#MY FRIEND LOST HER FUCKING MIND

[dungeons-and-dragon-age]

Hiii everyone, say, how do your Hawkes go go about sharing their estate? If they do it at all? Is everyone free to come and go or are they more private? Or do they only invite their LI to stay? I'm curious!! :)

#lay rambles #my ocs #oc: liam hawke #oc: lilian hawke #both my hawkes are very social w their friends but i love comparing their boundaries around it #theres variation in rules for specific ppl with both of them ofc but theres still general differences #with liam its all very open and everyone can p much come and go whenever #they dont get extra keys (theyll get lost and he doesnt want randos finding them lol) but they know where to find the spare key #and bodhan and sandal and orana know to let them in whenever #hes very lenient in this this regard but he does have rules abt what he does and doesnt want them to do #mostly its about not making too much of a mess lol bc liam prefers to clean himself #(he doesnt trust the crew with his household and also he has particular ways of doing things and Hates when theyre done differently) #so things like keep your dirty garb at the entrance dont cook by yourselves (this was banned after they did it one (1) time lol) etc #also no fucking allowed. do that somewhere else for the love of the maker he does NOT want to walk into that in his own house #(and it also comes back to liam not trusting them with cleaning but also Not wanting to clean that up lol) #also he is not fond of them going into his room uninvited. most of the house is chill but that is *his* space #he accommodates these rules by e.g. having spare slippers and a little washing basin in the entrance hall for dirty shoes/feet #always makes sure to have snacks in stock that he knows they like #food will have notes abt what to leave for leandra/orana/etc but otherwise food is prepared with his friends in mind #and in general he'll make sure to adjust the space/routine in little ways to accommodate them #(air out when fen isnt there cus he doesnt like drafts; keep curtains open cus anders prefers open spaces; etc) #lilian on the other hand doesnt like when her friends come into the estate without a heads up (cept for emergencies) #but once they have her 'ok' its basically mi casa es su casa #dont yknow. overdo it and get too rowdy but otherwise do whatever #however. she also expects everyone to clean up after themselves. she aint here to play maid and youre all adults #also liam has a general 'please try to not be too wild when leandra is here' and lilian doesnt #not cos she doesnt care but cos leandra is bothered by sth she can speak up herself #oh and lilian uses the basement space as temporary refuge for anyone who needs it (mostly escaped mages) #also side note: both offered gamlen to stay but he refused (out of pride/remorse) #...this got long and i ran out of tag space lmfao so this is it for now xD

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

I saw that you might actually kill off some characters in your lights out au and pls pls pLS PROVIDE SOFT CUTE DOODLES OF THE DECEASED BECAUSE MY HEART CANNOT HANDLE IT- ESPECIALLY WALLY ORZ

Also me, the dark side that loves whump fics: Suffer! Make them cry! Make me cry! Do your worst!!!!

ah, but if i provided soft scribbles Then! you would all know Who kicks the bucket(s)!! and i'm not sure if i'm ready to share those details yet <3

#i mean ive pretty much all but confirmed frank oopsies <3 #but who's to say he's the only one? who's to say the others arent like... howdy or julie? or poppy? eddie? who's! to! say! #(also i might be editing like. a gigantic chunk of the au because i had a couple of Realizations) #so things are... shifting slightly in my mind #frank still needs to die tho. sorry lmfao it's integral to the plot #he needs to haunt the narrative! #wh lights out au #rambles from the bog #damn wait im out here being like 'barnaby gets aggressive' while julie is Right Fucking There #she inherits the baseball bat and woe upon anyone who dares look at her friends wrong #like barns gets aggressive but not really Violent #but julie gets (even more) aggressive And violent #she lost her frank! she's not losing anyone else! if anyone's gonna die next its gonna be her!

[fyodorkitkat]

Going into 2024 with a respect for what I've lost but hope for roads ahead 🙏💜

#this year was rough but what i found myself thinking about mostly this morning was my late friend tammy. and then subsequently everyone #else ive lost in the past few years #yes things were difficult with relationships jobs general life things. a lot of things changed for me in the last months as well that #were out of my control and because of that infuriated me #and i found myself thinking about what tammy would have probably said to me if she had been alive and in her right mind while i was going #through all of these things #and she would have said 'shut the fuck up jay. if you're telling me this then you're fine and you got to make it. you got to be here so #yell if you want to break some shit if you need to. but just keeping looking forward' #she said things similar to me before so it is like i heard it in her raspy yet lilted voice. anyways this is getting really sentimental #and personal but. i wont tempt things saying 2024 will be great for me. but at the very least i have hope i can make it what i #need it to be. no matter what ends up happening #if you read this ty and sry sry. i hope you have a nice start to your new year and plenty of calm vibes this year #-pers #-cw death mention #but it is in the tags #also super secret lue lore with a prev name drop but i wasnt thinking about that idc yall can know one of my old ones im not editing it

[toastsnaffler]

everyone say thank u to my roommate for going to visit her parents this weekend so I can jack it loud and nasty 🙏

#i love her but there are some benefits to having the flat to myself.... love getting to wander around in just my boxers + a tshirt too #things i could do while she was still here if i wasnt a pussy 🙄 #jk itd just make her uncomfortable and im too respectful for that #having a lowkey crush on her is an endless comedy to me bc we would be so woefully incompatible romantically #and also sexually.. historically ive only ever stone topped bc ive never been comfortable enough w anyone to let them fuck me #despite very much Not being stone or exclusively a top. and i think shes some form of sex repulsed anyway so like. sits there dead silence #and also shes so in love with her other friends and i showed up late to that party.... ive been feeling kinda guilty lately bc ik- #she misses them a lot and wishes we'd be able to stay roommates w them too. and im a pretty poor replacement for them tbh #and i love spending time with her but whenever i do i feel kinda painfully aware im not them like i could never fill that space #and asking to hang out more with her always feels like im taking away from time she could be talking to them. or even being alone ik she- #likes her own company and i get that a lot too so its chill but ahh.. man #i dont mean this in a bitter or jealous way at all like theyre all such sweet ppl i couldnt ever hold it against them #theyre kind of a 3 headed cerberus type situation and im like. the stray puppy they found on the side of the road #theres nothing they can do differently i was just born to be alienated from other ppl forever until i die. and someday i hope ill- #finally get used to it and accept i wont ever feel like im enough for anyone else or feel like anything else is enough for me #old wounds healed over 5082 times that still hurt to touch but i cant help pressing my fingers into them anyway bc its a familiar pain etc #anyway lost where i was going with this its just been on my mind again recently. i hate to be pitied i hate to feel like im only included- #bc they didnt want me to feel left out i hate feeling like a shoddy secondhand stand-in and its been a lot of that lately #also been a little annoyed bc sometimes it feels like shes trying to micromanage my social life and girl. we're not close enough for that #im sure its well intentioned but im not part of what they have going on i cant compete in that ring so dont try to push me into it.. #ahhh. its all ok tho one of the guys is coming to visit next month which will be rly fun but ill try to give them some space too #its good at least im doing this processing now bc group situations can be spike traps of triggers for me sometimes #regardless of how good friends i am w ppl and ive already had a wobble a few weeks ago w how i cope and i dont want it to become a #fully fledged regular issue again bc its so hard to crawl back out of that pit. anyway losing coherence here im gonna stop rambling #and go make myself an early dinner and then back to drawing........ #sorry for long tags if ur reading this blows u a kiss but go find a better use of ur time girl!! #.diaries

[opens-up-4-nobody]

Boruto things that made me lose my mind (ep 94-119):

I like how none of the kids from the original naruto teams are friends as adults lmao

Chocho: how could my mom love my dad? It has to be his ravenous appetite

Kakashi @ sasuke: lol u r so bad at bonding with ur daughter *proceeds to give him terrible advice*

Kakashi telling sasuke how to interact with his daughter: use a soft and loving voice. When you talk to naruto- (ok stop, let's appreciate your line of throught right there)

Sasuke @ sarada: I wanted to be hokage once (and babygirl that was one of your top 10 most fucking batshit insane moments)

OK the cursed marks apparently use genetic manipulation, which is odd and really interesting. I assume it works like a virus, inserting and expressing foreign... demonic? DNA. Weird.

Why are all anime scientists evil?

Karin: time to torch all these cursed geese 🔥 Sarada: no, stand back, I'll do it myself 😠

The more they say Karin is not sarada's mother, the less I believe it

...a goose they said was genetically incapable of flying flew away... fucking what? Just tying hard in exactly the same way as everyone else is not how you overcome genetic disadvantages like that????

Why all this moralizing abt kindness toward animals? This is a show where kids beat the shit out of eachother and murder ppl. Can we focus on not doing that maybe???

Orochimaru: hm looks like mitsuki is becoming too gay, we may have to delete all his memories 😔

Kakashi: why dont u wanna believe in ghosts? Mirai: if ghosts are real, why hasn't my dad visited me? (Hey kakashi, this would b a good time to tell her abt the time u spent literally dead? No? Ok cool)

THE CULT OF JASHIN?! HAHAHA. Losers.

Why tf do they even hold the chunin exams? Just promote ppl based on merit like they literally just did with shikadai??? (Historically its bc ppl like watching death matches)

The commercialization of the shinobi within the village makes me wanna spit and bite

Houki abt kakashi: the one who nourished lord 7th 😤 (is that really true tho? I mean he did his best but team 7 was a clusterfuck)

Konohamaru: there is no shortcut to becoming hokage! (Yeah sure but there is huge favoritism toward those trained by the previous hokage...)

Boruto: people aren't in love unless they overtly say it (I love to image this is how Boruto sees how ppl feel abt everything and that's y he's so loud and blunt abt things)

Random village: we stave off a demon by joining two bloodlines in an act of incest ✌️

Konohamaru, casually: my grandpa died by entering a deal with an entity beyond human comprehension 🤷‍♂️

#back on my naruto bullshit 🤪 #i just lost my mind at the hot springs thing and rage quit. it just makes me furious on so many levels #bc they obviously arent training the shinobi correctly???? like they dont seem to do any field training??? hello??? #i dont understand. also why has no one sat down with mirai and been like: let me tell u abt ur dad #its bc no ones friends anymore so no one ever sees her so shes like idk jack abt my dad lil #whatever. also in ep120 himawari @ boruto is like: Grandpa is gonna b mad abt u not camping with us #and all i could think was: aw hima fuck ur grandpa!!! bc i have successi0n brain lmao #anyway this was a lotta bullshit in these episodes #i think a lot was supposed to b fan service but it just made me mad hahaha get back to the plot pls #i get so mad at the characters and then boruto comes back onscreen and im like: oh there u r my son #and that is not the reaction i anticipated when i started this show lol. i cannot deny i am a boruto apologist #boruto #naruto #naruto ramblings #i cut out everytime i told one of the kids to shut the fuck up bc it was a lot

[arsonist-chicken]

Do you ever like.. get a sudden surge of love and admiration and just general happiness because of a friend, so much so that it's almost overwhelming, and you are just so, so glad you met them and hope you'll never have to let them go and get to keep them in your life forever? Yeah ❤️💖🐗🧚‍♂️🦄

#i should go to sleep #but these are the moments i wonder again if i know what a crush feels like and if i can tell the difference between periodical very strong #but platonic affection for a friend and having a tiny crush on them #oh well. in the end does it matter? #but it would still be nice to be able to tell the difference. if nothing else then to know when i actually have a crush on someone i'm not #that close to like that friend or that fond of #fucking hell god please never let me have to let them go. i don't think i've ever met someone i'm that comfortable around and around whom #it's so easy to just be myself #or rarely. maybe with two other friends i don't feel the need to hold back myself from blurting stuff out and interrupting them and #apologising and asking them to continue or just like.. say whatever comes to mind or touch electric pasture fences to see if it still stings #(it does btw but in a sensorally really nice way 10/10 would recommend) #why do amazing people often live so damn far away? last time i met a bunch of people i really got to love was almost lifesaving and #definitely mental health saving. we used to talk every day and now i barely know what any of them are up to :( covid really fucked us over #with everyone just trying to survive and stay sane. we really lost touch and now it #*it's hard to get that back because we're strewn across europe and brasil and the us and everyone's an adult with responsibilities now #i miss them :( gotta try harder to rekindle that #anyway @the universe or whatever fuckers listening: if you put me in circumstances that make me lose touch with her like with them #i'll set the world on fire. she's become far too important to me to let that happen #okay as always i couldn't damn shut up in the tags alright bye bye good night whatever my cat's purring now instead of snoring #scientists of tumblr invent a teleportation machine now. i want to lie in a park and watch dogs and read side by side and remember how good #life can be #mine

[fma03envy]

Beginning-of-the-timeskip sketch

#not nearly far enough in2 my 03 rewatch 2 b knowledgeable on the subject(my memory can b questionable)but Im having timeskip brainrot again #like given that Rose wasn't in her right mind when all the stuff in the underground city was going on and Al lost his memories of it #the only person who came back to Winry who could tell her what happened to Ed would be Wrath right? #so she would look at this child who she knows has a vested interest in killing Ed #at the fact that he looks like he's been in a brutal fight #and at Ed being gone #like ''hey kiddo uh. did you kill my friend?'' #and Wrath is probably having So Many Emotions at the time #like two of the most fundamental parts of Wrath's character are his desire for familial love which makes him latch onto Sloth as his mother #and his trauma over being stuck in the Gate #but Wrath's never been through the gate. He can't have any actual reason to believe there is a ''through'' to it #so we have Edward. who fucking killed Sloth but who also as far as Wrath knows is trapped in the Gate just as Wrath had found tortuous #would Wrath pity Ed? would he think Ed got what he deserved? Would Wrath wish the gate on anyone? #and Wrath'd be stuck in Resembool while getting his automail done #Surrounded by people who care about Ed and want him to tell them what happened to Ed. with all his old allies dead/as good as dead #god early timeskip must have been so much for Wrath #my art #fma #fma 03 #Winry Rockbell #Wrath #timeskip/cos al + wrath stuff #<- ik Al's not in this post but it's in a similar vein

[transgaysex]

god remember jake marshall. from rfta

#wind howls #in the ace attorney playthru my friends and i are doing we are now onto rise from the ashes #i think we stopped still on the first day of the trial. the worst is yet to come and im very excited about it. #genuinely one of the few cases in ace attorney that actually made me feel some sort of dread and fear by the end of it when i played it #im voicing jake and also angel starr bc its funny. im trying to make jake sound american to the best of my non american abilities #and angel starr i gave her an uninterested cafeteria lady voice. maybe not original but im having fun #that on top of already voicing thr judge i love voicing the judge so much. i gave him my best goofy impression hes a blast to voice #who else did i voice. i voiced yani yogi. gave him a throaty voice. occasionally i do larry when nobody else wants him (i dont either) #who else is there in the game. OH OH will powers i voiced him. also wendy oldbag her voice fucked me up BAD #before my friend darin joined us i also voiced gumshoe but since then darin took the role and his impression is a lot more fun hehe #voicing characters in a visual novel is so much fun you guys. if you can gather up pals and have someone play the game for the first time- #definitely recommend giving out silly voices. especially if they have rare voiced lines in the game #you cannot imagine the absolute glee i felt when darin gave manfred von karma his youtuber Fred impression. only to hear is objection later #and realizing his voice is actually the deepest in the fucking game. it was so fucking funny i lost my whole mind it was awesome #anyway. game is fun #ghost trick is also a fun game ive seen get voiced by groups of friends. definitely recommend playing that one in a group as well

[irrolyphant]

.

#tw death #[.] #it’s weird the things you find yourself obsessing over and prioritising when you’re given the chance to prepare for when a loved one dies #like i’m big into christmas. it’s my security blanket & i have an ‘emergency christmas’ playlist on my phone for when i’m melting down etc #& with dad’s health being what it is. i’ve become obsessed with the need to create a playlist for mum to listen to after he’s gone #i’ve spent countless hours creating a christmas playlist which doesn’t include any songs about loss or missing loved ones #please come home for christmas. lonely this christmas. #even have yourself a merry little christmas isn’t okay #so yeah. i don’t know if it’s normal to be prioritising christmas music in august when you know time’s running out but #when it happens. his absence will be everywhere. #the last thing i want is for her to not even be able to listen to music without it rubbing it in her face #idk #that’s what i’ve been up to lately 🤷🏻‍♀️ #sorry. i’m rambling at 3am #also #i lost my uncle and a family friend in the last two weeks and my mind’s been fixating even harder on christmas since then #the effort i had to put into NOT making gifs of tim in a santa hat in ‘go’ because it’s fucking august & not everyone is insane like me 🙈

[tomatoluvr69]

Lauryn hill concert ft fugees AND Delfonics AND the roots 🤯 lost my miiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiind it was so good

#The score will be top five albums forever… #had THE most abhorrent drive to get here my brain feels like it’s blasted with sandpaper #and my friends wanted to sneak down into better seats and that freaked me out incredibly badly because I am neurotypical and adaptable #she did a bunch of stuff from the miseducation but when the fugees stuff started….my godddd #she had the fucking DELFONICS??!!!!!!!!!! unbelievable unbelievable show #also wyclef and pras are both incredible live. it was so so so good #and you could tell her vocal chords are fried and even then it was fucking incredible #I was like…if this is you with your voice super fucked up…goddamn. goddamn #unbelievable #lost my mind

[nerosdayinanime]

I know I wasn't the person that originally asked about Giyuucore songs but that post caught my interest because you mentioned a lot of songs and some of my favorites👀

I'd really like to hear your thoughts on Gilded Lily! I've seen it taken in a couple different contexts online but idk anyone that listens to it. After Dark is another banger but I never considered thinking of it as Giyuucore. the same thing with Little Dark Age talk about blorbo, think about blorbo :)

also I listened to The Mute and The Missing Road for the tag you left on my one drabble and 😭 i see it so clearly with how so socially awkward little blorbo is

usually i think of my music taste as mainstream but not like. Popular mainstream yk? usually at least, since i started only really using spotify it kinda just Sticks with popular... (i just think the music i listen to its pretty all over the place) anyway-

Gilded Lily got me from the chorus haven't i given enough? giyuu gives his all yet still all the shit that happens to him and the people he loves... with him in mind the lyric reads as more a polite way of asking higher powers 'havent you taken enough from me?' yk?

always the fool with the slowest heart hes always behind his peers and misunderstood, negative feedback loop of hiding further in himself and straying further behind

but i know youll take me with you when he loves he gives a piece of himself, so when they're lost they take a piece of him with them i know ill take you with me the haori he so dearly cares for

we'll live in spaces between walls how ghosts are respected as existing in a third place, the border between life and death- how giyuu does something similar, as close as a ghost you can get without death- hes treats himself the same as the ghosts that haunt him

last lyric for gilded lily is manga spoliers and iirc youre an anime-only, so ill keep that one under wraps lmao

-------

After Dark is all dreams and broken memories, the echo-y voice and faraway sound of the piano all tinged with melancholy (probably shoulda put it with the sabigiyuu playlist lmao)

i see you, you see me - how pleasant, this feeling - the moment you hold me - i missed you, im sorry - ive given what I have - i showed you I'm growing - the ashes fall slowly - as your voice consoles me only alive in his dreams, the reprieve of being in sabito's arms hurts from its fleeting nature. his chance at trying to right his wrongs of being too weak, a demon's dying ashes as proof, sabito's voice (a faded memory of, distorted with unfamiliarity) telling him he doesnt need to prove himself of anything

as the hours pass - i will let you know - that i need to ask - before I'm alone - how it feels to rest - on your patient lips  - to eternal bliss - im so glad to know the false feeling of lips against his, only as good as a dream gets. (he knows it isnt real, it doesnt feel real, its heaven nonetheless) a kiss that never happened, never will happen, hes just happy to have known him at all (even if the memories are so painful)

we're swaying to drum beats - in motion, im feeling - my patience controlling - the question, i wont speak two hearts in sync as their sword swings, giyuu always holds his tounge until the perfect moment (a perfect moment doesnt exist)

we're telling the stories - our laughter, he knows me - we're leaving, we're talking - youre closer, it's calming reliving faded memories- happy times and the march to their shared grave. the impeding dread of Knowing simmers to an empty lull when their hands brush as they walk

the night will hold us close and the stars will guide us home - ive been waiting for this moment, we're finally alone - i turn to ask the question, so anxious, my thoughts a calm rest with another painful dream of a man that doesnt exist

your lips were soft like winter, in your passion, i was lost their lips meet, painfully cold and oh so dead against his, only for a moment. he opens his eyes to the crystal clear memory of the determined fire behind rounded eyes before he turned. white haori disappearing to the forest, vision blurred, red trailed down his face, what was he supposed to do now?

-------

Little Dark Age is super gloomy and sorta like. corrupted church vibes. idk how to explain that. the tone of voice singing keeping the note flat (except in the chorus) the background music echoing itself it just overall reminds me of devilman crybaby's corrupted demonic vibe. Smells Blood(kensuke ushio). dvmcb has a more Taken And Run By Evil/Satan kinda vibe whereas little dark age is more God Left Us

the lyrics are a narration, his own thoughts and feelings he never speaks aloud but says if you listen close enough.

the ruins of the day, painted with a scar dont need to explain that one

and, the more i straighten out, the less it wants to try the amount of willpower it takes him to just keep going

oh-oh, forgiving who you are, for what you stand to gain - just know that if you hide, it doesnt go away/i grieve in stereo, the stereo sounds strange - you know that if it hides, it doesn't go away self-narration, how much he still hurts despite hardening his heart against it all

when you get out of bed, dont end up stranded - horrified. with each stone. on the stage - my little dark age stranded in the stagelight, stone upon stone tied to him always weighing him down

specifically ties with the other lyric- come find us heading for the bridge, bring a stone, all the rage, my little dark age he thinks he deserves it, peoples hatred and anger at his failure, he ties the stones himself

if I get out of bed, you'll see me standing all alone, horrified, on the stage, my little dark age all of this song ties specifically to this one imagery i have of sabito and giyuu and hashira overall- theyre the ones that bare the light that destroys demons. with their strength they cast shadows for other slayers and innocent people to hide behind, still safely in the light but not being burned by it as they are.

Giyuu and Sabito were supposed to bare that light together, strengthened by eachother casting shadows where the other's weakest and baring the burn with eachother side by side, they were supposed to cast a shadow large enough to shield everyone they cared for, to not lose everyone they love again.

this line was the start of it all- waking up alone on the stage being wholly burned by the light with no respite. the blinding light instead signaling his little dark age

also yeah!!! the self-isolating, lonely theme of those songs is literally just Him. it speaks for itself so clearly i dont even know how i could explain it to someone who knows giyuu but doesnt understand how The Mute & The Missing Road relate to him. its just. Its Him man. you gotta believe me. if you only listen with your ears, i cant get in - and a heart always holds, onto missing roads MAN CMON ITS RIGHT THERE-

#tomioka giyuu #loserboy giyuu posting #fratboy sabito posting #i think giyuu in regards to sabito puts him on a pedestal. worships him as a god and says he'll never compare to. devoted to a fault. #also i dont like how much i Dont think of tsutako w these songs bc she was literally The Start of it. she was his everything and she gave #her all for his wellbeing and it just set him to believe he didnt fucking deserve it. his life shouldnt have costed *hers* in his #eyes and that shaped his attitude towards himself for the rest of his life #also just now realizing i have Slow Doown(crx) in giyuucore and Hurry Hurry(air traffic controller) in sabitocore #BRO ITS FUCKING- #dude #'ooh im gonna miss something - if i keep bumping - the most significant stuff #all my friends and all the loose ends - and this love of mine- cause im running out of time' #'who am i? am i still the same guy? or have i lost something as i keep stomping #mind and health - every bit of myself - i ignore the signs as im running out of time' #'a year goes by - you wonder why - not much is done - youve run too much - in parallel - now hurry hurry is your hell' #vs #'when i see you speeding by - all i do is wave goodbye - i wish i could buy some time - enough to get it right #oh slow down - slow down - slow down - oh slow down - slow down - slow down' #the juxtaposition #sabito needing to do as much as he possibly can with the people he cares about to feel like they did enough together #giyuu needing the people he cares about to slow down and just savor & bask in the time they have together #both of them feeling like the time they share with others are limited- yet going about it in completely different ways #both wanting to be able to do something about it- but sabito pushing himself to do it all to the point it kills him while giyuu #pushes himself but never truly believes it'll amount to anything worthwhile #-------nsfw further tags------- #also find it exceedingly amusing that it fits my giyuu overstim kink & sabito denial kink hc<3 #sabito's great at keeping it going while giyuu knows how to drag it out~ theyr perfect 4 eachother<3<3 #man im *really* bad at not making everything about sabigiyuu lmao

[vvanessaives]

no pairing in the world will ever serve as much cunt as a courier x benny one, i will die with this truth in my heart

#rena.txt #benny is bi btw you can try and tear away from me this notion but i will bring it with me in the grave #like it might be my bias for my moira/benny but like the insanity of it all makes me delirious. #this guy in a fucking checkered suit talking all weird puts a bullet through the couriers head but he's so fail cringe that they survive an #now they are hunting him down. like for me the funny thing with moira is that it's all a matter of obsession. you saw me put benny under #enemy & lover in that template but lord is it all in her head. like she wakes up after a near death experience with half of her memories #lost and pre-incident moira would've tried to get the package back only out of spite but in this case it's simply bc..she is missing a #purpose now. she doesn't remember any family or friend or personal desire beside the fact she was there to deliver a package and she doesnt #even know what's inside. retriving is the only purpose to keep on living now. that and revenge which leads to obsession. but along the way #as she discovers piece after piece of benny. retracing the road that lead him to her..obsession gets more and more intense and suddenly #he's like a lover to her like they just had a silly little lovers quarrel that ended with a bullet. and it's all in her head and ofc ALL on #sided like the only interaction is the canon meeting at the tops that leads to the canon fucking akfjskf (again very silly cringe fail of #benny to even accept fucking the person he thought he killed. i love him) and it's like. the whole road she did with this idea of meeting #him and love (lmao) but he's there now and she can't kill the revengeful part of her obsession and for a second it's all like a dream. THE #dream that lived so long in her head. the ILLUSION. but now it's all so real and the Only end here is his death and she doesn't avoid it. #she embraces it she's HAPPY to kill him to have her revenge but the obsession..the obsession never leaves. now that he dies what's left? #and what about all the lil movies of them (insane) she played in her mind? so she's crying and laughing at the same time now in a mixture o #euphoria for finally taking tf out from the world that piece of shit and pain for the end of her little mind-movie. a fight between #irreality and reality. her illusions and the cold dead body resting next to hers. #i could eviscerate this concept forever just know i love my insane lil gal

[busaikuknee]

today was a really good day

#cleaned my apartment did laundry made a little food #one of my irl friends and i have been trying to hang out for like. two months. but conflicting work schedules means it hasn't worked out #but we finally both had a free day! she came over to watch the ppv and it was so much fun we fucking lost our minds at the coffin match #idk man. not to be too hashtag real here on tumblr dot com but this winter has been a little rough and like #being able to share this with her and hear about the things that she's been passionate about lately immediately made me feel human again #i love my friends both irl and online

[butchfeygela]

i miss my ex. i want to talk to her. my alters want sto talk to her alters. ive been free from her for longer than i was even w her at this point and i still rapidly cycle between missing her and hating her

#she was my best friend i want tht back #yesbshe tried to kill me and turned our polycule into a sex drug cult and i lost my mind #her birthday is next week #i want to text her so badly #or maybe i would text Rae who we made a side fb for so i could message him when we were together #i wonder if shed even see the notif on Raes account #does rae miss me. i was the only person he loved and cared for and wanted to be with. we never got to say goodbye #i should be allowed to reach out its been fucking years #nikanie

[schisms]

#lost my fucking mind when i saw this #i’ve been getting back into warriors and i googled her to look up. something…. #something in her background idk and then THIS happened #bluestar….the large bigfoot like toxic mutant #also Why Does It List Thrushpelt As Her Significant Other #Let Men And Women Be Good Friends And Nothing More Challenge

[ilikebirdsouo]

Warning: birds is very very angry rn so warning for cussing and caps

I HAD TO COUNT 260 INDIVIDUAL PEICES OF PAPER- I AM NOT FUCKING HAPPY RIGHT NOW-

I’m so mad I’m so mad I’m so mad I’m so mad I’m so mad I’m so mad I’m so-

#AND!!!! AND!!!!!!! THE PARTNER WHO WAS SUPPOSED TO BE DOING THIS WITH ME? HA!! HAHAHAHA SHE DITCHED!!! #and I SAW HER IN THE HALLS JUST BEFIRE THIS CLASS- I AM SO DONE WITH HER RIGHT NOW- #I LOST COUNT OVER 90 TIMES AND NOT INLY THAT BUT I ALSO HAD TO THROW A PAPER 34 TIMES AND COUNT THE INDIVIDUAL PAPERS- #-IT LANDED ON- THIRTY. FOUR. TIMES. WITH TWO. HUNDRED. SIXTY. SMALL PAPERS- #my anger is immeasurable :))))))))) #Dearest friend who thought it would be so nice to ditch this class period I hope your time was lovely while I LOST MY FUCKING MIND- #duck rants #tw cussing #tw caps