#LITERALLY LISTEN TO IT FOR SELF CARE

[agentark]

a purely self indulgent whatever this is about a vibe I love

there's just something about an eerie town, a few old friends, a slowly building sense of dread, radio static, an outsider, I think we're being watched, remembering

oxenfree 🤝 the fernweh saga

Aelsa Trevelyan - The Fernweh Saga, Book 1 // The Beast From 20,000 Fathoms // Oxenfree - Night School Studio // Paramore - Figure 8 // Aelsa Trevelyan - The Fernweh Saga, Book 1 // Oxenfree - Night School Studio // Trocadero feat. Meredith Hagan - Contact Redux // unknown // Aelsa Trevelyan - The Fernweh Saga, Book 1

#am I transmitting? is anyone listening? #I literally played through book 1 of the fernweh saga 4 times and went - dang I need to replay oxenfree #come get your loops kids #won't say what kind - time/physical/self inflicted/generational; could be one could be all #being trapped in a gravity well of a place is a true bonding experience #fernweh saga #oxenfree #web weaving #I wasn't gonna tag this but what if I convince someone to consume either of these pieces of media #there's something missing from this but it's probably better than adding 1400 additional photos #it's literally just self indulgent who cares if it's incoherent #I feel like bly manor could fit in here as well #the whole - she would wake / she would walk / she would sleep / she would forget bit #the 'it's you it's me it's us' #the ghosts being trapped at bly and the living always coming back

[shima-draws]

The fact that this won’t even be the LAST time Sanji gets horribly manipulated by another woman. I’m just 😔

#HE’S A SIMP and girls take advantage of that too often 😭 #AND THE FACT THAT he still forgives them anyway!! Even after putting him through hell!! #Listen say what you want about Sanji but there’s no denying that he’s. SUCH a good person #Too good of a person who is endlessly kind and caring and forgiving #Sanji gives and gives and gives and never takes. He’s so stupidly selfless sometimes it makes me want to cry #And people take advantage of that so often :’( #HE’S A GOOD BOY!!! He doesn’t deserve this #Shima speaks #One Piece #Sanji #Black Leg Sanji #He literally became my favorite (besides Luffy) for this exact reason #The fact that he’s so self sacrificing. The fact that he gives himself entirely to other people #And doesn’t expect anything in return #And has so little self worth I just. FUCKING hell dude. #His attempted sacrifice at Thriller Bark was a really big thing too #’They can always find another cook’ that was probably his thought process #BUT SANJI MY LOVE. THEY CAN NEVER FIND ANOTHER SANJI. ANOTHER YOU #If Sanji had taken Zoro’s place he WOULD have died. And that would have fucking torn Luffy APART #SLAMS MY HEAD INTO THE GROUND UGHHH SANJI. I LVOE YOU

[caffeinatedopossum]

As someone who has (supposedly) been actually tortured, I do think it's fair to use a word as extreme as torture to refer to the mental anguish that one can experience

#self contained (?) mental anguish i mean since psychological torture is very real #it takes a lot for physical pain to get to the point that you want to kill yourself about it #now im questioning if i deserve to be able to say this >_< #listen this isnt pain Olympics. someone did have it worse than me im sure and i dont particularly care #unless that person is literally you and you want to have a productive conversation about it #thats actually encouraged tbh #im just tired of people talking for the people who 'had it worse' when in reality those people are usually very kind and understanding

[brother-genitivi]

sunset girl

another Remzi Taşkıran study ft Destan before Lothering is destroyed

#dragon age #dragon age 2 #da2 #femhawke #dragon age hawke #purple hawke #da hawke #female hawke #destan hawke #my art #turkish tag #yeah. she’s a sunset colours kinda girlie #i love the original painting so much and all his artwork tbh #listening to the sacrifice of faramir while drawing her is a little :( of me #also she’s like… quite young here. literally 20. and she has natural prominent eyebags hehe #bc self care. all my ocs have natural eyebags idgaf

[crystalleoi]

5C

#inanimate insanity #ii mephone5 #ii mephone5c #my art #listen man. these two (+ 5S) are like inherently connected in my mind. even though they've never met canonically #created by a man who does not truly care about them or their well-being and only values them bc they are still new and useful to him #& died trying to kill their predecessor. but their efforts wouldn't have mattered anyway because they would've been replaced in like a year #did they know they would be replaced? did they just have to live with the knowledge that they would one day no longer matter to cobs? #these tags r only tangentially related to the artwork. i'm losing it i fear #anyway a headcanon that's actually kinda related to this art: #i imagine that cobs gave more preferential treatment to 5S because he had more advanced tech nd stuff #and 5C developed like a weird relationship w her self-esteem where she (like the other mephones) kind of has an inflated ego #she readily compliments herself (literally called herself “the most colorful beauty in existence”) #(partially bc she's kinda compensating for not getting as much praise from cobs as 5S) #(i also think she tends to seek validation from others (e.g. “i'm made of plastic. neat huh?”) because of that) #but she doesn't talk up how advanced her tech is because it's from Last Year #you don't understand how long this headcanon has been microwaving in my mind. it's been YEARS. i've never unleashed it until now #it's probably stupid but WHATEVER MAN. i'll overanalyze these phones as much as i want #this is what happens when your favorite characters show up in like 1 episode and die. you go insane

[cynicallyneutral]

how do u like ur toast? i’m bored as hell and will do literally anything but draw. lemme know which and why, and what do u put on it (if u do)

#honestly i will literally do anything but draw #these past few months ive been doing…idk if u can like #call it self care or what #but i been tryna eat a lil better and move a lot more #so i been playing basketball #not like a match or whatever bc idk shit #and then lifting weights and running #bro i swear to god i have weights in my room now #kirishima are u proud of me #ive also been looking to join some kickboxing classes #literally doing anything BUT draw #HAAHHAHSHHFHFH #but HEY!!! im stronger than before now #and i wanna learn how to punch a bitch and make it hurt yanno #and hopefully one day i will be able to lift my weight and more #god i rly do wanna go back to drawing tho #but i do wanna keep on playing bball #and still lift weights #and theres just so little time like why do i have to choose like this #i also wanna be good at dancing #listen theres just so much i wanna do now #i miss drawing #this looks like an ad ngl

[ballisterboldheart]

couldn't stand the thought of missing out on the rest of our life together.

#why r u mad bc jarmen clowns keep winning ? #cobrakaiedit #cobra kai #carmen diaz #johnny lawrence #s.gif #changed my mind jarmen isnt underdeveloped you're all just haters #because okay listen <- things said before writing a wall of text #johnny's arc w carmen is ALL abt him taking responsibility. he's a man who has run away from literally Everything in the past 30 years. #he's run away from ck/his past w kreese he's run away from his son he's literally on the outskirts of society. #he doesn't. he doesn't CARE enough abt anything to stick w it when it gets hard. #and everyone lets him. no one makes him accountable. #but. for the first time. w miguel. he doesn't want to run away from something. #and i think its so important the carmen and johnny's first Real interaction is when johnny is carrying miguel #home after he got his ass beat. #he's taking that responsibility/that punishment for having failed. #and yeah. he spirals afterwards. self flagellates. and then drags his ass back and promises to be Better. #and he is! he does NOT give up he does not run away ever again #hs fight happens carmen says she never wants to see him again but johnny doesnt take that as a sign to Go Away #instead he helps out however he can while still respecting that boundary #and just ughhhhhhhh that fucking. ''i'll do whatever it takes / i know you would'' exchanges is like. the best way to sum it up #it takes a While for johnny to earn that trust. but he does. #anyways. normal. #long post

[buppypuppy]

.

#vent post essay ahead lol #having complexes about talking about your emotions is literally the fucking devil . its miserable. it sucks so bad. #the aamount of damage that is caused to someone by like #i mean im talking abou t me here obviously. #being the person whose like. overall ultimately tends not to feel horrible as often is like. #it's nice not feeling bad emotionally all the time but also it's like. i develop this complex about being like able to help. #i don't feel bad anywhere near as often as my friends so i can help them out and listen to them vent i can have the mental room to #like listen to them talk about their problems. yeah. but it makes me feel like. well this is my job now so i shouldn't fucking talk about m #i shouldnt vent when i feel bad because that's not what i'm known for. plus my friends already all feel worse than me more often than me. s #i don't want to dump any more on their plate than they have to deal with. i don't want to burden them anymore than i have to. and like it's #it's hard. i hate fucking talking about it and it's made so much worse when its like people i love . always been a fucking problem becaus #i just feel fucking horrible admitting that i feel bad i hate that so much. i don't want to like turn away people who care about me but li #i feel like if i tell them what's wrong with me i'll like do it anyways. i feel like i come off as super normal and happy go lucky and like #ostensibly fine. so when i admit this shit its like. oops the facade is cracking!!!!!! uh oh uh oh you can't help people so you feel bad!!! #because your fucking npd has made you feel self centered in a way that means you want to help people or some shit i dont fucking know #and so when i feel bad or get mad over something unreasonable it's like. well i hope i fucking keel over and die or something i dont like . #i don't want people seeing me like this or whatever. and my stupid fucking personality disorder just ruins every god damn thing its so bad. #my past experiences giving me complexes that lead to me feeling fucking left out over like small stupid stuff but god the worst part is lik #my brain categorizing something as being ''My Thing'' so somebody else talks about liking my thing AFTER my brain has designated it mine #makes alarm bells go off and feel like theyre fucking. i don't know encroaaching on my turf or what the fuck ever? it SUCKS ASS #it makes me feel HORRIBLE . and it's like i'm not gonna fucking bring it up because i don't wnt to be like a dick but also it's like well. #i feel fucking miserable about this but it's just like mean and unnecessary and cruel to like stifle people's fucking fun because of my dum #fuckin complexes. it's fucking constant. like oh look at you girl you feel fucking left out because you never get characters who really gri #you mentally and so now you have one but oops! someone else talked about them and now you're seeing red! you like this person though #so you're gonna feel fucking MISERABLE about this . you're gonna feel HORRIBLE because of this. and there's nothing you can fucking do #and it controls my goddamn life and i HATE IT i fucking HATE IT i wish i knew how to fix it. ghghrgurghrughruhg i want to fucking explode #and then you feel bad about feeling bad because you are fucking sisyphus. you're sisyphus. and your own anger is your boulder. you ingrate. #i hate this. i just wanted to have a good day. #jane mary cry one tear

[floral-hex]

Just canceled all of my future therapy appointments. Big fudgin’ bummer. Did I mention I lost my insurance? Didn’t even find out about that until the day it lapsed. Trying to find a way to fix it now, reapplying and whatnot, but ya know, it’s bureaucracy so who knows how long it’ll take. Just fingers crossed I don’t run out of meds first.

lol it’s underwater 🐠

#ugggghhhhh so sad #like genuinely I think my therapist rocks #he’s the best one I’ve ever had. nice and cool but no BS and just harsh enough to push me #I feel like such a baby for saying it but literally the number one thing I’ve wanted these last few weeks was to go to therapy #I had to skip my last appointment so I haven’t seen him in weeks #between my mom’s organ transplant and driving back and forth to see her everyday and taking care of my bros aaand super suicidal birthday #I’m just… I’m tired. I want to vent. I just want to spill my guts for an hour and maybe cry a lot #and I can’t do that with anyone else. I know that’s dumb to say #I 100% can’t complain to my family because ya know I gotta be strong and they don’t need me being a burden #and I love my mutuals but I don’t know any of you anywhere well enough to feel comfortable venting #I mean. y’all can vent to me all day. I’ll gladly listen to you talk about yourselves. I’m here for it. I just can’t do it myself 😕 #I’m so tired and anxious and I don’t want to really get into the self harm talk but I’ve had some serious self destructive thoughts lately #I don’t know what I’m going to do #I have to believe it’ll get better #because if I don’t believe that then… what’s the point? #also.. I’m really fucking lonely. just to throw that out there. if you can’t tell by my reblogs. #I am like desperately and ravenously lonely and full of longing #and you add that to everything else it’s just the sad little cherry on top… #now I want an ice cream sundae… mmmm…. #I need 1000 hugs and to sit with someone and maybe get fucked up and complain and sit in silence and and and blegh #but that’s life. it’ll be… it’ll be whatever it is. #sorry. this is a bit too heavy for this time of morning #I’ve been sick. really bad vertigo and vomiting and I’m just wiped out and sad #but I love you stranger or at least I like you enough to be okay with you reading this #okay be safe #goodbye forever #text

[sapphicsnzs]

currently crying in the library while studying

#self obs #i’m so stressed and anxious i wanna scream #i hate being negative cause i don’t wanna put my energy on anyone else #but fuck i’m so tired of being positive all the time #i literally have been having bad week after bad week and i can’t talk to anyone about it #i also feel like i’m everyone’s emotional sounding board and no one does the same for me and then i have to hold all my frustration in #no one even asks me how i am anymore or cares enough to listen to the answer #this sounds so dumb but everyone around me only talks about themselves #like literally the past two days i’ve hung out with friends and both times people there were like i didn’t even know that was going on #i’m just so tired of feeling like no one cares about me or that i’m wasting my energy when i say a single thing about myself #i have therapy tomorrow and i feel like it’s gonna be a cry through the whole session kinda day #i’ll probably delete this in like 20 minutes cause i’m being stupid

[kahin]

sort of thinking abt. how suicidal i've been since. the move here. i cant stand living here another day if i have to go outside and interact with people who clearly dont seem to give a shit about me n dont ACTUALLY care abt my culture or my people / brothers and sisters im going to fucking pop.

#sowwyy to the arabs and victims (settlers) who are affected by the longstanding #conflict in the region #fisher's lake! #how has anyone allowed this to go on? this fake superficial shit that goes on here in the west? #the fact theres a whole course dedicated to teaching students abt indigenous people but on o./ct7 i get a fucking #loudspeaker message loudly declaring like yeah. and u can suck my dick longstanding conflict MY ASS #how is anyone okay with this? back home we would have fucking flipped if someone said that shit to us #students are literally voicing their concerns back home abt not being able to take action and here #theyre able to but they dont fucking care #im going to school everyday while people of my ethnicity are being killed. MURDERED. and what? i have to worry about an english paper #while everyone chants both sides? we need to listen to the killers perspective too? enough. i cant #nto only that but whenever i talk abt my culture or pass the hallways i always get these like looks. like im taking up too much space #and it feels like im the only one rlly. i cant take it. i cant take it. i am going to kill myself #these people. ma byestehu 'ala haalon. they have no self respect and they have no respect towards others and they are backwards #rant

[eosofspades]

next gen (2018) is the best movie ever for a lot of reasons but the biggest, most integral one that i've never seen anybody actually address before, is that it is fundamentally a story about being a very young child who is suffering so much emotional pain and the experience of that pain not being taken seriously by anyone around you. mai's anger issues and crushing loneliness are absolutely integral to any reading of the story's themes, and not only is her pain a driving force, but it is validated by the narrative. the story doesn't mock her for having "daddy issues," she's not just a whiny or dramatic little girl; she is ABSOLUTELY justified in feeling lonely and hopelessly angry, and the movie goes out of its way to show you things from HER perspective. and at the end, the "lesson" she had to learn wasn't that she was WRONG about how she viewed her mother and her situation - in fact, her MOM is the one who has to learn that she was mistreating her daughter and hurting her.

the movie also takes so much care to honestly and realistically show how that loneliness can manifest in the most destructive of ways - mai is ALLOWED to be angry, she is allowed to be rude and abrasive and destructive, and while it is portrayed as a problem and something that needs to be addressed, the narrative never BLAMES her for it - because she is a child reacting in a real, emotional, raw, human way to her trauma and pain.

what i'm trying to say is i have never seen a film before that takes a child's feelings of misery as something so valid. the narrative NEVER condescends to her character, it never comes across as patronizing. and the movie isn't about having to forgive the people who hurt you, but instead it's about the importance of not letting that pain stop you from making NEW memories and better relationships. it's so real and RAW and full of love and ultimately, it is about how even one person looking at you and saying "i see your pain, and i'm not going anywhere" and meaning it can be enough to save you.

#literally this movie is so fucking good. go watch it right now #my favorite film of all time. unbeatable in catharsis in validation in ENTERTAINMENT #and that's not even getting into the animation or soundtrack bc my GOD both of these things are BANGING #and the ANGST. ohhhh my god this movie will rip your fucking heart out #like. how do i actually describe it. this movie is about being a mentally ill child from the child's perspective #any other movie would have had mai need to learn the lesson that her parents were doing what they thought was right or some bullshit #but nope! next gen says your mom IS doing a bad job! and you deserve to be angry about it!! you are right to be angry about your #dad fucking off when you were 4!!! that DOES suck for you and it DOES suck that nobody fucking LISTENS #this is a kid screaming for someone; anyone to listen to her or care about her pain and then she meets 7723 and he DOES #AND ITS A MOVIE ABOUT HOW MENTAL ILLNESS CAN MAKE YOU PUSH PEOPLE AWAY AND SELF SABOTAGE #AND THE IMPORTANCE OF *LETTING* PEOPLE HELP YOU AND TRUSTING THEM TO HOLD YOUR HEART GENTLY....... #i restate. this movie is so fucking good. go watch it if you haven't i am not asking #mine #next gen #next gen netflix #netflix next gen #long post

[summertimemusician]

*is rereading the Four Swords Adventures Manga again to refresh self after replaying Pocket Mirror (RPG Maker Game)*

*Almost drops coffee* Oh holy Hylia. Enjel and Shadow could talk.

Created by the person who's basically the main antagonist? Check.

Fifth secret part out of a protagonist split into four? Check.

Is forced to follow after the protagonist in shadow/reflection like fashion and hates every second of it to the point they're willing to lie and manipulate to take their place? Check.

Wants that specifically because they're jealous and never were love or wanted in their life, so they desperately want someone, anyone to look at them like they're worth something, no matter what they have to do for it desperately craving the love they've seen someone else get even if it's not real because they've just taken over/are pretending to be that person? Check.

Dies tragically due to shattering? Sometimes only getting the care they've wanted through that death after being swayed into not fulfilling their original purpose and returning to the protagonist? Triple check.

That or it's the sleep deprivation making me see parallels between two artificial beings created from the shadow of the protagonist and has a strong association with mirrors.

... Now I want a Zelda/Linked Universe Pocket Mirror Au, with Four/Four Swords Link as the protagonist (or Green as the protag) and Shadow in Enjel's role, or maybe Lisette's (though I feel Blue or Vio would be better for Lisette), Vaati can be the Pumpkin King he's dramatic enough for it, though I dunno which colors would best fit Fleta and Harpae. Maybe Link's Father or Dot made the deal this run around? I can absolutely see Shadow describing Four as "Mr.Goody Two Shoes" through a mirror, or any of the endings being played out by them.

#linked universe au #kinda? #lu four #lu shadow #Pocket Mirror Au #listen #I just think Shadow and Enjel should get to go to therapy #where they both cynically bond over being created by someone wishing the protagonist ill but being brought over to their side #through someone actually caring for them #G------ and Four can bond over mirror trauma with Twilight in the back #I can also see Shadow in Lisette's role really easily though frankly him and Vio are both extra and feral enough for it lol #Four Swords Adventures Link/Four from LU 🤝 G----- from Pocket Mirror having a story with themes of self acceptance #through learning to coexist with the different aspects of their personhood and to accept even an aspect not fully theirs #I could go on but I'm sleep deprived and need to do some actual writing lol #plus I doubt anyone would like to listen to me overanalyzing Four or Shadow for hours the essay is literally hours long

[ffelii]

To any busy-brained people wanting to meditate more often:

I wish someone had told me sooner that meditation isn't only helpful when you're being guided or focusing purely on your breath.

Anyone out there with busy brains that never seem to shut up, use that to your benefit during meditation!!

Of course so many of us don't feel too inclined to meditate, despite knowing the benefits. It sounds!!! So fucking boring!! Who wants to sit in silence and spend 10-30 minutes trying and failing to focus on one thing! Not us!!!

UNTIL. Until you realize that you can actually use that busy brain to your advantage. Use it to emotionally process some shit you've been pushing down for forever, use it to think about all the good things that happened today, or even the bad.

When it comes to the bad, you could spend ages picking it apart.

"What could I of done better?"

"What didn't I like about that?"

"Why didn't I like that?"

"How can I work through that feeling?"

And picking it apart like that is so insanely helpful. If it gets too much, you can bring yourself back to your breath. Count to yourself as you draw a breath in, and let it out slowly.

Suddenly a 30 minute meditation I normally would've found impossible to sit still for, goes by so damn fast. I end the session almost wishing I gave myself more time, and I can tomorrow!

I cannot stress enough how important meditation is. How important emotional processing is, especially in world where distracting yourself and running from those emotions is so damn easy.

We all need to get better at spending time with ourselves, not just our distractions.

#feli thoughts #mental health #self care #meditation #mindfulness #neurodivergent #intrusive thoughts #autism #ocd #adhd #ptsd #bpd #literally any other disorder that has your brain running a million miles per hour constantly #Shakes u guys LISTEN UP!!!

[hhow-queer]

“worst case scenario the world loses another monster” oh jon

#i’m literally gonna cry wtf #he has. absolutely no self preservation atp huh?? #hell do anything to protect the people he cares about… #AUUHHGNG #hhow listens to tma #tma #jon sims #jonathan sims #the magnus archives

[youretoosweetforme]

.

#just venting #you dont need to read #and if you choose to you dont need to respond at all #why does everything need to be so fucking difficult #literally everything is just too much #i hate it #i cant focus #i cant listen #its so distressing that i just start crying whenever i have to try #and i cant even fucking take care of myself #i dont think ive eaten enough today #i genuinely cant tell if i’m not hungry or punishing myself at this point #tbh it’s probably both #half the time i cant even look in a mirror for more than a few seconds #i feel like throwing up or something #i hate this #i hate the pressure and the expectations and the way i cant handle either #if i had less self control i would have put a hole in the wall or shattered a mirror by now #antiopa #mack speaks to the void