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#In the Flesh

i just finished the first season of in the flesh and will probably never recover

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Your least favorite protagonist? Why?

Probably Matt.

Not to say I hate him so much he deserved what he got (honestly no one does) but he was a massive jerk to everyone around him and I felt bad for the Springtrap AI because…..buddy….he may just be code to you…but you have no right to abuse him bc you think he’s “winning” when he’s just following his program.

I mean Matt was probably written to be disliked anyway and the author did a good job with that.

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I’m still snorting over the fact Merlin’s dad called Simon Monroe a “sheer physical presence”

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for archiving 


ASCEND // ACCELERATE ○ GEN ○ Dirk Strider & others, exploration of the processes of ascension to the ultimate self.  finished - my fave thing I have written for HS.

SOAPSTUCK. ○ NOT GEN* ○ The worse soap opera in all of history starring Karkat as The Adulterer, Dave as The Hot Pool Boy and Dirk as Husband Who Is Possessed By Demon Who Looks Just Like Him. discontinued.

UNSCRATCHED REMIX MIXTAPE ○ AU ○ DaveKat, SolKat, others. ○  On the eve of his induction into adulthood, Karkat Vantas prepares to face his destiny. As it happens, it’s not the destiny he anticipated. on hiatus.

O’ER THE TREES TO HADES ○ GEN ○ Exploration of Rose and Dave as seen in Pesterquest. finished

92 DAYS ○ AU ○ DAVESOLKAT ○ It’s a garage band au. Also Bro is arrested for fraud and embezzlement. finished

*i genuinely do not  how to rate this, rip. 


FROM ONE LIFE TO THE NEXT ○ GEN ○ The last thoughts of Rick Macy. 

HOW CRACKS BECOME DEBRIS ○ GEN ○ Kieren finds the bracelet earlier and Jem cracks. 

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Talking About Fazbear Frights - ¾ (Definitely Blackbird spoilers)

Bunny Call

- Yay we got another new character!

- And it’s a bunny who isn’t some sort of variation of Bonnie! Double yay!

- Bob is just a big mood. I relate to him on some level, I like my me-time too and don’t like socializing.

- One of his kids is called Cindy. Must be a FNAC reference because “Scott don’t do coincidences

- The cover is kinda misleading. I get that LadyFiszi wasn’t really told what Ralpho looked like aside from his outfit, but why make him look like one of those cymbal-monkey toys and not just a standard animatronic-looking thing?

- I love the scene where Bob has to fend off Ralpho. It starts with him just asking Ralpho to leave, thinking its a guy in a suit, and then all of a sudden its ramped up to 11 when Ralpho straight up tries to break in.

- Ralpho leaves at 6AM. Like Out of Stock, lovely translation of the game into a book. Now we need a story that’s just a security guard working a shift at Freddy’s.

- A wholesome ending with Bob deciding that he loves his family and hugging his kids and stuff. The story should have just ended there.

- God dammit there’s a cliffhanger ending that leaves us wondering what the fuck Ralpho actually was. Why, Scott? Why?

In the Flesh

- Okay so before we actually get into the book…can we talk about the fandom’s outrage to this story?

- Like, we have seen a dog get its throat and stomach ripped open, we get Sarah dissolving into pieces of junk and slowly dying, a toy with human eyes and teeth that bleeds at a certain point in the story, Stanley has several dolls crawling inside of his limbs, an absolute bloodbath of a springlock failure, Pete being brutalized for most of Step Closer, and a story exploring grief….but THIS is where you draw the line? Man is pregnant with furry rabbit is too much for you people? Okay.

- Oh and the body horror trend resumes!

- This story features YandereDev. Matt is an entitled prick, who is inappropriate with women, can’t handle criticism toward his game, wrote sloppy code in his game, is an incel…..Scott wrote a YandereDev parody!

- Springtrap’s Revenge does sound cool, I hope it gets made into an official FNaF game someday.

- Matt is also a sore loser. Dude, if Springtrap keeps kicking your ass, get better at the game.

- I love how the extraction program Springtrap uses to get into Matt is straight up called “its_a_boy.exe”. They’re not even trying to be subtle.

- Now Matt becomes even more of an asshole than he already was. Good on Jason’s girlfriend for telling him all of Matt’s bullshit. And good on Jason for deciding to leave.

- Don’t you just hate it when you visibly become even more bloated than before in front of a girl you’re arguing with?

- Oh boy, the infamous mpreg scene is here! It’s actually kinda gruesome, reminds me of that scene from Prometheus where Shaw had to get the Trilobite removed from her womb.

- I read “Daddy” in PJ Heywood’s voice and I regret nothing.

- Gonna be honest, this one is my least favourite so far. Not because of the ending, but because we have to spend the whole story with a complete tool who never changes or develops. He’s not like Alec or Pete, we don’t see him change or resolve to be better near the end, he’s the same dying as he was at the start.

The Man in Room 1280

- Okay so this is another one of my favourite stories, I had a good time reading this one.

- Horribly burnt, basically-a-skeleton William Afton is creepy. I can see why the nurses just want to get rid of him.

- blah blah blah, UCN parallel, blah blah blah, The One You Should Not Have Killed, blah blah blah, Scott please stop using alternate continuities to try and make sense of your confusing game lore.

- Interesting to have a story involving William where William isn’t the antagonist. Strange, but refreshing, in all honesty.

- Arthur is pretty interesting too. I’m not much of a religious person but I do like how he pesters the nurses through the whole story just to take William where he wants to go. I like Arthur.

- Andrew makes for a good antagonist, and it’s cool that the story takes the time to explore the dynamic the two have with Andrew stopping all the nurses’ attempts at killing him.

- Speaking of, those are some tense scenes in the story, each nurse trying something new. Morphine, suffocating him, trying to give him an embolism. Such dark minds.

- I get Arthur is dedicated, but surely even he should have stopped to consider what he was doing once William starts leaking black fluids as soon as you got him to where he wanted to be.

- And then William straight up explodes. No joke, his body explodes into chunks and Andrew walks away from him toward the shelves where he infects the other Stitchwraith-canon antagonists with his agony.

- What a morbid ending.


- About time someone tried to make a movie inspired by Fazbear Entertainment. With a touch of Edgar Allan Poe. Millie would be proud.

- When you revolve your horror movie monster around the idea of punishing people for their past mistakes, you probably shouldn’t confess to bullying and fat-shaming a girl.

- And confessing it to your friend who is also bullied for his appearance. Nice move, Nole.

- I see the train that ran over Plushtrap in Out of Stock is out for blood. Stay away from train tracks, fellow FNaF fans.

- When finding your dead friend’s blood on the tracks, you probably shouldn’t be thinking of the plot to your movie. Blackbird don’t do coincidences.

- Blackbird has his own alternate realm he takes his victims to she can torture them. Reminds me of Shadow Bonnie in my FNaF AU…did I predict Blackbird?

- Nole achieves redemption! Good on him for being brave enough to confront the truth with the girl he was bullying. This was a good scene.

- Wait Sam is alive? How the fuck do you get a broken leg but literally everybody thinks you’re dead?

- Oh and Sam used to be a bully too. Man, the Blackbird is going to hate you guys.

- Damn you, confusing cliffhanger endings!

The Real Jake

- Where do I even start with this one? Its just plain sad and depressing to read, especially since the epilogues already tell us where Jake ends up.

- Like Coming Home, this story really isn’t that FNaF-like at all. It might just be the most un-FNaF story in this series so far. The only link it really has is what ultimately becomes of Jake.

- Also like Dance With Me, this story breaks the body horror/identity theft trend this series as gone for.

- Simon sounds like Blanc from Five Nights at Candy’s. Another FNaC reference? Scott, what aren’t you telling us?

- I won’t dwell on this one, to be honest. It’s about a kid dying from a terminal illness, there really isn’t much else to say other than it’s a depressing read. They don’t try to sugarcoat anything here.

- I am curious to know how Simon ended up in Phineas’ collection though.

Hide and Seek

- Shadow Bonnie. Man, FNaF loves this guy but completely shafts Shadow Freddy. Does he not get love too?

- And once again our protagonist is an asshole. This time fuelled by jealousy of his brother’s arcade scores? Okay. These stories love giving us unlikeable pricks as the leads.

- Yeah, Toby, you probably shouldn’t outright break the arcade machine. The place probably has CCTV….you should be fired by now.

- Ah, here’s the body horror story. We get a nightmare of Toby’s back being opened up.

- Wait, Shadow Bonnie can enter people’s shadows and make them look like him? Damn, my AU is sounding really familiar with this book

- Ah yes, try drowning a shadow. That’ll work. Definitely. Said no one ever.

- So Shadow Bonnie is powered by anger and is weakened when Toby accepts defeat? Looking forward to the Shadow Remnant theories…

- Toby goes back to beat the game and defeat Shadow Bonnie….despite Shadow Bonnie’s weakness being admitting defeat. Okay.

- Also what do you know, the arcade is fixed! Thank God Toby never lost his job for damaging company property…

- So Toby wins the game….and then he kills himself so Shadow Bonnie is forced to detach from him. I’m getting confused here. So first he is weakened by admitting defeat, then Toby tries to win the game to beat him…and then he stabs himself in the back and bleeds out to defeat him. Shadow Bonnie is confusing, let me tell you.

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Do you spend at least 5 minutes a day thinking about a potential season 3 or are you straight

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There’s this show about dying that I always wish I’d showed you; it’s called In The Flesh. I mean, it isn’t exactly about dying; it’s about depression and growing up and not fitting in and… zombies. Yeah, okay, the show’s about zombies but the whole thing’s a massive metaphor, trust me.

To summarize it briefly, the show is about a young boy, Kieren, who comes back from the dead after committing suicide a few years earlier. He took his life after his boyfriend, who had been pressured into joining the army by his homophobic father, was blown up in Afghanistan. Kieren doesn’t exactly have an easy time moving back home though, since the rural northern village he lives in is very anti-zombie, given that before they learnt how to medicate them, all the undead sort of ran rabid around town killing people. Not exactly ideal, I’m sure you’ll agree. So yeah, a lot to unpack there, even though it only ever had 9 episodes in total (something I will forever be salty about).

From the first time I watched the show I fell in love with it. The fact I was so depressed at the time probably helped make me feel understood, but it went deeper than that too. I related to Kieren on so many levels, feeling trapped, excluded and suicidal and other ways I still struggle to put words to. Even the mere physiology of the zombies, the being cold, unhealthily pale, unable to eat and generally falling apart, seriously resonated with my situation.

There’s this saying they have in the show, an affirmation they call it, for the undead struggling with the guilt of what they did:

I am a partially deceased syndrome sufferer and what I did in my untreated state was not my fault.

I’ve always loved that. Not only is it obviously amusing conceptually, but I always felt as though a part of me related. I’m pretty sure I’ve never gone rabid and eaten my neighbour, so in truth I don’t know why I feel that way, but I do and so it weirdly brings me comfort. I even got a T-shirt with it on, maybe you saw it? I’ve had it years now and it’s been washed so many times the letters are starting to peel. I’ve had people, strangers even, comment on it before and laugh a little. I don’t mind, of course, I’m glad they appreciate the joke, but for me it’s more. It’s a reminder that I’m not alone when I catch sight of it in the mirror.

Okay so, I have a slight obsession with a zombie show, why am I telling you about it though? Well, because it very much contributed to saving my life back when I was younger and dangerously suicidal. There’s plenty of heart wrenching scenes in the show, but there’s this one in particular that really etched its effects into my soul. Kieren goes off on his own into the woods after things get shit again in Life Attempt Two, and when he returns home he tells his dad to open up. To just fucking tell him how he’s made him feel by being selfish and “disappearing again”. So that’s what his dad does:

“I was worried sick. You just go out. Don’t tell anyone where you’re going. No contact for days.

Jem thinks she knows where you might be. So I put on my jacket and get my torch and I go up into the woods. And I get there. I get to the cave. And there you are. You’re sitting down; you’re leaning on a rock. I think “thank God he’s okay”. But then I get close. I see that Swiss army knife I got you for your birthday. You’re covered in blood. So much blood.

I take you in my arms! I run with you! I run and I run and I run! But I can’t because you’re…”

The first time I watched that scene I sobbed. It broke my heart. I was someone who had been more than toying with the idea of ending my own life in a way not dissimilar to that, but this finally made the impacts of my decision real. When I first watched In The Flesh, I had been jealous of Kieren. Not jealous that he got a second chance at life, but jealous that he had had the guts to take it in the first place. I truly understood why he did it. But that scene, the final scene of the first season, made me feel so fucking guilty. It wasn’t that I didn’t care about hurting my family and friends in committing suicide, it was just that the pain I felt outweighed that guilt. But this, seeing someone confronted about their suicide and how the effects of a decision like that play out; it changed something in me. From that point onwards, as close as I got to ending my life, I could never go through with it. That scene just kept on playing in my head, a virus and a stark reminder that my actions would have consequences. That scene broke my heart and in doing so made sure that it kept beating.

So, Josh, do you see now why I wish I had shown you this show? I mean, I see it in a whole different light now that you’re gone; I’m on the other side of it all. I’m not trying to say that it would have saved your life too. I mean, that would be a lot of pressure for a TV show. But perhaps it would have made you feel less alone; I can think of a hundred ways you would probably have related to Kieren and other characters too. Maybe it would have just entertained you, maybe it would have brought you peace and comfort too. Maybe you wouldn’t have vibed with it at all. I can only speculate. But I wish like fuck I’d at least tried to share it with you. Should of, could of, would of, eh?

For the record, I think it would be pretty cool if you became a partially deceased syndrome sufferer. Although, maybe not the rabid sort. A word of warning though if you ever do: there would be a long queue of people ready to let you know what you did to them, and not all as calmly as Kieren’s dad did.

I miss you so much, Josh.


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sometimes you just have to look at your boy and tell him he’s incredible

[ID: a drawing of kieren walker and simon monroe from the final episode of in the flesh. it’s the scene after simon guides kieren out of the crowd at the cemetery; they’re sitting alone in the hospital waiting room, one empty seat between them. simon is looking at kieren with wonder and admiration, and kieren looks back at him with confusion and anxiety. kieren’s lips are still a bit stained dark from the aftermath of what he just went through. end ID.]

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Hey, you really gotta feel for a harf-working Assassin, whose victims literally came back from the dead. Twice.

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knowing that this is springtrap from in the flesh feels wack ngl

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Some of my favorite supernatural trios! 

 - Annie, Mitchell, and George from Being Human (UK)

 - Alex, Hal, and Tom from Being Human (UK)

 - Josh, Sally, and Aidan from Being Human (US)

 - Jesse, Tulip, and Cassidy from Preacher

 - Viago, Vladislav, and Deacon from What We Do In The Shadows

 - Simon, Kieren, and Amy from In The Flesh

(Poses are from

I don’t personally see these trios as poly ships, they were just some of the cutest and best poses I could find!)

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IN THE FLESH rewatch    season 01 episode 02 

“Deep down, fearing the Reaper is the reason why everyone’s so messed up in the head. They know the end is nigh, but there’s nothing they can do about it so it drives them nuts and they live their lives with one eye on the clock. We don’t have to do that. We can smash the clock to pieces. That is an incredible blessing.”

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So, ok, it’s a reunion … but now I’ve got a bad feeling that 2020 vibes of insanity are gonna carry on into this year and they’ll actually bring back that crap.

  • Whitechapel? Naaaaaa, let’s kill it off just when things were really kicking off and there was a whole world of things to discover and explain which would come full circle to the entire show so far.
  • In the Flesh? Naaaaaa, let’s kill it off though it’s barely got any episodes anyway, things were really beginning to kick off, and there was a whole world of things to discover and explain which would come full circle to the entire show so far.
  • Wonderfalls? Naaaaaa, let’s kill it off though it only had one season which got cancelled halfway through whilst airing, took a full decade before it became available to get hold of, and there was a whole world of things to discover and explain which would come full circle to the entire show so far.
  • The ORIGINAL (and only!!) Being Human (UK)? Naaaaaa, let’s kill it off but let it appear to have a natural, if ambiguous, end for the characters left even though the ones already gone could still return in an explosive storyline which would have taken it to the next level and bring it full circle. LET’S BRING BACK THE FAKE ONE INSTEAD!!

I. can’t. even.

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IN THE FLESH rewatch   season 01 episode 01

“No, I don’t feel ready.”
“That’s exactly why you’re ready. You’re feeling.”

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  • the first character i ever fell in love with: kieran walker (literally my first experience of gender envy; he made me trans)
  • a character that i used to love/like, but now do not:
  • a ship that i used to love/like, but now do not: lmao kieran & his evil first boyfriend had me on a rollercoaster the first time I watched s1 (but thats what you get for being an imperialist soldier)
  • my ultimate favorite character™: still kieran t.b.h.
  • prettiest character: jem i love her so much :)
  • my most hated character: philip!!!!! he’s soooo sketchy and he gets a redemption arc? but he’s so creepy i can’t like him sorry 😶
  • my OTP: kieran/simon oh my godddd ❣️❣️❣️
  • my NOTP: amy/philip didn’t he pay a sex worker to dress up as amy and rp as his gf?? was that fucked up or what
  • favorite episode: i havent watched in ages but I love when you see simon’s backstory and he has a smiths poster in his old bedroom i notice it every time 🙈 i love him. or maybe the ep when he & simon k*ss but really it’s any ep with simon EXCEPT the last of s2 that episode is PAIN
  • saddest death: AMY AT THE END OF S2 OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!! (also kieran committing suicide before the show even begins 😭 s1e1 has me fucked up when his family reunite with their dead son/brother)
  • favorite season: season two babey i love romance!
  • least favorite season: season one bc rick is a cunt
  • character that everyone else in the fandom loves, but i hate: um i feel like i don’t connect with amy as much as other people do? she’s still a sweetheart tho
  • my ‘you’re piece of trash, but you’re still a fave’ fave: jem!! that girl loves to make bad decisions!
  • my ‘beautiful cinnamon roll who deserves better than this’ fave:
  • my ‘this ship is wrong, nasty, and makes me want to cleanse my soul, but i still love it’ ship: don’t think i have one
  • my ‘they’re kind of cute, and i lowkey ship them, but i’m not too invested’ ship: dominic mitchell was going to give jem a gf and i was soo excited for that!

send me a show/movie/book!

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i’ve done permanent psychic damage to myself by watching the terror and in the flesh sequentially like twelve times

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