#LIKE IVE GOT COMMS AND BIG SCENES AND SHIT

[the-woild-is-y-erster]

OUGH OK HI

this is kind of mostly for @chases-main-blog because you're probably the only one besides toff who'll read this but everyone's welcome xx its abt my ocs and just newsies in general btw babes so if you aint interested dont read it

ok so i got back from an airshow in my city (yes yes i know government propaganda galore, planes are cool ok) because my dad was in the air force for twenty-odd years and is a huge nerd, which he has passed on to me and my brother slightly

my point being!!

the entire tme i was thinking of. uh. basically a top gun au. of newsies. OK BUT HEAR ME OUT HEAR ME OUTTTT

(im gonna use some terms that if you didnt basically grow up on an air base like i did you might not understand but bear w me ok)so you need to trust your squadron with your life, right? what do the boroughs do? exactly. and they have callsigns in the AF (not sure abt any other branches, lmk if you have that info but i dont think they get callsigns hah boring losers >:P) WHAT DO THE NEWSIES HAVE??? STUPID NICKNAMES THAT DONT REALLY MAKE SENSE!!! DO YOU SEE WHAT I MEAN!!!!

so consider

theres no war because i say so and theye all just goofing off on base as all the different squadrons (OHGOHGOHOOHO BROOKLYN WOULD SO BE HELICOPTERS OMGGGG) and they just have a jolly old time until they get this super important super top secret mission where they all have to work together and it would be so cool

ok wait now i gotta

manhattan-F-16s, little guys that go NYOOOOM n shoot stuff

brooklyn-HH-60G pave hawks, theyre big helicopters, search n rescue (hey manhattan the calvary's comin WHO) and pararescue but they also have turrets i think and obvi everyone on board is armed so theyre like super cool

queens-A-10s cus they get to blow stuff up but theyre really slow so pick your poison, i think they'd do A-10s in the field and hang back to train on the T-38s but i know queensies would love A-10s cus they have a rotating gun on the front that shoots super fast and is just an all around cool plane ALTERATIVELY they would also be F-16s because go nyoom shoot stuff

bronx-T-38s, trainers for the big jets and only used sparingly (sorry bronx xx) i think they'd be ground control as well

harlem-C-5 galaxy, MASSIVE jet used for transportation of troops and cargo n planes n stuff and when i say massive i mean m a s s i v e like they drive wholeass tanks and jets n stuff in there, and the nose swings up aswell as the back hatch so you can just. drive straight through this giant plane, its so cool

long island-F-35 theyre pretty fast and can go pretty high so all around a good jet, not much else to say

can you tell i basically lived on base until i was like eight?

ive had a scene for if i actually wrote this stuck in my head all day abt eel n shoe and i just ughhhh ok now i have to write it but i'm gonna put a read more so if you dont want to read it you dont have to xx

a crackle and a ding came over the intercom, soft breathing following. "heya harv, it's just me n' you right now." eel rasped. harvey swallowed, bile threatening to rise in his throat.

"no no no, please-" another burst of static in his ear. "hey this is monkey to shoe, are you ok? i know-ah shit!-sorry, there's a lot goin' on, but no one was talking to ya before-?" monkey trailed off, waiting for shoe's answer. he blinked back the tears he knew were going to come, tilting his throttle up to get him higher. "i-uh, it's- it's fine, i-"

"harvey, i ain't got a lot of time, i ne-i need you to listen." eel's voice wavered, but it was still strong in harvey's ear. he nodded. "m' listenin'."

"monkey to shoe again, are-" "gimme a second, blake?" shoe snapped, maneuvering around the sky as projectiles screamed past him, missing him by mere meters. using the first name in the field was a big no-no, but it made monkey shut up, though shoe could hear him over the comms talking to the other pilots, asking if they had heard shoe as well.

his comms were messed up, he realized; he was supposed to be on a private channel with eel, and it had glitched and made it so only he could hear eel, but the entire squadron-and everyone on the ground, he thought-could hear him.

he drew in a shaky breath. "i'm here, zeke. talk to me."

eel chuckled dryly. "don't go all top gun on me, you'se the one makin it out of here."

harvey's heart seemed to stop, the air around him seeming to compress in and choke him.

"what?"

eel sighed and sniffed, the shuffling from his end telling shoe he was moving his helmet around, wiping tears. "harvey, my engine's blown and we're on enemy territory. i'm miles away from everyone else on orders from boss, it was s'posed to be a sneak attack but they got to you faster than cowboy thought-" "no, do not say what-" harvey interrupted. "harvey liam sellers, will you listen to me for once in your stupidly beautiful life?"

shoe sobbed quietly, watching his radar on his display, praying to any god who might still have love for him that it would pick up anything but the others in the squadron and the MIGs.

"we both knew deep down when we got orders i wasn't coming back from this one." eel sounded surprisingly calm for a guy who was talking about the possibility of his own death. "no, please, you can't do this to me right now, what about-" shoe sniffed, knowing he was arguing with a mind made up.

"ground control to phantom four, are you alright?" it was comforting to hear another familiar voice, the message poker carried not so much. "peachy, ground. i- everything's just kosher." harvey knew he sounded extremely far from fine, and hoped his friends on the ground wouldn't comment.

"your comms seem to be malfunctioning, i'll get saz on that asap, but are you sure-" poker seemed hesitant, like he didn't want to push buttons but was genuinely worried.

"fine, poker." shoe flipped the manual switch to cut comms with ground, before flipping it back on a moment later.

"still there?" he murmured, knowing full well there was at least twenty people besides eel who could hear him if they listened.

"never left, sweetheart." harvey almost started crying at the sound of eel's voice, and the knowledge of what he was going to say next.

"you gotta listen here, harv. you n' i both know i ain't gettin out of here alive-no, do not argue, i know you want to i know, sweetheart-you have to get home to charlie and fia, you gotta-" he swallowed, the sound audible through the headset. "you gotta tell them what happened to me, and tell them-"

the scream of a missile and the unmistakeable sound of an implosion blocked out eel's voice.

harvey's heart stopped.

"eel? eel, are you there? this is phan- phantom four to ra- raven two, are you-" the panic in his head and the pounding in his ears made it nearly impossible to see. he tried to breathe like eel taught him, but his throat seemed intent on making him stutter and practically asphyxiate.

"hoarder to shoe, what is going on? are you alright, do you need backup?" his friend sounded alarmed. for good reason, thought shoe through his panic.

"ground, i ne-i need co-ords on- on raven two, i-i've lost comms with-"

"ah, merde! harv, i'm here!" the sound of eel's voice was garbled, but it was there.

"eel? ezekiel cattaneo, where t-the hell are you? give me your coord-coordinates, i'll be right there." the relief that flooded shoe's body was instantaneous, but short lived.

"no time! they got my other engine, i've put them post on standby and i'm usin' the propellors, but they blasted those too. i think there's three MIGs, but it's hard to tell."

the sounds of the entire rest of the squadron and ground control trying to get shoe's attention faded as he absorbed the information his lover gave him.

"i know i'm goin out, so i'll say this before i die.

"harvey 'shoe' liam sellers, you are the most incredible and amazing soul i have ever had the pleasure of meeting. my life has been so much better since i had you in it, and i know charlie and fia can say the same. i need you to tell the kids i love them, and i need you to remember to take deep breaths when you get overwhelmed, okay? can you do that for me, tesoro?"

"ez, i-i-"

"i love you, you know that? you're the first man i've ever truly believed that i've loved, and the first to have loved me back." eel was clearly out of breath and choked up, but shoe could hear him as clearly as if he was standing next to him, despite the delay on the comms and the static overlaying eel's speech.

"zeke, ple- please, y-you gotta tell me whe- where you are, i can get th- there in t- time i promise, please-" harvey was sobbing. he knew he couldn't reach his lover in time before his engines failed completely, and the risk of hitting the canopy on ejection was so high there was such a slim chance of survival it was almost laughable, if shoe had felt like laughing.

"i love you, ok?" screaming missiles and static filled shoe's ears again.

he sat in shock.

"eel? c'mon, y- you c- can't do thi- this to me, baby, i-i can't..." silence and more static.

"g- ground, y-you got a- a locat- a location o -on raven two?" he muttered, his brain feeling like mush.

"negative, lieutenant."

#oops! :) #sorry not sorry #i've got the military au brainrot rn #it was all that propaganda at the airshow X(/j #i've had something like this in my head for a few days i just finally fleshed it out a little xx #lemme know if this is actually a thing i should write and you would read !! #newsies oc #ezekiel 'eel' 'zeke' #harvey 'shoe' sellers #newsies #livesies #92sies #zee's scribbles!

[budderball]

catch me making a pride icon and then forgetting to post it until the last day of june

#I HAVE SO MUCH ART I HAVENT POSTED???? HELLO???? #LIKE IVE GOT COMMS AND BIG SCENES AND SHIT #THAT I JUST #FORGOT ABOUT #I GUESS #im so mad about it ksjdvnkdsvns #so!!! sorry ive been gone so long!!!!! #please accept my KC as a peace offering #kc #fursona #furry #anthro #my art #icon #pride #im not tagging all the flags. yall just gotta guess #digital #yall i can not WAIT until i post my hollow knight art i made for my friend #yall better love it its got a background and everything #but heehoo heres fursona #hope you guys had a good pride month! #pride 2021

[atamascolily]

The cover of Junior Jedi Knights #5: Vader's Fortress by Rebecca Moesta features Anakin and Artoo dodging blaster fire while Tahiri does a bad-ass leap and Darth Vader looms in the background. So I guess this next field trip is to wherever the hell Vader's fortress is located... and given that this book was published in 1997, I'm pretty sure it isn't Mustafar.

Readers, I squealed with delight when I realized they were actually going to Bast Castle on Vjun.

[cut for length and discussion of Dark Empire]

Vjun's first appearance was in Dark Empire, but it's the main setting for Sean Stewart's Clone War-era novel Yoda: Dark Rendezvous (2004), which happens to be one of the best Legends books ever. Period. Drop everything and go read it now. Stewart's Vjun is a Dark side Gothic horror wonderland full of crumbling castles, crazed nobility, and flesh-eating moss. I love it, and you will, too.

Vjun also appears in various video games, with no less than Kyle Katarn describing it as "a big, dead, important rock". High praise, indeed.

Oh, and if you're curious, Wookiepeedia says Vjun is "pronounced as "VAH-JUHN" in Star Wars: Jedi Knight: Jedi Academy, but in Star Wars Battlefront: Elite Squadron, it is pronounced as "VUHN"".... so anything goes, really.

Anyway, so having dealt with his heritage by going to Dagobah in the last book, the logical next step is for Anakin to actually go and visit Vader's castle in person. You know, exposure therapy. Right?

Okay, let's see what the text says.

Anakin, Tahiri and Uldir are hanging out on the landing pad on Yavin IV waiting for Tionne to show up. Tahiri loves Tionne so much, she doesn't mind waiting around, and she wishes she could have gone with Tionne on this latest trip to Borgo Prime and I just... I love their relationship, okay?

Tionne has a new ship - the Lore Seeker! Anakin uses the Force to determine it's in great shape despite its odd appearance. (It has sails to harness solar wind, lol!)

“I’m glad to hear you say that,” the Jedi instructor said with a smile. “I thought so, too. But because the ship was so old, I was able to buy it from a Randoni trader for a song.”

“How much did you really pay?” Uldir asked.

Tionne shrugged.

“Just a song. Really. While I was looking for Jedi legends, I came across an ancient song that told about the very firstRan - doni merchants and the vaults where they hid their wealth. The trader was so interested that she offered me the Lore Seeker in exchange for the song. Now come help me unload my cargo, and I’ll show you some of my other treasures.”

DID I MENTION I LOVE HER???

Also, Tionne got some other stuff, too:

“You may carry this Twi’lek story-chain, Tahiri-each link tells a different part of a story. Please be very careful with it. Uldir, here is a holodisk. It holds a recording of some very old Jedi songs. Anakin, would you please carry this scroll? I’ll take the tapestry.”’

AHHHHHH, I LOVE THIS.

But Tionne found out something else important "in an old fortress on a planet called Vjun" and this is where I started SCREAMING because I know exactly where this is going and this is such a great set-up - especially since none of the kids have a clue.

Of course, they want to go, and Tionne's trying to be diplomatic about it.

“Does anyone live in the fortress?” Anakin asked.

Tionne shook her head.

“Not anymore.”

“Well, if it’s really that important, don’t you think you ought to go find it?” Tahiri said. “And don’t forget that you promised to take me with you this time.”

“I’d like to go along, too,” Anakin added.

“Yeah, it sounds like fun,” Uldir said.

Tionne frowned.

“I’m not sure Master Skywalker will approve. It could be a bit dangerous."

LOLOLOLOL, since when has that ever stopped anybody in this series?? But according to Tionne, the danger isn't Sith ghosts or anything like that - it's other people trying to snag a certain treasure first.

And what is this special object? the kids want to know.

Tionne’s face lit with a wondering smile, and she gave a happy sigh.

“It’s Obi-Wan Kenobi’s lightsaber!”

ITS A MACGUFFIN! Also, given all of Vader’s issues with Obi-wan, the fact that he kept his old master’s lightsaber in his hidden Gothic Drama Castle is... something. But I digress.

Cut to Luke, being Luke.

Luke Skywalker, dressed in a comfortable black flightsuit, sat on the stone floor in the room where he meditated and did his office work. At the moment, though, Luke was not meditating. Before him in the center of the room stood his barrel-shaped blue and white droid, ArtooDetoo. It was time for Artoo’s routine cleaning. Anakin’s older sister Jaina often helped Luke with this chore, but the Jedi Master didn’t mind doing it himself. He actually found it relaxing. With his tools neatly laid out on the floor and fresh packets of lubricant beside him, Master Skywalker opened ArtooDetoo’s front panels and got to work.

After checking the droid’s numerous electrical connections, Luke added a few gadgets and upgrades Jaina had scrounged up for Artoo: a retractable mirror attachment, a power booster for the comm unit, and a new focusing lens for the hologram projector.

I'm sure NONE of these upgrades will come in handy later on in the book. Nope. Nope. Nope. Move along, nothing to see here, just a boy and his bro-bot.

Ikrit is hanging out on top of Artoo's head during all of this, when there's a knock at the door. Luke asks him to open the door and Ikrit DOES and I don't know why I find this so adorable, but I totally do. More of this, please.

Luke looked up from the packet of slippery lubricant he held in his hand, then smiled when he saw who his visitors were.

“Come in,” he said, “all of you.”

His words seemed to open an invisible dam, because people and noises instantly flooded into his quiet room. Luke laughed as everyone tried to talk to him at once.

“Master Skywalker, I have wonderful news,” Tionne said. “You’ll never guess in a million years,” Tahiri added.

“Can I go with them?” Anakin asked.

“Yeah, me too!” Uldir said.

News of Obi-wan's lightsaber makes Luke have all kinds of Feels (and a handy flashback for those who have forgotten the movies). Luke's like, Oh, yeah, Bast Castle, I've been there before back in Dark Empire when things got weird, and Anakin FREAKS OUT. Tionne's like, huh, maybe that's why my contact said only family had a right to claim the lightsaber then.

Tionne wants Luke to come with her, but Luke is meeting with Leia for pressing NR business, so Anakin volunteers to go as the family rep. I love that Luke looks at Ikrit first, and only says okay when Ikrit nods. Of course Uldir wants to come too, and Luke is about to say no, but Tionne's like "he's just going to stow away, so you might as well and the cargo hold on my ship is too small for him plus our stuff" so Luke caves. DID I MENTION HE'S A SOFTIE?? And with Artoo and Ikrit to help, Luke feels good about it, but again, he insists on the parental permission first.

[Oh, no, I just realized that Luke might not want to go back to Vjun after all the traumatic shit that went down in Dark Empire, and that's ALSO horrifying to contemplate. Like, it's not dangerous anymore, so he's okay with sending Anakin there with supervision, but he might not be eager to re-visit it? MY HEART.]

We skip that scene, though, and jump immediately to everyone in the Lore Seeker, and Tionne teaches them about lightsabers. Nomi Sunrider is namedropped (queen!) but overall lightsabers are reified, and I don't know how I feel about that tbh, even though they are admittedly SUPER COOL LASER SWORDS BUZZ BUZZ BUZZ.

Fortunately, Ikrit's there to say "Not All Jedi," since I am not, which catches Tionne off guard, since she didn't know he was a Jedi master. Tionne is apologetic about treating Ikrit like a pet, but Uldir continues to be a jerk, especially when Ikrit starts sharing his own personal trauma. And then Ikrit declaims about Anakin and Tahiri's powers, but graciously includes Uldir once Uldir pokes him about it.

The skies of Vjun are stormy, so it's a bumpy ride down. They land outside the castle instead of on the landing pad at the top because the weather is so awful. Anakin did his homework, and explains the situation (Dark Empire recap!):

“Did Uncle Luke tell you anything about the fortress itself?” Anakin asked.

“I don’t know much about it.”

“Well, I found out as much as I could before we left. Apparently Vader built Bast Castle as one of his private strongholds; he was a powerful man. After both he and Emperor Palpatine died, some of the Emperor’s followers brought a copy of Palpatine’s body here-a clone. This second Emperor was defeated too. Since then, the fortress has been abandoned, as far as we know.”

“I still don’t get it,” Uldir said to Anakin. “Why would your grandfather choose to build in such a desolate place?”

Oh, you sweet summer child.

They spy another shuttle, and Tahiri is forced to wear shoes again so they can climb up in the rain. It's basically the Stairs of Minas Morgul from LOTR, only the rain is turning to sleet. Artoo hates stairs and Ikrit rescues him when he falls off - but he can hack the door open, so that's good. The hall has a giant, larger-than-life statue of Darth Vader toppled over on the floor, because... drama.

Then the laser fire starts, and everybody ducks for cover. Artoo uses his newly-installed reviewed mirror to deflect the laster bolts, so they can disarm the automatic security system. Tionne steps in with her lightsaber when Artoo gets shot, and she and Ikrit start tossing random objects to block them while the kids race for the control panels and it's epic. The statue explodes and Artoo manages to hack the system right before he powers down.

Uldir clapped one hand down on Anakin’s shoulder. “Not half bad for a kid,” he said.

Quiet, you condescending fuck. Yes, I know, he's like 14, but he's still obnoxious as hell here.

Anyway, they repair Artoo, except he can't climb any more stairs (I'm so confused how he did it earlier, but okay), and they debate whether to split the party. The smart answer is always "No," but they eventually do anyway, because plot. Tahiri's just happy not to wear shoes. You'll be happy to know that the bathrooms still work. This whole thing feels like an RPG dungeon crawl and I'm HERE FOR IT.

Tahiri notices the floor's texture shifts and that turns out to be a clue and I LOVE THIS. There's a secret pit trap full of spkes, and then suddenly they're attacked by monsters. But eventually, the others find them and deduce that they're holograms. Anakin IDs himself to a door and it opens into a secret chamber... and then this happens:

At the same moment, a puff of smoke erupted in the doorway, and a dark-haired man with a neat beard, tawny eyes, and a deep purple cloak stood before them. The man threw back his head and laughed, although Anakin couldn’t see what was so funny.

“The powerful Mage of Exis Station thanks you,” he said. “I would never have found the lightsaber without your help.” He snatched the weapon from Tionne’s hand. “But I’ll take it now.”

Tahiri starts pestering this guy with questions and he is startled enough to admit he's the Mighty Orloc. Tahiri realizes he's a stage magician, but even so, he manages to open a trapdoor, sending Tionne and Ikrit elsewhere. The kids rush him, but there's smoke and when it clears, Orloc has vanished.

Ikrit and Tionne are fine, and they start looking to rejoin the kids, who are searching for them and/or Orloc. Artoo and Uldir take a tunnel while Tahiri and Anakin go up stairs. Everyone keeps tossing the stale Imperial ration bars they picked up earlier to test for traps, and the RP gamer  in me approves.

“What’s this?” Tahiri asked, pointing to a raised platform that held a huge tube made of black plasteel. Wires and hoses snaked out from the cylinder in all directions. She ran a hand along its smooth side and found some sort of control panel.

“This looks like the tubes they use to bury dead people in space,” Anakin said.

It's actually Vader's bedroom! They find a little hidden hologram of a young Luke and I just... can't even...

Anakin opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came out. The little hologram of a young Luke Skywalker turned in a slow circle, so that they could see it from every angle.

...Anakin felt a lump form in his throat. “My mom keeps holograms of me and Jacen and Jaina on her desk at work, and Dad has one of me and the twins in the Millennium Falcon. I think Darth Vader was just doing the same thing.”

“So maybe he wasn’t all bad,” Tahiri said in a soft voice.

Anakin starts to feel better about coming to Bast Castle, which is good, because he has Deep-Seated Issues that need to be resolved.

Meanwhile, Uldir sees the lightsaber as a magical talisman that will help him become a Jedi. He abandons Artoo and confronts Orloc, who draws the blade on him. Orloc offers to teach Uldir his powers if he'll come with him. Orloc's looking for the Holocron in Vader's private quarters, and Uldir is tempted, but ultimately turns him down because he realizes Orloc is a fraud.

Anakin and Tahiri find Orloc and Uldir and Tahiri slides down a pole to confront him. Orloc attacks her with the lightsaber. Tionne and Ikrit show up, and Artoo uses a high-frequency blast to distract Orloc long enough for Ikrit to yank the lightsaber with the Force. Orloc disappears, and Uldir mentions the Holocron in Vader's private quarters. So Anakin and Tahiri take them back there.

Tionne's like, let's GTFO, but Uldir suggests they test it, which is a mistake, but Tionne agrees. OF COURSE Orloc comes back and snags it. They chase Orloc through the castle, and there's a lot of trap door shenanigans, but ultimately Artoo helps save the day and they get the holocron back, even though Orloc conveniently escapes.

(Maybe I've been watching too much Scooby-Doo, but I honestly expected Orloc to say "And I would have gotten away with it, too, if it weren't for you meddling kids and your talking [lagomorph]!" ...maybe in the next book?)

Ikrit suggests they use the ships in the hangar to fly down to the Lore Seeker instead of walking. Anakin suggests Ikrit keeps the ship, since he seems to enjoy piloting, and I don't know how Ikrit is piloting this thing since he's a lagomorph, but it makes him happy, and they all make it back to Yavin in two ships without incident, which means it's time for the inspirational moral!

“It feels good to be back,” he said with a sigh. Tahiri giggled. “That was certainly more of an adventure than I had bargained for.”

Tionne looked at her two students.

“Are you sorry you came with me?”

Anakin shook his head.

“The trip was worth making. I learned some interesting things about Darth Vader.”

“I learned to trust the Force and not just my eyes and ears,” Tahiri said.

“And we did find a lightsaber and a Holocron,” Anakin said.

“And a new ship for Ikrit,” Tahiri added. “So I think we’re glad we came along, but it may be a while before we go looking for adventures again.”

HAHAHAHA, right, kids. You just keep thinking that.

Ikrit names his ship the Sunrider after Nomi Sunrider, because he, too, stans a legend. Anakin and Tahiri ask if they can take the turbolift up to the Great Temple when Luke starts walking up the outside stairs, and Luke has NO IDEA WHY THEY HATE STAIRS, and... on that note, the book ends, with Luke being VERY confused. [I like that Moesta remembers the Great Temple has outside stairs, but... THE LAYOUT STILL MAKES NO SENSE!!!]

So, I don't know how to feel about this book. PROS: I love the character details with Luke, Ikrit, Tionne and Tahiri, and I like how all of the adults continue to be responsible while still allowing opportunities for the children to be competent and show initiative. It's great to see Bast Castle, and the whole thing has the feel of a classic RPG dungeon crawl. Yay for Artoo saving the day ON MULTIPLE OCCASIONS, lol.

CONS: Uldir is annoying, and I wish he'd stop being such a jerk. None of the characters have ever played RPGs and it shows in their lack of genre-savvy. And I guess we'll see Orloc again in the next book, because... it feels like there wasn't much resolution of that particular plot in this book... no resolution to who Orloc actually is, or what or why. I feel like this book is part one of a two-episode plot, and I wasn't expecting that, but okay.

It's unclear if Obi-wan's lightsaber has any further plot significance or if it's just a macguffin. Ditto the holocron. But given the next book is Kenobi's Blade, I suspect Orloc's going to try and snag both, and Uldir is going to have a Not-So-Secret Test of Character about it. (To be fair, he passed the one in this book, so he's not all bad, but he's so obnoxious, it's challenging for me to give him credit where it's due.)

This book also kinda sorta falls into the "Jedi lightsaber fetish" trope, which I hate. Don't get me wrong, I love the laser swords and they are freaking awesome, but I hate how everybody latches onto "Jedi = laser sword" business as a symbol of identity. I know, I know, Star Wars is really ambivalent about whether the Jedi are Space!Samurai or Space!Monks, and I just... lean more towards the latter than the former, I guess?? But like I said, the lightsaber is more of a macguffin here, and Ikrit at least lampshades the issue a little bit, so I feel better about it.  

Also, it just occurred to me it's unclear whether Tahiri hates shoes, sand, or stairs more, lol.

#star wars legends #junior jedi knights #book reviews #darth vader gothic drama castle

[were-cheetah-stiles]

The College Years - Sophomore Year (Chapter 30) - Stiles Stilinski

Author: @were-cheetah-stiles

Title: “The Booty Call Boy”

Characters: Stiles Stilinski, Scott McCall, Malia Tate & Reader/OFC

Warnings: Cursing, mention of sex.

Author’s Note: Malia was not getting enough love or attention in this fic, and I think she’s hilarious sooooo.

Summary: Stiles and Y/N fill in Scott on their theory about who summoned the rabisu to Beacon Hills, only for Scott to divulge a startling secret about the summoner's connection with the Pack.

Chapter Twenty-Nine - Chapter Thirty - Chapter Thirty-One

Stiles had his weight pressed firmly against both Scott and the rolling stand that held his IV drip, as they did laps in the hall around the hospital. It had been eight days since he was attacked outside of his house; ending up in the hospital with deep defensive wounds on his hands, forearms, and shin, a broken wrist, a lacerated liver, a perforated intestine, a massive loss in blood, and a swollen brain that had left him in a coma for four days. In the four days since he had been awake, Stiles and Y/N had figured out what had been attacking Beacon Hills: a demon from Ancient Mesopotamian mythology called a rabisu.

"So you think that Sam Wirths summoned the rabisu to Beacon Hills?" Scott asked, as he escorted his best friend around the hospital.

"I don't think, Scott, I know. He fits the bill. You know I have an eye for evil and this kid screams ‘evil’."

"He went to Beacon Hills High with you guys, and then he went off to Berkeley and was literally in my Mesopotamia class with me, Scott. It has to be him." You said, as you walked along with them.

"Okay well if it was Sam, then we should talk to Malia." Scott suggested.

"Why should we talk to Malia about Sam? We talked to him so little in high school that my Dad didn't even think to mention that he was the one who had died. Did she even know him? He was so quiet.. she would've walked all over him with her little coyote paws." Stiles joked.

"Yea, she knew him. You remember.. they hooked up for a couple of months during our first semester. He lived next door to Malia and Cora." Scott told the two of them.

Stiles stopped in his tracks, leaning heavily on the IV drip. "Malia dated Sam last year?!"

"How did you not know about this?" Scott asked, turning around to look at his friend, raising his hands in the air.

"Why would I know about that? It's not like Malia and I are incredibly close anymore, not since we broke up." Stiles said, glaring at Scott.

"Okay, why don't we just get Malia down here and see what she knows?" You suggested, as you took Stiles' elbow and continued leading him down the hall back to his room.

Scott and Melissa helped Stiles get back into his hospital bed. Stiles had made the hospital room his own: taping the crime scene photos, lamassu stencils, and pictures of you and him and the Pack to the wall next to his bed.

"Well, kiddo, you took three laps around the floor and your vitals are still good, I think Dr. Dunbar might release you tomorrow morning." Melissa said as she looked at Stiles' heart rate monitor.

"Thank god. I am going crazy being trapped inside here. I hate waiting around to hear that the next part of the plan has worked and no one has gotten hurt. I mean, when everyone was out painting the lamassu's last night, it was nerve-racking. My nerves were severely racked." Stiles rambled on to Melissa.

"I know how you feel, Stiles, but I've gotta tell you, just because you won't be here, doesn't mean that you'll be out there with them. You had three major surgeries just over a week ago, your arm is broken, and you were in a coma five days ago. You're gonna be confined to your house on bedrest for at least another month." Melissa broke the bad news to Stiles.

"Another month, Mom?" Scott asked from next to Stiles' bed.

"I don't know what to tell you guys, I don't make the rules, I just pass them along to the Sheriff." Melissa grinned and walked out of the room, letting Malia in as she opened the door.

"Okay what's going on? Stiles said it was life and death... and yet you're here eating Jell-O." Malia looked at Stiles, comfortably sitting in bed, wearing a t-shirt, sweatpants and hospital socks, and eating a cherry Jell-O cup.

Stiles put the gelatin treat down on the table, and pushed the button that placed the bed in a more upright position. "It is life or death, Malia. What happened between you and Sam Wirths?"

"Okay, I'm leaving." Malia turned on her heels.

"Malia! Malia wait." Scott ran over and closed the door. "What Stiles should have started with was that Sam was the guy who Sheriff Stilinski and Parrish found in his house with his heart ripped out."

"I know. I heard. Did you guys not know it was him? It’s not surprising, he was pretty weak... and annoying. I thought about killing him sometimes." Malia shrugged, took Stiles' Jell-O cup off his table, and sat down on the chair, putting her feet up on the edge of Stiles' bed. Stiles' jaw dropped and he looked around for similar outrage. "Why does any of this matter though? Parrish said that he didn't think it had anything to do with the attacks." Malia said in between mouthfuls of Jell-O.

"Well, I think it does. The rabisu need someone to summon them and we think that person was Sam." Stiles clarified.

"Makes sense, I mean, he was in that Mesopotamia class with Y/n, right?" Malia asked, nonchalantly.

"Oh my god, seriously?! Yes, yes he was, Malia. You never thought to mention that to anyone in the past few days?" Stiles raised his voice, frustration apparent in his tone.

"I thought Y/n would know. They were in the same class."

"Y/n didn't go to Beacon Hills with us, how would she have known who he was?!" Stiles yelled.

"Okay, alright... Malia, can you just tell us what happened between you and Sam?" You interjected, trying to stop the ex's from bickering.

"Or really anything about Sam, I didn't really know him in high school. Did he have a bad relationship with his parents or a sibling, or do you think he was just messing around with the stuff that he learned about in class and he got caught up in something he didn't understand?" Scott asked Malia.

"No, I mean, we didn't talk much, but when he would, he never said anything bad about his family or anything." Malia said, throwing the empty cup into the trash by the door. "And, I don't know, he had only been in the class with Y/n for a month when I dumped him."

"So you dumped him? Were there bad feelings about all of this?" You asked the blunt were-coyote.

"I don't know... Listen, I was in Comm 101 with Sam last Fall and he recognized me from Beacon Hills and he started sitting next to me. He followed me around like a puppy dog, and had a big crush on me. When I found out that his dick was big, I started having sex with him pretty regularly." Malia explained.

"Oh my god." Stiles threw his hands up in the air and rolled his eyes.

Malia looked at you and mouthed the word 'huge'. She then extended her hands from each other to demonstrate how big Sam's penis was. "Okay.. yea." You snickered. "Then what happened?"

"One night I let him be on top, and when I orgasmed, I lost it a little and my eyes turned blue, and I guess that he saw."

Scott cut her off. "Wait, wait, he saw your eyes?"

"Yea, only for a second, but then I had to explain to him what I was, well what we all were-" Malia continued.

"Jesus, Malia, you never thought to mention any of this?" Stiles asked.

"I'm telling you now." Malia replied, matter-of-factly. Stiles slumped in his bed and began biting at his thumb. "Then he became kind of obsessed with the whole supernatural thing, and he was all like 'let me be part of the pack, I could be useful to you all, I love you, blah blah blah' and as good as the sex was, that got really annoying after a few weeks, so I dumped him."

"WOW." Stiles yelled.

"Uh, yea... okay, was he pissed? I'm assuming he was pissed." You asked.

"Yea, I guess. He sent me some really pathetic hand-written letters saying he had gone to therapy and was doing poorly in his classes, but he was learning more about the supernatural and he still loved me and he just wanted to be with me and help the Pack and oh my god, he sent me like twelve of those and they were so irritating."

"That sounds unstable." Scott said, a worried look taking over his face.

"He lived next door to you, right? Did you ever run into him?" You asked.

"Yea, he'd wait for me sometimes, but that stopped when I started bringing Eric home to have sex with... The last time I saw him, he was waiting outside my apartment the day I moved out. He was all 'I'll see you this summer in Beacon Hills, maybe if something comes up this summer that the Pack is having trouble with, I could help.' And I just lost it on the little loser. I was like, 'Sam, you don't even know how many things we've come up against and defeated with ease without ever needing your help. Just get away from me, it's becoming pathetic.' and I left."

"That was harsh." Scott said.

"That was progress." Stiles corrected.

"Okay, well, Sam sounds..." You began.

"I think fucking crazy is the word you're looking for, Y/n." Stiles interrupted. You raised your eyebrows and nodded slightly. "I need to talk to my Dad and see what kind of stuff they found at Sam's house."

"Was there anything else, Malia?" Scott asked, worried of what her answer would be.

"Nah, I think that was it." Malia folded her hands behind her head and pushed Stiles' leg towards the middle of the bed with her foot.

"Ow! Okay, wow. Can she leave now?" Stiles complained to Scott. Scott nodded and walked out with Malia.

You walked over and sat on Stiles' bed. "Your dick is definitely bigger than Sam's." You told Stiles with a grin.

"Damn right."He pouted. “She ate my Jell-O...”

29 <- - > 31

@alexhmak @dontstopxx @iloveteenwolf24 @chivesoup @vampirepinary @parislight @surpeme-bean @snek-shit @mayahart02 @fuxkdean @teenage-dirtbagbaby @sorrynotsorrylovesome @dylrider @iknowisoundcrazy @l4life @ivette29 @5secsxofamnesia @lovelydob @vogue-sweetie @awkwarddly @therealmrshale @twentyone-souls @xmadwonderland @mrs-mitch-rapp93 @inkedaztec @sunshineystilinski @eccentricxem @lightbreaksthrough @ninja-stiles @maddie110201 @hattyohatt @stilinski-stydia-obrien @amethystmerm4id @completebandgeek @rhyxn @teamwolf2411 @acc3ssdenied @girlwiththerubyslippers @theneverendingracetrack @the-vampire-diaries-all-the-way @im-very-odd33 @vmach29 @sokkasbae255 @hirafth @caitsymichelle13 @dailyburritos @lolaversuslipstick @mieczzyslaw @atlas-of-the-world @anonimereader06 @bunnyboo10154 @itsamberh @hypothetical-cynicism @sp00der-m00n @molesandmischief

#the College Years TW #Stiles Stilinski #Stiles x reader #Stiles x ofc #Dylan o'brien #teen wolf #teen wolf Au #Stiles #Malia Tate #Scott McCall

[bipolyjack]

Please tell me more about why you like sheith, I'm very curious to hear the rest of it.

(alright luckily i had the beginning of this saved elsewhere when tumblr just randomly sent it early so imma just begin by pasting. also spoilers for voltron s4 obv) 

the original ask was something like “curious why u like sheith? ive thought abt it and i think i prefer klance”

rubs hands 2gether Thank U for Asking

first of all, thats chill! if klance is ur thing, fuckin go for itmy dude, have a great time with that shit. the fandom’s huge andtheres tons of content. im all for ppl shippin what they want and imnot here to tell someone to ship or not ship something. if u do trulywant to know why im a sheith tho, buckle the fuck up cause im awashin sheith feelings at every moment and i got Things 2 say

alright so the main thing with sheith is that it feels realhealthy and good. (well it did. things are weird this season bc shiromay or may not be a clone but up until his disappearance at least.)they’re rly good abt checking in with each other to see how theother one’s doing and feeling, and they lean on each other a lotfor support. they also treat each other as equals and respect each other’s choices (again, with minor exceptions in the current season). they got that good good hidden backstory together. they got that good good star crossed lovers thing goin on where the universe keeps ripping them apart, fucking them over and tossing them back together more fucked up than before and my dude i Eat That Shit UP. also that good good height difference.the show gives them lots of moments where they’re either alone in a room together havin a private moment or havin an equally private moment in front of the whole fuckin team where fuckin everybody can see them (like the first Hug tm). they’re openly physically intimate with each other (which keith is not with anyone else) and they’re not like. ashamed of that. there’s so much canon content i cry daily. 

here lemme break it down

we know they knew each other in the garrison, and not just like in passing, like acquaintances, but enough that keith was the only person there to see shiro off when the kerberos mission launched. in s1ep1 lance says of shiro “omg that guys my hero” and of keith “you’re my rival” but neither shiro nor keith know who lance even fuckin is. bc presumably they didnt hang out. everyone in the garrison knows who keith and shiro are but they - keith especially it seems like - dont keep track of the other students. also theres this whole fanon thing where shiro and matt were best friends in the garrison and hung out all the time before kerberos, but in s4 when matt greets shiro hes incredibly stiff and awkward and calls him sir and shiro just goes “pidge never gave up on u buddy” which i guess could be a clone thing but could also be him bein like “i totally did give up on u tho, whatever” (and i can totally buy that considering how pidge’s whole personal arc this whole time has been looking for matt and their dad, and while shiro has been supportive of that, he’s also been like hey dude that’s not our top priority as a team). so from that i infer that matt and shiro werent best buds in the garrison, and that he must have spent a lot more of his time with keith bc in s2ep1 keith makes it clear that shiro made a significant impact on his life and that he still thinks about things shiro said to him before kerberos. which we havent seen. bc theyre hiding the pre-kerberos backstory from us and i cry. also their flashbacks in s1ep2 (i think, i dont exactly remember which ep but i think its that one) when they all put on the headsets and we see their fondest memories, shiro’s is the day they were separated and keith’s is the day they found each other again like jesus.

then there’s keith’s first scene in the show. the first thing we see him doing is kicking the shit out of like three garrison guys to rescue shiro. we get that close up of him touching shiro’s unconscious fuckin face and his first line in the whole show is him saying shiro’s name. like shit dude how am i supposed 2 not ship that. the first time keith and lance interact, its lance butting in on that moment and keith being like “who the fuck are u” and its. uncomfortable. we also know that keith has been livin alone in the desert and obsessing over these lion carvings bc he got kicked out of the garrison for basically insubordination sometime after shiro went missing. we get that scene in the shack where keith talks abt feeling lost until shiro showed up and everyone else in the room looking all confused and uncomfortable as these two dudes who clearly already know each other well and have been separated for like a year just stare into each other’s eyes or what the fuck ever. also the scene outside the shack where keith comes and finds shiro and puts a hand on his shoulder and asks him how hes doing - theyre alone for that part. also worth mentioning is that keith has no hesitation touching shiro’s galra tech arm, whereas lance hesitates before shaking his hand. we see a bunch of times that keith is touch averse with almost everyone except shiro, in a way that indicates a degree of prior familiarity and a good understanding of boundaries that keith hasnt had the time or inclination to set up with lance, hunk, pidge, allura, coran etc. also the one time he holds lance when sendack attacks the castle and lance is unconscious, lance sort of blows it off later and basically goes “no homo” when keith brings it up so that was a bummer

i also love some of the Pauses they put into shiro and keith’s dialogue, some of them are just. so choice. like when keith proposes a crazy plan that puts him in danger and shiro just takes a sec, closes his eyes, then goes “alright i’ll back u up, do what u gotta do” like!!!! boi!!!!!! thats good shit. also in s2ep9 during the blade of marmora trial when keith is basically having this nightmare about shiro rejecting him because of his connection to the galra, (which real actual shiro can see because this whole ep was a fuckin fanfiction) and he does that same thing where hes like “shiro... *pause, close eyes for Just a sec* you’re like a brother to me” which! by the way!! i have said the same thing!! to a friend i had a crush on!!! who was straight!!!! and i was a little baby who didnt know i was into girls yet and we used to say we were like sisters bc i? didnt know i?? was gay???? we shared her bed whenever i stayed over and she really did see me as a sister and i would just lie next to her and daydream about touching her boobs,, anyway keith is so relatable there i could yell forever but continuing on,

can we, real quick, talk abt the first time keith flies the black lion? bc in s2ep1 hes not the black paladin yet. real shiro is still around. and keith legit goes up to black, puts a hand on her big ole nose and goes “ur boi is in trouble, we gotta help him” and she goes “yeah dude hop in” like?????????????? thats some fanfic shit again! black Knows! also dont even talk to me abt how many times keith and shiro yell each others names in that ep its unreal. also the trope (that i eat the fuck up every time) of one member of the otp lying trapped and injured somewhere and talking to the other member of the otp thru a helmet comm or whatever and they cant see each other but they can hear each others voices, so they have to keep talking to like reassure each other they’re both still alive and okay?!!! im such a sucker for that shit!!!! ummmmm the fact that shiro keeps reassuring keith that hes fine when theres a gaping glowing wound in his side and hes like visibly in pain, clenching his teeth, eyes closed, groaning, sweat beading on his forehead, the whole fuckin thing?? and josh knocked it outta the park with shiro’s voice in that ep making him sound like he was trying not to sound hurt and exhausted so that keith wouldn’t worry too much like Fuck me up!! smiling thru the pain when keith talks abt how much shiro changed his life and made him a better person??? boi!!!!!

then there are the times when shiro talks abt something happening to him and keith taking over as voltron’s leader, and keith gets all panicked about it like he cant stand the thought of losing shiro again (this happens a bunch of times but the ones that are coming to mind are s2ep1 and s2ep9 bc. again. those are the fanfic episodes). and then he Does lose him again and he’s so clearly grieving, lashing out at the rest of the team, super obviously feeling shiro’s loss more than the others (and lance is a real dick about it a bunch of times which really rubbed me wrong), going out to look for him over and over bc he wants to believe so bad that shiro’s out there somewhere. omg the “please no” when the black lion accepts him that shit Fucked me right up!! he wants to honor shiro’s wishes!! but some part of him knows that’s like admitting that shiro’s gone and isn’t coming back. and then!!!!!! when they find kuron and its just the red lion and the galra ship floating alone in space just like. gently drifting toward each other. keith’s little tired smile there. fuck me up. and then we find out in the next scene that keith has been the only one in shiro (kuron)’s room while he’s recovering and shiro (kuron) hasnt bothered to shave or cut his hair or get dressed yet and he lets keith see him like that and not the rest of the team. fuck. keith looks Exhausted in that scene. hes got bags under his eyes, hes kinda hunched in on himself, arms crossed, like something in him Knows this isnt his boi but he wants to believe it’s him so bad and its. god. its a lot. and Then when hes turning to leave and kuron is like “how many times will u have to save me before this is over” and keith’s face just relaxes into this legitimately genuine smile when he says “as many times as it takes” like!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! fuck me

this is where it starts gettin awkward with them bc kuron isnt shiro and he doesnt treat keith the way shiro would but he Tries, like after keith fucks up that one mission and kuron comes and finds him (again, in private) to touch his shoulder and be like “im proud of u boi” when keith clearly Did Not Do A Good Job and keith just looks bummed like “thats. thats not tru” and it Hurts me bc we know real shiro doesnt do fake praise. also kuron orders keith to put himself in danger more than once and doesnt give a shit that keith and the others get hurt because of it which also real shiro would never do - we’ve seen him react when his teammates take hits before, but especially keith, like during the bom trial. then theres s4ep1 where keith sort of drifts away from team voltron in order to do more stuff with the blade of marmora and everyone’s pissed at him but then as hes walking out kuron’s like “you know we’re here for you if you need us” and keith gets that soft smile again like “i know and i cant tell you how much that means to me” and then they do that good good hand clasp that turns into a hug which by the way is a stark contrast to when other people hug keith and they just kinda grab him and he goes all stiff and it takes him a sec or three to put his arms around them if he even does that at all - with shiro they do the hand clasp first and then walk into the hug together and keith buries his face in shiro’s fuckin shoulder and smiles and closes his eyes and i wanna die. and theyve done this twice now which makes me think they probs did it before kerberos too and that also hurts me. 

then theres s4ep6 where keith has gone the whole season feeling like he was a bad leader. it seems like voltron doesnt rly need him and his friends dont need him and shiro doesnt need him and hes been hanging with the bom who have their whole philosophy of not going back to rescue their own guys if it means putting the mission or the rest of the team in danger (which keith already was saying when allura was captured - how very galra of him) and now keith’s having to readjust to that mindset after being part of such a close knit team. so when he sees a way to take that shield down, he just fuckin goes for it. hes started to see himself as expendable. when shiro thinks hes about to die, we get all kinds of flashbacks, the first of which is him and keith alone outside the shack. there are no flashbacks with keith. he just closes his eyes. and shiro (kuron) congratulates him. like obv its before he knows what keith was about to do, but still, thats some fucked up shit. 

now this wasnt rly part of ur question, ie u didnt ask me how i felt abt klance, but i feel like i gotta say: lance just grates on me. im sorry i know lots of people who love him but he just. isnt my cup of tea. and i do think the relationship shown in the show between keith and shiro is a lot more mature and healthy than the one shown between lance and keith. lance has some good moments! but canon lance and fanon lance seem like two entirely different people to me a lot of the time and thats all cool and fine if ur lookin for that, again im not here to stop ppl from having fun, but there are so many good sheith moments in the show and im just glad to see the relationship between two dudes depicted that way regardless of whether it becomes canon or not. also lance in the show is only shown being attracted to girls, and in kinda a skeevy way - like ive met guys who treat me like that and been Very off-put by that kind of behavior. and it would put me off if after all that they got him together with keith. like hes just superficially interested in all these hot girls but keith, who he has very few heartfelt intimate moments with onscreen, is his True Love? like thats,, not good bi rep. i Do rly like the bond hes been building with allura since they switched lions, that seems like its going in a direction that could turn out to be very wholesome and sweet. but again, if klance is ur thing, by all means have a ball.

k that was a lot but tl:dr i like 2 cry and sheith provides me with lots of opportunities to do that,, if u read it all then thank u deeply and truly for ur attention, u probs Understand me as a person a bit better than before lol

#long post #voltron spoilers #s4 #sheith #this got Very long im sorry #voltron #shenanigansintime

[diamondarmored-blog1]

Just some stuff from yesterday’s post nothin’ special particularly--

@corditeheart  Idek, it's so small that people think one comment speaks for the entire fandom

INCOHERENT HOWLING NOISES. I can’t even comprehend this mindset. Clearly I am still a summer child who knows not the struggle of fandom veterans. I was relatively late to the party and it’s still my firm opinion that people can do what they want as long as it’s not in an attempt to overwrite someone else. I sort of assume everyone else feels like that as well, so it’s never occurred to me to take one comment as law.

@ahmyhotdog I can only speak from where I've been. Most people in this fandom are nice. This is true. I've met way more nicer people than not nice. But I think part of the issue is if you don't want to people with certain people for whatever reason then a lot of others just don't seem to play with you as well? Or it could just simply be once you find people you enjoy playing with you just end up not looking for new muns to play with.

That’s true, actually! So it could be partly down to misreading peoples’ motivations for doing that? I would usually assume it’s because our headcanons don’t mesh, though I will say that’s happened to me elsewhere. I don’t think it’s the fault of the collective though, I think there are just arseholes wherever you go. Idk, I hear “x is a bad fandom” and I think of Bloodborne (INB4 SOMEONE IS A BLOODBORNE PART TIMER AND TAKES OFFENCE... @ them, come on, man, you know exactly what I mean here. BB is a mushroom cloud on the horizon for everyone else). 

@eruditorem I’ve heard things but honestly ive never seen anything and everyone has been so welcoming??? so idk either. also i dont pick my nose, i pick my butt. i  mean... wait-- dont reply to that

Mostly adding this so everyone knows Bri picks her butt

@legendaryturk Hmm.  Well I'm kind of newish to the fandom at least for RP, and I think...things just go in cycles?  I've seen ups and downs in various fandoms - not just 8, but also ffvii, doctor who, mgs, and tons of other fandoms I've RPed in.  overall I'd say ff8 has been mostly welcoming to me? it's small, and tumblr being the animal it is, people may just flock toward others who share similar writing styles or fanon. Idk, if I find I have something in common with another mun, be it writing style or fanon ideas, I'll kind of squee with them over it, but I *never* do so with the intent of excluding others, kwim? that said, there are times where I feel like muns talk around me and there's a joke I'm not in on, but, I think that's just the beast that is tumblr, and not fandom related tbh.

You were in MGS tho//// / ?!?!?/q/1/

That part about not doing it with the intent to exclude is so important tbh. So far, I’m getting the impression that most of it is misunderstanding. I can’t imagine anyone I’ve come across so far being deliberately dickish in that way. Eg, there’s one person I can think of who doesn’t really want to acknowledge me, but that’s okay, cos I know they’re a heavy Seiferx[redacted] shipper and I’ve already said I’m not, so I’d not be much use to them. We still follow each other, though, and I can’t think that they’d be all like YOU CAN’T SIT WITH ME if I spoke to them.

@diosleighrp  There's douchenozzles in every fandom who try to dictate what other fans can and can't do. It's quite unfortunate, but there are just entitled brats everywhere.

I can’t say much about this, I haven’t had it! Idk why. Maybe I’m too babbymode for the haters to have found. I have had it elsewhere though so I know what you mean and you’re right, they are definitely lurking somewhere. They’re lurking everywhere. 

@lionseed Just like American politics, it's the small angry voices that get the most attention for some reason. Sometimes there's a bad experience, and people take that as proof the fandom is shit.

MMMM and there’s always people with a bad experience to talk about because nowhere’s perfect, so I guess it’s partly on the reader to be on it enough to realise that. I would like if people within the fandom wouldn’t say that about all currently participating members though :( Obviously people can talk about their experience, good or bad, but their experience is with a person, not all of us. 

@underplater Okay, so. I will say that what I've personally experienced with the ff8 fandom is a lot of, "oh wow, I really like your blog and your take on the character you're doing. That's wonderful!" "Oh awesome, do you maybe want to do something with her/him/me?" "Uh... Maybe." Which... Means no. And then people are always all, "You just keep doing you, dear, it's wonderful," but no one sends in memes or replies to stuff? And it just.. I always feel like I'm pressed up against the glass, looking in.So I'd say my experience with the ff8 comm has definitely been that it's very insular and hard to for me, personally speaking, to break in on. ... Sorry, I'm fairly sure this was about my comment earlier? I think I was the one who used insular.... Unless, of course, I guess the problem could be me? But if it is, I wish someone would tell me so that I could drop the muses and just stop cluttering up people's dashes.

JJKASHDJASHFGGHFJDSJJHH this hurt me to read and is the main reason I’ve made time to do this reply post rn. I couldn’t remember who said what, to be honest with you and it surprises me that it was you, purely because you’re always one of the first people to come to mind when I think of “the FFVIII community”, you seem like a valued part of it to me, even if you’re not one of the most active. YOU ARE DEFINITELY NOT THE PROBLEM. I can’t really say with 100% certainty what *is*. With the meme thing, I think it depends what it is. If someone reblogs one of those “send me x and I’ll tell you about y”, I try to send it, but if it’s a starter or something that feels thready, I won’t unless I have an idea to back it with, cos it doesn’t feel any different to writing an actual starter for me. I’d rather do that, but I won’t do it uninvited/randomly because that’s putting pressure on someone who didn’t ask for it. If a lot of people do the same as me and don’t mention it, then that could be a big factor because people can well end up waiting for each other to approach without realising it. It might also be something to do with you having multiple blogs (particularly Reno) and that altering your perception. The reason I say that is because I had the exact same thing myself, I had a male muse in a fandom and everyone loved him - mostly everyone wanted to lowkey do him tbh - and I had a female one who got comparatively zero attention because she wasn’t as accessible to such a wide audience. Ellone in particular is a complex character and it’s a sad fact that people tumblr-wide aren’t always into the idea of paying attention to something before they interact with it. Reno is much more easy to interact with in a casual way, since he’s had more exposure in source material and is widely regarded as being a fun, not-serious character (though I acknowledge he very likely IS, and I know from experience that you will have put a lot of thought into him - I love Reno and anything that gives him some substance). He attracts people from further afield, people who might have only seen Advent Children or only know him through fan works. Ellone doesn’t have a movie or much fanfic, and she’s not really subject of the most popular speculation (lbr - by that I mean “who she’s sleeping with”), so she doesn’t have that far a reach. Your Ellone is so valuable to the whole community, you have a hell of a lot to share in your headcanons and your ideas. I haven’t seen you use Julia too much yet, but I’m sure she’ll be that way too. I think you should pick one of those ideas, pick someone who seems like they could pull it off and tell them about it, because I’m so sure 90% if not 100% of us would thread them with you. That’s all I do tbh!! I’m always prepared for someone to say no, but mostly they’re happy to have been approached with an idea to use as a starting point. PLEASE DON’T DROP THEM. You’re not cluttering up anything. I’m sure I’m not the only one who’s sad to see you inactive on her whenever you are, tbh. I don’t think you realise how essential she is. I know it’s a small, slow fandom, but anything you post raises the overall standard for the sheer fact you did it, and it had your characteristic level of consideration put in. Course, I’m probably biased, cos I think I can tell when people work more behind the scenes than out front on their muse and the related background and I appreciate that, always have.

@misplacedxheroics .... I'm hoping this is permitted that I comment, as it was my blog where you read this post. I'm only addressing what I've experienced in the community, not trying to speak for everyone here. In my personal experience with VIII, more often than not, I see a lot of the insular behavior mentioned. Several blogs that start up are made to feel so unwelcomed that they leave or close up shop. Then there are the pass/agg anons, the ones who attack strong female characters (OC or otherwise) and 'correct' headcanons for canon characters. Whoever the person is, I have to believe it's just one single person. But anons have begun to reach out and outright tell people who they can or can't write with, which is baffling. And lastly, I'm guilty of this, and I'll own it -- We also become so comfortable and so familiar with who we write with we don't try out other players. There's also the overlap of muns playing with 'private' blogs. To me, the word 'private' tells me I don't have access to them. So what's the bother in following or engaging if everyone who writes muses that are in the fandom closed off to the rest of us? I can't say how the fandom should be run, I know I'm the least liked person in this fandom but this is my experience. A very polarizing, cold and unwelcoming experience.  We need to communicate more among one another, set clear boundaries and maintain community and unity, imo.

I think private is just a word people slap on a blog to make it look legit these days, or as a get-out clause if they find themselves followed by some kind of My Immortal Eldritch horror. Least, that’s what I’ve seen in my travels. Private blogs seem to favour their existing friends, but be open to others who will bring them ideas. I had one blog I called private and that’s because I kept getting people saying “wanna rp?” and I’d be like “yeah okay” and they’d literally say “alright you come up with an idea then”. ? / / //???? Also... I’m trying to word this in the least mean-sounding way possible because I’m not one to shit on anyone’s parade, but if I’m really honest with you, I had to unfollow you on an older blog because you were posting vagues about people so often. I don’t mind when people vent, but it got to the point where it was almost every day someone was on blast and I felt like I’d walked in on a family argument. You can do what you want with your blog, it’s on me to unfollow if I don’t like it, so I did. But. Any oversensitive person seeing it probably assumed you meant them and that might have something to do with you finding it difficult to connect with people. You follow that up by slating the entire fandom when it’s not exactly a fandom problem, which makes people less likely to approach you as you’ve already indirectly blasted them. I’ve had people tell me more than once that you’ve posted something about me without naming me; notably when you made a point of reblogging that one anti-Xu post from an inactive account after saying you hate people who disagree with you “on purpose”. I had just posted a silly Xu support one liner that got a few reblogs. I don’t really have a fig to give whether it was about me or not, but it’s a good example of how a vaguepost causes negative ripples. If one person assumed that was about me, another ten probably guessed it was someone else. I was welcomed to the fandom with a couple of how-do-you-dos and an anon telling me to stay away from you or you’d bully me into deleting. That was the first of several. Then you got that anon telling you to stop sending me hate when you hadn’t (what basis did that have?), and one of your friends for some reason assumed I was the one who had sent it and demanded that “anon” show IP proof, which gives the impression that they’d been led to believe it was me for some reason. I know you said you didn’t understand the logic behind me saying that, but we’re both running Statcounter, you know as well as I do how it works and what the implications are of saying that. It’s also how I know the anons I’ve had that I’ve mentioned are not all one person. Maybe it really was a totally out-of-nowhere thing that person said, but when you combine it with the vagues and the assertions that there’s a split in the fandom that no one else (so far) has detected, it causes bigger problems than it would on its own. I’m not trying to put you on blast, this ain’t a callout post and I haven’t taken any of it to heart - it’s no big deal to me - I’m just trying to offer an outsiders’ perspective because I read this as you being honestly oblivious to it, and if I didn’t I’d either have to ignore your comment or lie to you, neither of which I think you’d appreciate - and I assume since you made the effort to drop in despite not following me that you would want a response.

#ooc. #in which charlie tries not to sound like a massive axe wound but probably ultimately does #you try being me and talking serious talk #the tone never feels right #tbd. #tba.?