Dr. John Lockhart-Mummery (1875-1957), a pioneering expert in proctology, nicknamed "King Rectum"
...Lockhart-Mummery was such a giant in his profession that he could publicly articulate something that had been known in the profession but never stated, out of concerns for decency: “Anything that can be inserted into the human rectum has been inserted into the human rectum.”
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Prompt 87
“Mother, I crave violence.”
Danny paused in the middle of his work, turning off the torch as he turned towards Dan. Who had once again be de-aged for destroying a world a few years before. (Ellie had cackled for hours about her being the older sibling now) The currently-six year old was scowling, definitely not pouting.
He raised an eyebrow, setting his tools down. “Jordan, we’re literally in an assassin’s den right now-” Honestly running into someone he’d met in his time-traveling was rather interesting, apparently his old rival had become so ecto-contaminated that he was immortal now. “-and I know you just got out of sparring, so are you really ‘craving violence’ or are you just bored?”
Dan pouted, sorry, he scowled. “Your ‘friend’s’ kids kept tryin’ to copy me and got in the way.” He hopped up onto one of the chairs, visibly not happy about not being able to fly as he glared at tiny legs. Tough shit, he knew better than to destroy worlds, they couldn’t always reverse time.
Danny sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “They’re just trying to play-” Maybe to a human they wouldn’t, but honestly everyone here was so liminal they were probably closer to ghosts than anyone except for Amity. Which had also been displaced in time after getting dragged to the ghost zone, so it had been soaked in ecto longer anyway.
“They got in the way and I almost stabbed Dusan!” Dan whined, despite what he’d insist. “At least Elnath can go intangible and Nyssa can dodge!” Ah, that was the issue. He’d been worried.
“Little sunbeam, you don’t have to worry,” Danny soothed, scooping up the ghostling. Even though he had been an adult, the chemicals in the brain and body were still that of a child’s. A young child at that. “The trainers are there to keep an accident from happening.”
Not to mention that he was rather confident that between Ras and himself they could keep any injuries to minor ones. Sam would have loved to meet him, Danny thinks. Honestly they would have been best friends, but Sam was off on another world on a mission to collect every plant in existence, so good for her, and Tucker was back in the reincarnation cycle.
Oh well, at least he wasn’t waiting for them alone, and maybe Dan having more siblings would help stop another timeline-breaking accident from happening.
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inspired by veil
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i'm aware the requests are closed so don't feel pressured or anything but your "my desire to write sololuci smut" tag awoke something within me. solomon getting punished by lucifer for being annoying... solomon subbing for lucifer in exchange for a pact... solomon noticing lucifer's stress and helps him out... old man yaoi now and forever...
NSFW MDNI
(nothing too explicit but obviously much discussion of smut so)
ANON PLEASE. I love old man yaoi so much 😭
Ah yes I left that tag on the art of Solomon in shibari because HELLO. How could that not inspire smut scenarios, you know what I mean??
I still can't believe they paired these two up for the April Fool's thing, like I know you're saying they're gonna fight each other, but you can't stop me from imagining it full of the sexual tension we all know would be there!
Right, anyway...
Lucifer is an interesting character when it comes to sexy times. He certainly enjoys punishment in a non sexy kind of way lol.
But Solomon is such a silly guy, like I really think he'd just find it funny. He does stuff on purpose to get Lucifer to punish him because he thinks it's amusing. Lucifer would get soooo frustrated.
Now subbing for a pact is interesting because I personally headcanon both of them as switches. So now I'm just imagining Solomon subbing for Lucifer, securing the pact, and then they switch roles. Because now Solomon can actually command Lucifer through the pact, you know? And Lucifer wants to sub so bad, he just wouldn't be able to admit it at first. Well, that's just my opinion anyway lol.
Okay and now the stress situation is interesting too!! Because Lucifer has a problem with being a workaholic and I just know Solomon would pick up on it in a way others might not. Cue him cornering Luci at RAD in an empty classroom so he can use his mouth to relieve some of that pent up stress~ Lucifer protests but in the end he gives in and comes completely undone. They exit the room with Lucifer blushing but looking more relaxed and Solomon's hair sticking up all over the place because Luci couldn't keep his hands out of it.
AUGH. You guys have GOT to stop feeding this brain rot (and by you guys I mean anons and certain mutuals who know who they are lol ily) (and also by stop I mean keep going). I am completely on the solulu train now and I won't be free until I write some legit fics about them. Prepare yourselves because at this point I can guarantee it's gonna happen.
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him in white....
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There's a field at the far end of the local apple orchards, that has a public footpath running through it. We don't often go down there as it's off our usual little circuit but occasionally, for a change, we'll head over & explore. Last summer, the farmer had planted the field with sunflowers & you could walk through them. It was lovely, very pretty.
We'd not ventured there so far this summer & I was curious what was now growing in the Far Field, cause I could see it wasn't a regular crop, like wheat, or potatoes but I couldn't tell from a distance what it was.
So, today, we down to have a closer look. It's thistles! The entire field is a big old thistle forest. It's buzzing. Literally. So many bees!! There are stacks of bee hives up in the orchards & I'm guessing the thistles (& some other types of flowers, sprinkled among them) have been planted to provide food for pollinators?
Anyway, once I realised the field was a mass of prickly plants & stinging insects, I didn't feel overly enthused about walking down the very overgrown footpath. However, Flynn remembered there's a stream at the other end & he was determined to have a paddle, so off we went down a tunnel of thistles.
Flynn was fine - he's short enough to avoid the worst of the spikes & most of the bees. I followed very gingerly. Got scratched & prickled & poked by the plants but all I can say is that it's a good job our local bee population appears to be quite docile & relaxed about life because I definitely headbutted at least few of them on the way through & nobody stung me! So that was our Sunday afternoon adventure!
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i have figured out how to put my erotica under a read more! rejoice!
blessed are the meek
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Frankie Boyle on The Last Leg, discussing Scottish Parliamentarian Kate Forbes.
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Obey Me: LeviathanxMC
The Bet (Rated M/E)
Summary:
It's the day of the Fangol Game, and you and Levi are rooting for opposite sides. He has a special request if his team wins...and if you win? Well, the reward will be just as sweet...
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I blame you for this
This is absolutely cursed content and I can't believe you would inflict this upon me! :P
You know... given how the comic ends, with Hob being the last person to "see" Morpheus... oh god I can't go through that again. Please for the love of Gaiman, don't put us through that again!
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honestly teaser is a pure pain, but also made me kind of optimistic about permanence of Gerard situationship — nothing truly good can be build on so much heartbreak.
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okay I am not a Gamer™ and I have absolutely learned that if I just hang tight eventually a AAA game will absolutely go on sale for 90% off and it may be 8 years later but WHAT DO I CARE, I'm playing Ocarina of Time for the first time ever.
Which is to say, aha, I'm not dropping $60 on the Sexy DND RPG for my very own, not even for PC mods, ah. No.
HOWEVER.
Hi can I please just have unlimited access to the character builder, it's like the best doll maker ever thank u.
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I offer u my game on notes
I may make this comic someday but idk when
Starts with Snaps and Kelek at the end of a date and walking down the street. Snaps shoes are untied and Kelek ends up stepping on one of his laces (which he may have done on purpose).
So Kelek’s like “omg snaps ur the worst with tiring ur shoes” and is just. He’s not great at not being suspicious. Especially when he just kinda grins at the look Snaps gives him.
So he’s like “here I got this joke, you should read it to me while I tie your shoes” and a moment later Snaps gets a text with said joke. Kelek’s obviously prepared.
I imagine him just having the stupidest sneaky kitty face. And Snaps obviously knowing something’s up but plays along anyway.
He sent Snaps a version of this very long winded joke. Link
When Snaps is done and possibly snorts bc of what a dumb fucking joke that was he is met with Kelek also laughing and then promptly
Honking him right in the dick
Before scurrying away. In the time it took Snaps to read the joke (and willfully ignore Kelek ‘tieing his shoes’) Kelek has changed into one of his ‘play’ outfits.
He slaps his ass and tells Snaps he bet he can’t catch him and takes off.
When Snaps gives chase he prompty falls face first into the perfectly placed backpack Kelek left behind to make sure Snaps didn’t actually get hurt in the fall.
Kelek did tie his shoelaces! … together :3
Snaps belongs to @didderd; these are my own thoughts and takes :)
I just love these two sm
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Only Friends 🤝 Naughty Babe
Trying to violate Tumblr's community guidelines
Like srsly Thai ql industry needs to do something about their Naming Series' teams. What is this unprompted 18+ sounding names dhdhjkdsavh
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