#OKAY. theres actually A LOT here

[skitskatdacat63]

Fernando 2012 Chair Lore (source: me)

So I've been thinking a lot about Fernando sitting in this particular chair in the Ferrari garage in 2012 for [redacted] reasons:

Originally I just wanted to find more pictures of it for reference, and then went down a rabbit hole of 2012 pictures, trying to figure out when exactly the chair came to be. There's so many pictures of him in it, and it's so funny to me to imagine them hauling this super villain chair all around the world for him. And so now I'm obsessed with the evolution of it:

Pre-Chair - Australia to Bahrain:

He just had this little stool, well I should say big because it somehow still manages makes him look small. Clearly not comfortable; to paraphrase @sweatyflytrap, it's not conducive to his inner Shakespeare villain monologues

The Chair Appears - Spain

He suddenly now has this, aforementioned, super villain chair. Several things, why is it like this. It looks like a sim chair almost ngl. And then the weird plexiglass support is confusing me, like where did they get that. It furthers my narrative they just had this chair that they couldn't put in a car so they put that clear bottom on it. Anyways yes good, now he has somewhere to brood

The Chair Evolves - Silverstone

Look!! They gave him a booster seat!!!

The Chair is Now Here to Stay :)

I downloaded a truly horrible amount of pics him in this chair, so now you all must also look at them >:)

*he still had the chair in 2013, but I think they took it away from him in 2014 :( Is nothing sacred in this world??? I hope he got to take it home hahaha

#i now have a psychosexual relationship with this chair #and im also just obsessed with the range of it??? #theres an equal amnt of pics where he looks like a hot evil villain and then also ones where hes all curled up on it cutely #the co-stars to this post are really all his different sunglasses and the sexy button up fireproofs #this was actually like a true derangment post #irdk what came over me and caused me to make this but it is very important lore actually and i care a lot about it #im just curious about the origins still #like theyre suddenly like in spain 'here is a present for your home race' #the upgrade in silverstone is still killing me. ik its to make it more comfy but like...its literally a booster seat im sorry #but yeah fernando is so real in these. i too would sit in this chair all the time #okay now stay with me bcs this is just vettonso pilled BUT #the difference btwn him and seb in their garages is so funny to me #seb was always sitting on the cabinets like curled up on them lounging on them kicking his legs over them like a kid on a counter etc etc #and then fernando just has a fucking bond villain chair #and you wonder why i ship them so heavily. scoff scoff #this is just a ref post to draw him and seb together on the cha- huh what wait who said that? what was that huh that was weird #fernando alonso #f1 #formula 1 #formula one #*would be so fucking funny to tag this as lore #fa14 #we do a little bit of f1 #catie.rambling.txt #normal posts that catie normally makes in a normal fashion

[musubiki]

okay im actually a little emotionally attached to mochis shop being a little cat bookstore now

#so warm...... #it invokes the feeling that its been there for 20 years #also seems like the kind of place a witch would run #theres a bunch of plants and cats and warm lighting #im trying to think if the cat witch was a cool side character how would i design her #since a lot of my side characters are cool as hell like murda and lady magg-lynn #it gives off the cozy vibes of broosters cafe #one(1) seating/reading area that consists of a little table and some chairs around it #that usually is taken up by coco/lime/oscar/taffy playing board games or something #some random girl with a crush on lime: heyy is it okay if i sit here and read for a bit? #lime: actually we dont allow reading the books in the store until after youve purchased them. im sure you understand #hes so indifferent and it works against him cuz a lot of girls are like (wow so cool....i want him more now...) #a tiny bookstore on the outter reaches of the downtown area. like before there is a house essentially attatched to the back where they live #oscar somehow affording a house with a storefront in the downtown area #( how did you afford this...) #(i work.) #mochi compensates him appropriately for letting her hijack his store #he doesnt mind though. he wasnt sure what kind of shop to run anyway #plus with magic mochi around he doesnt need to worry about utility bills or furniture or anything ever again so its a fair trade off #(rumor has it that shop has books on anything you could imagine) #someone walks in asking about 8th century pottery techniques from the eastern regions of the kingdom #(let me check the back!) she says and is back with the exact book 5 minutes later

[jesskasb]

ritsu and shou gaming. ritsu and shou climbing trees. ritsu and shou making a youtube video. ritsu and shou shopping. ritsu and shou skateboarding. ritsu and shou trying weird food. ritsu and shou staring contest. ritsu and shou playing club penguin. ritsu and shou hiking. ritsu and shou people watching. ritsu and shou ritsu and shou doing literally anything. i think they're friends and i think they should hang out

#ritsu kageyama #shou suzuki #ritsu #shou #mob psycho 100 #mp100 #shouritsu #ritshou #<- not necessarily #sho suzuki #sho #ok now we know theyve gone fishing together canonically (TECHNICALLY?) so id just love to hear more yknow like #i think theres a lot of potential here psychic powers or not!?!?!?!? and theyd make a funny duo.... imagine the shenanigans #ritsu being perceived as the straight guy but he actually gets silly with it and can be pretty naive or overlooks stuff #and shou being perceived as the silly reckless one but hes really responsible and plans things out properly and pays attention to details #me when the parallels oh goddd im sooo normal about mob psycho #this post is gonna get 0 notes This Is Fine i post for myself #i know the ritsu and shou friendship truthers feel the same #also thinking abt their dry ass texts like maybe shou being like ''hey ritsu wanna go to a rollercoaster'' and 2 days later ritsu like #'“Okay. When?'' and then shou ''idk june 27th?'' and thats how they make their plans if theyre not jsut bumping into each other and decidin #what to do in person. yknow? yknowww?!!! am i wrong or am i an understanderer

[kyistell]

The last of my NJ headcanons. Now let it be known that there will probably be more in the future, considering he is my favorite, HOWEVER this is all I have for now lol.

New Jersey-

Normally is presenting more as Central Jersey, his tics are from North and South trying to speak at the same time

Because of slightly demonic magic, Jersey is fractured like how his state is, there’s North, South, and Central, they can all split into their own persons with North looking the same, but not for too long

While Jersey has used many names during his life, the one his mothers gave him is the only few actually know, Jonah Eriksson Bakker, Eriksson being his Mother’s last name and Bakker his Ma’s

Despite it being hundreds of years, he still isn’t used to English, words never come out quite right, there’s almost always something just slightly missed pronounced even when taking his accent into account

If he’s upset or tired he has a pretty heavy lisp, which along with his already heavy accent when feeling any emotion makes him pretty impossible to understand, the only ones that do are York, Del, and surprisingly Penn

Likes to call New York ‘Yorkie’ Vermont ‘Monty’ Kentucky ‘Ken’ (he’s the only one allowed too) California ‘Westie’ Florida ‘Dia’ ‘Sunshine’ or ‘Flo Rida’ and says Texas like how a Russian would (he has no idea why he started to he just did one day)

The Jersey Devil is real, Jerseys met it multiple times in his life, sometimes they exist in the same space in the Pine Barrens, but most times they don’t

Jersey has a Jersey Devil plush, had it since he was a young child, it’s his prized possession along with one of Connie’s books from the 1850s that he ‘borrowed’ 

When he was younger, Jersey would go to Devil’s Tree to read, it's how he learn the hard way, that his not father father is not the only demon that resides in NJ

In contrast to York, Jersey LOVES drop towers, thinks that they are the second best theme park flat ride to ever exist (the first are those super scramblers that flip while spinning)

Threw his shoe at York so much that Penn ended up buying him sandals as a joke, a joke that Jersey didn’t understand until YEARS later, he still loves and uses those sandals, his aim is unmatched when it comes to hitting York

Would get hit by Yorkie every time he said the R word (which he still doesn't fully believe is a slur but whatever Yorkie), this was specifically during the 2000s

Has brought every State to Action Park at least once when it was still open, it’s best not to question how he convinced Alaska and Hawaii or literally any other State, it’s just best not too

Jersey has a little devil that could in theory be related to the Jersey Devil, it's name is Impy

#welcome to the table #welcome to the statehouse #wttt #wttt new jersey #wttsh new jersey #wttt headcanons #the last one i actually added on here and then added to google doc #listen okay #i wanted him to have a lil devil #but like obvi theres JD #but he and JD have a rocky relationship #so theres no way that would work #and since his father is literally the devil from the bible #i thought “hey why not give him a lil demon” #so here we are #also is it clear enough how much i love Jersey #like its a lot lolz #but of course i have too #i live here #its in my contract

[adelinamoteru]

my thing is, if you have to misinterpret and strip jason’s character out of everything that makes him him to like his character, maybe he’s just not the one for you?

​stop coming on here and writing essays about bruce’s experience with jason’s death and his ways of dealing with it, which while fucked up, are ultimately his own. and then turning around and saying jason was/is wrong as if he is not also a very real victim of his own death? I mean if you can be understanding of why batfam “coped” the way they did then there’s no reason why that understanding shouldn’t also be lent to the actual victim of the crime?

everybody involved doesn’t have good coping mechanisms and thats the point in a good story, not who’s right or wrong. and mind you, making jason’s entire death and resurrection centred around the no kill rule and nothing else is very stupid. it is shocking that, that’s the only part of his story ppl here will focus on and scrutinize.

#jason todd #theres rlly no need to come on here with 50 posts talking about how what he says or does isn’t actually what he means #or try and discredit every bit of personal information and beliefs hes been airing out since day 1 to like him #idk why ppl refuse to give jason the autonomy in his own stories that he deserves but its annoying #if robin jason is the one ur imagining and like then thats totally cool ! robin jason and red hood jason are not the same 👍🏼 #red hood jason is just as valid in his feelings as robin jason is btw #you want jason to heal and eventually ‘stop killing’ bc thats not right #then maybe start with the addressing the reasonings behind WHY he kills instead of the killing itself first #‘jason stop killing’ ‘okay’ and then now what? #is his life miraculously better now because he hasn’t killed when he hasn’t felt remorse for killing before? hes not searching for atonement #hes looking for solutions #dcu #red hood #I know I talk a lot about jason but I just have so much to say

[caffeinatedopossum]

I'm aromantic not in a "I hate romance" way but in a "all my love is highly individualized dependent on the person my love is towards- no two loves will ever be exactly the same because you are different people and I love you in the way that you are" way

Like idk how to explain it but I don't get typical crushes, I don't have a desire to kiss or make out with people, I just have a gentle, ever-present love for anyone who will accept it (and who aligns with my morals). My version of a crush is just really liking someone and wanting to do most things with them but if I find out they have a crush on someone else, I will stop having a crush on them. Like it just turns off. Same if the person turns out to not be as nice as I thought or something

I've had stereotypical romantic moments with my friends, I have friends who are like kids to me, friends who are like siblings to me, and a sister who was my best friend. It's kind of like this thing where I'm not sure romantic attraction is even real? Like it has to be, right, because other people feel it? But I can't really relate to their feelings of falling in love, I feel like I just *am* in love, all the time, with many people and things at once

#i feel like nothing i ever say about it is worded satisfactorily #but maybe thats okay #i dont have to understand #i actually think im very lucky to be this way in fact because it seems like not many people get to experience love like this #I will say though theres something particularly heart breaking about realizing your best friend has replaced you #with a romantic relationship with someone else :( like not always replaced exactly but every time #one of my friends gets into a relationship we drift apart and i feel obligated to let it happen #because this is something they want. and it something i cant understand. it feels a lot like being on the outside looking in #and i love it out here so i try to invite the people i love to come out here or stay out here with me #but they rarely ever do #because they like it inside and i simply don't see the appeal

[perenlop]

have a moment like this every so often but god, pokemon is so kind to neurodivergent kids

#i love how ash being bad at writing an essay the traditional way isn’t something thats shamed in the episode at all #its just ash’s own anxiety plus rotom who is established to be a stickler who’s still learning anyways #and hes scolded for cheating but no one shames him for doing the presentation in a way that’s actually comfortable for him #and hes not shamed for using simpler words or anything. ash isnt an eloquent essay writer and hes bad at retaining information #and thats okay! hes encouraged to take a different route and theres no harm done besides mild embarrassment from getting caught cheating #like. i am someone who likes writing essays for school actually but i have a hard time retaining information #that makes it a lot harder than it should be. so i felt somewhat seen here and its nice #echoed voice #sm lb

[skitskatdacat63]

For everyone who wanted bullfighter Nando when I mentioned it the other day, here you go :D

+ this one I don't feel like coloring yet(imagine he's in Ferrari colors!!!)

#did you know bullfighters dedicate their kill to a friend or member of the public by giving them their hat? #i really wanted to draw silly vettonso where fernando offers seb his hat #seb retires from bullfighting(yeah its an au now) and fernando in his green costume is like; #'here is my hat. now will you come back from retirement? 🥺' #but yeah feel very abnormal abt that ^ and also the thing abt them having someone who helps them get into their costume as a sacred ritual #theres just a lot of thoughts and ideas floating around in my head bcs of it #anyways i liked drawing this but it was very suffering too and took me like 5 hours #its like. you see the intricate embroidery and im like ah! omg! i love painting details!!! #and then remember im not the best w coming up with ideas for the embroidery pattern itself #so pls bear with me 😭😭 mainly i was trying to reference the diamond logo of renault #but most of it kinda just ended up being austrian knots i guess bcs thats what my mind defaults to #i thought the shoulder pad would be the most difficult but that came together the easiest and made the rest actually work in my head #aaahhh also im surprised w the angle of his face! im usually not good at side profiles as well as tilted down heads #but i think he looks pretty good honestly??? #also w the sketch i just wanted to post it bcs i liked his face okay 😭😭😭 #i wanted to paint it too but I realized im so naive thinking i could paint two of these horrifically detailed things in one session #but his face 🥹🥹 i like it!!! theres some renault era pic of him i really like where hes sun drenched and angry looking #^ and i think i captured the vibe well so!!!!! #well anyways mayhe ill draw more of this. it was fun but also like sucked my life force out bcs it kept going from easy to 'I CANT DO THIS' #the pictures of matadors are just...insane to me. tiny waist fat ass flamboyant costume. im dead 🫠 #f1 #formula 1 #fernando alonso #catie.art. #fa14 #matador au

[shiningnightstars]

Simp

NUH UH YOURE WRONG!!!!!!!

#starling sings #asks #anon #I WAS GONNA SAY YES HOWEVER!!!!!!! okay theres a lot of explaining to do here i will try to keep it short #so in my time on quotev me and some of my friends had this inside joke that is similar to anton's allegations #we'd claim someone else is a simp and they would deny it #and we'd gather proof that they are one and theyd continue to deny it (exactly like anton does actually lol) #and we all did that together and made a book thing with screenshots full of evidence for everyone #and honestly that was probably my fondest memory of that site. i dont have many good memories of quotev but that one was... genuinely nice. #that was the only time i felt like a kid on there and was goofing off instead of being treated as a therapist for everyone at the age of 11 #of course no one knew i was 11 but i was still super young and just acted older and more “mature” #but this was one of the few times i got to feel like an actual kid. and it was nice. #SO IM BRINGING THE BIT BACK. I AM NOT A SIMP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #ALLEGATIONSIMP #WOOOOOOOOOOO #anyways. yay <2

[dandyshucks]

waking up to see someone left a semi-self-demeaning reply on a post of mine and i go to their blog just to make sure they're not someone nasty before i reply encouragingly to them, only to see theyre very into the racist white man youtuber profiting off of Algonquian culture that obviously doesnt belong to him 😵‍💫😵‍💫

#this guy is also performing white saviourism to an incredible degree #''well if /i/ dont keep the stories alive then who will?'' THE FUCKING INDIGENOUS PPL IT BELONGS TO MAYBE ??? #i had a whole argument w my brothers about this where they insisted he wasnt racist for this and this was totally fine actually #so this is a very sore spot for me and seeing this person touting how great this guy is has been a slap in the face this morning #theres. a lot to this guy. and it's very frustrating that everyone adores him and has no idea how fucking racist he's being #bc he's being racist towards indigenous ppl. and ppl often dismiss anti-native racism :/ #not that (white esp) ppl rly take ANY racism seriously. but. its a gross trend I've noticed w anti-native racism #like everyone brushes off the caricature present in p*zza tower. bc oh its just silly :) its just a joke :) #bro they are straight up painting us as savages lmfao. thats like. classic racism against indigenous ppl. how are u just okay w that. #anyways! sorry to rant here im just. feeling a little nauseous fhfkdl that was not smth i wanted to see this morning or ever rly #its a very very sore spot for me still after that whole thing w my brothers :'''))))) #vent // #dandy.cmd #racism tw

[meringuejellyfish]

lets talk about this otto figment

#the way otto is depicted within the other members' mental worlds is somethin. ive been thinking about this for the longest time #i think helmut is the only one with a version of otto that isnt negative. but i suppose thats just because helmut loves all his friends so #very much. #this pictures actually funny because compton and cassie are 1 figment aswell as ford and lucy being 1 as well. and ottos just standing #all the way over here. #awesome #interestingly to me is the fact that an otto figment is at helmuts version of the wedding but there is no otto figment in bobs version of #the wedding while all the others are there (IM. pretty sure. ive checked a few times #which since i forgot about the otto figment in helmuts mind made me wonder for a while whether or not otto was at the wedding at all #but no. he was and for one reason or another bobs memory of the wedding does not have otto in it...lmfao #however there is a fully fledged otto on one of the islands in bobs mind - interesting to me considering the other two characters here are #lilli and truman. #(this version of otto is very unsupportive and all like ''we never really liked you that much helmut deserved someone better blahblah'' #so id say perhaps this otto is a more general ''this is how bob thinks the other members thought of him'' and using otto to represent the #entirety of the psychic 7 #im kind of just ? about bob and otto especially because in helmuts mind they are hanging out and theres maybe? and implication that they #actually did have a bond in the real world #yeah theyre arguing in helmuts mind (or something of the sort) but its like friend banter #.kind of #i think they annoyed eachother a lot sometimes but it is okay. #(i like the implication that helmut and bob used to get high together (i like the concept art of otto smoking psitanium #i was going to make a point somewhere where like i wouldnt be surprised if maybe bob gained a deep hatred of some sorts towards otto #after helmut was lost like oh its because of your stupid machine its all your fault #but im not sure if theres any real evidence for this (psychonauts is a game all about small throw away lines theres definitely a chance im #forgetting something #im very much just rambling and saying things #ok fine maybe bob and otto were just arguing in helmuts mental representations of them it does seem like bob has the least fond memories of #him out of any member #most definitely why hes missing from bobs version of the wedding and why otto is the stand in for how bob thinks all the members saw him #sad

[flovverworks]

CHLOE BDAY HIP HIP HURRAY

#stardust speaking ! #saw the preview with chloes lines. oh hes so endearing #im highly in the 'thats akiras lil bro' corner but congrats to the chloe fans #(thinks of lennox bday card with the whole 'the one who wins can ask the loser to do something' ->akira asks leno to bend down #so they can PAT HIM ON THE HEAD......................ure so tall so it probably doessnt happen often right..... #...... #???????? #lenoaki is so tender it makes my head spin #<-person who cried during lennox chara story so is biased #shakes everyone listen the wizard are ssooooo important to akira and for akiras development and building selfconfidence and selflove this #is why i will nvr ever shut up about them here cuz they have such a massive role- <-just likes them a lot #T_^ #okay anyway i actually wrote a lil thing for myself today HURRAY ive been in a more. oh i can do things. mood lately #theres a selfindulgent thing i wanna write a lil bit off but aside from that i wanna. do something here #inb4 itll be a tiny teeny thing ive been thinking about lately before tackling 2 para+ stuff. WE WILL SEE eventually #not tonite for sure i am zzzzzzzzz #but i missed writing tiny things for myself so im gonna try to keep at this. #one day ill do that for akira things too. i need to write down my silly postmhyk aus and my silly dramatic modern aus for me myself and i #i dont talk about it a lot here cuz its embarrassing but wizards in akiras world is always a funny concept to me #5ever thinking about INTERNET IS SUGOI figaro from that one figaaki comic #actually that one where figaro memorized akiras name when its written makes me dizzy I WANNA TALK ABOUT STUFF LIKE THAT AGAIN..... #T_T akira learning how to write the wizards names. yknow. at least. since they cant read the language at all #okay its way past my bedtime #i cant get into akira & their language at this hour itll be too much #tldr while i think its difficult for akira to rly pick it up (cuz they understand everything they say!??!?!??!?!) #recognizing words u see commonly....................happens..........+ akira making an effort to learn certain words

[manga-panels-daily]

#inuyasha #mangacap #OKAY so I actually wanted to talk about this one #one of the things I love about this story is what an adaptable and intelligent heroine kagome is #like here we’re still early on and its so clear that she’s out of her element and not picking up (potentially obvious) things #because theres so much information! shes still sorting through it all #but she picks up on things so fast and it really doesn’t take long for her to get her bearings #like she never feels overpowered to me bc she needs to LEARN and make mistakes #but she is always learning and becoming stronger #anyway I have a lot to say about kagome and also akane?? maybe someday I’ll write smth on takahashi’s heroines #OH GOD I SHOULD BE TAGGING THESE AS #takahashi rumiko #OOPS OH GOD OH NO #from now on i will djsksk

[axellis-archv-2]

hey *takes what was supposed to be just a visualization in case i ever wanted to draw overhallidays place in the future and then spends 4 hours on it

#📗 my post #🧯 overhalliday (s/i) #yeah ummm yeahn . hey . theres a lot in here let me divulge in the tags #hes supposed to live in like a town thats pretty Scrunched In with buildings kind of surrounding the place so the debug building behind #is supposed to mimic the back alley area that he uses for all his scraps && parts. really id imagine at some point he put a tarp over it #so metal doesnt rust && whatnot . but theres not really a way to do that i think in the sims #the bathroom being right where the stairs are is both a) bc i wrote that in a fic b) sometimes houses are dumb okay we cant all win #there isnt an operating table apparently?? so im using a lounge chair as a stand in and honestly it works well #really if i wanted to i wouldve added like soo much more clutter because he is. not the most organized #ftr i think like every sims bed has a headboard and he DOES NOT have that hes got a bed frame and a mattress that is IT!!! #^ not every sims one . the ones that dont talks abt...bed bugs. which . ew #and for the record also i think his place is only unique in the sense that you walk in and theres a workshop . exterior wise theres #probably like a bunchhh that look the same as youre walking down . all scrunched together #i actually donthave a set place in mind that he lives i just know its like. a Town #a town that doesnt have a hardware store . so he takes a train if he ever needs supplies & it takes abt 10 minutes to get to the city #so hes not like. Cut Off per se but the locals definitely know his deal enough #idk looking at it and imagining a bunch side by side makes me think of likee. like. norway? <- my biases it was like the 2nd thing i google #it would be nice to live by a bunch of water #but also im . i dont know anything abt architecture this very easily could read as somewhere in america or something like that #idk but in my head it snows a lot there thats like all i have thought out

[tianhai03]

hey everyone. im not here to post art right now, i just have something on my mind that i kinda wanna ramble about, which i’ll put under a read more below bc its really long lol. i know this is kinda sudden but i promise its nothing serious. stick around if you’re somehow interested in listening to my ramblings, if not then thank you for reading this anyway, and thanks for all your continuous support :)

i cant remember the reason why anymore, but a couple minutes ago i felt like going through all the blogs ive followed on here. i only follow like 276 blogs if i remember correctly, it’s not much considering how i’ve been here since 2015. i probably felt like looking through it because i was reminded of an artist i follow here and i wanted to see if they’ve updated anything, i have no clue lol.

anyways i looked through the list, and i found a lot of artists ive followed since my early days in 2015, when i first started posting art. some i still remember fondly, some i have vague memories of, and others... i just dont recognize anymore. the only thing im sure of is that they were all artists i looked up to very much, artists who have also definitely motivated me to keep drawing just so i can be as good as them someday. im confident enough to say that ive gotten close to a lot of their levels already, and i am now very comfortable with drawing in a style that is uniquely my own. i have all these artists to thank for that.

but... another thing ive also realized is, most of them arent posting anymore. some have already stopped before i myself stopped tumblr briefly in around 2019, but a lot of them stopped at that exact same year. it makes me kinda sad, i remember looking forward to these artists’ drawings often, but a lot of them just kinda dipped out of existence 3 years ago, without other social medias that i can check to make sure theyre still around. it made me think about how hellish every year has been starting from 2019, it mightve only been 3 years but it sure felt like its been a decade. all i can do right now is hope that they’re still okay, somewhere in the world, still safe and still doing whatever they love.

and on the same note, i hope every single person who is still following me, who still constantly come up to this crumbling website, maybe even look forward to me posting my art; i hope you guys are doing well too. i know there are a lot of people who were from my old 2018 dmc days (since i came back to the fandom just half a year ago and a lot of people started checking up on me again), some of you guys were probably even from my earliest 2016 undertale days; whether you followed me 6 years ago or just today, i want to thank you guys, from the bottom of my heart, for always giving me kind support on the things i do. i am not joking when i said i wont be here right now if it werent for you guys. thank you so, so much.

#guess i just felt like getting sappy today. #im sorry if this makes anyone anxious; i promise i am totally okay and nothing bad is happening to me #it's just... sometimes you look back on your life to remember the things you've done that led to the life you have today #ive been doing that a lot lately. and i just wanted to talk about what ive thought about #i actually feel a lot better thinking about things like this. it reminds me of the reason why i started drawing in the first place #with how things have been lately especially with my own uni life; it gets so frustrating its very easy to forget why i liked drawing so much #but im not gonna forget about it now; even if i stop drawing someday i'll forever hold on to these memories #i probably sound like a broken record now but; genuinely; thanks for everything i really do appreciate it #allyrambles #long post #if youve read till here #through this long ass post ive been writing for over 30 minutes now #do me a favour and talk to a long time friend you have that you havent talked to in a while #yknow the ones. you were super close but then you just slowly stopped talking to each other? even though nothing bad happened? #do me a favour and just shoot them a message. a short one will do #even a little 'hey we havent talked in a while; just wanted to check up on you and make sure youre still okay' is enough #times are tough right now. it has been for the past 2 years for everyone #if you can do it; im sure it will brighten someone's day up; to know that theres someone out there who still cares #someone will appreciate the kindness #im gonna go now. this post has gotten way longer than i expected and its almost time for bed #i hope everyone has a decent day :) thanks again for reading #hopefully i dont regret this someday lol

[caffeinatedopossum]

I keep seeing tiktoks about how the owl house fandom is so annoying apparently and people can't seem to escape the endless fan content and passionate rants about it... like girl you know we're mostly desperate gays and traumatized autistics right. Please just let us have this ;-;

Anyway I absolutely should not have taken that personally but after *finally* starting to become a little more comfortable with having special interests and hyperfixations ... I did unfortunately take it personally 😔 like it seems like one very small thing to get upset about but I'm so tired of constantly worrying that my only form of happiness will only ever be annoying to people and then having that fear affirmed again and again.

#its okay to not like the same things as me. theres plenty of things that my favorite people like that i dont really #and i still love to see them happy about things #im not being subjected to some horrible torture just because someone likes something #it honestly makes me really happy that other people can find joy where i cant #because you know sometimes i cant find anything to be happy about and those excited faces and passionate rants #remind me that theres happiness even in places where i cant see it #this kinda derailed but yeah #basically im just really tired #hearing stuff like this makes me want to stop making things and never talk again #its the reason im so surprised when someone likes what i say or what i make #because i have been fully prepared for people to openly hate me or at least find me annoying #idk i know im too sensitive about things and i have a lot to work through #but thats what im trying to do you know #im trying to figure out why this is upsetting to me #actually no you know what this is a pretty big deal #i want people to stop acting like my mere existence is an inconvenience to them #you can look away! im not imposing myself on you im literally just here #i didnt choose to be here but i am and im gonna enjoy it if and when i can