green/blue stimboard for a computer/robot!!
row 1: buttons, astronauts/robots, robot hand.
row 2: blue keyboard, ms paint, green keyboard.
row 3: computer, machine, computer.
divider from @/animatedglittergraphics-n-more
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I actually misremembered who made the suggestion; this is @heyyoufriendthere (orange⬇️)'s fault. Plaintext with annotations below the cut.
This is the very picture of an intellectual rights fracas
Comics will warp to be like films as fast as you can say "huzzah"
But when a megamonopoly swallows up the competition
It yanks our blorbos back and forth in an ugly retcon perdition
When only Fox can make a movie about the Fantastic Four,
The Disney-owned comic office will shove the Four right out the door
Until the Disney studio absorbs those rights and then you'll find
The comics are suddenly awful sorry they left them behind(1)
Then in the instant comic fans begin to cheer an awful lot
The news comes in from Bleeding Cool(2) the writer is that fucker Slott(3)
Oh yes when comics warp to be like films and leave you quite agaw
This is the very picture of an intellectual rights fracas
When Disney didn't have the rights to film the X-Men and their friends
The Inhumans were their idea to have that same magic again
But absolutely nobody could give a damn about their deal
There was a gas or something uh, the Moon? Nobody cares get real
EXCEPT for Ms. Marvel, the only Inhuman breakout success
They want her all over the screen at excited public behest
Oh yes when comics warp to be like films and leave you quite agaw
This is the very picture of an intellectual rights fracas
For years the MCU was not allowed to say the word "mutant"
They twisted themselves into pretzels out to recoup every cent
The silver screen had two Quicksilvers purely for dumb spite reasons
With roots in even dumber masturbatorial rights reasons(4)
Wanda and Pietro had their sixth or seventh origin retcon(5)
To fit the "No More Mutants!"(6) edict corporate decided upon
Then Disney bought the M word back for 73 billion bucks
(A number that should make you want to strangle all these greedy fucks)
Oh yes when comics warp to be like films and leave you quite agaw
This is the very picture of an intellectual rights fracas
Now suddenly it's mutant city all over the comic line
They let the X-Men start a sex cult; also they can never die
With no need for Inhumans they admitted that they're pretty cringe
And nobody will ever give their lore a proper reading binge
The MCU made Kamala a mutant like immediately
Faster than you can say "bad adaptation" or "brand synergy"
In short order the comics gave her the murderization hook
In such a hurry it wasn't even in her own fucking book(7)
Now big surprise she's coming back on the fucking sex cult island
They gave it less than one whole month before they played their fucking hand
So Kamala's a mutant now(8) and got a shitty mourning book(9)
Which when she's coming back NEXT MONTH you might call a pretty bad look
IT'S TRUE WHEN COMICS WARP TO BE LIKE FILMS AND LEAVE YOU JUST AGAW
THAT IS THE VERY PICTURE OF AN INTELLECTUAL RIGHTS FRACAS
~
(1) "At the time, we were told that the Fox-licensed X-Men books weren't to be cancelled as they made too much money for the publisher, but the FF as a middling sales solo title could be missed without hurting the bottom line."
From 2014, when Fox was preparing its 2015 release of Fant4stic, until Disney's film branch recovered the rights by absorbing Fox, the FF were conspicuously absent from comics. The Fantastic Four book was discontinued for the first time since 1962 (for most of those decades they'd supported multiple titles at once) along with all associated merch tchotchkes. By 2017 there was a Twitter hashtag, #WhereAreTheFantasticFour. If you want to hear some people be driven slowly insane by this, Stormcast had a segment called Stormwatch where they analyzed any Johnny Storm appearances in a given month. We're talking deep analyses of single panels.
(2) I know I just linked them, but part of the joke is Bleeding Cool's weird place in the geek news ecosystem. They report everything first, so for the first week you know something you can't strictly confirm it's actually true.
(3) I don't have time to enumerate Slott's crimes but we hate him. Source: Dude trust me👍
(4) How A B-List Hero Became Hot Hollywood Property
Fox could adapt him because they had the rights to all mutants, and Disney could because they had the rights to all Avengers. Some characters are both because the comics didn't use to care about this. This is the entire reason the MCU introduced a Pietro Maximoff and then killed him off. Like seriously who kills off one twin. No that was not based on any comic story.
(5) They're not currently Magneto's kids in the main comic line. Everyone hates this.
(6) This is a cheap reference to the comic storyline "House of M".
(7) They killed her off in Amazing Spider-Man (2022) #26 and none of her supporting cast was there.
(8) Kamala Khan to Return in “Ms. Marvel: The New Mutant”
(9) Look at this thing:
WHO are those anonymously multiracial teens and what are they so goddamn happy about?
~
Bonus
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