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#I'm up to good for you now as I make this post
pomefioredove · 2 days
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now I'm actually invested in this idea. maybe I'll write a full length fic someday idk... for now I have short hcs
summary: crowley decides to "give away" yuu to the highest "donation" for financial reasons type of post: headcanons characters: all nrc students additional info: can be read as platonic or romantic, except malleus is pretty romantic, second person pov, yuu is gender neutral, maybe a little ooc I wrote this as soon as I got up
crowley has had his fair share of "what the fuck" moments from you but this was really taking the cake
he acts so... casual about it?
swaggers into ramshackle one morning and says times are tough and your personal expenses are straining the budget so he's decided to "put you in someone else's care"
"The screening process will be vigorous to make sure you end up in good hands!" like you're a cat or something "Your expenses will be covered and you'll have somewhere to go during break!"
okay great. pretty obvious you have no say in this, so you don't even argue. what's the worst that could happen?
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
Ace, Deuce, Jack, and Epel find you the next day to say they're pooling their money to buy you
"To what?"
Epel shrugs. "Oh, well Crowley said we need to offer a donation to prove we're capable of supporting you..."
(you think that if not for the laws of this land you would have slaughtered that old fart)
Jack goes on a really long tirade about how shady and underhanded this is, making sure to reaffirm that he believes you should be free to make your own choices
"So you'll let me go once you get me?"
"Uhhh..."
Ace thinks once they buy you you'll have no choice but to do all of his homework for him
Deuce says that's not really how it works- and even if he tried, Riddle would kill him
(they've already gone over this twice before finding you)
Epel happily volunteers to take you home with him over breaks, probably the only positive in this mess
even if he thinks the whole thing is kind of funny
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
incapable of keeping his mouth shut, Ace accidentally spills the plan to Riddle, who is understandably aghast
you can't just give away a person under your care like a toy!
of all the irresponsible things...
of course, he'll have to put up his offer, too
purely for your sake! with a nicer room and a brand new copy of the dorm rules, maybe you'll stop getting yourself into trouble
he's got some family money (doctors, naturally) and considers this a worthwhile purchase, for his sanity and yours
of course, Trey and Cater overhear and may or may not be pooling their own cash for a chance, too
going behind Riddle's back on this is a risky venture, but hey, someone's gotta be on your side, here, right?
I mean, between a bunch of sixteen year old boys, the housewarden, and them, who would you choose?
actually don't answer that
...not that it's much of a secret, anyway. Cater's already got their gofundme equivalent link in bio
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
Leona initially plans to have you become a live-in lackey like Ruggie
but then he really starts thinking- and, hey, the possibilities are endless, right?
for one, you'd make a really good pillow
he might have to kick Grim out for your full attention, but you could learn to live with that
and malleus would hate it
...that's reason enough for him
plus, he's got money to burn, so why not?
either way, he sets his bid at a reasonable (maybe too confident) price and sits back to watch the chaos unfold as everyone scrambles for a piece of the pie
news travels fast around school, after all
then Ruggie finds out that you could dethrone him as Leona's #2 and is understandably a little annoyed
that's his cushy post-grad job gig, thank you! he's worked hard for that!
besides, why should Leona get to hoard you? the guy can barely take care of himself!
so, Ruggie ends up outsourcing to a few dozen classmates for the necessary funds at a steep I-owe-you price
he's gonna be eating nothing but dandelions for a while...
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
now, Azul is annoyed
once the news goes school-wide, it's all anyone can talk about
talk about good marketing...
why didn't he think of such a brilliant scam? he could have negotiated with Crowley to have a café brand deal tie-in!
of course, he's already set his bid, with Jade and Floyd offering to pitch in as necessary
it's a risky investment, sure, but a worthwhile one
Azul tells everyone that with the prefect's "obvious" popularity, having them at the café a few nights a week would drive sales through the roof
though that's really just what he says to shirk suspicion
a likely excuse coming from him, though, really, it would just be nice having you around
and if not for his own affections, Floyd's incessant begging and Jade's subtly manipulative comments about "how nice" it would be having a new face around would be enough for him to cave eventually
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
"Kalim, no," is the first thing that Jamil says
"I strongly advise against this. It's another one of Crowley's silly scams and you could end up a target bec- are you even listening?"
hint: he is not
the second Kalim found out that he could get to take in his favorite magicless student like one of his treasures, he was all over it
(AKA infinite sleepovers)
and for what? a little optional donation to prove he's got the funds? he's got cash to spare!
he's already got your new room in Scarabia set up before he even puts his bid in
right next to his of course :)
and despite what Jamil insists, he himself might be working behind the curtain just a little to ensure he's the one who ends up with you
after all, why should Kalim get everything? this might be a valuable learning opportunity for him
You don't always get what you want
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
as much as Epel tries to keep the rest of his dorm from finding out, it's inevitable
he's actually a little surprised that the news didn't get to Vil sooner
with Rook around campus, surely he must have said something...
when Vil does find out, though, he just sighs
oh, of course. what next, will everyone meet each other in the arena and fight to the death over the prefect?
of all the silly, immature things...
oh? what's that? he's bidding anyway? of course he is, silly potato. he can't have some unwashed miscreant making you sleep on polyester bedding
(really, he's the only person on campus worthy of your time)
Rook has also been mysteriously absent from the dorm lately, though his initials on a poem and a strangely large sum of money end up in the donation pile
but really, that could be anyone... Rook would never dare betray Vil again, right?
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
Ortho finds out directly from the other first years and sends Idia the details immediately
with a little note of encouragement, of course: "could be excellent for improving your social skills!"
Idia understandably freaks out
"WTF!!!! nooo way! this is a person, not a chatbot we're talking about here! I can barely keep virtual pets alive!!!!"
(liar)
(...but this is still different)
the conversation ends there, but semi-anonymous bid from someone named "gloomurai" gets cashapp'd directly to crowley
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
everyone in the room immediately turns to Malleus
"For the record, I think it's wrong to be bargaining over a human being," Silver says first. "But if anyone could handle it with grace, it's you."
Lilia laughs. "Oh, you're just saying that because you like the prefect so much!"
"Father, you're the one who likes the prefect so much,"
"Oh, right! carry on then. After all, I'm sure we could share,"
Sebek is the only one relatively against the idea, though Lilia luckily manages to get him to lower his voice after his third speech about how you aren't good enough for his liege
Malleus is rather quiet through the whole evening, neither agreeing nor disagreeing with any of the points made
he disappears for a short while, and when he comes back he seems a little more confident
though, of course, he goes to you first
seeing him at Ramshackle in the middle of the night is a familiar and welcoming sight after all of the chaos of your week
and he's in a great mood!
"Child of man! I've come with news," he says. "I have heard of your predicament and have come up with a solution!"
you immediately sulk. "Oh, no. You know I think this whole thing is terrible, right?"
"Yes, Silver mentioned you might not like the idea of being bought and sold like a trinket. But worry not, I do not plan on paying for you in money,"
you pause, at a loss for words, and then tentatively continue. "You're not...?"
"Of course not. What a primitive idea, I was baffled to hear it myself. My proposal will be more traditional: a modest sum of treasure, and a generous amount of livestock and the finest crop Briar Valley can offer,"
certainly he's not this naive, you think
"You really think Crowley is going to accept that over money? I'm pretty sure Kalim just bid away an entire country's worth,"
he laughs. "You speak as if this is some kind of business deal! I'm quite confident that my dowry will be best,"
huh. that was a strange way of putting it
but then again, you still didn't really understand how things work here, so you go along with it
and you allow yourself to relax. he seems confident in his offer, and he doesn't even see you as some kind of prize to win!
"Oh, well, alright. Thanks! I'm glad you're on it,"
he smiles. "Rest assured, child of man, you're in good hands. My dowry will far outshine the others, and the wedding will be even better,"
"I was honestly getting a little nervous for a momen- wait- wedding!?"
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imsobadatnicknames2 · 10 hours
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How can you consider yourself any sort of leftist when you defend AI art bullshit? You literally simp for AI techbros and have the gall to pretend you're against big corporations?? Get fucked
I don't "defend" AI art. I think a particular old post of mine that a lot of people tend to read in bad faith must be making the rounds again lmao.
Took me a good while to reply to this because you know what? I decided to make something positive out of this and use this as an opportunity to outline what I ACTUALLY believe about AI art. If anyone seeing this decides to read it in good or bad faith... Welp, your choice I guess.
I have several criticisms of the way the proliferation of AI art generators and LLMs is making a lot of things worse. Some of these are things I have voiced in the past, some of these are things I haven't until now:
Most image and text AI generators are fine-tuned to produce nothing but the most agreeable, generically pretty content slop, pretty much immediately squandering their potential to be used as genuinely interesting artistic tools with anything to offer in terms of a unique aesthetic experience (AI video still manages to look bizarre and interesting but it's getting there too)
In the entertainment industry and a lot of other fields, AI image generation is getting incorporated into production pipelines in ways that lead to the immiseration of working artists, being used to justify either lower wages or straight-up layoffs, and this is something that needs to be fought against. That's why I unconditionally supported the SAG-AFTRA strikes last year and will unconditionally support any collective action to address AI art as a concrete labor issue
In most fields where it's being integrated, AI art is vastly inferior to human artists in any use case where you need anything other than to make a superficially pretty picture really fast. If you need to do anything like ask for revisions or minor corrections, give very specific descriptions of how objects and people are interacting with each other, or just like. generate several pictures of the same thing and have them stay consistent with each other, you NEED human artists and it's preposterous to think they can be replaced by AI.
There is a lot of art of the internet that consists of the most generically pretty, cookie-cutter anime waifu-adjacent slop that has zero artistic or emotional value to either the people seeing it or the person churning it out, and while this certainly was A Thing before the advent of AI art generators, generative AI has made it extremely easy to become the kind of person who churns it out and floods online art spaces with it.
Similarly, LLMs make it extremely easy to generate massive volumes of texts, pages, articles, listicles and what have you that are generic vapid SEO-friendly pap at best and bizzarre nonsense misinformation at worst, drowning useful information in a sea of vapid noise and rendering internet searches increasingly useless.
The way LLMs are being incorporated into customer service and similar services not only, again, encourages further immiseration of customer service workers, but it's also completely useless for most customers.
A very annoyingly vocal part the population of AI art enthusiasts, fanatics and promoters do tend to talk about it in a way that directly or indirectly demeans the merit and skill of human artists and implies that they think of anyone who sees anything worthwile in the process of creation itself rather than the end product as stupid or deluded.
So you can probably tell by now that I don't hold AI art or writing in very high regard. However (and here's the part that'll get me called an AI techbro, or get people telling me that I'm just jealous of REAL artists because I lack the drive to create art of my own, or whatever else) I do have some criticisms of the way people have been responding to it, and have voiced such criticisms in the past.
I think a lot of the opposition to AI art has critstallized around unexamined gut reactions, whipping up a moral panic, and pressure to outwardly display an acceptable level of disdain for it. And in particular I think this climate has made a lot of people very prone to either uncritically entertain and adopt regressive ideas about Intellectual Propety, OR reveal previously held regressive ideas about Intellectual Property that are now suddenly more socially acceptable to express:
(I wanna preface this section by stating that I'm a staunch intellectual property abolitionist for the same reason I'm a private property abolitionist. If you think the existence of intellectual property is a good thing, a lot of my ideas about a lot of stuff are gonna be unpalatable to you. Not much I can do about it.)
A lot of people are suddenly throwing their support behind any proposal that promises stricter copyright regulations to combat AI art, when a lot of these also have the potential to severely udnermine fair use laws and fuck over a lot of independent artist for the benefit of big companies.
It was very worrying to see a lot of fanfic authors in particular clap for the George R R Martin OpenAI lawsuit because well... a lot of them don't realize that fanfic is a hobby that's in a position that's VERY legally precarious at best, that legally speaking using someone else's characters in your fanfic is a much of a violation of copyright law as stright up stealing entire passages, and that any regulation that can be used against the latter can be extended against the former.
Similarly, a lot of artists were cheering for the lawsuit against AI art models trained to mimic the style of specific artists. Which I agree is an extremely scummy thinbg to do (just like a human artist making a living from ripping off someone else's work is also extremely scummy), but I don't think every scummy act necessarily needs to be punishable by law, and some of them would in fact leave people worse off if they were. All this to say: If you are an artist, and ESPECIALLY a fan artist, trust me. You DON'T wanna live in a world where there's precedent for people's artstyles to be considered intellectual property in any legally enforceable way. I know you wanna hurt AI art people but this is one avenue that's not worth it.
Especially worrying to me as an indie musician has been to see people mention the strict copyright laws of the music industry as a positive thing that they wanna emulate. "this would never happen in the music industry because they value their artists copyright" idk maybe this is a the grass is greener type of situation but I'm telling you, you DON'T wanna live in a world where copyright law in the visual arts world works the way it does in the music industry. It's not worth it.
I've seen at least one person compare AI art model training to music sampling and say "there's a reason why they cracked down on sampling" as if the death of sampling due to stricter copyright laws was a good thing and not literally one of the worst things to happen in the history of music which nearly destroyed several primarily black music genres. Of course this is anecdotal because it's just One Guy I Saw Once, but you can see what I mean about how uncritical support for copyright law as a tool against AI can lead people to adopt increasingly regressive ideas about copyright.
Similarly, I've seen at least one person go "you know what? Collages should be considered art theft too, fuck you" over an argument where someone else compared AI art to collages. Again, same point as above.
Similarly, I take issue with the way a lot of people seem EXTREMELY personally invested in proving AI art is Not Real Art. I not only find this discussion unproductive, but also similarly dangerously prone to validating very reactionary ideas about The Nature Of Art that shouldn't really be entertained. Also it's a discussion rife with intellectual dishonesty and unevenly applied definition as standards.
When a lot of people present the argument of AI art not being art because the definition of art is this and that, they try to pretend that this is the definition of art the've always operated under and believed in, even when a lot of the time it's blatantly obvious that they're constructing their definition on the spot and deliberately trying to do so in such a way that it doesn't include AI art.
They never succeed at it, btw. I've seen several dozen different "AI art isn't art because art is [definition]". I've seen exactly zero of those where trying to seriously apply that definition in any context outside of trying to prove AI art isn't art doesn't end up in it accidentally excluding one or more non-AI artforms, usually reflecting the author's blindspots with regard to the different forms of artistic expression.
(However, this is moot because, again, these are rarely definitions that these people actually believe in or adhere to outside of trying to win "Is AI art real art?" discussions.)
Especially worrying when the definition they construct is built around stuff like Effort or Skill or Dedication or The Divine Human Spirit. You would not be happy about the kinds of art that have traditionally been excluded from Real Art using similar definitions.
Seriously when everyone was celebrating that the Catholic Church came out to say AI art isn't real art and sharing it as if it was validating and not Extremely Worrying that the arguments they'd been using against AI art sounded nearly identical to things TradCaths believe I was like. Well alright :T You can make all the "I never thought I'd die fighting side by side with a catholic" legolas and gimli memes you want, but it won't change the fact that the argument being made by the catholic church was a profoundly conservative one and nearly identical to arguments used to dismiss the artistic merit of certain forms of "degenerate" art and everyone was just uncritically sharing it, completely unconcerned with what kind of worldview they were lending validity to by sharing it.
Remember when the discourse about the Gay Sex cats pic was going on? One of the things I remember the most from that time was when someone went "Tell me a definition of art that excludes this picture without also excluding Fountain by Duchamp" and how just. Literally no one was able to do it. A LOT of people tried to argue some variation of "Well, Fountain is art and this image isn't because what turns fountain into art is Intent. Duchamp's choice to show a urinal at an art gallery as if it was art confers it an element of artistic intent that this image lacks" when like. Didn't by that same logic OP's choice to post the image on tumblr as if it was art also confer it artistic intent in the same way? Didn't that argument actually kinda end up accidentally validating the artistic status of every piece of AI art ever posted on social media? That moment it clicked for me that a lot of these definitions require applying certain concepts extremely selectively in order to make sense for the people using them.
A lot of people also try to argue it isn't Real Art based on the fact that most AI art is vapid but like. If being vapid definitionally excludes something from being art you're going to have to exclude a whooole lot of stuff along with it. AI art is vapid. A lot of art is too, I don't think this argument works either.
Like, look, I'm not really invested in trying to argue in favor of The Artistic Merits of AI art but I also find it extremely hard to ignore how trying to categorically define AI art as Not Real Art not only is unproductive but also requires either a) applying certain parts of your definition of art extremely selectively, b) constructing a definition of art so convoluted and full of weird caveats as to be functionally useless, or c) validating extremely reactionary conservative ideas about what Real Art is.
Some stray thoughts that don't fit any of the above sections.
I've occassionally seen people respond to AI art being used for shitposts like "A lot of people have affordable commissions, you could have paid someone like $30 to draw this for you instead of using the plagiarism algorithm and exploiting the work of real artists" and sorry but if you consider paying an artist a rate that amounts to like $5 for several hours of work a LESS exploitative alternative I think you've got something fucked up going on with your priorities.
Also it's kinda funny when people comment on the aforementioned shitposts with some variation of "see, the usage of AI art robs it of all humor because the thing that makes shitposts funny is when you consider the fact that someone would spend so much time and effort in something so stupid" because like. Yeah that is part of the humor SOMETIMES but also people share and laugh at low effort shitposts all the time. Again you're constructing a definition that you don't actually believe in anywhere outside of this type of conversations. Just say you don't like that it's AI art because you think it's morally wrong and stop being disingenuous.
So yeah, this is pretty much everything I believe about the topic.
I don't "defend" AI art, but my opposition to it is firmly rooted in my principles, and that means I refuse to uncritically accept any anti-AI art argument that goes against those same principles.
If you think not accepting and parroting every Anti-AI art argument I encounter because some of them are ideologically rooted in things I disagree with makes me indistinguishable from "AI techbros" you're working under a fucked up dichotomy.
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zyafics · 2 days
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headspace | rafe cameron
pairing rafe cameron x female reader
summary when rafe hasn't seen you in twenty-four hours, he comes over to your house to check on you.
work count 1.0k
reader type academic weapon, burnout from studying (me), anxious, cries from being overwhelmed and pushes people away when busy
content fluff, suggestive tone near the end, rafe trying to be a good boyfriend, math (yuck!)
zya's notes was this purely self-indulgent? maybe. but it was a good writing break for me before i get back to linear algebra myself.
𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃 ⋆.˚ ⋆.˚ ⋆.˚ ⋆.˚
"What are you doing here?" You accuse, opening your bedroom door to discover your boyfriend standing behind it.
"I'm here to see you." Rafe says, taking in your appearance. You're wearing a borrowed tee of his, the name of his fraternity plastered in Greek letters, with shorts that's barely seen under the long material. "I've been texting you all day."
"You have?" You ask, your voice softening from the sharp undertone of your accusation. You're just so tired. "My phone's been on DND."
"Why?" He lets out a dry chuckle. He doesn't like the fact that you’ve been ignoring him. "You fuckin' someone?"
That earns him a scowl and Rafe knows he messed up when you pull on the doorknob, closing the limited space that allows him to see and enter your bedroom. "I'm not in the mood, Rafe. How'd you get in?"
He swallows hard. "Your mom let me in."
"She's home?" Your brows furrow together. You've lost track of time. You've been so busy that you didn't even hear your parents coming back from work. "Shit, what time is it?"
You abandon your post at the entryway and search for your phone in the messy covers of your bed. When you check the time, your heart drops. It's nearing midnight.
Rafe quietly slips into your room with his hands in his pockets and searches the place. He admits the first signs he looked for was the presence of another man. That you, in the twenty-four hours since he last saw you, have decided that he wasn't enough and that you found someone else. Instead, what he uncovers is your textbooks sprawled all over the floor, crinkled up sheets of papers surrounding your trashcan and your laptop and tablet propped on your desk with mathematical symbols and equations on the screen.
You weren't out finding his replacement. You were studying.
Your heart is racing, trying to figure out what to do next. You didn't even realize Rafe slipped to your side till his hand catches your wrist and pulls your attention away from your darkened phone screen.
"Hey." Rafe whispers, noticing the panic on your features. "Have you been studying all day? When was the last time you ate?"
Momentarily drawn away from your thoughts, you search your brain for an answer only to recall a distant memory of some yogurt and granola. 
"I don't know." You admit. Your chest tightening at the look of concern that flashes across his face. "I can't think about that right now."
"You can't think about food?" He repeats, incredulous. "You're the one who's always trying to get me to try new places."
He was trying to make you laugh, relax, but all it does is set your lips into a flat line. He really is not living up to the role of good boyfriend right now.
"I have a huge exam coming up in two days and I still don't understand a single concept. And it's midnight." You explain, your breathing growing more rapidly as the realization dawns on you. "I shouldn't have gone out with you yesterday, I knew that, but I went when I should’ve stayed in—"
"Hey, hey." He shushes you, his hands sliding up to your shoulders. He knows you're about to descend into a spiral right now. He can't let it happen. "Look at me."
You do.
"It's going to be okay. You're a smart girl, you're going to figure it out."
You shake your head, not believing him, to the point that you're pushing away from his touch, reeling back as if you don't deserve his comfort. "No, Rafe, it's not. It's worth 20% of my grade and I can't recall a single thing. I've been studying all day and I feel like I'm about to go insane because I don't get it. I have never not gotten something this bad before."
You can't stop the tears from welling in your eyes, your bottom lip trembling. First and foremost, you can't believe you're crying over math right now but the emotions are too strong to ignore—you feel like you're about to combust.
"Baby." Rafe begins softly, taking a step forward and pulling you back in. You try to resist but his grip is too strong and you like being in his embrace. Even if you don't deserve it. "Take a breath. Come on, let's take a break."
"I can't." Your voice cracks, a tear falling down your cheek and wetting his shirt. "I actually think I'm going to fail and it scares me."
Rafe knows you always cared about your academics. Way more than he does. But, it's one of the things he admires about you. That fact that you're so smart, that you manage to fall for a guy like him. He doesn't know of any way to help in that department, but fuck if he isn't going to try.
"Alright, how about this?" Rafe pulls apart, the loss of touch causes you to whimper, but his hand tucks under your chin and lifts your gaze to meet his. "We're going to get somethin' to eat. Any place you want, I don't care how far, and I'll drive."
You open your mouth to counter but he cuts you off. "Then, we're going to come back here and I'll help you study. All night if I have to. We're going to figure this out together, okay?"
The plan sounds appealing but you're still hesitant. "You don't know anything about linear algebra."
"Fuck, baby, you can teach me." He states, causing a small smile to rise on your lips. That makes him proud. "Isn't that the best way to learn? When the student become the teacher?"
"Are you saying you're my teacher?" You tilt your head, teasing him. He loves that you're coming to yourself again.
He lowers himself to your level, stopping next to the shell of your ear. "I'm about to teach you a lesson if you don't get a move on." He murmurs, lightly slapping your ass and releasing you in one-go. You let out a little yelp, jumping back.
He tips his head to your closet. "Get change. We got shit to do."
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lady-raziel · 1 day
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ALSO although i'm sure people are so fucking sick of hearing my thoughts by this point, I'd like to shut down the idea that because this essentially happened over the weekend that should excuse the lack of response (since watcher doesn't work weekends or so i've heard). look, i'm a person who totally supports a work-life balance and leaving work at the office. nobody deserves to be on call 24/7. that's not healthy and it doesn't make anyone more effective at their job.
however. there is a difference between logging out from a normal workday and logging out after you've just dropped a huge announcement that you've been hyping up, and doing so on a Friday afternoon before a tour. if a brand crisis occurs outside of work hours on a perfectly normal day, there's a little more leeway in not jumping on it right away as opposed to a time when you absolutely should be monitoring digital response, if only to pick out your favorite memes and posts to share on your socials (in the alternate universe where this subscription service move went really well and everyone loved it). not knowing what's going on at a time when you shouldn't be expected to know what's going on is pretty different than doing nothing when you absolutely should be watching for company news outside of normal hours.
all that being said, even in the first case where something bad happens that you need to take action on outside of work hours, waiting until Monday morning to do anything while the problem gets worse, particularly in a case like this with so much on the line, would get pretty much every comms or PR person I know severely reprimanded or fired. yes, you have a set work schedule each week. but in the end your job is to protect the brand, and you don't get to decide when threats come at you. your job is to formulate a response as soon as you know there's a problem. if you don't do that? you don't have a job anymore.
i say this with the full knowledge that watcher likely doesn't have a full "director of communications" role that entails reputation management on staff. They have a social media manager, yes, but full on corporate communications and all this other stuff really isn't (and shouldn't be!) that person's job description. (as a person who's worked as a social media manager i have a lot of thoughts about how other roles get smushed into that one and how that's not good for anyone, but that's another post.)
is it possible that watcher has contracted an outside firm to do PR/communications? sure. but in that case, a professional firm would ABSOLUTELY be on call over the weekend to help a client. that would literally be part of the fee paid to them. if they are paying a firm, and that firm hasn't helped them formulate a response and gotten it out by now, then they need to fire that group immediately. and also factor this into the conversation about money management if they've been paying a firm (none of which are cheap!) and getting such a horrible return on investment.
long story short, if your office building caught fire over the weekend, would you wait until Monday morning to do something? even if you don't own a fire extinguisher? even if you don't have a local fire department you can call? even if you were the one who set the building on fire? no-- because by then you might not even have an office anymore. emergencies aren't 9-to-5 problems.
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harmoonix · 7 hours
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🧚🏼‍♀️Fαιɾყƈσɾҽ🧚🏼‍♀️
*Unlock your inner fairy*
Tumblr media Tumblr media
────────────────────────────────
Come away with me now to the sky
Up all the hills and the sea
Far beyond where memories lie
To a place where Im free to be me
────────────────────────────────
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Earth Risings (Capricorn, Taurus, Virgo) have that amazing personality thanks to their strong aura and energy. They're that chill yet wholesome person
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Midheaven in Fire Signs will mostly wanna have a job based on their desires and on what they truly want/desire from life
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Having your 4H in an earth sign it can indicate your home can be your biggest comfort, out of all the places
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Moon aspecting the Ascendant brings that type "serene" energy to the native, calm, peaceful, I love how they resemble those things
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Saturn aspecting Venus want a high standard relationship because for them loyalty and teamwork matters a lot in the relationship
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Pluto aspecting Sun/Moon/Ascendant can be judged for who their are, or heavy criticized, it's important to be you even if you have haters
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🧚🏼‍♀️ - Moon in Gemini/Gemini Degrees 3°, 15°, 27° moon loves this energy of self - expressing, I always think about this placement as "life in colors"
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Neptune aspecting Mars will always have a fiery energy, is electrifying and yet charismatic, full of boosts of energy
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Juno aspecting the IC (4th house) will have that familiy oriented spouse, possibly someone who wants also to live a traditional marriage life
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Let the stars fill your soul, when the moon cradles all
So, to yourself be true
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🧚🏼‍♀️ - When you have your North Node in your 9H you gonna decide which faith you wanna follow, which religion, education, schools, you have free will in that area
🧚🏼‍♀️ - North Node in the 3rd/5th house gives you the chance to express yourself how you want, you achieve things in your life by being yourself
🧚🏼‍♀️ - When you have your Mars in your 3rd/6th or 8th house Mars will react either very energetic either very tired. It's important to keep a balance between how lazy you are and how productive you are
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🧚🏼‍♀️ - Water Suns can easily attach emotionally by others, crying in the same time?? Girl yes! Telling your secrets to each other? Girl no! There always should be a boundary between you and your emotional side
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Neptune in the 2H/4H/9H/12H can come from a background with a spiritual family, like your family members can be into spirituality
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Mars/Pluto or Venus in the 5H get tempted easily, like their lust is overdosed here, take care at your temptations especially if you're in relationship
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Suns in the 12H can have a various impacts, on the good side this placement can help at growing spirituality and the bad side it is that it will make you to self - doubt a lot (You're worth it🫶🏼)
🧚🏼‍♀️ - I already said in numerous posts that Venus in Earth Signs men are gentlemen, like their aura is screaming that (GENTLEMAN/MY MAN) I'm looking at Taurus Venus while saying this ofc
🧚🏼‍♀️ - My Juno is in fucking Aquarius okay..so there was once an Aquarius Sun guy who saw me as his "relationship material" and I was like "Um nope" his Juno was in Capricorn while my Sun is in Capricorn and I had no like for him 😅🫶🏼
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Can we appreciate Capricorns for wanting to date older people so they don't have to suffocate themselves with the ones who have not matured at a certain time
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🧚🏼‍♀️ - Cancer Moons will basically attach to your heart like a spider cloth, and it maybe devour it at some point. If you love them they gonna "devour" your love
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Moon in the 1st/3rd/5th/9th houses love to party and enjoy life, the soul of the party placement literally
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Juno in 2H/Juno in Taurus is giving spoiling spouse,girl "you wake up with 24k gold earrings beside your bed from your spouse"energy
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Aries/Scorpio and Sagittarius Mars are those bad bitches who nobody plays with like, they don't accept it
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Mars in the 11H or Mars in Aquarius can become quite obsessive/possesive around their friends but in the same time can have lots of conflicts with them because after all Mars is the planet of war
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Stellium or lots of placements in the 9th house can show love for traveling/exploring/ even learning new things
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🧚🏼‍♀️ - Stellium in the 5th house or in Leo can indicate a lot creativity, a very talented person, can indicate you love being yourself as well
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Juno in the 11H or in Aquarius can indicate your husband will for sure be one of your closest friends
🧚🏼‍♀️ - If someone has Pluto - Sun aspects you can tell they can be misunderstood a lot, is hard to fit in the norm if you're just trying to make a difference
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Aquarius Suns and Risings are different from their family members or relatives, like when you go for example and visit their family, these natives will always stand out of them
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Sun in your 6H/12H can make you just tired or drained easily, try to not force yourself to do certain things if you don't really want that
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Mars in the 1H/Aries Mars is an icon placement, it shows a lot of motivation and energy towards the things you wanna do in your life
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Jupiter conjunct/trine/sextile Mars makes you extremely ambitious, very desirable, and you can actually manifest things so fast with these placements
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Venus aspecting the Midheaven (in good aspects) can be appreciated at their work for their personality/aura/vibe
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🧚🏼‍♀️ - Having more Cardinal Signs in your chart than others (Aries, Cancer, Libra, Capricorn) shows you're not afraid of change, sudden changes, you're ready for everything that comes in your life
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Chiron aspecting Ascendant (all aspects) can indicate a very big journey when it comes to self - discovering and healing yourself!! Your healing era is precious
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Having your 8H in a fire sign shows a person who is very sensual/passionate/has lot of desires and lots of naughty thoughts
🧚🏼‍♀️ - When you and a person share the same Lilith sign, you can both understand eachother on a psychic level, you can also tell which bad traits you have to eachother
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Pisces Saturn has a lesson about becoming more spiritual and finding your inner faith in a way, being more connected with yourself
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Sun/Lilith or Saturn in the 10H can have really big issues with their dads, the dad can be controlling/strict or just mean with some of these placements
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Chiron in the 2H can also be about being more healthy in your diet, like eating more healthy food and keep a balance in your body
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~ Bad bitches grew up with Tinkerbell 🧚🏼‍♀️🫶🏼 ~
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sergle · 15 hours
Note
Every time YouTube nonsense happens I'm always like "I can't wait to see what Sergle says about this" because you're the only person I follow that talks about YouTube nonsense.
Please take this is an invitation for you to talk about the Watcher's apology video lol
I am a filthy youtube enjoyer so you can absolutely count on me and GODDDDDDDDDDD... I mean the apology is not NEARLY as funny as the blunder, so it hasn't kept my attention as much but like the obligatory upfront thing is that, like, it is good that they posted it, they apologized for being insensitive and whatever, they're not scraping their channel clean or going forward with their old plan to only post their shows on their own platform, and these are technically good and correct things, because they could have pretended not to notice all the negative feedback. So like, responding is good. BUT LIKE I HAVE QUESTIONS NOW... Because they took SO LONG to film and upload a video that basically is just "we fucked up, we're sorry, we're not gonna do that anymore", which doesn't exactly take a writer's room several days to cook, but I DIGRESS... They were quiet for long enough for everyone to LOOK REALLY CLOSE. After the initial reaction, people had time to do some pretty comprehensive cost breakdowns for their stuff, and for what they have to be pulling in from adsense, sponsored segments, patreon, merch, and touring Like, they'd need to be really mismanaging their finances, because they're doing very well for themselves, making good, stable money, and the vids they make are super duper advertiser friendly. SO... you take long enough without putting out a holder statement or a quick heel-turn apology or anything, it gives people more time to get comfortable with not liking you, and also to dig around and google things about you, or scrape up info/trivia about you to corroborate their new opinion of you. It gets personal, is what I mean. So pulling this move has still, at BEST, caused some permanent damage to their relationships with fans, in both directions. They all got a huge flood of negative feedback, and even a perfect, emotionally mature, non-entitled person would have a negative reaction to people being upset with them at such a high volume. But now they're gonna remember the things that people have said about them, and there's no way that at the very least, Steven isn't gonna feel spiteful about this. People TOTALLY unloaded on him (funny) (valid) about his evangelical christian conservative leaning tesla privileged out of touch boy gold flaked ice cream eating ways. He definitely is going to remember that ppl said they never liked him in the first place. As for Ryan and Shane, people didn't have any dirt on them, but they definitely still received a lot of angry messages from people, most of which will have been reasonable, but they're gonna remember the really really mean and intense ones. Anyway, they made a booboo dumb enough for jack to want to make a skit about it, so for that I'm very grateful, because I thought it was really really fucking funny
youtube
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pseudophan · 1 day
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guys i'm gonna be honest there was no way we weren't gonna drop down on the ship list this week, i'm actually pleasantly surprised we're on it at all. you gotta remember a lot of what drives a tag to the top are notes, as there tends to be more of those than individual posts, and famously there's been tags shooting up to number one just because One Post got like 100k notes in a week. my point being that since dan and phil only uploaded once last week there were less posts about new content which is what gets the most engagement by far so ofc we weren't going to climb the ranks
but that's all good! i think the overall goal here should be keeping it on the list rather than necessarily aiming for the top spot every week (though if we did get #1 once, against all odds, that would be hype as fuck). like i've said before it's not that we don't have enough people or posts to make it, you can see that by the dan and phil tag easily making the web stuff list, it's literally just been that people stopped tagging phan out of shame andddd i think now that people have, forcibly, gotten over that i think as long as we just keep using the phan tag in addition to the dan and phil one then we'll be golden. and the second dnp do something fucking insane again we're definitely climbing into the top 10 lmao
lets go team, rpf forever
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fuctacles · 2 days
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A tale as old as time
For @subeddieweek Day 7 | M | 2696 | cw: age gap (about 25-30y difference, Eddie's age is not stated, Steve's aligns with canon) | camboy Eddie, transmasc Eddie, kinda sugar daddy Steve?, modern AU, simp Steve, virgin Eddie, chatfic, pre-anything, gray ace Eddie
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"Hawkins High '86? How old is this guy?" Eddie asks himself, his eyebrows raised. There is a letterman in front of him, a gift from one of his top subscribers. Hell, his top subscriber. His number-one fan, who was responsible for about half of his revenue.
He's opened a PO box recently, with no little amount of worry about what kind of stuff he might get. He only gave the address to his top subscribers but he knew that the ones with the most money were usually the most unhinged. He went to the post office with his heart in his throat but all he got was a set of lingerie, a toy, and the letterman he was now holding.
He tried not to think about what kind of people would pay for his content. As long as he was making money he didn't care. But now he got a piece of one of them in his hands. Staring back.
1986.
Meaning the guy must be nearing 60. Double Eddie's age. 
He tries to imagine that. An older guy, with wrinkles, maybe a beer belly, a gross old t-shirt, and his hand permanently in his sweats, beating it to his photos. 
It was gross. And in a way, alluring.
Though someone with so much money to spend on a camboy must have a well-paying job. Some rich asshole, exploiting others to do the work for him. That's a more likely scenario. He tries not to think about big, rough hands on him when he puts on the jacket and takes pics for Shar.
He edits them a bit before sending them, knowing the guy will get a kick from seeing him in his jacket. The appeal of wearing your boyfriend's letterman eluded him in high school, but being claimed like that gave him a heady feeling. The fact that the guy could be his father apparently worked for him too. 
He doesn't put his phone away fast enough and sees the message that pops up.
Shar: So hot. You look like every repressed teen jock's dream
Shar: Definitely like mine
Eddie thinks a moment about his response, channeling the persona he takes on for the camera. 
PuppetOfMasters: Would I be your dirty secret?
PuppetOfMasters: Would you fuck me in the locker room behind your girlfriend's back?
Shar: I'd make YOU my girlfriend
Shar: Wait no
Shar: NOT LIKE THAT
Shar: A girlfriend but in a manly way
Eddie snorts.
You're good, he types. I know what you mean, don't worry.
He wouldn't keep around someone who didn't respect him. Besides, he made it clear he's saving for a transition with his Only Fans.
Thank god, Shar types. I respect who you are 
Shar: In fact, I spend so much money on you because of it. 
Eddie rolls onto his other side, his mood souring. One of those trans fetishists, then. That's fine, as long as he's being respectful and paying... Even if it leaves an unpleasant taste in his mouth. 
Ah, a connoisseur! Well, I hope I'm your favorite tranny, then, he jokes. He waits for an answer, but it doesn't come for a long while, so he flips his phone screen down and turns away, hoping for sleep.
A response is waiting for him when he wakes up. 
Shar: I guess it sounded that way, but I'm not that kind of pervert. You're the only trans sex worker I follow, but not the only trans person I've sent money to.
Eddie sauntered to the bathroom, not taking his eyes off his phone. He wonders if continuing the conversation is even the right move. He's talked to one too many guys who thought sending him a dick pick was okay after ten minutes of small talk between a content creator and a fan.
But he's kind of curious. When he has money to spare, he sends some change to other trans folks to help out, because he knows how hard it is from his own experience. But why Shar, a seemingly loaded old guy, would spend his money on queers instead of, let's say, starving children?
PuppetOfMasters: So you're just an ally with cash? Or is there more to it? I'm curious.
He goes through his morning routine, washing his face, and brushing his teeth, not expecting Shar to get back to him any time soon. So he's surprised when he picks his phone back up and a response is waiting.
Shar: Long story short, I hope my father is rolling in his grave while I spend his inheritance on people he hated so much.
That's not what Eddie expected at all. 
PuppetOfMasters: So I'm a means of rebellion against your bigoted dead father? I'll take that. I hate rich assholes
Shar: Me too
They don't talk for the whole day after that, but when Eddie's done running errands and editing in the evening, he looks back at the letterman hanging on the door of his wardrobe. 
How is sending me your letterman an act of rebellion? he asks. Because he's a curious little shit. 
The response comes fast like the guy is glued to his Only Fans chat. Gross. Eddie wonders briefly if he's talking with other sex workers there.
Shar: A souvenir of his precious high school fetishized on a queer ssex worker? He'd die if he hadn't already
So it is a fetish thing! Eddie smiles triumphantly at his phone.
Shar: Okay, fine
Shar: Sticking it to my father is just a bonus for you being really hot. 
Shar: And I do love seeing you in my letterman, I've jerked off to it three times already
Shar: is that what you wanted to hear?
Eddie grins, rolling on his bed.
PuppetOfMasters: Yes 
Shar: So yeah, I'm an old man who peaked in high school, laugh it up
PuppetOfMasters: I'd rather you peaked in me
Shar: Insufferable
Shar: Menace
Shar: Yeah, I'd love that. A man can dream, right?
Eddie bites his lip. How far is too far? The guy seems genuine and after the amount of creeps that's been chatting him up, he thinks his creep radar is quite good. Tentatively, he starts typing.
PuppetOfMasters: I don't know. I think people would like seeing me get railed by an older guy
Shar: An old guy, you mean
Shar: You'd make a video with me?
PuppetOfMasters: I record most of the sex I have, yes
Shar: Huh. I've never seen one before, then
PuppetOfMasters: warm, warmer
Shar: ... There aren't any?
PuppetOfMasters: din ding ding! ya boy is a virgin
Shar: shit
Shar: fuck
Shar: that's so hot
Shar: you'd let me?
PuppetOfMasters: Would I let my best-paying subscriber be my first time on camera? Probably
Not necessarily to be released but he couldn't lose the possibility of such golden content in case it was watchable. 
Shar: I'd better keep my spot then. Just in case.
PuppetOfMasters: No worries, you seem the most trustworthy so far anyway.
But as he types it, a new notification appears. Shar sent him a hefty tip on one of his photos.
PuppetOfMasters: That's really not necessary
PuppetOfMasters: But I hope your father is kicking and screaming in his coffin
Shar: I fucking hope so
----
It takes Eddie another day to google Hawkins High's yearbook photos. He'd thought about it before but didn't want to break the bubble of anonymity between himself and his fan. But the thoughts of big hands on his hips, and beard rubbing against his neck, took root in his brain and were tainting his mind.
Not fully in tune with his body and distrustful of others, Eddie has been single for most of his life. And now his stupid horny brain was drooling at the thought of losing his virginity to a grandpa on the internet. 
Hoping it would help his thoughts calm down, he looks through the photos from the year 1986, in search of a Harrington. And he finds him.
Steve Harrington. Basketball captain and swim team co-captain. His hairdo was magnificent and his smile was self-confident. Eddie would hate him in high school. Should probably hate him now. So he expands his search further, beyond the Hawkins High memory lane.
He finds one single photo on a LinkedIn profile. 
The current Steve Harrington's hair is no less magnificent, just peppered with silver. He wears glasses now, which accentuate the line of his jaw and make his neatly trimmed facial hair pop out. He's wearing a yellow jacket and a white golf, which should be hideous but weirdly, works for him. Eddie doesn't get to see his eyes, unfortunately. The photo looks like a candid photo shoot take-out after someone told him a joke. His head is tilted down, eyes scrunched and lips pulled in a smile, as a bubbling laugh got immortalized on camera.
Eddie shouldn't be finding a sixty-year-old man this endearing. 
PuppetOfMasters: I like your LinkedIn photo
PuppetOfMasters: Well, I hope it's you. 
PuppetOfMasters: Steve, right?
He can't forget about this for the whole day, not as he budgets his income, and especially not when he records a short video jerking off in the shower. He tries not to look at his phone but it's his only one, so he does while trying to budget in a second one, just for sex work. Maybe then he wouldn't be feeling so insane about not getting a response from a stranger who is an old pervert spending loads of money on him. 
He tries to be normal when a chat notification finally pops up. 
Shar: If you saw the golf and yellow jacket photo, that's me
Shar: though please don't make me type my full name in here.
no worries, Eddie types back so fast he should be embarrassed. It's a good photo.
Shar: Thanks. My best friend took it 
PuppetOfMasters: Your friend has a good eye
Shar: I'll let her know
Shar: I'm surprised it took you this long to search me up
Eddie's surprised too. Usually, his curiosity would take over him sooner.
PuppetOfMasters: I tried not to pry. But I had to in case we were gonna meet up one day
Shar: So you were serious?
Shar: I've been wondering if you sweet-talk all your followers like that 
PuppetOfMasters: Only the ones that don't send me dick pics
Shar: I knew holding back would pay off
Eddie snorts at his phone. 
Though I might need one before we meet up, he types. Gotta know what I'm working with
Shar: Right. Of course
Shar: So how would that work?
Eddie hasn't thought about it this far.
PuppetOfMasters: I need to read about OF's policy on collabs. Never had to before, since I work solo. Would probably have to hire you, well, sign a commission/gig contract or something like that. So it's all legal and shit.
Shar, Steve, doesn't answer for a long while, and it might be the end of his devirginizing journey. Well, if the guy doesn't want to make this legal, put his name on some paperwork, then he isn't trustworthy, and that's the end of it.
It's half an hour later and Eddie's bitten all his nails off trying not to follow up with any messages and focus on anything else when an answer finally comes.
Shar: Sorry my friend was bothering me
Shar: this sounds more complicated than I anticipated. So I would be like, a co-creator, then?
PuppetOfMasters: Precisely
Shar: Holy shit okay
Shar: Thought I'd be you know, less involved
Though you could hit it and quit it, huh? Eddie scrunched his nose. What was he getting himself into? Gods.
Shar: If that's what you wanted I'd take it
Eddie shouldn't be blushing over this one. It's like he's throwing the man scraps and he's licking them up.
PuppetOfMasters: Simp
Shar: I am what I am
Shar: With that said, I'm willing to make it work. Do all the paperwork you need
PuppetOfMasters: Doing paperwork just to fuck me? so romantic
Shar: I suck at paperwork so my friend would be doing it anyway
Shar: If that's okay
PuppetOfMasters: I think it's best if someone looks it over, yeah
Eddie hesitates for a moment.
PuppetOfMasters: That friend doesn't happen to be your wife?
Fuck no, comes the immediate response
Shar: I'm perpetually single and she's as gay as they come. 
PuppetOfMasters: Good. Wouldn't want to be the other girl
Shar: If I had the chance you'd be the only one
PuppetOfMasters: Jesus.
Eddie squeezes his legs together unconsciously.
PuppetOfMasters: Stop sweet talking me, I've already agreed to fuck
Shar: But we haven't signed anything yet. Even then, I'll keep sweet-talking you. It's what you deserve. 
For the first time, Eddie thinks he might not survive their meeting. And not because of the possible killer scenario. Thankfully, Steve gets back to business talk.
Shar: How would this work, legal stuff aside? Do you script this?
PuppetOfMasters: Do I look like I script shit?
Shar: I'm not the one with Only Fans
PuppetOfMasters: Fair. I think we could just set up cameras and do whatever we feel like. Then decide together if the footage will be released or not. 
Shar: Sounds reasonable
Shar:When would you want to do this?
When?
Eddie hasn't thought that far. In fact, he felt like he hadn't been thinking for the past couple of days. 
I'm the sole god of my schedule so I'm open to anything, he types evasively.
Shar: I have some time off next month, could fly to wherever you need me
Next month seemed close. Extremely close. Or maybe it wasn't? He never worked with anyone before. Hell, he didn't even have that many friends to meet up with. 
Next month works I guess, he answers despite his nerves.
Shar: Wanna face time before we start the legal work?
His nerves escalate, making his mouth dry. He reminds himself he's done this before, he's on camera all the time. 
PuppetOfMasters: Like, right now?
Shar: Yeah?
PuppetOfMasters: Ok, give me five minutes.
Eddie shoots up, checks himself in the mirror, and finds a good angle for his phone to set up. He lowkey hopes Steve picks up with his dick in the frame so Eddie can block him with a clear conscience and forget about the whole thing. When six minutes from his last message pass, he hits 'call'.
"Hi," Eddie squeaks when the video connects. Steve Harrington's arms are in the frame, crossed on the desk, and toned where he's leaning on them.
"Hi," he greets him with a dazzling smile. 
It is the guy from the photo, so at least he's not being catfished. And he has none of the creepy simp energy Eddie feared. He's just... a guy. It's both a relief and a disappointment. 
"Well?" the guy asks.
"Well, what?" Eddie frowns. 
"Are you disappointed? Am I too old?"
Eddie looks at him properly. His hair is lighter on the sides, but not grey yet, and the video quality doesn't make any wrinkles stand out to him. Maybe some worry lines, crow's feet if he squints. He looks like he keeps in shape, too. Eddie wouldn't call him old. Mature, maybe. A DILF slowly transforming into a Silver Fox. 
"You look fine. Good. You look good. Attractive," Eddie fumbles with his words and barely stops himself from facepalming. This is why he mostly texts.
Steve smirks at him. And holy shit, a dude twice his age smirking at him shouldn't be doing things to his body.
"You sure? You're not gonna block me after we hang up, are you?"
Eddie shakes his head.
"I stand by our plans. You're passing my creep radar so far, but uh..." He scratches his cheek nervously. "I'd like to keep in touch in case, you know. A red flag pops up. I hope you get it."
Steve nods, his expression growing serious.
"Absolutely. We're strangers, after all."
"Yeah." Eddie nods, relieved. It would give him ample time and opportunities to back out.
On the screen, Steve leans more on his arms, closer to the camera. 
"So I think dick assessment is next on the checklist?"
Eddie might not even survive video calls with this guy, after all. 
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AITA for throwing away a birthday gift my friend got me because of who they are hanging out with?
I (now 19f) had a birthday a few weeks back. My friend Jane (20f) had gotten me a gift but hadn't been able to give it to me yet. Jane posted on her story that she was eating dinner with Alice (I think 25f?).
For this to make sense and so I dont get a ton of INFO comments, let me go into detail about Alice.
Alice used to be someone I went to for advice. She helped me with school, she gave me advice on crushes, was just overall like a big sister to me. When I was 10 I know my mother trusted her enough to have her babysit me (the thing with Alice is she has always been so mature, literally everyone has always thought she was older then she was which is why I dont know for sure if she is 25). I thought she would always be a good sister-like figure in my life.
However, I got in a relationship with Mark and it was like all hell broke loose. Mark says she is jealous because they used to have a thing (everyone thought they were together but they claimed they never were, Mark says she liked him but he turned her down but had fun flirting at the time). Alice told me she was concerned because of the age difference, which made no sense to me because she talked to someone who was 10 years older then her when she was 21/22. Alice also made negative comments about Mark that were extremely rude.
It really felt like Alice was trying to break me and Mark up! Mark is older than Alice and said that she always has done this when he dates anyone and thats why he hasn't dated much (the last girl he dated was Alice's friend and they stopped being friend's after they had broken up, I remember this because Alice was upset her friend made her choose between them or Mark when Alice had been friends with Mark since she was a very young kid).
We didn't invite Alice to the wedding because she didn't like our relationship (why would I want you there to celebrate if you don't even care for us?). We also didn't invite her because Alice and Mark stopped being friends for a year or two before we got together and it would have been awkward for Mark. I told Jane that I didn't want to hang out with Alice and encouraged Jane not to as well.
And I thought Jane hadn't, but now I see she still is. Jane said that Alice isn't a bad person and just because I'm not friends with her doesn't mean she plans on stopping. Jane told me that Alice still cares for me and if I wanted to talk to her I could, but I don't want to. Jane went on and we started arguing, and I dont remember what all was said by us, but then she cursed me out. In response, I threw the still wrapped gift in the trash.
Jane isnt talking to me anymore. Mark says its probably a good thing since she wasn't a good friend. At the time I felt justified but there's a pit in my stomach and I wonder if I went a bit too far? AITA?
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melanthaeunomia · 1 day
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A Metal Romance🏹 -Leo Valdez x Reader (Established Relationship)
A/N : Just a few drabbles of Leo, This is a late post, I've been busyy, im slowly but surely writing the stuff you guys requested, i'm so sorry this request has been in my inbox for like weeks now but i hope you enjoy!!
Wc: 1.1k
Warning : Kisses, Suggestive, fluff
"His girl" D1 (!Sweet) "Looking for a distraction" D2 (!suggestive)
Riordan verse Masterlist⚜️
"His Girl"
Skipping through, and peacefully humming as you were on your way to go to arts and craft, you were assigned to lead the class that day. until a hand from the trees pulled you by your arm twirling you as you go, a startled noise escape from your lips, making you stumble into a broad chest "Boo" "Leo!" you breathe a sigh of relief, realizing it was only your boyfriend "Don't do that!" you playfully hit him, "You should've seen your face!" He chuckled, the sun glistening on his curls as he rolled his head back, making you roll your eyes, crimson lush printing your cheeks, "why are you here?-" you cupped his face wiping a line of leftover grease with your finger "heh- i uhm.." he gulped a lump in his throat, flustered eyes maintaining contact with yours.
normally by this time he would've grabbed your waist, embracing you. but as your eyes shifted to his lower half, you noticed how he kept his hand out of sight. seemingly gripping onto something on his back, you raised your brow "i made something for you." he whispered kissing your cheek, before pulling out his hand to reveal a delicate locket resembling a a real beating heart. Intricate details that was made with precise hands "I-i thought you'd like it.." He mumbled, cheeks flushed, looking down, not being able to see how hard you melted with his gesture, taking in the metal in your hand examining the rust brown color as if a patina of ancient iron "Leo.. Its beautiful..." The pupils in your eyes itself turning into a heart shape, cheeks like the color of it. "Turn it around" he stuttered now hiding his face in his hands, you tilt your head slowly turning the locket onto its flat side, Your heart eyed pupils widening as you read the words engraved "Leo's girl" and you looked back at him, surprised when his attitude changed to being flustered into a smug look with a shit eating grin "Leo's girl?" You repeated your cheeks bursting out blood "well you are aren't you?" The corner of his lips curling into a wider smirk "Now c'mon" He took the necklace and clasped it on you himself "Its so pretty.." Your compliments only making his ego grow and his hand found its way to your waist, lips pressing a soft kiss to your cheeks "thank you.." You wrapped your arms around his neck, his hands keeping a tight but gentle grip on your waist.
"Looking for a distraction."
You were heading back to your cabin when you bumped into Charles, Who was rushing and looked panicked, carrying 6 wrapped packages "Oh! whats up?.." You asked, the boxes almost towering over you, and he apologized for his rushed antics "I-im sorry, chiron got me running errands all day, have to deliver things" He sighed almost dropping one of the box but quickly balanced it back to its position, "are you by chance going to the cabins?" he asked with a trembling smile, you nodded "Oh! good good! Perhaps you could drop this off to cabin 9?" he referred to a box that was more disheveled than the others, a box full of wires, metal scraps, and you thought for a moment, You were already debating if you should go by cabin 9 earlier so why not? "Sure!, you seem to have a lot on your hands, figuratively and physically" You chuckled and grabbed the box with the sound of metals clanging into each other "God, Thank you!" He sighed and ran off to deliver other packages
The door creaked open and you stepped inside, Your skin was hit with a gentle warmth, Then you noticed Leo, Sitting on his desk a red pen on the side of his ear peaking through his wet curls from sweat, He was focused on his work, eyes narrowed as he used his tools with precision and skill. His arms were flexing under the strain of working, his muscles rippling with strength as he put his all into the job, like a sight for sore eyes, adding to the heat of the moment. Out of focus, You hazily dropped the box, missing the table it was supposed to land on, the metal scraps hitting the ground with a loud clash and startled you out of your day dreams "who's there?" he turned his head back, a smile curling on his face seeing how you quickly gathered the scraps back into the box. "What are you doing here?" He asked heading over to help you "Oh uhm-" Your breath hitched as you noticed the way his stained shirt was clinging onto him, showing off his muscles, You coughed, clearing your throat "I-i was just dropping off a package" You managed to utter out, cheeks red as a rose. He fake pouts "awh? so you weren't here to visit me?" he said fighting a smirk, You grew more flustered as he helped you off the ground "M'kidding Amor" He chuckled, God you despised that accent and the way it makes you shiver.
"Are you busy?" You asked, Going over to examine what he was working on his desk "Quite" He whispered, Towering over you from behind, his hands rested on your waist "Though.. I wouldn't mind a distraction" he smirked turning you over to face him, his hands grasped your waist and lifted you, You squirmed under his grip "Leo-" You screeched, then he brought you up to sit in his desk, whatever tools there was before, now dropping down on the ground with a thud. "warning please! god.." You groaned, and he laughed "M'sorry," The two of you close enough that your breath brushed his nose, He couldn't help but grin as he looked at you, those eyes seemed to lure you in with ease "You look pretty" Leo reached over to run his hands on your thigh, a shiver running through your spine as your cheeks turned flush red. Your legs subconsciously wrapped around his waist "I always do" You snickered, pulling him closer "Indeed.." he leaned forward, his hand on the edge of the desk for support and the other gently gripping your thigh "What do you suppose we do now?" He whispered near your ear, pressing a kiss to your jawline making you squirm.
"Well.." your breath deepened, as he traced circles on the side of your thigh "Mmm~ I'm listening" He hummed placing soft kissed on your neck, a gasp escaped your lips, Your fingers absent-mindedly run through his Damp hair "L-leo.. no.. we shouldn't" You sighed deeply, His eyes shut tight from the feeling, “mmm~ you’re right… we shouldn’t.” He mumbled before leaning down to whisper again, his breath hitting your neck with each syllable, “we shouldn’t… do this…. Without locking the door.” He grinned, Your eyes widened, and you lightly push him away hiding your flustered face "Relax, i was just teasing you" He giggled when you playfully hit him, and he pressed a soft 'innocent' kiss on your lips.
Requests!⚜️ Riordan verse Masterlist⚜️
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hotvintagepoll · 3 days
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Propaganda
Josephine Baker (The Siren of the Tropics, ZouZou)— Josephine Baker was an American born actress, singer, and utter icon of the period, creating the 1920s banana skirt look. She was the first black woman to star in a major motion film. She fought in the French resistance in WWII, given a Legion of Honour, as well as refusing to perform in segregated theatres in the US. She was bisexual, a fighter, and overall an absolutely incredible woman as well as being extremely attractive.
Anne Baxter (The Ten Commandments, All About Eve)—her soft, gentle voice in "all about eve", those gentle eyes with something odd behind them, the way she flips from Sweet Innocent to Viper on a dime......there was something Built Different about anne baxter, man, and it makes her so good for playing people who are Built Wrong. also one of my favorite batmen villains (her joint episode w vincent price is a delight) and of course I'm obsessed with her columbo episode where she bosses around edith head and does fabulous movie star things for no good reason. and i would be REMISS if i didn't mention her slink—oh the slink—in the ten commandments...................pardon me i must go think of sinning again
This is round 4 of the tournament. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. Please reblog with further support of your beloved hot sexy vintage woman.
[additional propaganda submitted under the cut.]
Josephine Baker:
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Black, American-born, French dancer and singer. Phenomenal sensation, took music-halls by storm. Famous in the silent film era.
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Let's talk La Revue Negre, Shuffle Along. The iconique banana outfit? But also getting a Croix de Guerre and full military honors at burial in Paris due to working with the Resistance.
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She exuded sex, was a beautiful dancer, vivacious, and her silliness and humor added to her attractiveness. She looked just as good in drag too.
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So I know she was more famous for other stuff than movies and her movies weren’t Hollywood but my first exposure to her was in her films so I’ve always thought of her as a film actress first and foremost. Also she was the first black woman to star in a major motion picture so I think that warrants an entry
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Iconic! Just look up anything about her life. She was a fascinating woman.
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Anne Baxter:
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The prettiest murderer in that film. Just so beautifully evil as Nefertari.
Anne Baxter was part of my Bisexual Awakening. My family has a tradition that every Palm Sunday we watch The ten commandments on TV together... And starting from a very young age, I essentially developed a crushes on Anne Baxter's Nefertiri & Yul Brynner's Ramses. Dude, the woman was HOT! They both were! My crush definitely wasn't helped by the fact that Anne Baxter's costumes were a bit on the sheer side. She had a way of capturing you with her eyes, and I never understood why Charlton heston's Moses didn't just have a threesome with Nefertiri and Ramses. LOL
Her Nefertiri in The Ten Commandments was FORMATIVE TO ME. If not the hottest old movie lady, then she definitely played the hottest old movie character. if that makes sense.
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Look. Listen. I only *just* discovered her on a post from the Have You Seen This Romcom poll blog. Saw she had the same last name as me and went OOH hi hello. Went to her IMdB and saw she was born in Indiana like moi. I am now even more intrigued. Been eagerly telling my partner this, and he was like "maybe you guys are distantly related?" And after 2 hrs of going down the tumblr tag + her imdb photos, I'm In Deep(tm) and I can't stop looking at her like 😍 When I go to my grandma's house, bet your ass I'm gonna check my grandpa's genealogy and see if we're somehow related. Sorry that's not really propaganda I just got real excited, esp when I saw that the submission deadline was extended (bless your soul). Narrowing down the movies where she's hottest in was Hell tyvm. I've only just discovered her, she looks gorgeous to me in every movie still I see of her gdi lol.
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seat-safety-switch · 2 days
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One of the beautiful things about the internet is that you can always find someone to argue with you. No matter how innocent the subject, there is going to be a wackadoo who flies off the handle and gets super mad at you for something you may not even have said. If you have the right mindset about it, it's a great educational experience.
For instance, a couple weeks ago I signed up for a local building architect's forum. In order to endear myself to the group so I could begin pumping them for information on low-mileage used Saabs, I posted some innocent stuff about how elevators were and are better than escalators. Just drum up some engagement, get the old posting humours flowing, as you do. I didn't think it would be controversial. If escalators were so good, then you'd see high-rise buildings using them instead of the little vertical cars that make everyone happy. Ding!
What I didn't count on was the fact that some people have dedicated their entire lives to escalators. Being complex machines that are important for safe operation, there is a cult of operators who know them inside and out. They breathe them. They love them. Escalators pay their bills, and escalators are all they really care about. It's that lack of perspective, I think, which is what got us off on a bad foot.
What I really didn't count on was that this was the final break in the uneasy peace between the Elevator People and the Escalator People, who often worked at the same company or in the same building. I had unwittingly committed the world to another brutal war, fought in the shadows, except this time among a bunch of grease-stained maintenance experts who were tired of the way that The Other Interior Transport Mechanism Guys sneered at them from across a crowded mall food court. And it was time to do something about it.
All I can say about the resulting bloody battle is that I'm really glad I live in a house that has regular-ass stairs. Wait, now I've done it. Someone with a firepole fetish is going to be by any second to scream directly at me, nonstop, for several hours until they pass out.
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auteurdelabre · 1 day
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A LITTLE SUN PART 7 (part II) Dieter Bravo x f!Reader
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rating: 18+
tags: SMUT. Penetration, Oral (m and f receiving), use of 'daddy' (but you ain't into it), use of 'baby', Dieter being Dieter, fluff, like such tooth-rotting sweetness its almost gross, idiots in love, pregnancy, talk of pregnancy body changes/self esteem, love love love, family issues, mentions of parental death.
a/n: Tumblr is dumb and won't let me post the entire chapter in one post. ARGH. So below is part two.
HERE IS PART ONE OF THIS CHAPTER.
series masterlist
Your mother is pacing around the kitchen when the doorbell rings. With a muttered grumble she strides to the front door, tugging it open with a flourish. She expects to see her pregnant daughter there, what she doesn’t expect is a six foot movie star she hates to be flinching at her.
He’s wearing a short sleeved linen shirt, freshly pressed slacks and his usually unruly hair has been combed neatly.  He even got Magda to trim his beard for him. He wants to make a good impression.
"Hi," Dieter says, his stomach churning anxiously as your mother stares him down. "I'm Dieter-"
"I know exactly who you are," the woman snaps, arms crossing over her front. "What do you want? I’m afraid I don't have any more daughters for you to buy babies from."
She tries to look around his broad shoulders. "Where is my daughter by the way?"
Dieter shuffles back and forth, his expensive dress shoes scraping the ground. Suddenly all his bravado has left him and he feels much like a chastised child. 
"I wanted to talk to you," Dieter explains. "Just you and me if that’s okay?"
Your mother's brows knit angrily. "So she couldn't even be bothered-"
"She doesn't know I'm here," Dieter interjects.
He goes to say something more when he thinks he notices a car slowing down up the block. Paparazzi. Your mother notices as well because she ushers Dieter into the house, closing the door behind him sharply. 
"You have five minutes." 
Dieter slips off his shoes and follows her to the couch, about to launch into his speech when he sniffs the air.
"Are you baking?"
"Cinnamon bread. My daughters favorite," your mother says, eyes misting. She regards Dieter a moment, softening. "Would you like a piece?" 
"I'd love one." 
He takes a seat on the couch as ordered, watching as your mother brings out a tray holding several slices of cinnamon bread, a tea pot and two mugs.
“This is so fuc- darn delicious,” Dieter corrects himself, wiping the crumbs from his fingers on his pants, much to your mother’s dismay. “I love it.”
Your mother offers a small grunt by way of reply, watching him eat and taking small sips of her tea. Dieter notices you both hold your cups the same way, forefinger and pinky slightly out. It makes him long for you, wishing you were here with him as he attempts this conversation.
But you can’t be, he knows you’re too stubborn for it. Judging by how your mother is looking at him now, it’s a familial trait.
“I wanted to come over and try to explain things.”
“There’s nothing to explain,” your mother snaps, her teacup placed on the coffee table. “You and my daughter made a baby, she’s selling it to you and she never told me.”
"I'm sorry it was a secret for so long,” Dieter says. “It's just because of my notoriety that we had to keep it under wraps.”
“From the world, I understand, but from her own mother?” She shakes her head. “Do you know how hurtful that is? To find out your only child is pregnant because of the tabloids? To think you’re going to be a grandmother and then find out she’s selling the baby off?”
“She signed an NDA," Dieter explains with a wince, knowing how awful it sounds. "I'm so sorry. She hated to do it. It was my fault."
"And your mother?" Your mom huffs. "I bet she knew she was going to be a grandma before the tabloids di-"
She breaks off, irritated when she sees the hollow look in Dieters eyes.
"My uh, my mom isn't alive," Dieter says, fingers tapping anxiously at his side. "She died when I was in my twenties."
"Your father?"
Dieter shakes his head, wincing. Your fierce mother immediately softens her tone, her shoulders lowering.
“I’m sorry to hear that.”
“You shouldn’t be sorry to me about anything,” Dieter says in a soft rasp. “I’m the one who you should be mad at. Not your daughter.”
Your mother wraps her arms around herself. "How is she?"
"Hurt. She misses you."
"Must not miss me much. She's made no attempt to call."
"She's worried about what you'll say. Your opinion matters so much to her, you know that. Especially with her dad gone."
Your mother swallows. "They were so similar. So stubborn and..."
Suddenly the dam behind the woman's eyes breaks and Dieter watches her face crumple. 
"I just wish he was here," she says, shoulders shaking. Dieter feels his own eyes filling with tears, his heart aching in tandem. He can't help but reach out and cover her hand with his. 
"I’m so sorry."
"If he was here he would know exactly what to say," your mother continues, allowing his hand to remain over hers. "Michael could always get through to her when I couldn't."
“My mom knew me in a way my dad never did,” Dieter offers after a moment. “Knew exactly the right thing to say at the right time. It’s hard not having that. But you still have time with your daughter. Time that’s wasting with you two being mad at each other.”
Your mother blinks up at Dieter, a slow understanding reflected in her swimming eyes. As if she’s seeing him properly for the first time. He continues on, encouraged that it’s been over five minutes and she hasn’t kicked him out yet.
“And I know you think this whole thing with the baby is a spontaneous decision and that I’m massively immature and yeah, I can be. But you need to know that when your daughter told me she was pregnant it was the best day of my life," Dieter says, his voice thick with emotion.
He takes a moment, swallowing and blinking furiously. His hand tightens around your mothers’.  
“But I’m not that guy anymore. I’ve changed. She’s changed me, my son has changed me. I’m not perfect, but I also don’t think there’s anyone in the world that will love your da—grandson more than me.”
Your mother blinks rapidly, her weathered face softening further. “My grandson?”
“If you want him to be,” Dieter explains, suddenly unsure. “If your daughter is okay with it. I don’t have any parents in my life. It would be nice for him to have a grandmother.”
Any lingering distaste your mother may have held for Dieter is wiped away in that moment. The sincerity in his wide dark eyes and the nervous way he twists the rings on his fingers endears her further.
“And I know you’re upset with her about all of this but I promise I’ll take care of her for the rest of her life,” Dieter finishes, his eyes glassy. “Even if she’s in Sacramento doing school. Even if she never wants to see me or our son. I want to make her happy and that means taking care of you too. The house is paid for; your daughter will be taken care of.”
Your mother’s hands move from under Dieter’s to over, clasping his wide hands tightly. She has a gentle smile on her face now, the anger gone from her voice.
“I thank you Dieter. That is a kindness that touches my heart. Knowing I can remain in the same house I raised my family in means more to me than you realize. But it wasn’t your place to do it.”
“I know.”
“I can’t accept it.”
“Please,” Dieter begs with his big brown eyes so round and sorrowful your mother has to blink back a new onslaught of tears. “She’s giving me the world. The rest of your mortgage is nothing in comparison to that.”
Your mother can’t help but laugh out loud at the earnestness in his expression. He grins crookedly as she laughs, wiping tears from her lash line. He waits until she sobers, shaking her head with a small smile on her face.
“Alright, I accept it. But only if you’ll let me cook you dinner every once in a while.”
“And cinnamon bread?”
“And cinnamon bread,” your mother says laughing again.  “As for taking care of my daughter? That is something you’ll have to take up with her. But be warned she’s even more stubborn than me.”
“Don’t I know it,” Dieter grins shyly, causing the two of them to chuckle between themselves softly.
“I’ll call her,” your mother says resolutely. “I need to apologize and tell her she can move back home if she wants.”
Dieter immediately stiffens. He hadn’t thought about this part.
"Actually if its okay I want her to stay with me until the baby is born," Dieter explains, curls falling into his eyes, his mannerisms anxious. "I like having my son nearby."
"And perhaps having my daughter nearby too?" Your mother peers into his face with a small curl of her lips.  “You care for her. More than a boss for an employee. Or a father for a surrogate.”
Dieter looks overcome for the moment, his dark eyes on the floor. He doesn’t know how to respond.
“That’s between you two,” your mother acknowledges. “It’s not my place to say anything.”
Before Dieter can say anything in reply he hears the sound of a frantic key turning in the lock and the front door is thrust open. 
The two of them whip their heads in the direction of the front door to see you stumbling into the house, slamming the door behind you. Your hair is wild, your face flushed and you look extremely pissed off. You look at the two of them on the couch and your brows knit.
“What the fuck is going on here?”
"How did-"
"Magda," you answer before Dieter can finish the question. "Why the fuck are you here at my house with my mom?"
You watch as your mom rises from the couch next to Dieter. Her eyes are wet and when she gazes at your very full stomach she gives a soft little gasp. 
"Honey-"
"Don't honey me," you snap, feeling angry tears welling in your eyes as you glare over at Dieter. "Let's go, Dieter."
"Baby, wait-" Dieter starts, pausing only when you whip back around to fix him with a leveling glare.
He looks so sorrowful standing there between you and your equally broken-looking mother that you find yourself relenting. You have an idea on why he’s here and even if it wasn’t his place you can’t deny that it was kind of him to try.
"Go wait in the kitchen, please."
Dieter opens his mouth to suggest something else but the glint to your eyes has him slamming it shut and nodding. You wait until he's shuffled into the next room before looking back at your mother. 
"Baby?" Your mom ventures gently. 
"He calls everyone that," you lie. 
She nods slowly but you know she doesn't believe you. Your mother also knows you well enough that she doesn’t attempt to sway you.
"Here, come take a seat," she offers motioning to the couch. "Your ankles must be swollen."
You lift a surprised brow but you waddle over to her, settling into the seat with an exhale. You look at Dieter’s leftover cinnamon bread crumbs and frown. How long was he here for? You look back to your mother, shocked at her gentle countenance. You’d expected anger or frustration, instead you see only regret.
"How did you know about the ankles?"
"I was the same when I was pregnant with you," she says coming to sit on the other end of the couch. "I carried high like you as well."
"Really?" You absently drape your fingers over the curve of your stomach.
"Oh yes," your mother smiles, eyeing your bump.
As you sit there discussing this with shy smiles you wish that this pregnancy was normal. That you had a husband and excited family that threw you a baby shower for a child you'd be able to bring home and care for at the end of it all. 
You wish your mom felt comfortable to place her hands on your stomach and to care for this little boy you carry. But she’s holding back her emotions, not wanting to get attached.
After several moments your mom shuffles closer to you on the couch, her hand coming to cup not your stomach, but your cheek.
“I’m sorry,” your mom says, and you’re shocked at the tears pooling in her eyes. “I never wanted… I just… I acted shamefully.”
“I don’t understand why,” you explain, chin wobbling. “We’ve always had a great relationship. Or I thought we did.”
“I thought we did too,” your Mom acknowledges. “But considering you kept this a secret I think I might have done something wrong along the way. You never should have been afraid to come to me with this.”
You don’t know how to answer that.
“You won’t understand until you’re a -” you mom catches herself. “A parent provides for their children, not the other way around. I felt ashamed that you felt you needed to take care of me.”
For a moment you look at her not as your mother, but as a woman. A tired woman who sacrificed so much to see you taken care of and your heart cracks. 
“I like taking care of you Mom,” you explain, swallowing the tears there. “I love you. You’re all I have left. Fighting with you these past few weeks has been awful.”
“I know honey,” your mom says and now she pulls you into her arms, rocking you as if you were still that child who ran to her with a scraped knee or boy troubles. “I’m so sorry, please forgive me.”
“Of course I do,” you say, burying your face in her shoulder as you let the tears flow. For the first time since your father died the two of you cry together, arms wrapped around one another, your son nestled between the two of you. Finally sniffling you pull back, wiping at your eyes.
“Were you mean to Dieter?”
“Tried to be,” your mother replies with a grin. “Impossible to be though. He’s very sweet.”
“He’s been amazing through this whole thing,” you answer honestly, feeling the need to sing his praises to the woman who usually derides him. “He’s been the most supportive, caring version of himself I’ve ever seen. Sober, sweet and I love being around him.”
Your mother’s eyes search yours intensely, so much that you blink wondering what she’s looking for.  Her gaze breaks when a shy Dieter knocks on the wall separating the two rooms.
“Uh, is it okay if I come in?”
Your mother laughs. “We’ll come to you. My daughter needs some cinnamon bread.”
The two of you stand, your mom helping you before letting her hand fall briefly to your swollen belly. You watch her face beaming as she does before her eyes go to yours.
“My baby having a baby,” she murmurs.
The two of you enter into the kitchen hand in hand. Dieter is standing by the sink, his hair even more wild than usual. He was obviously running his hands through it anxiously.
Dieter approaches you both slowly, as if he’s concerned one of you will be furious. When he sees the easy smile in both of your faces and your clasped hands he feels the tightness in his chest release.
“Thank you, Dieter,” you tell him gently as he approaches. He doesn’t push it, doesn’t ask you to elaborate. He just nods his head, smiling and coming to stand next to you. Your mother releases your hand, coming to stand in front of you both.
“Now you can retire,” Dieter offers with a hopeful look in your mother’s direction.
“No,” your mom says shortly, drawing both sets of eyes her way. You feel yourself deflate, closing your eyes for a steadying moment. You can’t stand the cruelty she’s still holding in her heart for Dieter after everything.
“Mom-“
“No, I like my job,” your mother tells Dieter, ignoring you. She comes to stand in front of him, having to look up due to her short stature. “I enjoy it. So I won’t retire. But I will work less and try to enjoy more of my life.”
You both break into easy grins.
“Yes ma’am.”
Your mother’s smile dims a fraction as she gazes between the two of you.
“Dieter has offered me a chance to be the baby’s grandmother,” your mother says quietly. “But that will be your decision my love. I won’t do anything that you’re uncomfortable with.”
You swallow. “Do you want to be his grandmother? Even if I’m not in the picture? Even if we have no legal right?”
“I would,” your mother replies without hesitation. You turn your head to face the taller man to your left.
“And you’re really okay with it, Dieter?”
“More than okay.”
Dieter’s eyes are on the ground, suddenly overwhelmed with emotions. He wishes his own mother was here, wishes she could have met you. He knows that she would have loved you.
“Then I’m okay with it,” you murmur.
He’s so grateful that his baby will have a grandmother. Even if you want nothing to do with him he’ll forever have this tie to you.
Your mother glances over at Dieter before stepping towards him. 
"Let me see your face," your mother demands cupping Dieter's stubbled cheeks in her hands and forcing his eyes to hers. A few quiet minutes pass, their eyes in silent communion before you see both sets watering.
You watch in shock as your mother leans forward and in an act so naturally maternal kisses Dieter's forehead gently.
"You're a good man," she tells him gently. "A good man who acts silly sometimes."
When tears slip down Dieter’s cheeks you feel your jaw drop.  Your mother pulls him into a tight hug, rocking him as they stand, murmuring something into his wild hair. You breathe unsteadily when his own arms go to wrap around her waist, clinging to her. He looks like a lost boy finding harbor in the embrace of his mother, his shoulders shaking gently as she soothes him in her arms.
She looks over at you, smiling gently. She tugs you over into her arms as well and before long the three of you are embracing standing in the middle of your mom's messy kitchen.
"Will you two stay for dinner?" Your mother asks eyes hopeful when the three of you break apart, all sets of eyes glassy.  
"That would be so great," Dieter says excitedly before you can answer, rubbing at his wet eyes. He wants to take advantage of being in your home. He wants to see where you grew up, where you exist when you're not with him. 
"You're Chilean right?"
"Part, yeah."
"Right, I'm going to pop out to the market," your mom says with a wide grin as she picks up her car keys. "I'll be back in a flash."
Your mother is gone excitedly out the door before you can even process what’s happening. That you’re having dinner with your boss and your mom and your unborn child. It’s all a bit much. And yet the thought warms you.
“So do I get a tour?”
“Sure,” you say grinning. Without thought you take his hand, guiding him through the hall pointing out the rooms, giving small synopsis like “this is where I was standing when my first boyfriend called and broke up with me” and “this is where I fell in the tub and cracked my tooth”
“And you know my bedroom,” you tell him with a smirk. “Very acquainted with the closet, I believe.”
He grins before taking his time looking around your room. Last time he’d been in a rush, but today he looks at everything. He sees the framed photo of you on horseback, the science ribbons for first and second place. He notices a trophy for high school tennis. He grins at the poster of Cillian Murphy behind your door. He sees the Polaroid’s of you and your friends stuck to your mirror.
“You never mention your friends,” Dieter observes pointing at the photo. “How come?”
“I never see them,” you shrug coming over to peer at them. “They all got married, had kids. I was in school and then I was working and we kind of just lost touch.”
“Do you miss them?”
“Honestly? Sometimes. But school and my career just always seemed more important.”
“You don’t think you could have both? A career and a family?”
“Not really,” you shake your head. “Can’t have it all.”
“Why not?”
“I dunno,” you shrug again. “Something has to give.”
“Only if you have a shit partner,” Dieter offers.
Before you can say anything more he’s gone to your bookshelf, looking at the tomes that reside there and muttering their titles under his breath. You watch him just existing in this room, before your reason for rushing over here affronts you.
“Did you pay off my Mom’s mortgage?”
“Yeah,” Dieter replies after a beat, twisting to face you. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.”
You stare at Dieter as he says this, the passion in his voice overwhelming you. Since when was this his plan? You’re supposed to take the three hundred grand and go.
“Why do that? You knew I was going to do it.”
“I wanted that money to be for you,” Dieter explains. “Not taking care of the mortgage and everything else. I’d pay for your school too but something tells me you’d refuse that.”
“Correct.”
“Your mother was right, you are stubborn.”
This gets a shocked laugh out of you. “What else did you two talk about?”
“That’s between her and me,” he says with a supercilious look on his face. “I think she might like me better than you at this point.”
Affection swims through your limbs and it carries you to him. Without warning your hands go to his shoulders, mouth pressing gently to his. He accepts this eagerly, his wet tongue dabbing against yours gently.
"Thank you," you whisper against his full mouth. "But you don't have to take care of me."
"I like taking care of you," Dieter murmurs, his nose tracing yours. "You spent so long taking care of me and everyone else; let me take care of you now."
You nod; kissing him again and feeling him slowly back you towards your bed.
“Mia,” you remind him.
“Its fine,” he assures you, hands tugging at the hem of your shirt.
“I’m not going to sleep with you when you’re in a relationship, Dieter.”
“I’m not,” he promises you, “I swear.”
You want to press him for more information. But more than that, you just want Dieter. You need to be as close to him as possible. You need to feel his bare skin on yours, inhale the crook of his neck, taste his lips.
And when he gently urges you onto your back in your childhood bed you don't fight him. You allow him to bring down your shorts and panties and even though you can't see anything other than his hair over your belly you can't stop the gasp that escapes you when his mouth begins to work over your core.  
Moments later after you've come spectacularly for him, groaning out his name with your thighs quivering against his ears and your hands fisting through his hair, he crawls up next to you on the bed. 
He traces over your abdomen, his dark eyes ever widened in wonder as he feels his son underneath his palm. Sunlight filters in through your bedroom window, giving him a haloed effect as he gazes down at you, his mouth swollen and damp.
"I don't know how I'm going to go back to normal life," you smile sleepily as you run a finger along his lower lip. "After being spoiled by Dieter Bravo school is sure going to pale in comparison." 
Dieter keeps the smile frozen on his face but inside his stomach drops.  Your schooling is going to start soon. He’s going to be separated from you. He feels his sons foot kick him and you both giggle. At least he’ll have this part of you.
He helps you into your panties and shorts before your mother returns shortly after. If she notices your flushed cheeks and Dieters extra mussed hair she doesn't comment on it. 
"I cheated," your mom says with a mischievous little smile that Dieter thinks looks identical to yours as she hands you both your plates when you come to sit at the dining table. "There's a wonderful Latin restaurant in town. They make the best palta." 
The food is just as good as she made it seem. Between the palta and the Estofado and variety of empanadas you’re quickly overwhelmed with taste. You take your time savoring it though, making a note to try more Chilean food in the future.
“So I guess I’ll move back tomorrow,” you say after a hot bite of your stew. “I only have the two suitcases.”
Nothing about moving back appeals to you, aside from seeing your mother on a regular basis. You know for a fact that being away from Dieter will hurt, but perhaps that’s for the best. You need to separate yourself from this silly fantasy.
"You can move back here at any time my love," your mom enthuses before casting a quick look at Dieter's downturned face. "But I think it would be best if you stayed at Dieter's. He has all that space and a pool and that chef-"
"But I don't like to think of you here all by yourself," you insist.
"Honey, don't worry about me. I lived with your father and then you for over thirty five years. I need a break."
You sputter a surprised laugh at this. This whole time you had been painting your mother as this sad tragic figure, when really she's a woman coming into her own just as much as you are. You swallow your mouthful, eyes darting to the man at your left.
"Is it okay if I stay at your place a little longer, Dieter?"
"Of course," Dieter enthuses through a mouthful of avocado. "I told you, stay as long as you like. And now your Mom can come visit whenever she likes."
You smile at this, holding in the urge to kiss him.
When Dieter rests his arm on the back of your chair during the rest of dinner you don't even register it happening. When his fingertips absently trace your upper arm as he listens to your mom talking about her job you don't notice. 
But your mom notices. She notices it all.
On the drive back home your mind is a muddle of things. But mostly your heart swells with the knowledge that Dieter, a man you always thought was chronically selfish did this for you at no gain for himself.
"You didn't have to do that for me," you tell him as you walk back into Dieter’s home a short while later. He’s quiet with a faraway look in his eyes.  
"I know. I just wanted to help."
The two of you are heading to the kitchen, about to put away the leftovers your mother insisted on sending home with you. Dieter takes them from your hands with a soft “I got it” before popping them in the fridge.
Dieter had always struck you as self-centered, the entire time you worked for him. From the flippant way he spoke to people in the industry he disliked, to the cavalier attitude towards other PA’s.
But right now all you can think of is the way he's continually showed up for you. The way he supports you in not only this pregnancy but your schooling, your family, your goals. You see a change in him, one that takes your breath away.
“Dieter?”
“Yeah?”
He sees your eyes and the way they go dark the longer you stare at him. The desire is so clear in your expression.  
He crosses the room and his mouth comes to yours, petal soft. He sighs, hands coming to either side of your neck, thumbs propped against your jaw. You lean into the kiss, your belly sandwiched between the two of you.
"Take me to bed, Dieter."
Dieter doesn't hesitate, his arm bands around your waist guiding you to the bedroom. 
He takes his time undressing you, kissing every part of your flesh he uncovers. He kisses the stretch marks on your belly, and he caresses the extra flesh that pads your body with a reverence that makes you teary.
Your stomach is getting too large for missionary so he sweetly urges you to roll onto your side, not doing anything until you’re comfortable. Only then does he makes sweet and gentle love to you, your head on his arm as he fills you slowly, watching the way your body responds to him.
He holds you delicately at first, not wanting to be too rough. But you’re eager, so fucking eager, and your hand goes to his hip, urging him to go harder, to go faster.
“You’re so beautiful,” he whispers, your thigh over his, your body slowly being pumped into by him. You’re arching, whimpering his name as he holds you against him. Every stroke feels like adoration, every graze of his fingers against your clit feels like more than just desire.
“I need to hear you come, baby,” he murmurs, his nose running along your temple. You turn your face to him, kissing him gently as his thrusts deepen, his lips hot and needy.
“Wanna come for you,” you gasp, your body starting to clench around him tighter and tighter before your head is tilted back against his throat as you cry his name. Your body spasms as arousal coats his cock still buried within you.
“So good for me, so fucking good,” Dieter groans, his thrusts becoming erratic. Before long his eyes roll back and he’s emptying himself into you, hands gripping your chest and cunt, needing you as close as possible.
Slowly your breathing slows and you both grow drowsy. But before you fall asleep you roll until you’re facing him. He looks so beautiful staring back at you with sleepy eyes and his curls spread out on his pillow.
You kiss him gently, hand at his collar before pulling back.
"Dieter, I think you're gonna make an amazing father."
Something about the sincerity in your voice moves him to tears that he has to blink back. He draws you closer to him under the duvet, needing the warmth of your skin, the closeness of your body.
"Do you really mean that?"
"Every word."
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Dieter is on a unicorn floaty, half dozing in the late morning sunshine when you ask him.
"Dieter, will you tell me about your mom?"
It comes out of nowhere one day in the pool. You're half stretched out on a purple pool noodle, your lower half submerged in the clear water as you kick lazily. Dieter turns his head when you ask him. 
"What about her?"
You shift on your pool noodle, getting comfortable. "What was she like?"
Dieter takes a moment to compose his thoughts. His lower lip tends to stick out when he does it. 
"Funny. Smart. Dramatic like me." Dieter grins. "She died when I was in my early twenties and sometimes I wanna be furious about all the time I didn't get to spend with her. But then I count myself lucky I had two decades." 
You don't say much to that. You don't know why but you crave more knowledge about Dieter that isn't surface level. You crave more from him, almost like you need to know him better than anyone. 
"She's the one who encouraged me to go into acting," Dieter continues. "She worked two jobs so she could pay for my acting classes."
"Really?" 
"Yeah. She was so excited when I got the scholarship to RADA," Dieter says dragging his hand through the water. 
"She sounds amazing."
"She would have loved you," Dieter says before he can stop himself. For some reason this comment causes your heart to flip. 
He looks momentarily lost in thought before turning his gaze to you. His eyes scan the freckles starting on your shoulders, the light that shines in your hair. He's dazzled for a moment before he remembers that he wanted to ask you something. 
 "What about you? What was your dad like?" 
A little smile breaks out over your features. You rarely talk about your father but right now all that comes to you are good memories. 
"Smart. Scary smart actually. Like, every time we played wheel of Fortune he'd guess it within like the first two letters," you laugh gently. "He was the first person I told about my Masters program. The first person I told about a lot of stuff. He was always my cheerleader." 
"Sounds like a great dad."
"He loved your movies," you say, kicking your feet in the water gently. "He made me sit through a Cliff Beasts marathon one year for his birthday."
Dieter almost falls off his floaty in shock. 
"No shit. Really?"
"Yeah," you give a giggle before turning a bit reserved. "He and your mom would have gotten along, I think.”
"Bet they would have been the most amazing grandparents," Dieter says in a faraway voice.
"Definitely."
Dieter shifts in the unicorn, causing it to squeak. His sunglasses are slid back up his nose and he grows somber. 
"You must be excited about starting school again," Dieter says tightly hoping the disapproval in his voice isn't obvious.
He looks over at you when you don't reply right away. You look conflicted, almost guilty as you glide a hand through the water in front of you. 
"Sometimes I wonder if I'm continuing on with school and everything because that's what I was doing when my dad died," you offer solemnly. 
"Are you?"
"Not sure. When he died I thought it was such a natural next step to use my biology background and go into research." A niggle of doubt is there at the back of your head. "But I'm not sure that's what I want anymore."
"So you might not go back?"
Dieter hopes the eagerness in his voice isn't too obvious. 
"I don't know," you answer honestly before sliding off the pool noodle and paddling in place. "I'm tired. I think I'm gonna have a nap."
Dieter watches you walk up the steps of the pool, ass twitching as you grab a towel and head into the main house. But that's not what causes the grin to start on his face.  
You're not sure about going back to school. 
There's hope. 
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"Just this once," Dieter murmurs, his teeth skating along your pulse point. "C'mon baby." 
You’re on all fours, your stomach supported by a variety of pillows. Dieter is behind you, hands on your hips, his body tilting over yours. It’s a Saturday night and he’s just got back from a particularly boring table read.
His hands found yours without question when he got home not long ago, pulling you along with him to bed and whispering into your ear the one thing he’s wanted to hear since he got you pregnant.
You sigh heavily, eyes closed as he sinks into you.
"Please make me come… Daddy.” 
Dieter groans lowly in his throat, his cock driving into you deeply. You're too overwhelmed by the sensation to be turned off by the honorific. And if he’d just left it at that, you could have continued without further distraction.
But Dieter is completely turned on by the expression, his hands coming to hold yours to the mattress as he tilts his mouth to your temple.
"Yeah, you made me a Daddy," Dieter breathes against your ear as he thrusts. "You like that? Huh? Daddy fucking you?" 
“Not at all,” you cringe, unable to help yourself from laughing. The entire ‘Daddy’/‘Mommy’ thing has never turned you on.  “I hate it worse than baby mama.”
Dieter sighs, his motions slowing. "C'mon."
"It's creepy," you tell him. "I don't like the Daddy thing."
"Fine," Dieter grumbles as his motions slow further. "Just wanted a little dirty talk is all."
Dieter’s thrusting has gone from staccato-ed to completely still. You glance over your shoulder at him with your brows raised. His cheeks are red, he’s embarrassed. Dieter rarely gets embarrassed like this and you find it completely endearing.
 “I was just trying to have a little fun,” Dieter pouts, about to pull out of you.
“Hey hey, I like fun,” you tell him, wrapping your hand around the back of his neck so he can’t leave in a huff. You start to push back against his length, gratified when you hear him give a muffled whimper into your shoulder.
“Like maybe you tie me up sometime?”
“You’d let me do that?” Dieter asks in awe, his cock slipping further into you. You groan at the sensation, arm dropping as you gain purchase on the mattress once more. His thrusting is increasing in tempo again, stoking that pleasured spot within you.
“Yeah,” you breathe softly. “Yeah, I would.”
And you mean it. You’ve never done it with anyone else, but you would with Dieter. He doesn’t do things harsh and cruel. He touches you reverently. You trust him. “I’d let you tie my wrists and ankles,” you tell him, body arching as he continues to thrust. “Let you have your way with me.”
Dieter gives a guttural choke at the very thought of it. You tied up, spread eagle on his bed so he could go down on you for hours. Pulling delicious fucking noises from you as you writhe for him.
“Would you want that?” you tease, knowing very well he would.  “Having me at your mercy, Dieter?  Fucking me exactly how you want?”
“Yes,” Dieter almost shouts, “fuck yes I would. Please…. Fuck I…”
His forehead dips to your shoulder blade as he pulls you back and forth against his length, jutting his hips forward. You feel so good, so silken and tight and perfect and he can’t believe this is happening. That you’ve fallen into this comfortably rhythm of give and take. That you can be vulnerable with him like this.
“How would you fuck me?” you ask, feeling your climax approaching. “Tell me, Dieter, I’m so close.”
“Would eat you out for hours. Wouldn’t…. wouldn’t be able to help myself,” Dieter grunts, his cock quickly pressing into you over and over. “Then I’d turn you over...a-and I’d tie your wrists together, mmmph…. And I’d…I’d-“
Dieter doesn’t get to finish that thought because he feels you hit your peak, whining out his name as you climax. Dieter feels your cunt milking his cock and his voice croaks out some garbled gibberish as he empties himself into you.
You fall asleep not long after that, your naked body glowing in the moonlight like some goddess of myth. He realizes he would do anything to keep you like this. Happy and sated and with him.
But mostly, he wants you to want him. 
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"You said you got into RADA right?"
"Yeah, but I didn't go," Dieter says as he goes over his latest script suggestion from his agent. "Got a reoccurring part in a soap opera a few weeks before I was starting and then the first Cliff Beasts and then, well, you know the rest."
"Do you still have your audition tape?" 
"It's on YouTube. Some asshole uploaded it when I got nominated for my Oscar."
"Really? Can we watch it?"
"Knock yourself out."
Dieter watches you waddle to the tv room, excitedly bringing YouTube up on the television and typing Dieter Bravo RADA audition. 
You sit on the couch, looking eagerly up at the screen. A very fresh-faced Dieter pops up. 
"Oh my gosh you're so young!" You say with a girlish giggle. "So weird to see you without a beard."
Dieter can't help but casually make his way over to the couch, plopping down next to you and watching his younger self. 
"Hi my name is Dieter Bravo and I would like to submit myself for acceptance into your program," the young Dieter says, eyes bright and smile big. "Today I'll be performing Gloumov’s monologue from The Diary of a Scoundrel” by Alexander Ostrovsky."
"Your voice is so different."
The young Dieter positions himself slightly to the left of the screen. 
"Barely out of puberty." Dieter casts a critical eye over his formerly svelte frame. "And about fifty pounds lighter."
"I like how you look now," you answer honestly. "More manly."
Before Dieter can accept that compliment his younger self is starting the scene. 
"Look into my eyes. Can’t you see there that I’d rather die than cause you a moment’s pain?"
Young Dieter takes a moment, his dark eyes beguiling as he stares into the camera, overcome, before continuing. And there on the screen You see the same transformation that you saw back on set in Ireland. Where Dieter becomes the character. 
"Oh, if you only knew how many times your sweet, gentle smile has stopped me on the very brink of impropriety," the young Dieter pauses, his eyes shiny. 
"But even that day when I forgot myself, you didn’t turn me from the house! Oh, my God, what happiness you’ve given me. What happiness, what happiness!"
A tear is shining on young Dieter's cheek as he gives a soft smile into the camera, a look of relief on his face. 
"Holy shit," you breathe, eyes wide. "Dieter that was ... Really good."
"You sound surprised."
"Well I guess ... I've only really seen you in the Cliff Beasts movies. I didn't know you could, you know, act-act."
"You thought I won an Oscar for having a great personality?"
You give him a playful shove as Dieter's younger self comes back to the screen. 
"Thank you for your time. Hope I see you in the fall."
Dieter plucks the remote from the coffee table about to change it to something less him. He tires of seeing his face on televisions and phones and sides of buses. 
Something captures his attention though, one of the suggested videos on the right. 
"Hmmm, there's a video on home births," Dieter says as he navigates the screen. "Wanna watch? Might prep us."
"Sure."
Thirty minutes later Dieter pauses the television, both of you sitting shell-shocked next to one another. 
"That was a terrible idea."
"I agree."
The camera had captured everything. In HD detail. Up close. Including a very vivid image of a baby crowning.
"That's what's gonna happen to me?" You say in a high pitched voice, struggling to your feet. "I can't do that!"
You've been reading books ever since the strip turned pink, but actually seeing it is totally different.
"A little late for that," Dieter says from the couch watching you begin to pace back and forth in front of the television. 
"That was disgusting," you say with a particularly aggressive jab of your finger towards the television. "Did you know about the placenta? It's like I have to give birth twice!"
"At least it's not twins," Dieter offers weakly. He doesn't miss the irritation that flashes in your eyes. 
"Should we watch the rest?"
"Your call," Dieter shrugs. You take a moment, looking at the television paused on a serious looking doctor. 
You take your seat next to Dieter once more. "Okay. I'm ready."
Twelve minutes later the movie is shut off indefinitely.
"An episiotomy?" You practically shriek before leaving the room. "If that happens I'm charging you extra, Bravo!"
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Your mother starts to come over weekly for coffee. The first time she does you show her the nursery. She's all smiles and wet eyes as she walks around the space. You know she's marveling at the high-end designer items, the impossibly soft sheets and ornately carved crib. You never grew up with expensive things like that. 
When the two of you make your way into the kitchen and you make her a coffee she smiles up at you. 
"Dieter told me about the charity he's thinking of creating."
You almost drop the espresso cup that you're holding. "You talk with Dieter?"
"Of course," she nods. "He calls me to update me on the baby and texts the odd photo every now and again."
"What?!"
You're struck dumb by this. Your mother barely texts you, and now she's best friends with your boss? She smiles at your discomfiture.  But you’re blown away, and a little irritated since you also send your mom updates via email almost daily when she’s not here for her weekly (decaf) coffee checkups and snuggles.
"You fit right in here."
"I'm just part of the scenery until the baby gets here" you smile pouring her the coffee and sliding the mug towards her across the counter. "Then it's back to school and on my way to a PhD for research."
You slice up the carrot cake that Petra made for your visit (along with your help), sliding a plate to your mother and taking one for yourself.
"I wanted to talk to you about that," your mom says, gaze curious. "Why are you doing the PhD thing?"
You sit across from her, brows raised. "You know why, Mom."
"It’s just you never wanted one before your father passed," she says lightly. "You said your Masters was enough."
You don't know why but you feel defensive. 
"Well when he died I wanted to do something to honor him I guess. What better way to do that than by helping with the research?"
"Your father was a smart man, he was amazing at his job and so proud of you, you know that," your mother tells you before placing a dry hand over yours. "But his biggest joy in life was being a father."
"What are you getting at?"
"I'm saying I don't want you to dedicate your life to something because you feel like you should. This is your life, my love. You only get one."
"I know."
"There are plenty of ways to give back, to honor your father and still be around to watch your son grow up."
Your hackles immediately rise and she can tell the second they do. 
"I'm sorry," she says quickly when she sees the expression on your face. "Never mind. Let's talk about something else."
The rest of the visit flows smoothly, but you can’t ignore the way your mother looks at you whenever you mention Dieter.
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"Taco Bell."
Dieter is woken out of a deep sleep by your lips at his ear. You're curled up together in his bed, your belly prodding his lower back. 
"A Burrito supreme and a large Baja blast… And Cinnamon Twists…And four fire sauce packets."
You're warm against his spine, voice a soft whisper huffed along his earlobe. He’s dazed, his eyes blurry as he attempts to understand what’s happening.
"Huh?"
"I need Taco Bell," you urge. "Please?"
A quick glance at his phone tells him that it's nearing 2:00 a.m.
"S'too late for the delivery apps, baby," he murmurs, patting your thigh companionably as if the conversation is now over. 
For the most part, Dieter can anticipate and appease your cravings. Usually through Petra or food delivery apps. But at almost two in the morning he has access to neither. 
You don't care. 
You've been tossing and turning for hours because all you can think about is the beans and tomato and beef... You're practically drooling already. You pat his bottom politely, trying to signal he needs to get out of bed.  
"The drive thru is open."
"It's late."
"But I need it," you whine. 
You have no interest in attempting to drive one of Dieter's fancy foreign cars he keeps in the large garage. And it's too late to call a town car so you're stuck. 
"No one ever needs Taco Bell. Bringing that shit in here is offensive," he mutters into his pillow. "S'full of filler and chemicals."
You give a soft exhale through your nose, about to flop onto your back in defeat when something occurs to you. Something else that you're craving as well.  
Dieter is drifting back to sleep when he feels the light graze of your hand sliding over his hip. He thinks he's imagining it, but as the sensation continues his cock begins to stir. He goes rigid as your hand slides under his boxers, fingertips teasing his warm length as he groans. 
"You do this for me and I'll do something for you when you get back," you purr, tongue coming to trace his lobe. "Daddy." 
Dieter jumps out of the bed and nearly trips in his pursuit to grab his car keys as he simultaneously tugs on his sweatpants. 
"You want cheesy potatoes too?"
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When you wake up at seven months pregnant and see your reflection one morning you almost burst into tears.
You’re standing in front of the dresser mirror in your bikini, the only one left that fits. Your tits are practically bursting out of the cups, the bottoms tie at your hips dig into your flesh. You feel huge, you feel ugly and you feel not yourself.
There’s a knock at the bedroom door. Dieter peeks around, already dressed for the pool, a pink towel slung over his freckled shoulder.
“Swim time?”
Usually you swim by yourself, but Dieter has a rare free morning this week and he wants to take advantage. It had seemed like such a nice suggestion at breakfast, but now you balk, wishing you had anything else to wear but your fucking bikini.
Before it hadn’t mattered, but today you feel gross. You want to cover up as much as possible and you reach for your towel. But Dieter’s eyes are already drifting over your body, his cock stirring.
Dieter takes in the way your stomach protrudes out in the bikini, a beacon of fertility; his son nestled there safe within your body. He moves into the room, the towel dropping without thought onto the floor behind him.
"You're exquisite," Dieter breathes, his hand coming to rest on your belly. You feel his thumb gently rub, his eyes sparkling as he continues to stare at you.
"I look disgusting," you say cringing away from him. Dieter won't let go of your wrist as you try to flee. 
"Are you fucking insane?" 
“Dieter stop,” you say, wincing away from him and trying to pull your wrist out of his warm grip.
"You don't believe me," Dieter states flatly. 
"No I don't," you reply sharply. "It's what everyone tells pregnant women so they don't feel shitty about looking like a house."
Dieter blinks at you as if he can’t believe what he’s hearing before he’s shaking his head. His hands slide to your plush hips, turning you back to face the dresser. His eyes have blown pitch black, and his hands can’t stop from running along your body. 
"Look at her," Dieter groans into your ear. "Look at that sexy thing in the mirror."
"Dieter-"
"Keep looking," he urges you, hand gently forcing your face in the direction of the mirror before his hands slide up your bikini top over your breasts, pebbling the nipples. You swallow at the sensation, not even protesting when he unties it at the back, letting the colorful fabric drop to the ground.
You stand there in nothing but your bikini bottoms, cheeks flushed as Dieter groans deliciously behind you.  His hands come to cup your tits, thumbs grazing the protruding nipples.
“See her gorgeous fucking tits?”
You cringe away from the mirror, hating how you look. But if Dieter is lying about how turned on he is, he’s a better actor than you ever gave him credit for because his cock is swelling against your lower back, stiff and pulsing.
You let him untie your bikini bottoms, finding yourself already slick between your legs when they drop to the ground along with everything else. You watch in the mirror as Dieter sheds his swim shorts before gently urging you to place your forearms on the dresser.
You can only watch his face as he notches his cock at the entrance to your pussy, rubbing the head there and gathering the copious amounts of slick. His eyes flick from your face to your cunt as if he can’t decide which he needs to see more.
“Keep watching yourself, beautiful,” He rasps as he sinks into you, cock thick and full as you gasp. You’ll never tire of that sensation, the first thrust of his cock inside you. Your head falls forward but Dieter’s hand is there, gently making a fist in your hair and urging your face to the mirror.
"See how beautiful she looks when she's taking my cock?"
You can't see shit. Your belly is ballooned so far out you can barely handle it. But you look at your face and you see the heavy eyes and parted lips. You see the way you arch into Dieter’s body and how he towers over you and yeah... It's hot. 
"Cock drunk," Dieter tells you with a swell of pride. "All sexy and sleepy looking." 
His hands come to brace yours on the dresser, his dark eyes fixed on yours in the mirror.
"You see her?" Dieter pants, teeth gritting. "You see her tits bouncing? Feel her sweet pussy taking my cock? She's fucking magnificent. How can you say she’s not the sexiest thing alive?"
The way he talks about your reflection makes you almost jealous until you remember that it's you he's talking about. 
"You're so fucking gorgeous," Dieter babbles as he nears his orgasm. “Never been more turned on in my fucking life.”
And he means it. He means every fucking word. He can’t stop touching you, kissing your shoulder, your cheek, your mouth when you tilt back to face him. You whimper his name when he starts to fuck into you harder and harder.
“Come deep, Dieter,” you grunt. “Fuck me full.”
He does with one final thrust, painting your insides as he cries out your name.  
Despite this interlude you still suffer with crisis of confidence at times in the coming weeks. Your back is in constant pain. You waddle when you walk. You've never felt less attractive. 
Dieter is obsessed. He can't stop finding reasons to touch you, brushing your lower back when he passes you in the hall.
All pretenses of employer and employee are gone. You’re basically in his bed every night, fucking him whenever you get the chance. Neither of you observe it outright, but it’s there lingering under the surface every time he asks if you’re ready to go to bed. It’s there when you shower together, washing each other’s hair. It’s there when you both murmur good morning and let him kiss you languidly over coffee.
When he catches you napping in the sunshine on his couch he's so taken with you that you wake up to find his curly head between your legs and his mouth bringing you to a gentle orgasm. You keen against his lips, hands going to card through his hair as you come. 
You know why he's like this. It's because things are coming rapidly to an end. Once the baby is here this all ends. This ready access to sex, you lounging around his house. He'll have a newborn and you'll have a new life. You won't see him. You'll have your money, you'll be going back to school, and your mom's mortgage is paid off. 
Dieter knows how you feel about snuggling and he goes to pull away. 
"Don't," you say, arms outstretched, mouth twisted into a pout. Dieter stares at you in surprise, big puppy dog eyes wide. It makes you melt. He wraps himself around you, face nuzzling into your neck. The two of you snuggle there as you flick on the television to a Christmas special.
Just when you think Dieter is becoming a mature and sensible adult you feel him sigh heavily behind you.
“I'm not watching that depressing Christmas movie!" Dieter insists when It’s a Wonderful Life starts up. "I wanna watch the Muppet Christmas Carol!"
He can’t understand why you can’t stop laughing.
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One quiet morning with Dieter filming audio reshoots for the Rogue Duchess you sit at the kitchen table, pensive. You stare at the pro and con list you've made sitting in front of you. 
Ever since the conversation with your mother you've been second guessing your next steps post birth. Are you just doing it because you think you should be? Are you doing it because that's what you were doing when your dad died? Are you doing it because of misplaced guilt?
Your dad had been so proud of you, telling everyone about your Masters problem and how you were well on your way to a PhD like him.  
He talked fondly about having two doctors and a nurse in the house, joking that your home would become like Grey's Anatomy. 
Even then you'd felt a bit of the pressure to perform. To pursue a PhD to make him proud. In all your focus and pursuit you'd never really stopped to ask yourself... Is this what you want? 
Pros - honor dad - get to be called doctor at the end Cons  - no social life - have to move to Sacramento for several years - not guaranteed a job I like when I graduate - away from mom  - STRESS - possible burnout - job market is competitive - won't necessarily make me happy
You need to add something else. Something that's been in the back of your head screaming for your attention. You raise your pen to the paper, adding your final item to the con list. 
- Too far away from Dieter and Bubble. 
And then a sentence you write and then immediately erase before crumpling the entire paper up in a ball.
- I'm in love with Dieter. 
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[8:43am] D: It hasn't even started and I'm bored out of my fucking mind
[8:44am]: Dieter it'll be fun.
[8:44am] D: no it won't. I HATE these fucking marathon interview days 
Hours and hours of sitting with Mia and the rest of the crew talking about the upcoming film being released in a few months. He's covered in concealer and powder, his stylist has him in some absurdly patterned shirt that itches and he desperately needs a cigarette. 
[8:45am] D: I wanna be at home with you---
He hesitates before deleting that last message. He can't send you messages like that. You're not dating, no matter how much it feels like you are. He feels twitchy now, all out of sorts as he thinks about you home and waiting for him.
He sneaks off to the corner of the hotel, hoping he can get off a few puffs before Diane wrangles him back inside. 
He lights his cigarette, puffing away. He scans the space to make sure it's just hotel employees before he brings out his phone, going through his photos. He lands on the one from the other night, you mid laugh as the Jenga tower falls. You look so happy, so at ease. 
He’s so ridiculously in love with you.
How can he let you go? How can he go from seeing you every day to you becoming a stranger? You've got one foot out the door at all times and he doesn’t want to hold you back from your dreams. 
It was so easy to play house these past few months. To pretend like you were his. He was such a fool.
"Spare one?"
Dieter fumbles the phone, shoving it a hastily back into his jacket pocket. Its Mia dressed in a sleek black number, her makeup and hair perfect. She motions to the cigarette between his long fingers. 
"My last one," he says ruefully. 
Mia holds out her manicured fingers in his direction. "A quick puff then."
Dieter relents, handing it off to her. She takes a long drag, enjoying the curl of the smoke as the two of them stand shoulder to shoulder in silence. It feels awkward being together alone, the two of them haven't spoken since Prague. Dieter feels the need to fill the silence. 
"How's Sam?"
"He's good," Mia nods. "He's not secretly in love with his assistant so it's already much better than my last relationship."
Dieter can't help but let out a small chuckle at that.  Mia has been seen all over the tabloids in recent weeks with her hunky new Scottish co-star. Mia looks at Dieter with a small tilt of her head, squinting up at him.
"You tell her yet?"
"Tell who what?"
Mia takes another drag off the cigarette, giving him a leveling look.  "You know who and you know what."
Dieter says nothing, watching as Mia holds the cigarette aloft. She gives a dramatic sign when she sees. He's going to make her have to say it.
"Have you told your PA that you're fucking crazy about her," Mia says flatly. "That you want to marry her and have tons of little Bravo's running around."
"I do not."
"Maybe just the one little Bravo then," Mia smiles, handing him his cigarette. He feels her heavy gaze on him and he knows that she deserves answers. He put her through a lot and she has been gracious as hell about it.
He sighs heavily before twisting to face her head-on. "No, I haven't."
"Why not?"
"It’s…complicated." 
"What's complicated about love?"
"She told me she doesn't want to be a part of the baby's life."
"Back when she thought you only wanted to be together because you got her pregnant."
"She doesn't want me."
"Dieter I see how she looks at you. The girl is utterly besotted." 
"Might want to tell her that," Dieter huffs in forced amusement. 
Despite all the time you’ve spent together, you’ve really never made it clear how you feel about Dieter. Yes, you like the sex and you laugh with him. But you’ve never actually made overtures, talked about the future. You think of a future that doesn’t include him or your son.
Mia pauses for a moment, thinking about something. Her eyes scan the vicinity and before Dieter can do anything Mia grips him by the collar and plants a chaste kiss to his lips. Dieter pulls back immediately, his face cloudy.
"What the fuck-"
"You'll thank me," Mia promises.
He goes to say something to her about how uncool that was but a text from you sails in, almost as if fate is giving him the prompt he needs.
[8:58am]: If I wanted to postpone school for a little bit, do you think I could still stay with you? I could pay rent and everything. I think I just want to reconsider some things. Dunno if school is where I want to be right now.
“Fuck yes,” Dieter breathes, re-reading the message several times to make sure he’s not reading it wrong. You want to stay. You want to stay longer with him. He's still staring at your text with a goofy smile on his face when Mia’s voice sounds out beside him. 
“Dieter, c'mon! Interviews are starting.”
He shoves his phone into his pocket, his grin bright as he follows Mia back inside the hotel for the marathon of interviews.
You want to stay.
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The alert comes through on your phone, the setting still stuck on sending you Dieter Bravo related news items. 
You're relaxing on one of the chairs in the backyard, one hand gently rubbing your belly, the other holding your latest crime thriller novel. 
When the alert goes off its instinct to shut the book and retrieve the phone from the table beside you. Normal to scan the links that show up. 
BRAV-ROWE ROMANCE BACK ON? 
You sit up slowly, holding your expansive belly and grunting angrily. You continue reading as you walk inside, pacing around the kitchen. 
Bravo, 40, and Rowe, 25, were spotted earlier today stealing kisses between interviews for their upcoming release The Rogue Heiress. What’s setting tongues wagging is that Rowe has also been recently seen getting cozy with Sam Heughen, 43, back in her native England only last week. Was Sam just a distraction from her real feelings for Bravo? Or is this just a cleverly executed publicity stunt for their upcoming film? 
You slam your phone down onto the counter, irritation flooding you all over. 
What the fuck?
Here you are pining over this guy and he's off kissing his ex? 
Even their couple name is adorable. It fits. Your cheeks are flaming red at the realization that you fell for it. You fell for his lines, for his sweet eyes and sweeter mouth. You let yourself get swept up in a romance that isn't even real.
Dieter is an actor. He knows how to fake anything.
"I'm so fucking stupid," you say shaking your head. Bubble gives a gentle kick, drawing your attention back to the present.
 “Sorry honey. Mom’s not stupid. Just fucking naive.”
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It's dark when Dieter finally makes it home, shrugging of his jacket and toeing off his shoes. He wants to go to bed, to hold you after this long and boring day. 
But you're not in bed. You're seated on the couch with the TV off. Your crossword book is beside you but you don't look like you've been working on it. Dieter feels a smile break out over his features at the sight of you in his home. 
"Hi baby," he murmurs as he approaches, confused when you slowly turn to face him with a furious look on your face. "What’s wrong?"
“Have anything to tell me?”
“Uh…no?”
He watches you throw your head back and give an obviously false laugh. “No?”
“No.”
“Kiss any old girlfriends lately, Dieter?”
Dieter is stunned. How the hell did you find out about that? "How-"
"It's all over TMZ and now all the other news outlets," you say, teeth clenching. Dieter thinks about the way Mia checked around them before kissing him. You take a seat on the couch, arms crossed over your chest.
"I didn't just go kiss her," Dieter defends, coming to sit next to you. "She kissed me."
"Didn't really seem like you were fighting her on it."
You hold up your phone where the picture of Mia kissing Dieter is blown up. It's clear you've been studying the picture. Mia’s hand is on his collar, Dieter’s hand is on hers, but only so that he could pull it off. But to the outside viewer this looks very intimate.
“It’s not what it looks like.”
“No? Because what it looks like is you kissing your ex girlfriend.”
Dieter takes in the red of your cheeks and the way you’re clenching your jaw and despite everything a little thrill goes through him. 
"Why are you so upset?" Dieter purrs.
"I'm not," you insist.
You feel furious and out of sorts and you can't tell him why because you'll sound like a jealous girlfriend which you absolutely aren't. 
"You sound upset."
"Well I'm not." You chew at your bottom lip angrily. "It's just rude you know? Sleeping with me and seeing Mia. Does she-"
"I'm not seeing Mia," Dieter interjects. 
"I have eyes Dieter," you scoff. 
"She gave me a quick peck after we talked about Sam Heughan, her boyfriend, who she is in a committed relationship with."
"Yeah right."
Dieter stops a moment to take in your flushed cheeks, bright eyes and the arms that cross in front of you. You don’t want him to be seeing Mia and that can only mean one thing and that makes Dieter feel warm all over. His arm is on the back of the couch, almost behind your shoulders.
"You're jealous."
"I'm not," you insist, face heating. 
"Then why are you acting like this?" He probes, shifting closer to you on the couch. "Tell me the truth."
He’s so close and he smells so good and you just fucking… you just…
"Because you're mine."
It comes spilling out of you like a dam, a rush, a torrent of words that once said cannot be taken back. But for once you don’t want them taken back. You want him to know exactly what you mean, especially as you launch yourself towards him, your arms going around his neck, your stomach plump between the two of you. Dieter is grinning so widely his face might crack as he gazes at you on his lap. 
"I'm yours?"
"Yes," you all but growl, pushing him backwards until his broad shoulders hit the seat cushions of the couch and you begin straddling his prone body. His cock is rock hard through his pants, pressing into your core through your panties. 
You tug them to the side, not even bothering to take them off. Dieter is already sliding off his pants and boxers, smiling up at you eagerly. He's pulsing between your thighs, hissing with pleasure as you notch him at your soaked entrance. 
"Not hers," you grunt, sliding down his length with an aching groan escaping both of you. "No one else's. Just mine. You understand me, Bravo?"
You're staking your claim and Dieter is turned on out of his mind. You've never been possessive over him before, never been so commanding. Never been so clear in your desire for him. 
"Yes!"
He wishes he could hold you in his arms, but being laid out flat on his couch while you ride him isn't exactly torture. Your pussy milks his cock, a vice -like grip around his thick length. 
"I'm yours," Dieter repeats, thrusting up into your wet heat. "Just yours, baby."
"You only fuck me," you command, starting to bounce up and down in his lap the best you can with your swollen belly. His expression is pure delight, his wide palm on your hips. 
"Yes."
"Only I make you c-come," you try to sound authoritative but your hips are rolling over his and he feels so good. You're barrelling towards an orgasm with every husky assurance from him. 
"Only you," Dieter assures you, hands tightening around your gyrating hips. "And I only wanna make you come, baby. Only want you in my bed. Only you."
He's rambling and your eyes are cheating to the back of your head. You crest so fast, hands flying to the back of the couch so you can steady yourself. His hands slide up under your shirt and go to your breasts, pinching your pebbled nipples as you keen. 
"C'mon baby," Dieter encourages as he watches your head tilt back. "Take what's yours."
"Mine," you pant as you start to come, head lolling forward. Your body starts to give small little twitches as you groan. "Mine, mine, mine."
"Yours," Dieter breathes, gazing up at you. "Only yours."
He feels you come, soaking his cock with your release. He groans at the sight of your fucked out expression, your hips still undulating. 
"Now you," you command in a soft mewl. "Come for me, Dieter. Give my what's mine."
Your hands go to brace yourself on his chest, your hips lifting only to slide harshly back down, taking him as deep as possible. He feels a pleasurable stripe go up his spine.  
"It's all yours," he offers before his own pleasure overtakes him at the sight of your heavy-lidded expression. He comes deep, deeper than he ever has and he does so whimpering your name. 
You're both panting and you groan slightly as you pull yourself off of him, sitting back against the couch. Dieter rests there a few moments, his softened cock resting against his belly. He's smiling up at the ceiling like a madman. 
Then he's stripping off all his clothes and standing before urging you to do the same. 
"I'm fucking you in the shower," Dieter tells you as he pulls your t-shirt up over your head. "I want you to give me another one."
But you don't just give just him another one because it doesn't end in the shower. Or on the kitchen counter after a midnight snack. But in his bed where he urges you to the end of the bed and fucks you slowly standing next to the mattress, your thighs spread beautifully for him as his cock lazily saws in and out of you.
His hands grip your thighs tightly, urging you to bounce against his hips. Your bodies move together, the pleasure increasing.
“So good,” you croon, your forehead dotted with sweat. “You feel so perfect, Dieter.”
You’re babbling, high on the pleasure of his cock and his nearness. Dieter revels in it, the way you’re unabashedly giving him praise, the way you don’t stop him or shy away from him whispering sweet nothings into your neck.
“And I’m all yours,” he promises. You almost think you can read love in his eyes as they gaze down at you.
 “I’m all yours,” you tell him back without thought.
His thrusts increase, his hands holding you tightly, fingers splayed over your clit. He teases and rubs until you’re on the brink of another orgasm and you finally come in tandem, both of you trembling.
“That’s my girl,” he groans, kissing behind your ear as you shiver.
You don’t tell him you’re not his girl because right now you feel like you could be.
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You wake up the next morning in Dieter’s bed with one of his legs wedged in between yours, his arm draped over your middle and his forehead against your neck. It feels right and it feels perfect and as your sleep clears…A mixture of shame and disbelief overtakes your body.
What the fuck was that last night? 
You'd been almost mad with rage at the sight of that TMZ pic. And when he'd come onto the couch you'd just felt this strange possessiveness overtake you. 
Just want you in my bed. Only you. 
Those words were so nice to hear. So gratifying. And you believed him about Mia and the photo. It had been all too easy to move past it, to allow him to lick into your mouth as he fucked you. You glance over your shoulder to see him sleeping, his hair falling into his closed eyes. 
Mine. 
No. Not mine. 
He's not yours. He can't be.
He's Dieter Bravo and you're you. Thinking that somehow you could be together is a delusion.  Dieter just hates being alone. And he knows that being a father is a huge deal. He knows that it's all going to rest on his shoulders and he's looking for a lifeline as your due date grows rapidly closer.  
He doesn't actually have feelings for you.
It's just that Mia might be out of the picture and he's clinging to whatever is in the vicinity - today it happens to be you. Tomorrow it'll be whatever model he's paired with at the next photo shoot. 
You've known him long enough to know his moods and his ever changing interests. In a couple of months when the baby is here and you're in Sacramento he'll probably have forgotten your name. 
The thought hurts if you linger on it. He's just clinging to a lifeline and you can't be around when he does inevitably move onto the next woman because it'll break your heart. 
You need to get the apartment now. You need to find out where you're going to be staying next semester. You need to be planning your life post birth. 
He didn’t even write back to your text yesterday even though it said he’d read it. The one asking if you could stay longer, that you were considering postponing school. And you know why – because this wasn’t the plan. Because Dieter’s interest is waning and you know it.
You pull yourself from the bed, out of Dieter’s warm arms and you try your best not to look back at his still sleeping form as you tiptoe out of the room.  
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You return sometime in the afternoon to Dieter storming around the kitchen, looking frantic. He barrels towards you, tugging your hands that you quickly slide out of his grip.
“Why didn’t you answer your phone?"
“I had it on silent.”
"Where were you?"
"I was at the library," you say as if it were the most obvious answer. Dieter looks like he’s been fisting his hands through his hair all day.
"You're not supposed-"
"I know I’m not supposed to leave, but I wore sunglasses and no one recognized me." You put your purse down on the ground. "I just needed somewhere quiet to organize my thoughts. I needed to research apartments without distractions."
"Apartments," Dieter repeats slowly. 
"Yeah, for next semester," You say breezily as you push past him and make your way into the kitchen. He follows hot on your heels like a desperate puppy all big eyes and furrowed brows.
"Next semester? I thought you were thinking of postponing?"
He watches you glance around in the fridge before pulling out a bowl of blueberries that Petra has left for you. 
"No point," you say, popping one in your mouth. "I decided I need to get focused and start as soon as possible. That reminds me though; I don't think I can really stay long after the baby is born. I'll want to get to Sacramento as soon as possible."
Dieter looks as if you've punched him. He's gone pale, his large eyes luminous. He's sagging against the counter as if his own body can't support him anymore. 
"What? Why?"
"I told you, I need to focus," you tell him, popping the blueberries back into the fridge. "And I know that I don't get paid until the Bubble is born but I'm wondering if I can get half now? I need to put a down payment on an apartment out there."
"You're buying an apartment in Sacramento?"
"Of course," you say, taking a deep breath. "I'll be in school for a few years; the rest of my Masters then the PhD, then my residency out there. Makes sense." 
"But ... You weren’t even sure about it," Dieter says weakly. 
"That was before I really thought about it," You say, shrugging. "I can't sit around my boss's house all day organizing his next manicure and making sure his latest fuck buddies sign NDA's."
Dieter straightens immediately, his jaw clenching.
Too far.
As soon as you say it you wish you could take it back. It's an ugly, unfair thing to say and you both know it.  But you feel exposed, like a raw nerve.
Dieter feels everything inside him twisting hideously. He was so fucking deluded to think you'd stay, to think you'd fallen for him the same way he has for you. He wants to scream at his idiocy. 
How are you just so okay with this? How can you walk away like the last several months have meant nothing?
Dieter can only stare at you, his eyes going from wide to narrowed. His hand curls into a loose fist at his side, the other still braced on the counter. 
“There's a contract," Dieter all but growls. "You get your money once the baby is born."
"I know,” you say quickly. “It's just that the tuition is due this month to hold my spot for next semester."
"That's not my problem."
You take a step back, brows knitted. You weren’t expecting that. 
“But-“
"You signed a contract stipulating that you wouldn't get the money until the baby is born," Dieter croaks. "So there's your answer."
He turns from you, heading down the hallway to his art studio. You follow close behind, waddling quickly to keep up. 
"Dieter I can't afford the place without that money."
"Read the contract," he snaps. "You signed it."
He quickly moves into the studio, slamming the door behind him.
He hears you on the other side of the door, breathing heavily. He’s worried you’re crying.
Finally he hears you shuffle away and he moves to the window, sitting in the chair he reserved for you when you return home with your son. He imagined painting both of you, the light bathing you both in a dreamy glow.
Dieter is devastated, his head resting heavily in his hands as he fights back the urge to sob.  
What the fuck happened? One minute you were insisting he was yours, your bodies working together beautifully. The next second you're telling him you're halfway out the door. 
You don’t want to be a mother. You never did. You always made that perfectly clear. He was just too besotted to understand.  He looks around his art room, feeling a fury building within him. What the fuck has this all been for? Why the fuck is he so fucking stupid? Why did he have to go and fall in love with you? 
He needs drugs. He needs alcohol. He needs something to take this stabbing pain away. And just as his trembling hand goes to his phone to call up Corey Brigham he glances up at the painting he's been currently working on. 
It's an oil painting image from a dream he had recently. One where he stands in the ocean up to his knees, the wind gentle and the day mild. Dieter is holding you back against him, his head over your shoulder, both of you gazing down at the tiny infant in your arms. 
And there's his son, eyes closed, a soft smile on his face. The image of what Dieter things he’ll look like.
My son. 
The cell phone is pushed back into his pocket. He's not living just for himself anymore. He's got a son he will put before himself in all ways. His son will not grow up with an absent father like Dieter did. 
All of a sudden his studio door bursts open. You look harried as you stride in, fixing him with a glare. He knows you want to tell him off and he wishes you didn't look so beautiful when you’re angry. 
"You're not supposed to be in here," Dieter insists, feeling a stab of anxiety go through him as you walk towards him. He leaps up from the chair, almost tripping over himself in his desire to usher you out of the room.
“We were in the middle of a conversation,” you snap. “You can’t just-“
Your cutting remarks die before they can be completely formed because as you glance around the room your eyes widen in shock. 
Dieter’s art room has always been a mix of canvas, paint spills, old coffee cups and grotesque sculptures. But right now all of the painted canvases are positioned around the room, sketches lining the drafting table under the window.
And they are all of you.
Ones of you with your belly swollen, sleeping on the couch. Others of you cross legged at the table hunched over your laptop. There's one of you with your face serene as you lay the bathtub, that night Dieter and you talked for hours. Snapshots of time, your belly at different stages. 
"Are these..." You go over to a stack of sketches. “Are these all me?”
Dieter is silent, his eyes drifting to your face when you take in the portrait he did of the three of you. Your hand goes to your belly instinctively as you take in the image.
“I always imagined he’d look like that,” you say with a soft little huff.
Your eyes go to the drafting table, sketches in charcoal sticking out to you. Some are dated as far back as Ireland, some even before that. Your fingers linger on one in particular of you chewing your bottom lip in thought, a pencil raised between your fingers. You glance at the date. 
“This was before I was pregnant.” You trail off, gaze moving back to his face. "How long have you been sketching me?"
Dieter shrugs and for the first time since you've known him he looks truly embarrassed. 
"A while." 
You move slowly towards him. "Why?"
He sighs, only steps away from you now.
"Isn't it obvious?" 
You swallow, feeling your heart pound a devastating rhythm. No, this can’t be real. He can’t be suggesting what you think he is.  And yet as he stands there, dark eyes wet you can’t help but wish for it to be real.
“I'm crazy about you,” Dieter confesses.
No, not confesses. That would suggest he wanted to keep it hidden, when it’s anything but.
“I just want to be with you all the time. I want to share everything with you. My life, my home, my everything. I want you here in this house with our son. I want to support you going back to school. I want to make you happy in any way I can but I want you to do it as mine.”
You want to say something, to say anything to this grand romantic speech, but your throat has tightened and your mouth gone dry. All you can do is stand there, staring at him like a pregnant idiot.
“And I know that’s selfish to say and I know it’s useless because you don’t love me back but I-I just needed you to know before you left,” Dieter continues, tears wetting the side of his cheek.
“You don’t need to love me back. Our son is a piece of you and if that’s all I can have of your love, that’s enough for me. He’s more than enough. I just. . . I needed you to know the truth, all of it. I fell for you way before you got pregnant, but after this time together I just, I’m...I love you.”
And now his tears are brushed away by the back of his hand and he looks as if he’s going to turn away from you, overcome with everything that he’s just admitted.
You can barely see through the tears in your eyes. All the feelings that have been swirling within you compel you to pitch forward, your hands outstretched, his name on your lips.
You’re about to cross the room, desperate for his touch when a stab of pain goes through you sharply, causing you to almost come to your knees.  You begin doubling over with a cry as Dieter runs to close the distance between you, his hand immediately on your back.
“What is it, baby?”
Dieter is confused when he sees an overwhelming amount of clear liquid running down your legs. Your eyes are round, wide and terrified when you look up to him.
"Dieter, I think I'm going into labor." 
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respectthepetty · 1 day
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I recently entered asian qls, and I've been hearing a lot about gmmtv in thai bl. what's the deal with that? do they make good bls or something?
What's the deal with GMMTV?
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I (and a few other people) have given GMMTV the nickname of Disney BL because
It has the budget
It has stylish shows
Most are plot-by-numbers (meaning formula style plots that are predictable)
And it's all about branding
Good and bad are subjective, so does GMMTV make "good" BLs is not a question that can be answered, especially by me, but GMMTV does make BLs. A lot of BLs.
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In 2022 and 2023, half of its shows were BLs. And a few others were BL-lite (Midnight Museum and Home School, I'm looking at you). Out of the 16 shows announced in GMMTV 2024 Part 1 (Part 2 is coming tomorrow), 10 of those shows were BLs/GLs/QLs. Over half of their shows are focused on queer relationships. [Photos from Boys Love Hub]
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So regardless if I think they are good or not, the company is doing some heavy lifting in regards to queer representation since all of their shows have 1) a queer character, 2) a queer director, or 3) a queer producer.
As much shit as I want to give GMMTV, and DO, the company makes being queer palatable for mass distribution, and that's mainly because of its branding and reach since all shows, at one point, were free on YouTube for most countries.
Take right now for example, BrightWin fans are up in arms because Bright has a girlfriend. BrightWin haven't had a series since 2021's 2gether movie. THREE YEARS AND PEOPLE STILL SHIP 'EM! *eye roll* And that's because GMMTV doesn't just make BLs. It makes a brand of each and every one of its actors. If an actor is put into a pair, there will be a mascot, fanclubs, fan meets, tours, light sticks, y todo.
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Someone wrote a good post, which I cannot find now, about the idolifacation of GMMTV actors, and it's accurate. These aren't only actors. They must sing. They must dance. They must host Live House. They must participate in Safe House. They must have a vlog and do live streams every week. They must go on GMMTV's little outing events and have a spin-off show where they travel around with their paired partner and eat food or drink some cocktail or do something because Lord forbid these people do nothing.
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And this isn't just a GMMTV thing, but only GMMTV does it on this scale, so what's the deal with GMMTV is that it is a company doing company stuff.
I'm sure others can chime in and give more in-depth points, but I'm exhausted even thinking about it!
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shining-latios · 2 days
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hey all. I wanted to make a post real quick to say that, starting this week, basically everything is going to change for me in a major way. I'm finally leaving not just my home, not my city, but I'm leaving Ohio for good.
as of yesterday, I have left my job I've been at for the past almost 3 years, and while I'm tying up loose ends this week, preparing for my move, and getting all of my documentation, etc changed over for a new state this week, starting now I am UNEMPLOYED! but as you can imagine, this doesn't mean that my bills and especially my student loans are going to be put on hold to accommodate my move and all these big changes, which means that right now, more than ever, I need my gfm to get attention because my payments are almost $700 a month and I currently have no source of income
>> Link to my GFM <<
This gfm has been active for over 3 years and l've paid several times what it's made out of my own pocket by now, I know everybody is struggling and I really don't want to ask for too much. my bf is going to be helping me out but I really don't want to put the onus of assistance on them. if anybody at all could help give me a safety net while I take the time to look for a new job in the coming weeks/months I would unbelievably appreciate it ;-;
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dotthings · 3 days
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Oh, this moment on the Jensen and Rob panel at Jib14 made me so happy.
Jensen: If every time they hurt Dean, they hit his heart, they hit his chest?…Oh like a heart attack? Gosh I’ve never thought about that. That’s a really interesting like…pick up. Maybe. That’s a writer question, that’s a good question. That was never something that was conveyed to me, that was never something that was told to me, that we’re going to attack Dean’s heart the most and it’s because he’s got the biggest heart. But it’s a really good kind of perception or perspective on the story and I think it might have been one of those happy accidents that it happened that way, maybe subconsciously to the writers and probably subconsciously to me, if you want to get Dean, that’s where you get him. And it makes sense….thank you…now I’m going to think about that for the rest of the day! Thanks a lot! Rob: That was like poetry. Jensen: That was beautiful.
Although, I doubt it wasn't on purpose on the part of the writers--we've seen the symmetry on spn, we've seen how it rhymes. Although I'm sure there are a few things where they'd do it the first time, and then realize how that came across symbolically, and then keep leaning into it, because that's how creative process sometimes work. (Just saying, fandom leans way too hard into the assumption everything good on spn was accidental instead of understanding, no it wasn't, but accidents are part of the creative process, too). There's deliberate reasons Death went for Dean's heart in 15.18, for example.
Anyway I appreciate Jensen's comment here and the fan's analysis and Jensen's appreciation of their analysis and Jensen's idea that it was subconsciously in his own mind even if he didn't think about it that way himself before. Because Dean has a really big heart, and "if you want to get to Dean, that's where you get him." Bingo.
LOL poor Jensen caught Dean feelings. His faux grumpiness about it absolutely sent me. Yes, same Jensen. We do this to each other in fandom all the time. Now I've caught Dean feelings too, thanks a lot Jensen, now I'm going to think about this for the rest of the evening!!! And I'm going to spread the Dean feelings just by making this post!!! Jensen has to suffer Dean feelings, so do we!!!
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