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eiraeths · 4 months

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more scrubs quotes as 141 members because im binging the show

———

Ghost: Ladies and gentlemen, allow me to present, Man Not Caring. [Points at self]

———

Price: Do you want me to order you a clown?

Ghost: A drunk clown hurt me once

———

Soap: It sounds like you’re asking me out on a man date.

Ghost: Johnny, why are you so afraid of loving me?

———

Ghost: I don’t understand it. This wedding is supposed to be about us - how come I can’t be comfortable?

Soap: And I don’t know how many times I have to tell you that you are not wearing sweats!

———

Ghost: I don’t dislike you. I nothing you.

Soap: That’s special

———

Ghost: Hey idiot

Soap: [Turns around]

Ghost: Heh. I said idiot and you turned around.

———

Soap: [after kissing Ghost] Is that a roll of quarters in your pocket or are you having a good time?

Ghost: Actually, it's a roll of quarters. [takes out roll of quarters] Laundry day.

———

Graves: Ghost!

Ghost: And there you are.

Graves: Huh?

Ghost: I was just wondering if there was anything that could really push my headache into a full blown migraine… and there you are.

———

[Standing next to Soap and Graves]

Ghost: Goodness gracious, suddenly I'm getting the most intense headache. Let me see if this relieves the pain.

[grabs Soap and shoves him in between him and Graves]

Ghost: Better! [pushes Soap away]

Ghost: Worse! [Pulls him back]

Ghost: Better! [and away again]

Ghost: Worse! Oh, I could do this all day.

———

Ghost: Mactavish!

Soap: Mactavish? You only call me Mactavish when you're mad or when we're having sex... Baby, are you mad when we're having sex?

Ghost: Sometimes.

———

Gaz: I am not addicted to Journey

Soap: [singing] She's just a small-town girl…

Gaz: [singing] Livin' in a lonely wor-rld, she took the midnight train, going a-n-y-whe-ere.

———

Ghost: [thinking] Wait, is he into me? Quick, make a bad joke and see if he laughs.

Ghost: You hear about the skeleton who couldn't go to the party? He had noBODY to go with.

Soap: A ha ha ha! That's really funny!

Ghost: [thinking] Oh that's not a fair test, that joke's hilarious.

———

Price: Since you’re not that intelligent, I’m going to speak like a caveman from now on. You bad soldier. Me good soldier. You follow.

———

Price: I’m tired of rookies complaining about being called dummos, tubbos, smokers, and whatever the hell jamokers means.

Soap: I was actually saying jokers, but i had coffee cake in my mouth.

———

Gaz: Hey, Soap, wanna get a beer after work?

Soap: Do chickens wish they can fly?

Gaz: ...I have no idea.

Soap: I like to think they do.

———

Soap: [looks up to the ceiling] Now, I know you say you love us all equally. But you don’t, do ya? I’m onto you, big man.

———

okay that’s it

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cenorii · 5 days

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RE headcanons!

PART 1 (if you like it I'll make a sequel with other characters. I was just bored)

My serious headcanons about some RE characters. Some I'll write about more than others because I thought about them more often, I apologize in advance.

Chris Redfield

— his favorite color is green, he enjoys this color and adds it to any set of clothes, even his military gear. He doesn't care if shades of green may not match at all in the same outfit, he just wears that color because he loves it.

— his favorite genre of music in the early years, judging by his daring clothes, guitar and references to «Queen», was heavy metal and pop-rock. Nowadays, many years later, he probably likes the laid-back tunes of «Roxette» and «Savage» because Chris' life has become hectic and he needs an island of peace.

— he smokes, but he's not a heavy smoker. In his youth, Chris smoked a lot and often, judging by his concept art. Now, however, he smokes to get in the right frame of mind and pace, to focus and calm down.

— After the amnesia episode, Chris stopped drinking and now only drinks on holidays. Drinking has become disgusting to him, it reminds him of his episode of weakness.

— Chris prefers his natural scent, doesn't use any special perfume on himself because he washes with regular soap.

— he's a latent gay man, but he's never been in a relationship. Chris seriously doesn't understand why he isn't attracted to women. The last thing he thinks about is his real orientation. He's silly.

— he likes Wesker more than Chris is willing to admit. Since he doesn't realize what kind of attraction it is, Chris doesn't guess his crush. He's too inexperienced in love affairs to realize it. Especially when it comes to Wesker, who he has a ton of emotions associated with, a lot of which are negative.

— Chris has some guitar skills, but after 1998, he barely remembers it. He can't sing, he's just an amateur at it.

— he doesn't know how to cook, ordering takeaways. Chris doesn't like junk food, having given up his attempts to learn how to cook and not even opening the cookbook Claire gave him.

— Chris never has enough time to shave his face or cut his hair. But that doesn't bother him.

— he had a low grade in school, Chris liked fun more than textbooks.

Wesker

— his favorite color is blue, but Wesker doesn't like others to know too much about it, so he adds this color to his clothes very carefully. Blue color in his clothes has never been the main color, it is only an accent.

— Wesker doesn't usually listen to music, he prefers silence, but if he had to choose, he would settle for Frank Sinatra songs. He can only listen to something that won't throw him off his thoughts.

— Wesker doesn't smoke or drink. Spencer dreamed of creating an ideal society, so he raised the Weskers as ideal people. Such people should not drink and smoke. These people should only spend time on self-development and so on.

— he doesn't swear. Wesker doesn't like and/or know how to swear because of his «proper» upbringing. He will never insult a person with a rude word, but will pick up the most innocuous one, even if he is very angry. Who shouts «self-righteous fools» or «ignorant cretins» in anger? Only the child or Wesker, because in his situation I'd be yelling «assholes», «fucking bastards» and so on. He's polite and well-mannered, just like Spencer wanted.

— he has a good sense of humor. Wesker doesn't seem like a joker because his jokes are very subtle and infrequent. He says «I have a date to keep» and then goes and destroys the Red Queen with the phrase «goodbye, fair lady», isn't he the most serious joker in fandom after that?

— Wesker is pansexual, but he doesn't care about relationships and so he, like Chris, is not even aware of his preference. He doesn't pay attention to it, so his involvement with Ms. Muller or his sudden obsession with Chris doesn't give him any reason to wonder what his orientation is. He doesn't care.

— he's in love with Chris, but he sees those feelings as a manifestation of his pride in him.

— his bathroom shelf is filled with various self-care products, and he is very worried about his appearance. First, the smell of his perfume enters the room, and then Wesker enters.

— Ms. Muller was not just a «one-night stand» for him, there was a warm relationship between them, because she remained in good opinion of him and even kept the child. This is a side of Wesker that is unknown to the players, because he had no opportunity or chance to show it. I think they broke up because Wesker was getting too attached to this woman and she was becoming his weakness, and he «can't have weaknesses». His job may have also interfered with the relationship, causing Muller to make her own decision to get out of his way, keeping the good memories alive. Wesker, on the other hand, tried to forget about that pleasant time with her so it wouldn't interfere with him.

— he is not ashamed to recognize someone else's merits and praise another person. He appreciates people who are good at something, he is sincere about it.

— Wesker is not a villain and an antagonist, he is the anti-villain. He has all the personality traits that fit that definition. He is not the pure evil that many believe him to be due to their inattention.

— he can cook, and he does it well. Wesker is known for being great at everything and cooking is no exception. Back in the days of S.T.A.R.S., he took care of his healthy diet, but once he gained power and became a bioterrorist, he stopped cooking for himself, preferring to order food from restaurants or have a personal chef. Because of the virus, he doesn't need to eat as often as normal people, so he really enjoys the process, since it rarely happens.

— because of his principles or Spencer's upbringing, Wesker can't directly harm a child. Children have never been a target for him, and he considers it beneath his dignity.

— his name is a mononym. Wesker doesn't call himself Albert and doesn't like it when others do (but doesn't stop them out of politeness). He is Wesker to everyone and to himself. However, there is a contradiction here — he hates the word «Wesker» and this whole project. Surely he must have considered changing his name if he had achieved the evolution of humanity. He still uses his initials AW when necessary.

Leon S Kennedy

— Leon has no color preference, he wears whatever clothes he feels comfortable in. He doesn't care if the colors don't match.

— he loves children and is easy to get along with.

— he uses feminine shower gels and likes sweet scents.

— likes to drink to relax or for any other reason. But he doesn't smoke.

— the music that Leon likes is very hard to define. He is probably a music lover who listens to whatever he likes.

— Leon isn't shy about swearing. He likes to make silly jokes to lighten the mood.

— He knows how to cook, but not very well, but these skills are enough for him. Leon can make toast or fry eggs, but it would be difficult for him to cook something more complicated, so he often watches tutorials on the Internet or eats fast food.

— Leon is bisexual and he knows it. He's crazy about Ada Wong, but he tries to hide it, which is unsuccessful.

— he likes karaoke.

— it annoyed him that if he showed up in any kind of transportation, there was a high probability of an accident or something. He sometimes wondered if he was a loser.

— he had a girlfriend once, but the affair was so casual that it broke up after almost a month.

— In school he had average grades, Leon could not be called a bad student, but he was not an excellent student either.

Ada Wong

— her favorite color is not only red, but also black.

— she loves elegant clothes and doesn't care if they don't fit her work. Despite the design, Ada chooses only clothes in which she can move freely.

— only Wesker knows her real name, and her name «Ada Wong» is just a rehash of «AW» (Albert Wesker).

— I like to think that she and Wesker could have acted like best friends, but voluntarily opted out for personal reasons.

— Ada pretends not to like music, but she actually likes «Marina and the Diamonds». She listens to these songs alone, in a deserted place.

— she smoked once, but she quit. She doesn't drink.

— Ada doesn't have any holidays, she doesn't even celebrate her own birthday.

— she's straight, and she's openly attracted to Leon.

— loves subtle scents in perfume, she always smells nice, but this scent is barely perceptible.

— Ada can't cook and hasn't tried to learn. She eats food from cafes and prefers to go there herself instead of having it delivered.

— She has no problem with foreign languages, she probably knows a few besides English.

— she was an honors student in school and she's easy to learn new things.

— Ada is an anti-hero.

Alex Wesker

— Alex's favorite color is white. It is the color of sterility and truth that she strives for in her research.

— I guess her full name is Alexandra.

— loves getting her nails done to cheer herself up. Due to illness and failed experiments, she is always in a bad mood, so taking care of herself helps her keep her head cool and rational.

— Alex loved her own short hair, which she had in the past, but it reminded her too much of Albert, whom she respected. Because of what she knew about «Project W» and the truth about them, Alex felt a kind of guilt for keeping her brother in the dark and lying. So she changed her image so she wouldn't think about it.

— she's a lesbian.

— Alex knows Russian.

— she must have a secret altar in her house dedicated to Albert.

— she respects Albert so much that she even tries to think and act like him. It is forbidden to insult her brother in her presence, even though they have hardly ever met and are not related.

— Alex did grieve when she learned of her brother's death in the volcano. But when she learned of his death in 1998, she was not sad, because she had not yet had time to get to know him so well and get into his personality.

— the clothes Alex wears are formal and office style. She doesn't like to wear something informal because she feels insecure in it.

— the mole under her eye is painted, or appeared there with age.

— Alex likes only classical music, her ear cannot perceive anything from modern genres.

— Has never thought about relationships, but can admit if she likes someone.

— Alex's only humor is black.

— often communicates with quotes from books, like someone quotes from songs. This helps her to express her thoughts properly and emphasize them.

— she's a lot harder to piss off than Albert.

#resident evil #rebhfun #chris redfield #albert wesker #leon s kennedy #ada wong #alex wesker #resident evil headcanons #I don't want to offend anyone

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dewdropdinosaur · 13 days

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Smoker, Mid-Night Joker for Love

LUCIFER X READER

Summary: You’re a ring fighter at the most popular bar in Hell. Maybe your cigarette break lights a spark in the King of Hells heart.

Warnings: Smoking, implied illegal fighting. Rating: PG-12

Wrote this on my phone cause laptop crashed so apologies for any typos, format issues, or inconsistency.

For the amazing @tsukiko26

In the bustling streets of the demonic underworld, where sinners sought refuge in the vibrant chaos of the afterlife, stood a peculiar establishment known as the "Sinners' Sanctuary." It was a haven for the damned, where drinks flowed freely, laughter echoed through the air, and mischief lurked in every shadow.

On this particular evening, the eclectic crew from the Hazbin Hotel—Charlie, the hopeful and compassionate princess of Hell decided that team bonding was necessary. Angel Dust, of course, recommended “Sinner’s Sanctuary” and the princess, distracted by the face value of the name heartily agreed. So Charlie, Angel, Husk, and Alastor; were accompanied by none other than Lucifer himself, per Charlie’s invitation. Charlie, ever the optimist, had insisted on a night of bonding to strengthen their camaraderie.

Amidst the cacophony of voices and clinking glasses, they found themselves at the heart of the Sinners' Sanctuary, surrounded by a motley crew of sinners and demons indulging in various vices. As they settled into their seats at the bar, Lucifer's piercing gaze swept across the room, his crimson eyes alight with curiosity.

His attention was soon captivated by the sight of a fighting ring nestled in the far corner of the bar—a spectacle of sin and violence that drew a crowd like moths to a flame. Within the ring, a figure moved with effortless grace, their every movement a symphony of precision and power.

“Your winner and ten-time champion - Y/NNNNNN!”

The mysterious and powerful demon whose allure was as captivating as her prowess in combat raised her hand in victory. Her form was a blur of motion as she danced around her opponents, delivering swift and decisive blows with a grace that belied her demonic nature.

Lucifer found himself transfixed by her beauty and skill, his heart quickening with each victorious bout. There was something undeniably alluring about her, a magnetic pull that stirred something primal within him.

As the night wore on, Lucifer found himself drawn closer to the fighting ring, his gaze never leaving Y/N's mesmerizing form. He watched in awe as she emerged victorious time and time again, her confidence never faltering even in the face of the fiercest opponents.

Finally, as the last challenger fell before her, Y/N stepped out of the ring, her breath coming in exhilarated gasps as she basked in the adulation of the crowd. As the clamor of the bar gradually subsided and the last patrons stumbled out into the darkness, Lucifer approached her in the backalley behind the bar with a confident smile, his charm as potent as any spell.

"Quite the impressive display," he remarked, his voice smooth as silk as he offered her a charming smile.

Y/N turned to him, her eyes flashing with a mixture of surprise and intrigue. "And who might you be?" she replied, her voice tinged with a hint of mischief.

"I am Lucifer." he declared, his tone imbued with a regal confidence that left no room for doubt.

Y/N's lips curled into a playful smirk as she studied him with a knowing glint in her eyes. "Well then, Lucifer, to what do I owe the pleasure of such a compliment from a gentleman as yourself?," she said, her voice dripping with promise.

"Oh nothing owed, I promise. Just impressed by quite the spectacle you put on tonight," Lucifer remarked, his voice a low rumble that cut through the silence of the emptying bar.

Y/N turned to him, her eyes gleaming with a mixture of exhaustion and defiance, unwrapping the bandages from her wrist. "It's a living," she replied, her tone edged with bitterness.

Lucifer arched an eyebrow, sensing the weight of her words. "A living, you say?" he pressed, his interest piqued.

Y/N's lips twisted into a rueful smile as she met his gaze with a shrug "More like a curse," she admitted, her voice heavy with resignation. After unwrapping her wrists, she pulled out a small cigarette. Struggling to get a light, Lucifer snapped and it sparked into flame.

“Oh…thanks.”

Intrigued, Lucifer leaned in closer, his eyes narrowing with curiosity. "You can thank me by explaining." he urged, his tone gentle yet insistent.

“It’s nothing, the owner and I just ain’t…getting along with it comes to my job.”

Lucifer began, his tone tinged with urgency as he drew closer to her. "I couldn't help but notice... the owner of this establishment, do they own your soul?"

Y/N's eyes widened in realization, a shadow passing over her features as she nodded slowly. "Yes," she confessed, her voice heavy with resignation. "In exchange for my safe existence in this realm, I am bound to fight in the ring every night. I know I know, some safety right?”

Lucifer's resolve hardened like tempered steel. With a steely glint in his eyes, he spoke steadily “The safety of my citizens is my top priority. I—I think I can help you. I would like to at least.”He wanted to break the chains that bound her and grant her the freedom she so desperately craved.

“But what could you do? And what would you want? Every action comes with a price down here.”

"But what do you want, Y/N?" Lucifer asked, his voice soft yet resolute. "In exchange, would you allow me the honor of escorting you on a date?"

Y/N's eyes widened in surprise, her breath catching in her throat at the unexpected offer. For a moment, she hesitated, uncertainty flickering in her gaze like a fleeting shadow.

But then, with a defiant tilt of her chin, she met Lucifer's gaze head-on, her eyes blazing with newfound determination. "You flatter me, your majesty. I would not mind that at all.” she replied, her voice ringing with conviction.

“But first, mind giving me another light.”

And as they made their way out of the dimly lit confines of the Sinners' Sanctuary, a sense of hope blossomed in their hearts—Lucifer metaphorically setting off a beacon of light in the darkness, a promise of redemption in a world consumed by sin and despair. One could hope they didn’t snuff out like that cigarette.

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