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#LIKE IGNORE THE FACT THAT U PUT SO MUCH PRESSURE ON ME TO BE ‘THE GOOD ONE’ AND CONSTANTLY COMPARE ME TO MY BROTHER
sunsguilt · 5 months
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SMASH OR PASS WITHOUT THE SMASH !┊ft: all nrc characters!
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warnings: none! contains: gn reader
notes: this is essentially a dateability ranking in terms of pure survival and living your best life. i love all the characters dearly, and this is just for fun!
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HEARTSLABYUL
riddle rosehearts: don’t get me started on him. hypothetically, let’s say he has a single romantical bone in his body. he would probably (definitely) want to date someone his mother would approve of, so someone who’s super studious and thinking about becoming a lawyer type of thing. even then, his mother would be the overbearing MIL stereotype, and riddle would just bend to her every whim, so it wouldn’t work. would probably divorce you if his mom said to. 
overall rating: 2/10, could be a nice cushy life if he took his penchant for memorizing rules into a lawyer profession and became a rich husband, but still the MIL…. you would end up on r/relationshipadvice within weeks, i’m afraid. 
ace trappola: he’s like a frat boy to me, honestly. I think you could be friends with him within reason, but if you actually date him… he’s the kind of guy who would pursue you and then get bored once u start dating. whoops, he had a consensual workplace relationship. he canonically ghosted his ex, guys. 
overall rating: 3/10, you would be dating a frat boy. you don’t want that for yourself, trust me, speaking from second-hand experience here. 
deuce spade: deuce is actually normal. like he’s no rich boy, but his family is respectful and his mother would adore you if he brought you home. he’s a little slow, but he’s got the spirit, y’know? 
overall rating: 6/10, very nice in-laws, very cool husband. you may end up being the primary breadwinner. 
cater diamond: with cater, it’s probably a bromance that turns into a real romance. mostly because he didn’t want to confess and ruin the whole thing you had going on together. likely a guy who needs a lot of validation from his partner. like he’ll say he hates pickles if you don’t like pickles. will not let a pickle pass his lips. will try his very hardest to convince you to do silly couple challenges.
overall rating: 8/10, he’s sooooo cute but he’s got unresolved mental instability like you wouldn’t believe. personally, i love that in a man. call me fix-it felix.
trey clover: trey is. trey. average guy whose family runs a bakery. he’s cute though!
overall rating: 5/10, he’s probably a freak in terms of intimate relations! teehee! no further comment.
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SAVANACLAW
leona kingscholar: leona is a nice guy, respectful etc. but after a while, he’s not putting the same energy into the relationship as you are. the added layer of dating a literal prince…. no matter how disregarded he is by his family, he is second in line for the throne. the pressure from that sounds crazy, i won’t lie. you might be able to ignore the pressure of him bringing you home to straight up royalty ! overall rating: 5/10, he’s so dreamy and gorjus but he wears uncle sandals. jack howl: oh he’s so bf material, like you don’t understand. him being really firm on the fact that beastmen choose a life partner? wanting to fall in love and be committed to someone until his dying day? this is Romance. he's probs a good guy to bring to the gym for support if you’re just starting to work out regularly! might accidentally push you past your limits bc he’s thinking beastmen standards and not human. overall rating: 7/10, he’s so cute and i love him, but he’s a gym bro and does daily early morning jogs and such. cannot accept it. ruggie bucchi: he’s actually another really normal guy to date! he’s shown to do anything to provide for his loved ones (bringing food home from school to provide for his friends and family). very much an acts of service guy! 
overall rating: 4/10, the chances are high that he’ll do that thing that broke dudes do when they get all touchy and hug their partner when the partner pulls out their card to pay for something. 
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OCTAVINELLE
azul ashengrotto: he would be nice to you ONLY if he had something to gain. would actually play the long game in order to sweet-talk you into signing some contract that totally screws you over forever. he is a capitalist at heart, i fear. he’s gonna get you in some get-rich-quick scheme. also, he can’t kiss and it would be weird and a lot more drool than necessary.  overall rating: 6/10, i love octopus.
jade leech: oh god. he’s like visually appealing but the longer he's talking, the worse it gets. his hobby would literally be getting your heart rate up. you’d be lucky if you don’t get high blood pressure from his desire to see your face twist in an ugly expression. he has a penchant for learning, so he’ll want to research the topic of his interest to the fullest to get the desired results.  overall rating: 3/10, the moment he’s tired of you, he’ll never speak to you again outside of a professional setting. floyd leech: he wants to have fun every day he can. which is fine, nothing wrong with that. the problem lies when he wants to rope you into it. and his idea of fun is….. questionable. he would call you up in the middle of the night and ask if you wanna go for a joyride that takes you over state lines. and you would only get like three minutes notice. he would also invite himself into your dorm and sleep in your bed. no, he’s not making the bed either, the guy canonically has to be forced into ironing his own shirt.  overall rating: 3/10, he looks like he bites unironically. would you get rabies if a humanized eel bit you?
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SCARABIA
kalim al-asim: oh he’s so sweet, but the only problem is literally the fact that he’s rich. he frequently talks about multiple attempts on his life in his youth up until the present day. if people outside of your circle found out you were with him, word would surely spread to unwanted ears, and your life would be at risk because of that immediate association.  overall rating: 6/10, a total sweetheart, but i don’t think i’d be able to eat breakfast with him without wondering if something’s in our food. jamil viper: he has too many underlying issues that include but are not limited to: an inferiority complex that exists due to his forced proximity to kalim. as much as i’d love to say i could fix him, jamil almost killed kalim. Plus, jamil is literally kalim’s servant. association with kalim = will probably die. overall rating: 5/10, he’s got issues, but he’s so cute and probably just needs that reassurance or whatever. my silly guy!
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POMEFIORE
vil schoenheit: vil is like my fav so i’d love to say that because he’s so nice and rich and pretty that he would be a perfect ten. WRONG. he’s famous. bad! what if he has crazy stans who go after you bc you’re dating him? for your own safety, you would never be able to go public with your relationship, that is if the tabloids don't get to you.  overall rating: 7/10, you’ll have to listen to him go on tangents about neige. 
rook hunt: if you’re thinking “yeah no he’s probably a safe bet, he’s rich and i could be his trophy wife/husband”, you like french people and you’re lying to yourself !!!!! ive never met a normal rich person in my life, and rook is no exception. he would know your shoe size before you even know his last name. 
overall rating: 0/10, he’s weird AND french.
epel felmier: he lives in a small town where everyone tends to know each other and their business. there’s no hiding your relationship from them. downside is, he would have a crazy inferior complex if you were taller than him. He needs to be a Man’s man, yknow??? overall rating: 6/10, he’s a good cook, an incredible one, even. if you can’t cook and you can deal with a man who desperately wants to show you how cool he is, then this is the one for you. 
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IGNIHYDE
idia shroud: he wouldn’t date, like he’s a NEET guys, i don’t see it at all. He would marry someone if it was for tax reasons, or just to tell people he isn’t bitchless. you'd just go to a courthouse real quick and pop by an ihop after.  
overall rating: 6/10, he would be an incredible overwatch carry. would bully you for sucking super hard in any type of pvp game. 
ortho shroud: he’s like a child, so he is not included! 
overall rating: 0/10, in terms of dateability, he’s silly tho
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DIASOMNIA
malleus draconia: you would be perfectly safe with him. yeah, he’s not fully clear on the norms of human society, but he treats you well! problem is, he'd be a little too obssessed and its going to very quickly turn into "he's going to keep u in this tower bc hes scared abt u dying"
overall rating: 7/10, wouldn’t you love a loser man who is obsessed with gargoyles?!  silver: objectively, the world’s most perfect man. he’s super cute and can cook! everything you would want in a man. he's also got his wacky little sitcom type family like step brothers who are Not human and a dad who is Not human but like they care for him he cares for them! 
overall rating: 9/10, no real drama and they'd probably be elated if he brought someone home.  sebek zigvolt: he would choose malleus over you every time, i’m so sorry. like “sorry babe malleus needs help shining his sword or whatever, you can start the movie without me.” realistically the only time sebek could be in a relationship is if he finds someone whos as obsessed with malleus as he is so they can be hyperfixated on him together or something. like how kpop stans marry each other, but with malleus the dragon prince. 
overall rating: 2/10, he would use you has a human dishrag to clean shoes for malleus.  lilia vanrouge: everyone loves a fictional old man, but this particular old man comes with trauma and emotional baggage spanning centuries. You can only fix-it felix your way out of so many things. he’s cute, though. 
overall rating: 4/10, canonically picks his nose, i fear.
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— ☆
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ereawrites · 5 months
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Hey gurl✨ I’m in my wife era rn so maybe some Shisui and/or Tobirama husband/jealous husband hcs?🫣 I loooovee your writing and tbh your thoughts are my thoughts so no pressure😩 If you not feeling it feel free to ignore me babe🧚🏻‍♀️
YOU HAVE FED ME SO GOOD MISS GIRL! under the cut for length
shisui
this isn't too relevant but I have to include it. it's too cute. I definitely see shisui getting married pretty young, like early 20s. if he finds his person he's going for it. probably gets a lot of shit for it from his family, but he doesn't care
loooong honeymoon period. in part because they're still a young couple but also... shisui is just a really devoted husband. he loves the married life. insists on kissing her goodbye every morning, eating together every night, stuff like that
LOVES DECORATING THEIR HOUSE are u kidding me. let's say they get a kinda shitty place right after they get married, and put a tonne of work into doing it up. he gets so into painting, building the furniture, even starts up a little herb garden in their kitchen
finds so many ways to drop his wife into conversation lol. he's down bad even after the honeymoon period ends, so he wants to show her off. his FAV is when she swings by his workplace to bring him his 'forgotten' lunch. he turns around to the rest of the guys like. yeah. that's my WIFE. isn't she hot.
very much a believer in keeping the romance alive. he wants to keep making the effort with her until the day he dies. veryyyy good at remembering anniversaries, scheduling regular date nights, etc. always makes sure she has fresh flowers in the house
obviously it isn't all perfect though. especially while they're young (and presumably both still active, high-ranking shinobi) their schedules keep them apart a lot. and this hits shisui really hard tbh. he hates coming back to an empty home after a long mission, knowing he might not even see his wife before he has to leave again
work is probably where most of their arguments stem from, actually. I don't see it being a regular thing, but it's easy for resentment to build in those kinds of situations. shisui is very torn between his love for his village, and his love for his wife, and the fact he can't prioritise both. thankfully shisui is a good communicator so they make things work.
in terms of jealousy... I don't see it being a common thing. maybe before they get married he tends towards it a bit more, but once she's his wife, why would he worry? she's his entire world and he knows she loves him just as much
the only way I rly see him getting jealous at all is if they're going through a bit of a rough patch for the reasons mentioned above. maybe they haven't seen each other in weeks, and they both get back from a mission on the same day. and there's some kind of event/function that evening that they have to attend
so they barely have a chance to acknowledge each other, before they're pulled apart again by the crowd. so if shisui sees some random guy getting a little too close and flirty with her, he gets more annoyed than he'd like to admit
even then though.. he's not necessarily jealous as much as he is upset. like goddamn just let this poor man have his beloved wife to himself for a night. in this situation he's more likely to behave more rashly than usual, and he might just make some excuses and take her home lol. he gets a little bit pouty until she gives him some attention
overall, though, he's very chill. he trusts her implicitly, and expects the same from her. they need to have a very honest, respectful relationship if he's going to wife her up
god okay and in old age they're so cute together. I bet they have a bunch of kids (probably accidentally tbh lol) so then they end up with a whole squadron of grandchildren. he's that fun grandpa who sneaks them sweets when the parents aren't looking. all the grandbabies want to sleep over at their house. and they LOVE it.
to sum up: very good husband. very relaxed, communicates well, makes her feel loved every day. why did he have to die I want to throw myself off a bridge.
tobirama
first of all. good job to this woman. wrangling tobirama into marriage is not an easy job. he's so fucking ANNOYING. it probably takes him years to confess he even has feelings for her, let alone ask for her hand in marriage
but once he gets there. it's pretty cute. he doesn't really act very differently for the most part - he'd already decided his heart belonged to her well before they married, and wholly committed. so his behaviour doesn't change much, and there isn't much of a honeymoon period. sorry. he's like marriage is just a contractual agreement why would it change anything between us
he does make a few little indulgences though. he gets this smug little look every time he introduces her as his wife. he's actually just a lot more prone to 'showing her off' in general, and more likely to show some physical affection in public. for tobirama that's maybe a peck on the cheek lol. but it's progress
he's definitely a lot.... gentler?idk. with her once they're married as well. he makes an effort to be more patient and less snippy, and shows his appreciation for her in a lot of quiet little ways. for example, he'll be sure to leave work on time no matter how busy it is if he knows she's putting a lot of effort into dinner that night. or if she spends a second too long looking at a new dress in the store, he's buying it for her
on that note. tobirama is such a provider once they're married. he does have that traditional idea of providing for his wife. he'll probably ask her if she wants to become a stay at home wife tbh. if she says yes, he still expects her to get out in the community of course. he'd love if she did volunteering work, maybe at the hospital or with kids or something. but he's also equally happy for her to keep working. power couple vibes very strong
they have a nice, quiet little house away from the village where no one bothers then and they loooove it. especially tobirama, his wife and their home are his sanctuary. everyone else gtfo
other than that, not much is really different from before their marriage. they probably actually lead quite independent lives, to the point where people don't even know they're married until tobirama drops it into conversation a few months later. they're very private and lowkey.
unfortunately for her, tobirama's paranoia also persists. he's a bit delulu sometimes lol and she knows this going in. but it does inevitably cause some issues, especially if she's headstrong (which is definitely the type of woman he ends up with)
he trusts his wife more than anything. he would never doubt her for a second. but other men? the enemy. not to be trusted. they're all dogs. it drives him absolutely batshit crazy to watch them ogling her, or god forbid trying to flirt with her. which is actually kinda common bc they're such a lowkey couple, so people assume she's single
tobirama isn't one to make a scene per se, but this definitely leads to a few awkward situations in public, and she probably ends up embarrassed a few times. and there's 10000% arguments behind closed doors. I don't see either of them being good with this lol. he acts like she's his political enemy he's ridiculous
but because he loves her so much, and he actually really wants to put work into the longevity of their marriage, he'll come around. he's a lot softer and more willing to compromise when it comes to her. but she can't point that out because he's mortified
over time, he chills out a lot more. they're one of those couples that just get stronger and better with time. they grow a lot together, and although they probably continue to disagree a lot throughout their marriage, it's always in a way that leaves their relationship stronger. and he only gets softer for her. people (hashirama) even start to point out how devoted he is and he can't even deny it. cute
overall a kind of difficult husband, because he is an exceptionally difficult man, but my god he loves her so much. he would do anything to make her happy.
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imrllytootiredforthis · 11 months
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i brought smth w me... https://vt.tiktok.com/ZS8KnMoKx/
😨🫣sub juni who's into choking,,,,and the fact that you have so much control over him drives him insane so he just might cum on spot when u lay ur hands on his throat let alone squeeze it gently 🫠
nononononononononono, because now you got me THINKING,
perfect pretty bunny juni who has a dirty little secret, hiding it from you like you won't happily indulge in it for him🙄
so you have to find it out one day when he's just so needy, you haven't touched him in days, too busy with other things like work and school and being tired the rest of the time,
he's just so pent up and desperate for anything you have to give him,
but you're still busy☹️
still sitting at your desk, ignoring his whining and attempts to gain your attention. ignoring his hands running up your thighs and over your shoulders, leaving little pecks on your neck, careful not to go too far without your permission.
but you give him no reaction, not a moan or a sigh or a warning that he'll be punished if he doesn't stop soon.
he whines.
"please. just pay attention to me. me, i'm right here. please, please, please."
you finally glance at him, look at him out of the corner of your eye, but it's enough, he'll take anything he can get at this point.
but if he doesn't act fast, he knows that your attention will quickly wane off, back to whatever boring paper you're writing.
"I'll let you fuck me!"
nothing, a blank stare in reply to his heated outburst.
"i'll get off on your thigh,"
nope, c'mon there has to be something
"i'll let you play with my nipples-i'll eat you out? dress me up-i'll put on my prettiest-" you look back down at your paper and his heart drops,
"nono, please! i'll-i'll" he grasps at straws, "i-i can ride you? put on a skirt for you?"
"look bunny, i'm really busy, maybe now's not the best ti-"
"-choke me!"
your full attention is on him. 100%, fully, body turned to face him. "what did you say?"
"ch-choke me?" he sounds unsure, before slowly gaining confidence. "I-i want you to choke me. please."
"okay bunny."
in no time at all, you're paper is forgotten and his body is shoved on top of it, your body pinning his against the desk, eyes dark and hungry for him. for him.
"want me to choke you, huh? such a dirty little thing." he shivers and nods, helplessly grabbing onto your upper arms as your hands trace around his neck, feeling around. "such a pretty neck. so perfect, just like the rest of you."
you run a finger over his adams apple, pressing a quick but burning kiss to his skin. "would be even more perfect with my handmark. right," your hand presses lightly, not yet adding pressure but enough that he feels you firmly, "here. wouldn't you bunny?"
he doesn't trust his voice. doesn't trust it not to tremble and crack if he tries to reply, so once again, he nods, swallowing.
you can feel it all under your hand, feel him swallowing, feel his heart beating so fast you're almost afraid it'll try to leap out of his chest.
"tell me if it's too much."
and then you press down, squeezing just hard enough for his thoughts to slip away, for his thoughts to become incoherent and the words on his tongue turn into a gaspy kind of moan.
his heartbeat quickens and his face turns red, a single tear slipping from his eyes.
"m-more~"
he didn't think it would feel this good, didn't think he could feel this good. all floaty and high, his hips rut down, practically riding the thigh you've placed between his legs.
it's been so long, so long since you've touched him, since he's felt like this.
that's why he feels the undeniable coil tightening inside of him, his orgasm fast-approaching. it's because he's been denied so long and now he so sensitive.
that's what the tells himself.
you press harder and a choked moan scrambles past his lips, jarbled. "so pretty like this, so pretty being choked-does it feel good?"
he'd nod but he can't. can't nod, can't talk, can't fucking think besides wondering how the hell this feels so good?
"aww, close already? but i've barely done anything." you taunt, "guess i'll just have to stop." he nearly sobs when you pull back, when, when,
you shove him harder against the desk, effectively ripping a moan from his lips with the roughness. "wanna play with you more before you cum."
this is so much longer than i though it'd be, sorry😭
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fengxun · 3 months
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it’s so sweet, knowing that you love me
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Everything feels better when Genji is with you.
( genji shimada x gender-neutral reader | ~0.8k words )
content: emotional hurt/comfort, some fluff, established relationship (can be read as either romantic or platonic, whichever you’d prefer :)) genji loves u <3
etc: divider by cafekitsune; tagging @angelshub @bitchcraftinc @enchantedforest-network @ghostqueue; cross-posted on ao3
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“I have not seen you around recently.”
You look up to find Genji leaning against the doorframe with his arms crossed over his chest. Quite some time has passed since you first met him. If you were younger, you would’ve jumped out of your skin at his unexpected arrival, but you didn’t. Instead, you didn’t bat an eye, far too jaded to be surprised by anything anymore.
“I’ve been busy,” you say.
Your words feel practised, dishonest, though they aren’t entirely false. Between the increasing Null Sector attacks and the pressure Soldier: 76 has been putting on you, time has felt like it’s been slipping out of your hands. You wish you could be as uplifting as Lena, or maybe as relaxed as Cassidy. It’s never been in your nature to relax, you suppose, having been raised in a disciplinarian family. Yet here you are, curled up in your blankets as you wallow in self-pity, looking the most pathetic you ever have in front of him. 
He doesn’t seem bothered by it, something you can’t decide whether to feel thankful or upset about. Guilt begins to seep into your system as he takes a seat on the edge of your bed. As if he can sense your spiral into pessimism—he probably can, he’s known you for long enough—he laces his fingers with yours, the metal cool against your skin.
A beat of silence passes.
“Genji?” 
He hums, waiting for you to continue.
“I’m sorry.”
You don’t like him seeing you in such a state. Genji caresses the back of your hand with his thumb, seemingly lost in thought for a moment. It’s hard to discern what he’s thinking. He’s been keeping his mask on more frequently, just out of habit, but a part of you wishes you could just see his eyes on you one more time.
“I know you didn’t mean to ignore me,” he speaks up, turning his head in your direction. “But I have missed you. That’s why I came here.”
You manage a weak smile. “I missed you too.”
“Cassidy has been asking for you as well.” There’s an amused lilt in his voice. “He said it’s sad not having his favourite sharpshooter around.”
That gets a chuckle out of you. “His favourite sharpshooter?”
“Yes. And mine too.”
Heat rises to your cheeks at how easily he says it. The fact that he’s holding your hand isn’t helping much, either. Still, it amazes you how a simple two words can make you feel the lightest you’ve ever been. You missed this. You missed him.
“Don’t say it like that,” you mumble, flustered. “I’m trying to mope, Genji.”
“I am not allowing it.” He lets go of your hand and you’re already missing his touch, your bottom lips slightly jutting into a pout at his sudden movement. It doesn’t last long, though, now that he’s shifted his position so he’s laying his head on your lap. “And I was only telling the truth.”
“Shut up.” There’s no actual malice in your words. Even without your other hand coming down to cup the side of his face, you think he knows that very well too. “You can’t just come in here and get me all soft and mushy, you know. You’re so mean.”
“I am mean?” he retorts in mock offence. “I tell you that I miss you, but I am mean.”
“Yeah. The meanest.” You giggle, bringing his hand up to your lips to press a gentle kiss on it. With a pleased sigh, you feel your worries ebb away and let yourself sink into the comfort he brings you. “I’ll probably come back tomorrow. I’m feeling better anyway—”
“You will come see me first, yes?”
You playfully nudge his head away, avoiding his gaze again because somehow it’s like second nature for him to make you feel this way. Like you’re a blushing protagonist of a romance story. In a last ditch attempt to keep your cool, you clear your throat and say in the most deadpan tone you can muster.
“Actually, I think I’ll see Winston first.”
“You would prefer him over me?” You can practically hear him sulking. “And you say that I am mean.”
You find yourself smiling at how natural it feels to fall back into this kind of rhythm with him despite all your setbacks and isolation. It makes your heart swell in joy, being cared for and understood by someone like him. 
“Hey, get up,” you urge him gently. He does so without question, though he still tilts his head at you curiously. You scoot forward, finally leaving the mass of blankets to throw yourself in his arms, pressing a kiss to where his cheek would be. “I love you, Genji.”
He lets out a content sigh. “I love you too. You don’t have to push yourself so hard.”
You fall into a comfortable silence. In the embrace of the one you love, you’re slowly lulled to a peaceful slumber until he speaks up again, this time sounding genuinely concerned.
“But you will come see me first tomorrow, right?”
Your laughter is all he needs to hear.
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wannabelife · 8 months
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ride with you – bsk
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pairing: seungkwan x afab reader
genre: smut
synopsis: when you and your boyfriend are getting ready for the beach trip you two booked for your vacation.
warnings: car sex, fingering, teasing, unprotected sex, oral(f)
a/n: BABY HOLD ON BABY HOLD ON 😁😁😁 I WANNA- RIDE WITH YOUUU FALLIIIN' INTO YOURS EYES
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"yn, im driving" seungkwan sounds mad but sad enough for him, that just excites you more.
"no one told you to provoke me"
earlier today, you two were finishing things before leaving to your vacation trip. you booked an airbnb close to one of busan's beaches, in a more private area so you can enjoy yourselves without too much caring; and you were, fairly enough, very excited.
the thing is, seungkwan keeps chatting on his phone and singing the songs on his playlist more than finishing his bag. you were getting stressed that a bit more, and it'd be starting to get dark outside and the road more dangerous to ride, but he wouldn't listen to you.
you were basically rambling a speech to him, reasoning all of that but all he did was coming closer to you instead, hugging your waist from behind and burying his face on your neck
"relax, babe, it's our vacation"
"how can i when you dont pay attention to me?" you sound softer than before, he slowly making his way into you.
he delivers a trail of kisses on your neck, sucking the place where it connects with your shoulders. you gasp a little bit surprise at where his lazy motions led, before he bites your skin softly.
"seungkwan..." you warn him.
"what? i thought you wanted my attention" he moves his hands down your shorts to play with the hem of your panties.
"you know that was not what i meant"
"i know" he traces his fingers at your clothed cunt and you relax in his arms, resting your head on his shoulders, your eyes going shut "can i?" he askes putting a bit more pressure on your core, making you whimper, already feeling like you could be wet.
"we gonna be late tho" you replied, not so composed anymore.
"you right" he says, unattaching his hand off of you "im going to finish packing" and just like that he leaves you in the middle of the living room and actually goes finish to get ready.
and that's how you got on this situation. you both already on the road, seungkwan driving you to busan. it has been a bit less than one hour, and to be fair, you've been controlling yourself, but it's taking too long to arrive.
you rest on the passenger seat, getting comfortable as you tug your summer dress up to your waist, caressing your fingers beneath your panties "babe..." you sound like you could be weak and he senses that in your tone.
"what? are you not feeling go–" he looks at you briefly before looking back at the road, his eyes getting bigger when he realizes your position, your legs open "yn, what are you doing?"
"doing what you refused to do before"
you bring your fingers up to your mouth, sucking them wet before getting it under your panties, finally feeling your bare core.
"yn, im driving" he moves on his seat, trying to ignore your presence beside him.
"i can see that"
your fingers sliding up and down your cunt, getting it wetter each second. you gasp at the feeling when you finally reach your clit, drawing circles at the muscle "fuu-ck... no one told you to provoke me" you whimper, goosebumps spreading on your body as the sensation builds.
seungkwan swallows dry, he looks at you briefly again, your head resting while your eyes stay shut, your bottom lip caged on your teeth "fuck..." he's trying not to get hard right now, moving to ajust his seat position one more time.
lucky for you, the road is empty and the car barely stopping on the way, its practically impossible to anyone to see what's happening inside; knowing that, you decide to provoke a bit more. besides the fact, you really got hooked up and now you need to cum or you'll be stressed.
you pull both of your legs up, giving yourself more access to your entrance.
"why dont u help me, hm?" you look at him giving those eyes of yours.
"weren't you so anxious to get to busan? arent we waisting time if i stop to help you?" he spits, a little smirk playing in his lips.
this little shit... you think to yourself. since this is not working, you settle on doing it yourself. he will, either stop when he can't resist anymore or, in the worst case, you'll have to cum by yourself.
so you start focusing on your pleasure again. teasing your cunt a bit more, your panties getting drenched as you moan. and just like that, you push your hips up and take off your panties, throwing it on the back seat.
"yn... you're going too far"
you just ignore his words and slide your middle finger inside you, gasping at the feeling. your bare pussy fully exposed and your legs a bit numb from the position.
"holly shit" seungkwan's jaw clenchs and his voice gets more assertive "yn, im not kidding, im driving, that's dangerous"
"im not asking for your attention" rather than firm, you sound breathless. your tension getting bigger as you work your fingers inside you.
his tongue pushing to the side of his own cheek, he's mad.
"you look so hot like this, kwannie" you push another finger inside making your eyes roll back. he grunts, his dick getting hard on his pants.
you fasten your fingers as you whimper. before you realize, seungkwan is turning on the green that decores the sides of the road, he goes further before finally stopping the car in the middle of nowhere.
"get on the back, now" you do as he says, climbing from the console to the back seat while seungkwan is unplugging his seat belt to get off the car before moving to the back too.
he hugs your form, closing the door after him, laying you down on the back seat as he gets above you. your mouths connecting almost immediately, you smirk between kisses and he playfully set a light smack on the side of your ass cheek "now you cant wait, hm?" you just giggle at him and he cant help smilling too.
you're back at kissing, his hands exploring your body before he pushes one of your legs up to his waist. your hip automatically pushing up to meet his length in response, making both of you moan in each others mouths.
you slide your hands down his upper body until you get on his jeans, undoing its buttons. he breaks off the kiss to take his shirt off. you drunk in his naked form in front of you, his hard cock giving volume to his boxers, the messy hair and plumped lips, he's so fucking hot and all yours.
before you realize, he's going down on you. seungkwan takes both of your legs up to his shoulders, sliding your dress up to your belly. he looks up at you, trailing wet kisses on the skin right above where you need him the most.
"you are so beautiful" he goes down a little bit, taking a good look at your wet pussy, smacking his lips on your clit, making you whimper. he smirks, setting kisses on your inner thighs.
he waist no time in licking your folds, you mewl at the sensation, your head throwing back.
his tongue going up down and down your slick until he gets back to your clit, sucking the flesh. you moan, getting your hands to his hair, pushing him closer to your cunt. he grunts at that and your roll your hips on his mouth.
hearing you, he enters with his tongue on you, fucking you closer to your high. you push him again making his nose poke your clit, feeling your orgasm approaching "kwannie, im close"
"cum for me" his warm breath hitting your core, making you see starts, your pussy clenching.
you gasp at the feeling, the known built waiting to me release "kwannie... cumm-ing"
combining his tongue inside you and you rolling your hips in his face, your high approaches. your body going stiff before letting it go. you cum all over his mouth, he slides his tongue up to your clit to help you ride your orgams as you start to whimper when it gets too much.
he looks up at you, his face glistening with your cum "hold on a little more, hm? i haven't fuck you yet" he says before diving right back in.
he is licking your clit slower now, waiting for the pleasure to build again. you cant help a whimper at the pain that you like. and when he sucks your clit making you moan, he knows you're ready for him.
he uses his tossed shirt to clean your cum from his face before sliding down his boxers. his dick hitting his belly. he does a few testing bumps before laying above you again.
"ready?"
"yes"
he hands his base, slowly sliding it into you. you grip his shoulders, your nails digging the flesh as you throb nonstop around him.
he grunts at the feeling "baby, calm down or im not lasting long"
he keeps going into you until he bottoms out, his forehead hitting your shoulders as a low moan scapes his mouth. seungkwan gives you some time to ajust, but you're impatient. you push your hips up, lightly thrusting onto him. your fingers tugging his hair.
he grunts, getting his head back up to look at you before sliding out to slide back in "so greedy" he starts slowly, both of you breathing heavy as push him closer to you, capturing his mouth on yours.
you kiss each other messily. none of this is fast, he is taking his time with you, fucking you slowly. he picks up the pace a little, fucking you harder this time. when he finds your g spot, you gasp on his lips.
seungkwan ajust his position, hitting your spot repeatedly, you both moaning, the windows getting blurry because of the heat inside. you bite his lower lip, caging it in between your teeth before sucking the flesh as he moans.
he is going faster now and you're getting closer as he stimulates your g spot. your sounds are getting him closer to the edge, too.
"fuck... im close"
he keeps fucking you, his three fingers getting on your clit pushing you closer "that's right, give me another one"
you are throbing around his length, and thats when he pinches your clit and you're cumming around him right after. he lets a raspy moan, his eyes going shut as he lets go too, cumming with you. his cum hitting your walls deliciously, making you mewl at the sensation.
you roll your lips riding both of your highs as he's fucking you slowly. when you start to whimper with the overstimulation, he slides off of you, making you pout at the loss.
he looks at your cunt wet and decorated with both of your cums, some of it coming out, making him reach it with his hand to put it back in "lets not waste any of that" your eyes shutting at the contact.
seungkwan gets your panties that are messily resting on the side of your layed body, pushing your legs up, he lets a kiss on your right ankle before sliding the panties back on you. he goes peck your lips after you're dressed "lets go, babe, we have to get to busan"
you both get back to the front. his cum wetting your panties when you get up from the back seat. seungkwan is buttoning his jeans, shaking his hair back to place, before going to the drivers seat again. you brush your hair with your fingers, looking at yourself from the rear view mirror.
"you better not have stained my car's seat" he teases you, tugging his shirt back to his body.
"fuck you, seungkwan. start the car already, what are you waiting?" you fight back, and he smirks before doing as you say.
and this is just the beginning of your vacation.
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can u do cis alex k. x cis male reader smut where alex spanks the reader and perchance piss play like reader being forced 2 piss themselves pretty pretty plz :3
WARNINGS: piss, semi-public? you're in the woods, humiliation, brosex?
thanks for the 10 bucks!! Sorry it took me a while to spit this out, so i hope you like it! sorry I totally forgot to incorporate the spanking
"Alex, I need to piss dude."
You and Alex have been out in the woods since about 10 AM, working on his student film Marble Hornets. It's now 2:30, and you've had to pee for the last hour or so. And you’ve been complaining about it for that long, too, but Alex is getting increasingly annoyed.
“Then go behind a tree or something, we're in the woods,” Alex says, rolling his eyes as his warm breath turns into fog around his face. He holds his camera up to a dead tree, for some reason. He's responded this way for the past hour, disregarding your basic human need to pee. He couldn't care less if you end up wetting your pants. In fact, it might even serve as a 'I told you so' moment. That’s what he tells himself. Though, secretly, he has a different, less passive-aggressive motive behind wanting you to lose control.
“No! I’m telling you, that’s weird! What if a bird or a squirrel sees my dick or something.” Alex just rolls his eyes, completely choosing to ignore your genuine concerns of indecent forest exposure other than letting out an indignant sigh. You huff, kicking a tree stump only a few feet away from the tree Alex was focused on. Really, he could care less about whether you pissed your pants or not. He might even like it, it could be a good ‘I told you so’ moment. That’s what he told himself, anyway. In reality he’d like you pissing your pants for a very different, significantly less passive aggressive reason. 
As the next twenty minutes tick by, Alex is reaching his breaking point of annoyance, while you're bursting at the seams with urine. Shifting your weight back and forth, you continue 'whining', as Alex puts it, about needing to pee. Your absolute refusal to pee in the woods, while logical to you, is making Alex's filming process harder. So, it's either shut up and pee in the woods or shut up and wet your pants. Unfortunately for Alex, you're not complying with either of those options. You’re so uncomfortable; the pressure in your bladder is borderline unbearable.
“Dude, you're being really stupid right now,” Alex says, his back turned to you before he turns around, looking at the screen of his camera and periodically glancing up at you. “I mean, you seriously can’t be that against— did you just piss yourself?” Alex looks down to the very obvious. and, a decently large soaking wet spot in your pants. Your face is flushed a bright red as you look down to your pants, then moving your gaze down to stare aggressively at dead leaves. You’re completely over loaded with embarrassment, focusing on the nearest possible escape plan even though Alex had driven the both of you here. You hear Alex’s mildly sadistic cackling. What a supportive friend. “Dude! That’s really fucking embarrassing for you!” Alex nudges you a bit, taking time to catch his breath. “C’mon, look at me. That’s honestly really pathetic.” This is the part where you remember how much of a dick your friend is.
And even worse than the embarrassment is the way your body reacts to it.
You immediately cover your face with your hands, feeling the heat radiating off your bright red cheeks as Alex picks back up his howling laughter. “No, just— just shut the fuck up right now.”
“No way! You seriously got a boner over pissing yourself in front of me?”  Alex laughs harder, doubling over slightly as he does so. As Alex's cackling dies down, he collects himself and places his camera down on the tree stump. “Okay, okay we'll talk about that in a second, but don't you have a change of clothes in my car?” Alex speaks a little more genuine, but his voice stays laced with condescension. You shake your head in response to his question, cursing yourself for trying to save space in your bag.
Alex lets out a huff, pausing for a moment before clearing his throat. “Well, you probably don't wanna stay in those pants, y'know. It's gonna get cold soon and wet clothes are worse than none.” Alex tries to disguise his attempt at seeing you half naked and humiliated with half hearted concern. You saw what he was trying to do, but he was right. Any breeze that passed was absolutely freezing. So, with shaky hands(partially due to the cold, and partially due to your body radiating with embarrassment), and multiple thoughts telling you it was a bad idea to strip from the waist down in front of your friend, you unbutton your jeans and make very slow work of pulling them down. All the while, Alex is looking down at you with a strange amount of amusement on his face.
After a fair amount of time spent struggling to get your pants off over your shoes, you reluctantly look up at Alex. He takes a moment to adjust his gaze away from your crotch, only bringing more awareness to the fact you're sporting a hard-on in wet underwear. The look he gives you alone is enough to tell you to ditch those too, and so with a sigh, you do so. Now standing in the middle of the woods, half naked in front of one of your best friends, you begin to question just what led you here.
A train of thought that is, of course, quickly interrupted by Alex's horny gawking.
“You're really just on full display now, aren't you?” He takes a step closer, pushing up his glasses. He hooks an arm around your waist, pulling you way too close to him considering the situation. He's very liberal with his free hand as he continues to talk, ignoring how rigid your body gets at the sudden contact. “It's… not that big.” He takes the opportunity to grab your dick in his hand, only wrapping a few of his fingers around to further emphasize his point. The redness in your face deepens as you shudder. You'd look away if you hadn't already been aggressively avoiding looking at Alex the entire interaction.
Alex begins to move his hand, going all the way up your shaft and back down, moving devastatingly slow. He couldn't help but lean in to kiss you, and you would've pulled away, you really would've but, he was just so intense, it'd be a sin to pull away. Unless, of course, it was for Alex to talk more. “You're such a fucking loser you know that? Getting a boner all because you pissed yourself? Or was it ‘cause you pissed yourself in front of me?” Alex doesn't give you a chance to respond before he pulls you even closer and kisses you again. He speeds up his hand, sufficiently getting you to moan into the kiss, and he takes that chance to force his tongue into your mouth. Alex places a firm grip on the back of your neck, kissing you roughly as his other hand returns to the slow, steady pace he had set before. You throw your arms around Alex’s neck, getting weirdly into the situation you have yourself in. 
Alex only lasts a few minutes like that before he flips you around, pushing you against the closest tree and pulling your hips against his, forcing you to bend over. He reaches a hand around, shoving two of his fingers into your mouth. He presses down on your tongue, keeping his fingers in your mouth for a few more seconds before taking them out ever so slowly. He puts his free hand on your hip, fingertips digging harshly into the flesh. His other hand finds your entrance, wet fingers pressing into you, pulling an extended whine from your throat. You hear Alex undoing his belt as he works you open, followed by a long sigh as he removes his fingers from your hole and replaces them with the tip of his cock. Are you adequately prepped? Probably not, but at least he had the decency to try.
Alex hissed, sucking in a long breath through his teeth as he bottoms out inside of you. He barely gives you any time at all to adjust as he starts rough right off the bat. The side of your face presses against the tree with every one of his thrusts, and there's drool dripping down your chin from both your inability to close your mouth properly at the moment, and because of just how good he feels inside of you.
You aren’t sure how long Alex has been inside of you at this point, but his pace has become unbearably fast, and his thrusts are so hard they’re shaking the few remaining leaves off the dead tree he has you positioned against. Each moan you release is laced with quiver as you make an attempt to tell Alex how close you are, but he seems to catch on. He reaches a hand around to hook his fingers into your mouth, making it impossible for you to form any words at all as he growls.
“C’mon, you pissed all over yourself, right? You can cum all over yourself for me, too, right?” You do your best to nod, drooling all over Alex’s hand as you moan loud enough to surely be heard from any nearby trails. Alex’s hips start to stutter, too, a sign that he’s without a doubt close to filling you up. You still cum before him, of course. Your muscles spasm, your legs buckling and struggling hold you up. It only takes a few more thrusts for your dick to twitch, sending spurts of cum that hit both your stomach and the tree you're pressed against. 
It can’t be more than a minute before Alex’s hips stutter, filling you with his hot cum, rutting his hips into you as he does so. Once his movements completely stop your chest is heaving. He slips his fingers out of your mouth, panting as he wipes your spit onto your shirt. He leans into you, holding you up by your hips as you let your upper half relax into the tree that's been oh so graciously supporting you this whole time.
“I’m so glad you pissed yourself, dude.”
“Shut up,” you’d be more irritated if you could muster the energy for it, but all you can gather is an exasperated sigh.
“We really should do this again sometime,” Alex says, his voice still breathy as he kisses the top of your head.
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lixystraysworld · 7 months
Text
⚠️ warning ⚠️
There are mature contents
If u sensitive DO NOT READ IT.
Who am I kidding? You'll read it anyway.
The best birthday present 🎁💝
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POV:Y/N
I was just coming downstairs when I put Hannah to bed in my room when I heard the doorbell ring:
"Who could that be at this time?"
I thought and went to the door, but when I opened it I was very surprised.
" Christopher?"
"How are you doing,Y/N?"
Is Hannah here?Parents asked me to bring her home," He said.
"What? Bang Christopher Chan is back in Australia and standing on my doorstep as an ordinary brother, not a world-famous idol? I guess I'm dreaming, too."though I immediately.
"Sure come in ", I say it a little confused, "She's sleeping right now I thought she might stay for a night."
His leather jacket gleamed in the streetlights as he crossed the threshold.
The party was great? - he raised an eyebrow with a slight smirk.
"Yeah, I guess," I admitted with embarrassment, "Come on, I have a cake and a lot of other things."
Nodding, he went silently into the kitchen when I suddenly remembered the bottle of wine on the table and hurried to put it away on one of the countertops.
'God the guy I've liked since junior high now sees me hiding alcohol from him I wish the earth could swallow me up"
I put it aside when I turn around when I realize he's right there.
"I'll go and try to wake her up", I said, but he just smiled back.
"I'd have a drink with you", he said ignoring my words and glancing at me, "It's your birthday, isn't it?."
"Yes, I'm 18," I said, smelling the pleasant scent of his perfume so close to me.
"You've grown so much." he says with a slight smile " I came without a present", he looked me straight in the eye "What would you like to have?"
"I don't know", I'm embarrassed with th a little sigh.
"Nothing at all?" he asked and I bite my lip " Well... there is one thing."
His eyes are shining,I'm listening to you, baby-girl."
I get a little shiver from those words.
"Kiss me."
I said it as I looked into his eyes. I must have been crazy, but I'd been longing to know what his lips tasted like ever since I'd paid attention to guys, but it wasn't just any guy it was Bang Chan and what I dared to do scared even me, though I but didn't show it.
My heart froze for a second, waiting for his reaction.
A smile mixed with mild surprise touched his serious face. A second later, he leaned forward a little. His gaze drifted down to my lips, which were a millimeter away from his.
"If that's what you want."
he whispered and kissed me softly. My arms wrapped unhesitatingly around his neck, enjoying the moment when I felt his fingers in my hair. Amazed at how quickly he said yes, I didn't even realize when his kiss went from gentle to greedy.
His hands rested on my waist, pulling me tightly against him while his tongue searched every inch of my mouth with confident motions, and I moaned a little at his pressure, grasping his shoulders immediately. The jacket slid nicely beneath my fingers. Despite the fact that I seemed to be completely lost, I still responded with the same passion when he bit my lower lip finally pulled away. I looked at him with huge eyes, but he still kept his eyes on me.
"You're so hot, Y/N.",he said hoarsely, "When did you get so hot?"
I felt his hands slide down my thighs, squeezing them defiantly, and then he lifted me up and sat me down on the countertop. He leaned over again and kissed my neck, reaching down to the neckline of my top.
"Criss..."
I moaned as I felt his kisses, closing my eyes slightly. His fingers stroked up my body to my waist past the leather skirt, and he touched me higher, squeezing my breasts through the fabric of the thin red tank top, and I bit my lip to hold back another moan.
"What are you doing? " I exhaled with the edge of my consciousness, trying to grasp reality. Pleasant goose bumps covered my whole body in waves.
"I want you Y/n... so badly."
he breathed into my ear, scorching my skin with his breath. Shit! I couldn't believe my ears. I grasped his hand, slowing down a little.
"But ... Hannah .... is still up stairs.
I caught a glimpse of him smiling.
"We won't tell her... We won't tell anyone.
he said quietly, pulling at my earlobe, and his hands slipped under the fabric of my skirt, brazenly reaching under my underwear and stroking me there shamelessly.
The heat of his fingers was so hot it was unbearable. I fidgeted on the surface, literally whimpering.
The next moment, the lacy fabric of my panties was lying obediently in his palm, and I even cried out in surprise when he tore them off, but then he did what I didn't expect.
He knelt down and began to caress me with his tongue. My breath hitched and I closed my eyes again, trying not to lose my bearings by feeling his tongue as he brutally explored my clit. It was like all the air had been blown the hell out of my chest at that moment. It felt so good.
"Oh, God, Criss..." I shrieked. My fingers trapped in his dark, soft hair, tangling in it as he seemed to pick up the pace, killing me with his circular movements, and I slowly lowered my legs onto his shoulders, biting my lip again, this time until I was bleeding to keep my voice down, trembling, when he finally pulled away I pulled him back against those lips, but he broke the kiss almost immediately.
"What do you want?" he asked without taking his eyes off me, still holding me to his waist. In response, I shamelessly touched his shirt with my fingers, running down that iron abs to his groin, feeling his excitement.
"You." My voice was still trembling from his recent actions, but I didn't look away.
" Say "please," he said in a bossy, husky tone, touching my chin with his fingers.
" Please," I repeated begrudgingly, without a moment's hesitation.
Please what? - he repeated impatiently.
Please fuck me, Daddy," I moaned, my fingers digging into his T- shirt.
My other hand brazenly reached around his shoulders, pulling his fucking jacket off, and I tossed it aside.
"Oh, Y/N," he smiled slightly at my actions, "you're so brave," he growled passionately, and before I knew it, I was on the dining room table. His fingers skimmed the cream off the top of the cake beside me, and he ran them over my lips again, covering them just a second later, making my heart leap out and my breath hitch from lack of oxygen, but I didn't break the kiss, only deepened it.
"So sweet," he murmured against my lips as he continued to lick my neck, and I closed my eyes when he finally pulled my top off, exposing my breasts, and hugged him tighter when he suddenly slipped out of my embrace, pulling away. It was so empty for a second that I sighed frantically, keeping my eyes on him; he found the bottle of wine, took a sip from it, and returned to me a second later, pouring it onto my body without any ceremony, catching the burgundy liquid running down my chest with his lips I was literally shaking from every kiss, clinging to his shirt, trying to seem to tear it off. I pressed even closer and wrapped my legs around his hips as his fingers slid down my legs, and I could literally feel his insane arousal.
"I want him inside me so bad," I thought, and as if reading my thoughts, he freed himself from his jeans and entered me, and I screamed. I think I even scratched his shoulders when he started to move sharply, and I let out another moan.
"Oh ,God, yeah"
It was unbearably hot, like a current ran through my veins from his movements that didn't even think to slow down. He leaned forward, kissing my collarbones. I couldn't stop clinging to him as he took the bottle again and doused me, licking every inch of my waist with his tongue, outlining my belly button with his tongue, leaving hickey after hickey.
I looked completely confused, sagging under his every action and just screaming something that sounded like his name, not caring how loud my moans were.
"Criss!" I screamed again when he suddenly pulled me to the floor, abruptly turned me around and pressed my back against his abs.
"Call me Daddy, again. I like how it sounds from your mouth," he whispered, nibbling my earlobe as he entered me again.
"What?" I could no longer control my thoughts as I listened to his voice.
"Daddy" groaned as his hand rested imperiously on my throat.
"My girl," he whispered.
The pleasurable ache in my muscles made my legs shudder, and I tried to hook my fingers on his hips, but my fingers slipped. I kept thrashing against him, feeling no fatigue, only pleasure. Sweat was already glistening on my skin, and my breathing turned into ragged wheezes, and I could hear his heavy breathing at my ear:
"Do you like it?" - he whispered, touching my bottom lip with his thumb again.
"Yes, Daddy," I mumbled inaudibly, covering my eyes, feeling the rush of a frantic orgasm that seemed unable to contain the moan mixed with his name.
His hand immediately rested on my lips, drowning out my moan as I felt his strong body trembling with pleasure.
"Y/N... " he moaned, still holding me against him.
His fingers lingered on my stomach as he tried to muffle my moaning and I seemed to forget how to breathe...
When Hannah came downstairs, it was morning, she was breathing heavily from the headache, holding her head and moaning
"Did I pass out? Do you have any aspirin?" She mooed when she saw her brother.
"What are you doing here, Chan?
He smiled and took another sip of tea while I put the cake in front of him.
"I've come to pick you up. Aren't you going home?
" Chan! "she mumbled with embarrassment. "How long have you been sitting here?"
" Pretty much, but your friend and I had a nice little chat," he glanced at me, smiling at his sister.
"Y/N is my friend leave her alone!" - she said grudgingly, and I had already handed her a glass with pills and she drank it right away.
"Okay, anyway, let's go home," he stood up, already leading the girl to the door.
"Bye," he said as he let his sister go first " Happy birthday".
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cringefailcabitha · 3 months
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sorry i dont have tumblr (i only use it to stalk cabby art LOL) and idk if youll answer this but i am known as the cabby yapper by my friends so i wanted to bring this up to someone who thinks about her as deeply as me
do you ever like think about how terrifying mephones plan for a season 4 would have been to cabby specifically? out of all of the final 3 she has been hurt by the game the most (with no closure mind you unlike balloon), i think having to go through everything again would genuinely break her. even if shes less misunderstood the game still puts pressure onto her to be a facts machine, a strategist. when shes literally the kindest person ever, trying to comfort silver (despite his constant mistreatment of her), and sacrificing almost every post merge challenge for the sake of somebody else (i.e giving up her inani-mate for yinyang, sacrificing herself in episode 13 to put herself on the line with yinyang even if she was manipulating them out of obligation, AND EPISODE 15 SHE DEFINITELY WOULD HAVE WON IF SHE HAD USED HER FILES and completely foiling blueberrys plan, but she didnt because she cared about bot)
in the episode when shes reading the file, the screen actually starts shaking a little. implying she was absolutely horrified at what she was reading. and she had every single right, especially considering what shes gone through.
the other thing that’s absolutely insane to me is the fact that this information was conveyed to her via a file. aka her disability aid, something she relies on. that mustve been horrifying to see something so person to her used against her in such a way.
sorry i regurgitated a lot of this info from the shut i put on tiktok. im just genuinely crazy about cabby
ALSO UR A CABTUBE TRUTHER IM LITERALLY SO IN LOVE WITH CABTUBE i am lesbian cabbys number one truther and see her shipped with men far too much. but like i was so hoping test tube would at least apologize or something. it irritates me how they can make one sided silvercandle canon but they cant show us anymore one-sided cabtube. just make her blush or something. but tbh it made me emo when test tube (and pb bc they nodded) oraised cabby, it made me genuinely crazy.
also unshout out to everyone bullying cabby this episode genuinely why were half of them so mean please let silver Die slowly and painfully. also if lifering (i hc him and cabby as father and daughter, like u cannot convince me lifering and floory arent her dads) switched up on cabby i will personally take his soul like the grim reaper he will be seeing these hands.
sorry feel free to ignore this!
-🍭
😭 I was for real thinking about that earlier today like hasn’t she been through enough… Yes Cabby is a very competitive person but after everything that happened to her in this season and the fact that she’s Still in a vulnerable place right now I don’t think she would find it particularly enjoyable to not receive a prize and then immediately be thrust into a new season of competition— and as a team leader, no less.
Test Tube thanking her for apologising was,,, weird to me. I literally rolled my eyes. It gave me the impression that she (and Paintbrush) think Cabby *should* be apologising to everyone for making some of them uncomfortable? And I just don’t agree. As polite as it is, I think it’s way overstating her actions. Like… why is it “right” to apologise to the entire jury for her past behaviour making “some of them uncomfortable” pre episode 7 when she had never even worked with half of them when said behaviour was supposedly occurring? It’s so frustrating to me, like… how much smaller does she have to make herself for them to be satisfied? I don’t get it.
And of course, “making them uncomfortable” thing again comes back to her files. It’s basically impossible for her not to internalise the idea that keeping information is bad because she Might get things wrong (which. Is another thing. As far as we’ve seen, her writing is almost always correct, barring Bot which is an obvious outlier, and erroneously attributing Suitcase turning on her alliance in season 2 to Balloon’s manipulation.) In episode 15 too, aka the worst Test Tube episode to me, she says Cabby thinks everyone is just “what she happened to write down” as if Cabby is careless and doesn’t do her due diligence when writing her files. Which to me directly contradicts her calling Cabby’s Fan file “impeccable” and having “so many notes” back in episode 2?
And as for Test Tube’s assertion that Cabby would turn on her the moment she stopped being useful, and that she treated everyone like chess pieces on her little board, it really felt like her jumping to conclusions because of what happened with Fan. Because she has done that to no other member of the Pinkers. And there is way less manipulation on Cabby’s part in the show than Test Tube’s irritation would have it seem.
I’m not sure if the writers intentions were to make Cabby as manipulative as Silver from the beginning, but if it was and that’s why this is all going on, well. Mission status isn’t exactly a success to me— the only manipulation she does is in episode 2, when she tries to get Bot to vote out Fan (and presumably the rest of the team as well), and episode 7, where she makes a big show of approaching Silver about how it would be better for him to stack the ice cream because, knowing him to be lazy and careless, it would increase the odds of him screwing up the challenge and make it easier to vote him out.
I’m at least relieved that Test Tube seems to have been thinking about things whenever Cabby says something self-effacing or seems to be nice, because it gives me hope that she may finally realise she’s been taking it too far and maybe Cabby will get an apology, but the fact that she’s been just sitting on it for like 3 episodes by now is killing me,
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silksongeveryday · 1 year
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I just want to quickly say please don't push yourself to try to fulfill every request !! we all really appreciate what you do and the fact that you're even taking requests to begin with is really cool of u !!! and if ur ever feeling overwhelmed don't hesitate to close requests, those ppl who are pressuring you to get to their request can just deal with it :T and thank you again for providing us coping fans with art to fuel us every day, ur awesome
First off, I want to thank you for being super understanding and appreciative of what I do! The fact that so many of you here have been supporting this blog so much has been a big highlight in my life recently. :)
That being said, I’d like to explain a few things now that we’re on the topic if you don’t mind!
About requests:
There are a few reasons that I usually keep my requests open that I think I would like to explain. One of these reasons is that sometimes I can’t always come up with very good ideas on my own all the time. Taking requests from everyone here in this community can help me draw ideas I would have never thought of and for that I’m grateful. Another is that I personally feel like taking requests builds a sense of community and gives me a chance to connect with all of you. I’ll be honest, I’ve been in quite a few fandoms and some of them were quite toxic. So to see that a majority of my experience here has been very nice has been refreshing in a way.
Now this doesn’t necessarily mean that I should feel obligated to do requests all the time. It’s just that I find them more fun than my ideas most of the time so that’s why there’s more of those than stuff that I’ve come up with.
The main rule that I’ve set for myself is that if I don’t like the request, I simply delete it. If someone repeatedly pushes for their request to be done I just simply ignore it or block that person if it’s too much. This is so I can keep this a comfortable experience for both myself and everyone else who follows this blog. Thankfully this doesn’t happen very often. This actually only happens with like a couple people which is why I haven’t really said anything much about it until now. It hasn’t really bothered me to be honest.
I also do close requests from time to time just to slow the flow down. This is so it doesn’t get too overwhelming since I do have a lot of requests that come in. As of posting this, there are like, 30+ requests that I haven’t done yet? But it’s not a big deal to me personally. I have a whole day to complete a 5 minute doodle so I’m sure I can take that tiny bit of time out of the day to do something so simple. That does mean waiting for your request might take longer, but I’ve already kinda talked about that haha.
Being overwhelmed:
Speaking of being overwhelmed,
Also I should clarify that I’m not really that overwhelmed by requests as you might think. I’ve had my fair share of overwhelming moments with similar scenarios like this and this is nothing compared to those. I knew what I was potentially getting into when starting this account so I knew what to prepare for ahead of time if it ever got to this point. I guess bad past experiences really can benefit you sometimes.
Now that doesn’t mean that I’m not overwhelmed at times! There will be a few moments that running this blog feels a little bit overwhelming but those moments are very brief. And in most cases those moments are usually worrying if people will like my doodle for that day or not. Or if I forgot to post that day lol. But generally speaking it’s nothing too worrying. I consider myself fairly good at keeping a level-headed attitude about this.
I’ve also had a few people both here on tumblr and other platforms say that they think I’m gonna burn out from doing this. Whether they mean this because Silksong hasn’t had any news for so long or because they’ve had no experience with a daily account, I’d like to assure you that burnout has a very low chance of happening for me. I’m intentionally putting semi-low effort into my doodles to avoid putting too much energy to this. Otherwise I’m absolutely sure I would have burned out weeks ago. If anything, I’m fully prepared to be posting to this blog for as long as a year assuming nothing happens along the way to prevent that. (*cough* like Silksong *cough* *cough*) If everything stays as is, then I’ll be here for a while.
-
Overall I’d just like to say that I’m under no pressure at all and all of this is just in good fun.
I think I mostly said everything I wanted to, but I hope I made myself clear about all this. If I missed anything I’ll probably talk about it on my main blog, @miizori.
And anon, you are a great person for being so considerate about this! You guys are just as awesome! My biggest takeaway from doing this is that I’ve had a good experience overall and it’s been really fun to interact with the community. I’ve also been enjoying watching my gradual improvement drawing my favorite characters too. If anything, it’s refreshing.
Most all of thanks for reading this! I look forward to posting more doodles to help everyone (myself included) with coping lol
- miizo :)
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charleslebatman · 9 months
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hi bestie, i don't want to come across rude or disrespectful or ignorant. i saw your original post where you linked the 2 tweets that alexandra liked and i read the translation to english but i don't really understand it or get why it's so offensive. please do you mind explaining or can another anon explain in further detail? 🙏 i understand that they are changing the law so the retirement age goes up and people have to work longer and i know this is bad because it forces the elderly to work longer but you mentioned that it was a very violent thing to agree with and everyone is making this sound like it is a really horrible thing to agree with, pls can someone explain why? sorry i do not keep up to much with french politics so i really am uneducated with this kind of stuff. i hope this doesn't offend u or anyone else i really am just genuinely asking ❤❤❤
Hi bestie, there’s nothing wrong for asking. ❤️ On the other hand, I'm going to bore those who must have read this thirty times. Sorry, you can scroll down. 🙃
I know it's very hard to understand why it makes me so angry and why I say things about his personality just in connection with tweets. For many who haven't experienced it from the inside. Let me put this in context: she's been a student in Paris for a while. For years. So she's supposed to have experienced the full force of this story even more. This law is not just an age issue, as I said, it's approved sexism, approved that even for students who work their asses off to get good and long diplomas will have a miserable retirement. It's spit on absolutely everyone. Again, just in case, many other countries have found this law aberrant. Even they have a very late retirement age. Macron has been lynched absolutely everywhere. That's for the law itself. I think that already says a lot about the person approving it. But I can understand the fact that it's her opinion. Let's move on to the consequences of this law.
I don't think I've ever seen my country return to such a dictatorial system as after this law. I've seen things, images, pressure tactics and so on that I never thought I'd see in the land of human rights. The right to demonstrate in France is crucial, which is why you always see us grumbling. 😂 Here, all this right has been taken away from us and snatched away with such violence that we're even terrified of going to manifestants. Not because of them. Because of the police, and we're not even sure it was really the police that Macron launched. There's a lot of hidden stuff in this story too. We were treated to an extremely violent, racist brigade that literally mutilated defenseless demonstrators and, above all, journalists. It was a real beating. It's a miracle no one died...
The biggest universities, where the sons and daughters of the wealthy often go. There were even blockades for weeks, and manifestations. We were close to a second revolution or civil war. I'm not even kidding. I've seen places in my university that never protest, blocked off for weeks on end. Putting exams and diplomas at risk for students. In short, that's why I say it's not just the rich who are for this law. The rich were also against it, to tell you how aberrant this law is. 🙃 I know what kind of people like these tweets. I know what it means, liking a parody tweet thinking it was serious. The tweet that shocks me the most means that the harder you work, the younger it will make you. So yes, when you know it's parody and you're against it, it's pretty funny. But here, it's not. Liking it, I'm sorry to say, is going to shock a lot of people, but it's spitting and approving of the means used to get this law passed and the situation it's put the country in. Especially for someone who's been taking advantage of the system for years, and who'll be able to quietly go elsewhere to avoid having to deal with this law.
I'm not asking you to approve or disapprove of this law by going into detail like this. I'm telling you what these likes imply, what it says about the person. And that it's anything but innocent, naive, gullible and a slip of the tongue. Likening these tweets is to behave in the same degrading, vicious and arrogant way as the government of the day. This is my vision, even though I'm in the best position to speak because I've lived it from the inside. It's the first time I've been so distressed and in fear because of a law. So no, liking this is not an innocent, nor a mistake, nor a family inheritance. It's conscious and expresses to me this person's inner self. 💀
She knows very well that liking this isn't just approving the law. It's laughing in the face of crucial rights that people have put their lives on the line for (the right to protest, the right to a decent pension). You said it yourself, she's not stupid. She knows very well that we can't acquiesce to this law, without the consequences and how it was passed. She's only naive and uneducated when it suits you to avoid seeing how problematic she is. However, she's incredibly intelligent when it comes to extolling these qualities. It's just too easy.
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faulty-writes · 2 years
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hiii! is it okay for me to request again? (i was the bully rumi smut btw!) but may i request like....,,, miruko firing her student intern for being reckless or weak, but then after years she takes another intern with the readers friend then going to the readers friends house then seeing the reader??? hope u can do this but if you cant you can ignore this! don't put too much pressure!
[ Oh yes, hello dear anon. It's a-okay to request again, just as long as it's one request at a time. So, an old relationship rekindled? Almost reminds me of the last episode of the newest season of Closer Together, God what a twist that was. ]
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You were always a reckless student and could only imagine one hero, in particular, that would understand the way you were and accommodate you. This was, of course, Rumi Usagiyama or 'Mirko' and despite knowing she limited herself on how many hero students she would take on, you were persistent and eventually got to do your student internship with her.
Things had gone well until the day she had given you orders you disagreed with during a mission and like a teenager, you thought they were well...stupid and decided to go against them. Your decision proved to be a poor one that resulted in several civilians and yourself being admitted to the hospital. On that very day the hero you looked up to fired you from your internship.
Years had passed since then and while you decided to throw up your hero cape, one of your friends remained pursuing theirs and happened to ask you about your time as an intern. You provided them with your brief history of interning under the rabbit hero Mirko.
To say you were upset that your friend had gotten an internship with your old hero was partly true. You tried to be happy for them, you really did. But it was somewhat painful to know that Mirko could so easily replace you even when she knew how much you looked up to her, maybe even loved her.
You should have known your friend would try to pull something that would embarrass you. The fact that they asked you to wait in their house for a surprise should have been enough of a red flag but when you saw Mirko walk through the door, a mix of emotions ran through you.
You knew you wouldn't be happy seeing Mirko again and after you had initially excused yourself to go outside a few minutes after she made her presence known at your friend's house. You recalled her laugh as you walked away, "Aw, come on pretty face! Ya aren't still mad, are ya!?" you had no idea why you allowed her to have such power over you.
Hours passed while you remained outside, thinking about all those years ago and why Mirko seemed to have fired you on the spot. The more you thought about it, the angrier you got. It didn't help that you could still hear her inside your friend's house, this is when you decided to tell her you wanted her to leave. "Oh back for more!? Thought ya were planning to live outside," she mocked, only adding fuel to your already raging fire.
After shattering a mug during a heated conversation, you walked back outside noticing a large cut across the palm of your hand. "Ya were always reckless damn it! There's no changing ya, is there!?" Mirko exclaimed, seeming to have no fear in following you.
"Ya know ya weren't a bad student back then. I fired ya for your own protection, but I wouldn't expect ya to understand any of that," she stated with a growl, her ears twitching and her biceps slightly straining as she crossed her arms.
Your stubborn nature must have gotten the best of you that day as you remained silent and uncertain of what to say to her. Maybe it was best you had gotten fired. But still, you couldn't help but feel that grudge continue to grow.
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yeehawbvby · 1 year
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Can I ask for the numbers that end in 6 in the fan fiction ask game? [eyes emoji]
Whoa that's a lot!! Sure, but I'm gonna put it under a break so I don't flood everyone's dash :'D
6. What’s the last line you wrote?
LOL IF U THINK IT SOUNDS SMUTTY THAT'S BECAUSE IT IS--
"'Fuck!' My eyes roll shut. 'Are– are you done interviewing me?' I move a tightly closed fist from the countertop up to Magnus’ shoulder, gripping onto him for comfort."
16. Do you write by hand, on your phone, or on your laptop?
Mostly on my laptop, but I do on my phone a lot too! Usually just if I'm like in bed or the bathroom lmao
26. What’s your least favorite part of the writing process?
When I have ideas for future parts of a fic, but don't know how to 1) Put them into interesting-enough-to-read words and 2) Connect them to what's currently going on in the plot
36. What fic are you proudest of?
Falling Away With You! I had 0 clue I'd be capable of writing this much, much less stick to it for so long (as I've said before, ADHD go brrrrrrrr)
46. If you could only write one type of AU for the rest of your life, what would it be?
I don't do AU's really, but I like being able to make references to irl media and stuff, so I guess modern-AU's would suit me best ^^
56. Are there any fics that you would change or rewrite if given the chance?
TLC. I've never been great with writing hurt/comfort so I feel like I didn't do the best job on it :/
(I really hope the person who requested it at least enjoyed!! I'd be super bummed if they felt the same way I do about it lmao)
66. What’s a fun fact about [insert fic]?
You didn't specify, so I guess I'll just wing it :') Most of y'all are Arven simps, so I'm gonna assume that's why you're here and choose one of those:
When I wrote Love Languages I was like "ha this is so fucking corny nobody is gonna like it this came out so bad" but it's literally like my second (?) most popular one-shot now
76. How do you deal with writing pressure, whether internal or external?
I yell about it on the internet and then push it down and try to ignore it :')
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cocksuki2 · 2 years
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this isn’t anime related (I apologize) but i need a bit of advice? idk but yk how hard it is to get a job especially in this day and age right. well my dad keeps pressuring me to get one when I’m literally disabled (deaf + autistic) and I’ve also told him that i am not mentally ready to have one but he’s not listening😭. i have severe anxiety, always paranoid, horrible sleeping issues, and scared of everything & everyone. i have no experience in the work field but he wants to hook me up to work $9 an hour when that’s literally like pocket change. not even $16 an hour like my sister is making. ((now with this monkey pox going around??? yea i dont even wanna step foot outside rn))
idk what to do, do you have any advice on how i should go about it? i cant bring it up w/o an argument happening. sorry if you’re uncomfortable with answering this ask😭you can just delete it or ignore it😞
hello hello!!!!
i honestly don't think im equipped to give advice when it comes to this, especially since it seems you and i have very different ways of coping with things. i also don't deal with a disability that affects how i interact with the world, so i feel VERY underqualified to give any advice at all about this.
my best suggestion would be to come to a middle ground of sorts with him. speaking from my own personal experience with an anxiety disorder (so pls take this with the largest grain of salt possible since it is very likely that u and i interact with the world in very different ways), i found that getting a job and putting myself into the workforce was the best way to get over the hump of not feeling prepared. it kinda forced me to be like "alright, this is how the world is regardless of my own shit that i have going on" which is kind of a shitty thing but at the same time it was very rewarding for me personally.
the best place to start getting experience is to just jump right in and try and get that experience wherever you can, yk? and while you deserve to be paid at least minimum wage where you are (in my state it is 15 an hour), its good that your dad can hook you up with a job where you might feel more comfortable. i think that if you were going to try and find that middle ground, you should maybe at least articulate that if you are going to work, you deserve to work for minimum wage at the very least and that you at least want that if you're not going to have much of a choice in the matter.
that being said, the way we interact with the world is probably very different and i can see where the apprehension that you're feeling about entering the workforce might be coming from. it can be a really unforgiving and difficult place. the fact of the matter is that in this capitalistic nightmare we live in, work is a necessity for adults and your dad is probably just trying to look out for you the only way he knows how (I'm assuming).
however, if you are not ready, maybe try having a conversation with him about how you can get ready instead of just saying no, yk? bc as adults, we all gotta work at some point to support ourselves (im assuming once again abt your situation, sorry). a good way to avoid a blow-out argument would be to show that it's not that you don't want to work but rather that you feel unprepared to go in as you are now and might need a little time and extra assistance to learn what to expect for someone with your life experiences.
again, i feel woefully unqualified to give this advice, but i at least hope that it can offer some clarity and a little comfort in knowing that there are many people who don't feel ready to enter the workforce, including me when i first started working. i hope that you work out a solution that works for you and that things begin to improve.
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dms-saggicorn · 2 years
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Hello Anonies! I uh have a question for y'all. I was wondering what y'all like to see next? I got 3 asks left so as you'd imagine I'm kind of running out of ideas of what to post here lol besides ya know reblogs and stuff.
Like would you like to see more stuff about Dawn? If so I got a few written stuff about her like what her relationship with the other YB characters is like, How YB and her met and other fun facts about her (and a comic I've promised to post that is taking FOREVER because I get sidetracked, lazy, and tired often UnU not to mention other stuff too??? smh)
Ngl I kinda wanna dive deeper (pun not intended) on the accidental Mermay Au idea since the pics were received well. Specifically the relationship between Dawn and TK for some reason???? Got little sketchies of her and the YB crew too. I could share my thoughts on some characters from the game or whatever else y'all like to read or see from it :3
If Dawn and YOur B0yfriend is a dead end
maybe I could delve more into the Sunny Day Jack stuff? the "5 creepy things about Sunny Day Jack" post went surprisingly well lol and altho I haven't finished my designs for Brandy (Sunny Day Jack OC work in progress name) I do got some ideas and wip. Maybe we could come up ideas for her together? Idk I could chit chat about other characters from the game if anyone is interested? Could do little exclusive doodles for Jack and the others if anyone wants to see :3
SWWSDJ is wack?
I've been working on another OC for the John Doe game! Got a back story and overall story for them too a lot more than Brandy that's for sure lol (RIP Brandy) It was a lot of fun to developed since Doe is pretty much a wild card, at least a lot more than the others. I like before would be willing talk about others from the game if anyone is interested! Got wip pieces for him too >u>
Doe is a no no?
How bout 14 days with you? Oof Ren is...rather not yet, not unless anyone else wants to chat about him U///U been thinking shockingly about making an OC for the game too but I haven't thought up anything concrete about who'd they'd be yet but imma getting there :3
14 days with who?
How bout a playlist? I've thought of a lot of songs for the characters and relationships that i think fit them. I'd be VERY tempted to create pieces based on them too because art and music together??? Magic. Love that shit
👌😔👌
Nah playlist should be dissed?
Got a bunch of OC ideas for Hazbin Hotel. Been (very slowly) developing them and been putting them off because other junk getting my attention. I do got a few with just names and song ideas for em. Might wanna gush about the Hazbin characters too if y'all so choose??? Or when I develop more stuff :3
It's called HAZBIN hotel for a REASON?
The Desiree piece went quite well, Y'all wanna talk about Danny Phantom? Got no OCs but shit i could make one if I really wanted lol love that show clearly so wouldn't mind talking about it or making art about it some more :3
Well damn Idk we could chat about other old random stuff then. Bout me, what's going on with y'all, stuff y'all wanna share with me (god I'd love that) anything and everything goes Anonies UuU maybe keep it clean tho? but hey I can't stop ya I ain't ya guardian :p Any other fandom or show or game y'all wanna talk about go nuts I'll be game to talk bout it if I can :3
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K k that's enough Rambling feel free ignore this post if ya want, pressure at all UuU hope y'all have a nice day/night/life in general Anonies. Take care 💜
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fruitpilled · 2 years
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listen listen. i KNOW yall are probs bored of me talking about the black annabeth discourse but you NEED TO UNDERSTAND how STUPID some peoples opinions on this whole thing is. like. hold on. i'll put it under a keep reading so u don't have to read it if u don't wanna.
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^^ no one is saying that. cope harder
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"I just have a hard time seeing her as annabeth just because of how she was described in the books" get over it loser
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THIS COMMENT MAKES ME SEE RED. "I'm sure they just did this for nowadays pressure to have representation, which I totally support, just not the way they did it. Rick has already written a lot of characters from different backgrounds, they didn't have to change a character we've known for almost 20 years now (I think) just to fit a certain social requirement." THEY AREN'T CHANGING ANNABETHS RACE YOU FUCKING IDIOT THEY CAST A BLACK ACTOR FOR A WHITE CHARACTER. annabeth is still white in the books. she is just being played by a black person. they arent fucking rewriting the character to be black JESUS FUCKING CHRIST. "Can you imagine if they did the kane chronicles and carter was fair? Or Frank not Asian Canadian?" carter and franks race play heavily into their stories............. so yes changing their race would be bad because you'd be erasing parts of their identities AND parts of their stories. there is no "white identity" or "white story" because white ppl don't have to OVERCOME ANYTHING to exist as a white person. idiot.
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oh noooo... get over it. cope. seethe. no one was like this with percy's casting.
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IM IN SHAMBLES. WHAT. HUH. WHY DOES THIS HAVE TO BE EXPLAINED. im going to give them the benefit of the doubt and hope to god they're just a young white kid who doesn't get racism yet but HOLY GOD ABOVE this is so. ugh.
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.........do i even have to explain? god im tired
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"I found so much comfort in the fact that annabeth broke stereotypes as a blonde girl that was actually smart" .....how do you miss the point THAT BADLY?????????? you found comfort in the books, now black ppl will find comfort in the movies. scary i know.
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all black people are the same 🤪🤪
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BIG NEWS EVERYONE PJO WASNT WOKE THIS WHOLE TIME .
there are so many more ignoring comments (some borderlining on straight up racism) but i think my brain will start decaying if i keep reading these
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sunflowervolvimp3 · 3 years
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if anyone would like a good starbucks holiday drink hack: chai tea latte with no water and sub eggnog is so delicious and it tastes like christmas in a cup
#but pls do not reblog this because it’s ACTUALLY A VENT POST I JUST FELT WEIRD DOING THE LIL DOT AND NOTHING ELSE SO FEEL FREE TO IGNORE!!!!#anyways today has been A Day on top of A Week honestly like#i have so much fucking university shit to do like i have two essays due this week i haven’t started#i have to memorize two german pieces for my lesson on thursday#and to top it all off!! i got a phone call from my father :))#and i didn’t answer his call yesterday and i felt guilty because i hadn’t seen him in over a month because i was sick and busy#and so i answered and he asked me to come over tonight#did not even ask if i was feeling better!!! if i was still sick!! despite the fact that i got tested for covid because of my symptoms!#he just asked me to come over tonight and i said no because. essays!!#and he asked me to come over tomorrow and i said no again and i probably can’t for the next two weeks#and i thought it was because he wanted to see me but turns out :) he just fucked up something on his wife’s citizenship application :)#and needs me help figuring it out :)#and like pandemic regulations ASIDE!! WHICH STATE I CANNOT GO TO ANOTHER HOUSEHOLD!!#I HAVE FOUR ESSAYS DUE WITHIN A ONE WEEK PERIOD AND FINALS#so i said. i cannot come over for like three weeks because of school.#and then he just huffed and said ‘alright’ and then hung up a few seconds later#the entire phone call was literally 1:09 LIKE!!!!!#I AM SO!!!! DONE!!!!!!!#SO DONE!!!!!!!!!!#LIKE IGNORE THE FACT THAT U PUT SO MUCH PRESSURE ON ME TO BE ‘THE GOOD ONE’ AND CONSTANTLY COMPARE ME TO MY BROTHER#HE SAYS HES HAPPY IM GETTING A DEGREE BUT DOESNT SEEM TO UNDERSTAND THE AMOUNT OF WORK I PUT INTO IT#AND WHY I CANT DROP EVERYTHING TO SEE HIM WHEN IT WORKS FOR HIM#AND FOR THE LAST THREE YEARS!!!!!! I HAVE BEEN SO TERRIFIED OF HIM KNOWING I LIKE GIRLS!!!!!#BECAUSE HE HAS STRAIGHT UP TOLD ME HE DOESNT BELIEVE IN BEING GAY!!!!#AND THAT IF MY BROTHER WAS GAY HE WOULDNT BE HIS SON ANYMORE!!!!#AND IVE BEEN SO SCARED OF BEING DISOWNED THAT IVE SAID NOTHING#and now. that the possibility of me dating a girl is here. i have been terrified to have that conversation with him#and have thought out all the ways i can avoid it#BUT LIKE!!!! WHY THOUGH!!!! BECAUSE WHATS GONNA HAPPEN!!!!#LIKE ALL IM LOSING IS HIS FINANCIAL SUPPORT AND I CAN FUCKING GO WITHOUT THAT IF HE DECIDED TO CHOOSE HIS SHITTY VIEW OVER HIS ONLY DAUGHTER
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