#I'm just trying so hard to be careful but it's like...... I just forget

[strangeeditsbylr]

How Eddie could possibly tie into Mike's story in season 5.

I'm gonna say it right away, it would make the most sense for Mike to be a target of Vecna in season 5. It would be a natural way to explain why he does certain things (such as why he was a jerk in s3 onwards) why he feels the need to pretend to love El and his feelings towards Will, it would just make sense.

I think the bts photos of s5 but Mike and Dustin specifically are really important here. Before Eddie died, Mike had his hair grown out in the same style as Eddie's hair and Dustin seemed in the process of growing his hair. In season 5, Dustin let his hair grow out and he styled it like Eddie, probably as a way to honor him or as a way to cope with the loss. Mike on the other hand, cut his hair, which could signify him trying to repress his grief, it could be a nod towards the fact that he just wants to forget Eddie because of how painful the loss is.

One thing you have to understand about Mike and Eddie's friendship is that it's extremely likely that Eddie came into Mike's life when Mike really needed it, I think a lot of people don't stop and think about what Mike must've felt between season 3 and season 4. Think about this, his best friend (and presumably the person he's in love with and likely still feels guilty about hurting) left for the first time in almost 10 years. They've never had to live without each other. His girlfriend left too which I don't think it matters if Mike's feeling for El are platonic or not (even though they are) but having a person who you do care about leave is hard nonetheless. Max started becoming distant which in turn made Lucas more distant, until finally it was just Mike and Dustin. Can you imagine how horrible that would be? He lost almost everyone he cares about in just a few months. Eddie, I imagine, was his escape from all that, Eddie was a massive influence on Mike, everything from his hairstyle to his hobbies (the guitar in Mike's room, also Eddie bringing back his passion for DND) Eddie was his escape from reality, Eddie was one of the only people he had left.

Now imagine you had a person like that in your life, a person who came to you when you most needed them, a person you felt like yourself again when you were around, and imagine you left for a week and when you returned that person was dead. Mike has nothing left to escape, he can't go to Eddie to handle his grief anymore so now he just tries to strip himself of anything that makes him think about Eddie, he doesn't know how to process his grief so he just simply doesn't, he bottles it up.

That's exactly what vecna wants, like Max for example tried to bury her grief when Billy died and it made her a target.

Vecna is going to use Eddie against Mike, I just know it.

#mike wheeler #mike wheeler theory #byler #byler endgame #mikewheeler #stranger things theory #byler theory

[gaylordscooter]

Log of the Multiverse: Cross and XChara

Cross and XChara (usually referred to as just "Chara") both hail from Xtale, an au that's fallen into ruin ever since the creator, XGaster, was contained.

I was shocked to find out that the creator was one of the characters in their universe, but Ink told me he was a false creator, as he was merely a puppet to the true creator that lies beyond our realm and comprehension. It's like how a meta character in a piece of fiction can be written to act "aware", but it's still being written by somebody. Ain't that weird?

Don't think about that for too long.

So Xtale was kinda an empty void after XGaster was taken care of—that's the fault of Cross who killed like, all of his friends (but xpapyrus was the one who killed basically everyone else. GEEZ i couldn't imagine my brother killing a fly! hurting a fly definitely. but killing?? yeesh) and then absorbed xfrisk's soul because he thought he'd be able to OVERWRITE (<- a mechanic their world has where you can basically do whatever the hell you want, or something) his world turned out he couldn't do that sooo.

yeah he was NOT happy about losing his world (and somewhat playing a part in its downfall)

and also xchara's linked to frisk's soul for some reason. so he kinda just had xchara haunting him for awhile.

Luckily! Ink, Dream and I were able to help Cross cope through his loss!

It took so much time. like so much.

He eventually came to accept his world would never come back, but he got an idea. Since his universe couldn't be repaired to what it was before, why not create something new? Of course he couldn't create new people but after learning there were more people that have lost their homes like him (and me) he thought: why not make this place a safe haven for people like him?

Ink encouraged him. He was Very enthusiastic about it actually, he even helped with decorating the place (as in he painted every building. and all the scenery).

Of course, Cross isn't like Dream and Ink, who can sense negativity or when someone's world is destroyed, so those two tend to give him a heads up on where to go (or they just drop people off themselves)

At first we've just been calling it "Xtale" but obviously the place has changed drastically so we decided to call it something else.

unfortunately somehow all of us (even the ARTIST) weren't able to come up with that creative of a name and settled for calling it "the hub"

Now, I didn't forget about XChara, they were getting tired of having to haunt Cross all the time, so I decided to take up a little project.

And by me, I mean I asked Alphys (from a post-pacifist undertale au, we're buddies. yes i'm allowed to be friends with her because they're no longer following the game's script) to help me make a robot body. i made a prototype that ended up being completely non-functional. so alphys kindly made a complete one that WAS functional for me. even though i insisted she didn't need to do that but she said she enjoyed doing it and that i would've popped blood vessels i didn't have if i kept trying to make one (she's right. i was never that big of an engineer)

so the hard part was separating cross and chara. except it WASNT because their souls are WEIRD and i literally just wrenched their pieces apart like lego pieces it was crazy. unfortunately they still only have half of each of their souls. but hey, they can live just fine like that! they're just not as strong as they would be.

well, mainly in cross's case. chara has a cool robot body now that's loaded with defense.

So anyway, yeah! That's about it.

Pretty happy outcome for these guys, despite all the hardships of course.

But I heard from Ink, in this other multiverse this thing called the "X-Event" occurs. It sounded pretty rough from what I remember. But fortunately our Ink isn't like the one in that multiverse! He's too much of a softy

#blue's (totally not diary) log

[manda-kat]

Actually, I'm not finished.

A lot of people (especially in online friendships) who struggle with their mental health put an overwhelming amount of pressure on their friends, even if they've only been speaking for a few months.

It's always some kind of 'I have this issue, but I'm working on it, so don't worry' until you don't message them back quick enough and they send you a lecture about how you must hate them and they're a terrible person and if you don't want to talk, you should just go.

You stop being their friend and turn into their source of encouragement and validation. They post depracating things about themselves so you'll tell them they're wrong. Every day. Every conversation. Something needs your attention constantly. And I mean constantly. If you leave them on read for too long, they dissolve and you're messaging them for hours trying to talk them off the ledge.

And what can you do? They don't do this maliciously. Most of the time they have a legitimate condition and their reactions are fueled by things outside of their control. And you love them. They're your friend. You want to help, but you have no idea how.

You can't say anything. Even gentle boundaries cause them to spiral. 'I'm at work on these days, so I won't reply until I get home' is met with 'I'm so sorry, I'm a terrible and needy person. If you want to leave, just go ahead. I don't want you to feel pressured to reply. I'm a horrible friend.' Telling them that their reactions are genuinely upsetting is worse. They accuse you of not caring about their disorder and it doesn't take much for them to tell you how close they are to killing themselves. They never say it directly, but it feels like they're blaming you. You shouldn't have said anything. You apologize, comfort them, beg them to stay, talk for hours to keep them calm and tell yourself never to be honest again.

You can't talk to your friend. Most topics are taboo. You can't have any negative feedback and if you even use different puncuation than usual they begin to accuse you of hating them. They start urging you to be honest, saying they know you must be annoyed and angry at them. And honestly? At this point they're right. You feel like a monster. They're so vulnerable and in such a terrible spot and you've let them think you hate them. No matter how much you try to bend around them, they can sense that you left the friendship weeks ago.

Things boil over. Every conversation is them challenging you to leave. Daring you. Almost begging you. They test you at every chance. You wonder if they actually hate you and want you to go. They've stopped sending extra messages when you don't reply. You stop messaging first and hope they forget about you. Maybe they do. Time goes by and you realize you haven't spoken in several months.

Whenever you think of them, you don't remember the jokes or the songs you shared or the movies you gushed over together. You remember bending over backwards and struggling to say just the right thing all the time. Why don't you miss them? You're an awful friend. They were in so much pain. It was all your fault. You should have tried harder. They never said anything mean to you, only themselves. They had such a hard life. You wonder if they're doing any better now. You wonder if you had stayed maybe they would have gotten out of that rough patch and become your friend again. You wonder if they ever went through with all those threats...

I'm just begging anyone who reads this to think about it next time they're about to send a message that resembles one of my examples here. Don't send it. Take a walk. Draw a picture. Watch an episode of TV. Eat. Take a shower. Do something- anything. Then go back and ask yourself- do you really want to say that? If you already know you have the 'sabotages every relationship' disorder, then maybe ask yourself beforehand if a certain message might be self-sabotaging. Before sending messages, type them in your notes app and ask if they sound reasonable. Idk. All I know is some things can't be unsent.

#long post #rant #negative

[shimmerluna]

it’s really shitty that his parents get so upset when Charlie’s literally just trying to be a good boyfriend :/

#shimmer's thoughts #heartstopper #charlie spring #jane spring #i'm not going to bring julio into this #’i wanted to comfort my boyfriend with his shitty home/school situation’ 'yeah? go fuck yourself!' #like girl. relax #he's not even going just to mess around. it's literally because he wants to be there for him #yeah he broke your rules but in the nicest way possible. at least hear him out maybe? #i feel like they don't see how sweet and good-hearted Charlie is. and how hard he's trying #because they don't care to pay attention. and it doesn't feel fair to Charlie #maybe i'm just traumatized but at the same time i think adults forget to treat children like people sometimes. so.

[selvepnea]

Thinking about. That one post about art. And how it's never good enough. Since you're the one that made it. And how. It might relate to how I view myself?

#Sel talks #Like. Do I like the idea of a masculine body because I think it will make me less me? #I keep thinking about a line from “in stars and time” talking about. How maybe they changed because it was easier than learning to love #Himself as he was. #Keep thinking about something my therapist said last session. About how he would hope there's more restriction around accessing trans #Health-care than there is about getting a medical Marijuana card #And even if it comes from a place of good intent; is still a harmful idea? #I keep forgetting how much importance cis people put on transitioning. And it's just. Not? For me? #My body is just another form of expression for me to form and play with. And I feel like it might be hard to try and get someone who's #Not thought a lot about gender to understand. #I don't really want to lable it as “transitioning” either. My isat brainrot is wanting me to call it “Changing”; bit I'm not sure if that's #Quite accurate either. Like. We don't have a word for playing with different styles of clothes? Why do I need one for messing w other types #Of presentation? #Sigh... #I'm soooo tempted to just go on t and not do anything else. No name change. No sex change. And not tell anyone. #Why do I need to take into consideration how much my decision weighs on other people? #I feel like I've gotten too many reminders that “tomorrow's not promised” or “How we spend our days is how we spend our lives” #“Don't live wondering” or whatever that old lesbian slogan was. “We're all going to die so who cares if it's a waste”? Some will wood song #I'm listening to. I just. #Why am I waiting for the perfect opertunity to transition? Or change or whatever. #I've always considered my want to masculinise as me taking “be the change you want to see” either too far or too literally #I want to see men in dresses!! And if no one else around here is going to do it I guess that falls on me! #Why must I follow everyone else's path to t?? I want to make my own! #Grrr barkbark #I feel so underequiped to change the world; why must I do it?? Can't it just change for me??

[candlebel]

I cared. I still do. I still think of you and I still cry over you. You were importat to me. You still are.

#I was interested. I wanted to get to know you. #I did not want validation. I only said it because you said it... I don't know why. I was susceptible. #I was blindly accepting certain things that you said about me. Judgement that you had for me. #I was under severe stress from my job at the time; while at the same time dealing with unresolved emotional trauma and very low self worth. #I was burnt out. Crushed... Completely. #I didn't want attention. I did not want you to cure my depression. I though I was just letting you know me. I wasn't aware I was oversharin #I tried... SO HARD to get over the things that triggered me and hurt me but I just couldn't... #I wanted to. I did everything in my might; I took it to therapy; I looked everywhere within me; to either get over it #or completely forget about you and stop caring at all; so things were ok and normal again; but it didn't go away... #to this day... #I just feel so... unsafe... at the idea of talking again #I know I wasn't the best listener and I profoundly regret that. #I was not only thinking about myself like you said and I was aware of the effort that other's put; but I was afraid/resistant to PRECISELY #that cause of past events with other people. Because in some I was the one putting that effort and ended badly for me. Looking back #that was inappropiate of you because you felt too comfortable generalizing my past relationships and why in your head they failed. #“I cant help but feel you are looking down on people who” Stay away from me if you ever make a stretch like this again. #By “experiment” I meant that you don't know how a relatioship with somebody is gonna turn out until you go and try. That's all I meant. #I didn't want things to turn out this way. I'm sorry they did. #The effort I put for you may have been shit to you. But to me it was a lot. And I'm done taking judgement. #Altho I love my friends I still keep distance. I still can't completely help that. I can go months not talking to my BF. #You were my BF during my teenage years. I remembered you fondly. I still do. #I don't feel ready to talk again having to keep to myself interest that I might have. Related to trauma. I do not feel comfortable with tha #No I do not look at your blogs. #The day I said I was abused I had a panic attack right after that. That's mainly why I had to cut contact: I didn't want another one. #I didn't tell you because I didn't trust you to not say “talk to the void” again. I didn't trust you to want to hear about it. I didnt feel #safe with you anymore. Event tho we ressumed contact I felt that way the entire time. #I wanted to answer all the questions you had; I really did; until I couldn't stand it anymore. #And the day I removed you from discord... I know you probably had an awful day that day... I'm so; so sorry... #I'd like to one day be completely unbothered by assumptions and stuff cuz I know it's not your fault... You went through stuff too... #vent

[dredshirtroberts]

okay. i cleared out the space under my bed so the princess will have so much MORE room for activities than she previously did. at least until Saturday and we move to the new place and she can decide if she's going to play nice with the boys finally.

#i was really underutilizing the under the bed space #not that i had a lot that could go in there but like just conceptually there was a lot of open space #also a whole fuckin pillow for some reason #anyway... my bookshelf STILL has books on it 3 bankers boxes later #i have a BAJILLION chotchkies i gotta figure out how to transport (absolutely already have gotten rid of things that aren't important) #(still have approximately a bajillion don't at me bro i know) #we're gonna figure out the stuffy transport situation #i'm planning on just throwing my clothes into the back of my car wherever there's space when we get to that part #because fuck it i don't care if it's enclosed in something if it gets dirty there's a washer and dryer in the new place #and i've already got plans to wash so much clothing #i have a whole ass hangup about laundry and i'm going to do my best to overcome that this next year #i'm also trying really hard not to overspend on spoons because i want to be able to help AND enjoy my birthday activities #(weather permitting) on friday AND also be kind of useful while we're settling into the new place over the next week #it is very nice that i do not have to do everything all by myself because i've been able to take the rest breaks i need #i'm doing very good at not panicking i'm really hoping it'll last until we're most of the way done already and i can just #point to all the things that are already done and go ''eh it's fine see?'' at myself #and then not actually panic. #we'll see how that goes lmao #okay lunch time i gotta get up and do that before i forget i preheated the oven

[trulyiamjusthangingout]

Sebastian Vael is such a profoundly lonely character

#like some of this is just the limitations of the DLC and I do get that but like #accepting the material as presented (tho acknowledging it's told through Varric's very biased POV) #Seb tries SO HARD to connect with the Kirkwall Crew #(with the exception of Anders who he's still shockingly polite to all things considered) #yet his attempts at reaching out for friendship are either outright rejected (Aveline...VARRIC especially) #or at best politely accepted without much depth in return...Like he can be a friendly acquaintance to them but not a truly close friend #(his relationships with Merrill and Fenris for example) #and again it is not for lack of trying on his part! man is using all of the tools he has to connect with these ppl! #and he himself clearly cares about them!! #just something about this guy who was outright rejected by his family for being too much #too hedonistic too emotional too impulsive #and sent away from the only home he's ever known to a city where he knows truly no one #and has to cut off as much of his former personality/behavior as possible to try #and earn redemption/righteousness be what his family wants #the way he has to constantly earn Elthina's approval but it never stays nothing he does is ever truly good enough #and how other than her and Hawke (presuming they actually take the time to get to know him which like..a lot of players don't) #he never truly knows anyone in Kirkwallhe's always a stranger in that city #i forget what my point was but I love Sebastian he makes me so fucking sad #yes I'm playing DA2 again it's fine i don't have a problem i can stop whenever i want mind your business lol #dragon age #sebastian vael #dragon age 2

[astrxealis]

good morning ^___^

#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚ #i'll work on my homework for the coming week raghh only a bit left and then the next week after this next one #is the second to the last week but also most tasks are due then so hip hip hooray but also noooo #anyway my point is i'm stressed at the idea of more homework ... most of them are group projects so i'm kinda chill though #mostly just worried about doing my parts so i get good scores in yk. peer evals and shit. uhh and the indiv ones ew #i have time to work on that one the whole of next week but i'll try to finish the other three by this weekend #and then during the week wnvr i get new tasks i'll do them asap #but fuck projects lol i hate getting more homework come on #anyway i'll also try not to be harsh on myself for just getting a simple One mistake ..... this is a big problem with me it really sucks #but yeah that's it. sorry for rambling about me with school AKSBJDBAJD ANYWAY i dmed a bit w a good friend yesterday and #THEY ARE BACK INTO GBF AND FE3H LET'S FUCKING GOOO what a coincidence those are my favs at the very moment #+ xv hehe. anyway. YEAH like. so yeah. and then bestie but the wifi stopped working at night so i left her NOOO then played xv tho so ok #okay that's all i'm tired of typing HIII HAVE A GOOD DAY NOON EVE EVERYONE !! #don't forget you're important. for a lot of reasons but if you need one atm then it's you're important to me AYEEE <3 but fr yes #and then... take care of yourself! even if it's hard just the little things help and then you feel really good afterwards :] 💗✨ you got this

[sensazioneultra]

.

#having bpd is all fun and games until... #well no it's never fun and games #but my point was #i truly truly truly hate not being able to believe ppl care about me #like you can tell me 3000 times i won't believe you i can barely believe my mum loves me (she does i'm like mostly sure of it) #(at least when it's not a super bad day or when she doesn't forget my bday) #anyway like... idk. i just don't get why anyone would care about me #i don't even care about me #yeah it's a very bad self loathing time lately like worse than usual #and i try telling myself what i feel isn't a reflection of reality #but god!!!!! i don't have a therapist telling me that over n over n over i haven't had one for so long #and me telling myself really doesn't work #i mock myself when i tell myself things like 'maybe they don't hate you?' #i TRY not to like genuinely. i tell myself to STOP BEING MEAN #but i just get bombarded with mean (to myself) thoughts all day so it's really hard to fight them all #i barely fight 6% of them #sorry idk where i'm going w this i rly need therapy but i don't trust therapists and the likes anymore so . mh #it's weird cause i don't feel ppl around me understand my bpd n all related issues #and yeah i don't talk abt it so okay my fault but it's also #idk i'm scared to talk abt it bc i sound insane. i am insane. and the only person who i can confide my insane thoughts to is myself #everyone else would just hate me judge me be disgusted be repulsed find me weird etc etc #i used to have more friends w bpd btw #it never ended too well LMAOOOO but i do sometimes miss it #cause while yeah we were fucked up n i was honesty doing terribly and now i'm better (doesn't feel like it rn but #i am) #i kinda felt more... free to be myself including the bad and the ugly? does that make sense #it's actually insane how much i repress nowadays like especially irl but not only.. i just PUSH PUSH PUSH everything down so ppl don't see #just how badly my mind works i pretenddddd aaaaall day long it's exhausting #you know i just... kinda wanna scream and spill my guts figurative and literally sometimes. just. let it all out #until i am but a shell an empty container and i can maybe be at peace

[imwritesometimes]

trying to look on the positive side! I got some more soup delivered today! so at least I will have nice warm soup for dinner!

#and lots of stuff for thanksgiving so I mean... at least that's like... taken care of. mostly. #and I didn't have to worry about trying to fit going to the store into... everything else going on rn #chicken and rice soup my beloved. with an english muffin. forget it it's perfect. didn't have to GO to the store. less stress. #I'm phoning it in so hard when this is all eventually over like lmao I might not even wrap the Christmas presents. #just throw em at everyone. here's ur shit. that's all of it cause I'm super broke now. #erin explains it all

[majormeilani]

just. every time i remember anything bad i've done (even if it was when i didn't know better cuz i was like a kid or whatever) i just think "you're just like them aren't you. a horrible person just like them."

#and maybe i do try too hard to see good in others when it really isn't there #but i'm like. i want there to be good in the world #i want to be better than i once was #and i'm trying hard every day to do that #but i hate having regrets i can't change #of pain i can't undo #i never wanted to hurt anyone #it just seems things turned out that way #and i feel so much remorse for it #because i can't take it back. i can't make it better #and even though i try i can't move on #how??? how do people just not care??? #how do people move on #how do people forget to hurt.

[dream-launch]

I better get a girlfriend at uni or what's the point

#the fact ive lived this long to be the only person i know personally who hasnt even had their first kiss yet #it's pathetic #because i do try #however i do not knwo how to flirt #fuck i dont even know hwo to talk to new people let alone flirt with them #its the clear mental illness that never got sorted cause my mum refused to let me see a doctor as a kid #cause she was scared id end up as mentally ill as my brother #which dude has an impressive list of issues #except it just means i have a full on breakdown and cant speak irl for a week if i have to make one phonecall #and breakdown crying when i find out somewhere cares at all about me #however i aint going to the doctor nwo abour my mental health consider how often i have to go jsut about my physical health #im at that point tho wher its liek im too old to have literally zero experience in anyone even liking ke #liek i dont think im ugly i think im actually quite pretty #so clearly I'm just that annoying that noone wants to date me #hopefully im irresistible to the English #cause being the only single person in your friend group #literal fucking hell #especially when your friends girlfriend tries to tell you the only reason you are single is cause you dont try hard enough #like dude its actually probably cause i physically cannot have a conversation with someone new without forgetting how to literally speak #so they always think there is something wrong with me #which there may well be but i dont knwo cause the closest i got to a diagnosis was the lady on camhs telling me the reason i couldn't sleep #was anxiety #but then i never went back cause my dad was too bsuy to be able to drive me to appointments #i domt mean to sound attention seeking when i say i genuinely think i am not mentally okay #but i cannot afford a therapist and its only free with the nhs if your suicidal and willing to wait 2 years

[ten-of-imps]

Ten rants about someone they've met who were so authentic they forgot they live on earth and has to be considerate about others

While leaving a conversation when it stops being enjoyable and comfortable is an admirable trait to have, and one I need need to add to my skills and habits, being so focused on yourself, on the other hand, is not. It's time to stop thinking you're the shit, telling fcking heavy stuff to someone you barely know, sitting in your distant Moon thinking how authentic you are, how you know who you are and what you like (not even gonna mention how you dont even bother asking the other person) and that's what the other person has to know about you, pretending that you did so much self growth people just left you because they couldn't handle the new you. No darling, they left because you became more annoying than before. No darling, you're not authentic, you're selfish and you are in this conversation for yourself, so someone else would bring more pleasure in your life. I think you want to catch someone who would somehow care about you the same amount you do, without you having to do any work. That's not how it works

The way people use authentic as a means to let the world spin around themselves is fascinating. I haven't yet seen it taken that far, although I've seen people do it with other concepts. And I am so angry because there's so much I want to say to them, and tell them how fcking nasty it is what they're doing. But from their reaction to me saying how I feel around a certain topic I see they don't care and don't really see nuance that much, or care about taking time to see someone else's perspective. So there's no point. And I'm angry, because it was me who had to run first after that first day. I had to leave first. And I didn't. Why is it that I will try to listen to other people, but I ignore my own voice?

I really didn't think it will end this meh for me, and I thought I will entertain this and see where in the actual hell this will end. And we're deep guys, or maybe im naive and we were just past the first gates. I knew we were deep when life advice started. '' No no no i see people as good and just tired maybe, you should too, this helped me''. Wait did I asked you? Did I started a debate where I saw you taking my points seriously so you expect me to do the same? No? Thought so.

Authenticity means shit if you don't know how to listen to others and always think they are the problem and you're oh so deep and emotionally mature (the irony in this sentence). Ohmygod im so frustrated right now I'm going to explode!

Fucking trust your gut, and if its telling you this won't take long to start shiting knives, it's not worth it.

Believe in yourself and leave the damn alone. Leave the conversation, especially if they say so many already left. THERE WERE REASONS AND THEY ARE NOT SEEING IT!!! Which means they have no self doubt. They think they are right about everything, which is just crazy. They might be fine, but if you sense something's off, IT'S NOT WORTH IT!

#Ten rants #I'm so angry #I have abandonment and rejection issues so this hit hard #Uhhhrrr im frustrated #But it's better to express this in safe space than try to make some sence with them #When you're authentic but forget you live around other people and have responsibility to care about them #I really wish I felt like a better person than them but I can't just put them down so much #But I think they did think they were better than everyone else with how they gave advice left and right #Like they knew better and no one else in the world was a thinking life experiencing being #Oh I'm so mad #I'll need a few days for this to calm down in me

[emphistic]

Bf!Sukuna who sometimes calls you 'girlfriend' — and not in a flamboyant way

"Girlfriend, c'mere."

"What do you want, girlfriend?"

"Sure, girlfriend."

Bf!Sukuna who loves having your lips on his; he'll just randomly come up to you and slot his lips against yours without a word

Bf!Sukuna who walks around the house shirtless, and teases you by saying, "You should try it out," only to get a pillow thrown at his head

Bf!Sukuna who would pause his video game just for you

Bf!Sukuna who is actually super clingy, and cannot function without having you in a foot radius — but will never admit it

"I'm going to go get groceries now."

"I'll come with you," he said, immediately standing up from the couch.

"I thought you hated errands."

Sukuna shrugged, "'m bored."

Bf!Sukuna who spits in your food when you're not looking

Bf!Sukuna who, when he can't sleep, will just stare at you — a few times, you've woken up to his creepy crimson eyes staring back at you, and you socked him in the jaw

Bf!Sukuna who claims to hate your music, but whenever you two are in the car, he'll always let you handle the aux

Bf!Sukuna who purposely forgets to do your laundry so he can see you be forced to wear his clothes instead

Bf!Sukuna who is the king of keeping eye contact

Bf!Sukuna who'll hover around while you do your makeup and just ask random questions

"What does that do?"

"Why the fuck is it shaped like that?"

"It's almost as big as my dick."

Bf!Sukuna who steals your things and raises them above his head where you can't reach just to mess with you

Bf!Sukuna who never gets cold, and while that may seem like a good thing in the winter because you have a personal heat generator, it is the absolute worst during the summer — you have to ban cuddling because Sukuna is just too damn warm

Bf!Sukuna who doesn't help you bring in groceries, even if your hands are full

Bf!Sukuna who ignores you for the rest of the day if you forget to give him a good morning kiss, or good morning text (if you guys are temporarily apart)

Bf!Sukuna who is good at everything he touches

— a/n: kinda irrelevant if you ask me, but I just had to include this

Bf!Sukuna who pretends to forget if you guys have planned a date together

Bf!Sukuna who gets a hard-on when he sees your angry face; he loves having you pull on his ear and drag him away to a secluded area to hear you yell at him — he thinks you sound so sexy and look so hot

Bf!Sukuna who isn't above doing extreme pda when he sees someone staring at your ass

Bf!Sukuna who whines about going to work, claiming it's boring, but in reality: he just doesn't want to leave you — or vice versa: he doesn't want you to leave for work

Bf!Sukuna who swears up and down he doesn't want kids and hates children, but when he sees you taking care of his little brother Yuuji, he finds himself doing a mental 180°

Bf!Sukuna who goes into a trance staring at your ass

Bf!Sukuna who has no purpose for an Instagram account: you forced him to make one — he never posts on there, but when does, it's only pictures of you and occasionally him and you

Bf!Sukuna who has a drum set in your guys' shared apartment, but refuses to play it for anyone but you, and even then, he only plays to annoy you or wake you up from your nap

Bf!Sukuna who permanently quit smoking when he saw you plugging your nose near him

Bf!Sukuna who enjoys chasing you around the apartment, sometimes with a knife in hand just to make you extra scared

Taglist: @starlets-things @sad-darksoul @mochimoee @r0ckst4rjk (pls lmk if u only want to be tagged in my boy nextdoor series or all of my work) @lillycore

#sukuna x reader #ryomen x reader #sukuna x you #jjk x reader #jjk x you #sukuna fluff #sukuna headcanons