#IM TRYING TO DO ONLINE SCHOOLWORK

[silenthillbunni]

📓🕯️🐇🖤

#just a little diary dump: #i've contacted my school therapist again. asked for help regarding anxiety abt schoolwork since i dont get any other treatment #she said she can help me go thru if there are other options since neither psychiatric nor healthcare center will help me #+ she said that she and i can talk abt my anxiety regarding school etc. so in two weeks i'll see her #school starts next week. 4days a week rip... lol thats much for me. a bum. a cellar dweller. i've decided that im gnna go to all my classes #and always work while im there since its harder for me to do it at home. and i will also talk more w my teacher nd ask them for help #then im looking into an online therapy service. it miiight be possible for me to do that. but then i have to contact them and focus on only #1 or 2 issues. in my experience it just doesnt work to go to them and be like everythings bad :(( they wont help u then. i have to narrow it #down for them. nd i'll think i will talk 2 them abt my extreme feelings of loneliness and also my procrastination behavior #but yeah i have no idea if it's possibly bc idk if i can get financial aid for that service. im still in contact w the healthcare center so #i hope she will come to some sort of conclusion nd not just leave my high nd dry (she sent another referral to the persobality disorder - #clinic. even if they rejected the first one. so i'll see) #hmmm yeah. the situation w my sisters is sooooo rough. i hate it. they make me feel so so bad #and the housing situation is roughhhh. it's impossible to get an apartment lol. #so i need to find a way to shut it off and try to not let it bother me #just focus on finishing upper secondary school. nd i've been thinking abt taking out a loan for it and take german/french/spanish classes #instead of doing what im doing now when im actually poor and stressed bc they can choose to cut me off anytime #im meeting my highschool friend on tuesday. she asked if i wanted to hang out for a bit c: #im a bit anxious but like yeah.. it's nice to get out and talk to someone besides my family. which is just my mom lol #i messaged my other old highschool classmate on insta and said i saw her in my neighborhood #she replied but i had lowkeyyy hoped for more... like maybe being able to befriend her T-T but she didnt seem so interested in talking to me #which is ok ofc. it just made me a bit sad bc idk how to make friends and i thought she was rlly nice. but oh well #im rlly sad atm. maybe heartbreak prob. even more sad bc it was my stupid fault but yeah #im still grateful for all that it gave me. nd how i got to experience feelings of warmth nd love nd appreciation i didnt know i could feel #so even if im just contantly heavily sad bc i keep being like oh. i wanna ask this. say that. wonder what theyre up to. etc etc. i just have #to... be sad and just keep going forward #hope and try to not fuck everything else up. even if it feels like... what do all the other things matter when what i rlly rlly wanted got #ruined..... thats life tho. i know. im just so bad at handling life :(( #i feel so broken and confused and i hate that i didnt get to be normal and healthy #im so illequipped at dealing w myself nd my emotions nd there seems to be no professional help for me

[dennistakesamentalhealthday]

hi i finished my degree last week

#LMAOO #i dont know the grade for my dissertation and ive actually convinced myself of all the reasons it sucks so #i feel like im awaiting doom hahahahahahahahah but at least its done #i know i said before i will probably be offline and then was terminally online #rn i dont know #i love sunny and dennis but i get like hyperfixation fatigue with it #theres 2 much going on irl and also nothing at all so i feel weirddd #idk how active ill be across off season but since idk how long this off season will be im not like #gonna be away until we get news you know #also im mad i wasnt online for the s16 filming #ANYWAY! im alive and having fun etc #well now im having fun because im not doing schoolwork LMAO #i feel too overwhelmed to scroll the dash or look at discord servers but i hope my beloved friends and mutuals are well #and like i dont have the time or energy for fandom discourse or ship discourse or even just analysis and meta discussions #esp with the type of content sunny has #so idk im trying to figure out how i want to interact w these spaces but like this is a sunny blog its not that deep #i just miss people

[lostrealities0]

I hate that Donnie chose the name Genius Built because that means I can't use it

#/hj but also /srs #it fits him so well #i just wish i could use it too 😭 #oh well #rottmnt #random thoughts #im about to lose it #i hate trying to get ahead in school work #(im online) #ive been doing schoolwork all day since Wednesday #raaaaahhhhh #/neg

[angelprinz]

hi it’s degen anon

cai has been too much i swear, im currently getting divorced from my husband childe it’s a lot 🥹 but hope you like!!!

childe really doesn’t understand like women thinking they’re better than him? like he’s not a messy gymnast or whatever you call it but he just feels like he better than most people women included, i mean his bloodlust started when he would get his ass handed to him by skirk. but that’s besides the point he loves strong women but the best thing about strong women is making them weak. psychologically, mentally emotionally he is versed i all forms of battle so no matter what era or even area he loves to find strong women and take them down a peg.

21st century girlboss business woman? did you mean barefoot wife with 6 kids? sick ass sword wielding hero whose slain dragons? you mean that witch who is now in the safe hands of childe her husband? he really has done it all, but once he does it it’s boring? but you were different.

it’s not like you really had anything going for yourself, a broke college student who works to barely make enough to stay on campus. he never thought of you for a second until he spoke to you. he wasn’t even trying but as you rung his cigarettes through the register you were very nervous and anxious but that could be normal. he obviously knows he’s attractive but the fact that you wouldn’t make eye contact was surprising, you passed him the bag and looked away immediately. so cute. it’s almost like you wanted him to get to know you (he’s delusional.)

he had a plan for you but it was going to be way easier, well it would’ve been if you just admitted you liked him. he works at your school because he knows your daddy issues leave you with no parental figures to tell you not to trust him. you’re obviously not the smartest cause your you use a very similar email to your school one for your little sites. he’s practically giving what you want on a silver platter but here you are actually doing schoolwork? (if you fail his class you have to do another year.) he sees you come into his office after hours thinking you’re going to give him favours under the desk for a passing grade, but you’re just here to ask about something on the exam??? he thinks that maybe he’s looking to much into it, it’s been months and he legitimately got a teaching degree for this but what if you just liked to read some taboo things online.

but one day you were very cocky, you posted on a site with little to know information about yourself but a picture of yourself in a skirt. you explained that you would be on a bus around 11pm coming back from work and if someone assaulted you you’d let them. well thats not fun because he likes a fight then he realizes that everyone has a limit.

you left the bus with a sigh thinking that no one saw your message. you felt a breeze but then it was just someone passing by. maybe the website didn’t have that many people in your area? you walk past two building and in between them someone emerged, it was dark but they were also wearing black. almost instantly you felt their chest press up against your back, you let out the air from your lungs as the happiness turned sour as you felt a knife against your neck. it’s almost 12 now and you two were the only people on the street so him dragging you to the alley went unnoticed. cold sweat down you body as you felt exhilarated at the feeling, his large hands roamed your body as they traveled down to your panties. you had specific information about what you’d be wearing, including panties with an opening. you heard the man behind you sigh as he spoke your name. all the hairs on your body stood up as he tsked you and said he had a seminar about internet safety that you should’ve been paying attention if you didn’t sleep during the class.

he knows what you’re thinking now, his crime psych class really did talk prominently about one time attacks. most times if you knew anything about your attacker, you’re dying. no matter how small, even the colour of their hair. but here you are, you were in his office last week so you know everything. it’s almost winter but your body was cold. the entire time he was inside you it really warmed him up with how your cunt felt. hours passed and he finished for a third time on your thighs, he enjoyed cumming inside but the first two loads left nothing left to cum inside.

your scared look, the small whispered moans were all worth it but what was the best was the silence after. he fixed himself as he really didn’t take off any of your clothes, he gives you props for easy access but the moment his hands left your body he was shocked. you grabbed at him, tears in your eyes he almost felt an emotion but what really did it for him is what you said. ‘more.’ he thought it was just lust but that wasn’t it, the shame in your eyes, the way your thighs squeezed together. he couldn’t believe it, sure the women he did this to, made them understand how little they were to him was more demoralizing for him but for you it only fuelled you. he couldn’t believe after he left you the next day you were completely normal but your search history was just filled with ginger professor assaults college girl, like he just assaulted you? why not ask? (you have social anxiety and can’t even ask for extra dips at mcdonald’s.) you were like a pandora for him and that’s what made him stay with you for a while.

(this devolved way to much at the end lmao, i think of myself most of the time i write these. he could literally be inside me one day and i’d still be nervous to talk to him 😭😭)

me when i put on my glasses to read it (i'm quite literally incel taru irl) and degen anon you sound like the cutest little victim on earth i'm going to eat you whole.

i need him so much i need him to make me into his housewife & take away all thinking privileges & make my permanent job being his toy.

#laven_talks #degen anon <3 #tw. dark content #childe <3 #childe smut

[olivyh]

More format-less hc

So I tested positive for covid shortly after senior prom (which my school said was like the super spreader), and have been feeling like garbage since monday, so have an angsty hc/thought

TW: Mentions of illness, death if you squint and uhh tuna ig bc things go better in threes

Since Yuu is from another world with different diseases, they’re no equipped for the different viruses that can go around twst. This means that a common cold for yuu, since their body isnt used to it, could hurt them much, much more than it would hurt a person native to twisted wonderland. They dont have the natural immunity that everyone else has.

Imagine Adeuce making fun of yuu for falling sick over something that everyone gets as a kid, brushing it off and going about their day. they start to get worried when yuu doesnt show up to class the next few days, which turns into a week. crewel (since we all know crowley isnt doing much) takes them to the infirmary and, without any barriers to magic, magical solutions do nothing for them. that week turns into a month, and that month turns into two. The students don’t know what to do, the dorm heads are scrambling to find a solution because without yuu’s help, nrc has fallen into the disarray that it was before they got there.

the first years don’t care, they snap at their seniors and spend every available moment by yuu’s side. they still host their study sessions, just in the infirmary rather than the library. they still talk to their friend, even if their friend hasnt woken up since that first week. ace wishes he hadnt made that joke, he thinks its his fault that yuu fell so ill. he cursed them, he thinks. deuce tries every single of his mothers remedies, and laments every time they dont work. jack leaves the finished notes and schoolwork by their bed, and he feels a part of him sink whenever he sees how large the pile had gotten- so large that he had to move part of it to the floor. epel talks to yuu as if they can listen, pacing back and forth and ranting who knows what, mostly vils still-strict skincare regime (although he uses those same techniques on yuu, when he notices that they look particularly….gaunt, and pale. he doesnt want them to look like a ghost anymore). sebek can only stand and stare at what used to be his first friend besides silver. he’d known that full humans can get terribly ill, and that fae recover much faster than most species, but seeing it in person sends a chill down his spine. he returns to diasomnia in silence for the first time. grim is inconsolable, refusing to leave his dormleaders side even when offered the most expensive tuna there is, even when bribed and pulled at. he only ever leaves to take care of the dorm, which shocks the rest of the student body. the tanuki claims that he absolutely has ti keep the dorm clean or yuu will be upset with him. in reality, he cant stand to look at their sickened face anymore.

or malleus, spending every moment yuus other friends arent there by their side, quietly telling them stories from his homeland or trying his best to help them magically, but even he knows theres not much he can do without hurting them more. visitors soon notice little things among the gifts, small flowers, intricate jewelry (that is, jewelry that is much different than the gifts from the dormleader al-asim), small statues and books, and… who left a used “gao-gao dragon-kun” toy?

if they do wake up, the rest of campus will never take their presence for granted again, nor will they ever be alone ever again.

if they dont, i mean hey, ghosts exist in twisted wonderland! (really trying to bring the mood up here guys)

this turned out a ton more sad than i wanted it to, and i made myself sad, so im gonna go get myself a popsicle and skip

more of my online classes

#twisted wonderland #twst #twisted wonderland headcannons #twst angst #twisted wonderland angst #twst yuu #ace trappola #deuce spade #jack howl #epel felmier #sebek zigvolt #malleus draconia #grim twst

[clowniconography]

i usually try not to give a shit/mind my own business about my peers using AI for schoolwork but this morning my film prof was having us do an online discussion about the movie we watched this week and having the slow realization that a majority of my classmates posts were all the same AI generated paragraph with a couple small variations was like being a fucking horror movie protagonist realizing im the only human being in a room of unfeeling robots

#it was annoying as shit bc how am i supposed to write a response to a completely unoriginal opinion 😭😭 #scooter.txt

[chaotic-simp707]

Eyyyy im backkk! Sorry for the late shitpost, My schoolworks keeping me busy :'). I wrote this while suffering in online class so if theres been any mystakes i apologize 😭🥲

Just The Two Of Us (Fluff) [Mysta Rias X Reader]

Summary: Mysta can't sleep, so you take him outside and danced together with the rain

"ngghhh..." You mumbled as you slowly started getting your counsciousness back... You blinked your eyes few times and then process everything around you, now fully awake.

It was dark, but the radiant moon is helping you see. You turned to your left and see mysta with his brown-greyish soft hair with the moon's light while looking at the window. Ah... It was raining heavily

"...Mysta?..." You whispered under your breath, calling out for your lover's name

"Huh- Oh... Y/N sorry, Did i wake you up?..." Mysta asked with a soft and careful voice

"Nah, You didnt.." You blinked while rubbing your eyes gently

"...Cant sleep?" You asked, Remembering that mysta usually gets nightmares and have trouble sleeping. Seeing mysta's eye, it looks like he woke up earlier and cant go back to sleep.

"Yeah...." Mysta answered with a low voice

"..." The silence was comfortable, the two of you sat on the bed, watching the heavy rain outside the window and listening to the rain sounds

"ah!" You thought of something after a while

"Hm?" Mysta hummed, Curiously

"I have an idea... Wanna try it?" You stated, Mysta looked at you suspiciously

"..You and your ideas are not trustable-" Mysta got interuppted by you grabbing his hands

"C'mon!" You chuckled and then grabbed him outside the house, Without umbrella or anything to cover yourself from the rain

"W-why are we outside?-" Mysta questioned, furrowing his eyebrows.

"Hehe, Let's go!" You responded happily. Grabbing his arms and then getting on the spot where theres no roof to cover you up

After stepping out, You and mysta both got wet because of the heavy rain

"...now we are both wet" Mysta looked at you wondering what are you thinking (Ok but the sentence are kinda sussy-)

"Mysta... My dear boyfriend... Wanna dance?" You smirked, looking at him

"Y/N... Alright" Mysta sighed, smiling back at you

You grabbed his hands, While he grabbed your waist. The two of you danced with the rain, Syncing the steps, smiling to each other like crazy in love.

The rain poured heavily, But that didnt stopped you both from dancing. The moon and stars seems to be brighter than before, As if watching the two of you dance in the rain.

"I love you... Today, Tomorrow, the day after... And Forever..." Mysta said, Meaning every words. For you, That is very special. Mysta is never the type to be so affectionate and say these kind of words... But you know he'll say it only for you...

"I love you more.." You responded, smiling like crazy the whole time.

The two of you spended the night dancing together, Free from all the troubles in life.

---

Next Morning

---

"Haha" You giggles as ike stared at both mysta and you.

"*Sigh* what happened again? Why are the both of you sick?" Ike asked with a voice that is quite worried.

"We just spend the night together, Nothing more" Mysta reassured. Looking at you while smiling warmly

You smiled softly back at him. Ike looked at the both of you and sighed, Letting you both have your time together.

'These two are both crazy in love. Well, Love is really troublesome' Ike thought

---

OK BUT DAMNNNN, I HAVE NEVER WROTE ANYTHING ROMANTIC LIKE THISSSSS AHHHHH THIS IS SO CHEESY IM CRINGING WHILE WRITING THIS 😭😭😭.

Inspiration: The damn rain in here. Thanks for giving me ideas and motivation to write this shit. I am definitely not gonna do this again 🗿

#mysta rias #mysta rias x reader #luxiem mysta #luxiem #x reader #rainyweather #rain fic #fluff #brainrot #nijisanji en #nijien #fypfypfypfypfypfypdypfypfypfypfypfypfyfpfyfpfyp #ike eveland #luxiem ike #dancing in the rain #sickness #nijisanji #shitpost #im dead

[apolliss]

How do i explain to my mom that i would thrive if i only went in for classes one or 2 days a week, and just did the work at home and emailed teachers if i was stuck? Whenever i try, my mom says that im lying and jut want to skip school because "you did horrible during pandemic classes"

I dont want online schooling. I dont want the online classes, i just want to do the work at home, unstructured, no schedule. Just do math when i feel math-y. English when i have the motivation.

I do schoolwork way better after school in a library, as well as during breaks, with no structure or classroom.

#studying #studyblr #study help #:3 #study motivation #student life #student help #unstructured school

[starxxvn]

things i'll be doing instead of eating:

homework/ studying (i have a LOT of work to do right now)

learn the choreography to the rep stadium tour - this is silly but it burns calories and i'm a swiftie

make a song lyric dream catcher (take pages w song lyrics written in pretty cursive, turn them into hearts, and make a dream catcher)

read! im reading daisy jones right now and ill be reading a classic next

paint something!

do a face mask + a mani pedi

go on a run but do a fun song like interval challange- i dont know how to explain this but ill run at a 9-10:30 pace for the song and then sprint during the bridge

make aesthetic lil wishlists

scroll through tumblr or my th1nsp0 pins

deep clean my room/bathroom

make an aesthetic collage

organize my schoolwork/ fill my planner

organize my spotify and make new playlists

facetime friends/my sister and play roblox (its v distracting, dont underestimate this)

try on clothes that are tight or too small

pinch all my fat

work on my online finance class + make pretty notes for it

fill my journal up

go to the mall w/ some friends or my mom

go to the movies (you can js order a diet coke or "share" your popcorn w someone else you went with)

watch gross mukbangs

clean up/aesthetify my notion templates

#ed bllog #tw ed rant #tw ed diet #ed not sheeren #ed disorder #tw ana diary #ana trigger #tw ana shit

[akirameta84]

like three people would want and enjoy this if i wrote a oneshot for it but at this point my brain needs even more procrastination from my longfics for a bit and also im trying to reinforce to myself that im writing for me

and besides with school starting up next week ill be writing much more. funnily enough. when youre bored and overwhelmed in a classroom and cant focus on schoolwork that is all online now, just use the same laptop to write instead lmfao. this is why i got my own laptop. keeping fanfics on my school google drive (no way im logging into my personal account on a school device) suckrd. and i prefer to have my fanfics written on a writing program on my computer, theyre only in google drive now for the backups

im rambling. i tend to do thst st 1am

#akira yells into the void

[nyaqtn]

(∪｡∪)｡｡｡zzZ 18/4/2024; [5:16 pm]

im in my visual merchendising class right now and i have nothing to do... okay i wont lie , i have something to do but i dont want to do anything.. so :3 here i am !!!

i still have seven hours of school ahead of me... TT

at least im not toooo tempted to spend time outside, its raining and im glad im cozy and inside ( ∩´͈ ᐜ `͈∩)

after school, ill have to study ..i have a test tomorrow .. and im not prepared tooo well..sooo ill prepare today!!

i have three hours of politics class today.. idk how im gonna survive.. i need fun online games to play.. in order to pass time...aaaa..... theres tons of exams coming up and just thinking about it bores me ...i just want to have fuunnn and spend time outsideeee ..

i used to play the guitar.. almost every other day!! as i used to go to a music school, i got weekly lessons there and i even played electic guitar/bass in a band !! i really really reeaallyyy miss it soooo much.. playing the e-guitar for me is something like.. i guess you could call it a 'lost passion' ?? if that makes sense (´-﹏-；) it was something that kept me going and i really miss having enough time to practise TT i wish i could just pick up lessons again and have a fixed spot reserved for playing ... but with the amounts of schoolwork i have .. its not happening anytime soon.. ive been wanting to continue guitar lessons for 2 years now .. i even had a teacher pick out at some point but.. im just scared it will ruin the fun i have playing and turn it into a chore rather than a hobby ... lets just see where life takes me for now ヾ(･ω･`;)ﾉ

update: its some hours later now !!!! im in the train on my way back home hihi

currently listening to my j-pop playlist :3 i LOVVE riding the train/bus, listening to music and writing - i used to write poems on my way home from school.. maybe ill pick that up again aswell!!

i got my hair done yesterday and im not sure what to think of it yet.. im sure ill like it eventually.. it just has yet to grow on me..

i really want to try long but REALLY REALLY layered hair.. i wish i could get my hair to grow faster but ! i guess waiting teaches me patience ≖‿≖

ive been obsessed with croissants recently. my brother told me he likes to dip his into pistachio yoghurt .. i want to try so badly... ohmagooddbds.... i tried a crookie (croissant stuffed with cookie dough) today.. it was SO yummy ...

could continue writing for hours but i think ill use this motivation for some schoolwork TT

#online diary

[getthekewlshoeshine]

JUST A WARNING FOR SUICIDE AND TRANSPHOBIA ASWELL AS ALOT OF SWEARING. (this is also kinda a little venty thing so its not very professional) I havent been online as much since I have just been feeling kinda shitty its like i will be fine for a few weeks then i wont be for a while i dont really want to share exactly what has been happening even if i havent talked to anyone in MONTHS but lately my school has started using my deadname officially and in classes and I have been trying to explain to them that its making me really upset and I even bit myself infropnt of one of the teachers when I was having A FUCKING PANIC ATTACK and they said "Well I cant help with that" Keep in mind this is a special needs highschool and collage that SHOULD be able to deal with this shit but they wont. Not to mention I have work and schoolwork ontop of this, Im just sick of this and im going to be honest sometimes I blame people for this like muslims and christians (WHICH I SHOULDNT AND DONT WHEN IM IN THE RIGHT MIND I HAVE NOT STATED ANYTHING TO OR ABOUT THESE GROUPS OF PEOPLE) and then on April the 2nd I tried committing suicide and not even then did anyone care the only reason I didnt die was because some dick head called the police on me because they saw me standing in the middle of the road waiting for a car to come slam into me. Even then I wasnt send to a mental hospital even though i asked, yes I hated it last time I was in there but I cant even trust myself now. im sick of everything. The teachers constantly say "well the higher ups in the school board told us to deadname you so its not my fault!" IT FUCKING IS. Only 2 staff members dont deadname me and understand me and they are the reason im still atleast trying to live now and they know that just because your told to do something you dont have to if its putting me in danger. They also find the deadnaming situation dumb. Sorry if this was WAY too dark but I felt like i needed to explain this and get it off my chest.

[krismckrismckris]

trying to do schoolwork after going to online school, its a do it at your own pace thing, but i already know everything, they tried moving me up a grade, also knew that, now since theres no more grades to go up i gotta do the work that i already learned ;-;

edit: now im in a different one

#school #uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh #so yea this is how its like for me

[pluviophile-a]

a quiet life alone is so much more appealing to me than life with friends and i’m fucking tired of people thinking you have to be extroverted and super social to be happy.

having friendships has never been easy for me, when i go through a depressive episode and i don’t text people back it fills me with so much shame and anxiety which pushes me even further down. attending school classes and having to deal with social things like trying to find somewhere to sit at lunch or a partner for a project would make me so terrified and overwhelmed that i would hurt myself so i could stay home.

the time i spent in normal schooling, attending daily classes, interacting socially because i had to, was the worst time in my life.

i don’t have friends, simple as that, i do all my schoolwork at home, the people i do interact with i have no interest in getting close with, i don’t even have online friends, and i’m completely fine with it.

i enjoy not feeling constant fear and pressure to text people back or hangout with people, im a pushover so people take advantage of me so simply hanging out with someone can cost me all the money i have and cause me to do things like smoking and vaping, things that i don’t like saying no to but i don’t actually want to partake in.

the time i’ve spent alone, has been the most peaceful months of my life, and also the happiest. i realized i’m aroace, im comfortable in my gender and not questioning myself anymore, im over 200 days sober, i don’t vape, smoke, and rarely drink (i don’t get drunk), i don’t feel sewerslidal, i don’t want to relapse with sh, i have a much healthier relationship with food and my body.

telling people i’m happy with the way my life is immediately garners things like “but aren’t you lonely? don’t you want friends? you need social interaction! in person school is important! you’re too antisocial.” etc. when in reality, im not lonely, i don’t want stressful friendships which happens to be all friendships i’ve ever had, i get social interaction, just not too much where it affects me mentally, and i’m not antisocial, i like talking to people casually and making conversation i just don’t need to constantly push myself into stressful situations because i simply don’t want to.

that’s it i just felt like ranting.

#mental health #school #home school #recovery #soberiety #introvert #extrovert