help i’m incapable of watching horror movies bc i’m a coward but you’ve posted about these scream 6 characters so much that now i am so interested in them. pls tell me about them if you want!!
oh you have just unlocked a MONSTERRJRDNDD HERE I GOO (spoilers for scream 6 will be included)
also sorry it took me so long to answer this i uh... had a lot to say
im gonna start with my faves THE TWINSS!! god i love them so bad okay so we have mindy whos a horror enthusiast/lesbian/stoner shes autistic AS HELL and was def born before chad cos he fr followers her around like a dog and takes notes when she talks (canon!) and chad is a himbo/jock whos just following the lead from the women in his life whether its his sister or the girl who used to babysit him and let him wear his favorite pokemon onesies and now is someone he would kill and die for or her lil sister whos just a lil loser hes smitten over fdkfjfk the twins are amazing their dynamic is classic lesbian/himbo solidarity (STOBIN TEAS) i just know growing up they would ask each other for girl advice and i KNOW mindy would do the opposite of what chad says cos look at how long it took him to make a move with tara jdfjkjkfjdf theyre an unkillable lesbian/bi duo and their mother is played by a lesbian icon theyre just!!!!!!!
and then theres the carpenters <3 first theres sam who’s suffered more than jesus himself. shes an older sister who just wants to take care of her sister and the kids she used to babysit cos all this terrible shit that happened to them is cos of her (in her mind!!) and then sometimes she hallucinates her dead serial killer dad who (to me) seems to represent the darkness in her while tara is the one who always seems to bring her out of that. their relationship was very strained after sam split and left tara with just their mom (who sounds like a fucking bitch!) so since coming back into each others lives theyve had to find a way to balance sam's overcompensating for being gone and trying to be glued to tara and tara adamantly trying to pretend nothing ever happened. but by the end of scre6m they seem to be on the same page and want to move forward together <3 tara is a lil sad wet cat who always just needs a fucking break!!! she has no interest in being part of some murder legacy shes just fed up and would like to have a lil fun take a load off!!! but ofc she cant so instead she has to start stabbing people like her big sis
they all mean sm to me THEY'RE A FAMILY THEY'RE UNSTOPPABLE I WOULD DIE FOR THEM. yeah i think that sums it up
3 notes
·
View notes
episode 3 script: PENISSTHRUSTING SHORTS
[transcript] dude… gay sex
TEXAS JESSE X TOY CHICA???
Texas Jesse needed some extra cash. Chewing on some wheat he picked down in texas, he looked in the newspaper for available jobs, looking for anything interesting.
"Freddy Fazbear's Pizza? Well back in 'ole texas my ma and pa used to cook colesaw for me on the daily... but i do like me pepperoni's when pa used to shoot old Bella the cow" He called the number and applied and guess what he got in
"Nah we got a texan???" Freddy fazbear employee #69 said dreadfully
"HOLLLLY SMOKES!!!!!!!! THOSE TITTIES AR SO HOTTT NGHHHH IM AISJDASOD AHAAAAAAA GLLPLPLP" ay" texas jessee immediately whipped out his shlong and startd 69ing himself as soon as he saw toy chica on camera
"dam this happens every time" toy chica sighed
"I mean im always down for some good shlong" toy chica the icon walked off into texas jesse's office and saw him sucking his own manhood
"awh are u fucking serious again" toy chica sighed and began racing over whipping out her 24inch cock and began thrusting into jesse vivaciously
"WOAH HOW COME U HAVE A PENIS??"jesse said
"BACK IN MY DAY WE DIDNT ALLOW U LIBERALS!!!!"
"not my fault i came with a shlong feature" toy chica stated as she whipped out 2 more shlongs "and theres more where that came from" as she slipped 69 manhoods inside texas jesse
"OH MY GOD THIS IS SO GAY PLEASE FORGIVE ME JESUS!!!"
"wait maybe i am gay"
"S-SO MUCH M-MANHOODS I'M GOING TO PROJECTILE CUM ALL OVER THE PLACE IT'LL BECOME WHITE" jesse moaned loud, one of the manhoods was in jesse's mouth and then jesse started sucking on it "is your name jesse?" Toy chica stated? "Yeah SSSSSLLLLLLLLUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRPPPPPPPPP!!!!!" jesse stated before SSSSSSSASLLLLLLLLURRRRRRRRPPPPP SO MUCH slurping I CANT EVEN TYPE WITHOUT SLURP "BACK IN MY DAY MY DAD SLURPED COLESLAW NOW WE SLURP MANHOO-SSSSSSLLLLLURRRRRRRRPPPLP AUGOOGOHOHOHOHOOWOWOWOW~" then jesse shows his shlong to toy chica and toy chica starts sucking on it
"is your name jesse?" Toy chica stated? "Yeah SSSSSLLLLLLLLUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRPPPPPPPPP!!!!!" jesse stated before SSSSSSSASLLLLLLLLURRRRRRRRPPPPP SO MUCH slurping I CANT EVEN TYPE WITHOUT SLURP "BACK IN MY DAY MY DAD SLURPED COLESLAW NOW WE SLURP MANHOO-SSSSSSLLLLLURRRRRRRRPPPLP AUGOOGOHOHOHOHOOWOWOWOW~" then jesse shows his shlong to toy chica and toy chica starts sucking on it SSSLSSLLLLLLURRRRRRRPP "I-I think i'm about to nut soon get ready" moaned jesse, jesse started blushing and sweating from all of that pleasure, then jesse went "I'M GOING TO C-CUM~"
Jesse screamed with pleasure one last time before letting all the cum from his microscopic penis explode into toy chicas mouth
Toy chica coughed as she took jesse manhood out of her mouth
jesus christ bros manhood is tiny goddam toy chica thought to herself
"aa-ahh.. again again!! pls destroy my insides with your 69 manhoods-" jesse moaned
"jesus christ ok homo" toy chica said, whipping out her manhoods once again
"Y-yes yes.. WAIT A MINUTE DID U JUST CALL ME GA-AUAUGHHH" jesse said, being interrupted by his own moaning after toy chica slammed her penis up his ass
this continued for the rest of the night, the sounds of jesses moaning scarred the rest of the toy animatronics for life
FREDDY FAZBEAR x PENISSTORM
Penisstorm goes up to freddy and goes "ARE YOU READY FOR CUM BLASTING?!?!" Freddy goes "oh yeah thats funz" PENISSTORM STARTS TOUCHING FREDDY'S FREDDYCHEEKS AND THEN STARTS FUCKING FREDDY "OH MY THATS DEEP~" "HARDER~" "SOME UNUSUAL ACTIVITIES HERE TO MY FAZBOOTYHOLE~" penisstorm thrusting in and out of freddy fazbear its so hot to look at
Freddy fazbear's massive manboobs and cumalicious weiner is bulging so hard rn and penisstorm begins stroking it so hard as freddy goes "DUR DUR DUR DUR DUR DUR DUR DUR DUR DUR!!!!" and that turns penisstorm on further leadiing him to let out hot purple cum and freddy fazbears robotic schlong churns out milk
"bro why would they add a penis to an animatronic for kids" penisstorm says breaking the 4th wall
"bro its a milk dispenser........................................................................................... ur so dirty minded werido"
freddy fazbear walks out of the office
"WAIT WHAT??? I THOUGHT U SAID CUM BLASTING??"
"STOP GASLIGHTING ME U LITERAL DICKHEAD!!!"
Penisstorm cries as he feels self consciousness spread over him
"Im not a penis head... am I??"
the penisstorm proceeded to look into the mirror, and thats when it realised that is was indeed, a penis head. Infact its entire body was a penis how the fuck did it not notice before.
It started dramatically sobbing due to freddys insult, then went to fuck its butt buddy (the witherstorm) for 1 week straight
ok that’s all. we should set up like a ko-fi or a patreon cuz these stories r fire 🔥 🔥🔥 -longshlong3000
0 notes
SEJUN PLAGIARIZE THIS I BEG YOU
8 notes
·
View notes
OKAY... OKAY I JUST FINISHED DELTARUNE CHAP 2 AND UM??????? UMMMM???????
4 notes
·
View notes
watching the 1963 LOTF movie for the first time: my reactions
lets go me!! i wanna watch but i cannot focus on JUST watching a movie and the minecraft server i usually play on is down, so i decided to write my reactions bc ive seen people do it for other movies and why not. also i wanna look back in the furture when i watch again bc why not. pls dont judge me. lets go team
-yo wtf is the choir so creepy when they sing like okay
- piggy is adorable and i’d kill for him
- music when they first arrive on shore: creepy, but that could just be cause i know its boutta go from 0-100 real quick
- we got our first suCKS TO YOUR ASSMAR
- PIGGY’S LAUGH IS SO CUTE IM LEGIT GONNA SOB WHEN HE DIES WTF
- Percival? so cute
- did jack fuckin make em sing as they approached? legend. icon. love the flex.
- i love how sad the choir kids all look. theyre all so fuckin done.
- god pls forgive me for laughing when Simon just fuckin collpased
- god simon is adorable
- imma cRY stop making fun of piggy
- jack just fuckng casually scratching his nose with his knife like okay flex again
- holY SHIT MAN HOW MEAN CAN U BE SIMON WAS LOOKING AT THAT
- stop attacking pigman i stg
- i, myself, as a hermit crab owner, am kinda sad :( leave them alone they are trying to be in sand
- im gonna cry simon is so cute with his lizard friend i love him sm
- could the plane not see the kids running on the island? maybe im wrong. idk
- i rly wanna hug ralph :( hes so upset about the fire
- yo the whole cult pig chant thing was creepy but when u hear actual kids say it? terrifying. no thanks.
- a+ acting piggy but alos i fuckin love u so its ok
- k fuck u jack. fuck u. also, simon’s voice is so sweet when hes like “here have ur specs” and he hands them over so nicely like God simon ur the best ur so valid sweetie
- jack that was a fake ass apology.
- u better bring em back ralph. he makes his tone a lot nicer with piggy than he does with jack which i appreciate
- ur slurping is fckin nasty. poor piggy. also thank god for simon which i have saud before many times, and will say again many times.
- get em ralph. call that assembly. they suck.
- god, percival is bby. imma pretend that hunter is maurice like in the book and thank the lord for him as well. finally, a hunter does something valid. way to go.
- is that my dumbass squid boy? i love him
- jack shut tf up and stop being mean to piggy challenge
- simon is so precious and whomever said “no” like that does it again imma beat ur ass wtf hes telling the truth. insert that jesus meme here, which applies in many ways.
- jack and ralph argue. again. wow whom the fuck knew. thats all they do jesus they just bicker forever. also, have i said fuck jack rights? because fuck jack rights. piggy has the funmkckin conch
- wow ralph sim n piggy are so valid. love em. cherish em.
- love samneric too, theyre adorable
- ralph is putting jack in his place again and again, whcih is very appreicated and thsank u ralph.
- simon i love u.
- ralph’s smile is orecious af
- no clue why they put the camberly thing in but glad they did bc more piggy content
- oh simon, i love u sm but honey u got a big storm comin
- cue more jack and ralph bickering. also, if i was ralph i would not fumckin climb a mountain with the verified psychopaths but i mean maybe thats just me
- ahhhh.... the corpse
- “boys armed with sticks” THERE WE GO RALPH THATS MY BOI
- i like how dramatic the scene is where jack dips
- siMON
- okay ummmmm lotf is creepy as shit thanks
- choir trying to be tight and kill pigs n shit then go back to singing practice? yeah right losers ur fuckin nerds
- simon pls just go back to ur lizard and ignore the pig pls
- i am not ready
- love how theres like a grand total of 6 people in ralphs tribe lmao
- go ralph!!! ur so valid sweetie
- ralph i stg... go home... ur vibes are rancid rn
- SIMON FUCJDJIN RUN NOW
- his screaming is so awful... it hurts my heart
- simons body drfiting out while the creepy choir song plays is so sad wtf especially with the glimmer or the creatures or whatever like its just sad
- piggy i love u but we BOTH know that was murder.
- as much as raph sucked for killing simon i wanna give hm a big hug
- mkkay accident? maybe, MAYBE i can get behind. but he was FUCKIN INNOCENT PIGGy
- okay fuck jack rights
- awe pigGY
- SIMON BUILT THAT SHELTER
- oh wow rock throwing
- lemme just say: respect ralph rights. hate him for killing simon but u can tell he respects piggy cause when hes yellin at the choir hes all mean but he is nice and tells piggy to wait cause he knows hes worried
- he even gives him the conch to make him feel better!
- FIUCK GET EM RALPH GOD I LOVE U UR SO VALID HUN
- DAMN RIGHT HE IS U TELL EM RALLPH
- u tell em piggy
- okay that was so uncool. who the fuck said that was ok
- OKAY THAT SHOT OF THE BODY BEING TAKEN AWAY WHILE RALPH WATCHES IS SO RUDE
- im sorry for laughing but ralph just seeing what happened and just dipping is so fucjncj funny
- sam and eric are such real ones and i appreciate them as well
- mmkay that cutfrom the coast guard to the island in flames is so funny
- poor percival
- ralph looks so upset. imma cry. like hes legit shking. not ok
aleight i did it. it wa sso sad. i think imma watch the 1990 movie another night cause ibe heard its funny af
ummmm tl;dr, i love simon, i love piggy except for after simons death, jacks a bitch and so i roger, and ralph is valid af. i didnt really see the characters that way in the book, like i imagined ralph was blonde and simon was nothing like that kid, no matter how cute he was. good movie tho!!!!
thats about it. if u read this idk why u did but thank u. if u wanna know where i watched just look up google drive lord of the flies and its there for free! ;000
19 notes
·
View notes
i can't see the numbers for the ask thing idk why LKLLFASLKMSAL so the first 5 and the last 5
I would be happy to answer all these for you bby asdfghjkl also I’m so sorry bby I tweaked my theme like last week and I don’t know how to bring back the numbers lololol ;;
1:Favorite EXO album?
Exodus would take the cake!! SM did a really great job hyping us up with all those teasers and all those pathcode shits and I clearly remember not wanting to sleep at all because WHAT IF I MISS ONE TEASER?? WHAT IF IT IS BAEK’S?? So just the entirety of that era was so so thrilling that when the actually dropped the album, it felt like finding a new religion!! Every song is the best song in the album I swear I screamed every time I played the next track. It certainly did not disappoint I’m still screaming ;;
2:Favorite title song?
It’s actually MAMA. I know I wasn’t in the fandom yet when they released this but I really get chills whenever this song plays on my playlist ;; and I scream when they perform it on concerts too THE METAL VERSION JESUS CHRIST I AM NOT ALIVE HOLY FFFFFFt I just really love MAMA so much.
3:Best Era?
That would be Call Me Baby Era for me. After what happened with the Overdose era I felt like CMB was exo’s statement of their rebirth. That theyre stronger now and that yes they’ve been through so much but they will still fight. I don’t know that era just held so much meaning for me and from then on, the boys have become much more comfortable and much more confident about themselves and their music so it makes me proud to see them grow every passing day.
4:Favorite b-side song?
Okay since it is impossible for me to pick just one, I would pick one from all their albums (applauds my brain) lololol
MAMA : What is Love
XOXO : Don’t Go (I still cry whenever I listen to this)
MID : My Turn To Cry
OVERDOSE : Thunder
EXODUS : El Dorado
SFY : Girl x Friend
EX’ACT : White Noise
FOR LIFE : Falling For You
5:Who’s your bias?
this cutie right here
96:Taohun or Taoris
taohun (pass me the tissues pls thank you)
97:EXO Showtime or EXO Next Door?
Definitely Showtime rapbyun anyone?? Showtime allowed us to get to know Exo more as individuals and it is where all our inside jokes came from. Truly #iconic. Also I still grieve for the sudden death of kkaebsong :((( Whenever I find traces of it these days I cry legit tears ;;
98:Most significant song for you?
Promise. It is a letter from EXO to us. These are the members’ sentiments and feelings relayed to us through a song. And if the way they all cried when they sang it to us on their comeback concert doesn’t tell you how heartfelt these lyrics are in their part, then I don’t know what will.
99:Who are your top 3 members?
already answered here bby~
100:Why do you like EXO?
Because they gave me happiness when I thought happiness was no where to be found. They gave me smiles when I thought smiling was only for those who deserves to smile. They taught me that we all may fall down, but we also must learn how to stand back up everytime we do. It is possible to reach your dreams if you try hard enough. They are my life’s greatest happiness and inspiration and to be honest they saved me in more ways than one so yeah I don’t just like them. I adore them and love them with every bit of my being and I will be here supporting them no matter what ;;
send me exo asks
7 notes
·
View notes
IT IS A HAPPY 17TH BIRTHDAY TO THE BEST GOAT
@fucshias @jiilys MY LOVE GOATY. MY MOST BEAUTIFUL GOAT. MY SUN. MY STARS. MY BEAUTIFUL HOOVED CREATURE OF GOD. I HAVE ARRIVED TO SAY SOME IMPORTANT THINGS BUT FIRSTLY I LOVE YOU I LOVE I LOVE YOU
U R READING THIS POST RIGHT NOW DUE TO A VERY IMPORTANT REASON AND THIS IMPORTANT REASON IS THAT
*CHOKES BACK TEARS*
IT IS UR BIRTHDAY.
*SCREAMING*
OK OKI DOKI BEFORE I START: I AM NOT ACTUALLY HERE BUT DO NOT BE D I S E N H E AR T E N E D BC I JUST DONT HAVE WIFI BUT I PROMISE U SOMEWHERE OUT THERE I AM SULKING AND FIGHTING A WALL AND ALSO SETTING OFF FIREWORKS BC !!!!!!!!!!!!! ITS UR FUCKING DAY AND IM SORRY I COULD NOT WISH U BUT I LOVE U SO SO SO SO SO SO SO MUCH I AM HERE W/ U IN SPIRIT
ALRIGHT ALRIGHT ALRIGHT TURN THE FUCK UP HAPPY FUCKING BIRTHDAY TO MY LOVE HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO U UR EXCELLENT AND I LOVE YOU AND ALSO WHAT THE FUCK BINCH HOW ARE U SEVENTEEN TODAY U ASSHOLE (COPYRIGHT U KNOW WHO) WHO ALLOWED U TO BE LIKE THIS AND ALSO I LOVE YOU. AND ALSO I CANT BELIEVE UVE DONE THIS. UR LITERALLY SEVENTEEN TODAY I AM NOT ALRIGHT AND I NEED U TO HOLD ME BECAUSE I AM GOING TO COME OVER AND FOR THE SOLE PURPOSE OF BEING A DRAMATIC BITCH I WILL FAINT IN UR ARMS I AM 100% NOT ALRIGHT
like,,,, HONESTLY u are so. fucking. great. WHERE DO I EVEN START.
FIRST AND FOREMOST I WANNA SAY I AM SO FUCKING EXCITED FOR THIS FOR UR BDAY I LOVE YOU GOATY I AM SO PUMPED THAT UR SO OLD ITS RIDICULOUS @ ME FUCK OFF ALRIGHT BUT. JUST. I LOVE I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU AND HAPPY BIRTHDAY U GOAT UR BEYOND INCREDIBLE
UR OFFICIALLY A DANCING QUEEN UR YOUNG AND SWEET. ONLY. *SMASHES OPEN MY WINDOW AT 12 MIDNIGHT* SEVENTEEEEEEEEEEEEEN
SO OH MY GOD. I AM CURRENTLY YELLING BECAUSE??????????? LIKE???????????????? YOU'RE SEVENTEEN??????? HOW DID WE EVEN COME TO THIS POINT ITS INSANE LIKE HOW THE FUCK ARE YOU SEVENTEEN WE'RE ALL JUST STILL TINY SMOLS WHERE ARE U GOING WHY ARE U GROWING OLDER STOP IT PLS ALRITE I DO NOT LIKE. MY PRECIOUS GOAT SUNSHINE WHO IS A PROFESSIONAL PAJAMA CONSULTANT A REAL SOLID BUSINESSWOMAN WHO DRIVES AND SHIT AND COULD PROBABLY RUN ME OVER AND IS 6'3 SO IF U WOULD SIT ON ME I WOULD MOST CERTAINLY DIE UR OFFICIALLY A DANCING QUEEN AND I AM CRYING
but in all seriousness I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU i am FOREVER AND EVER glad that i met u LIKE I FUCKIN HATE U GODMDAN FUCKIBG GOAT MAKING ME REBLOG THIGNS FUCK YUO FUCK O FF but like????? apart from that UR FUCKING BEYOND FABULOUS and i have decided to compile a list of reasons why u are unbelievably great and have earned ur title of being a dancing queen/brilliant goat/actual love of my life. bc u are excellent. AND IT MUST BE WRITTEN OUT HERE SOMEWHERE THAT I LOVE YOU.
OK OK OK SO HERE WE GO BINCHES. PREPARE URSELF. THIS IS GONNA BE SUPER LENGTHY BECAUSE I LOVE YOU A LOT AND I AM GONNA DO A 'ON THE JELLICOE ROAD' WORTHY REVIEW OF U BUT LIKE A SHITTIER VERSION SO U BETTER FUNKIN BUCKLE UP BITCH
LEZGO:
IS OBVIOSULY FABULOUS
IS A REAL LIFE GIRAFFE
WE ARE BLESSED TO HAVE ONE ROAM OUT OF CAPTIVITY LIKE............. WE ARE STRONGLY BLESSED
I CANNOT STRESS ENOUGH
CLAIMS TO HAVE 'barely any leg but a huge torso' and interpret this how u want bUT i just wanna say u r the most fucked up giraffe ever ok what the fuck WHO HURT YOU
apparently dis binch owns a bunny AND NEVER TOLD ME SHE DID
owns a problematic rabbit bc it pees everywhere
said problematic rabbit likes to pee everywhere so much its ridiculous it has no respect for the value of items of modern society and thus in my opinion should be sent to COURT
@ rabbit U NASTY OK PLS GET UR PRIORITIES SORTED???? THIS HAS BEEN A MOTHERFUCKING PSA THANK U (CAROLINE I AM TRUSTING YOU TO SHOW THIS ON UR PHONE TO THE GODDAMN BUNNY I NEED IT TO KNOW)
is 100% excellent at looking after drunk people ALRITE literally THIS WOMAN IS A SAINT who has saved REAL LIVES tbh where would that poor child from your old intermediate be if u hadn't SAVED HIS ENTIRE LIFE from all that tequila he would DEAD thats fuKCIN RIGHT U DESERVE ALL THE MEDALS A TRUE HERO AMONG NEW ZEALANDERS. A NATIONAL ICON. SO BRAVE I AM SO PROUD I LOVE YOU ALWAYS
AND ALSO PULLING DRUNK MAKING OUT PEOPLE OFF EACH OTHER I JUST WANT U TO KNOW THAT UR EFFORTS ARE SO VERY RECOGNIZED BECAUSE ONE TIME I DID THAT AND I GOT PUNCHED IN THE THROAT I THOUGHT I DIED BECAUSE I SAW JESUS BUT IT WASNT ACTUALLY JESUS IT WAS JUST A POSTER TAPED TO A FRIDGE I WAS SCAMMED
her own mum has called the police on her and was 100% ready for some quality fun family jailtime
ALSO ONE TIME GOATY ACCIDENTALLY FUCKED UP SOMEONES REAR MIRROR AND THE VICTIMS OF THE INCIDENT DID NOT GIVE HALF A FUCK HOWEVER, HER MOTHER GOATY REPORTED SEVERAL FUCKS TO THE POLICE AND FILED AN ACCIDENT REPORT AND THAT WAS THE DAY MY GOATY BECAME A DARK CRIMINAL
*OMINOUS MUSIC*
I AM STILL WAITING FOR THE DAY I WALK MY BUTT INTO COURT AGAINST UR MUM COVERED HEAD TO ASS IN $3 PLASTIC BRACELETS BACKED BY UR UNEXPECTEDLY KLEPTOMANIAC SISTER AND A BASKET OF STOLEN WOMANS DAYS AND ALONG WITH BLING BLING JIMMY WE WILL RESTORE THE RIGHTEOUSNESS AND LACK OF CONSCIENCE ON THIS LOVELY EARTH
ALRIGHT ALRIGHT ENOUGHT ABOUT UR MUM LIKE ACTUALLY ALL UR FAMILY MEMBERS ARE DIFFERENT LEVELS OF WILD AND..... I AM AFRAID
OK OK IT MUST BE SAID CAROLINE HAS THE MOST AMAIZNG VOICE ????? EVER
like i love her voice sm SO FUCKING MUCH I TELL U i have never heard anything like it and i want caroline to like read me books for hours AND HOURS AND NARRATE MY WHOLE ENTIRE LIFE because i love how unusually deep and shadowy her voice sounds like deep flowing river water or smth like i LOVE IT SO MUCH it. Is.So. Strange BUT I LOVE IT IT IS THE COOLEST GODDAMN THING THROW A BUCKET AT ME I LOVE YOU
HAS A VIDEO OF HERSELF DOING THE ICE BUCKET CHALLENGE AND I KNOW I HAVE PRAISED IT FOR TWO YEARS IN A ROW ALREADY LIKE @ ME PLZ CHILL BUT i will not i will NEVER it is solid entertainment a+++ QUALITY I AM LAUGHIGN IM LAUGHING I AM LAUGHING FOREVER those beautiful hops of pain across ur backyard ARE THE LAST THINGS I WANT TO SEE BEFORE GOD TAKES ME FROM THIS EARTH
WRONGFULLY FRAMED ME FOR HAVING SHIT DICK TENDENCIES AND THEN YELLED AT ME AND CALLED ME A GARAGE WHAT A BINCH I AM IN LOVE
loves yellow flowers AND ALL THE FLOWERS AND HEAVY ROSES AND IS A FULL OUT FLOWER HOE
IS DESPICABLE TEEN WOLF GARBAGE LIKE.... ive been scrolling through our fanmails AND MY HEART HUR T S G O A T Y hOld mE we were sO Y O U N G and like no lie i shit u not 80% oF THE FUCKING MESSAGES ARE U YELLING 'STYDIA IS GONNA HAPPEN THIS SEASON' AND 'OH MY GOD DID U SEE THAT STYDIA SCENE' AND DECLARATIONS OF LOVE FOR LYDIA MARTIN AND THE OTHER 20% IS U ASKIN ME IF IVE SEEN THE NEW TEEN WOLF I LOVE IT I LOVE YOU I AM SORRY TEEN WOLF KEEPS DISAPPOINTING US BOTH BUT STDYIA IS. DEFINIETELY. GONNA. HAPPEN. THIS. SEASON. IT HAS TO OR I WILL FUKIN FITE ALRIGHT GIVE US STYDIA OR GIVE US DEATH I LOVE UR TEEN WOLF LOVIBG ASS
anyway caroline is an utterly excellent person
if u were an ncea paper i would grade u with excellence
*FINGER GUNS*
like ?????deals with my stupid yelling ALL THE TIME
whenever i had a problem and went to my goaty she was so very understanding and patient AND DID NOT CALL ME A DUMBASS WHEN I DESERVED TO BE DECKED
TOLD ME THE TRU DEFINTION OF THE PHRASE 'SHOT'
TWO YEARS OF UTTER CONFUSION. ERASED FROM MY LIFE. PERMANENTLY.
MY SKIN?? CLEARED . MY FUTURE BILLS ??? PAID MY HUSBAND MARRIED MY STATUE FOR CAROLINE FULLY ERECTED
ok but like i can never say this enough goaty IS SO NICE TO TALK TO PLETAHE TALK TO ME FORVER SHE IS FABULOUS??? it blows my mind constantly that someone this incredible and special walks along this earth NONE OF US DESERVE THE GOAT
also ???? WHAT IN THE FUCK HOW HAVE I NOT MENTIONED THIS YET CAROLINE IS THE BEST WRITER I HAVE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE SHE IS SO TALENTED EVERY TIME I READ ONE OF HER FICS I END UP THINKING ABOUT IT AFTERWARDS FOR 958495894 YEARS ALRIGHT THEY FUCK ME UP THEY WAY SHE HANDLES WORDS FUCKS ME UP HOW CAN YOUT TAKE FUCKING LETTERS AND THEN SHOVE THEM UP MY ASS LIKE THIS I AM NOT ALRIGHT I AM NOT ALRIGHT I AM NOT ALRIGHT I am Not Strong Enough For This
i am not even kidding ok THE WAY U HANDLE WORDS IS IN.FUCKING.CREDIBLE whenever u use them its like?? u turned them into something precious and all your writing have this feel to it like as if im holding a delicate bouqet of a thousand yellow flowers like im holding a butterfly in my hands like im holding a box of eggs and i am scared shitless to drop it bC MY DAD WILL PERSONALLY CRUCIFY ME
I AM AWFUL AT DESCRIPTIONS BUT I HOPE U SEE WHAT I MEAN. LIKE. IT IS SO *SCREAMS* MINBLOWING DECK ME WITH ALL UR WORDS EVER
I AM ONE HUNDRED FUCKING PERCENT NEVER OKAY WITH ANYTHING YOU WRITE IT HURTS SO GOOD AND I LOVE IT
ok ok this hoe right here has written THREE fics with a dedication for me at the beginning and like.............. ..... do u ever just cri
i have 'the glorious everywhere' printed out and FUCKING PINNED TO MY WALL WHERE I CAN SEE IT FROM ALL CORNERS OF MY ROOM ALWAYS back in my apartment in russia like it is legitimately the best thing. i love everything about this piece it should be adapted into a novel or a short film like PULL SOME FIFTY SHADES OF GREY SHIT W/ IT OK the imagery and REALNESS of this fic gets to me all the time and im crying im crying im crying I ABSOLUTELY ADORE IT PLS @ CAROLINE WHY ARE U SO TALENT
ALRIGHT ALRIGHT ALRIGHT LOOK AT THIS BULLSHIT FUCKIG I THINK ABOUT THIS FIC EVERY SINGLE DAY WHEN I WAKE UP FUCKING LOOK ' You see her hair dripping down her head and spinning out over the seats in the back and lighting them on fire. You see her pale skin and electric veins as she puts her hand out the window and tries to catch the sky and stuff it up her sleeve. You hear her voice, “Just drive James, you’ll know where we’re going when we get there.”
REALLY I AM NOT FUCKIGN Okay CALL AN AMBULANCE CALL IT NOW I AM UNWELL I AM SICK I AM DYING FUK ME RITE UP
i am fully convinced this is the greatest thing thats ever been written.like. How. the. FUCK. tbh i want this paragraph ENTIRELY TATTOOED ON MY ASS I AM ZCRYING @ CAROLINE YOU HAVE THE MOST BEAUTIFUL BRAIN AND I AM SO VERY GLAD THAT IT EXISTS
i will not go into depth abt yelling about ur fics bc tbh i think u Know but I JUST WANNA SAY 'oh darling i have coloured blood (that i stole from you)' is the most iconic piece of literature to this day ever the and i zcri all the time because you are a goddamn bloody genius and you shine in colours beyond my comprehension and i love you so so so incredibly much
MY LOVE IS SO FUCKING TALENTED I AM YELLING I AM YELLING I AM YELLING
DOESN'T EAT FRIED SPERM
writes the BEST emails in history
UR SO LOVELY U GIVE ME SO MANY BEAUTIFUL SPELLING ERRORS FOR ME TO WHOLEHEARTEDLY ENJOY I AM GIGGLING *GIGGLES* IT BRINGS ME SO MUCH JOY WHEN U FUCK THINGS UP
tbh it is how fried chair came to life like it was actually in one of your first fanmails to me u said that two years ago and to this day it remains the Most Iconic Thing Ever
STRONG SUPPORTER OF WEETBIX
LOVES WEETBIX
FOUGHT TIGERS AND LIONS FOR HER FAMILY AND WAS SAVED BY WEETBIX AND WEETBIX ALONE
ACTUALLY HAD A THING CALLED ‘WEETBIX DISCOURSE’ ON HER BLOG LIKE IT WAS ACTUALLY A THING THAT HAPPENED A REAL THING THAT OCCURED AND WAS PASSIONATELY ARGUED ABOUT AND I HAVE SEEN THINGS THAT CANNOT BE UNSEEN
RIGHTFULLY SO BC WEETBIX >>>>> JONAH GRIGGS I AM SORRY IT IS THE RULES
FUCK THE H8RS
like ??? is hilarious af QUEEN OF HUMOUR AND MAKING ME SNORT MY GODDAMN CHOCLATE MILK LIKE CAN U NOT BE SO EXCEPTIONAL U HO HAVE SOME CONSIDERATION U LIL BITCH but YES a++ top notch QUALITY storytelling skills in both fic writing and tequila struggles I APPRECIATE IT TO DEATH
ok ok ok also the most beautiful person ever??? LIKE ???????????????? BITCH WHAT THE FUCK ??????????????????????????????????????????????? WHO ALLOWED U
THE MOST PERFECT HAIR. ur hair is like waves of a golden ocean cascading from ur hEAD AND IT IS SO MAGICALLY FITTING B/C U R AN ETHEREAL BEING AND THE FACT THAT U HAVE AN ENTIRE WILD SEA RAGING ON UR HEAD JUST PROVES TO ME THAT U ARE A GOD AMONG MORTALS. UR HAIR IS SO PRETTY OK OK OKAY FUCK ME UP. STRAIGHT UP GORGEOUS. SO SOFT TOO AND SO SHINY AND IT FITS U SO WELL I AM FOREVER SCREAMING
THE MOST ANGEL FACE. GOATYS FACE LOOKS LIKE GOD OR WHOEVER THE FUCK WAS RESPONSIBLE CARVED IT OUT OF ROSE PETALS AND MARBLE LIKE. IT. IS. TRULY. THE MOST GORGEOUS THING ur face is softer than clouds tbh AND UR SMILE SAVES MY LIFE ITS BRIGHTER THAN THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE CONDENSED AND SOMETIMES WHEN I SEE UR SELFIES I HAVE TO GO GET LASER EYE SURGERY BECAUSE I HAVE BEEN B L I N D E D
U R SO UNCONSIDERATE TO MY FRAGILE HEALTH HOW DARE YOU
SO. GODDAMN GORGEOUS SLAY MY ENTIRE LIFE I BEG U ID PAY U TO SIT ON ME WITH UR HUGE BONES AND SLOWLY CRUSH ME INTO AN ENDLESS DEATH I HAVE $4 LEFT OVER FROM MY LIFE SAVINGS DO IT BAE
has the best taste in music omg WHAT A BLESSING WE LIKE THE SAME SONGS AND IT ACTUALLY KIND OF SCARES ME B/C IT FEELS LIKE WE ARE THE SAME PERSON AND THIS DOES NOT HELP MY CONSTANT STATE OF EXISTENTIAL CRISIS
HAS THE BEST TASTE IN BOOKS and adores skam as much as i do AND LOVES CHRIS/EVA AS MUCH AS IDO AND WROTE A FIC FOR THEM AND THE SNIPPET FROM IT ????? MY SOUL. GONE.
so tol and will never stop accusing me of being smol but listen up aight. imma FUCK YOU UP. REAL GOOD. ONE DAY. WHEN I CAN AFFORD TO BUY A LADDER. UNTIL THEN SLEEP WITH ONE EYE OPEN BINCH BC I AM COMING TO GET U
and is also the smartiest smart to ever smart LOOK AT MY U GO WITH UR EXCELLENCE ENDORSEMENT when i buy that ladder I WILL CLIMB IT AND HOVER AROUND UR HEAD LOTS SO I CAN ABSORB UR POWERS AND ALSO BREATHE THE FRESH AIR UP THERE WHICH IS NOT AVAILABLE TO GROUNDED PEASANTS SUCH AS ME
AND IS THE BEST COOKIE THE LOVE OF MY LIFE LIKE IF THIS ISNT ENOUGH TO CONVINCE ANYONE THAT CAROLINE IS BEYOND EXCEPTIONAL FOR OUR GALAXY THEN THEY CAN FUCK OFF PLS OK
like honestly,,, MY LOVE I COULD GO ON FOR YEARS AND YEARS AND CENTURIES UNTIL MY TEETH FALL OUT AND I GROW SENILE WITH MY LOVE BUT THE POINT OF THIS HOT STEAMING LAME MESS IS THAT I LOVE YOU TO BLOODY PIECES UR SO F U C K I N G INCREDIBLE I AM SO GLAD I MET YOU AND THAT YOU TAlk TO ME AND WE EMAIL EACH OTHER AND I AM BLESSED THAT YOU EVEN THINK OF ME AND THAT FREID CHAIR LOVES ME AND THAT U R MY GOAT BC UR MY ONLY GOAT AND UR THE BEST ONE THERE IS NO SHADE @ ALL OTHER GOATS BUT LIKE. IM SORRY I CANNOT TELL A LIE
IT IS THE COLD HARD TRUTH.
and like??? i did a /search/deadgwen ON @jiilys BC I WANTED TO LOOK AT ALL OUR OLD STUFFS FROM 2015 and I Regret it I Regret it So Much theres a selfie from like when i was 14 and an idiot still on Ur blog and I look like an actual tragedy I Want to Die we have known each other for so long its RIDICULOUS UR STILL AS AMAZING AS U WERE BACK THEN AND I AM MORE OR LESS CURED OF MY CONDITION OF BEING AN EMBARASSING DIPSHIT AND ITS CRAZY HOW MUCH YOUNGER WE WERE THEN LIKE UM WTF BUT UR STILL AS BEAUTIFUL AND 9384930X TIMES MORE AND I STILL LOVE U BC UR PERFECT AS EVER AND THAT IS WHAT MATTERS
NOW. I WAS GONNA MAKE YOU A PRESENT LIKE I REALLY DID BAE I TRIED SO MUCH SHIT ITS HORRIBLE BC LIKE ??? I WANTED TO MAKE YOU A PRESENTATION ON UR GOAT SUPERIORTY LIKE I DID LAST YEAR EXCEPT Like i am a fucking asshole™(COPYRIGHT JONAH GRIGGS THE MAN TEH MYTH THE LEGEND) who cannot do shit FOR SHIT it turned out so Awful and i cANNOT GRAPHIC BABE I TRIED TO MAKE YOU THIS EDIT AND THEN I REALIZED IT WAS Bad AND FOUGHT MYSELF FOR SIX HOURS AND I CANNOT WRITE AND YOU DESERVE ALL THE GIFTS EVER BUT I AM TRULY AWFUL
*ZCRIES*
I KNOW IM LAME AND MY ONLY TALENT IS YELLING FOR HOURS ON END I WISH I COULD HAVE MADE YOU SOMETHING REALLY COOL BC ITS UR SEVENTEETH AND 17 IS THE BEST NUMBER AND UR LOVELY AND I LOVE YOU SO PLEASE FORGIVE ME BAE FOR BEING AN ACTUAL GARAGE ASSHOLE (COPYRIGHT JONAH GRIGGS THE EXPERIENCE) SHIT DICK 100% TERRIBLE DICKFLUTE OKAY I LOVE YOU AND I CAN NEVER IMAGINE WHAT I WOULD BE WITHOUT YOU IN MY LIFE AND I HOPE YOU HAVE A REALLY REALLY REALLY GOOD YEAR LIKE FUCK SHIT UP BAE UR GONNA BE IN YEAR 13 ITS ALL GONNA BE SO AWFUL AND WE WILL ALL DIE aND WERE SO O L D JESUS CHRIST IF HEART ATTACKS DONT TAKE US OUT NCEA LEVEL 3 WILL BUT I HOPE THIS WILL BE A SUPER GOOD YEAR FOR U IN REGARDS OF EVERYTHING BECAUSE U DESERVE IT U DESERVE IT U DESERVE IT I HOPE THINGS WILL LEAD UP TO U GETTING THAT APARTMENT IN NEW YORK AND ALL THE HIGH HEELS THAT U WILL WEAR AND ALL THE YELLOW FLOWERS THAT U WILL BUY AND UR CAREER AS A LIFECHANGING LITERARY GENIUS OK OK I LOVE YOU HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABE
ok ok ok but.
ONE MORE THING.
LISTEN.
THE FUCKING
*CLECNHES JAW*
REBLOG FIASCO
*FLINGS MY ASS INTO THE SUN*
WHEN IT IS GOOD AND DAYLIGHT. U HAVE UNTIL THEN. LIKE I KNOW THIS IS UR BIRTHDAY WISH AND I LOVE YOU BUT FUCK OFF HWO COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME I FUCKING TRUSTED YOU I FUCKING FUCK JUST FUCK YOU FUCKING DICK i will RIOT
OKAY BABE ITS MIDNIGHT AND ILL BE UP IN ABOUT SIX HOURS AND LIKE. ANYTHING. ANYTHING ELSE FOR UR BIRTHDAY WISH OK BABE IM GONNA FUCKING DIE THIS IS IT THIS THE END I WILL GO DOWN SWEARING PROFUSELY WITH A HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE AND U WILL BE WATCHING AND LAUGHI G ANF @OFFICALTALL FUCK YU FUCKDUCKUD CUDCKUD DNUSJNDJF FUCK U @GOATY FUCK. UFCN WHERE IS UR HOOF WHY ARE U NOT FEELIN THE TEMPERATURE ITS EBOLA ITS GOATBOLA I WONT MAKE IT UNTIL DAWN I WONT SEE THE SUNLIGHT GOATY I CANT *FAKE CRYING SOUNDS* I WILL DIE. IT WILL HAPPEN. AND I WANT IT TO BE KNOWN THAT U ARE THE BITCH THAT KILLED ME. *MORE FAKE ZCRYING SOUNDS* I MUST SEND MESSAGES TO ALL MY DEAREST KIND FRIENDS WHO HAVE NEVER FUCKED ME LIKE THIS ALRIGHT *FAKE COUGHING* TELL THEM THAT I *MORE FAKE COUGHOGN* LOVE THEM *THROWS KETCHUP PACKET EVERYWHERE WHILE UR NOT LOOKING AND BUSY BEING WORRIED ABOUT MY HEALTH* AND I WILL REMEMBER THEM EVEN IN DEATH
ANYWAY HERE IS MY WILL:
WHAT U GET:
nothing
u get nothing
bINCH
zero. zip. nada
0 potato 4 u
U CAN HAVE THE SALT FROM MY KITCHEN SO U WILL BE PERPETUALLY REMINDED OF MY LAST EMOTIONS TOWARDS THIS LIFE
maybe like the one half a potato that was randomly in my drIVEWAY THAT ONE TIME
M A Y B E
WHAT GOOD KIND LOVING FRIENDS, SUCH AS MILS AND FRIED CHAIR AND ELLIE AND OTHER ASSORTED PEOPLES WHICH I SHALL ADDRESS IN CLAUSE 4.20 OF THE TERMS AND CONDITIONS OF MY WILL, GET:
actually mils is a hoe and can choke but u r the evil here rn aND FOR THE PURPOSES OF THIS ARGUMENT WE WILL PRETEND THAT I LIKE MILS
ANYWAY. REALLY GOOD THINGS I OWN
I HAVE SOME SOCKS I DONT WANT U GUYS CAN HAVE THEM
AND LIKE
MY DUVET
SEE GOATY THESE ARE THE KIND OF HEART TOUCHING POST DEATH GIFTS U MISS OUT ON WHEN U MURDER ME IN COLD BLOOD
ALSO NO TOUCHING MY MANGOES THAT I BOUGHT TWO DAYS AGO BECAUSE I STILL WANT TO EAT THEM AND IF ANYONE EVEN BREATHES IN THEIR GENERAL DIRECTION I WILL BEAT THEM UNCONSCIOUS WITH A TELEPHONE THIS IS A T H R E A T
I HOPE UR TAKING NOTES AND I HOPE U FEEL GOOD ABOUT BEING A 6′3 KILLER BECAUSE UR AN ASSHOLE ™LIKE UR ASSHOLIER™ THAN THE REAL ASSHOLE THAT IS JONAH GRIGGS™ THE LABEL™ (COPYRIGHT JONAH GRIGGS™ THE ANT MURDERING HOT PIECE OF ASS™) BUT I WILL DIE FOR U MY GOAT *strokes ur pretty face* BC IT IS UR BIRTHDAY WISH FOR ME TO SUFFER AND I LOVE YOU AND I WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR U THEREFORE . DESPITE THIS SICKNESS *FLAILS* I. WILL. BE. BRAVE. I WILL REBLOG THOSE TWENTY POSTS I WILL FLATLINE BY THE THIRD POST AND MY BLOOD WILL BE ON UR HANDS *CAREFULLY ARRANGES MY STUNT GOAT IN POSITION* AND I WILL BE YELLING CURSES AT YOU IN THE TAGS BUT I WILL DIE IN THE NAME OF HONOUR I WILL GO DOWN AS A GOAT NEVER HAS BEFORE
BUT LIKE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE YOU AND I I LOVE YOU AND I LOVE YOU AND I LOVE YOU AND I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU SO SO SO SO SO SO SO MUCH YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY FANTASTIC I AM SO HAPPY U EXIST. HAVE THE BOMBEST ASS 17TH BIRTHDAY BABE I HOPE UR PARTY IS LIT AND HAVE FUN GETTING DRUNK AND HAVING ALL THE BANTS AND LAFFS AND ALSO I WILL SEND U THE AWAITED EMAIL IN A FEW HOURS WHEN MY INTERENT IS BACK ON BECAUSE IT IS A CONTINUATION OF THIS BULLSHIT WITH SOME STRUCTURED DISCUSSION AKA WHAT THE FUCK DO U HAVE AGAINST SMIRNOFF ICE how is it not HARDCORE enough for u IT IS LITERALLY FLAVOURED VODKA DOES IT NOT KNOCK OUT UR 6′3 ASS OR WHAT EXCUSE ME
ANYWAY IN CONCLUSION.
HAPPY. SEVENTEENTH. BIRTHDAY. MY. CHUM.
*BLOWS U A KISS*
*PUTS ON TWO FÜR COATS TO REMAIN UNDETECTED*
*STEALS ALL UR WEETBIX AND RUNS AWAY TO ALASKA NEVER TO BE SEEN AGAIN*
*still replies ur emails tho cuz i love u bitch y u do dis to me*
12 notes
·
View notes
Episode #11: “I Love a Good Heist” ~ Will
It fucking worked and I want to redact everything bad I just said.
i'm none of them saying anything to me yet and I'm also me not seeing this coming when Will was all of a sudden not in favor of the telling duncan to idol plan lmaoooo gg
is no one going to message me!! i am so freaking upset right now and i kinda just want to explode but really no one is going to try to justify themselves to me, i'm a little disappointed tbh and i got to learn how to win a fucking immunity for once
AMANDA AND HER MOTHER ARE ICONS
I JUST GOT MY SECOND IDOL, I DO NOT DESERVE THIS
I'm so mad right now I want to SCREAM, why the HECK did I get that many votes, something isn't adding up and I'm just so frustrated.
Also who made me the glee parchment, if you're reading this TELL ME it was the only thing good about tonight I am really just SO DONE WITH ALL THESE SNAKES. I'm being so extra right now but these people make me want to throw my laptop into the road.
Cameron told Emily to vote Duncan :) We love a snake within our alliance :) I love a good heist :)
emily is a queen again btw, I love her
i don't know why i'm so salty
HOLY CRAP WE DID THAT!
Duncan didn't play his idol and I'm literally crying. We killed one of the biggest threats in the game. And I was behind it.
What. the. fuck.
fskhjf god
the lady at the dining hall asked me how i was and on the outside i was like "good" but on the inside im like "playing virtual editions ofr trash reality shows on the internet with strangers I have never met has left me feeling like i want to cry bc ppl lied to me have u ever been lied to how did u get over it and also can i please have some chicken nuggets" jesus and then someone talked to me and i didnt know how to respond bc i was having an EPISODE in the dining hall it's fine this is fine
________________________________________________________________
let the ass kissing begin
I'm gonna confess tomorrow, but I have become aware.... of some shady stuff, and am now in a really good spot... or at least I think I am
OH MY GAWD NO IDOL PLAY. ARE YOU MCFUCKIN KIDDING ME!?
I dont want to say that I am large in part why Duncan is @ Ponderosa right now BUT WIG WOW IS THIS THE BIGGEST MOVE IVE EVER MADE IN A GAME OR WHAT.
ALSO i'm here for weasel discourse:
[1/11/18, 10:48:07 PM] Dana Barry: because clearly we both bein sneaky weasels
[1/11/18, 10:48:54 PM] Owen (Crossroads Host): kfashj who the bigger weasel
[1/11/18, 10:49:01 PM] Dana Barry: OWEN PLEASE
[1/11/18, 10:49:12 PM] Dana Barry: LETS NOT COMPARE WEASEL SIZES
[1/11/18, 10:49:15 PM] Owen (Crossroads Host): OMFG
[1/11/18, 11:12:14 PM] Owen (Crossroads Host): I’m gonna go eat now I’ll be back later
[1/11/18, 11:31:53 PM] Dana Barry: pls eat my weasel friend
________________________________________________________________
https://vine.co/v/hWVwWE6UFqa/embed/simple
Me when the people of this game give my dumb ass power and I crave more because I'm a goblin.
This was recorded before the vote im SORRY im a flop
It's time to strike at Owen.
He's onto us. We're making big moves left and right, and he knows that we're going to get targeted as threats soon if we're not careful. He said we have to get rid of Ruthie and Kevin, otherwise people are going to start thinking about taking them to the end.
Of course, that's my plan. I think I want to sit with Ruthie and Ali/Dana at the end. Will, Emily, or Owen would surely beat me. I'm here, masterminding moves, deciding whether or not someone easy goes home, and someone is going to target me soon. My idol can only save me for one round, and I need to make sure it's a good one.
Lily was a good move.
Duncan was a better move.
Owen could potentially be the best move. Then I know my core four is completely loyal to me and only me. This is my ideal boot list now:
Owen (10th)
Ashvika (9th)
Kevin (8th)
Zach (7th)
Emily (6th)
Will (5th)
Dana (4th)
And then a final three of Ruthie (3rd), Ali (2nd), and myself (1st!)
That's all. Love you. It's time for me to go focus on winning again.
Boy I'm mad. Duncan was the one person who I could put some trust in--and even then there wasn't much--and now he's dead. Now I feel like my game's already gone through the gutter and there's no hope left. Shoutout to Ali and Cameron specifically for both telling me "Oh yeah I'm sorry for not keeping you in the loop at the first vote, I promise I'll do it this time?" Then, what did they do? Not that. I'm...mediocrely okay with Ali because like Ali's nice and a sweetheart (actually I'm kinda mad at Ali because I pm'd him asking what happened like immediately after tribal and he never responded even though he's talked multiple times in the tribe chat...wig). But Cameron??? This is the third time. We've voted together once, at the Madison tribal, even though you've told me multiple times you want to work with me. I was okay with being 'left in the dark' with the Lily vote because I wasn't actually in the dark. I feel like this was a chance for him to prove his word to me, that you do want to work with me. This was the chance to make or break my trust. And both times I've come to him before the vote and he's basically said 'oh yeah it's still this way like we said haha.' And then??? It isn't lmao. Like if you don't want to work with me, cool! I understand that the game rolls out that way! But don't come to me with fake promises then, saying you want to work with me, only to actually vote with me 3/4 times. At some point no amount of apologies will make up for your actions. I don't know if I've reached that breaking point, but it's getting close.
I get that I started the merge on the wrong foot, and that I should've voted Lily instead and sticking with Ruthie was a mistake. I know I got myself into this mess but I'm just annoyed and frustrated. I've been perfectly honest with everyone about who I'm voting for each round, and I get silence and vague responses in return.
If I feel mad enough tomorrow I might try going for Cameron since he has an idol. Or at least like throwing his name around and spilling that fact. But who knows who knows he has an idol though. If it works, it works. If it doesn't, I might get home which I honestly wouldn't be super upset at this point and I would get to be a bitter juror too!
I love Dana
I am an Owen stan again too, I love him. I need to confess more, because it might be big move season this round, but I also don't knowwwwwww. AHH, I hate this yikes.
I just get scared by Dana/Will/Cameron as a grouping, with Zach and Ruthie is already 5, which is scary
i have realized i'm quite irrelevant in this game and basically out of the loop without duncan because all these supposed idols that everyone has keep popping up left and right. i feel like my time is coming soon
"Who do you trust the least"
"Who is most likely to flip on their alliance"
"Who is ruining their own game"
"Who is at the bottom but doesn't know it"
"Who is going to go home for being the biggest threat"
"Who is going to be blindsided by their alliance"
literally they wish they were as relevant as me huh
________________________________________________________________
Actually though, I am going to make sure every one of these comes true. Let's see here....
"Who do you trust the least"
"Who is most likely to flip on their alliance"
"Who is ruining their own game"
"Who is at the bottom but doesn't know it"
"Who is going to go home for being the biggest threat"
"Who is going to be blindsided by their alliance"
Flipping on my alliance? Easy. If they insist, that's what I'll do. I will reallllly make it clear that they were right in trusting me the least :) And! They'd better hope! They take me out! For being a "threat" because if they do NOT, I am going to make sure each and everyone one of them is GONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! They better not feel comfortable for even one second bc if there's one good thing to come out of this, it's that I no longer feel comfortable at all and hopefully me playing on edge will end up better for me.
I just had an hour long call with Ali and we basically like....discussed everything. I don't know if I can trust him, but I sure as hell can't trust my alliance to take me to the end, so what have I got to lose? I told him I know about his idol, which I think was a move to hopefully get him to open up to me. And he told me that the merge idol has been taken from the shore. I'm assuming Emily, Ashvika, Cameron, or Ruthie have it bc they searched there before Ali. Ashvika I straight up asked and she said no.... I have a bad feeling Cameron is sitting on two idols rn and I don't know if I can handle it. But I was like.... idk I said a lot of things to Ali and I meant them. He said he felt like he didnt have a number one, and I told him we could be there for each other. He has a spot in my final three now whether he believes it or not and I would gladly sit at the end with him at this point. But we need numbers and we need a play. It feels so soon to try to flip on will dana Cameron but like..... If we wait until next vote to idol someone out, and Ruthie/Zach are glued to them, then at final 8 it would be four on each side (assuming I can get emily and ashvika to be with ali and I, and Kevin leaves at 10 which idek if it is happening). So that makes me think like....okay so maybe a move needs to happen at 10 that puts Kevin, Emily, Ali, Ashvika and I in a majority? But it's so fricking risky bc idk if they're going to come after me or come after Kevin or Emily or....idk. It's going to be rough as hell. But I'm ready. I don't know if I'm going to win this season, but I sure am going to try my hardest to change it.
________________________________________________________________
(On the other hand I love Dana, Wil, Cameron, and Zach as people so idk I'm stressin mad rn.)
Here's my long confessional like always explaining the events of last round and then the progress for this current round.
So last round was just a mess. I brought up to Dana the night of immunity results (congrats Will you freak) that Duncan is a threat. He has an immunity idol and a hideout advantage, if we don't do it at 11, he'll be free till technically final 8 without being targeted. In addition, it limits our options down the line. Dana agreed and said it wasn't bad, and ended up running to people with this idea without crediting me. Grrr. It's fine.
Dana, Will, Cameron all excluded Owen in this plan and I believe think they orchestrated it themselves when in reality it was kind of my idea but they pushed it forward so it's whatever. I called Emily in panic because I didn't want to exclude her and little do I know that Cameron already informed her of the decision before I finalized mine. In the end, Duncan leaves 8-3.
Post-vote, I am trying to reestablish any trust I have with Ashvika. I can sense she doesn't trust me which is completely reasonable and fine, but I am wanting to work with her. Kevin is irrelevant but I want to talk to him and form a good connection with him.
Now, this vote.
Cameron was my target. Will talked about how he wanted Cameron out to Dana who obviously relayed that information to me, and I think Owen was fine with doing it too. I am also trying to formulate connections with Owen despite the fact that he knows I blatantly lied about the Duncan vote and all. However, Cameron won immunity, so good job to him. This means that my target probably shifts to one of two people.
First is Kevin. He's kind of an easy vote, a person who wasn't really around and is definitely the most inactive. If we need an easy tribal, it's him. Ruthie's another easy vote but right now is not her time and I genuinely love her, but I do enjoy everyone so I can't use that. I'm not sure how likely this option is. I think I could get it rolling if need be.
My second is Ali. This is just because recently i've felt really distant with him. I think I can trust him, yeah, but from what I know Owen is fine with him leaving and it's like... yeah. I think Ali should go relatively soon. If the votes are on him i'm most definitely going to vote him out unless i'm frightened of an idol play.
I am honestly kind of scared of the alliance consisting of Cameron/Will/Owen/Dana + Ali. It's like... they're turning on each other briefly. Cameron is rubbing people the wrong way, which I love him and all truthfully, but he is kind of aggressive with dominating votes and spearheading decisions, which I think is ending up biting him in the ass. I truly think he'll be one of the next couple of votes. Ali is like the alliance's +1 so if they can vote him out, i'm down with that too. Ashvika, Emily, Ruthie, and Kevin are kind of on the outs of that alliance (with me of course) but more distant than myself. I need to utilize those bonds to kind of renege the major alliance cause I don't feel like being cut near the end. No ma'am.
So having Ali leave this vote, then Cameron next vote, followed by Kevin leaves a final 7 of Ashvika/Ruthie/Owen/Zach/Dana/Will/Emily. In this scenario it's like... it gets hard. I want to work with Emily, but there are so many people here that are such strong contenders. Owen, Dana, Will and Emily are all phenomenal players, and i'd love to consider myself amongst those people too (PARTICULARLY IN THIS GAME! NOTICE THAT I LOVE THEM ALL AND THINK THEY'RE ALL GREAT BUT IN THIS SPECIFIC GAME THAT'S MY VIEW ON STANDINGS). I don't want to be goated, which I potentially could be since i'm acting weird and dull this game, so maybe I could swap Kevin in the final seven and drop another big threat, like Ashvika or Owen.
The people who I trust the most right now are Dana and Emily. I trust Owen to an extent, and I really like talking to him. Ashvika and Kevin and Ruthie are just meh, I don't trust them. Cameron is to a degree but he's sketchy. Will is just... ugh MSDGLKDSG I love him I think he's so funny but he probably hates me. Ali is trustworthy but I feel like that's relative amongst all.
I really don't know who i'd like to sit against in the final three (or two but likely three). I've reached my goal of jury and 100 days so i'm content, but I want to win. I think my best chances would be against Ruthie and Kevin, but I don't know. Dana needs to go soon too. Like, maybe final 4-7 is when i'd love to see her leave because I bet everyone views me as her bitch and sure, I kind of am at the moment, but that's partially strategy. Everyone thinks i'm her +1 so to those that like her, i'm safe. They know they can use me. Then to others, i'm the weaker of the two and therefore they have no valid reason to target me unless they want to weaken her, in which case bye bye.
This game is so complicated and votes are NEVER decided until last minute which is bothersome but kind of fun. I think I have a high chance of leaving at this upcoming tribal truly, or at least receiving votes, so i'm excited to see what's to come. Hopefully i'm still here but if now, it's been a great season and i'm glad I got the chance to return and hopefully make y'alls slightly proud wooh!
Okay lots to confess I wish I confessed earlier in the round so I wouldn't have so much to recount.
So anyways, the Duncan vote happens, and it still makes me sad. I will never understand why he felt so betrayed by me and kinda continued to throw my name out there because I wanted to go far with him.
Also I called with Emily after the vote and I already knew at this point she leaked me idol (which Emily *why*). I dont understand why everyone felt so betrayed by me, when I was trying to loop everyone in? It doesn't make any sense. Anyway, I called with her and we seem good again, and I do want to work with her moving forwards.
________________________________________________________________
I spoke with Ashvika and explained why I voted Duncan, and I think she is the person I wanna work with most now, like Id love to go far with her, because I am an Ashvika stan.
Touchy Subjects was very interesting, Will guessed me for a lot of the negative game ones which suggests he doesn't have much faith in my game and I got who does everything think has an idol, blind to manipulation, who is gonna need to be apologised to, who is getting blindsided. Lots of very scary ones.
So... I'm nervous. I'm also nervous becuase I called with Owen yesterday, and as normal, I said waaay too much to Owen, and while I wanna work with him going forwards, I also think he could easily say what I said to LWD and get me out.
ALSO IN OTHER MC'FREAKIN NEWS:
I HAVE ANOTHER IDOL. AND NOBODY IS EVER FINDING OUT.
I am using the fact that everyone says I leak stuff (because I do) and "leaking" that shore 23 is empty, so that nobody thinks I have it. I wanna use the other idol soon, so nobody thinks I have one teehee
Okay the gag is Duncan and I apparently got found out or were suspected or something so congrats to them for sleuthing successfully but also according to Ali people thought Ashvika and I were close??? Which??? Isn't true??? I hardly even know her??? sjlks
Anyways I love these Touchy Subjects answers they make me feel really good about myself. I basically threw the challenge because I didn't feel like I had a good chance of winning anyway, and I'm not really in the position to offend anyone lmao which is evident by the answers. Apparently people trust me the least even tho...I've told pretty much everyone who I'm voting for in the last round. On an exciting note people want to vote for me tonight! At this point just take me out of the game and catapult me into the sun. I'm ready for it. The one person I wanted out of this game won immunity so. I don't know what my plans are but accepting death seems like a good idea right now.
This jury is literally gonna be pissed at everyone so I need to start doing whatever I can to make them think we're close, that we're friends. I'll talk to Kevin about Netflix, I'll tell Ashvika she's a queen, I'll give Owen a backrub idgaf but I need to make sure Cameron looks worse than I do. None of them think Ali's done anything, and Dana...they think she's cracked too. The only person I'm okay with beating me is Dana and that's that.
Something good happening at tribal council? For once there's even a possibility.
After chatting with Owen we're trying to start something. Him Ashvika and I all voted for Ruthie last round, so if we stick together that's 3, and we're hoping for at least 5. Our best bets are Emily and Ali. I have no idea if this has a shot of working tbh but I feel like tonight's all or nothing. Unfortunately we can't get Cameron. I tossed around Dana or Zach's names to Owen but like, whoever Ali and Emily (or whoever we can get) want to vote, we'll vote. I don't know how solid the majority alliance is, or who's in cahoots with who, so this is a very...fragile, could-break-at-any-moment plan. If there's any way of convincing these two, the Touchy Subjects answers show that they're not safe if they stick with that side. Time to actually talk to them though and see what's up tho ahhhh
________________________________________________________________
I told Ali Duncan said Dana said Cameron had an idol. Ali revealed that he voted for Duncan because he was telling people Ali told him about the idol. Ali then said to me "I knew he was covering for someone it must be Dana." The gag is I honestly don't know if it was actually Dana skdkdkf I remember her name in the conversation we had but like??? But if it convinces Ali then it works for now
Why did I put Owen to be blindsided by his alliancE?
bc I’m his alliance
And I’m gonna blindside him
So Owen voted for me not Emily hmmm
Maybe he was the one that made the pretty glee voting thing
What’s that paper called again? Omg yes parchment
I’m really scared for this tribal. Owen, Ali, and I have made an alliance and are talking about voting with Kevin and possibly Ashvika. I want to pull in Zach and maybe Dana, but the problem is,,,,, Owen and Ali and Kevin want to vote Dana. I want Dana to stay. I don’t know why. I think I’m just bein gay. I want Will out tbh. And I would’ve wanted Cameron if he wasn’t fucking immune but NO of course I have to be HORRIBLE at tie breakers!!! I’m really shocked by some of the things I got in touchy subjects like wtf man. You’ll enjoy voting me out? You wish you had gotten me out pre-merge? You have to apologize to me after this game? Interesting. This is one of those Touchy Subjects results that I realy wanna take notes about. Usually I don’t take them too seriously but I’m #offended. Ugh I really want to work with Zach but I’m scared of Dana and him being a duo sort of like how Lily and I were a duo I guess? Ugh. I don’t know how to like,,,,, get around that. There’s a lot to figure out about this vote. But I think we can get something going. All I know is that I’m not really feeling like voting for Kevin tonight. ;-) we’ll see what happens
I am LITERALLY a rat and I feel guilty but if this works out then it's fine. I'm fine. Everything will be fine. I need to keep people in this game around me and I'm gonna take heat for it and Cameron might idol me out but like....oh well.
________________________________________________________________
Basically the pieces came together, Emily Ali and I made a chat and we all like fkshd worked on getting Kevin and Ashvika on board. Emily thought she could play a vote negator to make it 5-4 but she cant use it yet SO instead I was like ok I'll try to get them to split the votes somehow and both Will and Dana suggested it anyways kfadsjh lmao so hopefully it's like..... 5-3-2 tonight. I wanted it to be Dana at first bc if it does somehow tie 5-5 I felt like Ruthie would flip and vote Dana but not Will, but maybe now Zach would flip and vote for Will idk probably not. Also I still love Will :'( this game will feel weird without him but he's a huge threat. So is Cameron and Dana tbh like everyone is lowkey trying to press their own agenda and I think they're getting weary of one another but....idk. I feel like I need to do this now bc it'll be me actually taking things into my own hands rather than Kevin leaving and me relying on dana or will wanting Cameron out whenever they decide. I wish Will didn't have to go and if this all blows up on me then fine but like...yeah. god. ppl are gonna be upset with me, wigs all around !
________________________________________________________________
THE ANGEL ON MY SHOULDER IS CRYING BUT THE DEVIL ON MY SHOULDER IS LAUGHING im so ugly i cant wait for this to go wrong and then ppl laugh at me for being an idiot when they read my confessionals after
________________________________________________________________
Lowkey it seemed too easy to get will and dana to want to split the vote and now Ali has disappeared too? I feel like Ali spilled and now theyre all just gonna vote for me but if thats the case then oh well I was never gonna win without trying to get trust in people
STOP STRESSING ME THE FUCK OUT
good bye dana barry .
Finally a vote where I know what’s happening and the people that control everything... don’t. I’m excited! My first blindside where I’m on the like... right end? Wow. I love taking matters into my own hands. Will made an Azores alliance and I feel HORRIBLE because I’m voting him out this round lmao. And Cameron made an alliance with Will and Cameron and I just GOD at his is going to be hard because I could be ruining some potential allies... but also... who cares? I’m making a move, y’all! If it doesn’t work out, then so be it. But I’m putting my trust into Owen, Ali, Ashvika, Kevin... people that I really didn’t expect to work with all together but I’m thankful nonetheless. I’m also thinking this group of five is good because Kevin, Ashvika, and Ali will be easier to beat in the end? I think? Idk. I’m trying to think ahead as much as I can, and weakening Cameron & Co. is the first step to that. I feel guilty but this is what I have to do to win. It’s All Stars, Emily! ALL STARS! GET UR HEAD IN THE GAME!
I made an alliance with Will and Emily.
I want Will to think he's my #1. He's not.
I told them we're winning. We're not. Well... they're not.
me: this alliance is winning
Me: knows that neither of these two can make it to the end
Kevin is voting me yikes.com. I'm getting idoled out yall and it has been fun. Ashvika and Kevin have idols and I get majority = HELP ME PLEASE AMERICA.
I'm on call with ASHVIKA and she says THEY ARE VOTING OUT WILL. WHAT DO I DO PLEASE.
AND APPARENTLY IF THEY DONT VOTE FOR WILL THEY ARE VOTING FOR ME.
If this is all a scare tactic.... it sure is working!!!! More to come later I have 20 minutes to entirely flip this vote ladies. Mama IS staying tonight know that!
OKAY SO! I voted for Ashvika.
Why? Well, two or three reasons.
1. I've voted in the majority. Every time. I can't do that. I will become a target and I want to look like I'm being bobo the fool.
2. If someone (Ashvika) plays an idol on Kevin, it burns her. Also, it protects us (Me, Ali, Dana, Will, but the latter 3 because I'm safe) in the event that someone does idol Kevin.
Also, I'm so glad I won immunity. It's a bad time for me personally and this made everything easier.
Thank you, survivor gods. Thank you.
kevin and ashvika couldnt keep their mouths shut and now I'm getting idoled out. it's been real xoxoxo
I'm literally about to go home, but at least if I do I was able to crack the code and see it coming first. Kinda like Margaery in GoT, she saw it coming but she was just a little too late to stop it.
________________________________________________________________
Well I mean like I called it so y'all aren't as slick as you thought, there just really wasn't anything I could do. I got outplayed by snakes who were willing to throw away the last ounces of respect I had for them, but like I would've done the same and just been more respectful about it. And if you think writing "I hope it's a tie" in your voting confessional absolves you of anything you gotta like...use your brain sorry, if you don't want someone to go home you don't vote for them - it's not that hard! But it's been a fun game and this isn't the last of me (sorry if you wanted it to be). Cast me in your games more often I'm fun!!! xoxo
Will becomes the 11th person voted out of Athena All Stars in a 5-3-2 vote, and the 3rd member of our jury. You can see Will’s preseason interview here.
0 notes