#I’ve learned what real forgiveness is and it’s not what I thought it was which made actually doing it so much easier

[minustwofingers]

exoplanet p.1

masterlist

ellie williams x fem! reader (ur kind of a girly girl in this one sorry)

summary: you’re one of the luckiest people in the world as one of the few families that managed to gain entrance to the most exclusive safezone on earth. after living 19 years of your life in a soft and forgiving world, a lab accident sends you across the country to jackson, wyoming, entirely unprepared and unaware of what awaits you in the real world. its a good thing u run into a hot lesbian wink wink nudge nudge

a/n: now listen now hear me out i know this plot sounds kooky asf and im sorry i literally thought this shit up in a covid fever dream. but anyway i basically blacked out at the keyboard and have about 6k words to show for this weekend and no completed hw. i can’t believe im writing. this im so sorry

warnings: ellie is mean asf at first, reader is clueless and cannot do a pushup, you’re also a little bit of a snob and have a fixation on etiquette.  i promise it gets better just bear w me lMAO. she/her pronouns for the reader, v vanilla violence and explicit language. kinda enemies to lovers vibe

im so sorry u guys idk what got into me this is the goofiest au i’ve ever written ok but i just want ellie to get to learn abt the stars and shit after all she’s been thru she deserves it ok enjoy part 2 coming whenever i finish it.

wc: 6k

It wasn’t that you didn’t know that something bad had happened to the rest of the world. You did. Of course you did. You’d have to be a special kind of stupid to not realize that there was maybe something else going on when no one was allowed outside of the walls and anyone who returned told hushed stories of decimated buildings and piles of corpses.

It was just difficult to grasp the idea of the world you knew no longer existing outside the bounds of the city. To anyone before the pandemic, you’re sure that you lead what seemed like a normal life for any privileged kid.

You had two parents, both of whom loved you very much. You went to an elementary school, then a middle school, and then eventually high school and university. You went shopping with your friends. You watched movies and ate shitty junk food and had first kisses and went on ice cream dates. You studied what captivated your interest the most—space—and threw your soul into learning about the physics of the universe.

You laid on your dorm bed, playing with the edges of your pink comforter as you gossiped with your roommate, Irena, about the professor that she thought was hot and the boy who tried to harass you for your number after you’d finished up getting lunch.

You lived a normal life, which is pretty ironic, because the only reason you got to say that was because you were born to not-normal people who had been at the right place at the right time when the world fell apart.

You see, when everyone got sick, some areas got hit harder than others. And your parents, who were vacationing in some swanky exclusive Canadian resort that only the elite knew about, happened to hit the jackpot.

Not only was their vacation spot the one area in North America with a significant metropolitan population that managed to get enough time to adequately prepare, they happened to be traveling with some big-wig execs that knew a guy who knew a guy who was in the process of evacuating and putting the final touches on a safe zone, Terranova, intended for only the highest rungs of North American society.

So, there you were. Some 25 years or so after the world as your ancestors knew it fell to shit—and you were sipping cappuccinos and getting facials without a care in the world. All because of a lucky vacation.

And, for the record, it’s not that you were ungrateful. You knew that you were lucky to be living in the last place on earth with a semblance of normalcy. What you didn’t know, however, was just how lucky you were, and you didn’t find this out until you made that one stupid mistake in Gunther’s lab.

~

“Morning, Y/N!” called out Professor Gunther, a short, squatty man with a receding hairline so impressive that his forehead now ended halfway up his scalp.

“Morning, Professor,” you said, setting your bag down on the desk, winding your long scarf from around your neck and running a hand through your hair to get the tangles out. The wind outside had been especially fierce for February, which was not ideal given that you'd forgotten your hat at home.

“Guess what I’ve got?” Gunther was smiling, his teeth perfect white squares.

You gasped. “No. It’s already here?”

He said nothing; instead, he pushed forward a slightly battered box with dents and various smudges and marks that were telltale indicators for outside shipments.

“No way,” you said, pulling it into your hands. For a moment you debated using your nails to open the seam, but you’d just gotten them done, so you reached for a pair of scissors on the table.

“This is even more than we need,” you told Gunther, reaching in to pull out a spool of wire that shimmered under the lab lights. “Can I just hook it up now? Or is there something else I should do?”

There was, in fact, something that you should’ve done before going with your pliers and wire. Something about your model wasn’t quite right, but you’d figure that out a little too late.

You see, you and old Professor Gunther were attempting to build a prototype that would enable travel at the speed of light. It did sound insane—and you should’ve known that it was a pipe dream—but you were a space nerd with nearly limitless funding and support from one of the most famous surviving professors in the world. It had been Gunther’s pet project, one that you joined as a research assistant in your first year at the university. Once you’d caught wind of it, you couldn’t stay away, and you two quickly began to form a connection only understood by lonely and isolated academics.

“Go for it,” said Gunther, waving his hand dismissively.

Excitedly, you approached the table, your hands almost shaking as you held the wire. It was a fairly new invention, first used in the creation of Terranova and its walls to effectively make it invisible to the outside world. It boasted a variety of properties that made it academically fascinating and functionally useful. Gunther had had a suspicion that it would be useful in stabilizing the process of disseminating atoms to make light speed travel possible, so you’d placed the order for a couple of spools.

“And I think that’s it,” you said, using your pliers to shape the blunt edge that you had just clipped and plugging it into the circuit board. A purple sheen seemed to vibrate around the bundle of wires and boxes.

Gunther leaned over your shoulder, peering at everything through the spectacles perched on his pudgy nose. “Well done, dear. Say, before we turn this thing on and start running some preliminary tests, would you mind grabbing us some tea from the caf? My treat.”

“Of course,” you said, standing up and brushing your hands off. “Lapsang?”

He nodded. “And anything you’d like.”

You pulled my scarf back on, pulling it snugly around your neck and snatching your bag from the table. The walk to the cafeteria was short, but it was cold enough to require suiting up again. You ordered, paid with Gunther’s card, and sat quietly as you watched the snow fall outside.

It was a beautiful morning. The wind had died down, leaving the snow to fall from the gray skies in fat, puffy flakes. The city outside was quiet, with only the gentle hum of the occasional car to break the silence.

“Y/N! A Lapsang Souchong and a Jasmine Green?”

You leapt up and grabbed the two disposable cups, smiling widely at the barista. “Hey, would you mind throwing a bag of coffee in too?”

“Anything specific?” he asked.

“I don’t know anything about coffee,” you admitted. “Anything that isn’t decaf. It’s for my roommate.”

He nodded and rang you up for the coffee, and you were back on your way.

“My dear!” boomed Gunther when you came back, throwing the lab door open and nearly floating off the ground in excitement.

“Lapsang with a spot of honey, as always,” you said, passing the cup into his hands. The bite from the heat slowly faded from your palm—the barista had forgotten to put a sleeve on his cup.

“Lovely,” he said, setting it down next to you. “I’m just going to go ahead and flip the switch…keep your wits about you! Haha.”

“Ha,” you said, though suddenly you were getting more nervous. The longer you looked at the wires, the less sense they made. And was that two uncovered wires touching? ”Hey, wait, actually—”

Click.

A hum filled the room as the power flicked on. The bright white overhead lights flickered once, twice, and then went out. Something that smelled suspiciously like smoke filled the room.

“Fuck!” Gunther fumbled for the switch. You, similarly, lunged forward to see if you could manually disconnect the wires from the input. “It’s short circ—”

As soon as you made contact with the input wire, you heard the sound of a cup tipping over seconds before the splashing of hot tea.

Then everything went black.

~

When you awoke, it was because you were shaking so hard that your teeth were clicking painfully together.

Slowly, you pulled open my eyelids to see a brilliantly blue sky without a cloud in sight, wide and unimpeded by any skyscrapers. This was definitely not Gunther’s lab.

You groaned as feeling began to return to your body, along with a thudding headache and soreness in every joint. Gently, you pressed your weight into your fingers and slowly sat yourself up, making observations as you went.

You were not dead. Your heart was still beating and your nerves still functioned as usual. You had no idea how long you'd been lying on the ground, but it had to have been at least an hour given that the sun was almost in the middle of the sky.

Another observation: you were nowhere near Terranova.

Instead, you were in the clearing of a forest, surrounded by trees with unfamiliar trunk patterns and leaves. A thick bed of white snow coated everything in sight except for you.

You were well and truly fucked. There was nowhere even remotely nearby the city that you knew was in a fully forested area.

Though at least now you held the title of the first person alive to travel at light speed. It was a small comfort, but it was something to cling to.

A shriek sounded behind you, and you spun around, still seated on the ground. The forest line was clear, but you could hear rustling. For a moment you considered that it could be an animal, but it didn’t sound like any woodland creature. It sounded unmistakably human.

“Hello?” you called out.

The shriek came again, accompanied by more crunching—both much closer this time.

“Are you alright?” you asked, hoping your voice would carry to whoever it was. “Are you hurt?”

A mangled man suddenly came into sight as he fell into the clearing from a lopsided sprint, barreling right towards you. One of his knees was bent outwards as he went, so badly it looked broken, but it wasn’t enough to slow him down as he ran towards you.

You screamed, a real and proper one that pierced the frigid air. There was no time for to run as the man closed the gap and rammed into you, his filthy hands gripping your arms through your heavy jacket as his snapping teeth and rancid breath lunged for your neck.

Bang!

A single shot rang out. The man fell limp, slumping on top of you as you frantically snapped into motion and scrambled out from under him.

“Who the fuck are you?”

You whipped back around to see a girl standing at the other side of the clearing, a revolver in her hand and an incredibly cross expression etched into her features. She must’ve been around your age, and she had short auburn hair that barely brushed her shoulders and was being tossed about by the wind. There was a spattering of freckles across her face, muted against the backdrop of her cheeks reddened from exertion.

“Hi,” you said, your voice small and pathetic. You couldn’t stop shaking. “I’m Y/N.”

The girl just stared at you for a few more beats before turning back. “Jesse! Dina! Some help?”

You pulled your knees into your chest as you waited for whatever was to come. Now that the man was off of you, you could see that there was blood trickling from his gaping maw. Something that looked almost like shards had sprouted, like little spring buds, in little areas around his face. Even his normal, unshard-ed skin was a pallor that looked like death. Something wasn’t right here.

“Okay,” said the girl, gruffer this time. “Listen, I don’t know who the fuck you think you are just waltzing in like this, but this isn’t open to the public, alright? You’re trespassing.”

“Sorry,” you said, shrinking further into yourself as you thumbed the edges of your scarf. “I didn’t know.”

“Get the hell out of here,” she said, grabbing your backpack from the ground near her feet and throwing it at you.

Two other people emerged from the trees, another girl and one guy. They all seemed roughly the same age—early 20s, maybe—and were all carrying various weapons ranging from guns to knives.

To say you were on edge would be the understatement of the century.

They spoke in hushed tones as they approached the first girl.

“I don’t understand,” the other girl said, long black locks escaping from her ponytail. “We literally just patrolled this area. There’s no way to get here without either going through the town or going over the pass, and no one’s done that.”

“And you’re sure you didn’t see her then?” The boy looked curiously at you.

“Fucking obviously,” snapped the first girl. “I think we would’ve noticed.” Then, directed at you: “Hey. How’d you even wind up here?”

“Uh….” Your mouth became dry. “Where am I again?”

The girl rolled her eyes. “You’re telling me you don’t even know?”

“Ellie,” warned the other girl. “Maybe she’s been out here for a while. Hypothermia can make you think crazy things.”

“She doesn’t look like she’s been out here for long,” pointed out the first girl, presumably Ellie.

“You’re right outside Jackson,” said the other girl helpfully.

“How close am I to Terranova?”

“The fuck is Terra-whatta?” Ellie frowned at you.

“Where I live,” you said. “I—I’m a student there. I was working on a project and something went wrong and then all of a sudden I woke up here and—what is that thing?” You gestured frantically at the limp body of the man beside you, the shock slowly subsiding as reality set in. “He almost killed me!”

Ellie gaped at you along with her two friends. “What do you mean, what is that thing? Have you never seen a runner before?”

“A runner?” You stared back. “These things are normal enough for you to have a name for them?”

“Oh my god,” said Ellie, pinching the bridge of her nose between her fingers. “Have you, like, never been outside before?”

“No,” you said, honestly. “I’ve never left the city walls.”

“We have got to take her back with us,” said the other girl.

“Dina.” Ellie scowled. “Don’t be ridiculous.”

“Dina’s right,” said the guy, finally chiming in. “We can’t just leave her out here. She doesn’t even know what a runner is. She’s gonna be killed like that.”

Ellie considered, gnawing her lip. “Fine. Consider this your lucky day, Y/N. Get up.”

The first thing you did upon reaching your feet was faint once again.

~

“I told you, Joel, we just found her like this! Lying on the ground, with nothing but her bag.”

A man said something that you couldn’t quite catch.

“Yes. I went through it. No weapons, just…weird things. Like this.”

Your eyes snapped open to see Dina rooting around in your backpack, pulling out your laptop. You were laid horizontally on a table in some warmly lit home.

“Hey!” you said. She turned around, along with a tall, buff man at her side. “Be careful with that. That has all my homework on it.”

“See?” Dina whispered. “Do you think she hit her head or something, Joel?”

Joel frowned, picking up your laptop despite your protests. “I haven’t seen one of these in…I can’t even remember how long. And I’ve never seen one this slim before. Where’d you say you got this, er…”

“Y/N,” Dina supplied.

“From my university,” you said. There was a fire that crackled somewhere behind you, and it sounded comforting. “They provide all students with laptops. That’s how we do most of our schoolwork.”

“Let me guess,” said Joel. “You from the North? A place called Terra Something?”

“That’s a real thing?” Ellie came from around the corner, standing with her arms crossed. She’d changed out of her heavy winter coat and was instead wearing a dark gray hoodie with the strings tied into a bow.

“Never been there myself,” he said. “But when I was doing supply runs back in Boston we always heard whispers of a safezone in Canada. For rich assholes who had some even richer survivalist friends. The Fireflies attempted to break in for years, but they could never find it.”

“So, like a QZ?” asked Ellie, looking genuinely curious.

“What’s a QZ?” you asked. No one acknowledged it.

“Not quite,” said Joel. “No FEDRA. With no military presence, I’m sure it was a hell of a lot cushier living there. Wasn’t it, Y/N?”

“I don’t have anything to compare it to,” you said. “But, yeah. I guess it was nice. It was just normal, I guess. Nothing extraordinary.”

“You’re wearing a cashmere scarf,” Joel pointed out. “That’s not what I’d call normal in the apocalypse.”

You blushed, pulling at the fringes of said black scarf. The fabric was thin and soft, impossibly warm against your bare neck. “It didn’t—it doesn’t feel like the apocalypse in Terranova.”

“And how’d you make it all the way out here?”

“I’m a research assistant for a professor attempting to invent travel at the speed of light,” you said. “We just hooked it up to a different wire today. It short-circuited and when my professor and I rushed to shut it off, he spilled his tea on me and the prototype. Next thing I knew, I woke up here.”

Joel blinked. “What now?”

“I know it sounds crazy,” you said, defensively pulling your knees to your chest. “But I’m telling the truth, honestly. Plus, look at me.” You let go of your scarf and held out your hands, letting the glow of the fire catch the immaculate pearl polish on your fingers. “Do I look like someone who’s traveled from Canada to wherever I am now?”

“She’s got a point,” said Dina, nodding thoughtfully. “It really must be nice where you come from to have hands like that. It doesn’t look like you’ve done a day of work in your life. Reckon you could take us back with you?”

Joel sent her a stern look. “What did you parents do to gain access to a place like that? You the daughter of the president or something?”

“No. They just got lucky,” you explained. “They were summering in Canada and happened to befriend the founders of Terranova right before outbreak day.”

“‘Summering’,” repeated Joel. “It’s been a while since I heard someone use a season as a verb. Somehow it’s not been long enough.”

You cringed.

“I’m not gonna lie, it’s a little disappointing to hear that folks like your parents are still living in the lap of luxury, even after the world ended,” said Joel. “A part of me hoped that karma would get ‘em.”

“I didn’t realize how bad it was out here,” you said defensively. “They didn’t even tell me about…what was that that tried to kill me out there? Walkers?”

“Runners,” Ellie supplied. She watched you quietly from her position leaning up against the couch.

“You ran into one?” asked Joel, another wrinkle appearing in his forehead. “Ellie, have you checked her for bites?”

Ellie’s freckled face paled as she swore. “Fuck. No, I forgot. I should’ve done it in the clearing.”

“Well, better now than never. Listen, I gotta meet up with Tommy. You check ‘er. You got a gun ready, just in case?”

“Excuse me?” you scoffed, looking thoroughly scandalized. “What do you mean, just in case?”

“I’ll be outside,” said Dina, following Joel as he left the door.

“How come it’s my job?” Ellie called after them. “No one asked me how I felt about this!”

The door banged shut in reply. She turned back to face you, her lips set into a firm line. “Fine. Take your coat off. Let’s make this quick.”

“I didn’t feel anything bite me,” you said, grabbing your knees tighter to your chest. Ellie was intimidating and scary, and you rather liked how you currently wore an extra layer of protection.

“Yeah, yeah, that’s what they all say.” She walked over to you, grabbing your scarf and unwinding it from your neck. “Shit. Is this what Joel called cashmere?”

“Yeah,” you said, watching as she stared at the fabric pooled in her hands. “It’s nothing special, really. Everyone wears them in Terranova.”

Ellie stared at you. “Can you stop saying Terranova? I swear it’s every third word that comes out of your mouth. I honestly couldn’t give a shit about whatever fantasyland you grew up in while the rest of us dealt with the real world.”

You opened your mouth, then thought better of it and closed it. It was discombobulating to hear a stranger swear so often at you.

Ellie knocked your hands from your knees and stared down at you. “Are you actually gonna make me take off everything myself? Do they have hired help to unzip your coats in Terra Novella?”

“Terranova.”

Ellie let out a sharp sigh, then lunged for the zipper near your throat.

“Okay, okay, fine,” you said, yanking yourself away and pulling your zipper down to reveal your standard lab outfit—a satiny button up shirt tucked into slacks. You pulled the rest of your puffer off, letting it drop in a pile next to you.

“So,” you said as Ellie grabbed your arm, gently rolling up the fabric of your blouse and turning your forearm back and forth, “Is this, like, a normal thing? To have deranged people in the woods attack you like that?”

“They’re not people,” she said quietly. Satisfied with your left arm, she moved to the next and let your unbuttoned sleeve fall. “Not anymore.”

“What do you mean?”

Ellie’s fingers encircled your right wrist as she fiddled with your sleeve. They were warm as they brushed across your skin, just barely touching you. “You really don’t know? I thought you at least knew about outbreak day.”

“Of course I know about outbreak day,” you said defensively. “I’m not stupid.”

Ellie arched a brow.

“They told us that it was a virus,” you added. “That it was lethal and incredibly infectious. Is that not what happened?”

“It’s not a virus, it’s a fungus,” corrected Ellie, letting go of your sleeve and stepping back as you redid the buttons at your wrist. “And it doesn’t just kill. It turns you into—into something like what you saw today. You lose your mind. The only thing that matters to you is biting everyone and spreading the infection.”

“Oh.”

“I saw you get tackled. Did your legs get scratched up at all?”

“No,” you responded, feeling thankful that you wouldn’t need to take your pants off. In that moment, literally nothing seemed more embarrassing. Your hands had begun to shake again.

“Didn’t think so.”

“If it had bitten me, would that mean that I…I would get sick too?”

“Nice going, Sherlock,” said Ellie, returning to her spot against the couch. “Really stellar reasoning skills there.”

You pulled your knees back into your chest, the gravity of the situation sinking in. All this time you’d thought it was just a virus—a measly virus that killed. That it could be anything else had never occurred to you.

“Keep shaking and I’m going to start to think that you were bitten.” She smiled thinly at you from across the room.

“I’m sorry,” you said, your teeth bouncing against each other once before you clenched your jaw. “Please cut me some slack. This is just a lot to take in. If you’ll recall, I’ve just been the first person in history to undergo atomic dissolution and reassembly. It’s a wonder I’m still alive.”

“Welcome to the club,” said Ellie, her eyes narrowed. “It’s a wonder any of us are alive.”

Your lips pressed tightly together as you sat, trying your best not to lose it at her. You’d always been brought up to be kind, to be forgiving and sweet and polite. After all, there was never any reason not to be. Terranova’s culture put a heavy emphasis on keeping the peace no matter what. Your parents rarely ever raised their voices. Your professors kindly and respectfully asked their pupils to settle down if they were too noisy, but since you were all brought up with impeccable manners, such instances were few and far between. It just wasn’t a thing to chew strangers out. Such behavior was only reserved for extraordinary situations of the like you’d never experienced. Speaking of manners…

“Thank you,” you said, finally. Yeah, you could be the bigger person.

Ellie’s gaze snapped up to you, her brow furrowed. “Huh?”

“For saving me,” you clarified, avoiding her eyes. They were uncomfortably piercing. “Sorry. I should’ve thanked you earlier. That was rude of me. And I’m also sorry for just barging in here. I promise it wasn’t on purpose. Trust me, I would do anything to be back home right now.”

“I bet you would.” Her eyes dropped briefly to your hands, unblemished and smooth as they clutched your knees. Not even a cuticle was out of place, a result of your weekly manicures and daily lotion habit.

“Sorry,” you said again, feeling heat rise in your cheeks once again. “I probably sound so insufferable and spoiled to you.”  

“Just—” She paused, frowning. “Just stop apologizing. It’s fine. It’s not your fault, or whatever.” The words seemed to pain her.

“What’s a QZ?” you asked. Now that you’d had a moment to draw in a few deep breaths, your hands were steady once again.

“Quarantine Zone,” said Ellie. “Established by what was left of the government for those of us normal people. There are a couple scattered around the country in the big cities.”

“Did you live in one? What’re they like?”

She was about to answer when the door banged open.

“Ellie!” Dina’s voice was breathless. “Joel wants me and you to go out and finish the patrol route together. She alright?”

“I’m fine,” you said quickly, hanging your legs off the table and reaching for your puffer.

“God, I fucking love that shirt,” said Dina. “Can I touch it? It looks so soft.”

You had a feeling that you would get on well with her. “Sure.”

“It’s not that soft,” said Ellie from the couch.

“Shut up, Ellie!” Dina walked over to you, grabbing the dangling fabric from your loose sleeves and letting it thread through her fingers. “Sorry about her, Y/N. She’s just like that sometimes.”

“Dina!”

Dina ignored Ellie’s protests, giving you a look full of mirth as she stepped back. “For the record, it was that soft.”

“You couldn’t wear it anywhere,” argued Ellie. “It looks ridiculous. Infected would just snag right onto the sleeves. That’s only if you didn’t get tangled up in a tree from all that loose fabric first.”

“There’s not an abundance of trees or sick fungus people in my research lab,” you said awkwardly. “So that’s not really something that crossed my mind when I got ready this morning.”

“Ha!” Dina’s eyes scrunched. “Ellie, be nice. Maybe she’ll claim us both as her long-lost sisters and get us into wherever she came from, but she’s not gonna if you keep acting like this.”

“It’s okay,” you said, shrugging. “I get it. I can’t even begin to imagine how much different your lives are out here. And, I mean, I probably could if you wanted. I’m pretty sure that all you need is a connection and a negative test for whatever the fungus is called.”

“See?” Dina gestured towards you. “Listen to her. She’s so wholesome.”

“I’d be wholesome too if I led the kind of life where I didn’t know about the infected and got to wear dumb shirts like that all day.”

Dina huffed. “Listen, Y/N, Ellie and I are gonna finish up with patrolling. I’m assuming you want to stay in Jackson until you figure everything out?”

You nodded. “If that’s alright. I don’t mean to impose.”

“We’ll talk to Maria and Tommy once we get back and see about getting you set up somewhere temporarily,” said Dina. “For now, you can just stay at Ellie’s until we finish up. Sound good?”

“Dina!” protested Ellie. “You’re just gonna leave her here unattended without even asking me?”

“What’s she gonna do? Ransack the town? With what weapon, Ellie? Her bare hands? She looks like she’d be blown over if I breathed too hard in her direction.”

You flushed. Sure, you’d never really seen much of a point of bulking up and working out when you were nothing but a student who spent all of her time goofing off with wires and telescopes, but it was humbling to have it pointed out so blatantly.

“She wouldn’t make it a day outside,” continued Dina. “I don’t think she’s stupid enough to try anything. Isn’t that right, Y/N?”

You blinked. “I mean, yeah. I’ve never spent a day without electricity and hot running water, so I’m not really clambering to leave and live in the woods.”

Ellie sighed sharply. “Fine. Cool. Whatever. Just stay where you are, okay? And don’t even think about touching anything.”

~

By the time that she returned with Joel, you were sitting at the table, 2 chapters deep into the one textbook you’d brought along with you for one of your courses.

“Glad to see the house still standing,” Joel quipped as he worked his heavy coat off his shoulders and pulled his boots off. Ellie trailed behind him, hanging up her coat and pulling off a pair of black gloves. “Ellie was concerned you’d raze the whole town.”

“I’m honored that she thinks me so capable,” you said in response, wincing as you had to dogear your textbook, your bookmarks and sticky notes tucked safely in your dorm desk far away.

Ellie sent you an irritated look before her gaze dropped to the textbook in your lap. It lingered for a moment, just long enough for you to know that she was reading the title Exoplanetary Systems.

“Tommy and Maria have decided to let you stay until you get back on your feet,” said Joel, oblivious to the hostility coming from Ellie. “There’s a cottage down the street that’ll be ready for you to move into soon. For now, you can stay with us. There’s an extra room across the hall from Ellie’s.”

“That’s too kind of you,” you said, your voice smooth and gracious after years of having your manners picked apart by your parents.  

Joel looked mildly uncomfortable. “Uh, yeah. Don’t mention it. You know how to ride a horse?”

“Yeah, a little.”

“Good,” said Joel. “Can you shoot, too?”

You stared. “Uh, shoot what?”

“A gun,” said Ellie slowly. Her arms were crossed tightly over her chest, her mouth contorted into a scowl. She did not seem overjoyed at the prospect of a new housemate.

“No,” you said. Your ears felt like they were on fire. “There’s, uh, a strict ban on guns in Terr–where I grew up. There was no reason to shoot anything.”

Joel whistled. “Well, imagine that. So maybe we won’t put you on patrol just yet. We’ll find something else for you to do. Got any other skills?”

Before you answered, Joel picked up your bag and peered inside of it. “Say, is this a bag of coffee?”

He pulled out the bag of coffee grinds that you’d picked up at the cafe.

“Yeah!” you said. “Before the, uh, accident, my professor sent me to get him tea from the cafeteria. I ended up picking those up since my roommate and I were out. You drink coffee?”

“Not much anymore,” said Joel, picking up the bag and weighing it back and forth. “It’s hard to come by out here. You have to pay an arm and a leg to get just a bit. I haven’t seen a bag like this since before the outbreak.”

“It’s yours,” you said quickly. “I don’t even really like coffee. I just drank it because my roommate would make me a cup.”

Joel shook his head and placed it back in your bag. “No, I couldn’t do that. I’d probably have to trade my whole arsenal plus a horse to get something this big.”

“Please, I insist,” you said. “It’s the least I can do. It’s just going to sit in my bag anyway. You’d appreciate it more.”

“Well…” Joel gave you a considering look. “I s’pose this could cover your work for a few weeks until either we find another job for you or Ellie teaches you to shoot.”

“Joel!” Ellie interjected. “I have my own shit to do.”

“That’s really generous of you,” you said, smiling at Joel. “But you could honestly just take the bag—no need to offer any reimbursement.”

Joel grunted and picked the bag up again, slinging it onto the counter behind him. “Maria’s never gonna believe me until she sees this. Full bag of monsoon malabar…didn’t even think they had that shit anymore…” He continued to mumble to himself as he shuffled around, opening and closing cabinets behind you.

When you looked back up, Ellie was staring again at your book, a line in her brow.

“You can borrow it, if you’d like.” You pushed the book towards her as a poor attempt to call a truce between you two. “It’s not like I actually need to do the reading anymore. I’m already missing lecture.”

You winced at the thought of getting behind in your classes. In the very likely case you weren’t getting back in the next few days, you’d probably need to take a gap semester and return in the fall, delaying your graduation date another 4 months. Your parents were going to kill you. This was going to create an unfillable hole in your resume. “Shooting a gun” and “riding horses” were not acceptable activities to explain away why you took a whole season off.

“No thanks,” said Ellie, pushing it back to you. “Keep it. I don’t want it.”

“It’s about solar systems outside of our locale,” you continued. “There’s a bunch of them. It’s actually really interesting.”

“It doesn’t really sound like it,” she said, but there was no venom behind her voice—just something that sounded like exhaustion.  

“Maybe not.” You sighed, deflated. So much for a white flag. “I guess it must seem pretty ridiculous to you.”

Ellie stood there, her arms still crossed and her frown deep. “Joel,” she said, speaking over your shoulder, “I’m going out. I’ll see you later.”

“Don’t do anything stupid,” said Joel. You could hear him bustling around in what you assumed was a kitchen, filling a kettle with water and lighting the gas top stove.

When you turned back around, Ellie was already out the door, coat slung over her arm as she shut it.

Before the door closed entirely, her eyes snapped up to meet yours like she knew you’d been watching her.

She was gone before you had the chance to lift your hand to wave goodbye.

again apologies for this if you’ve made it this far. please confiscate my laptop. part 2 coming soon (?) if u want also im not an astrophysics student im a thickheaded cs student who barely survived ap physics so im sorry if i’m doing a disservice to the academic field of astronomy idk shit about it 

#ellie williams x reader #ellie williams x you #ellie williams x oc #ellie williams self insert #ellie williams x y/n

[halemerry]

hii first of all, i absolutely love your metas on GO s2! your breakdown of the last few minutes of ep6 was really insightful and i love you for your meta about aziraphale and his role as a protector - it is a very astute look into his character and motivations which not a lot of people acknowledge in their theories/speculation after s2.

more to the point of this ask: this is something i've been mulling over and is the only thing that still doesn't make sense to me in ep6. why is crowley so nonchalant, or at least not noticeably worried, about the metatron showing up to the bookshop (a space he is very protective of) and taking aziraphala away for a talk after aziraphale has already been threatened by micheal? throughout the whole season crowley has been extremely protective over aziraphale and is very much aware of the real danger he is in (re: the book of life). this is also right after crowley has returned from heaven and has learned what the metatron was willing to do to gabriel to ensure 'institutional integrity' and that much bigger plans were afoot. i find it hard to wrap my head around his calm demeanor when the metatron enters the scene and takes aziraphale away, even if it's supposedly for a harmless talk. i wonder if you have any thoughts/speculation about this?

(opps this got too long and rambling). i would love to hear your thought but ofc please don't feel pressured to answer :) love your posts about the season and i look forward to reading more from you. have a lovely day!

Hi!! Thank you so much! This ask has had me by the throat basically since you sent it. It sort of touches on some things I already wanted to write about so forgive me if this spirals a bit.

So in a lot of ways I think this is a question that can have a one word answer. But since I do wanna talk about the way the show gives us this answer I actually want to start with Nina. Specifically I want to start with the thing she tells Crowley as Aziraphale’s off with the Metatron.

“You’re the hard bitten one that can’t trust anyone ever again and Mr. Wherever He Is is the soft one that still believes in magic people being basically good and all that."

I’ve talked a little bit about this line before in my meta about the build up to the Confession here because I think it’s important to view from the perspective of how it preps Crowley for the following conversation he’s about to have. But, aside from that, I think it's really important because it's wrong. Nina is describing herself here, not Crowley. She’s projecting her own issues onto him and Aziraphale in the way that she perceives herself relating to them. Crowley himself is actually the one that calls out her trust issues for what they are explicitly. 

Nina doesn’t trust and she sees herself in Crowley far more than Aziraphale both in demeanor and aesthetic so she assumes he doesn’t trust either. But she has it backwards. Because Crowley isn’t hard bitten as much as someone who tries very hard to be perceived as such. And, most importantly in this specific context, Crowley actually trusts quite a bit.

And he nearly always has. Even as far as back as the Starmaker.

Just look at the way that the Starmaker and Aziraphale both talk about interacting with God. Aziraphale is nervous, anxious and pretty much immediately clocks that what the angel that would become Crowley is saying is going to get him into trouble. But the Starmaker? Even upset about the information he’s been given, he remains confident in the fact that it can’t hurt to ask a few questions. He trusts there to be no consequence for expressing an objection. He trusts that his opinion is valued. Even if he ends up wrong here there’s no inclination at all that he thinks his words will be taken inappropriately. And even the Fall itself doesn’t burn this out of him.

We see him trust Aziraphale, the cherub who was supposed to be guarding Eden from things like him, not to smite him on sight. And trusts him enough to not only have a conversation but express his own worries about his own actions. He then approaches Aziraphale like a friend at the Flood and makes no attempt to censor his horror at what is happening there.

Job is the first time we see Crowley act in a way that implies mistrust between them. This is the first time they’ve met since the Flood which I suspect is contributing to his reluctance to be honest with Aziraphale here. They fall into their roles and then very rapidly fall out of them. The fact Azriaphale reaches out to Crowley here is important. As is the moment where Crowley asks Aziraphale if he’s sure. After Aziraphale more or less agrees to be all in something changes. Crowley is surprisingly honest about his view on the world, mostly trusting Aziraphale not to use it against him. He places himself in front of a host of angels, trusting that Aziraphale would not expose him. And then later he’s even more honest, admitting to Aziraphale he’s lonely in an attempt to show solidarity.

The entire Arrangement could not exist without them trusting each other. Crowley’s pushing at Aziraphale’s boundaries is a constant exercise in trusting that Aziraphale will come around eventually - or that he at the very least isn’t about to weaponize the treacherous things Crowley is saying against him. As early as 1601 we see Aziraphale voicing active concern for Crowley's well being. We then see Crowley actively trust Aziraphale with both their safeties in 1941 - whether it’s trusting Azriaphale to save them from the bomb about to drop on them or trusting Aziraphale’s trust in him to not accidentally discorporate him during the bullet catch. They even explicitly talk about their mutual trust in this year during their shades of gray conversation.

During Armageddon Crowley shows up trusting that Aziraphale will help him fix this and once Aziraphale agrees never once seems to consider the idea that Aziraphale would hide anything from him (even when Aziraphale is actively doing so).

He also critically knows that Aziraphale tried to reach God and got himself discorporated as a consequence. And likely specifically knows that Aziraphale talked to the Metatron and came away from that conversation realizing that Heaven would not help him. It's worth noting whether Crowley knows this bit or not that in this conversation Aziraphale not only explicitly questions the Metatron's authority but also uses the conversation to extract information from the Metatron.

Aziraphale leaves this conversation with an active lie to the Metatron and attempts to call Crowley to tell him everything he knew. He then continually chooses Crowley over Heaven. They pick their own side and help stop the world from ending.

And then, all season, Aziraphale keeps proving that the trust Crowley has always had in him is well earned. Aziraphale, even more than Crowley himself, brings up ideas of 'us' and 'our side' and 'our car'.

Aziraphale openly talks negatively of Heaven. Not only does he agree with Crowley's disbelief that Heaven managed to stay in charge sending people like Muriel down, but he even goes a step further, implying that they perhaps never had control over earth in that way.

He also, most critically, immediately and without hesitation, tries to turn down the Metatron's offer to even have a conversation. Aziraphale, who has also just brought a group of archangels to order, reaffirms his lack of interest in Heaven right then and there in front of Crowley. Right when the Metatron has reaffirmed the threat of the Book of Life is out of play.

Crowley trusts Aziraphale. He always has. And more than ever lately Aziraphale has given him proof that he doesn't have to worry about where he allegiances lay.

But. It's also worth noting. I don't think Crowley is as chill as he maybe seems like he is. Yes, he's sprawled out and speaking casually here, but to some degree this is a bit of posturing. He's playing it cool and also not encroaching on the control Aziraphale has managed to wrangle on this situation. But he also doesn't just let them wander off either. As soon as they hit the door, Crowley is out of the chair and walking to the front of the shop to watch them leave through the window. He's keeping tabs as they walk away.

He then banishes Muriel and promptly starts to clean. Now I'm always a little wary to mix Book and Show canon, but I do think his cleaning of the bookshop (as well as him carrying around stacks of books while babysitting Jim) are manifestations of Book!Crowley's tendency to want to stress clean. He's keeping himself busy and gets done too quickly then promptly glances at his watch before throwing himself into the chair with a frustrated noise. He's anxious and stressed the entire time Aziraphale is out of his line of sight.

In other words, Crowley's not actually as calm as he's presenting himself to be. He's trying to take that nervous energy out in a way that doesn't conflict with giving Aziraphale agency. Because he trusts his angel. And that in part is why it hits him so hard when it all blows up in his face.

#good omens #crowley #good omens meta #good omens spoilers #gos2 spoilers #good omens season 2 #answers #oh yeah this got waaaay long #oops

[fixing-bad-posts]

Heya, I really really hope this doesn't come off as particularly rude, but I was wondering, why would bisexual women be considered lesbians sometimes and I think you also brought up transgender men and genderqueer ppl? For bisexual women, I just am kinda confused, they can be in lesbian relationships and lesbian spaces, but just describing them as lesbians seems kinda confusing because lesbian denotes specifically sapphic attraction at least from where I've always heard it, so wouldn't it be kinda confusing. And for the genderqueer folks or trans folks, wouldn't that just bring their genders closer to feminine and at least from what I've heard from some pple I know, they don't like non binary being seen as more womanly (I've heard it being described as woman-lite before annoying) and instead seen as a more inbetween which it sometimes isn't, because of bigotry and other things since nbs can be both fem or masc or androgynous, but wouldn't non woman lesbians kinda push it to be seen as kinda more fem or that person as more fem? I don't know and frankly I'm just kinda confused. I'm really really sorry that this probably comes off as super rude and I hope you forgive me. I frankly just want to learn a little more and have been reading up but wanted to know what you thought. And I just realized how long this was, so so sorry

hello anon! these days, i usually don’t answer asks like these because i’ve already done so several times, but you seem very well-meaning and confused, so i’ll do my best to help. first of all, please check my faq for resources and links about mspec labels and bi lesbians.

second of all—generally—here is my advice for when you encounter a queer label that confuses you:

1) literally just ignore it until you...

2) meet someone in your life who uses that label, at which point you might (respectfully) ask them what using that label means to them specifically, and why it’s important. i’ve done this in real life. the script is something like,

“it’s really cool to get to talk to someone in real life about this stuff—if i may ask, what does identifying as [insert label] mean to you, personally?”

you might also say,

“i’ve never met someone who identifies with [their label] before. would you mind giving me some pointers on the important things to keep in mind in order to respect your identity/make sure you feel respected by me?”

i’ve also never asked anyone to correct me if i mess up and say something rude, but i’m working on the confidence and charisma to be able to say that, because i owe that to others.

all of that said, i wanted to respond to some of your specific questions, and clarify a couple of things below the cut. to clarify:

1. “describing [bisexual women] as lesbians seems kinda confusing because lesbian denotes specifically sapphic attraction”. to be clear i am not the one describing bisexual women as lesbians, in this hypothetical situation. when i post about bi-lesbians, i am posting in support of people who—for whatever reason—chose that label for themselves. what i am not doing: advocating to redefine the classically understood definition of lesbian for the entire populous.

2. “wouldn’t it be kinda confusing”? yes! i understand it can be confusing, and i commend you for expressing your confusion instead of reacting in disgust or anger. there are so many things in the queer community that are confusing, even to me, and you don’t need to feel guilty for asking questions as long as you come from a place of genuine curiosity. being confused isn’t bad, and defining yourself in a way that confuses others is, likewise, no transgression.

3. “for the genderqueer folks or trans folks, wouldn’t [identifying as a lesbian] just bring their genders closer to feminine […] wouldn’t non woman lesbians […] be seen as kinda more fem”? the answer is: sort of. it depends entirely on how and why the person using this label came to these words. you wrote, “i’ve heard from some pple i know, they don’t like non binary being seen as more womanly”, and i have definitely also heard that! so, for people who feel that way, they probably wouldn’t want a label that evokes womanhood and/or aligns them with femininity assigned to them. but every person is different—so for some nonbinary people, they absolutely do not want to be seen as “woman-lite”, whereas for other nonbinary people, they might want to be seen closer to femme than masc, while still nonbinary. this goes back to what i said at the beginning: best practice is to ask the people in your life how they want you to respect them.

closing thoughts: i hope this clarified some things, but i understand that the topic may still be confusing—feel free to message me if you want a non-judgmental queer to talk things through with. i promise i’ll take you in good faith <3

#ask fbp #anon ask

[lisbeth-kk]

Sherlock fandom

Am I Dreaming?

Sherlock doesn’t know what’s real and what’s imagination anymore. Everything is a blur of sleep deprivation, thirst, hunger, and excruciating pain. Whenever his jailer and the torturists are leaving him alone, he sighs relieved, but he soon panics when he starts to think about their return. It’s then a vision of John appears before him.

“You can do this, Sherlock. Don’t you dare give up; you hear me? I need you to come home to me, alright? There, now, shh, I’ve got you. Stay strong, Sherlock. For me. Please.”

John’s voice is commanding at first, urging Sherlock to get a grip, but it always turns tender when Sherlock can’t hold back his sobs. He wishes John would touch him, so he could feel his warmth and be comforted by those steady hands that have healed him so many times. Before Sherlock jumped off a roof.

In the early days of his capture, Sherlock was able to see himself from above. Taking stock over his misery and the cell, desperately trying to find a way to escape. The longer he was jailed, the more his brain failed him. It became mushy, the sharp observation skills left him, and he was unable to soar anymore. His only comfort was John’s visits.  

Sherlock knows he’s about to die. Before he met John, this wouldn’t have bothered him at all but now…now it’s an unbearable thought. Never to see John again? Not be able to explain why he had to jump. Why John couldn’t know that it was a magic trick. To beg John’s forgiveness. To tell John…

The door to his cell opens and Sherlock steels himself for whatever gruesome punishment the Serbians have installed for him. A familiar voice gives orders to someone. Sherlock’s eyes are blindfolded, but his hearing is still excellent. That voice…no, it can’t be. The person speaks Serbian, and to Sherlock’s knowledge, Mycroft doesn’t speak Serbian. Unless he’s learned it sufficiently enough to rescue Sherlock. No, that doesn’t make sense. Mycroft doing legwork? If Sherlock wasn’t so exhausted, he would’ve laughed. It comes out as a cough, which sends a sharp stab of pain through his entire body.

He must’ve blacked out, because when he wakes his cell is gone. At his right side there’s a small window. Sherlock’s brain is too dizzy to comprehend where he is, but he realises something. He is soaring again, but what he sees underneath is impossible. London. Sherlock is soaring above London!

“Am I dreaming?” he whispers and closes his eyes as tears start to form.

“Brother mine,” Mycroft says softly at Sherlock’s left side.

Sherlock keeps his eyes firmly shut. He can’t bear if this isn’t real.

“You are not dreaming, Sherlock,” Mycroft assures him.

Is his voice trembling?

Sherlock feels a hand on his shoulder. It’s warm. He opens his eyes and there he is, Mycroft Holmes, his arch enemy and big brother. They’re on a private jet, Sherlock discerns. Before he can ask, Mycroft lifts an eyebrow and nods.

“I will let him know.”

Sherlock sighs relieved and falls asleep while the tarmac comes into sight.

@flashfictionfridayofficial @totallysilvergirl @keirgreeneyes @calaisreno @phoenix27884 @a-victorian-girl @peanitbear @safedistancefrombeingsmart @gregorovitchworld @helloliriels @topsyturvy-turtely @raina-at @7-percent @ninasnakie

#flash fiction friday #sherlock fandom #sherlock #john watson #mycroft holmes #bbc sherlock #sherlock fanfic #johnlock #post reichenbach #FFF242 #Soaring Above

[hoshiumi78]

I’m gonna make a little happy “rant” here about Lloyd from Ninjago and just the cartoon in general.

I’ve always liked Lloyd. Ever since I was a kid, he was the one who I favorited over the others. Sure, Kai is awesome, Cole is super inspiring, Nya is an absolute baddie, Jay is funny, Zane is real cool, Pixal is an amazing robot girlfriend and samurai, Skylor is such a cool and strong female character to look up to, and etc. (Dareth, Nelson, Sensei Wu, Garmadon, Morro, Cyrus Borg…)

And yeah, a lot of people “like Lloyd” because he’s the “Green Ninja” or he’s “super cool”, but for me… that’s not it (I mean, a bit of it is, hehe. But not all of it). And as I become older in my teenage years, I’ve honestly been thinking about it a lot. I’ve been thinking about why I like this Lego character so much, and why this is the only “children’s” show I actually fan over where I can watch the show over and over throughout the years, write fanfics for hours on it, and spend my money on the sets and merch…

***Now I should probably say before I start, I’m not some crazy obsessive fan lmao. I just really like this character and show, and I want to shine some light on Lloyd (differently than he already receives, of course lol).***

Lloyd has been through a lot, yet he still came out as stable as he is (at least as much as the cartoon shows to the audience). One thing about Ninjago I like is how they make the characters realistic. I didn’t particularly realize this until I got older and I re-watched it, but all Ninja have a unique story before, during, or after they became Ninja. Though one thing that differs Lloyd from the rest is how young he was when he clearly knew his situation with his father, mother, “Ninja-acknowledgement”, family, etc. And I know what a lot of people are going to say, “But what about Kai and Nya? Cole? Possibly Skylor?” And I know, I agree. Unfortunately, all the ninja had to grow up with something traumatic in their childhood (the only one who didn’t was Jay; though later he had to find out he was adopted, which stinks finding out the way he did. I’m just glad Ed & Edna were as amazing as they were <3). The one thing that all the rest of the ninja have besides Lloyd within these situations, is they all still had *someone*. Kai had Nya, Nya had Kai. Cole still had his father, even under the circumstances. Skylor still had her father and etc with the rest. Lloyd had *no one* as a kid, and it makes me want to give his little baby-self in seasons 1-2 a massive hug.

I remember when I watched seasons 1-7 (especially 1-2) as a middle schooler, I thought little and early-teen Lloyd was so annoying (still do). But now, years later, it makes me really sad to think about his story. He’s the only ninja who had received *no* love from his parents or anyone around him until he met the ninja, and even then he later had to learn what *that* meant and how to have self-love… which he still has trouble doing a lot of the time throughout all the seasons. It makes me want to give him an even bigger hug!

And one thing about Lloyd I truly admire, is even through all of this crap, he *still* cares about his mother and forgives her so easily! The way his mother abandoned him as a child I completely disagree with, and how she just left him saying she was doing it for “him” (even though it *really* was for herself), and yet he STILL treats her kindly and respectfully, which is amazing of him. Now I’m not saying you shouldn’t forgive, it’s just how he accepted it like a champ is something that is completely admirable. Especially with how young he really was…. You have to remember Lloyd was only around 10-ish years old around seasons 1-2, yet he was able to accept his mother with opened arms. And sure, he probably was only doing this because he was attention-starved (explains why he wanted to become like his father as a kid), emotionally-starved, and starved for love, yet still as he got older and probably realized this more and more about his mother and their relationship, he still has *always* treated her with respect and kindness. And sure, people within this fandom get mad at how bitty Lloyd acted, yet we also have to remember how he was raised, which really wasn’t being “raised” at all.

Then we go into Garmadon and Lloyd’s relationship, which is a whole other can of worms. Yet unlike Misako, Lloyd’s mother, as a fan I 100% respect Garmadon as a parental figure than I ever will for her. Sure, he’s the biggest and baddest villain throughout the series. And sure, he too abandoned his son; yet unlike Lloyd’s mother, Garmadon made *up* for that time lost, and personally, I give him my upmost respect for that. He gave his son what he was lacking in receiving from his parents, and actually *cared* enough to do that for Lloyd. He showed his son what if felt like to actually be loved by your parent (in his own ways of course), he gave his son attention, and he showed what it was like to have an emotional connection with your child. GARMADON ACTUALLY SOMEWHAT HAD A REASON TO ACT THE WAY HE DID, HE WAS BITTEN BY A SNAKE THAT MESSED HIM UP FOR LIFE, YET UNLIKE MISAKO HE *STILL* TREATED LLOYD MORE AMAZING THAN SHE EVER COULD. Yet instead, throughout the 5 most healthy seasons of Garmadon and Lloyd’s relationship, especially seasons (3-5), SHE DIDN’T EVEN PUT IN THE EFFORT TO MAKE THIS A FAMILY RELATIONSHIP! Instead, she was hanging with Wu, Lloyd’s uncle. And I know for a fact we *all* know something’s going on there, which as a kid I even noticed, and I absolutely hated even then!!! Misako would pop in like everything was fine and dandy every-so-often, and yet Lloyd STILL treated her amazingly!!! That’s why Lloyd is my favorite! No matter what anyone does to him, says to him, or how he is treated, he still cares for them! He still wants them to have a happy ending, and he hasn’t even had his yet. It makes me really happy that he had the opportunity to meet the ninja, because without them as the loving family they are, I don’t think he would *at all* be the same kind-hearted character he is. The real loving people in his life are the team, and even though this is all fake and just a “silly” cartoon as some would call it, I’m GLAD he was given such a loving atmosphere.

Then we go into Seasons 8-16. Lloyd grew up, finally caught up mentally to his body (which I found terrible that he had to go thru that, yet he STILL acted like a champ when there were no expectations to!!!) and this is where I like his character even more. Still, even through all the darkness and pain he had to go through growing up (it gets worse as he gets closer to adult-hood), he still acts amazing! His father now isn’t his real father anymore, his mother is completely gone into oblivion (gone like she always has been, pfft), and he falls in love with someone who manipulates him because she herself is broken! (And yes, I probably should say now that I do ship Llorumi. Some of you may think I’m crazy, which I am lol, but I also have my reasons for supporting it, and I will most likely (someday) make a post like this explaining why I do, but right now we’re focusing on Lloyd. ;)) Yet Lloyd *still* forgives, accepts, and loves!!! After years of thinking about and watching this show, I’ve finally narrowed it down to those three attributes within him that I’ve seen consistently throughout the series. I believe we should all look up to Lloyd for this! Just being able to forgive and love the same people who had hurt and abused him, is truly a wonderful thing a person can achieve!

Plus, Lloyd is also funny, entertaining, and would be an amazing person if he were to be real. Sure, he has his own stuff he stores deep inside of himself, and he probably jokes as much as he does because he’s trying to make everything look okay, but ya know what? That is some amazing writing right there! Being able to make a LEGO “CHILDREN’S” show entertaining for kids to watch, but it also is able to make the older audiences feel recognized and noticed in attributes and personalities within some Lego Ninja? That’s some crazy awesome writing! It truly shows how if the right minds are put together, a show for “kids” can turn out to be fun and *emotional* for us older audiences to watch because we see these characters within ourselves.

So there it is, my rant as to why I do really love Lloyd as a character and not just some “Lego Ninja.” There’s some others, I mean his personality in-show and mine irl match up pretty well, so there’s that lol. I also like how he sits and listens to your problems and gives advice. He honestly is ✨the man✨ But there’s also multiple other things I didn’t even get around to mentioning in here that I like about his character too! There’s so much to unpack it feels within these characters. It’s almost as if this show *isn’t* for kids anymore, and it’s growing along with the viewers, yet still pertains to the “children” mindset.

Anyways, I’ve already spent two hours of my life writing this, so I’ll stop haha. But if you made it this far, feel free to comment and tell me your thoughts. I’d love to know. :)

P.S. HoW iS LlOyD, a PlAsTiC LiTtLe LeGo So GoOd LoOkInG <3333

#ninjago #lego ninjago #lego #legophotography #legoart #lego photography #lego stop motion #legophoto #lego dreamzzz #funny #lego lloyd #ninjago lloyd #lloyd ninjago #lloyd garmadon #llorumi #harumi garmadon #sensei garmadon #emperor garmadon #ninjago garmadon #oni lloyd #lloyd x reader #shower thoughts #ninjago cole #ninjago kai #ninjago dragon #kai ninjago #ninjago fanart #jay ninjago #zane ninjago #ninjago zane

[thefangirlfever]

Trick or Treat (a Miguel O'Hara NSFW story)

Summary: One of your friends throw a Halloween Party and you meet a seducing masked guest. You both end up doing the monster (s)mash.

Content warning/ Disclaimer: I’ve been inspired by those Ghostface masks videos/ edits. Forgive me in advance.

Tags: Smut, F/M, piv penetration, doggy, improper use of a Halloween mask, fingering, freaky Miguel, everyone is kind of freaky I guess, she’s hot and pissed and on the pill, mirror sex

======

You’ve always loved Halloween, and that since you were a child. You remember Halloween nights spend trick or treating, watching spooky movies with your siblings, eating tons of candies, carving pumpkins and of course dressing up. Even nowadays, you were still enjoying Halloween. Many people would find this weird that an adult liked this celebration so much, but you just learned to enjoy new facets of this holiday. And in your eyes, nothing could top a good Halloween party.

So when you got invited by Jess, one of your colleague to her Halloween party, you were more than thrilled. Of course, you would go. In fact you even had multiple ideas about what costume you could wear.

Both of you were chatting in the break room when someone entered the room. It was an other one of your colleague. Miguel and you were working in the same department for almost a year by now and you may have had a slight crush on him. It’s been a few months since the both of you have been flirting from time to time, but never daring to cross the line. Jess had noticed this little game of yours and decided to tease you by asking him if he wanted to go to her party:

“Isn’t Halloween a children’s holiday?”, he simply answered, his brows furrowed.

You couldn’t hide your astonishment, neither hold your gasp, which made a small smirk bloom on Miguel’s face.

“Did I say something wrong?”, he asked.

“You never celebrate Halloween?”, you asked and he once again chuckled.

“Not really. Why would I do that? I’m not five anymore. Why? You celebrate Halloween?”

Jess didn’t let you answer:

“Actually we’re all going to celebrate it this year. And I’m sure Y/N is going to show up in one hell of a costume like she always does.” Your friend’s enthusiasm was maybe a little exaggerated. It was true you spend a lot of time and resources in your costumes, crafting them yourself. But in the end they still seemed pretty amateurish, just good enough for a party. But that seemed to piqued Miguel’s interest since he asked:

“You are all going dressed up? And what will you be this year, y/n?” He was probably expecting you to answer something like a cat or a witch. These were pretty classic costumes that you have done quite a few times, adding variations every time. You still liked these costumes but now, you wanted to try something else, something a little different. That’s why it took you so long to find an idea.

“Hum… I don’t know. I guess I should soon find an idea since Halloween is in a week but I really have no idea…” Your friend chuckled as she said:

“Sorry, y/n, I can’t help you this year, I’m doing a couple costume with my boyfriend.” She took a moment to think before adding “Why wouldn’t you actually dress up as one of your horror movies character? Like this guy, Ghost something?”

You understood that she was talking about Ghostface, the famous killer from Scream. It was true you liked those movies and it would be easy to find a mask. You thought about this option, but it didn’t convince you. It was too easy for you. No, you needed a real challenge this year. Something impressive.

You looked at Miguel who was still listening to both of you and looking in silence. When he caught your gaze, he simply gave you one smirk, one of those that would easily distract you at work, and said:

“I’m sure you’ll find something incredible. I can’t wait to see it.”

The night of the party quickly came, leaving you just enough time to make your costume. You had spend most your free time the week before Halloween sewing, stitching, trying out different make up… Of course you also bought a few materials like lenses, resin and fake blood. You also took some time during your break to sketch your costume, hiding it from curious eyes. Every time you were sketching or searching online for inspirations, you were remembering your conversation with Miguel and your friend.

What did he mean by “I can’t wait to see it?” Did it mean he would come to the party? If so, would he come dressed up? You had plenty ideas of how he could dress up. Who said only girls could wear sexy Halloween costumes?

It took you two hours to get ready before going to the Party. Your friend has decorated her house, inside as well as outside. Fake tombs were in the front yard and skeletons were sitting in the front porch. A fake giant spider was crawling up the walls and there was even an animatronic of a zombie screaming. Of course there were the iconic Jack O’lantern welcoming the guests.

Jess was not playing, but neither did you.

The moment you entered the house, you were welcomed by a loud Halloween playlist and flashy lights. Jess immediately jumped on you, fawning over your costume. You had chosen to be both the Little Red Riding Hood and the big bad wolf. The left part of your face was still normal, only a fake scar that you made yourself with fake blood and some resin spread across your cheek. One the right side you had used body paint, fake brows and more make up to mimic a werewolf-like creature. You were wearing fake claws, hairy wold ears, a black dress and of course a red hood that reached the floor, fully hiding you from behind.

“Y/n, that’s crazy! How long did it take you to make?” A few heads turned in your direction. You were a little flustered by this sudden attention but you didn’t mind after all. You worked for that.

Jess herself was all dressed in red with high heels, a form fitting dress and little horns, looking like a very convincing succubus. You guessed her boyfriend would be an angel, which made you smile since it matched so well their personalities.

“Well, a couple hours and let’s say that the Spirit Halloween employees know me well now.”

You both went to the living room as more spooky music was blasting. All around there were witches, ghosts, clowns… Everyone seemed chill and enjoying their evening. You spotted a large buffet filled with different dishes, sweets and alcohol. You rushed toward the large table, putting down the plate you had brought before pouring yourself a glass of beer.

You didn’t notice the presence next to you at first, since the person was silent, even though his frame was quite large. His, or her? You assumed it was a him, even if his face was hidden. Hidden behind a Ghostface mask. The person had chosen to wear the serial killer costume with the large black robe, the gloves and the mask, holding a plastic knife in his left hand. You gave him one polite smile as he took a candy out of a bowl.

Suddenly a fake spider jumped out of the bowl, straight from the candies. You already knew this trick unlike the guest. He jumped back, clearly surprised, which made you laugh. He then turned his head toward you, giving you a look you couldn’t quite read because of the mask, tilting his head on the side. He looked just like the killer in the movies with his mimics.

“Nice costume.”, you said with a smile before joining Jess. She was talking with her boyfriend which, you had guessed right, was dressed as an angel. When they both saw you, they complimented your costume, Jess having a small smirk on her lips. She gestured with her head toward the buffet.

“I guessed you met the mystery man, huh?”

“Hum, yes… Do you know who this is?” Your friend took a sip from her glass and simply answered:

“Take a guess.”

The evening was a lot of fun as everyone was playing pranks, dancing and getting drunk on chocolate and candies… or something else for some of the guests. A lot of people had complimented you on your costume and from time to time you were catching glances from the Ghostface guy. You had your guess on who it could be at this point of the evening, even if you didn’t dare to believe it.

At some point you had to go to the garage downstairs take some drinks. You were a little surprised to find the light already on in the stairs leading to the basement. The stairs were creaking under your steps as you noticed a figure already opening one of the fridges. A black robe, a white mask and gloves. The masked man turned around to face you as you reached the last steps of the staircase. You couldn’t hold back a grin as this scene reminded you so much of the movie, especially the scene before Tatum’s murder. You decide to say in a teasing tone:

“What are you going to do, mister Ghostface?”

He moved closer to you, stopping at a few steps away from you, his fake knife still in his hand, as if he was pondering what to do. You decide to close the distance between the both of you, your face a few inches from his mask.

“You’re really into character.”

He simply shrugged his shoulders. What if you were doing a mistake? It could be anybody else… As you were wondering what to do, he lifted one hand and let his fingertips graze your left cheek, the one with the fake blood. A thrilling sensation ran through your spine and a few goosebumps bloomed on your bare arms. Maybe it was the cold of the basement or the sensation of his gloves, but you felt a rush of adrenaline through your whole body.

“You’re not going to tell me your name?”, you whispered. A slight chuckle escaped the lips behind the mask. His chest heaves under the plane robe. You put your right hand on his broad chest, feeling the warmth of his body under your palm, your fake claws gripping slightly the fabric of the clothe.

“What should I do for you to take off the mask?”

Before he could even answer, you hear someone calling you upstairs. This definitely broke your moment as the two of you stepped back. You quickly took a few bottles before heading toward the stairs, giving him one teasing look.

It was already past midnight and you were sitting on the couch, sharing a few scary stories with some guests. Most people were still dancing and drinking. You had your fair share of candies and drinks and if you wanted to get back home, you had decided to stick to soda an hour ago. You looked at the clock on the wall before standing up and moving toward the staircase. Your eyes caught the mask of the so-called mysterious man. You both exchanged one look before going upstairs, giving him a signal to follow you.

You quickly went to the bathroom and when you were washing your hands, you heard someone knocking at the door. The door slowly opened at your voice and of course, it was Ghostface, his large silhouette filling up the door frame.

“Didn’t you forget something?”, you asked with a smile as you noticed that he had forgotten his knife downstairs. He simply chuckled before closing the door. The music was muffled behind the door as he moved closer to you. His hand found its place back on your cheek, your back against the sink.

“Are you really going to say nothing all night, Miguel?”

“How did you guess it was me?”, he simply replied. You grinned as you grip the edge of the sink.

“You really thought you were so clever that day when we talked about our costumes, huh? I must say that you managed to find something really fitting.” Miguel’s hands grabbed your hips as he moved closer.

“Well, I was hoping to find something you might like. I guess I made a good choice.”

You couldn’t deny that it was indeed a good choice coming from him. His fingers were playing with the fabric of your dress, feeling your hips underneath, holding you in place.

“Since you have guessed it, maybe I should take off the mask?”

Your hands grabbed the front of his clothe, pulling him closer while you answered under your breath:

“Please, keep it.”

Even if you couldn’t see his face, you knew exactly what expression he had. You already saw this little grin of him so many times, but never in those conditions.

“I would have never guessed you could like that.” He said in a playful voice that confirmed to you that he was definitely smiling under that mask.

“Well, it’s less about the mask and more about who’s under it… or what he can do with it…”

“And what should I do then?” His deep voice sends shivers down your arms as you still held him close to you, his body towering you. You noticed how he was still wearing his gloves.

“Maybe you should take these off first. I don’t think you will need them later.”, you said with a snicker. He then lifted one of his hands and said with in a neutral tone, his voice slightly deeper than usual.

“Take them off.”

You immediately understood what he meant as you started taking off his glass with your mouth, using your teeth to pull at the fabric, finger after finger, carefully not to bite him. Once his hands were exposed, he pressed two of his fingers against your lips and said in the same voice:

“Open up.”

His fingers entered your mouth in one swift motion despite their size, forcing a moan out of you. He let you suck on them for a good minute while rubbing the front of his body against yours. He was still holding your waist and you could feel his fingers applying more pressure on your clothed skin as well as his growing erection. You moaned once again at the sensation, your lips still closed around his fingers. He chuckled under his mask:

“You are going to wait just a little more before I give it to you.” He suddenly took his fingers off your mouth with a wet ‘plop’, leaving a trail of saliva connecting your skins. It felt like something was missing inside of you.

“Since you prepped them so well, I might as well use these. What do you think?”, he asks. You could only nod at him. He proceeded to lift the fabric of your skirt, high enough to expose your legs, your thighs and your underwear. You grabbed the hem of the skirt, allowing him to roam freely among your skin. His hands grabbed firmly your thighs, kneading the plush skin with his thumbs, slowly moving closer to your hip crease.

His left thumb brushed against the fabric of your panties. You knew it was not a mistake coming from him and you were waiting for more. Yet, his fingers resumed touching your thighs, feeling them up as much as he wanted. You were growing hotter, more pissed and impatient. With one call of his name, he lifted his head up to look at you. He knew you were frustrated, wanting for more.

“Tell me how bad you want it.”

Oh, so he knew what he was doing. You grinned at his words, replying:

“I would have never guessed you could like that.” He stopped moving his hands, his unreadable look on his mask, waiting for you to tell him exactly what he wanted to hear.

“Touch me Miguel.”

“I’m already touching you.”, he answered in a playful tone. You rolled your eyes, your grin still on your face.

“Touch me there please.”

“There?”, he asked, while squeezing your thighs.

“No…”

“There?”, the pads of his thumbs slide along your hip crease, almost joining on your core.

“Almost there…”

His index slipped under the fabric of your panties, dragging it along and exposing your swollen labia. The cold air of the bathroom hit your already hot womanhood. Miguel took a moment to contemplate it before his finger slid along it, up and down, spreading your wetness over your folds. You gripped the sink behind you tighter as Miguel’s fingers kept moving down your body. He slowly inserted one of his fingers between your lips, inclining his wrist so that his palm would rub against your mound, pressing against your lower belly.

His name was already on your lips among whimpers and moans. As you kept praising him, he slipped a second finger inside you. He was pumping his fingers inside you with such determination that you lower back started hitting the sink. You moved your hips at the same pace than his fingers. When the thumb of his other hand started rubbing and flicking your clit, you slowly began to lose it. You felt your arousal growing inside yourself as you were getting hotter, a knot tightening inside your lower belly.

Miguel kept thrusting his fingers in and out until your juice was leaking down your thighs. You could hear your body making lewd, wet noises, thankful that the music downstairs was hiding this. At some point, Miguel’s hooked fingers found a sensitive spot inside you, going deeper, ant he hit quite a few times, making you moan his name.

“You look so pretty like that. Gosh, you’re so tight…”, you felt your thighs squeezing his fingers, trapping them inside yourself. Miguel’s face nuzzled against the crook of your neck. It was so hard for him to just stay like that, as he wanted so much more of you. He was a little afraid to admit it, to admit how bad he’d been wanting this for months. The two of you had been flirting for so long, turning around one another without daring to make any move, afraid of these feelings you had. Miguel was afraid he wouldn’t be able to live up to your expectations. The image he had forged of himself at work was one of a cold and serious man, not what he was giving to you right now. And yet, you didn’t seem to mind. In fact your blissful expression with your eyelids partially closed, your lips parted, breathing slowly… made him regret not making this sooner. You threw your arms around his shoulders, trying to get steadier as he whispered in your ear:

“I wish we had done that earlier.”

“I think we can still make up for that lost time.”, you answered under your breath. Miguel’s fingers stopped moving inside you, not daring to fully understand what you just said.

“Are you sure you want this?”

You answered with an alluring smile: “Yes, I’m sure about this.”

“Is it OK if I…” You chuckled at his question.

“It’s OK. I’m on the pill.” His hands immediately grabbed your hips and turned you around, your front facing the mirror on top of the sink. Your hands grabbed the edges of the sink as he lifted up your skirt and slid down your panties. You heard the sound of a belt unbuckling and turned your head to watch him. Miguel caught your eyes and with a groan, he grabbed your chin between two of his fingers, making you look back at the mirror.

“I want you to see how beautiful you are in this moment.” You felt his erect member press against your skin, teasing your entrance before he added: “How do you want it?”

“Bad. The worst you can do.” His fingers slid down your face, your neck, pressing gently his fingers against your skin, before he dragged them lower until they rested on top of one of your covered breasts.

“We can stop anytime you want…”, he said carefully. You shivered under his touch as he started penetrating you. You moaned at the sensation, your hands tightening around the edges of the sink. His right hand was groping your thigh while his other hand squeezed your breast. Miguel started moving into you, reaching for the same sensitive spot than he did earlier. Your could feel your body pressed against the sink, the cold against your hot and sensitive spot. He finally started moving faster, the sound of both your skins hitting one another.

“You feel so good…” Miguel’s soft praise was a harsh contrast with his rough movements. You could feel his chest pressed against your back, feel how warm his body was. You needed more, you wanted to know how his skin felt. With one of your hands, you grabbed his mask and took it off.

Both your faces appeared in the mirror. Miguel’s hair was messy, his cheeks flushed and his eyes half closed. You were both panting and moaning like two messes. One of your hands caressed his cheek, feeling how warm and soft his skin was. Miguel’s lips reached for your palm, kissing it gently while he kept thrusting into you. His mouth then reached for your neck, crashing onto your skin. His kiss was messy, his tongue darting out, licking and sucking on you. He may leave a few marks on your skin, but you didn’t mind. You both have waited too long for this.

You could feel your pleasure rising in your body, your legs slightly shaking as Miguel hit your cervix multiple times with all his strength. Tears were falling down your face, smearing your make up, as you bend over the sink. Your orgasm washed over you while Miguel held you tight, kissing fervently your neck.

The two of you were still in the bathroom as the obnoxious music of the party made its way through the closed door. Miguel helped you adjust your costume, cleaning off the make up stains on your face. He seemed groggy from his own orgasm he had reached just after you. With a quick kiss, he whispered, close to your lips:

Thanks for reading this mess and going through this. As you can see, it was my first attempt at writing something a little spicier with a more ‘dominant’ Miguel (which I usually don’t like much). I’m not sure I did it right and I tried my best.

“I think I finally understand why you love Halloween so much.”

=======

And for the record, I wanted to call the story Make me (S)cream (I like bad puns).

But, most importantly…

Happy Halloween, folks!

#across the spiderverse #miguel o'hara #astv miguel #spiderman 2099 #miguel x reader #fanfic #halloween #spiderverse #atsv miguel #miguel o'hara smut #ghostface #scream

[jarofstyles]

FICTOBER DAY 10- Lifetimes

FICTOBER Prompts/Masterlist

Patreon

warnings- mentions of witchcraft, they are witches lol

------

“How many lifetimes do you think it took to find each other?”

Fingers intertwined, Harry laid with Y/N against his chest as they gazed into the roaring fire in front of them. The man’s wool cloak rested over the both of them, preserving warmth. It was cold but neither of them felt an inkling of wanting to retreat indoors. Their bound hands rested against the girl’s tummy, the sparks of the wood floating up in the air to mimic fireflies. 

“I’m not sure.” Harry’s voice warmed her ear. “I’d like to think that we found each other in every lifetime, but this is the destined one.” The witches knew they had a soul tie, the overwhelming peace filling their beings when they had found one another a telltale key. Soul mates, twin flames, the real ones. Their first meeting had been overwhelming in the best way. Happening by chance during all hallows eve, the festivities in full swing as the even fuller moon hung ripe in the sky. Y/N had been selling her enchanted flower crowns to the humans, and Harry had wandered over. Time had stopped when they’d locked eyes, but the need to act calm had repressed the true joy she felt when he had lit up. The subtle golden glow from his being which surely was replicated in her own, other witches watching with bated breaths as the humans remained none the wiser as Harry stalked slower and slipped into her tent, pulling her into his embrace. 

The golden glow showing it was their time. Their past lifetimes of near misses, they’d not been in vain. Their eternal lives would continue, no chance of death unless they both will it. Finding your Eternal, it was a celebrated occurrence. The magick soul develops for as many lifetimes as it takes for them to be ready to join with another. They’d have to have had at least a few. 

“Honestly?” His words caught her from her thoughts, making her turn slightly to look at him. His nose pink tipped, hair falling into his face and stubble on his upper lip making her thank the tiny bit of humanity that continued on with witches. “I would wait every lifetime to end up with you.” His voice was hushed, the forest around them quiet as the creatures listened in. “I’ve never felt a joy like this in my days. I know our lifetimes beforehand were wildcards but… I have you, my eternal partner, and we will make a life together. The moon and gods give us our lifetimes before to develop us into good enough beings to continue to shape the world as we know it, as witches and witchcraft become a baseline of the world like it used to…” He played with her amethyst ring. “I could not ask for a better companion to spend the rest of days with. To learn your magic and teach you my own as our souls blend and connect.” 

“I enjoy being able to light a fire with a snap.” Y/N did admit, rubbing her cool nose against his own. “And I know you must enjoy being able to speak with some of the creatures.” Harry’s elemental magic and Y/N’s plant and animal abilities had begun to blend into their own abilities, giving them control of everything they needed. Eternal pairs matched to provide the world what they needed. 

“Well.. I do admit you’ve been able to light a fire in me since we met. It may have taken a while for our abilities to combine, but for us to still be learning and loving? I understand now. Why they make us wait.” He paused. “I could never forgive myself for being given your heart wrapped up in clover and petals, and dropping it because I hadn’t learned the proper way to hold it. Our lifetimes before were painful without our union, but… This one is what all the pain has led to.” Arms around her tightened as she smiled shyly, chapped lips pressing to the corners of her own as the fire roared hotter. “I’d go a million more years, thousands of kilometers if I knew you were at the finish line, my love. You were worth the wait.” 

#jarofstyles #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles one shot #harry styles fanfic #harry styles smut #harry writing #harry styles imagine #harry drabble #harry styles blurb #harry styles writing #Harry styles Halloween #harry styles halloween blurb #Harry styles Halloween one shot #fictober #jarofstyles fictober 2023 #jarofstyles fictober #Harry styles au #Harry smut #Harry fluff #Harry angst #Harry styles fluff #Harry styles angst

[alagaesia-headcanons]

you know, we have only Oromis words to tell how was Morzan when he was a kid, how can we be sure that he doesn't' exaggerate? Morzan was a rebellious kid, who could be rude and maybe cruel? A lot of kids can be cruels, it's doesn't mean they're fully bad from the start. I just think that Morzan had need of a parental figure who would correct his attitude and would CARE for him, because it what Oromis should have been: a teacher AND a parental figure since the kid was 10 when he took him.

YES THIS I 100% agree with you!! Forgive me for the very long rant I’m about to go on because I have many thoughts about Morzan that I’ve wanted to get down for a long while now. I find it super interesting to interpret that he wasn’t entirely malicious or irredeemable from the outset.

I really, REALLY don’t like the old order of Riders. From all the things we learn about them, they had a seriously objectionable system. The way they took human kids when they were 10 years old and then left them to the discretion of people like Oromis is brazen evidence of that. I’m really intrigued by the possibility that at least one of the Forsworn joined Galbatorix to dismantle the Riders out of a genuine aversion to their abuse and a desire to put an end to it and build something better, not just from a personal lust for power.

Given the way Galbatorix talks to Oromis and Nasuada, I think he would have presented his intentions that way to distract from his real deranged vengefulness. It would have fascinating implications for any of the Forsworn to have truly fallen for that, and then as the consequences of their actions fully unfold and Galbatorix becomes an even worse tyrant, for that Forsworn to burn with regret and resentment and hatred towards him. It would make for such an interesting dynamic during the Empire’s reign. I just want one disloyal Forsworn who hates Galbatorix because they feel tricked and used, it’d be cool!!!

Admittedly, Morzan is the only one of the Forsworn we have any background for at all, so it doesn’t mean much to say he’s the best fit, but the backstory we do have can potentially line up with that role very well. Morzan was very young when he met Galbatorix, and thus inexperienced and impressionable. He spent more time with him and would have been exposed to a lot more of his manipulation. And I think he would have reason to be predisposed against the Riders before they met, a resentment Galbatorix could have fueled for his own benefit.

I’ve made it no secret how much I loathe Oromis. Tbh the fact that Morzan spent years training under him is a huge reason why I’m able to sympathize with him lmao. I would also start killing people. That man could have never given the necessary care and tolerance and emotional support to a ten year old, but it seems like the new Riders were entrusted entirely to their mentors. We see how horribly Oromis mistreats Eragon and how that affects him even when he’s sixteen- his callous neglect inflicted on ten year old children is a disaster waiting to happen, especially if any of those kids weren’t well cared for to begin with.

Also, this is slightly pedantic, but when Oromis is talking about Morzan, he specifically says that he “grew so proud and cruel,” which implies that this issue was less significant or not there at all when he first took Morzan. His harmful behaviors apparently developed over time which should be addressed and cared for by whoever’s raising him. Oromis is the only one in a position to raise him and he still turns a blind eye to Morzan.

In my headcanons, Morzan grew up impoverished and neglected. He doesn’t know what fair and caring treatment looks like and so he also can’t identify Oromis’s abuse, but its impact is compounding on an already present wound. Morzan is starving to make something of himself because no one has acknowledged and loved him for who he already is, which makes for a horribly volatile mixture with Oromis’s penchant for demanding his students prove themselves against an arbitrary and merciless standard. Morzan’s susceptibility to Oromis’s pressure makes him viciously desperate to prove himself, intensely competitive, and highly reactive to disapproval. It creates a perception of inadequacy that bleeds into everything Morzan does.

When he’s unpressured and at ease, Morzan’s nature is actually quite reserved, slow, passive, and methodical, but he is so, so easily incensed. Because he’s so fixated on proving himself, he assumes everyone initially holds a very low opinion of him and that’s what necessitates he fight for approval. He just can’t fathom receiving acceptance, respect, or care without proving he deserves it, and so he’s perpetually clawing for more. And falling short feels so devastating because he’s never been shown his worth beyond people’s expectations.

To me, that’s why he ends up attached to someone like Brom, who idolizes and defers to him. For Morzan, it would feel like his endless efforts to prove himself have actually proven something. Because he thinks he has to earn love, Brom’s affection would also feed into Morzan’s ego, providing a long desired vindication. The fact that Oromis trains both of them makes their relationship so much worse. I feel like his relatively positive relationship with Brom could have balanced out and helped Morzan adjust with time, but there’s an unfortunate competitive aspect at play. As Morzan scrambles for Oromis’s approval, now Brom is also being trained and the differences between them present another metric that could make Morzan seem lesser. So he puts Brom down and fights against him for their master’s care and validation like they’re limited commodities.

I think, over time, Morzan comes to recognize elements of Oromis’s abuse. He simply doesn’t have the energy to constantly struggle for his approval forever, and as that starts to run dry, it reveals some things. He resents that Oromis belittles his struggles and only values efforts that yield the results he wants, so he stops putting in the effort. If Morzan still doesn’t matter to him after trying so hard, why should he keep trying? He hates that Oromis can never give a true justification for the standards he demands they reach, and he starts ignoring them. He despises how he lies when says he cares for him and wants the best for him, because he prioritized his utility to the Riders over his well being in every moment since they met.

So, when he meets Galbatorix, Morzan is bitterly resentful and disillusioned. He joins him out of desire for revenge on Oromis and to tear down the system that abandoned him to his abuse. I do believe Morzan genuinely loved Brom in a certain way, despite his mistreatment, and he starts trying to incite him against Oromis not solely because of his own vindictiveness but also out of concern for Brom. As Galbatorix’s plans start to move, Morzan balks and begins seriously doubting him, even more so as the scope of slaughter unfolds, but he swallows his misgivings and stays determined to recruit Brom to the winning side. When one of the Forsworn kills the first Saphira despite Morzan’s insistence they be spared, he’s vehemently outraged. I think of Galbatorix’s disinterest in his uproar as the turning point in Morzan’s loyalty to him. As the Empire takes form, that disloyalty solidifies and Morzan hates Galbatorix for being even more cruel, manipulative, and uncaring than the people he wanted revenge on. Galbatorix tolerates it because forcing his vengeful resentment into subservience gratifies his sadistic impulse.

Now all of this is well within the realm of extrapolation and interpretation- none of these details directly suggest this version of Morzan’s character and motivations. They give the potential, but not real support, and they can just as easily be seen in any number of different ways. However, there is one single thing that actually grounds this in canon, which is that Morzan was a name-slave from very early on. When Eragon is telling Murtagh about the chance to change his true name and challenges his hesitation, Murtagh says, “[Galbatorix] has been creating name-slaves for over a hundred years, ever since he recruited our father.”

This detail fascinates me. There is the possibility that it’s a lie, but I can’t imagine Murtagh would make it up considering how much distaste he expresses towards his father. And I don’t think it would make sense for Galbatorix to lie to Murtagh about it either. If he didn’t actually have control over Morzan’s name then, claiming he did would discredit that real loyalty Morzan would have had to feel for him and his cause to do everything of his own free will. I think it’s the truth. Galbatorix learned Morzan’s true name more than a hundred years ago, before the fall, when he recruited him- which, to me, feels like before Morzan even helped him steal Shruikan’s egg.

Morzan either knew his true name already or Galbatorix went through his mind to find out, and the latter seems far more likely. Given the way Morzan’s described: young, arrogant, weak minded- I highly doubt he knew and the way Murtagh brings this up implies Galbatorix’s skill at uncovering names. Morzan either felt so loyal to Galbatorix at that point that he willingly let him in his mind, he was coerced into agreeing to it, or Galbatorix did it by force.

This still doesn’t mean Morzan wanted to dismantle the broken parts of the Riders instead of fully destroying them and that Galbatorix manipulated him into starting a war he found appalling- but it makes that idea much more feasible. If Morzan did realize Galbatorix’s intentions weren’t what he said and that he didn’t want to take things so far, he couldn’t back out. Any reluctance or disagreement would have been overridden and things would unfold exactly how they did.

I think Morzan was wounded and angry and starving for true respect and care that lured him to Galbatorix, and the precarious pride he clung to made him look away from the severity of Galbatorix’s actions. Then he realized his desperation was preyed upon only when it was far too late.

#eragon #inheritance cycle #morzan #oromis #galbatorix #brom #answered ask #anon im sorry i think this might have been more than you bargained for lmao #im a little insane about this #but this concept captivated me and i wont let go of it now #also im quite tempted to write a fic of young morzan and brom. i have scenes in my brain

[shikai-the-storyteller]

UEUEUEUEUEUEU ILL SEND YOU THIS WHILE WAITING TO SEE BOBBYS STATUS.

Dw idm u answering publicly, I want everyone to be cursed w the thought that Rubius is a babygirl and a very bad one at that <3

Honestly I've only read a few explanations of their lore and bits about their relationship but they seem sooooo,,, /pos. Like they have such a fun and silly dynamic that has this air of toxicity and their loves feels quite self destructive bc rubius is kind of a destructive force of nature of a person who has a tendency to hurt those around him, perhaps as a defense mechanism or perhaps out of simply not understanding there are consequences to the things he does while vegetta is someone far too forgiving, he continues to love rubius despite how much he hurts himself, others, and vegetta himself. I'm not saying cubito rubius is an awful person but from what I've seen he is,,, complex. Difficult despite seeming silly. I could be just completely wrong tho LOL I am doin my best I prommy

ANYWAYS IM CHEERING U ON IN WRITING!!! I'd love to talk to u abt them more and learn more abt rubegetta bc like. Look. Theres no way q!vegetta isnt hung up on that demon idc,,,

I'm likewise waiting for the Eggstatistics (which will probably get posted while I'm in the middle of writing this) (EDIT: IT DID) and you gave me the opportunity to infodump so prepare for an essay LMAO

There are SO many layers to Rubius and Vegetta’s relationship (both romantic and friendship-wise), and that complexity makes them fascinating characters to study. I’ve been discussing this a lot in private lately, but I feel like there’s quite a bit of misinformation / misinterpretations of Rubius and Vegetta’s relationship amongst some of the newer fans who might not know some key components of their personality and their relationship dynamic as a whole (which is understandable since the majority of their lore came from Karmaland, and a lot of newer fans only speak English / only watch QSMP), so ALLOW ME TO ELABORATE:

I think of the two, Rubius definitely gets mischaracterized the most (which, again, maybe isn't too surprising since not everyone watched Karmaland and he hasn't been on the QSMP server too much lately). I could go off on a tangent here and list my frustrations about the people who harassed him for his role / his actions during the Egg event / whining about ships to the point where he decided not to log into the server again ‘til the Egg event is over, but that's ultimately irrelevant to this discussion.

“Their love feels quite self-destructive” is a really good way to sum things up, because Rubius is a pretty self-destructive man. Rubius is, fundamentally, a man who is full of love for the people he cares about, but those feelings are in direct conflict with his reluctance to let people get close to him (and his commitment issues). He can freely give hugs and kisses (and more) to Vegetta, but when it comes to expressing his true thoughts and feelings, he’s pretty emotionally constipated. We’ve already seen this a few times on the QSMP server – when Rubius visits on Vegetta’s birthday, he sings him the most beautiful heartfelt love song ever, but as soon as it’s over and Vegetta tries to talk to him, Rubius runs away. Even in Karmaland V, when hooked up to a lie detector and asked about his feelings for Vegetta, Rubius tried to wiggle his way out of answering. Only when the world was literally ending and they all thought they were gonna die did Rubius finally admit his feelings, shouting his confession and his love for Vegetta at the top of his lungs.

(The real tragedy here is that it was so chaotic with everyone shouting, Vegetta never heard his words…)

Although it’s easy to slap the label “toxic” on Rubius, I think that’s unfair to him and his character, as well as his intentions. He truly does love Vegetta with all his heart, in every universe, and he doesn’t want to hurt him, but Rubius doesn’t want to get hurt either. The Meteor shower conversation gives us a clear understanding of that:

Rubius: I don't want to get hurt. I don't want to get my hopes up, and then get hurt. It's happened to me many times before. Especially here in Karmaland. Vegetta: Have you had lovesickness? Rubius: Yes. In Karmaland, everywhere, in real life... I'm already used to getting beaten. Vegetta: That's a pity... Rubius: I just want someone to take care of me, and that's it. I don't ask for much. Vegetta: I'm very protective.

The way I see it, Rubius is afraid of his feelings for Vegetta, because the larger his love grows, the larger that potential for hurt and disappointment gets. Does this excuse all his actions? No, of course not, however there’s a big difference between doing something out of self-preservation (possibly as a trauma-response, depending on how you interpret his character) and doing something with the intent to hurt someone.

IMO, Rubius isn’t a toxic guy, he just needs therapy.

Vegetta doesn’t get mischaracterized quite as often, though I do feel like people have a tendency to put him on a pedestal and minimize the flaws he has. I’m a massive Vegetta fan, but this guy’s far from perfect. He’s self-centered, borderline narcissistic sometimes, and he’s a very prideful man. He’s never left Rubius at the altar, but he’s still had his fair share of “oopsies” and "yikes" in their relationship. One (which I’m surprised people don’t talk about more) is an incident from Karmaland IV where Vegetta, very unhinged and mentally unstable at the time, kidnapped Rubius’ wife Nieves and threatened her with a sword, saying, “If Rubius can’t be mine, he can’t be anyone’s.”

For the longest time I genuinely thought that line came from a fanfic or something, then I stumbled upon the clip one day and I was just like:

Anyways

In Karmaland V, Rubius became very close with a little alien child named Titi. He took care of Titi like he was his own son, and despite his attempts at emotionally distancing himself early on so he wouldn’t get attached, Rubius wound up caring a lot for him.

Then Titi died.

It was basically Rubius’ worst nightmare come to life – he’d let himself get close to Titi, he’d loved him unconditionally and let Titi into his heart, and Titi’s death utterly destroyed him. Everyone in Karmaland was affected by the death, but Rubius took it especially hard because of how close they were. Rubius was hurting badly and resorting to terrible coping strategies to deal with the pain, and Vegetta…

Well. Vegetta wasn’t very nice about it.

There are a lot of ways we could interpret Vegetta’s actions and words during this time – maybe he’s not super sensitive when talking about death since he’s probably some kind of demigod, maybe he speedran the grieving process, maybe he thought brutal honesty and direct action would help Rubius “snap out of it” sooner. However you see it, ultimately it did a lot more harm than good for Rubius’ overall mental health.

I bring these examples up not to paint their relationship as toxic or negative, but rather to express just how complex it is. Because, despite all their mistakes and drama and heartbreak, at the end of the day, Rubius and Vegetta still love each other more than anything else. Even towards the end of Karmaland V when they were quite literally on opposite sides of the battlefield (one supporting Quackity, the other supporting Luzu), their true loyalties lay with one another. When Rubius was hit by an enemy, Vegetta defended him with his life, and when Vegetta was hurt, Rubius did the same.

Yes, Rubius doesn't really know how to handle healthy relationships, and yes, Vegetta tends to forgive him too easily, but that doesn't erase the love they have. The key we need to remember here is that Rubegetta is a telenovela that sits squarely in the romcom category. They may wander into other genres and tropes from time to time, but they will always gravitate back to one another. Whether you define that as fate or soulmates or just sheer dumb luck, the facts remain and the love is there.

PHEW anyways that felt good to get out, I have so many thoughts on Rubegetta so I appreciate the excuse to rant. I'm always happy to chat about these two! :D And you're so right - Vegetta is so smitten for that demon, I hope he gets to meet the angel too. I hope Rubius comes back soon so Vegetta can see his Osito Fiu Fiu, but in the meantime, we'll have to keep wishing and praying just like Vegetta...

(ALSO THANK YOU the current chapter of that dang Rubegetta fic is kicking my butt rn because it's the only chapter I didn't outline and life events keep interrupting me when I try and work on it, but it IS getting chipped away at bit by bit! I hope folks enjoy the outcome when it's released :D)

#Karmaland #QSMP #Rubius #Vegetta777 #Rubegetta #Vegetta #i talk #qsmp talk #ethogirlie #replies #QSMP Analysis

[hellfiresmanicfae]

Vampravenwolf

I’m not soft

Hello, this is the first Wednesday Fanfic I’ve written and actually posted. Please forgive me if this sucks or there are any errors I wrote this in the span of an hour and I have not posted an fanfics I have written online in years.

This is based on the idea of Wednesday Enid and Yoko dating inspired by @caitlynskitten featuring baby Wednesday. (She is baby)

Wednesday walked through the halls of Nevermore with her plush raven tucked away safely in her bag. The petite girl was on her way to her last class of the day, which was sadly on the other side of campus far away from her two girlfriends classes. As she glided through the halls she caught a piece of two student’s conversation, a conversation that happened to be about her. She then paused her journey to class in order to eavesdrop on the conversation in which she could make out the words

“Wednesdays gone soft”. And while the girl knew it to be somewhat true the raven was under the impression that she was only soft with Yoko and Enid, she didn’t think anybody else would have picked up on the matter. The gothic girl wanted to be good for her mommy and daddy, however she also couldn’t just let this go and let people continue to think such things about her. In her mind it was settled she would be doing something about this. She was normally very calculated in her revenge plots, but this was a more impulsive revenge plot, no planning and maybe not the best way she could have gotten the outcome she desired, however in her mind this needed to be taken care of immediately. With little to no planning she made her way over to the two gorgons when they had their backs turned to her. When she was standing behind them, whispering random words in Latin. The two boys were rightfully startled be her presence and began freaking out trying to get her to tell them what was going on and what she was saying.

“just a basic curse, have a dreadful day” she said monotonously before finishing her journey to class. It wasn’t a real curse she just wanted to inflict fear in them giving them a bit of lasting paranoia.

“That should take care of it” Wednesday thought as she sat down at her desk. About ten minutes into class her internal celebration was cut short when she was called into Principal Weems office. The young raven made her way to the principal’s office taking a seat in her usual chair in front of Weems desk.

“Really Wednesday, a curse you know I really thought you had been making amazing progress in accepting your Nevermore family, then you pull this stunt, I am very disappointed in you”

Wednesday could feel the tears forming behind her eyes, but pushed them back or she would just be proving the gorgon’s point.

“He called me soft” Wednesday said her voice slightly cracking.

“That’s no excuse miss Addams you put a curse on two of your classmates, there is no excuse for that” Weems exclaimed pacing back and forth through her office.

“Well you can relax, I didn’t actually curse them I just wanted to scare them” Wednesday fired back.

“God Wednesday, you can’t do that, you need to learn your actions have consequences”. At that point Wednesday could no longer hold back her tears, as she began sobbing. All she could think about is how disappointed her mommy and daddy are gonna be in her. Weens had seen Wednesday cry a few times but was still not used to it. She knew the only way to calm the crying raven was to call Enid and Yoko to her office, however the shapeshifter was hesitant to do that after the threats she faces from the vampire and werewolf last time she made the young seer cry. She pushed back her fear, being that the wellbeing of her student was more important. Weems then called both girls to her office as she awaited their arrival she sat down next to the dark girl who was now hugging her beloved raven plush, while rocking back and forth.

“Wednesday will you look at me” Weems says. The small girl halts her rocking slowly looking at the tall women.

Weems then proceeds to tell the much smaller girl “ given that you didn’t actually curse that you didn’t actually curse the two boys, I’m gonna let this one slide, but next time I hear about you doing anything like this you will be given detention, and just for the record I don’t think you’ve gone soft your just evolving”

Wednesday sniffled quietly before saying “so I assume you’re gonna tell the two gorgons they are not cursed”.

Weems took a minute to think over her options before saying “No, I don’t think I will, but if you do this again I will be spilling your little secret about these curses”

“But why?” The pale girl asked.

“Because I’m rooting for your success and I don’t think telling those boys is going to help your success and as long as there not really cursed there’s no harm In not telling them, hopefully it will discourage them from talking behind peoples backs and other students from trying to mess with you” Weems said.

At that moment Enid and Yoko showed up.

“What’s going on, is she okay?” Enid said trying to mask the worry in her voice.

“I think everything is okay now” Weems responded.

At that point the bell releasing the rest of the students from their last class of the day rang.

May I ask what happened, why is Wednesday in your office” Yoko asked.

“Wednesday had overheard two students taking, and long story short she heard one of them say she was going soft, so she thought she would take matters into her her own hands and make them think she put a curse on them, but everything is fine, nobody was harmed and no curses were made, and Wednesday is not being punished unless this kind of thing occurs again so the tree of you are free to go and enjoy the rest of your day”

“Okay, thank you Miss Weems, we’ll get out of your hair now”. Enid said.

“Come on baby” Yoko said calling her girlfriend over. Wednesday then gets up and runs over to her two girlfriends grabbing both of their hands and making their way out of the office and back to their room. As soon as the door closes Wednesday starts crying saying “I’m sorry, I just don’t want people to think I’m soft.

Enid comes up to the shorter girl hugging her from behind, while Yoko cups Wednesday’s face in her hands making the small girl look up at her.

“Mommy and I know you don’t want people to think you’re soft but you can’t pretend to curse someone, or really curse someone or anything of the sort. Since when do you care what people think about you, you can’t let what people say get to you. You are amazing, strong, and beautiful and nothing anyone says about you will ever change that or anything about who you are, just be true to yourself you know the real you, I know the real you, and mommy knows the real you and that’s what matters.” Yoko says.

“Daddy and I love you little raven, whether your weak or strong cause to us no matter what you will be perfect.” Enid says reassuring Wednesday and backing up what Yoko had said.

#vampravenwolf #wednesday #little raven #baby Wednesday

[nobodysdaydreams]

Thoughts on Narnia Adaptations

I know I’ve briefly mentioned the pros and cons of someone writing about Susan’s story, and yes I have so many thoughts about that. But do you know what else I have thoughts about fellow Narnia fans?

A movie or tv series about the Ketterley family: Letty, Andrew, and Mable (Digory’s mom).

Because Uncle Andrew gave us one chapter of absolute insanity with his whole “I had an evil fairy godmother who did hard time in prison. She taught me dark magic and I stole a box of magic dust from Atlantis (which is real btw) from her on her death bed and broke a promise just so I could make some sparkly jewelry in my sister’s attic and perform experiments on guinea pigs and children. I’ve traveled the world and discovered secrets you fools could only dream of and learned terrible things!”

…and then never brought any of that stuff up again, or explained it. How much is real? How much is him just making stuff up? It would not surprise me if Uncle Andrew took that box to a charlatan who was like “oh uh… it’s um… Atlantean for sure” and Uncle Andrew was like “haha… I knew it!” (Also what was Andrew like as a kid, did he make his evil fairy godmother curse other students in his class because I feel like he would).

And while we’re on the subject of people who likely lied about or exaggerated a lot of their backstory: Jadis. I don’t know who remembers her whole: “I had an evil older sister who was so much worse than me, and it was all her fault. I might have committed omnicide, but that was only because she drove me to it by challenging me for no reason like an idiot (and she was always weak you know. She never even considered that I or anyone else would actually use omnicide to win a war. What a short-sighted fool). But now she and every other life form that ever existed on the planet are 100% dead. No one escaped I made sure of that we have no portals or magic rings here children, and no one is more powerful than me.”

…uh, yeah… right… your sister who was worse than you, yet “too weak” for omnicide. She might have also been evil or done bad things, I’m not discounting that, but forgive me if I don’t take Jadis and Andrew entirely at their word.

#Long post #I just know they lied #Jadis because she’s a liar and Andrew because he has no idea what he’s even talking about #And there are ways to connect their stories I’m sure (have fun rotating those in your brain) #But at the very least I need to see Andrew’s backstory I just know the kid was a menace #His sisters were probably so embarrassed of him #Little did they know it would only get so much worse #jadis #jadis the white witch #the white witch #charn #chronicles of narnia #narnia #the chronicles of narnia #uncle andrew #susan pevensie #Narnia adaptations #cs lewis

[ufo-ikawa]

hi, this is me ari.

you’ll have seen that i deactivated my accounts, both my main and my personal. i ran away from everything as fast as i could which was cowardly, and i don’t expect forgiveness at all, but this is an attempt at exposing everything. please share with everyone who read the fics and/or interacted with me.

in november 2021, i opened up ufo-ikawa. i had originally started with writing my own works, because i just wanted to write and join a fandom i really liked— then it snowballed. i have always felt my own writing was bad, and could never live up to others so i did what any pathetic person would do. i stole works from people who’s writing i admired and wanted to be like. (i also had another blog onigiri-mia which was deactivated due to death threats i was receiving daily regarding old drama, and stolen works were also posted there). instead of gaining inspiration, and reaching out to the writers themselves for any meaninful conversations on how to learn to write, i stole them, rewrote them and claimed them as my own.

and as i did, i slowly started to believe in everything i was saying or doing. i did it so much i felt like i was performing an act whenever i did and convinced myself that it was right. in real life, i am just a person who wanted attention so bad, to be liked so bad, to be part of something that i did one of the worst things just to gain it. i guess in a way, identity theft, and then plagiarism.

which i know is absolutely wrong of me. i have also reached out to the creators separately and said my apologies, except for nine3rds who i have been unable to message. i can’t make them accept any apologies and i take 100% accountability, and it doesn’t lessen any guilt i have now that the truth is out or all the wrongs i did, but i thought that was the first step.

the second step is owning up to it and cutting through all the bullshit lies i’ve told myself. this year, one of my goals was to achieve something good for myself. idk about you, but i truly do believe in karma. i will of course get it no doubt, because of all the bad i’ve put out, but i’m also hoping that by being honest and righting my wrongs that even if i’m at rock bottom right now, i can still start somehow. not relevant but something i just wanted to say.

i just wanted to apologise to everyone who i’ve talked to here personally or formed close friendships with. it’s hard to believe me, but just know that when we were talking about our lives that was all real and not fake. i am still just a person, a shitty one at that, but those irl experiences and thoughts i talked about were real. I’m genuinely so sorry for deceiving you in some way. i will never interact again, i will stay off of this site for good, and i will also never try to write and post anything again, so i hope u get some peace of mind out of that. i’ve tried to apologise as best as i could to the close friends i made on discord— i have also disabled that account to let them see, and will eventually be deleting it. thank you for talking to me and making me laugh and just listening to me, even if i didn’t deserve it.

if you’re angry at me and resent me, i completely understand and will not try to speak further. i’ve tried my best to explain it all above, but i won’t open my asks because i hope this post explains it all enough. you can say anything you’d like under this post if it helps.

i’ve deactivated my account but i know the fics stay there so please delete any reblogs and unlike any fic. i am genuinely sorry for deceiving everybody for selfish reasons (that absolutely do not excuse anything). i have a lot of work to put into myself to try and fix things, but i hope this is a start.

now for the most imporant part, i wanted to link the original writers’ work. they are all incredible, and if you liked what i stole then of course you will like them even better as the original. please give them the love they rightfully deserve but please also respect their rules on who interacts:

AO3 lovelanguages

AO3 softbeoms

AO3 nine3rds

that’s all i have to say. thank you, and please share.

#haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x you #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu x y/n #oikawa x reader #osamu x reader #atsumu x reader #kita x reader #iwaizumi x reader #jujustsu kaisen x reader #jjk x reader #gojo x reader #geto x reader #jjk headcanons

[celestie0]

please share your thoughts on vinland saga. what is your favorite character, scene...? what is something you learnt through it?

omgogmogmgmggogm ty for this ask anon also so sorry it took me a while to get around to but i appreciate it i loooove vinland saga sm n i’d love to talk more ab it 😭🫶🏼💕 n if you’ve seen the show too i’d love to know ur answers to those questions as well aaa :””)

my favorite character for suuurrree is thorfinn :”) he is my sweet summer child, the apple of my eye, the kindest of all, my son, my heart, my treasure, my love, i adore him sm there are times where i think of him n i just start tearing up out of nowhere. imma sound so fkn insane when i say this but i really truly believe he exists in my hearrrtttt 😭💕 like he has to, there’s no way these feeligns of adoration i have for him have not manifested on some physical realm i just love him sosososooso much sobs he is my favorite fictional character of all time n i wish i could smooch makoto yukimura very gingerly on the cheek for bringing such a beautifully well written character to life. his determination to become a better person, live true to his ideals, and create safe haven for others is srs so inspirational to me i love him sm

[panels colored by @/hawta_mahmood on insta]

i would literally commit war crimes for him LMFAO (even tho that’s the opposite of what he would want anyone to do for him haha)

as for what i’ve learned n my fave scene(s) i will add a keep reading bc spoilers and also it’s gonna be really fuckin long 💀

what have i learned from vinland saga? dear god, so much. i could talk about this show for hours, HOURS, and i have before!! it is just that dense in philosophy n had my head spinning from all the reflections

of course, there is the infamous line in the show ‘i have no enemies’, which i think can mean a lot of different things to different people, in thorfinn’s case it is the line that allows him to adopt a life of tranquility n pacifism. i think for me, this line taught me to assume the best in people, and once i started doing that i think i learned how peaceful n meaningful life can be. for example, if i interact with a rude person or am fighting with someone i care about, and i am affected emotionally by it, i might think of that lesson from the show and i feel free in knowing that i have no one who i desire to hurt or retaliate against or even harbor negative feelings towards in my head(the saying comes to mind to think or speak negatively about others is to poison yourself) as someone w a lot of fuckin anxiety it’s very liberating to think that way, and i think that’s the biggest lesson i’ve learned from the show (among many, many, many others. i think another big lesson is obviously the subject of forgiveness, both in others and in oneself, but this post will end up being too long if i go into depth of all the things i’ve thought ab while watching vinland saga)

as for my fave scenes, i’ll try to just pick three 😭😭😭

1. end of the prologue. the scene when askleadd dies was so beautifully done. the moment where in his final moments, he urges thorfinn to rethink his life and what he wants from it, and to follow in his father’s footsteps. askeladd was such a cruel, violent, and objectively horrible person n was the cause of thorfinn’s journey of hatred in the first place, and yet in his final moments somehow his words to thorfinn did not feel out of character. that was the moment where i realized wow, this author knows what tf he’s doing and is truly so talented. to have a character’s traits sneak up on you like that, built so subtly throughout the show, so that the payoff feels so real and fitting and not forced, driving the direction of the story in the way we had been hoping for the whole time. fuuuckckf. also, quick mention of the scene where thorifnn finally lets go of his dagger n all the scenes from season one flash by on the metal. fuck. i cry EVERY. TIME.

2. i mean it’s a given, but the scene when thorfinn finally understands his father’s words and admits to a circle of bloodlust vikings that they are not his enemies, and that he has no enemies. what a wonderful full circle moment for his character arc, i get chills just thinking about it

3. this one may be a bit more random lol, but the episode that will forever stick in my memory is gardar’s backstory episode. fuck i could writr a ten page essay about this one twenty minute episode ALONE, but i’ll just pick out the one scene that just kills me. the scene where gardar helplessly watches himself in the past, as he leaves arnheid & hjalti, and there’s nothing he can do to stop himself. fucking hell. if there’s any scene that i think could perfectly show what a feeling of regret is like, that would be the scene, and what fucks me up so much about that scene is how he cannot even manage WORDS. he is a grown man, reduced to intelligible sounds because his pain is so profound and his guilt runs so deep that it is like he becomes all but a helpless child. just kill me, seriously. i had never cried so hard in my LIFE watching anything than in that episode. i sobbed so hard i had hiccups n my sleeves were covered in snot. but the ending, when he got to see his son again in the afterlife n he was the age that he wouldve been if he was still alive :”) my god. yukimura nails anything that has to do with father son dynamics, im sure its because he has a few boys of his own, and his love for his children is so evident in his writing. but also, the fact that he was able to make me feel SO MUCH for a character we hardly knew anything of, and also to use a character that the audience is not very familiar with to tell a story that i think almost everyone on this planet could relate to in some capacity (things we want to change n wish we could go back to do so…) just what a genius genius creative decision like he is just such a wonderful writer i appreciate him so much 😭😭😭

god, all of s2 is honestly my favorite scene LMFAO. the whole entirety of it is a masterclass in story telling. imma just do a quick few more of my fave scene shoutouts tho 😭

thorfinn getting his ear sliced by fox, thorfinn calling einer his brother, thorfinn climbing his way out of valhalla, thorfinn telling arnheid about vinland before she passed away, snake revealing the truth behind ketil’s name, thorfinn reuniting with his mother again. god just all of it. i swear, just all of it.

GAT DAYUM THIS IS LONG but idgaf i’d talk about this show until i draw my last breath lmfaooo thank u anon for this ask im clearly insane 🤣🤣🤣 ur probs like im never sending this bitch an ask ever again LMFAO just joking but srs i appreciate it i had a lot of fun answering :””) i just love this show so much

#i am clearly unwell over this show #the fact i wrote this much n could write literally HEAPS more #this show is a masterpiece #i will never shut up about that #vinland saga #thorfinn #einar #askeladd #anime #manga #anime review #anime recommendation #manga recommendation #manga review #asks #anon

[majorbaby]

u know, u dont have to answer this but u keep mentioning a sidney post you made that you're not satisfied with bc u wrote it much earlier in ur mash analysis, and i have to wonder what you'd say about him now, as a character, as a narrative device, etc?

Sidney is so much a tool for storytelling that I would liken him to punctuation. He exists to draw out the inner thoughts, fears and desires of our more three-dimensional characters, most notably Hawkeye but also Margaret, Klinger, Charles and the patients he treats on the show. Their psychoses are so often based in their fears, their denial, their disbelief, their unwillingness to take personal responsibility for their circumstances – which is not usually how real mental illnesses work, but still makes for good television. 

I’ve also used to term “Sidney ex machina” to describe his function:

Deus ex machina; plural: dei ex machina; English "god from the machine" is a plot device whereby a seemingly unsolvable problem in a story is suddenly or abruptly resolved by an unexpected and unlikely occurrence.

The 4077th will hit a wall with a patient (sometimes the patient is Hawkeye) that they cannot overcome, because they’re experiencing an illness of the mind and they don’t specialize in that type of illness - although you could make an argument for Hawkeye “therapizing” his friends (Margaret in Images, Radar in Hepatitis, BJ in Period of Adjustment) but he’s still not trained. When this happens, someone will go “get Sidney on the line” and every time without fail, Sidney successfully fixes the problem. This wouldn’t land so well if he was a recurring character on the show. 

Hawkeye is so in touch with the inner workings of his own mind and heart I wouldn’t necessarily put it past him to be able to monologue his way through his problems, coming to the solutions on his own (maybe with the exception of GFA or Bless you Hawkeye) but you still get the sense that he already knows the answer, he just needs someone to help draw it out of him. That’s Sidney’s role. He’s really just there for Hawkeye’s voice to have something to bounce off of so it becomes audible to himself and us, the audience. 

There’s one brief exception to Sidney being used this way and lol, it’s no surprise to me its in the Written-by-Alan-Alda Dear Sigmund. Alda’s episodes do tend to deal more with character drama, and I imagine he couldn’t resist taking a stab at Sidney. We learn that Sidney’s struggling with the loss of a patient – but only after Hawkeye and BJ read his private letters, really his journal, which is rude as fuck btw, but to me unintentionally emphasizes how much of a barrier there is between the audience and Sidney’s thoughts/feelings/fears/desires. But I can’t think of any other occasion where we get to see what’s beneath his calm, cool, professional exterior. 

There’s other times I was curious about that.. In War of Nerves he’s supposed to be at the 4077th as a patient, but he leaves the mess tent because he has a head injury that no one is considerate of, and he ends up treating people when he’s the one who’s supposed to be recovering. 

If you choose to see Hawkeye as getting progressively worse as the war wears on him (and idk if I do personally because the show is so episodic but that’s another post) then I have to wonder what it feels like for Sidney to have to keep treating him, especially in Goodbye Farewell Amen, where we finally see a crack in Sidney’s normally neutral expression, his consummate professionalism, as Hawkeye comes clean about what really happened on the bus. Like… they’re friends, it’s already ethically questionable to have Sidney treat him, and then we see exactly why that shouldn’t happen when Hawkeye is understandably upset that Sidney has decided to send him back to the 4077th. There is a moment of forgiveness and gratitude that passes between them in Sidney’s final scene in the series when Hawkeye thanks him, not insignificantly while he (Hawkeye) is performing surgery (to me it feels like a nice callback to OR), which he’d previously wondered aloud to Sidney whether or not he’d ever be able to return to. 

And here I am again saying that “flat” characters, of which Sidney is MASH’s best example, aren’t poorly written when they’re fulfilling their intended purpose, which Sidney does very well almost every time we see him. He’s so good at his job that it even feels weird for me to talk about his thoughts and feelings in fic, I want to get him in there, have him draw out the interiority of whichever character he’s in conversation with and then be like “glad we had this chat, peace” and actually that is how I see him being used pretty regularly in fic. 

Btw this is the Sidney post that gets on my nerves, not because I disagree now with what I said… actually that post is just this post stated too simply for my liking and it got way more traction than I ever imagined it would, so obviously it appeals to something that people feel, but I didn’t state what it was. It’s so vague it reads like a fandom in-joke. So thank you for giving me the push to show my work. 

#mash #re: mash #sidney meta #hawk meta #sidney freedman #long post #replies

[poptod]

i don’t usually talk about my private life unless it interferes with my writing or maybe inspires it, but i wanted to share something with you all. i talk a lot—because i want you to understand—so i will put this under a read more

well, it’s been a tumultuous two or so years since moving with my parents to this beach town in CA. some very good, some incredibly bad. and… it’s coming to an end. it’s a very complicated story and i suppose i don’t really want to share all the details, but i think i will share the big parts

like most people i have a complicated relationship with my parents. they are very kind but they also have done some irreparable damage to my psyche, like a lot of parents do. and maybe irreparable is the wrong word because i do forgive them, but regardless i will be moving out of this home without their knowledge.

i tried to do it once and i got caught. who i thought was my best friend decided to tell my parents and i got yelled at and berated for weeks, and my dreams crushed. i was going to go to egypt. i was going to go with my partner, my soul partner, who lived in another country. don’t worry, i met her in real life first while i was traveling. but.. i was going to go to egypt! the land of my Deities! my beautiful Gods Nefertem and Nuit, Hapy, Heka, Khonsu, and Amun… all of Them. Their beautiful faces. carved in the stone of Kemet. my parents never would have let me go but i was ready, i was willing, i would give up anything i own to be there in egypt with my Gods and my love. and then my friend, who was living in my room since he didn’t want to live with his parents, told my secret and nearly had my passport taken away permanently. he left my house and i can’t talk to him anymore because i won’t. can’t stand his words or his voice. but i forgive him.. i just don’t want to communicate with him anymore. i wish him the best.

i travelled to my ancestral homeland of korea after the separation and heartbreak. i visited many Buddhist temples and learned and engrained myself more with the act of worship and the Buddhas teachings; i fell in love with worshipping. i fell in love with the temples. and i revisited the ideas i’d learned in the sixth grade—idea of giving things up. of releasing material want, which leads to the cessation of dukkha. the idea is beautiful. and i think it’s accurate. stopping our desires for material things of this world will stop our suffering; suffering emanates from our greed. fear emanates from greed. in the end what matters is our connections to people, and in this case, my connection to my Love and my Deities. in korea, i found the knowledge, independence, and courage that has allowed me to bring to realization what i want not from this world, but from my life.

and now i’m trying again. i’m telling no one of my plan. actually, two people know—one is my closest friend of eight years who lives five hours north of me. another is someone i vetted thoroughly to confirm his ideology and make sure he wouldn’t tell my parents. and actually, he supports me! he almost admires my decision, the courage to get what you want despite the odds. and he is helping me. he’s a blessing from Hathor, an aid of Khonsu to help me travel to the airport to see my Love and my holy land.

there is no greater excitement than this! i will be able to feel the Nile through my feet and hands and hair. and the light of Amun-Re and Khons will shine on my face. and my love will hold my hand. does it seem like a fantasy? well, the world is love, the world is hate… the world is what you make of it. i know people who have easy lives and are incredibly depressed. and there is my Love, who has had an incredibly hard life and will talk much about it, but she is incredibly happy. she is enlightened. i want to be like her—i want to be with her.

do i sound insane? probably. but i’ve learned being crazy is a good thing. especially for writers. i don’t know how many more stories i will write about our beloved Ahkmenrah. i still have the Breeding Kings to finish as well as the Night Grows Dim. then i have a story i want to write about Nabataeans, and i might write a long forgotten story i used to call Hiding in the Light. i hope i will get published some day but it’s not my greatest desire. my greatest desire is to see the world with unending clarity, to know things as they truly are; in other words, to be enlightened. to worship my Deities. this is my path towards that.

to put it in perspective, i have two paths. literally two. i can follow what my parents ask of me; go to college, get a job, work for a long while, and then i can travel when i happen to get free time once a year for one or two weeks at a time. i can settle down in america without my Love; she is already a refugee in israel and can’t move to america. so i would be alone. this path has its good parts. my parents will love me, so will my grandparents. i’ll be well-off with many physical belongings tying me to this realm (which is debatably good thing—bad thing in my eyes), and i will be a normal person. how delightful.

the other path is the one i am choosing. i am going to follow my dreams, which is a terrifying thing to hear a 19 year old say. but i didn’t even think i’d live this long. i’ve healed so much. and this will further my healing. i wonder if it is possible for you to understand… maybe not. it’s difficult to comprehend. but i want you to know. i want you to understand. and it’s not because i want you to know what’s going on (though i do of course), actually it’s selfish, because i want to be understood, very desperately i want to be understood because no one except my friend who is driving me to the airport understands me. and even he is a little on the edge with it despite fully supporting me. this feeling of desire to be understood fades slowly from my life, little by little. i come to realize—or perhaps question—is it worth it? most people are incredibly close minded. most people live their lives blind to happiness and the truth of the world. most people do not even care about themselves. and i do not want to end up like that. that is not the future i’ve worked so hard to heal myself for.

everything will go. and all will change.

someday i will die. someday my love will die. someday all my possessions will be dust. someday this land will erupt in lava or sink into the crevices of earthquakes, or maybe it will slowly fade into the ocean. someday this earth will be unrecognizable. someday, our home will not seem like our home at all, and the only indication that we ever existed will be stones in the shape of our skeletons, and maybe even those will not exist. and someday the earth will be gone. our sun will implode, and the black love of space will enshroud everything. at that point, i really don’t want to be walking around talking about how i went to college. i don’t even want to be talking about how i managed to run away from america and go to egypt.

i want to be learned. i want to see it all in its beauty as the earth dies in its many wondrous colors—i want to smile as the sun evaporates into particles of gold, i want to understand this cycle and it’s end. and the way to get here—to this sense of bliss and enlightenment—is to separate from what the modern world wants me to be.

listen to me very well, because no one ever really does this—you have to live.

please live. this word carries weight like love; which means that not many understand it’s depth. you know it’s definition. but the meaning of it is indescribable and beautiful like a supernova the size of a galaxy.

You have to love. You have to live. Please.

[headingalaxys-spicy]

yandere norway headcanons pls (maybe some nsfw teehee)

Forgive me but I can’t think of N$F W headcannons right now for him. His personality airs on the side of asexual and not really the type to be into situations. But what’s do I know it’s just the ramblings of a woman who’s lost her mind probably.

Anyways hope you like this post!

He’s one of the most difficult to read Yandere, similar to that of Sweden, Iceland, and Japan.

When he does have a darling that he takes an interest in he will not approach you at all.

In fact by the time you do meet him it’s at least a year before he will introduce himself to you. He takes his sweet time in trying to figure out your personality through parasocial interaction, information that his magical friends bring him, and through subtle gestures that you get the hint and follow his lead. He’s not a particularly dangerous Yandere, somewhat forceful but not to the degree where it trips red flags like England would, as a fellow magical yandere.

Dude will go through all of your socials and read the backlogs. He will be entertained by the more than a decade old post that you wrote and about how you hate HS. He will build a perfect picture in his head of how you actually are in reality and anticipates the changes that have occurred in your life that have led you to be the human that you are now. Perfect in his eyes, and feels that you waste too much time in (home country). Where the standards of living are pathetic compared to the happiness that his people have.

He will occasionally join a stream you have going, IG live, Tiktok live etc Just to hear your voice so that when he goes to sleep at night he has something that can ease his mind and add to his imagination. The sight and sound of you flood his mind like great tides flowing in from the Northern Sea. He can sleep soundly.

His magical friends from the other side will aid him by pilfering things that you 9 times out of 10 won’t realize are missing. Things like a lip-gloss, sticky-notes that you used for meetings over zoom, that water bottle you thought you left on the bus.

He watches you like a tv show of sorts from his magical room. It’s nice for him to be able to gaze at your beauty from afar without having to exert himself.

Eventually the numerous sea of strings will overwhelm his soul and he will eventually want to be much closer to you than to have just the vision of you. Which at least as far as Yandere’s go is not nearly as bad as what England might do.

Norway is going to want to meet you in a fantasy he created and keep you there. He was able to look into your past memories using his magic to learn more about you and what makes you comfortable, what are your deepest dreams, etc.

“What makes you happy?”

Late one night. You brought your tired eyelids to a close. You had just survived a long tumultuous day . You didn’t want to think about anything. You didn’t want to think about anyone. You just wanted to sleep. When your eyelids closed for the last time you were brought to a new reality, one of which were it felt as though it were real.

“Oh (insert greeting that is most common for your nationality but for more friendly terms) Y/N how are you? Ready to bake (favorite dessert) and watch the ocean cam? I heard that tonight is supposed to be particularly exciting because of the storms raging on tonight.”

“Oh yeah! I’ve been in a haze of sorts. Hahah.” Not fully aware of your body but you wanted to at least try to regain some control. Everything felt fine even though you felt a little lightheaded but nothing too intense to hinder your basic functionality. All will be fine in this sweet daydream since Norway is great at keeping his close family entertained.

#hetalia #hetalia fandom #hws #headingalaxys writes stuff #headingalaxys #yandere hetalia #hetalia fanfiction writers #hetalia imagines #yandere nordics #yandere aph #headingalaxys spicy #aph nordics #hetalia x reader #yandere hetalia x reader