#MF constantly putting himself down and fearing what others think of him

[sucrows]

knock knock o/ 👉👈 i have... many madara mikejima thoughts. and im still thinking abt mutual obsession with him so uhhhhhh cw unhealthy relationship? we know why we're here... excuse me being annoyingly longwinded orz this is barely sexy. this is just me thinking abt mama im so sorry crow aaaaa

madara mikejima is the guy who would be at your service at all times— no questions just pure devotion. for as long as he is around you, you might as well say you have your own personal assistant. theres so many examples of him doing stuff for others and i will never shut up abt his fs1 where anzu was like hey what if your exclusive outfit was just a loincloth and he was on board purely bc she likes it. HE HAS 0 SHAME IN DOING EVERYTHING YOU SAY. NONE. YOU COULD ASK HIM TO BARK AND HE WILL. when that guy loves someone, he craves them with his entire being and desires nothing more than to be in their life.

he's also not above just. asking for a fwb situation. he wouldn't be so blunt about it, but it'd be a slow coercing. mama isn't above lying about his motives either. maybe he sees you're stressed and hey. let him massage your shoulders. lay down. oh your back is just tense huh? and it escalates until he's just fucking you with reckless abandon. well your stress is gone now so he offers to make this a regular thing. no strings attached and no worries. he just wants to make you relaxed.

here's where it gets messy. mama is also out of town a lot for work. he goes overseas, just touring around. but bc he spends every waking moment he is in town attached to your hip, his absence is so. prominent. and god it feels so awful not seeing him. phone calls arent enough. good morning and goodnight texts are sporadic because he's so busy. you miss having mama around to hold you while you do work.

and it's not great for him either. he's constantly worried about you. he can't get you out of his head. when he finally gets back it's like he's moved heaven and earth buying you various trinkets that reminded him of you (some even extremely rare and valuable since... he just collects those things anyway)

just. intense back and forth of hapoiness being with him every single day to devastating loneliness whenever he leaves. each time he comes back, ofc intense welcome home sex ensues. but it never goes past the fwb stage. any deeper feelings he's harboured are shoved aside and he grows distant when he feels like you want to get even closer. he always wants what he can't have. and he'd rather you not be caught up in whatever bullshit he goes through so he lies to himself saying he's content with meaningless sex and just doing things for you. even when you have consumed his entire thoughts. yet he's unaware that you are much the same. craving him more and more that you wanna get through to him. but HIS FUCKASS LONESOME WAYS MAKES YOU HESITATE. SO YALL JUST GO NOWHERE. AND ITS JUST A "what are we?" LOOP

mf.... madara just will not communicate. he can't go beyond superficial desires and acts of service because it scares him to face the fact these feelings have grown wildly out of control. it scares him because the moment he does, he fears his own self destructive tendencies will take over and he'll just ruin everything. whats more is that imo i think he would still unconsciously do things like distance himself, not speak to you for days even after coming back as like a way for you to grow to resent him. that way if things crumble he can just say oh the signs were there as if he didn't put those flags up himself.

uh yea 💚 thats all. uhm. unrelated i think youre super cool and i hope ya have/had a good day dependin on when you get to this 💚

minty i am going to become the JOKER if you do not stop apologizing for things i actively invited you to do and that is a THREAT /lh

anyways, this is soooo tasty idgaf if it's more angsty than horny i'm eating this up anyways, thank you for the meal 🙏

Madara Mikejima, King of Miscommunication. He adores you and puts you on such a high pedestal that it becomes nearly impossible to convince him to stand by your side as your equal. He believes that you deserve better so much but he's also too selfish to give you up. He's not worthy of you, but neither is anyone else.

He wants the emotional intimacy. He wants the domesticity. He wants everything. Hell, he probably indulges in these things pretty often in a FWB relationship, but he can't ever tie you down. The moment he gets the inclination that you're getting too attached, he runs. When you're truly in a time of need he will always be there for you but otherwise he's as fickle as the wind.

It's a horrendously painful but addicting relationship that neither of you can truly break off

#also thanks for asking about my day! it's uh. been a bit rough in all honesty but i'm still kicking! fun asks like this in my inbox make the #day better <3 #asks #ask.nsfw #ask.thirst #thirst #thirst.madara #nsfw.madara #mintys-musings

[noodlepai]

(OKAY okay so I've come to provide more information on the AU, I'm still working on it a lot so things might change or be added but I got a basic idea of what things are like rn !!)

Info dump moment rn, also TW for slight trauma mentions/hints

• Sam had managed to save the Wii from melting itself all those years ago, and is a pretty big person on tech, so she likes to experiment and try new things, and actively tries to help Eteled out or transfer him through devices so he isn't just stuck in one place all the time, with lots of trial and tons of error, especially since she knows the Wii's getting old and that it can be unstable occasionally with glitches

• Kyle has also taken a liking to learning more about technology through Sam's influence so he sometimes comes over and they both will just study and brainstorm ideas

• Sam moved out of her home and now lives in her own apartment, is in college to pursue her dream of working around and creating technology, hasn't really considered making a job out of it since she mostly does it for fun and likes to achieve her dream goals, Nathan and Kyle also occasionally visit to just hang out and do whatever, usually resulting in the three staying up very late into a movie or game night, and Eteled having to talk Sam into getting sleep for the next morning

• Even though Sam is big on all tech, consoles and video games, she still has a soft spot for old generation consoles in particular

• Sam, Nathan and Kyle had all gotten pretty close growing up so they're like a dumbass trio /lh

• Will moved out of state or some shit

• Kyle wakes up from his villain arc and makes a truce with Eteled /J.. FR though Kyle softens up and becomes more understanding of Eteled's side after they start talking it out, while what happened did bother him at the time all those years ago, he just kinda grew up to the point where it didn't have such of an effect on him anymore, I mean all he saw was a Mii get slice and diced, no need to go beast mode over it, so they forgive each other of the past

• Kyle and Nathan are besties to homosexuals, homie love

• Sam made a Mii of herself from when she was younger to keep Eteled company when going out or having to attend school, Eteled appreciated it but wouldn't wanna admit how it wasn't the same and about how much he would miss Sam when she had to get off the Wii

• Gives Eteled abandonment issues because I love being evil

• He's actually clingy on the inside but would never admit it to anyone

• Also views Sam as a sort of daughter figure besides just a friend but is too nervous to mention it, he wants Sam to be safe, loves whenever she talks or rants to him about anything or shows him something she made or is proud of, or even just anything at all, father Eteled is proud of his child/bestie

• He like, genuinely feels loved around her and would definitely cry about it but would never show it, or at least try not to

• Eteled has the favorite Mii pants because Sam put them on him, with quote "I think it's about time my best friend gets to rock a new style", and yes it did make him almost cry on the spot

• Austin is like, mentally conflicted as hell

• Austin and Eteled both feel guilty for what they've done to each other over the years, aren't sure they can or are ready to forgive the other but they're very slowly learning to tolerate each other

• They're like enemies to kinda friends in a way

• They're traumatized mfs

• They still sometimes fight but it's usually just yelling or saying shit now, they don't do the chair, deletion or axe really anymore since they at least got to the point where they respect each other's boundaries and triggers, and there's no point to keep doing the same old for over 10+ years, for the most part, they still slip up sometimes

• They do fuck up though occasionally so that's why Eteled has scars and Austin is a bit more bashed up

• They still have a rooted dislike for each other they're trying to get over but they sometimes chill out or talk, usually when Sam is asleep or off the Wii for a while, the two just will maybe visit or sit around to at least try to understand the other better

• Sam knows Austin is still around, and it took a while but with time she grew to accept him when he didn't seem like a big threat anymore, and that he was just as important of a soul as Eteled was, she still didn't like the fights and didn't know the full story

• She'd probably section them away from the other with a child gate if she could

• Austin of course has an ego and would never tell another soul that he has many nightmares of the server room and about what happens if he gets caught off guard or is sleeping when Eteled decides to attack him again, Eteled wouldn't do that, and Austin knows it but it's just the deep rooted fear he can't get rid of, even though he's much taller and technically more powerful than the smaller Mii

• Eteled is just tired, usually just sleeps in the Mii channel, especially when under stress or tires himself out if he's going through a moment, like triggered memories or emotions

• From all the deleting and the chair, and more crap from his early life, Eteled is just terrified of it all so even the idea of them scares the fuck out of him, so as a natural response he just tries to defend himself with his axe even if he would be shaking like a chicken, he really tries not to pull it out but he can't always stop himself

• The axe itself would probably also bother Austin a bit, but he would still try to cautiously calm Eteled down since he knows he's just afraid, so afterwards they'd probably have to awkwardly apologize for what the fuck happened at that very moment

• Sam sometimes offers them both to play a game together with her, or plans on playing with Eteled and invites Austin along, as a way to make them bond, they do end up having some fun though

• Eteled has seen and/or been around or within newer Nintendo consoles, but personally prefers being in the Wii since he's used to it the most, and it's the most comfortable and homey to him

• Oh yeah, if Austin or Eteled is having an episode or is deeply upset then the other will try to help sometimes if it's really bad, Austin tries to hide it more but it doesn't always work, yeah they have reasonable reasons to not like the other, but they aren't complete assholes

• They both got trauma memories and aren't gonna just watch the other suffer through it

• Austin may or may not have taken in what Eteled had said all that time ago about "Learning to move past the past", even though that technically makes Eteled a hypocrite when he's constantly beating himself up about shit mentally, even after years, they are both doing it tbh

• Also Kyle doesn't know about Austin 100% but is curious to know his story and who he is and used to be, and how he got in the Wii, especially after the passing of his family member of the same name, little does he know..

• Sam also doesn't know about any of it, neither Sam or Kyle know of what happened or Austin's story, Austin being in a tight spot since he doesn't wanna reveal his identity yet, knowing the possible reaction, for Eteled's sake, Sam's and especially Kyle's, and Eteled being absolutely fucking terrified since the fear of losing someone like Sam could become real, and the small but growing friendship he was slowly making with Kyle could go right back to hatred and wanting the small Mii deleted, not including the fact that he still eats at himself for his past actions so it being brought back up again would be a ✨mess✨

• Austin doesn't know if he forgives Eteled or not, but wants to try to move past it and not be reminded in any way

• Nathan is still a little lowkey scared of Eteled ngl, doesn't wanna upset him or anything and Eteled can tell, he probably sighs to himself but he can't blame the guy

• Kyle has thought about making another Mii of himself on what is now long been Sam's Wii, now that he's older and him and Eteled are rather chill, but decided against it since he wasn't sure, not because he didn't trust Eteled, but because he figured it could potentially remind the Mii of the past, so whenever he plays on it he just uses Eteled

(That's all I can really recall on the top of my head for now, whenever I remember more or add on things I'll probably make a new post about it)

#eteled #henry #corrupted mii #austin #sam #kyle #nathan #will #wdy #wii deleted you #au #still not sure what i want to do with the considered bully characters #if i decide to add them #or what i would do with the parental figures #still a lot to think about and work on but yeah #i dont mind ideas or possible suggestions for some characters #im just vibing with my au and having fun #*does a little dance*

[arhvste]

❝ haikyuu boys reacting to getting headlice ❞

an - i couldnt possibly tell you where the motivation to write this came from but here you go

HINATA SHOUYO

-> he doesn’t care. they’re little bugs living rent free in his head? who is he to kick them off his head when they’ve probably settled, made a nice home and got a growing family started? considerate king but disgusting

KAGEYAMA TOBIO

-> disgusted. but also thinks just a few rinses of water will do the trick. he doesn’t understand he’s actually got to get in there and pull them out. miwa is horrified walking into the bathroom to see tobio leaned over the bath with a tub full of cold water he’s ultimately wasted. he’s lucky miwa knows what she’s doing

TSUKISHIMA KEI

-> no mercy. rips the little mfs off his head like nobodies business. his brother can only stare in awe and disturbance. kei isn’t scared over a few bugs they’re only a minor annoyance. he won’t tell a soul he had headlice though and if anyone were to snitch on him, he’d probably shake a few off his head and onto yours.

YAMAGUCHI TADASHI

-> stressed. his hairs kinda long so they’re a pain the ass to get out some may think he’d be a little hesistant to tackle them alone but yams has several lice killing lotions in his bathroom ready to use. he is sympathetic but no way is he letting little bugs crawl around his head while he’s around tsukki

TANAKA RYUUNOSUKE

-> the bugs don’t even get to step on this kings prestine head,, next caller !!

NISHINOYA YUU

-> merciless. who tf do these bugs think they are stepping onto his territory? feral. probably put a few in a jar after pulling them out to bark at them and show them that they’ve crossed the line stepping onto his head

ASAHI AZUMANE

-> have sympathy for the guy they’re gonna be a nightmare for him. more upset than anything. now he’s being reduced to being ridiculed by tiny ass bugs too? give the guy a break. gets them out within the first day because he’s not going to suffer longer than he has to and continues doing the treatment for the rest of the week even though they’re certainly long gone

SUGAWARA KOUSHI

-> brutal. like tsukki he’s got no shame in just ripping them out. suga is the type of guy to catch spiders and gently let them out the window and not kill them. lice don’t get that treatment from him. will straight up throw them down the drain and smirk in the process

DAICHI SAWAMURA

-> just another minor occurrence for him. he’s got short hair it’s no biggie. will probably get his mother to help just to make sure he does it right but overall he’ll get rid of them effectively and quickly you wouldn’t even be able to tell he had them in the first place

KINDAICHI YUUTAROU

-> good. he deserves them. maybe this will teach him to get a good haircut. at least the lice like your cut g

KUNIMI AKIRA

-> tortures them after. probably wets a paper towel to keep them stuck to and jabs at them with a thin needle after he’s got them out. sadist little bitch probably has a deadpan expression while doing it too. the lice fear him across the country and avoid him from now on

KYOTANI KENTARO

-> again he’s got short hair so they’re not too big of a pain to get out but why the hell did they have to pick his head? probably picks them out and just throws them wherever he has no regard for where they land and who might catch them from him

HANAMAKI TAKAHIRO

-> little bugs are just chilling no biggie. probably tells the team he’s got them and shakes his head near them to piss them off. oikawa keeps his distance approximately 5 metres and refuses to be included in any rotation makki is in during practice. even after he gets rid of them he doesn’t tell the team and continues shaking his head near them just to ‘keep them on their toes’

MATSUKAWA ISSEI

-> won’t tell anyone other than makki. the two probably pick them out and throw them in oikawas direction leaving their captain confused as to why the hell the two of them keep throwing ‘nothing’ at him. probably gets rid of them within a week and sleeps with a shower cap on so they don’t touch his pillow, that’s his only rule while they spend their vacation on his head

IWAIZUMI HAJIME

-> isn’t scared of no bugs. probably would keep one and press it down just to stick in his childhood bug diary and sneers at how inferior the lice is compared to the other cooler bugs he’d caught before. his hairs short so again it’s not a huge issue for him. he’ll get rid of them quickly and effectively without too much hassle

OIKAWA TOORU

-> screams. begs iwa to take them out for him insisting that it’s his hobby but iwa rejects and leaves oikawa to handle it alone. oikawas sister dips as soon as she finds out and oikawa believes this is the end of his life. after a week of moping and being a brat, iwa gives in and sorts it out for him to finally give him a peace of mind.

LEV HAIBA

-> never had lice before and is genuinely interested rather than concerned. where did the little bugs come from? why do they like his hair so much? is he the chosen one? probably let’s them live on his head for a while until they become infuriatingly itchy and yaku finds out he’s been letting a cult of lice live on his head and forces him to get treatment

KOZUME KENMA

-> thinks bleach with solve it. everyone who hates kenma’s dark roots better be ready for them to go because he will just bleach the shit out of his hair and assume it’s killed them all. for the next few months his hairs gonna be nice but he’ll let his roots grow out again and you’ll secretly hope for him to catch lice again just so he’ll touch up his damn roots again

TAKETORA YAMAMOTO

-> it’s the blonde mohawk that’s the issue. why tf did he have to make his hair to awkward to work with. doesn’t take him long to get out but he probably picks them out walking home from practice or school and just chucks them in bushes or drains he walks past

MORISUKE YAKU

-> you really think he’s about to let some stupid bugs live on his head and not pay rent? absolutely not. has several different brands of lice treatment lotion and uses at least 4 in one go. that amount of chemicals probably isn’t good for you in one go but his only goal is to kill the lice which he achieves. these bugs are mercilessly killed, revived and killed again all in one treatment session

KUROO TETSURŌ

-> this hurt to write knows exactly how to kill them and won’t hesitate in doing so. by that i mean he’s going straight to his grandmother to do it for him because as much as he knows about treatment and such, nobody does anything better than his grandmother and he’ll sit in a chair with a towel around his neck chattering on about his day as his poor grandmother slaves over his head ripping out the stupid bugs from his inconviently styled hair. kuroo’s lucky his grandmother knows he’s her boy

AKAASHI KEIJI

-> bless his soul he’s horrified. disgusting little creatures, believes they’re vermin of the world. mutters in disgust at them as he watches them drown in the pool of water in his bathtub sink eventually sending them down the drain where he hopes they suffer a painful afterlife

KONOHA AKINORI

-> he’s grossed out but doesn’t make a huge deal about it. probably violates himself and gives himself the nickname ‘nitty nori the bug explorer’. he can take a joke and get rid of them in the same week. ugh king shit

BOKUTO KOUTARŌ

-> pain in the ass. he’s excited about these bugs but also worried? do they want to suck his blood? will they crawl into his ears at night? his sisters are the ones responsible with dealing with them and the whole time he’s asking a abundance of random questions regarding the lice and why they chose his head to make their residence

TENDŌ SATORI

-> probably sings at them to make them uncomfortable as he pulls them out. his fingers work magic as he flawlessly picks them out and sends them on their way down to the depths of the drain. the last thing these bugs hear is the terrifying voice of the man who mercilessly sent them to their death beds

USHIJIMA WAKATOSHI

-> his hairs short it’s okay it’s not the end of the world but rather than killing them he believes they have more use to them. he’s going to throw them in this soil in the garden and assume they work the same miracles worms do. he’ll be disappointed to know that they had no effect on his soil and he wasted his damn time making sure to evenly spread them out of the compost heap

MIYA OSAMU

-> will eat with a hat on. if these bugs are gonna live on his head no way is he sharing his food too. they’ve already taken enough from him. atsumu probably bullies him for his lice but freaks out when osamu tells him that because they’re twins, the lice will seek out his head too and they’ll both be infected. he only survives the short period of time with his lice because of the amusement he gets from watching atsumu consciously stay away from him even to the point where atsumu moves onto the couch. maybe he should let the lice vacate a little longer next time

MIYA ATSUMU

-> hates them. calls them every name under the sun but doesn’t actually effectively try to get rid of them. he doesn’t actually know how to get rid of them but is too embarrassed to admit it so he just lives with it. luckily, the lice decided to move in a few days before his hair was due for a touch up so like kenma, he just bleached the shit out of them and it seems to do the trick. it would be concerning had his hair not needed a touch up though who knows how long he would’ve had them.

SUNA RINTARŌ

-> his little sister notices his hand scratching his head constantly and begins to refer to suna as ‘nit boy’ and only ‘nit boy’. he doesn’t really care at first because surely a single shower will do the trick but his sisters provoking gets so annoying he just ends up treating them 7 times over but not before threatening to leave a few dead ones on his sisters pillow if she doesn’t stop calling him names

ARAN OJIRO

-> again, the lice don’t even get to step on his head. they see aran and they respect him. he seems like a nice and reliable guy so why would they go to the efforts of bothering him? probably nod their tiny ass antennas from atsumu’s hair and let aran go about his day in peace

KITA SHINSUKE

-> lice simply don’t exist in kita’s presence. the second a lice stepped foot on kita’s head, he senses it and ripped the mf off before it could even find a nice area to settle. lice keep away from kita at all times and never intend on crossing paths with him

KIYOOMI SAKUSA

-> an indescribable level of disgusted. refuses to accept it at first, insists that lice simply wouldn’t have been able to touch his head but alas he is wrong. tempted to shave his hair off but then again why should he have to suffer just because some stupid bugs said so. has no mercy, will treat his hair every day for the next month and a half and cusses the bugs out as they fall down the drain

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[imasimpforshanks]

omg I am so sorry I completely forgot to put the alphabet 😅 E C J M T for Shanks for the angst alphabet! thank you and sorry for the mistake! ❤️

Angst Alphabet - Shanks

a/n: hiii! Thank y’all for requesting! To the second anon, I went with Shanks (I hope that’s ok!!!) 💗💗💗

LOLOL THIS MY HUSBANDDDDD 💍😍

A-Accident (would they blame themselves if you died in an accident?)

It would depend on how much he felt he could have prevented it. However, Shanks understands all to well just how cruel the world can be. He can’t constantly be in control of everything, so although it would be devastating, he would have to realize that this is reality.

B-Break up (How would they break up with you?)

Shanks would use the excuse that he is a Yonko. He’s no good for you, and you deserve so much better than an infamous pirate who only brings danger. While these are just excuses - ways to make breaking up with you easier - he really would be speaking from the heart. Shanks has always felt this way but never voiced it, but now it’s finally time to let you go.

C-Crying (how would they make you cry?)

He leaves for long periods of time and refuses to you along. You know he’s only doing it for your safety, but it hurts that he doesn’t think you’re strong or responsible enough to join his crew on their voyages (note: he doesn’t actually think you’re not strong or responsible – his pirate life is just extremely dangerous, even as a yonko).

D-Death (how would they react to your death?)

He’s seen and experienced a lot of death in his life so he’d be a able to cope with it a little better than others would. Even so, your death would still be heart-breaking (he would mourn privately though). Now, if he literally saw you get killed in front of him then RIP to the person who killed you because they will be the one/s to die next.

E-Emotion (what is one emotion they would try to hide the most and how would they do it?)

Shanks is quite an open book. If he’s angry everyone knows. If he’s happy everyone knows (etc.). But, if I really had to pick one… I suppose it would be sadness or grief. He feels obligated to put on a front for his crew (although they can see right through it). He tends to let out his sadness and grief when he’s alone.

F-Fight (do you two ever fight? How big are the fights? What do you fight about? Etc.)

He tends to crack jokes before your fights can escalate into anything too serious. Sometimes it’s intentional, but other times it’s just his personality shining through. And rather than serious fights there’s just a lot of teasing and taunts between the two of you.

If you were to have a serious fight, it would be about both of your safety (As would most fights with any of the One Piece characters).

G-Guilt (what is the biggest thing they feel guilty about?)

More often than not, Shanks finds himself able let go of a LOT of shit. But the one thing he can’t seem to stop feeling guilty about is his failure to show up to Marineford on time. He knows he’s not directly responsible for Ace’s death, but that doesn’t stop the overwhelming guilt. If only he had gotten there a few minutes earlier.

H-Heartbreak (what would cause them pain in the relationship? How would they deal during a break-up?)

Coming back to you after each voyage is something he always looks forward to. However, that happiness is short-lived when he realizes he has to leave again in a few weeks. It’s always so painful having to say goodbye again.

I don’t think he would be too different during a break-up. Perhaps he may crack a few less jokes, but other than that, his personality and demeanour when around others remains the same. It isn’t until he’s alone that he lets his smile fall.

I-Injured (how would they react if you are badly injured?)

Undoubtedly, he’d be concerned, but he knows you’ll pull through (you have to pull through). So, after that initial concern has passed, he’ll be feeling all types of pissed off. Whoever, or whatever, injured you will pay – and honestly, he may not even deal the perpetrator himself (his crew is already on it - you are like family to them).

J-Jealousy (what do they do if they are jealous?)

I honestly think Shanks is just the type of person to just tell you if he’s jealous. But he wouldn’t say “uhh I’m feeling a little jealous” or anything along those lines – no. Instead, Shanks puts on a little pout and does a massive fake sigh until you finally ask him what’s wrong. That’s when he hits you with the “I guess my attention just isn’t enough for you”, and you’re like “HUH?? MF WHAT?” He’s literally such a child HAHA.

But, if there’s one particular person he really does not like you being around and they won’t leave you alone, then he is not at all opposed to just shoving his tongue down your throat right in front of them. That’ll definitely get the message across.

K-Kill (would they kill for revenge?)

Shanks may be a goofy and laid-back individual, but he will resort to violence if the situation calls for it. So, it is very likely that Shanks would kill for revenge. Maybe he wouldn’t necessarily do it himself. But, if he orders it, it’ll definitely happen.

L-Loss (what is their greatest loss?)

Gol D. Roger’s death was probably one of the greatest losses in Shanks’ life. Roger is the reason Shanks is a pirate today, and young shanks was absolutely broken by his death.

(hard to write much for this one seeing as shanks’ character is still quite a mystery to us!)

M-Mistake (what is the worst mistake they ever made with you?)

One time he completely forgot a date night that you spent SO LONG planning. It wasn’t just any date night either. It was a date you planned on his final night before him and his crew had to leave again for a while. You spent hours waiting for to show up, but he was nowhere to be seen. Finally, he showed up at your place, breath reeking of booze. You just looked at him and it hit him (he was like “OH SHIT”). He started apologizing profusely. He didn’t try to make any excuses, he completely owned up to being a shitty boyfriend. But, the moment he knew he had well and truly fucked up was when you just nodded and waved good night to him, wishing him safe travels – you didn’t cry, get visibly angry you just left alone. Shanks knew that was far worse than any yelling.

N-Nightmares (how often do they have them? What are they about? How do they deal with it?)

I literally am not joking when I say this but I think Shanks practically drinks till he passes out so even if he were to get nightmares he wouldn’t wake up LMAOOOOOOOOOOOO (ok maybe I am joking with this one but also kind of not).

In all seriousness though, I don’t think Shanks has nightmares very frequently. It’s gotten to the point where any fear or things of that matter that could be nightmares for him, have become so common in his life that he almost finds it not frightening to think about.

O-Outrage (how and why would they get mad at you?)

He would get mad at you for placing yourself in unnecessary danger. He’d call you stupid and irresponsible, even though he doesn’t really mean any of those things – it’s just the image of him potentially losing you forever is replaying in his mind and it absolutely terrifies him.

P-Past (what has happened in your relationship that changed the way you saw each other?)

You saw him get serious serious once before. Like the kind of serious where he uses his conquerors haki and everything. It definitely caused a bit of a change in your relationship as it was terrifying to witness. You’ve always known Shanks was strong and intimidating when needed, but that moment really showed you what it meant when people called him an “emperor of the sea”.

Q-Quality (what is their most dangerous/toxic quality?)

Not wanting to openly express his sadness and grief in front of others can be a very unhealthy quality. Shanks doesn’t allow himself good enough opportunities to express him emotions in a safe and healthy manner.

R-Rejection (how would they react to you rejecting their confession (or the other way around))

(First of all WHY WOULD ANYONE WANT TO REJECT SHANKS ANYWAY LIKE HUBBA HUBBA I LOVE HIM ANYWHOOOOOOOOO…..) Shanks is the type to just shrug it off. He’d be a little disappointed, bc c’mon the hottest most amazing person he’s ever known just turned him down! But he knows not everything in life goes how you want it to. Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose, and this just happens to be one of the things he’s lost. So ultimately, he’ll just shrug it off. (he will definitely get teased by his crew though).

S-Scars (battle or self-inflicted)

Shanks has no self-inflicted wounds. But he does have a scar across his left eye given to him by Blackbeard. He also has a missing arm which he (heroically) sacrificed as he saved lil Luffys life (does a missing arm even count as a scar?)

T-Trust (have they ever broken your trust?)

He’s never given you any reason to not trust him. He’s always open and honest with you. Well, as honest as he can be without placing you in any danger. Trust was something needed from the get-go of your relationship because he would be gone for long periods of time. The two of you wouldn’t be able to last without trust.

Oh, also if shanks ever did do anything to break your trust you best believe his crew will beat his ass (especially Benn). You’re family to them.

U-Urge (how badly do they want to see you after you guys separated?)

My god does he want to see you. He would give his other arm just to be right by your side in an instant. He’s gone for weeks, sometimes months, at a time. Shanks loves his crew, they’re a lively bunch and he trusts them with his life, and vice versa. But they’re not you. They don’t provide him with that same feeling of home that you do. Sure, this could be fixed if he let you join the crew on their journeys, but he absolutely cannot place you in that kind of danger. You’re already in enough danger as it is simply being in a relationship with him.

V-Vicious (what do they do when they lash out on you?)

Rather than lashing out at you, Shanks tends to give you the silent treatment. He looks at you without a word and just turns away. He does this in an attempt to make you feel guilty and as if everything is your fault.

W-Weak (what makes them feel weak how do they try to avoid it?)

There isn’t much that makes Shanks feel weak. But, being unable to be near his s/o is one of the few things that does make him feel weak. It’s a constant struggle between wanting to have them around him constantly, but also not wanting to place them in any danger. Ultimately, he decides that not placing them in danger is the better choice, despite how much it pains him.

X-X-ray (what do they hate and show it most obviously?)

Shanks can handle being picked on and ridiculed himself, but he will not tolerate that sort of behaviour towards his friends. The second someone goes after a friend (or someone else he cares about) they are done for.

Y-Yearn (what is one thing that they want but can’t have?)

LMFAOOOOOO WHY DID MY BRAIN AUTOMATICALLY THINK “his arm back” OOP-

I’M SORRY BUT I LITERALLY CAN’T THINK OF ANYTHING ELSE OTHER THAN HIS ARM HAHAHAHAHAH

Z-Zero (what do they do/say in your dying moments?)

He’d try to crack a few jokes to at least help you feel better. Other than that, he just tries to make the most of your final moments together.

#one piece #one piece x reader #one piece headcanons #one piece imagines #red haired shanks #shanks #shanks x reader #angst alphabet #one piece alphabet

[ahkaahshi]

how to earn their trust [scenarios]

pairings: miya atsumu; sakusa kiyoomi; akaashi keiji x fem reader

genre: fluff

warning(s): n/a

to earn miya atsumu’s trust, SHOW UP FOR HIM

Atsumu is an incredibly devoted guy who will never make you question his love for you. While he’s known by his brother and a few others close to him for being a liar and has a bad reputation for being selfish, he cares much more about people he’s close to than he lets on. He’ll never let you or his teammates down and, because of this, he needs a s/o who will be there for him, too.

When he asks you to come to his games, it often comes off in a facetious way, since he’s a total showboat and has an air of haughtiness to him. But, in actuality, he craves your support and seriously wants you there because volleyball means a lot to him, and so do you.

Just knowing that you’re there, watching him and cheering for him, gives him a sense of peace and calmness that’s important when he’s playing, since volleyball is such a fast-paced game that makes it nearly impossible for players to have a chance to slow down. Since he shows up for you, he wants you to do the same, which is completely fair.

If you have plans, he’s totally okay with it. You’re a busy student with a lot of stuff on your plate and a life of your own, so if you can’t come due to prior commitments, let him know and he’ll understand. Of course, he’ll tease and whine about it, but that’s just his way of being goofy with you because he knows he’ll be seriously missin’ you.

“Hey, ya comin’ to watch my game on Friday, (f/n)?” he asks, his honey-colored eyes full of hope.

Your heart sinks into your stomach as you answer, “I’m sorry, I’m tutoring all day after school and it’s really important for me to get some extra money, ‘Tsumu.”

Dejection flashes across his face, but he’s quick to hide his disappointment out of fear of upsetting you and out of his own pride. When he notices the creases of worry appear in your forehead from your furrowed brows, he’s quick to throw his arm around your shoulders and announce jokingly, “Ah, ditchin’ me again? I get it! If you don’t wanna spend time with me, jus’ say so ‘n I'll stop invitin’ ya to do fun things, like watch a kick-ass game of volleyball!”

Though he purposely made his comment loud enough for everyone in the gym to hear, his teammates didn’t bother with him, and, instead, continued putting all the equipment away. In spite of this, your face still burned with embarrassment at being teased, making you give Atsumu’s toned chest a light smack.

“I’m jus’ kiddin’! C’mere,” he reassures you, pulling you into a sweaty hug that you initially resist before placing your hands on the back of his soaked t-shirt and reciprocating his sign of affection. “Do whatcha gotta do, smartypants. I’ll see ya at next week’s game, though, right?”

“Of course.”

His grip around you tightens and he nestles his head in the crook of your neck. You can feel him grinning against your skin as he says, “Great! Wear that warm-up sweater of mine you’ve been holdin’ onto, why don’tcha? Looks good on ya.”

However, if you constantly flake on him or keep making excuses not to hang out with him or go to his games, he’ll quickly become disillusioned with you. Your lack of interest that’s apparent to him in the way you always think up reasons not to support or spend time with him will break his heart. As a result, he’ll stop asking you altogether, and his lack of trust in you will surely put your relationship on the rocks. He’s busy but always wants to make time for you, so if you can’t do the same for him, he’s ending the relationship.

to earn sakusa kiyoomi’s trust, RESPECT HIS BOUNDARIES

As we’ve seen, Omi doesn’t like crowds or germs, and, thus, is very strict and serious about the boundaries he sets. Because of this, it is crucial for his s/o to respect his limits and be aware of them. For him, this not only shows that you’re patient, but it also shows that you care deeply about him, which, in turn, will foster a relationship of trust between the two of you.

If he says he’s uncomfortable with doing something or going somewhere, don’t push him; especially early on in your relationship. If he needs space, let him have his space. He’ll come to you when he’s ready. It’s important to know that even if he doesn’t let you into his bubble right away or turns down your signs of affection because he’s worried about germs, he still cares about you. He’s just a bit anxious.

To build his trust, you'll have to work in a gradual manner towards pushing his boundaries and showing him that it’s okay for him to step a bit outside of his comfort zone. If you’re more excitable, touchy, or clingy, you can still be yourself, but you will need to slow down a bit for him. He needs time and love to get comfortable, so patience and commitment to him are important.

He will fall for you so hard if you show him that you want him to feel safe. Examples of this may be wearing the face mask he bought for you when you’re out in public together, bringing extra hand sanitizer or disinfecting wipes on dates for the two of you to use, or changing your bedsheets before he comes over. If you accommodate him, he will 100% do the same for you to make you feel safe and secure.

After you open the front door of your house for him, Sakusa shuffles out of the coldness of the brisk evening air and slides off his shoes. When he looks down at his sneakers sitting amongst the rest of your family’s shoes, he realizes that there’s an extra pair of slippers sitting along with the rest that are considerably larger and differently colored.

“Oh, Kiyo!” you pipe up when you see his charcoal gaze fixate on them, “I got you some slippers of your own since you come over so often! Everyone knows they’re yours so they haven’t been used, or anything.”

Though you can’t see it because he’s still wearing his mask, his lips curl up into the smallest of smiles. When he slides it off, he presses a gentle kiss against your forehead as thanks for the house shoes he slides his feet into before making his way to the kitchen to wash his hands. Once he's finished, you lead him into your room so he can set down his duffel bag and the two of you can settle in for a Netflix marathon, as promised.

Upon entering your room, his olfactory senses are delighted by the clean scent of fresh laundry, which he soon realizes is wafting from your bed. The look of contentment on his face as he takes a deep inhale makes you smile.

“Since you’re staying over, I washed everything,” you announce, “And, also, you left your shirt here by accident yesterday, so I washed that too.” His eyes follow where your finger points to his warm-up shirt laid on the edge of the comforter, neatly folded by your careful hands.

Wordlessly, he makes his way over to you and wraps his arms around you, pulling your body flush against his. With his head hanging by the side of yours, he can smell the shampoo you used on your slightly damp, (h/c) hair. “Thank you,” he murmurs before moving his face down towards yours so he can give you an appreciative kiss.

When you release one another, he rifles through his duffel bag to retrieve a bag of your favorite sweets that he then plops into your hands.

“I stopped by the store on the way to get you some, since you wouldn’t stop complaining about badly you wanted them yesterday.” Turning his gaze to the laptop on your bed, he adds, “We can watch whatever you want.”

“Really?!” you bubble, eyes glowing with excitement, since he always put up a fight about your choice of movie or television show.

He furrows his dark eyebrows at you, making the two distinctive moles above one of them twitch. “Yes. Don’t make me regret this.”

He will not tolerate a s/o who chastises or berates his habits, since they’re ways he creates feelings of security and peace of mind for himself. If you insist on constantly pushing his boundaries, or forcing him to do anything before he’s ready, he’ll ultimately pull away from you. At the end of the day, if he thinks you don’t have much consideration for him and how he feels, he will end the relationship since mutual respect is important to him.

to earn akaashi keiji’s trust, BE YOURSELF AND BE HONEST

Akaashi is the king of delivering the truth, albeit bluntly--but knows how to exercise tact. Because of his commitment to being straightforward and unapologetically Akaashi so that everyone around him can also be themselves, he wants a s/o who will be real with him.

If he does something you don’t like, tell him! If you want to watch a different movie than the one he put on, tell him! If you don’t want Bokuto crashing your date with him for the ten millionth time, tell him. Even if you’re worried about upsetting him! He can handle the truth and will work to remedy the situation, but he won’t stand for lies and dishonesty. Also, if you’re not comfortable with talking about something, just let him know and he’ll be respectful of your wishes.

No matter what you think of yourself, just be you. While he’s attracted to looks, of course, he’s also a huge personality guy. Therefore, he really appreciates people who are just themselves and don’t try to change for the sake of others. I mean, look at how much he loves and trusts Bokuto, and what does that mf do? Be himself!

Akaashi wants to love you for who you are, so let him!

“Hey, Keiji?”

“Yeah?”

You bite your lower lip with hesitation as your (e/c) eyes travel up and down your form in the mirror resting against the wall in your bedroom. The dress you’re wearing is one your doting boyfriend diligently selected for you, but it just doesn’t quite suit you--in terms of both style and fit. “Uh...” you mumble shakily, trying to find a way to reject his gift without being harsh, “this dress is really nice...”

"I sense a but coming,” Akaashi responds, his voice muffled by the door separating the two of you.

You sigh, “But, it’s not really me and it doesn’t really fit that great. I'm sorry. I know you went out of your way to get this for me.”

After opening the door for him so he can inspect how his gift looks on you for himself, he purses his lips before they form a gentle smile. “It’s okay,” he assures you, taking one of your hands in his and meeting your gaze with his gunmetal blue one, “Thanks for being honest with me. I still have the receipt, so I can return it.”

Giving his hand a light squeeze, you reiterate, “I’m sorry.”

He shakes his head at you and plants a kiss against your temple, filling your body with warmth. “Don’t be. If anything, I should be the one apologizing for not getting your style or size right even after being with you for, what, three months now?”

His comment makes you giggle, and he relishes in the delightful sounds echoing from your mouth. As he tucks a stray strand of your (h/l), (h/c) hair behind your ear, he offers, “How about you come with me to the mall when I return it so you can help me pick something you actually like?”

A smile graces your lips that makes his heart skip a beat. “Thank you, baby.”

Since he values honesty and authenticity so much, he’ll lose his trust in a s/o who is a habitual liar or who constantly tries to change to fit in. He gets seriously irked by people who are fake, so if he sees you take on an entirely different persona just to gain the favor of other people, or treat him differently based on who you’re around, he’ll be very turned off. And don’t even think about lying to him. Little, white lies he can work with, but keeping secrets from him and not being straightforward with him will break his heart. He’s very forgiving, and will wrack his brain for reasons as to why his s/o might be lying to him, but if he draws a blank or if you cheat on him, he’s done.

#fran writes hq!! #haikyuu!! #pls be nice to tsumu #he is such a sweet boy #can y'all tell I love sakusa lol #I just feel like omi is soft deep down inside okay #I simped whilst writing LMAO #haikyuu #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu scenarios #miya atsumu #sakusa kiyoomi #akaashi keiji #miya atsumu x reader #sakusa kiyoomi x reader #akaashi keiji x reader #atsumu x reader #sakusa x reader #akaashi x reader #cute #fluff #manga #anime #hq!! #x reader #reader insert

[call-me-apple]

Masterpost of Posts

Analyses:

Dream Dream wasn't made the villain, he utilized the image that was given to him Dream fears that being seen as fallible will make his allies abandon himAn analysis of the "Vassal" conversation between Dream and Wilbur Dream's "god complex" was an attempt to assure his survival Dream's motivation behind ExileDream never cut his attachmentWhy Dream felt the need to declare war on L'Manburg Why Dream didn't go against the Badlands Dream went on strike because of Ranboo "c!Dream is a fraud" Wilbur Wilbur and his connection to Dream in Season 3Wilbur hates himself for creating L'Manburg Wilbur doesn't think he can be loved without putting up a facade What Wilbur's "Eternal Limbo" is Why I am sceptical of Wilbur's attempts at redemption I don't hate c!Wilbur as much as I am TERRIFIED of him Wilbur viewed L'Manburg as his property The Syndicate Philza wasn't an outsider to New L'Manburg Philza is blinded by his love for Wilbur Ranboo won't hold the Red Festival execution against Techno Random Dream & Sam: two flawed moral frameworks clashing An analysis of George cc!Ranboo aims to rebrand c!Dream character through his own storyline The L'Manburg revolutionary war is kind of ridiculous The fandom approaches the story incorrectly

Rambles:

The Community House is a perfect example of where c!Dream is wrong What c!Dream is fighting for The narrative frames the Syndicate as the ones in the right On why Exile Arc is my least favorite arc The c!rivaldsuo dynamic Why I like c!Dream Why I like c!Technoblade Violence is the only way c!Techno can make himself heard c!Wilbur is c!Philza's only son just accept it already I love "This Kingdom is Mine"

You are not immune (L'Manburg critical):

L'Manburg was never a democracy L'Manburg was created for power, as said by cc!Wilbur c!Wilbur was xenophobic, said by the character himself "Words not weapons" was a way to get people's guards down and then stab them in the back L'Manburg weren't pacifist "L'Manburg made its occupants better people" Well, actually... (not my post) Wilbur lied to get people on his side

Funnies:

c!Dream on Wilbur's D&D alignment chart c!Dream is a c!George simp What necromancy does to a mf If Wilbur Soot knew of my vendetta against his character he'd only appreciate it c!Ranboo would write banger character analysis The duality of Wilbur Soot How the Dream Team break-up on the SMP happened c!Wilbur is a c!Dream stan Everyone in MCYTblr is constantly pointing guns at each other Parallel universe cc!Wilbur would've written c!Quackbur shipfic

Creative:

What It Means to Be Redeemed (c!Dream centric) My Way (c!Dream web weaving)

Edits:

That one time c!Ranboo fans mischaracterized their own fave c!Wilbur's worship of c!Dream isn't all that sudden Sad c!Dream edit Compilation of Revivedbur contradicting himself Dream is the villain in this story (old clip)

Favorite meta from others:

No, the Syndicate aren't tyrants Banger c!George analysis Ranboo was Dream's clock Evidence of endersmile being a positive relationship No, Dream didn't hurt every person on the server The Syndicate HAS lost An analysis of Season 1 c!Technoblade c!beeduo is 🌟unhealthy🌟 c!Tommy isn't a good person

Random posts:

The symbolism behind the L'Manburg flag (Wilbur's Reddit post) That one time I got 2 CC notices on Tumblr Wilbur talking about the Dream SMP (recap)

[captainshazamerica]

If this Bruce doesn't adopt Tim I will! But I'm kinda scared for Tim I mean he's either gonna end up with Buce or the titans at some point, im afraid that something terrible is gonna happen his family and then titans/bruce takes him in? That boy loves batman and robin so much like even his family seeing the news knew how much it would upset him although I will say that for the brain that kid has he makes some pretty stupid decisions, hes driving around GOTHAM plastered in the bat-symbol that's not a good idea! the amount of lunatics that roam free in Gotham (and possibly have escaped from arkham) and hate the bat and hes driving around with the bat symbol on him KID be careful!

Some kind of Anti-fear toxin does seem more accurate cuz he's clearly taking something to not be afraid. Maybe it's something he found in Gotham and decided to try it and got addicted so he's using that lab place to try recreate it? and maybe he can't recreate it perfectly cuz in the crowbarring scene he seemed kinda anxious about his surroundings and he'd just taken that inhaler thing to overcome fear so I dunno?? Or maybe he went to arkham to see Crane for some reason and Crane has orchestrated the whole thing and told him about the drug but then wouldn't Crane have to know everyone's identity then? Dude I dunno I need more episodes even tho the low quality glitchyness is painful lol

There's probably an abundance of rooms to choose from at Wayne manor yet Jason takes Dicks old room and keeps the flying graysons posters up! I like to think that he does view dick as an older brother and just took his room to kind of have a connection to him and that he admires him hence the graysons posters being left up, yooo dick calling him his brother! I really want a nice family reunion with dick jason and bruce 💕

Babs was too mean to bruce when she went off like I get where she's coming from but yo lady his son just died dial it down like a notch yikes but also babs being like 'i wonder how long it'll take for bruce to replace jason and dick is all 'what no the last thing bruce is gonna do is rope another kid into this mess'. Cut to scene of Bruces potential robin folder 😅 but I also like that dick was trying to be considerate and compose himself for bruce but once he found out that bruce is idiot enough to pull another kid into this, that that's when he got mad and bruce so brokenly begging dick to come back and be robin 😢😢😢

I know the show is constantly trying to push bruce out/sideline him cuz it's a titans show not a bruce wayne show and I know they're going for a different portrayal of bruce which I'm not complaining about I do like this version of bruce (more than I thought actually) and this universe but I feel like they could have gave more cracks you know, I like that they showed him trying to avoid the reality of jasons death and just not stopping not even for a second and just immediately jump into another case and that breakdown verge where he's begging dick to be robin and then when he finally I guess let's the weight of jasons loss sit on him to the point where he whacks in jokers head with a crowbar just like he killed jason (he could have killed joker so many other ways like a less violent bullet to the head but oh no brucey crowbars him to death!!)

There's a lot of character stuff that i do like but that scene where he's in the cave on his knees scrubbing his sons blood out of the suit he died in, the suit that he only ever wore because of batman. 😢 I feel like they could have had him crack there and let out a gut wrenching scream and then just continue on doing what he was doing as if nothing happened and dick walking in on that should have had more of a reaction!? like he could have stopped in his tracks at the sight of his brothers blood all over his father and bruce screaming, dick could have like took a step back almost like he's gonna run but forces himself to stay there, because who wouldn't want to run from that and no matter how much horrible things you've dealt with before sometimes your brain does just take over against your will and makes you react, the rest of the scene just could have played out the way it did. Literally one ounce more emotion is all I wanted.

No one really emotionally cracked at jasons death. I get that it just happened and that people put walls up and denial can be such a prominent thing when a loved one dies but it couldn't have been that difficult to put in little mannerisms now and again to show that everyone is deeply hurt but holding it in. Honestly gar seemed more hurt to me than dick did. But I do like that dick reacted in detective mode and started trying to figure things out from jasons side so at least there's that.

This redhood is defo not an anti hero he has well and truly landslided into villian territory and I dunno how that's gonna be reconciled? they better not kill him off! and they better not just straight up keep redhood/jason as a full on villian! but if they do get through to jason and bring him back a little how the heck is that little man gonna deal with what he did to Hank?? I feel like they had a bond you know and for all Hanks talk about putting Jason down I really don't think that Hank would actually have killed him even if it came down to Hanks life vs Jasons I think Hank would rather die than kill Jason (but that's heavily biased cuz in my mind jason is my son and I freaking love hank sooo) but Hank to me puts on a hard front like 'yeah I'll get in your face I'll come at you b*tch' but internally he's like 'yeah I'll come at you to help you' 😅 like internally he defo has a lot of soft spots though that's not to say he'd be like this for someone like the joker or scarecrow or whatever guys like that he'd be like no screw you you die or go to arkham like byeee

Nevermind how jason is gonna come back from this though HOW IN THE ACTUAL SH*T is dawn gonna come back from this!!?!!

Random side note here but imagine Jasons first time in the batcave he would be so excited and trying to mess with everything and being like ohh what's that do and pressing random buttons and bruce having a hernia trying to get jason to stop before he accidentally blows the cave up 😅 also he has probably been caught several times trying to 'borrow' the batmobile, I can just picture him trying to sneak down the halls of the manor without the floor creaking and making it all the way into the cave and doing a victory dance cuz he didn't get caught and he hops on into the batmobile in his pj's and let's out a scream cuz alfred is sitting in the freakin passenger seat waiting for him and then they just hang out in the batmobile alfred had the good foresight to bring a flask of tea books and a blanket for jason

Speaking of Alfred I think it would have been more angsty and hurtful if Alfred died shortly after Jason and after a few days Jason claws his way out his grave and the first thing he sees is Alfreds headstone and that's how he finds out Alfred died : (((

This is so long girl I'm sorry I know it doesn't seem like it but I did restrain myself 😅 one more thing before I go maybe this Dick is the absolute worst mf and the reason babs feels betrayed by him and is so upset with him could be that he left her (or cheated on her) with Dawn cuz of that weird flashback thingy in the other season where dick dawn was a thing I dunno I hope not though that would be ughhh

Oh crap, you right about probably something bad will happen to Tim for Bruce or Titans to take him in, I was gonna say he could just demand to be in their lives to save Bruce/Dick like in the comics but he also has kinda shitty parents normally and these people seem cool so really it could go either direction, but like it’s Titans so it doesn’t look good lol. Also, I wonder if it’s gonna be Dick who is basically gonna adopt him this time since we already had a huge track record in just 2 seasons lmao. But I know right, true I like how his parents knew immediately how much the news would effect him 😭 I hope he goes down the making himself robin and forcing himself in Dick and Bruce’s life xD I love that route. Lmao, the kid is all book smart, very little street smart when it doesn’t have to do with outsmarting someone XD

I was also rewatching and that gas he takes def has to be some anti fear toxin cause he mentions fear so many times and flash backed to his near death fall, which he felt was probably holding him and back and thus had to prove himself and adds to whatever is influencing him. But ohhh he did seem pretty dang anxious at the carnival grounds, that’s a really interesting theory but recreating something he found hmm, I can see that.

Apparently according to a YouTube who got to see the first 5 episodes, we find out what his deal is a lot more in episode 5, so one more week hopefully

Brooo trueee, I couldn’t believe jason took dick’s room and like didn’t even change anything. Like Jason looks or at least use to look up to Dick SO much, like in his first episode in the first season, he went on quite a lot about how much he had always wanted to meet him and how much he looked up to him, which is probably also fueling his red hood rage, being hurt by your idol and brother like he did in S2 must have really just killed the boy. But yes omg, there freaking better be a dang family reunion scene like, after so much angst we deserve that 😭

And yesss, I loved seeing how mature Dick is getting and just how much he is growing as a character, the fact he was so calm and considerate with Bruce at first really shows that compared to s1 Dick, only breaking when Bruce tried to get more kids involved. That scene by Brenton was sooo well acted omg, the way he yelled that he doesn’t want to robin again, heartbreaking man. And Bruce begging like that omg

Yeah, this version of Bruce is def so different than any Bruce we have seen on screen before, like def the most emotionally constipated, and that’s saying something xD But I like how they are taking a risk, it also helps Dick’s character more and give him more of an arc, as he seems to be taking on Bruce’s normal role with Jason and red hood. Bro, you are so right omg, like the fact Bruce could have killed the joker in any way and he does it with the dang crowbar. It really shows how broken he really was and why the man shouldn’t depressing any and every damn feeling and emotion lol.

Omg, I love how you have the exact details of what you wanted to happen in that one Bruce and Dick scene 😂👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 bro if you dont already you should totally write fanfics cause that was so detailed, I love it

Yeah, I do wish someone cracked (other than Bruce lmao) a bit more, but I do think each character reacted in character though, like it is very Dick(at least this version of Dick, other versions may break down tbh) to put everything into solving the case and figuring out what was up, that’s more this version’s way of caring than just breaking down, like he rarely ever has broken down completely. I think dawn could have been a little more emotional about the death (tho she has enough coming for her lmao). Connor didn’t know Jason that well so it makes sense he would just be sad. Gar seemed pretty sad and in character about it, maybe could have had a bit more, same with Kori, tho she showed it by being almost angry and fiercely protective of everyone else, so I think that makes sense for her. It would have been interesting to see how Rachel and Rose would have reacted though (where did rose go btw?! She would so have a reaction to Jason’s death). But yeah, i wish there was more resolution and break downs for Jason, but also it may have just not felt real since they weren’t there? But I agree

You think? Idk, I think they could def still make him an anti hero towards the end, especially if it’s crane behind the whole thing. Cause if they don’t they are gonna have to go down the gosh awful overused villain gets redeemed while he dies/only to die right freaking after , and I will be so freaking livid if they do that omg. Like they better freaking not. But true, he would be broken by what he did to Hank, oh yikes. But I can see him then that leading to the anti hero path, like he would never go back to be on the titans cause he would feel too guilty, thus giving more of a reason for the anti hero life. But I know, I loved Jason and Hank’s love hate relationship 😭😭😭😭 You know Hank secretly loved the kid and probably saw himself in him.

Yikes poor dawn, you right. Like I have no idea how she is gonna be now like wow.

OMG GIRL, You are on a hc angst train today!!!! That scenario of Alfred dying right after jason and Jason climbing out to see Alfred’s?! Heartbreaking!

But I can’t believe they killed Alfred off so casually tho😭

Omg I swear if they freaking show Dick having cheated on Babs I will be so freaking pissed omg, he better have not! Im hoping they had a more high school romance thing/grew up together then got together type of thing

And omg don’t apologize I LOVED IT and reading your asks!!! I feel ya too!

#batanon #titans #titans spoilers #Titans S3 #titans season 3 #Titans speculation #speculation #ask #Meredith gets an ask #Jason Todd #dick Grayson #Meredith thoughts

[wetalkinboutbooks]

Deathless Divide by Justina Ireland

Summary:  The sequel to Dread Nation is a journey of revenge and salvation across a divided America.

After the fall of Summerland, Jane McKeene hoped her life would get simpler: Get out of town, stay alive, and head west to California to find her mother.

But nothing is easy when you're a girl trained in putting down the restless dead, and a devastating loss on the road to a protected village called Nicodemus has Jane questioning everything she thought she knew about surviving in 1880's America.

What's more, this safe haven is not what it appears - as Jane discovers when she sees familiar faces from Summerland amid this new society. Caught between mysteries and lies, the undead, and her own inner demons, Jane soon finds herself on a dark path of blood and violence that threatens to consume her.

But she won't be in it alone.

Katherine Deveraux never expected to be allied with Jane McKeene. But after the hell she has endured, she knows friends are hard to come by - and that Jane needs her, too, whether Jane wants to admit it or not.

Watching Jane's back, however, is more than she bargained for, and when they both reach a breaking point, it's up to Katherine to keep hope alive - even as she begins to fear that there is no happily-ever-after for girls like her (Taken from Goodreads)

Our Ratings:  

 → Geena:  ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

 → Kae: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ x1000

Overall: A killer sequel to Dread Nation, you’re constantly on the edge of your seat and each chapter is a new layer of stress. There’s never a moment of rest and repose because Justina Ireland hooks you with the first chapter and doesn’t let go until you’ve turned the last page.

~ Check out the spoiler-full review/plot discussion below!

The Bad: 

→ Redjack and Redfern

Geena: We’re starting with the bad because as Kae said ‘So much bad happens before the good’ and that’s the best way to describe this book. Let’s start off with our fave rogue from Dread Nation who turns out to be a WHOLE BITCH!!! Once Jane and Katherine and Co. get out of Summerland and meet up with him to plan their next move, Jane and them want to go to Nicodemus (a safe town run by a black man and a council of freed slaves and indigenous ppl). Redjack is like ‘it’s an overpopulated place let’s not’ but Jane isn’t dumb and sniffs out that there’s something else, and after Katherine and Jane both needle him we find out that… THIS BITCH IS MARRIED… AND HAS BEEN FOR A WHILE?????? ALL THE WHILE HE WAS FLIRTING AND MACKING ON JANE HE WAS MARRIED????????????? This is the start of the downfall of men in this book, it only gets worse from here… Jane confronts him about being played and he’s basically like ‘Jane you’re fun and all but like you’d never settle down, I seen you fighting and stuff just because you want to… I need a home for Lily’... and like… ok.... Jane is immediately like ‘He wanted a doormat’ and I DIED… but karma works fast and he gets bit by a shambler literally the same night lmao… and guess who kills him? JANE.. though it’s quite emotional because she had feelings for him. 

Jane also steals one of his letters when she kills him and kjnsfdskj we find out his wife is preggers but who’s gonna tell her that Redjack is capital d DEAD...  

Kae: Alright. MF’n REDJACK. This man… With his cute ass… He was just TRASH. A real fuckboy and Geena summed him up perfectly. I was like, a lil sad to see him go? But good riddance to him for playing my Janey Jane. She may be a tough-ass, but she absolutely has feelings (THAT SHE DOESN’T KNOW HOW TO COPE WITH) but still. She has feelings. 

So now, let’s talk about Redfern’s shady ass. I’ve always side-eyed Redfern. I didn’t trust him. I had a very hard time trusting him because how you gone help The White Man ™  help enslave black and other indigenous peoples for your own gain? Like, boy fuck you. Shady ass. He’s the one that transported Jane, Katherine, and Red Jack to Summerland in the first place. So it was definitely a shock to see his fool ass in Nicodemus as the damn SHERIFF. LIKE WHO TF?

Geena: RIGHT I WAS LIKE WHY IS HE EVERYWHERE? IS HE CLONING HIMSELF??

Kae: And like, he jails Jane because when her and the gang arrive, the surviving folks of Summerland blame her for the small settlement falling to the dead. Redfern is like “Look, Jane. I know you ain’t do that shit. But I gotta jail you so they can stfu. You’ll get a fair trial.” And Jane doesn’t trust this and neither do I. Because black people didn’t get a fair ANYTHING back then. (We still don't) BUT THAT’S ANOTHER STORY. ANYWAAAAAAAY. Jane catches Redfern shooting the breeze with Miss Duncan and they eventually set her free. All the while, Katherine, a few homies they met in Summerland, and a few homies from Miss Prestons, are planning to break Jane out and BOUNCE. When Jane and Katherine finally reunite, Katherine is like “JANE. MY BESTIE. I WAS WORRIED ABOUT YOU!” And Jane is like “Lol, yikes. We’re not even friends wtf?” Because again, Jane can’t handle feelings or people genuinely caring about her. That has a bit to do with mommy issues. NOW.  Jane has been trying to tell the council of Nicodemus that the horde of zombies will break down the wall that protects the city. But they’re like “HURR DURR SHUT UUUUP. We have machine guns. And that Gideon scientist boy has been keeping up gucci.” And Jane knows walls don’t hold forever. So she’s like we need to get TF up out of here. So she starts making a plan… And that’s when shit starts going south.

Geena: Like Kae said, Redfern is a traitor in all sense of the word… The only time he seems normal is when he’s hardcore crushing on Miss Duncan, but even then… He ends up telling Jane that he only cares about self-preservation and that’s why he’ll stab even his own mother in the back if it means he’ll be safe… OKAY HE DOESN’T SAY THAT BUT REDFERN 100% WOULD… Well kARMA GOT IT’S KISS FOR REDFERN TOO bc when Nicodemus falls, Miss Duncan also turns shambler so kjndsfkjsdfnsd

He ends up being a double agent near the end of the book, pretending to be Jane and Katherine’s ally, only to turn them over to the VILLAIN.. But then also helps them escape? A very morally questionable character and also another example of Deathless Divide saying ‘men aint shit’.

Kae: He triple crossed their asses. Triple agent mf 

→ The Fall of Nicodemus 

Kae: WHEWWWW. The fall of Nicodemus was something else. I knew it was going to happen, but damn, it was bad. So, we have bitchboy Gideon, who Jane has taken a bit of a liking to. And he wants her to convince the rest of the town to get a ‘Shambler Vaccine’ to protect them. She refuses because she has no idea if the vaccine really works. At least, not yet she does. So at some point, Gideon convinces all the people of Nicodemus to get vaccinated. But he vaccinates all of the original inhabitants of Nicodemus first, then the assholes from Summerland. But the thing is, he runs out of vaccines by the time he has to vaccinate the Summerland folk, and they’re being PISSY about it like “waaaaa, you vaccinated all the black folks before us, WAAA IM A FUCKIN BABY” so he hurries and makes a quick vaccine. Well, THIS QUICK BATCH TURNS THE FOLKS OF SUMMERLAND INTO ZOMBIES. THIS DUMBASS BITCHASS GIDEON TURNS THE DAMN PEOPLE. So he and Miss Duncan stuff them all in a barn or whatever, then DESTROYYYYYY the fence/wall in the back of the town to try to lead them out. Redfern helps too, I think. And then shit. Gets. Real. The machine gun they had isn’t holding them off and some damn zombies done came around the back entrance they created by destroying the fence, and they start CHOMPIN. 

Geena: AS KAE SAID… GIDEON AND DUMBITCH CO. MADE A WHOLE BACKDOOR FOR THE ZOMBIES IN AN ATTEMPT TO COVER UP HIS OWN MISTAKE… Reading about the fall was really sad, because this group of well meaning people WHO BTW AREN’T WHITE, that established a community where black and indigenous folk can find SOME SEMBLANCE of justice is overrun by zombies bc of a bitchass white boy’s hubris. So, the zombies get through the backdoor and as Jane and Katherine are slicing and dicing they stumble onto the group they traveled with.. Who also turned.. And Jane has to kill that little baby boy because he too, got turned into a zombie… Also, during the fall of Nicodemus Jane gets bit :( and separates from Katherine and Co. to die alone at the sheriff’s office… But then she doesn't… because back in book 1 when Gideon gave her a vaccine… it worked. So, Jane wakes up to Gideon… the last person she wants to see… who is basically gloating about his vaccine working and he’s making excuses for himself? Callie (a new friend) tries to kill Gideon, but he escapes and she ends up helping Jane instead… where Jane loses her arm :( 

Literally, a White Man’s ego can destroy a whole town built on the blood and sweat of freed slaves and indigenous people, JUST BECAUSE he thinks he knows better… 

Kae: So like, when Jane wakes up, she threatens to kill Gideon, even though she’s sick and basically puking the zombie virus out of her. While Gideon is gloating, Callie (Jane’s friend and future girlfriend) shoots towards Gideon, but misses. She then cuts off Jane’s bitten arm. The two of them spend a bit of time in the fallen Nicodemus, looking at all of the zombiefied townspeople and healing so they can leave. They both want to track down Gideon and KILL HIS ASS. Which I support. And now we venture into PART 2 OF THE BOOK BAYBEEEEE. 

The Ugly

→ Gideon

Kae: WE’RE GOING TO OFFICIALLY TALK ABOUT BITCHASS, SKANK-ASS GIDEON. Dawg, when I tell you I HAAATED this man, I mean it. I have never wanted a character to die more than I wanted Gideon to parish. This man caused the fall of not one, but MULTIPLE TOWNS AND THE WHOLE DAMN CITY OF SAN FRANCISCO. 

After the fall of Nicodemus, Jane and Callie set out to track down Gideon. On their tracking adventures, Jane becomes a bounty hunter in order to make money so she can continue on her search for Gideon. Jane is like, a hundred times more badass now. She’s a one armed, zombie slaying, bounty hunter that kills people who have done immense wrong to others. She and Callie learn through their travels that Gideon escaped safely and went on to get funded by some rich folk. In Gideon’s own escapades, he has caused the fall of another small town. And guess how he did that? This IDIOT vaccinated another town and they all turned ‘Shambler’ (zombie). Then he fucks off and escapes so he can’t get in trouble. Jane and Callie make it to California, where Jane hopes to reunite with her mother. There, she kills a man, which pisses Callie off. So while they’re shacked up in a hotel, Callie leaves while Jane is sleeping. And Callie’s punk ass takes all of Jane’s money with her, leaving Jane without anything but the clothes on her back. 

Geena: We don’t stan Callie in this house. If she loved Jane that much she would’ve left her SOME money wtf

Kae: TRUE. SO FUCK, CALLIE. LIL BIIIEEETCH. But yeah, Callie dips tf out and leaves Jane with nothing. Callie DID give Jane the option to come with her and start a new life, but Jane is kind of being fueled by her revenge and it’s blinded her. I feel bad too because Jane is also being haunted by Redjack’s ghost. So there’s that. 

Geena: Gideon the perfect example why ~intellectual~ men don’t deserve ANY rights. He’s so obsessed with his own research and bullshit, he thinks that no one knows what’s best for humanity other than him, that he brings about death and destruction wherever he goes. He’s the reason Nicodemus falls, he’s also the reason that the West Coast (which is seen as shambler free because it’s protected by mountains) also falls… BECAUSE THIS BITCH CAUSES ANOTHER SHAMBLER OUTBREAK with a faulty vaccine. When Jane and Callie decided to hunt him down I was like LIVING!!! LIKE KILL THAT WHITE BOY!! Who cares for nothing other than being successful… Also, the fact that every boy Jane has thought to be cute was trash is killing me… Girl… needs better taste HONESTLY…

Also, while trying to make himself look like a Sad Boy he forcefully injects his vaccine into Katherine… WHICH ALMOST KILLS HER, but SIIIKKEE because Katherine ends up killing him instead 😎 I personally wanted his death to be WORSE and more PAINFUL for all the shit he’s done but Justina Ireland kept it SHORT and Sweet. 

The Good

→ Jane and Katherine

Geena: THE ONE… THE ONE GOOD THING THAT CAME OUT OF THIS DUOLOGY… JANE AND KATHERIN’S FRIENDSHIP… LITERAL RIDE OR DIES... BC JANE TECHNICALLY DIES AT ONE POINT LMAO

Like Kae mentioned earlier, Katherine has fully accepted Jane as a friend by the time they get to Nicodemus, but Jane is still unsure (kinda thinks she isn’t a friend type of person). Katherin reaffirms that she will be there for Jane, but Jane is like Sideyes… But, as the story progresses, after Jane “dies” Katherine spends the rest of the novel constantly thinking of Jane and wishing she had said more.  ALL THE WHILE JANE is killing her way to the West Coast.

When they do meet though it kinda hurt because Jane is essentially like ‘Sorry, the old Jane can’t come to the phone right now... because she’s dead’ and Katherine is like ?????????. Jane believes herself to be a monster, because um… she’s just been bounty hunting bad people and because she’s driven by her rage against Gideon - IMO I don’t think that would’ve made her heartless or a monster, but Callie reiterates that she doesn’t like Jane like that (as a killer)… obviously, her resolve was weaker than Jane’s but n e ways. Katherine is also like ‘omg Jane killed that dude without remorse’ (Jane kills a r*pist in front of her, but Katherine doesn’t know what he did). REGARDLESS, uNLIKE SOMEONE (Callie) Katherine doesn’t give up on Jane and accompanies her wherever Jane goes because she knows she can bring back the old Jane and… when I tell you a bitch was emotional :’) AND ALSO THE ENDING WAS BEAUTIFUL though bittersweet

Kae: Okay, let me just say, from the bottom of my heart, that I absolutely adore Jane and Katherine’s friendship. Jane thinks it was built on their shared experience of being kidnapped, but in reality, it was built on their respect for each other. When Kate first saw Jane, she was SHOOK. And Jane was like ‘oh fuck, be cool. Act like you don’t care.’ and so that happened, as Geena explained above. But Katherine stuck around because that’s her best friend and you never give up on your best friend when they’re going through something. 

Jane continues to be a meanass to Kate, but Katherine ignores it to the best of her ability and pulls her knickers up and keeps by Jane’s side. In this, Katherine notices that Jane calls her by her full name instead of just “Kate”, which was something Jane always did because she knew it annoyed Katherine. So when Jane starts to let down her guard, she slips up and calls her “Kate” and this takes Katherine to the moon! She’s so excited to see her Jane coming back! But Jane is like “whoops, I'm showing feelings. Can’t let that shit happen” and she hunkers back down. 

While Jane was off being dead and bounty hunting, Katherine was on a boat (but I don’t remember doing what) with Lily and Sue (Sue is from Miss Prestons and Nicodemus) and her new friend, a man named Carolina. When they get to California, they realize that it’s not as black friendly as they’d hoped, but it’s presumably safe so that’s what matters. Katherine here’s that San Francisco might offer them a better life, so she and her gang make the trip to get there. That’s when they run into Jane and all the above happens. 

One of my favourite parts is Carolina not liking Jane because his first introduction is killing a man without hesitation. But Katherine is like “Pfffft, oh that’s just Jane! It’s FINE!” all the while internally she’s like ‘omgomgomg wtf’. And that’s when Katherine agrees to help Jane kill Gidon and also find her mother. 

In the end, they kill Gideon’s horrible ass and end up finding Jane’s mother safe and sound in a small settlement in the mountains called New Haven. Jane’s mother is happy to see Jane, but is totally dismissive of Jane's experience and all she had to do to get to her mother again. I felt really bad for Jane because she did EVERYTHING to get back to her mother and her mom was a DICK. Anyway, Jane leaves with Redfern so they can find a new place (as reluctant homies, not as a couple) and Katherine is like “AYO, YOU JUST GONE LEAVE ME WITHOUT SAYING GOODBYE, BITCH? I SAID I’M YOUR BEST FRIEND SO WHERE WE GOIN!?” And then all three of them prance off into the sunset with a new goal of finding a better life and man, a bitch (aka me and Geena) were CRYIIIIING because it was so sweet and we just love two best friends who are down for one another.  

Geena: YEEEEEEESSSSSSS, the ending was bittersweet because like Kae mentioned, Jane had been searching for her mother and her Aunt Aggie hoping to find comfort in their arms. But.. when she got to New Haven, the old life she had been desperately longing for was no longer there. Aunt Aggie was dead and her mother had remarried, and like Kae said, she ignored everything Jane had been through- not wanting to share in her daughter’s sorrows. Jane quickly realized that this wasn’t the place for her, and up and leaves, and this is where the sweetness comes in because the whole scene of Katherine running after Jane 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 Like I had been so scared Justina Ireland wouldn’t give them a happy ending, because how can a zombie story end happily, but this was A LOT better than what I had expected… a bitch (Kae and I SDJKFNSD) teared up.. Just wanna thank Kae for hyping up this sequel before I read it because wow… IT REALLY LIVED UP TO THE HYPE 

Conclusion

Geena: Like I said before, this is one of the best sequels I’ve read. Usually, books end up falling flat when you get to the second but Justina Ireland didn’t fall into the same trap. We finally get Katherine’s POV and get to learn why she insists on wearing a corset, and that she’s not as perfect as Jane believed. There’s heart-stopping action and Jane kicking major ass and truly being The Devil’s Bride. Overall, once I finished this I was like Head Empty because I couldn’t read anything afterwards because I had to take time to digest the wild ride the book had been. Also, one of the biggest takeaways (other than ‘white ppl ain’t shit’) was ‘Men don’t deserve rights’ and honestly? Same.  

Kae: So there we have it! The story ended beautifully and I really, really enjoyed it. I still haven’t been able to read anything after finishing it because it was just THAT GOOD. It’s been about a month since I finished it and I’m still reeling from how beautifully written it was. It was really refreshing to read about two black women who had FEELINGS and were able to express them to the reader (because they had a hard time expressing them to each other lmao) and it was just really nice. Katherine’s backstory was great about how she was born in a brothel house and her mother tried to teach her that if she found the right man, she’d be fine. But Katherine didn’t want that. She wanted a life where she could provide for herself and be independent. What she brought with her from her old life was her corset and she wore because she basically felt it would hold her together and suppress her anxiety. 

Geena: Also, reading about the corset again can I say one of my fave details was Sue helping Katherine loosen it whenever they were in a fight… like the moment Jane disappeared Sue was there to help Katherine and support her …. Sue… the most underrated character AND THE FACT SHE GOT HER HAPPY ENDING MARRIED TO A MANS!!!!  

Kae: Jane learned, unfortunately, that not all things are golden. Her old life that she so desperately wanted a taste of, had gone sour. Her mother was no help to Jane and couldn’t even give her the smallest of sympathies. Those two things were initially what kept Jane going (along with her Aunt Aggie), until Gideon showed up and started doing dumb shit. What Jane also learned though, was that people do care about her and even though Katherine wasn’t blood, she was her family and truly loved Jane for who she was, flaws and all. 

It’s a beautiful story about two black women finding themselves and forming an unbreakable friendship. It’s more than fighting zombies and more than surviving. It’s about LIVING and finding a way to deal with all of the problems and anxieties they face along the way. It's a great story and I urge everyone to read it. Yes, it’s fictional history about zombies. BUT, it is very telling of the time period it takes place in and Justina didn’t sugar coat any of the prejudices Black people and Indigenous peoples went through back then and I appreciated that. Deathless Divide is beautiful and poetic and heartwarming in the best of way. <3 

#deathless divide #justina ireland #book review #bookreviews #blookblr #book blogging #book blogger #our reviews #bookish #bibliophile

[kazmorosov]

|| bill skarsgard, cismale, he/him || ( kazaran morozov ) is a ( 25 ) year old ( senior ) at rockport university studying ( business + literature [TA] ). people say they are ( ardent ) but also ( stoic ), and remind others of ( coffee rings on crisp paper, losing their sense of reality, hushed arguments ). bet they sure didn’t expect anyone to know about ( his plagiarizing to succeed and honor his terminally ill mother he killed ) but someone does, and ( kaz ) better cooperate if they plan to keep their lives. || james, 20, EST ||

hi i’m so sorry this took a long ass time to put out but im herE lmao here’s my baby

tw; murder, addiction/substance abuse, abuse mentions,

gen. info:

full name: kazaran nikolai morozov

nickname(s): kaz

b.o.d.: december 14th

label(s): the escapist, the academic, the fallen, the philanthropist, etc.

height: 6′4″

hometown: bangor, maine

sexuality: str...aigh...t ? question mark ?

biography:

born to a self-made businessman and a philanthropist with a penchant for odd names

his father’s a russian who moved to the u.s. in his childhood who still has many...unique, ties, to the country though none of those are important

his business involves military equipment and he works closely with the u.s.’s military (ahsdfghk conspiracies ?)

and his mother was a plain jane (literally--her name was jane) from a family of politicians; his uncle’s a senator

kaz is the eldest out of seven children (christ) and yes all of their names are just as excessive as ‘kazaran’

grew up with the pressure of the ‘golden child’ title; kaz had to be perfect at everything he did, from his grades to after school activities to manners and presentment

was always expected to follow in his father’s footsteps and like ?? partner with him once he was old enough? 

which is fine and grand except kaz had never given a shit about his father’s business; his real passion had always been for the arts, particularly literature and even more particularly poetry

he found that the arts was probably the most...free, kaz could get, without actively rebelling against his father

b/c god . . . his father is a force to be reckon’d w/

very strict man, likes to be in control constantly, not the...best, emotionally towards his family. or verbally. sometimes physically. y’know.

this really only...amplified, kaz’s perfectionist attitude. it was mostly out of fear of repercussions than much else

kaz has, however, always loved his mother.

jane is the opposite of their father, a woman who loves the world and everybody in it with this...heart of gold, and best intentions in mind

the only problem was that she was horribly submissive to her husband

aNYWAys okay, kaz grew up fairly unscathed but only because he was so...conformist, y’know?

loves his siblings and would die for them, but god--he’d have to side with his father just for his own sake, which definitely strained his relationship with a few of ‘em

AnywAys again; was pretty well-known in his high school

for being like, intimidatingly tall but also was fairly popular? star of the track team, student gov president, in DECA or whatever.

went to rockport just because it wasn’t...too far from home, and partially because he wasn’t allowed to go out of state.

and he was fine w/ it, man

his mother got sick his freshmen year, however, it wasn’t...horrible, at first

it was concerning, yes, but the doctors said she was going to be fine

jane was pretty...adamant about not letting her condition effect her children, too, so she acted as if she was fine

kaz, being a dumbass, was like alright fine this is fine and went on w/ life

sophomore year he met his soulmate; a future veterinarian named freya

n i mean he just...fell for her immediately, y’know ?? n ig she felt similar enough b/c they started dating immediately

it was really...good, for him; especially as his mother’s heath had suddenly taken a turn for the worst

kaz wound up taking two years off of school to care for his mother; his father was gone more often than not, and he felt as if his younger siblings shouldn’t have been burdened with the task

and well...jane never got better, only worse

it was at the point where the doctors had sent her home, knowing that nothing else could be done--she was confined to her bed, and miserable. in pain, really.

one...day, as kaz was tending to jane, she broke down. i mean, just, a full on emotional breakdown, a complete episode, begging him to just...put her out of her misery.

and, god, kaz had never disobeyed his parents (minus his studies in literature but y’knw what. . . not important rn) but that was so ?? morally ?? conflicting ??

they cried together for a long time until y’know. deciding what to do.

as soon as she had fallen asleep, kaz put a pillow to her.

he was never...caught, tho that may have involved some bribery on his father’s end who knows

the day after the funeral, kaz proposed to freya and she agreed.

and it really should’ve been fine if kaz’s mental health didn’t rapidly deteriorate like...he was not handling it well

freya helped, yes, but she could only do so much

turned to drugs, particularly painkillers after a minor car crash and just...a mix of shit, y’know.

probably stole drugs from his fiance’s job tbh

got on antidepressants, which only worsened his shit b/c he started ?? occasionally hallucinating his dead mother ??

his creativity had also just. shat on itself. he couldn’t write, no matter how hard he tried

his mother had really wanted him to pursue his dreams, and god, he was too far in his degree to drop literature

so he started....plagiarizing, his works, b/c kaz is a whole ass idiot. but he hasn’t gotten caught yet, somehow

his fiance thought the cruise program would be a great way for kaz to possibly, recover, since she could see how bad he was doing so he weNt because of her

also yes at this point he had gone back to school; had even gotten a TA position because he used to be...one of the best in his class, y’know ?

anyways yeah im paraphrasing this all horribly but idc u get the point

drug addict, mercy-killed his mother, loves his fiancee, tortured soul, y’know all that

personality:

likes to pretend he’s much calmer than he actually is, y’know

likes the whole aloof and distant thing b/c it’s already so easy for him to be intimidating

he can b a lil snarky, a lil sarcastic, but he’s overall always been really well meaning?

can be extremely passionate about his hobbies, or his future wife, or really...anything he mildly likes, tho, y’know?

gOD is he always feeling so guilty, tho, it really weighs him down

but he’s also like...usually high, sometimes u can tell but more often than not u can’t ??

because he’s obsessed w/ seeming okay. and doing okay. and being that average dude next door, y’know?

he wants to be normal, to feel normal, but he’s got this wave of emotions crashing into his chest and he’s in sm pa i n constantly

like he’s got major anxiety but u won’t know unless u catch him in midst of a panic attack and like he’d rather die than somebody see that

probably journals as a way 2 like...cope, and keep himself calm

uuhh he’s like lowkey a huge softie. will cry at sad movies and won’t care tht he’s crying about it

takes teaching rly seriously but he’s also always concerned somebody’s going to figure out that he’s just. a fraud.

smart, with dumbass energy

like he just...sometimes doesn’t think ??

loves his fiancee a whole bunch but this distance thing is...sm harder than he thought it would be. she’s his anchor and he’s just ?? floating aimlessly now

but yeah he’s always acting like he’s okay, like he’s gucci.

uuuhhhh god i dont know what else to say tbh ?? he’s just. a mans. being a mans.

probably doesn’t sleep super often b/c not only is he a TA, but he’s got some mf nightmares man

wanted connections:

got a girl best friend but he needs a...dude best friend?

other friends in general, honestly

professors he’s got some sort of relationship with b/c he’s working for penelope rn

a flirty unrequited thing, where they keep tryn but kaz is like nO i am TAKEN look at this photo of my beAUTIFUL FIANCEE

ppl pissed at him for the grades he’s given them LMAO

people...concerned? for him?

bad mf influences who are like LET’S GET FUCKED UP

a dealer y’know. somebody on the ship who can give him what he wants which is a Lot

uuh let’s brainstorm together, bb

like srsly just. gimme a like, i’ll pop into ur dms w/ my messy tall son and be like let’s fuck him up !

#rockportintro #sorry this is also . . . lame

[teamkaiforever]

DELICATE

(requested by anon) Kai Parker x Reader word count: 3 950 / reading time: 14 minutes summary: One night, after Kai and the guys from the MF gang had been at the club where Reader works as a stripper, Kai comes to her rescue. note: i might’ve strayed a little from the original idea and lost it on the fluff sprinkles hahh 🙈 *gif by me ________________________________________

Y/N slipped off her shoes and curled up in bed next to her boyfriend, trying to untangle the sheets enough so she could slip closer to him. Her lips placed a soft kiss on his shoulder, her hand finding her way on his chest resting right over his heart. Working late nights, getting home not long before the sun has come up wasn’t something new to her. It was just how her life was. Nothing was easy and to make all her dreams come true required hard work, persistence and money. Working at two places at the same time was a challenge in itself – bartender by day, stripper by night – but she wouldn’t have it any other way. Even if most people didn’t react well when they heard about her secondary job because to them it wasn’t a socially acceptable job. Her parents surely would see it that way if they knew the truth, which she had kept from them for over a year and a half now. But him? Not him. There hadn’t been that look in his eyes. Perhaps it had been because they had met there, or maybe because of who he was. And he was the most amazing person in her life in every possible way. Always keeping her safe, making sure no harm would come to her. He was her knight in shining armor, her safe harbor from the storm. Her home for nearly half a year now and she loved him more than she had loved anyone in her life.

     “Long night?” asked her friend Sarah, sitting a chair away from her in their small changing room at the stripper club. “Those boys sure seemed to never want to let you go –“

Y/N’s lips curled up a little and she put her tips from the night in her bag. “I don’t know about that but they were really generous with the singles. I almost got the first year tuition for college saved up from tonight alone.”

Sarah reached across the empty chair, touching her hand. “So happy for you, Y/N. Look at you, working for your dreams and not waiting for them to happen on their own.” Y/N smiled back at her friend. “That blue eyed guy though, the really handsome one? I’ve never seen anyone look at any of us that way. Those blue eyes, damn. And I bet his hands were like magic –”

Y/N’s eyes widened a little and she blushed a little at the memory of his touch. Unlike his friends, who had been a little more handsy, he had been more guarded. Maybe it was because of that that his touch was the one she remembered most, or maybe it was because his touch still burned on her skin.   “Yeah, there was something different about him.” she said, starting to change back in her old clothes; a white/light blue floral pattern short dress with buttons all the way up on the front and a light gray, almost white, flannel shirt. “Most guys cannot keep their hands away, and he seemed I don’t know…He was either shy, which with a face like his I can’t imagine why or was holding back thinking he’d hurt me or something.” she caught a glance at the clock. “I better go. I got an early shift at the bar and it’s almost 2am now.”

Sarah waved her goodbye. Y/N waved back and slipped out of the back exit, heading down the dark empty small alley behind the club. It was almost summer and the air was warm against her skin, though kind of wet after the storm even at the middle of the night. Full moon illuminated the sky, lighting her way, while a few small clouds floated across the sky, covering the stars twinkling overhead. Her footsteps and the distant sounds of a car driving near by broke the silence and she couldn’t help but smile. Night time was her favorite time of the day. It was peaceful, quiet; kind of as if she were the only person in the whole world.

It was how she liked the world best after a long day hard at work – empty, just her, her headphones and her music. There was something beyond alluring about all of it and she couldn’t resist the feeling even if she tried. Her hand reached in her bag and pulled out her headphones, plugged them in her phone and opened her playlist when a loud sound made her jump and she dropped her phone on the ground. Her gaze drifted around her until a couple of meters away she noticed a cat who had just knocked out one of the trash cans and unbothered by the commotion it had caused, was now licking his paw as if nothing had happened.

    “Hey, there little guy. It’s okay. I won’t hurt you –“ she took a slow step towards the kitten, slightly bending over to pet the little fur ball when she heard whistling behind her. By reflex her head turned towards the sound, regretting it instantly. A couple of guys, who had been at the club until closing time, were walking towards her, calling her ‘Sweetie’ and all kinds of other names they had used back while she was still at work to get her attention. “Sorry, cutie. We’ll have to reschedule our petting session for tomorrow. Promise to get you a treat, k?”

Y/N got up, put her headphones on, pulled her dress down a little and kept walking briskly down the street, trying her best to drown the voices behind her. Her favorite song came up on the playlist and she relaxed a little hearing the familiar chords and the voice of her favorite singer. Three more blocks and you are home, she told herself. Just ignore them. Crossing the street, she turned her head to the sides to see if there are any cars coming and caught a glimpse of the guys who were still following her. They were closing in and even though she could feel their eyes on her, there was something else she couldn’t put her finger on. Or maybe she was just tired and imagining things…

    “Wait up, sweetheart.” called out one of the guys. “Let us look at you. You look so pretty tonight.”

Her stomach churned and she cringed at the words. Being a young attractive girl and a stripper on top it all, she was used to guys constantly looking at her. It was her work, in a way, but that was a whole other thing. It seemed impossible that words said otherwise by people she felt something for could make her feel so uncomfortable in her own skin and the fact someone just touched her hand only made it worse.

  “Slow down beautiful—“

  “Don’t touch me –“ she yanked her hand away, realizing the guys friends were closing by; her hand slipped in her bag and she clutched the paper spray. “Or I swear –”

  “You swear what, sweetheart?” he put his hands on her again but she pushed them away. “What can such a little thing do to us?”

The guy put his hands on her again when without any warning, someone yanked him back and punched him so hard the crack of the guy’s jaw getting broken hung in the air for almost a whole minute. The guy dropped down to the ground, wiping blood off his lip and looked up to see who had attacked him. Last person she had expected to see there had been the blue-eyed young man who hadn’t been able to take his eyes off her the entire time at the strip club. Same young man whose hands she could still feel on her body.

  “I believe the lady didn’t want you touching her.” he looked down at the guy with a light smirk and amusement on his face, though his eyes burned with anger. For a moment she saw his face change but instead of fear it made her feel like fire was running through her veins instead of blood. “I’d listen if I were you cuz –“ he chuckled. “—there are no limits to where I’d go to get rid of you lot.” then he turned towards the guy’s friends. “Anyone else wants to take a shot? I’m hungry as it is –“

Y/N glanced at him and then at the guys, who said something between themselves and turned around; the guy who had been on the ground until a minute ago running up to catch up with his friends. However, unlike them she seemed completely frozen in place. Her eyes drifted between the gang turning around the corner and her savior, wondering what his intentions were specially after what she had seen only a moment ago. Should’ve known, she thought to herself and as if to answer her question, he took a step towards her. He reached for her, but stopped himself seeing how she was shaking a little.

  “A-are you okay?” he asked concerned. Her eyes met with his and she lightly shook her head. “I’m not going to hurt you. I promise, I just –“ he outstretched his hand towards her. “I’m Kai. Kai Parker. We met earlier at your work –“

  “I know. Those lustful blue eyes are hard to forget.” she said quietly, looking into his eyes before shaking his hand. “W-were you following me?”

Kai glanced at his shoes, scratching his forehead nervously. Stalking hadn’t been his intention, yet that had been exactly what he had done after splitting up with Damon, Stefan and the rest of the male half of Mystic Falls gang. For a little while he had hung around the strip club, waiting for her unable to explain to himself what it was about her that had pulled him in the second he had seen her that night. He just knew he had to see her one more time, make sure she got home safely and if he was lucky – gather up the courage to talk to her, maybe ask her out, without looking stalkery. Which, right now he did.

    “Sort of. Not really. I um… kind of.” he smiled nervously. “I just, I wanted to make sure you got home safely. Not to sound like one of those guys, but such a beautiful girl shouldn’t be walking alone in the darkest hours of the night. It’s dangerous and you are so… tiny and delicate. I mean, I –“

Y/N tried to suppress a smile. There was genuine concern in his voice and a part of her felt bad for what she was about to do to him, though she knew he’d be more than fine considering what he was. Even in the darkness, it hadn’t been hard missing the flickering veins under his eyes when he had threatened the rest of the guys stalking her. He took a slight step towards her just when she punched him in the stomach, making him stumble backwards right before her knee connected with his chin. Kai fell on the ground, looking at her completely stunned when her high heel found its way on his neck.

  “Tiny, yes, but I’m not that delicate.”

  “Damn, that’s hot.” he took a shallow breath, taking her hand and got up. “Beyond hot. I um …How about I walk you home, just to make sure those guys don’t change their mind? Doubt you can take all of them at once –” she grabbed his hand and tossed him in the air as if it was nothing and he found himself back on the ground. “Alright, message received. Not a damsel in distress. Dang, you are strong for a little thing –“

  “My father is a cop.” she winked at him, watching him flip himself back to his feet. “He thought me a thing or two.”

  “I’m still walking you home though –“ Kai straightened his jacket, lightly running his fingers through his hair. “If that’s okay with you, I mean.”

  “Suit yourself.”  she hugged her body feeling the slight chill in the air and took a few steps towards her apartment. “I’m guessing you want something in exchange for saving me, my knight in shining armor?”

  “I’m more like the big bad wolf or the evil wizard of the story than a knight.” Kai laughed, his laugh making her laugh.  “Why would I want something from you? What kind of sense would that make to save the beautiful girl and then expect something from her in exchange?”

  “Then why did you do it?”

  “Because –“ he sighed, remembering the guy’s words from only a few moments ago. “– no girl should have to go through this. There are ways to do this right and just cuz you are a stripper, it doesn’t give them the right to act like that. Not out here and not in the club.” they strolled down the street. “You are just trying to make a living.”

  “Wow.” she smiled. “That’s a first. Usually people judge and say it’s ‘ an unsuitable lifestyle for a girl my age’.” she put air quotes around the words. “Either your plans include me swooning a little over you or –“

  “A little?” he asked amused, gesturing towards himself. “Look at me, you were swooning all night.”

Y/N laughed, her laugh making him laugh. “A little bit, yeah.” she ran her fingers through her hair. “Though um… you didn’t touch as much, unlike your friends who were all over me. Mind me asking, why? Didn’t you like what you saw?”

Kai glanced at his shoes and nervously scratched his forehead. “They are not my friends, not exactly. I guess it’s complicated.” he laughed for a moment, looking at her while they walked down the street. “I’ve never seen someone so radiant, innocent and beautiful before until you walked in the room in that school girl outfit. I just – it didn’t seem right. Touching you, I mean. It’s what happens at strip clubs but… you must have a boyfriend and if you were my girl, I’d go crazy knowing other guys are touching what’s mine. Neither of them would make it out alive if they breathe around you –”

  “I um, I don’t have a boyfriend.” she said quietly, rubbing her forearms with her palms to warm up. A slight chill had shown up in the air, making her regret not getting her jacket from home earlier.

  “Are you cold? Take my jacket –” he asked, taking off his jacket ignoring her protests. Y/N shook her head, trying to take a step back but the moment their eyes met, her battle was lost. His fingertips brushed gently against her neck while he fixed the jacket, lightly pulling it around her shoulders to make sure it’s set perfectly. “Better?”

  “Thanks.” she smiled, taking a shallow breath watching hi lightly pursue his lips. Just that was enough to make her skin on fire but the way he looked at her in that moment – it was all too much. “So blue –“

Kai grinned at her. “How come you don’t have a boyfriend?”

  “Guess, I haven’t met the right guy.” she laughed under her breath, both of them taking a few steps down the street coming around a giant puddle. “So um, feel free to touch next time. As much as you want. I mean, that’s part of why you go to the club –”

   “No, I –“ he lightly shook his head, swung his hands under her knees in a flash and scooped her up, carrying her over the puddle. Her hands instinctively hooked around his neck and she lightly rested her forehead on his shoulder for a moment before he let her feet on the ground. Suddenly she stumbled a little, making him pull her closer and the next moment her heel broke.  “I’m sorry – I, were those your favorite shoes?“

   “Kinda. Sort of. Not really.” she laughed, glancing at the broken heel while holding onto Kai’s shoulder. “I’m more of a sneakers girl. Hold on –” she bent over slightly and took off her heels. “Much better.”

Kai laughed under his breath. “You are going to go barefoot? In April? In the middle of spring?”

   “Sure thing. It’s just a block away.” she laughed. “And it’s not that cold.”

   “Like a barefoot Cinderella.” Kai whispered, making her look at him with curiosity in her eyes. “Sorry, I um… it just popped in my head.” 

   “Cinderella’s glass shoes wouldn’t have broken, though–” she laughed, gazing into his eyes. So blue, reminding her of the ocean during those hot summer days where the sea is calm and water is so see through, she could never stop herself from going in.   “Who are you?” she placed her palm over his chest to keep him from literally swooping her off her feet again and carrying her home like a princess. “Really? You act like a freaking gentleman. Saving me from those guys, the jacket, carrying me over a puddle and now this.” she shrugged her shoulders, shaking her head in confusion. “There is something about you that just, I don’t know…”

Kai glanced at his shoes and took a step towards her. “I’m not human.” he whispered in her ear before gazing into her eyes, “But already know that, don’t you? You saw my face change earlier. Yet you didn’t run. Most people would’ve –“

   “In case you haven’t figured it out –“ she leaned a little towards him. “– I’m not most people. I don’t scare easily and I can tell you are dying a little –“ she trailed her finger lightly over his crotch and up his shirt, biting her lip.“You can touch if you want to.”

  “Are you flirting with me?” his lips curled into a small smirk. “Damn, and here I was thinking I was the one who’d get to do that first –“

Y/N looked shyly at the ground, feeling his fingertips brush against her cheek before he tucked in a strand of hair behind her ear. Electricity went straight through her the second he tilted her chin up and their eyes met. The one, she thought and smiled to herself. There had been so many guys she had met, who had looked at her with lustful eyes but neither could compare. None of them had made her feel the way she felt in that moment, complete. Like she had found something she didn’t even know was missing.

  “Whoops –“ she laughed. “Guess I beat you to it. Though I’m not really good at it.”

A smile tugged at his lips and just as she took a step down the street, he swooped her off her feet with no warning. Her eyes met with his; her palm brushing against his cheek for a moment before her hands once again hitched around his neck and he continued down the street, barely able to take his eyes off her. Why was she looking at him like that and why did it make him feel all warm and fuzzy on the inside? Most importantly how had they gotten to  her place so fast? It seemed they had spent only a few seconds together but it had been minutes. And why did the thought of them going their separate ways hurt both of them so much? 

     “This is it, right?” he let her feet down, though not on the ground but on top of his so her feet didn’t actually touch the ground. “It’s um, it’s a nice building –”

Y/N nodded, reaching in her bag for the keys. “I um… Would you like to come inside? We can have a drink or something. I never apologized for –”

  “Kicking my ass?” Kai’s lips curled up into a smile. “I’d love to come in, though maybe not tonight.” Y/N’s shoulders dropped a little. “But… how about we meet up for coffee sometime and you can apologize for stealing my breath away then?”

   “I’d love to.” her eyes lit up. “How about tomorrow?”

   “It’s a date.”

Y/N snuggled closer, lightly tugging at his shirt before slipping her hand under it. Five months had passed since that night during which Kai had gone from being her friend to being something more. Whenever she was working late he was there, watching over her even though he thought she didn’t know. He had been at the bar earlier too and something told her he wasn’t as asleep as he pretended to be. “Kai? Wake up–” Kai stirred in his sleep and pulled her into his arms. “W-what time is it? ”     “Like 1.30AM. Sorry, my shift ran late.” her lips pressed against his briefly against his before he pulled her in for a long deep kiss. “I’ll have to have words with the manager about keeping me away from you for so long –“      “You don’t have to work anymore, you know.” he mumbled, opening his eyes. “You got me. I’ll take care of your every need. Whatever you want, just say the words and I’ll get it for you. The stars, the moon, that car you have your eyes set on –”      “What? Like you are my sugar daddy?” she bit his nose playfully. Kai pulled away laughing. “I like working plus… I got promoted!”      “You did?” he grinned, his eyes lighting up. “Congratulations!” he leaned towards her, wanting to steal a kiss but she pushed him away a little. Her eyes pierced into his so intensely, it was as if she was looking directly into his soul. “What? Are you going to deny your boyfriend a kiss after all those long long looong lonely hours spent without you?”     “No shortcuts. I told you –“     “I didn’t compel anyone to give you the manager position.” he protested. “Swear –“     “So Kelly, who has never liked any animal in her life, who doesn’t even like people, just decided to go with a large group of animal activists to save the caribou in Australia on her own?”     “Well, people change you know.” he gave her his best innocent expression. “Your lectures about the planet, the animals and everything it must’ve paid off –“     “There are no caribous in Australia!” Kai pulled her towards him, showering her with kisses while tickling her and listening to her laugh. “Come on, you know you deserve that promotion. It’s been like what? Three years of bar-tending? I merely sped things up for my girl.”     “You are without a doubt –” she tried to push him away pointlessly. “—the most unbelievably stubbo–”     “– hot person on the planet? Yes, I absolutely agree with your statement.” he laughed, playfully biting her nose. “It’s why you love me.”     “So full of yourself.” she rolled her eyes, laughing. “I don’t love you cuz you are unbelievably hot. I mean, I do but that night we met? That was the first time I felt… normal. Complete. Like no matter what life throws at me, I can make it through. Not because my boyfriend is a vampire, but because I have someone by my side. As long as I have you.“      “I get what you mean. That’s the same way I felt the moment I laid my eyes on you that night. Everything fell into place and I – I never told you this, but I wanted you to be only mine the second I saw you. Thats why I held back. I didn’t trust myself I wouldn’t hurt you in my desire to have you all to myself.”      “I’m all yours now.” she said softly. “And every night, cuz… I think, with the manager salary, I don’t need to keep a second job and you don’t have to worry about anyone else touching what’s yours anymore.”

 ________________________________________  MASTERLIST- SMUT ‘17 /  MASTERLIST- SMUT ‘18 MASTERLIST- FLUFF ‘17 / MASTERLIST - FLUFF/ANGST ‘18

#my gifs #kai parker #kai parker x reader #kai parker fluff #kai parker imagine #malachai parker #malachai parker fluff #malachai parker x reader #malachai parker imagine #kai!fluff #kai parker drabble #the vampire diaries #the vampire diaries imagine #the vampire diaries fluff #tvd #tvd imagine #tvd fluff #tvd drabble #kai parker fanfiction #the vampire diaries fanfiction #fan fiction #fiction #fanfic #fan fic #fanfic: mine #imagines #fluff

[the-writers-bookshelf]

Just sharing my oc Iiestr and some of the building I've done! He's my favourite of because he was originally a cat person, then a cat shape shifter, then a person, then a cat, and now he is a shapeshifter (panther) with different names every time I polished him up: Finn, Flynn, Flyn, Jean, and finally Iiestr. He comes from Deliengea, a fantasy world.

Also, my writing blog is here for more info @nothingbutchilledwriting

Iiestr wanted nothing more than to be just like his mother: Proud, hard-headed and stubborn. She was the most amazing warrior, holding her head high against anyone and anything, and admired her skill, expertise and determination. He wanted to be revered, respected, as a figure of strength, endurance, and everything else his mother stood for. She played by her own rules, listened to nobody but herself, and tolerated no bullshit.

He has, in some aspects, lived up to his mother’s name; being the stubborn, relentless, and proud mf he is. However, most of her teachings were lost on him and, no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t reach the same calibre of his mother’s technique and precision.

(Having come from a low income, poor and struggling background, Iiestr didn’t have much to look forward to. He only had his mom and her teachings but he wouldn’t have it any other way.)

Many of his early teenage years consisted of scavenging, pick pocketing and surviving on crumbs that it left no time or room to practise what she taught him. It didn’t help either that the military beat what little knowledge he had left out of him.

Iiestr doesn't quite have a goal. He just wants peace and quiet. Nobody to bother or pester him during his alone time (read all the time), and no noise, questions or emotions or people he has to be considerate of.

He exists in the present and has very little planning for the future and takes it day by day.

He just really needs his space and doesn't enjoy any many people in his personal bubble or even 10ft away from him. He doesn't trust people and would rather keep his distance than test boundaries or limits, so he can come off as cold or standoffish to people who are new to him. His comfort and safety always come first, no matter the situation, and he'll ensure that himself first hand if need be.

However, other than this, there is another thing that Iiestr would probably want the most is to have Murtair back. They ended with a nasty fight and he hasn't seen Murtair for months now. Missing the company of his partner and his shenanigans (despite Murtair pissing him off half the time just for shits and giggles), Iiestr regrets walking away even though he was completely justified to do so. He's still very hurt but wants to amend the relationship before it's too late, except he doesn't know how and his pride prevents him from making amends. So he just sits and waits, hoping that Murtair would come to him first so that he didn't have to take that first step.

He can be a sarcastic ass and really cold but to be honest, he just doesn't know how to express himself all that well, often too tired to talk, and doesn't trust strangers. His interactions with the group are probably the my favourite aspect of his character because he can go from the protective big brother with the twins to being an absolute douche to Elodea because he thinks it's fun to wind her up.

His voice is kinda low, not really deep kinda average, and he has a light scottish accent. He doesn't sing but he does enjoying humming. If he tried singing he could be decent but he doesn't enjoy it. Can't whistle to save his life.

Pasive agressive and incredibly violent. Iiestr doesn't like people and he isn't the best with interactions so he has made a few enemies. When he gets into a fight, he fights dirty and anything goes. He won't actively pursue an enemy but if he does happen to find one, Iiestr is one them before they can blink.

He's cold and vulgar and doesn't really give a shit. Intimidating as hell, merciless and an asshole when he wants to ward people off.

When it comes to fear, he squashes it down and forces himself through it. He sees it as weakness and refuses to let himself give in to fear, or even feel it for a moment. He ignores it, sweeps it under the rug, but once he gets overwhelmed, he's running in the opposite direction.

People think he is anti social but he can be really open and conversational with particular people. So most of the time he is by himself (by choice) and avoids crowded areas. His social battery drains real quick, not that he has much to begin with, and he needs time after to recharge.

Iiestr's biggest turning point was when he lost his mother. She was his biggest supporter, his source of love and affection. Constantly teaching him new skills like archery and sewing.

But when she suddenly disappeared at age 10, he felt like he lost a piece of himself along with her. Crying out in the middle of the night for months on end for somebody that would never come.

Since then, things just started spiraling down hill faster than Iiestr could cope with.

He was practically alone after this, since nobody knew where his father was either. And he didn't have any known relatives. So for two and a half years, he lived by himself, pick pocketing, stealing and doing whatever he could to get money.

This lead to him getting thrown into prison multiple times, getting roughed up by random strangers who had a strange vendetta against kids, and accidentally getting involved with dangerous groups and practises.

Those two and half years, of dealing with the loss of his mother and the constant fight to survive, had left him cold, emotionless, distrusting of people and with a shit tonne of trauma. He was no longer the happy, go lucky boy he was before. The shy kid that would hide underneath his mother's dress, playing with the rabbits in the garden while his mother watched. That boy was gone.

He picked up bad habits such as slouching from his mother cause she always seemed to hunch over. But as soon as she noticed, she actively put effort into standing straight so that Iiestr wouldn't grow up with crap posture (he still slouched though).

His mother taught him how to play a wind instrument, similar to a flute. He wasn't very good at it but she didn't seem to mind. In fact, his mother would ask to hear him play, especially in the the mornings, while she gardens.

She also taught him useful skills such as seeing, how to mend clothes, stitching and such. Teaching him archery aswell because he saw her do it once and he was so fascinated that he demanded she teach him.

With the archery, she taught him never to use animals for target practise or to kill without reason. If he was going to kill, he had to pray for the animal before killing it and he had to use the entire body and leave nothing to waste.

THIS IS SO COOL and so emotionally wrenching and just wonderful!!! You will ALWAYS hook me into reading any fiction with a cat-related character :) :) :)

Followed your writing blog for more updates!! ♥

#asks #fab friday writers #writers on tumblr #chilledpolarbeer #nothingbutchilledwriting