#I've been craving hugs and physical affection a lot lately

[throwawayformydb]

Falling in love everyday

Note: this post was originally published on /r/DeadBedrooms

Today, I realized I'm falling in love a lot. It might be a waitress, a barista, or someone I see walking by. These women aren't necessarily provocatively dressed, they don't exude sexual energy or some other magical thing.

They just seem nice.

And as I sat here in a coffee shop trying not to follow the nice-seeming barista around the store with my eyes as she went about her duties, it occurred to me just how pathetic this is. I feel like that socially-awkward, hopeless guy that we all knew in high school—the one that you just knew would never get a date, because he'd never have the courage to ask for one.

Only for me it isn't a lack of courage. It's that I'm married to someone whom I love dearly, but from whom I no longer receive any affection.

She'd kill me if she saw me looking at other women. She'd be devastated if she knew how often I find my heart beating a little faster when someone who happens to be female shows me the least big of basic human kindness. A smile, a funny remark. A little cheerful banter.

Why does all of this affect me this way? Because I haven't felt it from or for my wife in... much longer than I care to admit.

Sure—we still exchange "I love yous" every day. I do everything I can to make her life easier. I help around the house. I offer to do school drop-offs and pick-ups. I help with homework. I also work endless hours in the business we've built together and carry far more of the weight than I should, or that's even close to sustainable. For her, we're better off financially than we've been in years. But I'm the one handling all the stress of the money and daily juggling all the pressures to make sure she doesn't have to handle the difficult stuff.

And we have sex once or twice a month. I almost never initiate anymore because it feels to her like I'm pressuring her. We've talked. We've had something similar to "the talk." She's going to work on it, she really is. But things have been hard. Transitions in parenting. Transitions in hormones. Being sick. Being busy. Extra stuff on the plate.

It all adds up. But what it adds up to is, "I don't matter." My feelings don't matter. The fact that I feel unloved doesn't matter. The fact that nothing I've done (including creating more financial stability) makes her want to be affectionate towards me—not to mention have sex with me—tells me that she really is the self-centered person I always told myself she wasn't. I made all the excuses for her. I've listened empathetically as she's told me tales of trauma as a young woman at the hands of guys who were abusive—verbally and emotionally, at least. I've tried to help nurture her and encourage her through body image issues (she's always been beautiful and desirable to me and she has heard this from me for 20 years now), eating disorders, depression, parenting difficulties... you name it.

I've tried desperately to not be selfish. Don't be "that guy." You know—the one that only cares about himself. The one that treats women like shit. The one that doesn't respect the effort and hardships that come with being a woman in today's society, being a Mom, being uniquely female. I respect all of that. I've always treated her right.

Until lately. Oh sure, I still treat her right. But inside I'm dying. I'm looking for love. I'm looking for affection, for attention. I crave basic human contact. Hugs (which I get from her, but not often), kisses, affection, making out. What would it be like to be kissed passionately?

And that's what I wonder when I meet a nice female. Do they know that inside I'm dying? That I want to be with them? Not to use them lustfully or just get off over their physical attributes. But to feel connected. To kiss. To love.

We've got a list of marriage counselors. With no insurance, some of these prices seem staggering. Is it worth it for me to go to sessions with a therapist and pay all the money when I feel like I've lost hope that any of this will ever change?

Should I just accept that we have a business relationship? A domestic arrangement? At least until we're empty nesters and I don't feel the need to keep a stable household like a good father? But by then will I have any desirability left at all for any woman I meet? Old and used up? My best years wasted on someone who just didn't have it in her—not maliciously, but just as a deficiency—to love me, desire me, make me feel loved?

Do the people sitting here in this coffee shop notice me discreetly wiping a tear from my eye? Do I look like I'm dying inside? I hope not. My facade is all I have left.

#deadbedroom #dead bedroom

[littlewhispersofsolitude]

Imagine Your OTP #357

Person A begging a busy person B for cuddles, and eventually A gives in and sits down with them for a little while, allowing them to curl up in their lap and fall asleep. As soon as they're out to it, they carry them to their bedroom and tuck them in tight with a small kiss to their forehead before going back to whatever they were originally doing.

#I've been craving hugs and physical affection a lot lately #I don't know why because I hate physical touch lol #person a #a #person b #b #imagine your otp #otp #otp prompts #writing #writing prompts #fanfic #fanfic prompts #fanfiction #fanfiction prompts #drabble #drabble prompts #one shot #one shot prompts

[evierena]

The Brothers eavesdropping to MC accidentally confessing their undying love for them. Part 2

INTRO

MC was having their monthly catch-up call with their best friend in the Human Realm. At first, their friend could not believe the situation MC was living, but after a few calls they had finally come to accept the whole "I was summoned to Hell, but it's called Devildom, and now I have to live with 7 hot demon brothers and they are actually kinda nice" situation (yeah, Levi would be proud of my naming skills). Anyhow, during this specific call MC was filling in their friend with the latest update on their newfound feelings for one of the brothers, not knowing that said brother was actually outside their room, eavesdropping! And then, their friend asks "What is it about him that you love so much?"

What did MC respond? How did that brother react and what did he do with that information? Well, let's see...

Asmodeus

- Impromptu spa night!

- That's what he was thinking when he headed to your room, wanting to test a few new products he just gotten his hands on.

- Of course, he had to stop for a second to fix his already perfect hair before going in your room, and that's how he got to listen to your friend through the phone asking:

- "Why do you love this Asmo guy so much?"

- Asmo's eyes went 👀 and he decided to stay a little longer just outside your door.

- "Well, that's easy. Because he's been so sweet and supportive of me, he always tries to bring a smile to my face, he also knows when to stop his innuendos and respect my physical boundaries. Everyone else just see the Avatar of Lust in him, sometimes I feel like even he just thinks of himself as just lust embodied, but I think he has a lot more to offer than just mind blowing sex. He's more fragile than he lets on, his sassy and mean façade are to cover up his insecurities and his vulnerability. He's the King of Self Care but that doesn't mean he loves himself as much as he proclaims, actually I think that the first is a way to make up for the lack of the latter. However, I see the way he craves non sexual affection, the sweet and soft sides of love that he's been denied for his sin. I see all of that and I think he's still the most beautiful being I've ever laid eyes upon, and I have already met another fallen angels, angels, demons and humans. Also, I've seen the way he can create something beautiful out of scraps, how he can redecorate and sew together clothes, accessories and a lot of other cute little trinkets, his creativity is really impressive and I'm so proud of him. I love Asmodeus like I've never loved anyone else in my life".

- Asmo let himself draw another breath in when he finished listening to your accidental confession.

- You loved him for himself. You saw beyond his mask, and still thought of him as the most beautiful being in your life.

- Asmodeus was crying, relieved and moved. He felt the familiar warm and fuzzy feeling he usually felt when he would catch you staring lovingly at him.

- The fifth born was no fool, he caught you multiple times sighing after him, but he was never sure what you meant. Were you desiring him just as much as he was for you? Was there something more? Would he be ready to accept it if it wasn't? Could he recover from being seen just as Lust by you of all people? He wasn't sure, which is why he hadn't acted on his feelings any more than the usual.

- But now, he had the words he longed to hear from you. He was trembling from happiness, he was ecstatic, he couldn't help himself from bursting into your room, catching you in your comfy pj's, hair pulled back and cellphone in front of your face while your best friend continued talking through the camera, but you were busy staring at the tearful pink haired demon.

- He knelt beside you in your bed, he hold your face toward him, skin products forgotten in the floor, and he started to pepper your face in kisses mumbling in between how much he loved you too, and how happy he was to have met you.

- In conclusion, hearing your thoughts about him eased his worries and encouraged him to finally claim the sweet love he's been craving from you.

Beelzebub

- Sweet hungry boy was in his way to the kitchen, and when he passed by your door, he started craving something other than food, something more like your company, so he decided to ask you if you wanted a late night snack with him.

- Of course, because this is how it works, just as he was going to knock on your door, he heard loud and clear.

- "So, you're saying you fell in love with Beelzebub"

- That wasn't your voice, actually, he remembered it from that time he was in your room watching a movie and you received a call from the human realm, it was your best friend from there, right? Then, what were they talking about?

- "Yes" you replied.

- "But why? Can you explain it to me?"

- Boi, did he forgot all about his cravings, all he wanted to hear was your response.

- "Beelzebub is the prime example of a gentle giant. He is so, so, so gentle with me, except for that one time, but still. I love how calm it is to be with him, how honest he is with his feelings for his brothers or in general, he isn't afraid to say he loves them, specially Belphie. I love how easily he welcomed me into his family, I love the way he earnestly tries to control his stomach, I'm saddened thinking that his sin consumes so much of him, but I'm amazed that even like that, he still has so many different thoughts and feelings aside from food and hunger. He is so soft and he works hard, he doesn't talk much but what he says, he means it completely, he protects me from everyone even himself. I'm completely smitten for him, honestly, if he asked me, I would let him eat me alive, but at the same time I know he would never hurt me. His presence has helped me go through so much. When I'm stressed he's always there to let me vent or to reassure me that I can keep going, to offer me his precious snacks when I'm tired, and his hugs when I'm feeling down. I... I love Beel."

- An unaware ear to ear smile was present in the orange haired demon, his heart and stomach agreeing that what he needed now was to hold your human form in his arms and treasure you for the rest of his immortal life.

- What was the best way to convey his feelings to you? He didn't want to upset you by admitting he had eavesdropped in your private conversation with your friend, but he wanted, craved and needed to express his own feelings.

- Of course, food and cuddles.

- So he continued to head toward the kitchen and he began to gather your favorite snacks, well, what he could gather given that the kitchen rather lacked all your human preferences but he managed somehow.

- And then, he went straight to your door, this time knocking before he heard anything else.

- When you opened and saw the huge and adorable demon, holding food and with an excitement you couldn't quite understand in his purpleish eyes, you let him right in.

- Your phone call was finished and so, Beel sat down in your bed and offer you the snacks.

- When you asked why he simply said "Because I love you"

- Damn this beautiful, smooth, adorable giant. Now you were blushing and your brain scrambled trying to find an answer for such a sudden confession.

- After that initial shock, you also responded to him with your own feelings, and he began to explain that both his heart and his hunger, although never truly satisfied, were now fuller thanks to you and your presence in his life. And that is as much of a romantic confession you'll get, because for him, that is honestly how he feels and he hopes you understand what he truly means.

- Of course you do, and you're about to cry because omg your crush just confessed to you.

- Then he gives you the snacks, and he said he was sorry for not being sorry for eavesdropping on you earlier.

- What can I say? You said you loved his honesty.

- In conclusion, Beel is more satisfied now that he listened to your confession, and is even more now that he also confessed. Now you both get to be full and satisfied with each other.

Belphegor

- In his defense, he technically wasn't eavesdropping, it was your fault for not realizing that he was also in the attic, under the covers in one recondite corner, half asleep.

- So, you were talking with your bestie, and your laughs and antics while updating them on your life, woke him up completely, but he was having fun listening to the way you retell your adventures with him and his brothers.

- And then, your friend asked: "Soo, MC, have you finally confessed to sleepy boi?"

- Well, well, what do we have here? Thought Belphie, even more invested in your conversation now that it had took a turn to his liking.

- "Of course not! These days I have been so conscious about him I can't look at him much less be alone with him to even think of confessing"

- Oh, so that's why it seemed like you were avoiding him.

- Honestly, Belphie thought you had finally come to your senses and realize you shouldn't involve yourself with him for your own good. He was hurt, it hurt him more than he was willing to admit, and he had isolated himself to also avoid you, so it wouldn't hurt as much. That was the reason he was in the attic that night.

- "Anyway, MC, just let me ask one more time, why is it that you love Belphegor so much?"

- He heard the hitch in your breath, he heard you inhale and exhale deeply, but he himself stopped breathing at all, an he stayed still trying to attract the least attention to himself in the corner. He felt a light blush paint his cheeks, sweat forming in his forehead.

- "Well, even though we started off badly, he has repent himself, he is still trying to earn my forgiveness, it doesn't matter how many times I tell him I already did. He understands me, he gives me a safe space to just sleep and let go of my stress, he listens when I want to vent, and I honestly find his humor hilarious and relatable. He is a bit bratty but I find it so cute. And he is hurting so deeply, he has been for so many years, so beyond our existence and just now he is starting to open up, to let go, and heal, it's just beautiful. Belphegor is so simply beautiful, his soft smile, his lazy eyes, his crazy bedhair, his low and raspy voice. I love everything about him, and I will give all that I own to know more, to see more, to be there when he realizes his own worth"

- The youngest brother was blushing, and his heart was beating fast and loud in his chest, he felt a warmth spread through his veins he had missed during the last days without you.

- Belphegor knew right there, he was done for, it wouldn't matter whatever happened, it wouldn't matter what anyone said, he was going to love you for all eternity, and he would spend every second he could with you, treassuring you and loving you.

- Starting now.

- Belphie got up from his spot in the corner, startling you, he gathered his blankets and pillows and brought them to you, ignoring the fact that you were a panicking, blushing, stuttering mess.

- "Belphie... I was... It's just... It isn't... I-I" he put a finger in your lips, effectively shutting you up, he took your phone, and pressed it against his ear.

- "It's bedtime, so excuse us" and hung up.

- His heterochromatic eyes never leaving your e/c ones, his finger still pressed against your mouth, pillows and blankets surrounding both of you, his scent flooding your senses.

- You saw a smile pulling his lips up, his eyes admiring you with such soft love. His hand moved to cup your face, and he brought you in for a small kiss.

- And then he fall in the sea of fluffly warm beneath him, dragging you along, and he made sure to find the most comfortable position for both, one that allowed him to hold you and the he whispered.

- "I love you too, dummy"

- In conclusion, when Belphegor accidentally finds out about your feelings for him; he basks in the most sweet and peaceful dream he's ever had, with you right in his arms.

I struggled for months to write Belphie's part, but I finally did it & I quite like it.

Again, if you find any mistake, please, kindly point it out for me, so I can get better.

Thank you for reading and have a great day/night!

Atte. Evie

Edit: Here’s Part 1

Tag list:

@katsukis-sad-angel

@anonymous-hq

@dawn-808

@monsoloooo

#obey me shall we date #obey me #obey me headcanons #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #asmodeus x mc #beelzebub x mc #belphegor x mc

[mrs-march-ahs]

Hello There! I've been binge-reading your imagines lately and love all of them! Could I please request a super duper fluffy James March imagine where it's the reader's birthday? It's my birthday today and I'm craving some soft James. Thanks so much!

James Celebrating The Reader’s Birthday

baby first of all happy birthday😭 I truly hope you’re still here, since this is from a little while back. I’m sorry it took me so long, but better late than never I hope! Sincerely enjoy:)

X- your age

----

James March was a master at giving presents, because not only was he always willing to buy you all the riches your heart desired, but because he also put a lot of love and thought into every item. Every detail was always perfect, and if every single petal on every single rose wasn’t ideal, he wouldn’t get it. It came to no surprise, that when you woke up this morning, exactly X years since you were born, James has everything prepared. He had planned all the gifts and all the activities months back, to make sure he did everything he could to make your day special. He needed to outdo himself every year, and with this year being your first birthday as his wife, he made sure it was extra special. The celebration began straight away, when you first awoke and went to the bathroom, and was greeted with a perfume sitting by the sink, with a big pink bow on top. You couldn’t help but smile and open it up right away, smelling it and exhaling in awe at the scent. When you lay back in bed, you look over at James’ empty side of the bed, and notice the teddy bear laying in his space. The cream-colored bear is wearing a tiny tuxedo, bringing another immediate smile to your face. When you pick it up and look at it closer, giggling at the resemblance to your husband, you pull it closer to chest and squeeze him. Even more than the soft feel, the smell catches your attention. You don’t even understand how it was possible, but it smelled exactly like James. Not like his strong cologne, or his body wash, but his natural scent. Although he laid in his spot for a few hours, it was impossible for him to catch it that quickly. The idea of your husband hugging the bear or holding it close for it to start smelling like him, makes you grin even wider. The preparation made the gesture even more special.

Your longing stare at the bear is interrupted by a knock at the door. When you allow the visitor to come in, you are greeted with Miss Evers who pushes in a cart with food on top, and a big bouquet of red roses which immediately catch your eye. She smiles at you and wishes you a special day, and shows you the black dry cleaning bad she has. She raises her eyebrows a few times laughing and hangs the outfit up, before giving you the tray with breakfast.

“Mr. March sends you breakfast, it’s crepes from a restaurant that apparently you’ve been to”, she says, picking up the silver dome and revealing the fancy breakfast. Your mouth opens in shock, recognizing the food from a restaurant you went to with James on Halloween one night. With Halloween being the one night a year in which James can leave the hotel, he makes the most of it and began last year with taking you out to breakfast, at a restaurant that is now closed. Miss Evers brings you your red roses, and laughs at your shock at the food.

“Don’t ask me how he got it- I know the restaurant is shut”, she laughs and shrugs, and tugs the cart out of the room, leaving you to eat in peace. After smelling and examining the roses, you turn to your breakfast, and pick up your fork, only to see a note on the tray. You pick it up and open it, seeing James’ calligraphy.

Happy birthday, my sweet angel. Though I will attempt to spoil you with as many gifts as I can bare, it is I who received the most incredible gift, the day you were born. James

Blood rushes to your cheeks and you turn as red as the flowers in front of you. As you happily eat your breakfast, you can’t stop thinking about how lucky you are to be with a man like James who goes out of his way to make you as happy as he physically can.

Just when you thought you couldn’t be happier with him, he proposed to you. He decorated the top of the hotel and you had dinner there together, under the stars. Just as the clock hit midnight and the day became the anniversary of your first date, he began telling you how much he loves you and cherishes you. Once he popped the question, tears filled your eyes and you jumped straight on him, with your arms around his neck and smothering him with kisses. He held you close and couldn’t stop smiling, before asking you for the answer. The second you said yes, and the beautiful engagement ring sparkled on your finger, James took the knife out of his cane and looked at you for permission. He said he couldn’t bare the idea of anything happening to you outside of the hotel and him losing you forever. Though the idea of death filled your heart with terror, the idea of an eternity spent without James scared you much more. Nostalgically thinking back to the day you died by the hands of your lover, you finish your breakfast and walk over to the desk and look at the black bag Miss Evers left there.

You slide your fingers down with the zipper and slowly pull the hanger out of the bag, the shimming silver dress blinding you. The note on the hanger simply writes, 6pm- Room 66. But you can’t possibly wait until dinner to tell your husband how grateful you are for all these gifts, so you rush down to his office.

You knock a few times before entering, and look over at James surrounded by paperwork, rubbing his forehead in focus. Instead of making your presence known, you sneak up on him and jump, wrapping your arms around his neck. Your affection catches him off guard and he pulls you on top of his lap.

“You know it’s my birthday-”

“Really? I had no idea, angel”

You laugh and shake your head before continuing. “Since it’s my birthday, could I ask for something particularly special?”. You look at James and slide your hand on his shoulder, and when he nods once, you inhale before asking for what you truly wanted.

“Could we go upstairs? And cuddle, just for 10 minutes!”

James looks at the piles of paperwork in front of him and then glances at the clock on the wall. You prepare yourself for James to chose work over you, but much to your surprise, when he looks at you, he smiles.

“Since you are the birthday girl, I believe it would be inappropriate- forbidden, almost, to say no”

#american horror story #ahs #american horror story hotel #ahs hotel #james march #james patrick march #mr march #james march x #james march x reader #evan peters character #james march imagine

[that-little-zebunny]

Skin to Skin (First Sleep over)

Pairing: Loki x Avenger!Reader

Warning: fluff with a pinch of smut. Implied smut.

WC: 1.358

Summary: You're new to the team and end up messing it up with the God of mischief on your first day in. Knowing his reputation you're up for a fun time in the compound.

Note: sorry this is late. Had some bad brain day and I wasn't able to do anything. 🥺 i hope you all dont mind and hope you'll enjoy this.

Also dont forget to check out the HBC's Week of Love and @the-th-horniest-book-club .

Series Masterlist

"Hey, glad you're back and… is safe." You greeted Loki as you walked next to him. Eying him up and down to see if he's hurt but all you saw is his gorgeousness in all its glory. Nodding your head in approval and seeing he's very much fine you held his hand firmly to make him stop walking you tiptoed to kiss his cheeks.

"I am glad I am back too, my sweet cookies. I have missed you." He smiled caressing your cheeks as you stared up at him. You can feel the calm contentment from him and that made you relax completely.

"I hope next time they'll put us on the same mission." You pout as you both start walking again.

"Oh you know why they are not doing that." He laughed.

"Well it was just one time!" You said hands folding on your chest as the memory of your last mission together came to your mind.

It was one big fight with some underground army. It's one bloody day as they tried to fight you off when you came to take their base down and some very high tech and alien weapons were involved and one of those was able to shot Loki from behind causing you to lose focus as you saw everything. He was thrown and was on the ground unmoving and something inside you snapped.

You cried out running towards him. You felt like your brain was about to explode from fear when he didn't respond to your call. You can hear your team's voices over your comms but it was like they're underwater. You couldn't understand what they're saying. All you can think of was Loki is gone and something happened that you didn't know is possible. Everyone within two meter radius from you all fell down clutching their head, crying out, screaming painfully and some had blood on their eyes and nose. You got to Loki holding him in your arms. He's eyes were closed but you felt his consciousness trying to slowly wake up. Caressing his cheeks you kept on muttering please wake up in your head again and again. It was like you're trapped in a bubble and all you can see is him. You only snapped out of it when Nat touched your arm making her calmness rubbed to you. You looked up at her and saw that she's holding the side of her brain too.

You looked around surprised seeing half of the soldiers fighting you were down.

"I-I did that?" You asked, surprised. You've never been able to do that. Influence anyone without physical contact.

"We think so." Nat said, finally relaxing as the pain in her brain slowly fades.

"I-I...oh god, I'm so sorry!" You gasp. You got scared again with the new knowledge but was able to calm down when you felt Loki's consciousness in your. Second later his arms came up to your cheek.

"Everything will be alright, sweet cookies. We will figure this out." He grunted and he pushed himself up sitting down to touch his side. Green mist came out of his hands towards the injury and it disappeared. "I'm sorry that I scared you." He said kissing your cheeks and that's how it started. The team tried to keep you away from Loki if the mission is dangerous or when you're not on a mission you're in Bruce's lab trying to figure out how it happend.

"I shall meet you later alright?" You blinked at Loki when he spoke. You're now in front of the conference room. You nodded.

"Don't forget we have movie night alright?" You reminded him and walked towards Bruce's lab.

It was getting dark and you're in your room waiting for Loki. You've brought in snacks and some drinks. Mostly for you because earth's alcohol doesn't affect Loki. You also have stocks of movies to choose from. You nervously waited. This will be the first time you'll have him alone in your room and just the thought had your face heating up.

"It's alright, it's just movie night." Breathing in and out to calm yourself you checked everything again. It's just you doing your usual hobby with a plus one now. You're fluffing the pillow for the third time when it came, three soft knocks on your door. Sneaking a nervous peak on your setup you walked to let Loki in.

"Hello gorgeous." He greeted you kissing your cheek. You've been touching Loki a lot now that you've become comfortable with his emotions.

"Gorgeous your face." Laughing you moved to the side to let him enter. "I'm wearing pajamas and have bad hair."

"You can be in the ugliest clothing midgard can have and still be gorgeous." He said, pulling you close to steal a kiss and let you go as quickly walking in your room. He's looking around noting all the stuff you have in. Admiring the photographs you have of you and your dearest grandmother. He'd heard a lot of the wonderful woman that raised you when your own parents failed to do you.

He was staring at one particular picture with you and your grandmother in front of an old looking house. You're hugging her from behind, your arms wrapped around her shoulders and cheeks pressing against each other. It was a very sweet image but what caught his attention was the necklace your grandmother was wearing. It looks familiar but he couldn't remember where he last saw it. Shaking his haid he turned to look at you when you called his name. Reaching out a hand to make his walk toward your little comfy made up seat in the foot of your bed.

Slightly cold but strong arms tightening on your waist woke you up. Opening your eyes you came face to face with a firm chest. Face heating up upon remembering how you end up falling asleep on Loki's side in the third movie. You pushed yourself up a little to look at Loki's sleeping face. It's so nice to see him like this. In peace and relaxed. Smiling you traced the shape of his face admiring his beauty. God, you love him so much…

===========*implied smut warning*=======

"I love you too my sweet cookies." He huskily said as his hands went up your side caressing it in time with your tracing.

"How's your first sleepover? Sorry I fell asleep before the last movie ended." You said. "Im such a bad host." You sighed and lay your head on his chest. You felt his shake as he laughed.

"Oh you're the best host my sweetness." He said rolling so you're under him now. "Sleeping beside you and waking up with you as the first face I see. Wouldn't like it if it was anyone else. Thank you for letting me in your personal space." He said. Your heart starts beating wildly as he slowly descends his face to yours.

As his lips touched yours, you melted. Nothing matters but Loki and his touches. Your hands went around his back caressing it enjoying the feel of his skin on yours as his lips stole your breath away. You moaned as his tongue liked your lower lips asking permission. You opened your lips savouring the taste of him. He only left you to let you breathe some air, his lips attacking your neck instead, leaving little kisses from your neck to your shoulder.

"I want you…" you whispered to him. You've never been this intimate with him but something in your core crave him. Craves to feel all of him and be filled with him.

"I've desired you for too long my sweetness. And I shall have you tonight." He said as flicked his hand using his magic to make your clothes disappear.

"You and your magic." You giggled and kissed him again. Savouring the feel of his body on your. His smell, his every delicate but sinful moves and that night he fully owned you and it was like everything clicked, you became one in every sense there is. Your body and mind was two sides of a broken glass and you're whole now.

Tag list

Skin to skin: @delightfulheartdream @victias @kaogasm @marvelgirl7 @alexakeyloveloki @newdaynewyearnewlife @multifandomlife22 @the-lake-is-calling

Tom Hiddleston and Characters: @jewels2876 @jobean12-blog @CurlyRed2020

#hbc week of love #hbc #the th hbc #th hbc #loki marvel #loki x you #loki x reader fluff #loki x reader fan fic #loki god of mischief #loki laufeyson smut #loki x reader #loki imagine #loki fanfiction #zephirahnyxwrites

[amindofstone]

Match up, No. 9

@starlightbydaybright hat gefragt:

Hello! Saw you were taking match-ups and I was wondering if I could request one. Only done one before for another fandom, and I was wondering who I’d align with for One Piece ^^

I'm an INFP and generally an introvert, finding it difficult to express myself when I'm around people I'm unfamiliar with or just not close to. I can be both quiet and shy; quiet when I have no interest in making good impression on that person (a stranger I'll see once and never again) and shy when I'm genuinely trying to make myself acceptable to them. But, I do trust easily, so it's not hard to get close enough with me that I'll open up about almost everything, so long as they understand have my boundaries (that'll shift depending on how close). I'm also very affectionate with people I'm close with, particularly through physical touch, since I've been pretty touch starved. If you're close friends with me, you can find me constantly looking for a hug, but I can respect boundaries since not everyone enjoys contact.

The situation would be a bit different romance wise, since I’d revert a bit back to my introverted side, but also very affection-seeking at the same time. I say affection seeking as in I’d crave time and activities spent together with them, but I’d be afraid to ask/initiate, at least during the early beginnings of the relationship. I’d be constantly seeking affirmation of their love, and since I’ve never been in a relationship before (but desperately wanted one), they’d be constantly receiving my love too ❤️

While being an introvert in reality, I find it much easier to speak with confidence online. as I actually have time to contemplate what I can say. It's when I'm either with close friends or on the internet, that I can go on passionate endless rants or show my passive aggressive side. I'm usually pacifist, but if something irks me enough, I can and will pitch in snide/sarcastic remark or two, or if it's more serious; I will write out whole sophisticated and well worded paragraph that'd sound all polite with a hidden snarky tone.

I'm pretty much a hopeless romantic, so there's lot of couple things I want to try when I find someone. Back hugs, bridal carry, tickle fights, you name it. While I do enjoy these displays of affection (comes with the happy kind of embarrassment aka. I feel embarrassed that others sees it but I’m happy because I know they’re not doing it out of maliciousness and because they truly love me), small gestures are appreciated too; a gentle squeeze of the hand, a passing smile, etc.

As for hobbies, I enjoy reading, writing, (occasionally) drawing, but most of all; probably singing. I enjoy a wide variety of songs, depending on what mood I'm in, but I particularly like songs about love. Looking for someone to sing the duet love songs with me, doesn't matter how good or bad they are at singing. They can be tone deaf for all I care, it's the thought that matters 😊

I'm very emotionally sensitive, and can both laugh and cry easily. A random stranger online wished me good day? I'll be in good mood for awhile. Watched a 'mildly' sad movie? (Extra emphasis on mildly) I better have new box of tissue on the side just in case. It'd be nice to have someone that can either comfort me or at least tolerate my emotions, so I wouldn't be irking them 😞

I don't really have a type when looking for significant other but being an INFP does make the romance thing complicated. It'd be nice to have someone that's far along on the extroverted side (just not happy go lucky and can be serious) since, despite being introverted, I like to experience new things. I'm just too afraid to try alone and prefer it if someone else recommends it first. Someone to prompt me and nudge me to do something, but won’t take it too far if I really looked uncomfortable. (I’m also a procrastinator so they gotta find out the right ratio between pushing vs. taking it too far 😅) In relationship, I'd value trust and loyalty the most, since both are important in keeping the healthy relationship. If both sides could equally trust and be trusted, then there wouldn't be place for insecurity or fear. This ties in with another part of me being an INFP; I want a relationship that lasts forever. While it's weird to decide how long lasting the love will be early in the relationship, I don't think I can fully commit myself to someone, knowing that it'll end (through the other side falling out of love with me, finding interest in someone else, etc.) (natural causes like death are fine, even though I will still be sad 🥲)

As for appearance, I’m a 5”4 female with slightly wavy black hair that reach nearly to my waist. I don’t think I’m particularly short, but then again, every anime character seems to be straight up giants XD (Man, I was born with the wrong genes) I’m overall very plain, with black hair, brown eyes, but I’ve always been told I had pretty long eyelashes and big bright eyes. Average weight for my height, and flat chested :’)

As for the preference for gender, I’m mainly attracted to guys. I had some (very few) crushes on a small selection of female anime characters, but that were very rare, like 3, compared to my (insert large number) male crushes

Thank you in advance and sorry for how long this is 😔

P.s. I feel like I need to emphasize I’m still an introvert, since the personality I described is only limited to my very small friend group

a/n:

Hey there? How are you doing? Thank you so much for requesting. First off I should be apologizing for making you wait so long. I hope you´re not mad at me but lately there is a lot happening in my life. In my private life but also in my college life. But let´s put that aside and get to your request.

I have to thank you for the detailed info about you because that helped me to choose a match up for you so much. Like I instantly could think of someone. Not only did it help me to match you up with someone but also to come up with a plot. So I came up with this little imagine/hedcanon… I really don´t know what to call my work for the imaginies so I go with work. XD Anyways I really don´t know what to do at this point. Your request and your personality gave me such a good idea for a plot that I tried my best to keep it short because I decided to turn this request and my ideas and thoughts that are flying around in my mind to an actual FANFICTION! AHHHHHHHH. I can´t stop thinking about it. The idea sounds so damn good in my head that it makes me smile like an idiot right now! Uff I can´t wait to find time writing it down. AHAHH, but I fear that I already gave aways so much with this!!!! *pouts Doesn´t matter I´ll do it anyways. AHHHHHHHHHHH Thank you so damn much for requesting!

Anyways! Back to my work now. If there is anything that bothers you or you simply hate please make sure to tell me so I can change it and give you whatever you´d like. Other than that happy reading my dear!

Match up rules can be found HERE.

Warning(s): Maybe grammatical or spelling mistakes since English is my third language and I´m still improving in every aspect (Please have mercy on that.)

!!! Please do not steal my idea or work. Credit me if this is shared or published in any other platform or any other way. Please respect me as the writer and my work. Picture is not mine. Credits to: I sadly don't know. Please tell me of you know so I can give credits. Thank you in advance. !!!

· I decided to pair you up with KILLER

· Like am I the only person that thinks that he is not getting the screen time and appreciation he deserves? Because that is the damn case! ODA GIVE THIS MAN THE LOVE AND APPRECIATION HE DESERVES. And while we´re at it I wouldn´t mind if I would get a bit more of Eustass Kid too… Thank you in advance. <3

· But that’s not the point. Please dear requesting beautiful human being give this man and me, your hopelessly dreamy author a chance. Thank you, I really appreciate. <3

· aNyWaYssssS.

+

· “y/n? Are you still awake?”, asked the blond man softly. “No worries I won´t make you carry me to bed again.”, you said with a giggle. You couldn´t see his face but you knew that he was smiling. “I don´t mind that you know? I like having you close to me without having to fear to see you hid under the blanket for who knows how long.”, you rolled you eyes and hit his arms. “That only happened because that idiot captain of yours annoyed the hell out of me. That was embarrassing Killer.”, you slowly put one leg over the railing and then the next one. Making sure you don´t fall down the ship. “What happened? Didn´t you drag me out our cabin to watch the stars?”, asked the muscular man who held you close to him while making sure you didn´t fell. “I did but now I´d like to look at something different. Something even more beautiful. Something that gives me warmth and happiness. Something that keeps me alive and always makes sure I am doing fine.”, talking to the blond pirate while sitting at the railing was one of the rare moments you were close to an eye level with him. “You mean my mask?”, asked the man with a tiled head that got you to roll your eyes and hit his chest. “Great you destroyed the sweet moment. I hate you. Make a step back so I can get down. I want to go back to bed and drown in regret of dating you.”, you tried to push him away but he was obviously stronger and threw you over his shoulder. “Of course you hate me. That was also the exact same thing you were moaning a while ago. Let´s go back to bed nerd.”

· As sweet and loving your relationship was now with the pirate it also started like that. Wanna know how? Alright let me get comfortable in my bed and get started. Story TIIMMMEEEE!!!

· An island well known for their universities and scientist. An island full of top ranked doctors.

· Physics, chemistry, biology, astrology was well thaught in the schools of the island. An island well known around the world. An island ruled by a powerful devil fruit user.

· An island in which every civilian had a talent in another field. And you? You sadly had an impressive talent for languages.

· Why sadly you wonder? Well the amount of times you had to run for your dear life because some pirates could come and kidnap you and make you read the poneglyphs is immense.

· Once even the infamous Red haired Shanks came and asked you with the hope to have someone who could read them. But sadly you couldn´t. You told him that you were done with pirates coming for you or your best friends. You regretted learning all of that and hated yourself for that. Shanks and Beckman to whom your were talking to really felt bad for you and claimed the island as their territory after they had a chat with ruler and made a deal.

· That was that saved you and your friends for years and made you happy. You were thankful to the red hair pirates and always treated them with meals and drinks when they came visiting the island. You were happy for 5 years. 5 years until these stupid reckless pirates came.

· And now? Now you hated yourself all over again

· You knew that not every pirate was like the red hair pirates. Nice and respectful. They didn´t kill innocent people and destroyed civilizations only to get some gold and diamonds. But these? These were horrible. Cold and cruel.

· “Someone make this btch talk otherwise I´ll do it by cutting her into pieces only stropping when IT actually starts to answer my god damn questions!”, screamed a tall and guy with red hair.

· You were scared. Tied on a mast on their ship, you feared for your life. Screaming for help was not an option since you were already on the sea since a while now.

· The man that was yelling at you none stop was now holding a blond man with a mask at his collar and growling at him. The man might have a mask on but you somehow had the feeling that he was talking to the man with the red fur coat. “Clear the deck! NOW!!”; yelled the man before he left inside the ship. Slowly every man on deck was leaving you alone. You wanted to ask them were or why the left but you knew that they wouldn´t give you an answer. You were a prisoner. A captive. A pathetic human they took on board. With the last pirate leaving you behind, a door that was located behind the mast you were tied on closed while the need to cry grew inside of you. How long am I here by now? One hour? Two or three? Was anyone missing me back at home? Were they already looking for me? Thoughts that occupied your mind were blurring your vision. You were looking right in front of you but also not. Your eyes were wide open but your vision was back at home. Home were you belonged.

· “Hey. Hey can you hear me? Hey you alright, woman? Hello?”, a man was squatting in front of you and waving with his hands in front of your face. You were deeply lost in your thoughts that you neither heard him coming nor saw him sitting right in front of you.

· But the moment he touched you tight you screamed and got back to reality. “Please don´t touch me. Please don´t hurt me. Please I beg you. Please.”, fear was written all over your face. You saw yourself death with a huge puddle of your blood. “Alright I won´t touch you. It´s just that I´ve been sitting in front of you for 5 minutes now and the only thing you did was breath and say no. Anyways here is something to drink. You´ve been her for four hours now. Half of the time unconscious and the other one either basically mute or in a trance.”, the guy in front of you was the same one who got the mad man to leave and clear the deck. It made you wonder who he was that he had such a power but you didn´t dare to ask. “Here I hold it for you and you drink.”, the glass was put on your lips and you drank. You didn´t knew how thirsty you were until your lungs were wetted by the water. Finished drinking he put a blanket over your legs since the position your were in didn´t allow you to cover yourself properly. And the fact that you were wearing a dress wasn´t helping at all.

· “Alright. You had something to drink I got you a blanket now tell me are you able to talk to me and answer my questions?”, you nodded. “Good. Now listen to me. There is this language that is called Krisanasy. As far as I know there is a tiny amount of people who are able to speak that and you are one of these. Am I right?”, you nodded. “How well are you in it?”, you gulped and looked at the man with the mask “I know the most important basics. I remember basic grammar rules and a good amount of vocabulary but I´m not that good in it. I didn´t worked with anything that included this language since years now.”, the masked man nodded and fully sat down now. “Would you be able to get back in it if you had some books and scripts to work with?”, slowly you understood where this was supposed to lead. You knew that if you said yes they would keep you as their prisoner and make your work for them. And if they had everything they would kill you because there would be no more use for you. But if you said no now and refused to talk to him he would probably also kill you. You were in a dilemma. You didn´t wanted to die but also didn´t wanted to die after you helped them. They were criminals. Feared and hated by the government and any human around the world. You looked down on your lap and let your head fall forward so your long black hair covered your face. “Hey I asked you something. Would you be able to do that?”, his voice was deep and rough but in the same time soft and gentle. That irritated you. it make you realize that him being nice to you now was just a way to get under your skin and make you do whatever they wanted. And then they simply would kill you in the most brutal and cruel way. “Hey, woman. Are you listening?”, you felt helpless. “I don´t want to die. Please let me go. Please. I beg you. Please.”, tears were streaming down you cheeks you couldn´t hold back anymore. He came closer and lifted you face. “Listen here you are a smart woman. Stop crying for fcks sake. If I would be you I would have made these pirates work for me. Use your damn brain and stop crying. Do you really think anyone in here would kill you? Heck no! They need your help. They need your brain because all of them are basically stupid. Like damn I need you to answer all of my questions before my captain with anger issues comes and beats the sht out of me. Now answer me woman. Are you able to get back in it if we got you some scripts to work on?”, you nodded while more tears streamed down you cheeks. You felt pathetic. You felt worthless and used. Helping them would turn you into a criminal too and ruin everything you worked on. Everything the emperor did for you and the island would be wasted. “See wasn’t that hard to answer.”

· The questioning went on for a while you didn´t know for how long but you knew that a long time passed since the sun stared to set. “Alright. Now I give you two options. One, stay here. Tied up on the mast no matter what kind of weather we face. Two you swear to obey me no matter what kind of order I give you and you will be able to sleep on a bed. You will get food and tomorrow you will start working on the scripts we give you. You choose.”, with your head hung lowly you said number two and instantly got released from the chains and handcuffs. He helped you stand up and covered you in the blanket before he led you into his cabin. “Wait here. Sit there and don´t do anything stupid as long as I´m not here. If you do anything stupid I won´t be able to help you. Got it?”, he didn´t even wait until you answered or gave any reaction he simply left and closed the door after him. So you waited while sitting with a lowly hung head. Minutes passed and he came back. “Your clothes are dirty. The bathroom is empty so you can take a bath or shower. Anything you want but I´ll be in the room with you. Because of one I have to make sure no one is coming in and secondly to watch over you and make sure you don´t do anything stupid. Got it. Fine. Take this towel and these clothes. We don´t have any female crewmates so you have to be wearing with my clothes until we dock on another island and you get to buy clothes.”

· The man with the mask took care of you for the rest of the day. He took you to shower and gave you fresh clothes. You had dinner with him alone in the kitchen when no one was around and got back to sleep. And no matter what you did he made sure to keep a respectful distance towards you. Whenever he had to come closer or touch you to take care of your wounds he would warn you. The day kept going like that. Nothing else was said about the following days and the thing they wanted you for. Only necessary things were said that were needed at the moment. And you only gave short replays or only answered with a head movement.

· Slowly the day passed by and the night took over with the moon putting the world alight. You were back in his cabin with him sitting on an armchair and you lying in bed sleeping with one hand tied up on the bed.

#one piece #one piece imagine #one piece x y/n #one piece x reader #one piece x you #one piece x oc #one piece matchup #one piece kid pirates #one piece eustass kid #one piece killer #kid pirates #killer one piece #anime matchup #match up event #eustass kid #eustass captain kid #match ups #match up requests #killer x reader #killer #one piece headcanons #one piece scenario #one piece oneshot #one piece fanart #one piece anime

[my-brothers-corrupted]

I've been doing a reread and I just want to say how much I like the scene in Singapore where we see Anti's pictures he's hung up of the missing boys. They really show how he sees them in relation to himself. Red is his protector, his fighter, Doktor is his torture weapon, but also just a thing that looks prettier bloody, and Dapper is his sweet, submissive baby brother, criss-cross like Red taught him. If he were to choose a favourite photo of Trick and Blue, what would they be?

hey sorry my tumblr was broken for a second like i mentioned on my main and i forgot I had messages!! thanks for asking that's a great question!! yeah Anti keeps lots of photos because he's a little weird like that, part of the reason he has physical photos in that chapter is because his powers are on the fritz and so it's harder for him to look at the images he basically has saved in his head.

if he lost Trick and Blue somehow... well he didn't really care about Trick until about chapter three when Dapper and the others were gone and Anti began to notice and crave his loyalty. So I think a picture of Trick that he would choose to put up would be one of the two of them together, maybe even something that just looks like a normal selfie between friends or something. like Trick hugging him and taking a picture of them. or just pictures of Trick on his own, looking all content and comfy, because Anti is choosing to perceive him as genuinely enjoying his time with Anti. he comes to savor that about Trick. Trick makes him feel very genuinely wanted, while with Dapper their history means he's always very aware that he has to crush Jameson into Dapper to get him to stay and cooperate. Dapper's a pet to Anti through and through, with moments of brotherhood thrown in there - Trick becomes a brother to Anti, and then as Anti tightens his grip on him and relies on him more, that's when Anti begins to see him more as a pet again. something you have to cage up and train instead of someone human who is allowed to make their own choices about their relationship with you.

and the thing with Blue is that Anti doesn't really have any affection for him at all. what Anti enjoys about Blue is that he is a broken, subjugated version of Marvin - the fact that Blue is a reminder of Marvin's defeat is what Anti loves about him. his pictures of Blue would be some creepy shit. stuff like Blue sleeping or beat up. it's not the sort of thing I try to go into too much cause it gets too creepy... it's very sadistic but remembering how he defeated the others is what makes Anti feel safe and powerful and like he won't be abandoned. get a THERAPIST Anti

thank you for asking!!! I hope you are enjoying your reread and sorry for my late response :D

#creepy tw #? not sure how to tag it aha

[demyrie]

I've seen you talk a lot about love language, and it's something I'm slowly but steadily learning. I have a question about it! What can you do if you know someone who has a very incompatible love language with you, or who reacts poorly to your love language? Multiple times now I've had friends who would get almost hostile towards my ways of showing care, and its so upsetting to me that i sometimes stop being friends with them. It then makes it hard for me to show my love to other people (1/2)

Oh what a wonderful question. I adorelove languages as a concept, because they’re as diverse as the peoplewho “speak” them. Which might be why ... this definitely turned into an essay.

First off, sweet thing!! I’m sorry tohear that you’re getting that kind of reaction from your displays ofaffection! It can be really, really discouraging to be brave and openup to somebody, or offer affection, and get backlash or a negativeresponse … it does teach us that maybe there’s something wrong with what we’re doing, but you have to remember what dialect of love languagepeople are coming from and what your affection might “look” liketo them out of context.

Speaking Across Love Languages: It’sKind of Like the Dog and the Potato!

In case you haven’t seen this wonderfulthing that originated on tumblr, it’s a therapy dog who brings her crying person a potato, andit’s crushed hearts around the internet because of this generalhilarious sentiment: I don’t need it, but thanks it means the world inthis awful, awful moment.

And it’s funny, because animals offertheir love or care language and while it often doesn’t translate(thank you cat but I did not want this dead worm? Ok?), we are ableto gush and cry and appreciate the pure and whole effort itself,in and out of context, because “they don’t know any better”or “they’re just doing them dude” but we don’t offer the sameunderstanding to the people in our lives.

People learn affection in differentways and it differs greatly based on not only culture, but all theabundances and lackings you’ve experienced in life. We are programmedfrom an early age to value what we value, when oxytocin is runninghot through our developing little brains and wiring it with themental-emotional-chemical definition of LOVE that will follow usthrough our days, for better or worse. It can make both giving and accepting affectioncomplicated.

What Matters to You?

Make no mistake, many walk on this Earth without a clue what their love language is. To some that come from physicallyaffectionate households, cuddling and physical closeness is theheight of comfort. I love a good hug and I cuddle like a champ. Topeople who come from homes where they were rarely touched, however,being given a Classic American Comfort Hug might invoke anxiety …or they might crave it more than anything because they never had itwhile young.

To others, maybe their parents madethem food when they were sad and so cooking and the effort of itmakes them feel loved and cherished (see: my dude). To some, likemy dad, valuing someone’s time is the greatest sign of respect, andif you showed up late for something you may as well have spit in hisface. Conversely, the most important thing to these folks is justDOING things together. Doesn’t matter what, just time, and time spenttogether, is what matters, which perplexes Personalized Affectionpeople like me, who are left wondering why the fuck dad asked me tocome to home depot with him with no explanation because he’s takingtime away from the gift picture I was drawing for him???? which by the wayhe won’t show “proper” appreciation for, because really he justwanted to lurk around home depot with me. 

(My dad is weird.)

Love Language and Miscommunications

So, something bad happens, we wantcomfort, and the people around us don’t respond the way we want themto. They don’t hug us, or say what we want them to say, and we takeit super personally and feel jilted or abandoned. We think, whyaren’t they comforting me, why are they purposefully ignoring ordenying me, without considering that people learn and enact comfortin different ways and under no circumstances can they read your mindand desires.

(I’m gonna share an epithet from Rae andmy struggles, as I’m sure she won’t mind.)

There was a time in Undergrad when @rainbowstarbirdrealized, in the process of discovering that we were indeed quitefucking depressed and mentally ill, that we were living in completelydifferent worlds. Our repressed personal problems fit together like avery awful tessellation of trauma that dug deeper and deeper withevery year: I feared being smothered and controlled and she fearedbeing abandoned, so every time I pulled away in fear, she ran forwardin fear, with both of us having no idea why we were getting so angryat each other, or why we felt like we were constantly in danger despite beinghonors students and on scholarship and good life and affordable housing and etc etc.

My comforting love language has alwaysbeen providing things for people and taking care of their physicalbodies. We were still struggling to be friends through all this and Ialso leaned heavily on my role as caretaker in order to divertattention from my own pain, so if Rae was upset, I would make herfood or tea or just ask if she was hungry. Rae, on the other hand,dissociates severely when triggered and the only thing that cananchor her is physical touch, and her top priority is having a lovedone sit and spend time with her to prove she’s not alone and hated.

Worst Case Scenario: Lost inTranslation

I come in and Rae is a lump on thecouch. The air is thick with some kind of tension, which Iimmediately interpret as personal resentment and I get triggered as shit bythe ongoing mental tape of everything you do isn’t enough, but I recognizethat she isn’t feeling good. I ask her if she’s hungry. She says no,and doesn’t say anything further because she’s afraid of being needyand giving me the chance to deny her and confirm her fears that yes i hate her okay bye. I, at a loss, say I’m gonnamake her tea, because I want to take care of her in some way.

So I head into the kitchen and leaveher alone and suffering on the couch, saying, in her language, that Idon’t care about her one goddamn bit. I come back with a mug ofuseless caffeine that she didn’t need, which she doesn’t drink, whichupsets me because she’s refusing my love language, which makes mefuck right off to my bedroom to fume because well I tried,leaving her alone again. Everyone suffers. And I mean everyone.

(so much suffering)

What the Hell Happened?

She prioritized time, which I wasn’tgiving her, because I didn’t just want to sit on the couch next toher and be awkward and useless, I wanted to help her (ie: do something for her).I prioritized actions and gestures, which she saw as incidentalthings, human shrapnel, and rejected because she had no use for themwhile so deep in her own belief that she wasn’t loved because Iwouldn’t even sit next to her and keep her company while she was obviously in pain. 

See how fuckedthat is? We were not only failing to speak one another’s languages, but our actual languages ended up triggering each other. Bad. Bad!!!!

Now, the first thing I do is ask if shewants a hug! I tell her I will sit with her for as long as she needs,whether we’re playing video games or whatever, and reaffirm that Ilove her and value her. Now, when I’m in a State, she’ll ask if I’veeaten, because she knows the first thing I do when I start dipping isskipping meals to punish myself. She brings me tea and badgers meabout food, and of course cuddles me to kingdom come, and mostimportantly she smartly, altruistically, and respectfully asks mewhat would make me feel loved in that moment, and goddamn if that doesn’t make me feel loved in and of itself.

Becoming Fluent in Another’s LoveLanguage

The key is realizing your companions’love language and understanding how it fits into your own, if itdoes. If your partner’s language differs from yours, you can eitherappeal to them using their love language or try to recognize how whatthey’re doing for you expresses their values and try to be cognizantof those actions. In my mind, taking the effort to learn yourpartner’s love language is the height of devotion and appreciationand wooing.

It is such a powerful thing to say“this makes me feel loved!” or “This is really important to me,which is why I thought you might like it!” It feels … selfish,almost, or egotistical, but with affection you are offering ofyourself. There’s room for you to be involved!

And there is no “wrong” way to loveor show affection! The only way things go wrong is if your unmetexpectations are hurting you, in which case you might need toreevaluate either where those expectations came from or the personyou’re with and the way they treat you (EX: wanting someone to checkin with you 20 times a day with “i love you you amazing creature”texts is on a different level of expectations from I would like mypartner to listen to me when I talk and she doesn’t, am I beingoutrageous?) or if the person you’re wooing is upset by the wayyou’re showing affection. For instance, some people don’t like hugs,and it takes two to hug, and sometimes it just bes like that. Find what makes them feel loved (which is also something you are comfortable and happy doing)!

It may take a little bit ofnegotiation, and it’s difficult at first whenever enacting somebody’slove language doesn’t “do” it for you, and of course youshouldn’t force yourself to do something that feels gross to you toplease another person (nononononononono), but we are very plastic, trainable creatures.I get what I call feedback happiness whenever I do something I knowmeans the world to Rae, even if it doesn’t push my buttons, and shetakes pride in knowing that I like tea when I’m sad, etc, and that inthose moments my love language takes priority because I’m in need, and that I’m worth it. 

Effort is love, sometimes. Most times, really, but the high is worthit :)

All This to Say: Get Talking!

It definitely sounds like there’s somebarriers or misunderstandings between you and those you’d like to befriends with … I remember back in the day, glomping was the heightof affection theatre and I fucking hated it (v sensitive about my neck and also fast motions and loud noises), but didn’t know how toask my friends to stop because I thought it was that or They Hate Me. I don’t believe there’s anyone you “justcan’t be friends with”, but you do have to sit back at a certainpoint and ask yourself if any relationship is fulfilling you enoughto continue it. If you aren’t finding pleasure and excitement in thebond or there’s no good compromise/effort between you to work on it,it may not be a priority to pursue.

So, I’d ask my friends – hey, youknow last time I did X, I wasn’t trying to scare you or make youuncomfortable. I guess I wanted to become closer, and that’s whatcloser means to me. Is there a way I can show you affection thatdoesn’t throw you off? What do you like to do? What makes you feelspecial? (Because I would like to make you feel special.) Encouragethem to talk about what they like and let them understand that you’re willing to go out of your way to communicate your love in a way they’ll Feel and Hear, and there’s pretty much no better feeling in the world than knowing someone likes you like that.

I’m sorry this turned into an essaybut!!! Important!!! I wish you the best of luck my love, know thatthere’s nothing wrong with you or how you relate, but that relatingtakes two, and takes time! Seek to understand what might be stopping them from seeing your affection for what it is, and come up with a compromise or shared language you CAN utilize. 

I hope this increases your happiness and worth and makes you feel great because thats what friendships should do! Murr!

#trauma #love language #relating #mental health #depression #important #demyrie talks #figuring out a shared love language #Anonymous

[zutaraverse]

Chapter 8: Finding The Right Path

Chapter 8 of Blood, Chi and Full Moons: Find previous chapters here or: Chapter 1 Part 1 | Chapter 1 Part 2 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 Part 1 | Chapter 3 Part 2 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 7 Part 1 | Chapter 7 Part 2

"Aren't you a little young to know what that kind of heartbeat means?" retorted Katara with a nervous laugh, composing herself while Zuko was still opening and closing is mouth like a gaping fish. Toph had just metal bent her way into his private arena while he and Katara were getting more than comfortable in one another's arms.

Toph stood taller than either had seen her, and had lost much of her childish fat, leaving her much thinner and more shapely than before. Her figure could even be described as delicate when she wore some of her traditional dresses — but she was rarely seen to do so.

"Ha!" she replied, flicking her head so that some of her bangs moved from her face, "I'm fifteen…Tell me Sugar Queen, how old were you with Jet?" Toph grinned broadly. She already knew she had won this.

"I… That's beside the point! It was war, we could have died any day!" defended Katara, feeling her face redden.

"Yeah well, Sweetness, you weren't the only one who grew up during the war — we're all children of conflict here and we all grew up far too fast. But, whatcha gonna do about it - I was never going to get my kicks from normal things! Might as well enjoy what we've got - I see you two are taking that on board," she said nonchalantly but with a strange drawn expression hovering over her features.

It was true. All of them had been thrown into a world that adults found hard to navigate. They were all too young and too innocent — but somehow, against all odds, they had survived. But surviving had cost them their innocence and their childhood. There they stood, considering their lives and the way they had been affected. Toph, 15 years old, had fought against her parents' captivity and left home at 12. Katara, now 17, had taken her mother's place at far too young an age. Zuko, 19, had never felt his father's love and had been banished at the age of 13. The start of each of their journeys had thrown them together at the hardest of times. None of them could relate to a normal child's found solace in other people like themselves, but mostly in one another. There was no need for explanations for their sadness when they remembered the war, nor pity when they confessed what had happened to them. Simply understanding and camaraderie.

They snapped out of their reverie as Katara approached Toph and threw her arms around her. Surprisingly, Toph didn't squirm away as she usually did - instead she hugged her back tightly, feeling tears prickling behind her eyes. She had missed them. This was her true family after all.

"I'm glad you have clothes on Sweetness! Not that I would have minded…" she added. Katara considered the girl in front of her.

"Do you play for both sides Toph?" asked Katara, slightly surprised. She had never noticed this preference in her friend before.

"Mmmm you could say that. You want to watch out Fire Prince Sparky," she giggled, winking at him. "Right, well I will leave you to get decent and meet you in that room with all the cushions and tea," she said confidently. "I'll take my hug from you when you are less… ah… preoccupied with other things… Bye!" and with that she bent her way out the same way she came.

"I'm fine now!" Zuko called after her. He was still standing where he and Katara had been embraced, and looked stunned at the exchange that had just happened. Since when had these girls he had grown up with become so open and confident about their sexuality?

Katara walked back to him, apparently at ease now, and wrapped her arms around him for a quick kiss.

"Katara you know I can't stay long with you and Toph… I've got those reports from the colonies to get through," he said regretfully. Although he would have preferred it if Toph had not interrupted them, spending time with the two girls was second on his list of things he would rather be doing.

"No, I understand. At least stay for a cup of tea?" she asked, looking up at him hopefully. He kissed her nose gently.

"One cup," he promised. Katara smiled up at him. "Why do we always get interrupted though!" he moaned as they walked out of the arena. "I build a fucking impenetrable metallic arena and of course the world's only metal bender has to arrive," he grumbled half to himself.

Zuko couldn't keep his one-cup-of-tea promise before being called away, leaving Toph and Katara alone to catch up.

"So, Sweetness, heard what happened with you and that general…" started Toph. She was never one to be subtle about hard conversations. Katara sighed, forcing down another gulp of tea.

"It was a captain. How did you hear about that?" she asked quietly. Toph shrugged.

"News spreads pretty quickly when you know what to listen for. Although I think the story may have been exaggerated somewhat… One version makes you some merciful saviour while the next tells of the bloodthirsty water bender! Did you really skewer him with an icicle eight feet long?" She was leaning forward now, all interest and excitement. Katara let out the breath she had been holding quietly - Toph wanted to talk about the Agni Kai, not the reason for it.

"No, I did not! I did trap him in a ball of water suspended in the air until he almost drowned…" Toph made an appreciative noise, "But I didn't kill him - I spared him his life. His admiral killed him when he had lost and still attacked me. You aren't supposed to do that in an Agni Kai and apparently its a big deal."

"You didn't kill him? Why? He fucking deserved it!" grumbled Toph, slightly put out by the lack of violence.

"It was supposed to be a political move; as in if he could rot in a deep, dark jail for the rest of his life then people might get the message that it is not alright and not pass it off as personal revenge… as it turned out, though, the admiral's finale brought much more attention to the situation. I hope it sends a message," she explained bitterly.

"I think it did. There are little girls all over wanting to be you! They were doing it all wrong though, I had to teach them to be more bossy!" Toph grinned as Katara punched her playfully in the arm.

"How are you though Toph? What have you been doing?"

"Eh, this and that. Mama and papa Bei Fong have finally accepted the fact that I'm my own person, so at least that is sorted out." Toph took a sip of her tea.

"That's wonderful Toph! Its good you can go back to your family. You really missed them," encouraged Katara, not without sadness at the thought of the split in her own family since she had met her father in the North Pole.

"They still need work, but I'm happy about it. Other than that I've just been travelling and rebuilding. I spent a lot of time in Omashu with Bumi - I love that guy! He's amazing! And… eh… yeah. I can't compete in the Earth Rumble anymore because apparently 'it isn't a competition if you always win'," Toph made a face, "Those stupid cowardly bastards! I'll tell you what though, I'm sort of craving something long to do. I've… I've not been happy recently. Maybe happy isn't the right word. Maybe 'content' is a better word. I just feel like there is something missing," she looked down at her hands, a sadness lining her features that made her look much, much older than she was.

"Oh Toph," said Katara quietly, reaching out and taking her hand.

"Its alright. I'm not the type to give in… I just… I guess I'm just a little lost," she admitted, a familiar lump rising in her throat. Somewhere in the back of Toph's mind a younger version of herself was horrified at her breaking down in front of Katara - but a wiser version told her that Katara was probably the only person who could help her. She had been more of a mother to her than her own mother, and she needed someone - anyone - to understand. Katara had gone through shit, so she would probably get it… right? "I just, I don't know if I can ever find a path again," she continued, letting tears slide out of her sightless eyes. "Its as if everything is dull - like I'm feeling everything through sand and I'm stumbling around in the middle of nowhere!" she choked out. She felt Katara shift and found herself wrapped in the older girl's arms.

"I know how it feels," she cooed into Toph's black hair, "everything is distant and you can't connect to reality. You feel like you've been swallowed up somewhere and you might never feel the sunlight on your skin again. You are cold even in the sweltering heat, and physical pain hardly affects you at all. You try everything to force some life back into your system but nothing works." Toph nodded into her shoulder, overcome by an intense gratefulness for Katara's understanding.

"But you are still here Toph, and you will get through this. It is horrible and affects every part of your life, but I'll help you. Stay here for a while? Zuko and I know very well how you are feeling. You shouldn't be alone right now," she continued gently, rocking Toph in her arms.

"Thank you K—Katara!" sobbed Toph, shaking in her arms.

"Hey, thats what we do for family," she whispered, her own throat closing at her words.

Toph had fallen asleep instantly after her exhausting day. Katara listened for her light snoring at her door before walking past and heading for Zuko's rooms. She knocked but received no answer, and so peaked in to find the room still dark and uninhabited. Quietly, she entered, shutting the door behind her and lighting the candles adorning the room.

It was late. Where was he?

She looked around his room and settled in one of the armchairs to wait. However, as time ticked on, she became uncomfortable and drifted to the large double bed. She lay down on it - just to see what it was like - she told herself. As soon as her head touched the soft pillow, though, she too fell asleep.

Zuko finished reading through the uselessly detailed reports very late into the night. He made a note to hire somebody to go through the reports for him and only hand him the ones that were worth reading. Sighing, he put out the lights and wondered towards his room. He frowned. There was light coming from under his door…

Slowly, he crept to the room and pushed the door ajar quietly to peak in. He relaxed as he took in the half melted candles and a sleeping Katara on his bed. He felt an inexplicable surge of pride at the sight of her in his bed. Zuko hovered in the doorway, unsure whether to take her back to her room or to leave her sleeping as she was. He bit his lip. He should ask.

Gently, he tapped her shoulder and called her name. Her eyes cracked open, before she realised where she was and she sat up blinking away the cobwebs of sleep.

"I didn't mean to wake you completely - I just wanted to know if you wanted to stay here or if you wanted me to take you back to your room?" he asked, taking in the image of a sleepy, messy-haired Katara with amusement.

"I… We need to talk Zuko," she said, yawning.

"I think we should wait till tomorrow morning - you look like you're about to nod back off!" he said mockingly, taking off his outer robes and shoes.

Katara shook her head.

"No, we need to talk now while Toph is asleep!" she insisted. He sighed and sat cross legged across from her on the bed, waiting to hear what she had to say. A part of him was disappointed that she only wanted to talk, but he smothered that train of thought.

"Toph is depressed. Seriously depressed or she wouldn't have talked to me about it. I'm very worried about her Zuko. She was so young during the war!" Zuko sighed.

"We were all young during the war, Katara," he reminded her.

"Yes, I know. But we have all found some sort of a path; you as Fire Prince, Sokka as future Chief, Suki as Kyoshi Leader and future Cheifess, Aang as restorer of the Air Nation and me with this whole research thing. We've had our down times but we've all created something to keep ourselves occupied, to fill the void opened up during the fighting. Toph hasn't. All her projects were short term and she's lost, left to face her demons with no distractions. We need to do something!"

Zuko considered her words. She was right. Toph was possibly the most powerful and yet the most lost one of all of them. And she was still so young!

"She can stay here for as long as she likes, just to calm down and find her way?" he suggested. And Iroh would adore having her around.

"I was… see I was thinking, what if we - uh - taught her?" Zuko's eyes widened in realisation.

"Do you think that's wise? I mean its already a risk that there are two of us practicing fire and water every day!" And , he added mentally, we wouldn't get to have fun on our own!

"I've been thinking about it a lot. Yue said that not everybody is like us and that we are drawn to one another like the tides. Well, the tides are turning with everything I have discovered and everything we have learned. And suddenly Toph appears wanting some reason, some mission, some meaning to who she is. When I teach you blood bending you will be able to feel it too, but she is just as strong as either of us, you know. I've been observing and not everybody is like this; the other fire benders have sort of chi pooled in the areas typical of fire bending. That means that even if I were to redirect their chi flow, hardly any would reach the other patterns. You and I, though, we have equal amounts of chi flowing throughout - and so does Toph. I don't know why. I've been thinking about this since we spoke to Yue…" she trailed off, looking to him for his reaction.

Zuko considered it. To learn earth bending would be incredible. It would give Toph something about herself she never knew, and it would further whatever this was Yue was letting them do. On the other hand, the more people knew, the more people risked finding out. Although, Toph was as tough as they came and would defend their secret to the end.

"Don't you think it is a little dangerous teaching a blind girl to shoot fire?" he asked. It wasn't an objection exactly - just a consideration. He had already accepted Katara's proposal.

"I've been thinking about that too; the way you felt the heat in the room today - it was like I feel the moisture. If there is anything Toph is good at it is feeling things she can't see. Maybe she wouldn't have to bend fire - she could learn to understand heat like she learned to understand earth."

"It would give her a new way to see," he said, half to himself. Katara nodded. Zuko sucked in a breath, screwing up his courage. They were walking a very thin, very dangerous line as it was.

"When do we start," he asked. Katara looked relieved at his acceptance.

"Well there is no point starting tomorrow - we would have hardly slept and we need all the concentration we can get! Maybe tomorrow we can talk to her about everything. She might not want to be a part of this, after all. And then if she does we can start the day after?"

"You're right. She won't be responsive until lunch though, so we can talk her through things then?" he reasoned. Katara nodded in agreement and smiled at him.

Zuko frowned as something occurred to him. "You know its not actually that late right? We could still get enough sleep to do our routine…" he suggested. Secretly, he wanted to spend some time alone with her before Toph started interrupting everything.

"I know what the time is. I was kind of thinking that if I stayed here tonight we probably wouldn't end up getting so much sleep. But if you'd rather train, I can go now," she said lightly, turning as if to leave.

"No, no!" he cried, a little too quickly. Ah yes, the good old show-her-how-desperate-you-are-trick. Well done, Zuko. You sound even more pathetic then usual! He cleared his throat awkwardly. "I mean, who needs training right? I don't, in fact, I can function really well without any…"

He was cut off by Katara's laugh and the now-familiar sensation of her lips on his. Pulling her close and under the covers, he snuffed out the candles with a flick of his wrist and decided that his bed was far better with her in it.

Neither really remembered how they had got to their underwear, nor did they care where their discarded clothes had disappeared to. Zuko ran his hands all over her exposed skin, memorising the patterns of her body; the feel of her ribs through her skin, the arch of her back, the curves of her legs as they wrapped around him. He felt Katara doing the same, but she seemed to enjoy the feeling of his chest and stomach most of all. He rolled them so she was on top of him and she could have access as much as she liked. She seemed to enjoy it.

It was slightly unfair that his chest was exposed and hers wasn't. No, unfair was the wrong expression. It was simply annoying. He wondered how far he could go before she asked him to stop. However, when she started kissing his jawline and letting her teeth graze his skin, he decided it was worth trying.

He ran his fingers all around her top wrappings, trying to find an opening, but cursed under his breath when he couldn't find it. Katara had stilled under his touch and was laughing slightly at his fumbling fingers. Gently, she took one of his hands and guided it to the middle of the front of the wrappings, letting him feel the slight bulge of the coiled cloth. He pinched it and pulled, letting the rest unravel and be pushed aside.

Zuko regretted having snuffed the candles. He wanted to see her! But there would be time for that, he hoped, at another point. The important thing now was that she was comfortable. Slowly, she lowered herself so she was once again lying on top of him, but this time instead of the rough cloth, he could feel her warm breasts pressed against him. He caressed them gently, savouring their softness on his fingertips. He decided to change their position again so she was below him and he could explore her with his tongue. Her nipples hardened under his kisses, and in a daring move he trailed his lips lower.

Suddenly, he encountered rough skin where there had been only smooth before. It took him a split second to realise these were her burns! He gently explored the whole area, ignoring her stiffening at his attention. There were lots, he realised with dismay. Many more than the ones he had half-glimpsed that day in training. They stretched across her whole width, just underneath her breasts - many were small, some were larger, but he knew they would all have burned just the same.

He carefully kissed as many burns as he could find, feeling her relaxing under his touch. It struck him as though this were destined to happen ever since she touched his scar underneath Ba Sing Se. She had offered to heal him and he was doing his best to heal her now.

She gently pulled on his shoulders to signal to him to rise back up her body, and kissed him with a ferocity he had not felt from her before. He vaguely noticed that her face was slightly damp with salty tears as she caressed the burned side of his face.

They did not go any further together, not wanting to ruin the beauty of the moment with something that may turn out to be emotionally disastrous. That was more than fine though, this was far more than either had ever expected to experience.

Tired but more comfortable than either had been in a long time, they fell asleep curled in one another's arms.

#zutara #zutaraverse #blood chi and full moons #atla #avata #avatar the last airbender #fanfiction

[tannie-bell]

y’all it’s soft wishful hours rn

#i apologize if it gets too sappy lol #but like...... #i just want a boy i can snuggle with and be completely comfortable with #like no pressure to be or look a particular way......nothing sexy or anything #just....hold me and give me forehead kisses and let me curl into you and be cute and maybe a tad bit pouty #let me nuzzle your neck and we can mutually shower each other w/ affection #i'm really craving physical affection rn #it's probably just the period hormones......but still #it sound really nice #bc like my family has never been super affectionate physically #like we've done the routine 'hugs & kisses' type stuff but nothing more extensive than that #so i grew up not showing a lot of phys affection bc it wasn't....'normal' i guess?? also bc i went through a SUPER anti-anything-girly phase #so for me to suddenly start being physically affectionate would r e a l l y throw my friends and fam off-guard....i think they'd accept it #it would just be really awkward for a while haha.......and i don't like awkwardness #and i've always had a suspicion that phys affection is one of my 'love languages' but never had any 'proof' so to say lol #until i started watching my baby cousin and i got used to holding her and loving on her #and i think i've been having withdrawals lol bc i've had lots of wishful thoughts lately that i normally wouldn't have #and the majority of them are related to affection lol #anyways! #this has been sappy hours with tannie! #tune in next time for even more wishful thinking! #tannie talks