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#Kageyama x reader crack
tobxiyu · 5 months
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✶ BF TEXTS !
featuring. akaashi, tsukshima, nishinoya, shirabu, kageyama, kozume, hinata.
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© tobxiyu , 2023.
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leti666bigboss · 1 year
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featuring: the majority of karasuno
genre: crack mainly
warnings: cussing
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1zukuz · 1 year
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WRONG INITIAL !!
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HOW haikyuu boys react when you don't get their initial on your nails !
INCLUDES: cussing + fluff
ATSUMU, KAGEYAMA, BOKUTO, KUROO, SUNA, KENMA, OIKAWA
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lol if ur name starts with a y i apologize kuroo didn't mean it
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lilacrwses · 2 years
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▸ someone asks his s/o out
ft. multiple characters
genre: fluff, crack
notes:reblogs are a big help:>
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Would probably be the most calm among them. He would let you talk to the stranger, would be there if you'll be needing help. If the person asking you is persistent...then let's just say he's gonna be less as calm as before.
“I'm not sorry but my s/o has already told you that they're not interested. Why don't you go ahead and flirt with somebody that isn't taken, hm?”
AKAASHI, TSUKISHIMA, Sugawara, Suna, KITA, Asahi, Megumi, Terushima,
He'd be the one to give the stranger a unfriendly smile. I'll tell ya he has his eyes closed in a smile, it's probably creeping the stranger out. So before you could even reject him he'd be already scratching his nape in embarrassment slowly walking away from you.
“Well would you look at that, It hasn't even been that long since I've left you alone but you already have some ugly ass strangers flirting at you? Better keep you by my side baby, wouldn't want you to be with anyone else would I?”
KUROO, Tendou, Tsukishima, ATSUMU, Gojo, Geto, OIKAWA, Suna,
This mf doesn't even know that someone is flirting with you. You already told the stranger no multiple times but he wouldn't just go away. You'll either go to your boyfriend's arm and cling onto him or he would finally notice and teach the mf a lesson.
“What's up darling?-- Oh hello..? , I don't remember you being anyone of my s/o's friends, and I don't really know why you keep on bugging on my s/o either-- Although I appreciate it but you should be apologizing to my s/o not to me.”
Bokuto, USHIJIMA, Kenma, Sakusa, IWAIZUMI, Kageyama, NANAMI, Kita, Itadori, YUTA, Yaku
The moment the stranger steps closer to you it’s already finished. If the stranger would forcefully grab your hands he wouldn’t hesitate to throw a punch for you. Convinces himself that it’s self defense, probably would regret it a bit when he gets in trouble for that. But Hey! At least you’re safe.
“I hope that there won’t be a next time but if you even try to think about it I’ll be sure that you’re nose isn’t gonna be the only one that’s bloody.”
Osamu, MEGUMI, Atsumu, BOKUTO, Daichi, Geto, TANAKA, Ushijima, KYOTANI, Matsukawa
Would film the whole situation and would report it to the station after. The stranger apologizes but he’ll still report it.💀
“What am I doing? I’m obviously documenting this. You’re harassing an innocent citizen. Yeah you’re sorry, but I’m not. — Hey baby, are you ok?
SUNA
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eggyrocks · 2 months
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☆part one: is she hot?☆
m. list
fun facts:
yn found this apartment thru yachi and kiyoko
yn, yachi, and kiyoko are equally of protective of each other
yn and hinata stan nct in secret
noya and yn are like siblings
an: ok that's enough for today i hope this isnt garbage trash :))))))) if u enjoy pls feel free to let me know !! asks always open & reblogs appreciated <3
bonus:
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wonderoustime · 8 months
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you: i think i'm falling for you
them: then get up
kageyama (he genuinely blanks out for a second and just heard "fall" with zero context), tsukishima, suna, ushijima (he doesn't know what else to say), kiyoko
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fornshinoyaz · 9 months
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how to: lose feelings for an idiot
kei tsukishima x fem!reader
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how to lose feelings for a CERTIFIED, government approved idiot. it should be easy right? wrong. you are absolutely, positively, done for. you have no idea why you’re writing the guide book when you can’t even get past the first step! first step, the only important step really: don’t have your best friend be kei tsukishima. then maybe, just maybe, you’d have a chance.
or
where tsukishima is horribly oblivious to his best friend’s very obvious crush on him.
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status - ongoing :) !!
tags - best friends to lovers, college au, tsukishima lacks awareness, volleyball player tsukki, fluff at times, it’s very silly, takes no bullshit!reader, but also emotionally supportive!reader, pining, slice of life, slow-ish burn ? maybe ? i think it would be
tags (pt.2) - best friend!kageyama, childhood friend!yamaguchi, for the sake of au you all go to karasuno university (lmao) & the lineup is the exact same as in the series, the volleyball aspect doesn’t rlly matter much here
content warning - swearing, suggestive jokes, all in good fun
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CHAPTERS !!
01. how to: forget about a witch
02. how to: not get hit by a volleyball
03. how-to: breathe when’s he’s around
04. how-to: overthrow the government
05. maybe guides are overrated
taglist - open, send an ask to be placed on it :)
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simp4emo · 2 years
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Them reacting to a paparazzi pushing you…
Post high school: Hinata, Kageyama, Miya.A, Ushijima, Bokuto.
So I’m not really sure if volleyball champions usually get chased by paparazzi but let’s say you are surrounded by lots of ‘em.
Shoyo Hinata:
Checks if you’re okay first. Then, turns back to the person with his arms extended protectively in front of you.
“Hey! Please don’t do that!” He’d smile even though his tone stays firm.
Tobio Kageyama:
“Oi!”
He’d grab the culprit’s camera, with his large calloused hand and pull it down to better look at them dead in the eyes.
“Watch it!”
Atsumu Miya:
Does his best to stay calm. After taking a deep breath, he’ll turn back to the person and will force a smile.
“Hey… y’a better apologise now.”
Wakatoshi Ushijima:
Says nothing.
Gives culprit death stare while gently pulling you to him and leads you to the exit.
Kotaro Bokuto:
“Hey! Hey! HEY! BACK OFF! THAT’S THE LOVE OF MY LIFE! I’LL SUE YOU!!”
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keisukebajimipatron · 7 months
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My favorite Haikyuu moments
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This moment always makes me choke with laughter
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HAHAHA Tsukishima being himself
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And of course the meat dance
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Haikyuu!! but make it Greek Mythology
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summary: do i actually need to explain this? part 1 probably
featuring: multiple characters [atsumu, osamu, suna, kita, kunimi, hinata, kageyama, kiyoko, ukai, tenma, terushima]
warnings: crack
a/n: don´t take this too seriously, this is all in good fun ♡
haikyuu!! masterlist
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Atsumu as Apollo who´s sociable and loves entertaining the masses; adored by many, he has high standards and doesn´t give his time to those who don´t meet them; dedicated to his art to an almost obsessive level, always looking to improve and reinvent himself; competitive as hell
Osamu as Artemis looked as his brother and decided he doesn´t want to be like him, ever; he´s not afraid to go his own way despite what society might expect of him; not as in the eye of the public as his twin, even though he´s just as skilled (maybe even more so), competitive as hell, too
Suna as Hermes has the sitch on everyone; no embarrassing accident, gossip or campus fight (ahem ahem, the twins) is safe from him and you‘ll have to seriously bribe him not to spill the tea on you; a guy to steal sacred cattle with [a Greek mythology and German pun in one? Someone take the internet away from me]
Kita as Hestia keeps the peace in his team; doesn´t fancy himself particularly powerful yet his humility and steadiness is his strength; he places a high importance on family and togetherness and genuinely believes you can achieve more as team than on your own; overshadowed by the rest of his team but just might be the most vital member without whom everyone else would fall apart
Kunimi as Hypnos who just wants to go home and take a nap; has no energy for your bs
Hinata as Heracles who at the start of his journey didn´t get taken seriously by pretty much anyone; driven by his ambitions, he has to face numerous trials to earn his spot amongst the top but damn, does he work for it; in the end, nobody can deny his righteous place by the side of the best of the best
Kageyama as Midas whose every set he touches turns to gold; and while it might seem like a blessing at first, it manifested as a curse at one point, making him untouchable to everyone around him and eventually isolating him from his peers
Kiyoko as Helen which doesn´t need an explanation, honestly; beautiful enough to start a war over and fuel the jealousy of the goddess of beauty herself, yet there´s only one true love for her and everyone else gets shut down
Ukai as Chiron who is partly to blame for the new generation of monsters; while not all of his heroes -eh I mean players- go on to make it to the very top, you can’t deny the fruit of his labour when looking at the people he trained (and somewhat raised)
Tenma Udai (first tiny giant) as Pan created a dedicated cult and then dipped; his legacy is still inspiring others although nobody quite knows what happened to him
Terushima as Dionysus just wants to fucking party, man; if you´re not having a good time, what´s the point? 
Bonus:
Holly as Daphne who turned herself into a laurel tree running from Apollo aka her motivation to write an actual fic
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kkanabel · 1 year
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introducing sakusa kiyoomi x reader: social media (is a pain in the ass) - a kkanabel production
The new year has just started-- you're moving into a place with your closest friends after reaching the peak of your career. Now that you can afford to live in Tokyo, you can finally spend time with your closest friends and go out on the town to further grow your YouTube channel. It's time to have a new start in your new place and meet hot, rich people to be your possible future partner. This is the life to live; it's great being famous and living in a big city with your best friends!
Wait, never mind-- COVID-19 is in Japan? Fuck.
Well, at least there's this one hot guy you keep seeing on Tik Tok who keeps posting about cleaning.
Sakusa Kiyoomi x F!Reader
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This story will be told in multiple mediums– text messages, Instagram & Twitter posts, YouTube thumbnails, and the traditional form of writing. I intend for this sm!au to be different in comparison to others you may have read thus far. Please expect some fluff, angst, and crack in this fic. There will be plenty.
I gladly welcome constructive criticism and I love it when y’all message me. Also, as a new poster to Tumblr, it would be great if you reblogged and/or liked my posts. I hope you enjoy! 
- kkanabel
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-profiles- Team Y/N Team Sakusa
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-chapter directory-
the beginning :
chapter 0 - january 16, 2020
it's happening :
chapter 1 march 3rd, 2020 - week 1
do you want to build a sakusa? :
chapter 2 march 6th, 2020 - week 1
going "viral" :
chapter 3 march 7th, 2020 - week 1
taking opportunities (anxiously) :
chapter 4 march 10th, 2020 - week 2
??????? (coming soon!) :
chapter 5 march ??, 2020 - week ?
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leti666bigboss · 1 year
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I've been wondering how Noya's reaction would be if you looked at him for too long and when they asked you what's wrong you just said "you're so beautiful". You can write?
[10:27 a.m.]
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you were almost halfway through your maths class. the lesson was getting more and more boring with every word your teacher said and you were trying so hard to pay attention especially since your grades were already not at their highest, but you just couldn't. not when he was sat right next to you. giving up on whatever the teacher was babbling on about, you just let your eyes slowly shift to the boy beside you. noya had already had detention for two weeks straight and he couldn't venture to fail maths, so he was trying his best to focus on the lecture. the concentrated look on his face really accentuates his features; his brown slanted eyes, his eyebrows- slightly frowning, nose wrinkled, mouth sort of pouting. he wasn't understanding anything either, instead, he could feel your gaze on him. you were daydreaming, full-on staring at him, so when he turns around and looks at you a flush creeps up on your face. "what's wrong?" the question caught you off-guard, making you blush even harder, but something in the back of your head was saying 'just let it out', therefore that's exactly what you did. "nothing, you're so beautiful" now it was his turn to go red. but, noya is noya, trying to play it cool and all, he gave you a smirk while still somehow managing to stutter "y, you think so?" "yeah" awe transformed his face, maintaining the eye-contact. he just beamed at your answer, turning back to face the rest of the class, completely lost in thought. the small dialogue the two of you just had instantly gave him an ego boost, and though this idea might have not crossed your mind, you just made his whole entire day (entire week, actually).
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we-are-so-close · 1 year
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Another Appetizer
Kageyama x reader --crack, fluff wc: 1.2k author's note: this is for @milky-fixx . Tati, you deserve to have pro-athlete Kageyama Tobio buy you your own appetizer every time you go on a date.
The sun hung directly overhead, the sky a pale blue with no sight of a cloud anywhere. The day was warm, but felt much hotter on the rooftop patio with no refreshing breeze to cut back on the heat. The umbrella that jutted up from the middle of the table provided shade, but rays of sunlight were still able to pierce through. While you were happy to finally be trying this new restaurant that had been on your radar for months, you were more ecstatic to be there with your friend and longtime crush, Kageyama Tobio. If he wasn’t away for volleyball, you certainly had some school duty you needed to fulfill. Regardless, you were glad that the two of you were finally able to hang out. 
The more you stared at him, the more in thought he seemed to be. It was funny; you weren’t sure how someone could look like they were thinking about everything and nothing all at once. But sure enough, Kageyama never failed to surprise you. Trying to figure out what was going on up there was a mystery you weren’t sure you’d ever be able to solve fully. 
“Kags. Kags…Tobio. Tobio. To-bi-ooOO. TOBI!” you stated with some force in your voice. The change in volume and pitch effectively pulled him back to the moment with you. He stared at you, a little lost. 
“They brought the appetizer out.”
“Oh. Thanks,” he said as he took the whole pastry and popped it into his mouth. 
“Tobio!” you whined. 
“Whaght,” he mumbled, his face comparable to a chipmunk storing goodies in their cheeks. 
“I really wanted to try that, too!”
“Oh,” he swallowed hard, every bit of food slowly making its way down his throat. 
Quickly, he got up from his chair and towered over you. His eyes scanned your face and you stared right back at him. Without any warning, Kageyama’s lips pushed his way onto yours. You could feel yourself getting hot in the face. This was not how you imagined your first kiss with Kageyama going. For the first time today, you were grateful for being the only ones out on the patio. He slipped his tongue in rather forcefully, and it made you wonder if he’d done this before. 
A brief moment later, he pulled away and sat back down in his seat. 
“Did you get it?” he asked in a most serious tone. 
“W-what?”
“The taste of the pastry.”
“Is that why you kissed me?!” A new heat rose within you. 
“You said you wanted to taste it. So I thought since I just ate it, you might still be able to.”
“Kageyama, ew! I could just order another one!”
“Oh yeah, I guess you could have done that.”
A few moments of silence pass, the two of you staring off into different directions. The waiter finally came back out to check on the two of you. 
“Can we get another order of this?” Kageyama pointed to the empty plate before the waiter had finished his formalities. The waiter simply smiled and said, “of course, sir,” before clearing the plate and leaving once again. 
A few more minutes passed by and the silence was so awkward, even Kageyama took notice. 
“How has work been, ____?”
“Same old, same old.”
“Any funny stories?”
“Nope.”
“That’s too bad. Your stories are always really good.”
A few more minutes go by before the waiter comes back out with the second round of the appetizer. Kageyama’s gaze was boring directly into your soul. He was going to make sure you ate it and enjoyed it. What he doesn’t realize is just how uncomfortable it’s actually making you. 
“Is there something wrong with it? Why aren’t you eating it?” He asked with concern. 
“I can’t eat it with you staring at me like that.” 
He scrunched his face and tried to make himself smile a reassuring smile. You knew the smile. The smile that was more of a grimace or it looked like he was constipated. It was funny when he did it to other people. But now that he was doing it to you, it somehow wasn’t as funny. 
“Is this better?”
“Um, could you just close your eyes for a minute, maybe?
He gave a little pout, but obliged. You stared at the food on the plate. You wanted to know what it tasted like, but you needed to know something more. 
“Was that the only reason why you kissed me?”
“What?” His eyes flew open and immediately went back to analyzing your face. Tobio had never been the best at reading people, but he’d always been pretty good at understanding you. As best of a face you tried to put on, he could tell that something was up. 
“I guess I just ate it without thinking, and then acted without thinking,” he shrugged sheepishly.
A sinking feeling sat in the pit of your stomach, but you let out a soft chuckle regardless. “Is your brain even in there today?”
He squeezed his eyes shut again, seemingly trying to stop himself from saying anything else. You took the time to finally savor a bite of this pastry you’d been eagerly wanting to try. As soon as you took a bite though, Kageyama scooched his chair out from the table and, once again, startled you with a kiss. He pulled away with a look of disgust. 
“Uck, you have food in your mouth!” 
After you were able to stop your coughing fit and prevent yourself from choking, you looked at that man as if he had three heads. 
“Yeah, I had food in my mouth! Did you not see me take a bite?!”
“You told me to close my eyes!”
“Kageyama Tobio, you are going to be the death of me!”
He sat with his arms folded across his chest and pouted. A tinge of pink lingered across his cheeks. 
The waiter awkwardly cleared his throat as he was standing there with both of your meals in his hands. How long he was standing there, you couldn’t be too sure. He quietly set the plates down and turned on his heel as fast as he could. 
“This date is not going well,” Tobio finally spoke out.
“Date?”
“Yeah. I think it’s obvious I like you, dummy. You must like me, too, if you would wait months just to come try this place for the first time with me.” 
This was the most sensible thing you think he’s ever said. You were in awe. 
“Tobio, I-”
“I was hoping you’d want to be my girlfriend, but I have ruined that!” He threw his hands up, defeated. 
“Tobio, I-”
“I think about you all of the time; I can’t get you out of my head. I want to know what it feels like to experience new things with you. I-”
Now you cut him off with a kiss. No food this time, only the lips of two goofballs who like each other. 
“Tobio, I want that, too,” you said gently. 
“Really?” The tinge of pink across his cheeks turned darker and covered most of his face. 
“Really,” you paused. “But only if I can call you baby bird.”
“Baby bird?” He furrowed his brow. 
“Think about it,” you said as you sat back down and began eating your meal, a smirk plastered on your face. 
A second or two passed before your words finally clicked. 
“____, gross!”
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teamatsumu · 7 months
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kinktober 2023 -> day 5
mutual masturbation - kageyama tobio x reader
word count: 734
kinktober masterlist
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At first glance, and through the lens of a sports fan, he was the confident, bold rookie setter that just made the Olympics and took them by storm. Tall, lean, constant brooding look on his face. He was intimidating and sometimes downright scary.
But they didn’t know him like you did. His best friend since middle school and girlfriend since high school. They didn’t know how flustered he got around you, or how he would stutter over his words when you had just started dating. When you intertwined your hands for the first time, Tobio’s face had burst into flame and he hadn't said a word for hours after that, practically immobilized. And while your beginnings were very uncertain and hesitant, bashful smiles and red cheeks, no one could look at him now and believe how far he had come in terms of his physical confidence. Like right now.
His chest heaved as he sucked in deep breaths, slick with sweat and abs contracting every now and then. His biceps flexed as his arm moved, leading down to where his hand was tightly wrapped around his length, moving up and down at the exact pace you asked him to move. His hair stuck to his forehead, some of it sticking up haphazardly to give him the perfect disheveled look. His eyes, dark pure blue, trained on your equally naked figure, his lip caught between his teeth to hold back the noises that escaped his throat.
He was a vision.
“Keep going,” you whispered, knowing your voice would still reach him. He was hyper aware of every noise that you made right now, considering that you were the one talking him through this. “Run a thumb over the head- there you go.”
Tobio let out a cracked breath, and your eyelids fluttered at the sound. You were conflicted, because on one hand your fingers pressing into your core felt so good it nearly made your eyes fall shut, but there’s no way you could miss even a second of the sight in front of you. Your boyfriend laid out before you like a version of Adonis. How many girls would kill to be in your position right now? You weren’t going to pass this up.
“Y-you look so good.” Tobio breathed out, voice so low it rumbled in his chest. A simple compliment, but enough to make you clench around your fingers, knowing how Tobio struggled with his words. And the proof of how affected he was laid right in front of you. He looked absolutely wrecked.
You were nearing your end, and you didn’t want to reach it alone.
“Faster, Tobio.” You encouraged, curling your fingers deeper and harder inside yourself, using your palm to grind against your clit. You wanted to see him cum with you. You knew what that looked like, and god, you couldn’t wait to see it.
Tobio obeyed, tightening his hold around his stiff length, moving faster than he was before. Your breaths grew heavier, louder, occasional moans mixed in as you looked at each other, getting off on the idea that your bodies were turning each other on.
“‘M cumming.” Tobio grunted out before his body jerked, one muscular leg kicking out slightly as white hot liquid spilled from his tip, shooting far up enough to hit his chest. His whole torso heaved and his head dropped back, jaw going slack, hand still moving hard and fast so he could milk every last bit of his release.
There’s no way you could survive looking at the show he had just put on for you. Your eyes squeezed shut and you tumbled over the edge too, legs seized and fingers moving sloppy and fast as your juices coated your hand, shivers running through your spine, intense and so pleasurable. You moaned and cried through it, finally feeling your muscles relax when the feeling passed, leaving you blissfully tingly all over.
You were startled when you felt Tobio grip your wrist and ease your fingers from your hole, only to pop them immediately into his own mouth. His eyelids fell shut and he moaned around them, tongue flicking over the digits. You felt something inside you stir at the sight.
When Tobio dropped your hand and slowly sank his head between your legs, you let him without any protest.
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Taglist:
@bxbyyyjocelyn @thisbicc @lazuliquartz @dreamayy @kuroosluthoe @true-form-hoe @akumakitsune21 @cham0mil3-and-h0n3y @samisfunky @universal-s1ut @msbyomimi @dohwaesu @leothesquishy @n0tmykays @tsukiran @reyofsunshinelol @bleach-your-panties @galaneiaeris @leyra-giovanni @erenspersonalwh0re @peachesncats @soapsoftheworld @iwannabecamiloshovel @vintagevict0ria @smithieandy @moonlit-mizukage @snazzyturtles
A/N: For those whose tags arent working, im sorry! I tried and for some reason, your names wont show up in the mentions :( another way of being notified is to turn on my blog notifs for @teamatsumufics . I only reblog my fics there so it serves almost like being in a taglist!
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fornshinoyaz · 9 months
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HOW TO: LOSE FEELINGS FOR AN IDIOT
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01. HOW TO: FORGET ABOUT A WITCH
series masterlist | previous | next chapter
wc: 4.2k
how to lose feelings for a CERTIFIED, government approved idiot. it should be easy right? wrong. you are absolutely, positively, done for. you have no idea why you’re writing the guide book when you can’t even get past the first step! first step, the only important step really: don’t have your best friend be kei tsukishima. then maybe, just maybe, you’d have a chance.
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You were the go-to problem solver. The one with the all the answers. Someone’s cat died? You could help. Did you lose your job because of a stinky corporation? You could fix it. Your friend group of annoying volleyball boys were convinced, there wasn’t a problem you didn’t know how to solve.
But they were wrong. So so wrong. Because when it came to Kei Tsukishima?
Yeah, maybe you didn’t have all the answers.
Your best friend's ringtone yanks you from your sleep. You let out an exasperated sigh and begrudgingly answer the call, "Tsukki. I swear. This better be important or I’m going to kill you." You glance around your studio apartment, the world still hazy and unfocused around you.
"Did I wake you?" He asks.
"No shit sherlock," you grumble as you toss around in your covers, the warmth making you want to close your eyes again.
"Good. I'm not sorry."
"I know you're not, asshat. You know it’s my day off right? I want to sleep in for once," you say, trying to force back a yawn.
"I know."
The silence on the other side of the line really starts to piss you off. Did this man want anything or was he just being an asshole? While you enjoyed hearing his voice, you'd much rather hear it at a reasonable hour.
"Tsukki. say something or I'm-"
"She broke up with me,” he says, cutting you off.
You pause.
"What?" You ask again. Just to make sure you heard him correctly.
"I got dumped, Y/N. Over text."
You wince. Really? She couldn't even give him a call?
"Okay,” you sigh and lift out of bed, "I'll be there in 30."
And that's not a lie. You're dressed, ready to go, and in a taxi towards his apartment in 20 minutes and there in 10. You couldn’t say you were the biiiggeest fan of his ex-girlfriend. For obvious reasons. A small part of your heart cracked when he told you about her. It was a painful reminder that it would never be you.
The first time you met her, it was game night.
You came with Kageyama and Yamaguchi per usual. You carried the dip, they carried the chips. But when you three walked into his living room and found a woman - oh, you were sick to your stomach.
Kageyama gave you a look, that 'oh, damn, i know this shit sucks' look, while Yamaguchi tried his best to be friendly to her while checking up on you throughout the night.
It hurt. But you accepted her. Tsukki was your best friend. If he was happy, you were happy.
You thank the taxi driver and pay, before running up the steps of his apartment complex to the fourth floor. You had been there for several of your others friends during their breakups. Kageyama had been in the dumps. Asahi was even worse. But like always, you had all the solutions.
But when Tsukki opens the door, you're not sure what to say.
"Sorry...I got here... as fast...as I could," you say in-between breaths, struggling to catch your breath. Why did you run?
His eyes quickly scan you from top bottom. "I can tell. Your socks are mismatched. And is that my shirt?"
You insecurely cover yourself from his eyes. For someone whose suppose to be heartbroken, he had a lot to say.
"I hate to ask, but she really only sent you a text message? Like one?"
Tsukki nods. You shake your head, bewildered. Seven months and he only got a text?
"Did she say why?"
Tsukki's lips press together, and he shifts uncomfortably, "I never made time for her. Or something like that. I don't know."
"Oh."
You couldn't say you didn't see it coming. You knew from the moment you met her, it wasn't going to work. That wasn't your jealousy speaking. It was just the truth. But you didn’t have the heart to tell Tsukki that.
After all, he liked her. Was it your place to interfere? Maybe, but you wouldn't. It wasn’t that she was needy, and that Tsukki was cold, they both just needed and wanted different things that they couldn't give each other. His ex-girlfriend needed him around, but his schedule was demanding. It was no one's fault.
"Yeah. Can you come in? I don't want anyone else to see the abomination on your feet." He holds his apartment door open for you.
"Shut up. You look like an abomination," you mumble back.
He chuckles a little as you walk inside.
Tsukki's trying to act like he’s fine and for a moment you believe it. Everything seems normal with him. It was one breakup. But when you walk into his home and see clutter, you know it’s bad.
"What in the world..." you whisper, and you're sure he hears you. As you step further into his apartment, you catch the faint scent of his favorite jasmine tea. Something he only brewed when he was stressed. And then there's a lingering aroma of a convenience store meal. You walk by the familiar bookshelf you guys had bought. It was a pain in the ass to build. You both took five hundred breaks before completing one half of it.
"I haven't seen you in a while, Tsukki. You've started reading again?" You ask.
His eyes follow yours to the bookshelf, "A little. When I have the time."
A collection of books occupy the corner, some haphazardly placed with bookmarks peeking out, while others were still carefully arranged just the way he liked them. You raise an eyebrow as your eyes roam across the cluttered table next to it.
There are stacks of papers scattered about, a mishmash of calculations from his stats class, and crumpled attempts at writing essays. This was a mess. 
Kei Tsukishima was a lot of things—reader, asshole, the smartest man in the room (debatably), but he was not messy.
"Tsukki.." you half-attempt to take a seat on the couch, but it’s strewn with clothes and a half-unpacked bag.
"Hm?"
"Why is there-" you wince at the sight. How could you forget? Weren't they supposed to be heading to a nearby city for the weekend? She had terrible timing.
"Nevermind," you finish, but you've said enough to reopen the scar. He nods his head in understanding.
A lonely volleyball sat on the edge of the couch, staring at you, silently begging you for help.
‘work your magic,’ it seems to scream. ‘do something, anything, just fix him.’
“Are you okay? How many cups of tea have you drank?" You ask slowly, your eyes thoughtfully studying him as he moves across his apartment. You assume he’s getting another cup of tea. His hair is a mess, much like his apartment, and his face lacks any color, like a white canvas thrown away and discarded.
“I'm fine. Maybe three cups, or four, I haven't been counting," he says, but he walks past the clutter in his living room like it’s nothing. You make a face. You definitely need to help him.
Standing up from the couch, you reach for the volleyball and pass it around by your fingertips, "Tsukki, you’re a terrible liar, you know that?”
“I'm not,” he shoots back, stopping in front of you and taking a sip of his tea, “I told you, I'm fine. So I'm fine. Drop it.”
"You know I can't just drop it-"
"Yea, I know," he rolls his eyes, "But today? You can and you will," he cuts off.
You point to the area around you, and he sighs. You weren't gonna drop it.
"I can't! This place looks like crap!" You say, louder than you intended.
He narrows his eyes at you and places his mug on the coffee table, barely making enough space for it. “You look like crap on the regular. I don’t say anything about it.”
You gawk at him. Low blow. You hit him in the chest, making him hiss. “Stop being an asshole. I'm trying to help you."
"I don't need your help," he blows off.
You sigh. This was going to be difficult, "Reminder! You called me here! What did you call me for if you're not going to take my help!"
Tsukki averts his eyes and folds his arms against his chest, "Maybe I just wanted to spend time with you."
You give him a look.
He laughs, "Yeah, I know. I don't believe myself either."
"I hate you," you mumble, before refocusing on what matters, "if you don't wanna talk to me, you could try writing out your feelings?” You suggest.
Tsukki scoffs, leans forward, and steals the volleyball from your grasp, "Be honest with yourself, y/n. Do I look like I would ‘write’ out my feelings?”
You frown. How dare he steal from you. “Maybe if you did, you’d be less of an asshat. Strong maybe."
"Shut up," he rolls his eyes, "next option. Aren’t you suppose to be the notorious ‘problem-solver’? You say I have a problem, then fix it,” he says, heading back into his kitchen. You know he's being sarcastic, but you follow him anyways.
You pick up an old convenience store wrapper on the counter, "When was the last time you had a real, quality meal?"
He grabs it and tosses it into the trash, "A week, I don't know. Been busy. Studying. Volleyball. No time to cook. Is this how you problem-solve? By going through my trash?"
“No. It's not. Okay, Tsukki. Lets talk the next options,” you say. Tsukishima turns, leaning against his fridge, interested in what you’re going to say.
“You're gonna be officially enrolled you in my high-rated, greatly endorsed ‘how to’ class.”
Tsukki groans as if on cue. “Huh? I didn't sign up for this."
“First session! How to: Forget About A Witch!” You come up with the name on the fly. You’re sure it needs some work, but Tsukki doesn’t immediately throw you out of his apartment. That means he’s humoring you. For now.
“You can just say ‘bitch’, y’know.” He says through a smirk. 
“I don’t call woman bitches," you wave him off and start again, “How to: Forget About A Witch. Step one, Operation Clean!”
“No.”
Those were words you never expected to hear from him. Shocked for a moment, you quickly sputter, “Hey, you’re enrolled in this class now. You don’t get to say no!”
“I could throw you out right now,” Tsukki scoffs, but you firmly grab onto his elbow and lead him into his living room.
“But you won’t. C'mon. I know you. You hate all of this. I'll help you," you offer gently.
Tsukki looks like he was considering it for a moment, then he sighs and nods his head, "I want to, I just don’t have the energy.”
“Well,” you smile as you lift a book and put it back on the shelf, “I can be your energy.”
You love the way his corners lift into a smile. Then, the operation is on! You're pretty sure it’s working. You can’t help but notice how cute Tsukki looks as he folds his clothes, ensuring everything is perfectly neat. The way he arranges the decorative pillows on the couch makes you want to stay and watch him forever. Then, that smile. Oh my god. No. Focus! This is really not the time for distractions.
But your eyes keep wandering back to him. He seems so calm, so at peace in this moment. Like nothing else matters. You quickly avert your gaze when he turns his head.
“Is there something wrong?” He asks.
“Nope!” You say, turning around so he can't see the stupid blush that rises to your cheeks.
Damn it.
You snap back to reality, taking a moment to admire your hard work. With a sense of accomplishment, you survey the now-tidy living room. And it only took an hour.
“Now,” you flash him a million dollar grin, “onto step 2!”
"There are multiple steps?” He groans. Though he had asked for this, he wonders for a moment if he could rewind time. 
“Yes. It's a course. Step 2: Distraction," you announce, making him raise an eyebrow. 
“Will I like this distraction?” Tsukki asks as you gently guide him out of the kitchen and into the hallways. He only narrowly manages to grab his keys by the front door as you nudge him along.
“Of course. Don't you worry your pretty head about about a thing, princess. I'm gonna take good care of you.”
“Princess?” he repeats in disbelief. Tsukki reluctantly steps out of his apartment, and the cool afternoon breeze hits you both.
“Lets goooo!"
"As long as you promise to never call me that again."
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Yamaguchi called you magic once. That every single time you came, he felt like all his worries were gone. You get a text from him while in the taxi. It's simple and sweet. 'Is he going to be okay?'. It makes you smile. A few minutes later he follows up, 'If anyone can help Tsukki, it's you.'
But he never makes it easy.
“Ice cream…” Tsukki says slowly, eyes blinking from sign to sign of the different posted flavors. The tinkle of the door's bell went off behind them, alerting the workers to their presence. The cool air was refreshing to you both, a nice break from Japan's radiating heat.
Your eyes dart around the displays, your stomach wrestling with happiness, "Nothing says ‘screw you, heartbreak’ like a pint of soft vanilla!”
Tsukki focuses his eyes down on you, "Why do I have to pay to solve my heart break? Can I get a refund on this class?”
"Oh, please. Shut up,' the workers are amused by your banter, chuckling as you two approach the glass, "I’m paying, dummy."
“Oh," he smirks, "then great idea, Y/N. I love ice cream.”
“Uh huh. Now order, before my next How-To class is about hiding a body.”
You both thank the worker before finding a small table near the entrance of the shop. Light pools in from the large windows, making your ice cream look even more delicious.
"Thif ice cweam ish sho delishush," you say with a mouthful of the tasty treat.
Tsukki looks at you with a small chuckle, "Are you four? Eat with your mouth closed."
"I love vanilla,” you repeat once the last spoonful has made its way to your stomach. It was a never-ending classic. You never expected too much from it. It was sweet, simple, just the way you like it. It reminds you of your relationship with Tsukishima.
You both never expected too much from the other. You could go days, sometimes even weeks without contact. You both knew it wasn’t purposeful. You both got caught up in your own lives. It's just the way it went sometimes.
Every bite of vanilla is perfect. Tsukki hates the noises you make when you eat. He's side-eyeing you for the fifteenth when he finally says something.
“Do you have to be so vocal?”
“Yes!" You nod excitedly. If you were going to be shoved out of bed early in the morning, you might as well get some enjoyment out of the day.
You continue talking to him, honestly about something stupid, but as always, he listens. You hope it's helping, even just a little to take his mind off everything.
But then you both notice a couple passing by, their laughter echoing in the air. He looks at her like she's his everything. She looks at him like he's her world.
Tsukki’s eyes lower. Shit. Operation Distraction is going south. From beside him, it's almost like you can feel his stomach drop. It was like he was wearing his heartache on his sleeve to you. He puts down his cup of vanilla ice cream.
“I'm not hungry anymore. Here. I know you probably want more.” Tsukki says, trying stupidly hard to make it seem like he didn’t care.
You try to ignore what he's implying (that you're just a vaccum who will eat up anything, aka the truth) and frown. You place your hand on his shoulder.
His eyebrows furrow, "What?"
“This might have to be a two-day class,” you say softly. 
He pauses, and his eyes narrow, “I didn’t agree to spending this much time with you.”
You shrug your shoulders. "Should’ve read the contract of being my friend when you first met me,” you tease lightly, placing down your spoon and immediately reaching for his cup of ice cream. you both stand up, and you make sure you have all your things, before leading him back out into the small town center.
“I was seven. I didn't even know what a contract was." The bell behind you rings again as you exit. The Japan heat tickles your skin.
"Take it up with someone who gives a damn." You say as you look across the busy street for a taxi.
He sighs, surrendering to you and whatever plan you make for him, "Fine. Y/N. What are we doing tomorrow?”
You smile and he knows he’s in trouble. “It's a surprise~”
He frowns. “I don't like surprises."
"You're gonna like this one."
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The next day, you've got it all planned out. And of course you do. There was no room for post-breakup boredom. You stayed up all night, crafting the perfect Tsukki hits that would stay playing on his signature white headphones. Then, at 9 a.m. exactly, you’re at his front door step. You ring his stupid smart bell and look straight into his camera.
It clicks, showing it’s recording you. You give it an annoying wave as usual. The door opens after what feels like an eternity, with Tsukki squinting at you, wondering if he should slam this door in your face.
“Are you kidding me? Do you know what time it is? And can you stop making weird faces at my ring?” he complains.
You shrug playfully, not taking his complaints too seriously. “No, and no. You can sleep in the car. Get dressed, and let’s go!”
He does his little grumble, grumble thing but takes a nice shower that takes way too long. He gives you the middle finger as he walks around you to get ready. When he’s finally done, and dressed, you make it to the taxi you ordered. He asks you one too many times where the hell you're going. You ignore him every time.
“Here,” you say as you pull his headphones up from his shoulders and place them over his messy hair. “I made a playlist for you.”
He blinks, looking utterly confused. “You did what…?”
“Just listen,” you murmur, averting your eyes. He always manages to make things awkward as hell.
As you go through the ride, he stops talking. He slightly bobs his head to the music. You smile. All that hard work actually paid off. As you reach your destination and get off the taxi, you thank the driver, and Tsukki tips him generously. He always did, wherever you went. A restaurant, a cafe, if someone was working - they were getting tipped.
“Good playlist,” he comments, glancing around at the area you’ve brought him to. You find yourselves in front of a beautiful temple. “Have you taken me all the way out here to kill me? Why the fuck are we in the next city?”
You don't want to give him the real answer, so you bend the truth a little bit, "Chill, Tsukki. This isn't Criminal Minds. I thought we'd be tourists for a day. Thought you'd like it."
"Since when have you been this thoughtful?" he asks with a scoff. "Did the real Y/N die?"
"Eat shit. Come on," you say, walking down the hill toward a street buzzing with activity. It was the weekend, so the crowds were to be expected. But you knew Tsukki wasn't fond of crowds, which is why you planned to take him somewhere calmer.
"I'm serious," Tsukki continues as he catches up to you and walks beside you. "Did the real Y/N get replaced by an alien or what?"
"Real Y/N is standing right here and will throw you into a bus."
"Ouch. Real Y/N is a bitch."
"Looks like we have a lot in common," you reply with a humble smile.
Tsukki hums. "That and now we're both gonna die single."
So much for distraction. You both wait by a crosswalk to go across the street. You don't respond, and he continues.
"At least we'll be single together?"
You look at him, your best friend, and it hurts. He doesn't know, and how could you tell him, especially right now? So you swallow the burning feeling in your chest and snap back with your usual sass.
"I'm not dying single," you assert as the light turns red, and you both walk across the street.
"All the years I've known you, and you've dated one guy. And he was gay."
You sulk at the reminder. He was so cute too. "And I support him in all his future endeavors. Still, that doesn't mean I'm willing to die a virgin."
Tsukishima laughs in the most cruel way. "Imagine dying a virgin? Haha, that's gonna suck."
You push him, maybe a little too hard, and he almost goes flying into a car. Oops. "Fuck off."
"It's okay, Y/N," he says, patting your back. "One day."
"Fuck all the way off."
He wasn't entirely wrong, though. It had been too many years, and maybe you would die single. If he wasn’t such a government-approved idiot, perhaps things would be different. But here you were.
You both walk a little more before ending up at Japan's most famous geology museum. Tsukki’s eyes twinkle with excitement, and you can’t help but smile, knowing him well.
“I dislike you a little less right now,” Tsukki says.
You chuckle. "I love you too, Kei."
The entire morning and afternoon are spent exploring the museum. You enthusiastically run from one exhibit to another, discovering towering fossils, mesmerizing mineral specimens encased in glass, and interactive displays. Tsukki makes sure to touch each rock formation. His interest is child-like but so genuine. You even manage to catch the attention of one of the workers, who kindly offers you both a specialized tour. Tsukki asks a plethora of questions, using terms you couldn’t be paid enough to understand.
"Nerd," you murmur after he asks a particularly difficult question.
“You failed geology,” he reminds with a smirk, causing the worker to stifle his laughter.
“Your dumbass failed anatomy," you shoot back, making the worker double over in laughter.
“It's only because YOUR dumbass was impossible to cheat from."
The worker at the museum seemed to have a blast with you, and he ended up letting you two keep a small dinosaur toy meant for the kids. You couldn’t resist teasing Tsukki, saying that the little figurine has to be his long-lost cousin. He pretended not to care, but you knew he secretly loved it. You bet he’d sneakily put it on his shelf later, trying to act all cool about it.
The ride back is quiet. You must’ve dozed off without realizing it. Your head was resting comfortably on Tsukki’s shoulder until he gently wakes you up, once you reached his apartment. He insists on you staying over, not wanting you out late like this.
Now, you're wrapped in the softest blanket you've ever felt in your life, watching Jurassic Park. You’ve both been incredibly quiet since you got back. Tsukki had said maybe three words in total.
You worry for a moment. That maybe, even after all that, he's not okay.
“I’m sorry if I’m being boring right now. I’m just lost in my thoughts,” His voice almost startles you. It’s not how it usually is, heavy and strong. He seems tired. You both sit on opposite ends of the couch, a bowl of popcorn between you.
"You’re always like this,” you reply with a casual shrug.
Tsukki rolls his eyes, but then you lean closer, lightly bumping his shoulder. “I don’t mind being bored with you.”
A rare smile sneaks onto Tsukki’s face, and that’s enough to make your heart skip a beat.
“You’re so irritating.” He says.
“But you love me,” you counter.
He sighs but then unexpectedly reaches out to pull you closer. Your eyes widen as he moves you towards him. Fuck.
“I don’t love you,” he claims, his voice oddly cool. However, to your surprise, he leans down and rests his head on your shoulder, and in that moment, you melt.
Damn it.
“Okay,” you respond softly. What else is there to say?
He pauses, as if carefully choosing his words. “Thank you for today. Seriously. I know I can be an ass, but this meant a lot.”
Why does he have to say things like this?
“Don’t mention it,” you say with a smile, trying to hide the butterflies swirling inside your stomach. Tsukki shakes his head and shifts his focus back to the movie.
While you managed to solve one issue, your own only grew more and more. Kei Tsukishima. He would be the death of you.
How To: Lose Feelings For an Idiot?
You don’t. They only grow.
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a/n: when i said slow burn i rly did mean slow burn lol. i like this opening to the fic! the others boys will show soon i promise hehe, mostly yamaguchi honestly.
taglist !!! @kei-tsuki21 @marga-j @xxizuchanxx @horr0rvacu1 @lavenderhotcoco @sami-stable @awkwardaardvarkforever @rorygilmoreclown
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eggyrocks · 2 days
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congrats on 500 followers 🫶🏻 can I get #40 and Kageyama? they’re meant for one another
ur so right for this one it's so aggressively kageyama
500 followers special: #40: "Have I entered an alternate universe or did you really just crack a smile for me?"
kageyama x gn reader, university au, tutoring, jock x nerd dynamic kinda if u squint, fluff, not proofread
written content masterlist
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Tutoring is a job. It's a job that pays money. Albeit, pretty shit money, but money nonetheless. So they are going to smile and correct the essays and offer advice and they are not going sit there and pout over how much their student absolutely fucking hates them.
There's not a doubt in their mind that Kageyama would not be here if he didn't have to be. He does not care about his grades. He does not care about the material he writes about or even what he's writing (that much is clear from his essays; they have no point of view and are random regurgitations from text books sloppily thrown together to meet the word count).
It's very obvious to them that Kageyama is there to meet the minimum grade point average required in order for him to stay on the university's volleyball team.
So every Wednesday he ends up in the library with them, watching as they completely massacre his first drafts.
Their red pen draws a lazy circle around his third paragraph. "See, this portion here is in complete contradiction to the point you made earlier."
Kageyama, as he usually does, offers a slight grunt in response, his eyes narrowed at the essay before him, as if it's some sort of challenge for him to conquer.
He's not the best with words. On the page or out loud.
"And in this paragraph here, you're just summarizing again," they explain, red pen making a mess of the paper. "There's no sense of organization, and the way you start to deviate from the argument you laid out in the opening paragraph is gonna make your professor think you don't understand the text."
"I don't understand the text," Kageyama says, matter-of-factly, but there is a twist in his mouth and a slight dusting of pink in his cheeks.
They stop, and blink up at him. Their pen drops, and they lean back in their chair. "Okay, well when you're reading, what are you thinking about?"
Kageyama takes a moment to think. It's one of the things about him they appreciate-he thinks about every question posed to him. He doesn't ever say anything just for the sake of it, or because he thinks it's what he should say.
They appreciate that, among other things. Like the veins in his forearms and the size of his hands and the shade of blue in his eyes when he focuses.
Those things, they really, really appreciate.
"Usually, I'm not thinking about what I'm reading," Kageyama eventually replies, snapping them out of it. "I'm usually thinking about practice."
He's such a jock, they think to themselves, and try not to think of what exactly that makes them.
"Well, that's the main problem then, you're trying to dissect something you're not actively engaging in," they tell him, pushing the paper back towards him. Their hour's almost up. "I'd go back and try to reread more actively."
Kageyama frowns, and if he wasn't constantly frowning and sighing and grunting around him, they would think it's cute. "Okay, I'll try."
They give him a nod. "Text me if you need help going over the text next time instead of reviewing a new draft. Not due for another two weeks, right?" Kageyama gives them a nod in confirmation. "Right, so we'll have time. And try not to stress, okay? Your essays are getting better than when we started these sessions."
He freezes in place. If his cheeks were pink before, they're bright red now. "They are?"
A small smile forms on their face. "Yeah. I can tell you're getting more confident with your writing."
Kageyama's eyes are wide for a second, and then they find his hands, which are knotted together on the table in front of him. "Yeah, well, you're a really good tutor. You make it easier to understand everything."
Now, they can't contain the grin that spreads. The praise is one thing, but the way he's blushing and flustered in front of them is an entire other thing. "Really? This whole time I thought you hated me."
"I don't hate you," Kageyama counters quickly and quietly. "You're just a lot smarter than me. It's intimidating."
They pause. "I don't think I'm smarter than you," they muse, leaning back in their chair, and Kageyama's eyes flash up to them. "There are tons of different ways to be intelligent. Just because I can write essays doesn't mean I'm a genius. And isn't that what I've heard about you? You're some sort of genius volleyball player?"
Kageyama still won't look up at them, but the corner of his lips tug up into a slight, barely-there smile. "Yeah, I guess so."
They don't focus on his words, though. They lean forward over the table and try to get a better look. "Holy shit," they almost gape. "Have I entered an alternate universe, or did you really just crack a smile for me?"
It doesn't drop. They half-expected it to. But instead, his smile remains, and Kageyama looks up at them, still blushing and hands still pressed together. "I am capable of it, you know."
It's cute, his smile. Unsure and nervous, like the way he can be, sometimes. "I'd like to see it more," they admit to him.
"You could come see, sometime. Me play. Volleyball, I mean. See if I'm a genius after all," he offers, only stumbling over his words a bit. "That'd make me smile."
Now it's their face that heats up. "Yeah, I'd like that."
Kageyama nods, and then stands to gather his things, swiping his marked up essay off the table between them. "I'll text you," he says, still grinning as he turns on his heel, leaving them to try and cool off their cheeks before the next student arrives.
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an: hmmmm. maybe this one was better in my head. but im not dwelling on it.
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