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reiderwriter · 7 months

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The Us That Could Have Been

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Female BAU Reader

Requested: yes - role reversal of the player!Spencer fic I posted here!

W/C: 5.7k

Summary: They say if you want to get over one man, you have to get under another. Spencer isn't so sure why he dislikes the idea of you doing that quite so much.

Warnings: Mentions of Maeve, spoilers for S8, mentions of minor character deaths, smut, unprotected sex, creampie, angst.

A/N: I'm not going to apologise for this one... Have fun.

Find the rest of my masterlist here.

If you were a genius, you’d know that it took you three hours, twenty-three minutes, and six seconds to fall in love with Spencer Reid. If you were a genius, you’d also know that it took him five years, seven months, twenty-seven days, and two hours to the second for him to break your heart. The thing you were learning about geniuses though, is that they were the most oblivious people on the planet.

Her name was Maeve, he had told all of you. And he needed your help to save her because he was in love with her. And of course, you went along with it, you tried your best even while your heart was cracked in two because at this point, you couldn’t stand the desperation on his face. The day he told you about her, only days before he died, you cried in the arms of Penelope Garcia for hours, letting her console you as you felt your world get flipped upside down.

“I don’t know why I’m feeling like this, god, Penelope. Five years, and I knew, I knew that if he liked me like that something would have happened already, but I just…” She rubbed your back as you laid your head on her shoulder, letting your tears fall freely as the sobs wracked through your body.

“I’ve been in love with him for five years and he never even noticed, and… Penelope he hasn’t seen this girl before and he’s desperate for her. What about me is so unlovable?” Your voice cracked as you broke down again, burying your head in your friend's arms as you let all the emotions hit you at once.

“Y/N you listen to me right now. You are not unlovable, you have never been unlovable. If Spencer cannot see what is right in front of him, then he is an idiot. You are the most amazing thing that has happened to him, you’re a great friend, you’re smart, you’re beautiful-”

“I’m not her. Penelope, I… I want to be her-” She held you as you emptied yourself for hours, crying until you were so physically exhausted that you just couldn’t anymore. You couldn’t say that you stopped crying per se, just that your body ran out of emotions to sustain you.

“Okay, Y/N, here’s what you’re going to do now,” Penelope said. She’d heard you out for long enough, but she wasn’t going to let you be miserable for long.

“You’re going to pick yourself up, take care of yourself. Get a haircut, dye your hair, whatever you need to do to get some change. And then you’re going to do your goddamn best to forget him, because if he’s too stupid to realize how special and amazing you are then he really doesn’t deserve you.” You sniffled a bit and nodded at her words.

“And then, you’re going to get back out there. Y/N, when was the last time you went on a date?”

“I don’t know it’s been… The last one I can remember was before I entered the BAU. I’ve just been so busy-”

“Bullshit. You’re going to put yourself back out there and find a man, or multiple men, who actually value you and want you. A wise scholar once said the best way to get over a man is to get under another.”

–X–

A year later and you’d probably taken Penelope’s words to heart a little bit too much. Maeve had died at the hands of her stalker not even a day later, and you felt terrible for Spencer, but he’d pushed you away, he’d pushed everyone away, so you’d decided she was right.

Your first date had been a few weeks later, and you’d have liked the fact that you’d taken him back to your place and then immediately kicked him out and never seen him again after that to stay a secret. But the BAU copycat didn’t let any of your business stay within the team for long. He had pictures of you with the first guy, the guy from a week later, and the guy after him as well. By the time you’d figured out who the copycat murderer who’d sent you all Zugzwang-themed threats was, he’d got pictures of you locking lips with five separate one-night stands.

The team had said nothing about it, of course, except Hotch’s private aside asking if any of the men in the pictures needed informing about the situation. You’d had to admit to them that you’d not seen any of them since, and, with no reaction from Spencer, you’d felt almost vindicated in taking this step.

If he didn’t care then, in those tense months where you were all leaning on each other for support, reeling from the death of Erin Strauss and the attacks on the team, closer than you’d really ever been before, then he wouldn’t ever care.

The thought was freeing. So you’d kept up with your constant stream of men, not letting them get close enough to hurt you in the way that Spencer had, using them and discarding them like broken toys, ignoring that maybe it was you that was the broken one.

It took a year for him to notice it. A year of you coming in with suspicious bruises on your neck that you laughed off, a year of your newfound confidence, a year of your conscious distance for him to notice that he missed you. It was slow at first. In those first few months, he just accepted that of course, you’d been seeing people. He’d assumed from the photographs everyone had seen that you’d been dating the entire time he’d known you, the feeling unsettling him a little, but he thought that was only because he’d never noticed.

Now it was all he could notice. The way you’d walk in sometimes smelling unfamiliar, having showered at a hookup's place before taking off, the way you were suddenly open to the flirting by the local PDs on your cases. The way a sadness seeped into his chest every time he saw you with someone else. Envy wasn’t a feeling he was familiar with, so it took him stupidly long to name the emotion.

You were back at O’Keefe’s after a local case successfully closed, and if you were drinking a lot, no one mentioned it. No one except Spencer, who’d made it his objective to keep you safe and by his side the entire night, for reasons he couldn’t even name. It was stifling, having him constantly hovering over you.

“Spencer, lighten up a bit, have a drink.” You smiled up at him, trying to get him to loosen up so you could escape the way his sudden care was making you feel. The bartender was eyeing you up from his place behind the bar, and while you were usually careful not to get involved with men whom you’d likely run across again, you were throwing caution to the wind that day.

“I’ll have a drink if you drink some water and slow down a bit, Y/N.” He handed you the glass he’d retrieved earlier and you sipped it slowly, squirming under the care in his gaze. He ordered a drink, and you eyed up the bartender as he did so, pushing Spencer’s hand off your hip as he approached, offering him a smile. He looked between you and the unfamiliar man, and felt a cold flash in his veins, waiting for his drink and then pulling you away back to the table with the rest of your friends, tangling your hand with his.

You pulled out of his grip but followed him dutifully. He guided you into your seat quickly, brushing your hair out of your eyes before falling back into conversation with the rest of the team. You hated the way he could still make your heart stutter, still have you feeling hot all over from a single touch, and you felt trapped in the booth, screaming for a way out.

Your chance came an hour later, when he excused himself to the bathroom, and you excused yourself as well, running back up to the bar. When he came back, you were gone.

“Where is Y/N?” He asked with a scowl, cursing himself for letting his eyes off you for even a second when you’d drank so much that night, having come back to suggest you turn in for the night, getting ready to offer you a ride home.

“Y/N? By now, she’s either in the back room with the bartender or she’s convinced him to get off early and head back to hers,” Morgan chuckled, taking a swig of his drink. “Took her only two minutes of conversation to have him inviting her out the back entrance, she’s been gone for like five minutes now.

The constricted feeling settled in his chest again, as his scowl deepened. Not knowing why he was feeling so goddamn destroyed by that statement, he let his head hang and left the bar himself, taking himself outside to get in his car and go home. Unbeknownst to him, you watched him leave from the alley behind the bar, the bartender placing open-mouthed kisses on your exposed neck as you buried your worryingly consistent feelings in the scent of bourbon and lust.

The next week is rough for both of you. You laugh and play along with Morgan’s jokes about your game, keeping an eye out for him the entire time and ending all the conversations as you feel him enter the room or step closer. It doesn’t stop him from hearing it all, though, all the details about your sex life tormenting him, as he boils with anger at how wreckless you’re being with your constant stream of guys.

“Mama, you were on fire last week. Took you only two minutes to disappear with that guy, you’re going to have to let me in on your secrets,” Morgan laughed from his perch on your desk.

“Sorry, a magician never reveals her secrets, and what I do is definitely magic.” Your tone was suggestive and set the man off in a booming laugh, but with your back to the door, you hadn’t heard Spencer’s entrance.

“The secret is that men are more accepting of casual hook-ups with strangers than women,” he snapped at you both, beginning to ramble as you both looked up at him in shock.

“Okay, kid, I was just joking-”

“When surveyed over 75% of men said they would be willing to have sex with a complete stranger, vs. 0% of women, and while that’s just one study, there are multiple others that I could quote that have similar results.”

“Spencer,” you chastised him, but he didn’t stop.

“What? Did you want to know when posing the question of an affair to people in a relationship that 18% of men reacted positively to having casual sex with a stranger, and surprisingly 4% of women also reacted in the affirmative? Did you ask that guy if he had a girlfriend before you fell into his bed, Y/N?”

“Okay, that’s enough, Spencer, take a walk. I don’t know what’s up with you today, but that was out of line. Hotch is looking for you in his office.” The words came from Morgan, but he kept his eyes locked with yours as he was scolded, memorizing the look of pain in your eyes as he finally backed away.

He didn’t know why he did it. He knew it would hurt you, and yet he continued anyway, even after you’d begged him to stop. He was hurt, and he didn’t know why, and he didn’t think he had any reason to be hurt, and somehow it was all because you’d been in the back of his mind constantly for as long as he could remember.

–X–

“Okay, girl’s night, my place, tomorrow night. There are no cases, and I managed to get Hotch to agree to let us put our phones on silent for the night, so it’s just me, you, JJ, and Blake, a bottle of wine and some good old-fashioned girl talk, what do you say?” Penelope asked you gleefully in the break room one day as you both prepared your drinks for a busy day of paperwork ahead.

“I’m sorry, Pen, I have plans already.” You grinned up at her as she pouted, promising to make it up to her another time. You didn’t offer an explanation though, just excusing yourself back to your desk and letting her know that you’d make it up to her another time.

Reid took your place as soon as you vacated it. Almost obsessively, he’d been following you around like a lost puppy since he’d exploded on you the other day.

“I know you said girls’ night but… Could... Could I come? I think I need some uh, girl talk?” He asked Penelope, an awkward, embarrassed look on his face as he smiled tensely. If anyone knew what was wrong with him, recently, it would be them.

Last year, he’d have said it was you, but the distance he’d felt recently, combined with the fact that he was almost 90% sure you were the root of his problems had him desperate for other opinions.

“Oh. Are you sure, Spencer, we’ll be talking about all kinds of gross women stuff?”

“I was raised by a single mother. I’m sure nothing you say could gross me out. Please?” She nodded her approval telling him what time to get there and to bring his beverage of choice, knowing he didn’t really drink wine all that much if he could help it.

He turned up twenty minutes late, after spending a great deal of time pacing outside of Penelope’s apartment building wondering if he had any right to unburden himself on them like this. Pacing he wondered whether you’d actually showed up despite your mysterious plans and whether this had been all for naught anyway.

When he eventually knocked on the door, Penelope opened it and greeted him with a warm hug. “We were wondering when you were going to knock on the door, one more minute and we were going to come out to get you.”

JJ stood up to hug him, wine glass in her hand, and Blake offered him a wave from her perch on the couch. He took off his scarf and coat and accepted the glass of water Penelope offered him, settling into a chair opposite the three women.

“Penelope said you wanted advice about something?” Blake was the first to enquire, the three of them getting straight into it, not letting him chicken out of it.

“Yeah, I think so. Lately, I’ve been having these, I don’t know, weird feelings…”

“Oh god, I thought I was a few years out from having the talk with someone,” JJ joked, but Penelope shushed her quickly after a quick snicker, letting him continue.

“I’ve been… I’m not sure if you’ve noticed, but I’ve been acting really weird around Y/N, and I can’t figure out why.” He finally pushed the words out, feeling a weight off his chest at the confession.

“You can’t?” The room was silent for a minute as they looked at each other, and he looked at them looking at each other, wondering what it was exactly that he’d missed.

“Yeah? I don’t know, every time I see her I just want to, I don’t know, have her attention on me, even if I have to say something a little mean to get it. And in the bar that time, I was so, I don’t know hurt, I guess, when she disappeared without saying goodbye.”

They just listened to him go on, not stopping to interrupt him, so he continued.

“And there’s been this weird distance between us lately, and I guess it’s been there for a while, but I miss her, but she’s still there. I can still talk to her, and I can still spend time with her but I miss her all the time.”

“Spencer,” Blake said with a soft voice. “Since when have you been feeling like this?”

“I don’t know, I guess it started after everything happened with Strauss and the copycat in New York. But she’s always been… I don’t know, closer than most people? But every time I think we’re getting back to normal recently, she pulls away again and there’s this… void where she should be.”

JJ put her drink down and leaned a little closer to him, putting a hand on his shoulder.

“Spencer, I think you might be in love with her.” He considered the words for a moment, before getting ready to dismiss them.

“No, love is a good emotion, this doesn’t feel good, it feels… ugly.” Blake stared at him sympathetically, calmly talking him around.

“Spencer, think about it. You’re protective over her, you don’t like seeing her with other people, this all started right around the time the copycat sent those pictures of her with other people. It is love, and it’s jealousy, too.”

The words hit him like a tonne of bricks as he suddenly felt the full force of his words. He was in love with you.

“Oh god, what do I do?” He held his head in his hands, and Penelope scoffed a little from her seat, the rest of them turning to look at him.

“I’m sorry, you’re going to have to figure this one out on your own genius.” She said with a slightly sharp tone, and even the girls sent her questioning stares as she continued.

“You don’t just get to decide that you want her after all this time, not after how you’ve been treating her these last few months.” She turns her head away a little bit and sips her drink, her tough-love approach leaving him slightly defeated.

“Penelope, do you know something?” Blake asks firmly, trying to coax some answers out of her.

“If I did, I’d be under a strict oath not to tell anyone. And I wouldn’t want to considering how much pain she was in when she made me swear never to tell anyone.” It was clear from the tone of her voice that she really wanted to say something though, the words desperate to spill out.

“Penelope, your loyalty is commendable, but don’t you think what you have to say could help both of them?” JJ quietly coaxed out of her, and she finally gave in.

“Okay, but if you hurt her, Spencer Reid, I will never forgive you ever again.” He nodded quickly, hanging onto her every word.

“Think about what else happened a year ago.” She encouraged him, and for a moment, he was coming up blank.

“A year ago? We were in the middle of the copycat case. Strauss had just been killed. We were close to being pulled off the case-”

“You got a girlfriend, Spencer. You came in one day out of the blue and just announced that you were in love with someone you hadn’t met, and you didn’t realize that you were torturing her.” Penelope tried really hard not to snap at him, but his ignorance of your feelings was frustrating, to say the least.

“What Penelope is trying to say, Spencer, is that we think Y/N was in love with you, too,” JJ added, softening the blow. “And finding out you didn’t feel the same way so suddenly was, well it was a shock to all of us really.”

“What Penelope is trying to say is that she spent six hours with me crying into this couch, and then picked herself up and helped you try to save the woman you had chosen over her. So yeah, she’s been a bit distant, but can you really blame her?”

“She… She was in love with me?” His heart stopped for a second, dropping to the pit of his stomach as he thought back to those days, how you’d acted around him, the smiles that hadn’t reached your eyes, the reassurances that he’d brushed off, so desperate to help Maeve.

“Honestly, until you told us about Maeve, I thought you two had something going on,” Blake added.

“We used to have an office bet when Emily was around about which of the two of you would confess first,” JJ admitted shyly.

“Oh, god.” He let his head hang a little in shame. “Do you… do you think she still feels the same?”

They shared another glance at each other again, and he panicked trying desperately to decode whatever it was that had just passed between them.

“Look, we shouldn’t profile each other but… It’s not a coincidence that all of her hookups tend to happen after you pay her some attention.” Blake observed, letting Reid fill in the blanks of her statement.

“That might be my fault actually, I told her the best way to get over you is to get under someone else.”

“I don’t want her under someone else,” he stated then, cutting himself off before he could say anything else too damning.

“She’s not here tonight, why isn’t she here?” He panicked looking frantically around the room for answers, but none of them knew really.

“She said she had plans, but she didn’t tell me what they are.”

“Do you think she’s… do you think she’s with…” He couldn’t finish the thought, instead bolting upright and gathering his things.

“I need to go.” He let out, as the women cheered behind him, finally happy that he was taking action. Penelope shouted your address at him as he left as if he didn’t already have it memorized, running out in the rain, his feet carrying him to your apartment.

He saw the light on when he approached, thankful that you were still there, and bounded up the stairs to your floor, not giving himself time to second guess this before he pounded on your door.

You pulled the door open, a confused look on your face as you greeted him, his chest heaving, water dripping down his face. He looked like a mess.

“Are you alone?” He gasped out, having to pause between each word to catch his breath.

“Spencer, what are you doing-” The breath left your body as he leaned into you, catching you around the hips and walking you back into your apartment, your back hitting the wall behind you as he rested his forehead against your own, chest still desperately drawing in oxygen.

“Please, please tell me right now if there’s someone here with you. If there is, I’ll leave, if there isn’t…” His gaze fell to your lips and your entire body lit up, the haze of your confusion finally lifting as you took in each of his words. His lips moved forward, seconds from connecting with your own when his question was finally answered.

“Y/N? Who is it?” The voice was male, and it was coming from your living room, but it was all Spencer needed to know as he detangled himself from you, pushing his wet hair out of his face and putting some distance between you two, muttering apologies as he backed out of the door again.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t… I’m sorry,” he said, quickly turning away from you and leaving your apartment quickly.

“Spencer, wait-” You tried to yell after him, but it was too late. He had disappeared into the night, as quickly as he came.

You returned to the living room, cursing yourself for not answering quickly enough as you crawled back into the seat you’d just left.

“What was all that?” Your brother asked from his perch, shoveling popcorn into his mouth in a way that had you somehow even more pissed at him for the simple fact of his existence.

“That was Spencer. He… God, I think he thinks I’m in here with a guy.”

–X–

The next few days at work were tense, as you desperately tried everything to catch his eye. But you weren’t sure why you were putting in so much effort. He was the one who had burst into your apartment and practically begged you for your attention, why were you now the one chasing him?

Needless to say, you took your frustrations straight to Penelope Monday morning.

“And then he left without letting me explain that it was my brother, and he hasn’t talked to me once this morning, he keeps running away from me and I don’t even know what the fuck it was he was trying to gain from all that and- ughh he is so dense.”

Penelope had sensed the oncoming disaster the moment she’d seen your social media post about your brother’s visit Saturday morning, and you only confirmed all her fears as you unloaded onto her. She silently cursed Spencer as well, and once she’d given you some reassurance and reminded you that you had some case files on your desk that were urgent and distracting enough to calm you down, she practically lept from her seat to hunt Reid down.

“Spencer Reid, you get your ass in my office right this second,” she whisper screamed at him in the breakroom, his sunken eyes showing that his jump to conclusions had left him in a poor emotional state. He jolted at her words, as she watched to see if you noticed the two of them before practically frog-marching him off down the hall.

“What the hell happened? We sent you off to confess your feelings, and you what? Pin her to the wall and breathe down her neck before running off with your tail between your legs?”

He looked down guiltily before replying. “She had a guy there, Penelope, I didn’t want to… I didn’t want to get rejected like that.”

“She did not have a guy there, Spencer, she had her brother there.” She pulled up your post on her phone and thrust it in his face as she watched his eyes go wide at his own stupidity, clutching the phone as he read your words.

“And if you weren’t a coward, you’d have stayed and told her even if she did actually have someone over.”

He’d since tuned out her words though, the crushing weight of his almost-confession that had been stuck to him since the weekend dissipating slowly.

“This is her brother?” He looked up at you again, desperate to confirm the words she’d already said.

“Yes. You’d know that if you weren’t such a technophobic freak. I love you but this is the 21st Century and you’re an idiot.”

“Yeah, I am.” He handed her the phone back and slunk out of the office, and back to his desk. He had a chance to try again, and he wasn’t going to fuck it up this time.

–X–

You didn’t know how you knew that night, but when you heard the knock at your door, you knew it was him.

You hesitated before reaching for the door handle, pulling it open, and confirming your suspicions.

“Hi.” You said, and he returned the greeting with a mumble of his own before the two of you fell into silence again. He opened his mouth as if he wanted to say something else, but couldn’t, instead letting his gaze fall to your lips. You heard the hidden question in his look and opened the door a little wider.

It took only a moment for him to come crashing into you, hands holding your face as his lips met yours in a passionate embrace, drinking you in as again walked you back into your apartment, not even breaking away as he closed the door behind you.

You wrapped your arms up and around his neck, as you let his hands fall to your hips, your chest, your ass, exploring every part of your body he could reach as you stood caught up in each other. In your desperation for each other, you hit walls, and bumped into tables, finally stopping at your kitchen island as he lifted you up, wrapping your legs around his waist as he started pressing kisses down the hollow of your neck.

“I’m sorry,” he muttered between kisses. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know it was your brother and I’m sorry I didn’t come sooner, and I’m sorry I’ve been so weird recently.” You pulled his face back up to your own claiming his lips in yours once again, swallowing each of his other apologies.

He pulled away again, looking at you tenderly as he lifted you into his arms and gently carried you into your room, laying you down on your bed.

“I love you,” he whispered, and the words broke you. You’d spent five years practically begging him to say them, and another year since trying to bury even the very idea of him feeling the same way deep inside you. Tears fell from your eyes and he kissed each one of them away, muttering confessions into your skin.

“I love you, please don’t cry.”

“I love you, you’re so beautiful.”

“I love you and I’m so so sorry.” You pushed him away again slightly, regaining enough of your composure to finally talk again.

“I need to know that you’re serious, Spencer. I can’t… I can’t do this if you’re not totally sure, because it will destroy me.” Your voice broke as the words stumbled over the knot in your throat, your hands balled into his shirt, legs still wrapped around him.

“I’m serious. I don’t want to hurt you ever again.” He pressed his lips back into yours again, and you let the kiss deepen, lips slanting over each other in desperation as the need to be joined overtook your body.

He lifted your skirt, trailing a hand between the two of you as he checked your arousal. You could feel his cock pressing into your thigh, desperate to be freed from it’s restraints. He began kissing his way down your naval, but you pulled him back up.

“No, I need you now. There will be time for that later, but if you don’t do this now I think I’ll drive myself mad with wanting.” His lips reconnected with yours again as you began divesting yourselves of clothing, and within another two minutes, he was pressing into you, muttering more adoring serenades into your skin as he began catching the tears escaping your eyes again.

“Yes, Spencer, more please,” you moaned underneath him, legs tight around him as he began thrusting into you with a ferocity you hadn’t felt from him before. It was tender, but you were both desperate, after months of separation, to come back into one another.

Your lips and teeth clashed together as you let the room echo with your moans, his moans, and the sound of your skin slapping against each other. His forehead came to rest against your own as he grew closer to his release, lips disconnecting as you just stared into each other's eyes in that moment, seeing each other truly for the very first time.

“Y/N, I’m gonna… I’m gonna cum.” He pressed down into you harder, looking down to the place where you were joined and letting out a whispered curse as he watched you take every inch of him. His hips stuttered then, and you felt your own climax reach you as you felt him release into you, his lips softly tracing your own as you breathed each other in again.

He pulled out and immediately went to work making sure you were comfortable, propping you up on the bed, making sure the pillows behind you were plump and soft, and running off to find something to clean yourself up with. You watched him silently, again brushing some of the tears from your eyes.

“How do you feel?” He said shyly as he returned, having pulled his pants back on at least as he bought you a glass of water. You offered him a small smile and a thank you as you replied.

“I think… I think we need to talk, Spencer.” You said, not meeting his eyes as he looked down at you attentively.

“Why did you come tonight, Spencer?” You asked, voice so quiet you resisted the urge to repeat the question, knowing that he heard you perfectly clearly,

“I needed to tell you how I feel. It’s been staring me in the face for six years, and I somehow didn’t know, but once I did I just… I needed you to know.” You nodded at his words, standing still in front of you on the bed as you swung your legs off and asked him to pass you your nightdress back. You pulled it on over your head as you asked him your next question.

“Why did you run away the other day?”

“I didn’t know it was your brother, Y/N, I should’ve-”

“It shouldn’t have mattered who it was. If you love me, you should fight for me, right? The way you fought for Maeve.” Your tears start falling again as you open the wound that brought you this far.

“Y/N, that was… That was different-” You can hear the panic in his voice as he tries to come up with the words to explain himself.

“Spencer, if.. If it’s different then I think you should leave. If you don’t love me the same way you loved her, then there’s no point starting something.”

“Y/N, please.”

“No, Spencer. I have spent six years of my life filled with nothing but love for you. I wake up and think about you, I go to bed and you’re still there in the back of my mind. My every action is informed by your presence and I am so, so tired. So if you do not feel the same way, you need to turn around and leave this apartment.”

The silence between you is thick, as you stare up at him through your tears, face stern as you push him away.

He gathers his things. Moves towards the door and doesn’t say anything, and just as you’re about to break down, to let the sob burst from your chest in an agonized wail, you hear your front door close behind him, and you’re left alone in the empty apartment, stuck in the purgatory of your love for him, unable to move an inch.

#spencer reid #criminal minds #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid smut #mgg #criminal minds fanfiction #criminal minds fandom #spencer reid x self insert #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid angst #criminal minds angst #spencer reid x reader smut #spencer reid x you #maeve donovan #maturereiding

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greg-montgomery · 1 year

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Ivy - Part 6

gif by: @hotch-girl <3

Aaron Hotchner x Fem!Reader (Sean Hotchner x Fem!Reader)

Series summary: Your relationship with your boyfriend, Sean, is going great. Well, that is until you meet his older brother, Aaron.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5

Warnings: this chapter is nsfw - 18+

Minors DNI

Chapter summary: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) lmfaooo

♡ ♡ ♡ ♡

Relief was such a wonderful feeling.

You were smiling and breathing again; because he was.

“Wild horses, sir. Just...wild horses,” you heard Garcia say. You were so grateful for her. Seeing her hugging him and giving him a kiss on the forehead made your heart swell. Aaron deserved to be loved like this.

She turned around and her smile grew even bigger when she noticed you standing on the door. Your hand was soon in hers. “I’ll call everyone. Sean too,” she said. You had sent Sean home, knowing he was running on a few hours of sleep. “You go to him,” she added.

Penelope winked at you and you wondered if she knew. You didn’t mind.

“Two minutes. I left for two minutes,” you said, walking towards his bed.

“Sorry, I needed some peace and quiet waking up,” he replied.

“I knew you did it on purpose.”

His laugh was weak, but genuine.

You sat on the chair next to him, but pulled it closer so it was almost attached to his bed.

Aaron lifted his hand to touch your cheek with his fingertips. “What’s that?” he said softly. “Have you been crying?”

You placed your hand over his and kissed his palm. “Of course I have. I didn’t know if you’d be okay.”

“As if I’d ever leave you,” he whispered.

“It was so scary. I’ve never had anyone I lo-” you held yourself back and stumbled over your words. “Anyone close to me,” you corrected yourself, “In a hospital before.”

“I’m sorry you had to go through that, sweetheart,” he said.

“I’m sorry you had to go through that.”

Aaron let out a heavy sigh and spoke again. “Y/N?”

“Hm?”

“Could you do me a favor?”

“Anything in the world,” you smiled.

“Jack is coming. I hate that he has to see me like this again. Can you please stay? You’re a comforting presence to him and I think it would be good for him to see you here too.”

“Aaron, of course.” Of course.

You stood next to Jessica, watching the way Jack clung tightly to his dad. Their bond was special, and you supposed that Haley’s passing had only made it stronger.

When they broke their hug, Jack made himself comfortable next to Aaron, his short legs hanging off the side of the hospital bed.

“Aunt Jess,” he said and pointed at you. “This is Y/N. She’s my other aunt!” he added with pride.

“Oh, the famous Y/N. He talks about you a lot,” Jessica said and offered you a kind smile.

“It’s so nice to finally meet you,” you said, shaking her hand. “I wish it was under different circumstances.”

Leaving Aaron alone with Jessica to give them some privacy, you ended up with Jack on your lap. Your hand was playing with his blond hair as you were chatting with him.

He had many questions and you couldn’t blame him.

“Is daddy in pain?”

“Not anymore,” you said. “The doctors made him okay.”

“Then why is he still in the hospital?”

“It’s because the doctors have to make sure he stays okay.”

“But is he coming home soon?”

“Of course.” You left a sweet kiss on the top of his head to comfort him.

“Will you come with us?”

“I’m sorry, my angel, I can’t. I have to go home to uncle Sean.”

Jack pouted and rested his head on your chest. “I wish you were daddy’s girlfriend instead.”

Sean insisted on picking you up from the hospital himself.

You found him outside, leaning on his car and bringing a cigarette between his lips.

He was wearing a black leather jacket. And he looked good. He looked like a bad boy out of a movie.

It reminded you of your first date. That was exactly how he had been waiting for you outside of your house that night. Back then your heart was beating like crazy.

This time, your heart was just sad.

He took a drag of his cigarette as you approached him. “How is he?”

“He’s gonna be okay,” you said.

“Are you okay?” You couldn’t tell whether his tone was caring or passive aggressive. “Now that you saw him awake?” he added.

You weren’t sure what to reply.

“You were pretty upset.”

“I hate hospitals,” you simply said. It wasn’t convincing. He pretended that it was anyway.

You wanted nothing more than to be there for Aaron when he returned home; to take care of him, cook for him, hold him…

But after that short conversation with Sean, you felt like you were walking on eggshells around him. Especially when it came to his brother. You couldn’t risk sneaking out. Not that soon.

So you went back to the thing you and Aaron knew how to do best: phone calls.

The problem was they weren’t enough. They never were.

And now some time had passed and Aaron had already returned to work and you still hadn’t seen him.

“I was just now thinking of you,” you said, answering your phone.

“Hey,” Aaron said. Just one word from his mouth was enough for you to decide what kind of mood he was in.

“Tough case?” you asked.

“Yeah. Just needed to hear your voice.”

“I wish I was there to hold you,” you whispered. You didn’t hide your thoughts from him anymore.

“Come to me then,” he simply said.

“Aaron, don’t say things like that to me because I’ll do it,” you warned him.

“I want you to.”

There was a moment of silence and you had both made up your minds.

You hopped in the shower before wearing your prettiest underwear. Something inside you was telling you that you were gonna be doing more than just hold him.

Aaron opened the door and a second later you were in his arms, his lips pressed against yours.

“We’re alone,” he murmured against your mouth.

“Good,” you said and let him lift you up in his arms, wrapping your legs around his waist.

He was strong again.

“I’m not hurting you, am I?” you asked him as he led you to his bedroom. It was more teasing than concern. You knew he was okay, he reassured you about it every single day.

“Don’t worry,” he said and softly laid you down on his bed. He crawled on top of you and looked into your eyes with a smirk. “I’m healed. And I can finally fuck my baby the way she deserves.”

His lips were finally on yours again and you pulled him close to your body using both your hands and legs.

“Need you…” you whined.

“I’ll give you everything,” he said. “Everything.”

You helped him out of his clothes and he did the same until you were both in your underwear.

He kneeled between your legs, looking at you, staring and admiring. You had never felt prettier than you felt that moment under his gaze.

“I bought them for you,” you said, running your hands over your chest and down to your panties.

He smiled.

“He’s never seen them.” You didn’t need to say his name for him to understand you were referring to Sean.

He leaned in and kissed your lips. “Good girl,” he said and your tummy felt funny.

Aaron started pressing kisses against your cheek and then your jaw, your neck, your collarbone, your stomach…until his face was between your legs.

“Are you wet?” he asked.

“Yes.”

He mouthed you over the fabric of your lingerie. “You were just as desperate the first time I touched you,” he said. He lifted his gaze to look at you, removing his mouth from you for a moment.

You held back a whine at the loss of contact, as if it would cover up the desperation he had just mentioned.

“Can I take them off, baby?” he asked sweetly.

You nodded your head and he grabbed the sides of your panties, pulling them down.

Aaron was taking his sweet time and the anticipation was killing you.

“Aaron…” you said with urgency.

He wrapped an arm around your thigh and brought it over his shoulder. “A bit impatient, aren’t we?”

He left a few kisses on the inside of your thigh. You thought that he was trying to drive you crazy – and even though he was doing just that– you soon realized that he was simply trying to savor every moment of your first time.

The feeling of his tongue on you made you arch your back and shut your eyes. Your hands went immediately to his hair, tugging at it at every wave of pleasure that went through your body.

Aaron’s hands were gripping your thighs, and you would be worried about your skin bruising if you weren’t feeling so damn good.

You opened your eyes to look at him. Seeing his black hair between your legs reminded you of your first fantasy about him.

“Fuck…” you moaned at the feeling of him sucking on your clit. “Mm Aaron…”

His hands went to your bra, cupping your tits; your nipples hardening under his touch.

“Take it off,” he ordered and you did without wasting a second. His hands grabbed them again.

Aaron moaned with you - his voice muffled since his mouth was occupied – and that was exactly what you needed to finally let go and cum against his tongue.

He gave a last long lick to your pussy that ended at the beginning of your stomach and then he kissed his way up to your neck. “You’re perfect.”

You cupped his face and made him look at you. “I want you finally inside me.”

His lips were shiny and it was all because of you. You couldn’t resist tracing his lips and then slipping your thumb into his mouth. Aaron sucked on it and then took it out of his mouth, kissing the pad of your finger.

“I want you so bad,” you admitted. “I’ve never wanted anyone like that before.”

“Me neither.”

Soon he was out of his boxers and with a condom in his hands that he had just grabbed from his nightstand.

You stared at him as he put it on. You wanted to see him, observe him, memorize him. You could finally see all of him. That was all you ever wanted, to see and know all of him; know the man that was so closed off and serious, in ways everyone else didn’t. You weren’t the first woman to see him naked but maybe…maybe, you hoped, it was different with you.

He towered over you and lowered himself to kiss you. You wrapped your hands around his neck, deepening the kiss. You could feel his cock pressing on you and it made you even more impatient so you used the heels of your feet to push him closer to you.

“Now, Aaron,” you said.

He pressed a soft kiss against your forehead and suddenly he was inside you.

You were moving slowly at first, his hand was wrapped around your neck but not with the intention of chocking you but more to keep your face in place so he could keep staring into your eyes.

You never knew you could love eye contact that much.

Aaron then grabbed your hands and pulled them over your head so he could intertwine your fingers. You kept looking at him even though he wasn’t forcing you to anymore. Pleasure looked good on him.

“Go faster. Please,” you said breathless and you didn’t need to ask twice.

“Fuck, it’s so good, baby,” he sighed. “It’s so good, it’s perfect.”

He wasn’t going to last long, it was obvious, but you didn’t mind. You were close too.

“I wish I didn’t have to wear a condom,” he said, his hands now on your hips, pushing you harshly against him. “I wish I could fill your pretty pussy with my cum and make you mine.”

“I’m already yours,” you moaned. “Yours.”

You wrapped your arms around him as he came, wanting to feel as close to him as possible. Your own orgasm followed right after his.

He collapsed next to you and you both turned your heads to the side so you could look at each other.

“Shit,” you said with a weak breath and the two of you started laughing.

He kissed the tip of your nose and threw the condom away as you made your way to the bathroom.

When you came back he was waiting for you with a glass of cold water.

“My prince,” you joked, taking it from his hands and bringing it to your lips. It was exactly what you needed.

Aaron lied down and stretched out his arm, signaling you to join him in bed. You, of course, wanted nothing more than to cuddle with him so you were in his arms in no time.

You buried your face in the crook of his neck, breathing him in. “This isn’t enough, I need to crawl inside you,” you said making him giggle.

“Y/N?” he said, playing with your hair.

“Yeah?”

“I love you.”

“I love you too.” You said it with no hesitation. After almost losing him it was clear to you who your heart belonged to.

“I’m gonna leave him,” you said after a few moments of silence. He didn’t reply so you continued. “I made the decision the moment your lips touched mine for the first time. I was gonna do it the next day I swear.”

He used his finger to tilt your chin up so he could look into your eyes.

“But then he started talking,” you said. “He said all these things about finally being happy. About how grateful he is to have me. And I couldn’t do it, Aaron. I couldn’t. And I hate myself for it, because what I’m doing to him now is much worse.”

“Hey…” he whispered and moved his thumb back and forth against your cheek. “It’s okay.”

It wasn’t. But his voice was so soft and sweet that you believed him. Even if it wasn’t okay, it would be, as long as you had him by your side.

“I’m never gonna leave you alone,” he said as if he had read your thoughts. “We’re gonna figure everything out together. I promise.”

“Why didn’t I meet you first?” you whined, hiding your face on his chest.

“I wish I had a time machine,” he said. “I would walk into that bar the night you met him and I would tell you ‘Hello, I’m Aaron. You don’t know me but I’m saving us from a lot of trouble right now.’ Then I’d pick you up, throw you over my shoulder and steal you away.”

You giggled. “What’s concerning is that I’d show no resistance ‘cause I’d think you’re so handsome.”

He laughed loudly and pulled you so close to him you were on top of his body.

“Is that right?” he smirked.

“Mhm…” you nodded and kissed his lips with a lovesick smile. He kissed you back with the same smile on his face.

Part 7

ivy tag list:

@preciousbabypeter @buckysmainhxe @galaxyofmyown @ssamorganhotchner @romanogersendgame @elhotchner @louderfortheback @northschild @iammirrorball @rousethemouse @kishie8 @save-the-sky @ssacharcoalgrey @realdirectionx @itsmytimetoodream @art-and-thoughts @red-red-rogue @dellalyra @feetgypsy @stella95827 @katieslotherford @jazzymariexoxoc @quietlyignoringyou @justarandommom @sebastiansstanswhore @lelifesaver @aaron-hotchners-girlfriend @whyamihere96 @dadcomfort @redbleedingrosesss @222brooke

#aaron hotchner #hotch #criminal minds #aaron hotchner x reader #hotch x reader #sean hotchner x reader #nsfw.#ivy #hotch 🪐

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stem-sister-scuffle · 2 months

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STEM SISTER SCUFFLE: ROUND 2 MASHUP 3

Ms. Frizzle (The Magic School Bus) vs Penelope Garcia (Criminal Minds)

Ms. Frizzle is a Science Teacher!

Penelope Garcia is a Computer Scientist and Hacker/Programmer!

Why you should vote for each contestant:

Ms. Frizzle:

"*gestures at entire magic school bus series*"

"Embodies the true spirit of scientific discovery: barely-contained chaos."

"She is very knowledgeable about a wide variety of sciences, and uses that knowledge to further the educations of many people. Teachers deserve the world; they do so much for so little in return. (shout out to Mrs. Goates)"

"She loves science and loves teaching kids about science. I love her. Idk I saw she only had one submission and that made me sad so now im here submitting her"

"She is an icon and has cool earrings"

"SHE'S SO COOL!!! She's so smart and so fun and genuinely just an icon. ALSO she has a little lizard on her shoulder. I saw an ask abt the submissions for Ms. Frizzle and the sender was the only person who submitted her.. I couldn't let this go. ALSO one of my professors irl called herself the irl Frizzle and she's a doctor of biology so make of that what you will"

Penelope Garcia:

"My girl steals the show"

"mostly self taught !! was a hacker for awhile !!"

"Cute"

"She supports her team from afar with incredible skill, charisma, and fashion!!"

"Computer science. Cybersecurity. Information security. Cryptanalysis. General hacking and IT. Investigative studies. Garcia is one of those lovely characters who is both herself and also so brilliantly intelligent that they single-handedly make the show a success. She’s girly, wears heels and makeup and loves unicorns and cat videos but she’s also a devious hacker and is willing to do a lot to catch evil serial killers. Welcome to the office of supreme genius!"

#stem sister scuffle #round 2 #ms frizzle #the magic school bus #penelope garcia #criminal minds

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slytherinlesbians · 7 months

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Whumptober 2023, Day 6: Recording/Made to watch/"It should have been me."

fandom: criminal minds | characters: derek morgan, emily prentiss, aaron hotchner, jason gideon, penelope garcia, jennifer jaraeu | ship: none | trigger warnings: none | content: 2x15 revelations, the tobias hankel case, kidnapped spencer reid, team as a family | word count: 507.

Morgan stares at the screen, rage boiling hot and furious in his stomach at the sight of the person he considers his little brother being treated like he’s evil. Like he’s nothing more than a piece of meat. Tortured, drugged, dying. There’s a long list of people Morgan despises in this world. There’s a long list of people he would like nothing more than to kill. Right now, Tobias Hankel trumps every single one of them. He balls his hands into tight fists, digging his nails into his palms to stop himself from punching the screen.

I’ll get him for you kid, he repeats to himself over and over. I’ll kill him.

Emily stares at the screen in horror. She hasn’t known Spencer for long, but she’s always been good at making friends fast. Moving around will do that to you. She knows she’s not quite part of this strange family yet - on the outskirts, perhaps - but seeing Spencer in such pain makes her ache. He doesn’t deserve this. She stays glued to the screen, searching every inch of it for something, anything, that could help them figure out where he is and how to save him.

I’m hunting, Reid, she repeats to herself over and over. I’m searching for you.

Gideon stares at the screen, numb with shock. This is his fault. He has prepared this kid - that’s all he is, a kid - for this job for the last several years, but he could never have prepared Spencer for this. This is all his fault. There’s only one thing he can do now: get Reid the hell out of there. He turns away from the screen, shaking himself out of his stupor.

I’m coming for you, Spencer, he repeats to himself over and over. I’ll get you out of there.

Penelope stares at the screen, tears streaming down her face. Her sweet friend - her first friend in the FBI - her first friend since her parents' deaths - trapped. Tortured. Broken and bruised. She feels utterly helpless, despite the fact she hasn’t stopped working since Spencer was taken. All she wants is to gather him in her arms and never let him go.

I’m right here with you, boy genius, she repeats to herself over and over. It’s going to be okay, sweetheart.

Hotch stares at the screen, unable to breathe deep enough to gather enough air in his lungs. It wasn’t until this moment he realized just how much his youngest agent means to him. He doesn’t think he’ll ever forgive himself if Reid doesn’t make it out of this alive. But despite Spencer’s difficulties in the field, despite his awkwardness and vulnerability, Hotch reminds himself: Reid is strong. Much stronger than anyone ever gives him credit for.

I’m rooting for you, Reid, he repeats to himself over and over again. You’re going to get through this.

JJ can’t look at the screen.

I’m so sorry, Spence, she repeats to herself, over and over. It could just as easily have been me.

It should have been me.

#whumptober2023 #no. 6 #recording #made to watch #“it should have been me.”#criminal minds #fanfiction #spencer reid #derek morgan #emily prentiss #jason gideon #aaron hotchner #jennifer jareau #penelope garcia #the bau #revelations

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dr-spencer-reids-queen · 5 months

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Pleasure Is My Business: Part Two

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Female!Reader

Word Count: ~2.3k

Summary: You’re brought back to your high school days with this case. You put that behind you when you graduated, but life has a funny way of bringing you closer to the person who made your life miserable back then.

Warnings: canon violence, canon language, canon talk of death, methods of kill

Author’s Note: I do not own anything from Criminal Minds. All credit goes to their respective owners. If there are any warnings that exceed the normal death/kills from the show, I will list them. If you’ve seen the show, then it’s the same level of angst unless otherwise stated

Larry was reluctant to send everything over but he did it. So, when you walk into the police station the next morning, Hotch already has all the files on the desk. Spencer is in the break room getting some coffee and you join his side to get the day started with some caffeine.

"Tonight is the first night of the reunion," he says.

"Fine, I'll go for a couple of hours and say hi to everyone. I don't know why they deserve it since all of them treated me like shit. I'm pretty sure they still hate me."

"You're an FBI agent. It doesn't matter what they've done with their lives. You're helping so many people despite what they've done to you. Nothing else matters."

"You're absolutely right," you grin and kiss him.

You two grab coffees for everyone before heading over to the empty conference room. Hotch is already on the phone with Penelope as everyone shuffles into the room.

"This guy is richie-rich. Eighteen cars, six houses, and three boats. Can you even boat in Dallas?"

"When you're talking about that much money, ten grand for a call girl is like deciding where to go for dinner," Emily says.

"I have half a million over here for something called the bat cave, and here's a picture of him as fetish Batman. That is wrong," JJ shudders and shows the picture.

"Is there anything this guy didn't like to spend money on?"

"Yeah, his ex-wives. Fielding was married four times. He didn't have prenups in the first two, but he did everything he could to cut off his ex-wives."

"Are there children involved?" you ask.

"Yes, with three of the wives. Hoyt Ashford was married a few times, too, wasn't he?"

"You know, considering that when Kevin takes me to dinner and a movie, he defaults on his student loans," Penelope divulges. "This amount of money is sick."

"What did you find?"

"All three of our dearly departed rich guys were embroiled in bitter court battles over how much to pay in alimony and child support, and even when the court ruled in the wife's favor, these three charmers just decided not to pay."

"Garcia, can you generate a list of high-profile Dallas CEOs who are holding out on their ex-wives?" Hotch asks.

"One loaded losers list, Dallas edition, coming at ya. Penelope out."

"So, why would a prominent businessman who could easily pay child support refuse to?" you ask when Penelope hangs up.

"For this type of overachieving personality, paying money after the marriage ends probably offends him."

"They're spending tens of thousands on an escort, but they won't drop a dime on their wife and kids? That's cold," JJ shakes her head.

"Meanwhile, most prostitutes come from broken homes and she's listening to pillow talk. That could serve as some sort of trigger about how their ex-wives are cheating them out of money, and how their kids are nagging them. It's everything that these men take for granted that she never had."

"Should I assemble the police for a profile?" JJ asks.

"I don't think it's gonna help. She lives in a completely different world than they do. The same thing goes for the news-watching public. The CEOs who sleep with her won't admit to it."

"I couldn't even get past the team of lawyers protecting them," JJ says.

"What if we give the profile to the corporate lawyers? They've cleaned up after her even if they don't realize that they've seen this woman," Hotch suggests.

"Every time we've approached them, they've circled the wagons. What makes you think this is going to be any different?"

"She's putting them at risk, too."

"I'll gather the lawyers."

As soon as JJ gathers the corporate lawyers, your entire team stands in front of them to deliver the profile to them. There are about three dozen lawyers in the room of all different backgrounds. You scan the entire room only to stop at someone you recognize. This man used to go to the same high school as you in Dallas. He ran in the crowd that bullied you the most, though, he doesn't seem to recognize you.

"We're looking for a white woman between the ages of twenty-five and thirty. She's being paid between ten and fifteen thousand per session, and she's very well versed in the world of money and privilege."

"Even though she's a call girl, she doesn't look like one. She could pass as a businesswoman or a co-worker. You've probably written up her personal expenses as losses such as shoes, jewelry, and clothing. Your bosses pay her in cash, but they may also be paying her in other ways like taking care of her, getting her a new car, and even paying for her medical bills."

"She probably didn't grow up with a father figure, and she is now turning that rage toward clients who walk out on their families," Emily adds.

"What's going to happen once this woman is caught?" one of the lawyers asks.

"She'll be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law."

"What about the other men she's sleeping with, the ones she doesn't kill? Will they be prosecuted?"

"Right now we're concentrating on stopping her from killing again."

"That's all well and good, but our employers are going to ask us about the risks involved In cooperating with an FBI investigation," another lawyer asks.

"Tell your employers that the risk is not only a physical one. She's compromising privileged information as well. After she sleeps with these men, they talk to her. It's part of the release they get in seeing her. All that dirty laundry you've worked so hard to cover up, she knows it. As long as she's out there, it's not just your clients that are vulnerable. Your firms are, too," you warn.

"Excuse me," a young woman speaks up from the back. "I'm Allison Barnes. I'm a lawyer at Webster Industries where Joseph Fielding worked."

"This is really not the time," Larry tries to stop her.

"We'd like to hear what she has to say. Go ahead, Ms. Barnes."

"A while back, I looked at some paperwork that Mr. Fielding filed about a penthouse downtown. I asked him what he'd be using it for, and he just kind of chuckled and said it was for a friend. Is that the kind of information you're looking for?"

"Do you have an address?" JJ asks and walks over to her.

"Please heed our warning. We're doing our best to get to her before she strikes again. Thank you."

Before the man you recognize can leave the meeting, you walk up to him with a friendly smile on your face.

"Jason? Jason Gavins?"

"Yeah? Don't tell me I'm in trouble," he jokes.

"No, nothing like that. I'm Y/N. We went to North Dallas High School together. Do you remember me or am I just coming off as creepy?" you chuckle.

"No, I remember you. I'm just shocked that you're here. Wow, it's been a long time."

"How have you been?"

"Good. I can tell by your badge that you've been good, too. Wow, the big FBI, huh? I always knew you'd do something special like that."

"What do you mean?"

"Come on. I'm assuming abilities like yours don't go away over time."

"You're right," you chuckle. "This might be a stretch, but did you happen to get a reunion invitation?"

"Yeah. I think it'll be fun to go for a night. Are you going?"

"Maybe for a few hours."

"I hope to see you there," he flirts.

He leaves just as Spencer joins your side.

"What was that about?"

"He and I went to high school together here in Dallas. He ran with the crowd who bullied me, but I don't think he remembers it."

The penthouse that Allison gave JJ is definitely home to the unsub. She must be staying here in between kills. You enter the penthouse knowing you're going to see the same blue energy, but it's driving you crazy not remembering who it belongs to. This place is too clean to have someone live here, which means she might have a different place to live. An initial sweep doesn't come up with anything out of the ordinary, but after spending some time in the bedroom, a few things pop out at you.

"Do you have anything?" Derek asks.

"No, and she seems too smart to leave a receipt lying around."

"Check this out," you say. You open a jewelry box that houses expensive rings and bracelets. "She's got a lot of high-end designer jewelry here, and then this." You pick up a small ring that's not like the others. "It's way too small to be an adult's. She probably kept it from her childhood."

"It's a purity ring. By wearing it, you promise to save yourself for marriage," Emily explains.

"She broke that promise a long time ago." Derek opens her closet doors only to find a leather suit used for sex. "Hey, Y/N, got a whip?"

"Nah, I'm not into that," you laugh.

"There are antique first editions on the bookshelves," you hear Hotch say from the living room.

"There's nothing identifiable. No pictures or sense of personality. Her lifestyle is completely disposable."

"Well, these aren't just for show." Hotch points to the books. "The spines are cracked. Somebody's been reading these. You know, we profiled that she learned to fake privilege. What if she's not faking it?"

"You're saying maybe she came from money the whole time?"

"Maybe."

The living room phone rings, and for some reason, you know that the call is meant for the FBI. It's like someone knows the FBI is in this room right now.

"Y/N or Prentiss should answer. If it's a customer, she'll get more information out of them," Spencer suggests.

"Unless she's calling in for her messages."

Derek takes out his phone and gets Penelope on the line.

"Yeah, Garcia, we're getting a call to this line. Can you work some magic?"

"I don't have a trap-and-trace in place yet. Give me a few."

"Prentiss, get ready to vamp. She's gonna work it."

The machine picks up the call, patching in whoever is calling.

Hi, it's me. You know what to do.

"Aaron. I know you're up there," the unsub says. "Pick up. Aaron Hotchner."

How the hell does she know who Hotch is? He must have run into her without knowing she was the unsub. Hotch looks at everyone before answering the phone. The machine is still on, so you're able to hear her side of the conversation, too.

The thing is, you've heard this voice before. You know this person. At some point in your life, you've either run into this woman or knew her, but where?

"Hello? I'm at a disadvantage. You seem to know my name, but I don't know yours. Can we start there?"

"I thought I could trust you, Aaron."

"Who says you can't?"

"I want to. I even looked you up online. Is that strange?"

"No. It's flattering to be noticed by a woman like you."

"I thought you were so upstanding. I watched the presentation you gave on school shootings. I found it posted on YouTube. For a moment, I actually thought there were still good people in the world."

"I've disappointed you, haven't I? Just like all the other men in your life who've walked out on their families, who deserve to be punished."

"Did you walk out on your family?"

"No, my wife left me."

"Do you have kids?"

"I have a son."

"How often do you see him?"

"I try to see him every week."

"Do you see him every week?"

"No, I don't get there as often as I want," Hotch sighs.

"I believe you, but don't compare yourself to the men I see. You are nothing like them. You're just another whore."

"How am I a whore? You come when called. You do their bidding. In hotels, you take the side elevator to avoid crowds while the men who pay your salary walk across the ivory marble foyer into their cars, but I'm just frustrating you, aren't I?"

"Garcia, anything?" Derek whispers into his phone.

"I'm on the landline, triangulating the cell. Give me sixty seconds."

"What do you mean?" the woman asks.

"You want to show the world all these bad me, and my investigation's just getting in your way."

"No, Aaron. You're not doing your job!" she yells. Your eyes widen in recognition at the exact moment you figure out who this woman is. You cover your mouth to keep your gasp from getting out. "You don't want to arrest me and don't want me in custody because you're in their pocket. You just want me to disappear, just like they do."

"Truthfully, I'm only interested in finding you. You've been betrayed so many times. You don't know who to trust, and that's why that first murder felt so good. However, each one since has been less and less satisfying. You know that's going to continue. Am I right?"

"Yeah," she whispers.

"Come to me and turn yourself in. I will make sure that you get the help you need. I won't let you disappear.

"If we met under different circumstances, I could believe that. I won't let you cover this up."

A gunshot goes off on the other line before she clicks off. She's killed another man, another victim in her pocket.

"Garcia, talk to me," Derek says.

Penelope got the location of the phone call, but as you suspected, the man, Trent Rabner, was already dead inside his car. The only thing to go off of is the phone call she had with Hotch, and it's only until everyone is back at the station do you reveal where you know her from.

"I know who our unsub is."

"You do? How?" Hotch asks.

"The first time I saw her energy at the office firm in the elevator, I recognized it immediately. I came across this woman at some point in my life. The next crime scene only made me realize not only did I come across her, I actually knew her. Then, I heard her speak over the phone and when she got so angry, it clicked in my head.

"Her name is Megan Kane, and I went to high school with her here in Dallas. I caught her and a teacher having sex which resulting him getting fired. She became the laughingstock immediately. Everyone was talking about it. She got so pissed at me, but our unsub is her. My high school is having a reunion, and I'll put all my money on her being there tonight. One of the lawyers we talked to will also be there. He might have seen her or talked to her. He was one of her best friend's boyfriends in high school."

"Have Garcia get us everything she can on Megan Kane," Hotch says. "Morgan and Prentiss, go talk to the lawyer and see if he knows anything."

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beelmons · 1 year

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Escapade 4

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!BAU!reader Rating: Explicit, readers under 18 are not advised to read this story. Tags: smut, best friends to lovers, possible angst at some point, porn with plot, mentions of weapons, minor OC appeareances for plot purposes, mentions of death for plot purposes, unprotected sex, reader drinks a bit of alcohol. Summary: A new case drops and someone you know is involved. Spencer is there to help you through it. Chapters: 1 | 2 | 3 / 3: Bonus | 4 | 5 | 6 A/N: Repost so it can appear in tags. If you want to be added to the tag list for future chapts, let me know in the comments or my ask! Tag list: @punkndisorderrly

Best thing about sleeping with someone from your same line of work was the amount of understanding they could have for your lack of availability. Being professional, as long as you weren’t under the sheets, was a priority for both Spencer and you. The Missouri case had gone without further issue, and mind you, neither another escapade. UnSub was caught after only three days, families reunited, a good ending to a job well done, as happy as they come. Best part about it all: it was time to celebrate.

—Sorry, guys, I have a date to get to. —Morgan responded when Garcia proposed margarita and nacho night at one of the local Mexican pubs.

—What? You didn’t tell me about that! —Penelope reproached.

—Sorry, mama, escaped my mind. I’ll see you guys tomorrow. —Derek took a second to kiss his best friend’s head before darting out of the ballpen with a wave towards the rest of you.

—God, JJ? —she looked expectantly towards the blonde.

—Sorry, PG, Henry is out with a cold and Will’s got a shift.

—Jesus, I hate mommy duties, although mothers are awesome and real-life heroes that deserve all the respect and love in the world. Go take care of your munchkin and have a good night. —she patted Jennifer on the back, basically pushing her out of the way.

Hotch was locked in his office, and Rossi was long gone since it was cigar club night. Prentiss looked at her with pleading eyes, too tired to voice out any complaints, which Penelope understood the meaning of in no second. She gave her a sympathetic nod and Emily bolted out of sight. Everyone knew a calm night with Sergio was due for her, and well deserved, too, but that meant it was your turn under the Penelope Garcia Polygraph sight.

—I’ve got plans tonight, P. —you answered in a hurry.

—And the holy spirit! —she grumbled in complaint—Of course you do, you are a highly solicited beautiful being. —you crossed puzzled gazes with Spencer at the bizarreness of the compliment she offered— I guess it’s just you and me, boy wonder.

If you were given a wish to have any moment in history turned into a picture you got to keep, you would have asked for Spencer Reid’s face after he heard those words. You hadn’t officially told him, but after being left with the frustration that night in Missouri, when Morgan became the least desired intruder, you assumed you would take the raincheck as soon as you landed back in DC.

—You wouldn’t believe me if I said I also have a date, would you? —Spencer asked Penelope as he fidgeted with the strap of his bag.

—That depends, would you be telling me the truth?

—No. —he answered softly, almost ashamedly.

—Then it’s settled! —Garcia responded with a bright grin— I promise not to have you out so late, okay? Just entertain me for a while, it’s not every day that we get such happy endings, it’s just fair we have a happy night, too.

—Alright.

The smile that crept through his lips defused the annoyance growing within you. It was hard for Reid to say no to Penelope due to having an unyielding love for her, amongst other reasons, so they shortly found themselves at the bar down the street. You walked with them up to a crossroad before you took the bus home. Tiny, trivial problem: you didn’t have any plans. You made the excuse up hoping Spencer would have one of his own and the night would end in either your apartment or his. Perhaps you weren’t as connected as you thought, or maybe his social life was just that sad, regardless of the reason, you were now on your bed laying down with your eyes fixed on the ceiling, bored out of your mind.

Few blocks down the road where your workplace was located, Penelope and Reid shared a plate of vegetarian nachos, courtesy of the ethical agricultural practices enthusiast, and downed a couple strawberry margaritas.

—I swear, three days, I mean, it’s gotta be some sort of record, right? —Penelope gushed about their recent solving.

—Our shortest has been two days, twelve hours, and thirty-four minutes. Ten hours, actually, and five minutes if we don’t count the briefing meeting and jet ride.

—Still, you guys did an excellent job. Who would have thought something as happy and colorful as a balloon would inspire someone to kill? And most importantly, how do you figure out something like that?

—Hotch gave me the credit for the breakthrough, but I had help. —he clarified, and rightfully so, since the idea of a balloon fetishist being the UnSub had occurred to you before he modified the profile based on that assumption.

—Ah! —she exclaimed excitedly— that’s right, that little partner of yours is a real smart cookie, and pretty too, the guy she ends up with is going to be incredibly lucky.

—Right. —something in Spencer seemed to dim at her words and the pursing of his lips, which always gave him away, didn’t fail to notify Penelope.

—Aw, don’t worry Reid, you’re always going to be her true love.

—What? —he almost stuttered as he asked, genuine surprise in his voice—What do you mean?

—It’s like me and Derek, right? Sure, he has all these women, but who does he love more than anyone else? —she made a pause to point at her entire person— There’s just something about the bonds we create in that office, what starts in the BAU remains forever.

Spencer was about to contribute to the statement, until a familiar voice interrupted his train of thought.

—Please don’t say that Penelope, it would mean the bet I made with Prentiss regarding the fourth Mrs. Rossi will go on for an eternity. —you barged into the conversation.

You could see the way the woman’s face lit up, her hands clapping together as she watched you approach the table. You were walking from behind Spencer’s seat, they had chosen a booth, so his head had to tilt upwards to catch your face. You motioned for him to slide further against the wall to leave space for you to sit down, which he gladly did; you made sure to set the jacket you had just removed on your right thigh, the one that was grazing Reid’s, as you took a seat next to your partner.

—What are you doing here? —she asked with particular joy in her tone.

—Got stood up. —you shrugged off the question nonchalantly.

—No way! —she exclaimed a bit too loud, possibly the margarita’s doing— Do not worry my sweet child, his loss, we will make sure you forget all about him. I’m getting us another margarita round.

Although he wanted to object to the idea, being that he wasn’t that fond of drinking until passing out, Spencer was left with his mouth open as Penelope dashed outside the booth and toward the bar on the other end of the establishment. There was a minute of silence as you looked back at Reid only to find that his eyes had landed on you first, he furrowed his brows briefly and licked his lips, you knew he did that when he struggled with finding words.

—I’m sorry you got stood up. —he said.

—Reid, I didn’t have any plans. —you couldn’t help but laugh quietly at the obliviousness of the man before you—I made them up thinking we were going to pick up where we left back in Missouri.

—Oh. —his tone was disappointed— yeah, I didn’t get the hint.

—No joke. —you smiled reassuringly in his direction—We could still get out of here, though, maybe back to my apartment?

You made sure to lock eyes with him as you let out your sentence, your hand travelled to the side, caressing the thigh that was closer to yours on a place that was certainly not appropriate for coworkers. The touch made him flinch and his hand was quickly on your wrist, causing it to stop your movement.

—Are you crazy? —he whispered—If she sees us, we won’t hear the end of it.

—God, all right. —you grumbled, retracting your hand.

He was right, you hated that about Spencer, he was always right. However, something you would soon come to find out, he was also always horny ever since you started your little arrangement and he seemed to be feeling more confident and daring, too, a rare combination of attitudes when it came to the young doctor. As you moved your hand back, his didn’t stay put, he swiftly moved to tug on your middle arm, forcing you closer to him as he whispered into your ear.

—We’re going to make Garcia company for a couple more margaritas, we will escort her back to her place, I will offer to do the same for you like the gentleman that I am, and we’re going back to your apartment so I can behave like anything but, got it?

His face was so close to yours you could feel his hot breath brushing the side of your neck. His grip wasn’t hurtful, rather commanding, and the way his voice lowered to mutter such words had electric shocks sent throughout your entire body. A smug smile drew across his face at your shocked expression, if he was doubting his sexual skills a few days back, you couldn’t find any trace of hesitation now. But it was nice, the confirmation that the burning desire to be with him again was not one-sided.

—Sorry to be back so quick, —the words from Penelope, whom you didn’t even notice approaching the table as you focused on the instructions your partner was giving you— and I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but Hotch needs us back in the office.

—You have to be fucking kidding me.

Two astonished pairs of eyes landed on you. You didn’t mean to say that out loud, if you were being honest, but your frustration was growing uncomfortably fast, and there just seemed to be so many obstacles for you to have Spencer’s balls in you, something you desperately wanted. You backed your reaction with an explanation on how the night was not going the way you had planned, and Penelope seemed to understand. The three of you walked back to the office as Garcia explained you some details of the case Hotch had emailed her beforehand. You were the first to arrive back to the round table and earned a heartfelt apology from Aaron for making you come back so fast, couple minutes later Rossi walked into the room with a strong smell of Cuban cigar and an annoyed look on his face, followed by Jennifer and Emily who looked like death itself had taken pity on them from how tired they seemed, and shortly thereafter Derek joined you with mere disappointment in his eyes. He took his seat, defeatedly, next to you.

—Feel you. —you muttered for his ears only—Didn’t get any tonight either.

—See, the reason I look so pissed is not because I didn’t get any, it’s because I got half.

You let out a quiet ‘oof’ in solidarity and decided to pat his shoulder. Derek was sitting on your left while Reid remained on your right, apparently unaware of your interaction with your mutual coworker.

—I’m aware some of you had other commitments, and I do apologize for making you come back in such a rush, but the director has asked personally for our help, and this case needs to be handled with outmost secrecy.

—And why is that? —David asked.

—Because it involves deceased FBI trainees.

Hotchner’s tone was as stern as ever, and you could hear the quiet gulps everyone let out. Each member sitting around the table had been a cadet once, a justice-filled kid with ambition to take over the world, it was unsettling, to say the least, to picture such dreams turned to ashes because of a serial killer.

—There are two dead and two missing so far—Garcia took the controller away from Hotch when she noticed him struggling with the button—Dylan Parker, 28, was found hanging from his room in Philadelphia, initially presumed suicide until forensic evidence showed no trace of rope fibers on his hands. Andrea Rogers, 27, alleged car accident in Norfolk, alcohol levels were high but there was no sign or residue of alcohol in her mouth or throat. As for the missing agents, there’s Carlos Gonzalez, 28, last seen leaving the FBI building here in Quantico-.

—He looks familiar—JJ interrupted.

—He works as a desk clerk in human resources a couple of floors up, Dylan Parker is an archivist for the Intelligence and Research branch in Philadelphia, and Andrea Rogers was a data analyst for the criminal justice information services located in Norfolk. None of them with high-risk jobs or sensitive information to have extorted. Who’s the last one, again? —Reid offered an explanation of his own, earning a playful glare from Garcia who was trying to finish her presentation.

—Right on the money, baby genius, and if you don’t know the last victim’s name it’s because I, in fact, have not told you yet. Conrad Smith, 28, he’s a Virginia P.D. desk clerk in D.C. who was reported missing by his soon-to-be ex-wife when he didn’t show up for court last week.

—Hold on, you said the connection was that they were FBI trainees, but this Conrad guy isn’t even in the bureau, why is he involved in the investigation? —Morgan barged in.

—None of them are actual agents, they are all administrative staff —Emily contributed.

—The connection is not referring to their current occupations, rather, it refers to what they went through previous to obtaining their current jobs.

—They all completed the FBI Academy training program but weren’t hired as Special Agents. —you finally spoke.

There was something about your tone that snapped everyone’s attention to you, and it certainly piked their interest when your eyes seemed to tremble at the picture of Officer Smith. Hotch took a mental note of your reaction, and the silence was starting to become awkward and tense. You were thankful for the way Spencer distracted everyone with his following statement.

—Judging by the ages, they must have crossed paths in the academy, which means it is likely that our UnSub also went to the academy during the same period or he’s part of staff or faculty. —his eyes would switch between the team and you as he spoke.

—That’s the reason why this must be handled internally, it would affect the credibility and reputation of the bureau if word got out that there’s serial killing happening within the domains of the main office. Garcia, do background checks on every staff member working at the academy, classroom teachers, tactical trainers, even dorm monitors and cleaning staff. Reid, I need you to build a geographical profile for the attacks, we need at least an idea of where the UnSub lives, otherwise we have no real lead. Dave, take Prentiss to the local M.E., we are running an independent autopsy on the bodies of Dylan Parker and Andrea Rogers to see if there’s anything that initial reports might have missed. The rest of us will interview family and friends of the victims, they are driving in as we speak. Get to work.

At the boss’s commands everyone scattered from around the table. You were the first one through the door, your stomach felt queasy, as if something was swirling within you. You walked decisively past your desk, only dropping the file in your hands as you did so, and towards the kitchenette, as you arrived you took a second looking anxiously in every direction, had you really seen what you saw? You placed your arms around your stomach to soothe yourself as you continued to pace around the limited area while deep in thought.

—Hey —A familiar voice by the entrance made you flinch in your place. You hadn’t even realized that Reid had followed you the instant you left the meeting room— You okay?

—I’m fine. —your voice broke slightly at the affirmation

Reid simply stood there, watching as you fidgeted with your blazer and a hurt look in his eyes.

—Where do you know them from? —he dared to ask, noticing the surprise on your face at his inquire he decided to explain his reasoning—Your shoulders dropped, you are hugging yourself, which is a sign or self-comfort, and you just…—he made another short pause to clear his throat—you look sad, and I’m worried.

You weren’t sure if it was the way he always showed up when you needed him, or that he could read you like you were a children’s book, or simply the fact that one of your old friends from the academy was missing with the possibility of being murdered, but your chest felt so heavy, so tight that the only relief was to cry. Your tears started rolling down your face before you could even notice; Spencer took a couple of doubtful steps towards you, arms slightly spread to his sides, and only engulfed you into a hug once you closed the gaps between your bodies. You sobbed gently into his shoulder as he patted your head soothingly.

—I hadn’t seen Conrad in three years, even when we promised to stay in touch, —you mumbled against the fabric of his vest—the rest of them, I didn’t really know them well, but we shared some classes and were paired up in practice runs at Hogan’s Alley, the tactical training field.

After finishing your sentence you pulled back slightly, enough to be able to look at him in the face, but not for his arms to fall from your body, instead he loosely let them rest on the area of your waist, as he had familiarly done before during more intimate meetings.

—There is a possibility he’s still alive. —he tried to reassure you.

—There’s also a possibility we just haven’t found the body yet.

Your head dropped at the thought, if there was something as beforehand grief you were certainly feeling it at that moment; families, friends, they cling to hope, innocent minds can’t comprehend the reach of evil, but you knew, you knew what could happen, what probably already happened. As you were buried in a spiral of pain, you felt cold fingers against your chin forcing it up. Spencer made sure to look you dead in the eye as he spoke.

—Do you trust me? —he asked.

—Of course. —you answered with a confused tone, unsure of why such question would arrive now.

—Then believe me when I say we’re going to do everything we can to find him.

His face had gotten so close you could have sworn he was going to kiss you, his eyes travelling from yours to your lips and back. Your heart was pounding so hard into your chest, but what for? This man had seen you naked in more than one sense, what was there to be nervous about? Before you could find your answers, the sound of steps approaching caused you to separate hurriedly. You jumped back to create more space between the two of you, and as soon as you did, Hotch’s figure appeared. He took a second to read the situation, noticing how both of you seemed to focus on anything but his stare.

—Something the matter? —you asked to avoid a questioning from him.

—I need to see you in my office, immediately.

You nodded in response and followed after your boss without a further word, but that sentence would make anyone nervous no matter the time or place it was said. When you were finally behind the walls of his office Hotch poured a glass of water and signaled for you to sit down on the guest chair, leaving the glass by your side.

—Garcia has confirmed that all the victims were in the academy during the same period of time, she also found out that another two members dropped out in the same year, which should now be considered part of the victim pool.

—That’s great, but shouldn’t we be telling this to the entire team? —you questioned, and you heard him sigh.

—Your name shows up as part of the graduate class for that same year. I would like to know the nature of your relationship with each of the victims assuming you crossed paths at some point.

—Um… —you nervously stated, still not quite ready to talk about the situation yet— Parker and Rogers, I really didn’t know them well, Parker really had issues with handling guns, he would always doubt himself during tactical missions, Rogers was the complete opposite, always struggled on classroom assignments, as for Gonzalez, he was interested in securing a stable job, he just wanted to get into the FBI for the benefits and retirement plan.

—And what about Conrad Smith? —Aaron had that face that you knew well, the ‘I already know, I just want to hear it from you’ face, and through hardships you had learned that it was better for you if you just came clean.

—Conrad was interested in the psychology of the criminal mind. —you admitted— his end goal was to run the BAU one day, he mostly struggled with the social part of it all, he wasn’t very well liked by others. As for the nature of our relationship, we became close friends during the training period, and remained as such, but I hadn’t reached out to him for around three years.

—Do you know the reason for their departure from the academy?

—No. —you shook your head—There was a rumor about issues with the final tactical test, but Conrad never really told me what happened. It wasn’t until a day before the ceremony that he told me he wouldn’t be attending.

—Alright. Anything else I should know? —he looked at you expectantly, and you simply shook your head. He took a second to look at you, who was still a bit restless from the news, before he spoke back up—If you wanted to retreat from the case, I would understand.

—No fucking way, Aaron—you snapped resolutely at him.

—Okay. Check in with me every once in a while, cases with personal attachments can become difficult and you could accidentally endanger yourself, or the team. Reid will shadow your interviews, and you are not to go anywhere without him, understood?

—A babysitter? Really, Hotch? —you scoffed with an offended tone.

—No. —yet his was never changing— A friend that will keep a clear head if grief takes over.

Beautiful reminder of the reason you wanted to join the BAU in the first place: Aaron Hotchner. After having him as a guest speaker in one of your classes, you always found fascinating the way he would turn every tragedy he went through into a learning opportunity, and the devotion he put not only in his work, but in protecting everyone around it. You responded with yet another nod of your head and he signaled for your dismissal.

The case was going to be hard, no doubt, you couldn’t remember the last time you felt this stressed knowing someone’s life was in your hands, it was hard to focus on the tasks you were given. Lost in thought, you dropped on the chair by your desk suddenly noticing a sticky note that wasn’t there before.

“Meet me by the parking lot, third floor, row Z, spot 45.”

It wasn’t signed, so you got an eerie feeling from it.

—JJ, has someone been in my desk? —you asked your coworker who happened to be walking by.

—Not that I’ve seen. By the way, I’m taking Andrea Rogers’s dad, Dylan Parker’s brother should be here in about 20 minutes.

—Okay, thanks.

You were intrigued by the text that was now in your hands, so you looked around in search of any clues. Everyone seemed busy, they were hanging to the promise of doing everything they could to find the missing people. Perhaps you were thinking too much, plus who would try to hurt you in the middle of a Federal Law Enforcement Building? You double checked the holster to make sure your gun was on you before headed to the instructed place.

Being almost midnight, the parking lot building was empty asides from a couple official SUVs, a little creepy if you were being honest. On the spot number 45 there was a parked vehicle and you started to approach it slowly, your hand travelled to the handle of your gun, the windows were polarized so you couldn’t see inside even when you tried. The driver’s seat’s door opened, and your instincts kicked in, you unholstered your weapon and pointed it towards the man coming out of the car.

—It’s me! It’s me! —Spencer yelled as he held up his arms.

—Jesus Christ, Spencer! —you yelled back as you put everything back in place— Don’t be leaving cryptic messages like that, I thought you were a hitman!

—Sorry! I figured you would get it was me from the handwriting. —he answered as he got out of the vehicle.

—Next time, just sign it.

You laughed and moved to the front of the car to rest against the hood, Reid followed you, standing right in front, his back against the building’s wall.

—Listen…—he began to talk.

—Reid, I appreciate it, but I really don’t feel like talking about it just yet.

—I know. I called you here because… —he licked his lips nervously— you were there when I really needed to clear my head, I want to do the same for you, I want to be here for you in the same way.

You raised your eyebrows as heat ran through your body knowing full well what he was talking about. Your throat cleared and you examined your surroundings quickly, making sure there was no one around that could overhear.

—I have an interview in twenty minutes, I don’t think we would be able to have a little escapade right now. —you said in protest when he took a step closer and his hands rested on your hips the same way they had been before in the kitchen.

—I went over every maintenance report for the last week, this section has two defective security cameras and have been deactivated for maintenance, but it hasn’t been completed yet, it’s scheduled due tomorrow. Prentiss and Rossi are out at the M.E.’s office, JJ and Morgan already took the interview rooms and Hotch is hiding in his office. We are in the clear.

Without letting you process the amount of information he gave you in such little time your friend’s lips were already on you. You could feel him grip the fabric on your waist with force, but the way his mouth moved was tender in comparison. Your head felt light-headed trying to comprehend what was going on, but your body caught up without hesitation, your arms moved to wrap around his neck while you returned the kiss.

Shortly after, you felt his entire body pressed up against you, if you didn’t know better you would have guessed that the urgency to please you was more about his desire than yours, but you needed this, god, you needed him. His hands soon began to press the fabric of your shirt up in attempt to untuck it from your dress pants so he could feel the skin underneath, the coldness of his fingertips made you shiver and caused a moan to come out. You sensed the smirk forming on his face at the sound, and he wasted no time before his tongue darted into your mouth. As a reflex, you jumped up to be sitting on top of the hood, your hips were at the same level as his and they rolled on their own against his crotch.

The little make out session was just adding to the burning sensation in between your legs and by the hardness in his pants he was having the same reaction. You pushed him back by the shoulders gently forcing the kiss to be broken, which earned a complaint on his side in the form of a whimper; your hands worked quick to undo your pants and he focused on his bottom clothes at the same time, you wiggled on top of the hood to lower them to your ankles, only your underwear remaining on. Reid took a second to move the piece of clothing away and rest it against the hood, the metal was cold, and the contrast felt interesting against your hot skin.

You looked down, eager to see if your anticipation was shared, and you were pleased to see that it was. When he freed his member, you reached out to grab it by the base to give it a couple of experimental pumps, he must have been frustrated because the low groan he let out was music to your ears. Without a word, he moved the fabric covering your core to the side and positioned his tip at the entrance, but before he entered you, he grabbed your legs again and looped them around his middle. His forehead laid on yours, and his eyes stared deeply as he pushed inside you. Aware of the sound you were about to make, his lips attached to yours once again, and your whimper was muted by the now familiar presence of his tongue.

His hips began to move and his palms were pressed on each of your sides against the hood. He was gentle, not doubtful was before, he was taking his time letting you feel every inch of him inside your walls, the quiet groans still being absorbed by your lips. You were tempted to grab his hair, to tug on those locks you loved so much, but you knew too much mess would give you away.

His hands gripped on your hips and tugged towards him, making you fall with your back fully against the hood. You moaned quietly at the roughness of his actions, the new position allowing him to hit deeper within you, you could see him entirely now, how his hips snapped against yours, the frown of concentration in his face, his reddened lips, and it only contributed to your excitement. His pace changed to a quicker one, and his hands decided to explore the front part of your body under your shirt, one of them gave a soft squeeze to your breast over your bra, and he wished he could see you fully naked in that moment, watching them bounce as he pounded into you.

The frustration of not being able to fully show him the pleasure he was giving you was excruciating, forcing yourself to stay quiet, to not scream his name every time the entirety of his cock was inside you, it caused a grimace on your face, and he noticed, one of his hands escaped the inside of your clothes and laid on your cheek instead, the pad of his thumb rubbing against the bone area. You felt your heart pound faster and warmth in your stomach you had long forgotten about. Without thinking, your palm laid on his, and you bit your bottom lip as his hips never ceded their thrusting.

He bent over to land a final kiss on you, his movements becoming slightly erratic, the remaining hand slid down your body towards your intimate parts and his thumb began to rub your clit in circular motions. The combination and the thrill of being in such a public place was enough to throw you over the edge, as your walls began to clench around him you could hear a deep, throaty groan coming from his throat, your nails dug onto the skin of his hand and your legs clenched around his waist when you reached your climax. He gave a pair of additional thrusts until he could no longer hold back, his entire body moved back and his hand held the base of his member, pumping it fast to push himself to reach his own orgasm, and when he did, he turned to a random spot to let out his seed.

You laid on top of the car with a pout in your mouth, Spencer was still panting from his high when he looked back and shot you a questioning look.

—What’s wrong? —he asked with concern.

—Seems like a waste. —you answered, referring to the place he had shot his release on.

He broke into a chuckle and pushed one of your legs playfully after fixing his outfit back up before he took your pants and handed them over. You slid your legs inside the clothing and jumped carefully off the hood of the car, trying your best to remove the couple wrinkles it had gotten in the process.

—Come on, lets head back, there’s work to do —he observed.

—At least now I got a clear head to go on the case.

You walked together side by side and you couldn’t see the bright smile that appeared on his face at your words.

—So, who are you interviewing? —he asked to break the silence.

—Dylan Parker’s brother, I guess Hotch will take Conrad’s mom —you made a pause, and he wanted to inquire about Conrad Smith, but a surprised gasp from your mouth interrupted him— wait, what’s the story for today?

—Oh, don’t worry. I walked Prentiss and Rossi to tell them about specific questions I wanted from the M.E., as for you, I would suggest you say you needed some air and we bumped into the elevator on our way back.

—That genius mind at work is truly amazing. Which reminds me, Hotch wants you to shadow my interviews, you know, just in case my judgement is clouded.

—That’s fine, I have experience babysitting Henry, pretty sure you won’t be a lot of trouble —he joked with a playful tone.

—In your dreams, Reid. —you teased back.

The exchange stopped once you entered the elevator back to the BAU office and there was a warm and loving aura that surrounded the two of you, it was making you nervous, if you were honest with yourself.

—After you. —his inviting voice snapped you out of your trance.

—Oh! Thank you. —You exited the lift with a smile and he followed behind, but before you crossed the main entrance you stopped in your tracks, your hand gripping his arm to make him stand with you— And thank you. —your second ‘thank you’ was softer and sincere, referring to the way he had just treated you.

He replied with an awkward smile and a nod of his head, without any other word he opened the crystal door for you to go in.

—I’ve been looking for you, Dylan Parker’s brother just arrived. —Hotch approached the two of you as soon as you stepped in, sensing an odd atmosphere surrounding you he questioned you— Are you good to do this interview?

—I just needed some air. —you quickly lied— I’m good to go, I swear.

—Okay. —Aaron nodded in response—Reid, I want you to observe, and any field activity that you might run into I want you to go with her, understood?

—Got it.

Without anything further, the Unit Chief drifted back to his interview room, and you felt like you could breathe again. Your mind was clear, and so was your objective. It was time to work hard to find the truth, and you were determined to do so.

#criminal minds #spencer reid #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid fan fic #spencer reid x you #spencer reid x you smut #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x reader smut #spencer reid/reader #spencer reid/reader smut #fic: mine #fic: spencer #fic: criminal minds #i had forgotten the ABSOLUTE FUCKING MESS i had created with this story #hahahaha #i do have plot points and it does turn into something else later #but truth is i got carried away #i have no self control (Y)

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fatalitysficbakery · 1 year

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Nelson’s Sparrow (Gideon’s Song) Spencer Reid x Black Fem!Y/N

Genre: Angst/Fluff.

Warnings: singer!reader, morgan’s sister!reader, tear jerker, grief, learning to deal with grief

Synopsis: Reid takes Gideon’s death hard and it puts an obvious strain on your relationship - one you didn’t know how to fix. Until you did.

↳ ❦ Heavensficbakery navigation menu ❦.

↳ ❦ Heavensficbakery criminal minds menu ❦.

↳ ❝Grief clouds the vision until you push away those that in your heart you know you need need now more than ever.❞⁣ -Unknown

He never could win a chess match against Jason Gideon. With those dark fatherly eyes and a heart all too big for his chest, the organ scarred and marred till it’d grown black and gnarly with the wounds of the things he’d seen.

It didn’t feel to Reid as if his death was real, all the way from the wake to the funeral Spencer drifted through it all as if watching a film. You had never seen your boyfriend so out of it.

He could never win a chess match with Jason Gideon, and even in his absence he still played the game against the ghost of the last father figure he’d ever known. You’d awaken to find him asleep at his desk in the home library; An unfinished chess match on the table.

Your heart clenched each time, a helpless exhausted smile on your face as you wake him up again only for a cold greeting and an even colder goodbye.

“Spencer, you fell asleep again. It’s 8:39. You have work soon”.

With sunken eyes and pale skin, he would wave you off and go to get ready for work during which you still made him breakfast and brewed him coffee. No matter what, you knew you needed to stick by him. You wanted to.

“Spence? You off”?

“Yeah, bye”.

No hugs or kisses had been shared between the two of you in 4 months and yet you never once blamed him. He’d been dragged through hell and back and he still stood tall. You admired your boyfriend more than anyone; His biggest supporter, through and through.

It was too bad Spencer couldn’t see it yet. He didn’t think he deserved the support. In that big ole brain of his, the doctors only idiocies lied in that of emotions.

He could be book smart all he liked. His brain still lacked the sense to know he deserved love. He deserved love and so, so much more.

[❦]

You sit down with Garcia and JJ at a nearby cafe whilst Spencer got much needed rest at home on a rare day off.

You looked worn and tired beyond your years. You nearly wanted to break down when Garcia pointed out how sad you looked.

You voice cracks when you speak.

“I love him. More than the world itself but I, I don’t know what to do. He doesn’t deserve this”.

The cold crisp air hits your sickly pale caramel skin, exposing your cracked lips and dark under eye circles to both JJ and Garcia. They looked on in pity.

You’d always been the bubbly social type, everytime they’d ever seen you at an event? You were the life of the party. The most lively there.

Now you seemed…dull. As if you only saw in hues of grey and off white.

“Have you been taking care of yourself? That’s the first thing you need to do, darlin’. You can’t help Spencer if you haven’t helped yourself”.

JJ squeezes your hand from across the table; Your eyes glaze over tearfully.

“I-I hadn’t thought about it, Jaje. I’ve been so worried about him, I just… haven’t”.

You look down at the now stale bagel on your plate that had been left relatively untouched. You hadn’t much of an appetite lately let alone much worry in your own self care or appearance.

“Tell ya what, Hun. Come to mine for the day! We’ll do a spa day. Ooh! and I’ll make vegan lasagna”!

You laugh through your tears at Penelope’s natural gift of whimsy, her ability to make everything feel okay for a moment.

You smile.

“I’m in”.

••[❦]•••[❦❦]••[❦]•••[❦❦]••[❦]•••[❦❦]••[❦]•••[❦❦]••[❦]••

Your day with JJ and Penelope ended with invitations being texted to the entire team. Keep it lowkey, don’t tell Spencer.

You gripped your purse handle tightly; A home that used to comfort turned into one that brought dread, you felt…lighter when spending the day with Penelope and Jennifer, now you’d have to walk back into a home where love had been paused. A sanctuary that turned into an asylum for the mentally insane. You and Spencer barely speak, both depressed and not nearly in a state to converse with each other let alone the world.

The only comfort you got was that Spencer would most likely be tucked away in his office, playing chess with a ghost or working himself to the bone with little regard for his physical and mental health. Except, that’s not how you found Spencer.

You were sure it was your boyfriend, with the dirty blonde locks and tired eyes, thin from a lack of caring for himself and remembering to eat but…His eyes are sorrowful and they cry. His shoulders bounced with the weight of the wet sobs he let out. You hadn’t seen him cry since the day he’d come back after catching Gideon’s killer, collapsing in your arms and crying himself to sleep. You were his safe space, a home within a home but Spencer knew loss all too well- He hid. Disgusted with himself for pulling you into a dangerous lifestyle, but now… He needed you. You weren’t to abandon a love so beautiful.

“Spencer”? You called out, sighing and dropping your purse down to the couch, kicking your shoes off and walking over to him with the caution of an animal rescuer to a wounded dog. When your hand touched his shoulder, as expected, he flinched away from your touch, you sucked air through your teeth and shook your head, you knew pride wasn’t something either of you needed to fight against right now; sitting in your boys' lap, you wrap your around him and rest his head on your chest, allowing him to let everything out.

“Just let me comfort you, Spence. We’re both tired, don’t fight me”.

He’d been hiding his emotions for so long that his tears drenched the fabric of your sweater, turning the grey colour black.

“Just let me comfort you…”

That’s how the two of you fell asleep, within one another’s arms for the first time in a long time and you wouldn’t lie and say you didn’t miss it. That the feel of his arms around you made your heartbeat in your chest when he’d finally stopped crying; his arms wrapping and tightening around you, exhausted from crying for so long. Not a word was spoken between the two of you but you could tell the air felt lighter, if only for just a moment.

The next day when you woke up you were in bed under the duvet and Spencer was gone. The residue of the feeling of his arms saddened you, you missed him.

↳

“Why are you up so late”? Spencer asked when he came home later that night, his voice, gruff in your ear startled you from your present task, you put down your pen and smile awkwardly, hiding the words under your arm, “No reason, just couldn’t sleep”.

“What’s that”? He asked, pointing to the journal underneath your arm, a grimace settles on your face as you think of an excuse, hoping he doesn’t ask anymore questions.

“Grocery l-list”?

Shit. You were a bad liar, it was your downfall in childhood and adulthood it seemed. You could never lie with a straight face and as Spencer examined you with curiosity you could feel yourself stop breathing, waiting for him to go all profiler on you. A trait you heavily disliked in your boyfriend. Spencer, however, takes note of how desperate you were to avoid this and nods his head, eyes sweeping over your figure once more, the grip on his coffee mug strong, he clears his throat and turns around toward the door, taking one last long look at you, “Get some sleep, Petal”.

The word he left in his wake left you stunned.

Your lean back into your chair, your head was thrown back with, silence and a grin. Petal. He once compared you to the vibrance of a petal just come into bloom, he then pronounced you Petal and it’d been your nickname ever since then. A reminder that in his eyes? You bloom. You were his Petal. You were still his Petal.

[❦]

“Hey, Spence. Um, there’s this thing with the team tonight, just a little dinner…If you wanted to go”.

He looked up and now the good doctor was stunned. You adorn a backless black dress with a jewel chain just over the dip of your back, resting just above your crack, with a black pair of red bottoms on your feet. He notes your full face of glam, your hair which was in its natural dark midnight afro - His favorite hairstyle on you. He wanted to say no, but he recognized something; he recognized your willingness to try, your persistence to save your relationship lest grief draw the two of you apart.

And the one person Spencer Reid loved most was you.

You exhale in relief when he speaks.

“Let me get dressed. I’m a little underdressed, aren’t I? You look…beautiful”.

Your heart swells, smiling softly, “I’ll go start the car, yeah”?

••[❦]•••[❦❦]••[❦]•••[❦❦]••[❦]•••[❦❦]••[❦]•••[❦❦]••[❦]••

At the party, comfortably situated in one of David Rossi’s summer homes was the start of a break-through for you and the doctor, who noted a stage when he came in. The party was for him. He looked over to you with the raise of his brow, you smile guiltily.

“You have people who love you, Doctor. Unconditionally so, and now we’re going to show you that you’re not alone. Hold this for me”?

With a second of handing him your purse, you disappear to the stage and sit in front of a piano; your chosen instrument since you were 16.

“Spencer Reid, Gideon’s Song. Sparrow in a treetop, eyes dark as night, he sings and it don’t stop, he’s got to send a letter…”

When the song starts, Spencer is enthralled, he immediately realizes why you acted so weird that night when he saw your alleged “grocery list”, his eyes are trapped on you with eyes closed and lips just barely touching the microphone; The song sings a story of a Sparrow atop a tree who sings to send a message, a letter to a boy it once mentored in its human life, a boy it thought of as a son; a boy it respected dearly. At the end of the song, it finally reaches the Sparrows boy. The Sparrow's chosen son.

“What’s that”? He asked, pointing to the journal underneath your arm, a grimace settles on your face as you think of an excuse, hoping he doesn’t ask anymore questions.

“Grocery list?

“It reaches his ears, it quiets his fears…The Sparrow’s song…For the Sparrow’s son”. The note is drawn out and high, angelic to the doctors ears as a tear falls from his eyes. He’s surrounded by the people that love him and at the end of the song - His mom is brought in, in a wheelchair, she sits listening to Y/n’s song with her eyes closed, content and adoring the music being brought to her ears. She brought him his mama. God, he didn’t think it was possible to love you more than he did in that moment.

Later that night when it was just he and Morgan talking outside, Morgan smiles at his little brother, patting the younger male on the back.

“You chose a good one, kid. My sister loves you and I know you love her, and you know what”?

“What”? Spencer quirked his eyebrows in curiosity, his hands both in the pockets of his slacks.

“Gideon’s proud of you. We all are, especially Y/n”.

Squeezing his shoulder, Morgan leaves Spencer with something to think about; you come in after him grinning brightly at your boyfriend, “You ready to go”?

Spencer is tall, lanky, within like two steps of a stride he’s in front of you, his lips passionately mingling with yours to your shock but delight. You smile into the kiss, wrapping your arms around his neck and nearly melting into a puddle in his arms.

[❦]

With your legs to your chest, your body drowned in Spencer’s t-shirt, you look at your boyfriend with love and gratitude in your eyes, “Did you like it”?

“Like it would be a bit of an understatement”.

You nod contently, choosing your next words very carefully. You’d lost your sister to lukemia in 2014, she was the one who raised you her entire life, you took care of her up until her eventual death so you knew something of the grief Reid was feeling. You knew it was hard to move forward when losing someone so special to you.

“Do you wanna talk about it”?

“Yeah, yeah I would like that” His adams apple bobs with the knot that appears in his throat thinking of all the emotions he felt. You touch his hand and smile reassuringly, allowing him to speak at his own pace.

“He was the only father figure I knew, he and Hotch trained me, t-taught me”.

“I know, Darlin” You whisper, squeezing his hand.

“It feels suffocating. I’m used to facts and science. Emotions are something I know nothing about and I’ve read book after book on them, articles… This is n-not what I d-”

You move so you’re hugging him, cutting him off as he speaks. He gasps but invites you into his arms without hesitation, the air feels lighter, breathable.

He knows what it means without you speaking. He sighs. One of relief, a weight lifted from his shoulder.

“Thank you. I love you too”.

••[❦]•••[❦❦]••[❦]•••[❦❦]••[❦]•••[❦❦]••[❦]•••[❦❦]••[❦]••

A/N: why couldn’t they just let my mans live off screen in his lil cabin bro? 😀

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darcyfangirlsfrequently · 1 year

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My thoughts and reactions while watching 16.10

Spoilers below

Damn, we starting with ANOTHER flashback? Wait, is this one gonna be Krystall's funeral? I'm gonna cry

Wait no it said 2020, and she's still alive, is this when she tells him she's sick? I will cry

it's gonna be the last time you celebrate your anniversary at all

WORLD'S TINIEST VIOLIN I ADORE HER

This scene is pulling all my heartstrings THIS ISN'T FAIR

Ah shit is Rossi gonna run out of air? Is the air being poisoned?

A profiled delivery scene!!! Have we had those yet this season? I don't think so. I feel like this is a square on someone's bingo card

Did Luke just call Rossi the Unit Chief??? Rossi got demoted in like... episode 3 and is currently supposed to be suspended

Garcia is losing her mind and I know Luke is going to comfort her and I know I'm gonna cry

Is Rebecca going to get her job back> Are they going to try to put Tebecca back together? I don't know how I feel about that

Emily is going off on EVERYONE in this episode and I am here for it

Oh Bailey is so gonna die

"You're definitely the one who likes the gold star" is that what the CME Instagram Bingo was talking about????

Wait, gold star means something. Tf does it mean???

Luke with his hand on the back of Garcia's chair just like old times 😭😭😭

"Why don't Penelope and I coordinate from here" I'm getting Garvez CRUMBS but I am living for it

WHAT IS GOLD STAR

"extralegally speaking" 😂😂😂

The AG, Bailey, and Rebecca working together? I don't like this, although it feels like the AG is manipulating Bailey and Rebecca

IS GREEN DEAD OR ALIVE COME ON TELL ME

Luke filling up her water bottle for her besties i am so unwell

Tyler's only going into surgery now??? That was the big reaction??? Huh???

So far this episode Luke and Garcia have only been calling each other "Luke" and "Penelope" and idk what it is but it pulls on my heart every time it happens

The way he kneels down and takes her arm... it reminds me of "Saturday" 😭😭😭

"Penelope, I don't know, I'm just... but maybe if we lean on each other, we'll have the strength to get through this together." ARE YOU KIDDING ME. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME. THAT IS THE MOST ROMANTIC SHIT EVER. I'M ACTUALLY CRYING. HOLY SHIT HE'S SO IN LOVE.

Well, I can cross "Luke initiates a hug" off my Garvez bingo

I'm sorry, if someone looked at me like that, said those things to me, and then held me like that, I would be falling in love and potentially proposing marriage

"Yeah, we can do that, I want to do that" this sounds like every "I still love you" Garvez fic any of us have ever written

HE DID NOT JUST STROKE HER CHEEK I'M UN FUCKING WELL

"Me and you." I'd love that, actually STOP PLAYING WITH MY FEELINGS

"Have some tea, careful it's hot" LUKE ALVEZ THE WORLD DOES NOT DESERVE YOU

This is going to be a scene I come back and watch an UNREASONABLE amount of times. It added YEARS to my life and soothed a part of my soul I didn't realize was hurting. That might have been the most romantic Garvez scene... I think ever. It's going right up there in my favorites with the asking out scene and the entirety of "Saturday"

"His heart is in the right place" ma'am he's a serial killer

Okat, so Sydney's seen Voit on his phone now, so she knows something is up

Shiiiit she found the dog collar

Go OFF Rossi!!!

Rossi, wtaf are you doing????

Did Rossi set up a bomb to break himself out? If so, legend

L E G E N D

Ohhhhhhhhh nevermind, this might have backfired

The fury in Emily's face... Paget's acting is SLAYING this episode

Luke and Tara playing off each other and building on each other's ideas.. I AM SO HERE FOR IT

Krystall!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I mean I knew she was coming, but I still love to see her. I still do kind of hope she's not the missing character cameo, but if no one else shows up, I will be using her to cross it off my CME bingo

"I've missed you so much" goodbye I'm c r y i n g

Rossi being so accepting of death 😭😭😭

Voit used his mother's maiden name as the new last name for his wife, this will probably end up being key to finding them

Every time I see Garvez working together... goddamn I love them so much

Ooh, we got the whole Voit background

Okay yeah we were all right when we said Will and Bailey are going to get shot and Bailey's going to die. I'm positive of it.

Ah shit Voit just snapped at his wife

Oh shit's about to go DOWN. The cops have arrived and Voit's brandishing a gun AT HIS FUCKING FAMILY

Okay so we have JJ, Will, Luke, and Bailey at Voit's house... and two of them are getting shot. If Luke gets shot I'm going to sob uncontrollably, and if these are my death options, I am also going to sob uncontrollably

Bailey, the best boy in the world (Luke Alvez) warned you, and you didn't listen to him. You should always listen to him. He's always right.

WHAT. IS. GOLD STAR???

I am stressinggggggggggggg

Luke/Will/JJ is not a trio I realized I needed

"Are we sure Bailey and this cat Voit don't have some history together?" I was wondering the same thing, Will

PENELOPE YOU ARE SO STUNNING I'M STILL MAD AT YOU FOR THE BAD CHOICES YOU'VE BEEN MAKING THIS SEASON AND FOR BREAKING LUKE'S HEART BUT THAT OUTFIT IS GORGEOUS AND I ADORE YOU

There are 20 minutes left and still so much needs to happen, idk if there's the time

Oh, Will's getting shot for SURE

Yep, Bailey just got shot, and if I saw correctly: in the head. He's dead. I think we all knew this was coming.

Ah shit, Voit grabbed Sydney before she could escape. Idk if she's making it out of this alive.

Aaaaaaaand there goes Will.

So you're telling me the only reason Sydney is still alive is because Voit used all his bullets? GodDAMN

YES LUKE!!! GO LUKE!!! SAVE THE DAY!!! I LOVE YOU!!!

I completely love that it was Luke who ended up arresting Sicarius. I'm so glad the writers finally gave him his big moment. I would still like to know his backstory, though

Is Voit Mirandizing HIMSELF? Why does that make me laugh?

Tara is doing the I'm-so-mad-my-hair-is-moving power walk and I am HERE FOR IT goddamn she's so stunning

Rebecca I'm going to need you to shut the FUCK UP with your "I feel for you" and just tell Tara what she needs

"I didn't ask for any of this!" Do you think anyone did??????

So are just never going to learn what Gold Star is???

"I'm sorry I hurt you" BITCH YOU HELD A GUN TO HER HEAD AND TRIED TO SHOOT HER

I frankly have no idea how they're going to get Rossi out of this on time

Not how I thought I'd get to cross "a dance scene" off my CME bingo card, but I'll take it.

OH MY GOD IT'S "CHANCES ARE" I'M SOBBING UNCONTROLLABLY

I am not well

Luke's overjoyed, "DAVE?" and his fucking smile I'M CRYING

GODDAMMIT YOU'RE GOING TO RUIN THAT EMOTIONAL SCENE WITH GREENCIA?

Greencia breakup??? Greencia breakup????

"is this heaven" *gag*

"Where we keep hurting each other. Or... where I keep hurting you." GOOD. ADMIT IT.

Okay, I am really glad that she is realizing that Tyler is bad for her and is ending things.

GREENCIA BREAKUP!!!!!!!!!!! FUCK YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Luke placing his hand on the back of Penelope's shoulder as he guides her out of the elevator 😭💗 WAIT I CAN COUNT THAT AS AN ELEVATOR SCENE ON MY GARVEZ BINGO

ROSSI HUGGING PENELOPE AND KISSING HER ON THE CHEEK 😭💗 HE MISSED HIS DAUGHTER (and, okay, @penelopeminded, I will admit that the Rossi/Emily hug scene was also very cute, but I still stand by the fact that Penelope is his favorite)

BAU group hug!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Them toasting Bailey 😭😭😭

garvez scene at the end of the episode??? maybe???

If I hadn't already crossed of "they have a conversation about their feelings" last episode with the date flashback, this scene would have totally qualified

Okay if you try to tell me Penelope wasn't at least a LITTLE heart eyed when she was looking at Luke as he poured them drinks, you're lying. It's getting crossed off the bingo card

"The heart wants what it wants, or else it doesn't care" are we about to get a Garvez confession right now??? Because he said that looking SO IN LOVE WITH HER

"You know Emily Dickinson," she's so impressed (and a little heart-eyed, fight me)

"I know that quote" HE'S STILL IN LOVE WITH HER

Dammit no confession, but he's still in love with her

I'm sorry... they show Garvez... then Willifer... then Tara and Emily??? Are they hinting at something here???

"I don't mean to intrude" ROSSI SHIPS TEMILY

So, I'm guessing "Gold Star" is going to be the plot of the next season

"Oh, WHAT???" (my actual, out-loud reaction to seeing swat people or whoever they are storm the BAU)

Are they breaking Voit out???

Oh god the missing character is about to open that door aren't they

AND WE DON'T GET TO SEE WHO THAT WAS????

Okay, so I'm DEFINITELY going to be watching the next season. I am losing my mind /pos

#Garvez #Penelope Garcia #Luke Alvez #tara Lewis #Emily Prentiss #David Rossi #Jennifer Jareau #will lamontagne #tyler green #doug bailey #rebecca wilson #Criminal Minds #Criminal Minds reboot #Criminal Minds Evolution #CME spoilers

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okimargarvez · 10 months

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Penelope & her men

I think is interesting to consider all the men Penelope dated regardive to garvez situation.

Shane Wyeth

It's the first ex-boyfriend of Penelope we meet. He appears only in 9x12. Shane is her tech mentor, a hacker. He still clearly has feelings for her; he is jealous of her relationship with Morgan. Penelope got herself captured by BAU, to run away from him and ending their relationship. Their vision of life was too different.

Kevin Lynch

He is the second boyfriend of Garcia we meet. Their relationship was long but also complicated, they broken up more than once. He worked (we have no clue to understand what he is doing now) for BAU as technical analyst. He was jealous when she met other men, even if he was involved with another woman.

Sam

He is the third boyfriend of Garcia we meet. We know almost nothing about him, except that they have a past, and they started a relationship that lasted some years. We don't know exactly when they broken up, and the reason either. They have a common passion for music instruments.

Luke Alvez

He is a SSA at the BAU. He asked Penelope out at her farewell party. She accepted, but the date, also for the pandemic situation, didn't go as expected. It was awkard and Penelope took the opportunity to step back. She admitted that there was something between them, but "not like that". He never stopped to have feelings for her.

Tyler Green

He is the brother of a victim. He has tech skills and used it to infiltrate in Sicarius network to catch his sister killer, then sent info to Penelope, forcing her to come back at BAU. At the first they seemed to hate each other, but it didn't last very long. They started a sort of relationship, that Penelope ended when she finally realized that it was wrong for many reasons.

Just two of her men aren't hacker, Sam and Luke. It's probably a case, but they are also the only two that treat her well. The relationship with Sam is the only one of Pen that we can't consider wrong, toxic, etc. Sam seems a good boy, he is nice, not jealous of Kevin or Morgan. He just can't understand why she has to go to Baylor in jail. Luke has some computer skills, we can guess it in some episodes, especially in CME, but it's because he is just really smart. He is clearly in love with Penelope since the beginning, he could have forced her to realize that she feels the same for him, but never did it. It's not like him. He is also unable to get angry with her, for more than 3 seconds (see 16x9). But he did his own mistake, when he lied about Phil feelings for her (and viceversa). Should we also add Jason Clark Battle (alias James Colby Baylor) to the list? They dated, one time. Penelope considered him attractive. All of this to say that she had a type, or attracted a certain kind of man, with which she had difficult relationship, passionate but also wrong, even on her part. Like when she used her hacker techniques to not let Kevin go away, or her responsability in the story with Tyler... She admitted that the relationship with the last was wrong, right with Luke in their last scene of S16 together.

Maybe this background could be part of the reason why she seems so scared about a possible romantic story with Luke. He is so kind, so good... does she deserve someone like him? She can easily answer "yes". But then. What if they work, what if they pass from the "I'm in love with you" phase to the "I love you, deeply love you" one? What if Luke becomes her world? And then... what if all of this ends? How could she survive? So, it's better to let it go.

Obviously this is just my opinion and theory.

All my ramblings

#garvez #criminal minds #cm #penelope garcia #luke alvez #luke x penelope #penelope x luke #garcia x alvez #alvez x garcia #penelope garcia x luke alvez #luke alvez x penelope garcia #shane wyeth #sam #kevin lynch #tyler green #criminal minds evolution #criminal minds reboot

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f0linasahl0 · 19 days

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you know i have too many thoughts but i can't seem to place them well enough to make a single post.

like i'm just thinking about (multi fandom thoughts god save me):

-dustin and steve's friendship and how genuine it is. same with robin and steve. idk i think steve is just a good guy when around good people.

-thinking about how dustin was wearing rings in a stranger things teaser im literally going to break down

-thinking about how tyler's singing voice changes through each album. like idk how to explain it other than that. it's just good

-thinking about how draco malfoy deserved more than what he got. he deserved a better family. a chance at being an actual kid rather than caring about his family's image

-thinking about spencer reid. just spencer reid. loml

-there's so many songs i'd be so excited to hear on the clancy world tour. so many songs i'd break down to. so many songs that if they skip it i'd actually be heartbroken.

-thinking about how penelope garcia held that fucking team together shut up. she was the glue that held the bau together argue with the wall.

-still thinking about how fucking broken tyler looked through the livestream experience. how clancy was a puppet for the bishops through SAI. imagine how horrifyingly humiliating that would be. a man who tried so hard to fight something like that just to be the poster boy for it.

-still wondering what jenna and debby's roles are. like sure that's not a big thing but i care about it i wanna know where they are in the lore. like even if it's not meant to be something big id like to know

-i think i ended up liking draco malfoy as much as i do is because looking past the little boy who's a bully, look at his family bro. he had no choice in what he could be. his character is more complex than initially thought

-harry potter, as much as he deserved to be, was so whiny some times 💀. ron is just whiny in the later books. like come on you think this kid who's gone through hell wants to keep going through hell for some money?? ronald come on calm your tits and talk to him. just that whole fight in goblet of fire could've been avoided if he just talked to his friend. like you fucking think he wanted that ronald?? calm down.

-there's a few characters that if they die in s5 of stranger things im literally going to break down. specifically dustin, steve, and robin. if they die--dude like absolutely not

-peter parker you deserve the entire world you deserve everything. all the peter parker's in the marvel cinematic universe and marvel comic universe. literally i--UGH

-there's a few twenty one pilots songs that while i listen to them i specifically remember the music video and i think that's really funny. to note, some of them are stressed out, lane boy, somewhat fairly local, house of gold, guns for hands, i just remember the livestream ones for shy away and choker, there's so many but like--there's parts that remind me of the mv

-i don't think i ever hated SAI i just distanced from twenty one pilots in 2021 (which honestly was the worst time for me to do so but here we are) and thinking i disliked SAI was better than turning away from the band that probably saved my life from further depression and instead turning to dumbass minecraft youtubers that ended up just being awful awful people. i hate that. i hate that i was so awestruck by these mcyts that i didn't think about how bad they could've been. SAI is a good album i just never got into it like i am now and that makes me feel so sad. i don't want to be one of those "oh you just came back because the lore said this album was...blah blah blah" like okay thanks for the words and shit i don't really care let me LIVE

.....

anyway those are some various thoughts. idk what else to put anymore so enjoy this thought dump i guess 🤷

this is what i mean by multifandom i like too many things 💀

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ddejavvu · 9 months

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we interrupt your regularly scheduled programming - making friendship bracelets!!!!!!!!! Wouldn’t that be so fun or is it just me also who do you think would actually wear them/keep them if you gave them one. and congratulations!!!!!!! you deserve the world<3

join my 20K celebration!

'we interrupt your regularly scheduled programming...' - pick an activity to do on the jet on the way back from a case, and i'll tell you which member of the BAU i think you'd get along with!

i think you'd get along best with penelope!! you two could craft and gossip alllll day long, plus every time you get off the jet you've got a new bracelet for her and she's so excited 'cause she made one for you too while she wasn't super busy :')

hotch would keep his but i don't think he'd wear it, he'd tuck it into a pocket in his gobag or he'd put it on his desk by a picture of jack. rossi would also not wear it but he's really really touched by it, so he keeps it in his pocket! derek does wear it, but he tries covering it with his sleeves or tucking it away when he's interrogating someone 'cause he doesn't want them to make fun of it :') jj wears hers, prentiss wears hers, and garcia wears hers ofc, they're definitely more open about them, and i think reid would either wear his all the time, or tuck it around the strap of his messenger bag like a little charm !!!

#mei's mail #mei's 20k celebration !!

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andmineisyellow · 1 year

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We need to talk about Tyler.

I have a bit of a hot take, which is that I think Tyler comes off wildly more sympathetic than Garcia in 16x09. And the reason for that is Tyler's motivations have been clear and consistent from the beginning, whereas Garcia's motivations feel weak and inconsistent.

The shorter post below will focus primarily on Tyler, but I plan on diving deeper into the errors the show has made with Penelope after the finale airs and we have the full picture. And to be clear, the intention of that post will not be to hate on Penelope, but rather discuss where I think the writers went wrong with her characterization and how they should go about fixing it in Season 17.

Tyler makes a lot of bad choices in 16x09. He lies to Garcia and I don't know much about the law, but I'm pretty sure he was obstructing an investigation by phishing and tracking a federal agent's phone. That said, I can at least understand Tyler's behavior. He had a very clear trauma response to seeing Elias' photo. He has spent over a decade trying to find the man who murdered his sister. It's not shocking to see Tyler behave this way. It is a very obvious cry for help. Help that Garcia can not give him. Garcia's love is a band-aid. It made him feel good for awhile, but with the kind of wounds he has, he can not simply cover them up. He's been in pain for so long, he needs to figure out how to heal, and that's really not something that Garcia can do for him.

Tyler needs help. He needs healing. And as Garcia said to Derek previously, "[He's] so sad, and so confused and angry and desperately looking for anyone to swoop in and make it all better. And unless you're all in and can be there for [him] for every stage of the grieving process your just another reason for [him] to not trust the world."

I don't like the way Tyler treats Garcia. I don't think he's a good match for her. And I do believe there should be consequences for his actions. But I also don't think he is a bad person at his core. He's a person who has experienced an extreme amount of trauma and deserves the opportunity to heal properly.

#criminal minds #criminal minds evolution #criminal mind spoilers #penelope garcia #tyler green #thought bubble #criiminal minds 16x09 #notbridgerton

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spencersweatervest · 2 years

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BASIL [ONE-SHOT]

character(s): the bau, spencer reid, jennifer "jj" jareau, emily prentiss, aaron hotchner, derek morgan, david rossi, penelope garcia, a cat named basil

tags: autistic spencer reid, autistic penelope garcia, animals, i just think they deserve a treat after all they've been through, autistic everyone, let my traumatized comfort characters have cats, the bau is autistic (criminal minds), that should be a tagit's only implied but i need you to understand that it's there, fluff

summary: the cat teeters and totters, but eventually makes it across emily's table to what seems to be his destination; a pile of files on spencer's desk. spencer holds his hand out and he takes a step forward, curling into him and causing him to smile a little. / in which, there's a baby cat and lots of needed therapy (or, the bau gets an unofficial therapy cat)

it had been a bad case.

three kidnappings in the same town, all connected - smart, young blondes, all in their freshmen year of highschool, taken by the same pedofilic creep.

it'd been bad from the beginning, and they all had a feeling it'd end that way.

local pd had been riding them from the moment they got there, and the only person who seemed to really trust them was the sheriff - who'd only called because his boss was tired of the bad publicity, and who'd been the unsub all along.

it was always worse when it was the good guys who turned out to be the ones commiting the crimes, because if you couldn't trust them, who was left?

they hadn't saved any of the girls - jaylee had turned up dead within the first 48 hours, her throat slit and body bruised, with lila following two days later. that was the pattern; frank otis had kidnapped them all at the same time at around seven at night, and he'd killed one off every two days.

they'd gotten the unsub, his location, and had all the hope they could muster that they'd be able to save may, but when they showed up, frank had a knife to her throat and a sick smile on his face.

he didn't waste anytime; may was dead before anyone could pull the trigger.

she didn't have any next of kin or family, no boyfriend or girlfriend, or anyone, really - the only reason she'd been reported missing in the first place was because her boss said she hadn't come in that morning, and she fit the victimology.

the only thing she had was her cat, basil.

emily didn't know what else to do with him, and she sure as hell wasn't leaving him alone, not with sergio at home. what kind of mother would she be if she just left him? and it wasn't like it took very much convincing to let him on the plane.

the ride back was silent, with morgan listening to his music, and jj and spencer dozing, and rossi and hotch talking quietly. emily mostly watched basil, who stayed in a kennel, meowing rather sadly every time turbulence disrupted his sleep.

when they'd gotten back, none of them had gone home immediately. there was typically two ways cases ended - with the scum and dirt and exhaustion from another life taken still clinging to them, the feeling of failure keeping them from leaving the offices and taking bad with them back home, to the only places they could leave the terrible behind, or with a feeling of victory that, after maybe a little bit of celebrating, brought their spirits high enough for them to he confident to walk through doorways without taking anything too awful with. today was the former, unspokenly.

emily sets the kettle down at her desk and opens it, watches as basil crawls across, clumsily but cautiously. he's a baby - smaller than the size of emily's palm, grey and white, with wide green eyes. where the name basil came from, emily doesn't know, but it fits in an odd sort of way.

basil is spindly and itty bitty and emily thinks he is too pure for this world.

the rest of the team is hanging around, lingering in the bullpen.

she's also glad such a pure thing is in this world.

basil teeters and totters, but eventually makes it across her table to what seems to be his destination; a pile of files on spencer's desk. he sits down, looks up at him like a dog, and tilts his head, which causes emily to snort.

"the reid effect," hotch says, not as quietly as he pretends, and she hears morgan laugh from behind her.

spencer holds his hand out and basil takes a step forward, curling into him and causing him to smile a little.

there are four bracelets with beads that twist and are made of rubber and strings and different textures around reid's wrist - he stole them from garcia who owns about eight hundred, since he fiddles with everything and they don't feel awful.

basil darts past his hand and starts chewing on them, rolling onto his back with paws in the air and the strings in his mouth, like it's a toy.

"ah, see, i knew he didn't really like you." emily says, and he glares at her when she stifles a laugh.

spencer skirts his hand across the surface and the cat chases it, catching it with a pounce and climbing up his arm. he balances precariously on spencer's ceaselessly fidgety limbs and topples up and over his shoulder.

there's a snap and emily glances up at garcia who winks, camera in her hand.

emily feels impossibly soft here, watching this baby cat curl up and fall asleep on spencer's shoulders while morgan teases him for getting the men, now let me show you how to get the ladies.

watching them. her family - and, god, despite the years, she's still figuring that out. it's still weird to her to look at these people and know they love her as much as she loves them. that she can trust them. and does she ever.

this cat has, impossibly, brought a peace to the space in these walls. a space where they'd seen horror and crime and where they'd suffered at the hands of those they put away.

they needed something good.

like basil.

spencer is still smiling softly, and jj is laughing along with morgan at some stupid joke, and garcia is sneaking photos, and hotch and rossi are being the responsible parents they're not and watching over it all.

emily has an idea, looking at these people, and this dumb, dumb, lovable cat, and she knows she will not give it up until it happens.

"hotch," she says, and everyone glances up at her. she motions to his office and he raises an eyebrow, but follows her nonetheless. she can feel everyone's eyes on them as she shuts the door.

"we need to keep this cat."

"i'm sorry?" he asks, deliberately, and she looks out the window wall to their team.

"look. look how good he is. we need something good, hotch, we need to keep this cat."

he follows her gaze and she watches as his eye soften, just the slightest bit. watching; she's been doing that a lot lately.

"emily...," he trails off, and his lips press together, eyes crinkling at the edges, and not in the smiley way.

"you're doing that thing, hotch." she sighs, and he turns back to her.

"what thing?"

"the thing where you want to say yes, but there's all kinds of if's and but's and so's coming."

now it's his turn to sigh, "even if we could keep him, where we would he put him when we weren't here? and who'll watch over him? make sure he's fed? emily -,"

"i will!" she says, her plan expanding in her head as she speaks. this has to work. she has to let them have this cat - just one win, please, she thinks. "or penelope will, or - look, spence loves him. we could even take turns. you wouldn't even have to worry about him. he wouldn't even have to go out in the field, hotch, he could just stay here."

"alone?" he prompts, but emily knows, she knows he has him.

"anderson's always here." she shrugs, then grins. "or, we could get another cat."

hotch let's out a startled laugh and she let's her grin grow with him. "let's take care of this one, first, and maybe i'll consider it."

she gasps, excitement buzzing in her chest, and - wow, she hasn't felt like this since christmas when she was eleven -, "is that a yes?"

he eyes her, trying, and failing, to look serious and threatening, before nodding. "i suppose." he says, faux reluctantly.

maybe she would've believed his reluctance if she hadn't seen him smiling when she left the room.

#criminal minds: writing #criminal minds #spencer reid #derek morgan #emily prentiss #aaron hotchner #david rossi #jennifer jareau #aaron hotch hotchner #penelope garcia #jennifer jereau #jj jareau #jj criminal minds #hotch #aaron hotch #criminal minds oneshot #criminal minds fanfiction

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