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#Luther Hargreeves incorrect quotes
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Klaus: people are like trash cans...
Five: ?
Klaus: you stomp on their feet and their mouths opens...
Five: *sigh*
Klaus: oh, you don't believe me? LUTHER!
Luther: *comes in* what?
Klaus: *stomp on his feet*
Luther: *open mouth to yell*
Klaus: see?
Five: I see what you meant... *chuckle, eye roll* idiots.
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hihomeghere · 4 months
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I’m so normal about them
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topperscumslut · 2 months
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it’s literally him
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thehargreevesfamily · 5 months
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Five: Can you please be serious for five minutes? Klaus: My record is four, but I think I can do it.
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itstheghostofmypast · 5 months
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Five: If there is one thing I'm thankful for it's-
Diego: Your family?
Klaus: Bloodshed?
Luther: Alcohol?
Victor: Coffee?
Five:...
Y/N: Guys...can we please exchange our vows without interruptions?
Ben *hands Five a gun* arent you glad I'm your best man?
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we talk a lot about klaus, luther, and diego having no brain cells and being dumbasses but i think we failed to appreciate the absolute goddamn stupidity of allison being told multiple times that they were in a completely different timeline where nothing about their normal lives exists anymore, and then her immediately turning around and being like 'yeah but theres no reason as to why if i broke into my old house that my daughter wouldn't be there anymore right' like TF U THINK THAT MEANT
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thehandl3r · 2 years
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The Handler: I’m writing my autobiography. Any tips?
Five: Kill off the main character.
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kasinonightlife · 2 years
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Viktor: Could you guys at least try to see this from my perspective?
Diego: *Crouches down*
Klaus: *Kneels down*
Luther: *Sits on the floor*
Five: *Stands on a chair*
Viktor:
Viktor: I hate all of you.
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https-hargreeves · 4 months
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Allison (gets a call): Hello?
Kidnapper: We have your kid…
Allison: Claire?!
Kidnapper: What? No, your son
Allison (relived but confused): But I don’t have a son
Kidnapper (becoming frustrated): The who is the brunet kid who asked me for a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and then cussed us out when we didn’t have it?!
Allison: Oh my gosh they have Five!!
Five: I’m right here
Allison: Oh okay good!
Allison:…
Allison: OH MY GOSH THEY HAVE KLAUS!!
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tua-braindump · 1 year
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Luther: okay I called a family meeting because...
Ben: oh my god here we go again, what is it this time? Did you lose your favorite mug? Did someone put the toilet paper the wrong way again?
Everyone stares at Ben while Klaus tries not to die laughing.
Ben: ah fuck, I forgot y'all can hear me now.
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highlyincorrect · 4 months
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Luther: Good morning
Klaus: MORNING BITCHES, LETS GET THAT BREAD
Diego: Rise and grind! 💯💯💪💪😤😤
Viktor: 🌹 🌸 good morning all 💕 god bless 🌺
Five, sipping coffee: Morning motherfuckers
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eddies-guitar13 · 1 year
Conversation
Viktor: what do you call disobeying the law?
Five: a hobby
Luther: *stares intensely at Five*
Five:...that we don't engage in
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hihomeghere · 5 months
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moonyswritinq · 11 months
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five : "how did none of you hear what I just said?"
you : "I’ve been zoned out for the past two and a half hours."
diego : "I got distracted about halfway through."
klaus : "ignoring you was a conscious decision."
luther : "I heard what you said, just didn't understand."
allison : "yeah, I don't care what you were saying."
viktor : "was I supposed to be listening to you?"
five : "you're all FUCKING USELESS!"
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thehargreevesfamily · 2 years
Conversation
Klaus, in a high voice, holding barbie: hey ken! I was thinking about going back to school and starting a career!
Diego, in a deep voice, holding ken: nonsense, barbie. you’re staying home and having my kids
Allison: what the hell are you guys doing?
Klaus: playing systemic oppression
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itstheghostofmypast · 2 years
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*Hargreeves at Eliot's in the 60s*
Five: Care to explain?
*Y/N covered in blood*
Y/N: Uh...I started my period?
*horrified Diego pointing at the ax in her hand*
Five: As long as it was productive, I don't really care.
Y/N: I got you a briefcase~(ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*。*♡
Five: I love you.
Diego:NO BAD CHILDREN, BLOODBATHS ARE BAD
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