#Jonas the apple tree

[anthonyspage]

🌌🏞❄️🌲🦋🦌🌸🍎🍃🍁🍇🐦✨

#Keepers Of The Universe - Seasons Change By Jonas Jodicke #Night #Nocturnal #Woods #Forest #Snow #Trees #Nature #Butterflies #Magical Butterflies #Deer #Magical Deer #Antlers #Flowers #Apples #Leaves #Grapes #Birds #Magical Creatures #Mystical Creatures #Supernatural Creatures #Magic #Magical #Mystical #Supernatural #Art #App #Adult Colouring Book #Adult Coloring Book #Tap Color - Color By Number

[fantasydreaamer]

Sugar Apple Fairy Tale: Anne Halford [ESFJ]

MBTI Type: ESFJ - Extraverted - Sensing - Feeling - Judging

Extraverted Feeling (Fe): Anne is a very kind, caring, and compassionate girl who wears her heart on her sleeve. She enjoys helping people and making them feel appreciated and warm. She's great at detecting other peoples moods and feelings. Anne helps and offers emotional support to people that don't like her, Bridget and Jonas, she puts her personal feelings and issues aside and helps them. She cares about social harmony and steps up to promote this, like when she when with Glen to try to help Bridget. She constantly puts other people's feelings and needs above her own. With the Duke she wanted to complete his confection despite the danger, validate his feelings, and give him hope. But Shall being the opposite told him how deluded he was and was totally uncaring of his feelings, Anne didn't liked this. When Lafalle wanted to kidnap her she was completely focused on others, not herself. She's a great leader and team player that values unity and cooperation, at the Paige workshop she was able to align the individualistic team into a common goal and sentiment they all agreed on.

Introverted Sensing (Si): She wants to be like her mom, a great sugar artisan and follows in her steps. Memories are very important to her, in the LN she thinks that the wagon is old but full of memories. Her crafting method is about gathering all the possible details first and then meticulously executing the piece. Anne likes the feeling of sugar and molding and chooses a profession that enables her to have a hands-on approach, sugar crafting, and thinks that's she's not good at studying.

Extraverted Intuition (Ne): Anne is open to new possibilities, job opportunities, and experiences. She is idealistic and believes that fairies and humans can be friends. Good at improvising and spontaneous ideas. When gathering information from old books about what has worked before in the Paige workshop failed (Si), she dissmised it and was open to a new vision, the snowflake tree. In the second contest, Anne depicted an abstract idea, the former kings wish for human and fairy coexistence, and made it tangible in a confection.

Introverted Thinking (Ti): Anne's not good at being detached and objective, she struggles to separate feelings and situations. That's Shall's strong suit, he balances her. In the LN she is aware at how illogical the Duke is at her intention of Christina's sugar confection, but she doesn't voice it and puts the Duke's needs above her safety. She did it for her pride as an artisan, but still she was being illogical that's why Shall gets annoyed and calls her an idiot. In vol 3 she starts to use her Ti in her sugar crafting, she realizes that gathering details is not always enough and realizes that she needs to understand the reason why the royal family likes themed fairy sugar candies. She searches for answers and when she understand the reason, she's able to apply this knowledge to her confection.

Sugar Apple Fairy Tale MBTI:

Shall Fen Shall: ISTP

Lafalle Fen Lafalle: ENTJ

#Sugar Apple Fairy Tale #Anne Halford #Shall Fen Shall #Challe Fen Challe #SAFT #Anime #MBTI #ESFJ #Light Novel #SAFT Spoilers #SAFT Character Profile #SAFT MBTI #SAFT Mine

[shortkingvi]

bees? bumbled.

bumbleby nation, it happened. here's an incoherent playlist of happy, lovey, soft songs because our gals have finally found their way to each other in the way they were always meant to. enjoy.

spotify link // apple music link

nothing serious - ages and ages // i think i like you - the band CAMINO // like real people do - hozier // strangers - jonas brothers // pink skies - LANY // i know a place - MUNA // kids - orville peck // where i wanna be - A R I Z O N A // mess is mine - vance joy // thunder love - little dragon // talk - khalid // sleepy eyes - the aces // nervous - joan // i got so much to tell you - nightly // c'est la vie - peach tree rascals // daylight - taylor swift // oh shit...are we in love? - valley // sunflower, vol. 6 - harry styles // ready for you - HAIM // the bones - maren morris ft. hozier // 1950 - king princess // chasing cars - snow patrol // you're gonna make me lonesome when you go - bob dylan (miley cyrus cover) // let's sort the whole thing out - carly rae jepsen

#this is a MESS lmao #it's good but it's ALL over the place #feel free to shuffle it truly will not affect the experience #i love all these songs dearly #this one was a struggle btw i did zero angsty pathos sadness shit here just fluffy happy feelings #enjoy! #playlists i made! #<- my playlist tag if you're interested #i have a master's in cultural musicology lol i am always ready 4 music talk #rwby #yang xiao long #blake belladonna #bumbleby

[karahalloway]

(Less Than) Noble Intentions: Chapter 13 - Invidia (Part 1)

Fandom: TRR

Pairing: Drake Walker x F!OC (Harper Gale)

Series Summary: The social season may be over, but Harper Gale's problems are just beginning. With everyone at court a potential suspect, can she and Drake survive the engagement tour and get to the bottom of the plot against her and clear her name? An AU take of TRR2 featuring my OTP - Harper & Drake.

Masterlist: (Less Than) Noble Intentions

Chapter Summary: Back at Applewood, things between Harper and Drake get heated... and not just because of the sweltering summer heat.

Word Count: 4,200

Rating/Warnings: M (swearing, angst, aggravation)

Chapter theme song:

A/N1: So... This chapter kinda ran away from me 😅 So much so that I’ve decided to split it into two posts, partially because I know I’ve been working on this chapter for a while and many of you have messaged me asking for an ETA, and partially to make people’s Tumblr’s reading experience easier (much easier to read a ~4k word post than a +10k post… which is how long the entire chapter will end up being lol). Part 2 available here.

A/N2: Most of you will know that many of my chapters feature so-called ‘chapter theme songs’ that either helped inspire the contents of a particular chapter, or I feel do a particularly good job of capturing the mood. This is the case for this chapter as well, and I would actually encourage all of you (especially if you had some choice thought/words to say about Drake’s behaviour in the preceding chapter) to listen to the song accompanying this chapter, as it will give you a surprisingly astute insight into Drake’s frame of mind (never thought I’d say this about a Nick Jonas song, but here we are 😅).

A/N3: Translation of French terms/phrases at the end. Also, I’ve provided to links in the chapter itself to help you guys visualise what I had in my head re clothes and other details - the pic of Drake is as close as I could get, but it should give you a taste 😋

A/N4: Invidia is a Latin term and it means ‘envy’.

Chapter 13 - Invidia (Part 1)

"I thought this was supposed to be an apple pick," I grumble, reaching up to grab a luscious Cordonian Ruby from its branch. "Not a picnic."

A slew of camera shutters click eagerly from the sidelines.

I swallow a groan as I drop the fruit into the wicker basket at my feet.

As if the paps hadn't taken enough photos of me already today... and it wasn't even lunchtime yet.

"No one said it couldn't be both!" declares Maxwell, expertly rolling an apple down an outstretched arm and over the nape of his neck to pop it into the air with the flick of a shoulder.

The clicking intensifies manically.

"True," I concede, filching Maxwell's impromptu juggling ball out of the air and aiming it into the basket. "Except we're the only ones actually picking apples."

When Bertrand had told me that we'll be spending the day out in the Applewood orchards, participating in the annual Cordonian Ruby harvest, I imagined that we'll be doing some serious agrarian labour — climbing trees, sorting apples, and crating.

But — as always — the aristos seemed to just like making a show of it all, without wanting to actually break a sweat... or a manicured nail.

So, instead of joining the seasonal labourers and the kids from the local area who were busy with the real work, the court had set up a private camp in a secluded corner of the orchard — complete with fancy hors d'oeuvres and mint julep — from which they could pretend to be contributing to the collective effort while the paps snapped stylish pics of them from the press corner.

The whole self-aggrandising sham made me want to laugh.

And I would've... had I not been so ticked off by it all.

I toss another apple forcefully into the basket.

Especially since I too was stuck in this pointless PR stunt, instead of with Drake, trying to mend the rift that Christian's unexpected reveal had opened up between us.

"The press seem to love it, though," observes Hana, strolling past in a pretty pink spaghetti-strap sundress, a basket of apples in hand.

"And we must please the press," I mutter with a sarcastic roll of my eyes.

I'd already spent the whole of this morning posing for photos in Valtoria's gardens, fielding a million and one questions on topics ranging from how I felt about becoming a duchess (ambiguous), how I planned to decorate the chateau (with furniture), through to my secret morning beauty hacks (concealer can fix anything).

And, since the whole intrusive affair had taken much longer than planned — because for whatever reason, the paps were fascinated by anything that came out of my mouth, and Jonathan had kept encouraging them on the basis that it was 'good for my image' — we'd had to rush back to Applewood for the apple pick, I hadn't had the chance to get changed.

Which meant that I am still dressed in the same embroidered red dress that I wore for the photoshoot, my hair remains piled into an elaborate braided up-do on top of my head, and I still have an entire drug-mart's worth of make-up smeared onto my face.

And because it’s hot, the long, tight sleeves of my designer dress are causing me to sweat like a pig, the tightly pinned hairstyle is starting to make my skull hurt, and my face is itching like crazy.

In short, I am uncomfortable as hell.

But I can’t go back to the manor to swap clothes because Bertrand is watching me like a hawk, making sure that I don’t 'slink off' as he called it, and 'get into trouble' again.

I chuck another apple into my basket irately. "How much longer do we have to posture here for?"

"Usually until late afternoon," admits Maxwell.

My eyes widen. "You're joking! I'll have melted into this stupid dress by then!"

"If you're hot, you can always go under the marquee to grab a drink and cool off," Maxwell suggests, now expertly juggling five apples, much to the delight of the press.

"And fight my way through a sea of judgemental looks and snide remarks?" I snort. "No thanks. I had my fill of that at Madeleine's ball. I won't be willingly putting myself through that again."

"I can understand that," he concedes, landing an apple on his chest, where it totters unsteadily for a second before falling to the ground. "Bugger! I thought I had it!"

"Close, but no cigar," I tell him wryly.

He quickly catches the remaining airborne apples and cradles them against his sternum so he can pick up the wayward specimen. Looking back up at me, he adds, "If you'd prefer, I can get you something while you stay out here."

"You'll get the same treatment if you go in there," I remind him.

Despite the fact that all the evidence now pointed to Maxwell being the one behind the bachelor party photo sell-out, I've come to the somewhat optimistic conclusion that that since he hasn’t tried anything similar since I've arrived in Cordonia, combined with the fact that he's pretty much consistently had my back over the past few months indicated that Drake had probably been right in his assessment that the whole thing had been a one-off act of financial desperation.

At least, that's what I sincerely hope... My list of allies is already worryingly short, and I don’t want to indict Maxwell until I have clear-cut proof in my hands.

He shrugs unconcernedly. "As Taylor Swift says, the haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate. But you just gotta shake, shake, shake, shake, shake. Shake it off... Shake it off! Whoo-hoo-ooh!"

Despite my foul mood, I can't help but crack up as Maxwell throws his head back to emphatically vocalise the end of the catchy stanza. "I wish I had your positivity..."

"Don't worry, young Padawan," he winks. "I have plenty for the both of us."

"Well, we're definitely gonna need it!" I harrumph. "But, if you really are willing to go in there, I'd love a drink."

"Are you going to the marquee?" asks Hana, having just returned from depositing her basket of apples in the unofficial collecting area that Maxwell and I had set up. "I was just heading there myself."

"I can walk you over," offers Maxwell. "That is... if you'd like me to..."

Hana flashes him a blush-filled smile. "I'd love that. Harper? Would you like to join us?"

"I'm good," I respond. Based on the way Hana and Maxwell are sneaking coy glances at each other, they could do with some alone time together, without me playing awkward third-wheel. "You kids have fun."

"Alright," concedes Hana. "See you in a bit!"

But as I wave them off, I sense a presence behind me.

Turning cautiously around, I feel my stomach tighten involuntary when I realise who it is.

"Err... Christian...!" I exclaim. "What are you doing here? I thought you'd be with Madeleine..."

"I took the chance to escape while she was otherwise occupied," he murmurs, taking my hand in his to brush a kiss against my knuckles, eyes not leaving mine. "You look sensational, as always, Harper."

"Thanks," I reply sheepishly. "But you should give your regards to Jonathan. This get-up was his idea."

"The man does have an unrivalled sense of taste," affirms Christian, his gaze travelling over me appreciatively. "He is a firm believer in the adage that style is a way to say who you are without having to speak. So, the best way to make people think that you are a duchess, is to dress you like one. And, as always, he did a marvellous job."

"That's why you pay him the big bucks," I quip before my brain has a chance to slam a filter on my mouth. "Err... What I meant was—"

Christian laughs. "You know I value your forthrightness, Harper. And you are right. If you want the best, you need to be willing to pay for it — be it with money, time, or favours. But a smart investment is worth its weight in gold."

"Is that why you’re giving me the duchy?" I ask pointedly. "Because you're investing in me?"

"In a manner of speaking," he admits. "I saw an opportunity to fulfill multiple needs with one, simple deed, and I couldn't afford to pass it up. Especially since the arrangement is beneficial for both of us."

"Why?" I query. "What's in it for you?"

"At the moment? Nothing." He spreads his hands categorically. "I am simply trying to help a friend."

"But down the line...?" I press meaningfully, knowing that a gift of this size would never come without some serious strings attached.

"Down the line, I hope you'll settle at Valtoria permanently."

My eyes widen. "Permanently? But I thought—"

Christian chuckles. "You truly believed that Valtoria is simply a temporary set-up while we work to uncover the plot against you?"

"Yeah..." I admit. "I mean, you said you were doing it to complement my status as the Royal Consort. But once my name is cleared..." I bite my bottom lip, leaving the end of the thought hanging.

"...the charade is no longer necessary," finish Christian, catching my meaning. "That is correct. However, I hope that once the scandal has been put to bed, you will stay in Cordonia and use your newfound position for the benefit of the kingdom. As I said before, I firmly believe you would be an asset to this country. Because of your unique situation, you would be able to bridge the class divide between the general public and the nobility – bringing important matters to the attention of the Council that have previously been overlooked, or deemed inconsequential by those who have known nothing but privilege. And, at the same time, you could breathe new life into our oftentimes archaic processes and institutions, galvanising transformation from within. You would be a true envoy of change... of progress. More than I could ever be. And the gift of a duchy is a small price to pay for such immeasurable benefits."

"And I am grateful... Truly," I say, twirling the horseshoe charm around my wrist. "For helping me... For always seeing the best in me. And I don't mean to look a gift horse in the mouth, but being a duchess... Managing an estate... That's a huge responsibility! I wouldn't even know where to start! And I'm still not sure if I—"

"I appreciate that I sprung the whole thing upon you rather abruptly," he interjects, taking my hand. "But given that we talked about this arrangement previously, surely it cannot have been that much of a surprise?"

"I know... I just..." I shake my head reticently, trying to find the right words.

I knew I should be more enthusiastic about the whole prospect. But I just couldn't seem to shake the echo of the door slamming in Drake's wake as he stormed out of the observatory.

"Harper," he says softly, stroking his thumb over the back of my hand. "I know you have qualms and often doubt your own abilities. But you already are a duchess — in everything but name. After all, you represented House Beaumont during the social season as if you were a born-and-bred member of the family. All I am proposing is making your status official. Which we should ideally do sooner, rather than later, given that we will be starting the international leg of the tour in a few days. And having the paperwork squared away before our departure would grant significant boon for your image."

"Oh. Okay…” The knot in my stomach tightens. "What do we—?"

I trail off as I catch sight of a familiar flash of blue over Christian's shoulder.

Drake.

He's marching towards the mound of apple-laden baskets that Maxwell and I have amassed with Hana's help, blue plaid shirt hanging open in the face of the mid-morning heat, and a Kimes Ranch baseball cap wedged low over his forehead.

I take an involuntarily step towards him, raising my hand to try and grab his attention without being too overt about it, given where we were.

But if he's spotted me in turn, he makes no move to advertise it. Instead, he focuses on piling as many apples as he can into the two metal buckets that he brought with him.

I glance up at Christian apologetically. "I'm sorry... I need to..."

"Of course," he nods dutifully, stepping back.

There is something in his expression that I can't quite place, but I don't have time to think on it because Drake is already double-timing it back the way he'd come, and I have to catch him before he disappears on me again.

Grabbing the half-full basket at my feet, I hurry after him as fast as my stiletto-clad feet allow me to on the uneven, grassy ground. Even though I am desperate to unpack what happened this morning in Valtoria, I know I can’t just chase after Drake like a damsel in distress, in the middle of a royal event with an army of reporters hanging around, so I need some sort of plausible deniability for following after him.

But as I emerge from the final row of trees, I see a sight that nearly sends my basket of apples tumbling to the ground.

Kiara — dressed in a lacy black romper with a plunging neckline and a high-low, see-through skirt — was sitting on the tailgate of a vintage-looking Renault pick-up, body strategically angled so that there is no way that Drake could overlook her push-up bra-enhanced cleavage that is all but being thrust into his face.

What the hell...?

I try to come up with some kind of explanation for what I am seeing that is anything other than what it looks like.

But I can't.

It’s right there in front of me, in plain black and white.

She is saying something to him, a playful smile on her face. I'm too far away for me to make out the words, but as she filches an apple from his hand to lift it to coquettishly her mouth, her aim is clear... She is blatantly making a move on him. And if there is any room for doubt left about her intentions, they are quickly dispelled by the low moan that floats out of her mouth as she bites suggestively into the shiny red flesh of the apple, her eyes fluttering shut in over-exaggerated delectation.

I can't see Drake's face — given that his back is to me — but I can see that he's no longer focused on unpacking the remainder of his bucket. Instead, his head is turned towards Kiara as she offers him a taste of the fruit in her hand.

I feel my hand tighten on the basket handle.

I have no idea what is going on, but whatever it is, it’s going to end...

Now.

Kiara may not know that Drake and I are together — given the stupid, platonic charade that we have to maintain while we worked to clear my name —but I expect more from Drake. Especially since this is the second time that I've caught him alone with Kiara in a situation that was more than questionable, and he didn’t made any move to shake her off until after I interrupted them.

Which begs the question... Had I been too quick to believe him when he'd told me at the Coronation Ball that she was not his type, and there was nothing for me to worry about?

There is only one way to find out.

Squaring my shoulders, I march up to the back of the truck, slamming the basket forcefully down on the tailgate. "Looks like you forgot something, Walker."

Kiara drops the apple with a startled gasp. "Oh, mon dieu!"

I ignore her, my eyes fixed accusingly on Drake.

He barely even looks at me as he scoffs, "You're the one to talk, Gale."

I was perversely hoping for some kind of guilty reaction from Drake as well. But the fact that he's not only non-pulsed by my appearance, but apparently irritated by it, only serves to drive my pulse higher.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" I demand.

"You know exactly what it means," he growls, before turning on his heel to tromp back into the orchard without a backwards glance.

I stare after him, flabbergasted.

I catch him in a comprising situation with another woman, and he is pissed off at me? In what world does that—?

"Était-ce vraiment nécessaire?" demands Kiara huffily, hopping off the tailgate. "I don't know what your issue is with Drake, but you could've at least waited until we'd finished talking, instead of interrupting si grossièrement..."

"Sorry," I mutter sarcastically. "It really couldn't wait..."

She harumphs under her breath. "You Américains are always so impatient... While in Europe, you'd do well to remember to wait your turn."

Flicking her hair behind her shoulders dismissively, she saunters after Drake.

I briefly contemplate picking up the apple she'd dropped and flinging it at her. But I've always sucked at softball, and the last thing I need is for her to run crying foul to Madeleine on the off chance that I do manage to nail her in the back of the head. Because my life at court is difficult enough already without Miss Wannabe Queen Bee going out of her way to make it an absolute hell in retaliation for me picking on one of her hench-maidens.

So, I settle for simply kicking the half-eaten Ruby across the grass in frustration.

"Ne vous inquiète pas, Demoiselle," consoles Schweitzer, stepping out from the shadow of the trees once Kiara was out of earshot. "His passions sometimes get the better of him."

A derisive snort escapes me. "Yeah. Tell me about it."

My bodyguards had shown up — as if by magic — after Drake's abrupt departure from Valtoria this morning, and have been at my side ever since. And while I would've normally been annoyed at the fact that third parties had witnessed my less than amiable interaction with my boyfriend just now, it is heartening to know that someone else has drawn the same conclusions as me.

Schweitzer's mouth twitches. "I mean his passion for you."

My eyes widen. "For me? But he—"

"You are the only one who arouses such a formidable strength of feeling inside of him," confirms Allard, also making an appearance. "And he's been especially unquiet today."

"I know..." I sigh dejectedly, the fight going out of me at the reminder of what happened this morning. "But I don't know why. Every time I try to talk to him, he storms off."

"Then prevent him from doing so," shrugs Allard.

"You say that like it's easy..." I accuse.

But, having dispensed their impromptu wisdom for the day, the two Guard have already melted back into the shade, like a pair of cryptic Jedi Masters returning to the Force, and I get no further response.

I blow a frustrated raspberry as I assess my options.

The sooner I talk to Drake, the better. I hate having all this unspoken tension between us. Especially since I have no idea what I did wrong. I mean, I was just as surprised by Christian's unexpected gift as Drake, so it can't be that...

But I know that I can’t just confront him in the middle of a royal event with a platoon of reporters milling around, on the lookout for even the slightest whiff of a story.

I have to get him alone. Ideally somewhere private.

But where?

My eyes land on the pickup and I give myself a mental smack on the forehead.

Duh.

Walking around to the cab, I open the passenger-side door and climb in.

Drake is obviously taking the picked apples somewhere — a packing centre, a barn, a warehouse. I can hitch a ride with him, on the pretext of helping him unload the crates when we get to wherever he is going. And — most importantly — we can talk on the way. Without him being able to shrug me off.

I close the door back around and settle into the well-worn seat to wait.

Before long, I catch sight of him in the driver's side wing mirror as he emerges from between the trees — alone — with another load of apples.

If he's surprised by my disappearance, I can't see it on his face. Instead, he concentrates on making his way to the tailgate, and I lose sight of him as he rounds the side of the truck. But I can hear the sounds of his undertakings as he proceeds to stow the apples away, as well as the rattle and creak of the slightly rusty springs when he climbs into the bed to rearrange the crates.

I tap my fingers against my thigh, waiting — both nervously and impatiently — for him to finish, so we can get going, literally and metaphorically. Because while I am anxious to clear the air with Drake, I am also fully aware that even though I may have managed to give Bertrand the slip earlier, it’s only a matter of time before he comes looking for me. And I want to be well away before he does.

Finally, I hear the tailgate clang shut.

My pulse thuds in my throat as I wait for Drake to appear on the other side of the cab...

"The hell you think you're doing, Gale?"

"Argh!"

The unexpected sound of Drake yanking the passenger door open behind me causes me to slam myself head-first into the low-slung roof panel with a bang.

"Ow..." I grumble, rubbing the top of my skull painfully. "Why do you insist on doing that?"

"You're the one who keeps letting your guard down," he counters in a deadpan manner. After a beat, he asks, "You okay?"

"I'll live," I assure him wryly, checking my fingertips to make sure that the thousand and one bobby pins that had been wedged into my hair haven’t ended up stabbing through into my skin as a result of the forceful collision.

"Great," he declares, pulling the door wider. "Now get out."

I meet his gaze impassively. "No."

The muscle in his jaw clenches. "I'm not asking again, Gale."

"I didn't hear you ask the first time, Walker," I riposte, leaning back against the worn leather with crossed arms.

He cusses under his breath. "D'you want to get caught?"

"No," I tell him flatly. "So, you'd better start driving."

"Bordel de merde..." he grits, slamming the door shut.

I watch him stomp around the front of the truck with a murderous expression...

...which makes me all the more determined to find out what the hell has gotten him so worked up.

He wrenches the driver's side door open and climbs into the cab, teeth gritted and eyes fixed ahead. Grabbing the bottom of the open window panel, he bangs it shut again before reaching for the key in the ignition.

Giving the key a forceful twist, he holds it in place while he gives the gas pedal a couple of aggressive pumps. After a few coughs and splutters, the arthritic diesel rumbles into life. Dropping the handbrake, he throws the shifter into gear, and soon we're trundling along the dumpy orchard path.

"So? You gonna tell me?" I ask after a couple dozen yards of total silence, save for the puffing of the engine and the creak of the suspension.

"Tell you what?" he asks gruffly, eyes fixed firmly ahead, a death-grip on the steering wheel.

"Why you're fuming like an active volcano."

His eyes flick over to me briefly before focusing back out through the windshield. "We're all allowed shit days, Gale.”

"Obviously," I concede. "But I want to know what caused it and why you're taking it out on me."

"I'm not taking it out in you."

"Yes. You are. And I don't—"

He scoffs. "Trust me. If I were taking it out on you, you'd know it."

"Oh, so you giving me the silent treatment since we got back from Valtoria isn't taking it out on me?" I demand archly.

His continues to torch a hole through the glass in front of him.

"How about you storming out on me without explanation — not once, but three times so far today? Is that not taking it out on me either?"

His grip on the wheel tightens.

"And what about whatever the hell that was with Kiara just now, huh? Was that also not—?"

He suddenly slams the breaks on, and I nearly face-plant into the glove box as the truck lurches to a stop.

"Hey! What the fuck, Wa—?"

But he's already thrown the cab door closed behind him with such vehemence that it rattles the whole truck.

Straightening myself back up, I see that we've arrived at our destination, which is an old stone barn with heavy wooden doors and an open gable roof.

I hear Drake drop the tailgate with a clang. Opening the passenger door, I hop out of the cab and quickly make my way around to the back...

...but by the time I get there, he's already tramped into the barn.

Gritting my teeth, I pick a crate out of the bed as well, and follow him inside.

We’re going to finish this conversation, whether he likes it or not.

The story continues in Chapter 13 - Part 2.

A/N: Here is a list of translations for the French terms/expressions:

Kiara

Oh, mon dieu! = Oh, my God!

Était-ce vraiment nécessaire? = Was that really necessary?

Si grossièrement = so rudely

Schweitzer

Ne vous inquiète pas, Demoiselle = Do not trouble yourself, m’lady

Drake

Bordel de merde = lit. ‘brothel of shit’ (I know - I love French swearing 🤣) English equivalent is ‘for fuck’s sake’

Permatags (let me know if you want to be added):

@twinkleallnight @lovingchoices14 @kingliam2019 @petiteboheme @aussiegurl1234 @queen-arabella-of-cordonia @tessa-liam @alyshak92 @secretaryunpaid @princessleac1 @walkerdrakewalker @angelasscribbles @drakewalkerisreal @nestledonthaveone @tinkie1973 @twinkle-320 @lunaseasblog @indiana-jr @knaussal @differenttyphoonwerewolf @eversoaringqueen12 @pinklipsandmasonjars @sillydg @spookycolorpeanut @peonierose @mrsnazariowrites @shellybee85 @3pawandme @honey358luv​ @atha68 @deepestphantomstranger @xpandass420x @choicesficwriterscreations @ficloverevie @alexabeta @minicraftywitch @lolablackwrites @ivyflowers13 @anahoreva

(Less Than) Noble Intentions only (let me know if you want to be added!)

@thetruthisthatiloveyou @anakjaybon-blog

#harper gale #drake walker #drake x mc #less than noble intentions #the royal romance #trr fanfic #choices fic writers creations #cfwc fics of the week #maxwell beaumont #hana lee #king liam #kiara theron #Spotify

[trainofcommand]

Tell us more of the cowboys and golden retrievers retrieving a weird scientist

Well, okay then! :)

Cracky flash ficlet: Retrieved, with Science (Cam Mitchell, Jonas Quinn, Rodney McKay, two golden retrievers, cowboys 1950s AU).

"Those are some dumbass dogs for a cowboy," some idiot once said to Cam, his face scrunched up with disgust and derision. "Dumbest cowboy dogs I ever seen," he'd reiterated, drawing out the 'dumbest' into a slow drawl, and punctuating it by spitting a mouthful of tobacco on the ground.

The dogs in question – Killer and Fang – had looked up from where they'd been curled on the stoop of the little cabin where they all stay in the off-season, their mouths open, panting happily, exhausted from a long day of doing whatever the heck Cam had wanted them to do. He'd looked at the dogs, looked at the idiot who was talking, and figured to hell with him. Then he'd punched that idiot right in the mouth, smiling the whole while.

He'd kept on smiling while the guy spit out blood and a tooth, and smiled a little wider when Fang got up and ambled to stand between them, tail wagging, canines showing.

"Oh darn," Jonas had said when he came 'round the front of the cabin, buckets of fresh water from the well in each hand. "Insulting the dogs, huh?"

"Yup," Cam had replied, wiping his bloody hand on his shirt.

In the evening light, Killer and Fang's fur had gleamed golden, and so had Jonas's sun-bleached hair, and the idiot had looked at them all, thought better of trying anything, and walked away.

---

The truth is, golden retrievers make great dogs for a couple of cowboys out on the range.

They're loyal.

"They sure are," says Jonas.

They're energetic.

"Oh, definitely," Jonas agrees, as he bends to give Killer a good scratch.

They'll chew a man's leg off, just for the fun of it.

"Well, I'm not sure I agree with that one." But Jonas is smiling, so Cam doesn't have to argue about it.

And finally, they look fantastic in bandanas. Wholesome. Fetching. Downright red-ribbon-winning. "Heck yes, they do," Jonas says, nodding vigorously as he ties a new red bandana around Fang's neck. Cam likes it – the red looks great against Fang's fur, it makes her easy to spot from a distance, and it'll hide any blood after she sinks those teeth into an interloper's arm, or leg, or whatever's in biting distance that gets in her way.

"Ah, sure, Cam," Jonas says, stepping away and observing Fang's new look.

---

"Well, this is interesting," Jonas says, the evening that Killer trots up with what looks like a stick in his mouth. Turns out it's not a stick at all, unless it comes from a tree made of metal and covered in numbers and lines. Cam's seen a lot of trees out on the range, and he's never seen a tree like that.

Killer's path is followed, a few minutes later, by a guy who's huffing and puffing a little bit, his face red, his hands dirty, and his mouth yelling.  

Cam listens for a while, arms crossed, taking in the swearing, the exclamations about their sub-standard camp, the demands for something to eat, the admonitions that their food stores are inadequately out of reach from invasive wildlife, the complaints that it's now too late to safely get back to his own camp so he's going to have to stay with them for the night, and the accusations that Killer took an instrument that cost more than 'whatever the hell it is you two are' make in a month, which is really inconvenient, because there's science that needs to done.

Eventually the guy stops talking, mostly because he's alternating between chewing on a biscuit and tearing into some dried jerky. But even as he's eating, he's looking expectant, like he's waiting for some kind of response.

So Cam shrugs, reaches down and takes the metal instrument out of Killer's mouth and says, "Not like we can expect much else. He's a golden retriever."

Jonas nods and holds out an apple, just in case the scientist-guy is still hungry. Jonas is real welcoming like that.

Science-guy scowls but he takes the apple.

---

Cam doesn't listen much while science-guy and Jonas talk details. Mostly it's boring. Plus there are golden retrievers curled up on either side of him, the cattle are lowing in the distance, the sun's starting to sink below the horizon, and all together, that's just bound to make a guy sleepy.

"That is very interesting, Dr. McKay," Jonas says excitedly, not for the first time. "Right, Cam?"

Cam just hums because it'll make Jonas happy, and leans back against a tree stump, already dozing off.

---

Science guy heads out in the morning with several warm, freshly-baked biscuits wrapped in a bandana in one hand, his metal stick instrument thing in the other, two apples in his pockets, and what Cam guesses must be the minimum amount of grumbling and complaints that he allows himself each morning. He leaves behind some a whole bunch of quiet, which Cam is real grateful for, and a jaunty wave from Jonas, accompanied by, "Have fun with your science, Dr. McKay!"

He doesn't leave behind Killer, who gamely gets up, stretches, and trots off after him, tail held high and wagging. And that's a real son of a bitch, because Fang is going to get lonely, and Killer was wearing Cam's third-best back-up emergency bandana.

"So much for loyalty," he mutters, watching man and dog disappear into the edge of the forest.

Beside him, Fang rolls onto her back, kicking her feet into the air and flashing her fierce canines. "Don't worry," he tells her. "Next time we meet him, I'll let you gnaw his leg right off." She kicks her back feet a little harder, baring all her teeth, and wagging her tail so hard it makes her lose her balance, rolling onto her side.

Then she picks herself up and shakes, loose fur and pieces of grass flying everywhere, and she looks deadly as hell.

Cam feels real proud.

#i don't even know #cam mitchell #jonas quinn #rodney mckay #flashfic #my fic

[rockislandadultreads]

NoveList Combo: Haunting Literary Fiction

Did you know NoveList is a database you can access with your library card to find reading recommendations? Find your next favorite read with this fantastic readers tool! Check it out on our website here.

Life After Life by Kate Atkinson

What if you could live again and again, until you got it right?

On a cold and snowy night in 1910, Ursula Todd is born to an English banker and his wife. She dies before she can draw her first breath. On that same cold and snowy night, Ursula Todd is born, lets out a lusty wail, and embarks upon a life that will be, to say the least, unusual. For as she grows, she also dies, repeatedly, in a variety of ways, while the young century marches on towards its second cataclysmic world war.

Does Ursula's apparently infinite number of lives give her the power to save the world from its inevitable destiny? And if she can - will she?

This is the first volume in the "Todd Family" series.

The Orchardist by Amanda Coplin

You belong to the earth, and the earth is hard.

At the turn of the twentieth century, in a rural stretch of the Pacific Northwest in the foothills of the Cascade Mountains, a solitary orchardist named Talmadge carefully tends the grove of fruit trees he has cultivated for nearly half a century. A gentle, solitary man, he finds solace and purpose in the sweetness of the apples, apricots, and plums he grows, and in the quiet, beating heart of the land--the valley of yellow grass bordering a deep canyon that has been his home since he was nine years old. Everything he is and has known is tied to this patch of earth. It is where his widowed mother is buried, taken by illness when he was just thirteen, and where his only companion, his beloved teenaged sister Elsbeth, mysteriously disappeared. It is where the horse wranglers--native men, mostly Nez Perce--pass through each spring with their wild herds, setting up camp in the flowering meadows between the trees.

One day, while in town to sell his fruit at the market, two girls, barefoot and dirty, steal some apples. Later, they appear on his homestead, cautious yet curious about the man who gave them no chase. Feral, scared, and very pregnant, Jane and her sister Della take up on Talmadage's land and indulge in his deep reservoir of compassion. Yet just as the girls begin to trust him, brutal men with guns arrive in the orchard, and the shattering tragedy that follows sets Talmadge on an irrevocable course not only to save and protect them, putting himself between the girls and the world, but to reconcile the ghosts of his own troubled past.

The Paper Palace by Miranda Cowley Heller

It is a perfect July morning, and Elle, a fifty-year-old happily married mother of three, awakens at "The Paper Palace"—the family summer place which she has visited every summer of her life. But this morning is different: last night Elle and her oldest friend Jonas crept out the back door into the darkness and had sex with each other for the first time, all while their spouses chatted away inside.

Now, over the next twenty-four hours, Elle will have to decide between the life she has made with her genuinely beloved husband, Peter, and the life she always imagined she would have had with her childhood love, Jonas, if a tragic event hadn't forever changed the course of their lives.

The Snow Child by Eowyn Ivey

Alaska, 1920: a brutal place to homestead, and especially tough for recent arrivals Jack and Mabel. Childless, they are drifting apart--he breaking under the weight of the work of the farm; she crumbling from loneliness and despair. In a moment of levity during the season's first snowfall, they build a child out of snow. The next morning the snow child is gone--but they glimpse a young, blonde-haired girl running through the trees. This little girl, who calls herself Faina, seems to be a child of the woods. She hunts with a red fox at her side, skims lightly across the snow, and somehow survives alone in the Alaskan wilderness. As Jack and Mabel struggle to understand this child who could have stepped from the pages of a fairy tale, they come to love her as their own daughter. But in this beautiful, violent place things are rarely as they appear, and what they eventually learn about Faina will transform all of them.

#literary fiction #fiction #haunting #library books #book recs #book recommendations #reading recommendations #reading recs #tbr #tbr pile #to read #booklr #book tumblr #book blog #library blog

[sunglassesmish]

For the song ask, 3 and 29?

thanks for asking! also to premise, this is going to be long, which I wasn’t expecting 😬 i honestly don’t expect you to read the whole thing, but it was a nice trip down memory lane. anyways here we go!!

3. three songs you were recently obsessed with

ooh i am so glad you asked this. i heard the song King by Years and Years a few days ago after i hadn’t heard it for a while and now i’ve been replaying it about 100 times a day. it makes me feel emotions i didn’t know i could. i’ve also been listening to We Could Go Back by Jonas Blue just as much. another one i’ve been obsessed with is Friends by Why Don’t We.

and if anyone is reading this, whenever i find songs i like, they tend to come from the same album, band etc so then i add them to a playlist. and then when i get bored of them i make a new one and forget about the rest, so you’ll probably notice most of my songs i’ve been obsessed with this past month are by Jonas Blue and Why Don’t We. i am also a basic bitch so my favourites are mostly pop songs.

29. three songs that influenced you most (some songs change or save lives)

okay so i haven’t had any songs (that i can remember) that have had much of an influence on me except making me feel better on bad days. and my old favourite songs are spread between at least 4 spotify accounts and i’m using apple music for the time being so i don’t remember many.

but i can say that Crush by Jennifer Paige was a song i heard on a cockles youtube video, and i’ve started to associate hearing that song with them. so i’d say that one. another that has influenced me a little was Dinero by Trinidad Cardona because I was on a summer programme and was pretty lonely if i’m being honest, and I bonded with a guy over us both loving this song. he also looked extremely similar to the singer, so every time I listen to it I think of him. unfortunately i don’t communicate with him as he doesn’t own a phone, and we went our separate ways :(

and finally, the last song that has influenced me is Smooth Criminal by Michael Jackson. now this is gonna be a weird story. so there I was on instagram, and as a teenager I made friends with a person roleplaying as a female character from One Tree Hill (weird coincidence because of Danneel, who was on the show) but I watched a video of them (the actual person) singing the song and I thought wow that song is so catchy! anyways, yes I hadn’t heard that song before then, and I don’t know what happened to that person. i was really stupid back then.

#anon #ask #thank you for this #even if i ranted

[plungermusic]

“Well, I found it now: you’re like coming home…”

… after the vanished #13 and the not-quite-normal atmosphere of Covid passes (and autumnal temperatures) of #14, Maverick #15 was back in its rightful July slot and all was right with the world. Maverick always had a more domestic familiarity than your bigger impersonal festivals: less commercial, more relaxed, and that was all the more welcome this year.

Part of that familial familiarity is a rolling cast of favourites who return year on year, and it was one of those, the seemingly ubiquitous Lachlan Bryan, who with his band The Wildes was opening the festival on the Barn stage with a rollicking Oz Badland outlaw ballad as we passed heading for the Moonshine to catch the Drew Young Band (below), another returning artist.

Their set drawn largely from his long awaited album Bourbon & Bad Decisions showcased his rich molasses-and-whiskey timbre (they don’t call him the Americana crooner for nothing) against easygoing Eaglesy ambles like Falling Down, the brisk Petty-meets-CSN stride of Try Me with its tight harmonies courtesy of Kelly Bayfield, and Fix My Broken Blue’s Little Green Apples-via-Laurel Canyon hybrid, with some lovely pedal steel-mimicking guitar from Andy Trill.

Back at the Barn, a brand new name for Plunger (and Maverick) was San Franciscan artist/producer Mickelson (above): an impassioned songwriter with a fantastically sinewy Springsteeny vocal as evidenced in the protest of UNarmed American, the cleverly jerky off-kilter beat and piano underpinning of Jagged Tooth and a Bruce-cum-Neil epic sprawl Hercules And Ironman with hypnotic banjo from Scott himself. Probably Plunger’s discovery of the festival.

The Blue Highways (below) are well known to Plunger, although we’d always somehow missed the chance to see them live before. Another band who mine a rich seam of blue collar New Jersey epics (although stripped by necessity of some of the big production frills of Long Way To The Ground) there was still bags of Brucey bombast in the gritty vocal, expansive riffs, and frequent stop/start, quiet-bit-and-slow-build-back moments in Only A Matter Of Love and He Worked, as well as a highly impressive near a cappella opener, Tonight My Love.

Dirty Cello got huge appreciation (and not a little dancing) at the Peacock with their crowd-pleasing hillbilly hoedown two-step takes on popular favourites like Gimme Shelter, Proud Mary, Devil Went Down To Georgia, reminding Plunger most of a raucous cello-led Hayseed Dixie (and not really our thing!) A bit more polish came from Karen Jonas (below) back at the Barn. The slow Nashvilletastic waltz of Out In Palm Tree Paradise, a rattling cover of Johnny Cash’s Big River and the full-on Patsy-Clinesque cry-into-your-beer break-up farewell of Country Songs spelt ‘country’ with a capital C… marvellous!

Despite a brief moment of “wait a minute… this is BLUES!” (cf everything Plunger have ever written) at her Hookerish opening number, Kara Grainger (below) delivered a soulful set at the Barn with a notably Crayish cover of Breaking Up Somebody’s Home, and a slow TTB-like southern soul take on Storyville’s Good Day For The Blues with some judicious subtle slide to allay our fears.

Passing the Peacock gave us the briefest hearing of The Baskery, a frankly bonkers but skilful Swedish banjo-led jug band that mixed everything from slick late-Mac multi-part vocals and freeform trancey noodling to a rockabilly-beat-backed The Damned riff topped with Andrews Sisters harmonies. Oh, and an a cappella rendition of a 17th century Swedish folk song, as you do…

With the Barn headliners Vandoliers carrying on the same hell-for-leather stomp vibe of Dirty Cello, Plunger opted for the mellow duo The Black Feathers (above) down at the Moonshine. Two voices with restrained guitar accompaniment held the crowd spellbound down by the waterside, with high Old Time harmonies on an apt Down By The River, surprise covers like a junkerdash run at Spirit In The Sky, the slick Jackson Browne-does-trad-folk Lighthouse On Fire and the fragile heartbreaking harmonies and pauses of Strangers In The Dark. A particular favourite was the confessional rehab song Holy Water with its call-and-response duetting and atmospheric Crosbyish chords… you could have heard a pin drop (were it not for the oompa-oompa drifting down from the Barn). A suitably chilled close to day one of Maverick #15.

#Maverick Festival #americana #drew young #drew young band #mickelson #blue highways #karen jonas #kara grainger #the black feathers

[falconparadise]

15 Minute Story of the Day-The Last Apple Tree in the World

If Jonas put it off any longer, he wasn’t going to be strong enough to manage it. The apple tree was the only source of food for miles, all the other trees were contaminated. He couldn’t risk walking across the contaminated lands and hope that he found another source of food that was safe. He might have to walk for days. There was only him, and the apple tree he had been sitting under when the world ended.

Maybe the apple tree was contaminated too, Jonas’s mind sometimes whispered. Just because it didn’t have weeping sores like the other trees (weeping what, Jonas did not know) did not mean that the tree was safe to eat from, but if Jonas had told himself that the choice was dying in five years from cancer or dying in the next few days due to starvation, well, it wasn’t really much of a contest. 

Jonas started by eating those that were easiest to pluck off the tree, then he’d jumped to reach those that were a little higher. After that, Jonas had to rely on the squashed and rotting apples from the ground. He would have liked to climb the tree to gather the apples that were higher up, but the greatest shame of Jonas’s 8 year old life was that he’d never managed to climb a tree. His friends had tried to tell him where to put his hands and feet, where to stand, but he never got further than the bottom most branch, but he was too scared to go higher. He didn’t know why he had this fear of high places, there was no traumatic memory he could blame it on. He was simply a fraidy cat. 

A couple days previous, Jonas had eaten the last of the apples on the ground and had been praying for one to fall down like it had in the story of Isaac Newton. None had fallen and he could hear the birds up above and knew they were probably eating them. 

Jonas steeled himself, he had to climb the tree. He took a steadying breath, placed his foot where his friend had showed him the summer before, and pulled himself up from the good hand hold branch the tree had. As he stood up on the thick and sturdy first branch, his vision blurred and his breathing quickened, but he steadied himself before ascending further. The sound of the birds was so loud and close, just from being up amongst the leaves. Sun dappled the bark and warmed it. Inside the leaves you could almost pretend everything was alright. 

Jonas stood on his tiptoes and reached for an apple--green and full and ripe.  

9/9/2022

#writblr #writing #short story #15 minute story #scifi #speculative fiction #post apocalyptic

[alsjeblieft-zeg]

445 of 2022

Created by joybucket

Do you regularly....

paint?

draw?

drink coffee?

drink tea?

curl your hair?

straighten your hair?

pray?

read the Bible?

worship?

play online games?

watch movies?

watch television?

read books?

daydream?

Would you ever....

dye your hair a wild color?

get a tattoo?

get a piercing?

bungee jump?

skydive?

dance in public?

sing a solo?

travel to Africa?

ride an elephant?

travel to Europe? (lol)

travel to Asia?

travel solo?

travel to New York City?

ask out your crush? (too shy for that, sadly)

Can you....

sing?

dance?

play an instrument?

touch your nose to your tongue?

lick the tip of your nose?

do the splits?

do a cartwheel?

draw?

write neatly?

write in cursive?

speak another language?

whistle?

pop your fingers out of joint?

read minds?

Are you....

lovely?

beautiful?

double jointed?

artistic?

bold?

boring?

encouraging?

loving?

nice?

positive?

passive?

passionate?

ambitious?

sensitive?

honest?

romantic?

intelligent?

unique?

creative?

generous?

miserable?

optimistic?

pessimistic?

mentally ill?

sane?

weird?

different?

special?

anointed?

Do you like....

math?

tea?

coffee?

English?

writing in cursive?

creative writing?

to dance?

to sing?

to pray?

chocolate?

smoothies?

sushi?

pie?

playing Truth or Dare?

Have you ever....

tried to redo your room to make it look like a room you saw on Pinterest?

tried to give yourself a hairstyle you found online?

set up a prayer corner in your room?

had an imaginary friend?

written on the side of a bathroom stall?

fallen asleep with your clothes on?

fallen in a pool fully clothed?

gotten sick from inhaling nail polish remover?

realized that life is amazing?

thought about ending your life?

cried in public?

sat on a rooftop with a friend?

written a letter to a celebrity? (when I was 10 or so)

wished on a shooting star?

Do you remember....

Gigapets?

Pikachu?

Pokemon cards?

Furby?

pogs?

the show Taina?

the show Caitlin's Way?

when the Spice Girls performed on All That?

when the very first episode of Spongebob aired?

what you were doing on Sept. 11, 2001?

Aaron Carter?

N Sync?

choker necklaces?

"LiveStrong" wristbands?

Did you ever....

play with Barbies?

own an American Girl doll?

watch Nickelodeon?

obsess over a celebrity?

crush on a celebrity?

have imaginary friends?

play tag?

take swimming lessons?

take ballet?

take piano lessons?

have the flu?

have to go to the hospital?

dream of running away as a teenager?

get picked first in gym class?

Do you/have you listened to...

Avril Lavigne?

Carrie Underwood?

Taylor Swift?

Paramore?

Black Eyed Peas?

A-Teens?

Play?

Aaron Carter?

The Backstreet Boys?

The Spice Girls?

S Club 7?

Hillsong?

Casting Crowns?

The Jonas Brothers?

Have you ever played...

Monopoly?

Truth or Dare?

Heads Up 7 Up?

Red Rover?

Tic Tac Toe?

Four Square?

Apples to Apples?

Chutes and Ladders?

Bingo?

Uno?

Go Fish?

Never Have I Ever?

Two Truths and a Lie?

If You Really Knew Me?

Roller Coaster Tycoon?

American Girls Premiere?

Operation?

Candy Crush Saga?

Mahjong Titans?

Yahtzee?

YoVille/YoWorld?

Mario Party?

Mario Kart?

Zelda?

The Sims?

Pac Man?

Ski ball?

poker?

beer pong?

Do you like these names (for a girl)?...

Skye

Skylar

Eliana

Claire

Sierra

Madison

Peyton

Aurora

Bianca

Joanna

Siona

Felicity

Ellery

Epiphany

Do you like these names (for a boy)?....

Deklan

Dylan

Denver

Dallas

David

Adam

John

Spencer

Ryan

Storm

Scott

Justin

Meverick

Brennan

Would you ever dye your hair...

dark brown?

light brown?

blonde?

gray?

white?

purple?

pink?

green?

teal/turquoise/aqua?

burgundy?

red (the natural hair color red)?

red (as in, bright red)?

magenta?

periwinkle?

Would you ever get a tattoo of...

a cross?

a peace sign?

a quote?

someone's name?

a heart?

something insignificant?

a skull?

a flower?

a Japanese symbol?

a continent?

an elephant?

an awareness ribbon?

a fish?

stars?

What are you allergic to?

dust

pollen

mold

pet dander

mosquitoes

bees (if so, how do you react to them?) // just swelling

peanuts

tree nuts

another food

a medication

latex

grass

a type of glue or paint?

something else (if so, what?)

Have you ever been...

bullied?

excluded?

persecuted?

harassed?

molested?

abused?

raped?

assaulted?

yelled at?

shoved?

hurt?

heartbroken?

sick?

shy?

embarrassed?

loved?

complimented?

insulted?

discriminated against? (yeah xenophobia)

hugged?

attacked?

fired?

homeless?

close to being homeless?

manipulated?

lonely?

isolated for a long and unhealthy period of time? (yeah 2020 lol)

neglected?

ignored?

Do you believe in...

the supernatural?

angels?

demons?

God?

Jesus?

The Holy Spirit?

Heaven?

Hell?

yourself?

aliens?

genies?

fairies?

mermaids?

werewolves?

Do you consider yourself...

beautiful?

spiritual?

religious?

gifted?

talented?

unique?

free-spirited?

gentle?

free?

alone?

carefree?

alive?

blessed?

spoiled?

#survey #bolding survey #categorised survey

[rjalker]

It's so creepy. My poor baby. Nothing I google gives me anything even remotely like this.

If anyone knows what this is, please let me know! It's on an apple seedling that is only a few months old, in Pennsylvania. I poked it with a plastic spoon and its hard, not squishy or anything.

It's only covering the bottom side of the stem shown here.

#undescribed images #plants #gardening #pests #diseases #plantblr #apples #apple tree #apple tree pests #apple tree diseases #:( #Jonas the apple tree

[starlost-andfound]

Thank you for tagging me @kym-truestory <3 (I just started a new thread)

For any Apple Music Users-  on the app, if you type up a letter on your Library on your phone/any device I believe and click search, there will be options like Artists, Playlists, Songs etc. So you can just click songs to find a list of song titles starting with that letter :)

Rules: spell out your url with song titles, then tag as many people as there are letters in your url

I have never hated my url more. Here we go-

R - Real Love Song by Nothing But Thieves 

A - Amsterdam by Nothing But Thieves 

N - Nightmare by Halsey

D - Details by Maisie Peters

O - Oxytocin by billie eilish

M - My Moon by Jess Benko

L - La Vie En Rose by Edith Piaf

I - Introduction by Jess Benko (one of my favorite introductions to an album)

M - Mariposa by Peach Tree Rascals

E - Emily by Jeremy Zucker and Chelsea Cutler

L - Lover, Please Stay by Nothing But Thieves

I - is your bedroom ceiling bored? by Sody and Cavetown

G - Graveyard by Halsey

H - Happier Than Ever by Billie Eilish

T - This Night We Met by Lord Huron

X - Xanny by billie eilish

X - X by the Jonas Brothers (ft. KAROL G)

X .... I ran out of songs for this one.

tagging: @chilling-seavey @jonahlovescoffee @stuffofseaveyy @hopinglimelight @romqnticizer @the-girl-who-cried-wolf @johermione @tinyegg @21burritoseavey @tefilovesreading @thatfangirl42 @hiya-its-amber @kenobi-baby @angelmarais @averysbestyears @slowdownatthelotusinn @socialfake​ @seaveyscolors​ @seavey-siren​ and anyone else who wants to join! besides the long list of songs I had to find, this was fun 

#I never struggled so hard to tag people in my entire life

[cowboydrag]

When I left the long field I went between the four apple trees we called our orchard, and along the path toward the creek. My box of silver dollars buried by the creek was safe. Near the creek, well hidden, was one of my hiding places, which I had made carefully and used often. I had torn away two or three low bushes and smoothed the ground; all around were more bushes and tree branches, and the entrance was covered by a branch which almost touched the ground. It was not really necessary to be so secret, since no one ever came looking for me here, but I liked to lie inside with Jonas and know that I could never be found. I used leaves and branches for a bed, and Constance had given me a blanket. The trees around and overhead were so thick that it was always dry inside and on Sunday morning I lay there with Jonas, listening to his stories. All cat stories start with the statement: “My mother, who was the first cat, told me this,” and I lay with my head close to Jonas and listened. There was no change coming, I thought here, only spring; I was wrong to be so frightened. The days would get warmer, and Uncle Julian would sit in the sun, and Constance would laugh when she worked in the garden, and it would always be the same. Jonas went on and on (“And then we sang! And then we sang!”) and the leaves moved overhead and it would always be the same.

shirley jackson, we have always lived in the castle

#shirley jackson #we have always lived in the castle #0122

[sasa-gay-yo]

Just Us (Chapter Fourteen: Forget)

← Chapter Thirteen

His homecoming wasn’t eventful, nor was it welcomed by the others of Trost. They came back in the night, a tenth of what they left with, and yet people were still up to throw things out the windows at the Scouts as they proceeded to their base. I wasn’t awake for that part, and Jonas thought it was best to not wake me. He told me the next morning that he’d locked eyes with Levi and he almost shrunk away from the window. Jonas thought the rage he saw was directed at his presence, and he was probably half right, but the other was just towards the world in general. 

He didn’t come into the cafe the next morning like he usually did. No. I was sure the Scouts would stay out of Trost for a while and their own safety. It never made sense to me though. The people of Trost would rejoice that the famine was over but in the same breath blame all hundred-some Scouts for not being able to protect millions of people. I held my tongue, giving the everlasting fake smile. There was no reason to fight anymore. They were home and most were safe. Levi was safe and in one piece and I would probably see him tonight. 

Five months after they left. 

Flowers were already growing out of the ground, and there was no need to wear a jacket anymore. Sometimes, I would go out and sit in the meadow facing the Scouts HQ, just like Levi and I had before. I would allow myself to sit and think clearly. Sometimes, I would sneak to the Scout HQ and feed the horses that were left behind for various injuries, evading the one Scout they left for the same reason. I’m sure the young boy knew I was there, but he seemed to not mind. I took feeding the horses off his daily to-do list. I wasn’t happy by any means, but after getting Jonas back, it made it easier to be alone with my thoughts. 

“You don’t need to stay tonight, Jonas,” I told him, putting the chairs up so he could sweep the floor. He gave me an annoyed look, but nodded, understanding why. 

“Just don’t forget about me even if he’s back,” it was a low whisper so he could try to hide the begging nature of it. I knew better than to let Jonas go this time. 

“Don’t worry. How could I forget about your ugly face?" His mouth went wide and I laughed. Before I could dodge, a wet rag flew at my head, narrowly missing me. 

That night, I sat on my couch reading some random book, waiting for a knock at the door. My heart was beating the whole time, and I couldn’t focus on the words I was trying to read. It had been so long since I’ve seen his face. Since I felt his touch. I wish I had some drawing to be able to look at his face instead of imagining him through his cursive or button-ups. Maybe I’d ask him to get one. There were random men who sat in the Trost city square and drew people for money. Maybe I would get him one of myself too, knowing that the small stitches on his cape wouldn’t last long. My mind was swirling with ideas, trying to keep it occupied. When the clock on the wall hit three in the morning, I was losing hope. In my hands now was the journal I’d faithfully written in for five months. It was the first thing I’d give to him, showing that I was still devoted despite the distance. Even if it was hard for him to read it, he told me to do it, and I did. Every single night I did. I wondered if he’d done something similar, but he probably wouldn’t want to share with me, nor recall the days he had outside of the walls. 

At eight in the morning, Jonas had let himself in after yelling up from the very full cafe. He saw me sleeping on the couch, the journal still in my arms, no indication that Levi had been there. When he woke me up, I could tell there was pity in his eyes. I shied away from it, going to get dressed to work. I gave him the benefit of the doubt. He’d just gotten back and it was hard to get into Trost without ridicule. He’d come eventually. I already felt more at ease knowing that he was alive anyway. 

The next night, he didn’t come either. Then the next. Then the next. It turned into a week. Then another week. Every day, I would wake up and give him excuses. I would smile at Jonas and ask him how he slept. I would stare at his table in the cafe, now occupied by a different customer. Once the time kept ticking on, I knew that there wasn’t anything holding him back from coming. There wasn’t anything holding back from sending some letter or note with Erwin’s private service either. The only thing holding him back was himself, but I didn't want to come to that reality. How could someone who'd left me the way he did, lingering touches on my doorstep, not want to come back?

That’s how I ended up at the Scout HQ stables again. Their numbers had dwindled again, and by Levi’s past letters I knew when mandatory lunch service was. Again, I felt alone as the wind blew through my hair, yet this time I was staring Levi’s horse in the eyes. The horse that almost bit my head off. I could see she was injured, and I reached out to pet her nose, giving an apple I’d brought from the cafe. She seemed to be thankful for the offering and let me into her stable without a problem. I slipped the journal into a cubby with some riding supplies, hoping he’d see it sometime. Before leaving on Jonas’s horse, I glanced up at the windows of the abandoned castle, the sun reflecting in them enough to blind my eyes.

“Ma’am, what are you doing near the horses?” I looked down at the cadet who was left behind. He knew my face by now, but he seemed not afraid to confront me anymore. I raised one hand to him, the wind picking up around me, blowing my skirt up. 

“I’m just leaving. Don’t mind me.” He held his hand up, beaconing me not to leave before I could answer whatever questions he had. I didn’t hear what he was yelling at me as I rode back towards Trost. Hopefully, he would report that someone was near the stables and Levi would find my notebook. If anything, I wanted him to read that. If he saw how sad I was without him there, then maybe he would come back quicker. 

“It’s been how long?” Jonas asked as I returned his horse later that night. He taught me how to ride it a month ago, seeing how I could only use public transportation to get to Mitras, which took money and hours. While I was still unsettled getting on anyone’s horse, Jonas’s was nice to me and I fed it extra apples for good measure. I was doing that right now as he brushed her out. 

“Almost three weeks since they’ve come back.” He nodded and continued to brush, not pushing the obvious response. Jonas had gotten much better at that. He’d let me think when I needed to, and then only when I was getting beside myself he would jump in. There wasn’t any need to do that right now, and my mood had gotten more control over the past few weeks that he didn't need to do any intervention work recently. 

“It’s almost May Day. There are enough supplies to celebrate this year, so Trost is having a little festival to make up for Spring.” I pet the horse on her nose before hopping up on the stable’s door to sit. 

“Are you asking me to go drink with your friends since no one did it for the Equinox and now there’s an excuse?” He huffed once in laugher, trying to feign his innocence. 

“No, I was just going to ask you if you were free next week for no reason. Drinking? How dare we? We’re getting too old for that sort of stuff.” I smiled lightly down at him as he put away the horse’s brush to turn to face me. 

“Sure, I’ll go. It’s been a long time since I’ve been out.” A big smile broke out on his face when I agreed, and it seemed to carry all the way into next week. He would never stop reminding me that on Saturday, we would go to the festival to grab drinks and take them outside to the meadow near the walls. At one point, I had to bar him from talking for a few hours so I could get work done. When the day finally came and I closed the shop, he was bouncing off the walls watching all the people walk to the town square. 

“You know, usually we’re taking Elias and June to these types of things,” I reminded him and he just shrugged. June was probably working and Elias would be with his school friends running around. We’d probably see him on our way out of town. 

“When they turn eighteen, I’ll gladly take them for their first drunk meadow excursion. It’s a right of passage.” You rolled your eyes at him, remembering his first time puking at the base of a tree in the meadow. A right of passage, sure. 

Jonas’s friends were a rowdy bunch. They were that way in high school as well and never changed how many years out we were now. While you weren’t very much involved with them unless forced by Jonas, you knew the four of them well enough to be comfortable to drink with them. Two of them, Jonas’s roommates, brought girlfriends or girls they were trying to entertain with. Again, I didn’t know them all that well, but I’d be sure to ask Jonas as we walked behind the rest. 

It was refreshing to be out like this, as we walked past the Garrison to be let into Wall Rose. The atmosphere was up, some of the boys having already downed a few drinks, and everyone seemed happier than before. The news of millions of refugees dying didn’t affect them, so why did they have to feel sad about it? In moments like this, it made me think of my own existence and how selfish it was to do these sorts of things. We were exploiting the safety of Wall Rose to go and drink, not thinking at all about titans or a food shortage anymore. I wanted to apologize to the refugees whom I served previously, but they were undoubtedly all gone. 

“Hey,” Jonas nudged me, probably seeing my glazed-over expression, “Live in the moment?” He suggested as the wind picked up around us. The grass blew in the breeze, and we turned to walk against the wall. The meadow near the wall was only a few minutes walk, and near a village of farmers. One time, during a game of truth or dare, Jonas was dared to go pick a farmer's pumpkin, which ended up with him being chased a good half-mile from where we were original. The only person who waited for him to get back that night was me and we both got scolded for how late we had returned. Ben was also very suspicious of how dirty Jonas's pants had become and later he guilted me into telling him everything that happened, minus the underage drinking.

“I’ll try,” I told him, pushing away the thoughts I had before. Selfish. The refugees weren't able to separate their life from the certain death they were facing by the titans. They weren't able to go off and celebrate like we were. Imagine if Eren Jaeger could see me now. I could see the anger lighting up in his eyes knowing what we were doing. I looked out into the wild expanse of grass, knowing right where the Scout HQ would lie over the hills. What would Levi be doing right now? It was around dinner time for them if the breakdown of his schedule was still accurate. Would he approve of the activities I was about to indulge in? Probably not. 

“Eva,” Jonas said again, snapping me out of my thoughts once more. His expression was now concerned, but there were shouts as we reached the destination, those already buzzed excited to get even drunker. Laughter rippled through the air and the wind carried it further along the wall, echoing. It was a weird sound for me to hear, and I realized then how long it had been since I’d even left my sphere of influence. I’d been to the capital a few times for supplies, and I’d visited the Scout HQ twice, but those were all by myself. I haven’t done anything with other people for a long, long time. I used that fact to try to convince myself that I deserved this break as I took a sip of the cheap wine that was brought. 

They all talked and talked about their lives, whatever drama was going on around in their shared friend groups, and how many people were getting “panicked married” as Hulia, one of the potential girlfriends put it. I agreed with them, nodding my head and inputting some opinions here and there, but I was never engaged in the conversation enough to start my own. I would just sip and sip, not minding how much Raphel was filling my cup with. 

The more I drank, the more it made me think about Levi. Why hadn’t he come and visited me yet? Did he not like me anymore? Had I done something wrong? Had something happened on the expedition? Did he find someone else? All of these were running through my head at hundreds of miles per hour, that when Jonas nudged me to answer a question Hulia asked, I had to make her repeat it. 

“When do you think you’ll get married, Eva?” She asked with no ill-intent, and there was a dreamy look of romance in her eyes with this question. I wasn’t the first one to answer the question, but I was also the only girl here that wasn’t with her boyfriend or whatever they were to each other. I wondered what the other two had said. Probably something cute and romantic. They’d get married in Trost, maybe move to Wall Sina, and start a happy little family away from the titans and away from conflict. There had to be something in there about flowers and picking out a dress too. Maybe I wished I listened to them so I could fake an answer and model it after theirs. If I was thinking realistically, my chances of getting married now were slim to none. At least, that was what I had gotten from Levi. Actually, we never talked about those things, and it became clearer and clearer why. First, he didn’t think he was going to come back from this expedition. Secondly, how were you supposed to dream about marriage when you don’t know what the next day is going to bring? 

So I lied to them and Jonas knew. The look in his eyes told me he knew what I was truly thinking.

“Sometime later in life. Not right now, but when I can settle down and hand to the cafe over to someone for a bit. I have no dress or inheritance from my mother, so that part will be quite difficult.” Hulia was digging me further into a grave, not feeling my discontent or seeing Jonas's stare.

“Oh, Eva!” She clasped her hands together, “I think you’d look beautiful in a white dress! You can have Ben walk you down too and you can have those blue flowers that you always love to have in your cafe. It will be one of those small intimate marriage ceremonies, you know? When I get married, I have so much family I don’t know where I could fit them all!” I gave her a look, but she was too drunk to realize the weight of her words. Was she bragging about how big her family was to me? I had half a mind to tell her off, and of course, the wine was fueling me. How many glasses did I down while looking into the fading horizon?

The others were now running around in the field, playing some sort of game like the kids their wine-filled brains told them they were. I used to be like that when I was drunk. I’d play tag or truth or date or some type of game that children play in school. Arguably, that was before I swore off drinking after getting so drunk I couldn't stop throwing up the next day. Now here I was, thinking randomly about the end of the world while staring off into the setting sun. Jonas wasn’t with them either, and I knew my attitude made him barely drink. He just sat next to me, leaning back on his hands, trying to find the words to say. 

“Do you think the world will end because of the titans or because of the humans?” He sighed and let out a ‘what the fuck’, before entertaining me. He knew I was drunk.

“Humans.” I shook my head, disagreeing with him. 

“I think it’ll be because of titans. Want to know why?” He picked at the grass but indulged me. 

“Why?”

“Because they’re already trying to ruin my life.” That made him pause, take the wine glass out of my hands, and down the rest of it for himself in one gulp. He was right, I didn’t need any more of that, or my true feelings were really going to come out. He probably still wasn't emotionally ready to hear me drunkenly babble about Levi when he could barely stand it sober. 

“What do you want to do about it?” I knew he was asking about the titan problem, but I remembered a conversation we had earlier. It had now been another month. Six. The same amount of time I’d waited for him last time, but the thing was last time he came to me right away. He loved me then, holding me at night on the couch. What was so different now? 

“I don’t want to do anything because I want him to come to me on his own, but I’m afraid if I don’t do anything, he won’t come.” He moved to sit up completely, trying to see the expression on my face. 

“And if he doesn’t come?” I could hear the faintest hint of hope in his voice, and it made me laugh sadistically. 

“I don’t know. I’ll spiral into madness again. Something like that.” He groaned and leaned back fully on the grass, hands behind his head. That was what I meant by not being able to handle it. 

“Do you want to know my opinion now that you’re drunk?” I scoffed. 

“I’m not drunk, but sure. I haven’t got much left to be sad about, give me more.” I went to take another sip, but the glass was emptied and so were the rest of the bottles we’d brought. This just left me to stare at whatever game the couples were playing. 

“I think he’s an asshole and doesn’t deserve the patience and kindness you’re giving him.” It sounded a lot calmer than I thought it would come out. I knew that already, though. I knew what Jonas thought of Levi, and that sentence was an extremely abridged version. I would always hear him mumble profanities and insults here and there about him whenever he was brought up, and I heard some of his famous opinions from Ben too. However, some of his opinions did get to me, mostly about the wait. Why was I waiting for so long? I thought about that too, late at night. What motivated me to stay with Levi even though he’s been away from me for at least a year in total. The time we’ve been together has been so small, and by now, I’m usually making breakfast every morning for the man I’m seeing. That’s what had happened before.

“You thought that about Kristian, too, and he was your friend.” Jonas froze next to me, having not heard that name exit my mouth in years. He thought it was an unspoken rule I’d given him to never mention Kristian. It was probably because I was drunk that I brought his name up, and this situation felt eerily similar to our past best friend.

“Well, Kristian wasn’t in the Scouts when you were with him. Same complaint, different circumstance.” The sun finally made its descent below the horizon, and the purples that spread throughout the sky masked the tears falling from my eyes. I hadn’t thought about Kristian for a while either, but something about this moment reminded me of him. One because, again, I'd picked someone over Jonas who didn't agree, and, two, because of what Jonas had said back then that he'd said before. He just thought that, now, it was taboo to bring in Kristian. 

“When you asked me if the pain was really worth the love, it made me think about Kristian.”

“Oh,” Jonas nodded, easily remembering how Kristian and I had left things, and how his death made it impossible to make things any better. Regardless of his death, Kristian wouldn't have been forgiven.

“With him, it wasn’t. I was always in pain near the end. He was too domineering, too chaotic; he was everything I was running away from. He was the temptation to turn back into what I once was, and it always excited me to teeter on that line with him. Thrilling maybe, but toxic. He crossed that line, and I stayed where I was. The pain back then wasn’t worth the two or three laughs Kristian would give me throughout the day.” There was a silence, both of us not knowing what to say to that. Kristian was gone, and he had been gone for years now. It felt wrong to speak on his name like that, but he deserved every bad thing that came to him. We both knew that too. 

“Kri-”

“I don’t feel that with Levi, Jonas. Right now, most of the time, I don’t feel the regret I felt back then when I was stuck with Kristian. But then I think, maybe I don’t feel it now, but down the road, I’ll feel it again. That scares me, because I really, really like being with Levi. When I’m with him I’m happy, but when I’m without him I can barely function. It’s codependency in a way. I was codependent on Kristian, and look where that got me. I don't want to be codependent on Levi, and I don't think I am right now, but it could be that way. I also just think I feel so awful now because, for five months, Levi was out fighting titans with no way of me knowing if he was dead or alive. It's not codependency but worries. Logical.” 

“So, you’re saying that you don’t feel like Levi is like Kristian, but you’re afraid that it might turn into that if things keep going the way they are?” I picked at the grass, not caring that tears were slowly falling down my face, making permanent trails. Actually, it had been a few good weeks since I'd cried about something. It felt like a good release now, and because I was far gone on wine, I didn't feel the depth of my tears. It was like I was just crying to cry, and not because all of the feelings I had when I was with Kristian were coming back. Not because I was scared it would turn out that way. 

“They were both Scouts.” He hummed, putting one of his hands on top of mine to stop my nervous picking of the grass. He was concerned, and you were glad the coming darkness hid your tears. If he saw them, he would take you back immediately. He would pull you up, makeup up some lie to the others, and sit me down on the couch after we got back, not holding me anymore, but just sitting to my right, a hand over mine. 

“This is very not me to say, but have you told Levi about this?” 

“What do you mean? About what?” He bit his lip, decided whether to say something or not to me. He always bit his lip when he was holding back something for my mental benefit, but I wanted him to say it. I needed him to say it. Something to snap me back to reality. 

“Does he know that your greatest fear is abandonment?” I pulled my knees to my chest, not liking out that sentence made me feel emotional. I’d like to say it was the wine that made me start crying even more, but I knew that wasn’t true. Jonas had broken some flood gate inside of me, finding the root of the problem was having. I was afraid of being abandoned. That was the real reason I’d work at the cafe hours and hours on end. If Mr. Flynn saw how I was a good worker, he would forget about my previous bad behavior or bad grade and he wouldn’t throw me out on the street again. If I just gave into Kristian’s physical wants and did what he said, then he wouldn’t leave me like before. He’d stay then. But now, I couldn’t think of something that I did or was doing to Levi. Was I making him face his feelings too early? Did the fact that I was weak and not a Scout deter him from coming to see me? I would do anything to fix it. To make him come back. Jonas just sat there with one hand on my back for what felt like forever. The laughter in the background took on a new cynical tone as I sat there in juxtaposition to their fun. I was thankful, too, that the sun was finally down, so in their drunken haze, they had no idea what was going on to the right of them.

The next day, I rode back to the Scout HQ, and seeing that the notebook I’d left two weeks ago was still there, I took it back with me. I had no idea why I felt like this, but I just needed to take it. It was like I had given him a three-week opening to my heart, and since he didn't take it, I'd take it back. If he wasn't moved to come back after reading it, if he even read it, then he didn't get to anymore. I really didn’t know what to do when I slammed it on my desk, along with the letters he wrote me previously scattered on the surface. I’d read them over and over again, trying to rationalize why he wouldn’t come back even when he wrote words as sweet as those. It had to have been the refugee expedition. Something had to have happened then for him to not want to see me, perhaps even ever again.

For the first time, I was angry at him.

He couldn’t even bless me with two minutes or a piece of paper to display his feelings towards me. He was hiding again, but this time there was no injury to hold him away from me. Jonas said he looked fine, and in one piece, and for the longest time I was glad. That was enough for me to get by; waiting for him. Waiting. Waiting. Why was I always waiting for him? In a burst of anger, I picked up the book and threw it across the room, hitting the blackboard with battle formations on it. The blackboard that Levi used when he was here. Everything that he left was still there, but now I knew the papers must not have been important if he didn’t come back for them. I shoved them back in the drawer, one by one, not caring if I bent them. What use would they have anyway? Next were the letters. I was going to keep them, I wasn’t that mad to ruin something this important to me, but I didn’t want to see them anymore. They would go in the drawer along with his papers. Lastly, I picked up the notebook that I threw on the floor. Five months of pain, and he didn’t have the decency to read it? This one, I let my fingers run along the cover, remembering how I wrote in this night after night. I could feel the pain come from the leather it was bound in. I remembered the moments I would just hold it, reading over my won words, and crying again. I flipped open the pages, skimming the words I wrote again for one last paintime. 

The last page didn’t have my handwriting on it. The very last page of the journal, the only one left blank, was now covered in that familiar cursive scrawl. I lifted a hand to cover my mouth, not knowing what feeling I had inside. He had read it… but even so, he didn’t come back. How long had it been since he’d picked up this notebook till now? 

 Evlynn M Flynn, 

I’m sorry for everything I’ve done to you. For the ways I’ve made you feel inside. Reading this journal made me realize how much I hurt you. I’m sorry for everything. For giving you false hope and hypnotizing feelings. It was never my intention to make you feel like this adding my presence in your life. Find someone who gives you true happiness, because it will never be me. 

Levi 

 What was this? He'd read it. Yet, I wasn't happy. I was the opposite of happy. I stared down at it, reading it over and over. The tears started to make the ink run on the page and I reached down to rip it out, crumbling it in my hands. Is this what I wanted? Some note? Some proof that he cared? And wasn’t I thinking the same things? His lack of presence caused me pain. His not being there hurt me emotionally and physically. I had written that in the notebook. We had read the same notebook, the same journal entries, so why did he interpret it so differently? Him leaving was going to be the best solution? Did he not see how I was lost without him there? 

I was angry. 

So much so that in the dead of the night, right after dinner and right after I'd gained the courage, I hitched up Jonas’s horse without him knowing. When the Garrison members stopped to ask where I was going, I just glared down at them and rode past the gates into Wall Rose. I knew that there would be cadets everywhere on the ground until my past visits. They would see me riding up, some might even stop and question me, but I had one motive. I was done waiting. What person tries to leave someone by leaving a short note? Is this how cowardly Humanity’s Strongest was? 

I rode on the HQ grounds, not breaking the horse's stride. The cadets turned to look, not ever seeing my face before. They probably turned to each other, asking about my presence, but I was past them too fast to notice any conversation. When I jumped off the horse, leaving someone else to take care of it, the same cadet I’d encountered before called out to me. He had to be a groundskeeper or something to always be chasing me off. Either way, I started up the stairs that I’d only walked up once, him behind me yelling. He never caught up, and when I turned the corner to the officer’s wing, he sounded even more frantic. If it was after dinner, the officers were sure to be in some form of meeting, and I wasn’t going to let them continue. Whatever it was, they had weeks to talk about it. This was a more pressing matter. 

“Please! Ma’am! The officers are-!” I shoved open Erwin’s door with ease, hearing it slam against the interior wall. They all turned their heads to look at me, all sitting around a table, a map in the middle displaying figures of titans and horses. Some I recognized and others I had no clue who they were, but I wasn’t looking at them. I stared down Levi whose eyes were as wide as he would let them. Had he forgotten he’d told me his schedule or was he surprised that the sad, depressed me had displayed this much effort to see him?

“Commander! I’m so sorry I let her get in here! I can take her away if-” Erwin held his hand up and was inspecting the look on my face. He knew there was no stopping me at this point, my breathing growing heavy as I looked back up at him, waiting for whatever orders he’d give me. Did he know why I was here? 

“Squad Leader Hange, can you take Miss. Flynn to your office, please? The meeting won’t go on for more than ten minutes.” Hange stood, pushing her glasses up to their original place, before walking over to me with a smile. She put one hand on my shoulder before speaking to me.

“Come on,” she said in a hushed tone, pulling me down the hallway silently after dismissing the cadet. There was tension there, but I couldn’t tell why. Did she know why you’d suddenly appeared? 

Hange’s office was different from Levi and Erwin's. Glassware, chemicals, and books were thrown everywhere with no organization. There were drawings of titan structures hanging all over the walls too, barely leaving the white brick exposed. The biggest difference was the fact that there were candles and oil lamps everywhere, illuminating her workspace and the room. It felt warm but did nothing to calm my anger.

“You know, I told him not to do it.” It didn’t make me feel any better, even if that was her intention. It made me think of how many other people he’d talked to about this besides myself. She walked out after that, closing the door behind her and leaving me to stand in the middle of her office, looking at the books sprawled out on the center table. None of them really made any sense to me, filled with anatomy or certain titan sciences, but it still was a welcomed distraction from the conversation to be had five minutes in the future. I flipped through her hypothesis about titans and sunlight, a few things about their internal body, and other more complicated diagrams. I never knew Hange was this scientifically inclined, all I knew was that she was the designated doctor for the Scouts since the government thought it trivial to send them a real one. Come to think of it, there was nothing in this office that even hinted at medical care, meaning Hange probably just picked it up for necessity. 

Levi never told me much about the people in the Scout Regimen, probably for isolation purposes. I’ve only talked to Hange three times, and Erwin only once when he personally came to visit the café. It was interesting to see them in their natural habitat here, and I had to agree that the look Erwin first gave me when I stormed into their meeting was scary. He was the Commander though, it was his job to demand and control. Levi had called Hange a Squad Leader once, and I wasn’t able to ask him what that meant, but it was probably close to his rank as she was also in the officer’s meeting and had an office like this. Notably smaller than Levi’s it was still an office. Standing here now, I wished I’d known more about the place I stood and maybe about titans. 

“What are you doing here at this hour?” It was harsh and I was paying too much attention to Hange’s books to notice the door had opened and Levi came in. Still, I didn’t react to his words and just kept staring down at the book. Truthfully, I didn’t think I’d get to this point, and everything that I had rehearsed on the way here had left my head and had been replaced with slight happiness at finally seeing him again. It had been so long. There he was, standing unscathed, his eyes looking down at me. How badly did I want to run over there and throw my arms around him like the hug we shared when he left?

“Are you not going to talk to me? Isn’t that why you interrupted our meeting?” I wondered if he was happy to see me at all, but it didn’t seem like it. His voice was hallow and distant. There was no emotion in his eyes at all as I looked over my shoulder at him. He just leaned against the wall, arms crossed, looking right at me. When I, again, didn’t answer, he sighed and closed his eyes, eyebrows knitting together like he was the one allowed to be frustrated. 

“If you’re not going to say anything, I’ll just leave. I have a personal meeting with Erwin.” He turned to open the door and that’s when my whole body turned to face him. It was a tactic, after all, just to get me to finally respond. He probably didn’t have anything to do other than paperwork, Erwin knowingly dismissing him. I held out the crumpled piece of paper out in front of my body and he took one look down at it, knowing exactly what it was. I had no idea how he thought he wouldn’t have to confront me about this personally, but he did seem a bit… annoyed? 

“I’m glad you read the journal, but I was not happy to find this in the back.” He sighed, turning away from the door and back to me.

“You need to forget. Forget about the Scouts. About the HQ. Everything. Forget about me.” The paper dropped from my hands, and I lost the composure I was holding in before. 

“You read through that whole journal and that’s what your solution was? To leave?!” His eyes shifted to the door, knowing someone outside was probably listening, so he kept his voice down. 

“Being with me hurts you, and it will continue to hurt you the more I have to be gone. You told me once that you’d be fine if I died, but after reading your words, I know that won’t be the case. You need to forget me now so I can’t hurt you more in the future.” I gripped my hands into fists, not believing what I was hearing. I could take it in written form, but I had thought up until now it was a mistake. 

“You know I don’t care about that!”

“But I do.” His voice was calm this whole time, showing no emotion. It was like he’d reverted before me. All the work and effort I’d put in to make him comfortable to share his feelings around me was crumbling. I couldn’t tell what he was feeling when he was saying these hollow words to me. 

“What happened? What happened between when you left for this expedition till now for you to think like that?” 

“Watching millions of people die in front of you makes you think about who you can and can’t protect. If I can’t protect them when they’re right in front of me, how am I supposed to be able to protect you?” I huffed in anger, looking at the ceiling as tears were threatening to fall. I was not about to cry in front of him. Not when he was giving me no emotion. He didn’t deserve mine. There was no regret or remorse in his voice either when speaking about the refugees. This was not the same man who had confided in me on the couch about how opposed he was to this mission. 

“You don’t need to protect me. I’m in Trost, I’m surrounded by other people, and you’ve taught me how to defend myself. Most of the time I’m with Jonas anyways. There’s nothing to be-” Levi seemed to catch something in my sentence and ride with it. The worst thing possible. 

“Go be with him.” That made me pause and blink. This couldn’t be real. There was no way he would have said that before. 

“Who are you?!” I yelled, feeling the frustration build and build. 

“I read the journal. Over and over. And every time I got to the point Jonas came back, you were happier. Over and over, I read about another man making you happy.” My mouth was wide open when he said that. Still, it was emotionless. What did he really want? It couldn’t have been that. It would have never been that. He'd vocalized his distaste for Jonas over and over again and now he was just yielding to him? This was not Levi.

“Jonas is my friend. You know that. You make me happy, Levi! So why are you taking that away from me?!” He shook his head, pushing himself off the wall. 

“He can give you what I can’t. You want a family, kids, whatever, I can never give you that. How can I think of my future when I know I’m not going to have one?” I put one hand on my head, finally getting a headache from everything he was saying. He wanted to let me go because he didn’t want to hurt me? Because he couldn’t give me what I wanted? Yet, I’ve told him so many times that all I want is him. He's agreed, too. He's told me what he feels for me. How deep he feels for me. And now he was going to throw that all away so easily? Levi was never someone to do something like this. He would never let me go this easily. 

“You’re not my Levi. Whoever is talking right now, you aren’t him. Levi would never say something like that!” 

“You’ve only known me for a total of four months, how do you know who Levi is?” I looked up at him fiercely, feeling that as an insult towards me. How did I not know who he was? 

“You’re not the Levi who fell asleep in my arms? The one who confided in me about his fears? About his past in the Underground? The one who kissed me every night with unyielding passion? That wasn’t you? Was I housing a stranger?” He scoffed this once. Just once, he gave me what he was feeling. He scoffed at me. He insulted me. And now, after I told him that, he couldn’t even look at me to deliver the final, heartbreaking line. The line that made me stop speaking and stare at the ground. The line that haunted me as I laid in bed that night, not being able to sleep. 

“The emotional codependency you have for me is stifling, Evlynn.”

That made me shake in anger, in sadness, I had no clue. It was the fact that he’d echoed my biggest insecurity out loud. Was I codependent on Levi for my happiness? I’d thought about it over and over, trying to get myself out of the five-month slump, but now, he just confirmed it. He confirmed that he hated it. I was stifling him. Everything he said before felt fake. It was an excuse to make me feel better about him leaving me, like it was even about me this whole time. He had written that note to hide his true feelings apparently, but how true were they? How could he go from holding me, loving me, to just... not feeling anything?

“T-then why are you… wh-why are you with me?” He still couldn’t look at my hunched over figure. 

“I only realized when I read your journal how dependent you are on me. It’s stifling. I don’t like it. I can’t deal with it when I have more important things to do.” It was like every word he said was a hammer, hitting me down lower and lower to the ground. I had to grip Hange’s table to stand, and even then it sent books flying to the floor. My heart was burning and so were my eyes. How could he be so cruel and brutal with me now? Was this the Captain Levi that everyone had talked about? The man you were convinced to be needy and kind was just now showing his true form.

“I want you to look me in the eyes and tell me you don’t love me.” I could see the way he froze. The way he still couldn’t look at me even when I was ready to lock eyes with him for the last time. I was staring right at him, the tears still yet to fall. I couldn’t show him emotion, it would be burdensome, wouldn’t it? Still, he didn’t look at me. It was stomach-wrenching the silence in the room as he thought over his answer.

“I've never told you I loved you.”

No, that was the line that haunted me. That was the one that I’d think about forever. Yet, that was the one that forced me out of the room. I just stood up, balancing myself before I walked right out the door. Right past his body, the one who still couldn’t look at me and show me his true emotions. I would never get to see it again. I stopped, right before closing the door, and looking right at Hange who was standing against the back wall, probably in wait. Had she known? That’s why she told me that when I’d entered her office. He had told her everything. He’d told her that he didn’t love me and I was too burdensome for him. How many people had he told before telling me? Coward. This realization gave me a false calm as I was falling apart inside. I needed to be strong in front of him. I couldn't show him how much he'd just hurt me.

“I love you, Levi. And if you deem that as codependency, then I don’t think you’ll ever know what love is.” Hange didn’t look at me after that, she looked right at Levi. I saw the look in her eyes too. Anger. At least I had one person here who seemed to support me. I walked past her, down the stairs, and out the door quickly, grabbing the horse that someone had hitched up for me. The cadets had all gone to their rooms, and the field was empty. This allowed me to walk out of the Scout HQ grounds, knowing that he would be looking at me from a window. I didn’t turn around though. I didn’t look back to see if he was there. I just rode back to Trost, holding in the tears I had till I was sitting in Jonas’s stable, feeding his horse an apple for everything she’d seen while I took her from her sleep. I just cried and cried, hiding my sobs in the back of my hand. Trost wouldn't get to hear my wailing for him. For that asshole. For that spineless, cowardly, annoying, handsome, kind - no. The only person who got to heard my sob was me and Jonas's horse. 

“What did he do?” It was an angry voice behind me, but I didn’t look back at him. I didn’t want Jonas to see me crying over Levi again and again like he had warned me about. I didn’t want Jonas to know he was right. So, I just stood there and cried, and only allowed Jonas to see my face when he came to hug me to his chest in comfort. We stood there for what seemed like forever, and he didn't speak for the longest time. I wanted him too. I wanted him to confirm how awful Levi was so it was easy for me to start to forget. But who was I kidding, how was I going to forget him? In an out of my life like a flash, but one so bright that I'd still see him when I closed my eyes every night to sleep. I would never forget Levi. 

“Shh, I’m here, Eva. I won’t leave you.”

xx oopsiesssss 

Chapter Fifteen →

Chapter Masterlist

#levi ackerman scenario #LEVI ACKERMAN #levi ackerman x oc #levi ackerman x reader #levi attack on titan #levi ackerman x you #attack on titan #attack on titan x oc #attack on titan x reader #shingeki no kyojin #shingeki no kyoujin levi #snk levi #levi aot #aot #snk x reader #snk

[thecaptainsgingersnap]

Piper Angela Pan

FC: Francesca Capaldi

Fic Title: Poison Apple Princess series

Nickname(s): Pipes, Lost Girl

Sexuality: Straight

Pronouns: She/her

Birthday: June 21

Height: 5'1

Hair color: Red

Eye color: Green

Place of Birth: Neverland

Hobbies: Exploring, photography, storytelling

Likes: Flying, nature, music, rocky road ice cream, dancing, harmless pranks, sunsets, beanies, fencing, climbing trees

Dislikes: ignorance, being stuck inside, ticks, pears, math, arrogant people, rain, pollution, make up, crowds, falling

Favorite Bands: Jonas Brothers, Taylor Swift, Katy Perry

Physical Quirks/Scars: scar on her forehead from falling out of a tree, climbs on things to reach stuff

Family: Peter Pan (father), Wendy Darling (mother), John Darling (uncle), Michael Darling (uncle)

Honorary family: The Bells, The Lost Boys

Friends: Terry Bell, Regina Grimhilde, Emberly Charming, Ryan Beast (@southsideserpentfairytale OCs), Denise Rider (@magicalmystery-muses OC), Ben, Doug Jane, Evie, Carlos, Ruby Fitzherbert

Love interest: Herkie

Optimistic or pessimistic: Optimistic

Introvert or extrovert: Extrovert

Occupation: High school student

Extracurriculars: Cheerleading, Student Council, Planning Committee

Favorite Animal: Chipmunk

Favorite color: Forest green

Favorite book: Around the World In 80 Days

Favorite food: Blueberry pancakes

Favorite movie/ tv show: (m) Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring

(s) Gilmore Girls

Background: No one ever thought Peter Pan would grow up, but everything changed when he met Wendy Darling. He chose to grow up with her, get married, and raise a daughter. Piper is every bit her father's child, adventurous, energetic, just a bit impish, but she also shares her mother's gentle nature and creative spirit. She loves exploring and dreams of travelling the world one day. Everyone who knows Piper will tell you what a great friend she is, but they'll also warn you not to cross her. She may be tiny, but she is fierce.

#Piper Pan #descendants OC #peter pan #Wendy darling #ben descendants #jane descendants #doug descendants #evie descendants #Ruby fitzherbert #carlos de vil #Jordan descendants #lonnie descendants #Herkie descendants #Regina Grimhilde #Terry bell #my OCs #Emberly charming #Denise rider #Not my oc #moodboard

[thegaybachelorsims]

LUCAS- “Well, Vincent, I do not think we will be meeting up later.”

VINCENT- “Okay, but why? And why in the world are you bringing that up here in front of my dad??!”

LUCAS- “It seems that your dad here, is also MY DAD!”

VINCENT- “DAD!? Is this true? Damn Dad, how many more siblings do I have out there that I do not know about??”

DON- “Yes, Vince, it is true. Lucas is your and Carlos’s half brother. But I had no idea until about a month ago. And he had no idea, I just told him.”

VINCENT- “Good thing!!  We were planning on --- never mind!  How many more dad?!

DON- “I am not really sure, son. I mean I knew a lot of women back in the day.”

VINCENT- “Seriously Dad! I mean last year you finally tell me about Lizzie Caliente being my sister, and now you tell me Lucas Storm is my brother? And you don’t know if there could be more!!? 

DON- “No judgment, Vincent, I mean the apple doesn’t fall too far from the tree!

VINCENT- “This isn’t about me----

DON- “Lizzie Caliente is my sister??”

DON- “Yes, but she isn’t aware of you. You haven’t slept with her have you?”

Unfortunately, Lucas made us turn the cameras off so we may never know the answer to that question. But this certainly adds some fuel to the fire, possibly? Will Vincent still align with Jonas to oust Lucas even though Lucas is his half brother? And will this alter Lucas’s motivation to shed a bad light on AJ? Again, we will have to wait and see. But, for now the show much go on!

#TS4 #TGB4 #TGB4AfterHours #DonLothario #LucasStorm #VincentSanna #Gay Simblr #thegaybachelor4