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#I'll be making a version for main
becauseplot · 8 months
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Penciled Lines
(Cross-posted on ao3, if you prefer to read it there. Reblogs still appreciated!)
Missa wakes up, and he thinks he might be doomed. This doesn’t scare him nearly as much as it should.
Missa is awake early—by his own metric, anyway. His nocturnal nature causes “early” for him to mean “early night” and not “early morning.” Regardless, “early” means that Philza is not asleep yet, still going through his nightly rituals. “Early” means that Philza is sitting up in (his? their?) the bed, pillows propped up behind him, notebook in his lap, sketching away.
And when Missa wakes up to the soft scritch-scratch of a charcoal pencil on textured paper, his forehead just so happens to be brushing Philza’s hip.
Missa can hardly breathe.
Oh no.
He knows that if he gives any indication that he is awake, Philza will stop sketching, close his notebook, shift himself over until he is politely seated on his side of the bed, and greet Missa with a friendly smile. Philza has done it before, when Missa wakes up early. That’s how Missa knows he’ll do it again.
Thus, Missa can hardly breathe—his breaths have to be the slow in-out of sleep. He can’t so much as twitch, either. He has to keep quiet and play dead or else he’ll be found out. Seen. Caught living the lie.
“Husband,” Philza calls him. They’re not married. They share a bed. They’re hardly ever in it at the same time. They have a son and a daughter. Neither of them know Missa very well. Philza has had an extra set of armor and a skull on his backpack for months, waiting for Missa. Missa doesn’t even know Philza’s last name.
Philza is a good man and a good friend—and Missa doesn't deserve him. Still, he takes what he can get. Curls around it. Hoarding every innocent kindness Philza extends like a starving creature: the generosity of a backpack fully stocked with equipment; the trust Philza places in Missa to watch the kids when he’s asleep; and now, the courtesy of not moving his hip from Missa’s forehead to ensure his “sleeping” isn’t disturbed. Missa clutches all of these little offerings in his greedy claws and hugs them into his chest, even as the guilt eats away at him.
Because, regardless of the lack of mutual feeling, he loves Philza. He loves him so, so much, and that is why he is doomed. He can’t afford to lose what little he has. He can’t cross that line. 
So Missa lies beside Philza, forehead pressed against Philza’s hip, pretending to sleep so he can imagine that they’re not just lying in bed together, but lying in bed, together; and later, when Missa truly wakes, he will sit on his side of the bed and look at Philza’s face soft with sleep and think about how lucky he is that he still has a side-of-the-bed to begin with.
Missa doesn’t mean to drift off. When it starts to happen, he’s hopelessly torn between shaking himself awake and thus giving himself away, or remaining how he is, silently fending off the inevitable. In the end, Missa clings to that scritch-scratch sound of Philza’s pencil on the paper for as long as he can before the fog at last pulls him under. 
Eventually, he dreams. In fact, he dreams of the calloused fingers he dreams of every night, hands like his own, an artist of Death, cradling and shading the contours of his face—a softness dashing charcoal across his jaw, and over his cheekbones, and perhaps on his lips, too, if he’s lucky. Defining every edge of him.
~*~
A deep sigh. Phil stops sketching as Missa shifts in his sleep. He tilts his head up so that the tip of his nose is now just nearly brushing against Phil’s hip. The motion disturbs the wild splay of his dark hair, revealing more of his face: eyelashes, cheeks, warmth. Tender blush of something Stygian and otherworldly. New.
Phil’s lips tilt upwards. He turns to a fresh page, and he starts again.
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giggling-stars · 9 months
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I've got zero clue what things to tag this please help ksjfkjskjsf
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wyldblunt · 2 months
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i missed valentine's but i don't care
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bookrat · 8 months
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Procompsognathus cuddle pile
They're for sale for $500
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artbyhauk · 1 month
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one of my greatest fears as a game developer is putting all of this effort into making an interesting, sexy, power fantasy of a transmasc main character only for the game to never find its audience and it to be completely forgotten
success is relative but i want trans men to know him, play as him, and feel that i made him for us
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flowercrowngods · 6 months
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i don't know how to be merely acquaintances when we used to be friends. or i think we used to be. i don't know how to yearn for a simple hello when you've been heaping your affection on me months ago, and i don't know how to talk to you when you won't say anything. when suddenly it's all about me. you know i have nothing to say, you know my brain is void of everything but horribleness and i cannot tell you about my day because i don't even know about my day. i cannot tell you about my day when i know you won't listen, when i know you'll apply your philosophy to my world and don't believe me when i say that everything is terrible. i don't know how to be the person you seem to think i am, or the person you want in your life. i don't know if you want anyone else in your life now that you're in love and sappy, found another recipient for your affections, leaving me empty and wounded and yearning.
you said you missed me. said it many times, while i was gone. now i'm back, have been back, and i wonder how you missed me, why you missed me, when you won't talk to me. i think you mistook missing for worrying. i think you mistook caring for a feeling of obligation. i think you like missing me more than talking to me.
and i think i can't breathe with how much that hurts
#how do you miss me when you won't talk to me? how do you like me so much and then go to just. not?#how did i let you in when i try so hard not to let people do that because i know that once they get past the walls all i'll be left with#is the idea of them rotting and withering inside me. polluting the space i create to keep myself safe.#why does everyone leave? leave in silence too. leaving behind so many questions and so many words engraved in my brain#i am so tired of *grieving* when those i grieve are still alive and well and thriving and i'm reminded that it's versions of myself#that i'm grieving instead. how do you grieve yourself? how do you not fucking fall apart over it?#just. fucking talk to me. don't make it be true that all i'll ever be is nothingness and the memory of someone you liked once#but never never never liked enough#i'm so so cold already. i'm a shell. i want to be warm again but it always leaves me so hollow and hurting#i grieve the dio who was warm. i grieve them i miss them i am so so angry that he had to leave. to hide. with no way out#i'm happy for you. i'm happy you're happy. but you're no better than anyone else and it makes me want to run away again#but i have nowhere else to run and no one else to be. and it's so fucked that it doesn't matter who i am i'll never be enough#for someone to just. stay. to see me and to stay. to hear me and to sit and listen and just. just fucking stay.#maybe i'm not worth staying for. maybe there's nothing to know nothing to hear nothing to see nothing to listen to nothing to find#maybe all i'll ever get is one/two good months paid for with a lifetime of grief. and i'm at the point where i don't want the good months#anymore with you or anyone else who tears down these walls with affection that is so endlessly addictive and leaves me yearning.#on the off chance that it will keep the grief away too. but that's the thing about grief isn't it? it's here to stay. unlike you#god this is so fucked up and i'll delete this later but for now i just need to. let it out. poe said i should make a side blog for the grie#but poe's not there anymore. poe has stopped starting fires. so this goes on main until shame makes me take it down#blah#personal#not st
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softgrungeprophet · 19 days
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my kaine playlist is 2 and a half hours long...
okay well actually it's more like—
there's my primary Kaine playlist which is 2 and a half hours long and kind of doubles as a partial Janine playlist (still mostly Kaine but there's bound to be some overlap, all things considered):
and maybe it has some questionable song choices
There's my Spider-Man (well, really it's just Peter) playlist which is also 2 and a half hours long and has perhaps what some might call "too much" Blink-182 and pop punk on it:
There's a mixtape from Annabelle to Kaine which probably isn't done yet but is 40 minutes long:
There's a response from Kaine that he makes after leaving which is 44 minutes long and also probably technically not done yet:
There's also a playlist for the "worst year of peter's life" fic-in-progress which is 55 minutes long, probably complete, and which is sort of about Kaine but is also about Peter and in general about the entire situation that they've all been subjected to (including like, Flash's interactions with not-Peter (Ben)) and also a little bit about the past:
I don't have a playlist for Ben lol
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cannibalismyuri · 9 months
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coming out as a passive jopper hater bc the insane level of capitalist pandering they did with s3 (with ERICA who is like. one of the worst, stereotyped portrayals of a black girl ive ever seen, bless her heart) was truly crazy. combine that with the copaganda and the general attitude of hopper in s3 which was played off as 'awkward loser guy doesnt know what to do with Feelings more at 8' was a bit .... Eh :/ to me. because it is so obviously a fictional character and show but like. disliking hopper/jopper bc of the ideals st is perpetuating and the fact that they arent compatible at All in s3 (to me, atleast) is valid. some ppl might just think that jopper is unhealthy and/or 'overrated'. because they do sort of pay a disproportionate amount of attention to jopper, compared to the other canon romantic ships (afaik, bc of the screen time counter) and that can be Weird, esp with the... how should i say this? balancer/savior role hopper takes in the relationship (we constantly see him placating joyce, sometimes even being slightly patronizing, and also they place a lot of importance on him saving joyce from a lot of stuff, which is cool and sick if it wasnt for the fact that it directly correlates with him being a cop, yk). and the general power imbalance bc he's a Cop and abuses his position of power constantly, and that is exactly Why anything that joyce does is seen as a #insane girlboss category 5 woman moment because she simply has the short stick in the power race and when she does manage to make an impact DESPITE her economic/social/'general uselessness in say in Major decision-making when it comes to authorities' shortcomings it is seen as an amazing win. hopper on his own is extremely fleshed out as well, because we get to see his arc play out with his relationships with his daughter and ex-wife and el and re-learning how to be a parent and how to not let love allude him, and that is lovely! it's so great to see the adults in the show being focused on! but joyce is absolutely disregarded and underdeveloped as a character of her own right outside of her relationships with hopper or her kids. we see that she is determined and a force to be reckoned with and that she cares very deeply for the people she loves and would go to insane lengths for them but all that doesn't Mean anything, because we never see a backstory for her. we never figure out who she is without her family or hopper, or what her motives and aspirations and emotional shortcomings and stumbles and mistakes are. for a character to be fully fleshed out, they need to be an interesting, refreshing and palatable character On Their Own without their relationships with other characters, and we just don't see that with joyce. like u have Thee winona ryder on ur show, and u forsake developing her character in favor of developing hopper's character with /not the best taste/ and causing her to be a blank slate of a mother, lover, woman and friend, but not a PERSON. all she's been reduced to is a Mother and Hopper's Girlfriend, and honestly, that's the worst decision they could've made in relation to her and her relationship with hopper.
anyway, all this to say; these are my thoughts on the matter, but i'm definitely not hating on people who enjoy jopper passively and DEFINITELY not any by/ler (the most predominant fandom im part of in the parent fandom of st) who enjoys them as a ship with their own dynamic separate from canon. because the by/ler fandom is NOT a monolith and nobody is obligated to agree with me or change their opinion if it doesn't align with mine or be forced to look at my opinion and feel bad for shipping anything. im not going to act Holier Than Thou for expressing my opinion and u should definitely continue shipping jopper if it makes u happy! as long everybody recognizes the copaganda and capitalist mindset grind propaganda shit in st (which is Pretty Obvious) and respects that while shipping what they want, i have no problem with it. all that is to say; peace and fucking love. can we (the by/ler fandom) stop fighting abt jopper we all have our own opinions this is bc we are Not a hivemind or a monolith and not obligated to have the same opinions relating to all aspects of st just because we happen to ship one thing. i am a hater and a lover
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lilacspecs · 1 month
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ughscara · 5 months
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you know, my deadass be like "oh yeah i'm just going to be proofreading my wanderer kuni fic, post said fic then start writing chapter two for my kabuki series tomorrow" then suddenly have the urge of writing ( or making a series ) about reader and kuni who are involved in the classical music scene and, you guessed it, are rivals who must work together.
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krys-loves-otome · 18 days
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OC Brain Rot Introductions
After making the first post with Thea and Abby, I realized that I didn't have an intro post introducing the character or to formally address what these kind of posts are going to be about (aside what I put in Thea and Abby's first post)
OC Brain Rot (based on this post here originally) are posts where I ramble off about my OCs and what they're up to currently outside of my writings and arts. In essence, these are brain dump posts. Sometimes they might be a couple of sentences and half-formed ideas, others might go into meta involving my ocs and whichever game they are a part of. Sometimes it might also include simple screaming, you just never know.
Brain rots will also NOT be spoiler-free! I'll usually note at the top of each post if there are going to be spoilers. Content and trigger warnings will also be noted in the beginning and in the tags where applicable.
OC Brain Rot is also open to questions towards and about the OCs themselves. They might even answer your questions themselves!
I've decided that, instead of having a separate tumblr blog (since I have like four of them at this current moment in time), I'll just make little posts about the ocs on main since I'm not especially active here as I'd like to be outside of queued posts and I have answered some questions in my OC's voices on this blog before (like this one from Houki giving her opinion on IkeSen's Masamune) and would like to get back into doing something like that.
Brain rots are also mostly going to involve my otome/dating sim OCs, but everyone is also welcome to ask about my original ocs and, if you're really curious, about older ocs that I've made for other fandoms outside of the otome/dating sim ones.
Below the cut, I've also put short intros for each of my ocs as quick reference for future brain rot posts. Longer, more detailed profiles will be made at a later date, but these will serve as little reminders for where this oc is coming from when I make future oc brain rot posts.
For other posts involving my OCs, here's my writing masterlist for them
Thanks for stopping by lovelies and hope to hear from you again soon!
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Houki of Jiyel, "Houki"
Preferred Pronouns: She/Her
Game: Ikemen Sengoku
Suitor: Mitsunari Ishida
Age: Early 20s
Physical Description: Short stature and chubby, large, bright green eyes, long straight black hair (that looks blue in certain lights), light to medium skin, wears round glasses
Personality: Quiet, Introverted, Observant
Brief History: A transplant MC from a different game, Houki was a noble lady sent on a diplomatic mission to strengthen ties between her home nation and six other kingdoms, mainly through the means of political marriage and alliances. Her plans were interrupted when she arrived in Sengoku era Japan and is now trying to find a way back to her home world to complete her original goal.
Misc. Fact: She loves reading more than anything in the world. It is her favorite pastime and is more often than not found reading some tome at almost any point in the day.
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Ophelia of Revaire, "Ophelia"
Preferred Pronouns: She/Her
Game: Ikemen Sengoku
Suitor: Kennyo
Age: Late 20s
Physical Description: Pale skin and hair (chin length and straight, parted to her right, our left), medium height, thin and willowy, dark red eyes, chin mole towards the right side (our left) of her face
Personality: Calculating, calm, refined
Brief History: Another transplant MC from a different game (same game as Houki), she was on the same diplomatic mission as Houki, but for different reasons. Born into a poor noble family, Ophelia has spent most of her life trying to bring up her family's position, was even briefly married for the cause, but thanks to her previous husband's passing, she's needing to social climb again to keep her family afloat, thus joining in her country's call for this diplomatic mission, hoping to marry rich. Being transported to Sengoku era Japan was not on her agenda and she's definitely not happy about this new life turn.
Misc. Fact: She has eight younger siblings, six sisters and two brothers.
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Dorothea "Thea" Reid
Preferred Pronouns: She/Her
Game: Ikemen Vampire
Suitor: Theodorus van Gogh, Arthur Conan Doyle
Age: Early 20s
Physical Description: Fair skin with lots of freckles, esp on her face and shoulders, long reddish-brown hair that she keeps in a braid most of the time, large blue eyes, medium-tall-ish height (just shy of Theo's eye level)
Personality: Friendly, outgoing, stubborn
Brief History: A lover of history and fashion, Thea had combined her love of both and had just finished her degree to be a fashion historian, and thought to reward herself after finishing college by taking a trip to Paris! Who knew a trip to the Louvre would start her biggest adventure yet?
Misc. Fact: Always wearing something either historical or historically inspired, like long skirts and embroidered blouses.
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Abigail "Abby" Clarke
Preferred Pronouns: She/Her
Game: Ikemen Vampire
Suitor: Vincent van Gogh
Age: Early 20s
Physical Description: Short-medium height, blonde bob/short hair that she grows longer to shoulder length as she ages, warm brown eyes, fair skin
Personality: Quiet, meek, curious
Brief History: Escaping from a bad situation, Abby finds herself in Paris, admiring the art and history that the city has to offer. Running into a mysterious gentleman that helps her escape some hooligans, she accidentally follows him through his magical time door and ends up in the 19th century! What's a girl to do now?
Misc. Fact: Her favorite hobbies are drawing and photography, though she wasn't really able to explore them as she liked in her previous life. She thrives under the tutelage of history's greats in Comte's mansion.
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Madeline "Maddie" Fleming
Preferred Pronouns: She/Her
Game: Ikemen Revolution
Suitor: Harr Silver
Age: 30
Physical Description: Short and curvy, greenish grey short hair that's wavy, wine red eyes, light medium skin, ears pierced (once in each lobe, and two at the top of each ear, making a total of six piercings)
Personality: Outgoing, caring, fun
Brief History: Visiting her grandparents in London, Maddie had found herself in James Park, meeting with a nice, if absent-minded gentleman. She had tried to return his lost pocket watch to him, but she accidentally follows him back to Cradle, starting her journey to unlocking powers she previously didn't know she had and to bringing peace between the two warring armies fighting over the magical wonderland she had found herself in.
Misc. Fact: Her power manifests itself mostly in non-living items. When she was younger, she made fake flowers to give to people she knew, singing to them as she worked. Her flowers would then take on characteristics she was singing about (a la Sophie from Howl's Moving Castle book version). Her flowers could make you have more luck on a test or even give you the confidence to confess to your crush! But be careful if you piss her off as her negative vibes can transfer to her targeted item and turn it cursed!
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Clara Laurent
Preferred Pronouns: She/Her
Game: Ikemen Prince
Suitor: Nokto Klein
Age: 27
Physical Description: Medium skin tone, wavy dark brown hair usually kept in a low bun, short to medium height, pink eyes
Personality: Serious, stubborn, kind
Brief History: A ward of Mr. Akatsuki, she was taken in by bookstore owner at a young age, growing up around books and a love of learning. During a festival, she met with a few of Rhodolite's princes, their interactions watched by Sariel, the prime minister, looking for candidates to be the next Belle, a person with a pure heart that chooses the next king of their country. She is chosen for this role, using her best judgement to make the right choice for her tiny kingdom, especially with the loom threat of war on their heels.
Misc. Fact: Her favorite book series is the Midnight Cinderella saga, telling the varying adventures of a commoner chosen to rule over the fictious kingdom of Wysteria. Her favorite in the series is Byron.
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Miriam "Miri"
Preferred Pronouns: She/Her, They/Them
Game: Obey Me!
Suitor: Lucifer
Age: Early 20s in season 1, close to late-20s by season 4/nightbringer's timeline
Physical Description: Medium-dark skin tone, pink curly hair that gets to its longest by season 4 (which is mid back), purple to pink gradient eyes, short stature, her pact marks glow when she's actively using her pact bonds. Pact mark locations include: Chest over her heart (Lucifer), behind her right ear (Mammon), Left knee (Leviathan), Right forearm (Satan), Lower back (Asmo), Stomach above the navel (Beel), Neck right on her windpipe (Belphie). Post Season 2, she has Lucifer's Ring of Light on her left hand ring finger. Season 3 and beyond, she has her Sorcerer's Society Tattoo on the back of her right hand, along with a ring on her middle finger that signifies she's a sorcerer and a member of the Sorcerer's Society, given to her by Solomon.
Personality: Curious, kind, stubborn
Brief History: Arriving in Devildom as a little pink sheep, Miri works to find a way to turn herself back into a human, which leads her to being made an exchange student at RAD, a school-like organization run by the devildom prince Diavolo, who hopes to bring the three realms together into peaceful relations. While staying in devildom, she is taken in by a group of powerful demon brothers, former angels from the Celestial Realm fallen from grace. In order to turn herself back into a human, she needs their power and she makes pacts with each to gain their help and support. As her bonds grow stronger with the brothers, so too does her own power, coming to a realization that she is a sorcerer in later seasons, learning to control her powers and to use her powers for good and to help Diavolo's cause to bring the three realms to peace.
Misc. Fact: She loves sweets and hates spicy things. She has a healthy fear of Mammon's extra spicy ramen and refuses it every time it's offered to her. Even regular ramen makes her suspicious after having sampled Mammon's favorite once.
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definitelynotlazav · 4 months
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I have some fucking thoughts about Brandon Sanderson's Mistborn Era 2 (and by extension Mistborn Era one) and the ways in which they mirror Avatar: The Legend of Korra (and by extension Avatar: The Last Airbender) but it is too late for me to type them up so I will have to do so another time
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the urge to make a multi-muse LL rp blog even though i will probably not do much with it and have mostly sworn off tumblr rp
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toiletshit · 1 year
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I got so engrossed by making the background I lowkey forgot about the art that would go in front of it lol
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pierswife · 8 months
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Sometimes I sit and think "you know making an rp blog for an oc would be fun" and then I immediately backpedal because I am a certified Coward ™️ /j
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nullians · 1 year
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I guess some joke about assassins would be in place
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