#Many thoughts. Head full.

[starlit-mansion]

there's a few other salient points on video essays that require some reflection, and there's not exclusively thoughts that were only sparked by the plagiarism video.

one is, obviously, that there's no particular quality control in video essays. which like. we all know. i've been led down the garden path many a time myself. i actually don't watch many video essays about my actual interests because i usually find myself disagreeing with them, either because i know the places where info was cherrypicked and find it irritating (i have a problem with hbomb's very old video essay about undertale for that very reason. he ignores the fact that undyne is actually interested in the same things as alphys to support his overall thesis. i know WHY he did it, but also. this is why fans of the games he covers are pissed off about him creating a narrative among non-fans who think they understand everything from watching 2-6 hours of video essay) or because i fundamentally disagree with the takeaway about the subject (for example... a certain very overstuffed, tangent filled video essay about the mcelroy media empire). I know a lot of other people openly talk about how eagerly they consume video essays on subjects they know nothing about. It is important to at least leave space for the idea that a video essay is -- at bare minimum -- on the level of suspicion of a wiki article.

The other thing is that often we have these things on in the background, passively absorbing them. we don't check sources, or even look at the screen at times. I do this literally CONSTANTLY, and to be honest. i'm probably not going to change. BUT i will say, this is a place where you can actually get a broader take on the video essay, even if it's just comfy noise. you can start listening for the personal essay aspect of the video essay. for people to talk about how the subject effects them, or what they think is the extrapolation is. that's where the art of them lives. you can see a stark difference between people who structure them LIKE AN ESSAY, with a segment at the end that restates and synthesizes the thesis, and people who summarize something because they've made a job of summarizing things.

#many thoughts. head full.

[ragecndybars]

Persona 3 AU where Tartarus contains Shadow Selves a la Persona 4 (and you have to confront yours before you're able to summon your Persona).

The fact that most Persona-users are detected by the existing members of S.E.E.S. and recruited, rather than just ending up in Tartarus by circumstance, would mean that the existence of Shadow selves would be a pretty big asterisk on the joining paperwork, lmao. Imagine the opening "join us and save the world" speech in Persona 3, except Mitsuru is also like *cough* alsoyouhavetofaceyourshadowself *cough*

However, it could be argued that, since they have prior warning and have to actively choose to step into Tartarus the first time, knowing that they'll be facing their Shadow (and also because they aren't getting kidnapped and trapped in a strange land in the process), the SEES members would have an altogether less traumatizing time of it than the IT members.

I feel like most of them could even resist the impulse to deny their Shadows (although, to be honest, I don't think that would hold true for all of them, if only because it's a very high-stress situation to be placed in, and I think asking high schoolers to be perfectly rational when confronted with the physical form of their own deepest darkest secrets is pretty silly lmao).

I also wonder whether or not the Kirijo group would've known for certain how to handle Shadow selves prior to the initial formation of SEES. Obviously Mitsuru has accepted hers, but that was when she was a child, and she was the only example of an awakened Persona user they had for a while. Maybe Akihiko and Shinjiro were forced to confront their Shadows with no prior warning... which could have contributed to Shinjiro's eventual decision to leave.

Assorted character specific headcanons of mine are as follows:

Minato/Makoto and Hamuko/Kotone don't have Shadows, but just call their Personas without ever meeting one, just like P4 Protag. This probably contributes to Mitsuru's decision to make them temporary field leaders, as well as to Junpei's initial jealousy of them ("you're telling me those jerks didn't have to face a manifestation of their deepest insecurities in front of all the cool kids?!"). (Also their Shadows could make an appearance later if this were a hurt/comfort fic >:3c)

Yukari's initial discomfort with Mitsuru is heightened because Mitsuru witnessed her initial encounter with her Shadow, whereas no one on the team knows anything about what Mitsuru's Shadow was like since she awakened years before the rest of them. I feel like Yukari's Shadow would probably be kind of bitchy and would talk shit about Mitsuru while idolizing Yukari's dad in a really over-the-top way (which would only further the divide between them early-game...).

On one hand, I think it would be interesting if Junpei had to face his Shadow in front of Minato and Yukari the first time they all go to Tartarus together... on the other hand, I think Mitsuru and Akihiko would want to take Junpei aside and have him face his Shadow beforehand with relative privacy. Either way, Junpei's Shadow would probably be similar to Yosuke's, in that it claims Junpei doesn't give a shit about helping people and is just in it for the temporary self-esteem boost.

Fuuka's situation would actually be the closest to a Persona 4 character's situation since she ended up in Tartarus alone and confused against her will... What if the Emperor and Empress bosses that the others initially can't fight were replaced with Fuuka's Shadow, similar to how Rise's can detect your attacks at first in P4? Also poor Fuuka I get so emotional just thinking about her canon story 😭 Shadow Fuuka I think would be loud and call herself pathetic, going on and on about how she can't do anything for herself and she just rolls over for people so that they'll be nice to her (based on some dialogue Fuuka has when she joins SEES)

My idea for this is that Shadow Selves only appear in Tartarus, so they didn't exist prior to its formation. Therefore, what if... Aigis initially never had a Shadow... but one suddenly appears when she's having her whole existential crisis near the end of the game... 😳 Shadow Aigis going on and on about being nothing more than a machine meant to destroy and having no capacity for love or friendship...

Akihiko met his Shadow pre-canon and probably doesn't really want to talk about it (it for sure taunted him about being too pathetic to save Miki, and other than that was probably just unhinged and consumed by a driveless lust for power)

Shinjiro met his pre-canon as well. I like the idea that neither Mitsuru nor Akihiko saw it, and he never told either of them what it said... but whatever it was, it clearly shook him to his core, and almost definitely contributed to his issues with controlling Castor.

Shadow Mitsuru... cold and emotionless, exactly the way she tries to portray herself in order to keep people at a distance... oh, and Shadow Mitsuru was for sure mouthing off about how at least she got to live a luxurious life coasting on her grandfather's blood money~

Shadow Ken. Absolutely seething with rage. Openly and obviously murderous. Both because it's a side of himself he's unwilling to face and also because it's a side of himself that he's perfectly willingly to accept and admit. Discuss.

No Shadow Koromaru because he's perfect just the way he is. (Junpei voice "The DOG gets off scott free TOO?!")

I've gone back and forth on my idea for how Strega would work in this AU but I've become attached to the idea that they never got a chance to manifest and properly accept their Shadows, since they were implanted with their Personas artificially, so their Personas kind of still are Shadows, which repeatedly reappear and taunt them, making their conditions worse whenever they deny them...

No further thoughts. Thank you for your time everyone. (If any of y'all have further ideas (or different thoughts on what the SEES kids' Shadows would look like) I would LOVE to hear them...)

#Persona 3 #P3 #Minato Arisato #Hamuko Arisato #Kotone Shiomi #Yukari Takeba #Junpei Iori #Akihiko Sanada #Fuuka Yamagishi #Mitsuru Kirijo #Shinjiro Aragaki #Ken Amada #went back and forth on whether or not to tag the characters #decided that i should #many thoughts. head full. #wait #Makoto Yuki #Minako Arisato #there

[thychesters]

eheuheuhe now once i finish skypiea and want to write fic i can write from robin’s pov

#do i know anything about her backstory and other motivations! irrelevant! #many thoughts. head full. #gonna be sailing on the merry when usopp’s like hey where’s luffy? and robin says hang on 👀 #followed by a shriek because robin why is there an eyeball in the wall #this all makes absolute perfect sense to me #kate blabs

[thewordsofthedivine]

BIG thoughts on the ending, since I beat the game yesterday; under the cut due to spoilers. Obviously.

The Lamb slowly walking up to The One Who Waits feels like a parallel to their sacrifice. And it does in fact turn out to be one, as The One Who Waits immediately turns their back on them and demands they give the Red Crown - and their life - to Him.

Lamb is broken by this betrayal. They've given everything they could to Him - they've broken His chains, they've given Him sacrifices, they've spread His word throughout the Lands of the Old Faith.

And yet here He stands, demanding their life. Just like the Bishops of the Old Faith did.

They don't know what to do anymore. The hurt washes over them as they hold the Red Crown close, broken tears rolling down their face. They can't even bring themselves to speak, just shaking their head in a silent "No".

And then, hurt...turns to rage.

A liar, that's what He was. Stringing them along with promises of a new life and vengeance for the ones they had lost - only to discover that they were nothing more than a pawn to Him.

The Red Crown saved them. It gave them a choice. After so many years of feeling helpless, It gave them the strength to free themselves from the hell they were trapped in.

And who was He to take it from them, when He had revealed Himself to be exactly like their old captors?

That hatred builds up in their chest, coming out in the form of a guttural scream.

"I am no longer your servant." They want to say, as the Red Crown transforms into their weapon of choice.

"And you are no longer my God."

With that, the cycle of suffering ends - no more Bishops to prey on the weak, no more power to The One Who Waits that'll allow Him to take more innocent lives.

The Old Faith is gone.

The New Faith has taken its place, lead by The Lamb, who will ensure that no more genocidal sacrifices will be made under their watch.

And The One Who Waits is helping, too. He's just super bitter about it.

#cult of the lamb spoilers #cotl spoilers #spoilers #MANY THOUGHTS. HEAD FULL. #(slaps roof of The Cult of The Lamb) This game can fit so many metaphors for the cycle of abuse and corruption of religion in it!! #and its protagonist can fit so many metaphors for PTSD and religious trauma in it!! #I KNEW I WAS GONNA RELATE TO THIS GAME #//long post #// long post #edit: why is this flow of consciousness post better than anything I'll ever write lmao

[mellow-elbow]

Wait you dont work at the laundromat anymore? Did you get to throw your shitty coworker through the window?

unfortunately no I literally walked in for a shift and some random dude who worked at a different type of store the owner ALSO owns/runs that I had never seen/met before told me I was being let go so I gave him my key and got the fuck out. I’m free.

Now I do laundry for the local tourist train my mom works for, so right now I’m the solo laundry person for the Polar Express. No coworkers. No customers. No extra duties if I can’t physically handle them. No ableist coworkers/managers/bosses. Just me and laundry baby.

#still have no idea why I was ‘let go’ idrc I’m glad I’m out that bih #AND I make more money per hour AND I work less days in November atm #in December the schedule is gonna crank into high gear and I’ll die but I’m free #and there’s only one washer and dryer to clean/maintain #so while I have one load going I can do whatever else I gotta do and use my free time for ART #many thoughts. head full. #fuck you cindy fuck you jeff I’m free I’m sexy this building has good AC/heat #GARGLE MY CAWK AND BALLZ 💗💗💗 #justlaundrythings

[ahsokryze]

ughhhhhhhh why do i relate to obi-wan kenobi so goddamn much?

am i truly destined to become a hermit?

*screams into the void*

#i… yeah #currently reading ‘padawan’ #i just. #many thoughts. head full. #obi wan kenobi #me

[bisexualgaledekarios]

bobby going more salt and pepper again

#many thoughts. head full.

[stephensondheim]

HARROWING!! life shattering realization that identifying with Louis Ironson is the gay person version of identifying with the joker

#lithy speaks #MAYBE HES NOT SO GOOD WITH DEATH YOUR HONOR!!!!!!! #im watching an aia video essay and theyre just tearing louis to shreds #theyre like and heres how he becomes a less likeable character with every scene for abandoning prior in his time of need <3 #like BESTIE we literally dont even leave the funeral from the opening scene by the time we establish that hes got internal conflict!!!!!!!! #is this my american psycho identifier moment?? #many thoughts. head full. #socratic seminar on this: me. my dad who committed suicide and gave me both abandonment trauma and insane death anxiety. tony kushner.

[awildtei]

I know this is not new information, but I've seen a fresh wave of people confused about what the fuck Andrew planned to do as a 5'0 man with a knife against the literal mafia, so.

I think the fact that neither Neil nor Kevin lost their faith in Andrew’s ability to protect them after he was attacked by Drake (unable to stand his ground against a single man with a bottle, let alone the Yakuza/Nathan with their guns) is the best proof we have that the deal was never about physical protection. This is confirmed by the way Neil never expects Andrew to save him from his father, in fact cuts him loose before Baltimore as soon as danger is truly near.

Andrew is a pretty self-aware character, and he wouldn't make promises he knows he can't possibly see through, so I think he knows what Kevin and Neil also know: what they need from him, and thus what he promises, is not physical protection.

To Kevin, he promises safety from the Moriyamas, and the way we see him enact that safety (at Kathy's show, at the banquet) shows exactly what it's about: when Riko starts getting into your head, when he makes you doubt yourself, makes you think maybe you should go back to Evermore, I won't let you. I will get you away from him, I will treat him like he's just some dude to remind you that you can face him without kneeling. I will be your spine until you find your own, I will stand my ground for you until you can do it yourself.

That's why the scene when Kevin gets to the dorm with his tattoo and Andrew's eyes show so much feeling is huge not just for Kevin but for Andrew: because that was the whole point of their deal, Kevin has found his spine, Andrew bought him the space and time to do it.

To Neil, he promises safety from the people hunting him down, and that means: I will give you something to build a life around (keys, drives to nightly exy practices, someone to lean on, someone who will listen without flinching). When you feel like running, I will be someone you can call to come pick you up. When you forget, I will remind you who you are: Neil Abram Josten.

Andrew stands between Kevin and Riko and between Neil and his father not as an impenetrable wall but as an obstacle in their vision: not shield but focal point.

(Makes me think of that scene in The Haunting of Hill House, Hugh holding Steven's neck to keep him from looking at the ghosts, saying, Look at me, just look at me, keep your eyes on me. That's what Andrew’s constantly doing --even literally, when Kevin is spiralling after Wymack tells the team about the district change and Andrew makes him look away from his broken hand and up at him).

#aftg #all for the game #andrew minyard #neil josten #kevin day #andreil #many thoughts head full #tei's

[almond-tofuuu]

Life with Zayne

❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️

An aesthetic

this man has taken over my life someone pls help, he's all I think about-

#zayne #love and deepspace #zayne love and deepspace #zayne aesthetic #this is a serious problem #he's so #i love him #no thoughts just him #no one look at me #head full #many thoughts #all of them him #i am down horrendous #delulu

[zhonglicious]

cw. size kink, breeding kink, oral (f. receiving), fingering (f. receiving), implied overstimulation, lmk if i forgot any!

"c'mon baby, gimme one more."

he groans, lips pressed against your clit and your legs over his shoulders. one of his hands is occupied with fingering you, the pads of his ring and middle fingers massaging the spot he knows drives you insane.

his cock is just too big for you, and he has to make you cum at least once just so he can finally put it in. not that he's complaining, of course. he loves making you cum on his tongue and the feeling of your hands pulling at his hair, almost as much as he loves the feeling of your cunt around his cock. almost.

when he finally thinks you're ready, it takes all his willpower not to just slide all of it in immediately. you're so wet, folds easily parting and letting him in. but he can't. he knows he's big and he doesn't want to hurt you but god, is it fucking hard to hold back when he can feel the way your cunt is sucking him in.

slowly, inch by inch, he manages to sheath himself fully and oh, god... his head is spinning with the whimper you make as the head nudges against your sweet spot, your eyes glossy with tears because it just feels so good. he wants to give you a few seconds or minutes to adjust. really, he does.

but when you gasp and tell him "s' so big..." while you press against your lower stomach and look up at him with hearts in your eyes... all his patience and restraint goes out the window because he can't think of anything else other than stuffing you full of his cum.

sighhh. big men who try to be patient and gentle but still end up making you sore with how much they want to fuck a baby into you.

BAJI, draken, TAIJU, kakucho, mucho, daichi, USHIJIMA, KUROO, iwaizumi, kunigami, + any of ur favs!!

#if this doesnt make sense im sorry i wrote this in a daze. #no thoughts head empty #or well too many thoughts head full??? #who knows atp man #tokyo rev smut #baji smut #draken smut #kakucho smut #taiju smut #mucho smut #haikyuu smut #daichi smut #ushijima smut #kuroo smut #iwaizumi smut #blue lock smut #kunigami smut #rin smut #jujutsu kaisen smut

[blewthecandleout]

I watched Catherine called Birdy and have so many thoughts about it wtf wtf.....

#the way joe/uncle george is like. closeted? #going to the crusades aka being at sea... #and then his marriage to the milf? who he didnt love? but just bevause it mutually benefits them? #HELLO.... #many thoughts. head full. #catherine called birdy #i know lena dunham kinda sucks but she directs a good queer motif-filled film idk what can i say #also just the entirety of birdy being like. what is a woman #not wanting to grow up and be a lady and literally hating all men except her gay uncle and best friend #HI HELLO.....

[yrsonpurpose]

RED, WHITE & ROYAL BLUE (2023) Can you take a walk with me?

#rwrbedit #rwrb #red white and royal blue #alex claremont diaz #henry fox mountchristen windsor #rwrbgifs #mine* #no but this is also another underrated scene... #how henry was already walking towards him #but instantly grabs his hand AND arm when he can see alex is stressed #and the protectiveness ahhh so many thoughts head full #rwrb spoilers

[garbagestarr]

the tiktokification of grunge is ruining my life

#many thoughts. head full.

[sctumsempra]

androgynous summer snape but make them sleepy!!!

#severus snape #snape #pro snape #snape fanart #procreate #sketch #he’s always exhausted/tired/sleepy regardless of how much he sleeps 2me #the vibes of napping in the living room because it’s the coolest room in your old house are unmatched #girl help i’m projecting onto him again #reached the point of having so many thoughts about him where i end up mentally the meme of patrick star with a board nailed to his head #he deserves a full afternoon couch nap in an oversized t shirt and pajama shorts idc

[willowser]

bakugou watches the news while washing the dishes.

muted, because he wouldn't be able to hear the weatherman over the faucet, anyway, and his brow is furrowed in concentration — at both his hands and the forecast for next week. behind him on the stove the kettle warms and you eye it lazily, jumping back and forth from it to the way bakugou's muscles shift beneath his shirt as he scrubs.

sometimes it amazes you, the strength he's built within his body — the broad span of his shoulders as he rolls them, sleeves almost too tight for his biceps, and the rest of the material hangs loose on his body, swaying off his tiny waist as he swaps weight from one foot to the other — but you know it hasn't come easy; even now, from where you're sitting, the heavy, pink scarring on his cheek is visible when he tips his head down.

you stand quietly, shuffling across the tile of the kitchen until you're close enough to wrap your arms around him. bakugou says nothing as you press your cheek into his back, only peeking over his shoulder when you press a gentle kiss into his soft cotton tee.

"thank you for spoiling me," you murmur, nuzzling further into him when you receive only a grunt, one you feel more than hear. "the food was really good, sweetie-pea."

the silly name makes him snort and he shakes his head when you hum, amused. dinner has made you full and tired and you lean a little further into him than you maybe should, though if he minds at all, he doesn't show it. instead he just sighs, breath stuttering when you slip your hands under the loose material to gently run over his stomach. just like you, he's soft, a tummy full of food, but it's not long before his abdomen is contracting, muscles suddenly tight under your touch.

you laugh quietly into his shoulder, holding back the urge to bite him. "are you flexing, tough guy?"

"shuddup," he grumbles, shifting his weight once more. "...bein' fuckin' touchy."

at that you inch closer, now purposely much too in his space — and yet he still doesn't push you away. around his shoulder, you watch him run a soapless plate under the water for almost two minutes before his focus returns and he moves on, and then you do bite him, because you can't help it.

bakugou hisses and jerks away when your teeth sink into his bicep, flushed face made more obvious as he turns to glare down at you. before he can get a word in, you kiss him in the center of his chest, over the scars of his heart, and offer him a sweet smile.

"love you,"

his eyes dart away on instinct, embarrassed, but he's been working on his vulnerability; his lips twist once before he's pressing them into your hairline, leaning back against you in return as the kettle starts to squeal.

"drink your tea, woman," he grunts, nuzzling into you the tiniest bit before letting you free. "love you, too."

#cant proofread phone at 2% #i've been thinking about this exact scenario for two days now #get OUT of my HEAD #domestic bakugou 🥺 tummy full of food 🥺 #this is so self indulgent he would hate me LOL #i use too many pet names and cant help being too touchy idk #bakugou drabble #✿ willow writes #✿ thoughts: bakugou #✿ theme: domestic bakugou