#I'm here to help and be friends but not for any of Tumblr's trolls

[stupidlittlespirit]

Good Boy

Rating: NSFW (very!), mdni Type: Longform Tags: webcam show, voyeurism, sex work, masturbation, female body described, one use of gendered language ('ma'am'), virgin!Reigen, pathetic!Reigen, Word count: 5797 My other works: here on tumblr and here on Ao3! Reigen finds your webcam show and proceeds to be a pervert.

“Should I send my boss a video of what I'm busy doing?” You ask, rocking your ass back and forth. The skirt lifts when you bend down and Reigen catches a peek of your underwear when you lean over a little more. You turn until your back is to the camera and then begin to lift the skirt higher and higher as you dance, tantalisingly slow.

Reigen squeezes the base of his cock and smirks to himself. “I wouldn't bother.”

He finds the video by complete accident.

Reigen is scrolling aimlessly through the feed of his favourite porn sites, rows upon rows of explicit content at his fingertips as he trolls through videos he's seen so many times before he has them practically memorised. They don't do anything for him anymore.

He's bored of the repetitive scenarios and over the top acting, and if he has to watch another shitty, stilted skit again he's going to stop jerking off for the rest of his life in protest.

Well. Maybe he won't go that far, but he's certainly fed up with the lack of excitement.

It's closing in on one 1AM on a Friday night and Reigen is spending yet another weekend all on his own. Serizawa is busy with school friends, Dimple isn't in the mood to find a host body for a night out and Mob is likely fast asleep. If he's honest, even Reigen knows how pathetic he'd look if he asked a kid to spend his afterschool time with him.

The only other person he has to ask out is you. You're the newest member of the team and even though you've been out with all of them a fair few times, tonight you'd dismissed his suggestions with the simple excuse of being busy.

You hadn't specified what you were going to be busy with, but Reigen supposes it isn't really any of his business. He can't deny his disappointment, though.

He'd hoped you might jump at the chance for one on one time with him, and whilst he stares at the screen of his computer, desperate for something to make him feel less lonesome, the sting of your rejection is only softened slightly by the alcohol he's had for dinner.

At his feet, there are several cans of chuhai. Every time he drinks alone in his apartment, he finds that he only has two options when no one wants to be around him. One: get so wasted that he passes out before he can think too much about his misery or two: jerk off to prevent himself from thinking about his misery.

Right now, Reigen is reasonably drunk, he's totally lonely, and most of all, he's horny. He supposes he may as well achieve both outcomes at once tonight. He isn't looking for anything in particular right now, just something that might take the edge off and help him sleep a little better. His expectations of finding anything particularly exciting are very low.

However, perched at his PC, shirtless and in his sweatpants, Reigen is starting to think it might be a waste of time. Nothing seems of interest to him. It's either too weird or too boring, and he wonders if he might be better off just calling it a night.

In a last ditch attempt, he switches from his typical porn site to a newer one. One he hasn't tried before. Usually he'd watch something pre-recorded, but he faintly remembers reading something on a forum somewhere about the newest trend of cam girls.

The post had detailed how viewers could make requests for a performer to do whatever they wanted, all live and in real-time, and he has to admit it sounds a lot more interesting than viewing the same video over and over.

He clicks the first link that pops up from his search.

The website is simplistic and once he's clicked through his verifications, Reigen begins to scan the rows of people on offer. There are women and men and everything in between, but every time he selects one, the performer seems bored and uninspired. Sometimes, they're not even there.

Reigen tries the second page. He's halfway down it, not really paying full attention anymore, when abruptly one of the little preview windows looks vaguely familiar.

Squinting, he leans in to get a better view to try and place where he's seen that room before. The decor in the thumbnail looks like a place he's seen before, but he can't quite put his finger on where.

Reigen clicks it and at first, he doesn't quite believe what he's seeing. That decor, the colour of the walls, the furniture…. It's your apartment. He knows because he's been there; he's crashed on that very floor after several messy nights out, right beside the cushy bed that the camera is centered on.

He's absolutely, definitely, a hundred percent sure that that's your room.

For a second, he worries that someone might have snuck into your apartment and hidden a spy camera amongst your things without your knowledge. It's not unheard of for creeps to conceal webcams in places to catch footage of unsuspecting victims and although Reigen likes his fair share of voyeuristic content, he would never watch something that wasn't clearly a purposely set up scenario.

He reaches for his cell phone where it rests besides his keyboard, fully intending to call you and make you aware, when suddenly you're walking into frame and sitting on the bed, dressed only in your underwear, some sheer stockings and a ridiculously tiny little skirt.

You shoot the camera a coy smile and offer a little wave. “Welcome back, everyone.”

Reigen's jaw drops open.

You're on his fucking porn site.

You. Of all people.

Stunned, he watches you shift so that you can lie down on your bed, lounging leisurely on top of a thick, comfy looking blanket that covers your bedspread.

The lighting is low and moody, but there's a clearly a softer source of light emanating from somewhere behind the camera to ensure your half naked body can be seen properly.

Music is playing gently in the background, and beside the bed is a small table, on which rests a small selection of intimidating looking sex toys. There are a couple of interesting looking dildos, a chunky vibrator, and a few bottles of oil or something similar.

He watches you lean forward slightly to apparently read something on screen, your eyes scanning back and forth. Your tits press against the fabric of your bra as you shuffle up where you're resting, leaning forward to fiddle with what he assumes is your computer.

Reigen’s throat suddenly feels very dry.

Barely five hours ago, you'd been wishing him a nice weekend as you'd left the office, heading off for home to spend the weekend doing something that didn't include him. When you'd told him that you'd been too busy to go for a drink with them, he hadn't thought much of it.

Perhaps you'd been lying. Perhaps the real reason you'd said no had been to go and do this....

Briefly, he wonders if he's seeing things. Perhaps the room is simply similar to yours and you're not really you at all. Just another person who looks exceptionally similar.

He decides he needs to make sure that what he's stumbled across is the truth and not an unbelievably accurate illusion.

Reigen reaches for his phone again. Your face is just out of frame now and he can't be 100% sure that it's really you, but he's certain that he needs to find out. To test his theory, he types out a simple text, something casual to ensure that you'll have no idea that he's watching, and waits to see what happens.

[Reigen] - Hey, are you busy?

On screen there's a buzzing sound. You twist into a kneeling position to reach behind you and his blood runs cold. There's no way that it's a coincidence your phone is going off right now.

As he watches you shuffle back up to sit closer to the camera again, your pretty face comes into view and so does your cell phone, head aloft like a trophy. No doubt about it: this is no look alike.

You study your phone, reading the text and then glancing over to look at your audience. "Oh," You say, holding your phone up with a cheeky grin. “It's my boss.”

Underneath the video screen, there's a chatbox that's scrolling along, ticking upwards with each new message that pings through, and you look away from your phone to check it.

Several new chats pop up at your announcement and Reigen somehow manages to tear his eyes away from you to see what's being said.

What does he want? asks one viewer.

You laugh, soft and amused. “He wants to know if I'm busy.”

Your voice is softer than Reigen used to hearing it; teasing and intimate in a way that does something funny to his insides. A few more messages spin up in the chat:

is he cute?

Do you like him?

Would you fuck him?

Reigen swallows hard.

It's not like he hasn't thought about it. He's considered it several times, actually. In great, vivid detail. When he can't find any decent porn to get off too, he often finds thoughts of you wandering into his mind. Reigen knows it’s weird and unethical, but if no one else is aware then it's not like anyone can be hurt by it.

He's harboured a crush on you since the moment you'd walked into the office to drop off your CV and he hasn't known peace since. Every time you bend over to pick up files, he sneaks a peek at your ass. Whenever you brush up against him in passing, he prays he doesn't get hard. It's a nightmare.

When he's alone and he's given up on finding an ethical source of arousal for the evening, he’ll think about you in your office wear, or your underwear, or sometimes in nothing at all.

He's always had to imagine what you might look like naked and for some reason, he's never been able to get the vision to seem quite right. With nothing to reference, it's hard to know beyond the silhouette hidden by your clothes.

Until now, anyway.

You're leaning in close to look at the chat messages again, your tits pressed up against the thin fabric of your bra. They jiggle nicely as you move and Reigen feels his cock stir in his sweatpants. He reaches for the half-empty can of chuhai beside his PC and takes a swig to soothe his dry mouth.

“Oh yeah,” you say, biting down your lower lip. “Very cute. I'd fuck him anytime.”

Reigen almost chokes on his mouthful of fruity alcohol, spluttering awkwardly.

You begin to run your fingers up between the valley of your breasts, reaching over to toy with the lace cups of your bra and dipping your fingertips underneath the material to brush against your nipples.

“He's got such a great ass,” you whisper to the camera, biting down on your lip to stifle a smile. “I check him out all the time but he never catches me. What do you think he'd do if he did?”

Reigen's breath hitches. His face feels red hot at your confession and he knows that he's probably bright red, but can't believe what he's hearing.

The chat bumps up several rows, filled with suggestions and fantasies:

He'd punish you.

Probably promote you lol.

I bet he'd fuck you in the office.

“He would,” Reigen groans out loud to his empty room. “You have no idea how much he would.”

He's had plenty of daydreams about that exact scenario; bending you over his desk when everyone else has gone home for the day or letting you ride him while he sits in his office chair, slow and sweet until he fills you up. The thought drives him insane.

Almost of its own accord, his hand slips down to palm at his dick. There's a steadily growing wet patch on the front of his pants as pre cum begins to gather at the head and the slick friction of the fabric there only arouses him more.

“Ah,” you gasp happily as you pinch one of your nipples. “I wish.”

After a few seconds of touching your tits, you trace your hand up towards your collarbone and run your fingertips along them, back and forth slowly. It's teasing, erotic almost, and Reigen imagines your delicate fingers on his own skin, tickling along the soft flesh of his thighs or clutching at his back.

He's still reeling at your admitted attraction to him. He knows there's a chance that you're only playing things up for the camera, but he's so hard and so turned on by the notion that you might be into him that he doesn't care how true it is right now.

Rather than worry too much about the legitimacy, he hooks his thumb into the waistband of his sweats without looking away from the screen and shuffles in his seat so that he can expose his cock fully.

He knows he shouldn't really be watching this. He isn't even sure why you're on this website; he pays much more than he used to and there's no way you're short for cash, so you're not moonlighting to make ends meet. Maybe you just enjoy it?

The idea thrills him and so does the knowledge that what he's doing is forbidden. Again, he supposes that if you have no clue that he's watching you right now then he can excuse his actions…. Right?

“It's so unprofessional,” You're almost whispering now, talking softly as your touch travels to different parts of your body. “But I think about it all the time.”

Reigen reaches for the small bottle of lube that sits in the corner of his desk while you talk, squeezing some out onto the fingers of one hand. He trails it around his dick slowly, ignoring the chill and covering himself until the skin is slick and wet.

The chat pings again, except this time there's the sound of coins dropping. A pink message appears:

[400 coins] Ass shake/Dance

Briefly, Reigen is confused. He has no idea what that means and his hand pauses to check the message. Next to it is a little cartoon coin, and he realises that you've been tipped money to do an activity.

You smile brightly, however, clearly pleased by the strange sound, and slowly you get up from your seat. “Thank you so much!” You giggle, blowing a kiss to the camera.

He watches you stand and fiddle with something that looks like a TV remote, and then the quiet music in the background becomes a little louder. You begin to sway your hips in time with the beat of the music, turning on the spot slowly.

“Should I send my boss a video of what I'm busy doing?” You ask, rocking your ass back and forth.

The skirt lifts when you bend down and Reigen catches a peek of your underwear when you lean over a little more. You turn until your back is to the camera and then begin to lift the skirt higher and higher as you dance, tantalisingly slow.

Reigen squeezes the base of his cock and smirks to himself. “I wouldn't bother.”

Your skirt recedes to reveal the bare skin of your ass. You're wearing lacy underwear that barely covers your pussy and Reigen groans at the sight, watching closely as you wiggle your hips until the fat of your ass wobbles deliciously.

He barely gets ten seconds worth of a look before you're moving back to sit on your bed, and he can't help the disappointment that rises in him.

With his free hand, Reigen takes a chance and bravely types out a message in chat:

[anon] - keep going

“Ah ahh,” you chastise, clearly reading the command he's sent through. “Tip to make requests, boys, you know the rules.”

Reigen isn’t sure what he's more turned on by; the business sense or your bossy attitude.

One handed, he swiftly clicks through on the link that auto generates in chat to make an account. He spares a thanks that modern technology allows him to keep his credit card info saved online and as soon as everything has gone through, he comes right back to your room.

The chat spits out a menu, triggered by the forbidden request, that clearly states an extensive menu of services. There are lots of options, and Reigen's mouth begins to salivate as he scrolls down the list. Whilst he's busy reading, another tip comes in from a different user:

[800 coins] - topless

“Oh,” you say, grinning as you reach for your bra straps. “Stepping things up, huh?”

Your comment makes Reigen look up again and his stomach flips when he realises what's about to happen.

Teasing, you thumb down each strap, letting them fall down to your sides. You reach behind yourself to undo the clasp and very gradually, you lower the pretty lingerie until finally, the lace falls away to expose your chest to the camera.

Reigen stares at the screen, mouth open, and his hand begins to stroke his cock. He's imagined seeing your naked chest more times than he can recall but his mind's eye is nothing in comparison to the real (or rather, virtual) thing. They're gorgeous. Perfect, in fact. He's not sure that he's ever seen anything better.

Embarrassed as he is to admit, Reigen has never actually seen anyone naked in real life. He's never even fucked another person, but he's seen his fair share of porn and none of those videos compare to you.

Every fantasy he's ever had has been completely imaginary and he doesn't dare make a move to find sex in real life; being an adult virgin is horribly embarrassing and he doesn't want to risk being laughed at. For now, he'll stick to his usual viewing habits.

“Fuck.” Reigen mutters, breath hitching. His hand works the length of his cock, fist tight and slick with lube, and on screen you're reaching up to play with your nipples again.

Enraptured by your image, he tightens his grip on the bottom of his dick every time you pinch yourself gently.

You take both tits in hand and squeeze them together, biting your lower lip and grinning as chat messages pour through. It's evident that you're enjoying yourself and it makes Reigen feel slightly less guilty for being a pervert.

The languid strokes of his cock become even slower while he types out the message he'd intended to send before, heart pounding in anticipation:

[950 coins] - remove skirt/underwear

The jingle of the tip plays and your eyes light up. “Oh,” you say, leaning forward to check the request. “You're new here.”

Momentarily, Reigen's hand pauses. His username is just a randomly generated set of numbers. There's no way you'd be able to tell his true identity from, yet he briefly panics that you might have rumbled him. He holds his breath for a second.

You nibble your lower lip and smile, but his cover isn't blown. “You guys are excited today, hm?” You laugh, getting up again and shifting the camera to ensure everyone can see what you're doing.

Carefully, you make a show of lifting up your skirt and undoing the side clasp before letting it fall to the floor with a soft thump. The panties you're wearing are tiny, yet they cover you well enough that it's hard to see much just yet. You give your ass a little shake again and bend over, spreading your legs.

Relieved, Reigen's hand begins to move again and without looking away, he shirks his sweatpants completely. His body feels hot all over and being constrained by his clothing feels unbearably uncomfortable. He kicks the trousers away from him and grins at your excited laughter.

“How's the view?” You ask, squeezing your ass gently.

“Perfect,” Reigen grunts, as though you can hear him.

You're reaching between your legs now, stroking your covered pussy up and down, and Reigen moans quietly. Chat messages are stacking up below your video screen, but he only has eyes for you right now.

Deliberately unhurried, you drag your hand back through your legs and take hold of the waistband of your panties. You pull the fabric down, down, down, slipping it over your round ass until finally you're baring yourself to the world in the most intimate way.

Wetness clings to your underwear when you tug it away and you're visibly aroused by the movement, making a soft sound of pleasure.

Reigen almost cums immediately. He grits his teeth and exhales sharply, letting go of his cock and willing himself not to finish early. It would be a shame to spend himself so soon and he wants nothing more than to spend all night staring into you.

“Like that?” You ask your audience, voice a little muffled now that you're turned away.

Several messages affirm that they do, in fact, like what they're seeing.

Reigen breathes heavily through his nose and rolls his chair closer to the monitor again. He takes a second to calm himself down, though he doesn't stop watching you wiggle your backside, and once he feels capable, he types out another request:

[1000 coins] - touch yourself

This time, he follows it up with a ‘please’ and you turn slightly to see what's happening.

You smirk and move back toward the bed, choosing to sit down and spread your legs this time. The view is still perfectly clear and Reigen finds that he likes this much better; he can see your pretty face, your tits and your wet pussy all at once. Hand firm on his dick, he starts to jerk off again.

“Do you like what you see?” You giggle, hand wandering southwards.

“Fuck, yeah I do.” Reigen groans, swiping his thumb over the head. The motion sends a shiver through his body and he fumbles with his free hand and keyboard to type out an affirmative answer.

You smile, coy, and stop your fingers just above your clit. “And what do we say when we want something?”

Reigen swears under his breath. He likes this; being forced to ask nicely and hope that he's given what he wants. He doesn't know why he enjoys it, but the idea of having to plead for your attention and his own release does something undeniable to his body, and he loves every second.

The flush on his face travels down his neck and burns the tips of his ears, spurred on by his myriad of emotions.

With one sweaty hand he types out:

please

touch yourself, please

The smile that comes to your face when you notice his message is positively wicked and your hand drops lower, gathering wetness. “I think you can ask even more nicely than that, can't you?”

He doesn't care that he's paid for a simple act. What he's getting right now is more arousing than anything he could have ever dreamt of receiving. The way his cock twitches in his hand suggests his body agrees. “Please.” Reigen whispers to his empty room, voice breaking. “Fuck, please, touch your fucking pussy for me.”

Panting and moaning with every stroke of his fist, Reigen shakily taps out another desperate response.

plsaase

pls

im begging u

It's obviously the right response because you do exactly as he asks: your fingers begin to brush over your clit and you gasp at the contact. Gently, you rub yourself in tiny circles. Your skin glistens in the light and even with the music playing, he can hear your moans and sighs when your touches speed up.

Reigen jerks himself off in time with your movements. His apartment fills with the wet, oily noises of his lubed up palm on his dick and his heavy breathing, broken only by his pathetic begging for more. “Oh god,” he whines, leaning forward in his seat to grip the edge of his desk. “Fuck, fuck, fuck.”

He wants to ask for more, to see you get even more explicit, however he worries that if he lets go of his desk he might keel over. Fortunately for Reigen, another request pings in. This one goes even further.

The anonymous user tips a significant amount and much to Reigen's horny delight, asks you to use one of the larger sex toys on the table next to your bed.

A few minutes pass in which you continue to touch your clit and Reigen realises that you're getting caught up in this yourself. You're so lost in your own pleasure that you're too busy to see what your audience want.

It turns him on no end.

Eventually, you force yourself to pause and glance at the chat. There are a few annoyed messages about you ignoring them, but you pay them no mind, instead saying a breathless thank you to the new requester and reaching for a sizable, pink dildo. It's thick and decently long, and you hold it out for him to see properly.

“Should I use this one?” Your voice is fraying at the edges, strained from all your noise.

Oh yeah

Fuck yeah use it

Do it

You don't appear to need much encouragement and you sit back on your elbows, legs spreading even wider as you rub the head of the fake cock over your pussy.

Reigen imagines that instead of cool, false plastic, it's his dick that you're grinding your hips into. He pictures himself between your legs, gently slapping the swollen tip of his cock against the soft, wet folds of your cunt whilst you squirm and groan in pleasure. His moans are getting louder now, unrestrained and wrecked, and he knows he sounds like a girl but he can't find it in himself to give a fuck.

Again, he almost cums, but rather than let it happen he allows himself to get as close as he dares and then stops touching completely. He has plenty of time to draw this out; you haven't even put the dildo in yet.

You're still circling it around your hole slowly, grinning and chewing on your lip in anticipation of what's to, rather ironically, come.

Sweat trickles down Reigen's neck. He's over stimulated and unbearably turned on, body red hot and flushed. He reaches for his drink again and takes a quick gulp before picking right up where he left off.

“Wanna see me fuck myself?” You tease, peering at the message box.

Reigen is the only one who responds. He knows it's likely because every other person in here is too busy getting off to answer, yet he seizes the chance to catch your attention.

yes please

Your warm smile returns and he finds himself smiling too, enjoying the way your expression softens. “You're a sweetheart, aren't you?” You say fondly, sitting up a bit more.

Reigen grins and nods, even though he knows you can't see him. He dials up his politeness, practically gagging for your attention, and moves his hand down to stroke along the sides of his dick, teasing himself as he type:.

yes ma'am

Something changes in your gaze at his message, hot and intense, and you start to circle your clit again. “Ask me again.” You sigh happily. “Be a good boy.”

Reigen's brain almost short circuits at your comment. He moans again and tips his head back, hand working hard between his legs. “Oh, my god.” He chokes out, scrambling to answer via his keyboard. “Fuck, that's- say that again.”

please ma'am

pls fuck urself

ill do anything i swear

just call me that again

You're clearly entertained by his request. Even more so, you appear to be turned on by it. Slow and steady, you ease the dildo into yourself, keening loudly at the sensation yet still managing to fulfill Reigen's request.

“Good boy,” you breathe, smiling wide. “You're such a good boy for me.”

Reigen makes a humiliating noise. It's a mix of a moan and a sob, and he stops jerking his cock in favour of fucking his own hand instead. His hips buck forward wildly, uncontrollable and desperate, and he attempts to match the tempo in which you fuck yourself.

He watches in awe as you drive the dildo into your cunt, arousal dripping down the length of it and leaving it shiny and slick.

“Oh, fuck,” Reigen chokes out breathlessly, grinding into his fist like he's fucking you himself. “Don't stop, fuck, don't stop.”

His moans mix with yours on screen and if he could bear to close his eyes, he might imagine that this is what it feels like to be inside you. As it is, he can't bear to look anywhere but at you.

Your hand is moving quickly now, pumping the toy in and out while you rub your clit just as fast, crying out in pleasure.

Reigen's girly moans pick up in pitch and he begs you with everything he has: “Keep going, please, I-ha! You feel so good, so good, fuck!”

As though you can hear his pleas, you don't relent your movements. Your tits bounce with the force that you're fucking yourself with and you groan every time you hit a good spot.

It's obvious that you're no longer playing along with whatever your audience wants; You're lost in the sensation and Reigen is completely beside himself, right there with you.

His chair rocks and creaks underneath his moving weight and he scrunches up his bare toes against the wooden flooring to stay put, listening to you as you continue to encourage him.

“You're my good boy, aren't you?” You pant, eyes closed. “Touching yourself just like I asked….”

“Yeah,” Reigen whimpers. “I swear, just for you, whatever you want.”

“Fuck,” you sigh on screen, angling the toy. “Fuck.”

Reigen can barely breathe. He's sweating profusely, rivulets trickling down his brow and blurring his vision, and he can feel something tight and white hot coiling in his lower belly.

The pressure is building slowly, growing with every pass of his fist and every moan you make on his monitor, and his ability to speak unravels. He's babbling about anything and everything, eyes darting from your pussy to your face, and the feeling in his belly spikes.

“Oh, god, oh fuck,” he whines, long and low. “I'm gonna cum, I'm- please, let me cum!” His pathetic moans hitch and in their lull, he hears you speak a single word that sends him crashing over the edge:

“Reigen!”

You cry his name quietly, sweeter than a prayer, and shudder as you climax with him.

Unable to stop it, Reigen's orgasm hits him so hard he almost blacks out for a moment. He cums hard, spilling all over his fist and stomach, his toes curling and body convulsing with intense pleasure. He ducks his head and shouts something unintelligible, drool dripping down from his open mouth to mix with the mess on his hand.

The aftershock of his orgasm has him spasming in its wake, muscles twitching and cramping as he heaves for breath. Reigen releases his cock and slumps back in his chair, panting hard like he's run a marathon.

He's fairly confident that it might be the best orgasm he's ever had.

On screen, the music has stopped and there's only the sound of your laboured breathing filling the silence. You're panting hard, pussy spread by your toy, and you look wrecked. Your hair is a mess, your eyes are half-lidded, and underneath you the blanket is soaked.

Reigen wipes the sweat from his forehead with his clean hand and takes a few minutes to gather his bearings. He sees you remove the toy slowly and place it back on the bedside table before you sit back down, cross legged, on the bed. You avoid the wet patch, wrinkling your nose and flipping the blanket over to prevent yourself from sitting on it, and you pause to catch your breath. Your chest rises and falls rapidly for a minute, and he watches you catch your breath.

Clearly you're a seasoned professional however, because you go back to checking your chat messages only minutes later. Every user in the room is overjoyed with your performance and Reigen has to agree. He's never seen a porno anywhere near as sexy as what he just witnessed and he's not sure he ever will.

Reigen reaches over for the box of tissues next to his computer and carefully wipes up the mess on his hand. There's cum on the floor too and when he's confident that his jelly-like legs won't let him fall off the chair, he leans down to clean it up.

Once everything is less sticky, Reigen checks the chat. There are a good few messages pinging up and they make him smile, big and stupid, and more than a little smug:

Who is Reigen?

Fuck, he's a lucky guy

Wish I was him

Listening to you moan his name, watching your face whilst you'd fucked yourself silly, it's all imprinted on his brain forever.

He's still reeling over the fact that it was his name on your lips as you came. You've never shown interest in him like that, at least not to his knowledge, and if you've been getting yourself off to the thought of him anywhere near as much as he has to you, Reigen wonders if it might be worth catching a few more of these streams until he can find the courage to see if you might want to to go out sometime.

You're putting your lingerie back on when he looks back up to you again. There's a glow to you that only appears after a good fucking and Reigen's stomach summersaults. He knows that the small crush he has on you is going to snowball dramatically now.

He won't be able to look you in the eye again without thinking of the sounds you've made tonight. That being said, he’ll worry about how to deal with the awkwardness and the shame of spying on his subordinate once he's sober tomorrow morning. For now, he’ll enjoy the rest of his evening watching you.

You don't acknowledge the chat’s questions about who you're thinking of in your intimate throes, instead choosing to finish getting dressed and then grabbing your phone from where it sits at the end of your bed.

“Now I really should reply to my boss,” you tell the chat, leaning across the gap to click something with your mouse. “One second.”

The stream mutes and your fingers move back and forth over the phone keypad quickly. There's silence, and then Reigen's cell vibrates loudly. It scares the shit out of him and he snatches it up, staring at the screen.

Sorry. I was playing online. Maybe we can hang out tomorrow?

Reigen grins and fires back the smartest reply he can think of.

[Reigen] - Don't wear yourself out ;)

On his monitor, he sees you laugh silently, head tipped back and smiling wide, and his heart skips a beat.

Tomorrow it is.

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[tmntkiseki]

Originally, I wasn't going to go public about this...

But I realized something yesterday: Suffering in silence is stupid. While it is true that there are a lot of horrible people on the internet, there are also a lot of incredibly kind people--people who may be complete strangers to you, but are more than willing to reach out a helping hand if you let them know that something is wrong, and I'm tired of pretending that everything is fine around here when it's not. So here we are.

The short version is this: Ever since I disabled anonymous asks back on the 6th of this month, I've been repeatedly stalked and harassed by an individual I've taken to calling Troll-san. Why Troll-san? Because I'm an older internet user, I've been active online since the mid-2000s, and that's what they are: a troll, and they've gone through so many URLs at this point that I have nothing better to call them.

Troll-san primarily harasses me through my ask box, but they've occasionally attempted to do what they've been doing through reblogs on my posts as well. I will give them credit where it's due because they've been incredibly persistent; every time I block one of their URLs, they proceed to delete and then remake it in order to circumvent the block feature and continue sending me more hateful messages. This also has the side effect of making reporting their behavior incredibly difficult, and that's assuming that Tumblr staff decides to even try doing something about this. (And I do not trust Tumblr staff at all.)

This is one of the only asks I made an effort to take a screencap of, sent not too long after I made my post on Friday regarding my recent ER visit, and let it be said that this is FAR from the worst message they've sent me. (They have, in fact, sent a couple of asks telling me to kill myself.)

So, at this point in their little harassment campaign, I can confirm a few key details about Troll-san.

This is indeed over the fact I disabled anonymous asks. I'm not particularly special for disabling them since so many Tumblr users do it, but presumably the reason Troll-san is so wound up over it is that if they're having a bad day and feel like being a dick someone (me), they can no longer send rude asks and avoid the consequences for it by using the anon feature. (In fact, that's the entire reason why so many Tumblr users disabled anons in the first place! Because people were abusing them to be assholes!)

I am definitely not their first victim. I did some digging around yesterday and can confirm that there is at least one other user who has also been harassed by Troll-san, and there are likely more people who may have/are dealing with the same person.

Even though Troll-san has been constantly deleting and remaking their URLs in order to bypass the block feature and continue their harassment, I am about 99% positive that their primary URL is grandangelkitty. It's one of the only URLs that they haven't deleted and remade at some point, and the other user who was harassed confirmed it was one of the URLs that they had to block. Whether it'll still exist by the time anyone reads this, I don't know, but I figured it was worth mentioning.

I realize that by acknowledging what's going on, I am potentially inviting yet more harassment and allowing this situation to drag out even longer than it needs to, but A) cyberbulling is never okay, and knowing I'm not the first person to be harassed by this particular individual makes me more angry than knowing I have to put up with it at all and B) I've never been afraid of Troll-san. They lost all my respect when they ignored my first block and I had pretty much lost my ability to take them seriously by the time they remade their URL for the fourth time. I just wish they'd learn their damn lesson already that no means no and that being horrible to strangers online is going to result in them making enemies rather than any friends.

I did finally reach out to a couple people online regarding this ongoing fiasco and while I won't be naming anyone specific; thank you all so, so much for your kindness and support. I was originally quite content to try and deal with this problem on my own, but I find so much comfort and renewed energy in knowing that I'm no longer alone and that there are people who do have my back. I'm not at all weak for having to ask for help; in fact, I'm all the stronger for it.

I am hoping that by finally acknowledging what I've had to endure for the last week that not only will I be helping to protect more users from this person, but that they'll finally get the message that this kind of behavior is not tolerated in this community. For anyone who has read this far, please, stay safe and I hope you have a good day!

P.S.

#star's turtle talk

[elephant-in-the-pride-parade]

That Troll Accusing P/T fics and Trek Fic Writers Blogs (Including me) of Racism could be a Right-Wing Bot.

Edit (4/16): I would like to emphasize that i really hope this theory is not true. It stemmed from having had multiple friends and acquaintances in the voyager fandom (white and not) be suicide baited and otherwise harassed with vague accusations of racism over the past year, (for P/T primarily, but other ships and characters on occasion too) yah we did cycle through a lot of explanations. Ultimately our anon(s) being someone with either a malicious motive or an extremely ill thought out and unproductive approach, were the explanations that wound up making the most sense. the content of the anon asks and comments i am refering too has been both vague and painful, and further, never came from a real ao3 or tumblr account. these also came with no evidence based points for the fic writers to work on.

I do not believe this theory below to be anywhere near the most plausible. but it is the only conclusion we could make sense of for a slew of similar anon messages that, at the end of the day, did a lot of hurt without making any concrete points that writers could take action on. By making this analysis, my hope is not to convince you all that a right wing troll is out to get voyager fic writers. Instead, i hope it comforts writers who have gotten similar attacks and helps them to dismiss messages that come with harassment and suicide baiting, rather than evidence based points. And i hope if there are real people behind those anons that seeing this analysis helps them to reconsider the effect their approach is having.

Original Post from 3/2

At first I thought I was paranoid post-2016 and 2020, but now I've been hit a couple times and seen comments on more of the affected fics. And I'm seeing concerning themes.

I make a couple of assumptions here: 1. My anon (whom I will refer to throughout as "The Anon") is the same each time. 2. The Anon is the same actor or belongs to the same group as The Anon troll commenting on P/T and some J/C fics.

The Anon as a Bot Evidence:

1. The Anon accusations are sweeping, but generic. They do not use in-fic textual evidence to justify their comments. You write P/T: You're a Tom apologist. You think Belanna is his exotic wife. You justify your blatant anti-latina racism by casting her anger as an inherent a Klingon trait. You write J/C: You think Chakotay is a noble savage and fetishize him. You write Harry Kim: You're infantilizing him.

These tropes and stereotypes are legitimate concerns that fic writers should care about and should be mindful of. These accusations on the other hand are not legitimate. They are left as guest comments or anonymous asks on fics heedless of the fic content or writer's background or track record. The AO3 comments do not reference fic content. They are repeated across all impacted writers. They target new and veteran writers alike. They target fics regardless of rating.

2. Comments that appear to reference fic specifics go no farther fic tags.

This was harder to catch. But a P/T fic tipped me off last month. It was tagged "Tom & Belanna & Miral". The Anon's first comment on that fic dove in accusing the fic of incest. This showed both that the anon had not read the fic content - they also didn't understand the difference between a / tag and an & tag. (Which also means the programmer of the tag-reading bot or human actor creating tag-based comments is not literate in how fandom ship tags are structured - they may not be a fan at all!)

3. The Anon never replies. Not on AO3 or on Tumblr. (All AO3 comments from "The Anon" seem to stick to the automatically assigned Anon name or use a generic, short first name like "Sam").

Exceptions to this - the rare ocasions where someone sympathetic to the anon replies break from the distinctive patterns of The Anon. Replies come from either burner accounts or guests with more unique names. And these replies are both A - fewer and far between - suggesting they are a different actor - and B - by and large quite serious and thoughtful. I take them to be real people, legitimate fans concerned about racism, caught up in the crossfire.

4. The Anon uses language intended to engender right-wing sympathies and white-moderate anger.

The Anon sent this in their message to me the other day. I will bold the relevant passages.

"You’re the perfect example of the kind of white person who ruins fandom for everyone else, a nasty racist bitch who cares more about their shitty fanfiction than the feelings of actual people of color. Keep using your precious freedom of speech to fetishize brown men I guess

"The kind of white person": This anon has no proof of my race and proof doesn't matter to them. (They have targeted writers of color and white writers alike) They are indiscriminant because they are hoping some of their targets are white women. They are also attempting to out-group white women from the rest of fandom - trying to engender in me feelings of being alienated from my community.

"Nasty racist bitch" "Nasty woman" incidentally is what Trump famously called Hilary Clinton during a 2016 debate. Calling me a racist is there to put me on the defensive (and to alienate me from my coalition) Im meant to feel shocked and disheartened by this accusation. And in a way, keeping this generic serves a purpose. A lack of specificity makes it harder for me to defend myself. "Bitch" is there to trigger my fear/anger response. It is also assuming my gender - again. The anon doesnt care if they accidentally sent this hate to a man or nonbinary person or a person of color. they are betting that at least a plurality of targets will be their key white woman demographic.

"people of color" - while it is correct terminology - is also terminology of the US left/democratic wing. By using this term the Anon is in-grouping themselves with the left - trying again to make me feel like an outsider.

Finally, the kicker is the Freedom of Speech part of this ask.

The Anon is using the concept of free speech here in the same way that the MAGA crowd does, to mean that I ought to be able to say whatever I want regardless of how it hurts others, rather than the legal term's actual definition - the right to critique one's government without being jailed or killed.

By accusing me of caring about Freedom of Speech this way they're not trying to make me feel guilt - theyre trying to hurt me, make me angry, and guide me to sympathize with Republicans. They are using the term this way to push me to think of my fanfic in terms of free speech and thus to agree with Republican freedom of speech talking points. Or if I reject the accusation - to feel torn between Left and Right.

The Anon is trying to sow discord. Theyre employing the same tactics that broke the Womens March movement in 2021, and that pervaded so many Facebook groups and twitter in the last two US election cycles. They are using tactics honed to cleave apart progressives and moderates.

My only question after all those realizations was: why the fuck are they doing this to such a niche group as star trek fanfiction writers.

And then it hit me.

The Anon's Motive: Trek Fic Writers are a Target Election Demographic.

By and large, US fan writers of ships from 90s star trek are women, often millenial and gen x women, many likely to be suburban. And yes - more likely to be white. In short we are part of the same demographic Trump lost in 2020 and needs to either win back this year, or try keep from going to the polls.

You can tell me I sound ridiculous - I think this whole stinking situation is ridiculous. I'm not unaware of how fringe a theory this is. I've been taught to always assume incompetence before malice. And for a while I considered that maybe The Anon was genuine. Maybe they had good intentions and poor execution. I'm sure I could write characters of color better (I am not afraid to admit that I'm still learning. Being wrong isnt something to be afraid of). I wanted this to be the case actually, but I have too much evidence and motive in favor of malicious bot tactics to ignore.

I have tried so hard to think of a reason I'm wrong. Except that all the pieces make sense. No fic / writer specific grievances have been aired by The Anon. They hit the same points every time, again, without textual evidence. They never reply. They chose words that wound and inflame but that never say anything specific about the fic or writer.

And wouldn't it be damn convenient for the Trump camp if a bunch of progressive and moderate US star trek fans decided not to vote because they were disheartened by being accused of racism and felt alienated from the democratic coalition.

This is a niche community. But we likely arent the only targets. And as a friend reminded me tonight, it doesnt take much to move the needle.

#paris/torres #star trek fandom #the troll anon #racism #if you do happen to be the anon the easiest way to prove im wrong is to make a burner account and come talk to me #tell me what parts of my fics you found problematic im really not afraid to hear it

[reflections-in-a-critical-eye]

Hey there BMT

Happy new year

So...after today's Tae Wlive...I was left feeling a bit confused

Okay to be honest...ever since the solo chapter two era began...I deleted my twitter account and it has been one of the best decisions I made...but in my journey as an Army...Tae has always rubbed me the wrong way and I couldn't really pinpoint what exactly it was about him because when you first come into this fandom it is ot7 kumbaya all the time....so I can't help but realize Tae doesn't like being left out on being in the spotlight...he is someone who seems to know what goes on in the fandom like how most of his solo stans are shippers of him and the maknae...and how said shippers are one of the biggest reasons this fandom is going to shit and how they portray he's supposed soulmate..so...it's how he always comes online when one of the other members is on the spotlight for some reason and he feels the need to name drop the maknae..like today...he comes on for two minutes,comes back and mentions how he is with the maknae and friends but he decided to do the live cause he was bored...plus I found it a bit weird how he didn't mention Jihope being in Paris....considering he likes fashion...something so big and new and exciting for his bandmates,his family,friends...but instead go on and just rally up his psycho cult by adding innuendos with strawberries and "pineapples?"....and I'm just wondering JK couldn't even pop in his head for a second to say hi but then I sit down and remember he likes to lie?troll?be funny? So many narratives to explain away his behaviour....anyways...what was the purpose of all this....you are one of the bangtan fans who is so level headed and I wanted to know if I'm just tripping..

Have an amazing day/night

Alright, I think it's time for a real talk here. I'm not going to mince my words because I don't care what anyone says. I'm no Army, you all know where I stand, so let's fucking go.

This fandom is made of butthurt, two-faced, kumbaya, fruity bangtan-lover people who are rarely able to show some spine because they're too afraid of losing their clout on twitter and their followers on tumblr. They're so programmned to believe that a bunch of seven men are the epitome of perfection, unable to do something even worthy of mentioning any type of criticism because they all live in this fairytale-like world. They are super human, incapable of actions and emotions that govern the daily lives of us, the inferior human race. Well guess what? Believing it doesn't make it real.

We can like nasty people and we can dislike them for the same damn reasons. We can dislike nice people and we can love those good people all the same. And guess what? BTS are people. Tae is one of them. Rm is one of them. Jimin. Yoongi and so on. And we can like BTS, while at the same time, not like some of the things they say or do. It's not the end of the world, the sky won't fall on us. Just as we have complex emotions and reactions towards the people in our own lives and towards our own self. I know I'm seen as some Tae/RM anti. Unfortunately for those people, I can never give them the satisfaction because I don't have a ''hate Tae today and talk shit about him'' on my to-do list every day. And they can say I'm biased and I only care about two people in BTS and I see them as perfect and I get frustrated when someone else talks shit about them. Yeah dude, I do care only about two of them. There ya go. The Earth is still spinning. And you know what? I can dislike stuff about them too.

I don't like Jimin treating the fandom as if they're all kids and even going as far as to cover a damn photo on a hotel wall. It's stupid and it won't help and he's part of the problem. I once thought that Jungkook is going to do something more artistic in the future because I saw the potential after My Time, but for now, all he did was confirm how damn basic he is from an artistic pov. I think he made a wrong decision making that song for the World Cup in Qatar and it shows that money comes first. I don't like RM because he's pretentious as fuck. I don't like Hobi because he's too damn loud and as a fan, I couldn't give a flying fuck about his presence at FW or what brand deals he gets. I think Jin is severely out of touch and money does that to you.I think Tae is insecure for no fucking damn reason, but he is. I think Yoongi can be so damn insensitive sometimes and he doesn't know when to shut up. And, for the sake of inclusivity and fairness, I'll add myself too in this dislike fest (not that I'm some world superstar and I have no fans, but you know what I mean).I am a selfish bitch that tends to ghost people. I have ex-friends that probably hate me and I don't blame them.

What does all this mean? That my opinions are facts? That the aspects I've mentioned reflect someone's entire being? That when I look at Hobi, all I see is an obnoxius loud guy? No. Of course not. He's not just that because none of us are only one thing. Layers, people. As simple as that. And if I or anyone else ends up thinking that Tae is insecure and doesn't like being left out, then so be it. Just as I mentioned all that stuff that I personally don't like, there are many more reasons that still make me enjoy them. They're not horrible people worthy of being burned at the stake. But one bad word and this fandom acts like that's exactly what one means when they are not a fan of a BTS member. Then they jump to call people antis, bitches, cunt whores and every other insult. Because that's certainly nicer that any sort of criticism made towards BTS, but it's an acceptable and desired form of bullying. If this was twitter or perhaps my inbox after this text is posted, some will jump and say that Tae would burn me to keep himself and JK warm. Oh no, I'm about to cry and do my penance and apply 30 lashes on my naked body.

Everything is so absurd and every day when I go on twitter and come here, I'm taking the bad pill on purpose so I can enter this alternative reality. And I accept that, I made my bed. But I'm also not going to be some sheep that parrots whatever this fandom deems acceptable.

So yes, anon. I don't blame you for thinking this. Yes, it does seem to look like a pattern. Why? I don't fucking know. Why doesn't it seem genuine? Because there's a history of lying for no damn reason. No one in their right mind should be upset that he's hanging out with his bandmate (be it in person or playing online games). That's not the problem here. It's just that it has become such a habit of only him doing this one-side whatever the fuck he is trying to do, that I had a bunch of people in my inbox from one-two weeks ago saying that this exact thing will happen at the right moment. And it did. I say we should place some bets next time. It will be more fun.

Why does he suffer from a bad case of mimetic desire? Is it needed? Not from an outsider pov, but I have no idea what insecurities Tae has. Except from that time he told Jungkook during their ITS talk that he uses weverse to get some love from fans because he was indeed insecure at that time. So, that tells you something. Which means, it's not completely out of the realm of all possibilities that some of the stuff he does can be on purpose. I'm glad I'm not a Tae stan or some ot7 army cause I would feel kinda shitty seeing Tae's attitude towards his fans. He laughts at them on Weverse while they believe they're laughing together. Look at how the others are using a live stream to connect with the fans they so much love, while he uses that because he's bored for 5 minutes. What is he? A teenage girl that gets bored after the guys come over? Is this high school? I didn't know he's some 16 year old cause at least his behavior would make more sense. But his fans thinks this is cool behavior, except he's a rebel without any cause that makes threats when the Paradise heir gets dragged in a scandal and other times he's keeping his mouth shut. Anyway......

And if we're dropping names (which doesn't happen just with JK, it's only that he's the main character lately) and if JK was there too, why couldn't he just give a shout and call him to say hi to his beloved fans? No one would think it's weird. We have footage of all the group hanging out together for years everywhere. Either tell him to shut up cause he's about to be live and doesn't want anyone to know, or actually do something? Cause this is what I don't get? Making situations be odd when it's not necessary. Now, it's not confirmed that JK is actually there, it could be just a theory and people having bad hearing and apparently Jungkook can sing like shit sometimes. We don't know.

And I don't want to hear anyone saying he doesn't know his stans and his shippers. First of all, they all do and second of all, he's on damn twitter and there's evidence of that. No, he doesn't have to call out his fans, but why rile them up? But then again, all of them are like that, so there's no escape.

Tae doesn't need to go live and talk about Paris Fashion Week and what his bandmates did. He's not the news so he can cover all the events that are happening. But the timing...like clockwork, every single time. Sometimes it's during and sometimes immediately after. Now he waited a day. Good for him, he's being considerate. If anyone would have to patience to look at the bts archive for the last half of year, I bet the pattern is more easily recognizable.

The point to all this and I'm going to end this post cause it got way too long, celebrities (that includes BTS) are people like everyone else. They put themselves in the public eye which means that everyone else watching them is bound to draw conclusions. Some are favorable and others are not. And saying that Tae seems to want some spotlight and he's not very nice sometimes is not a smear campaign. Whoever believes that, get a life. You have no idea what that means. But this fandom distorts all sense of reality and the actual meaning of words.

People can like Tae for exactly the same reasons I don't. I wish he would be an actual bad boy. That would make him at least interesting. I like shitty people. I like nice people who do shitty things. I like people who are considered persona non grata. So what? So if his fans like Tae for who he is, then absolutely fine. But then I can also say that I don't. That's the basics of all of this.

And one last thought. I can't truly take someone seriously or argue with them in some weird act of defending men. I value myself a bit more than that. So whoever wants to be an Army on a high horse and call me names, you can take them and shove them.

Happy New Year, Anon!

#bmt asks

[unreadpoppy]

Internet 101, Fandoms and curating your online experience

I saw some stuff happening both on tumblr and on twitter (and sometimes even on instagram) regarding some fandom stuff and I wanted to make a post about, but in more of a "How to keep your peace of mind and create a healthy space" sort of post. These are just some things that I do that allow me to have a better experience on the internet as a whole, but especially on fandom spaces, and idk, I wanted to share bc navigating this sort of thing can be hard and it doesn't hurt to try and help.

One thing that I've learned very early on by people who had been on the internet for longer than me is that you do not feed the trolls. Listen. People will post shit to stir the pot, and you giving them attention is falling into their bait.

And I get it, I'm human too, I see someone talking shit and I feel the urge to give them a lenghty reply but at some point you gotta stop and think: is this worth it? like, i'm getting mad over a rando on the internet who'll probably just laugh at me. Even if we really feel like answering, it's probably always better to let it go.

And while I'm on the topic, I also want to say the following: no matter how many good arguments you have, no matter how eloquent you are, you cannot change people's minds. I've tried it and all it did was make me stressed. And especially with regards to bigots, they will not change their minds, so don't give them your time and your peace of mind because they do not care about you or your feelings. I'm a queer disabled latina woman, I get it, it sucks and it will always suck, but people will not change what they think because of lenghy ass paragraph someone on the internet sent them, so it's better to just...move on.

And by move on, I do mean do not interact in any way, shape or form. Just...scroll past it. Because it's not worth it, it truly is not, and more likely then not, even by just giving the post or person a small bit of attention, you could cause a whole situation. Do not give people clout, because then they'll get the satisfaction of both having attention AND causing such a reaction from another person.

Like, speaking from experience here, I have received a few hateful/mean spirited anons on my inbox over the years and you wanna know something? You will not find those asks on my blog because I have a 0 tolerance for hate anons. Replying to them only generates more hate anons (trust me, I've seen that happen to other people). When you show someone that you're not affected by the shit they're saying, they'll move on because you are no longer a target. This is why is so important to know when to not interact and just continue moving on.

Still on this topic but more related to fandom. People will have different opinions then you. People will have different HCs then you. People will misinterpret your favorite character. Hell, I've seen takes on my faves that honestly insult my intellect and you know what I did?

Let it go. Just scrolled past, made a mental note not to interact with that person, because again, people won't change their minds. And people are entitled to have their opinions, and enjoy characters in a different way then you do, and the best thing to do is not give them your time. Just don't. It's much better (and probably healthier) to spend your time interacting with people you like and who you can talk to then try to change a person's opinion and pottentialy instigate a fight.

For the sake of not making the same point again and again, I want to talk about blocking people, bc blocking people is the easiest way to curate your experience. There is no morality in blocking. You're not some evil bastard or a super hero because you blocked someone, so don't ascribe morality to that. Just block whoever (and whatever, because blocking tags exist) you don't want to see and move on.

Finally, my last advice is: somethings are best kept private and by private I mean get yourself some friend who you can just talk shit about to. Listen, sometimes the urge to be like "this bitch online is an idiot" is BIG and the best thing you can do about it, in a way that won't cause a fight or whatever, is to go to some friend and say "let me talk shit for a few minutes". Trust me, IT WORKS. So many times I've been tempted to say stuff, only to go to a friend and talk about the stuff and then boom, I was done. I was okay. So yeah, there's stuff that is better to be sent in a groupchat then to be posted about.

This post is longer than I intended but I feel like we should try to just have fun? This is the internet, the good part about it is that we can choose who we can engage with and what we want to say, and it's way more productive to spend your time with people that matter, that you care about and that make you happy then stressing over people who simply do not care and who will not change.

Anyways, peace out

#idk what to tag bc this is truly cause i wish everyone could just have a better time around #like i've done a lot of the things i advice against doing so i do speak from experience #i just want people to be kind to themselves and others #also more a fandom thing but can we stop resurfacing the same discussions again and again? #it'll take no one nowhere #anyways biggest take away from this is that sometimes it's just better to move on #fandom

[rawliverandgoronspice]

Hey, just wanted to say I love reading your analysis and thank you for being a ‘pioneer’ in TOTK critique on tumblr haha. Lately I started seeing more criticism videos popping up on youtube that are solid, but your analysis is still much more detailed and presents original and valid points. You really helped me to define and put down into words some subconscious feelings that I had about the game. I feel really bad for you (but not in a pitying way) when I see blogs like ‘zeldadeservesabreak’ who come at your analysis skills and are just so unreasonably rude unprovoked (aside from being just factually incorrect at times).

My theory is that it’s their maturity. My theory is that this happens because there are younger fans of the series who seek to have a deeper analysis and discussion about the narrative and aim to sound like a worthy debate opponent who is certain about their position and due to beginners confidence and inexperience in debate come off way too strong. Another small point to add, it peaks my curiosity seeing such devotion to a corporation (Nintendo). I ‘technically’ know why and how it happens, but I’m still always surprised to see someone being so devoted to defending and speaking for Nintendo.

Just wanted to assure you that there are us who greatly appreciate you sharing your thoughts and STILL engaging with questionable Asks after this. I wait for each post or reblog with anticipation and will share your blog with my friends as soon as they finish TOTK as they were really intrigued by the imperialist Rauru depiction. On the other hand, please don’t feel pressured to continue posting if it all gets too much at any point! Thank you for reading all of this if you did! Sorry for any mistakes and poor vocabulary, English is not my native language.

Hello!

Thank you so, so very much for this very kind ask. <3 And I'm sorry it took me a little long to get around to it, I am sick and my brain is not very cooperative. :(

I am really glad to know that there are more conversations happening outside of this little sphere. I scoured for these criticisms on Youtube in the first month and then pretty much gave up when they weren't coming up. I'm glad the conversation is widening, and I hope it keeps on happening over the years --not to hurt the game or its community, but just to encourage critical thought for one, and also just so Nintendo does a little better next time.

It might be maturity, but I am not... How do I put it. I don't think it is so much a question of age or even life experience than it being a question of, well, willingness to see yourself get destabilized a little bit. To me, a lot of the hostility that I've seen directed at these kind of theories are often extremely dismissive of the place they come from; they assume either overzealousness ( = you are seeing problems where there are none for ??? profit??? or just to pretend that you are morally purer than everybody else, which is a statement that never once looked like projection), confusion ( = don't you see the game tells you that this is good and this is bad ?), or bad faith ( = you are here to stir trouble for no reason, you are a troll). Very rarely do they actually engage with the arguments, but rather with the aesthetic quality of it; the way it rings to their ear, the way it is presented, and the intent they assume that led to these arguments being made in the first place. The best counter-arguments I have heard thus far who actually take what is being said into account can either be boiled down to: "I see your point, but it just doesn't bother me that much because of X, Y and Z who really touched me emotionally and I got invested in that (which is great and super valid in my opinion)", or: "I think Nintendo just didn't think about the effect of this decision and the way it weakened what they wanted to do, but I think the overall story of what they wanted to say overrules the way they achieved it, and I prefer focusing on the first rather than the latter (which is also completely legitimate)". I have not, so far, seen a better rebuttal than: it does not bother me personally for X or Y reason, but I am not denying that these might be problems to somebody else.

But yeah. It is the childhood, it is the safe space, it is good and uncomplicated, and so anything that hurts that wonderful piece of innocence that remains must be there with bad intentions. I assume this plays a huge role in the Nintendo Protection Squad, even when the criticism is honestly pretty mild all things considered.

(Also, if I may and as I close this subject: I think this is pretty interesting how it's only unreasonable to ask for a stronger narrative. If the combat had been subpar in TotK, I would not have cared that much personally honestly, but I'm pretty sure a *lot* of people would have complained and been extremely pissed at that, and this would have been an acceptable complaint to have --like the lack of dungeons was an acceptable complaint to wage against BotW. I don't think a great combat system with a lot of variation in approach is particularly more "the spirit of Zelda" than a simple, solid and well constructed story, but a lot of BotW players would probably disagree. Which is fine, the series is evolving, new standards are introduced! But why is this one the only standard that seems to be a reach too far, an unrealistic demand, something that *should* stay a non-priority even though it once clearly was one? Gamers and their approach to storytelling will forever perplex me honestly, which sucks given it's my job but whatever, you make your own hell etc)

But yeah. To be honest, I think a lot of people who don't really understand the "imperialist argument" do not lack for media literacy or analysis or maturity (I kind of am super tired of people throwing the "you have no media literacy!" at each other while never defining what they mean by that or never actually discussing what they actually disagree about), but maybe they do lack a little bit of political culture; especially culture about political communication. Which makes sense not to have or focus on a lot when you play a Zelda game, so. It's fine. vOv

It also does not escape my notice how a lot of the reticence to accept criticism gets the most virulent around the portrayal of power dynamics and race; even though I don't think any progressive fandom faced with a story that could be boiled down to "the good kingdom of the blonde, petite, blue-eyed heroes is invaded by a huge evil man from the desert with very racialized features who forcefully rules his all-women warriors in harem garbs" should bat an eye when some people say this sort of premice makes them uncomfortable and so should be handled very carefully, especially given the global rise of fascism, anti-immigration, and deadly islamophobia everywhere right now. It boggles my mind that this is even considered a controversial statement.

Like, discussing the shade and depth of Rauru's goatman *fur* as a way to counter the criticism that what birthed the character of Ganondorf is 5 racist tropes in a trenchcoat and should be navigated with more care than this is 2023 is so... deeply unserious to me. You know, sometimes things are a little iffy and can be acknowledged as such and then you can still like the Thing and it's fine, you don't even have to engage with the parts that make you uncomfortable, it's fine it's fineee.

But no need to worry about the effect of these kind of interactions on me, though it is very sweet to do so! <3 Let's say I'm not going to bed every night worrying about my critical thinking skills, my media literacy, or wondering whether or not I understand interactive narration haha

I am a little tired of talking about TotK in general tho, to be fully honest. I feel like I've kind of scraped the bottom of my takes, and I don't have a lot more to add --so the asks will probably slow down just by virtue of not repeating myself eternally, and wanting to extract myself from some of the discourse happening (also I just don't care enough about the game to put this much energy into it, it was never really meant to happen I just started receiving tons asks for some reason??? (thank you all!! it was really an Experience!!!! but thank you!!!) and then I replied to them, and then that got me more asks, etc etc, but yeah I never planned to talk about TotK that much haha)

But thank you so very very much again!

#asks #totk critical #ganondorf #zelda fandom critical #when will my brain return from the imprisoning war... #thank you for the ask!!!! #it was truly really really nice #kind of went off in a million directions like usual haha #and I did......... vaguepost. at some point #but also. what. #also don't worry English also isn't my native language <3

[author-a-holmes]

Obviously ignore this if you want but I saw you mention that you recently got published (congrats!!!) and I had a question. I'm still far out from that, but I know how to write and can research how to publish but I don't know how to market. Not only am I autistic and not charismatic, I want to solely use my pen name and distance my writing from my face because of my professional life. Do you know how to actually get people who might like your book to notice that it exists as an indie author with no previous following? Thank you if you have any advice!

Hello Moshke!

Thank you so much for the congratulations! It's taken longer than I expected but the realisation that I'm published is finally beginning to sink in! It's very surreal ^_^

I honestly don't know if I'm the right person to give advice on marketing as, at the moment, my book's been out just over a month and I feel like I'm stumbling around in the dark, but I wanted to give your ask due consideration and, despite my hesitation, I think I still have some tips that could hopefully help.

The reason I think I might have at least some relevant tidbits is that I'm also writing under a penname and most people don't seem to realise that.

Now, in my case, it's not about privacy it's just that don't like my given name enough to see it on book covers :D So I don't mind talking about it, but marketing your book under a penname isn't that much different to how you would market the book under your legal name.

Tip No. 1

Establish your pen name as a functional pseudonym now. Don't wait until you're ready to publish.

So, this stage was a little backwards for me. I come from the age of internet use where you did not give your real name online, under any circumstances, so I've always used various "online names".

By the time I decided that I was going to use "Arista Holmes" to publish under, anyone who knew me online already knew me as Ari. Even my best friend offline will sometimes call me Ari when we're chatting, so it had become as much an actual nickname as an online pseudonym.

But that's exactly what I'm getting at. I'm not pretending to be "Arista Holmes", I am Ari. A writer in her 30's based in the south east of England. The same way I'm Josie to my mum, or Jo-jo to my Godmother.

Tip No. 2

Don't think about it as marketing your book, but as creating an author "brand".

I'm using "Brand" here in the absence of a better term, because I absolutely hate thinking about this as a "brand", but what I mean is think of your Penname as something people will google search.

In fact, Google search your pen name.

As I mentioned, I'd been using "Arista Holmes" online for a while, and I had accounts all over the place that I didn't necessarily want coming up when people looked up my books.

(I will deny spending my youth on Neopets, it's just TOO embarrassing!) 

But jokes aside; Google your pen name. See what comes up. Scroll through all 20, 30, 50 pages of google. Some asshole looking for some embarrassing post from your teen years won't stop at page five, and neither should you.

Shut down any accounts you find, or if you want to keep them, change the username to something else. The only non-publishing related account linked to Arista Holmes now is my AO3. I figure it's still writing, so no harm in leaving that one up.

Tip No. 3

Set up social media accounts now; Be as consistent as possible across all platforms.

Now, and I want to put this in big bold letters:

Having accounts on all the socials does not mean you will be active on all of them.

Or use them at all, in fact.

Having accounts on Facebook, Tumblr, Instagram, Twitter, Tiktok, Youtube, etc etc etc, just means that if, by some miracle, you make it big and draw in fans you'll also inevitably draw trolls and by making the account with your pen name; it stops them claiming that username and pretending to be you.

It's a form of pre-emptive protection.

On that note; Be consistent across your accounts. Use the same profile picture, use the same header or banner, use the same colour scheme, use the same "About Me/About Author" description, and (as much as possible) use the same username format.

That last one won't be possible on all platforms. Some of them don't like periods/full stops. Some don't like underscores, but try to be as consistent as possible.

For example my account on here is author.a.holmes, most other places I'm aristaholmes. I'd change it, but at this point, I don't want to break all my links.

Tip No. 4

Author Pictures Are Not Required.

I'm adding this point here because I mentioned profile pictures in the previous tip. Author Pictures Are Not Required.

Don't get me wrong, they're often highly encouraged, and I can't deny that they give a humanising effect to the author, but that doesn't mean you actually have to show your face.

I've chosen to put my face on my "About The Author" page in the back of my book, but that's a personal choice. You don't have to add one at all! It's only more recently that I've seen fiction author photos in the back of books.

Until about... 15 years ago? Ish? I wouldn't have expected to see an author photo unless the book was non-fiction.

If you want to add a picture of you, but don't feel comfortable or can't because of real world problems, consider an artist's caricature instead. Go one step further than a pen-name and give yourself a pen-picture! Jenna Moreci uses an artist's interpretation as her profile picture/logo, and Lemony Snicket only had pictures of the back of his head for ages.

If you do decide to commission an artist though, do explain to them that it will be included in your books, that you'll be selling, as they will probably want to add a commercial licence price to the artwork; But if you explain why you're having the caricature done I imagine most artists would be very reasonable about it.

***

That's all my tips for setting up and marketing yourself, as the author, under a pen name... but I can already hear the voices in my head muttering that I've not really touched on how to get people to find you once you've set up the pen name, and the socials, and your website etc.

And it's because I personally think that if you're writing under a pen name you need to establish it as an entity in its own right before beginning to try marketing it.

So, moving on…

Tip No. 5

Find your place on the great, wide, interwebs...

I mentioned I'd been online as Arista Holmes for about 8-10 years prior to deciding to publish under this name, but once I did decide to publish I went and made all my author socials (just like I mentioned in Tip No. 3)

That was in 2020 and it was part experimentation, and part letting people find me. I knew I wasn't going to be able to keep up with multiple social media's, and I also knew I didn't WANT to, so I made the socials and I started posting on each platform and figuring out which platforms I liked. Which ones were easy to use, and which ones got me the most engagement with other people.

For me, this turned out to be Tumblr and Instagram. Twitter and Facebook are like graveyards for me, and Tiktok is only a little better, but your mileage may vary.

I cross post consistently with Tumblr, Instagram, because those are the places I get the most engagement... but I also maintain a blog on my website and any big pieces of news (such as asking for ARC readers, or publishing my book) gets posted across ALL platforms because, well, I live in hope that one day my tiktok will go viral lol.

But honestly, the multiple socials literally eat up so much of the time I could spend writing; I highly recommend picking two, three at most, and focusing on them.

But what do you post? I can almost hear you yelling <3

Tip No. 6

How to market when you're shy/introverted/not-charismatic/or any other thing you feel is holding you back.

You're going to want to throw something at me but lean on your strengths. It sounds so simple, and I know it's not, I'm sorry, but here's what I mean by that.

When I was still experimenting with all the socials to find the ones I liked, I stumbled across an image. I want to say it was here on tumblr but, honestly, I don't remember and at the time I was neck deep in every marketing and promotional blog or article I could find trying to figure this shit out.

It was called "The Periodic Table of Content Marketing".

I don't know why this helped me wrap my head around marketing, but it did.

I read over each of the types of marketing and I started getting idea's.

Ebooks... I'd heard about people doing reader magnets for newsletter lists.

Interviews... I've seen authors on podcasts. I'd seen people on tumblr interviewing their characters. I could do that.

Trends... What are popular tropes if not trends of the moment?

And I suddenly realised that this silly little graph was all the different types of marketing I could do, broken down simply, and laid out neatly, and I could pick and choose not only the bits I was comfortable doing, but the bits that I was confident with.

I'm never going to put my face on a tiktok video and lipsync to popular songs, but I could write a 12,000 words short story prequel to my series and make it exclusive to newsletter subscribers.

That was something I could do, because it leaned on my strengths; My writing.

Because I haven't said it yet, but two years ago I'd have described myself very similarly to you.

I'm not charismatic. While I'm not autistic, I am painfully introverted. I have severe social anxiety. I'm not funny, I can't talk with strangers casually or easily. Talking about my book more than once a week feels like I'm bragging or being pushy... But I can write.

So I started looking for opportunities to share my writing, and let it... not speak for itself, but let my words draw in the audience. It still took a bit of pushing on my part, I would look for tag games where the user had left an "Open Tag" and I'd hop on those and share some words.

This is part of the reason Tumblr is one of my favourite places to network with writers and readers, because the tag games let me share and tease content without having to push through my social anxiety all that hard.

It's a slower, organic, audience growth but it's definitely my preference.

The content I shared on here, produced to play tag games, I quickly realised that I could copy it onto a pretty image in canva, and share it on instagram easier than I could condense a paragraph into the twitter character limit, or make it look appealing on Facebook's janky system.

And the more writing I shared, the more people commented and followed. And the more they commented and followed, the easier it was to talk to them. And then I started getting asks. That was nerve wracking and sometimes they'll still sit there a couple of months before I can make myself answer them.

(Sorry Sleepy and Avra, if you're reading this! I'll reply soon, I promise!)

Have I gone off topic here? I kind of feel like I have but also... not really.

If you feel like your writing is your strength, lean on it. Let it do the heavy lifting for you. Show your hand with your words.

By the time I set up my mailing list and offered 'Whatever Happened To Madeline Hail?' for free, I got 12 people to sign up straight away. I don't know if that's a lot, but it was at least eight more than I was expecting.

When my book launched, I received 14 reviews, and sold 20 copies the first month. Again, I don't know if this is a lot, but it was a whole hecking lot more than I'd hoped for.

I don't know if I'm good at marketing, and maybe someone will reblog and reply to this with better advice, or tear apart what I've said, and if they do great! I really hope it helps you or someone else down the reblog chain because, as I said at the start, I'm really just stumbling around in the dark and hoping I somehow get it all to work out lol

But I do just have one more piece of advice, that isn't really my advice...

Tip No. 7

Fake it until you make it.

You're a writer. The beauty of the internet is that we have time to stop, and think about the words we're writing in response to someone.

I'm a shy, introvert, who doesn't know when to shut up when she gets started talking about writing (Or at least that's what it looks like based on the length of this post...)

But 99% of people I speak to online don't know I'm an introvert. They don't know that after sending an email I have to go back to bed for a few hours to recover my energy, or that I can't answer a phone without feeling nauseous for the rest of the day and it's because when I'm online I'm Arista Holmes, and I can write my responses in the same way I write my characters.

I'm not saying I'm not being me, I am, but I'm also being given the time and space to be the confident me I want to be, rather than the nervous wreck I actually am.

Write your socials, and market your book, as the you that you’d write if you were dropped into one of your own books.

Fake it until you make it.

Handy Resource List For Marketing:

Periodic Table of Content Marketing

Jenna Moreci's Youtube - I take her writing advice with a huge chunk of salt, but her marketing advice is top notch.

Bethany Atazedah Youtube - Co-wrote a Marketing For Authors Non-fiction series, but a lot of her youtube videos contain good, free, advice too.

Self-Publishing With Dale - If you want to market effectively, keeping on top of the current trends and changes in the market is important. Self Publishing with Dale is the best way I've found to do that; He really has his fingers on the pulse of the Self Publishing Market, and even if you're not publishing yet, checking out some of his videos can teach you loads about what to do, but more importantly, what NOT to do.

Michael Anderle's 20Bookto50k system - I didn't mention it as a tip but the BEST form of marketing a book is to write the next book. Michael Anderle talks about his theory that is you have 20 books published, your backlist of royalty income should net you around $50k a year. The hour and a half talk changed my whole marketing outlook and is why I'm focussed on a slow grown, more organically sourced, audience rather thank paid advertising.

Abbie Emmons Youtube - I'm not sure I should include Abbie in a list of marketing resources as she's often more about the writing side of the craft, but her videos have been invaluable to me, so she's just worth checking out in general.

#Ari Speaks #Arista Speaks #Ari Gives Advice #Ari is unqualified to give advice #Marketing #Marketing under a penname #Penname #Pen Name #Pseudonym #Content Marketing #Publishing #Self Publishing #Building An Audience #Growing An Audience #Writeblr #Writeblr Community #Writing #Writing Community #CW: Mental Health #CW: Social Anxiety #CW: Anxiety #TW: Mental Health #TW: Anxiety #TW: Social Anxiety #Ask #Ask Answered

[batboyblog]

Nagging potential voters while offering them nothing has been a losing political strategy every time it's been tried. If you actually care about wresting political power from fascists - yes I am questioning your commitment - you'll get involved in on-the-ground organizing instead of acting like an asshole online. Because I cannot stress this enough: what you're doing here on tumblr? That hurt us in 2004. And 2016. And a bunch of the off-years too. Knock it off. And before you complain about my tone: I'm using the same one you did in your post. If reading this made you upset, maybe sit for a while and think about the implications of that.

lol, I honestly can't tell you how much this makes me laugh so thanks for the early morning comedy

I don't actually have any idea which of my MANY posts you found and decided to have an issue with.

Any ways, I have a Tumblr, which is mostly non-serious because in real life, my real life my real work is very serious and political and this generally is a decompression space away from that were I can express other interests, US Senators generally don't want to hear my take on comic books (well Pat Leahy....)

I'm not gonna lay out chapter and verse what I've done or do because I'm not doxing myself for an anon troll, but last election I knocked over 2,000 doors for Democratic candidates, I've been pretty open that I was HFA in 2016 and OFA before that

so generally in most of my posts I'm asking, basically begging people, to get as involved as I am, well maybe not AS involved, you don't all need jobs In politics someone has to drive the buses after all. But its very easy as a volunteer to make a huge huge impact on your local Democratic Party and on elections around you and it's amazingly healing to get out and talk to voters, a day of walking around knocking doors and talking to voters will cure you of wanting to dive bomb a strangers in box with nonsense like this.

any ways since I was you know, there, in 2004 and I'm gonna go out on a limb here and assume (since you assumed quite a lot about me) We lost that election because the Bush team totally shamelessly claimed our famous war hero candidate had in fact faked his Purple Hearts and hadn't earned his Sliver and Bronze Stars. Also they pretty shamelessly implied that a vote for Democrats was a vote for terrorism and stressed to evangelical voters that they'd ban gay marriage forever and always if Bush won re-election, which I think was very key to pulling Bush over the finish line in Ohio (and the election as a whole)

Not that that matters the "Nagging" narrative is silly, and mainly used by people who want to not feel bad for not voting being engaged. That its somehow Democrats fault for asking them to vote and pointing out the negative things that will happen if Republicans win. Thats how all campaigns since the dawn of time have worked however. All Campaigns are a mix of two things "here are the good things I would like to do" and "here are the bad things my opponent will do if they win" there's no way to campaign without the latter duh.

any ways like I said Tumblr is my silly happy place, but I'm still me, so sometimes I shoot off about the real life topics that matter to me. And here on Tumblr sometimes I can be blunter and ruder than I might on social media linked to my real life, thats not gonna change or anything I'm just saying.

finally I hope everyone gets involved, its fun its easy it makes a big difference, google your city or county and "Democrats" to find a local meeting, Everyone should check out The Sister District project, Swing Left, and Run For Something as I've said else where there are important elections happening all the time, Democrats have a chance to win the Governorship in Mississippi a dear friend of mine is down there right now working that and I couldn't be more proud of his unwavering efforts to blue the south (he helped get Andy Beshear elected in 2018) so random troll anon I hope you're doing more than uh... whatever this is, I'm gonna keep doing my thing.

#politics #elections #vote #voting #2024 election #ask #answered

[thrillingdetectivetales]

This is a total long shot, but I'm looking for a series of Harringrove fics that appears to have been taken off AO3. The series is at least two fics, but may be more (I can't fully recall) and I think both parts were fairly long. I don't remember the titles of the individual stories or the series or the author, because my brain is a sieve, but I put a quick rundown of what plot/details I remember under a read more below. If anybody either has a download of this fic, knows where I can get one, or remembers the author/titles so I can try my hand with the Wayback Machine, I would really appreciate it. (Spoilers ahead, obviously, and caveat that there's a chance I may be misremembering some of these from other Harringrove fic I've read):

Billy meets Eleven fairly early on, and I believe that at first he mishears her name as Ellen, but he eventually moves into calling her Elijane. Later on, toward the end of the first story/beginning of the second, he runs into Eleven (on her way to Chicago/to find her mom, maybe?) and offers to take her because he needs to get out of town to clear his head after a fight with Steve (detailed later). Their car gets run off the road and they get kidnapped by lab people.

Midwayish through the first story, I want to say, Hopper or someone intervenes on behalf of Billy with Neil and he winds up in his own apartment. He buys a couch or a whole set of furniture or something that's red.

Billy and Steve have their first kiss after they get into an altercation with Tommy and either some of his friends or maybe cousins, where they're walking down the street and Tommy throws a beer can at them. They throw it back and hit Tommy in the face or something and then go running. They end up in an alley together late at night hiding and that's where they have their first kiss.

Billy catches Steve wearing glasses he doesn't normally wear in public and Steve gets super self-conscious about it at first. He also has two german shepherds named Luke and Leia. When Billy first meets them, while Steve is out walking them near the garage where Billy works, he plays with them and asks "Are you a puppy?"

At one point, Lucas sees Steve and Billy together before they're out, and Billy goes full rage mode on him like an asshole. Steve gets big mad for obvious reasons and they sort of separate until Billy apologizes and gets his shit together. He does eventually go to apologize to Lucas, after which he goes to apologize to Steve. Steve is hanging out at his place with Nancy, because he needs to talk to someone about stuff with Billy, and Billy mistakenly deduces that they're together. This is why he's driving along and sees El on her way to wherever she's going before they get kidnapped.

When Steve and Billy try to have penetrative sex the first time, it isn't very good. I believe because they'd been drinking and having a celebration of sometime and don't communicate well. They try again a second time and it goes way better.

Steve calls Billy "Bill" a fair amount and the author, while writing in Billy's voice, describes the kids as yapping pretty frequently. They also tend to write, 'says, "Ha ha ha!"' instead of 'laughs' which I thought was very endearing and delightful.

I don't remember the specific wording but at one point there's a bit that's sort of like, "Steve is a bitch but fuck yeah that's Billy's bitch."

I know it's not a ton to go on but I'm getting back into Stranger Things fandom recently and was so devastated the other day when I trolled through as many posted Harringrove fic over 80k as I could and didn't see it anywhere.

Any help is appreciated! Feel free to shoot me a DM here on Tumblr/reply to this post. I don't usually see Tumblr messages but you can give that a shot too. Otherwise I'm on Discord as thrillingdetectivetales, too, and you can message me there as well.

Thanks in advance for any assistance!!

#harringrove #looking for a fic #lost fic #stranger things #harringrove fic #steve x billy #billy hargrove x steve harrington #fic finder #reblogs welcome

[who-is-page]

Hello I've got a friend who thought they kff but are now thinking they might be fictionkin of the "identifying partially" type and I was wondering if you had some good resources? (They didn't know anything about fictionkin prev to this revelation. It kinda came out because I thought one of their friends were fictionkin but they were kff but nonmaliciously which sounds like an oxymoron but its more ignorance than anything else and they have no issues with fictionkin) I'm kinda struggling on what to send them to educate them further on fictionkin expierences in order to help them figure themselves out.

I actually answered a similar question asking for fictionkin resources a month ago-- I'm going to link what I had there to here, but I also want you to know that decent, beginner-friendly fictionkin resources can be kind of hard to come by. If your friend is outside the alterhuman sphere entirely, it might be good to introduce them to otherkin overall first, and then lean into fictionkin-specific experiences? Regardless, here you go:

A Timeline of the Fictionkin Community by House of Chimeras (liongoatsnake) - A PDF timeline of events that have taken place within or related directly to the fictionkin community. Spans from 1979 to the start of 2021.

FromFiction’s Fictionkin FAQ by FromFiction - An FAQ on fictionkin and fictionkin experiences.

Fictionkin.org - Connected to the FromFiction Tumblr, this is a metaphysical fictionkin resource website.

Alterhuman Archive’s Fictionfolk Category - A collection of over a hundred different works by and about fictionfolk. YMMV.

Explanation of Fictionkinity by Luteia (shadowfae) - A Tumblr post by Luteia explaining fictionkinity.

I’m Ben, But Call Me Poppy by Poppy (aestherians) - Poppy explores raer personal fictionkinity and introduces the reader to the reader to the fictionkind experience in general.

Living with a “Problematic” Fictional Identity (And Where to Go from Here) by Goratrix (goratrix-betrayed) - A video lecture followed by questions and discussion about navigating through life with a “problematic” fictotype or as a “problematic” fictive. How to find community, how to cope, what responsibilities we may or may not have, what morality means for us and where the line between choices “then” and choices “now” lies. Panel script available here on Goratrix’s Tumblr.

Why Using the Term Fictionkin Should be a Power Move, Not your Every Day Label by Daski (indornaga) - A Tumblr post in which Daski encourages readers to rethink about how they use the term fictionkin for themselves.

Filling in the Blanks, Part 1: Questioning: Fanworks, Fan Theories, and Filling in the Gaps by Hange - A Tumblr post by Ranthimi discussing canon and its importance (or lack thereof) to fictionkin identities.

Filling In The Blanks, Part 2: The Worlds Are Bigger Than You Think by Hange - A Tumblr post by Hange discussing how and why looking at multiple sources can be beneficial when trying to understand the world a fictionkin identity originated from.

A Different Approach to Fictionkin by Hange - A Tumblr post that explores the idea of viewing fiction as a form of mythology. Kind of part 2.5 to the Filling In The Blanks series.

Filling in the Blanks, Part 3: Additional Permutations to the idea of “Being Fictional” by Hange - A short Tumblr essay on using alternative, external, “noncanon” frameworks for fictionkin identity.

There's also the Fictionkind Dreamwidth, which is a group for fictionfolk to post essays, blog posts, thoughts, fiction, and to comment on one another's work; it's a private community to keep out trolls, but I'd really highly recommend it.

Followers, if you have any further recs, please feel free to drop them in a reblog for this anon!

#Ask #Anonymous #fictionkin #fictionfolk

[hms-no-fun]

i both really wish (and dont wish) cohost had a similar ask system to tumblr because im 300% more comfortable on that website than this one but ive had this particular burning question since i binge read godfeels during a covid ridden fugue

The more general version of this question is: how has optiministDuelist been involved in the writing of godfeels 3.1? (or even the future parts you're working on, if you can do so without spoilers)

The more specific version that makes this a question better suited towards you rather than shooting the question towards optimisticDuelist, and is rather a series of questions extrapolating on the first one is: why did you involve them? are they helping you write dirk or jake? are they providing input/advice? and that goes towards other people you've had help with the project too, if they're comfortable with being spoken about - i was just a fan of od's analyses and was surprised to see his name attached to godfeels! in fact im so curious about the nature/process of collaboration in godfeels it seems reductive to even try to condense it into questions that would be easier/faster to answer, in that i fear that what i put in will be what i get out, and that logically it's silly of me to bank on the fact that you might go more in depth than how these questions may imply on first glance. i fear my words make no sense and rather instill anxiety into the reader. anyway these are more like guidelines for something i was hoping you could talk about

oooooo this is a good one! i've written a fair amount about my collaborations in the past. here's a post where i talk about working with taz on chapter 8.2. here's a post where i talk about working with janet girlpillz on chapter 8.6. and here's a post where i talk about working with julia on the nsfw interlude 'stomach'! and then for bonus points, here's a piece my gf zoe wrote about working with me on the first official godfeels art in chapter 7.

but you want more, so here's more.

to start with, taz and i have been friends for some years now! back in early 2019 i was on the hbomberguy donkey kong 64 stream where i (briefly) tried to defend homestuck, which i guess gained me some form of notoriety/infamy. i can't remember if it was taz or kate who reached out to me first but i know taz liked my stuff (and i liked his!). then kate had me on pgen, i joined the pgen server, we all started gaming together and talking about homestuck in group chats. this period, pretty much through the entirety of 2019, is when i went from feeling like i had zero grasp on homestuck to becoming cohost of an at-the-time popular homestuck theory podcast! it's funny going back to my first appearance on pgen because you can tell i was so in over my head. i couldn't remember the names of the hiveswap trolls and still didn't even really know all the homestuck trolls by name. AND I OPTED OUT OF TALKING ABOUT VRISREZI LMAO. oh how turned the tables did the tables did turn

[[[oh god i just realized the pgen website expired and i'm not sure if the eps are still up anywhere... i should talk to kate about that lmao]]]

anyway, i actually talked to taz a bunch when i was first writing godfeels 1!

shortly after this we all did a stream for the launch of the epilogues with folks from the pgen server as well as hiveswap writer/director aysha u farah. i played gamzee lmao i still have the clown horn app on my phone from that

i guess i don't really know to what extent any of this is common knowledge anymore now that i think about it! this feels sort of superfluous to me but i guess this was FOUR YEARS AGO lmao

early godfeels straight up would not have existed without all these people. i cannot stress enough that literary obsession is a social contagion. i was not born a homestuck, i was made. and i think maybe some of the extremities of gf2 especially feel a little weird or dated these days, because on top of everything else godfeels was responding to it was also responding to the particularly toxic 2019-era vriscourse. so a big part of june's confrontational nature came from me being fucking sick of the baby's-first-conservatism that took root in the wider fandom when us cancelable queers had the audacity to like problematic womens and not apologize for it. i won't say anymore about that because like, whatever, it's all dead and buried now even if the ghost lingers. that ghost will have its day eventually! but not anytime soon.

ANYWAY, so, going back to the beginning even though i wrote godfeels alone, it came about in a context of lengthy conversations with other homestuck theorists. so when gf3 started to blow up in scale and become less about my trauma specifically, it made a lot of sense to broaden my horizons and get some new blood into the mix. the posts i linked at the start will fill in a bunch of gaps for you there, i think. it’s worth noting that a bunch of us already had a history of at least attempting to collaborate. we had a thing building for a while like a visual novel with one choice that was basically, what if we wrote every possible version of “transgender john” and just had them all together as branching paths. this was before some of the broader fandom really dug their heels in on the reactionary transphobia, after which point i at least lost some of my taste for that project. maybe we could come back to it someday, we wrote some cool stuff for that...

as far as my collaborative philosophy goes, idk. i first started writing fiction on the zeldapower forums in the early 2000s and developed a thick skin for critique pretty fast as a result. i wrote and rewrote constantly, shared what i could with friends and talked about plot/story/character ideas with them. when i realized in year two that writing school had nothing to offer me, i transferred to film. but i did so explicitly not wanting to be a director or writer or anyone above the line, really, because i didn't know what i wanted to make or even if i wanted to make something of my own. what i wanted was to help other people realize their own visions and see how they did it. so that's how i ended up working grip/electric in the oklahoma film industry, because it turns out all it really takes to get your foot in the door is to lose the ego and make yourself useful. it helps that i am cursed with constant psychological awareness of absolutely everything in my vicinity at all times, so i gained a reputation for being practically psychic the way i could know exactly what my bosses wanted lighting-wise before they even said anything.

i miss that job tbh. i loved the people, i felt more physically and psychologically fulfilled than at any job i've ever had. oklahoma has a relatively small film scene so it wasn't long before i was on a first name basis with most everyone working on my side of the state. when a crew is all on the same page, man, there's nothing like it. not every set can or should be like this, but some of my favorite experiences were on sets where it felt like everyone was the director. the director had their own vision but they knew how to adapt it to the location, to the ideas of technicians and craftspeople who had their own insights. a good director knows how to let their collaborators take ownership of the work, even when they reject their suggestions! i loved film work and i think about getting back to it sometimes. problem is it's extraordinarily physically demanding work and it leaves no time for anything else. 12 hour days five days a week minimum. i quit because i wanted to focus on video essays, one thing led to another, now we're here and homestuck changed my life lmao

so that's where i come from as writer. i have very strong opinions about my work and what it means and what it needs to do, but i try very hard not to have an ego about it.

the way we work together is pretty simple. when i finish the first draft of a chapter i’ll post it to the work server, and then folks will leave comments. but also, every member of the team has their own little corner of godfeels that they’ve adopted. taz is the dirkjake whisperer, julia is the queen of dana and the upsilons, etc. so when i write these characters i’ll ask for their insight, and invite them to modify or add to the scene as they see fit. sometimes this means prose, sometimes this means dialogue. our understanding is that nothing goes in the final published work without my approval, but that also that nothing is entirely off the table until we’ve had a conversation about it.

i get a lot of my storytelling philosophy from the tv show LOST, where every question was introduced with an explanation in mind but with the caveat that those explanations only remained true until the writers came up with something better. this gets back to something i said yesterday about needing a story to be dynamic and not planning things out too much in advance. for more detailed explanations, here’s a post i wrote about my hooks & hats philosophy, and then here’s another post about my process in general. but basically, i have this massive web of interconnected plotpoints going out very far into the future right? so when someone makes a suggestion i know exactly how possible it is to fit within that framework. i know how much information about any given hook has been introduced, so i know whether one explanation has been seeded too thoroughly to be changed.

but the flipside of that is that now my collaborators are inventing OCs! taz created a fantastic character named xifus that i can’t wait to write more of in 3.2A. we talk about this setting all the time, we talk about what makes sense for it, what would be cool, what mistakes would absolutely RUIN IT, how we can avoid the mistakes of our predecessors, all that fun stuff.

collaboration is all about honesty. godfeels has become what it is because we’re all fans both of homestuck, of anime, of broader culture... and of godfeels. my dirty secret is that i love writing godfeels because i’m its biggest fan. it frequently does not FEEL like i am composing this story, but rather that it is just happening to me. always i am wrangling cats in this petting zoo. i don’t want to be making this thing for the rest of my life but also this story is SO COOL and we are all chomping at the fucking bit to get to the upsilons and so much other shit besides. is that egomaniacal? idk. i think the idea that you’re supposed to be neutral leaning negative on your own work is kinda bullshit. but also, i don’t see the creation of art as bound to suffering or even being a process that requires much expertise. writing isn’t magic, even if it can feel that way sometimes.

i talk a lot about my work and how i write because i want to help demystify the process and try to show that it’s a learnable craft same as anything else. imo the preponderance of mediocre-to-great artists is not proof of Exceptional People but rather that it’s actually dirt simple to become a mediocre-to-great artist. all you need is time and money and access to the right tools! which is why so many mediocre artists are the rich failsons of killfactory millionaires. which is why every artist should be pro student debt relief, pro public transit, pro affordable housing, pro welfare, pro socialized medicine, pro deprivatizing mass media, and pro wide-ranging government arts funding. our nightmare neoliberal media landscape is the result of decades of making the creation of art & culture economically inaccessible to the working class, hence everything being set in rich suburbs with giant houses, hence the inescapability of pro-capitalist pro-nationalist messaging, hence the refusal of all national media to talk to trans people about trans issues, because only the middle and upper classes get to touch the levers of public perception and they have a direct economic incentive to convince the working class that they are middle class.

the notion that this stuff is at all mysterious or naturally the purview of those who can afford expensive degrees is just the narrative they sell to working people to cover up the fact that once you ascend past a certain income bracket, absolutely everything is just nepotism. it’s all just rich guys giving their rich friends and their rich friends’ stupid fucking libertarian manchildren high paying jobs forever. that’s why they never go away, that’s why they always fail up, that’s why trans women and queer people can get bullied off the face of the internet for half-joking that a fictional woman who did a murder was blameless in her crimes while grifters who moonlight at raytheon can weather blow after blow and stir the pot and solicit donations they don’t need and never disappear no matter how hated they are, because they HAVE money and they HAVE security so none of this shit is a real threat to anything besides their shallow fucking egos. which, you know, to be fair, threatening a rich person’s ego is basically the same thing as killing a man in cold blood, so who can say what is wrong or right?

there’s obviously a lot of complicating factors to the anticapitalist yarn i’ve spun here, but that’s how i see it. the rich want to own culture, they commodify it through copyright and box it up and insist that we are trespassers if we try to reflect those “““properties”““ through ourselves. that is, in part, a big reason why i haven’t given up on godfeels or tried to “file the serial numbers off.” i love this story and i am treating it with as much care as i would something original, because i believe this is art that stands up even with its imperfections and it’s insulting to me that “fanwork” is considered naturally lesser than “original” work when literally everything around us that is owned by disney et al was stolen from what was once an open culture. i reject the enclosure of the commons of our imagination, and andrew hussie themself quite famously said that postcanon homestuck belongs to the most conscientious and invested members of the fandom.

and frankly, even as i wish i COULD make a living off of godfeels alone, i like that my art isn’t particularly monetizable. i like that it is considered low art. i like that many people see it as shameful or a waste of time. i do not want to create a commodity. i do not want to run a business. i do not want to be famous. i want to make art that is freely available that maybe, just maybe, can help a handful of queer people deal with the shit going on in their life and have a good time in the process.

in short: we have no choice but to revolutionize the world.

UHHHH wow that got off the rails at the end there didn’t it? i love giving writing advice hahaha!

#sarahposts #godfeels #homestuck #writing advice #how to write #how to collaborate #collab fic #art talk #failsons #us politics #communism is good #kill all landlords #make art #communist polemic #getting on my soapbox #capitalism is bad #fuck rich people #youll never guess which wretched homestuck community luminaries are failsons #everything is the same

[jessi4fanfics]

TROLLS HOLIDAY OF HAVOC: Part Two (also long lol)

AGAIN THIS IS LONG FOR TUMBLR FANFICS! Here's the link to it on Wattpad if you need it!

"But, what if she gets asked by a COMPLETE STRANGER to go to the dance?" Clay asked outloud. "Maybe I should ask her just so that doesn't happen."

"Then go ask her." John was still on the couch, just this time he had a sleeping mask over his eyes.

"Okay, you're right! I'll go ask her!" Clay stood up then stopped. "But what if I ask her and she thinks I like her?!! WHICHITOTALLYDON'TBECAUSETHATWOULDBEREALLYWEIRDIFIHAD ACRUSHONMYBESTFRIENDHEHEHEHE!!!" 

"Then don't ask her." John didn't move.

"Okay." Clay sat back down. "But, what if a random guy asks her, and she, being naive, says yes, the guy takes her, they dance, fall in love, decide to date, then he decides he doesn't want to date her cuz he's a jerk, dumps her, and breaks her sweet innocent little heart?!!"

"Then ask her," John grunted. 

"Alright." Clay stood up then stopped. "But what if--?"

"Oh my gosh!!!" John stood up and grabbed his younger brother by the shoulder. "Dude! You obviously want to ask her to the dance! You're just trying to make up lame excuses which you yourself don't even believe! Just go ask her and stop talking to me!!"

"You're right!" Clay took a deep breath in. "This is stupid. She's my best friend. I should just go ask her." He started to march, then stopped again. "But, what if--?"

John glared at him. "Bro, if you say one more word, I'm going to lock you out of the bunker."

Then he flopped back onto the couch, muttering about why he happened to be the one stuck with all these weirdos for brothers.

Clay sighed, then started toward the elevator. There he met Floyd.

"Hey, Floyd," he said, ignoring the 15 bags of groceries Floyd was trying to balance in his hands.

"MMHGDFF," Floyd said from behind the bag closest to him.

"Well, some greeting!" Clay was offended. "That's the last time I say 'Hey' to you!" And he stomped onto the elevator.

As it was going up, he heard a bunch of stuff fall and-- oof, was that glass?

"Darn itttt," came Floyd's voice. 

He must've dropped the groceries.

Clay winced but, deciding John had better stop being a lazy bum and get off the couch, ignored it.

Down below, Floyd sighed and bent down to pick up the glass from the jelly jar he had bought, along with a million other groceries.

"What was that?" Spruce came into view and saw what had happened. "Oh! Here, lemme help." He bent down to pick up the milk carton which had spilled everywhere.

"Thanks. That's the exact opposite of what Clay offered to do," Floyd said good-naturedly.

Bruce chuckled. As soon as they got the mess picked up, he helped him carry the groceries into the living room, where they dumped them on the coffee table in front of John.

"Hey!" John sat up. "You're in my space!"

"Oh, we're sorry, master!" Bruce did a fake bow. "Please accept our forgiveness." 

John gave him an exasperated sigh.

Floyd smiled. "Shouldn't you be off asking a girl to the dance or something?"

"What?" John lifted the eye mask a bit to stare at Floyd.

"He means begging a girl to go to the dance, sorry," Bruce smarted.

"Ha-ha. Very funny." John slapped his mask back on. "As a matter of fact, I could get any girl to go anywhere with me. But I don't get what the big deal is! I mean, Branch already said we didn't need to go, I don't know why everyone all of the sudden feels like we need to go now."

"Jeez, chill, we didn't pressure you, we just asked," Bruce said.

"Rudely," John told him.

Floyd eyed John for a bit. Then he grinned. "There's a girl you wanna ask, isn't there?"

John bolted up, his mask falling off. "Of course there is!! She's perfect, pretty green eyes, sweet soothing voice, but she'd never want to go with me."

"Why would you say that?" Bruce said sarcastically.

Floyd nudged him. He sat beside John. "The only way you'll ever know, John, is by asking her."

"But what if she says no?" John asked, biting the tips of his fingers anxiously. "It'll be the end of me. She'll gossip to all of her friends like what all teenage girls do and--"

"Wait, teenage?" Floyd held up a hand to stop him. "Okay, first: Not all teenage girls do that. And secondly, you want to ask a teenager to the dance?!"

John shrugged. "Yeah. Why not?"

"Why not? Cause you're almost 50, that's why not!!" Bruce spoke up.

"I am not almost fifty...I think." John tried to remember what his age was-- he had lost count. "The point isn't whether or not I'm too old for her, the point is whether or not she'd go to the dance with me. It's not like I'm asking her to marry me or anything."

"He's got a point," Floyd agreed. "It's just a dance."

"Yeah, but with him it's hard to tell what he might do," Bruce smirked.

John glared at him. 

"Ignore him," Floyd said. "John, if you really like her, you should go ahead and ask her."

John took a deep breath. "Okay. Maybe you're right. I'll go and try." He got up and began walking toward the elevator in the slowest way possible.

"Dude, are you okay?" Bruce asked.

"I...Seem...To...Be...Stuck...In...Slow...Motion," John said very slowly.

Floyd got up and pushed him to the elevator. "There. Now, please go, this is hurting to watch."

John sighed. "Welp, it was worth a shot." And he stepped onto the elevator. "But if I die out there-- burn my diary."

"Why?" Bruce said. "It's not like there's anything interesting in it."

John gaped at him. "Did you--?"

"And you're going up!" And Floyd moved the lever, and the elevator lifted.

                                                           ~~~ At Viva's Pod~~~

Viva sang as she folded her laundry next to Poppy. "This is super fun, Poppy. You know, back in Put-Put Village, we never did cool jobs like this! Folding laundry! Wow!"

Poppy raised an eyebrow at her and just smiled. "You're welcome to come over and do mine whenever you'd like, sis."

"Oooh, yes!! Sounds like so much fun!!" Viva squealed.

A knock came at the door.

"Come innnnnnn! Door is always open to anyone!!" Viva sang.

Clay stepped inside. "Hey, Viva. Can I-- uhh, talk to you for a second?"

"Hi, Clay! And sure! It's been awhile since I talked to you." Viva continued to sit and fold laundry, making no move to get up. "So, what'd you want to talk about? Sports? Desserts?" She gasped. "How amazing our siblings are?!!"

Poppy grinned and looked at Clay, realizing what he had meant. "Viva," she whispered, "I think he meant he wanted to talk alone with you."

"Huh?" Viva turned to her best friend, who raised his eyebrows expectantly at her. "Oop. Okay, just lemme fold one more sock-- wait, no, two more! Okay, now just let me fold this dress, then I'll be readyyyy...ooh ooh, can I also fold this shirt?! I haven't folded one yet, then I promise I'll be done. Well, I kinda promise...Oh! Look at this! Can I fold this and then talk to you?"

Clay groaned. This was gonna be a while.

                                                               ~~~Somewhere In Pop Village~~~

Branch had just finished with Poppy and his tuxedos about thirty minutes ago, but not really ready to return back to his chaotic brothers, he decided to take a short walk around Pop Village, maybe get a snack somewhere or something.

He thought about the dance and what Floyd had said. Did Poppy actually expect him to ask? She hadn't said anything about him taking her to the dance the entire time she had helped him with his tux.

He wondered that if he didn't ask her in time, then she might go with someone else! Not because she liked that person more or anything, but just because she was too friendly to lie and say someone had already asked her to go when he really hadn't!

Omigosh, were girlfriends always this confusing?!! As long as he lived, he would never be able to understand the female mind.

He sat down to overthink things even more at a hot dog stand's table, not because he wanted a hot dog but just because he wanted a place to sit down.

"Hotdog, mister?" someone asked him.

He didn't look up to see who. "No thank you."

That troll left, and he was finally able to think again...until thirty seconds later when another employee at the shop asked him again if he wanted a hot dog.

He politely refused again without looking up.

That troll left and lastly. a girl came up to him and patted him on the shoulder. 

"Umm, excuse me? Mister?"

He looked up at her, sighing. "I don't want a hotdog, okay?!"

The girl looked confused. "Uhm...okay? I wasn't implying that you did."

"Oh. Oops, sorry, I just..." Branch flushed. The girl looked to be around sixteen, maybe seventeen, and she seemed to be shaken from his outburst. 

Then, she gave a gasp and giggled, then gave a little dance. "Oh my gosh, are you Branch from BroZone?!!" she shrieked.

"Shhh!" That was always his instinct whenever someone recognized him. Last time everyone in the area found out that someone from BroZone was in the area, he almost drowned to death from an ocean of fans. "Yes, I--I am."

"Eeek!" she squealed. "My name is Hazel, can I please have your autograph?!" She ripped an autograph book and a pen from her hair.

"Sure." He gave her a smile which made her blush. And as he took her autograph book, she began to gab like crazy.

"I always listen to every one of your guys' albums, but last week, when you're newest one came out, I wasn't able to get it because my mom said I hadn't done enough of my chores to earn it, but I was all like, 'Mom! I have a job, I can decide what I get to spend my money on!' and my dad said that I shouldn't fall in love with people I haven't even met before and I told him that I wasn't technically in love with any of you, I just really really really adore all of you, though if I was in love with one of you, it'd probably be you, hahahaha, but that's just if, it's not like I'm actually in love with you or want to marry you or anything!!" She was laughing and fangirling like crazy.

Branch just continued to smile at her, something he had learned, ever since rejoining BroZone, was helpful, especially if you weren't really listening and just wanted to pretend like you were, like he was doing now.

Maybe if I ask Poppy in a casual way, that way she knows I'm planning on going with her and I won't have to worry about it after that.

He handed Hazel's autograph book and pen back to her. "There you are. It was really nice to meet you."

Branch was about to get up and leave-- it was obvious this hotdog place was a bad place to try to think-- when Hazel touched his arm.

"Umm. Heheh, can I ask you a really big favor?" Hazel asked softly.

"Uhh, sure?" Branch didn't know what that was supposed to mean.

"Well," Hazel fidgeted with her fingers, "I know this boy who is gonna ask me to the dinner and the dance, and--"

"Gonna?" Branch lifted an eyebrow. "He hasn't asked you yet?"

"No." She shook her head. "But I know he's going to because he's been staring at me all week, and all the kids in my grade are saying he wants to and has this huge crush on me, which would be so cool if he did, no boy has ever liked me before, it's just taken him a while because he's shy. But he's probably going to ask me later today or tomorrow, I know it!" 

"Oh..." Branch wasn't sure how accurate this "grade gossip" was going to be, but for her sake, he hoped it would end well. "What is it you wanted me to do for you?"

"I've never been to a dance before!" Hazel blurted.

"Oh, that's alright."

"I mean, I don't know how to do it! In the slow romantic style." Her face turned red.

Branch's did as well. "Are you--are you asking me to teach you how to dance?"

"Not just that. I've never been out to dinner with anyone either."

"It's just like eating dinner with your family," Branch shrugged. As soon as he said that, he knew it wasn't true. He ate completely different with his brothers than he did near Poppy.

"That's a lie." Hazel wasn't dumb. He admired that.

"So, you want me to teach you to dance...and to take you out to dinner so you can practice eating out?" Branch thought this was a complete waste of time. "Wouldn't that make you less hungry when he actually takes you out?"

"He's always an hour late to everything, so we'd have plenty of time to practice!" Hazel encouraged. "And it doesn't have to be a meal, just a light snack for practice. I also want to practice talking."

"Talking?"

"Yeah. How do you act on the first date? Do you flirt like crazy, or do you stay shy and quiet and just enjoy the time you have?"

Branch did not feel like he was the one to answer these questions. She should've seen him at his first date with Poppy! He was a complete wreck!

"And why are you asking me to do this instead of someone...ya know, closer to you?" he asked.

"Because...you're super cool! Why else?!" She beamed at him.

"Look, Hazel," he sighed. "You seem really sweet."

"Aww, thanks!"

"And sound pretty smart for your age." 

"Thanksssss😊."

"But I have a girlfriend."

"I know."

Whoa. That was unexpected. Not the fact that she knew, everyone knew he and Poppy were dating, but the way she just seemed to push the fact aside.

"Don't you think I'd rather spend the night with my girlfriend instead of--" ooh, that was the wrong approach.

Hazel didn't seem offended, thank goodness. "Of course! It's only the first hour, though. You can dance with her afterward."

"But, I--" Branch had no words. He looked at her, her face pleading, begging her to do this simple simple thing.

What would Poppy think?

She wouldn't care. Honestly. But could he get himself to tell her?

"Okay. Fine. Sure." 

What was he saying?!

"What time and where should I meet you?"

Stop, stop!! This is the biggest mistake of your life! 

"And hour before the dance starts. No, maybe half an hour. Yeah, and how about right here?!" Hazel suggested.

"That's fine."

Oh my gosh, Branch, you are insane.

"Great!!" Hazel jumped on him and gave him a huge hug. "I knew you were as sweet as the fans say you are!" And she skipped away, triumphantly.

Branch stood there, watching her, wondering what in the world had just happened.

Another employee came up to him. "Sir, do you want a hotdog?"

Branch gave a groan.

                                                               ~~~ At Viva's Pod~~~

They were in Viva's closet. Why, Clay had no idea.

"Is this secret enough?" Viva giggled mischeviously.

"What?"

"You said you wanted to talk to me privately."

"Well, yeah, but that doesn't mean it has to be a secret." 

"Oh. Darn it." Viva looked disappointed. 

Clay rolled his eyes. "Viva, I wanted to ask you something very important. So maybe you should calm down and be a little serious for a bit."

Viva laughed. "Oh, Clay. You're cute when you talk like that." She patted his shoulder.

He knew she was joking, and it still annoyed him, but he blushed a bit. "Viva, I'm your best friend."

"I know that." She gave him a cute smile.

Suddenly, it was hard for Clay to continue. He was suddenly sweating a lot. Like, a lot a lot. 

"Well, I uhhhh...as your best friend, I want to make sure that you, you uhm...you don't get into trouble."

"You think I'm gonna get into trouble?" Viva raised an eyebrow.

"No! That's not what I meant!"

Get a hold of yourself, Clay.

"What I meant was, as your friend, I don't want anything dangerous happening to you. So I have decided it is my sacred duty, as your friend, to ask you to--" at the last words he faultered.

"As me toooooooo---?" Viva urged, smiling.

"Ask you...I wanted to ask you..." He took a deep breath. "Viva, I would love it if you went to the dance with me."

There! He had said it!

Viva smile grew bigger. "Aww. Clay...that's so sweet of you. And I would totally love to go with you!!"

"Wait, really?!!" After all of that, Clay hadn't really expected her to say yes. Not truly.

"Of course. You're my best friend. But-- the thing is..." she began to fidget now.

"The thing is what?" Oh no, please don't say something terrible.

"I already said yes to Floyd when he asked me."

Clay stared at her. He probably stared at her for thirty seconds straight. 

And, Viva was sure that, once he was done staring, the whole Pop Village heard him scream, "WHAT?!!!!?!?!??!"

#broppy #branch trolls #trolls 3 #brozone #trolls band together #wattpad fanfiction #trolls bruce #trolls clay #trolls viva #fanfic #really long

[bcbdrums]

Was Kigo always a controversial ship in the fandom? Or is the controversy fairly recent? Is Shego really on her mid twenties?

it has always been controversial. as stated in my previous posts, it's so controversial in fact that depending on who you talk to it can be toxic on both sides. I have friends who have been so attacked, they won't post/reblog certain things for fear of the wrath of the kigo shippers... i have friends who won't reblog this post on the off-chance it could enrage some of them.

kigo shippers control the KP wiki, they edit articles to make it sound like kigo is canon, and they edit articles to hate on Ron and make him seem like the worst possible person to ship with Kim. others who try to edit the wiki to be strictly factual find themselves eventually blocked and their edits removed, and kigo opinions returned.

on the flip side, I've seen kim/ron shippers here on Tumblr viciously attack kigo shippers. and in at least one instance when I tried to help out a kigo person just by saying "ignore the trolls and eventually they'll go away," I got attacked by that person for not outright supporting them and called homophobic because I don't ship it too. apparently my saying they have a right to ship peacefully wasn't enough; they demand you also ship their ship, which is not fair. seen the same toxicity with johnlock... you can't even be neutral. if you're not with them, you're against them and must be destroyed, in their view. at least, that's the reputation certain people have created for that entire side of the fandom (johnlock and kigo... sorry i'm still salty about mid0nz getting bullied offline.)

thus, I have learned my lesson and I try to stay out of any ship war when I see it. I gave up on the wiki years ago and I don't get involved except to say "don't like, don't read" and DNI with trolls and ppl who behave in a toxic way.

however, yes. Shego is CLEARLY an adult. which makes kigo a ship between an adult and a minor, which is not okay. and making Kim "legal" just doesn't work for me, morally. it's kind of sickening to me that people think a birthday going from 17 to 18 suddenly makes something okay. but that's just me.

that's one of the things I LOVE about the live action movie. it clearly showed that Shego is VERY much an adult. and Kim is very much a teenager. my friends and I talk about how the reason we think a lot of people hate on the movie so much is because it destroys kigo by revealing the ship as inappropriate. I don't want to assume a person is pedo, but...if you know Kim is a literal child and you still ship it...there's a serious problem there.

I saw a comment on someone else's blog recently that claimed Shego is "minor-coded" and a friend and I were just...astonished at this claim. she is 100% NOT and it is very much the opposite in fact, and we want that person to bring up their proofs because...no. the show plainly and repeatedly shows Shego as an ADULT. personally I think mid-late twenties based on canon and real-world evidence, and I've made many posts about that but I'll be posting about it again in the near future.

all in all... I still say. "don't like, don't read." if you feel like you need to go on a crusade to destroy another person's ship, leave me out of it. let everyone ship their ships in peace. they're gonna ship it whether anyone likes it or not, so please just let fandom be peaceful.

that's one of the things I love about the drakgo fandom... we all have different opinions about the age gap, about when they get together, about whether they remain evil or turn good... yes there is lots of headcanon crossover but there's also massive headcanon divergence. and yet we all exist peacefully and happily together. and if we don't like, we don't read. plain and simple.

so once again, for the umpteenth time... let people ship their ships in peace. don't get angry if someone else doesn't ship your ship. just ship and let ship and DNI if it bothers you, and don't be a troll.

#queued post #kim possible #shego #ask answer #drakken

[lemuel-apologist]

hey I’m a queerstake blogger and someone has sent me a weird ask with the following text

“Hey have you seen the posts by lemuel-apologist about her friend r4cs0? Super weird exmormon drama going on. Apparently she used to jump hump for him back at BYU, and now that he has become a popular figure for right-wingers here on tumblr she is trying to "out" him for not obeying "tHe CoMmAnDmEnTs" as closely as he claims. But several people have clapped back at her by pointing out that she spreads a lot of misinformation about the "mormon bigfoot" conspiracy theory. SMH”

It sounds like someone is trying to stir up drama and slander you. I doubt I’m the only one who’s received this ask. I got it a few hours ago if that helps. Thought you should know!

Oh my god, I wish this whole campaign would just DIE ALREADY. I've been sent asks across blogs along the same lines, one of which invoked an actual woman's suicide, and at this point I'm just fucking done. My head hurts too much for this shit. Any claims made in any ask in the style above about me or about my other blogs are most likely laughably false (the only reasons I go to BYU anymore are for science events and museums, and there's no conspiracy, just an odd doctrinal theory).

This isn't anything against you, Anon (or anyone reading this or looking for answers or anything). This has been going on for so goddamn long that I just started deleting the asks because I can't be assed to feed the trolls anymore. I can't be assed to be anything more than annoyed, either (my head is killing me. I should really go get my sunglasses).

This is just a weird campaign that I got dragged into because I told people to stop sending Mormons and ex-Mormons weird bait asks about r4cs0. I don't know what the hell is going on anymore and I am so sleepy, so this is the end of the post, goodbye.

#checking the mail

[hotgirlmuseboardxo]

hey girl! How was the week?

omg hi!! lets do life updates:

i have a feral troll in my soul telling me i need to quit my job or it will explode HAHAHA like i deadass feel like i'm on the titanic bc the ship is sinking and i been trying 2 save it but i just can't do it anymore. i have a meeting w/ my boss tmrw (he's notorious for cancelling these things tho), he was supposed to get me info about updating my contract in august but "forgot" (also notorious for this 😭 ). i just messaged our old editor in chief to be like "girl are these ppl doing anything illegal to me" lmaooooo bc if they are i WILL be going elle woods mode on that man ! i have outgrown my role there it's like trying to fit a size five shoe on a size nine foot baby 🤥

going to toronto 2 see my besties for my bday in feb WOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO (something magic will happen here i sense)

i did not hangout w/ a single person in november (the vibes were rancid, god was protecting me) but i had a v candid conversation w/ one of my oldest gfs about how i felt like our relationship was struggling and wanting to improve it so we've been doing that and it's been so slay <3. we met working at h&m in 2016 lol now she's a wife and mutha and homeowner and i'm single w/ two cats and a boujee lil girl cave. iconique! we went shopping + got yummy pizza last night and on saturday i'm going to her place to celebrate her bday (i got her rare beauty cream blush, highly recommend xoxo) with another friend!!

i'm still going live on tumblr everydayyy, honestly my goal is just to help educate u cuties on emotional intelligence and taking back your power through understanding your energy !!! and answer any other q's u have about makeup/fashion/pop culture, whatever!! it's v fun ur all invited to come hang w/ me 🥰

i have a bunch of new clothes coming for christmas and i'm v excited to play dress-up + take pics for you guys. also excited to give gifts !! going to do a birth chart reading for each of my parents + got my dad a new keurig and madre some skin care

i'm like sooooo happy w/ how my body looks but my scorpionic ass can never be stagnant lol so in the new year i'm gonna do more arms n abs stuff, also always trying to make my ass fatter haahahhaa

life is fun! always :) so glad u r here living it with me besties xoxo

#i hope u had a good week!!! it's snowing here rn again hehe #answered

[lovehael]

Get to know me~ lovehael aka @angelfeed aka Leah❣️

Tagged by @pinkmoondoll9shihtzu

Last song:

Last show: Flipper with Fletcher Shears doing vocals :3

Currently watching: Chainsaw Man, Urusei Yatsura, Excel Saga, Magic User's Club, Mononoke, Avenue 5... Then a friend recommended Link Click, which I'm gonna start soon. Pretty much watching 1-2 episodes of several series at any time, some first time viewings n some rewatches. When I'm in full escapism mode, having something marathoning in the background like Dark Shadows, Golden Girls, Star Trek TNG + DS9

Currently reading: Mai the Psychic Girl. Found a complete set at Half Price Books so I'm happy to just focus on finishing that :D Reading manga at bedtime has been helpful to get sleepy while also motivating me to draw more.

Current obsession: 2020 I got super into Machine Girl n that interest is still strong, but this year I got really into The Garden. And now I'm about to see them play together n_n What else hmm... Always having walnut milk chocolate on hand, refreshing lemonades n orange juice. Probably Tumblr cause I'm way more active here since Covid times

Tagging: Just gonna go ahead and tag mutuals I notice in my notifications recently- @ice--ocean @mary-of-silence @sisterreisaid @waveringheart @evidenceofabsence @8zu @troll-star @capacity @enginue @helllnotes @mr-top-secret @allyouneedismud @ermor @lemonscentedpapercut @brkfst @n-award @toadchavay @voluspo @eyes-like-a-pisces @cardcaptor-datura @sewercentipede @galacticgothsquid @dixiedeadshake @wiztress @lake-lady @suturesque @bonewhiteglory

#adding more people to the tags still cause i wanna tag everyone #kuroyuri shimai #🩷