#I'm bad at puns

[windy-trickster]

cervin, you have all your quads filled right? can you teach me how to be a player like you

"Orl a. I a ctu a lly don't mind your existence. So I'll ignore the f a ct you c a lled me a "pl a yer". A nd yes, a ll of my qu a dr a nts a re filled. There's no re a l "proper" w a y of doing so." "Shit h a ppens b a sic a lly, a nd sometimes s a id shit ends up with you h a ving a m a tesprite or moir a il or kismesis. It's a ll a bout th a t "sp a rk" or wh a tever they s a y. Sometimes you get lucky, sometimes you don't." "In short: Don't worry a bout filling a ll of your qu a dr a nts. Just focus on finding trolls who'll a ctu a lly be there for you." -> The Mun har har's at the "spark" joke since Cervin is a Light-Bound

#cervin response #owormy #i'm bad at puns

[smol-sirens-garden-tobemoved]

So I am not saying I need to be taken out back and shot but

btw me and my partner caught up on Bungou

#OOC #Bad Puns #Pls lov me #I'm bad at puns

[the-punforgiven]

Hey, I'm really sorry to have to ask y'all, but my family and I are being evicted from our home and we can't really afford to live anywhere else.

We've been saving up for a while and we've found a place we can almost afford, but we're still short about $4,400. So like, if you have anything you can do to help I'd greatly appreciate it, but like, I get that times are tough all around so I totally understand if you don't

Here's a link to my paypal, but like, please only donate if you've got the cash to spare, I don't want anyone to go hungry on my account

#I'm sorry to have to do this y'all ;-; #Idk what else to even do though #like this shabby little trailer we're looking at is like the second cheapest place in the entire town #we're getting kicked out of the first #the rent was dirt cheap due to the asbestos and ghosts and even then we could barely afford it lol #I wish I could offer emergency commissions or something but I've been so paralyzed by the stress of this whole situation #it's hard to do shit like draw and I'm afraid if I do the emergency commissions thing the stress'll just crush me #as if it hasn't been already lol #and I feel bad because there's like #so much more important shit in the world going on rn #and more important voices that need to be heard than mine #but also like #we need a place to live #y'know? #sorry for this again ;-; #pun's text posts #help

[letsmcfreackingloseit]

And for the holidays I give you memes! Memes everywhere!

I hope that all of you are having a wonderful time, but if not, I at least hope these silly doodles brought you a little joy!

I'm going to keep this short and sweet today, so to round this of: These doodles are based off of the fanfic Apex Polarity, which is written by the lovely @naffeclipse and Eclipse' design is based off of @themeeplord 's fantastic design!

And as a bonus, you will find an alteration and a bunch of Yeti slogans/puns under the cut:

and if you're wondering why I made so many gd yeti puns, it was for michael's mug. You gotta have some fitting and funny slogan for all mugs. Btw If any of you know some good yeti slogans and/or puns, please call me, I've been struggling.

Michael; local cryptid believer, but not cryptid enjoyer

Vanessa; POLAR BEARS

Eclipse; I'm having the best time of my life! :D

Y/n; I'm having A TIME :')

#apex polarity #polar!y/n #polar!vanessa #polar!michael #polar!eclipse #orca!eclipse #dca #dca au #OK! Here comes the obligatory extra thoughts section- from top to bottom order- GO!!! #BEHOLD!: is the will smith meme- but it's also kind of a reference to the “BEHOLD- a man!” joke but- you know- in reverse :P #also if you wondering why Y/n is kind of T-posing- it's the 'I have too many layers of clothes so I'm sort of T-posing' pose #I love drawing them like that XD #and also I'm giving them a little sass- you know- as a treat 💅❇️ #NDA: I love michael. He's been through shit and is trying so hard to keep everyone safe- #and for that I want to give him a break and a hug :') #POLAR BEARS: I know and you know and SHE knows *nods knowingly* polar bears XD #Me and the bad bitch: this fits so well with polar!y/n but it would be an even better fit for hare!y/n XD #my pronouns: Sorry Y/n- eclipse will like you no matter the gender- so you're stuck! Good luck! XD #Yeti puns: OK so Michael knows sirens exists right? #So I was thinking that he's probably a cryptid believer- but not so much a cryptid enjoyer #So I was trying to make a mug slogan that was kind of both #but that was HARD- so in the end I picked just a pure and very simple yeti pun for his mug #the 'Yeti? Not on my watch!' ties back to michael believeing in cryptids- but not liking them #so yes- my headcanon is he will send cryptids to Uno hell if possible #at 'yeti spagetti!' I was grasping at straws- NOTHING RHYMES WITH YETI EXCEPT SPAGETTI!! Also yes- #spagetti is misspelled and I'm going to keep misspelling it because why tf is there an H in the word spagetti? NAY I SAY!! *GASP* ok done! #again I hope all of you are doing well in these times #and I'm sorry for being so late in saying this naff (got caught up in the holiday prep)- but I hope you're feeling better now! Ik how #stressful it can be around the holidays- but I hope this cheered you up and that you'll get to relax after chirstmas! #NOW I NEED TO STOP BECAUSE I'VE REACHED THE TAG LIMIT- happy holidays everyone and hope you have a good one!

[pharawee]

I want to be with you like this for as long as I can, Master Yoh.

#1000 years old #1000 years old the series #opal kritsapatorn #shane nutchapol #pun x yoh #1000yearsoldedit #thai bl #thai drama #bl drama #bl series #my edits. #istg if this has a bad ending i'll cry for the rest of the year #i'm still traumatised from kissable lips

[storm--bound]

inspired by my last reblog

How much shit did Vincent give Sam for falling so hard and fast for Darlin? How did the phone calls go when Sam kept asking Vincent to babysit the new bloods? How many dog jokes were made everytime Vincent smelt the shifter on Sam after having to patch them up again?

#redacted audio #Redacted asmr #redacted sam #redacted darlin #redacted vincent #stormy speaks #I'm too tired to type put diolague rn so have this #I love me some good dog jokes when it comes to shifters #And Vincent is full of bad jokes and puns #He'd same some shit like “did you give the wolf your bone already” or some shit like that #You can clearly see who my favorite redacted character is

[thephantom]

@theriddletrades' master.

#*mine #sweeney todd #josh groban #annaleigh ashford #mrs lovett #broadway #a little priest #they are soooooooo sillygoofy they killed like 100 people #i want to be their third so bad i look like an IDIOT #please note his fucking old man 'OOF!' at the beginning #that poor man almost went down to the floor #watch this blog turn solely into a sweeney blog. i may have a fucking issue #her fucking EVIL ASS LOOK WHEN SHE COMES UP WITH THE PUN IN HER HEAD #YOU CAN /SEE/ IT #NELLIEEEEEEEEEE I LOVE YOUUUUU #SHE'S SO GOOFY #i'm gonna touch the buttttttt

[notachair]

Since atla is again having an extra surge of popularity, I'm shooting my shot:

[ID: (Rest of image description in alt). At the bottom of the image sits the text: "Zuko: Okay. Well, I can't remember how it starts, but the punchline is "leaf me alone, I'm bushed."" ID end].

Did we ever find out what the setup for this joke was? I feel kinda haunted by it. If not- anyone wanna make their best or worst guesses?

edit: I now know what "I'm bushed" mean, but go ahead anyway 👍

haunted thoughts in tags ↓

#atla #the way I was early out for this next surge in popularity 🤗 I was in a different phase by 2020 #it's not like it haunts me day and night but it does bother me thinking back on it. please tell me I'm not the only one 🧍‍♂️ #I'll have to reblog the 'closure is a myth' post jk #what kind... of joke is it? leaf pun on leave i get. I'm bushed however I dont get. it implies the punchline sayer is a bush at least I #think. but what prompts the 'i am bushed' I dont get. is it not contextual? is it a phrase ive not connected like 'leaf me alone'? #is there anotger layer between leaf and bush? again what kind of joke (social:joke purpose. what is funny? only pun?) + (in-joke set up)? #is it about the kind of bush it is? is it between two plants? the plant & someone picking on the plant like a teamaker collecting? #is it about a plant that has grown into bush and thus (somethingsomething)?? is it not a plant at all? other elements? iroh *what*. #if the creators actually had a setup in mind- I fear it will be lame. but yet I am haunted #it must have cracked someone up for him to try relay it. (set in term of endearment here) 🧍‍♂️👈 *poking him* #either way. me 🤝 zuko @ being bad at remembering & relaying jokes 😁👍 #at least in that instance anyway #I mainly stick to irony & sarcasm. running along with an mistaken assumption or replying w something silly & blowing it out of proportions. #puns if I'm lucky. ect. fun when I can reference it later tho I try not to overdo it. not like I'll likely remember it for too long anyway #now to lay in wajt see if anything happens.... #avatar the last airbender #zuko #atla zuko #a:tla #my rambles #its lie and not lay is it not.....

[ninja-knox-ur-sox-off]

Y’ALL THE MARKETING TEAM DID PIXAR’S ELEMENTAL SO DIRTY

#knox rambles #Elemental #ITS SO GOOD??????? #ITS GOT SOME FIRE (pun intended) LINES #AND THE TRAILER IS LITERALLY NOTHING LIKE THE MOVIE Y'ALL DONT' UNDERSTAND #I'M FLIPPING TABLES #I SWEAR DISNEY IS JUST TRYING TO OFF PIXAR RN WITH HOW BAD THEIR MARKETING HAS BEEN LATELY #actually i notice marketing in general has just dropped in quality lately but what'eve's #my bro wanted to take me to see it so badly and i couldn't understand why until i watched it like #trust me dudes it's GORGEOUS #AND its got amazing story #like #UGH I'M FISTFIGHTING THE TRAILER #IT LEADS YOU TO BELIEVE THE MOVIE IS ABOUT SOMETHING TOTALLY DIFFERENT #LIKE ITS SO BAD #THE MOVIE ITSELF IS TOP TIER QUALITY #I would say i'm overhyping but then i remember some of the lines and the way the characters and relationship are written and just #no i'm really not overhyping it's actually really good #there's so much mroe going on in that movie than just romance my dude

[leopardom]

#someone would call him a pJanist #this pun was bad i'm so sorry but it's stuck in my head #joker out #jan peteh #leopardom gifs

[theelast-straw]

incredibly meaningful discussions were being had in the discord and this is where it led us. idk what this is either but I fully blame @lukaherehelp and @sparklyeyedhimbo

+ Bonus:

Phaya's not gonna stop (escaping the hospital to get that d-) you can bet on it

#did i spend entirely too much time on a bad joke again? you can bet on it (pun intended) #you can accuse me of anything but don't you dare ever say i'm not committed to the bit #the sign #the sign the series #thesignedit #mygifs #rae tries to gif shit #tw flashing

[unknown-lifeform]

Given how the Firsts are seen by the public in Crisis Core I think in the ff7 universe there should be like a lot of drag performers that take direct inspiration from the Firsts. Armies of drag kings dressed in some version of Angeal's uniform with endless honor/duty puns in their names. Drag queens in red leather outfits doing dance acts to the tunes of Loveless: the Musical (remix). There is at least one person who uses the stage name Sephicock and that's just how it is

#ff7 #ffvii #crisis core #angeal hewley #genesis rhapsodos #sephiroth #i'm bad at coming up with puns plz suggest more stage names

[moss-wizard]

Wattle'ya doin?

#that's a big stretch of a bad pun but I'm keepin' it #self

[twyxted-mind]

The internet, collectively: Man I wish someone would burn the goat down The deity granting wishes that has both a hearing disability and a beautiful chaotic spirit: By your command, I will bird down the goat

#Twyx's Bad Pun Theatre #I'm surprised nobody's made this joke yet

[trek-tracks]

Is this anything

#not trek #pusheen #florence and the machine #florence and the pusheen #puns #bad puns with no purpose #follow-up to my post #pusheen pusheen pusheen pusheen i'm begging of you please don't take my man #that's it that's it grading for a week and a half has driven me insane

[strangelittlestories]

Do you know one of the things I hate most about being an exorcist? Capitalism.

Hear me out - financial instability is one of the most common risk factors for a malevolent haunting.

Got disposable income? Good news - you move into a haunted house, and you hire an exorcist. Or, if you can’t find a good recommendation, you just move house *again*.

Come from old money? Even better - you probably live in a generational home and - barring any literal skeletons in the closet - you’re probably haunted by family members. Their unfinished business is probably some *literal* business and they’re just gonna give you financial advice. Sure, they might be pushy and lowkey toxic, but they’re invested in your success - you’re their legacy after all.

There’s a metaphysical reason why rental accommodation is riskier too. It’s way harder to make an evil spirit leave your home when you’re not the home-owner.

First off, having the right paperwork can really add some extra oomph to an exorcism. Secondly, most landlords really don’t invest in salting the foundations or decent silver glazing, so guess what? Your shitty apartment isn’t just damp and cold, it has bad spiritual insulation too.

And especially *smart* ghosts can take advantage of your housing insecurity. Want to get your ghost out of there? You might be able to use rental protection law as the basis for evicting your unwanted ectoplasmic squatter (especially if there’s a ‘no spiritual subletting’ clause in the lease). *But* that gets way harder if it turns out the ghost has been secretly paying your landlord rent! Even a bit of change it scrounged up from your sofa is enough - BOOM, it lives there now.

So the best advice I can give you as an exorcist if you’re one of the unlucky masses who’ve been borked by the housing market? Join a housing cooperative or a renters’ union or go live in a hippy commune. Anywhere you have that extra protection - ideally with a bit of paper that says you own the house.

And if you’ve got that bit of paper, and you start to have ghost trouble, your first step is to get a legal copy made on silver paper and with salted ink. It gives your magical protections a quick and easy refresh.

It’s true what they say: a good deed is its own re-ward.

#writing #microfiction #short story #flash fiction #puns #feghoot #capitalism is the bad guy #honestly the ghosts probably need rental protection too #we need government housing for ghosts is what I'm saying