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atyourmerci · 2 months

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⌘ enough for now ⌘

⌘ ⌘

Summary: You’re left in the WLF interrogation room to be punished when you meet your attacker, the girl you can’t stand and one of her groupies.

Warnings: smut, MDNI, !!VERY DARK MATERIAL!! Talks of death/dying & pain but nothing inflicted, dark!abby, dom!abby, sub!reader, slight dubcon but there is verbal consent given, reader is a cuck (i don’t wanna hear it), knife play, spanking, degradation, praise, bondage, fingering, strap (not used on reader), no use of y/n, no physical description of reader, plot twist?? Idk either

A/N: soooo…hey. This has been sittin for a minute in the drafts. This is actually the first abby fic I ever wrote and I thought it might be a little much. Everyone can thank @littlegingerperson5 bc she encouraged me to share<333 I just want to give one more warning, this fic IS NOT FOR EVERYONE! it’s quite dark esp in the beginning. Just protect your peace and enter if you dare. Okay I love ya, enjoy this utter disgrace of literature.

⌘

Your eyes flutter open to a dark room, your head is pounding, body weak. The only thing you can make out was the ceiling lamp hanging over an old wooden desk. You attempt to touch the drip on your forehead when you realize your arms are bound to ropes hoisted from above you. You pull on the scratchy ropes to no avail, your body was too weak to fight.

You groan at the pain growing in your arms, there’s no telling how long you had been here for, days, hours, weeks maybe. As your memory starts to flood back in, the prison had not been as foreign as when you once woke. This was the WLF interrogation room. Most people never made it out of it alive, but you still couldn’t come to understand why they had brought you here, you were apart of them.

A guttural scream escapes you once more, the newfound motion caused your head wound to trail blood down your cheek. Before you can make your second attempt at freeing yourself there’s a rustling at the door, you watch as two figures make their way in, one much larger than the other. You blink repeatedly as they make their way closer, still foggy from previous impact.

When the figures make their way to the lit desk you make out your captures, Abby Anderson and Jill Meyers, one of the many girls that threw themselves onto Abigail at any chance she might fuck them. You had never returned the same sentiment, you despised her, she was arrogant, selfish, and got anything she wanted from women or the WLF. She hated you just as much, probably since you refused to beg for her to simply give you the honor of touching you.

“Abby what the fuck is this,” you bark with gritted teeth. Abby stands smugly with her large biceps crossed, smirking at your position, “awhh did you think you’d just get off the hook for running off on mission like that,” Jill snickers at Abby’s snarky remark. Your memories start rolling back before you can respond. “I just got lucky enough having the honor to… fix your behavior,” Abby says almost pouting, digging into you.

You can’t understand what to be angrier about, the fact that the WLF sent Abby here to reprimand you or that fact that she brought the little bitch Jill with her. Your face turns to Jill that plays with her long brunette hair, twirling it around her fingers, inching her crotch into Abby’s thigh like a gloried toddler with tits. “What’s the need for your slut of the night? Cant trust you wont touch me before you kill me?” You jab at Jill but remain in eye contact with Abby with every word.

“Watch it bitch! Jus’ mad she doesn’t want you,” Jill says grabbing onto Abby’s arm, bulging with veins as she begins heating up. “Don’t worry Jill she’s all yours…and every other girl in the next 15 mile radius,” you say with a light giggle. Abby never takes her eyes from you, her breath growing heavier with anger, “will you shut the fuck up already,” Abby barks.

With no denial of your statement Jill hits Abby’s arm with a scoff, “can we just kill her now, take me back to your room, I need you abs,” Jill cocks into lust as if I wasn’t listening, I guess it didn’t matter if I wouldn’t live to tell the story. Abby’s eyes remaining on your beaten body, covered in only ratty panties and a cut up tank top that barely covered your midriff. Her eyes clung to you, making her way up and down your revealed body with her eyes making you shutter. You were always attracted to the brute woman but shoved it far back into your mind once she opened her fucking mouth.

“Get on the table,” Abby demands not moving an inch. “What?” Jill says confused, probably unsure of who Abby is even talking to since her eyes remain on you but sensing you are bound at the wrist... could she have at least brought a whore with at a few brain cells to torture you. “Get on the fucking table Jill,” her eyes finally fall to Jill, picking her up with ease and throwing her on the old wooden desk, Jill gasps at the suddenness.

Within seconds Abby rips down Jill’s pants and panties in one foul swoop, then trails her hands up to her blouse to bring it up above her breast. Jill taken aback from Abby’s manhandling throws her head back in pleasure, moaning out and gripping into the blonde’s head. Abby advances her open mouth onto the girls’ cunt, lapping her tongue at her slit. “God, are you fucking serious!” You say in disgust, ignoring the way your thoughts roam to how good she looked taking control of Jills body effortlessly.

Abby grins up at you, tongue still deep into Jill, she lets out a huff of satisfaction. Jill was so pleased she gave no attention to how Abby glared at your body as she ate her out. She was enjoying this, watching your arms aimlessly tug at your restraints while Jill was sprawled out whorishly for her use.

You couldn’t help the aching pain that now grew in between your legs, begging for attention. Abby moves her head up from the girl’s cunt into a standing position and begins drilling her pointer and ring finger into her sopping folds. She looks up into your eyes, head slightly cocked upwards, slick wet on her chin with parted lips. A reluctant whimper escapes your mouth at her gaze. Your response causes Abby to grip her free hand onto the edge of the desk, licking her lips pleased.

Your body becomes restless, squirming around in your restraints, you bite into your bottom lip for some type of release. “God you’re such a whore,” Abby directs to you with a smug look, Jill moans out in the assumption its for her since the blonde continued to beat into her cunt. Another moan escapes from your mouth at her words, muffled enough by Jills screams.

Abby suddenly shifts her direction and rips her fingers out of Jill, instantly shoving them into the girl’s mouth. Once Jill had sucked the slick from Abby’s thick fingers, she trailed her fingers to her belt unbuckling it herself. “Get on your knees,” She demands, which Jill eagerly agrees to dropping herself onto the floor.

Abby unsheathes her long black strap, veins trailing up it, the sight causes you to gawk. Abby takes notice of your gaping mouth and shoots you a pleased smirk while grappling the brunette’s hair roughly, shoving her cock into her mouth suddenly.

The ache growing in your pussy begs for release, you grip them tightly to create friction that sends your head back in pleasure, whimpers flowing out of your needy throat. A trail of slick begins trailing down your dirty thighs. “Not even touching you and your cunt’s that wet, s’fucking pathetic,” she says huskily. Your eyes are directed back to her, watching her biceps flex in Jill’s hair as she fucks into her mouth. You hear Jill begin to gag on Abby’s length as she relentless drills into her, like nothing would be enough to fulfill her needs. “Abby-“Jill muffles out in chokes in attempt to regain her attention.

Whimpers continue to spew out as you eagerly rub your thighs needing her touch. “Needy little slut, aren’t you?” Abby growls at you, ignoring Jills gags. “Abby, it hurts!” Jill blurts out ultimately regaining breath. Abby finally directs her attention down to the fucked-out brunette, “what is your fucking problem?” Abby says gripping her neck with her strong hand, now hovering over her. “C-can you just fuck me,” Jill says meekly under her grasp.

“You’re pissing me off, go back to the room ill deal with you later,” she unleashes her grasp on Jill. She scoffs at Abby’s dismissal as she pulls up her pants, throwing her blouse back on in an exaggerated sigh and huffing her way out like a spoiled brat. Abby had treated her like shit, but your pussy begged for her sole attention.

As the door slams shut Abby makes her way to your hanging body, cunt throbbing with slick. She begins circling around you slowly, “and what am I going to do with you huh?” she parks her body in front of you, inches away from your sweaty face. “Pathetic little girl, dripping down your thighs watching me fuck Jill,” her breath so close causes the hair on your body to spike.

Without warning she lays a slap onto your pulsing cunt that makes you yelp. She rubs your clothed pussy before laying another smack onto it, this time causing a pleasurable moan to discharge. “Abby please-” you beg her with weary eyes. “No… you don’t get to rush this,” she says with no remorse.

Her eyes are dark. Pitch fucking black. Like something had taken over her that you’ve never seen. Sure, you’ve seen her kill people with her bare hands, ripping people open at the tips of her fingers, but she had never seemed this menacing, this deranged. You looked like her next victim, and maybe you were ready for that, as long as she showed you a blissful summit before tearing your throat out.

She begins to pace around you again, slower, inching her eyes up your body, completely at her disposal. Trailing her fingertips gently down like she was deciding where she wanted you first, where she could inflict pain first that would keep you alive long enough for her full amusement. If you died too quickly that wouldn’t be fun for her, would it?

“wh-what are you going to do to me,” you barely mutter out as she’s behind you. You can’t see her, but you feel her gaze, the heat of her piercing into your skin without the need to even feel her. She doesn’t respond at first, enjoying the sight of you squirming under her touch-less gaze. The only noise in the room was the enthralled whimpers that couldn’t seem to be held back- until it was penetrated by the merciless breathy laugh from your capture.

You froze when that breathe was so close to the shell of your ear that it sent goosebumps flying down your figure, “I just want to play with you.” You bite your lip to hold back any reaction, but it couldn’t stop the subconscious tightening of your thighs in search of release.

And she saw it.

She began agonizingly dragging her calloused fingers up the tops of your thighs, inching towards your clothed core, still breathing deeply in your ear. Your legs were shaking restlessly, growing tired of pressing so harshly. “That’s what you want, hmm?” she taunts, as her fingers roam, catching the hem of your panties but never allowing you the satisfaction of pleasure.

“You want to get played with, like a toy? That’s what you want.” She answers the question for you, as you didn’t give her any sense of a verbal response.

“You don’t play nice with others,” bitchy response, but you were hoping she’d get on with punishing you for it. Any touch would be better than this, the lack of her. Her large hand darts to your core, handling you in her grasp, the suddenness mixed with the intensity sent your body flying back into her chest as she stabilized your body with her free hand gripped onto your breast, her fingers pinching at your hardened bud. She was so fucking close now, the heat of her transferring into your skin.

“Never said I did.” Her breath had increased in speed, just as affected by having you in this way. There were no words that could formulate as you both heaved, your body subconsciously grinding into her hand as a groan rang in your ear, finally allowing herself to inform you how badly she needed this, needed you, even if she didn’t want to admit it.

After aimlessly grinding into her hand, she finally began to pulse the edge of her palm start into your swollen clit, eliciting a guttural moan from your throat. As your moans quickened, her speed did as well. She pushed her body further into you, like she needed to be as close as she could get.

“Do you want this?” she says in almost a whisper, barely heard over the desperation in your voice. Your eyes dart open with her sentiment, a branch, an exit door, a way out. You should say no, tell her to stop fucking with you and get it over with, put an end to your suffering.

“Y-yes,” blurts out, you didn’t command the response rather your body spoke for you.

Her hand rips out of its grip on your pulsing cunt that provokes a whine of neediness from you. You feel her reach from behind her, and a click of a switchblade unclasping from the safety of its cover.

Fuck.

The hand adorned to your red bud darts back down to your panties, she hooks her fingers under and pulls them up harshly as she uses her other hand to slice them clean off your body, falling to your feet on the cold floor. A relieved breath falls from your throat. Her free hand now meets the back of your neck to stabilize you so she can watch you from below her.

She begins dragging the sharp tip of the blade from the bottom of your lip down, achingly slow, any sudden movement risking the consequences of penetrating your skin. She gets to your navel when she realizes your stillness, your strategy to walk out of here with no other wounds that you possibly came in with.

She lets out a smug sigh at your determination while she circles your stomach with the tip, “tell me why I shouldn’t mark that pretty tummy right now.” Your breath hitches, eyes widening. “I-I,” you attempt to muster up any plea for your life to no avail. At your pathetic attempt she tightens her grip on your neck, bringing your ear closer to her lips, “give me one reason.”

All morals leave you, the distain you had for the brute woman vanishing in mere seconds. “You fucking won okay…y- you have me. Fuck me like you fuck your whores.”

Pathetic? Absolutely. But a lie? No. Your body craved her, it always had, your mind wouldn’t let you have her. That’s when the tip began its decent down to the top of your cunt, inching down so close you’d accepted that you would get off on the simple touch of the shiny dagger on your swollen clit.

Your body tensed as the tip was so close to your clit if you would’ve breathed too harshly you could’ve done it yourself when you she darted her dagger clad palm above your head, slicing down the ropes holding you hostage.

Your body came tumbling down, crashing weakly onto the cold cement. While she had cut you loose the ropes still bound you at the wrist. She picked your body up gently, strangely kind, as if she was not here enforcing your demise. She carefully walked you to the wooden table, placing you where Jill had been, minutes, hours? ago. Time had left your senses with the connection to the wound now blood-dried on your forehead.

Your legs subconsciously opened for her, bottoms of your feet placed down on the cracked wood. She hovered over you, bringing her hands to either side of your face, closing in on you. For a moment she just watched you, a glimmer of almost curiosity in her eyes as you watched her.

Neither of you spoke, she was the one calling the shots but she just…looked at you, watched as you waited for her command, but it never came. She was frozen over your gaze.

“Kiss me.” You command her. It was a shot in the dark, a wild assumption, but you had to try.

A puzzled look contorts her face, “what?” It landed. She never kissed Jill, and definitely not you. She could kill, she could fuck, but she couldn’t handle the sense of connectedness, vulnerability.

“You know what I said,” you were getting head strong at this point, but you had already cracked her, the true light pooling over you wordlessly. “No.” She says in a breathy scoff, still unmoving from her stance, still frozen from after she placed you.

It was only long shot but your body made it for you, using the strength your elbows still had to hoist yourself up, so close to her face you could feel her breath falter above you. Her eyes trailing between your eyes and lips. “Kiss me.” You repeat yourself.

In seconds her walls break around her as her lips meet yours, hungry, unsatisfied, as if she never allowed herself the pleasure of true intimacy. One of her hands came up to cup your cheek as the other met the small of your back to support you while your arms are still bound at the wrist, in between your thighs uselessly.

Her hands only stray for a second to release your aching wrist, but her lips never left yours, she let herself have it, and now she couldn’t get enough. She would have Swallowed you whole if you would have let her.

As you were sat at the edge of the table, both of her hands met your back, pulling you as close as she could get to you. Your hands were finally able to touch the warmth of her, the scars that littered her skin, the lines and definition of her arms, the veins in her hands. You allowed yourself to roam every inch of her, while you gave her the time to indulge your mouth.

Her hand snaked from your back to your still throbbing core, only intensified by the withheld touch of her. When her calloused fingers met your clit for the first time your mouth gaped at the sensation of relief. Allowing her tongue to enter as you moaned out for her.

She couldn’t pace herself, rubbing quick circles around your puffy clit, your whimpers causing moans to slip out of her own mouth and into yours. Your legs were already shaking, nearing an early climax.

She brought you to the edge without letting you finish, moving her fingers down your slit, gliding easily with the pent up slick she had coaxed out of you. “Abby please-“

Her mouth still agape she begin to toy with your fluttering hole, “not yet,” she heaves out. She plunged her ring and middle finger deep inside you, groaning at the feeling of you pulsing around her.

“Fuck!” You scream out, latching onto her broad shoulders to stabilize yourself. “I know…I know,” she coos.

While her kisses came gently…her fingers did not. She drove them as deep as she could, making sure the palm of her hand left pressure on the swelling of your clit. Your body was giving out, you tried hold yourself up by digging your nails into her shoulders but in the state you were in, it wasn’t going to last much longer.

As your hands begun to waver, losing grip she lowered your back onto the table, never leaving your lips as she continued to stretch you out. You were finally ready to let go, give up complete control to your capture.

“A-abby I’m c-close I don’t-“ you began to breath out when she stops your pathetic attempts to warn her. “It’s okay pretty, cum on my fingers.”

Her words forced you to the edge, shaking under her while she watched you. As you rode out the bliss of your climax she continued to coax you through it with ‘there you go’ and ‘doing so good for me’. You were completely under her spell.

When she finally slowed the pace of her fingers, you lied there trying to regain your breath. Your body was completely spent, bruised, abused in more ways than one. You stared at her doe-eyed in adoration to your attacker. “Can I-“ you began to speak, seeking out the chance to return the sentiment, let her feel the same bliss she granted you.

She shook her head with finality. “That’s enough for now.”

Taglist: Taglist: @wishbones999 @bookpagecandlescent @littlegingerperson5 @lookforthelight1 @fict1onallyobsessed @littlemisslexapro55555

#abby anderson #the last of us #abby anderson smut #abby x reader #abby anderson tlou2 #abby angst #abby the last of us #abby tlou #sub abby #abby anderson fanfic #abby anderson x reader #dom abby anderson

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austinsastrology8991 · 10 months

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> Ascendant Aspects < How you Appear to be, and how your treated based off your appearances > why you look like a clown without makeup

Ascendant aspecting Sun - I like your smile. Did you put it on for me, or for yourself? yes your charismatic, yes we noticed why your so confident, yes your literally the greatest person do you really need us to shower you in affection all the fkn time? your extra but too many toppings ruin a good pizza. your the embodiment of the cheesy smile from that cat in alice in wonderland. main character energy for sure you get the attention and you know how to use it Ascendant Aspecting moon - 🌚 < dont they look like that.? idk but you guys look like someone you want to grab the cheeks of and treat like a baby, your like a sugar glider. but we know your emotional so we have to be careful with how we grab your cheeks 👀 please stop crying its just a joke > also; big ass eyes. you are so sweet that everyone just wants to take you home and feed you till you become so obese you cant leave Ascendant Aspecting Mercury - the most devilish and cheeky smile all at once. they look like a kid about to do something bad, or have just been caught doing something bad and are now trying to explain why they had to do that dumbassery. but no matter how much you explain yourself, we will still question you because its funny watching you come up with explanations. you give me the vibe of any character from cartoon network or nickledoen - timmy turner, southpark, phineas and ferb, ed edd and eddy, or fkn bart simpson, you act like a cartoon yes.

Ascendant Aspecting Venus - I dont normally do this but whats ur number? is what your used to hearing presumably. and its not necessarily because your attractive... okay you are, you can stop pouting now. but its because you know how to get attention and you clearly love getting it. but they act so superficial, and oblivious sometimes... like they purposrfully look away just so its easier for you to look at them, 💀 then they look back playfully and it gets you in the feels. remind me of doctor who's bitches (any of them) they all act the same idc what you say

Ascendant Aspecting Mars - so pissed off lol but its hot. they are fierce > if they want something they are going to get it, and even the mere consideration of negotiating what they want will just get them more mad. which makes them more attractive? idk people love their ferocity, and as much as people say they don't like aggressive types, they don't ever get in their way when they pissed off (ik because im hot head) your basically a hornet > and no one gonna fight a hornet without the proper precautions Ascendant aspecting Jupiter - Yall are excellent at impressions and being impressionable, idk how you do it so well. You just act normal but then pull off this funny shit and return back to normal like its nothing. you guys perfected just being, and this energy makes people want to be around you. Your like a firework, the explosion is awesome, but when it goes away your like damn that was awesome wish it stayed; but thats what makes it so good, because we never know when its coming, and when its gone we want it back lol Ascendant Aspecting Saturn - batman without the mask sucks. thats you. batman without the mask.... why so serious???? > "because life shouldnt be taking for granted and fuckery aint apart of my Repertoire" - is some whack ass shit yall would say. you have great dignity, but people get insecure around you because your on top of your shit. oh and you tell people to get on top of their shit all the fkn time lol. > your like a crow, you look like one and act like one. - Side note- one time i had a stand off with a crow: I was chilling at home and i was on top of these tile blocks, then this crow came along. I tried to scare him, by like staunching him just a bit. but he responded by gripping the tree branch he was perched on, by twisting his claw foot; and he did it with so much ferocity it made this bone cracking noise (from the strength of his grip gripping the tree) and suddenly i was intimated.... by a fkn crow. okay moving on

Ascendant Aspecting Uranus - how did you even become like that. no one really understands why you act the way you do, you do some really eccentric things which are eye grabbing but also disturbing the more you think about it. your like a sword fish. theres probably more effective ways to kill fish, but i mean a sword works, we are just wondering how you attached a sword to your face. also try to calm down, you doing so much and acting so bizarre that im actually more worried about you, even though im laughing my ass off. Ascendant Aspecting Neptune - your like a mirror of all that i ever could want in a person, and this mysterious allure you so easily pull off is truly enchanting. its like being around you makes it feel as if reality can so easily be readjusted into what i would like it to be. but this quality of urs is addicting, and no wonder people project onto you. but you cant even blame them, you literally shapeshift into whatever you want, and typically you like to show it off. your like a chameleon. or a axolotl Ascendant Aspecting Pluto - you scare people easily lol. your a spider. but spiders are sexy.... look at the BUNDA. okay but those teeth yeesh, have you ever seen a spider like lick its lips, bro its fkn scary. theres a reason arachnophobia is the most popular phobia and its because spiders are fucked. and yall are fucked. you move like a spider, and i swear to god you smile like one too lol. but people low key wanna be eaten by a spider..... so go ahead choose yo prey you fkn creepy crawler

#astrology #astrology blog #astro community #astrology notes #astrology observations #astrology placements #ascendant aspects #astrology aspects #astro observations

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lunaviee · 1 year

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can i request where reader cant go to their match and they got angry which makes them say the word "i shouldve invite *ex's name*, she wouldve come." and reader reaction can be up to you! with rin and maybe chigiri? thank you so much and please stay hydrate! sending loves <33

OHHH MYYY GODDD ANONNN……..

the way i gasped so loud when i saw this OMGOMG

okay so, idk if you’re wanting PURE ANGST for this but like i’ll add fluff at the end anyway bc the more the merrier😇😁😁

OKAY SO UMM..i’m a procrastinator, it’s no secret. so uhh chigiris will be posted when i remember to work on it, sorry😭

“are you serious?” “you’re..kidding, right?”

chigiri hyoma and rin itoshi x reader (seperate) click here for chigiri’s

tags/warnings: angst to comfort, swearing, arguing, NOT PROOFREAD…

synopsis: if he’s so insistent on you being there to support him, why doesn’t he do the same?

a/n: i am SO SORRY this took so long </3 i got busy but this request is soo..chefs kiss i hope i did it justice😓

RIN ITOSHI—

the faint mumbles from the tv filled rin’s apartment as you made a quick snack to eat, knowing your boyfriend should be home any minute. you sat down on the couch to eat, turning the tv volume up as background noise while you looked out the window. it faced a gorgeous view of your city, along with a nice view of the sunset.

after some time, you were back in the kitchen to clean up a bit.

*click*

the jingling of keys indicated rin was home, a tad later that usual but you payed no mind to it.

“hey,” you smiled, “welcome home, how was practice?” arms wrapping around his neck as he set his bag down, taking his shoes off. his arm snaked around your waist to pull you closer to him, planting a kiss on your temple.

“eh, same as always. those lukewarm lunatics don’t know what they’re doing”

you hummed in response, rin pulling away from you to look you in the eye. he spoke again. “we have a game in a few days. you’re going, right?” it sounded more like a demand than a question.

“oh uh about that” you broke eye contact, a twinge of nervousness tainted your face. “i was given an extra shift at work so i’ll be swamped, i don’t think i’ll be able to make it, sorry”

his before softened gaze now pierced right through you, full of annoyance. “really? i thought you’d want to come to my games.” his arms left your torso and flopped to his side, lower back resting on the counter.

“i do! i always do..rin you know this, i go to your games when i can but lately i’ve just been more busy an-” you rambled.

he cut you off, “quit the excuses.”

“excuse me?” you replied, shocked at how his silver tongue was so quick to interrupt you.

“i get it. you’re busy. you don’t have to make up these half-baked excuses and try to make me feel better.” he moved from the counter, straightening his back and showing his full height, looking down on you as if you were less than him at that moment.

“excuses? rin, what the hell are you talking about? i’m being serious.” confusion swirled in your mind, what was up with him??

“you know, i never had these problems with *ex’s name*. she was always happy to come to my games. no excuses, no lies. every game, she was there. why can’t you be like that?” rin’s venom stained words singed into your brain, glints of annoyance pooled in his eyes. a twinge of guilt settled in his gut the minute those words spilled out of his mouth, but he payed no mind to it.

“what?” your eyes widened in disbelief, “are you fucking serious?”

how could he say that? sure, rin was petty and used bitter language when he was upset, but comparing you to his ex? that was a new low, even for him. after all of the crap you two talked about when mentioning both of your exes in the past, you’d assume he’d want absolutely nothing to do with her. right?

“why wouldn’t i be?” not once did his gaze leave your figure, was he serious? “she actually took my career seriously.”

you were beyond shocked, eyes narrowing as your brows knitted together. “invite her then.” you retorted. “maybe i will, maybe then i’ll have someone who actually supports me there.” he scoffed.

his words made your blood boil, eye twitching before you spoke again, “get out.” you gritted through your teeth, fingers fiddling with the hem of your (his) sweater as to not lose your cool.

“what?” he scoffed, not expecting such a response (he really should have, what was he thinking??)

“did i fucking stutter? or is your skull too thick to hear what i have to say. get. out.”

the strikers face further scrunched, yet not moving an inch. “this is my apartment. if you’re upset, then leave.” he brushed past you without a single regret as to what he had said, not entirely believing you’d actually leave, where else did you have to go?

“fine then.” you slipped your shoes on while dialing a number on your phone before slamming the door, leaving the rin to sit with his thoughts. you had much, much more to say, but the thought of having to stay in the same vicinity as you made your stomach churn.

who did you call? why, your best friend of course, who else would you trust with this information. sure, rin’s teammates weren’t bad people to open up to, but you needed someone who could understand your feelings through angry sobs and incoherent mumbles.

it was only a matter of time before you were sat on yours friends bed, angry tears burning your cheeks as you rambled on about how dumb your boyfriend was.

“break up with him” your friend mumbled, only half joking. “me personally, i wouldn’t stay with a man, nah, a BOY who brings up his ex when he’s mad..”

you lifted your head from the tear stained pillow to meet your friend’s gaze. “yeah but……ugh i hate when you’re right” your sentence ending with a laugh

“i’m kidding..kind of” she sneered “either way, screw him, ghost his ass until he comes crying at your doorstep”

“what??” you shot up from your position, now almost on top of your friend. she was faced you, a more serious expression painting her face

“seriously though, you shouldn’t have to deal with that shit [n/n], he has the be the one to apologize.” you nodded in response, good thing your friend had a bit more common sense than you did in that moment.

“yeah, you’re right, thanks”

“any time, now do you wanna stay here or are you good to go home?”

“i’ll stay here and bug you more”

“okay then” she laughed out, the two of you now laying on the bed on your backs, staring at the ceiling

• { time skip - two days later } •

the radio silence that came from rin was like torture, did he not care? not a single text or phone call, not even a message given from one of his teammates. it was hard to stay positive.

sure, he deserved the silent treatment, but he was your boyfriend. his company single-handedly made your days better. being separated because of a fight that he didn’t want to resolve was stupid.

your friend tried taking you out today to get your mind off of the situation. it was going well, up until you walked into your favorite cafe.

you were met with a face you were too familiar with. rin’s. his eyes widened in disbelief and he twitched, almost as if he was about to run after you. and so you and your friend took one good look at him and immediately left. if the argument was going to be resolved, it wasn’t going to be in a public cafe.

your friend pushed you by the shoulders as you both shuffled out of the doors, you pulling out your phone to find another place to go to at the same time.

“shit.” was the only thing that rin had managed to mutter out as he saw the two of you running away from the cafe. it’s not that he wanted to avoid you. it’s that he was ashamed. he was scared that nothing he would say would amount to enough of an apology for what he said.

rin was scared that this was the end of you two. his worst fears of losing the one person he knew loved and understood him were coming true and is was his fault. the past few days were filled with doubt and regret, his teammates even noticing his practices were depleting.

the rest of the day came and went, your friend dropped you off back at your apartment where you collapsed on the couch, left with your thoughts once again. you were about to just pass out on your couch and ditch work the next morning, like you have been for the past few days.

that was until you heard a frantic knock on your door, jolting you awake. your worried expression dropped to one of annoyance and bitterness; it was rin. but, he looked different. his usually blank expression was now one of exhaustion and hurt.

he’d been..crying?

your eyes widened in confusion, you opened your mouth to tell him to leave before he cut you off.

“i’m sorry” he blurted out

he was looking down to you, except it was much different than before. rin looked desperate, his eye contact only further confirmed it.

he reached his hand out to place it on your shoulder, hesitating. you opened the door to let him in, sitting on the edge of your couch next to each other.

“i’m so sorry [name].”

“i know.”

“it was stupid, you mean so much to me and i..i ruined it.”

“i know.”

“please, you don’t need to forgive me now i just…”

he paused. rin’s head moved to look at the ground.

“i just need to know you won’t leave me. you can ignore me for as long as you’d like and i’d understand. but just…please i need you back” he begged, small tears brimming at his eyes, what a rare sight to see.

silence fell between the two of you, but it wasn’t like the comfortable silences you’ve shared before. it was tense and awkward.

“okay” your voice was barely above a whisper, “i won’t leave you, i think we both know that” you say with a smile.

rin looked back up at you, eyes wide, full of hope and relief.

“but listen i…” the moonlight only further highlighted just how much the two of you had been crying

“it’s gonna take some time. that was really fucked up, you know that?”

“yeah..yeah i know. i’m sorry. you’re nothing like her i-”

“i know.”

the two of you were now looking at each other, faces flushed from crying and relief. the silence was comfortable again.

“let’s just..go to sleep, yeah? we can talk about it in the morning, i think we both could discuss better afterwards” you offered, leaning closer to the armrest of your couch as you were too tired to go to your bed

rin hummed back in response, laying on your chest as he wrapped his arms around your waist. your hands found their way to his hair, heartbeats practically synchronizing.

“you know..i’m still not going to your game” you whispered, peeking one eye open to watch your boyfriend. he smiled, “i know” a laugh spilled out of his mouth before you both fell asleep.

#blue lock #blue lock x reader #bllk #bllk x reader #angst #comfort #rin itoshi #rin itoshi x reader #itoshi rin #itoshi rin x reader #rin x reader #bllk rin #✩ vie writes

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filmbyjy · 2 months

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hiii

you may not recognize me and thats because im (kinda) new hehe.. anyway, i've been kinda stalking you- but that's besides the point. i loveee your workss!! keep up the good work <3 idk if asks are open, but if they are, could you write a fluffy fem!reader x bf!niki where the reader comes home from a long day, and niki comforts her?? and if you cant, its totally ok <3

have a nice day!

a/n: this has been in the drafts for a year now💀 so sorry, I am trying to clear the drafts but my schedule is shit and we all know I suck at keeping up with my schedule😍

WELCOME HOME

it was past 8pm when you had treaded through the front door of your apartment. your body sore from leaning over the tables and wiping it. normally, the cafe you work at was peaceful and was decently packed but after a viral video that practically wowed the internet.

there had been more and more people stopping by everyday. the cafe was decently sized but it was short staffed so sometimes you had to man the cashier, do the dishes, clean the tables and make the drinks. for normal days (before the surge of people), there was about 2 people working per shift, not including the 2 bakers in the kitchen as they were the behind the scenes staff that were required to be there.

with not that many staff per shift, it was hard for you and whoever was working that day to manage the cafe. that also meant more demands from the customers who think they are entitled to make a mess of the space as 'customers are always right'. curse, whoever made that quote.

you were mentally and physically drained. you just needed a good long rest for the rest of the week. however, you couldn't do that. not when your off-days were already used up for visiting your family back in your hometown. if only you could just...take a breather.

"welcome home, baby!" ni-ki slides into the hallway just as you walked towards the living room. you gave him a tired smile.

"hi riki, why aren't you at the dorm?" ni-ki gives you a playful pout.

"already kicking me out? baby, you wound me. i came to see you and you're already pushing me away." he says as he throws his (long) arms around you. "you weren't answering my calls so i assumed it was a long day at work and you didn't charge your phone."

you took out your phone and tried to turn it on but it was indeed dead. "sorry, today was a hectic day. couldn't even get a proper lunch break. there was so many people coming over for the past week."

"yeah, i heard about it. jake hyung talked about wanting to come over and buy some desserts. they did look good but since you know us being celebrities...we could get mobbed."

you hummed, "that's fair. it's a good thing you didn't go. seriously, have never seen such a long queue outside of the cafe in my whole years of working there."

"there was a queue?" he says as he pulls back from the hug.

"yeah, i felt like i was working at some fancy restaurant. oh god, speaking of there are so many karens trying to scam me and gaslight me into thinking i did something wrong when i did nothing wrong." you groaned and buried your head against ni-ki's chest.

he pats your head. "were you the shift manager?"

"usually i am whenever i am working that day."

"mmm, then you could've kicked them out and taught them a lesson."

"trust me, i wanted to but i can't i'll lose my job so i just sucked it up and patiently worked with them and even gave them a free bagel."

"not the free bagels, baby. they'll just come back again for more." ni-ki huffs.

"i know but what am i supposed to do." you sniffled as the tears that unknowingly appeared falls. you were just mad and exhausted. ni-ki obviously heard it so he pulls you back and cups your face.

"hey hey, don't cry. everything will be fine. why don't i run you a bath and then order some of your favourite food, okay?" he wipes the tears that were falling down.

"will cuddles be included?"

"of course. cuddles will be included. now, just lay in bed and i'll get the bath running." he pecks your forehead and goes to move to bedroom. however, you grabbed his wrist.

"carry me to my bedroom?" you pout. ni-ki smiles and scoops you up in his arms. he princess carries you over to your bed and places you gently onto the mattress before going over to the bathroom and getting ready the bathtub.

you had shut your eyes for a bit since you were tired but the exhaustion took a toll on you and you fell asleep for a little. ni-ki shakes you a little. "baby? the bath is ready. go enjoy it, i already placed an order so the food should be on the way soon."

you hummed and went over to the bathroom to remove your clothing and step into the bathtub. you laid your back against the edge of the tub and shut your eyes again. the candle light making everything moody and warm. you were enjoying the comfortable warmth and silence, much better than the bustling sounds at the cafe. this felt nice.

you had spent in the bathroom for about 20 minutes or so before deciding to get out of the tub. you didn't want to your fingers or toes to look like dried prunes so you decided to just get out of the water. you had grabbed the towel and dried yourself off. you could hear a knock at the door.

"baby, i have pyjamas with me. i forgot to leave them inside the bathroom." you opened the door to ni-ki. he had one hand out to hold the pyjama set and the other hand covering his eyes. a very gentleman thing of him to always do if you came out of the shower in just your towel.

you had noticed he too was wearing a pyjama set and it was similar to yours. of course, he loved matching things with you. you grabbed the pyjamas. "mmm, i think you forgot to grab my undergarments."

his ears quickly turned red in embarrassment. "ah, i knew i forget something. i-i'll just leave the room so you could change." and so ni-ki bolts out of the room and shuts the door. you shook your head, laughing a little since he was so adorable.

you changed into the pyjamas after putting on your undergarments and then went out to the living room. there ni-ki was, turning on the tv and searching up your favourite anime to watch together and setting up the food onto the coffee table. you had come up behind him and back hugged him.

"i have the best boyfriend in the world." you say. ni-ki smiles.

"well, let's not forget your boyfriend is one of a kind. where can you get another nishimura riki, member of boy band enhypen, in the world." he boasts. you playfully rolled your eyes and released him.

"that's very humble of you, riki." you playfully say.

"oh, i know. i'm just that hot." ni-ki smirks. you laughed.

"yeah, you are. now, will my hunk of a boyfriend please just cuddle and eat with me?"

"of course, i'll eat with my beautiful and amazing girlfriend any time." he steals a small peck to your lips and settles down on the couch. you gave him a playful gaze and settled right next to him.

after some time, you found yourself tangled with ni-ki. your legs and his long ones were somehow crossed in between in each other as you cuddled like cats laying together.

"oh, it's over?" you say.

"no, it can't be." ni-ki gasps.

a flash to the tv showed 'season 2 coming soon'. it made both you and ni-ki groan. "that's lame. we have to wait for the next season? that's going to take 1-2 years." ni-ki whines.

"they're going to pull another 'Spy Family' thing where there isn't going to have episodes in the next season, i can feel it." you complained.

"boooo. let's watch something else." ni-ki grumbles.

"yeah, let's watch-"

"let's watch, you. you're really pretty." ni-ki says as he stares down at you. ah, this playful and teasing ni-ki is appearing now.

"that wasn't that smooth, riki."

"well, to me it was. besides, this is a signal for you to reward me and i don't know give me a kiss or at least a peck? i am an amazing boyfriend, right?"

you snort, "yes, riki. you are but you're not getting that peck."

"what? why." he pouts.

"because..." you got closer to him and watches you with adorable doe eyes. before you unexpectedly peck him and ran away. ni-ki sits there confused, trying to analyse the situation properly. until he finally digested it.

"hey! get back here!" he yells as he tries to chase after you.

you could've not felt any better.

and being with ni-ki helped it.

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miyaur · 11 months

Text

pairings. blade x gn!reader

synopsis. nsfw alphabet w blade gg ez, a-n only becuz im l-l-lazy....

a - aftercare (what are they like after the deed?)

blud lowkey don't give a shit about you if you aren't that close, lmao

but if you are, probably kind of clingy, and really caring. a lot of cuddling, don't tell me i'm wrong cuz i'm NOT.

in some cases, and instances, those.. 'activities' you both have do make him quite exhausted, and most of the time it really just ends with him showering you, cleaning you up, and just being in his embrace (more utc.)

b - body part (their fave body part, of themselves, and their partner's!)

probably for himself; would be his hands. just in general, plus he knows how well they treat you anyway! so why wouldn't it be his favorite? and for you, probably loves everything, doesn't know what he'd do without it, can't decide on one sole favorite, maybe your stomach and probably your neck!

c - cum (cum, anything to do with it)

will cum on your face, if not, he'll come inside, nothing in between.

i dont know how to elaborate here but um, the way his cum be sprayed all over ur face is just so mmmm to him. makes him hard all over again!

d - dirty secret (self explanatory)

not rly dirty, but wants to see you get a necklace with his name on it, or a collar with his name on it, and while he pounds so recklessly, he wants to see that pretty little pendant of his bouncing up and down on your neck, very fond of the idea, but never would actually say it to you, unless you really push him enough.

e - experience (has bro done the deed before?)

maybe? not that experienced probably, but has messed around with somebody before yes!

he knows what he's doing though, don't worry. but overall probably just did it once or twice, barely can call it sex

he probably read about sex before doing it with you, cause he wanted it to go perfectly.

f - favorite position (self explanatory pt2)

just as long as he can see your face, missionary, cowgirl, let it be anything, just as long as he can see how your face just gets so corrupted because of his big cock.

g - goofy (is bro serious about sex?)

very serious, it's almost funny, but it isn't, he's dedicated, and will show it.

but maybe when you both get closer, and are able to be more intimate with each other, in relationship wise, and etc., sure he'll laugh once or twice about a mistake he's done.

h - hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

um, yes and no?? i don't really know, i can't rly tell, like maybe thrice a week sure, and the rest of the week he don't really care, it gets messy when you both fuck anyways. and yes, black hair, thats it, idk how to elaborate ab this LMAO

i - intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

gets too embarassed. no he will not show his blushing face, even if he's already inside, probably takes like, a round or two before he does

kind of like, he'd giggle about it and go okay bae

but also would be the kind of guy to go, "i want to be the only man, the only person, in this whole galaxy, this whole universe, to make you feel like this."

j - jack off (master bait :D)

yes, very often, no other choice, i cant say otherwise. likes to imagine its you on that monster ahh cock instead of his hand, be real, he the type to do that. uses imagination wisely, and does it when you're away from him, on a mission, or whatever, needs you 24/7 tho

k - kink/s

degrading you like it's his life's purpose. loves you like it's the calm life he's been looking for since forever, but will degrade you, calls you slut, whore, made for his cock, and all that jazz.

oh but facesitting; super big fan, wants to just be in you, tongue up in your hole, while he just strokes his cock, just needs you to sit on his face so bad

be so fucking honest w me, he probably turned on by the idea of getting pegged, or getting anal. won't admit it out loud, but he wants to get treated like a prince. like just wants you to make him feel so good, that's it.

l - location

doesn't give a fuck if other people hear, will fuck you in an alleyway if he feels like it, or if you feel like it, in the public bathroom <3 but just way prefers being in bed with you, feels more romantic, and gives off more feeling to the moment, in his own opinion, will do whatever you're comfortable with.

n - no no

roleplay, anything related to it, it seriously grosses him out

non con, in general, he's disgusted by it, i know that for a fact.

don't degrade him please, he's heard, and been called all kinds of names before, and it's not like he ever liked them.

don't hurt him, it's clear in his skill he does hurt himself in the process</3, im sure he seriously just wants to love you, and wants it back, his degrading is to a small extent, and it's just in the heat of the moment thing!

#hsr scenarios #hsr x you #hsr x reader #hsr smut #hsr blade #honkai star rail scenarios #honkai star rail x you #honkai star rail x reader smut #honkai star rail x reader #blade x you #blade hsr #blade x reader #honkai star rail smut

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channelnintendo · 10 days

Text

i love nintendo. like i love how even though most game companies these days are just obsessed with hyper realism and graphics and optimization and theyre so into it they put nothing else in their games and just release really same-y boring games, but then you got nintendo who is just. passion and whimsy incarnate. just absolutely overflowing with creativity and fun in the face of an industry thats getting more and more boring

and despite all that boring other stuff and how negative the world is, nintendo just goes:

"hey lets make a mario game thats just... Silly. lets make mario an elephant. lets have flowers that talk like a tumblr mutual. lets put daisy in there. we heard sonys been rushing their devs really hard lately so you know what?? no deadlines. devs can work on this game for however long they want."

"lets make a zelda game where you can just do whatever. you can build anything. you can build a car, a helicopter, a boat, a house, a house car with flamethrowers, a catapult, a bokoblin death trap, anything. just let them do whatever they want. lets put link in a bunch of feminine outfits too he would rock them. also you know that one employee whos hecka thirsty over ganondorf??? yeah they get to design ganondorf go ham friendo"

"the pokemon fanbase has so many demands lets divide and conquer, two games that each fufill all their demands. one thats gonna have a total reconstruction of the pokemon formula where you're in the ancient past of sinnoh and you survive in the wild crafting and throwing pokeballs and making dear friends in a cruel world. and then another with the most content and story of any pokemon game with a deep story that dives into the trauma of losing a pet, the horrors of how modern school systems treat autistic people, and the importance of having things to cherish in life. also the pokemon get to wear silly hats in a cool new mechanic that lets you customize pokemons types. also theres this new pokemon shes a girl with a giant hammer that hunts corviknight for sport and shes awesome"

"cringe culture is dead, heres a fire emblem game where the protagonist has red and blue oc hair and marth himself tells you that you are the fire emblem. also the intro is as 4kids-y as we could possibly make it and its so awesome"

"heres a game where squids shoot each other with tons of cool paintball guns and theres these two characters named pearl and marina that are just blatantly madly in love. we also just made a public statement saying we'll always support lgbtqia+ rights even if japan doesnt. this made the hatebase seethe and yell even harder than usual but we stay silly"

i love that, i love them. thats just five examples but theres so much more

idk i could never imagine hating nintendo thats sad and boring. a world without nintendo would be so miserable and dull. (not to mention without nintendo we'd lose so much other stuff. no mario means no sonic which likely means no other sega games like persona. no earthbound means no undertale/deltarune and honestly most indie games are inspired by nintendo games but we'd lose all of those without them)

and idk the way so many people hate nintendo but Dont hate like. sony, microsoft, and all those guys. it really just shows some people outright blatantly hate fun. they cant stand nintendos defiance against hyper realism and all that framerate graphics junk. they see creativity and they scream and yell in anger because they cant stand it. pathetic

oof. itd be dreadful. i dunno why the internet hates fun so much. social media doesnt have any excitement or whimsy anymore, just tar pits full of hate and trying to start arguments to make people as miserable as they are. thats reallyyy sad and i wish they could just know its okay to have fun. stop trying to look cool just Live its okay. cringe cultures dead have fun have whimsy live life be creative enjoy creativity and passion. i love nintendo. everyone should love nintendo.

#nintendo #nintendo switch #super mario #super mario bros wonder #the legend of zelda #the legend of zelda tears of the kingdom #totk #pokemon #pokemon legends arceus #pokemon scarlet and violet #fire emblem #fire emblem engage #splatoon #off the hook

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ritz-writes · 6 months

Text

@asleepyy so sorry for tagging u twice in one day and i hope im not bothering u with my brain rot 😅

but yes, i did actually dissect the lyrics. yes, i am actually insane. and yes, i love this au quite a lot.

here are my notes and what i think each song represents, tho its mainly just the vibes i get. i made notes as i listened to them (note: i see songs almost always in animatic form. idk if that will effect how i imagine what each song means, but i thought it might be worth mentioning)

join me as i lose my mind over the course of an hour and a half

say what you think: def making me think of them both in heaven and jophiel wanting to ask questions.

running up that hill: AHH this one hurt. very obvious as well. jophiel seeing that azazel shouldnt be a demon. "And if I only could I'd make a deal with God, and I'd get Him to swap our places." i am sobbingggg

what difference does it make?: at first i was going to say its jophiel wanting to figure out what went wrong but azazel makes them promise not to, but i think its better suited for azazel understanding hes a demon, but he cant help but still have faith in the almighty

please please please let me get what i want: fuckkk is this about azazel being a demon but still wanting to do good 😭 short but still painful

ever fallen in love (with someone you shouldn't've): my first reaction to the title alone was like the second image of the kambucha girl meme. anyway i think this one is about them becoming friends (or more?? 👀) but knowing its seen as wrong. "And if I start a commotion, I run the risk of losing you and that's worse" makes me also think of jophiel talking to the metatron and realizing he shouldnt ask about azazel lest he risk the poor thing being smited.

nothing critical: ohhhh this one gives hella vibes of jophiel not trusting heaven and knowing "something isnt right here" in regards to the fall-- HOLD UP "I know, someone had to go, If not him it'd be me instead" HELLO??? aziraphale asking for jophiel??? is this like after he finds out what azazels name used to be??

flowers never bend with the rainfall: hmm... i feel like this is a plot point song. not sure why. but "And I hide behind the shield of my illusion" makes me think it pertains to azazel

bird in space: oh this ones a bit tricky. i think ive reached the songs that no longer fit the lore we've been given thus far. so the only thing i can think rn is jophiel enjoying earthly pleasures? not rlly sure

angel, won't you call me?: oh fuckkk is this about a fight they have? "I fled at the face of my rival. When I felt his breath at the back of my neck. Angel, won't you call?" theres no way that isnt about azazel saying smth and then leaving, only to be scared he severed his tie to the only person thats been nice to him.

the stranger: first of this is a bop and im loving it. very groovy. the first thing that comes to mind is the "choose your faces wisely" prophecy. ooo is this about jophiel trying to convince azazel hes still meant to be an angel? that he wasnt meant to fall? also, the last verse is sticking out to me... not sure why

all i think about now: fuckkkkk this is giving me the vibes of jophiel finding out azazel Fell cuz of him and feeling guilty about it. "If I'm late, can I thank you now?" FUCKING OW?? oh yeah for sure this is about jophiel finding out and being sucker punched with guilt

ill be your mirror: oh goddd this song. i know crowley listens to this song but i cant remember what its about so lets see. AH SHIT YEAH THATS RIGHT. okay so jophiel reminds azazel that he is inherently good, regardless of if hes a demon. thats what im getting from this (also just tihnking of that ask i sent about the reflective sunglasses bthwjegkrw)

me and my husband: okay all im getting from this is "they r down bad". they r very very very much in love. getting vibes of this being after they stop the apocolypse. or maybe their feelings developing thru the centuries

time in a bottle: oh man this song always gets me. okay so, this and the last song r giving the oh-shit-i-might-be-in-love vibes. but this one is with jophiel's pov, while me and my husband is azazel's

ritz note: the last couple songs have been cute and lovey and i am now terrified of what the next ones r gonna be. cuz i know this fandom. and i am not ready for the pain. i am afraidddd

lonesome town: i fucking called it i knew the happy wouldnt last 😭😭 they had a fight didnt they. yeahhh they had a fight. FUCK why is this so sad but so pretty

across the universe: is this one sad too??? hang on theres a bit thats not in english, what does that mean... "Hail to the Heavenly Teacher." okay so i assume this is an azazel song. this is just making me think of the bookshop fire, but its azazel thinking jophiel died 😭 ....i am staring at the lyircs. i am glaring at the lyrics. this song MEANS something. i just dont know what. but its important. im squinting at it very hard (note: i came back to this song and am STILL glaring at it. its like. its like im seeing it covered in sand but i know theres gold underneath. i cant SEE the gold, but i know its there. this is driving me nuts /pos)

no wonder i: hm.. im not rlly sure with this one. OH?? is this azazel finding out heaven isnt that good?? "Suddenly I'm not so sure. That intentions can be pure." hmmmmmmm

what do they know?: holy shit okay this is a completely different kind of song than the others. im.... glaring at these lyrics too. feels like a plot point but cant tell what it is. i think its about jophiel? maybe heaven too?? idk im grasping at straws with this one

sea of love: oh yay a happy song again 😌 okay this is just short and sweet. gives me forgiveness and/or confession vibes.

who are you, really?: this one sounds important and i am glaring!! makes me think of "we dont need heaven we dont need hell" and also "a demon/angel that goes along with hell/heaven as far as he can". also just makes me think of jophiel speaking.

the moon will sing: i fucking love this song but i dont think ive ever looked at the lyrics so lets goooo. right away i see "I could have been anyone, anyone else. Before you made the choice for me" and think of aziraphale asking and falling for jophiel, and in a way making the choice of jophiel staying an angel. "Instead, I made a bed with apathy" jophiel trying not to care about a random demon. "I shine only with the light you gave me" jophiel giving azazel ideas on how to do "good" while being "bad". also with that line, thinking of azazel saying that to god and being sad about having fallen AUGHH i have a whole animatic in my head with this song and im losing my mind

matephor: hnnnn another important sounding song. jophiel vibes. fight song perhaps?? "Don't look too hard 'cause you won't like the scars he left in me" azazel vibes??? this one is elusive to me but i love it. okay im slowly getting more azazel vibes. like azazel trying to convince jophiel that he is a demon and fell for a reason

providence: right away getting "heaven and hell r bad" vibes. OHH okay okay this is giving me hella jophiel vibes, but specificly snarky and sassy jophiel vibes. of being like "oh yes heaven is oh so great, we kill children! but its for the greater good, of course. gotta beat hell and all that, even at the cost of innocents. all for the almighty and her ineffable plan." (this song is a bop omg)

earth angel: oh i know this one but only with crowley and aziraphale, so im excited to listen to it with an oopsie omens mind set. omg wait why does it hit HARDER. love sick azazel is such a cute image 🥺🥰

what more can i do: hmm.. them being in love but knowing its "forbidden"? cant tell who i imagine with it more

starman: this is just them. classic good omens song, regardless of the au. love to see it 💖

a pearl: AH FUCK ANOTHER SAD ONE. mitski whyy. hm.. azazel song? jophiel?? i think jophiel... tho my mind might be turning to mush at this point so im not sure. one of them is sad

duvet: oh def azazel vibes. oh maybe some jophiel vibes too?? i can see it swaping povs. i think it fits azazel more tho.

ritz note: OKAY the next song is in a different language and for a split second i legit thought i was having a stroke when i pulled up the lyrics ngl bgkewrrkjq

différent de toi: no idea what this song is about but its pretty 😊

oh thats all of them! i think the first half is more coherent observations, while the second half is just... rambling a bit lmao. idk if any of this makes sense. i might also be looking for things that arent there with these songs, but oh well. this was fun!

and now, after looking back at them all, i really does just slowly derail near the end lmao

#kinda hesitant to post this #but i think i put too much work into it not to so #here we go <3 #good omens #good omens au #ritz rambles #long post

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communistkenobi · 11 months

Note

there are things you cant change and you shouldnt hurt yourself trying just to please other people. and that's okay as long as you're respectful about it. i dont like dick and i probably never will and that doesn't change how i treat trans women with no bottom surgery nor does it make me see them as anything other than women and if that makes you see me as a transphobe then there's nothing i can do about that 🤷‍♀️ there is never a situation where its ok to pressure people to have sex in a way they're not comfortable with and if you cant understand that then idk man get better soon

I told you to stop replying to that post but if you want to do this out in the open then sure we can do that

your claim that “conservatives tried to force me to like dick” is based on an essentialistic, extremely transphobic and patriarchal understanding of what a penis is. Conservatives don’t want you to “like dick” they want you (and all trans people) to remain in the closet, get heterosexual married, be Christian, and make babies. That’s not a command to “like dick” that is a demand that all people conform to white western cishet gender norms, and conflating the two is fucking transphobic! You are imbuing a particular body part that people have with deep political, social, and sexual meanings, and those meanings are deeply transphobic in general and transmisogynistic in particular. “Liking dick” or “not liking dick” is not a coherent or useful way to describe a person’s attraction to an extremely broad range of people. If someone said “I’m only attracted to people with vaginas” that would be an insane and obviously transphobic statement because it means that there is some level of sexual interchangeability between cis women, trans men without bottom surgery, trans women who have had it, and certain types of intersex people, and that there is something fundamentally different with people who have a penis that makes them essentially unattractive.

“Genital preference” is an extremely loaded and fraught term. It is the site of particular types of sexual violence against trans women specifically. It is based on the assumption that attraction to the rest of a person’s body and their genitals can be fully disconnected from one another, that genitals hold some essential quality that can be judged on an attractiveness scale regardless of the bodies they’re attached to, that what genitals a person has prescribes a very specific and narrow set of sexual acts that can be engaged in. This is transphobic rhetoric, full stop.

And for the last fucking time I’m not “pressuring” anyone into having sex with people they don’t like. Nobody is telling you to “hurt yourself” into liking a penis. You are getting ridiculously angry at a random trans person online describing the problems with “genital preference” as a framework and spouting virulently transmisogynistic rhetoric to justify said anger. The things you have said and are saying to me right now are insdistinguishable from the transphobia cis people spout, even the progressive ones who say they’re supportive but they just can’t get past how disgusting and unattractive our genitals are. You are having a temper tantrum about the simple claim I made that transphobia is deeply bound up in how people view sex with particular types of bodies, and your reasoning for why I’m wrong is “well because I feel like it” so why should I take anything you’re saying remotely seriously?

I’m done replying to you. Fuck off

#asks #transmisogyny tw #transphobia tw #even old new york was once new amsterdam

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todayisawthewhxlewxrld · 1 year

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"i cant help but Want You"

"i know that i’d die without you"

synopsis// after your childhood best friend disappeared, you vowed to become a hero and find him, refusing to believe that he was truly dead. truly gone. and you did find him, just not in time though.

pairing// touya todoroki/ dabi x gn!reader

word count// 2.9k

content// angst.... yeah thats pretty much it... could be read as platonic or romantic doesn't rlly matter

notes// this is basically my dabi smau but like better. (anything is better than my bnha smaus lets b fr). half ass fight scene tho cuz idk how to write fight scenes so take that as you will!

Touya and you were inseparable; you did everything together, including getting yelled at by Endeavor. You two were best friends, and if being attached at the hip didn't make that obvious enough, the best friend bracelets you made would. You vividly remember the day you gave it to him; how could you not, considering it was one of the last times you ever saw him?

You walked quickly toward the almost completely white-haired boy, nervously fiddling with the bracelets in your hand. You were afraid he would hate them, which was silly considering how much Touya adored you.

“Hey!” he said happily as he rocked back and forth on his feet.

You gave him a nervous smile and a small wave before saying quietly, "Hi." You frowned once you were close enough to see the new bandages that had wrapped themselves around his wrists, and if you looked closely enough, you could see them under his shirt. “I thought you were going to stop training?”

He rubs the back of his neck sheepishly. “I know, but I really made a break through!” He speaks triumphantly: “At this rate, Shoto’s got some serious competition! I don't think it's enough against All Might yet though..."

“touya-“

“Just trust me! I just wanna show dad what I can do, okay? I want to prove to him that I'm not a mistake," he says at the end, trailing off.

You nod and smile at him. “When are you showing him?”

"At Sekoto Hill during the holiday break!" He speaks cheerfully and looks you up and down before noticing that you are holding something. “Hey, what's that?”

You go wide-eyed, having totally forgotten about the bracelets you made in the first place. You stumble over your words as you hide your hands behind your back. "Oh, um, it's nothing..”

He smiles and tilts himself forward and to the side as if he's trying to look behind your back. “show me!”

You sigh as you push him back to his original stance. “fine but dont laugh! okay?”

Touya nods happily. “I won't, I promise.”

You reluctantly bring your hands back out from behind your back and expose your palm to him to reveal the bracelets.

He looks down at your hand and narrows his eyes curiously, then looks up at you, tilting his head as he questions, “Bracelets?”

You nod as you close your fist and hide your hands behind your back again. “Yeah, I, um, actually made them for us. They’re best friend bracelets..” You laugh nervously as you peer up at him through your lashes.

He stifles a laugh. “Then why aren't you giving it to me?”

You look at him in bewilderment. “Wait, you actually want it?”

He looks at you in astonishment. “duh?” He takes your hand from behind your back and softens his gaze on you. “You’re my best friend, y/n.”

You feel your face grow hot as you try to hide the smile that's so desperately trying to reveal itself.

“Now give me the bracelet,” he deadpans.

Both of you had never taken the bracelet off since that day. The holiday break ended up quickly approaching, and on the day Touya was going to show Endeavor what he could do, he could see how nervous you were for it.

He slowly intertwined his hand with yours, and when you turned to look over at him in confusion, you were met with him smiling softly at you. “I’ll be okay.”

you frown. “I know you’re strong, Touya; you know you’re strong... so why do you have to prove it to that prick?”

His smile doesn't falter completely, but it isn't as strong as it was a moment ago. “You know why.”

"Yeah, I know, I just don't like seeing you get hurt," you sigh.

He squeezes your hand in an attempt to be reassuring. “I know, but hey, listen! If it makes you feel any better, you can come watch too!"

“Really?” you ask, taken aback.

He nods happily. “yeah! You're like good luck, along with our bracelet!"

you frown. “Wait, you’re not gonna be wearing the bracelet I made you, right?”

He looks at you in confusion. “Of course I am—I just told you it’s good luck.”

You look at him flatly as you speak sternly, “Touya, it's not fireproof!”

He shrugs your statement off. “It’ll be fine!” He adds on quickly, almost nervously, “So you’ll come tonight, right?”

You smile at him and squeeze his hand. “Yeah, I’ll try, Touya. You know how my parents are though.”

He hums sadly. “Oh yeah, huh… Well, that's okay if you can't! at least I'll have your bracelet.”

You spent most of the day with Touya, only leaving when it was time for dinner; though the word "leaving" is used loosely, it was more like your parents having to practically pull you away by force in order to get you to go home. Once home, you ate dinner then barricaded yourself in your room. You knew your parents would never willingly let you go up to Sekoto Hill, so you'd have to wait until they were asleep to go. Luckily, they usually fall asleep early. Now all that was left to do was distract yourself until then. You went back and forth between reading a book, cleaning your room, and playing with the matching bracelet you had with Touya on your wrist, you did anything. After awhile, you just settled on the book, but sometime during it, you ended up drifting off.

You were jolted awake and immediately scrambled to figure out what time it was.

“Shit, I'm late!” You muttered under your breath as you sneaked out of your window and toward the forest, where you hoped Touya was still there. You'd never forgive yourself if you missed this, even if he had said it was okay. You ran as fast as your wobbly legs could carry you, panting as you decided to take a shortcut, and when you got to the end of the road, you saw a group of people staring out into Sekoto Hill, and that's when you smelled it. The smell of burning wood, smoke, and ash filled your nose immediately, making it hard to breathe as you pushed through the crowd and made your way to the front, where you found Endeavor staring ahead with what you thought were tears in his eyes, something you didn't know he was capable of.

To be honest, you don't know what you're looking at—you know it's a burned-down forest, a burned-down Sekoto Hill, but other than that, you're perplexed.

You cough a bit from the smoke as you stare up at Endeavor. “Where's—where’s Touya?” you ask.

Endeavor doesn't bother saying anything; he just shakes his head.

You swallow harshly as a feeling of dread starts to settle itself deep within your stomach. “what? What does that mean—where is he?” You stumble over your words as you grab at Endeavor’s arm, trying to get him to look at you, to acknowledge you more than a simple head shake.

"He's dead," Endeavor says flatly, shaking your hand off his arm.

“What?“ You look toward Endeavor, then at the forest, and then back at Endeavor and then back at the forest. You laugh nervously, obviously not believing him. “you’re lying…” Tears start to well in your eyes as you turn back at Endeavor and see his bottom lip trembling. “Tell me you're lying!” you sob out.

When Endeavor doesn't answer and instead swallows harshly, you lose it. Your legs are running faster than you can keep up, and you're sobbing as you run into the forest.

“y/n stop!” Endeavor's voice echoes in your ears, but you don't stop. You start running faster and deeper into the almost completely disintegrated forest.

You know you'll only find burnt pieces of trees and black ash covering everything, but that doesn't stop you from going; you need to see it for yourself; you need to see Touya. Even with your vision blurred from sobbing, you can't see any evidence that he was here—or rather, that he died here. There's no burned body, no bones, and no human ash (which you're not even sure you'd be able to tell apart from tree ash and Touya's ashes, but nonetheless). You fall to your knees and make a vow to yourself: You'd become a hero, but not to surpass Endeavor or All Might; you'd become a hero to bring Touya back home because every part of you refuses to believe he's dead, and you'll continue to refuse to believe it until you see his remains right in front of you; until then, you'd train hard, harder than Touya; you'd train until you nearly died from exhaustion if that’s what it takes to bring Touya home, dead or alive.

And a hero you became—a top-five hero, actually. though you didn’t care about your ranking at all because you never lost sight of the real reason you became a hero in the first place. How could you when the bracelet on your wrist was a permanent reminder of what you were doing this for? of who you’re doing this for. And for the most part, your hero career has been easy—well, as easy as being a hero can be. The League of Villains wasn’t a huge threat, at least not until now.

You were out on your nightly patrol around the city when you came across a few villains fighting against some of your hero colleagues. You immediately jumped into action, aiming for any villain you could. It wasn't too bad at first because there were only a few of them. The fight was between four heroes and four villains; it wasn't too bad until more villains appeared, and now there are too many for the four of you. Now it seemed like each of you was fighting two villains at once, which wouldn’t have been too bad if they had been unknown, low-ranked villains, but they were part of the league, and the league doesn't mess around.

For the time being, you were holding your ground; of course, you were getting knocked around, but you were doing well—or the adrenaline coursing through every part of your body was telling you that you were doing well, which is why you hadn't realized you were bleeding—profusely. You thought your blurry vision was simply from being hit in the head a few times and not because you were actively bleeding out. Though suddenly, through your blurry vision and dodging and swinging and whatever you do during a fight, you can make out faint blue flames in the distance, and you feel your heart stop—a brief thought of Touya crosses your mind as you look down at the bracelet on your wrist, which was a fatal mistake because that gave the villains fighting you more than enough time to knock you out, and knock you out they did.

You woke up abruptly; you would have jolted up had it not been for the pain covering every inch of your body. You breathed in deeply, trying to take in your surroundings. You were lying in the middle of the cold street, right where you passed out. You turned your head to the side, and the whole area was in ruins—fire here and there, broken buildings, broken cars—it was a mess. Your chest felt heavy, and no matter how hard you tried to breathe in, it didn't feel like the air was getting into your lungs. You coughed up the air that wouldn't get to your lungs, and with it came blood, which splattered onto your hand before dribbling down your face onto the ground beneath you, which you could only imagine is soaked in your blood at this rate. This isn't looking good for you at all. Though you are quickly taken out of your thoughts by heavy footsteps approaching you, you turn your head up only to see someone hovering over you.

Dabi laughs sadistically. “Wow, they got you good, huh?”

You don't say anything; you don't think you even could If you wanted to, blood would probably just pour out of your mouth, so you opted to glare at him, swallowing your metallic spit harshly. It was obvious you were scared; how could you not be? You're on the verge of death, and a top villain is hovering over you.

Dabi bends down and grips your jaw with his hand; the hold he has on you has your head lifting off of the ground. "You know, seeing a hero flat on their back —helpless— really does something to me," he smirks.

You were going to reply, telling him to fuck off, when the moon hit his wrist just right and you could see something glisten. You almost go cross-eyed as you focus your attention on his bracelet—your bracelet?

Your gaze shoots back up at him as you speak harshly and accusatorily, "Why do you have my bracelet?”

He scoffs and shakes his head, looking down at his bracelet before looking back at you. “your bracelet?”

Both of you stare at each other for an uncomfortable amount of time before both of you go wide-eyed at the realization.

“t-touya?” Blood spills out of your mouth as you stumble over his name. You don't know how you didn’t see it before; he still looks like himself, just broken. He was still himself, just broken.

He swallows the lump in his throat as he sets your head back down on the ground gently. He knows you saying his real name should be confirmation enough, but it's not; he needs to see the bracelet, which is why he's grabbing at your limp arms looking for it, muttering "no" over and over again under his breath, and he finds it immediately, and he breathes out shakily, mumbling out a heavy “fuck” in defeat.

Despite the circumstances, you find yourself smiling at him, and he feels his heart break as he sees the blood stuck in your teeth and the blood that's dribbling down your face. He sits down on the floor—or rather, falls down, the weight of this realization being far too great for his legs to bear—and pulls you into his lap.

“What the hell are you doing?” he asks in disbelief, looking down at you in sorrow.

“I've been looking for you, Touya,” you wheeze out, and it makes him wince.

"Fuck. Fuck," Dabi—Touya says in pain as he closes his eyes and tilts his head back, facing the sky. He looks back at you and frowns. “Why would you come here? Why would you want to be a hero? Fuck y/n-"

You weakly bring up one of your hands to cradle his cheek, and if Touya’s tear ducts were still intact, he’d be sobbing so hard and so much that he could fill all the swimming pools ever to exist. But although he can't cry, the blood coming from the staples around his eyes certainly makes it look like he can.

“I told you why,” you whisper breathlessly, as if it were getting harder for you to breathe, to live.

Touya cradles your face in his hands and sniffles. "We're going to get you help. I know someone who can help you. You're going to be okay, ok?" He ends his sentence by moving his hands to cradle your body, standing up with you in his arms, bridal style.

You groan at the movement and pull your hand away from his face. “touya-“

He shakes his head and starts walking. “No, no, don't say anything. you’ll be okay.”

You look up at him through heavy eyelids and blurry vision; your breathing is labored, and you know that nothing Touya does and no one he brings you to will help; this is it; this is the end. You use the rest of your strength to smile at him. “I'm really happy I got to see you one last time, Touya.”

Touya stops in his tracks and looks down at you; your eyes are closed at this point, and he can't tell if you're still breathing. "No, no-y/n, cmon, don't do this to me.” He shakes you in his arms a bit, but you do nothing; you're limp, and he falls to his knees. “Y/n please- Please wake up. I can't—I can't do this without you.”

He can't; it's true. The only reason Touya survived this long without you was because he knew you were alive. He'd look up your name every night, praying to god that it didn't say deceased, and it never did—until tonight. Tonight he doesn't need to look up your name to know if you're dead or not because you are, specifically, in his arms. He’s just sitting here on his knees, holding you close to his chest, rocking back and forth, repeatedly mumbling "please" under his breath, and he doesn't even know why he's saying please. Please come back? Please take me with you? Touya is too immersed in you to notice the heroes starting to surround him, and to them he looks like a spoiled brat clinging to his favorite toy for dear life in an attempt to not get it taken away.

“Put the person down and surrender!” one of the heroes calls out.

Touya ignores him, and now all the heroes are yelling at him, asking him whether he wants to do this the hard way or the easy way, and he doesn’t care. There's nothing to care about anymore because you're dead, and he wants to be dead too.

Because you're dead and he knows that without you he can not live.

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soldier-poet-king · 8 months

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hello!! no pressure to answer this but i was wondering do you have any recommendations for books, specifically books that made you feel things very deeply? i know that's vague and weird but like i also love the goblin emperor/baru cormorant/similar books as you and i was wondering if you had any faves you'd like to share :) i am looking for a book that will put me in agony in a good way lol

HELLO FRIEND

okay so I am a Big Emotional Dummy so everything makes me feel very deeply, whether or not it's actually any good. So I'll try to keep it to recs that I felt alot while reading, after reading, and I think are actually good.

Also idk if you want specific genres or sticking to fiction, so I'm just gonna throw a whole whack of things at you, hope that's ok!!! I'll also try to avoid super popular recs (like trc or ursula k le guin) not because i love them less, just because you've probably already heard of them?

Hands of the Emperor - Victoria Goddard - probably my current fave book and protag, read it twice in less than a year despite it being like 1200 pages, if i loved it less i could talk about it more, and without crying. maybe it's niche and imperfect, but to ME? book of all time

The Queen's Thief - Megan Whalen Turner - fave book series for more than a decade, makes me experience shrimp emotions that nothing else will ever be able to replicate

Piranesi - Susanna Clarke - how did a portal fantasy meets psychological horror become actually the most existentially comforting book in the world

Tuyo - Rachel Neumeier - technically a series, with 3 main novels and other novels and novellas about other characters (which i enjoyed less but still), but def start with tuyo. I fully went in expecting to not like it At All and was blown away???? I wept. I still weep. I can't explain why I love it without spoilers but it's technically a fantasy war story and yet is almost entirely character driven

Wind, Sand, and Stars - Antione de Saint-Exupery -reading this rn and technically it's billed as a memoir and adventure novel but actually its an existential meditation on the nature of human interaction and the soul and definitely comes from the same core as The Little Prince

If you HAVENT read the cemeteries of amalo/thara celehar spinoff of the goblin emperor PLEASE do, in many ways i love them even more than tge bc thara is up there with kip mdang in terms of characters i cant talk about without crying because it's too personal

The Sparrow Duology - Mary Doria Russell - PLEASE check the trigger warnings, unlike most of the recs on this list, this falls way more to the side of Baru in terms of dark content, but also it's maybe the closest I've ever come to being at peace

I'm definitely missing things, but these are all the books that have made me want to chew drywall in the last 2 years. I've also linked my goodreads here with the caveat that my ratings skew high because i am very much a 'i didnt say it was good, i said i enjoyed it/was entertained' type person. also i have read a lot of trash YA. oops. like yes some of it is real bad but also some of it makes me Feel Some Things even (or especially??) when it's real bad.

Friends pls chime in with your recs, and also please rec things to me!! Am seeking new and interesting emotions previously unknown to humankind.

#recs open to everyone EXCEPT rae who is spiders georg and recs me books every week #AND I CAN NEVER CATCH UP DFJHASKDL #i mean rae i love u and ur recs are so good but GIRL IM SLOW #anyway. 3 of the books on this list are rae recs so. yknow. shrimp emotions #fran reads #looking at my faves shelf on gr and like #ohhhh there is some cringe there except cringe is dead i killed it #yes terribly plotted dumb ya book is there bc it UNDERSTOOD MY EMOTIONAL ANGUISH AGED 18 #and made me want to live #so there ya go #i am inventing all new emotions everyday babeyyyy

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rotworld · 2 months

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Hi there,

I want to rant about fetishes. I know I'm into the more violent stuff, and I'm pretty sure I know why (lifetime of self-hatred and trauma to boot), but recently I've been dabbling in the guro side of things and I feel ... guilty? Ashamed? Also idk how to filter guro so I only see the things that work for *me* (drowning, bruises, beatings) and not the other stuff (dec*pitation, graphic torture). At the same time I cant help but feel like I'm what's wrong with the world. Do you have any advice for me?

pretty heavy talk ahead. i’ll start with the advice and end with a personal anecdote if that’s useful.

i want to start by saying you’re not “what’s with the world.” there are a lot of reasons people seek out gore and graphic content. for some, it’s morbid curiosity and for others there is a fetish component. if you’ve been through something traumatic, i think there’s a draw to view violence from a “safe” distance as a form of catharsis. none of that makes you a bad person. but i also think it can cross very easily into a form of self-harm and become dangerous.

i don’t know you well enough to make assumptions beyond what you mentioned here. if you’re experiencing a lot of distress or discomfort, or feeling more negative about yourself, then you should stop seeking it out completely. it might be something that you view to “punish” yourself, or use to distract from other upsetting thoughts or feelings, especially if it’s something you’re looking for compulsively or extremely frequently.

i also recommend cutting back on real gore, especially videos, if that’s what you’re looking at. those will desensitize you the more you watch them, and you shouldn’t be desensitized to real human suffering. those people in “infamous gore videos” don’t exist in a vacuum, they’re real people with childhoods and families who went through horrible things, and now it’s on the internet forever. if you’re worried that you’ve already hit that point of extreme numbness and don’t feel what you should or don’t feel anything, you’ll be okay if you stay away from gore for a while. those feelings you thought you lost will come back. when they do, i’d maintain that distance. stick to simulated gore in fictional horror media like movies or games instead.

in the past, when people have approached me about having guilt or shame about their interests, i generally told them not to worry. there’s nothing wrong with having noncon fantasies, or enjoying horror-themed erotica. as long as you’re able to distinguish fantasy from reality and don’t impose those fantasies on people who don’t consent to being involved in them, you’re fine. i stand by all of that. but this is about gore specifically which i feel is a little different. morbid curiosity or interest isn’t unusual but you have to keep it healthy and responsible. even if it’s purely fictional gore that’s giving you this reaction, you should still stop viewing it. it’s not “silly” or “weak” to acknowledge the emotional response you’re getting from something.

now the personal anecdote. i started writing explicit guro in 2016 (shades of it had been in my work before then). i had just graduated, i was feeling really lost, adrift and desperate for community, and i was extremely online. i followed a few people who reblogged real gore and went looking for it outside of tumblr a lot too. i was obsessed. i think i told myself it was “reference” for my work but it had the catharsis and fetish element for me too. these horrible things happened to other people instead of me, i could revel in it safely from a distance. but it wasn’t “safe,” it was harmful. it was so far beyond “curiosity,” it was a fixation and a crutch. i looked at it so much that it stopped feeling real and i forgot that the people in those videos were people at all. it was just a blur of gruesome, awful shit all the time.

there wasn’t any single thing that made me stop. i think eventually it just wore on me too much. i wasn’t doing any of this stuff in moderation, i was online constantly, i was posting constantly, i was writing intense guro constantly. and there’s nothing wrong with making a lot of dark art, but i wasn’t engaging with any of my other interests or living my life much outside of it. i have boundaries i stick to for myself now. medical resources, roadkill, pictures people share consensually of their own injuries, things i might come across over the course of my normal life are fine. i don’t go looking for anything more extreme than that anymore, and i don’t even go looking for “acceptable things” all that often anymore. that kneejerk “god that’s awful” response that i’d lost is back. some people have a higher tolerance for this stuff than others, but i’m not “some people.” i know myself and i know what kinds of things i can become unhealthily reliant on and why, so now i’m much more careful. you know yourself best and you have to decide that for yourself, too.

#rotpeach answers

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v1vian-th3-f4nfic-wr1ter · 28 days

Text

An Eternity With You

«Chapter 3»

Warnings: Arguements (All Four) Physical Injuries (Arthur to Gerald and Reader) Hurt no Comfort (Gerald and Reader) Smoking (Felix) Mention of Sex (Idk Anymore)

Authors note: Who wants to see Felix be absolutely an depressed twink? Also sorry i havent been active, been very busy and also writers block, i wrote the plot as i go, this story is now a joint story between me and becca because i want to have the most people enjoying my/our writing

Written by: V1vian and @fckedupnerd aka Becca

You were walking with Gerald towards a bakery that has caught your eye since dating him, still unaware of the secret relationship between him and the chocolate cartel, the winter air made the coat you borrowed from him all the more cozier, though Gerald seemed uneased passing by the Galarie Gourmet buliding, "Hey, are you okay...?" You asked him "Oh yes am fine, just a bit cold from the air" He shook it off. You suspected something else but didnt want to push any furthur, you arrive home safely and without issue, you kiss him goodbye and he walked back to the Galarie Gourmet, alone in your apartment, you wonder what made him so uneased

Meanwhile Gerald was just returning to the vault, Arthur and Felix stared at him, wondering why he was so late, he was always the earliest out of all of them, theres no way he woukd be caught in traffic or be late because of getting food so why is he late now? "Well Gerald it seems like youre late, care to explain?"

"Well the café i go to didnt open yet and there was a new perdon there so i had to explain my order, anyways i got food" He held out the takeout orders, hoping and praying he hid the fact he was just out with you well enough so they dont know about his affairs, he feels extremely gulity about it, but he still holds them to his heart dearly, they eat...well Arthur and Gerald, Felix didnt touch the food and only drank his black coffee because of his own ED, but the two of them didnt push, they both know he'll throw a hissy fit at them, though its a bit pathetic really

Days went on with you and Gerald going out in secrecy

He always had an excuse to them, believeable enough so none if the other two knows about his affairs, well except Felix, he was being irrational and decided to follow Gerald, it wasnt a good idea sure but they have also done much more illegal things, so he followed the two of you quietly, disturbed he was having an affair, he was seething in jealousy by you, unable to believe such a petite woman would catch his heart, it made him go to Arthur and tell on him, by the time Gerald came back, they were already glaring at him, he knew he couldnt hide it any longer, so happens you followed him into the vault by secret

"I cannot believe you Gerald, after everything we've done for you?!" Felix yelled in anger "Its not like you helped me in my buisness either, Fickelgruber!" "How dare you use my last name you foul git! You-" Arthur split them apart "Thats enough of you Felix" He glares at Gerald "Though that doesnt excuse you from the conversation"

"Its still a fact you are incredibly lazy and an idiot at most, you cant even do anything without someone saying it!" Gerald rolled his eyes

"Youre the one to talk, youre bossing everyonr around like puppets!" He rebuttles

"Thats because you and Felix cant do anything in buisness, sure both of you are creative but you especially have no knowledge of putting it into action!" Your jaw drops at the sight, but you stay hidden for now

"Oh thats strong coming from you, you know nothing of anything else BUT buisness!" Felix yells

"Big talk from someone who pukes himself to death!" Gerald argues

"You have no say in this when you cant even do things correctly, not even helping your own mistress! All you can do is throw money at them!" Arthur yells at Gerald loudly

You tried to sneak away but Felix spotted you "And YOU, you can only pay rent because of his pathetic ass being your sugar daddy!" You gasped

"At least i dont use Gerald as a servant!" You yell at Felix "Oh please, dont even look decent for how much money he gives" Arthur said as he gestures to your clothes

"And you! You cant even go for what? A day without yelling at him from what i can tell! And at least i actually have a sense of fashion, not just "i am rich" as my whole personality!"

"Well you can hardly tell what a privliege is, and all you can do is whine to Gerald for money!" Felix spits out in jealousy

"Stop talking, you cant even feed yourself properly, Felix, Talk when you can actually take care of yourself, at least shes healtheir than you! Am surprused you can even do sex when youre a twig!" Gerald yells back

"AND you cant even go for one week without sex with Arthur!" You say with pure sass "And you! You may be strong but your ego is as week as Felix's self esteem! Gerald has every right to have an affair with your toxic asses!"

Arhur slaps you in anger, leaving a mark as red as a cherry, Gerald slaps Arthur back for hurting you. He slaps Gerald back much, MUCH harder, drawiing blood from a cut on his cheek, Felix crosses his arms and smirks in victory. You help Gerald get out of the vault, none of you speak afterwards except you and Gerald, the other two's whereabouts are unknown, Gerald is too hurt to care.

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