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#I've never physically exerted myself to the point where I thought I might fall over before
pangur-and-grim · 2 years
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I didn't want to talk about it until the whole horrible thing was over, but Wednesday slipped out an open door last week and (with the help of a motion-activated camera on the porch) we finally got him back last night!
he’s acting so sweet and cuddly today, it’s clear how happy he is to be home and safe inside.
#god though the day it happened was so scary#I've never physically exerted myself to the point where I thought I might fall over before#but we thought he might be hiding under a car so I walked around the neighbourhood  from 8pm to 11:30pm checking under cars#which was sometime a bending/squatting motion if the car was high enough off the ground#and sometimes involved actually lying on the ground if it was a fancy low-rise car#I very quickly grew to loathe the low-rise car#but yeah I still getting back into shape after the 6 month book contract so doing 3 and half hours straight of adrenaline-fuelled squats was#very inadvisable. for three days afterward I had a hard time bending my legs bc of the muscle pain#but like literally did not notice the exertion while it was happening bc I was in 'oh fuck we need to find this cat' mode#we ended up plastering the neighbourhood in signs and pestering all our neighbours#which lead to several texted sightings that let us know he wasnt straying far from the house#so we set up a raccoon trap on the porch that DID NOT WORK#like he kept getting inside and eating all the food without tripping the trap?#so we'd adjust the sensitivity and the same thing would happen 💀 shitty trap#on night 5 we set up a motion activated camera so that we could make sure it was him eating the food#and holy shit. the stress of seeing him on the camera and not being able to open the door and grab him bc we knew he'd run and not come back#we literally WATCHED HIM ON THE CAM enter the trap and eat all the food without triggering it#and then he sat on the steps and groomed his face for 8 minutes straight while we whispered about what to do#eventually when he left the porch and started walking off we decided we could open the door without scaring him#(bc he was far enough away)#and so my housemate did that and started calling his name and opening cans of wet food to make the Good Food Sound#and holy shit. it worked#when we heard him meow back it was such a relief#they were such horrible distressed meows that we thought something had happened to injure him#but I think he was just vocalizing the emotions of being lost for 5 days and finally hearing his owner's voice#it took a few more minutes of coaxing for him to actually enter the house#he was a stray before my housemate took him in so the fear instinct is STRONG#but now today he's been cuddling up to us and letting us hold him for way longer than normal#and like I'm trying not to anthromorphise. but he's clearly so so happy to be back home and with the people he knows
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lostinthewiind · 3 years
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Piss Off Your Parents - Part 9
Ukai Keishin - Haikyuu
Synopsis: freshly turned 18, you want to prove to your parents that you aren’t a child for them to push around anymore. First, get a job at the local corner store. Second, use the store owner’s 26-year-old son with piercings and a cigarette addiction to piss your parents off. Third, accidentally fall in love.
Rating: PG13
Warnings: arguing, harsh language, swearing
Song → 18 by Anarbor
Previous → Part 8
Next → Part 10
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The trek up the stairs from the store to the apartment felt like climbing a never-ending escalator that was going the wrong way. After the day you had had, you were both mentally and physically exhausted and ready to call it a night early.
Thankfully, as if you had finally hit a stroke of luck that day, Keishin had texted you saying that he would pick up dinner on the way home, saving you the exertion of having to leave the apartment again. So, with that information in mind, you kicked off your shoes for the day and fell unceremoniously onto the couch in the living room.
As you sat down, you heard the envelope in your back pocket crinkle and the sudden noise seemed to completely fill the otherwise silent apartment.
Ah yes, the envelope.
Pulling the decision to your future out of your back pocket, you stared at it for what felt like another hour or so. No matter how long you held the envelope in your hands, you couldn't force yourself to open it. You simply didn't want to.
At some point between when your mother had handed it to you and now, you had subconsciously decided that you wanted to choose your own path forward despite what the decision letter may or may not say.
Feeling strangely empowered and confident, you stood to your feet and ventured into the bedroom where you slipped the envelope into one of the drawers Keishin was letting you keep your clothes in and tucked it underneath one of your sweaters. Maybe one day you would open the damn thing when whatever was inside wasn't weighing so heavily on your mind and future, but today was not that day.
Just then, you heard the front door open and knew Keishin had arrived home. Closing the drawer, you plastered a smile across your face and exited the bedroom to greet your boyfriend.
"Welcome home, Dear," you giggled, trying your best to fake the part of a doting housewife. "How was the volleyball game?"
Keishin chuckled softly as you took the takeout bags from him. "It was a close game, but they pulled it together in the last set and won."
"Oh, good!" You placed the bags onto the table before retrieving some plates and chopsticks from the kitchen.
"How was your day?" he asked as he pressed a chaste kiss to your cheek.
You sighed as you thought back on your day. "It was okay," you answered, not really wanting to go into much more detail than that. You doubted Keishin wanted to hear about your minuscule problems with rude customers after the long day he had clearly had.
Keishin, however, picked up on your uncertainty right away. "Doesn't sound okay," he commented. "Want to talk about it?"
You shrugged. "Just some shitty customers. Seems I had forgotten how poorly low-level workers are treated sometimes . . . just threw me a little," you said. "I'll be fine. Just glad the day is over now."
"You and me both." He flashed a smile as he turned to head for the bedroom. "I'm just going to change quickly and then we'll eat."
"Sounds good." You started dishing out some of the food. "I was also thinking we could watch a movie tonight as well. I could use something to clear my mind."
"Sitting on the couch with a beer is an ideal evening in my book," you heard him respond faintly from the bedroom. "There's a new action movie that came out. I think it's about-"
You waited for Keishin to finish his sentence, but when he didn't, you cocked your head and looked toward the bedroom doorway. Before you had the chance to call out to him, he appeared in the doorway shirtless, eyebrows furrowed and the envelope from the university in his hand.
"W-why do you have that?" you asked, the look on his face upon discovering the letter making your heart drop. "That was in my drawer . . . why were you going through my things?"
"I was looking for my sweater, the one you always steal," he answered. "Y/N . . . what is this?"
Rounding the table and approaching Keishin, you snatched the envelope out of his hand. "That is one of the many reasons why my day today was so shitty."
As you turned to head for the kitchen to toss the envelope in the garbage and rid your life of it, Keishin followed you. "You didn't get in?" he inquired.
You shrugged. "I have no idea. I didn't open it."
As you moved to toss the letter into the trash, Keishin grabbed your wrist and stopped you. "Why are you throwing it out if you didn't open it yet?"
"Because I don't care what it says. I've decided that I'm going to stay here with you and work at the store. This is the life I want . . . the life I get to choose for myself."
"You should still open it," he reasoned. "You might change how you feel about it when you see the result."
"I don't want to change how I feel about it." You shook your head as you gently pried your wrist out of his grip. "No need to make things more difficult than they need to be. I've had enough difficulty for one lifetime, thank you very much. This decision is easy, and best of all, it makes me happy."
Gesturing to the envelope, Keishin sighed. "But this is what you wanted. When you told me about your dream to play soccer at the University of Tokyo, your face lit up. Why are giving up on your dream before you've even given yourself a chance to experience it?"
"Dreams can change, Keishin," you told him before sighing and deciding to humour him for a moment. "Okay, let's say I open this letter and somehow did get in. What then? I couldn't pay for that school in my wildest dreams; not without my parents' help. Sometimes dreams are just childish and unrealistic. So I found a new dream, one with us living here together."
"You could apply for student loans. Tons of people do." He folded his arms across his chest. "I don't think this is about the money or your parents. I think this is about us. You've gotten comfortable here."
Throwing your hands up into the air in exasperation, you huffed. "And so what if I have? Is that really so bad?"
"I just don't want you to throw away an opportunity like this over me."
"Over you?" you cocked a brow. "Because you're, what, trash? Not worth it? A lowlife? A burnout?"
Keishin bit at his bottom lip. "You know what's not what I meant."
Inhaling deeply, you glared down at the god-forsaken envelope in your hand and began to tear at the top. "Let's not fight about something that probably isn't even going to happen." You pulled the letter out and unfolded it, your eyes scanning the text quickly. "The University of Tokyo is notoriously difficult to get into and I-"
Keishin quirked a brow when you stopped mid-sentence. "What does it say?"
A broken laugh was the only thing you could manage as you lowered the letter and shook your head. "Un-fucking-believable." You handed the paper over to Keishin, the edge crumpled from where your grip had tightened when you read the decision.
Keishin looked at the page for all of two seconds before he found the bolded 'Congratulations' and a huge grin spread across his face. "You got in!" He was way more excited than you were about this. "This is good news. You can play soccer at the University of Tokyo. Come on, you can't tell me this doesn't make you at least a little happy."
"I wish it did," you answered honestly. "I wish it were that easy."
"It is! It can be." Keishin set the letter down on the counter and took your hands in his. "Student loans, part-time jobs, it's all possible. Sure, it might be a little tricky to work out, but it's totally possible."
When you didn't respond, Keishin hooked his fingers under your chin and tilted your head up to look at him. "Accept the spot at the university. Follow your dream," he told you.
". . . but I'll have to leave you." You felt the words catch in your throat and tried your hardest not to start crying. "You make me happy—you're the first thing that's made me genuinely happy in a long time—and I don't want to leave that for a chance at something that might not even work out."
"But what if it does work out? You don't know that it won't," he said softly. "Don't end up like me, looking back at your past and wondering what might have been if you had just chosen a different path. I know this might seem good enough for now, but how will you feel after ten or twenty years of working the same dead-end job for the same shit pay all while getting treated like shit by people who look down on you? Look at how one day of catering to pretentious assholes made you feel. Do you really want to live the rest of your life like that?"
"But what about you?" you asked, your voice shaky.
Keishin dropped his head, a few stray strands of hair falling into his face. Unlike that morning, when he had been asleep with loose hairs in his face, he looked annoyed and frustrated now. The bags under his eyes and tension lines on his forehead were a stark contrast to the soft, peaceful face you had woken up to that morning.
"Don't throw this away over me," he repeated. "Don't throw your future away over a 26-year-old burnout."
Lip quivering, you sucked in a deep breath. "I thought you were different . . . but you're just like everyone else."
Keishin eyed you. "What's that supposed to mean?"
"You said I should make my own decisions and live my life how I wanted but it was all a facade." You slipped your hand out of his and took a step back. "In the end, you're just like everyone else . . . you think you have a right to plan my future for me without giving me a say in the matter. You want to tell me how to live my life just like my parents."
"How could you say that?" Keishin almost snapped but managed to collect his anger before he did. "All I want is what's best for you."
You scoffed as you wiped a tear from your cheek. "If I had a penny for every time I've heard that I'd have enough money to pay for the University of Tokyo and then you'd get your damn wish . . . I'd be gone."
"When did I ever say I wanted you gone? Why are you so adamant that going to Tokyo means we can't be together?"
"Why are you so against just letting me make my own decision about this?! Why do I have to go to play soccer at that fucking university and leave you? I don't want to leave you!"
"Why not? Why are you so damn hung up on someone like me?!"
"Because I love you!" The two of you froze in place the second those words left your mouth. Chest heaving from the shouting and high emotions, you snapped your mouth shut before you said anything else in the heat of the moment.
Eyes wide, Keishin stared at you like a deer in headlights. "You what?"
You debated whether or not you should repeat what you had said, but by then, the damage had been done. "I love you," you breathed. "And I know you told me not to fall in love with you . . . but I did. I fell hard and fast and now I'm stuck in you and I cannot possibly leave you so please stop asking me to."
You waited for what felt like an eternity for Keishin to say something, say anything. He opened his mouth a few times like he was about to, but nothing ever came out.
"Keishin . . ." You took a cautious step forward. "Please say something."
Keishin swallowed hard before looking you directly in the eyes. "If I said I didn't love you back, would you go?"
You felt your heart crack and the sensation of being punched in the gut spread throughout your entire body. "Is that what you're saying? You don't love me?"
"If I didn't, would you leave?"
You inhaled sharply. "If you look me in the eyes right now and tell me that you don't feel the same way that I do; that everything over the past few months has meant nothing to you, there would be no possible way I could stay in Miyagi," you answered truthfully. "If you tell me that you don't love me and that you never have, I would have no reason to stay in this prefecture."
Keishin's lips parted once more. "Y/N . . . I-" His brown eyes locked onto yours and you could feel what he was about to say even though he never did. "I . . . I can't do this right now."
With that, he brushed past you, grabbed a sweater from the bedroom and threw it on before storming out of the apartment, leaving you and the now cold takeout food alone.
Tears in your eyes and a lump in your throat, you turned to look over your shoulder at the decision letter sitting on the counter, practically taunting you.
You should have thrown the thing out the second your mom dropped it off. Or better yet, maybe you should have never made that deal with Keishin and applied for the university in the first place.
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