#John mulaney textposts | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

lowvintagesims · 5 months

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@funkiesims and i saw john mulaney last night and this is the front and back of the shirts we made for the occasion

#john mulaney hate is more than welcome in the replies #his set was remarkably unfunny #he’s always had questionable jokes about jewish people but how DARE this man use the phrase ‘jew me down’#when his whole justification was haha my wife is jewish. like ok buddy #you cheated on her and got another woman pregnant robbing her of her child bearing years #left her for that other woman. put her in the hospital. all while you get to flit around being famous #his last bit was about how he thought his tour bus driver was an idiot redneck but that he was actually autistic #i hate him with my whole heart #i can’t believe there were people who paid $800+ to sit in the front #i planned to buy some of anna marie’s art of equal or greater value to the ticket price but everything on her website is sold out :/#i want a print of dinner in march so badly #john mulaney #big mouth #textpost

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redglassbird · 5 months

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sometimes i strongly believe that I could be a perfect standup comedian if not for my need to laugh at everything funny as I say it. So in reality I would be like

Hahahahaahaha the horse hahahahahahah USED THR ELEVATOR? HEHEHEHEIDIDNT HAHAHAHAKNKOWHECOULDDOTHAT

#John mulaney #Standup #The horse used the elevator?#Me #Tumblr #Textpost #Comedy #Comedian #stand up #Stand up comedy #Improv #Mecore #Laughing

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kat-katharsis · 4 months

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There are two wolves inside me, one wants to transition so I can sound like corpse husband. The other wants to transition so I can sound like John Mulaney.

#trans #transmasc #two wolves #mine #me #textpost #text #john mulaney #corpse husband

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solemilyswear · 1 year

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Harry looking at that one photo of Regulus Black:

#regulus black #regulus deserved better #jegulus #james x regulus #harry potter #harry potter and the half blood prince #marauders era #marauders era characters #marauders textpost #john mulaney

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girlpog · 1 year

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Boney M could do Love Shack AND The B-52s could do Rasputin. Love wins

#I’ve been thinking about the b52s a lot recently…#their lead singer is like a stones throw away from sounding like John Mulaney….#boney m #the b 52's #textpost #shitpost

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the-kettle-whistles · 2 years

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john mulaney strikes again

#THIS IS SO LATE BUT I THOUGHT OF IT A COUPLE DAYS AGO #john mulaney #queen elizabeth ii #the royal family #text #textpost #lol #funny #humor #memes #lmao #royal family #the queen #monarchy #elizabeth ii #princess diana #dank memes #fresh memes

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beulf · 2 years

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i just tried to rb one of those ai generated meme posts of george costanza nendroid and im apparently blocked by op 🤨😭

#literally the only thing i can imagine #is that im on a blocklist bc when i was 19 i called out john mulaney for seeming stupid and homophobic #textpost

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ambivalent-anarchy · 3 years

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JOOR Chapters 1-4 In John Mulaney Quotes

Using characters and plot from @hey-marlie's series "Just Out Of Reach". Go check it out if you haven't.

Here <- second post

Peter's entire sexual history explained:

Peter: I like cupcakes

Y/n:

MJ and Ned not putting up with Peter's broody crap and making him go places against his will:

Tony, at Peter literally in any situation:

Jason: *exists*

Peter, wrench in hand:

Thandie putting Peter in his place and telling him to stop playing games with y/n:

Every time y/n expects genuine emotions from Peter and is surprised when he doesn't give any:

Peter being the literal textbook definition of a tired tall child:

The JOOR groupchat whenever Marlie hints towards more angst in the story:

Everyone @ y/n for being able to carry a conversation with Peter:

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aether-night · 2 years

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Real conversation I had with a friend:

Me: JOHN MULANEY HAS A SON!? :0

Friend: DID OLIVIA GIVE BIRTH?! :0

Me: I THINK SO!! Unless John is going around stealing milk from cows that aren’t his.

#textpost #text post #text #friend #meme #netflix #John Mulaney #olivia munn

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velvetkisses28 · 3 years

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"The soul selects her own society, then shuts the door"

- Emily Dickinson

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grungegoths · 5 years

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#text #meme #textpost #john mulaney #mine #lol

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saintsinthecity · 3 years

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barry 92y panel deleted scene

#caitlin gets parasocial about comedians dot jpeg #bill hader #john mulaney #m #me hyping myself up while taking the screenshots: you have the strength to close out of this video. you do not have to watch all 90 minutes #again #also why is this all my content now all i know is put textpost over image #promise i will post better things soon

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ravenflowersposts · 3 years

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Hogwarts Houses as John Mulaney quotes:

Slytherin: I'll keep all my emotions right here

Slytherin: and then one day I'll die

Hufflepuff: my vibe is more like, "hey, you could pour soup in my lap and I'll probably apologise to you"

Gryffindor: I'm like "nah sister, you're not getting me to no secondary location"

Ravenclaw: you know those days when you're like

Ravenclaw: "this might as well happen"?

#gryffindor #ravenclaw #hufflepuff #slytherin #hogwarts #hogwartshouses #text #textpost #hp #harrypotter #convo #conversation #hogwarts houses #incorrect hogwarts #incorrect hogwarts quotes #i love this man i swear #a little something different #source: john mulaney

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punk-pandame · 2 years

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companion to "do my friends hate me or do i just need to go to sleep": do i actually wanna off myself or do i just need to eat a real meal and touch some grass

#suicide tw #suicidal ideation tw #brain no worky #notsns #notnaruto #textpost #i ate gas station snacks for lunch and walked around the neighborhood near work but i #hnnnggg #not good enough i guess #still highkey depressed af alfhdjsl #dw i wont do anything im just whining #john mulaney #john mulaney quote #shut up punky

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hannibalsloverboy · 3 years

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sirius, peter, and james: mcdonald’s!! mcdonald’s!! mcdonald’s!!

*remus pulls into the drive thru*

remus: i’ll have one black coffee

#incorrect wolfstar quotes #incorrect wolfstar textposts #wolfstar textpost #the marauders #marauders textpost #john mulaney

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inactivemainaccount · 4 years

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Presenting: The Fab Five as out-of-context John Mulaney :)