to consider the fact age is a huge thing in the South Korean culture.

Taemin is much older than JK and ordinarily we cannot reasonably expect for them to be as close much less be friends to begin with- per the dictates of their culture.

As much as we love to rave on about the hyung/dongsaeng dynamics in their culture, from the little I know of their culture, older people and younger people aren't expected to mingle so easily or act so casually.

Besides, hyung/dongsaengs aren't considered friendmates in their culture.

A high level of respect and reverence is required within such a dynamic and boundaries are expected to be upheld at all times too so I guess we can chalk it up to that too I think.

The only way a younger person can be considered friends with or close with or even treat an older person as 'a friend' is if the older one allows for that level of familiarity between them.

Without that kind of permission, their relationship is viewed as strictly an older hyung to younger dongsaeng relationship and formality must be respected by both sides.

I think we've talked about this? This is what JK was going on about in his conversation with Tae in Soop. Tae was giving JK permission to treat him as 'friends' within the group but JK insisted on the formality and boundaries expected between them as hyung as and dongsaeng.

If JK believes he needs to uphold boundaries with people older than him and not get too close to them, what makes you think he would consider older people besides his bandmates 'friends' or treat them casually like one?

The thing about JK, he is a bit cliquey... in my opinion that is. I'm gonna get in trouble, am I not? Chilee.

I often talk about JK and exclusivity or his tendencies for exclusive behaviors....

Once my sister told me, when she first enrolled to uni, how everyone she'd met would ask of her age first before they even asked which country she was from and some of the girls on her floor wouldn't talk to her because they considered her older than them and as such kept their distance or something like that- out of respect for and she had to give those that fuxked with her permission to address her a casual way- personally, I thought they were just being ageists and racists as fuck but then a year into her stay she said she sort of got the hang of it. That it was a cultural thing- Stockholms is real people. Lmho.

Bitxh wouldn't know a friend from a foe. Can't relate. Foe till proven friends!

Gotta smart yourself out here- Hold on...

Is this why I don't have no friends???!!!!!

😥😥😥😥😥💀

Chilee. This is not good.

She explained, most of the people she later became friends with seemed to prefer making friends with foreigners because they felt the age barrier thingy didn't apply there and they had the freedom to express themselves freely with them regardless of their age.

People that are considered 'friends' in their culture are usually people around the same age while a hyung/dongsaeng friendship dynamic often invite brows and gazes- if you know what I mean. A hyung who allows a dongsaeng to be friends with them gives that dongsaeng status at best, at worst is opening the younger one to cultural criticism especially in how the older one is addressed.

So when Namjoon refers to Jimin as a friend it hits hard and reflects how deep and special their bond is as compared to say Vmin or NamHope who are close in age. Same age friendships would have to be qualified to denote how special their bond is. So for Vmin you'd see them going out of their way to talk about that they are soulmates, besties etc.

When JM talks about that all of his friends are hyungs, it a form of social proof. One cannot be friends with hyungs just like that. Jimin is cool and has social status.

If Jimin ever refers to JK as a friend he would be admitting he allows for a certain level of familiarity between them that is out of the ordinary just as his dynamic with Taemin and RM is.

I say all this so you can deep it when an older says to a young one, he is my friend.

RM says JM is his friend.

Mess with Minimoni, I'll stab you.

Taemin says JM is his closest 'friend' in the padding squad- or maybe I misunderstood what he meant but he keeps talking about Jimin and how close they are and how special their relationship is in the media and what not...

Deep it and deep it for JK too. Lmho.

He's lucky he is alive!

In my opinion, JK doesn't do too well around people who pull ranks over him. He tends to have his guard up around them and he tries to maintain formality with them.

It all depends on how comfortable JK is around certain group of friends Jimin has. Just as, it's not all friends of JK JM vibes with. Smirk.

Ok listen, I tried this sane shipper thingy yall recommended, it's not working for me-

If Taemin is not fucking with JK, JK is not gonna be fucking with him. So simple. I tried beating around the bush but chilee JK is not the problem Taemin is. There I said it.

In my opinion of course.

Whatever thing they had going on seemed personal and it could be as a result of anything.

It could be JK doesn't agree with his choices, lifestyle or influence on JM. It could also be Taemin does not approve of JK for JM. It could be he said something JK took offense at. Literally anything.

Whereas JK have reacted strongly to him in the past, I don't think I've seen Taemin have a similar strong reaction to JK. I could be wrong.

To me, he's always laughed those moments off as if JK were overreacting to something trivial- which, it's Jk, I won't put it past him but I find that behavior annoying and condescending as fuck coming from Taemin. No disrespect to Taemin.

For whatever reason, JM has always put his friendships on a pedestal talking about that his relationships is gold to him and what not and he prides himself in the fact he goes out of his way to nurture his relationships.... cool.

Love it for him.

But JK on the other hand has been striving to put up boundaries for JM in regards to the people he surrounds himself with and I don't think Taemin is an exception or was an exception.

JK has a lot of boundaries, I keep saying and they may not be the kind of boundaries you expect to see from him but he has them regardless.

He prefers for instance not to be so casual with people older than him for obvious reasons as he keeps saying, I'd assume it's a value he's tried to pass on to JM several times over the years- what is JM's view on that? Clearly JM has his own values.

JK has said he doesn't have friends and when he started making friends they were all within the same age group- the 97 liners.

JM on the other hand says all his friends are hyungs and he has one same age friend- V. Sidenote: Can't he just make Idol friends within the same age group besides V?

What goes on?!

Do y'all see the conflict of values there?

It's not always about Jealousy if you ask me.

Their values on certain things don't align.

I'm sorry. Lmho.

I mean I have said this several times now!

It's taken JK a hot minute to come to terms with, accept and get used to certain things especially in his relationship and personal life and it shows in the way he talked about 'dressing up' more often in his recent VLive, and how he seems to be acknowledging that he is a celebrity with power and status and he has to be conscious of that going forward.

Contrast that with a two years ago when he didn't even care about how he dressed to the airport and Jm said he had to use tactics to get him to get rid of his old bag or even care about how he dressed.

Significant improvement.

Jimin, as we've said claims he's come to the realization friends ain't shit- the emphasis is mine. Lol.

So I guess my answer to your question is, I don't think JK is jealous necessarily when it comes to Taemin. He reacts to him the same way he reacts to Namjoon or whosoever breaches his boundaries in regards to JM.

And that to me translates as, Taemin doesn't respect JK's boundaries for whatever reason. It could be because like I said, he doesn't think JK has a place in JM's space as his boyfriend, could be because he treats JK as JM's dongsaeng and not his equal partner.

It could be JK doesn't approve of Taemin's friendship with Jimin because he expects Jm to have boundaries especially with certain people around him- I mean I wonder how many of their friends know they are a thing. Can't be all of them💀

That too can create issues with the way they handle their boundaries with either of Jikook.

Or it can be because he is jealous too. We can't know for sure.

Signed,

GOLDY

[bibbykins]

So are the seven princes the same level of crazy or are they are different levels? I feel like their on the same level some just hide it in a different way. I was trying to think about which one I would prefer (although I prefer no craziness lol) and I guess it would be Jin cause he’s at least up front about being crazy 😂

I totally agree! They all are on that same level but they express it differently! Although, the most honest ones are Jin and Yoongi, so I think I would prefer them too lmaoo! Here are some lil headcanons:

Jin:

Very proud of the lengths he'll go to for his Leopard (a lil too proud) and lives for your praise

Has the most honest relationship with you than he ever has with anyone bc you're both kinda crazy for each other

Will tell you what exactly what he plans to do to people who upset you, will maybe even ask your opinion if he’s stuck between what to do

Like that is casual dinner convo if it comes up, makes y’all one of the most intimidating couples tbh

Sometimes you even make requests such as when a professor gets too handsy or if you get jealous

He’ll poke fun at your jealousy but he’s way worse lmao

Doesn’t prefer killing, but nothing is off the table for you

Respects you a lot so lying to you isn’t even an option 

Yoongi:

He has the power to ruin lives at the drop of a hat 

You have the power to make him drop said metaphorically hat at your whim, sugar baby energy

You both control each other so easily and it’s very equal and mutual relationship 

He is also very protective

Not above hiring to kill, but will only do it if you ask bc he thinks death is too easy

Usually blackmails and puts anyone who bothers you in prison or far away in a miserable state of living 

You don't bore yourself with the details how he got rid of someone unless you really want to know

He lets you know if he’s gonna do something and for what reason before he does anything, giving you a chance to be like, “nah, don’t” but there is one exception...

If he sees you cry he basically sees red and hunts down whoever made you cry. You're his Sunshine, if you cry, someone is paying the price

Hoseok:

Sometimes, he wishes he could lie to you, but not only is he incapable, he cannot bring himself to do it

So he is just like “alright, do you want me to tell you or do you want me to only tell you if you ask?” 

After much deliberation, you’re like, “Just let me ask first.” bc same as in the fic, you’re just like some shit is above my pay grade, literally or metaphorically

Doesn’t like hiring to kill, he prefers ruining lives to make them suffer through it

V short temper when it comes to people even looking at you wrong so he doesn’t tell you when he’s gonna do anything

However, if you sense he might and tell him not to, he’ll respect your wishes or negotiate

Thinks it’s hot when you loose your temper and tell him to do whatever he wants, knowing he will definitely do something

You tell no one about the gratification you get feigning shock when a coworker tells you “so-and-so got fired and was barely able to get a job in the countryside, and he hates rural towns.” and you just say, “oh my, what a shame” with an internal smirk

Namjoon:

First things first, you both know that you know, but you also silently agreed not to talk about it most of the time

If you think about it too hard, then you feel bad(sometimes), so you just... don’t think about it

Altough, you are his alibi with no questions asked at any given time

He will do whatever he feels like he should, even gets advice from some of the other girls, mostly Leopard and Sunshine

The girls will tell you if he asked and you’ll just be like, “you guys are so silly and overprotective lmao”

Times will come when you’ll just thank him if you hear about what he “may or may not have” done and he’ll act casual but be rlly giddy internally

The closest to a regular relationship is you guys, but that’s mostly by default bc in reality y’all are codependent AT BEST

But similar to Sunshine, you also have sugar baby energy when it comes to his craziness

Jimin:

Enjoys threatening people in the name of love and is not above murder, but would never do it himself, would rather pay someone else to

Always says he hates when you question him or talk back but secretly enjoys it so he makes 0 attempt to hide his sinister tendencies from you

He just... never rlly tells you? If you ask he will, though and you’re just kinda *shrug* about it and sometimes use it to your advantage

Extremely supportive of your dreams- especially since it consists of mostly staying home and doing work there and is still trying to make you his manager

You're the only person that can tell him what to do and he'll listen most of the time

Although, he seldom respects your wishes or gives you permission to do stuff- not that it ever stops you/not that you ever ask

He has the “yes honey” yandere vibes rlly

Taehyung:

Not afraid to ruin lives for his lover and has no remorse for anyone who threatens you or what you both have

Strives to keep his darker tendencies hidden bc he wants to keep you pure, whatever that means

Supports your dreams- and is thankful they involve things he can employ you for/ things you can work from home for (although the embroidery needles make him SWEAT esp when you prick your fingers)

He would hate to think of what he would have to do if you wanted to go in a field he had no connections in, although there barely is any field of the sort with his job

Tries, usually in vain, to keep his stalker tendencies at bay, but who can blame him when you look so cute sleeping

Does his absolute best to respect your wishes.. although is not above lying to you about tampering with the situation

It's for your own good, you're too pure to understand the things a person like him has to do for your love

Jungkook:

Kind of almost a nut case, but he's your nut case since he tries to be subtle about his darker tendencies 

Is not great at it, but he doesn't go too far (in your mind) so you let it slide

Plus you're not exactly sane yourself, so it works out when you want him to put someone in their place

You're not a violent person, but he is when you need him to be, so you’ll just be like “ugh, this person tried to short me on a alter for a dress” and he’s out the door or making a phone call

Hates to lie, so never really does, just like Jimin he just doesn’t say anything unless you ask, except he tries to sugar coat it. (If you press further, he’ll crack under the pressure and be flat out) bc even when he does lie, you can tell and he knows

Not great at putting his emotions into words and is kind of a mess but is figuring out how to boyfriend and not stalker

Kind of endearing but a little frustrating at times

Seven Princes of Campus Masterlist

#yandere bts #seven princes of campus #ask #anon ask

[blockedmite]

A Warm Surprise | Abby Anderson x Reader

You go on a camping trip that ends with meeting Abby

Abby Anderson x Fem!Reader

AN: So....

When I say soon, I mean soon. lol. I guess I just didn't have too much to add after I left off. But to start off this AN right I want to thank some very important people to me.

First I want remind everyone that this fic is dedicated to @kittycat-beans​, who is an amazing writer and an even more amazing person. Their top tier Abby fics have been a huge inspiration to write again. This fic is also in honor of @shadowcrow​, who still continues to support my every last move. They are a friend that everyone deserves.(and also helped proofread)

Next, I would like to thank my proofreaders, who also happen to be my little mini family over the last week or so. I WILL destroy anyone and anything that does as much as touch a hair on their head because I love all of them so much. <3<3<3. The proofreaders are @abbysfrenchbraid​, who is the most beautiful woman other then Abby that I have ever seen. Just a straight up German goddess. Next, @abbysfirstlove​, who is the most adorable little sweet cake anyone can imagine. I will protect that smol bean with my life. Next, @jessicamparker​, who I can never take seriously. lol. She is an absolutely adorable and chill bean that everyone deserves to vibe and vape with. 

So, if that’s everyone, I’ll give you the stats on this fic now. This is a Modern AU with Abby as a lumberjack and a Fem!Reader. This is chapter 2 of 10. It’s is 1.4K words. 

Warnings:

cursing

some angst

Enjoy!

A Warm Surprise

Chapter 2: Rescued

“I really need to go get some wood.” Abby thought. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was white, it was cold, and it was miserable. 

You walked for what seemed like hours. The horrible, god-forbidden cold just would not let up. Your legs had long since adjusted to your movement but now they were fighting the cold with the rest of your body. Your arms clung to your sides and your breathing was stuttered. You couldn’t feel your fingers or toes. You swore that hypothermia was going to set in soon if you didn’t make it to your car.

Speaking of your car, where the hell was that thing, anyway? You have been walking in its general direction for what seemed like miles. It couldn’t be that far, it was just a short hike. 

“Where is it?” You thought. “Please...I can't be...I can't be….No! I am not lost. I know where I am.”

You pushed the thought of you being lost out of your head. If there was anything that shouldn't be happening now, it's you being lost. Lost out in the middle of a white, freezing blizzard. But the more you kept trying to push the thought away, the more you kept thinking about it and the more it kept making sense.

You were absolutely terrified. You had already ran out of your tent in a panic to get out of the cold. It was a very likely chance that you ran the wrong way. You had no way of checking whether or not you were going the right way either. You still couldn't see anything, so you could have been walking in a circle this entire time with no landmarks to orient yourself.

With your thoughts now on landmarks, you realized that you never passed that little stream you crossed when first finding your spot. Or went back past that huge salt rock. Or passed that huge, old tree that was split in half. 

You were in the middle of nowhere. 

You damn near screamed. There was no way you could be lost. You had to know where you were. You had to be somewhere after all, right?

You looked around in a panic. You looked for…...something. Anything. Anything that could give you a sign of where you were. You looked through the thick falling snow. You saw bare trees and bushes. You looked at the sky and saw dark grey clouds. You looked behind you and saw nothing but your own tracks being quickly covered up by the snow. You looked back in front of you to find nothing, just like before. 

You kept looking forward. Moving step by step, further into the frozen hell that awaited you. You kept moving until you saw it. You saw something moving in the snow, it was flapping around wildly in the wind.

It was bright orange and low to the ground. A tent! You had stumbled into someone else's camping site! You finally found a place to stay. Oh thank god. These people could definitely help you or let you stay. They must have some good camping equipment to stay out in this fucking weather. Now all you had to do was………

“No.” You thought.

“Oh please God. No! NOOOOO!”

You stumbled into your own camping site again. You had walked in a complete circle.

 You were lost. 

You stared at the bright orange tent flapping in the wind, making you sick. You barely saw your sleeping bag buried under the snow in front of the tent where you had left it. You could see that the snow had made its home inside of the tent’s open front. You were frozen in place and it wasn’t because of the cold.

If you were being completely honest, you wanted to die. You just wanted to lay down and let the cold overtake you. Let the white, pure snow cover up your cold, rotten body and be discovered later. You wondered how long it would take. Would the search party come after your 10-day trip was over? Maybe a week after? Months? Years? Who would even notice that you were gone? Who would even care if they noticed? There was no one and nothing for you back in Jackson. Sure as hell nothing here for you in Seattle. What was even the point anymore? 

Why were you even alive anymore?

“FUCK YOU SEATTLE!!” You thought, “If I want to die somewhere, it’s sure as hell won’t be in Seattle in the middle of the fucking woods.”

You didn’t know where this new burst of energy came from but you didn’t complain. Everything inside of you was starting to burn. Burn with rage. Burn with frustration. Burn with the passion to get the fuck out of this blizzard.

You still couldn't see anything but you were going to find your way. If that meant bumping into and rubbing every tree you could find with your numb fingers until they bleed, then so be it. You had one tree in mind anyway. That huge, old oak tree split in half. It was different from all the rest anyway. If you could find that one tree you could find your way out of these woods. 

So you reoriented yourself and set out one last time. You were as close to jogging in the snow as it would allow you. Your feet felt like heavy stones and your legs were starting to ache a little. Your arms weren’t attached to your body anymore. They were swinging by your sides, helping you thrust yourself forward through the snow. Occasionally using them as little binoculars to help see through the snow a little bit.

You jogged and jogged and jogged through the snow. You keep pushing forward. All you wanted to find was some shelter. God knew that you would have gladly fallen into a hole and stayed there, if it meant getting out of this blizzard alive. Anything would do. In fact, right now you were looking for a tree. All you needed to do was find one tree. One tree in a forest full of them. That one sign of hope. That one sign of life. 

~~~

You were running around for what seemed like hours again. 

“Not again.” You thought, “I can’t be lost again. I’m not gonna die here. Where the fuck is that tree?”

At this point, you were legit rubbing and bumping into trees. Seriously, looking up at them trying to see if you remembered it. It was clear to you that the cold was making you crazy, and now you were slowly losing your mind. You were just a crazy woman running around in a blizzard rubbing on trees. At the very least dying crazy is better than dying sane. 

But dying wasn’t an option right now. You had to find that damn tree. You kept pushing forward, albeit much slower than before. You had to be going in the right direction this time. As dreadful as coming back to your campsite was, it was helpful in pointing you in the right direction. You had to be nearing the tree eventually.

You walked and looked. You walked a little slower and looked a little harder. You were starting to lose energy quickly but your determination was still high. You were going to keep looking for that tree with the last fiber of your being. 

You were still continuing your tree rubbing when…..

“Woah!”

What the hell? Did that tree just woah at you? That's it! You were finally losing it. You were gonna go crazy and die in the middle of the woods with woahing trees. 

“What the hell? Who are you??” said the once woahing tree.

“I...I...need help-p” You said stuttering due to the cold, “Help me-e, Mr. T-Tree”

“Holy shit! How long have you been out here?”

Before you could answer, you felt the “tree” move. A hand grabbed at your back while another swapped up your feet. Next thing you knew someone, that you thought was a tree, was bridal carrying you to an unknown location.

“I have a log cabin I can take you to.” said the stranger.

Ok, scratch that. An unknown log cabin. You cursed yourself for not trying that earlier but you were kind of too busy trying not to die. Plus you happened to be walking around in circles, so what were the chances anyway. But despite everything, you were so happy that you were being carried to safety. 

You dangled lifelessly in the arms of your own personal survivor. Your body was starting to ache all over but you didn’t care. Whoever this was, you were completely ready to die in their arms.

For them to completely take you away.

“By the way, my name’s Abby.”

#abby x reader #abby anderson x reader #abigail anderson x reader #abby anderson #abigail anderson #abby tlou2 #abby tlou #tlou fanfic #abby anderson fanfic