#Randyll tarly that shit

[writergirl2011]

Regarding Hyle Hunt

There's been a little discourse regarding the role one Ser Hyle Hunt will play in Lady Brienne of Tarth's storyline going forward. Some people seem to think that he is her perfect match because they hate the idea that Brienne deserves to have a romance with the man she wants--aka one Ser Jaime Lannister--because that messes with the narrative they want to push, whatever that narrative may be.

Some people think that Ser Hyle Hunt is a more interesting and more remarkable man than he truly is, when nothing he's said or done to this point has shown him to be anything of the sort. Personally, I'm not impressed with a man who set up a bet with his buddies over a young noblewoman's virginity--which was essentially the kiss of death to said young woman, who didn't have much going for her on the marriage mart in the first place. (Don't give me the "men will be men" explanation. That makes you no better than Randyll Tarly.) And his proposal of marriage boils down to: "Hey, baby, you've got an island and a lot of money, I've got a functional dick that's already proven to be fertile. I can close my eyes and blow out the candle. Let's do it." How romantic.

There has been absolutely no indication that Brienne will ever love this man, or even care the slightest for him. Threatening to turn someone into a eunuch isn't playful banter, especially not when said man once bet on her virginity and the last time she confronted someone(s) in that bet, she beat the living shit out of them. She hasn't forgotten, and she really hasn't forgiven. And when it comes to Hyle, she never really will, because in her eyes, what he did was the worst of all of them. He came the closest to winning by doing the one thing none of the others did--he made her feel included, like she might be earning a little bit of respect in that camp. Then she found out it was all a lie.

"But she hated Jaime at first!" Yeah, but that was before Jaime: told a lie about Tarth's wealth to save her from rape; shouted "sapphires" and risked a beating to save her from rape again; risked his own life to save hers by jumping unarmed into a bear pit (with only one hand to boot), and revealed the truth about why he killed Aerys, thus revealing that rather than it being a callous act, he'd saved an entire city of innocents--a noble act. THEN he put his trust in her to find Sansa, gifting her with a horse, armor, and a priceless sword. He gave her the respect Hyle only pretended to give her, expecting nothing in return.

What has Hyle done on their road trip? When Brienne kills the three former Bloody Mummers, I'm curious: how long was Hyle there? At least long enough to see her and Pod burying Nimble Dick, but the way he's described sitting there casually makes me think he'd been there longer. Watching. Sitting back doing nothing while she might've been killed. And we don't know what his true motives are in following her. If she finds Sansa, is he going to help her get Sansa to safety--or is he going to betray her and try to turn Sansa in to the Crown for the reward?

If you want any further proof that she doesn't care about Hyle, think about who she tried to bargain for when Lady Stoneheart was about to hang them all. Not herself, and certainly not Hyle. Podrick, the boy. And when they were hanging, as she was dying. the only person she had eyes for was Pod.

And who did she presumably agree to kill Jaime for? Podrick.

Yeah. She's really going to come around on Hyle.

#Brienne of Tarth #Hyle Hunt #Jaime Lannister #ASOIAF meta #give me a break people #reading comprehension #it's a thing

[thebeesareback]

The big Robert Baratheon thoughts

There are several characters within the ASOIAF universe who could comfortably be the protagonist of their own book/series, and GRRM has spoken about how, when writing a character, he tries to see all the major events through their eyes and how it would have affected their lives. Dany and Oberyn are good examples of this, and a shorter book/series could comfortably have either one of them as the main character. If a fic writer is looking for any inspiration, I think a lot could be drawn from Dany in Vaes Toloro.

Another of them is a character who almost seems like a false protagonist in GOT: King Robert Baratheon. The people who don't know him think he's amazing, the people who do know him despise him. He has a fleshed-out backstory, character and the power to influence the plot in many different ways. Yet he's killed off quickly, and I think the fan community often overlooks him as a simple drunken idiot. So I'd like to dig a little deeper.

Robert's life can easily be sectioned into three parts: pre-rebellion era, the rebellion era and the post-rebellion era. Most of what we see comes from Ned Stark, and later we have flashbacks from Cersei which show a much darker and thoroughly rotten man.

To start: Robert is the first born son of House Baratheon, a clan with significant power and influence. He's exactly the kind of young man the Westerosi patriarchal "might makes right" system rewards -- the sort of son Randyl Tarly would love to have. He's an excellent fighter, charming, good looking ("muscled like a maiden's fantasy", oh Ned). There's also a kindness there. When he's fostered at the Eeire he sends for a gift of oranges for Jon Arryn, and although the fruit goes bad, he's not upset and instead plays with the other teenagers. It's silly and funny and the most childish we ever see him.

He isn't always lovely, of course. In Stannis' memory, Robert is unpleasant. He mocks Stannis' falcon and, therefore, Stannis himself. However, Stannis is a miserable shit, and this comment comes after they've spent years disliking each other, so there's obvious bias. Robert seemed to be happy to be away from his family, and so some alienation from his brothers does make sense. Robert and Stannis go through the ordeal of watching their parents die, and it's understandable that this would cause issues in their relationship. Perhaps that's why they pushed each other away. Having a walking, whining reminder of that trauma can't have been pleasant, and the desire to pretend that everything is ok and ignore problems gets more persistent as the years go on.

The third thing we hear about from Robert's pre-rebellion era is his relationship with Mya Stone. I'm not totally clear on the timeline, so I don't know if it's 1. parents' death > 2. Mya's birth > 3. the rebellion or if 1 and 2 are the other way around. Either way, Robert seems to adore his daughter. Ned thinks about how frequently they visited her, and how much Robert enjoyed spending time with her. In a kinder story, Robert would have always been close to Mya. Then the rebellion starts.

There are, of course, lots of things which lead to the rebellion. I don't think Tywin was going to put up with the Mad King for much longer, and Rhaegar felt the same way. Then you have the coalition between the Starks, Baratheons, Tullys and Arryns, and at some point Varys and "Young Griff" would have popped up. For Robert, though, things were straightforward: he wanted Lyanna, and Rhaegar took her away. He remarks to Ned that "Seven Kingdoms couldn't fill the whole she left". It's clear that he didn't actually know Lyanna that well, and it could easily be argued that the reason he worshipped her memory was a mix of affection for Ned and a desire to return to a time where he wasn't traumatised.

Obviously, war is traumatic. That's kind of the point of the series. Everyone who fought in Robert's Rebellion is changed in some way and the scars, literal and metaphorical, run deep. Stannis broods over his "rewards". Ned misses his sister, brother and father. Catelyn is aware of the loss of her betrothed, and Lady Dustin crystalises her rage. Jamie is ostracised and bitter. Jon Connington promises more violence. The list goes on. The things Robert sees during the campaign clearly change him, and this brings us back to Mya.

One of the key themes of the series, most prominently in the first book, is the idea that the innocent should not be sacrificed. That's why Ned works so hard to protect Jon and why he resigns his handship when Robert wants to kill Dany. Something happened to Robert during the rebellion, where his hatred of the Targaryens solidifies so much that it becomes the only thing he really wants. Other things, like his love of his daughter or the belief that children should be protected, all go and he's left with Tywin Lannister and the corpses of Rhaenys and Aegon.

Robert doesn't have to make peace with the Lannisters. In fact, lots of people (the Starks, the Dornish and the people of King's Landing) would be much happier if he didn't. Tywin ordered a horrific thing, and Robert rewarded him. For me, this is where Robert becomes the man we meet in Game of Thrones. He's so broken inside that he does nothing, and tries to pretend that he's still the person he was as a teenager.

After the rebellion, Robert goes on to have plenty more children. If he loved Mya and wanted to see her all the time, after the rebellion he forgets her. And she's the lucky one! Robert must know that Cersei has his twins drowned, he ignores Barra and Gendry, and he only acknowledges Edric Storm because he has to. Then there are the kids who are legally "his", even if biologically they're not. I don't think we ever see him interact with Tommen or Myrecella, and his relationship with Joffrey isn't good. Sure, Joffrey is a little shit, but you could argue that it's partially because of Robert's treatment. Stannis thinks, at one point, that Robert might have killed Joffrey because he hit him so hard.

Why does Robert detach? Well, there's the trauma, the general depression, the loneliness, the disconnect between *conceiving* children and *the actual children*. I think, as well, there's the knowledge that, by allowing Tywin to get away with the murder of the Targaryen children, he's set a precedent whereby the same thing could easily happen to his own kids. If someone needed to get rid of Robert -- and there are people who would like him gone -- they would come after Joffrey, Tommen and Myrecella, and perhaps his bastards, too. He can't protect them, and it shames his chivalric ideals, so he disconnects, doesn't care, and drinks excessively. It might be a way of dealing with guilt, or a way he protects himself from losing anyone else. Ultimately, Joffrey, Tommen and Myrecella are doomed; Edric only escaped sacrifice because of Pylos and Davos, and might well get mixed up in a Varys/"Young Griff" scheme; all of the bastards in King's Landing are killed; and if Gendry survives, it's because of plot armour. Nobody cares about Mya, really.

There's plenty to say about the Robert/Cersei match. Firstly, I'd like to mention how much I enjoy the show-only scene where the two discuss their marriage. It's heartbreaking, well written and beautifully acted, and gives some depth which makes the experience richer.

None of the Lannisters like Robert, with the exception of Tyrion. Tyrion likes Robert because Cersei doesn't, but their creepy and destructive bond is a whole other issue. Ned thinks that Robert was a man with "big appetites", and a clear desire to be loved. It probably means he wasn't ever going to be a good husband, which Lyanna points out (in a line which I cannot imagine a 14-year old ever saying, but I digress). Robert loved the thrill of the chase and the first few weeks of a relationship, but wasn't willing to really emotionally attach to anyone. Perhaps it's because, like with his children, he had to keep people away in case he lost them, like Lyanna.

Cersei is her own woman and, to be honest, not a very good wife. Robert thinks he would have been happy with Lyanna, Cersei thinks she would have been happy with Rhaegar: both are wrong. She starts her wedding day by having sex with her brother; she regularly cuckolds her husband, and then she finishes off by murdering her husband. You could argue that her behaviour is driven by Robert's physical and sexual abuse, and his emotional distance and obvious disdain. I don't think that's incorrect, per se, I just think there's a nasty mix with the two of them. They're bad alone and worse together. They're a toxic, unhappy, traumatised mix, and a solid argument for Westerosi divorce.

Finally, there's Robert's alcoholism and his love of food. There are a number of reasons for this -- the genre's enthusiasm for descriptions of feasts; parallels with Henry VIII of England; possibly GRRM simply likes adding his favourite meals, similar to how he created House Estermont so there could be turtles, because he had pet turtles. Obesity is the sort of thing that's pretty common in middle age men who used to be very physically active, because they had to eat lots to make up their calorie deficit, and when the exercise stopped, the food continued. As for alcohol, it gives Robert an opportunity to forget his (admittedly plentiful) responsibilities and woes, makes him feel like a hero, and gives him an excuse for his abuse of Cersei. He rapes her, and when she brings it up, he says "it was not me, but the wine", then REACHES FOR A BEER. I'm certainly not qualified to talk about addiction and trauma, so if anyone has thoughts on this, please add a comment.

In Shakespeare's Macbeth, the eponymous character snatches the crown at his wife's goading, and then finds that things disintegrate around him. There's a scene in the play where two servants talk about what's going on in Scotland, and one says that two horses fought, and one ate the other. When a monarch is usurped, in literature, nature goes against itself. In real life, revolutions are messy and complicated and difficult. Robert Baratheon fought a rebellion to get his fiance back, whilst others used him and worked alongside him for their own reasons. He was left holding a rotten crown. Abused and abuser, surrounded by toxicity and exuding his own hatred, one could easily create a novel about his disillusionment.

#long post #robert baratheon #ned stark #cersei lannister #jon arryn #mya stone #gendry baratheon #jamie lannister #tyrion lannister #tywin lannister #joffrey baratheon #tommen baratheon #chivalry #asoif/got #a song of ice and fire #game of thrones #a storm of swords #a clash of kings #a feast for crows #a dance with dragons #grrm #george r r martin #king robert baratheon #roberts rebellion

[daenerys-targaryen]

With all ur posts on reading asoiaf just reminds me of how ridiculous the show was. Like that whole ass controversial Randyll Tarly scene in the show when in the books he’s like the number 1 hardcore Targaryen loyalist and if Young Griff wasn’t there, he would NEVER stand against Dany. Even in the books, I think he might switch to Daenerys eventually.

Sometimes I sit back and am really like… god they really just destroyed it all for shits and giggles

#leah has mail #anonymous #anti got #Lol

[rosaluxembae]

Renly's my favourite king. He's just so refreshingly honest, who gives a fuck about claims, they're all usurpers anyway. And he's right, he would be the best king. Characters dunk on him for thinking that dressing pretty and being charismatic and making political alliances makes him a good but but that's what being a king *is*. Stannis would bleed the realm and his religious intolerance would be a barrier to peace and stability. Joffrey is cruel and stupid and cause constant disorder.

He's untested in battle but so was Robb and of all his problems, winning battles wasn't one. If he's not a great commander he can just let Randyll Tarly make his decisions, a good king knows how to delegate effectively. Besides, just look at Robert to see what happens when you stick a meathead warrior with no interest in ruling on the throne.

Is it worth starting a war over? Maybe not but what you gonna do? He *technically* declared before Stannis but everyone knew Stannis was going to. There's already a success crisis so why pick one of those monsters to rule when you can do a better job yourself?

Renly did one (1) thing wrong and that's not accepting Robb's alliance. Let him have the North and Riverlands, it's all snow and wolf shit anyway, who's arsed? And as a wise man once said, 5 outta 7 ain't bad (or is that 7 outta 9 ain't bad?) It doesn't matter in the end anyway but Stannis used magic like a cheaty cheater.

Also we stan a gay king king and the Rainbow Guard is extremely aesthetic.

Aegon would be good too I guess.

#renly baratheon #Renly #asoiaf #agot #acok #rainbow guard #best king

[istumpysk]

Operation Stumpy Re-Read

AFFC: Jaime II (Chapter 16)

The funeral procession departed King's Landing through the Gate of the Gods, wider and more splendid than the Lion Gate. The choice felt wrong to Jaime. His father had been a lion, that no one could deny, but even Lord Tywin never claimed to be a god.

How is Daenerys losing against Tywin? Tywin.

+.+.+

Ser Kevan snorted. "So do we all. How fares your king?" His tone made the question a reproach.

"Well enough," Jaime said defensively. "Balon Swann is with him during the mornings. A good and valiant knight."

"Once that went without saying when men spoke of those who wore the white cloak."

No man can choose his brothers, Jaime thought. Give me leave to pick my own men, and the Kingsguard will be great again. Put that baldly, though, it sounded feeble; an empty boast from a man the realm called Kingslayer. A man with shit for honor. Jaime let it go. He had not come to argue with his uncle. 

I'd love to see who he'd put on the Kingsguard. Guaranteed he'd remain as one of the seven.

Is it too much to ask for Jaime to move off of Aerys, and start reflecting on other things that make him a terrible person?

+.+.+

"Will you remain at Darry after the wedding?"

"For a while, mayhaps. Sandor Clegane is raiding along the Trident, it would seem. Your sister wants his head. It may be that he has joined Dondarrion."

Jaime had heard about Saltpans. By now half the realm had heard. The raid had been exceptionally savage. Women raped and mutilated, children butchered in their mothers' arms, half the town put to the torch. "Randyll Tarly is at Maidenpool. Let him deal with the outlaws. I would sooner have you go to Riverrun."

Notice how no one in the story is having a difficult time believing it's Sandor Clegane doing this?

Hell, I'd love to know how many readers never questioned it.

+.+.+

"Addam Marbrand could deal with these outlaws just as well as you. So could Brax, Banefort, Plumm, any of these others. But none would make a good King's Hand."

"Your sister knows my terms. They have not changed. Tell her that, the next time you are in her bedchamber."

+.+.+

He had hoped against hope that Cersei had somehow misunderstood, but plainly that was wrong. He knows about the two of us. About Tommen and Myrcella. And Cersei knows he knows. Ser Kevan was a Lannister of Casterly Rock. He could not believe that she would ever do him harm, but . . . I was wrong about Tyrion, why not about Cersei? When sons were killing fathers, what was there to stop a niece from ordering an uncle slain? An inconvenient uncle, who knows too much. 

Is Jaime going to think Cersei killed Kevan?

Is this about anyone else? I can think of plenty of uncles and aunts who would slay their nephews and/or nieces, but I'm drawing a blank going the other way.

+.+.+

"That's just the thing a bride wants on her wedding night," said Jaime. "A husband who knows how to do his duty."

A flush crept up Lancel's cheeks. "I pray for you, cousin. And for Her Grace the queen. May the Crone lead her to her wisdom and the Warrior defend her."

"Why would Cersei need the Warrior? She has me." Jaime turned his horse about, his white cloak snapping in the wind. 

Ohhh! We love to see it! Sister and brother as the Maiden and the Warrior!

I thought that I was the Warrior and Cersei was the Maid, but all the time she was the Stranger, hiding her true face from my gaze. - Jaime IV, AFFC

x

❤️ The Maiden lay athwart the Warrior, her arms widespread as if to embrace him. - Davos I, ACOK ❤️

+.+.+

The Imp was lying. Cersei would sooner have Robert's corpse between her legs than a pious fool like Lancel. Tyrion, you evil bastard, you should have lied about someone more likely.

Tee-hee.

+.+.+

Garlan the Gallant had taken half the Tyrell strength back to Highgarden, and his lady mother and grandmother had gone with him. The other half had marched south with Mace Tyrell and Mathis Rowan to invest Storm's End.

As for the Lannister host, two thousand seasoned veterans remained encamped outside the city walls, awaiting the arrival of Paxter Redwyne's fleet to carry them across Blackwater Bay to Dragonstone. 

Ignore me.

Half the Tyrell strength with Garlan at Highgarden.

Half the Tyrell strength with Mathis Rowan at Storm's End.

Two thousand Lannister men at Dragonstone with Paxter Redwyne.

Got it.

+.+.+

Then the Knight of Flowers mounted up and put the others all to shame.

Jousting was three-quarters horsemanship, Jaime had always believed. Ser Loras rode superbly, and handled a lance as if he'd been born holding one

I was trying to understand why I was reading about jousting for an entire page, until I came to this and remembered.

Knight of the Laughing Tree clues.

+.+.+

"Oh, look," purred Lady Merryweather, "your brave brother has returned, Your Grace."

"Most of him." 

lmfao. brutal.

+.+.+

The queen was in her cups, Jaime realized. Of late, Cersei always seemed to have a flagon of wine to hand, she who had once scorned Robert Baratheon for his drinking.

Perfect, a blasted Cersei talking with Lady Merryweather. That's exactly what we want.

+.+.+

Pycelle looked desperately uncomfortable. "There has been a bird," he said. "From Stokeworth. Lady Tanda sends word that her daughter Lollys has been delivered of a strong, healthy son."

"And you will never guess what they have named the little bastard, brother."

"They wanted to name him Tywin, I recall."

"Yes, but I forbade it. I told Falyse that I would not have our father's noble name bestowed upon the ill-gotten spawn of some pig boy and a feeble-witted sow."

"Lady Stokeworth insists the child's name was not her doing," Grand Maester Pycelle put in. Perspiration dotted his wrinkled forehead. "Lollys's husband made the choice, she writes. This man Bronn, he . . . it would seem that he . . ."

"Tyrion," ventured Jaime. "He named the child Tyrion."

If I wasn't aware of all the things Tyrion has said and thought about Lollys Stokeworth, I might be able to find this amusing.

By the way, Tommen is sitting right there and hearing all this feeble-witted sow talk.

+.+.+

Jaime knew the look in his sister's eyes. He had seen it before, most recently on the night of Tommen's wedding, when she burned the Tower of the Hand. The green light of the wildfire had bathed the face of the watchers, so they looked like nothing so much as rotting corpses, a pack of gleeful ghouls, but some of the corpses were prettier than others. Even in the baleful glow, Cersei had been beautiful to look upon. She'd stood with one hand on her breast, her lips parted, her green eyes shining. She is crying, Jaime had realized, but whether it was from grief or ecstasy he could not have said.

The sight had filled him with disquiet, reminding him of Aerys Targaryen and the way a burning would arouse him. 

I'm positive it's supposed to remind us of someone else.

But please, continue with these Cersei-Aerys parallels.

+.+.+

A king has no secrets from his Kingsguard. Relations between Aerys and his queen had been strained during the last years of his reign. They slept apart and did their best to avoid each other during the waking hours. But whenever Aerys gave a man to the flames, Queen Rhaella would have a visitor in the night. The day he burned his mace-and-dagger Hand, Jaime and Jon Darry had stood at guard outside her bedchamber whilst the king took his pleasure. "You're hurting me," they had heard Rhaella cry through the oaken door. "You're hurting me." In some queer way, that had been worse than Lord Chelsted's screaming. "We are sworn to protect her as well," Jaime had finally been driven to say. "We are," Darry allowed, "but not from him."

Jaime had only seen Rhaella once after that, the morning of the day she left for Dragonstone. The queen had been cloaked and hooded as she climbed inside the royal wheelhouse that would take her down Aegon's High Hill to the waiting ship, but he heard her maids whispering after she was gone. They said the queen looked as if some beast had savaged her, clawing at her thighs and chewing on her breasts. A crowned beast, Jaime knew.

I'M SO SLOW.

This is when Daenerys was conceived! I didn't know that!

It would be totally unfair and in poor taste to suggest any of this influenced her disposition, but I'm going to do it anyway.

BAD OMEN BABY.

+.+.+

By the end the Mad King had become so fearful that he would allow no blade in his presence, save for the swords his Kingsguard wore. 

Why, were Usurper's Knives chasing him?

+.+.+

His beard was matted and unwashed, his hair a silver-gold tangle that reached his waist, his fingernails cracked yellow claws nine inches long. Yet still the blades tormented him, the ones he could never escape, the blades of the Iron Throne. His arms and legs were always covered with scabs and half-healed cuts.

Let him be king over charred bones and cooked meat, Jaime remembered, studying his sister's smile. Let him be the king of ashes. 

Tee-hee.

+.+.+

"I am growing very fond of Lady Taena. She amuses me."

"She is one of Margaery Tyrell's companions," Jaime reminded her. "She's informing on you to the little queen."

"Of course she is." Cersei went to the sideboard to fill her cup anew. "Margaery was thrilled when I asked her leave to take Taena on as my companion. You should have heard her. 'She will be a sister to you, as she's been to me. Of course you must have her! I have my cousins and my other ladies.' Our little queen does not want me to be lonely."

"If you know she is a spy, why take her on?"

"Margaery is not half so clever as she thinks. She has no notion what a sweet serpent she has in that Myrish slut. I use Taena to feed the little queen what I want her to know. Some of it is even true." Cersei's eyes were bright with mischief. "And Taena tells me everything Maid Margaery is doing."

At what point did Cersei forget all of this?

+.+.+

She knows I can do more for her than Margaery, so she makes herself useful to me. You would be surprised at all the interesting things she's told me."

"What sorts of things?"

Cersei sat beneath the window. "Did you know that the Queen of Thorns keeps a chest of coins in her wheelhouse? Old gold from before the Conquest. Should any tradesman be so unwise as to name a price in golden coins, she pays him with hands from Highgarden, each half the weight of one of our dragons. What merchant would dare complain of being cheated by Mace Tyrell's lady mother?"

That's the information she gave Cersei? Weird, that almost makes her seem like a Varys agent.

I know, I know, I'll save the tinfoil for Bran.

+.+.+

"Roose Bolton is our Warden of the North. He will deal with Stannis."

"Lord Bolton is trapped below the Neck, cut off from the north by the ironmen at Moat Cailin."

"Not for long. Bolton's bastard son will soon remove that little obstacle. Lord Bolton will have two thousand Freys to augment his own strength, under Lord Walder's sons Hosteen and Aenys. That should be more than enough to deal with Stannis and a few thousand broken men."

Ignore me.

Two thousand Frey men in the north.

A few thousand Stannis men in the north.

Got it.

+.+.+

"You still require a Hand, however. If not our uncle, who?"

His sister laughed. "Not you. Have no fear on that count. Perhaps Taena's husband. His grandfather was Hand under Aerys."

Lady Merryweather has already managed to secure one of the most powerful positions in all of Westeros for her husband. Who is playing who here?

+.+.+

"I govern the realm."

Seven save us all, you do. His sister liked to think of herself as Aegon Lord Tywin with teats, but she was wrong. Their father had been as relentless and implacable as a glacier, where Cersei was all wildfire, especially when thwarted. 

Tywin is ice, and Cersei is fire?

But. . . jonerys??

+.+.+

"A weak ruler needs a strong Hand, as Aerys needed Father. A strong ruler requires only a diligent servant to carry out his orders." She swirled her wine. "Lord Hallyne might suit. He would not be the first pyromancer to serve as the King's Hand."

Can everyone please go to the wiki, and look at the image used for Lord Hallyne? Thank you.

What's dumber, making a pyromancer your Hand or giving the job to Tyrion Lannister? Tough, right?

+.+.+

No. I killed the last one. "There is talk that you mean to make Aurane Waters the master of ships."

"Has someone been informing on me?" When he did not answer, Cersei tossed her hair back, and said, "Waters is well suited to the office. He has spent half his life on ships."

"Half his life? He cannot be more than twenty."

Sure, but consider this: he's hot.

+.+.+

"A weak ruler needs a strong Hand, as Aerys needed Father. A strong ruler requires only a diligent servant to carry out his orders." 

x

"Half his life? He cannot be more than twenty."

"Two-and-twenty, and what of it? Father was not even one-and-twenty when Aerys Targaryen named him Hand. 

I love when they put daddy on a pedestal.

+.+.+

"You are a child, Jaime. Redwyne is Tyrell's bannerman, and nephew to that hideous grandmother of his. I want none of Lord Tyrell's creatures on my council."

"Tommen's council, you mean."

"You know what I mean."

Too well. "I know that Aurane Waters is a bad idea, and Hallyne is a worse one. As for Qyburn . . . gods be good, Cersei, he rode with Vargo Hoat. The Citadel stripped him of his chain!"

"The grey sheep. Qyburn has made himself most useful to me. And he is loyal, which is more than I can say of mine own kin."

The crows will feast upon us all if you go on this way, sweet sister. "Cersei, listen to yourself. You are seeing dwarfs in every shadow and making foes of friends. Uncle Kevan is not your enemy. I am not your enemy."

I think it's a bit concerning Qyburn is being grouped with other bad decisions like Aurance Waters, and Hallyne.

+.+.+

"Get out, I said. I am sick of looking at that ugly stump of yours. Get out!" To speed him on his way, she heaved her wine cup at his head. She missed, but Jaime took the hint.

Evenfall found him sitting alone in the common room of White Sword Tower, with a cup of Dornish red and the White Book. 

Thrown out by Cersei, and straight to Evenfall. This is big foreshadowing in Braime Land.

Every single day I feel spoiled.

+.+.+

"I saw you in the yard today," said Jaime. "You rode well."

"Better than well, surely." Ser Loras poured himself a cup of wine, and took a seat across the half-moon table.

"A more modest man might have answered 'My lord is too kind,' or 'I had a good mount.'"

Both Cersei and Jaime having to deal with younger (less evil) versions of themselves is a riot.

+.+.+

"This one is for us. The history of every man who has ever worn a white cloak is written here."

"I have glanced at it. The shields are pretty. I prefer books with more illuminations. Lord Renly owned a few with drawings that would turn a septon blind."

PORN.

+.+.+

"Good enough. He died, but his king lived. A lot of brave men have worn the white cloak. Most have been forgotten."

"Most deserve to be forgotten. The heroes will always be remembered. The best."

"The best and the worst." So one of us is like to live in song. "And a few who were a bit of both. Like him."

A bit of both, eh? You're running out of time, and I see little opportunity left.

+.+.+

"The best and the worst." So one of us is like to live in song. "And a few who were a bit of both. Like him." He tapped the page he had been reading.

"Who?" Ser Loras craned his head around to see. "Ten black pellets on a scarlet field. I do not know those arms."

"They belonged to Criston Cole, who served the first Viserys and the second Aegon." Jaime closed the White Book. "They called him Kingmaker."

Does pushing a child out of a tower count as kingmaking? Heh, kingslaying and kingmaking, he did a bit of both!

Anyway, Criston Cole is the Kingsguard who was rumoured to be Rhaenyra Targaryen's lover. Let's ignore the rest of the history, and pretend it was unavailable at this point.

We first learn about Criston Cole in a chapter where Arianne Martell is being intimate with a member of the Kingsguards. Now he's being brought up again to close out a Jaime chapter, and the word 'CERSEI' follows in big, bold letters.

Based on that alone, it feels like this has less to do with kingmaking, and more to do with sexual relations between Kingsguard and would-be queens. But what the hell do I know?

Final thoughts:

The more we get into the history, the more I'm in serious trouble.

Only gifs from here on out.

-> return to menu <-

#operation stumpy re-read #affc #jaime ii

[inky-duchess]

Can the monarch himself disinherit the crown prince? Like, he thinks he is incompetent and his younger sibling would make a better king/queen. Or would that make no difference because of succession laws?

Unfortunately, he cannot unless there is some loophole that says he can. He could pressure the Crown Prince to give up his rights, leaning on him to give it up but he cannot bypass the Crown Prince (unless the succession laws state he can). If your King is worried about the kingdom and smart, he will do anything needed to ensure the right child succeeds the throne.

#I'm not condoning murder but.... #Randyll tarly that shit #Ask answered #Nonny

[mummer]

ppl hating sam again on the subreddit lord help me prevent me from engaging

#i just cant believe it bro.............. i just cant believe it #saying without a hint of irony that he was 'incompetent' and deserved 15 YEARS OF PHYSICAL AND EMOTIONAL ABUSE #lol im shaking like a chihuahua. what is going on. #wow missing the entire point of his character much i am Going to scream. #dont do a tirade on reddit dont do a tirade on reddit dont do a tirade on r #you're going to fucking defend randyll tarly? RANDYLL TARLY??????????? HOLY SHIT #i am. wow. i have never been this mad before #like at ANYTHING on the sub. and that is saying somehting

[sapphiresandsunlight]

Randyll Tarly: You can’t just swan around Westeros in armor, pretending to be a knight

Brienne of Tarth: Not to worry, I have a permit. Podrick, in my bag you’ll find a parchment. Bring it to his lordship.

Randyll Tarly, reading: This just says “I can do what I want”

#okay but this is canon tho #forrealz #p&r #parks and rec #parks & rec #incorrect quotes #lol #eat shit randyll tarly #brienne's royal hall pass #thanks to the discord for reminding me that it existed #tommen u the real mvp

[revansnow]

Tarly execution recap

Dany: hey i know you guys just committed treason and helped murder an old woman, that you were sworn to protect, in cold blood but maybe we can still be allies?

trump suporter, known birther, and child abuser Randyll Tarly: lmao fuck off foreigner let me see your birth certificate

Tyrion: maybe we can send them to the wall?

Randyll: nope you can’t tell me what to do she’s not my queen she wasn’t born here gtfo

Dany: well since you’ll just attack me if i let you go i guess i have to kill you

Dickon: i too would like to die

Dany: well okay

a certain section of the fandom that ignores that their fav wanted to make two children homeless in the middle of winter: oh my god she’s evil!!! mad queen!!!! war crimes!!!

#daenerys targaryen #randyll tarly is a piece of shit #why are people so delusional

[nobodysuspectsthebutterfly]

So all Randyll Tarly had to do, was choose Dickon as his heir over Sam? That guy was always a piece of work... but this is just... messed up.

Kings can get away with passing over relatives more easily than others. (Per Elio Garcia, discussing the situation of Aerys passing over Rhaegar’s children in favor of Viserys.) Lords might find it a bit more difficult to choose another heir than the standard, especially if not dealing with a female heir or infants, but an adult son of sound mind and body.

So, basically, Randyll didn’t want Dickon’s inheritance to have a chance of being disputed. Even if Sam formally abdicated from the lordship of Horn Hill, publicly renouncing his claim (as Prince Duncan did for the Iron Throne), technically he’d still have more of a right to the seat and to Heartsbane than his younger brother Dickon. Lord’s choice can be argued against (especially after the lord is dead and any written will is “accidentally” lost), and though Sam himself would never make any noise about it, maybe one of Randyll’s enemies would; or in the future, it could be that Sam’s children would cause problems for Dickon’s children. So Randyll made it much more than just a simple abdication or lord’s choice, but forced Sam to take the black and the vows to never hold land or marry.

Though what makes Randyll a real piece of work (I mean, other than the threat to hunt Sam down and kill him if he didn’t agree to go to the Night’s Watch, and the rest of the abuse too) is the fact that he tortured him into giving up any interest in becoming a maester – even though Sam was basically volunteering to abdicate from the succession of Horn Hill! A maester also vows not to hold land or have children! But you see, a life of servitude is unworthy of a son of House Tarly. 🙄 Not toxically masculine enough, no swords and armor at the Citadel… or not as much chance of getting killed by wildling raiders, I suppose…

#goldengrasp #asoiaf #asoiaf meta #randyll tarly #samwell tarly #dickon tarly #westeros laws and customs #succession #abuse tw #randyll tarly is a piece of shit #you know he has enemies seriously like i bet all his neighbors hate him #his in-laws in house florent and house hightower too

[thewolfbit]

i thought this was an ironic title and would be some kind of Real Talk about race in GoT but it’s literally praising D*ny’s whiteness as something that makes her stand out......guys HELPPP

#like honestly i thought that subreddit had hit rock bottom but...... #ok cool #racist post calmly accepted onto front page #are people.....not aware.....that they are digging themselves in deeper with this shit #honestly though the randyll tarly scene was Genius bc his discourse about foreigners makes Modern Viewers draw parallels w/current politics #and make D*ny seem like the Progressive one #anyway this post/subreddit sucks and that's all i have to say #anti-targaryen restoration

[tanviberwah]

The Mad King: *burns alive rickard stark and strangles brandon stark*

Daenerys Targaryen: I’m not my father

Daenerys Targaryen:

#game of thrones #gotedit #daenerys targaryen #randyll tarly #dickon tarly #look i know what the circumstances are now #but hooo if this wasn't supposed to be a parallel #i'm so done with siding a single person in this dumbass story #all gonna prove me wrong #some shit like the night king is gonna turn out to be the rightful heir of the iron throne #mine #myfs #a song of ice and fire

[travllingbunny]

God, I hate Tywin Lannister apologism so, so much. I was just reading a thread on Quora, and I was just reminded how much I detest it.

But rest assured that no one will ridicule and dismiss Tywin’s apologists the way that fans of some other villainous or semi-villainous characters are (even if those characters aren’t nearly as evil in comparison), compare them to real world followers of evil dictators, or write about them as examples of misaimed fandom similar to what the “Draco In Leather Pants” trope is supposed to be about. 

That’s because, as I’ve previously realized, the Draco in Leather Pants trope is mostly about ridiculing Stupid Women for their weakness for hot men and heartbreaking backstories, har har har (they have the soft heart of women!), while Tywin’s or Randall Tarly’s apologists, from what I’ve seen, tend to be dudes, and none of them find Tywin hot or think he could have been redeemed. Instead, they see him more as a father/patriarch and idolize him as a great leader, claiming that everything he did was justified. And apparently, that’s OK. 

(Well, that makes sense. You know how fangirls who are seen as “leather pantsing” their favorite male characters are sometimes compared to women marrying Charles Manson or sending love letters to serial killers? If we’re going to act like there is no difference between fiction and reality, well, we all know that it’s a handful of women sending love letters to serial killers that is one of the greatest problems of modern society! As opposed to people supporting evil ruthless dictators and justifying all their actions as “necessary”, which is totes not a big real life problem. What?)

#tywin lannister #asoaif #a song of ice and fire #game of thrones #draco in leather pants #tywin shitting gold #that's a trope that I've named #it should be a trope at the very least #fandom #randyll tarly

[shit-my-parents-say-during-got]

Randyll Tarly doesn't bend the knee to Dany

Dad: Is he the new Tywin? Like, absolutely horrible to one of his kids but still kinda badass and cool?

#Randyll tarly #game of thrones #shit dad says #tywin Lannister #shit my parents say during game of thrones #got spoilers #game of thrones spoilers #season 7

[blackbyrenflowers]

You know, the funny thing about the whole Daenerys killing the Tarlys thing in season 7 is that I can't think of a single other ruler in Westeros who wouldn't have done the same.

Picture this. Let's say Ned Stark wins a battle during Robert's Rebellion, perhaps against the Reach at Storm's End or something. Afterwards when he's going around making sure everyone bends the knee as a representative of Robert, some Lord says "No, I refuse to bend the knee."

A more impatient lord like Robert might just take his head right then and there. He'd be pretty well within his rights to do, and it sends a pretty clear message. But instead Ned decides to be merciful, and decides to send them to the Wall, as he's a northman who respects the Night's Watch.

The Lord says "No, I'm not going to the Wall. Robert isn't my king, you can't make me."

Do you really think Ned would say "ah, nuts" and imprison him in case he changes his mind? No, Ned would bust out Ice and take off his head, because Robert was the king.

Dickon? Ned Stark had his hostage Theon always carrying around his sword during executions, the same sword that would be used to take off his head if Balon rebelled again. Ned might feel bad about it for a time, but he'd kill him if he refused to bend the knee as well.

What about Rickard and Brandon who were burned alive by Daenerys' father?

The important difference here between the Tarlys and Rickard/Brandon Stark, as I've seen some comparisons made, is that Brandon and Rickard were innocent. They were the wronged parties, who had a sister/daughter abducted by Rhaegar and asked their liege for justice. But Aerys didn't give two shits. He had Rickard killed after he asked for a trial by combat for his son (not him, as he was even more innocent than his son), saying that fire was the champion of House Targaryen.

The pyromancers roasted Lord Rickard slowly, banking and fanning that fire carefully to get a nice even heat. His cloak caught first, and then his surcoat, and soon he wore nothing but metal and ashes. Next he would start to cook, Aerys promised . . . unless his son could free him. Brandon tried, but the more he struggled, the tighter the cord constricted around his throat. In the end he strangled himself.

Rickard and Brandon's deaths were both deliberately and carefully planned to be as slow, agonizing, and humiliating as possible. And they commited no crimes.

The Tarlys on the other hand betrayed their liege Olenna Tyrell (who shouldn't have even been in charge of the Reach, same as Ellaria with Dorne, but apparently no one even mentioned that, so... Sigh) who was getting revenge for the death of her son and grandchildren, their actual lieges, and sided with Cersei, their murderer who usurped the throne she had no claim to. They sacked highgarden, leaving no survivors. As Olenna had sworn fealty to her on behalf of the Reach, Daenerys was perfectly within her rights to execute them, even without them passing down the option of the Wall.

Counterpoint: Well that's not fair. If Randyll sticks with Cersei and loses, he dies. If he sticks with Olenna and she loses, he dies. If he does nothing, he probably dies as well somehow.

Well, yeah. Feudalism sucks when compared to democracy.

#game of thrones #house tarly #daenerys targaryen #randyll tarly #dickon tarly #aerys ii targaryen #got