#LEMME TALK ABOUT STEDE AND HOW HE WALKS THROUGH THE WORLD TRYING TO EARN PEOPLE'S APPROVAL TOO

[candied-cae]

Ed AND Stede both mask and I wanna talk about it

I know the fandom talks A LOT about Ed being a chameleon, flipping his entire personality on a dime to fit into the current situation and company, to the point that he can't even really recognize when it's happened and how far he's gone.

But I wanna look at it with Stede too. He literally asks his crew in the very first episode to give him constructive criticism so he can change what he is doing to better serve them, but he cannot fathom behaving different on a personality level.

They both mask so heavily, but in different ways. Edward masks with his personality, whereas Stede masks with his actions. And it is absolutely because of where they came from before they meet each other.

-Edward's Mask and His Struggles-

Edward learned to survive as a lower-class, mixed-raced, son of a physically abusive father and indentured mother. When he became a pirate, his survival on the water hinged on performing in a way that pirates approve. It isn't the mainland where you're protected by certain laws, if pirates don't like you, they can just kill you. It's important to be liked on the water. So, being hard, being cruel, being Blackbeard, when the company was right, it allowed him safe passage to climb the ladder and build his legend. He succeeded with that carefully crafted persona entirely devoted to this job.

In contrast, he is allowed mistakes. He may mess up a bit, but we all like Blackbeard. If a raid goes bad, if he gets too drunk, if he acts a bit erratic, if he loses sight of it all, if he faces critique? He's fine. His crew are loyal to the persona he displays and they allow him room to be imperfect because of it.

He is allowed to make mistakes as long as he is good company.

He can put on the right face and say the right things until he goes into crisis because he doesn't know what to do with himself. Because everything is boring to him that he can't force himself to keep doing it any longer. He's so tired.

-Stede's Mask and His Struggles-

Stede learned to survive as a upper-class, white, son of an emotionally abusive father and, as fas as we can tell, complete lack of mother-figure. His entire life has hinged on doing the right things. It's the aristocratic society, he has responsibilities he simply does not have any choice in abandoning. And, as long as he does as he's supposed to, he cannot be harmed. So, he'll be bullied, he'll get married, he'll inherit his family's fortune, he'll father children, he does all the things he has to do to just hold his position in high society and survive in that sort of world. And he does it well enough.

In contrast, he cannot figure out his personality. He cannot master what is it he's suppose to be to make people like him. It's no matter though, he does his job so there's nothing anyone else can do about it. If he's annoying, if he's too soft, if he's dandy, if he's an outcast, if he's not like the other boys? He's fine. He's safe under the veil of a rich man in mainland high society.

He is allowed to be disliked as long as he does what he's supposed to.

He can follow the rules and do all the right things until he can't be Mr. Bonnet because day in and day out he's alienated in his own home. Because he's been trying to find a way to make himself fit with his family and he can't keep trying any more. He's so tired.

-What Their Masks do to Each Other-

So - while Ed comfortably slips between "Blackbeard", "The Mad Devil", "Ed", "Jeff the Accountant", "Captain", "Beardie*", "Edward Teach", "Eddie", "The Kraken" - Stede cannot understand how one files down parts of themselves to fit in different places, to constantly act like someone they're not. He has always been completely himself, even when it doesn't work.

And - while Stede is able to navigate being a family man, starting a pirate crew, inventing people positive management, accepting critique and adjusting to it, smiling in the face of his abusers, learning to stun and kill, understanding and using passive aggression, throwing a fuckery, learning to duel, starting a treasure hunt for Ed, promising to do things he's not sure he can handle - Ed doesn't get how someone just makes themselves do all these different things, half of them things they didn't want to do at all. He has always done as he's wanted, even when it gets risky.

Which is why is it so fascinating that these two forms of masking, the gap between their communication, is what leads them to hurt each other in the last episodes.

Ed tries to be what he thinks Stede wants him to be, throwing away the Blackbeard title and trying to settle down into complete softness... and Stede tries to do what he thinks Ed wants him to do, promises to follow his plan and run away to China despite his anxiety about his family... But these things aren't authentic to themselves.

Edward Teach is a little bit of every persona he wears and a little bit done with the pieces he has grown from. They are all a part of him. And Stede would love them all if Ed shared it. If he trusted him enough to let down the curtain and shake off the performance.

Stede wants to do so many things that he's never spoken of and doesn't want to do so many things he thinks he has to. He just wants to get to chose. And Ed would support him in whatever he wanted if Stede would just tell him how he feels. If he would just be honest and stop forcing himself to do things for other people.

They have both been trying to please each other with the tools they've mastered to please the worlds they came from, but they were effectively lying to each other in a hundred tiny ways. Because they loved each other so much, but they didn't believe they were good enough as they really were.

They thought they needed the masks to keep their lover's affections - But they need to put them down so they can truly see one another.

More OFMD

#Another post analyzing the effects of Ed and Stede's very different traumas and how it shaped them in opposite ways? #it's more likely than you think #They are BOTH autistic and they BOTH heavily mask through out the entire season #They follow different systems and have learned different rules to survive the worlds they were born in #But I only see people wanting to talk about Ed's masking WHEN STEDE DOES IT TOO AND IT'S EQUALLY AS INTERESTING #LEMME TALK ABOUT STEDE AND HOW HE WALKS THROUGH THE WORLD TRYING TO EARN PEOPLE'S APPROVAL TOO #So yeah - I just really wanted a chance to explore all the 'actions' Stede has done over the season #and how - in a lot of them - he is clearly uncomfortable but doesn't allow himself to say no or fight against it #And it's so clear that he just does things that are expected of him - even if he struggles in being the 'person' he's supposed to be #A lot of Stede's life just happens to him - he never had much of a choice in so many parts of it and that doesn't change at sea #And in the exact opposite position #Edward just throws himself into becoming every different person he thinks people want him to be - whether he likes it or not #He doesn't know how to be himself and risk letting people down when they see who that is #so he plays the roles - even does them quite well - even if he struggles with what he things he's 'supposed' to be doing #And he doesn't just 'get fixed' the second he meets Stede - he needs time to understand he's safe #I'm typing a lot of stuff tonight guys #didn't sleep - must keep analyzing OFMD #I'm in THE ZONE #Our Flag Means Death #Our Flag Means Death Spoilers #ofmd #ofmd spoilers #hbo #Stede Bonnet #Edward Teach #Gentleman Pirate #Blackbeard #blackbeard x stede #gentlebeard #blackbonnet