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autismserenity · 3 months

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know someone who enjoys horror stories? share this one! it's true!

hahahahahahahahahaha aarrggghhhhhhhhhh 3,000,000 deaths due to COVID-19 last year. Globally. Three million. Case rates higher than 90% of the rest of the pandemic. The reason people are still worried about COVID is because it has a way of quietly fucking up your body. And the risk is cumulative.

I'm going to say that again: the risk is cumulative.

It's not just that a lot of people get bad long-term effects from it. One in seven or so? Enough that it's kind of the Russian Roulette of diseases. It's also that the more times you get it, the higher that risk becomes. Like if each time you survived Russian Roulette, the empty chamber was removed from the gun entirely. The worst part is that, psychologically, we have the absolute opposite reaction. If we survive something with no ill effects, we assume it's pretty safe. It is really, really hard to override that sense of, "Ok, well, I got it and now I probably have a lot of immunity and also it wasn't that bad." It is not a respiratory disease. Airborne, yes. Respiratory disease, no: not a cold, not a flu, not RSV.

Like measles (or maybe chickenpox?), it starts with respiratory symptoms. And then it moves to other parts of your body. It seems to target the lungs, the digestive system, the heart, and the brain the most.

It also hits the immune system really hard - a lot of people are suddenly more susceptible to completely unrelated viruses. People get brain fog, migraines, forget things they used to know.

(I really, really hate that it can cross the blood-brain barrier. NOTHING SHOULD EVER CROSS THE BLOOD-BRAIN BARRIER IT IS THERE FOR A REASON.) Anecdotal examples of this shit are horrifying. I've seen people talk about coworkers who've had COVID five or more times, and now their work... just often doesn't make sense? They send emails that say things like, "Sorry, I didn't mean Los Angeles, I meant Los Angeles."

Or they insist they've never heard of some project that they were actually in charge of a year or two before.

Or their work is just kind of falling apart, and they don't seem to be aware of it.

People talk about how they don't want to get the person in trouble, so their team just works around it. Or they describe neighbors and relatives who had COVID repeatedly, were nearly hospitalized, talked about how incredibly sick they felt at the time... and now swear they've only had it once and it wasn't bad, they barely even noticed it.

(As someone who lived with severe dissociation for most of my life, this is a genuinely terrifying idea to me. I've already spent my whole life being like, "but what if I told them that already? but what if I did do that? what if that did happen to me and I just don't remember?") One of its known effects in the brain is to increase impulsivity and risk-taking, which is real fucking convenient honestly. What a fantastic fucking mutation. So happy for it on that one. Yes, please make it seem less important to wear a mask and get vaccinated. I'm not screaming internally at all now.

I saw a tweet from someone last year whose family hadn't had COVID yet, who were still masking in public, including school.

She said that her son was no kind of an athlete. Solidly bottom middle of the pack in gym.

And suddenly, this year, he was absolutely blowing past all the other kids who had to run the mile. He wasn't running any faster. His times weren't fantastic or anything. It's just that the rest of the kids were worse than him now. For some reason. I think about that a lot. (Like my incredibly active six-year-old getting a cold, and suddenly developing post-viral asthma that looked like pneumonia.

He went back to school the day before yesterday, after being home for a month and using preventative inhalers for almost week.

He told me that it was GREAT - except that he couldn't run as much at recess, because he immediately got really tired. Like how I went outside with him to do some yard work and felt like my body couldn't figure out how to increase breathing and heart rate.

I wasn't physically out of breath, but I felt like I was out of breath. That COVID feeling people describe, of "I'm not getting enough air." Except that I didn't have that problem when I had COVID.) Some people don't observe any long (or medium) term side effects after they have it.

But researchers have found viral reservoirs of COVID-19 in everyone they've studied who had it.

It just seems to hang out, dormant, for... well, longer than we've had an opportunity to observe it, so far.

(I definitely watched that literal horror movie. I think that's an entire genre. The alien dormant under ice in the Arctic.)

(oh hey I don't like that either!!!!!!!!!) All of which is to explain why we should still care about avoiding it, and how it manages to still cause excess deaths. Measuring excess deaths has been a standard tool in public health for a long time.

We know how many people usually die from all different causes, every year. So we can tell if, for example, deaths from heart disease have gone way up in the past three years, and look for reasons. Those are excess deaths: deaths that, four years ago, would not have happened. During the pandemic, excess death rates have been a really important tool. For all sorts of reasons. Like, sometimes people die from COVID without ever getting tested, and the official cause is listed as something else because nobody knows they had COVID. But also, people are dying from cardiovascular illness much younger now.

People are having strokes and heart attacks younger, and more often, than they did before the pandemic started. COVID causes a lot of problems. And some of those problems kill people. And some of them make it easier for other things to kill us. Lung damage from COVID leading to lungs collapsing, or to pneumonia, or to a pulmonary embolism, for example. The Economist built a machine-learning model with a 95% confidence interval that gauges excess death statistics around the world, to tell them what the true toll of the ongoing COVID pandemic has been so far.

Total excess deaths globally in 2023: Three million.

3,000,000.

Official COVID-19 deaths globally so far: Seven million. 7,000,000. Total excess deaths during COVID so far: Thirty-five point two million. 35,200,000.

Five times as many.

That's bad. I don't like that at all. I'm glad last year was less than a tenth of that. I'm not particularly confident about that continuing, though, because last year we started a period of really high COVID transmission. Case rates higher than 90% of the rest of the pandemic. Here's their data, and charts you can play with, and links to detailed information on how they did all of this:

Here's a non-paywalled link to it:

https://archive.vn/2024.01.26-012536/https://www.economist.com/graphic-detail/coronavirus-excess-deaths-estimates

Oh: here's a link to where you can buy comfy, effective N95 masks in all sizes:

Those ones are about a buck each after shipping - about $30 for a box of 30. They also have sample packs for a dollar, so you can try a couple of different sizes and styles.

You can wear an N95 mask for about 40 total hours before the effectiveness really drops, so that's like a dollar for a week of wear.

They're also family-owned and have cat-shaped masks and I really love them. These ones are cuter and in a much wider range of colors, prints, and styles, but they're also more expensive; they range from $1.80 to $3 for a mask. ($18-$30 for a box of ten.)

#covid isn't over #covid 19 #disability rights #disability advocacy #wear a mask #covid conscious #covid cautious #mask up #wall of words #public health #health care

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lazyjellyfish300 · 4 months

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Mom and Dad are fighting on Christmas 🎄⛄🖤

Miguel O'Hara x wife reader

TW: MINORS DNI, angst, relationship and marriage troubles, fighting, insecurity, jealousy, postpartum, talk of divorce, mild smut at the end (p in v, idk to me it's mild, I've seen worse) word count 3.3k

Credit to the gif owner keezinemugstudent! 🙏🏽

Synopsis: your marriage to Miguel is on the brink of collapse. He wakes up and tries to fix it on Christmas. Jerry Maguire inspired. 😁

Valentine's Day spinoff sequel

I tried to write something angsty. Hope everyone had/is having a good holiday season! ⛄

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Miguel's in the doghouse and he knows it. You requested a separation after you reached your limit. The kids were sick in the weeks following Thanksgiving and before Christmas and he spent the whole time working late and coming home at suspicious hours in the morning, leaving you drowning. You and the kids were piled in yours and Miguel's bed when you'd hear him come home, the front door closing and his familiar footfalls dredging down the hall, pausing only at the fridge before passing out on the couch. Oh you hated him right now. The resentment had creeped in and poisoned the marriage inside and out when he became exceedingly obsessed with work.

Protecting the stability of the multiverse was a huge undertaking, but, like all things in his life, Miguel took it to the next level. But when it came to his personal life, he was grievously lacking. The passion where you two would do it twice a day and couldn't keep your hands out of each other's pants? Ancient history. The small pecks you'd trade in the mornings were a thing of the past. Gone were the days you two would text all day and go out for dates. You didn't so much as get an "on my way home" text, instead letting the sound of his car pulling in the driveway be your confirmation of his return. You two were more roomates at this point than husband and wife.

Traditionally, on Christmas Eve after the kids went to bed, you two would take that time for each other, eating the cookies for Santa that were conveniently your favorite kind, placing the presents you two carefully shopped for and wrapped (well, mostly you wrapped), under the tree. A hysterical giggle would escape your lips at the milk mustache on Miguel's face. Then you'd two get busy on the floor in front of the fireplace, fighting back laughter as you tried to keep your moans down, every year struggling a little bit more than before because your knees weren't what they used to be before taking it to your bedroom for one more round before the chaos of Christmas morning began.

He was perfect in the beginning. The romance between you two used to be at an all time high. He was a nerd in the same friend circle when you knew him in high school, wickedly smart, the guy who won the Robotics and Math Olympiad comps and got visits from Ivy League college STEM departments, eager to scoop up his talent. Sure, he was cute, but when he went to college is when you heard he had a major glow up and became kind of cocky. You heard about how he became Spider-Man and was pretty much the greatest thing since sliced bread in the eyes of the people, saving lives and fighting villains and all. You knew how the opposite gender seemed to malfunction and forget how to act around him, so you stifled away your tiny crush you had on him for years in the smallest crevice in your brain in a forgotten folder, never thinking it'd see the light of day.

When you saw him at your high school reunion, you decided to be brave and remark on how they're playing Nickelback, which he shrugged and said he actually enjoyed them, to which you sheepishly admitted that you really enjoyed them deep down too, you just couldn't resist making yourself the person to talk shit, since there's always gotta be one hater when Nickelback comes on. A canon event, if you will. This earned a tiny side smile from him, a chink in his stoic armor. After 8 beers, some flirty jests, and a little backseat rendezvous in his car, that became the last night that you two spent apart.

You were a single mom and he was a single dad. He had Gabi who was now 10 and you had Marcus who was now 6. Then you two had little Anthony together who was now 2. At first he was at all the doctors appointments, all the parent teacher conferences, he knew what the kids were doing in school. He did bed times every night, reading in a silly voice with Gabi and Marcus both balancing on his lap while you rocked baby Anthony, smiling when you heard the kids giggling from the other room. You'd walk in after baby Anthony fell asleep in his crib, your heart melting as you saw this handsome giant of a man usually known to be cold and serious to everyone else, turn into the doting husband and loving father you knew him to be. Now, years of the monotony of every day life, pressures of raising a family, and the dying egalitarian attitude you two had as partners snowballed into your own version of Gottman's four horses, leading your marriage to Miguel into apocalypse.

At first, he welcomed the separation as you two battled in the kitchen.

"You wanna separation, fine, I'll do you one better. I'll fucking leave! Felicia's better company anyway," he smirked.

There wasn't real truth behind his statement, but he knew it would hurt you when you heard it. He'd be lying if he said Felicia wasn't an attractive woman, but, she simply wasn't you. He had learned his lesson on cheating years ago when he fumbled his relationship with Gabi's mother.

Ouch. But his words could be daggers when he wanted them to be, and he knew just how to twist them into you. Of course it was Felicia. Felicia, the gorgeous Black Cat recruit from work. Her silvery hair that halted midway down her back and startling blue eyes that could drown any man in them. She didn't have kids either, a life with her promised excitement, passion, and freedom. She was witty and funny and had a way of making anyone in her vicinity listen when she spoke. And to add insult to injury, she had a killer body.

After giving birth, you became so busy, and with reassurance from Miguel that you were still beautiful to him, you let your desire to get your body to "snap back" sit on the back burner. Signs of motherhood and postpartum marked you with purple stripes running vertical on your soft belly and a new plushness to your thighs. Basically, Felicia was a complete 180 from the woman you were, which made the sting of his words that much more unbearable. He took your vulnerabilities and threw them in your face.

"Oh so you admit it, finally! I know there was something going on between you two. Makes sense. She's a gorgeous woman, right? She can fucking have you then. What, are you in love with her?"

Miguel rolled his eyes, annoyed with the superficialness of your statement and your obsession with looks, despite him reassuring you many times that he wouldn't look at other women.

"I'm not in love with her, but she doesn't nag me all the fucking time like you do. I bust my ass every day for this family so you don't have to work. I don't know who this new woman is that I'm looking at right now and what she's done with my wife, but it's not the woman I fell in love with. It would be nice if you could show me a little appreciation once in a while."

You felt your blood pressure rise.

"Appreciation.... APPRECIATION, are you fucking kidding me?! I was up all goddamn night with Gabi and Marcus. I run this fucking household all by myself. I quit my fucking career to stay home and raise your kids. Do you not understand how lonely that is?"

"I'M LONELY!!! " he yells, triggered, the feelings bottled up, fizzed over and hurtled at you like a cork on a champagne bottle. "How do you think I feel? I got women at work practically throwing themselves at me but I don't do anything about it because I'm a good husband. Meanwhile, my own wife doesn't wanna fuck me. I'm a prisoner in my own fucking house."

Your eyes almost slipped from their sockets from rolling them so hard. He seemed to want a cookie and a gold star for just being loyal, the bare minimum.

"Oh, so you wanna fuck them? Go ahead! Maybe I'd fuck you if you actually gave a shit about me and not like I'm some damn fleshlight you use to get off!" You hurl back.

He left and checked into a hotel down the street.

A few weeks had passed and it was now Christmas. You were getting used to being separated but your heart still ached in your chest. You couldn't go on doing life, when the one person you did life with was nowhere to be found. You couldn't listen to your favorite songs, eat your favorite foods, or even look at your own children without being reminded of him. Gabi was his spitting image. Same with Anthony. Even Marcus, who was his stepson, started adopting Miguel's mannerisms. The way he'd scratch his head while he did his math homework, deep in concentration.

It was Christmas evening at your mom's. You joined the other women in your family, your non-politically correct Aunt, your soft spoken sister-in-law, your mother with a don't-try-me attitude, and your younger sister with a sass to rival your mother's. You were all complaining about the men in your lives, your aunt rattling off about her 3 ex husbands but, 'hey she collects alimony from two of them so she can't complain!', your younger sister complaining about the frat guys at college who just wanna get in your pants, your sister in law who's silent the whole time (your brother treats her like a queen), and your mom about your asshole dad with an erratic mother who was incapable of cutting the apron strings and made her life a living hell. The kids are laughing and playing in the basement, eagerly trying out their new Nintendo Switch Santa left under the tree.

"I'm here for my wife."

Your feminine council meeting is interrupted by an unwelcome masculine figure. It's your estranged husband, Miguel, the coffee-colored strands of hair that hung over his forehead starting to wet from the snowflakes that melted under the warmth of the room as he stepped inside, a look of regret and longing embedded in his eyes that you hadn't seen since your earliest days of knowing him.

His strong hands dangled at his sides in fists, his chest heaving up and down. His navy blazer bearing dark water stains from the melted snow. He had a revelation at work. He and Peter B. stopped an anomaly that was terrorizing the streets of Queens in Peter's universe. The battle was close, almost a little too close to where he lived, putting MJ and Mayday in direct danger. After the job was done, the moving and emotional reunion between Peter B., MJ, and Mayday was his epiphany.

As the little family reveled in their joy and relief of evading the ultimate disaster, the only thing there for Miguel at the point of his return was the inanimate, empty, thin walls of his apartment and the thoughts of you, his severed family, that inevitably haunted him. He needed you back. He needed to apologize and fix it now.

He ran from your house to your mom's in the snow and all. It was the first Christmas Eve he spent not in between your thighs and buried deep inside you. It was the first Christmas morning he didn't wake up to Gabi's blueberry pancakes and Marcus tackling him while Anthony screamed in delight. It was going to be the first Christmas night without his family by his side, an uncomfortably obvious empty seat at the table he rightfully belonged. Next to you.

Sometimes you don't know the value of something until it's gone. Sometimes life gets in the way and you forget to appreciate the person in front of you. Why did I treat my wife like garbage when all she ever wanted was for me to ask how her day was? Why were we on our way to winding up like both sets of our parents? Doomed to repeat the cycle of divorce and hurt. Doomed to lose your faith in love and marriage like all the maternal figures in your family before you did.

Now here he was, in the living room while your mom, sister, and aunt moved towards each other, eyes squinting, three pitbulls willing to jump in on your behalf while your sister in law just stayed frozen in place. He was in enemy territory and he needed to choose his words carefully.

"Not here Miguel..."

"YES here. Right now." He says in a firm voice. "You're not getting rid of me, woman."

You scoff, almost amused by his sudden urgency and painting you like you're the one who wanted this family to be broken apart.

"The kids are downstairs..." you start to say, hoping that the mention that innocent ears could be prying into the adult conversation would help him simmer down.

"I'll see them in a minute." He says flatly.

"I miss my wife...."-he chokes on the last word, wife.

"And I want her to come home." He knew at any time his words would give way to the reservoir of tears built up behind it.

You stood there, incredulous.

"I don't want to come home to an empty apartment. I don't want my own bed. I'm ashamed it took me losing you and the kids for me to wake up. And, I'm so so sorry. I'll do whatever I can to be better. To be a better man for you and the husband that you needed. We both got caught up in real life and focused on the kids so much that we lost each other. Well, this is me trying to find my way back."

Your lips parted slightly as your breathing became heavier. This was all you ever wanted to hear him say. Stop neglecting the love between you two that laid dormant, a plant starved of sunshine. For him to finally shake off the stubborn shackles that was his ego and express himself to you. Let him allow you back into his heart, no longer as a guest, but a permanent resident.

"You're... you're everything to me. And I'm not leaving here tonight until you let me know if you'd allow me the opportunity to get hurt by you again," a tear rolled down his cheek, his scarlet eyes yearning, his hands pining for the feel of you. As though the madness of not having you alone could stop his heart from beating, stop his world from turning, rearrange life as he knew it into a hollow existence not worth seeing.

Your own reservoir could not be held back any longer and started to roll down your cheeks. He managed to peel back the walls you built with his apology, revealing the woman underneath who just missed her husband.

He steps closer to you now, eager to bridge the rest of the space between your bodies.

"You still love me?" he asked softly.

Your chest heaves, shoulders raising then falling sharply, feeling yourself crack with exasperation under his burning gaze as you softly answer,

"Never stopped."

He grabs you and pulls you into him, his embrace is tight as though you'd disappear if he dared to break it. He tangles a hand in your hair and presses his cheek into your head, his eyes closed, drinking in the scent he'd been away from for weeks. You bury your face in his chest, trying to make yourself small and allowing his frame to swallow you whole, not minding his wet shirt and blazer that still have a slight chill on them from the storm outside, allowing your body heat to seep into his. You both began to rock back and forth a little bit, still locked inside your hug. It was as though the passing of time had evaporated and it was only you two in the room, nevermind your family witnessed the whole thing.

After several long moments, you pull apart and he offers you one of his dazzling smiles, one you hadn't seen in months. The kids have made their way upstairs and shriek with excitement when they see their dad and Miguel bends down to scoop them up. You smile and stand beside your mom who scoops you into a side hug. With her blessing, Miguel stays and celebrates the rest of Christmas with you and your family.

Gabi, Marcus, and Anthony are now all tucked in. The sugar from the chocolate they consumed all day had worn off, making them crash hard in their beds. You and Miguel are cuddled up on the couch watching the fireplace, taking some needed time as a couple. You stroke his strong arms that are wrapped around you with your fingertips, watching the way the flames leap and spark in the air when they crackle against the charred wood. You look up at him and feel a wave of desire wash over you that you had pent up for months as you study his chiseled features and the way the fire's glow highlights his skin.

"Should we end this Christmas with a bang?" You ask, pun fully intended.

Miguel looks at you tiredly, trying to act like that wasn't a witty remark but he lets out a chuckle. "I'd love to," he whispers.

He takes both your cheeks in his large hands and brings his lips to you immediately. They're soft and full. You feel yourself melting into him every time he sandwiches yours in between them. He reclines you backwards, slowly, until he's on top of you. He lets the weight of his body and hips come down on you little by little, making you arch your back, so your body can better receive him.

Once he lets you taste his tongue, you open your mouth wider, permitting him to deepen the kiss, tossing kindle onto the growing flame between you two, and it's not the one in your fireplace. You take your turn to dial up the heat, seizing his bottom lip in a gentle nip from your teeth, earning a low groan from Miguel and a tightened grip on your hair.

As you continue your steamy makeout session, he begins to hump gently against your clothed body, a nonverbal plea for the wet friction only the inside of you can provide.

After your frantic hands strip each other of your clothes, you've transitioned so you're straddling him in the lotus position, goosebumps popping up all over your skin as your bare body meets his, a high pitched gasp escaping you as you sink down onto him, his mouth falling open and his eyes shutting closed as he breathes in your ear,

"God, I missed you, baby."

You whine into his neck as you coil your fists in his hair. His hands fly to the soft flesh of your sides, using them to move you up and down, his haggard breaths making you weaker and weaker by the minute. You hum,

"I missed you even more."

The next move of his hips is harder than you anticipated, causing your brain to go fuzzy with pleasure.

"How much?" he exhales in a sultry tone.

"I couldn't stop thinking about you all week,"your tone turning into pleading as you feel yourself approaching your limit.

Miguel can't help but feel himself lose his mind a little bit at your words and at your reaction, sensing you won't be able to hold on much longer.

He lays you down, while still keeping himself inside. He slows down to a more sensual pace, breathing in the sight of your wild hair clinging to the couch cushions, evidence of him hitting you in all the right spots every time the inner corners of your eyebrows squinch upwards and your lips fall open.

His loving eyes burn with worship of your body and how well you're doing as he runs a thumb along your chin then pulls down your bottom lip, leans in and mumbles quietly into your mouth,

"Merry Christmas, Mrs. O'Hara."

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🖤

#miguel o'hara #spotify #miguel x reader #miguel atsv #miguel o'hara x reader #miguel ohara #across the spiderverse #fanfic #miguel o'hara angst #Spotify #miguel o'hara smut

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poptartmochi · 1 year

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why is it every time I have a mental breakdown, I also have a breakthrough with miss gioia. she and the illness are linked your honor 🆘

#i took a shower and i feel better now.. i think i concluded why i felt so bad.. since ren faire and my little managerial stint are over‚#i have finally concluded the ''I Can't Work on the Garage'' era which started in like.. May?#so i think my brain was mourning the time that went by in a very mysterious way.. it's crazy to think about how much time has passed #in january we'll have been in this house for a year and we've barely moved in 🕴️i have yet to unpack my room..#besides that i think i was emotionally Up In Arms because man I don't want to work on the fucking garage 😭#but it must be done... storage is $200 a month and the things that remain are way too heavy to justify moving into a smaller container #i just have to finish it over the next few months.. pleakse GOD let it be swift!!!!#after that i will have my multiple jobs era and maybe my mom will get a divorce and i can start saving up for college again #I gave up on it bc my dad is so financially irresponsible that my money was basically going towards the mortgage or storage or his credit #bills 😔 even now I'm kind of anxious because I don't know if we'll have enough to pay for this month's stuff #i feel like I've been living groundhog day with this situation.. every time i think things might be okay my mom tells me what my dad has #spent and the anxiety starts all over again. and that's just me!!! i think i would have died if i was her :(#but this chapter must end somehow. im going to see that through if it kills me #anyways mini therapy moment aside it is time for me to ramble about gioia hehehe 🤪🤪🥴#sriracha.txt

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russellsppttemplates · 1 month

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My person (Charles Leclerc)

Your brother's best friend is sure you were made for eachother

Note: english is not my first language. Most times I read a brother's best friend trope, it's usually the reader going after the boy, so I felt like doing things a little bit different (also, my brain got a bit jumbled because I was wondering about the perspective, and in the end I went with reader being Joris' twin). Also, I always feel a little bit of impostor's syndrome whenever I post these tropes for which I've read many great pieces about it, and I never know if my ones are good enough to be posted but we're going with it

Thank you so much to everyone who likes and reblogs, your feedback is appreciated 🤍 and I'm taking requests so if you have any ideas or concepts you want to share, feel free to do so as I'll try to get to them the best I can!

my masterlist

Tag list: @myloverjk-blog

Most people thought having a twin brother was bitter sweet because while you had to share everything since the womb, you had a brother so there came a time where you wanted to have different toys, different rooms and different styles.

Different friends, however, was never a question. Even with different interests, you and Joris often came as a duo, so both of your friend groups were pretty close.

"We're going to Charles' apartment to watch the football game, are you joining us?", Joris asked, throwing himself on your sofa and partially occupying your personal space, "Marta is going to be over and I think she's taking Chiara with her, too".

You don't remember a time where Charles wasn't in your life. Your brother knew him since they were in kindergarten and so there wasn't a memory where he wasn't involved. Which brought you to the last time you were with him, just a week before.

Charles spent the afternoon with Joris at your brother's apartment, wanting to relax and game for the rest of the day.

"It's Y/N", Charles said as he gave Joris his ringing phone, your caller ID prompting him to pick the calk up right away, "can you come and get me, please?", he heard you faintly as Joris got up straight away, listening to whatever you were telling as he put on his trainers and jacket.

"Y/N needs me to pick her up from the café - turns out her date thought she wouldn't mind going home on her own", Joris rolled his eyes, "it will be quick, you're good on your own here?", he checked with Charles, "sure", the driver assured, unpausing the game and carrying on.

Another date and another disappointment for you, Charles thought. While you weren't as close as his brother was to him, he still knew about your life as much as your other friends, and lately you had been looking for someone, your person, you claimed. Luck had yet to join your search as every date you went on seemed to go between bad and awful.

If he had the courage to come clean about his feelings, maybe things would be different. For a while, yes, you were Joris' twin sister and that was it. You were a cool girl and he didn't mind spending time with you or having your hang out with their group, but things changed when you went to university.

Maybe it was your glow up, although you never needed one to catch his eye in the first place, but year after year, you grew to exude confidence, your natural beauty enhanced as you turned into a charming, caring and kind young woman.

Since he didn't want to ruin the bond you had, he watched it all happen from the sidelines. How happy you sounded whenever you had a date later in the week, whenever a cute guy came up to you in the club and how you squealed "I think this one might be the one!" as you excused yourself and declined dinner invitations from the group for a date.

He heard the door open and then close, footsteps approaching the living room as he paused the game just in time for you to sit on the sofa, "what's up, Leclerc?", you nudged his shoulder.

"I'm good, how are you?", he quesioned, "I guess that one isn't the love of your life either?", he semi joked.

"He was certifiable, at the very least", you began as the boys chuckled, "Hey! I'm qualified to make such appreciation! He kept talking about himself and he was borderline sexist, but then he said I would be fine going home on my own? I don't know, it was a mess and I can't believe I even experienced that - I'm going to pretend it was a fever dream", you shrugged your shoulders, "I was expecting to spend the afternoon with him - thank Goodness I didn't, - and the construction work at my place is still going so I don't have anywhere to go, I'm sorry if I'm crashing your afternoon", you gulped.

"It's fine, it's nice having company other than us two playing and screaming at eachother", Charles smiled as Joris shrugged his shoulders, "you're already staying her until the building work is done", you brother offered.

"I wasn't asking you, silly; you're my twin, dealing with me it's something that comes with the job", you winked.

When it came to dinner time, the three of you decided to have take out, your brother calling the restaurant and scheduling a time for him to pick it up, "I'm going to shower", you said as you got up from the sofa, heading to the guest room you were staying in.

By the time you got out, your heard Joris shout that he was leaving while you put on some comfy clothes for the evening in. When you went to the balcony so your towels could air dry for a bit, you sat in the padded chair, looking out to the sunset.

He would come, you thought. It wasn't particularly a manifestation or a "throw it at the universe" kind of thing, but rather something to reassure yourself. You were worthy of the standards you set for yourself and there was someone out there for you, and he would come.

"Hey", Charles stepped into the balcony, coming to sit in the chair next to yours, "a cent for your thoughts?", he smiled softly, the warm yellow and orange light hitting his eyes in a glowy hue.

"Do you believe that the right person for you is out there?", you shot softly.

"I know she is", Charles gulped, "Oh, confident!", you giggled softly, "but it's nice, better than being sulky like me".

"I'm not sure how much better it is. I know she is out there, but it's a little more complicated than just going up to her and tell her that", he played with hia thumbs.

"So you're chickening out?", you quirked your eyebrow, partly teasing him but genuinely curious about it. You didn't have enough fingers to count how many girls tried to approach you and befriend you with the only goal of getting into a friendship circle that would lead them to Charles, and he could probably chat up anyone he wanted, so it was hard for you to understand how he didn't have the love of his life with him yet.

"It's not chickening out if you think it might cause some issues with your friends, I think. I'm being prudent, that's all", Charles tried, wanting to take the opportunity to try and see where you stood. Girls were usually sharper than guys, so you said many times, maybe you'd take the hint.

"If I knew who the love of my life was, I would go to him and never look back. I know it sounds silly, but I wouldn't want to be away from him a second longer, it would be quite shitty if he was in a relationship", you mused, "but if we were really meant to be together - if it was a both ways kind of thing - he would know it, right? Goodness, sound a bit like a romantic sop, don't I?", you chuckled, "but I would fight for him, for us".

Charles felt inspired before he felt a little angry. Here you here saying you would fight until you found your person when he was right there. If it really worked as a both ways thing, you'd have to know and feel the person you kept looking for was him. He broke into a full belly laugh as he stated at you. No make-up, hair sitting in its natural wave and comfy clothes, you never looked so beautiful to him.

"Would you let me fight for us, too?", he mused quietly but loud enough for you to hear, "would you want me to do that?".

Giggling at him, you could only shake your head at his words, "I know this sound silly - Joris teases me enough about it enough", you groaned as your hands covered your face.

"I'm not joking or teasing", Charles clarified, turning to face you on the chair, "All I want is for you to look at me the way you look at them", Charles stated, "whenever you talk about your dates before you go on them, you're so hopeful that that guy will be the one, you look forward to it like it will be that time, and you never looked at me that way when I constantly make efforts to hung the stars and the moon for you and stand there hoping they get to you".

His confession took you off guard. Charles just admitted he liked you, in a way with words that was more elaborate than what any of your dates had ever told you combined.

"I thought you were being nice?! Was this some sort of plan?!", you quesioned immediately. He had been around you your whole life, you surely would've noticed it, wouldn't you?

Charles chuckled in a way you found a smidge belittling, "it wasn't a plan! Y/N, I have not been planning this or doing some strategy, it just happened out of nowhere!", Charles bit back, "like you said, the person for me is out there and she's you!".

The noise from the door pulled both of you out your discussion, your brother's singalong voice announcing he was back with the food.

Dusting your sweatpants, you stepped back inside the living room, shaking off the jitters you had as your brother scrunched up his face, "is everything okay?", he asked.

"Of course, I'm just hungry and you drove like a grandpa here", you bickered back as Charles joined you at the table, "I'll get the cutlery and plates from the kitchen", you mumbled.

The dinner was eaten quietly on your side, Charles and Joris making most of the conversation as you exchanged a few looks with the Formula One driver, your twin brother seemingly obvious as he carried on as usual, "I'm going to bed", you said after helping tidy, "are you sure? We were going to watch something on TV?", Joris asked you.

"I'm getting a headache, so I'll pass, good night boys", you gave them tight lipped smile.

In the bedroom, you changed into your pyjamas and finished your night-time routine and got under the sheets, Charles' words replaying as you looked at the ceiling.

"Y/N? Are you joining us or not? Do you have any plans?", Joris insisted, "you've been weird lately", he pointed out.

"I'll join you, yes, just need to get my hoodie and then I'll be good to go", you scrambled out as your heart beat faster inside your chest.

Joris offered to drive to Charles' apartment, getting there when Riccardo, Marta and little Chiara were alresdy inside with Charles.

"The rest of the group couldn't come, so it's just us", Riccardo said as he noticed your expression, "what a shame, more food for us!", you smirked, sitting next to Marta and playing with the little girl on her lap, "hello, my love, hello!", you cooed in the voice you only had for babies, "look at you so grown up! You get more beautiful everytime I see you", you smiled, tickling her chin softly as she giggled loudly.

"Who did the roast potatoes last time we got together?", Joris stepped back into the living room, "I did", you stated as you grabbed one of the toys on the coffee table, ready to sit down on the floor so you and Chiara could play together.

"Don't sit down!", your brother yelled, "sorry, but you can't sit down - Charles needs help with the potatoes and he doesn't know the recipe like you do", he reasoned as you got up, trying not to show how much you didn't want to be in the same room alone with Charles. Watching football while having dinner with your group of friends was one thing, spending one on one time with Charles after what he said to you the last time was another.

"Hey", you said as you stepped into the kitchen, "Joris said you needed help, what can I do?".

Charles smiled a little, maybe at the irony of your quesion, "I don't know what seasonings to use in these", he said as he showed you the vegetable with the ones he already cut up.

"Okay, do you keep the spices in the same place?", you asked as he nodded, encouraging you to use his kitchen like it was your own.

Opening the cabinets and grabbing what you needed, you started mixing the ingredients and cutting up the ones you needed to, "can you get me the olive oil, please? I can't reach it", you asked and Charles complied, "thank you".

"Is this how this is going to be? Interacting like we haven't known eachother since we were little and like I haven't poured my heart out to you?", Charles said, arms crossed as he rested against the kitchen counter.

"I wasn't counting on you saying all of that, I was so caught off guard that I haven't been able to think about anything else in my off time!", you offered, setting the knife down on the chopping board.

"It's not like people have speeches ready and give of warnings when they're about to confess their feelings for someone... I myself wasn't expecting to do it until the words came out of my mouth", Charles gestured as if he was vomiting, "what do you expect it to be like anyway? People have to warn you they have feelings for you and ask if you want to hear it?! Is that what you want?".

"I want to feel loved, appreciated and valued. I want to be with someone that reminds me that I'm beautiful, that I'm smart and I'm wonderful. I want to share my life with someone who has no trouble with me wanting to have both career goals and family goals, I want someone who supports me as much as a support him, who is willing to do silly things because I enjoy them and who loves me for me, flaws and all", you let out in one go, "That's what I want".

Charles eyebrows climbed on his forehead, "Are you insinuating I can't give you that? Is that why we haven't spoken since that evening at Joris' place?".

"I'm saying you're my brother's best friend, and no matter how much I think you can do it - because you make me feel like that just from being my friend, imagine if we were dating -, I don't want to risk whatever we have, all of us", you gestured to the living room where the rest of the group was.

"Y/N", Charles pleaded, "you don't think I've thought about that? I didn't do it on a whim like you think I did, I've been sitting on this for quite a while, actually", he clarified, "I will respect whatever you decide, okay? But can't just sit and pretend that you don't want this thing between you and me as much as I do, because we could be so good-", he was interrupted as Marta crossed the corner and stepped inside the kitchen, "Charles, can I heat Chiara's soup on the microwave?", she asked with the small tupperware on her hands.

"Sure, here", he guided her as you resumed to seasoning the potatoes, putting them on the tray and then in the oven, "the game is about to start, hurry up!", Joris yelled.

"I'll just wash this, and that too", you took the tupperware's lid as well as the utensils you needed for the dressing.

"I need to cool it down a little, maybe in a bigger bowl", Marta said as Charles helped in getting the bowl from the cupboard as you set the utensils aside to dry, "Merci, Charles, off we go then", she said as she waited for you both to leave and go to the living room so she could follow you.

"Come here, sweet cheeks", you clapped at Chiara, taking her away from your brother's arms and putting her in the highchair so she could eat comfortably, "auntie Y/N is going to give you your delicious soup, yummy yummy", you smiled.

Charles couldn't help but take in the sight, how you made Chiara feel like she was the only person in the world as you smiled and spoke to her, finding a million and one ways to get her to eat the soup in the bowl.

The food was ready by the half-time break, so you all helped with bringing the food to the table, eating it as the team you were supporting ended up winning the game.

"She's knocked out", you pointed out to Riccardo, Chiara asleep in the little makeshift cot you made on the sofa with some pillows and blankets to make sure she was warm and secure.

"We can clean up, you guys go home and take this little princess to sleep in her own bed", Charles smiled, stroking the little girl's cheek softly as he watched her peaceful expression.

"You don't mind?", Marta wondered as the three of you nodded, helping the parents gather their daughter's belongings so they could leave, hoping she wouldn't wake up and make it harder for her to fall back asleep.

"Sweet dreams, petite fleur", you cooed as Marta cuddled Chiara into her chest, squeezing her small hand softly before they walked out of the door.

"These need to go on the dishwasher", you sorted through the plates and checked if they were safe to go on the machine as your brother help you.

"We should probably get going", Joris said, not wanting to overstay your welcome, "do you need anything else, Charles? Otherwise, me and Y/N will leave you to it", he said.

"Actually, me and Charles need to talk, if that's okay", you looked at the driver, catching him by surprise before he nodded in agreement.

Joris didn't dwell too much on it like you thought he would, "so you need me to come and pick you up or...?", he trailed before Charles saved you, "don't worry, I've got her", he stated.

When Charles accompanied your twin brother to the door, he was blunt and honest, "She's my sister, but there could be worse guys than you", Joris offered as Charles narrowed his eyes, "Oh, please, do you think I'm that blind? I've seen the way you look at her and how you always go above and beyond for her - she's just being too stubborn about it to see it, too. Still, if you ever break her heart or cause her any tears of sadness and anger, you're going to wish I didn't know so much about you", he threatened, although it didn't go as planned as they both laughed, "I trust you, there wasn't anyone I would trust like this", he sighed, "you're just lucky you have brothers, otherwise I might've taken revenge on you", he nudged his shoulder.

"I bet Lorenzo would enjoy a cuddle every now and again if you'd like", Charles giggled before he showed his seriousness again, "I just want this to work out between us, I think she's my person, you know?", he mused, realising how cliché and whipped he sounded, "I'll take care of her, you don't need to worry", he assured.

Charles closed the door and walked back to the living room where you sat down on the sofa, legs covered with one of the blankets, "I- thank you for staying back", he smiled, pointing with his eyes to the spot next to you silently asking if he could sit.

You opened the blanket so he could sit next to you and you could both keep warm, "I want to apoligise for not saying anything the last time we spoke, and for how I've handled this", you began, "I'm sorry, Charles", you said earnestly.

"Apology accepted", he nodded, "and did you just stay here to apoligise?", he quesioned.

"I- I thought we could have a date, sort of anyway", you mumbled, "and I could also tell you how I feel about you since it seems I owe you that with what you've told me", you looked into his eyes, "it wasn't that you were ever off bounds or anything like that, I never cared for those supposed rules, but it never occurred to me", you blurted and Charles quirked a brow, "shoot, that's not what I meant, ugh", you grunted as he soothingly rubbed your thigh, "what I meant is I always thought you'd never look at me that way - I'm Joris' twin - so I just took all of the affection I had for you and put it in a friendship feelings and all of the things you did for me, I thought you were just being nice because you're a nice guy", you clarified.

"Does this mean you're letting me treat you like you deserve? Because I plan on making sure you feel and know you're wonderful every single day", he smiled charmingly, confident words contrasting with his shy attempt of lacing your fingers together on his lap.

"How can you be so sure we are eachother's person?", you couldn't help but mumble, even if the butterflies in your stomach were dancing like they hadn't been in a long time, "I just know, and I'll help you see it, too", he smiled, kissing your knuckles before he pulled you to his chest, finding something to watch on the TV.

You both watched reruns of one of your favourite shows, pointing out little details you loved and talking about any topic that came to mind, and once Charles' body warmth and his touches along your arm caught up to your system and lulled you to sleep, your head finding it's spot on his chest as he smiled down at you, your beauty never ceasing to amaze him as he noticed every mole, freckle and scar on your face from up close.

Even if he didn't want to move, and that it wouldn't be the first time he slept on his sofa, he reasoned that he should at least offer you his bed. Softly stroking your cheek, he coaxed you to wake up, "I'm sorry for waking you up, but we can't sleep here", he whispered, kissing the side of your head, "you can sleep in my bed, I'll take the sofa", he offered as you stretched a little bit, removing yourself from his chest.

"If you promise you won't do any funny business, we can sleep in the same bed", you yawned.

"Of course I won't, Y/N! I would never do anything you didn't want to, I-", Charles panicked, not wanting you to think he was trying to take advantage of you.

"I'm only kidding, I know you won't", you assured, arms pulling him to stand up with you as you walked to the bedroom after turning everything off, "I trust you, Charles, completely", you smiled.

To him, it meant the world.

You felt his heart race when your hand landed on his chest, "I need a t-shirt, though, this is not comfy to sleep in", you reasoned as he looked for one on his drawers, "here, you can get ready here while I get ready in the bathroom", he smiled, kissing the top of your head before he stepped inside the ensuite.

After you swapped so you could brush your teeth, you were both undoing the bed, pulling the sheets back over you and having eachother.

"I really want to kiss you right now, but I don't want to cross any boundaries", Charles admitted as your heart raced in your chest, "I'd really like that, you can kiss me if you want", you consented.

Charles leaned to rub your nose in his before kissing your lips softly, allowing you both to revel in the feelings that had been put in labelled boxes at the back of your minds.

Parting your lips to breathe, you cupped Charles' cheek, your palm tickling from his facial hair as your thumb rubbed his skin, "I think you might be right", you mumbled, licking your lips, "about what?", he mused, "about the fact that you'll help me see it too", you smiled.

The next morning, you woke up with Charles looking at you, "Good morning, Y/N", he greeted, "See? I didn't pull any funny business", he wiggled his brows chuckling.

This was a sight you could get used to.

"Good morning", you smiled, "did you sleep well?", you wondered, pulling closer to him now that you were awake.

"I did, did you?", he asked and you nodded, cuddling closer to him and basking in the feeling of just being there.

"We are going to take this as slow as you want", Charles whispered against your forehead, leaving little kisses and pecks on your skin, "but I want you to know I'm all in".

"I'm all in, too", you whispered, "I can't promise you it will be a straight line - or that I won't spiral out every now and again because hey, it's me -, but I feel really good about this, you make me feel really good", you blushed as you kissed between his eyebrows, "having said this, not all of us have the day to do some training and sim racing, and I'm one of them. I have to go home to change and then head to the clinic", you pouted slightly.

"How about I make us some breakfast first, then I'll drop you off?", he suggested, stealing a peck from your lips, "hmm, sounds good", you hummed.

"Were you expecting us to be surprised?", Marta said as she and her family arrived in Charles' yacht, the three of them seeing you and Charles kissing at the table.

Throwing your head back in laughter as Charles walked up to help them inside, you shielded your eyes from the sun with your hand, "at least pretend you are", you joked.

"Oh my Goodness, I never thought you two would become a thing? Does this mean we can finally stop hearing your disgraced love life stories and Charles' complaints about who you went on a date with?", Riccardo belted out, catching the attention from a couple on the yacht next to the one you were sitting on.

"To be fair, that's how I noticed it", Marta began, "Charles didn't complain anymore about how he was alone and that the universe wasn't working on his favour", she smirked, greeting you two.

"We have been keeping it down low just to see how things would go", you blushed at getting caught and steering the conversation elsewhere once Chiara babbled at you, "Oh, baby girl, hello!", you cooed, pulling her into your arms.

"Soon enough you can get one of those, I bet your kid would be very very cute", Riccardo nudged Charles' shoulder, loving that the group now could have a few teasing moments and themes at your expense, all in good fun.

"What a warm welcome!", you heard your brother yell, a fake angry and ironic tone noticeable in his voice, "First, no one is here to greet me with a glass of something to drink or even a helping hand to step in", Joris clarified, "then I'm presented with a conversation about my sister's and my best friends sex life, which I don't want to know about by the way!!", he said as he came up to you, kissing the side of your head, "I'm happy she's happy, and that you're all happy together, but no talking about that, please!".

#charles leclerc imagine #charles leclerc fluff #charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc fanfic #charles leclerc fic #charles leclerc x you #f1 x reader #f1 imagine #f1 fanfic #f1 fluff

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mo0nfairy · 1 year

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Bro when they remade the game of re4, Leon made me want to just....do anything for him. He's just- so- AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH.....You know? And thinking of him as a yandere made me giggle and kicking my feet

part 2. part 3. part 4.

tw :: yandere!leon, obsessive!leon, alcohol, kidnapping, drugging blood, being chained up, insinuations of suicide.

⸺ ommgggg !!! i've been playing the game bit by bit in my free time and im actively going batshit over this man. so here are some of my thoughts……………….

you met leon during the events of RE2 in raccoon city. you ever heard of scary dog privilege? that was basically him with you the entire night. your personal bodyguard, your guard dog. he saved your life over and over and over again until you both practically lost count. however, once you both survived the night and the sun arose, you went your separate ways (much to his dismay). law enforcement and the government were attempting to track down survivors, due to their theories of them having links with umbrella. you had absolutely nothing to do with it, obvi. so, to avoid it all, you vanished. and for 6 long, insufferable years, leon has lived without you. countless therapy sessions, solace in alcohol, and numerous partners who didn’t last longer than a month, nothing could make him forget you.

now (knowing your luck), you just so happen to be one of the missing hikers the police officers speak of in the very beginning of RE4. you were taking a daily stroll through the woods to meditate before you were kidnapped and brought into the los iluminados cult. fortunately for you, you managed to evade being infected. however, you have still spent the last week in sheer misery. running from the village-folk, dodging hidden bear-traps, and scavenging for any crumbs you could consume. you can only dream of the shower you'd take after this nightmare, where you can scrub your skin of the grime, blood, and god knows whatever substances have stained your form. you did befriend a lone wolf, however, so that's a plus!

leon just so happens to be in the same area you're in, only with intentions of saving the president's daughter. he had hoped that by becoming a secret agent, he would be able to manipulate the provided resources and find you. before he knows it, leon soon wakes with a gasp, finding his hands above his head and his wrists chained together. he yanks the chain down, only to hear a quiet voice whisper "hey, quit it!" that voice. leon springs to his feet and turns to verify his suspicions, the sudden movement behind you scaring you into doing the same. he gasps your name in disbelief, before he falls into awed silence while staring at you in complete captivation. you have no fucking idea how much he missed you. all these years of searching for you, dread satiated through him at the possibility of you being dead. leon knows in his heart he would not have the strength to live if you had truly been gone forever. but now, there are no worries. the light of his entire life is alive and by his side! exactly where they belong.

on your end, however, was a complete different story. that night 6 years ago was now an entire blur. umbrella had managed to hunt you down mere days after the event, drugging you with a variety of different remedies. their efforts succeeded and had caused you to almost completely forget that night. your brain has only been able to scrutinize the blood, the death, and the groaning and screaming of undead figures around you. weekly visits with your therapist are helping you disinter forgotten pieces, but leon wasn't present in any of these newfound memories. so, when this stranger whispers your name into the air and stares at you as if you had just descended from heaven itself, you aren’t able to connect the dots.

a smile, one that could rival the sun, breaks out on the face of the mysterious blonde. tears brim in his honeyed gaze. "oh, god. you have no fucking idea how happy i am to finally see you!” holding his hands out, he takes several long strides towards you to engulf you, to where you take several steps away from him.

"who the fuck are you?" his world shatters, "how do you know me? are you the one behind this shit?" your eyes are full of confusion and uncertainty. a major contrast to the look of heroism and gratitude you gazed at him with ages ago.

without another breath, leon pulls the chain towards him, causing you to spring forward. your wrists are tied above your head and your feet are practically dangling off the floor. there are now mere inches in between you and this man. and the look of sheer horror on his face is unforgettable.

"look at me…” his eyes feel like bullets stinging into you, tears spilling down his cheeks. “it- it's me, angel! it’s leon! leon scott kennedy, i worked in the RPD that night 6 years ago.” his breath hits your face as he desperately recounts the worst night of your life. “y/n, i saved your life. and you saved mine. don't you remember?"

leon’s hand cups your face, skin hovering over yours, almost as if he were afraid to fully touch you. his face scrunches up from the sobs racking through his body.

“don’t you know how much i still love you?”

you finally have the revelation that whoever this 'leon scott kennedy' is was with you that night in raccoon city. you also conclude that you are most definitely not getting away from him so easily.

n e ways.... i went wayyyy to overboard with this, but like i said, i've been having some THOUGHTS about re4 and our golden boy. also some other characters too, hehe…………

if you'd like to see more, pls don't be afraid to send some asks in !!

#*sighs dreamily again*#resident evil 4 #re4 #resident evil #leon kennedy #leon kennedy x reader #yandere leon kennedy #yandere resident evil #yandere #gn reader #gender neutral reader #venus’ brain #moonfairy

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junkworldusa · 1 month

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HI I love my copy of Junkworld btw!! Thank you!!

Idk I might have asked you this before or someone else may have but I was wondering if you would talk some about your art practice like. Routine and the like? I think I remember you doing Lynda Barry exercises?

Well either way thank you!!!!

Oliver!!! Yes!!! I'm so glad!

I have to preface this by saying that I don't even work on art every day, much less comics. Last October I picked up knitting on a whim and spent all my free time making hats while listening to an audiobook of Moby-Dick. I made a lino print for the first time while sending out JW #1, fell in love with it, and have spent the last month or so carving and printing and experimenting. I go on painting jags, collage jags, writing jags, and I have two (2) guitars that are sitting in the corner patiently waiting for asteroid Kiana to circle back to them. I've been this way my whole life, and I am trying to work with it and not against it. HOWEVER. There is a hardcore Type A perfectionist inside me that wants nothing but consistency. This part of me abhors the flightiness, the mutations, the bouts of melancholy -- if there must be a Quest, it cries, let it be towards a singular Goal!!!!

For recovering perfectionists there really is no better teacher than Lynda Barry. She has a list of materials, she has dozens of exercises, she has you set time limits. According to her books she is quite a strict teacher in-class, demanding a lot of time, effort, care, and attention. All of this is wonderful. She boxes you in and sets you free.

"Making Comics" is the essential text. My favorite exercise is Monster Jam.

Here are a few of mine, all done left-handed to minimize the influence of the Type A chatter who lives in my brain. I have dozens and dozens of pages of these monsters. Barry recommends this specific process a lot: lay down the lines under pressure before your brain can catch up, then add color/patterns/details, under no pressure at all, while watching/listening to something you like.

There are several iterations after this - you draw their parents, an older sibling, a lover. Then you go back to the beginning and draw, in 6 panels, the story of their life. It somehow always presents itself.

As valuable as they are, I don't use these exercises to actually make comics nowadays. I use them to loosen up and activate that aforementioned feeling. Most of my comics come from doodles or notes scribbled down in a tiny notebook I carry everywhere. The process of making a longform comic is something I have bashed my head against for YEARS, and now involves divination, random image generation, a deck of Nancy cards, a lightbox, and a ton of panels chopped up and spread out on the floor so I can move them around. This is why I still only work in grids!

#2024 #not comics #thank you for the question #also happy belated birthday!!!!!

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ginevrapng · 8 months

Text

content warnings: non explicit drunken sex between james and lily, dubcon/noncon? (idk it's fucked up the drunk sex went wrong), emotional cheating(?), (i really don't know how to tag this one guys- if i've missed something lmk)

// (1.5k words) // best friend!james potter lives in my head rent free, reader not specified which house they're from but has access to the gryffindor common room, chubby reader

best friend!james is completely in denial of his feelings towards you so he spends his days chasing after lily evans. days become months and then become years, flirting with her daily and chasing her. he is a chaser it's what he does.

you constantly scowled him as it seemed like lily had no interest in him. you didn't want him harassing her. when he started showing interest in her it hurt, you knew why of course, it's hard not to fancy the great james potter but you quickly got over your feelings when you realised you had no chance with him, he was your best friend and nothing was going to spoil that.

what surprised everyone was when lily started to treat james nicer, when she started to smile at him in class. no one could have guessed this complete 360 of her feelings. the next time james came up to her in the great hall bugging her he asked her to be his girlfriend and she actually said yes, causing james to pause in shock for a moment and then start grinning. "knew you'd say yes eventually evans."

lily just rolled her eyes and told him to shut up.

you heard about what happened later on in the day and were shocked yourself. you never thought they would actually start dating, she never seemed like she was interested in james before and previously you spent so long trying to tell him to let it go and find someone else but you're happy that he's happy. he's finally got the girl.

so why does he feel so empty?

their relationship was good, they went on dates and lily always laughed at his jokes, he started to pay attention more in classes they were both in together to impress her and it seemed like lily became less stressed and uptight. they're both happy yet james feels something is wrong. even through he still grins from ear to ear, still has that mischievous attitude you love and his pranking nature, even though he's acting the same, he knows being with lily is wrong, he doesn't even know why but being with lily doesn't feel right.

lily and james have been dating for months now and james has been able to ignore that nagging feeling. one gryffindor party changed everything though.

gryffindor beat hufflepuff in a quidditch match and the house was celebrating, even people from other houses came to support gryffindor's win, however they may have came for the drinks because the gryffindor house always throw the best parties. either way everyone was wasted by the end of the night, some more than others. james being one of those, lily being someone who is nearly equally as drunk, even though she swore she wouldn't drink much as to try and keep an eye on everyone however that plan was shattered when sirius and marlene kept passing her drinks every ten minutes.

lily and james later made their way upstairs to be in private as the night started coming to and end and as soon as the door was shut they started making out and clumsily taking off each others clothes before falling onto the bed together. james placed a kiss on her neck, making her moan and breathily say, "jamie, come on, no playing around."

the only person who ever calls him jamie is you, every single person teases you about it but you never relent. in james' drunken brain his conclusion is that he's kissing you.

james could never ignore your requests and gives 'you' what you want, he tried his best to be slow but he couldn't, he thrusted into 'you', who he thought was you and started babbling. "god, i love you so much." lily wraps her legs around him causing him to groan. he says your name. your name. he says he loves you. lily realises what is happening and thinks maybe she misheard there is no way that james doesn't love her, not after how long he's been trying to woo and pursue her. that is until she heard him say your name again.

lily pushes him off her and she stares at him, james cocks his head in confusion. she's drunk and angry and so very confused so she storms out the room and slams the door loudly before going into her room, flinging herself on the bed and crying until she falls asleep. the morning after is confusing for james, he's hungover and doesn't remember anything from last night but he knows that lily is ignoring him.

he finally is able to get her alone after some help from sirius, by saying that he needed her for something before leaving them alone, and james asks her why she's so upset and mad. she scoffs. "leave me alone potter." james winces at her tone, now they're dating she always calls him james and only calls him potter when she's teasing him. she turns around to leave and james chases after her. "we're done james! don't talk to me! don't even look at me!" she spits out venomously. his blood runs cold as he just nods, he's never heard her speak like that before, he thought that maybe if he gives her some time she might tell him whats wrong and he can fix it.

she swivels round and marches back over to him, james thinking that she may have already calmed down before he saw her face. she points her finger to his chest, "another thing potter, were you ever going to tell me?" she hissed.

"tell you what?" james asks softly, trying not to anger her anymore but that doesn't work, if anything it just made her more pissed off.

"that you love her!" she throws her hands up exasperated and full of negative emotions towards him and towards you too, despite this is not your fault. james furrows his eyebrows, unaware of what she was talking about or who's she referring too.

"you're in love your best friend! when was you going to tell me james, huh? a year from now, ten years from now? on our wedding day?" she screams at him, not caring if anyone heard.

"oh," james replies quietly, his body posture relaxing.

"oh? is that all you've got to say to me?" she shouts at him.

"yeah. basically. i'll- i'll see you around evans. i really am sorry." james tells her, not really knowing what to say to her before he walks off.

lily's blood boils as he reacts so calmly and doesn't try to defend himself in the slightest. he doesn't try to fight for her. he has the gall to walk away from her.

he spends the majority of his day holed up in his room. he wasn't sure what happened last night but he knows it must have been serious. he's now single. even though she never said the words "we're breaking up" or "i'm dumping you" it was worse. lily hates him and he's now confronted with his feelings. can he really stay in denial and pretend he's not in love with you if lily knows, what if she's told the others. what if she's told you?

he rushes down into the common room, nearly tripping and falling on his way down. he has no idea where you'll be and sirius has the marauders map, maybe you'll be in the gryffindor common room hanging with everyone but you also like the library but you also like- "been look for you everywhere, where've you been all day?" he's interrupted by his train of thoughts by you. he lets out a sigh of relief, you're right here and even if lily has told you you're still cheerfully smiling at him. "jamie, you alright?" you looked concerned after noticing he's just staying silent and not moving.

suddenly he pulls you to him and hugs you tightly, making you giggle. "jamie, this is great and all but you're crushing me." he reluctantly lets go of you and takes you in. your comfy warm clothes you're wearing due to the weather that james finds highly annoying because your clothes are so baggy that he can hardly see your body, he wishes he could see your round frame and your cute soft tummy and plush thighs but you always complain about it being too cold. he looks softly at you, your hair is all messy and windswept, chipped nails from when you've been biting them and picking them because of exams coming up and chubby cheeks prominent as you smile, you look beautiful, perfect.

you put your hands on your hips and look cross at him, playfully, not like lily, but like you're not actually cross, it's not in your nature to stay seriously mad at him. "i've got a bone to pick with you." james freezes up, worried that lily's told you. "why the hell is lily ignoring me? sometimes it's like she's shooting daggers at the back of my head."

james chuckles, "ignore her. we broke up earlier on today." you thought he'd be more torn up about it but he's beaming at you.

"i'm so sorry jamie," you tell him earnestly, grabbing his hands in yours and holding them to your chest.

his heart jumps at how much you care for him. "i promise it's fine. i've realised she was never the one for me." you were about to question what he means by that and to ask him to elaborate and if that means he broke up with her but before you can do that you hear the laughs and chatter of the other marauders come in, they heard that lily and james broke up and came to console him, thinking that he'll be away from everyone in his room only to find him in the common room grinning and laughing, when they saw he was with you it made sense.

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fudanshidoublevision · 2 months

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It's pretty funny how the three love interests have something in common 。。。。besides their obvious interest (Haley) and obsession (Double Vision and Ray) towards the MC of the game.

The three of them smoke, which might be something banal for some but I like to hold into small details like these and make up stuff.

Haley takes smoke breaks, Ray smokes when he is in your apartment and Double isn't shown smoking in the game but he does on his birthday illustration. ᶘ ⊙ᴥ⊙ᶅ

Not sure if that was on purpose or just a coincidence but either way, it makes sense to me.

Ray, especially, the fact that he smokes.

Considering that he spent most of his pre-teen and teenage years until he was 18 years old living with Steel Sheriff and remember, Steel Sheriff is a shitty person and a BAD influence, so it makes sense that maaaybe that bad habit was influenced by that horrendous man and Ray took a hold into it.

Ray strikes me as the type of guy who's addicted to nicotine and honestly? I don't blame him at all, that man went through so much shit since he came out of his mother's womb so if he EVEN chain smokes, it wouldn't faze me at all.

Not sure if Ray smokes only at night but someone dear to me does and well, the only time of the day Ray is completely free of any duty is at night, as far as i've seen? Also, smoking at night sounds...right to me, he takes notice of you and opens the window so he isn't stinking up your place...which is surprising, the only smokers I know always smoke in secluded places and I can smell it all the way into my bedroom. ʕʘ̅͜ʘ̅ʔ

I'm aware that nicotine has some benefits but we are talking about Ray, who is freaking Binary Star, HIS ABILITY???? EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM. /j This man does not GAF about the side effects or the benefits of smoking. Out of the three I believe that Ray is free from any illnesses or any type of side effects, heh.

Now, Haley, they are shapeshifter...? Correct me if I'm wrong, im an amateur on the Haley department. Crazy idea but imagine if they smoke on their cat form, holy fucking shit. Their brain, gastrointestinal system or even their heart is not safe though...but I believe that they can easily shift into any animal with the strongest lungs ever and live another day without being worried about any complications? Huh, this sounds batshit crazy so I think I'll stop writing this part.

Like Ray, Haley seems to smoke as a sedative, what if they smoke herbal cigarettes? Also, I believe that they can easily quit if they want to (heh, now that I'm reading this part i forgot that this is something most addicts say, LOL.) , which I beg to differ when it comes to Ray or Double, I don't judge them, just an observation I guess.

At last, my favorite character and current obsession, Double Vision.

Cigarette smoking, yeah but what about vaping? He looks like the type of guy that would vape or maybe is it too tame for him? Maybe he wants something stronger. Wait, does anyone really need a reason to smoke? ಠಿ_ಠ

People say that vaping is less hazardous than smoking but to me? It's the same thing, most e-cigarretes contain nicotine but yeah, you are inhaling smoke from burning tobacco when you smoke a cigarette. I don't know anything about vaping. It's pretty popular in my country though, never tried it but my friend told me that vaping feels and tastes different from smoking, so I believe their judgement.

Forgive my yapping, like I was saying! He isn't safe from the lung cancer, at all. Yeah, this man can do sick tricks with the smoke, for sure... I'm not going to name any because I might be wrong but you name it and maaaaaaaybe he would be capable of doing it, if you can do something for him back, of course. Oh, I'm 100% sure this freakazoid throws the smoke in your face on purpose, I find that hot actually...if only my nostrils and eyes could say the same about that. If he does that, I'll be coughing like I have asthma until I die.

Hmm, I can't think of when he started smoking...maybe on his teenage years? After all, I think it was at that time that he started to get along with shady people and ugly business. The power of influence and their ambience might be a big factor of this habit on these guys. Heavy on Ray.

That's everything I could think of. For now.

If you are a real person, don't smoke, I guess?. Do whatever you want BUT DON'T BE TELLING ANYONE THAT TUMBLR USER fudanshidoublevision encouraged you to do it.

If you are fictional character, yassss smoke all you want beautiful inexistent individual, you don't exist after all!

GODDAMN!!!!!! I MIGHT START SMOKING RIGHT NOW IF I CAN LOOK THIS HOT 😍😍😍 GIVE ME THAT CIGARETTE 🔥🔥🔥

#binary star hero #bsh double vision #bsh haley #bsh ray #binary star #my goofy ahh writing #actually i feel like this post doesn't deserve this tag but rather #overnalyzing writing

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drunk-on-dk · 1 year

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wow my first time here for hard hours…

headempty just brothersbff!dokyeom coming over to u (and ur brothers) house for da first time to tutor ur brother cuz he’s a lil braindrad,, still unknowning of the houses’ layout,, dokyeom walks into you fingering urself and observes how ur fingers r way too short to do anything rly pleasurable n helps u like the good friend he is :(( I WANNA WRITE AB THIS SO BAD BUT WRITERS BLOCK IS SO CRAY!!!

lee..... you're kidding me.... please come here for hard hours whenever because this made my brain turn in ways that I cannot explain..... ok so I thought this would be a drabble, but I spiraled below and I HOPE YOU ENJOY (also i've been struggling with writer's block so this totally helped get my creative thoughts running again thx u)

Prompt/Pairing: Brother's Best Friend!Seokmin x fem!reader

Genre: SMUT just pure filth (minors DNI)

w/c: ~2.5k (not a DRABBLE oops)

content warnings and prompt under the cut

c/w: no pronouns, but fem bodied reader; masturbation; use of a vibrator; walking in on reader, but consent is KEY when continuing; DK has long fingers AKA pro at fingering in this

Lee Seokmin, kindly referred to as DK, a nickname coined by your idiotic brother years ago when he had first met the overly kind boy back in grade school. DK was an all-rounder, which was known very well throughout your years trailing your brother and him in school. Of course, DK was popular for his looks, overall bright attitude, humorous side, and intelligence.

The boy was an enigma throughout his entire high school career, so you had no choice but to crush on your brother’s best friend. You couldn’t help it when he’d flash you his signature smile every time he’d pick you and your brother up for school, or when he'd gift you the occasional snack on exam mornings – which, of course, would go untouched in your backpack since you cherished the sacred gift so much.

However, you were able to see him at his worst over the years, especially the clumsier and louder sides of him when he’d spend the night over at your house almost every weekend. His boisterous voice would permeate through closed doors - even when he was a few rooms away - while your brother and he would play video games until the crack of dawn. Another oddity included that time he had mistaken your toothbrush as his own for weeks on end, only admitting his fault weeks later when he had run into you in the hallway late one night, almost as if he was fearful that you’d confront him even though you had no clue.

Eventually, you grew annoyed with the boy as you got older, your high school crush no longer blinding you to the fact that he was just another one of your brother’s loud, teasing friends, even if he was damn cute. Regardless, Dokyeom still took care of you like you were his own friend, as you were close in age to your brother, and he always considered you as part of the group. He was always sure to include you in plans even if your brother didn’t, making sure you had a comfortable high school experience, and continuing to gift you snacks on exam days – even if you didn’t blush profusely like you used to.

Unfortunately, or fortunately, you had followed in your brother’s footsteps and decided to attend the same college as him, which ironically enough, DK had chosen the same college as well. The duo was still thriving more than ever even when they had found other friends in their separate majors. DK was also still roped into tutoring your brother in his classes, even though he had passed them semesters ago himself.

You had just moved in with your brother after your first year, and you two had decided to save some money and just commit to sharing an apartment a mile off campus. It was easy living with him, especially because you two had similar friend groups and could comfortably coexist. You also enjoyed the privacy it gave you, as your brother spent most of his time at his frat house even though he had his own place, typically crashing on one of his brothers’ futons every weekend.

You took advantage of this, blasting music when you’d get ready for your own nights out, or spending nights like tonight shamelessly binging a show or whatever book you were reading, eventually getting bored and pleasuring yourself in the serenity of your quiet apartment.

It was still early in the night, but, good God, you had been strung out all week. Midterms were finally coming to an end, and all you could think about was a little R&R, possibly channeling that energy through a quick orgasm.

However, it was anything but quick tonight. You had been squirming around for maybe half an hour now, a slight sheen to your flushed skin, and a vibrator pressed firmly against your clit after you decided your fingers wouldn’t suffice.

Your sheets were surely a mess at this point from how tightly you were gripping them from desperately chasing the high that your body wouldn’t grant you. Just when you thought you were close, a pathetic half-moan would leave your lips every time the building pleasure would ebb away.

You were frustrated, but you were determined. Pulling out all the tricks now, your spare hand and fingers played with your perked nipples, unable to restrain your body from arching into the bed to further press your throbbing clit against the devilish, vibrating toy.

The only thing that broke you out of your wanton fervor was a single knock at your bedroom door – which the knock was appreciated, giving you just enough time to scramble to cover yourself with a throw blanket, but whoever the intruder was waited for just a pause before throwing your door open – coming eye to eye with none other than the boisterous DK.

“Ready to study and then whoop some ass on -" DK stopped mid-sentence, jaw slack as his backpack fell to his side upon realizing this was not your brother's room. To be fair, DK had only been here once or twice since you and your brother moved apartments recently; your previous one had a roof-leak, and this place was temporary until the latter would be renovated by the end of the semester.

Surely, you both looked like deer in headlights staring at each other. DK surveyed you for a second, saucer-like eyes tracing you from head to toe, drinking in the way your chest rose and fell underneath the tiny, fluffy throw blanket that gave you some sense of decency. You could almost see the lightbulb go off in DK’s head when he realized what he had walked into, the not-so-quiet whirring of the vibrator in the background only confirming his suspicions.

“Oh my god,” he starts, internally cursing himself when his jeans begin to tighten ever so slightly around his crotch. It’s almost as if he forgot how to walk or speak, but he can’t deny that this is a fantasy he’s had one too many times. “Were you-?”

“Don’t,” you cut him off, already immensely embarrassed that he walked in on you so hot-and-bothered. It was almost comical how the vibrating sound came to a halt, awkwardly searching for the button on the toy beneath the sheet and finally successfully turning the device off. “We can just act like this never happened, my brother isn’t here since I’m assuming that’s who you were looking for, and we can just go about our night without discussing further.”

Woefully, you could almost get off to the sight of just him, maybe you’d tuck the memory of him into your arsenal to finally finish yourself off later tonight. You weren’t sure if it was the arousal that was clouding your mind from touching yourself for so long, but you swore you’d never seen his kind eyes look so dark and carnal. And fuck, he looked good as per usual, boyishly handsome in denim jeans, and a white tee hugging his biceps perfectly.

You felt even more flustered when he just continued to stare at you, not making any effort to lift the backpack at his feet, nor to exit your room when you look at him expectantly. With a groan, you run a hand over your beet-red face, about to question if he is going to leave until he speaks before you do.

“Are you just going to return to what you were doing?” His voice is strained, deeper in tone than his typically chirpy sound.

You stare back at him dumbly, readjusting the blanket around your body so you can sit comfortably on the side of your bed. “M-Maybe, why does it matter to you? Like I said, we can just forget about this.”

He does the opposite of what you’d expect, rather than leaving your room he takes a step towards you. The heat burns in your belly even more, your body reacting and tingling each step he takes closer towards you.

“How long have you been alone in here?” It’s so out of character how hazy and stormy his eyes become, how husky his voice sounds, and how you feel your increasing heartbeat at your core when you realize just how big and tall he is.

“U-um,” you squeak out, shriveling in his presence, unsure of where all his confidence came from as he continues to eye you down. Maybe it’s the nerves, but you begin to spill out details of the frustrating night you’ve had thus far. “It’s been a long week DK - I just needed to unwind. My damn fingers won’t get the job done, so I’m using this stupid toy. This is pathetic and embarrassing, and why are you getting so close to me?”

“Can you show me?” He asks almost innocently, voice soft and tempting as he kneels in front of where you’re sitting on the bed. He repeats himself when you fail to stutter out a response. “Can you show me how you were using your fingers?”

You feel like you’re in a trance, heart, and body reacting before your sensible mind can stop you. This is a bad idea, you should just say no and kick him out, but the way his eyes remained locked on yours as you slowly nod is enough to encourage you to drop the blanket wrapped around you. Screw it, even as much as you'd like to say your crush on him faded, it never really did.

He lets out a strained sigh when you reveal your body to him, the only thing covering you is the flimsy tank top that’s bunched at your waist, only indicating further how desperate you had been.

“Are you OK with showing me?”

“Y-yes,” you gasp out, gradually opening your legs for him to see your most intimate self, evidence of an impending orgasm clear from the sight of your swollen clit and wet thighs from your dripping slit. The whimper that escapes his lips makes your eyes roll back, fingers absentmindedly tracing over your folds and making you whimper with him.

“You’re so wet, sweetheart,” he’s whispers as he intently watches the pad of your thumb rub at your clit, “Such small hands and little fingers, no wonder you’ve been touching yourself for so long.”

You buck your hips upwards when you finally let your pointer and middle fingers glide in between your folds, carefully pumping the two in and out of yourself and biting back a moan when DK leans even closer towards your core.

“It’s not enough,” your voice is breathy as you pout, grinding your hips into the palm of your hand as your fingers do a not-so-satisfactory job. You’re falling back now, wrapped up in your arousal once again as your head hits the pillowy mattress beneath you.

“Of course, it’s not,” DK coos, standing up to tower above where you now lay, one knee finding real estate between your legs as you so urgently keen into your hand. “You can fit another finger inside of you, maybe that will help.”

You listen to him, fitting a third finger inside of you, yet they don’t reach deep enough to provide you enough pleasure.

“Oh,” he almost sounds patronizing, “they’re too short, aren’t they?”

You’d almost think he was messing with you if it wasn’t for the way his breathing picked up when you let out a desperate cry, a rough groan bubbling from his chest when your thighs tightened around his own leg slotted between yours.

“Yeah, t-they are,” you cry out, trying your hardest to not shift down the bed and start grinding against his leg.

“Can I help?”

“God, I thought you’d never ask. P-Please.”

Just like that, DK’s deft fingers are at your core, long digits running between your folds to collect your slick before teasingly probing at your center.

“I said please,” you moan out, practically begging as your hips chase his hand when he continues to pump just the tips of his fingers tauntingly and shallowly inside of you.

He almost growls when his fingers fill you completely, the way your walls sucked him in was enough to have him wanting more. In order to get closer to you, DK collapses next to you, one thigh still slotted between your legs and his free arm propping him up above where your heated chest rises with each needy breath.

“You take my fingers so well, sweetheart,” he whines out, unable to stop himself from pressing his lips against your neck especially when your body is arching against his with each pump of his fingers inside you. “Can’t believe you're still this tight after playing with yourself for so long.”

Your own hands are desperately gripping his arms, nails digging into the firm muscles as he trails hot kisses across your neck and chest. Your body shakes in need when he hits a spot deep inside of you, pressing against that spongey spot that has your thighs tensing up with each expert curl of his long fingers.

You know you’re babbling at this point, something about how good he’s making you feel, something about how hot he is, something about how you’ll need his fingers all the time now.

This only eggs DK on, his supporting arm shaking as he sets a brutal pace, fingers pumping in and out and each ministration feeling delicious against your walls. You let out a scream when his thumb encounters your clit, making him press even closer against you to hold your needy hips down as he fingers you so perfectly.

You’ve been encapsulated by him at this point, everything about him is big and tall and long, and your mind goes a bit haywire wondering if that applied to really everything, the obvious bulge contained by his jeans only making your mind wander to dirtier places.

“Is this enough, sweetheart?” His lips are pressed into your neck, teeth nipping gently at the shell of your ear as he desires to hear some more praise and feedback from you.

“God,” you moan out, thighs shaking as his thumb rolls in circles over your clit, chest pressing against his as he smiles against your ear. This isn’t enough – actually – you want all of him. But yet it is, the world around you begins to spin as you feel your impending release finally bursting inside of you. “Fuck, this is more than enough. God, I’m g-gonna finish.”

“Finish, sweetheart, use my fingers.”

You’ve never come so hard from just fingers, not even with past lovers, but DK’s long fingers have your walls spasming and tightening around them, hips finally falling still as you gush around the digits. You feel euphoric, your release washing over your body as you come to.

You thought maybe your post-orgasm clarity would snap you back into reality, reminding you that you just had the best fingering of your life from your brother’s best friend, making the situation awkward and panicking upon realization, but you do exactly the opposite.

“Do you need help now, DK?”

#seventeen smut #svt smut #svthub #lee seokmin smut #dokyeom smut #dk smut #lee dokyeom smut #seokmin smut #thank you lee <3 ily for this #asks 🌙#lovely moots 💫

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epicbuddieficrecs · 3 months

Text

Throwback Rec!

Helloooooooo!

I've mentioned this when I first started the blog, but unlike with my previous rec blogs, there was quite a long period of time between the time when I started reading buddie fics and when I started this blog (live, five-ish months). Consequently, there's a lot of fics I've read during that period that I've never recced! So I thought I'd try to do a "Throwback" rec once in a while to rec these fics. Enjoy!

this must be the place by euadnes/ @kananjarus (Canon Divergent, Post-Shooting | 75K | Teen): Every life altering event is often led up to with a series of other important events. In this case, there were at least three: An unstoppable fire. An afternoon spent underneath a blanket of California blue sky. But firstly, and maybe the most important of all: There was the impeccable aiming of an ex-sharpshooter. *** Or, the Buck is also shot by the sniper AU that no one asked for.

🔥 Benign Fatality by EtoileGarden/ @etoilegarden (Time Loop AU, Season 2-4 | 23K | Teen): Buck repeats days until he doesn't die in them, has an underdeveloped sense of self worth, and Eddie is the one who wants to step in with him.

must be some kind of twist, I could get used to this by soyxunxperdedor/ @messyhairdiaz (Post-S4, Accidental Marriage | 38K | Explicit): He doesn’t remember much from last night, even less after the fourth or fifth tequila shot. So he certainly doesn’t remember bringing someone back to his room. He steels himself for the lancing pain and cracks his eyes open. Oh. Oh no. This is either really bad or… Well, not really good, but just. Not really bad, and that’s probably all Buck can ask for it to be. Because Eddie is in his bed, Eddie’s arm is wrapped around his waist, Eddie’s legs are tangled with his. And he has no idea why.

🔥 in the night we trust by glorious_spoon/ @glorious-spoon (Canon Divergent, Pre-S4 | 29K | Explicit): Eddie and Buck start sleeping together when they're all stuck at Buck's place during lockdown. It still takes them almost three years to notice that they're in love.

🔥 Didn't think you meant it by EtoileGarden/ @etoilegarden (Friends to Fiancés to Lovers, Post-S5 | 33K | Explicit): “I want - I want to get to - to have some sort of - of promise that I’m… loved. And. And worthy. And that I get to always go to bed knowing I’m - I’m fully, like, mentally, physically, legally committed to this person who - who’ll always have my back, who’ll always - always be there when I need them. But I guess,” Buck shook his head. “I guess I’m starting to really - really believe that maybe I’m not actually built for that. For - for someone actually wanting to commit to me, to marry me. So I - I think seeing the wedding today just kinda cemented in my brain that no one would want to marry me.” “I’d marry you,” Eddie said, patted his knee.

🔥 standing on the brink of emptiness by woodchoc_magnum/ @woodchoc-magnum (Post-Shooting | 71K | Mature): In which Eddie is struggling in the aftermath of being shot, learning how to take care of himself and realising he's in love with Buck; and Buck is dating Taylor, taking care of Eddie and Christopher and trying to figure out why he's so goddamn confused about everything.

🔥 Muscle Memory by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Amnesia AU | 40K | Teen): After a disappointment in his personal life, Buck wakes up one morning to find everyone he loves has forgotten him completely. No memories. No recognition. Almost like he was never really there.

oh, my dream (never quite as it seems) by woodchoc_magnum/ @woodchoc-magnum (S6, Friends with Benefits | 44K | Explicit): In which Buck and Eddie are trying out a friends-with-benefits thing (that's rapidly turning into more) when the world comes crashing down on them. As Buck hovers somewhere between life and death, Eddie has to deal with their friends, family and the Buckley parents.

It’s Not the Roaring Dream, It’s the Silent Lightning by giselleslash (Coma AU | 15K | Mature): Buck gets struck by lightning and wakes up in another life where he has everything he’s ever wanted, but soon that life starts to crumble around him and the painful pull back into reality nearly breaks his heart. (or the one where Buck is married to Eddie in a coma dream and he doesn’t want to let the dream go.)

found a park bench for a throne by withoutthetiger / @rewritetheending (Post-S6 | 23K | Teen): Set in S7, when Buck goes back to therapy and Eddie is there to comfort him after each session, much like Buck did for him in 5x14. They're friends, of course, but Eddie can only soothe Buck for so long before it becomes impossible to deny that they're also so much more.

I love the way you spoil me, baby by rosebuddiekin/ @giddyupbuck (Sugar Daddy Buck AU | 33K | Explicit): Buck is a sugar daddy who wants to spoil Eddie rotten and take care of everything for him. Eddie has never had that sort of relationship but is willing to give it a try. There is plenty of adventure along the way.

🔥 In the Gray You are Golden by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels (Zombie Apocalypse AU | 26K | Explicit): When the world fell apart, Eddie did his best to keep his son safe. But now winter's coming on, their supplies are dwindling, and Christopher needs medical attention, so Eddie takes the chance to move them across the country to the west coast, where the rumored 118 Safezone takes in all survivors. Buck's proud to be a member of the 118's search and rescue teams, but he can't shake the conviction that his lost sister is still alive in the wasteland. When he sneaks out to find her, he runs into Eddie and Chris instead, and vows to get them to the 118 safely. But the wasteland has many ways of tearing people apart, and the undead are just one trick up its sleeve...

🔥 you and me by woodchoc_magnum/ @woodchoc-magnum (S6 Fix-It | 55K | Mature): An alternate ending to Season 6, where Buck realises that what he's been searching for has been right in front of him the whole time.

🔥 The Education of Eddie Diaz by mansikka (Pre-S4, Friends With Benefits | 32K | Explicit): Eddie doesn't really know how it happened. One moment the 118 are drunk in a bar after a hard shift, confessions slipping from his mouth as he playfully kisses Buck on the cheek. The next he is on Buck's couch, taking up Buck's offer of an education that could be asking for trouble. But it's just sex, and they're just friends; it doesn't mean anything to either of them. So why is his time alone with Buck the highlight of his week?

🔥 i see you in my sheets (i see you in my sleep) by elless (Post-S6A, Friends with Benefits | 25K | Explicit): Buck and Eddie are FWB, act like boyfriends, and are suuuuper dumb and oblivious about everything.

🔥 a bleeding sun on a silver screen by rarakiplin (gmontys)/ @hoediaz (Actors AU, Friends With Benefits | 130K | Mature): One day, Buck will tell an interviewer that he would be happy to make movies with Eddie Diaz until the day he dies. But first, years before that, he sees Eddie for the first time on the set of Chimney’s fifth movie.

handle me with care by woodchoc_magnum/ @woodchoc-magnum (Canon to S6E9, Getting Together | 42K | Mature): In which Eddie tries dating again, and slowly comes to terms with his feelings for Buck.

Your Kiss Might Kill Me (So Won't You Kill Me) by morganofthefairies (PWP, BDSM | 9K | Explicit): Buck hadn’t been a virgin by the time he’d hit Peru – not even close. He still considered Peru a critical point in his sexual history, though, because Peru had brought him Fiona, and he was pretty sure he could credit her with like 80% of his sexual knowledge. None of that was the point, though. The point was that, six years later, when Eddie called for the jaws to get to a woman pinned in her car while responding to an 8-car pileup, and absentmindedly called him a good boy as Buck handed them over, he had a totally normal reaction to it.

#epic buddie fic rec #buddie #buddie fic #buddie fanfiction #buddie fanfic #buddie fic rec

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1d1195 · 9 months

Text

Traditional Extra II

How about another check in on these guys?

2.8k+ words

Just a little something kicking around in my brain. (I've got a bit of baby fever going on over here on these last few I know--I'll move away from babies for my next update)

You can read Traditional here

Her shyness was adorable. It was entirely too early to have this conversation. They’d only officially been dating for less than three months. But they also lived together. And worked together. He was crossing his fingers and hoping the earliness or suddenness didn’t matter.

She knocked on the door with Harry’s tea in hand. Even though she was no longer an intern, it was one way to get her little dose of Harry while at work even on the busiest of days until they could get home. She craved seeing Harry. Being near him made her instantly happy. Stealing kisses at work was one of her new favorite past times, and Harry found himself unbelievably happy about those, too. It didn’t matter that they ate dinner together, snuggled up watching TV, or fell asleep spooning. The little fifteen-minute teatime in the afternoon was enough to make her extra dizzy with love for him.

However, today she was surprised to find a little baby, sitting alone, in a round little activity seat. He babbled to himself as she entered, and she smiled immediately. “Well, hello,” she cooed. Placing Harry’s tea on his desk she smiled curiously at the little one. “Who are you?” She asked him and knelt in front of him playing. He wasn’t quite a toddler, but maybe a bit over a year old. He was simply adorable: soft wispy hair, beautiful round eyes. She was immediately in love.

She always did well with babies. Her smile was warm and maternal. In college, she spent some of her time tutoring and babysitting when people inquired. Little ones always enjoyed her gentle nature. Honestly, she was definitely one of those women who wanted a tribe of her own little cuties to follow her around one day in the future. The baby gurgled, hitting the different activities around his seat. He smiled at her, a bit of drool falling from his little perfect lips, and he reached out making a grabbing motion with one hand. She waved back at him. She held out her finger so he could grasp his squishy little hand around it. “Hi,” she giggled again. “Did you get here all by yourself?” She asked him which of course led to no response, but he enjoyed her voice and gave her a big, drooly smile in return. The door opened and in walked three people. “Oh hi,” she glanced over her shoulder as Harry closed the door behind them. “I brought your tea.”

“Hi,” he said awkwardly. “Um...”

“You have a baby,” she said. “Did I miss something?”

The two people with him smirked. “Hi, love,” the woman said. “I’m Sarah, this is Mitch. We’re Harry’s friends.”

“Oh, the ones he doesn’t pay,” she smiled.

Harry rolled his eyes. “I like her,” Mitch whispered toward him but so she could still hear.

“Your baby is very cute,” she said poking at some of the toys while the baby kept a firm grasp on her hand.

“We’ve heard so much about you,” Sarah said sweetly crouching down beside the baby and activity seat next to her. “Hi, cutie pie,” she kissed his little nose making him giggle excitedly. “Would you like to hold him?”

“Yes,” she answered immediately, almost before Sarah finished her question. The three snickered at her. Sarah lifted the baby out of the seat and held him out to the waiting girl.

“Sometimes he is fussy with new people,” Mitch warned. He usually grabbed handfuls of hair and screamed every now and again.

She nodded. “That’s okay, must be scary getting passed around a bunch of people that aren’t Mumma and Dadda, huh?” She asked the little one who still nuzzled against her neck effortlessly, not worried at all that she was a stranger. He may have been fussy sometimes, but it seemed today wouldn’t be one of those days.

“Well, he definitely likes you, hmm?” Sarah laughed rubbing his little back as she held him.

“I have a wide-open face that babies love,” she explained. “I think I look like a teddy bear.”

Harry was speechless. He wanted to introduce his other best friends to his girlfriend. He would like to say she looked nothing like a teddy bear, but instead a beautiful angel with a halo around her head. But instead, he was tongue-tied watching her with the baby. She was a natural and his heart was aching with longing. His brain started imagining her holding a little one that looked like the perfect combination of the two of them. “Harry, you’re staring,” Mitch muttered under his breath, this time so no one could hear but Harry.

Shaking his head quickly to pull him out of his daydream, he knelt beside the two women and smiled at the baby. “Mitch and Sarah were jus’ saying they wanted t’have a date night jus’ the two of them,” Harry explained. He reached out to cup the side of the baby’s face. Harry’s palm was the same width as the side of his little head. His thumb skimmed over his hair gently, brushing his ear making the baby’s eyes flutter shut. “I sort of volunteered myself t’watch him,” he explained. “We were jus’ putting his sippy cups in the fridge.”

She smiled. “Could I help watch him too, if it’s alright with you guys?” She asked Sarah and Mitch. She didn’t want to make the parents uncomfortable. Of course, they trusted Harry, but she was a stranger. It was nice to let her hold the cutie pie, but she wouldn’t expect a whole night if they didn’t want it.

“We wouldn’t leave the baby alone with just Harry,” Mitch smiled. Harry rolled his eyes at the joke. He’d been left alone with the baby plenty of times before. It happened that some of those evenings he hadn’t spent with her over the last year were spent with the baby.

“We sort of expected you two to be a package deal,” Sarah winked at her.

Harry adored the blush that painted her cheeks. She liked that—being a package deal. Harry liked it too. “Mitch and Sarah are leaving me with their car,” Harry explained.

“You going to be good for Uncle Harry?” Sarah asked the baby. He giggled reaching for him. He crawled into Harry’s embrace. Giggling and bouncing as Harry placed his feet on his lap.

“We always have a lot of fun, don’t we lad,” he murmured kissing the top of his head. “Would y’mind leaving early?” Harry asked the girl beside him.

“You’re the boss,” she reminded him, standing now while Harry stayed put on the floor with the baby. “I just follow orders. I am working on something with Niall right now. I’ll have to finish that up.”

“That’s fine. We’re not leaving for at least an hour. Some business to attend to,” Sarah smiled. “Harry is going to invest in our new music label, supposedly.”

“Oh, how lovely!” She said excitedly. “I’ll send the paperwork to you once I get back to my office,” she said for Harry’s benefit. His heart warmed over with adoration for her once more; anticipating his needs. It was quite the quality she had.

“Surprised Harry doesn’t have you in here with him,” Mitch said with the sound of delight in his voice. Harry glared at the carpet bitterly.

“He tried, but Niall beat him in an arm-wrestling contest,” she explained. “He’ll tell you—”

“The table had water on it!” He was still quite sore about it and wished Niall had given him a rematch. The whole predicament was laughable to her but still very upsetting to Harry. He wanted her around all the time.

“—his arm slipped,” she finished ignoring Harry’s interruption.

“They arm-wrestled over you?” Sarah laughed. “Harry Styles, the poor girl is not a trophy!”

Harry knew that and found himself rolling his eyes as he played with the little one to keep his mind occupied and not wallowing in pity over the fact that she was down the hall most of the time. Even though they drove in to work with one another, back home together, and of course lived in the same house. She insisted that as CEO he should have his own space. Niall liked to remind him of the time he threw the keyboard in her presence—of course he would never hurt her, but where would he put her in his office so she would be out of the line of fire when Harry became that agitated again? It was better for his simmering temper and for her safety to be down the hall.

“Unbeknownst to me,” she continued while Harry was lost in thought. “I only found out after. But I did try explaining to Harry several times that it makes more sense for me to spend some time away from him, so he doesn’t tire of me.”

Sarah and Mitch exchanged a knowing look and Mitch shook his head at her. “Oh, love, I don’t think Harry’s ever going to tire of you,” Mitch promised.

Harry was silent during their little exchange other than interrupting to defend his loss against Niall. He rolled his eyes at the wonderful girl he adored so much. His eyes stayed on his friends’ little babe. Listening to her worry about growing tired of her made his stomach knot sickly. He wouldn’t ever. He couldn’t. She was his favorite thing to wake up to in the morning and the last thing he loved to see before falling asleep. Getting to be in the same building as her and working with her was a godsend; he was so lucky to be near her so often.

If anything, Harry worried about suffocating her.

He looked up at her from the floor with a knowing little smile. His left dimple dented his cheek deeply, making her stomach flip with adoration for him. She needed to leave before she kissed him all over his pretty face. Looking like a lovesick idiot in front of his friends. People who expected her to protect their most precious angel without falling all over Harry for a few hours. “Well, just to be sure, I better get back to Niall. I’ll see you later,” she cooed.

“See you later,” Harry answered, voice oozing with love that made her knees feel weak. She didn’t have the heart to tell him she meant the baby.

Harry held the baby in his arms while she got another sippy cup cleaned and ready with more milk. The little one was supposed to be asleep or hopefully falling asleep any minute but seemed much too excited to play with Harry to even think about resting. Harry was bouncing him effortlessly, his arms looked delicious curled around the little one. Like he was meant to hold a baby; Harry had big strong muscles, but they looked so delicate and still protective around the small little bean. Her heart fluttered at the thought of how natural he looked.

“Mumma and Dadda will be very upset with us if you don’t go to sleep, cutie pie,” she said but the little one thought her voice was pretty. Harry found it pretty, too. He liked the way it sounded when she spoke to him. Not quite baby-talk, but not exactly how she spoke to Harry either. “They might not ever let me play with you again if we keep you up all night,” she caressed the back of his soft little baby head, the hair feathery and light, like a bird’s wing. She was in love.

Harry smirked and kissed his little forehead. “Y’got t’sleep, lad.” She took the bottle from the microwave and handed it to Harry. The little one pushed it from Harry’s hand, so it fell to the floor. At the same time, the baby reached for the sweet girl. “I know she’s pretty; I don’t want t’sleep either when she’s around,” Harry murmured. He bent to get the bottle. “But y’can’t play with her when you’re tired either,” Harry explained. Her face was warm at Harry’s description, and she snuggled the cutie up to her chest. Harry placed the bottle between his lips and his little eyes seemed to close almost instantly. “Jus’ wanted a cuddle from y’kitten, before falling asleep. Can’t say I blame him.”

She smiled and brushed her fingers across his velvety soft cheek. “He’s so cute,” she whispered. Swaying as she held him in her arms.

Harry figured they would eventually talk about kids. He wasn’t sure when exactly, but it would happen. Harry definitely didn’t think it was going to be on a Tuesday evening when she had only just moved her final belongings in two weeks prior.

Yet all he could think about was her gorgeous being glowing with a rounded tummy. He wanted it. Bad. The idea suddenly consumed him. Wanting everything that would go along with it.He wanted every one of her possible mood swings. Every morning of nausea. All the cravings she could have. He wanted everything with her and a baby that would be a perfect meld of her and himself. She could feel Harry’s mind spinning in thought. She could see it in his face. But she had no idea that Harry was imagining a gaggle of little babies following the beautiful girl around their home. Snuggling on the porch furniture while she read to them and gave them lemonade. Or playing hide and seek around the yard. He wanted her pregnant right now. “What’s on your mind, Mr. Styles?” She hummed, interrupting his thoughts.

“Promise y’won’t…get nervous or worry?” He asked. He sounded nervous. For god’s sake he never even thought about asking her about kids in over the year she knew him. How was he supposed to just spring this on her right now? She was young. She had so much time to think about kids. She didn’t need to rush. But she looked so goddamn pretty with a baby in her arms Harry couldn’t help but think she’d be even more beautiful if the baby was her own.

She looked up at him with a smirk. “Sounds worrisome,” she answered knowingly. Harry rolled his eyes.

“I…I think y’would look really pretty if y’were pregnant, love,” his voice was so quiet. Softer than a whisper. He loved the flush of her cheeks and how she seemed to drop her nose to the little one’s head so she could almost hide in his wispy hair. Her shyness was adorable. It was entirely too early to have this conversation. They’d only officially been dating for less than three months. But they also lived together. And worked together. He was crossing his fingers and hoping the earliness or suddenness didn’t matter.

“Yeah?” She responded. No clear emotion about his idea either way.

“Yeah,” he nodded in affirmation.

It wasn’t often she thought about her six-year age gap with Harry. Almost everyone permanent in her life had five or so years on her. Before everything, before she knew how the world worked, she dreamed of being married and having kids by her mid-twenties. After everything, the last six years of hardship…it was a laughable thought.

But Harry was six years older. He probably thought about having kids a lot more now than she did. Of course, she loved kids. Of course, she wanted them. She had no idea Harry wanted them too. Suddenly, she was fourteen again. Just finished reading a young adult romance novel that had her dying for an all-consuming love like the one she read about. One that made her want to be married and have kids by the time she was 25.

And she could. Harry wanted to give her everything. Harry would give her everything she ever wanted. He was able to make everything better. She could have that crazy pipe dream with him that she imagined when she was in junior high.

“I think I’d like that too,” she admitted.

The relief on his face was utterly adorable. She didn’t know what to add to her statement. “Oh, thank God,” Harry mumbled.

She giggled trying not to jostle the baby. Harry ushered her to his room where he created a little makeshift sleeping pallet on his bed for the little one using a pillowcase and blanket. A little raft on the sea of Harry’s duvet. Once the baby was down Harry wrapped her in his arms. Attaching his mouth to hers and backing them out of the room towards what used to be “her” room but was now just a guest room.

“Oh, are we starting now? I think we should wait maybe a little bit, no? At least until Sarah and Mitch come back for their child? Or you know maybe we should actually date for a year?” She asked against his lips with a cheeky smile and giggle.

“Practice makes perfect,” he murmured back and pushed until she was laid on the bed.

“Baby,” she paused his delicious kisses. It was hard. She had to keep a tight rein of control on her mind to do so.

“Hmm?” He kissed the length of her neck, following an imaginary path to the hollow of her throat, and began skimming across her collarbone.

“I love you,” she whispered.

“Kitten, I love you so much.”

general taglist: @justlemmeadoreyou @daydreamingofmatilda @sunshinemoonsposts @youdontcaredoyou

Tradtional taglist: @tpwkstiles @matildasatellite @jessitpwk @jerseygirlinca @stylesfever @tiredinwinter @ameerakane20 @kimmi-kat @avasversion @youcouldstartacult @likeapplejuicenpeach @manrocket-mo @novalunosisting @golden-hoax @harryssky1 @michellekstyles @soachibstel1 @morklee02 @loving-hazz @harrysflorencex @cherrycolas-things @emma34501 @wish-upon-a-star-1310 @foreverxholland @daphnesutton @narry-heart @pandeebearstyles @acesofspadess

I'm sorry if I missed anyone in the taglist. Please let me know if you'd like to join, if it didn't work, if you no longer want to be included, etc. :)

If you like this, check out my masterlist for more of my writing.

#harry #harry styles writing #harry styles fluff #harry styles blurb #harry styles blurbs #harry styles smut #harry styles angst #harry styles imagine #harry styles imagines #harry styles fic #harry styles fanfiction #ceo!harry #sugardaddy!harry #harry styles x y/n #harry styles x reader #one direction #one direction writing #traditional

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thetriplets3 · 7 months

Note

whispering to each other + searching for the other’s hand in bed like theyre both tired but cant fall asleep (matt or chris x y/n or smt)

❝𝐢’𝐦 𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐰❞

pairing: matt x reader (no defined relationship but mutual pining?)

warnings: brief mention of anxious thoughts, loneliness, depression, vague mention of suicidal wishes

a/n special thanks to @dwntwn-strnlo for editing this you’re the best and shoutout to whoever it was to color code dialogue i took that idea anyways enjoy 🍿

having my 3 best friends away on tour was hard enough but having a rough few weeks physically and mentally on top of that was really hard on me. since i've moved here i haven't really made any friends. parties, events, and crowded loud places aren't my thing which makes it hard to meet people. sure i've met people the odd time the boys dragged me out but i was never able to hold a conversation let alone willingly go up to people. which brings me to now.

the triplets asked if i wanted to come on tour with them but i was in the middle of the semester, the busiest time. so i've spent the past few weeks alone, only leaving when i had to work. it sucks having no one to be able to go do things with, to talk to, and to just be there.

mindlessly clicking through the stories of people i follow, just trying to distract myself from my own thoughts, my screen reveals the faces of the only people i wish i were with right now. my heart aches watching them have the time of their lives being able to explore places they always dreamed of and getting to show their personalities on stage. don't get me wrong i'm beyond happy for them and how successful they’ve become the last few years, but i just wish i were with them. quickly hearting matt’s story of him posing in front of the bean in chicago, i drop my phone beside me and get under my covers, curling up. he seemed so happy being on tour.

i lie there, thoughts wandering, and tears gently flowing as i realize how truly alone i am. my thoughts are disrupted when i feel my bed softly vibrate. lazily rolling over, i grab my phone only to be met with a text from the person i yearned for the most. matt.

heyyy look who’s alive!

where’ve ya been it’s been a while since any of us heard from you?

you doing okay?

unfortunately i've been busy, midterm term time sorry edited

i’m fine

looks like tour’s fun, you look happy

unfortunately? please take time for yourself too you can only do so much if you’re not at your best

you’ll do great on them don’t overwork yourself love

it’s a blast seeing new places, meeting new people, i just wish you were here

shoot i forgot you can see what the other person edited

i was kidding. i’ll try

i wish i was there i miss you but it makes me happy seeing you be successful

we’ll be home before you know it i miss you too

and with that i turn my phone off for the night and bury myself under my covers in a desperate attempt to shut my brain off from thinking things it shouldn't. as the hours passed i tossed more and more not able to fall asleep, stay asleep and get comfortable. peeking at my clock to see the glowing 6:44am, i roll over shoving my face into my pillow and let out an unnecessarily loud groan. seeing no point staying in bed just to not be able to sleep i pad my way to the living room, claiming it my spot for the day. i put on a random season of the office to fill the silence and loneliness that i've sadly become used to. having seen the office far too many times, it's become a comfort background show, making it easy for me to fall asleep.

i accidentally ordered a package to your house from the last time you used my amazon prime to order something. it says it’s been delivered could you just put it aside for me? have a good day

staring at my phone i reread matt's text a few times, my mind still fuzzy and confused thanks to my lack of sleep. finally understanding it after the 5th time, i wrap my blanket around my body and trudge over to the door to pick it up. opening the door and checking the ground for a package i'm met with beat up air forces instead. startled, my head whips just to confirm it's who i thought it was.

matt.

all the loneliness, emptiness, sadness, yearning to see you hit me at once, a wave of tears overcame me as i engulf you in a hug nearly sending you and i to the floor. no words have been spoken, there's no need to. i immediately bury my head into your chest, your one hand coming to cradle my head as the other holds me securely to your body. we stay like this for a few minutes before you slightly pull away grabbing my hands and placing them around your neck, sneaking a quick peck to my cheek as you do so. your hands snake around my waist and gently lift me, bringing both of us into my house. closing the front door we make our way to the living room sitting on the couch turning to face each other.

god i missed you. today was our last day of tour but we were gonna stay there and explore the city for a few days but i couldn’t wait any longer i needed to see you. i was worried about you and couldn't bare the thought of being away for another second.

i missed you more. things haven’t been right since you guys left

like what?

it feels stupid to say out loud but ive felt so alone. like i have no one other than you guys and that makes me feel so pathetic that i rely on you guys so much. i haven't been able to sleep that much my mind just won't shut up i kept thinking about you guys and worrying about something bad happening to you it's stupid i know. heavily sighing i roughly wipe my face drying the tears that i tried so desperately to not let fall.

hey what did we talk about? every thought and feeling is valid they’re not stupid don’t say that.

you stand and offer me your hand and lead me to my room where we crawl into bed. you pull me as close to you as you possibly can. my head on your chest with my arm loosely draped across your body, your cotton shirt carelessly balled up in my hand. your arms wrapped around my torso like your life depended on it. god i missed this

i’m here now okay? everything’s okay, i’m okay, my brothers are okay, nothing happened to us. we’re not going anywhere for a while and when we do your coming with us. and don’t try and say you won’t be able to because of school, you’re coming no matter what. i can’t go that long without you, nothings the same

i won’t put up a fight i don’t want to do this again this was horrible being alone for so long. i missed being in your arms, feeling like nothing bad will ever happen because i have you here

as you place a gentle kiss to the top of my head a comfortable silence falls over us and we bask in this moment of being in each others arms again. my eyes grow heavy but my body is still fighting sleep like it has for the past few weeks

you can sleep now i’m here i’m not going anywhere i promise. i love you so much sweet girl

with the hushed tone of your voice and gentle pecks on my forehead, i feel my body grow heavier with sleep. i blindly reach my hand around searching for yours which you seem to pick up on what i wanted, placing your hand on mine and give it a squeeze once and a while letting me know you're right there.

goodnight sweet girl. i’m right here

taglist: @antisocialties @iluvmatt @dwntwn-strnlo @fake-coolbeans @opheliaofficial07 @angelcake-222 @oneirophobic @strniolo @lollibumblebee @ssturniolo @20nugs

(i can’t remember who it was but i saw someone color coded the dialogue and that makes it so much easier to read so shoutout to you if it was you)

#matt sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #matt sturniolo x reader #readers pov

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mo0nfairy · 1 year

Note

I gotta see a part of yandere Leon where reader remembers him as they get through los Iluminados maybe some yandere in action lol (at least only if you want to!)

part 1. part 3. part 4.

tw :: obsessive!leon, yandere!leon, mention of drugs, framing, handcuffs, stalking, trauma, guns, wounds, heights, being locked up.

⸺ ooooooo !!! i've been meaning to make a part 2 of my last ask, but had zero idea where to go from where i ended. i also had played a bit of RE2 before the remake came out recently, so a piece of my brain has been kept up in raccoon city for a little while. i would love to express my thoughts and mesh these two games together !!

let's start with where we left off in los iluminados.

upon having your handcuffs taken off by the stranger who is far too close for comfort, you pace backwards, far away as you can get from this insanity of a man. his attitude abruptly shifts into something softer, a major contrast to the emotional breakdown he had just seconds prior. he realizes you're afraid — afraid of him. and as much as the mere thought destroys him to the point of breaking down again, he shoves a sob back down his throat and keeps his distance, despite how desperately he wishes to close it.

6 years. 6 years. he has been waiting over 2,190 miserable days for this single moment. all the sleepless nights spent searching the world for you; all the hopeless nights spent clinging to pillows, praying by some miracle it will somehow become you. every second of these past 6 years has been spent dreaming of this single moment. and even though your reunion wasn't the teary-eyed, passionate kiss in the rain he had hoped for, you are still here with him nonetheless.

and like hell will he let you slip from his grasp again.

with as much time as his needy self would grant him being physically away from you, he is soon at your side. leon then wraps you in his jacket and you swear you hear a harsh gasp escape from him when his finger accidentally makes contact with the skin of your neck. despite your negligence and more-than-obvious discomfort, you do appreciate the new warm embrace after a week of cold rain and damp clothes. it smells exactly like him, as well.

and with that, he's got a gentle hand hovering over your lower back as he guides you through the depths of this hellhole. and piece by piece, memories that had been buried in your brain begin to disinter themselves.

for example, you got a staring problem bro?? for the entirety of the time you spend with leon in los iluminados, there is literally never a single moment where this mans eyes are not on you. half of the time it is to ensure you are unharmed, but the other half consists of him staring in complete and utter awe. it's kind of hard to focus on surviving when leon is constantly staring into your soul. but it has just been so fucking long since he has been able to see you in all of your glory, so please excuse him for any inappropriate behavior on his end.

also, you knew you have lived in raccoon city for a short period of time before the events of RE2 happened, but like everything else that relates to that damned place, you couldn't remember a thing.

except now. leon's gaze uncovers a memory you have of yourself being held in one of the RPD holding cells. the atrocious scent, the uncomfortable bench, the paint peeling from the walls. you try and scrutinize what on earth you could have been arrested for, but your attempts are merely futile. but unbeknownst to you, your arrest was nothing but bullshit. and to say leon has had a crush on you from the second you moved into RC would be nothing short of the truth. so, by pulling some strings, the rookie had managed to lock you up for what he calls 'bonding time'. he'll place a chair backwards in front of your cell, prop his arms on the backrest and admire you with your full attention finally on him (instead of just stalking you around town).

two things you now remember about this man: he was so adorably baby-faced back then and my god, was he awkward. he still cannot talk for shit and i mean this with my whole heart. his sweet, innocent eyes gaze at you while he tries to play it cool, pulling cards like "yeah, i workout" and "you come here often?". all as if he hadn't personally arrested you for possession of illegal substances he planted himself. (nothing will happen to you, obvi. he just desperately needed a second alone with you to show off how charismatic he can be. or try to be, at least).

and for the short second of seeing him after 6 years, his eyes were just devoid of any life. you had assumed the trauma inflicted from that night had caused such a contrast in his physical appearance, and you would be right to assume that. but the soulless eyes, monotone voice, and lackluster personality was entirely due to your disappearance. days upon days of the lonely, eternal torment destroyed his sanity. however, that illustrious boy you can barely remember seems to have returned with your presence.

another thing you can't believe you had forgotten was how intense his stare is. the way he stares is illegible and sometimes overwhelming. he shivers in his stance, whimpers at your every move, and his mind runs rampant with all sorts of obsessive declarations of love. although it may seem creepy to others and especially yourself, do not fret. he has no ill intent towards you, god he could never! this puppy-dog of a man is simply marveling at your sheer existence.

you are able to retrieve another lost memory when you have to jump from a window and into his arms (for those who say he won't be able to catch you, stfu. have ya'll seen how beefy his arms are??? anyways....). the secret agent you have grown to like during your stay in los iluminados jumps down marvelously (most def showing off his james-bond-esque agilities to you). he now watches from below as you stare at the distance beneath you in trepidation. this distrust you have — he is going to travel to the ends of the universe to fix it. no matter what.

you begin to ponder, he has savagely brutalized all threats in your path and held your hand as if he were holding the world all in the same breath. you should trust him, especially after witnessing the pure display of loyalty he has for you.

"don't be afraid, y/n. i'll catch you, i promise!" there is 10000% a way to walk through the house and down the stairs to get to him, but ofc he's not gonna tell you. why would he willingly throw away the opportunity to be your knight in shining armor?

"you will?" your voice is full of apprehension. his stare on you feels like the same bullets he's forced upon your attackers.

"always."

with that, you rip the bandaid off and jump from the ledge. and leon was most certainly not lying. you land safely in his embrace and he wraps his arms tightly around your form. and to finally have you so close, after so, so long of devastatingly praying he could feel you once more.......... if he had a tail, it would for sure be wagging so fast it would morph into a blur. and the way he holds you is different, as if his gentle nature is reserved for you and you only (which it is. this is literally him in a nutshell).

and when you had instinctively buried your face into his neck upon landing, clinging to him out of fear of hitting the ground, he literally melts. i'm serious, he literally just 🫠🫠🫠🫠. the faint hum of laughter and adoration that escapes his throat breaks you out of your state of shock. you made it safely to the ground without breaking every bone in your body, hooray! (as if there is a single reality in existence where leon would ever allow that to happen, but i digress).

you meet his gaze and there is that all-too familiar stare he gives you. leon's arms holding onto you like a lifeline uncovers a memory you have of yourself being held like this all those years ago. you can't recall exactly where in raccoon city you were, but you can remember how humiliated you were when you tripped over a crack in the pavement and ate shit. there was the fairest of scrapes against your shin, but the mortification hurt far more than any wound. while you dust yourself off and attempt to ignore the burning stares of pedestrians, a shout of your name sparks your attention.

the RPD gear and besotted eyes you're met with could be no other than that baby-faced rookie. you ponder of what he was doing on this side of town. was it a simple coincidence you had run into each other? or perhaps, had he followed you? just when you think you can't feel more embarrassed, leon gets down on one knee and dramatically inspects your wound. and my god, he acts like you were shot or something. he visibly shudders from the sight of your leg; people begin to gather around the commotion. with pure ease, he then scoops you into his arms to bring you to safety. you can feel his heart pound like a machine gun beneath the palm of your hand.

despite the humiliation deprived from this event, you fortunately are free from anything mortifying in los iluminados. however, leon doesn't seem to understand when to take a hint.

"uh... you can put me down now." you come out of your memory to thrash in his grasp and avoid his intense gaze, but your prince charming seems to still be caught in his y/n-filled daze.

after a few long seconds, your comment seems to finally reach his brain. "huh?" his response is faint and you almost don't hear it.

you repeat yourself and begrudgingly, leon then slowly puts you back onto your feet, savoring the last few seconds spent with you in his arms. exactly where you belong. you can only fear how much more suffocating affection you'll have to endure before you can finally remember what happened that night.

i think someone legit needs to slap me across the face and bring me back into reality cause holy shit...... i went WAYY too far with this. my brain is a mess thank u for reading.

i have more thoughts about this........ just incase u were curious........ ;)

#resident evil 4 #re4 #re4 remake #resident evil #leon kennedy #leon kennedy x reader #leon kennedy imagine #yandere leon kennedy #yandere resident evil #yandere #gn reader #gender neutral reader #venus’ brain #moonfairy

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