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masksandmadness · 5 years

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I found this sitting in my drafts just as I went to turn this into my writing account. I was really invested in writing this, so if you have any feedback, please let me know!!😄

Tagging some accounts I thought might like historical Hetalia?: @stirringwinds @historicalhetaliacollective @historical-hetalian [and anybody else who wants to be tagged! (: ]

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warnings: choking, violence, mentions of war, torture, and the Vietnam War. also, Alfred isn’t a good guy in this, he’s a lot more manipulative and mean than canon, so sorry if you don’t like that kinda stuff!!

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“You’re shaking,” Arthur noted distantly that morning, a cigarette already lit in his mouth as he leaned against the balcony that morning. “Had you realised?”

Yes, Alfred had realised. He’d been firmly aware of his own trembling hands for the past few days, irate as it made him, and he’d been desperately trying to quell it for just as long. Unfortunately, unsurprisingly, his attempts were futile, to say the least. He stuck a cigarette in his own mouth, inhaling sharply and shrugging noncommittally.

“There is a war going on, in case you hadn’t realised,” he replied, with an ounce of frosty detachment as he’d lacked at the start of this whole mess, “I’m under a lot of pressure. Vietnam, and all.”

“Vietnam,” Arthur repeated, thoughtfully, staring down at the citizens mulling around below them. Alfred’s citizens. The pride hadn’t faded when calling them that, even after all these years. “Yes, I heard about your interference there. How is that going for you?”

Not as planned, Alfred wanted to say honestly, but pride kept his mouth shut, though his lips turned downwards in the same perpetual frown he seemed to always have on his face these days. The charming smile was only present on his face while making a business deal, meeting with allies, or at a world meeting.

There was a cool breeze that whispered against the back of his neck, providing a little relief in the overbearing heat, and Alfred dragged fingers through his hair, both in an attempt to cool himself down, and in agitation.

“Everything is under control.” He spoke the same words he’d been speaking to his leaders and people for the past few months, and each time he repeated it, he believed himself less and less. “The Vietcongs are losing ground and support each day. Before long, they won’t have any place else to go. They’ll have to give up.”

There was an almost uncomfortable silence, in which Arthur frowned and Alfred reflected how old Arthur seemed. Good God, when had his former mentor started getting wrinkles? As faint as they were, they lined the corners of his eyes, aging him considerably from the young body he maintained. The American wondered just how old Arthur’s human age was. It had to be late thirties, by now.

He switched his gaze from Arthur’s troubled demeanour and face to the streets below him. Alfred had always loved the sky, which was why an apartment in one of the top floors with a balcony suited him perfectly. Arthur had never been one for heights, but he nevertheless had stayed when Alfred requested – quite possibly because he had no choice, but he stayed, in any case.

“I know what you’re doing to that jungle, Alfred.” Arthur’s voice was level, rather quiet, though Alfred tensed as though he’d been spat upon. One quick glance to the older nation’s face told him that yes, Arthur definitely knew, and his own face hardened defensively.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” In contrast, Alfred kept his tone light and airy, unruffled, though he felt anything but. If Arthur’s scepticism was anything to judge off of, he wasn’t fooling either of them.

“Don’t pretend you’re a fool – it doesn’t suit you and it never will.” Arthur told him curtly, and Alfred scoffed once, staring straight ahead, not seeing the glorious weather or his buildings or his people or even his country. “Most of us nations are aware, and I’ll be frank, not many of us approve. It’s cruel and inhuman. You know of the side effects?”

Alfred’s jaw clenched, and he stubbornly kept his eyes fixed on a skyscraper straight ahead of them, blocking out Arthur’s concern and unhappiness firmly. “Yeah, I know, I get it,” he retorted, unable to prevent himself, “but it’s necessary. I’m willing to provide funds to help rebuild the jungle—“

“And the birth defects?” Arthur pressed relentlessly, unwilling to concede his point. “What of them?”

“They’re a necessary sacrifice,” Alfred bit the words out as though they were made from glass shards. “If parents are unhappy, they can move away from the chemicals we’re spraying, it’s simple as that.”

“And while we’re on the subject of Vietnam,” the Briton continued, a mocking note slipping in to his voice that made Alfred want to strangle him, “how is Operation Phoenix coming along? Nicely, I expect?”

Alfred froze dead.

Images of the operation flashed in front of his mind, capturing his senses – the smell of rotting flesh, the screams of those that were under interrogation, red-raw wrists from the too-tight shackles, the grotesque shapes the victims were left in after their interrogation, the whispers, the rumours of what really went on in those rooms, oh god please no make it stopmakeitstop—

“How did you find out?” Alfred’s voice hitched uncertainly, turning towards Arthur, and Arthur’s eyes gleamed his satisfaction at such a reaction where his face stayed impassive. “Who told you?”

“Nobody needed to tell me,” Arthur retorted briskly. “I’m an Empire, Alfred. Do you really think I haven’t had my own experiences with torture?”

No, Alfred wasn’t so naive. Most, if not all nations had been tortured at some point. He himself had been during his Civil War, tortured for information about his twin Confederacy, by his own Unionists. He remembered the pain, the hoarse screams, the deep seated desperation that somebody would save him, someone, anyone—

And somebody had saved him, Alfred remembered, but not the person he’d expected to, not at all.

“It wasn’t that hard to figure out,” Arthur continued, seemingly oblivious to his former protege’s inner turmoil. “You’re hardly the most subtle person I know. Do you really think I don’t have my own men investigating?”

They both knew what he really meant. Keeping an eye to make sure Alfred didn’t destroy anything more than he already had. Spying, in other words, but Alfred knew he couldn’t handle the word being spoke aloud. The fifties and sixties hadn’t been kind to him, McCarthyism running rampant in his cities and his own head, and his paranoia had been getting the better of him. Especially after realising how little Vietnam actually wanted his help.

Whatever.

Alfred turned to Arthur, wary and tense. “You won’t tell anyone,” he ordered, voice low. “You can’t. If word of this gets out—“

“You lose your status as the world’s golden boy, I know,” Arthur interrupted tonelessly. “Reputation, that’s what you have to lose. And a war, I suppose, though you’re losing that spectacularly on your own, without my interference.”

“Arthur,” Alfred snapped, stepping towards him, none of his prior calmness about him now. “I need you to promise me that you won’t reveal what you know.”

“And why should I?” Arthur asked heatedly, stiffening upon realising how close Alfred was, but continuing on regardless. “There is no need for you to be doing that to those people, Alfred. Pull out of Vietnam, realise your efforts are neither wanted nor appreciated, and focus on Russia, your own damn country, whatever. Don’t let yourself get so deep into this—”

Alfred cut him off by shoving his former mentor against the wall, face dark, warning. Arthur’s eyes widened, minutely, desperately trying to get Alfred off his throat while maintaining his composure.

“Alfred—”

“You promise me now,” Alfred said, softly, not an inch of mercy over his usually sunny face, “or I swear to God, I will bring your little island crashing and burning to the ground. I will kill your people and start fires in your cities and make what Vietnam must be going through seem like a dream come true. So let me hear your promises, old man.”

“I promise!” Arthur gasped, fear flickering in his eyes, but managing to stay on his feet and mostly upright when Alfred let him go. Closing his eyes, and taking a breath, the young American turned away briefly, forcing a calm mask back on to hide his paranoia.

“Good,” he murmured, straightening his shoulders, and he could feel Arthur’s stare boring into his back, burning holes in his suit, but didn’t turn around. “Then we have nothing more to discuss. Unless you’d like to stay for dinner. Then I gotta get back to Washington. Business to take care of, you know how it is.”

Arthur didn’t reply, and Alfred took that as a negative, though desperately hoped he hadn’t just burned a bridge with one of his only true allies. He needed Arthur, as much as he needed his silence... After all this, after Vietnam, after this war between him and Ivan, he could apologise, explain himself. But he couldn’t have news of what he’d done, what he was doing and what he would continue to do, spreading.

“There’s something not right with you, America,” Arthur told him, steel in his voice, but Alfred could detect concern in there, and tangible fear, too. “This war has changed you.”

“Or maybe I’ve always been like this, and you always underestimated me too much to notice,” Alfred returned defensively, finally spinning around to face the Brit. Arthur returned his gaze, evenly. There was sadness in it.

“Maybe I have,” the elder said, and Alfred felt something between them shift, irreversibly. “Goodbye, America.”

Goodbye. It was never goodbye between nations; only “see you later” or “bye for now” because nations were bound to run into each other a few times at some point in the century.

“Bye,” he replied, tentatively, and watched as Arthur left the room, dishevelled and with the same exhaustion Alfred felt deep in his bones. Sighing, and slumping down with his head in his hands the minute Arthur was out of sight, the younger wondered if he was really doing the right thing.

Not that it mattered. He would win this war, and he would win the war against Russia, because he had no other choice, not because it was right or good.

The next time he saw Arthur was in 1975, at the gathering after the declaration of Vietnam’s victory. Alfred was too exhausted and beaten down and yes, he’d admit it, too drunk, to properly speak, but the look Arthur shot him spoke volumes in itself.

Sympathy, wariness, tiredness. A bitter “I told you so” that Alfred really didn’t need at that present moment.

But word of Operation Phoenix wasn’t spread. Alfred counted that as a big victory.

He only wished it and he didn’t feel so hollow as a result.

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twracehorse · 5 years

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Cringing at my own videos

Training Videos Edition!

I got bored, needed motivation to start editing, went back to take a look at my older videos, and now I judge and cringe at them because that’s a given at this stage

Under the cut to keep your dash shorter :3

Determined Horse Training, the title I came up with to be a little unique. I obviously couldn’t use something akin to Northena’s “Training Is Fun...Right?” and I wanted to give it a proper title knowing this would be a series of videos. I thought, and thought, and came up with the title after thinking of Undertale and how you are filled with determination in the game. “I am filled with determination to train these horses!” is what I thought and so the title of the series became that!

I use // as a way to separate different topics I’m talking about

Brave Rebel- First off...the thumbnail. He was originally themed sort of after Nathan Drake from Uncharted, since I was into that series at the time. So the map was, you know, for the treasure hunting. But I didn’t want to stretch the map to fit and somehow decided that a brown background was a good idea?? // AH THE CLOTHES! THE NECK!! AHHH GATORADE OCEAN BLEHH. // Oh yeah I have a spelling error in the video “Let’s go defeat this traning day!”. // Been training with Sage from the start of the series. I wonder how many fails of their’s I’ve caught XD // Ah the rocks, the rocks that I caught Sage stumbling out of in a later training video. // Let’s not forget the double mouse thing going on that makes its appearance in many videos before I figured out to click off of the web pages (which had a music playlist going while training). // Omg there’s someone with the club name The Babies standing nearby when I turn in the final race. // Low-key still love this horse. He was my first true Soul Steed before we were designated to our starter. I don’t take him out much, the difference in horse animations from new to old is getting bigger and for dynamic photos, it just doesn’t look good ( @~@)

Cool Hero- The horse based off of Markiplier back when he had red hair. I also uploaded the video on his birthday! // The song choice....I mean it fits the theme, otherwise I’d pick a better song. // The mini references I’m still low-key proud of. // There’s quite the amount of gliding pons in this video and some horror texture pons. // I obviously had to max Markimoo at the observatory! // I also mimicked Mark’s outros where an image is boomeranging. It took a couple tries with my friend in the background, but it was worth it!

Violet Mystery- I hope when I introduced her as “The winner of the Jorvik Wild horse competition” I mean, she was the first coat to be picked. Back when it was only one horse coat is being made. They added the top two coats afterwards. // Oh yeah the character’s whole head would move to the side to keep eye contact with the camera. // It’s so weird to think that I caught a bit of footage of Swifty just before meeting her. Then again I remember NOT editing this training video until months later and uploaded it in September. Mind you that I got Cool Hero and Violet Mystery at the same time and Cool Hero’s video was out in June...oops. // Ironic that I have the pandoric cracks around when the horse is based off them. // People running up from the riding arena, ah the fog glitch that would happen when you left your horse in the riding area, ran all the way to the dino valley elevator, took it, and there was no fog in the valley!

Megalove- Ah the first Undertale horse! I mean technically still the only Undertale themed horse I have, but I do have others planned. Haven’t gotten them yet and some plans changed. // The thumbnail....why did I make the stickers super tiny?? // Finally changed Elsa’s hairstyle to the ponytail I still wear to this day. We need updated ponytails with side bangs! I know we have the awesome braided ponytail in Mistfall, but there’s too much forehead! // Also the first training footage with the meet up....was 4 hours long. This was back when I recorded all stages of training and went through the footage in real time....I’m glad I changed strategy. // Can’t remember if crashing into a jump and the jump of the music timed at the same point was on purpose or if it was editing magic. // Oof cringing that I put comic sans as Sans “talking” in the video nnngghhhhh! // Ah my old club name Royal Ambassadors. I gave that club over to my side account Chiara Monsterhope for obvious reasons. // Annoying Dog in the credits, I still love that

Lucky Hero- I’m still proud that I came up with his nickname Vien short of Vienna where the famous riding school is. He, along with Brave Rebel, are my top horses. Please get an update eventually boys! // Finally Mac users had clear water! I was so happy over this you do not understand XD // Warriors by Imagine Dragons fits this horse, but quite a pain when I got Dark Warrior and didn’t want repeating songs. // Oh yeah early on, the Lipizzaners had a weird reflective tail glitch going on. // Vien was the first horse of mine that I got the day of release, bright and early in the morning! // I love how in the face of danger, an approaching bull dozer, I just stare at it. It wasn’t even a “oh no I should get out of the way” and instead was “huh that’s a thing”. // ALLY CHUM! I forgot that was a nickname to good friend!

Grey Ghost- OH BOY HERE WE GO!! Honestly my favorite training video. It was so much fun to edit with the music and the Halloween stickers hidden around the screen! Despite waking up at 5am to train for that aesthetic™. // Okay but that mushroom with the dark green sign did legit give me a spook. My body froze for a second and then I remembered that Slenderman doesn’t exist in Star Stable XD. // Ngl two of the stickers are hard to see cause of their surroundings. // GALLOPER THOMPSON MY MAN! Honestly I waited till midnight for him to be in Goldenleaf forest, just to see what would happen if you were racing and he caught you. By the gods of editing magic, the song was at a good point that fits perfectly with that scene. // For the scarecrow race I did actually take two different takes. I failed the first one and when I was editing I noticed that the two runs looked similar. So I put the first part of run 1 and cut before I failed and then put the remaining of the race with run 2. Looks almost seamless!

Silent Promise- My favorite mare in my stable! She ends up being my AoT cosplay photo horse...until I get the actual themed horse XP. // Shadows were a little glitchy at first. // Why am I using Rud instead of Rude. Like I know why cause that’s how we got around the filter, but I didn’t need to put it like that in the video. It’s like back in my WolfQuest days where I learned to use Cuz as a short version of Cause and it bled into my text vocab. // The witch bombs...I wanted to make it dramatic, but in hindsight it’s just tasteless really. Also to note that the sound which was fine before uploading, got more rough once it was on YouTube

Small Potential- Real cringe theme here, Hetalia. It was fun while watching and all that, but since then I’ve seen some well done anime! Growth! // I love the nickname Finny. Not too sure if I want to keep this pony or not, sadly. // The Christmas remix song is because I had no other ideas XD

Brave Eagle- Oh this is another slight cringe theme. Even more cringe is the fact that I had to re-upload this training video since it got blocked all over the world! due to the Hamilton musical songs. So I....had to layer over the songs with other songs....it’s a whole mess and was a whole pain since I had to re-edit the sound effects. // I’m proud of the thumbnail though....that’s it

Winter Dust- Why did I make the “there’s a new app with these foals you can train” with the dramatic music? // I think because I had less levels to train, I tried filling that space with “cool looking shots”. // Ah, yes, my How To Get Over A Jump wikipedia step by step

Hollow Phantom- Had to bring a creepy vibe even though it was February. So he’s like a Halloween not Halloween horse. // Can you believe that I found the main song from a Haikyuu!! crack video? XD. // That zoom on the pony surrounded by magic shires was weird. We’re saying “SO TINY” but the clip was so short it was done and over without much sense. // Mmm that slight irritation that the music and clip didn’t match with the drop. // Tried to blend the music together with itself....it’s obvious. // Of course had to max the Galloper horse where I first met the phantom himself

North Guardian- I wanna talk about the thumbnail....that background...is literally just the horse’s hindquarters. I wanted something mossy since the horse is sort of based off of Pelagia from Shadow of the Colossus. I couldn’t find good enough backgrounds, so I used the horse itself. // Again that urge to want to make the clip and music match but ahhh

Lucky Lucky- Still wish I could name this horse Gold Luck or something. // I think one of the camera turns during a race was just to show off the rainbow nearby. // Ahh! back when we could say “demon” in the chat. // Hmm instead of letting the clip run, I could’ve just cut to Reed calling the askew fence “a disgrace”. // Text was onscreen for just too long. // Trying to do the riding arena jumps with a good camera angle. But at that point, the camera kept moving and wouldn’t hold still. I’m glad it’s better now. Maybe I’ll try it again with a future horse. // Huh, forgot to add sound effects when I hit something on the last race

Silent Surprise- Cause I had to let the people know that I bought the horse after watching the Belmont. // AH STILL THE NECK! // 2 minutes in and we haven’t even gotten to the actual training yet. // Another day, another SSO glitch, this time it’s shadow rocks. // Oop missed a sound effect

Hot Spot- THE MUSTACHE! // I forgot I put a filter over the video to give it an old timey look. I should do more like that if it’s in theme. // Of course I had to have The Wanted be playing with this song since it’s old west sounding. // What was the purpose of editing the scarecrow race like that? XD. // Random running clip. // Walking the whole bobcat race would be nice if I didn’t keep moving the camera

Pumpkin Candy- As much as I love my Halloween horses, this training video isn’t up to the standards that the first Halloween training video set up. It’s still got Halloween themed music, it’s still got stickers hidden in the video, but it doesn’t feel the same. // Having text be their default instead of making them the same agh. // The spooky filter I overlayed the clips with changes at times. Would be nice if it stayed consistent

Dragon Dawn- Hmm now that I have more songs to choose from (getting into another artist as much as I did with The Wanted), I would have another song playing to fit the horse better. Maybe Euphoria or Mikrokosmos. Oh well those will be for future horses eventually! // Didn’t drop with the music...disappointed

Thunder Spirit- The horse that trains through three months. You can easily tell by the Valentine race, the rainbows of March, and April Fools. // Man I really need to work on making the text not be so BIG. // The first rainbow race had lots of sound effects. After that one I was just like “yeah not doing that again”

Sun Chaser- Eh the slowed down music is not the best idea. But I think it was also an intro to a remix of the song. So it was only so long and I had a bit to say for the intro of the horse. // The second clip of the mysterious Icelandic cryptid you can’t see them once it zooms in....annoying. // Too much of a slow build up with another cryptid spotting. // Also using the same sound but slower after just using it...smooth (not). // You know the very last clip of the horse as he’s turning around on the beach? Yeah that’s the exact moment I did the intro for the horse XD

Dragon Warrior- The contrast between me and Sage’s bantering vs the sadder song (I found the song because of a Zeno AMV) well it’s kinda weird having laughs and then sad melody. // YouTube again ruins the quality of the mic as it sounds fuzzier than it was pre-uploaded. // Low-key recording voices was fun aside from having to make sure the clips matched the voices and clicking of the mouse. // I’m still annoyed I couldn’t find the perfect snoring sound effect when Sage’s Connemara is sleeping and starts gliding away

Smoke Mirror- A little too much of a pause between text in the intro. // I love how I’m wearing a Halloween shirt because no other shirt matched with the blue of the hat except for the dress it came with THAT I GOT RID OF!

Obsidian Mystery- I love the thumbnail for her training video. It’s so spooky and cool! Favorite thumbnail of the entire series right there. // Ironic that with the three Halloween horses I’ve had. The two with the upbeat music are the ones where Galloper was present that year. The one where Galloper was missing that October, the music was softer, generic Halloween music. Not intentional, but it works. Though the first Halloween training video still gets the trick-or-treats because it has nostalgic music. // Some text isn’t easily visible

Dark Warrior- The horse I wish I could name Secret Warrior cause that would make SO MUCH MORE SENSE than Dark Warrior, but here we are. // Since Warriors by Imagine Dragons was in a previous training video, I had to search for another song to fit the horse. I literally went through those anime character theme song videos to find one! That was a terrible jump cut of the song

Ember Flame- Coming Soon

#Star Stable #Star Stable Online #SSO

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scarlettlillies · 6 years

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Hetalia- Beautiful Goodbyes: Ch.5 (EstIce)

(You can read from the beginning here)

(Ao3 Version)

I can't believe it took a year to finish this. 2017 was not very forgiving when it came to free time and 2018 is not really any better. This chapter didn't fully form to the way I wanted but I'm satisfied that it's good enough to post. Still, I hope you enjoy this chapter! For those of you new to this fic, this is a 1920s human AU.

Name Legend: Eduard (Olev) - APH Estonia Eyvindur - APH Iceland Timo - APH Finland Heino - OC

The skies changed over so quickly. Eyvindur rushed to the living room windows and shut them fanatically. The rain was such a surprise that they hadn't considered a “Plan B” when Eduard showed up out of the kitchen with a picnic basket in his hands. “What a shame,” Eyvindur sighed. “To think we spent our whole morning preparing all that food for nothing.” “I wouldn't say that,” Eduard said cheerfully. “We'll just have a picnic indoors then. Besides, we'll still have to head out into the rain anyway. I need some ingredients for dinner tonight.” “I'll help then.”

The two men laid out a picnic in the living room and enjoyed a hardy meal with potato and pasta salads and BLT sandwiches. Desserts were chocolate and vanilla cupcakes made the night before. Eduard was sure to have the radio on as they ate. Friday afternoons were when they played some of new brass and jazz music currently popular in the clubs. When they were finished, Eyvindur helped Eduard clean up and threw the leftovers inside the ice box. They could use the rest of the salads for tonight as a side dish.

Though the rain didn't look like it was letting up any time soon, it had been reduced down to a drizzle and it was enough for Eduard to decide to head out for some grocery shopping. Eyvindur was quick to follow him to the door, the two of them changing out of their matching slippers and into their outdoor shoes, raincoats, and all. Eduard grabbed his favourite umbrella, the one with a large blue plaid pattern on it, while Eyvindur had a hold of a dark brown wicker basket. They wasted no time running to the car and headed towards the city.

Their usual routine was to park within the core and browse around the markets. But with the weather being unpredictable as it was, Eduard decided to find a spot closer to the shops he needed to visit. He wasn't lucky however and found himself parking far from the shopping core. No worries, he said to himself, they'd just do what they could and take shelter if they needed to.

Eduard and Eyvindur always did their errands together. Eyvindur often helped him pick out the freshest vegetables as he seemed to have a better eye for it than Eduard did. Eyvindur's opinion mattered to Eduard and it made his efforts worth the while. When Eyvindur worked for his previous employer, he accompanied her during her shopping runs but she always seemed to have an opinion of some sort (often negative) about the way he did certain things. Eduard was not like that at all. He was always content to join him on days like today.

Eyvindur had been living with Eduard for the last four months. In the weeks that followed his first night at Eduard's home, he immediately hit the streets for work so he could pay for his portion of the bills. Despite Eduard saying it wasn't necessary, the man quickly discovered how stubborn Eyvindur could be and no longer made a fuss over it. He was fortunate enough to land several different kinds of jobs, however he proved to be an ill-proper fit. Eyvindur was simply not cut out for hard labour. He was smaller and not as well built than many of the men who worked in the shipyards and factories. Customer service jobs didn't fair much better as he was rather shy and could easily get short-tempered with certain customers. He rapidly went through five jobs within two months.

But Eyvindur was in a happier spot now; he had found part-time work at one of the library branches in the downtown core. On the days Eyvindur needed to work, Eduard would drive him back and forth between the city and their home in the countryside. Eyvindur assisted with all kinds of tasks like processing returns, restocking the shelves, and working the front desk. The thought of working another service job had him feeling anxious during his first week but he quickly discovered the people weren’t as bad as he thought they were going to be, as he dealt with mostly young families and students just like he once was. His book recommendations proved to be highly popular too, as well as his charming appearance. Young women would occasionally flirt with him but their words would fly over Eyvindur’s head. Eduard had caught a few of those moments as he waited for the boy’s shift to end and always had a good laugh out of Eyvindur’s confusion. With a mix of vegetables, some herbs, eggs, and salmon, their shopping was complete and it was time to head back home. Eduard was worried that Eyvindur was carrying too much as he was quick to take notice that the man was often swapping the basket between both his hands. But Eyvindur insisted that he was doing just fine. Turning the corner, the market was still buzzing with so much traffic. Each shop on the block was different and had a unique character to them. One was bright and open selling various flowers while the neighbouring shop appeared dark and unwelcoming with a large poster advertising fortune telling for one dollar. It felt eerily out of place with its other neighbouring shop, a butcher, who they normally get their meat from. But out of all the shops on the block, only one caught Eyvindur’s eye. Sandwiched between a small pub-style restaurant and a furniture store, the building was empty with a sign on the door saying ‘For Sale’ with a name of a real estate agent and their phone number. There was somewhat of an attempt to cover up the windows but the brown paper was gradually falling off. It allowed Eyvindur to grab a peek inside. However, there wasn’t much to see with the exception of some chairs and a desk. Eduard hadn’t noticed that Eyvindur had vanished from his sight until he realized the man was no longer responding to his questions.

“Eyvindur!” Eduard called out as he ran towards him. “Is something wrong?”

“Huh?” Eyvindur was a little dazed, not even noticing he was drenched from the rain. “Oh, it’s nothing. Don’t worry about it.” he replied flatly as he walked away and Eduard followed him closely. But he can’t get the building out of his head as he turned his head once more to grab another quick look before he turned his focus back to what was in front of him.

“You seem entranced by that empty shop,” Eduard said.

“Kind of. It seems odd that place is abandoned considering how busy the area is. Do you know what was there before?”

“Yes, that was a show repair shop ran by a pair of German brothers. We’ve been there before, about four months ago, when you just started living with me—remember?”

Oh right, that shop, Eyvindur recalled. His shoes were in rough shape when he had arrived to Eduard’s home and only lasted another week before the back end of his left shoe had opened up. “Yes, I remember those two.”

“I was always impressed by their work. The older brother got on my nerves many times but the younger one was always a pleasure to chat with. I wonder what happened to them?”

The conversation went cold and they retraced their steps back to their vehicle. But the building had stuck with Eyvindur and the feeling couldn’t be washed away. There was something about the place that made him want to go back.

“Eyvindur, does he have the scores ready?”

“Yes, but he looks nervous though.”

“It’s understandable. It’s his first exam,” Eduard said as he shut a small book with musical scores inside and rose from his chair. He joined Eyvindur who stood behind a young boy, who looked no more than ten years old, and ordered him to play the notes seen on the sheet in from of him. The tune is a basic children’s song and he played it perfectly, albeit very slowly.

“Nicely done. But try to pick up your pace.” Eyvindur instructed. “Let’s move on to the next song.”

The boy changed the sheet and it was another children’s song. Just as before, he plays it perfectly.

“Good, you’ve picked up your speed. Next song please,” Eduard said.

The next song was a little more challenging. They had moved away from children’s song to famous composers. The song of choice was Debussy’s Clair de Lune. When the boy begun the piece, it had started off nicely but with noticeable pauses in between some notes, it was clear he was beginning to struggle.

It was then a loud and jarring note echoed in the room and the boy froze in fear. Eduard however didn’t appear to be fazed by it and urged to keep going.

“It’s alright. Just keep playing.”

He did as he was told and he was slowly redeeming himself. Eyvindur was carrying a clipboard and jotting down notes as the exam was taking place. Eyvindur found his eyes wandering towards Eduard and caught a glimpse of a sweet smile as he praised the boy for not messing up a difficult note. Eyvindur quickly looked away and tried to stay concentrated on the performance in front of him. Now was not the time to be focusing on the looks of his friend and business partner.

Even though his heart really wanted to.

Eduard had nearly finished putting away all the dishes when the sounds of a loud knock made him jump.

“Who could that be at this hour?”

But when Eduard turned and found himself staring at the calendar hanging by the entrance to the dining room, he immediately knew who it was. He anxiously walked through the dining room and towards the door. But before he answered, he took a peak inside the living room and saw Eyvindur sleeping peacefully on the sofa. He breathed a sigh of relief and slowly opened the door. Eduard was greeted to a well-dressed man with short blond hair and a round face. He was much shorter than he was, bore a sweet and soft appearance, and spoke with a heavy Finnish accent.

“Good evening Olev,” he smiled. “May I come in?”

Before Eduard could answer, the man stepped in and he quietly repeated the words “No” and Eduard pushed him back. It was then the man saw Eyvindur sleeping on the sofa and his soft expression was quickly replaced with a dark glare.

“Outside. Now.”

The two of them stood on the door step and Eduard quietly shut the door behind so he wouldn’t wake Eyvindur up.

“Why is he still here?”

Eduard sighed, “I told you Timo, he’s living with me right now.”

“You’re supposed to be undercover until all this blows over! That means no job, no friends, no nothing.”

“I understand that but I couldn’t leave him to fend for himself. Besides—”

There was a long and lengthy pause but Eduard struggled to find the words of what he wanted to say. Not that Timo needed it. He knew Eduard long enough that he knew exactly what was on his mind.

“Eduard,” Timo said as he placed his hand on Eduard’s shoulder. He was surprised to hear Timo call him by his real name. “I understand that you’re lonely. It’s not easy being in the situation you’re in now. But you’re on a watch list and all it takes is one slip-up to put you on the first trip back to Tallinn. We asked this of you because we only want to protect you. You understand that right?”

Eduard nodded and gave Timo a faint smile, “Yes, I do—and I’m grateful for everything you and Heino have done for me so far.”

Timo reached inside his handbag and pulled out a thick white envelope. He handed it to Eduard and he took a peak inside. It was overflowing with cash with various denominations of bills.

“I’m sure this will hold you over for a while?”

“Yes, this is perfect. Thank you,” Eduard replied as his stuffed the envelope inside his vest.

Timo closed up the handbag and tipped his hat towards Eduard. “Alright I’ll take my leave then. I’ll be back in a few weeks with some more cash for you. Don’t blow it all in one place.”

Timo’s tone was playful in nature and it got Eduard smiling as his old self again. The two shared their goodbyes and Eduard quickly re-entered the home quietly. He was surprised to hear the piano playing a soft melody and he quickly realized that Eyvindur was up for his evening nap.

“Eduard, is that you?”

Eduard quickly grew anxious but he somehow managed to retain a cool and calm tone with Eyvindur.

“Yes, I’ll be with you in a second. I just need a moment to wash my hands.”

Quick on his feet, he rushed to the bedroom and stuffed the envelope of money underneath his mattress and tidying up the sheets to give the appearance that nothing had been touched. He then followed through on his words and watched his hands with the new soap he bought in the market a few days ago. The soap had a pleasant smell of lavender and loved the feel of it against his skin. Feeling a little more comfortable, he joined Eyvindur in the living room and took a seat next to him on the bench.

“Was someone outside? I heard you shutting the door earlier.”

“Just a lost man,” Eduard lied. “He got the wrong address so I gave him a hand with his map.”

“I see,” his voiced trailed off. Eduard felt guilty each time he had to lie. He’d always tell himself that it would get easier with time but the sharp sensation in his chest never seemed to fade away. He tried to ignore the feeling but it was becoming increasingly difficult and exhausting trying to keep up with this false life he was forced to have built up for himself.

“Is something wrong?” Eyvindur asked.

Eduard looked at him oddly before shaking his head, “No, no, I’m fine. Just a little tired.” Eduard said with a reassuring grin. He quickly tried to change the subject and the focus on music was an easy target.

“That music, it’s Clair de Lune that you‘re playing isn‘t?”

“You have a good ear Eduard,” Eyvindur replied as he continued playing the melody. “I had a dream just now that we were teachers and we were watching this child play this song. I felt a little inspired.”

Eduard chuckled, “That sounds like a wonderful dream. I wish something like that could be real. I always wanted to be a teacher.”

In a move that surprised Eduard, Eyvindur had cut off the tune but his fingers remained frozen at the keys. Eyvindur appeared almost expressionless leaving Eduard to wonder if what he had said upset him.

“Did I say something wrong? I’m sorry if I did.”

It had felt like minutes had passed before Eyvindur had finally spoken up to him. He moved his hands away from the keys and placed him against his thighs. Eduard had watched a weak and melancholic smile appear on the boy’s face as he appeared in almost a daze.

“No you’re good. I was just thinking the same thing.” Eyvindur replied. “I wanted that dream to be real too.”

Well, most of it, Eyvindur had replied to himself. He quietly pushed away the scene that found itself on loop since he awoke from his nap: the part where he found himself staring at Eduard in a more enamoured light. The idea baffled Eyvindur to no end. He had never though of Eduard as anything more than a friend—a person who saved him in a time of need. It was probably time to cut back a bit on the romance novels and poetry. At the end of the night, it was the only logical explanation Eyvindur could come to.

Yes, they were nothing more than friends.

And that’s all that they ever will be.

#hwdwriters #APH Estonia #APH Iceland #APH Finland #EstIce #hetalia #Lilly's Writings

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constupidity · 6 years

Text

Submit Anon: Why I Left the Hetalia Fandom

Be forwarned, this tale is a long one. Sorry if this story is all over the place. If any readers recognize these people, do not go after them. Real names will not be used in this story, so we’ll call these “Hetalians” in question:

*”Ludwig”, a young woman who Oliver had/has feelings for.

*”Oliver”, the star of this tale, and the ringleader of a cosplay group.

*”Matthew”, the oldest member of the cosplay group, and the only other male besides me. We were very briefly a thing.

*”Feli”, me, the one who had to put up with all this. I’m autistic, and have some sensory issues; I also don’t usually catch typical “cues” right away.

*”Francis”, and “Kiku”, two of Oliver’s sympathizers, friends, and members of her group.

*”Tino”, a Finland cosplayer who honestly was kind of bossy.

I first met these Hetalians when I first started out cosplaying. It was the Saturday of a certain con that I met Ludwig, who, while an attractive woman, I only saw as a friend (remember this as we go on).

We chatted on Tumblr for awhile, and one day she asked if I was going to the Hetalia Day meetup that year. Not knowing about it until then, I said yes! Because of course I wanted to expand my circle of friends, and if these would-be friends have the same interests as me, then that makes it a hundred times easier.

So the day of the meetup came, and so far, everything was fine. Ludwig came about an hour after I did, and unbeknownst to me, and brought a friend of hers along. This is how I met Oliver.

(Quick side note before we continue: I’m the type of person, who even non-romantically, if I’m comfortable enough with a person, I hug, hold hands, etc. willingly, as I otherwise don’t particularly care to touch other people.)

So Ludwig and I head from one pavilion to the other (the meetup was at a rather large park), and as we’re walking, holding hands as we do, we suddenly hear this girl yell at us, and despite being nearly a foot shorter than me (I’m 5’7”, she was like 4’8”, I think?) nearly pulled me to the ground, with such force that I nearly did lose my balance! Now I’m not the assertive type at all, nor did I really understand at the time why Oliver did that to begin with, so I back off a little for the time being.

In fact, I nearly forget about the incident until almost a year later, when Oliver volunteered to pick me up to take me to A-Fest, since I couldn’t (and still can’t OTL) drive, and get me to my hotel. We have somewhat of a decent conversation on the way there. Mostly about other cons we’ve been to previously. Oliver also brought up about Ludwig and how “she was the best thing to ever happen to [her]”. And suddenly her behavior at the meetup made sense to me. Or, it sort of did, I would end up needing a few more hints that came when we picked up Ludwig so we could all go get our badges together, and so I could get checked into the hotel I was staying at.

So among all other things I had with me, a video camera was one of them, because I wanted to (and would still like to) try out the whole “vloging” thing. As soon as Ludwig is in the shot, however, Oliver snaps at me saying “Don’t film my woman!”

I was taken aback, because since when was she your woman? It was established prior to picking her up that Ludwig is only interested in men (cis men, specifically), and that she already had a boyfriend. And there was certainly no polygamy involved. Yet, this whole thing was still going over my head.

Anyway, I get checked in, and even though I booked the hotel room, Tino, who I was unfortunately rooming with, starts acting like she’s the boss. She snapped at me when I didn’t look her in the eyes, even though that’s something I’m not comfortable with (eye contact is very distracting to me), she wouldn’t let me go to sleep until four in the morning, and that was only because I had started shaking and crying from behind so sleep deprived. And because she prioritized con so much, she barely let me eat, or bathe, or brush my teeth. Except maybe one time each, each day? If even that? And despite bringing four characters to cosplay, she only allowed me to wear one! One character, two outfits, the whole con! And she forced me to go to the rave with her; I don’t go to raves, or as I like to call them “sensory overload imminent”, so just imagine how well that went…

There was an incident where I had accidentally left my video camera and my mom’s camera that I was borrowing at the Hetalia photo shoot location; I did get them back a day later (thank you whoever dropped them off at lost and found!), but at the time, I was really upset about it, and Tino wouldn’t let me go look for them, and I ended up having a meltdown because of that, and from being bossed around, and from being so sleep deprived. Did she care? Only because she wanted to get back to con going! Hell, a random passerby was more concerned than she was!

Neglecting her health bit her in the ass on the last day of con, however, as she caught con plague. I don’t wanna say that she had it coming, but she did. And when my shenanigans with her ended, in came Matthew.

Now, at this point, I barely knew him from online, along with past cons and meet ups, but I soon found myself spending Saturdays with him. From there, we became fast friends over the course of a year. He got me into a few other anime titles as well, yet when I tried to get him into my favorite games (since I do mostly prefer video games over anime), he wouldn’t have any of it. He even called Kirby “a video game for babies” once when I wore my Kirby t-shirt!

(Also, funny thing: even though he’s older than me, and owns every Nintendo console, he can’t get the Koopalings’ namesakes correct! That’s like, Nintendo 101 stuff, too!)

Despite this, I somehow managed to develop feelings for him (and I still don’t know why). We went on, maybe three dates at most, before calling it quits.

And Matthew, if you are reading this: Yes, I will admit I was very immature then. I will also admit that arousal is an emotion that I am not 100% familiar with. It was a very confusing mess I should have left you out of. In those regards, I apologize for giving you any unnecessary stress. That is all I will apologize for.

While that whole tangent with Matthew was going on, Oliver decided to start an Another Color Hetalia (better known as 2P) cosplay group, and roped as many of us in as possible. Even though I was assigned a character, I never even got around to starting on the costume, which was for the better really.

It was during this, I learned once and for all that Oliver thought I was trying to steal Ludwig. At Hetalia Day 2014, we were all there, but when I went up to Ludwig to try and say hello to her, some other Hetalians, who I presume were some of Oliver’s cronies, stopped me from going up to her.

“I just want to say ‘hi’!” I said.

“Are you sure about that, Feli?” one of them asked. I just walked away totally confused, wondering what I said or did. I reached two conclusions after the meetup:

1. Oliver must not really like me that much. 2. She thinks I’m trying to steal away Ludwig, even though I have no reason to.

I unfriend her online not long after, but I was still a part of the cosplay group. For some reason.

Anyway, in November that year, there was yet another cosplay meet up I wanted to go to. However, there was no way I could get there myself, as my mom, who would normally take me to these things, would be working on that day. So I ask Francis if she, or anyone else going, could come and get me that day. I ask her at least twice, and she completely ignored me. The day of the meetup comes and goes, and I end up missing it. I told Francis it was mean of her to ignore me, and some friend she was to just forget about one of her friends (in summary; I forget the exact words I used), and unfriended her.

The next day, Oliver messaged me, telling to “say [I’m] sorry to Francis.”…Except Francis was the one at fault, not me?? I never apologize, since she deserved what I said.

One day on Facebook, our cosplay group (yes, I was still somehow a member!) was debating on having an Ask-a-2P Panel, and which con to have it at (since each of our 2015 con schedules were different all around). The main concern was having everyone at the same place at the same time. I took this problem seriously, and decided to make a suggestion.

Now, you know how in theater, every actor has an understudy (aka, a ‘back-up’ actor of sorts to practice alongside the main actor, in the case they need to fill in)? I thought, since Hetalia is a popular cosplay, especially this AU in particular, finding understudies wouldn’t be a problem at all. Plus, it would guarantee we would always have a complete set! That’s how I made sense of it.

Now, I didn’t expect everyone to agree, but it was still an idea worth keeping in mind, at least. Evidently, Oliver didn’t think so. She snapped at me for even thinking of such an idea and was all “don’t ever say again!” and I’m like Bitch, chill out. It was just a suggestion!

I forget about the incident for awhile until 2015, and Ikkicon both come along. I’m waiting in line with Matthew for our badges, when he says it.

“Feli, apologize to Oliver when you see her. ‘Cause that wasn’t cool. This panel/group is like her baby!”

Oh my lord. It was just a freaking suggestion. It didn’t help I was already irritable with other things going on during that time. Now they are going to dump this on me, too? It took all my self control not to snap!

And after that con, I finally ended up leaving the cosplay group. Not because I hadn’t started on my costume, or because of my con schedule, but because I disagreed with Kiku on a headcanon.

Yeah.

Because I didn’t agree with everyone else on some stupid headcanon, nearly everyone in the chat (sans anyone who was offline at the time) gained up on me until I finally snapped at them, told them off, and left. I got one last message from Oliver, but didn’t bother reading it. I blocked her, Francis, Kiku, and Ludwig on Facebook.

Think that’s the last of it? Think again!

Fast forward to A-Fest 2015. I’m having second thoughts about going because of last time. Matthew insisted I come anyway (mostly since I was rooming with him, and owed my share). Now prior to this, I was 90% sure he said he was going to come get me on his way to con. So imagine my shock when he says he will not be picking me up, but is picking up Oliver. I tell him off, decide I’m not going to con. But a mutual friend says they can come get me. I reluctantly, and regretfully, agree.

I end up spending little to no time at the con itself. Matthew got con plague on the first day (haha!). Half the time, I debated whether or not to call my mom to come get me and take me home!

After that con, I find out from Matthew that Oliver “has nothing against me” (as if!) and “wanted to talk to me during A-Fest” (yeah, right!). Unfortunately for her, I want nothing to do with her, or the fandom for that matter, anymore.

Now, I’m not saying everyone in the Hetalia fandom is bad, but these ones in particular really ruined it for me. I guess the only good ending here, is that I am no longer affiliated with those people, and have since found new interests with fandoms that are billion times better!

#submit anon #hetalia

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matthewko28 · 6 years

Text

Stay the Way We Are / Chapter 2

Hetalia fanfiction, human AU, EstIce platonic.

>>Chapter 1<<

Chapters: 2/9

A/N: The section is shorter (and also more angst) than I thought…, I feel guilty now ;w;

If you think Emil is so mean, I’m sorry, he has his own reasons ;w; I’d post Chapter 2 ASAP. (yes Chapter 1 ends here _(:3_ㄥ)_

Feel free to leave a comment or review :D Also if there are any mistakes please correct me in respectful, thanks!

Disclaimer: I don’t own anything mentioned in the story but the story itself!

Also on ff.net: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12947426/2/Stay-the-Way-We-Are

Is it a trap or just a coincidence? Emil can’t stop suspecting it. He’s certain that he didn’t do anything offensive to other ones these days…, more or less.

What on earth is happening now? Why the situation looks like an elementary school teacher is introducing a transfer student to his lovely classmates?

Emil is never a person who likes to write all his feelings on his face, but, today, he is startled thoroughly. He stares at Mathias, mouth opening a little wider.

“Alright––! Now everyone knows our project is a long-term project, right? Also, we’re running an internship program so over the following months we’ll have some cute interns joining in and helping us, and then we’d show them how to run a research project organized so many teams! And finally! Today!” Mathias grabs his microphone more tightly, with the other hand showing the corner of their meeting room, “Let’s welcome our first newbie here!”

If Emil wasn’t sure he had lived in Mathias’ house for at least 3 months, he would assume that this host is pointing his nose.

“Never mind. He loves to be an icebreaker like that, though usually it’s not useful at all,” Lukas lays back in his chair, turning to them both and telling in his smooth and relaxed tone.

Yes, both–– Emil turns to see the other one sitting next to him, in a very awkward way. In the past weeks, there was only himself sitting in the corner, however, a newcomer is asked to sit on the same side today, making Emil become extremely nervous, almost twenty times more alarmed than ever. The person has arrived here since the beginning, participating in the whole activity like Emil has done. At the end of the meeting, he follows Mathias’ advice, standing up and greeting all members in the meeting room.

Eduard von Bock, the confident guy’s name, studies at the same school as Mathias. The only difference is that he’s an undergraduate while Mathias has got his master’s degree.

Emil thought he could still pretend to ignore people though he has felt tense enough, until the time Eduard sat down beside him. His first words almost make Emil freeze at his desk, “Excuse me, are you the cat sitter in planetarium that day?”

“Hey! Do you know each other?” Oh gosh, Mathias, shut up, please. Lukas, please stop him, “Then Emil could be Eduard’s mentor… oh it sounds great! Eduard? Hello? Mr. Bondevik, the one sitting beside you, will show you what an intern has to do. That’s his work content now. You could have a short chat first. If you’re familiar with each other, it’ll lighten the workload also let you learn your partner’s skills. And now! The meeting is finished! Thank you all for attending and it’s time to go home!”

Emil wants simply to wring Mathias’ neck now. If it was allowed, he’d also ask the other Mr. Bondevik to do this.

All the members leave the meeting room immediately. After Lukas asked them “Remember to turn off the lights and lock the doors,” there are only two men staying in the wide space.

Emil knows Eduard is looking at him. It’s not an uncomfortable gaze though, he just feels weird.

The young man looks like he’d not leave here right now. He’s back to his desk already.

Oh, gosh.

“Um… Emil?”

“Bondevik.”

Eduard stretches out his hand, “My name is Eduard von Bock. You can call me Eduard.”

“I see.” The room sinks in silence again. Emil takes a deep breath, has no choice but to shake hands with him.

“I don’t even know you participate in the project, too. Honestly, I thought you took a part-time job in the museum,” as expected, after they exchanged greetings, it’s Eduard who starts a conversation, “I met with some seniors a few days ago and they told me I could call them by their first names, so I’m wondering if you accept that I call you as the same way. After all, there is another Mr. Bondevik. I hope I could avoid mixing you up.

“Well, then it’s up to you.”

“Great. Nice to meet you, Emil.”

Emil murmurs a few words, standing up and packing his bag.

The anxiety appears silently. It can always upset him, reminds him the life one year ago, the days he struggled to fit in and eventually failed to do it.

If the guy manages to stay here, he’ll be very willing to get going first.

However, Eduard also begins packing up his belongings. It looks like he’s planning to leave here with Emil, still trying to talk with him, “You looked proficient in taking care of the cat so… sorry for misunderstanding you. Are you from around here? Or are you here for studying? What’s your school name? By the way, what’s your major? Because you also take a part in the project, I guess you’re major in…”

“Has anyone told you your smile is annoying?”

Emil heavily closes his laptop, wrapping all his stuff in the bag. He bites his lower lip slightly, finally turns to Eduard and chokes out other words, “Leave me alone, please.”

He walks out of the room, dare not stop for even if one more second.

There’s no way to turn back.

He has already blocked all of it.

>>Chapter 3<<

>>original Chinese version<< (including English version Chapter 1&2)

#estice #aph estonia #aph iceland #hetalia #stay the way we are

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cinalilli · 7 years

Note

in your art tutorial (which was awesome and helpful btw) you had an example which i believe was the last one of a person with a long ponytail and honestly the way their hair looks in that fascinates me so i was wondering... how did you do the thing ? im rubbish at hair .

First of all thanks! I’m going to try and roll both a tutorial as to how I draw that particular hairstyle as well as an overall hair tutorial, aight?

when it comes to that sorta thing I draw a rough sketch first (sometimes i don’t out of habit, but with unfamiliar or more complicated hairstyles it never hurts to have your hairline down

I also lay down where the parts in the hair are (rella specifically has kinda roundish bangs along her forehead)

ok so a lot of more anime-ish hairstyles can be broken down into different parts

rella has:

the bottom part of her hair (red, which is a little closer to her skull and comes off of it a little bc That’s Just What Ponytail Hair Does unless it’s a really tight one or something)

a braid along each side of her hair that meets around in the back (blue, it’s relatively stylized because I don’t want to draw a lot of strands All The Time)

the Rest of It (green) which is essentially just hair going from the part into the braid or into the other side of her head

she also has a ponytail

the way i stylized it basically makes her hair really ribbonlike in shape but it’s also really thin in shape and texture so it’s easier to play with in terms of shape and volume

if i were to make it thicker hair, this is how i’d do it: a lot closer to tufts as opposed to strands, though when shading, i’d follow more or less the same ribbon shape (with respect to the bumpy shape of the tufts of course)

when i’m done with all of that, i normally merge my sketches and make them transparent and i take a brush and start lining (this one i just used is this one, it’s my only downloaded brush pack and that’s just because i’ve been using it for so long tbh)

little detail things that i do:

divide the hair into mini strands as you see fit, define it!! especially on shorter, tuft-ier hair (like in rella’s bangs). generally i define it more where more shading is, because that gives me more of a baseline as a whole.

hair is like fabric but it’s on your head. and your head is round, so rumple it! make it come up OFF of the head, make it emphasize the shape of it! it’s a wonderful way to make it realistic just by making it a little ruffly

hairlines are not always super clean cut. jag em up! show where individual follicles are being pulled if u Gotta.

for the back hair: pretty much always show it going into the background. the more you indicate that there is DEPTH to the hair, the better it works.

more detail things but more actual bodies of hair:

do whatever you can to continue to indicate that the hair is 3-dimensional. make it twist around corners, make it move and spill together. have fun this is the payoff

separate it! it’s a very art nouveau look, plus it makes it look to actual hair with strands moving and doing their own thing

have hair not only break away from the bigger body, but also have it interact with obstacles. hair does that

rella has auburn hair, and i just randomly picked out some colors that seemed legit, if not a little ugly

screen layer + multiply + overlay + a background to set the mood

im making a palette out of this

ok with the base colors all flatted in, i’m finally ready to actually…color the hair

there are several ways to go about it this time around i’m blocking it large areas with (circular) gradients. it’s a trick i picked up from studying how himaruya (the artist for hetalia) does things and I think it lends itself pretty well to a silky hair texture.

i also took her skin color and used it right next to the bangs to make them look more transparent

i took the highlighter color from the palette i made and blocked in some soild shadows on a multiply layer. i’m probably going to change up the colors after a bit to make it look nicer, but for now, this will do just fine!

i did the same with the highlight and an overlay layer. it looks a little off right now, but i can always change it later.

i ended up not using the palette as much as i thought (which is ok! it happens) and i locked the layer with the shading on it so i can just go in with a light blue instead, so that it looks more unified!

and there!

this last bit is optional because black lines look fine but a style thing to consider is coloring the lines, which i did here:

and yeah that’s how i do hair

#burned-toast #answered ask #hair #how to draw hair #anime #anime tutorial #hair tutorial #help #art help #art tip #digital art #lineart #ponytail #braids #long post #long tutorial #anime hair #gabriella acerbi

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renaroo · 7 years

Text

Good and Evil

Disclaimer: Hetalia and associated characters are the creative property of Hidekaz Himaruya. Warnings: Casualties of war, Prejudice, Mentions of post-WWII Germany Rating: T Summary: America begins to wonder about the blurred lines of Good and Evil after being asked to show the German people mercy.

A/N: This was originally published with my joint account I shared with @theeffar in 2011 for our Hetalia works, and in my unending need to cultivate and streamline my online works, I’m reposting some of the ones I’m still proud of here and on my AO3.

Original A/N: The account of the immigrants in this story share a special meaning to me. They're allusions to the story of how my family was moved to America so please don't slander them too harshly.

He stares, unblinking, at it all and soaks it in. Soaks it all in.

A million thoughts run through his mind at once. They all seem to be right and wrong and everyone is celebrating. It’s happy. They’re all happy, so should he.

Still, he must remind himself that the soldiers here earned that happiness. They fought for him, fought harder than he had any reason to ask them to.

America is more proud than he is happy.

He supposes that this is because he keeps thinking about the surrendering. He thinks about how he and the Allies surrounded the nation who seemed as though he would never stop fighting until his Boss left him alone and disenchanted.

He asked for mercy. America wanted to know why he should get it.

“Because,” said Germany, “I have people, too.”

He was not very happy with himself in Berlin.

America checked in with the troops there, met with his General.

The whole of Germany looked like Hell. Still, so many of his soldiers were happy with it.

For a while, America had been happy with it, too. Then he saw a little girl dead on the corner.

She had been wrapped up in what the nation could only describe as swaddling clothes. The child was caked in mud and dirt and shit. Her skin was gray and there was no helping her.

From the time he had been a young colony, America had liked black and white. Things needed to be categorized as bad or as good. Villain or hero.

Seeing a child’s dead, gray skin hit a strange nerve.

“I don’t think all the Germans are evil.”

Isolationism had taught America the value of a good friend. The main problem was that he didn’t have one.

When he joined the Allies in this war, he found something that could only be described as an acquaintance in old England.

It wasn’t much, and it certainly wasn’t anything like it used to be. But America felt like he had no one else to speak to.

The former empire looked like shit. The Luftwaffe would do that to you. But he still looked more spry than he had when America had first joined the war.

The older nation sipped his tea and then lowered it. The way he stared at America was both curious and annoyed.

It was the end of a war. Couldn’t America work this out on his own?

“Of course they’re not all evil,” he finally scoffed. “Have you been reading too much into your own propaganda?”

Maybe. America can’t help but think of a time which wasn’t so long ago when all the British were evil, too.

It’s easier to sort through his thoughts in Hungary.

The landscape is beautiful, though scarred. Still, as he travels with some of his soldiers, he can’t help but be thankful.

There aren’t many Germans here to confuse him. And there aren’t any dead children on the streets for him to see.

He’s most thankful for that.

The train was completely overturned. Luggage of the more unfortunate passengers seems to have been blasted away from the wreckage by a few hundred feet. The crater where the dropped bomb dented in the Earth is only a few yards from the tracks.

“Were people killed?” America asks.

Of course they were.

He never gets an answer. There is only the snickering of those around him in the unit.

“I don’t know why this is bothering me so much,” America expresses without touching his cup.

He just stirs it lazily.

“Perhaps you should have sent Captain America in your stead,” England scoffs. “He never has to kill anyone to save the country from the Third Reich. He’s apparently more efficient than the Allies could have hoped to be.”

America does not deny this out loud. He merely thinks about how it was much more of a job for Superman.

The little girls are sisters. They look too much alike not to be.

They smile pleasantly to the American soldiers and accept the tiny gifts the healthy, young men offer them.

America hands them a pack of gum. More specifically, it’s to the smaller one.

“How old are you?” he asks sweetly.

The girl is perplexed by his English.

America thinks back for a moment and tries again. “Hány éves vagy?”

As soon as the language left his tongue, the older girl pales and takes her sister’s hand. America doesn’t want them to pale, he just wants to have a small conversation. The entire situation is rather suspicious.

Suddenly a woman who had been talking to another soldier runs forward. She’s short, not even five feet, but she looks like she could take on a tiger if they come closer to the girls.

She hides them behind her and mutters, “Bocsánat. Bocsánat. Ők félénk.”

The way she speaks is thick, thicker even than Hungarian. Despite her best efforts, each syllable is pronounced like there is something blocking her nose.

America recognizes this and feels a little ashamed.

He hands her the English to German dictionary he’s been keeping in his back pocket. She takes it curiously and then looks at him, slightly horrified.

“Where can you go?” he asks. She doesn’t respond, so he tries again. “Überall zu gehen?”

Her eyes drift away from him. “Nein.”

Her fingers are trembling in their vice grip on the book.

“Versuchen Amerika,” he responds before handing the older of the two girls a chocolate bar.

His tea has gotten awfully cold.

“I had a huge number of Dutch settlers for the longest time,” America explains. It’s a flat statement, not meant to be taken as shame or boast.

“I recall,” England states dryly. “Are you going to continue wasting my tea?” Tea sounds much more gentlemanly than time.

“Probably,” America responds before rubbing his chin. He would have to remember to shave later. “I don’t know much German, though. Is that weird?”

England stares at him before crossing one leg over the other. “What’s all this about, America?”

“Heroes shouldn’t scare people,” he explains as if it is a deep meaning philosophy beyond another’s comprehension. “But I think I scare German people.”

“Some of them should fear us,” England retorts. “Should fear you. We’re putting them back in their place.”

“But not all Germans are evil.”

The older empire sighs and rubs his temples. America is so young and naïve.

“Do you want us to be more lenient on them this time around?” England questions, voice full of accusation. “Because I damn well know that not all of my people were evil and it didn’t bloody well stop the Blitz.”

America settles in his seat only for a second before scooting around again. “No, nothing like that. Someone’s got to make sure this doesn’t happen again. All I’m saying is that a lot of my people are German in some way. Kind of like a lot of my people are English or African or French or Japanese.”

“That’s what you wanted. To be a ‘melting pot,’ if I recall.”

“I’m not saying I’m not happy,” America stresses. “All I’m saying is that they shouldn’t fear me. It doesn’t make me feel good and it’s useless. I’m not going to hurt them. They should be scared of their own Nazis.”

“What makes you think they aren’t?” England asks.

America’s soil feels like getting the perfect sundae: amazing.

He joins so many of his soldiers in happily diving into welcome home.

Walking around New York City again is strangely surreal. There are no signs of bombers, of land mines, of anything remotely like the European front.

He stops on a familiar path and stares at the woman speaking broken English like someone stuck plugs in her nose.

“Elizabeta, Magdalena! You come! We meet your uncle!”

America smiles. The woman is no more than five feet, most likely a lot shorter without her new heels. The two little girls follow their mother with shouts of “Nein!” and “Schwester!” and “Mutter!”

The End

Translations: "Hány éves vagy?” Hungarian. "How old are you?" “Bocsánat. Bocsánat. Ők félénk.” Hungarian. "Sorry. Sorry. They are shy." “Überall zu gehen?” German. "Got anywhere to go?" "Nein." German. "No." "Versuchen Amerika." German. "Try America." "Schwester!" German. "Sister!" "Mutter!" German. "Mother!"

#writing #hetalia fic #APH: America #APH: England

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