#No I'm not being sarcastic

[guhhhhhhhhhhh]

Man.... tumblr really has changed. Someone filmed themself having gay sex on the senate hearing room floor and I haven't seen a single post about it

#this would've been the talk of the town back in the day #I'm being sarcastic of course but this really did happen

[demigods-posts]

okay but imagine being king of the gods and blaming a scrawny twelve-year-old kid for stealing a sacred object of yours that is your responsibility to keep up with me. and the only basis for your argument is that he is your brother's spawn so the kid must be a menace. king behavior. truly.

#i hope y'all know i'm being completely sarcastic #percy jackon and the olympians #pjo #pjo text post #pjo shitposting #pjo series #pjo show #zeus #poseidon #percy jackson

[uncanny-tranny]

I need everybody to love their smiles. To the people with crooked smiles, with yellow or missing teeth (hell, even no teeth!), to the people whose smiles are huge, to the people who have half-smiles/awkward/crooked smiles because of face paralysis, to people with smiles that make their eyes crinkle or disappear: your smile is so amazing. You are wearing your happiness on your face, and that is so raw, so radiant, and so intrinsically human that there is nothing to hate about it.

There is nothing wrong with your smile or your happiness. I hope you can give your genuine smile with no fear. You deserve that

#positivity #ily smiles <3 #so so angry that so many people have been taught to be ASHAMED of their smile #that's so so so so so so SO fucked up. it's honestly evil imo #i'm not even being sarcastic when i say that i think it can be genuinely evil to shame and humiliate people for their natural smile #this is a non-exhaustive list btw. these are just some of the reasons i remember hearing of traits people were ashamed of in their smile

[its-your-mind]

HEY. HEY.

HEY @re-dracula WHAT GAVE YOU THE RIGHT TO HAVE JONATHAN ACTUALLY READING THAT PASSAGE OUT LOUD BEHIND SEWARD DESCRIBING THE SCENE, HUH? WITH THE TEARS IN HIS VOICE AND THE PAUSING AND THE SHORT LITTLE INHALES AND THE VOICE CRACKS? WAS IT TRULY NECESSARY??? I WAS ALREADY CRYING. I DIDN'T NEED THIS TOO. WHAT THE FUCK.

#dracula #dracula daily #re: dracula #re dracula #to be clear this is meant in sarcastic jest this episode was a beautifully crafted piece of art and I'm blown away by the cast and #the producers and the editors... holy fucking shit I know today's was a short episode but I think it's taken its place as my favorite so fa #it beat out jonathan fuckin dropping out of the sky in front of drac with his fuckin knife out in order to protect his wife which was ALSO #very good and made me cheer out loud in my car but THIS #also why does jack get to narrate all the dope ass dramatic scenes #I wonder if Mina was like #no really y'all this dude has the best voice and grammar structure for storytelling #we gotta let him keep doing the phonograph thing and I'll just keep copying it down later #tbh she's so valid for that also y'all are so valid for casting jonny sims in this role bc he SHINES when he's describing emotional shit #he NAILS the middle ground between conveying the emotion of a scene and still being a separate narrator #it's almost like he did a whole podcast of that one time ANYWAY my point is y'all are incredible and I am so fuckin glad y'all decided to #start this project

[writeitinsharpie]

gdi why did the queer video essayist i liked turn out to be a plagerizer

#sharpie says shit #AND during finals season?? when i would be listening to video essays???? #james somerton #is the one i'm talking about #hbomberguy #plagarism and you(tube) #i liked the videos! turns out i liked the ideas he was passing off as his own i guess #i even did a cursory check a few months back and couldn't find anything really problematic about him so i just didn't look further #welp guess i'll just watch overly sarcastic productions #(red and blue you better cite your sources properly and continue not being shitty)

[doumadono]

I just wanna know why so many adult mha smut creators say they age up minors as if it justifies their attraction to them. Would you say it's okay to age up Eri too?

Ah, aging-up fictional characters, my favorite controversial topic! ♥ You know, I was low-key anticipating an anon to drop this kind of question, sooner nor later (what a pity you didn't have balls to come off-anon tho!). I've had my fair share of childish anons before, and trust me, those went straight into the digital dumpster. But hey, this time, I've decided to lay it all out on the table, crystal clear 🙅‍

You know, I've done it all – murder, rape, summoned demons, even glorified Satan and had several children killed in my stories. But guess what? Not a single pair of handcuffs in sight! 😎 And don't get me started on the horror section at any bookstore - it's like a buffet of dreadful deeds.

Let's be real, the purity police can take a hike. There's something oddly fishy about the fact that fanfic, mostly crafted by awesome writers, gets the brunt of the criticism or some ridiculous accusations, especially the smutty bits, while the gruesome stuff gets a free pass 🤷

Look, folks, it's all about context. Fiction is a realm where creativity knows no bounds, right? So, if I want to age-up a character for a mature storyline, I'll go for it 🤷 Look, it's all a part of the creative process. Fiction is like a playground where we can swing from the monkey bars of imagination, right? Aging-up fictional characters is a common practice in creative communities, and it's important to remember that these characters exist solely within the realm of fiction - they are not real, so it doesn't hurt them in any single way. It allows creators to explore different scenarios and relationships without crossing any ethical boundaries :) Also! Aging-up characters isn't some sneaky scheme to write "inappropriate" content about youngsters. It's about taking characters you adore or find fascinating and giving them a new lease on life. It's like those college AU fanfics for characters in their late 30s or kidfic for full-grown adults. It's all about exploring different phases of their lives. So, whether it's smutty or not, the essence remains the same 😎 You see, the whole "aging-up" thing in fanfic/fanart is just common sense. We're not into the whole "let's sexualize kids" scene, so we gracefully turn our characters into adults. It's all about creating content featuring responsible, grown-up folks. And let's get real, if reading about something meant you were all in on it, then every mystery novel reader out there would have to be either an undercover detective nor a murderer 😎 So let's dial down the judgment and just enjoy our creative freedom, shall we?

But you know, trying to equate aging-up with things like grooming/pedophilia is like saying eating a banana is the same as piloting a spaceship because they're both hands-on activities. Let's keep our perspective here, folks, and not get too carried away with the terminology 😂

If you don’t want to read those stories (containing aged-up characters/dark content/smut with aged-up characters) - then don’t read them - problem solved!

Oh, how times have changed, my friend! Back in the day, I used to let all those comments and anonymous hate bring me down. But guess what? I've evolved, and I've got news for the critics: I write what I want to write, and nobody's gonna tell me otherwise. I've got this little thing called free will, and I'm not about to hand it over to anyone who thinks they can dictate what I should or shouldn't put on paper. If that means ruffling a few feathers, so be it. I've shed my tear-soaked days and embraced the fact that I couldn't care less about those sensitive souls who can't handle a bit of fiction. So, to all you "snowflakes" out there, if you're trying to stifle my creativity, good luck, because I'm just going to crank up the heat and write even smuttier storylines with aged-up characters! Thanks for the encouragement, dear Nonnie – you've only fueled my fire! 🔥😎 I might even consider writing some very dark-themed fic with aged-up Eri, why not! 😈

Oh, hey Anon! Quick question for you. Have you ever picked up a Stephen King book? You know, the master of horror and suspense? Well, if you have, you might've noticed that he doesn't shy away from some pretty explicit content, and not just with adults. Sometimes he writes about kids too, and they're sometimes off legal age as well! Surprise, surprise. You can stroll into a bookstore, grab a book off the shelf, and guess what? There's a good chance that some of those books contain content that would make a sailor blush! Yet, the world isn't collapsing because of it. The point is, even in mainstream literature, you'll find situations that might make you raise an eyebrow. So, let's not throw stones at age-up fiction creators when the literary giants sometimes walk on the same edge, right? 😏

In the conclusion, if you've got a problem with aging-up fictional characters, dear Nonnie, you might want to take a chill pill and remember that it's all just a bit of fun in the end ♥ Well, you know what would truly make my day? If you took the liberty to hit that "block" button with glee and gracefully vanished from my interactions. And if, by some chance, you decide to stick around, don't hold your breath for a response. I'll be too busy conjuring up some fiery, smutty tales featuring Bakugo or Shoto or any other character I like to bother with your, shall we say, less-than-enlightening queries. But hey, chin up, pal – here's a little nugget of wisdom from your "older and wiser" friend: go get a life. It's an absolute game-changer 😜 I'm tagging some content creators who write dark fics or use aged-up characters and might face similar anons/anon hate: @mrskokushibo @ectologia @kyojurismo @bakubunny

#aged up characters #asked and answered #anonymous #go get a life #your ask made my day though #I'v been waiting for so long for an anon like you! ♥ #i'm being sarcastic

[2sw]

it's a very long post about THAT scene in 7x03... (30 gifs)

and...

season 4 was one of the darkest periods of sam's life and his relationship with dean. but at the end of s5, in swan song, sam showed how strong he could be. he took control of lucifer and sacrificed himself to stop the apocalypse. sam could do that cause he wanted redemption. he was able to do that cause he loves his brother. dean was there with him the whole time and just decided to keep doing this shit? especially when sam is struggling with the hallucination of the devil?? sam took on hell memories so he could be there for his brother. and later in season 7, he lets hallucifer in because he's so desperate to save dean... Sam's devotion to his brother is always so quiet and sacrificial. give your baby brother some credit, dean!!!! no wonder why sam was so suicidal in s8.. wait why did I say that. now I'm officially sad anyway, I couldn't believe what dean did in this episode when I watched it for the first time and still can't so I'm posting this.

#sorry if my grammar is weird. english is not my native language #sam winchester #dean winchester #spn 7x03 #s7 #gifs #for the record I don't hate dean #just hate most of what he did to sam (I'm not being sarcastic)

[lab-gr0wn-lambs]

Ok do the thousands of Bethyl shippers realize it means they're headcanoning Daryl as a pedophile or

#a 40-something dating a 18yo is weird enough but I'm pretty damn sure she wasn't even 18 yet. And they MET when she was 16. #I'm mad because I wanna draw them. Their season 4 episodes were great. But it was platonic. FAMILIAL. #Daryl was like her cool uncle not her *creepy* uncle ffs #did he *really* treat her any differently than he would the rest of his close family in their situation? Be honest. #a man and a pretty young woman have any kind of chemistry and y'all lose your minds #christ on a stick she called him her chaperone. ''mr dixon''. she was being sarcastic but it's literally true #I know Norman and Emily can be kinda flirty but she's fucking 40. BETH aint! #that dude with the claimers was talking smack about him 'losing some tail' and 'it was one of the young ones wasn't it' #and Daryl was boutta beat his ass for that #and I know it's because he was being a deisrespectful asshole but I like to think it's also because That's Gross Bitch #anyways #I really really hate this ship is what I'm saying #twd #I aint tryna pspsps y'all though so #anti bethyl

[actual-changeling]

i think it's funny that whenever i post something about aziraphale not caring about individual humans—only humanity as a concept—the ONLY counter argument everyone always throws at me is 'he gave his flaming sword away'.

mate.

that was six thousand years ago. LITERALLY fresh out of heaven, to the only two humans in existence, who were the entirety of humanity at that point.

let's look at what he's like in more recent years, yes?

ah yes, telling a person living in an alley that her girlfriend is going to hell with a smile. what a kind person. and the wonderful follow-up which sounds like it is straight out of some conservative, capitalistic asshole's mouth.

and fun fact, someone like that has said THOSE EXACT WORDS to me at some point.

crowley asking the real questions here like always

but hey, that was 1827, maybe he was just having a bad year. or decade. or century.

what about the present day? see, crowley is terrified of gabriel and hates his guts, but do you know what he does? he answers his questions very patiently. he is kind. once he realises gabriel isn't pretending he makes him hot chocolate and tries to help him remember, he empathizes.

aziraphale's patient is non-existent. he yells at him immediately, gets frustrated with the most simple questions, refuses to interact with him and leaves crowley with him after crowley told him "what i NEED is for him to be nowhere near me". how considerate. but hey, maybe he was just having a bad time.

job! he was kind in job, right?

except that he doesn't care about job losing his house, his farmstead, all of his animals being slaughtered and only has a problem with the children dying; which he then tries to rationalize away with his fucking "that's not what god wants" shtick.

meanwhile crowley already has plans to protect the animals AND the children AND job and sitis as best he can.

the flood? perfectly alright to drown everyone, including innocent animals and children! it is god's plan, and what do a few humans mean in god's great big ineffable plan, huh?

then again, he doesn't show much empathy for god's son either when he's being nailed to the cross. french revolution and people being beheaded? oh yes, sure, dreadful—anyway i'm just here for the crepes, the dying humans are just background noise, let's not do anything about that even though it is literally my fucking job as an angel. but noooo. he got peckish and then had lunch. what a fucking hero.

'accidentally' killing a dove because he just had to shove it up his sleeve for a magic act.

someone getting shot and dying? because i was careless? don't care. anyway.

armageddon and all of humanity dying? don't care either until i realise what i personally would lose and then i suddenly give a shit.

centuries upon centuries of aziraphale piling up money and he rather terrorizes poor people than entertain giving them a single dime. crowley has to remind and talk him into it, and as thanks he gets dragged down to hell and tortured.

aziraphale is dripping kindness, isn't he? and all of this doesn't even take into account the ball—human puppet show for his own amusement, this is supervillain shit and you know it—or all the other times he ignored human suffering so he wouldn't be personally inconvenienced.

and ALL OF THAT does not take into account how fucking horribly he treats crowley before time even existed.

aziraphale is not unkind. on a big scale, he cares about humanity, he cares about being nice, being good. he wouldn't intentionally harm someone, but he does not care enough to not be careless—he IS careless, and does NOT care if it kills creatures or humans.

his own personal wants and comfort trump everything else, and that is canon, it is text, it is fact. if you have any canonical examples of aziraphale being genuinely kind simply to be kind, not to be selfishly altruistic, please do add them, i'm serious! if you think i'm wrong, prove me wrong. everything i just listed exists in canon, so please, do the same in return.

giving his sword to adam and eve six thousand years ago does not magically erase everything that came after and it does not give him a free pass to behave however he wants, no matter the cost.

#alex talks good omens #good omens #crowley #aziraphale #good omens season 2 #go2 #aziracrow #crowley x aziraphale #ineffable husbands #ineffable wives #ineffable spouses #ineffable divorce #the final fifteen #good omens meta #getting ready for the hate in 3 2 1 #it's a monday and i'm being overly sarcastic but i'm fucking tired of everyone always yelling at me and giving only one example #as if that invalidates everything i say #just fuck off instead of harassing me babes

[7races]

y'all still believe in real love in 2024+ ??

#lol not even being sarcastic i'm genuinely curious cause shit looks rough out here #my boi been married for 5 years and found out his wife was cheating whole time #made me never want to get married boi lol

[styona]

Copia: I'm a freak in the streets, a geek in the sheets

Terzo: The other way around

Copia: No

Terzo: ...and a stubborn piece of shit

#ghost band #the band ghost #ghost #ghost the band #terzo #terzo my beloved #cardinal copia #cardi c #it's almost like I don't know any other characters of the lore #but to me these two are the most natural pair (OBVIOUSLY PLATONIC I'm not being sarcastic my vocabulary is abysmal) #I just cannot imagine copia having a normal convo with primo or secondo #he can't sit with them

[blacksgarden]

BREAKING NEWS!

Gee, I don't know, maybe it's because... Genshin intentionally made Kaeya because he plays a key role in the storyline?

#i'm being sarcastic #would've assumed this was obvious #happy realization to those who are becoming aware this #especially those like me who like to spoil ourselves with knowledge about him #genshin impact #genshin kaeya #kaeya alberich

[sysig]

You mentioned you mainly ship Glados/Chell when it comes to Portal? Could I please request something with them, however you personally imagine their dynamic? Sorry for the vague prompt, I'm just curious what your ideas are!

Day 25 - As if being dead wasn't bad enough

#My art #Requestober #Portal #Chell #GLaDOS #Big girlfriend <3 #Big Mean girlfriend <3 <3 #Ugh it's been a while since I've drawn her lol I forgot how complex her design is #A lot of this is just visual noise don't look too hard lol #I do love her tho! I just happen to love her mind - her personality - the most ♥ #For a change of pace I listened to her lines in the background rather than music hehe ♪ #I forgot how funny she is in Portal 1 gosh she's so cool and mean and fdjsalfjdsf I love her I love her #I never know where to cut the line between the Player and Chell - she's designed to be a blank slate so hmm #I mean I see her as being extremely long-suffered - you'd have to be to put up with GLaD hehe <3 #Sarcastic and flippant in response to GLaDOS' long monologues haha #But for me personally I could listen to her insult me all day <3 So how much of that carries over to Chell? #Probably a non-zero amount while I'm playing her lol - we see Players nod or shake Chell's head! #That means something! #So just go ahead and insult her it's all in good fun ♪ #I do love the idea of GLaDOS needing Chell to be somewhere and all other methods of moving her are inaccessible #Elevator breaks? :3c She can fall a long distance but her jump height isn't quite that good lol #Ride around on her to go from floor to floor! GLaDOS secretly enjoys it and turns that pleasure into more insults lol #''Stop enjoying this only one of us is allowed to be having fun right now. And by one of us I mean neither of us. Be quiet.'' Lol ♫

[fellthemarvelous]

Warning: I use sarcasm when making points.

I have things to say. (And I'm going to be extremely snarky while saying them.)

Y'all, I love Crowley just as much as anyone else, but the way some people think that defending Crowley means it's necessary to villainize Aziraphale is just gross.

Yeah, Crowley is super easy to sympathize with. We all care about him.

But like...some of these Aziraphale hate takes are insane. (And no, haters, I don't actually want to hear from you unless you want to give me even more fodder to work with.)

"Aziraphale shows compassion for everyone except Crowley." (Actual footage from the very first episode, just to name one example, but okay. I guess sheltering someone who was supposed to be his mortal enemy under his wing was a senseless act of cruelty.)

"Aziraphale doesn't love Crowley." (Wait, I totally utilize my heart eyes for people I don't love too!!)

"Aziraphale has never actually trusted Crowley." (They only helped save the world together though. Weird. And then there was that time in 1941 where he trusted that Crowley wouldn't shoot him in the face while their miracles weren't working.)

"Even in second season when Crowley says "I'm a demon, I lied" Aziraphale doesn't think of Crowley's pain, he was busy being sad for himself. Before this Aziraphale even says "I'm like you now" as if being demon is worse thing than killing innocent children and animals." (Whatever the hell this is.)

This one is just really special. Congratulations on walking into the point and somehow missing it at the same time? That's exactly what makes the system so fucked up in the first place and why Crowley doesn't tell anyone that Aziraphale lied to Heaven. This moment wasn't about Crowley. It was about Aziraphale. Crowley knows the pain and trauma that comes with falling and he doesn't want Aziraphale to experience that?? Aziraphale is allowed to be scared and sad because like, I don't know if you know this, but when you've been indoctrinated into blind obedience, going against the grain is actually really fucking scary because the punishment is terrifying. This is why so many religious abuse survivors relate to Aziraphale?? Also, a demon like Hastur would have killed the animals and the children, so....

"I can not in my sane mind think that Crowley could ever trust Aziraphale with his trauma. He would never share anything that was done to him. Because chances are if he did, he would just be invalidated and belittled. Or worse, he would have been blamed even for it since he is a demon and that's what he deserves (which Crowley already believes to be true)." (What?!?!?!)

Aziraphale, most compassionate and kindest angel there is, would mock Crowley's pain? The same Aziraphale who has been mocked and abused (verbally, mentally and physically) by his superiors would turn around and do the same thing to Crowley when Crowley is the only one who has ever understood him? Aziraphale, the angel who gave the demons a chance to walk away from his bookshop without being hurt, would mock Crowley? Aziraphale, the same angel who had to sit there and listen to Shax mock him and belittle him relentlessly while he protected Jimbriel, would invalidate Crowley?

"Aziraphale only loves Crowley as an angel and not a demon." (Yeah, look how disgusted he is...planning a whole ball just so he could hold hands and dance with his demon. Eww.)

"When Crowley asks for the holy water instead of asking for why he needed something that was so dangerous he immediately jumps to conclusions and then hurts Crowley even more."

I mean other than the fact that we saw what happened to Ligur in season one when he got doused with the holy water, I can't imagine why Aziraphale would be so hesitant to hand something like that over to the love of his life. And he finally did hand it over, knowing he would never be able to forgive himself if Crowley did use it to end his own existence. Not to mention that Hell actually did plan to kill Crowley with holy water at the end of season 1. I would totally jump at the chance to give someone I love something incredibly dangerous to them, but I guess I'm built differently. 🙃 And who cares about Aziraphale's feelings on the subject anyway, am I right?

"Crowley has no reason to trust Aziraphale." (I know right? Aside from the time Aziraphale gave him the holy water even though it scared him or the time he used a human magic trick to save Crowley from having to go back to Hell again or the time he protected Crowley's identity by playing along with Bildad the Shuhite so Heaven wouldn't know he was actually a demon or all the times Aziraphale has offered Crowley sanctuary in his bookshop or when they performed their half miracle together or when they literally swapped bodies.)

"Aziraphale chose Heaven over Crowley because he thinks Crowley is beneath him." (I mean he sacrificed his own happiness to go back to Heaven too, but why bother exploring that when we can all just hate Aziraphale for doing what he thinks is the right thing to do? What even are shades of grey?)

Like I get it. I do. Aziraphale leaving was very upsetting because we wanted to see the Ineffable Husbands get their happy ending. But whenever I see people talk about how rejected Crowley feels, like Aziraphale feels rejected too. You get that, right? And I'm not saying he was right for asking Crowley to go back and become an angel again, but he wants Crowley to be safe and he mistakenly believed it would be that easy.

Just because Aziraphale has a lot to learn doesn't mean he's wrong for going back. Just because Aziraphale has flaws doesn't mean he's bad. Crowley isn't the only one suffering and heartbroken.

And we all saw that the Metatron gave him no time to begin grieving over what just happened. Instead Aziraphale turned around, put a smile on his face that didn't reach his eyes, and stepped onto the elevator because he is going to try and make changes even if he has to do it all alone.

How would revolutions get started if people saw no point in trying to change things for the better?

I leaned into bitch mode in this post. It happens.

#good omens #aziraphale #crowley #ineffable husbands #i used my sarcastic voice #and i will use it again if you try to come at this post with even more aziraphale hate #aziraphale defense squad #crowley would be really fucking unimpressed with the aziraphale hate too #i'm just saying #crowley would also be annoyed with being so woobified by aziraphale haters #and if you think my religious trauma fuels my annoyance you would be right

[damiansgrayson]

Nightwing (Vol. 4) Annual #2

#the Angst #I'm not being sarcastic there it is genuinely upsetting #dick grayson #bruce wayne #dc comics #family: he's the only thing i've ever done right

[sassypantsjaxon]

Still don't understand how anybody could look at Bakugou and Mic and go 'well, they're both loud blond prodigies, clearly they are otherwise the same type of character and have many other similarities. I bet they're even each other's favored student/teacher!'

No. No they are not

#though i suppose it explains some mischaracterizations #like erasermic being portrayed as enemies to lovers because they're being compared to bakudeku #or mic being half a step away from villainy when bakugou is the one who's been compared to a villain. multiple times. #or the other side of bakugou being kind of an asshole with heart of gold which is more in line with mic's sarcastic exterior #I'm sure somebody will get mad at me for saying all this #but oh well #present mic #yamada hizashi #bakugou katsuki #they do not have a single statistic in common. not one. #some of this probably comes from them both being headcanoned as deaf #... as if that negates everything else #some of you really looked at a character who was bullied in high school and a character who is a high school bully #and went 'i bet they're fond of each other :)' #no. go learn to read