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#Sasha is my favorite girl she’s so fucking weird I love her so so much

toasty-owl-arts · 2 years

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hurtmionedanger · 5 months

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Hey bestie don't be shy

top 5 favorite podcast characters and why

YOU EXPECT ME TO PICK???? PICK BETWEEN MY BELOVED GUYS???????

I am going to try to diversify beyond the magnus archives, mostly because dbd has had me in a death choke recently

With that being said, in no particular order

1. The Obituary writer from Death by Dying

Hes such an icon, normal guy and yet so so so very weird, his best friend is the angel of death, his other best friend is in his freezer and her still beating heart is on his desk, everyone thinks he’s going to kill someone one of these days based on looks alone, he has a questionable taste in fashion, hes bisexual, he has three man eating cats, he solves murders just like as a hobby, he is the most sopping wet pathetic wet cat of a man you could ever hope to meet, he is silly, what more could you possibly want from a man?

2. Jonathan Jarchivist, see prior post about this man he is so ridiculous, mf ACCIDENTALLY STARTED THE APOCALYPSE, He has been kidnapped more then princess peach, he is the eyes special little boy, hes ASEXUAL LIKE ME FRFR, he has a boyfriend who loves him very much, he likes good cows, hot singles in his area want to hunt him for sport, hes the saddest little meow meow there could possibly be.

3. Timothy stoker, managed to convey he was wearing a hawaiian shirt by voice alone, also THIS MAN IS THE ARCHIVES BRAINCELL, THE SLUTTY BISEXUAL IS THE BRAINCELL HERE WHAT DOES THAT SAY ABOUT THE ARCHIVES, BECAUSE SASHA VERY MUCH IS NOT THE BRAINCELL SHE FOLLOWED A DEFINITELY NOT HUMAN GUY TO A RANDOM GRAVEYARD WITH VERY LITTLE FOLLOW UP AS TO WHY SHE NEEDED TO GO, AND JON DOESNT HAVE IT FOR PREVIOUSLY STATED REASONS, AND MARTIN IS MARTIN, MEANING TIM IS THE ONLY BRAINCELL HERE. Also as my boyfriend can attest, i have a thing for angry men in hawaiian shirts, i think theyre hot

4. Not technically a Guy persay, but the beloved michael distortion for having a sick ass voice and an even sicker statement, shows up and just stabs the archivist just because he can, he is literally the embodiment of gaslighting gatekeeping and girlbossing and his design is very cool really regardless of how people draw him but ESPECIALLY WHEN THEY DRAW HIM WITH LIKE SUPER DISTORTED JOINTS AND MULTIPLE FACES AND SHIT LIKE MMMMMMMMM, he gets bonus points for having excellent hair and not being a who but a what

Number five hhhh how do i pick between all of my beloved podcast guys, leaving out martin because i already screamed about Why i love Martin Knife Blackwood Already

5. Georgie Barker I think has to go here, maybe alongside helen and Melanie, i love them all for very different reasons but they are just such girlbosses, georgie just doesn’t feel fear, had an existential crisis so hard her brain stopped processing it, she is the girl ever, also shes jons ex, automatically getting her more points, she had a skin clown break into her apartment and fuck with her lights and the only reason she was upset was because it meant she had to replace all her lightbulbs, Also georgie has a podcast where she talks about ghosts, which is really funny to me, and i would absolutely listen to her podcast

Honorable mentions:

Helen for season 5 shenanigans of showing up whenever JMart were fighting because she wanted the Tea

Gerry Keay for his defining trait mentioned by every single statement giver who saw him being “Really shittily dyed hair” like imagine that being your legacy

#danger zone #asks #the magnus archives #death by dying

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afrival · 3 years

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AOT Characters When Drinking HCs

My friend and I were talking the other day and made some HCs about the AOT characters when they’re drunk— I shall share a them here 😎🤙

cw// alcohol, vomit

modern au shit so this like doesn’t apply season 4 characterization

The 104th Gang

Eren:

- Angry drunk

- To quote my friend, you would say something around him and he's just "ohmmy GODDD shutttt the fuck UP”

- It literally doesn’t matter what you say he will tell you to shut up

- Picks fights for no fucking reason, especially with Jean

- If they’re out to drink he would start a fight with a stranger

- Mikasa literally has to drag him away from fights

- Probably drinks too much and vomits for HOURS and then brags about how high his alcohol tolerance is

- Claims he doesn’t get hangovers but everybody knows he’s lying because he will absolutely just zone out of every conversation the next day

- Always looks like he is on the verge of vomiting again

Mikasa:

- Does not drink because she has to babysit Eren

- However when she does she does not drink a lot

- Probably gets like really flustered and embarrassed, maybe a little touchy b/c her head hurts or something

- Like she’ll lay her head on Sasha’s shoulder meanwhile Eren and Jean are yelling at each other in the background

- Does get a hangover but usually it’s just a headache and she’ll be EXHAUSTED

Armin:

- COMPLETE fucking lightweight oh my god

- Do not give this man alcohol he will absolutely get wrecked

- One glass of wine is probably enough to get him tipsy

- I can’t decide if he would be the kind of person that gets really emotional and cries about everything or if he would go on long drunken rants about the most random shit

- Probably both

- Like he would be crying about the fact that he learned about otters having a favorite rock or this REALLY round corgi he saw last weak and it was just too cute

- Mikasa has to babysit both Eren and Armin whenever he drinks because Eren will absolutely try and drag Armin into his fights

- And with the drunken courage he has Armin would absolutely join in by yelling or hyping Eren up

- He becomes such an enabler

- Would have a hangover if he didn’t pass the fuck out and sleep the entire next day

Connie and Sasha:

- Two for one deal, they are always hanging out whenever they drink

- They’re the most CHAOTIC fucking duo ever, like they would somehow get their hands on a bunch of firecrackers and let loose

- Sasha would probably try and talk to any animals near by

- Connie would be laughing and saying shit like “SASHA the dog can’t fuckin’ talk back 🙄”

- They spend their hangovers bitching and whining about how much it hurts

- Probably would wrap themselves up in blankets in a dark room and snacks and spend the whole day just waiting it out

Jean:

- Same thing as Eren

- Except he also gets more flirty, but it’s not good and usually he ends up embarrassing himself and scaring away the girl he was talk to

- Finds Connie and Sasha and joins them on their shenanigans if he ain’t arguing with Eren

- Probably claims he has really good ideas and then next thing you know all three of them are in a police station and it’s definitely his fault

- “What the fuck made you think taking that woman’s dog was okay”

- “It looked SAD, Connie! And Sasha helped me!”

- “NO—“

- Spends his hangover day with Sasha and Connie

Historia:

- The most giggly fucking drunk you will ever meet

- Laughs at EVERYTHING and asks really dumb questions because suddenly she just has one brain cell

- Also a lightweight just not as bad as Armin

- Ymir has to babysit her and then when Ymir is drunk is the other way around

- They take good care of each other

- Ymir thinks she’s the most adorable thing ever and probably gives into every dumbass request Historia makes

- “Ymir! Let’s go out to eat!”

- “Hist, it’s 2am.”

- “So? There’s someplace open somewhere!”

- “...Fine.”

- Also sleeps her hangover off but Ymir has some water and pain meds ready for whenever she wakes up

Ymir:

- Oh dear lord she becomes very cocky and flirty

- Hangs off Historia’s shoulders the whole time and absolutely starts a fight with whoever looks at her gf

- Eren tried to fight her once and he got his shit beat

- The next day she would be so dramatic about how much pain she’s in just to get Historia to pay attention to her

- And ofc Historia always does < 3

The Warriors:

Reiner:

- Mans becomes such a an emotional bro

- Like he will throw an arm around literally anyone and go off about how much he just thinks they’re the darndest thing

- “Bert have I ever told you how great you are?”

- “All the time. Like a lot. You’ve said it 12 times in the last 10 minutes. Are you okay?”

- Completely denies it happened the next day and pretend he doesn’t feel like shit

- Bertholdt would find him dead to the world on the couch in some weird ass position and then force him to get up and go to bed

- “Dude you smell like ass.”

- “Shut up and just get me some water please.”

Bertholdt:

- Does not drink a lot at all especially around the 104th

- He has to make sure nobody fucking dies, especially Reiner and Annie

- He would have a beer or five with Reiner every so often and then he’s like really clingy and cuddly

- He’s embarrassed about it the next day and also pretends he never got hammered

- Sometimes one of the 104th will walk into their house and Bertholdt would be squished betweeen the fridge and the counter

- He has somehow made his way into the kitchen and will just fall asleep it the weirdest fucking places

- Reiner leaves him there because he feels to bad to move him when he looks strangely comfortable all twisted

- Whenever he and Reiner drink together they will send drunk snaps to their friends

- “Bertholdt just messaged me???”

- “Is he with Reiner?”

- “Yeah I think s— oh no.”

Annie:

- Doesn’t drink a lot either but when she does she also tries to start fights with people

- It never works out and she ends up having really deep and heartfelt conversations with them

- Like I imagine her trying to fight Armin and he’s just shaking I’m his boots and then she just stops and says

- “Ya know, sometimes I get really sad...”

- And so begins the start of their friendship

- For all the AruAni shippers I feel like she would be really protective of Armin and make sure nobody starts anything with him

- Or if they’re with Eren and the gang she will throw hands with Eren if he tries to drag Armin into his disputes

- She also probably hangs around Mikasa to make sure she’s okay and to pretend to hate it whenever Mikasa lays on her shoulder or thigh because she feels sick

- Banysits Reiner and Bertholdt whenever they’re drinking together, and then bullies the fuck out of them the next day

- “You guys are dumbasses.”

- “It was REINER’S idea!”

The Veterans-

Levi:

- DOES NOT DRINK even though he absolutely would

- He like becomes such a fucking mom lowkey especially whenever the kids are getting out of hand

- He’s dealing with a bunch of toddlers plus Hange and Erwin come on

- “Don’t touch that.”

- “Put that down.”

- “Quit yelling.”

- He never offer to clean them up or get them anything because that’s disgusting, however he does make sure everybody is at okay before leaving

- Like that they’re all breathing or nobody is missing

- After that he’s out and then the next day he just stares at them like the most disappointed parent ever

- He tolerates Hange and Erwin a little more, like they both get clingy and he actually lets them just hang off of him or something even tho he hates it

- Would probably hold Hange’s hair back if she throws up, or at least make sure it’s tied up. He has to resist the urge to vomit himself because he just cannot handle it at all

- But then he would just leave her on the bathroom floor asleep

Erwin:

- Oh boy he probably gets so emotional

- The complete opposite of his usual personality it’s so fucking funny

- Will cry about anything and once again like Reiner and Hange will talk about how great you are

- Doesn’t remember SHIT the next day and literally has no clue he acts like this and refuses to believe it whenever somebody tells him

- Hange recorded it once and he just “😐 Delete that, please.”

- Hangs around Levi and is very grateful that he lets Erwin be an annoyance

Hange:

- Tells the kids to be careful with alcohol and then immediately is found face down in a bush

- She becomes like 10 times more bubbly and absolutely batshit

- Laughs really loudly at everything

- She and Armin would get into excited like half conversations about fun science facts or whatever

- Like they absolutely geek the fuck out

- She also probably goes off about how much she loves everyone

- “LEVIIIIII!!! You’re so WOMDERFUL!”

- “Thanks. Now get off of me, bitch.”

- Levi has to babysit her and Erwin LMAO he’s the designated driver every single time

- Always knows the perfect cure for a hangover so she doesn’t usually have a really bad one

This turned out A LOT longer than I thought it would be, oops! Anyway I love doing these so I’m gonna start making more. I will probably do a lot for AOT and Hetalia so 😗✌️ prepare for cringe

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ackerfics · 3 years

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slow dance with you — mikasa ackerman

— goth!mikasa ackerman x soft!female reader (modern au)

— warnings: slight mention of alcohol, pure rotten fluff

— summary: after gaining some courage from the drinks she had in the party and from the advice she got from her friends, mikasa is ready to become your girlfriend.

— word count: 3.9k

— author’s notes: i would like to thank the anon who gave me some ideas for goth!mikasa, you are so amazing !! thank you for the small headcanons. and since we’re on the topic of writing abt goth!mikasa, i couldn’t help but pair her up with a classic soft girl who likes to wear pink at every time of the day. this dynamic is based on marceline and princess bubblegum so i hope you enjoy !!

p.s. the reader will have dyed hair here, if this is not your cup of tea, just let this fly by your dash.

listen to this while reading.

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“She dyed her hair pink,” came a dazed yet mesmerized tone.

“You’re staring at her again.”

Mikasa jumped on her seat at Eren’s nonchalant observation. She whipped her head to her best friend, his attention directed on his laptop, hands flying across the keyboard as he typed out the next few words in his essay. Noticing the incredulous look the black-haired girl was shooting him, Eren rose an eyebrow before rolling his eyes. Mikasa huffed, crossing her eyes with a subtle hue of red on her cheeks, complimenting her dark lipstick. “I am not staring,” she mumbled. “Shut up, Eren.” She looked away from her subject of interest but continued shooting small glances.

Eren sighed, running his hand through his hair. He was always one of the witnesses of his best friend slash sister being meek around her crush. At first, he was teasing her because not going to lie, Mikasa’s crush is a pretty person but as their years in college made them juniors, Eren will be the reckless idiot that he is (courtesy of Armin) and set Mikasa up. But he liked to live his life out first — Mikasa will probably curse him with that spellbook she bought from the antique bookshop they encountered in their little exploration back when they were first-years. “Mikasa, why don’t you take the chance and confess to her? It’s not going to be the end of the world.”

“If she rejects me? What then?”

“Then that’s the next problem that you will have to face.” The brown-haired boy turned back to his essay. He stared at his laptop screen blankly before spewing out curses. “Now, I forgot what to write next! Damn it.” He picked up his iced coffee and drank from the metal straw as his life depended on it.

Mikasa rolled her eyes at her best friend’s first statement. “Gee, thanks for the advice. It was very much appreciated.”

“Glad to be of help.”

There was a thud on their table that made the two look up from their respective activities. Eren had a scowl on his face because for the nth time this day, he was interrupted from finishing his essay (for fuck’s sake, he doesn’t want to fail Ackerman’s class). Mikasa blinked from scrolling through her crush’s Twitter account (the last post she wrote was about how Levi Ackerman, Mikasa’s relative and everyone’s Anthropology professor) and fixed her attention on their blonde friend, Armin. He looked too bright after a round of morning classes, something that Eren doesn’t comprehend. The blue-eyed young man has always been the rational and genius third of their little group. There wasn’t a time where Armin’s advice got a situation to erupt in flames. It was either the situation became an inferno instead (Eren) or nobody had the guts to do it (Mikasa).

“Hey, guys!” Armin greeted, arranging his side of the table, meticulously placing each component of his lunch in front of him. “How were your morning classes?”

“Shit,” Eren spat out.

“Of course, it is.”

“They were alright,” Mikasa shrugged.

“Figured.” Armin glanced at his friend’s sides of the table, nodding at Mikasa’s balanced lunch while blankly staring at Eren’s laptop. The device should’ve been a good tray of lunch. “I thought you were eating lunch, Eren? That’s what you said in your text.”

“Can’t,” the brown-haired boy huffed. He gestured at his iced coffee without taking his eyes off the laptop. “I guess, this counts as my lunch.”

“When’s that essay due?”

“In about,” Eren looked at the time on his laptop, “three hours. Ackerman is my first period later. That fucking terror professor has no mercy when it comes to this. Can he just piss off for once? Mikasa, do you even tell him to get laid? Because I think that would solve his attitude. I swear to God, he’s getting more pissed every damn day.”

“Wow, I guess getting my short, grumpy, middle-aged uncle to start his sex life will be a nice conversation starter,” Mikasa drawled, half-lidded, bored eyes reading every tweet her crush has posted for the entire week. Mikasa couldn’t help but smile at one post about a new movie her crush just watched, saying that it was now a new favorite. She was tempted to give a heart on every single post but that would it weird because they never followed each other despite the small interactions they shared in between classes. With a sigh, she looked up, only to be met with Eren’s unamused stare. Raising an eyebrow, she asked, “What? Do you think that would work, Eren? Levi is probably a virgin his whole life and will continue his record until he’s all shriveled up.” Eren blanched at the image. “Just finish your homework and stop complaining.”

“I’m trying!”

“You’re not trying hard enough, that’s for sure. If you just started that essay the day he assigned it to your class, you would have finished it way before the deadline.”

Eren pointed at Mikasa with narrowed eyes. “Don’t even go there, Mikasa. I have a life aside from being a sleep-deprived college student.”

“I mean, she’s got a point, Eren.” Armin immediately rose his hands in defense when Eren shifted his glare from the black-haired young woman to him. “You always tend to procrastinate in the most impeccable timing that we sometimes have to remind you of your backlogs. And now, here you are, doing things last minute when you could’ve prevented the rush by doing it immediately.”

“Thanks for slapping the reality to my face, you two,” Eren dryly replied, going back to his essay for the final time. “And by the way, Armin, give Mikasa some solid advice that she will finally follow because she’s making googly eyes at Miss Pretty two tables from us a couple of minutes before you arrived. You know, the love of her life?”

Armin roamed his eyes in the lunch hall and sure enough, there was Mikasa’s goddess sitting with her group of friends. There was that brown-haired girl that was dubbed as the Potato Girl for eating mashed potatoes during Ackerman’s class (the professor told the class his rules of no eating or going out of the room while he’s discussing the moment the girl took a spoonful of her snack). A young man with a buzz cut snorting at what the brown-haired girl said. Armin remembered sharing a class with him. He never got the chance to introduce himself because the young man was sleeping throughout the lecture. There was usually a fourth person in the little group but it seems like he was running late or already in his class. That person was Eren’s sworn frenemy, the reason for that relationship was unknown to this day.

The three people at the table all stood up, the brown-haired girl and the taller young man leading the way. Armin instantly had an idea.

“Hey, [Name]!”

Mikasa nearly had whiplash from turning her head to Armin. “Armin?!” she hissed under her breath, face becoming hotter when you looked at their table, a bright smile lighting up your face. You called your friends, telling them to go on ahead without you, to which they nodded before walking towards the trio’s table. Her brain wasn’t processing the moment you lifted a hand to wave at whoever you were smiling at. Mikasa wished it was her. “Fuck,” she whispered, registering how cute you look. You donned a salmon pink plaid sundress and a white cardigan, matching with the bubblegum pink locks you let down. Her heart was hammering a thousand miles per second and there was no hope of stopping it.

“Hi, Armin,” you replied, stopping a few feet from Mikasa, who looked away from you to fix her wide-eyed stare on her empty plate.

“I was just going to ask if you already have a partner in our Molecular Biology lab?” The blue-eyed young man then turned to Mikasa and Eren. “I’m in the same class as her this year.”

“As if calling her here wasn’t that obvious,” Eren murmured, still typing out his essay.

“I don’t need your dry remarks right now, Eren, don’t want to ruin the atmosphere. So, [Name], you have a partner?”

You shook your head. “I think not. It would be great if we could be partners though. I need a break from the people I’ve been partnered with throughout college.”

He gave you a sympathetic smile. It was true, though. Most of the grouping during your first years of college were all set up by the teachers so the students really had no say on the matter at hand. Even Armin was exposed to a variety of students, most of them being too slacking to participate or too overbearing with their suggestions that they have no plans of doing. He nodded with a smile, “I’ll be sending an email to Professor Zoe about this and we’re done.” He glanced behind you, noticing that your two friends weren’t there anymore. “I’m sorry for holding you up. I’m pretty sure you have a class after lunch. See you around?”

You waved him off. “It’s fine, I told them to go ahead since Sasha has a class scheduled right after lunch and Connie had to nap in his dorm. And I don’t have any class the whole afternoon, except for an online session so yeah, see you around, Armin.” You acknowledge Eren with a nod, to which he responded with a cool expression (as if his mind wasn’t a mess from the cramming), and gave a soft smile to Mikasa, “Bye, Mikasa.” And you were off to your dorm, leaving behind two amused men and an awestruck Mikasa.

The black-haired young woman was hyperventilating the moment you disappeared from the lunch hall, hands clenched on top of her black shorts. She regretted wearing a thin, long-sleeved striped sweater under her black shirt because it was so fucking hot after that encounter. Her entire body was vibrating with too many emotions all at once, short-circuiting until she became a heap of flustered mess in front of her best friends. “Oh, my God,” she muttered like a prayer. She definitely needed one after seeing you all pretty in pink. It was too much for her soul because you two are a perfect match this time. Her grommet belt and choker were not helping because she couldn’t fucking breathe.

“Mikasa, breathe,” Armin reminded beside her. “Yeah, that’s it.”

Once she regained her composure, Mikasa realized she probably looked like a gaping fish. “Oh, my God! I’m so sure that this time, she thinks I’m weird. My name is the only one she mentioned aside from Armin which is saying something because she’s classmates with him. But why did she say goodbye to me? Oh, my God, she’s giving me so many butterflies right now.”

“Your gay is showing,” Eren pointed out calmly.

“Eren, not the time,” Armin murmured, hovering his hands over Mikasa’s back.

“Just wanted to alleviate the tense atmosphere. No need to get so worked up.”

“But, Mikasa, your feelings for her are showing.”

Eren clapped his hands, pointing a finger at Armin. “That, my friend, is a genius observation.”

Ignoring the green-eyed man, Armin continued, “I think it’s time you confess to her. Three years is a pretty long time pining for a person. In the end, her knowing your feelings will be inevitable. That is if you have no plans in letting her know.”

“Of course, I want her to know,” Mikasa murmured, fiddling with the sleeves of her striped long-sleeves.

“I heard that there’s a party this Saturday in Reiner’s frat,” Eren told them, meeting both of his friends’ eyes over the top of his laptop screen. “We’re in the same football team with Jean. The horseface is a friend of your girl,” he nodded at Mikasa, who erupted in a sputter of her crush not being her girl, “okay, not your girl — yet. As I was saying, [Name] is good friends with Jean and if Jean is there, Miss Pretty in Pink will be, too. That’s your chance to ask her out, Mikasa.” He met the blinking gray eyes of his best friend. “The question is, are you up for that?”

-

“You were staring at her so hard at lunch again.”

You looked up from your book to acknowledge Sasha entering your dorm room after a whole afternoon of packed lectures. The brown-haired young woman was so tired that she immediately plopped on top of her bed on the other side of the room. At first, you didn’t register what she said because you were preoccupied with your book. You chose to indulge the night in a good book because it has been a long time since you’ve done that. With furrowed eyebrows, you asked, “Can you repeat what you said, Sasha?”

Sasha tilted her head to look at you with one eye uncovered by her duvet. Her hair fluttered after puffing out a breath of disbelief. “Oh, don’t pretend that you have no idea, Miss Pretty in Pink.”

“That’s because I didn’t catch what you said,” you replied, gesturing at your novel. “And what’s with that Miss Pretty in Pink nickname? Did some of the students around campus started that?”

“Sort of,” Sasha hummed. She sat up from her bed and took out her phone from her backpack lying on the floor. You watched the whole time she stretched her arm without changing her position on her bed. With her phone in hand, she opened her Twitter account. “Actually, a friend of mine tweeted it, wait, I’m just going to scroll through my Likes tab to find her tweet. Oh, here it is.” Sasha showed you her screen, patiently waiting for you to take the device from her hand to get a closer look. Her hopeful smile turned into a small pout when you made no moves in doing so. “Take my phone and see for yourself.”

You sighed, following her pleas. “It’s probably just someone from the volleyball team. You know how some of them never stopped following me around campus. Can’t they take the hint that they’re not my type?”

“This person is much better than those himbo simps following you around. She’s an amazing person behind that shy exterior of hers.”

You only hummed, blankly staring at your roommate’s phone before your eyes widened in realization. Your eyes skimmed over and over again at the handle, mkackerman, beside the display picture of a short-haired girl in pigtails. It was the girl that managed to capture your attention during your first year at Eldia University. The girl with an air of mystique that the stars are jealous of. You always admired her from afar, appreciating her style each day. But your admiration was getting replaced with something more at the five words she tweeted.

You’re so pretty in pink.

Roses bloomed in your cheeks, complimenting your pink hair the longer you gawked at her short post.

“What?” you breathed out after a full minute of silence.

“Mm-hmm,” Sasha hummed with a smug smile. “And who dyed her hair pink impulsively last weekend?” She intentionally looked at you with sharp eyes, her smile turning into a smirk full of mischief. In actuality, Sasha knew of Mikasa’s crush on you since they were acquainted with each other. It was an embarrassing first meeting between the two, with Sasha latching on a random person’s arm in the station and it turned out to be Mikasa. The two became great friends after that, well, after Mikasa lowered her guard down, leaving her pocket knife safely tucked underneath her checkered skirt. It was Sasha who managed to make Mikasa confess of her undying love for you, the former squealing her heart out in the library. (They were kicked out after that.)

“I don’t know,” you denied. “There could be a couple of people in the campus who thought that spontaneously dyeing their hair pink is an awesome idea.” You threw your hands in the air, giving back Sasha her phone right after.

“Trust me. Mikasa doesn’t have any interest in any other girl other than a special someone I know.”

You chose to ignore her, turning back on the discarded book on top of your covers. The words flew around your mind, aggravating you until you placed the novel on your lap. A defeated sigh came out of your lips. “Okay, let’s go out for some dinner.” You stretched, switching your pajama bottoms for a pair of loose jeans, and leaving your button-down pajama top on. The people in public will never know your top is a part of a pajama set. As you ducked down to roll the bottom of your jeans, you hear Sasha’s bed shuffling. Sitting up, you regarded her with an inquisitive raise of an eyebrow. “Spill it.”

“Oh, alright. Jean told me to bring you to a party.”

You stood up, patting your lap of imaginary dust, placing your things and book inside your tote bag. “Tell him no. I have a written exam coming up and I don’t want to fail one of my majors. He can manage without one person in our friendship group.”

Sasha huffed, mimicking your actions. “This will be the last time!”

“You said that the previous party you pulled me to.” You narrowed your eyes at her. “I couldn’t get up for a whole day because of that party. Don’t forget your wallet.”

“Yes, ma’am.” Sasha threw her wallet in her small bag, throwing the strap over her shoulder. “I promise that this will be the last time, I’ll even call Connie for the witness of my pact!” She placed a heartfelt palm over her chest, lifting her chin a little in the air. “I solemnly swear I am … keeping my promise.”

“You hesitated.”

The brown-haired girl giggled sheepishly, scratching the back of her neck. “It’s kind of hard not to continue the quote from Harry Potter. You can’t blame me for that!”

“I’ll think about it, okay?”

“You better because Mikasa will be there.”

You blinked at her statement. “What does this have to do with her?”

Your roommate looped her arm with yours, pulling you in the direction of the elevators. “Because,” it sounded like she was talking to a child, “you were staring at her earlier during lunch period. I understand that because Mikasa looks so good every second of the day but there was something different about the way you’re staring at her.” She tapped her finger on her chin. “Let me see, there’s some pizzaz there.”

“The pizzaz you’re talking about is me admiring her make-up — nothing more.”

“Whatever you say,” came Sasha’s sing-song voice. “I will be the first one who will say ‘I told you so’ to your face when you two start dating.”

-

The night of the party was not as bizarre as you thought.

Sure, there were people having shots in the living room but there weren’t any extreme scenarios lying around unlike some of the parties Connie and Jean went to. It was mostly catching up with old friends or making connections with strangers by ranting about the education system of your university. All in all, it was a fun night, yet here you are, holding your cup of beer with two hands as you craned your neck to get a glimpse of Sasha. Your roommate disappeared as you turned to get a shot, leaving a confused you behind. To think you specifically asked Sasha to be by your side throughout the night. You cursed in your head, you being reliant on the presence of others surfacing. Your stress made you tip your head back, downing your drink in a go.

Without anything to do, you leaned back on the wall. Mind hazy, eyes glassy, you searched the living room for a spunky brown-haired girl that you were supposed to be buddies with. Instead of Sasha, you met gazes with a girl with stars for her eyes. She was equally mesmerized as she was staring straight at you. Everything became silent as your heartbeat resonated with hers. She was beautiful in her all-black outfit — a leather pencil skirt over fishnet stockings, cropped tank top, and combat boots. The two of you are contrasting with one another; her lipstick so dark whilst yours shone a pretty coral, her hair framing her face in a midnight pixie cut whilst yours were in pink waves cascading down, her entire appearance blending in the background whilst you were a beacon with your coordinating soft outfit.

God damn it, Sasha was right.

You are definitely falling in love with Mikasa Ackerman.

Mikasa who you saw reading tarot cards of her blonde friend. Mikasa who you bumped into during the opening ceremony two years ago. Mikasa who you discovered to have an affinity for electric guitars when you stumbled in one of the auditoriums, her department’s band having an audition. Mikasa who never meets your gaze because you make her nervous at how effortless you carry yourself.

But tonight, she never looked away from you, her eyes having an adoring yet determined shine.

She stopped in front of you, mere inches separating you two. You looked up at her, her combat boots making her taller than she already is. You saw her eyes flick to your lips, your breath hitching at the thought of having her dark lipstick on any part of your body. With a careful tilt of her head, Mikasa ducked her head a little to fully meet your eyes face to face. “I saw you’re alone,” her voice is still soft-spoken as if she was afraid that she was scaring you. It might be because of the liquid and verbal courage she got from drinking and listening to her best friends because Mikasa had no plans of letting you go tonight. “I thought you needed company.”

A breath came out of your lips, your proximity making Mikasa feel it. “Uhm, if it’s you, I don’t see why not?”

A large smile brightened Mikasa’s face before it dimmed as she lowered her gaze to your lips once more. “I’ve been waiting three years for this.”

Maybe your mind was too hazy with alcohol or it could be because you accepted your feelings for the black-haired girl, so you whispered, lips brushing against hers in the most addicting way possible, “Just kiss me, Mikasa.”

Her lips softly moved against yours in a slow dance, the inches separating you disappearing as Mikasa wrapped an arm around your waist. You lift a hand to cup her jaw, tilting your head to deepen the kiss and to brush your tongue with hers. You felt her shiver, biting your lower lip to make you open up more, with your whimpers tingling her hearing. Mikasa pulled away, trailing firm kisses on the skin where your shoulder meets your neck. Seeing the black kiss mark on your skin, she smiled and placed fluttering kisses on your neck up to your cheek. Opening your eyes, the silver grays in front of you have never been so beautiful. You returned the favor of placing kiss marks. You stood on your tiptoes, feeling Mikasa’s hand steadying you, and left a coral pink mark on the corner of her mouth.

Mikasa dipped her head, placing her lips close to your ear.

“I want to slow dance with you,” she sung to your ear. “I know all the other boys are tough and smooth and I got the blues. I want to slow dance with you.” Mikasa hid a small smile at your flustered expression. “So can I be your vampire queen, Bonnie?”

The moment you said yes, there was a shout in the crowds. “Hell yeah, your plan worked, Eren, Armin!”

You and Mikasa stared at each other with wide eyes before laughing.

“Let’s go ditch this party.”

“Thought you’d never ask, Bonnie.”

#attack on titan #aot #mikasa #Mikasa Ackerman #mikasa x reader #mikasa ackerman x reader #mikasa ackerman x you #aot x reader #snk x reader #snk imagines #snk anime #goth!mikasa #i am a sucker for this dynamic #attack on titan x reader

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omg-im-such-a-masochist · 3 years

Text

🎁🔥GUESS WHO?🔥🎁

Prompt: Y/N’s first day back to work from her vacation is also coincidentally her birthday, as the day goes by, one mysterious box is placed on her work table. The content of it is a devious surprise and Y/N needs to find out who is the mysterious person who dared to give her such a kinky birthday present.

Word count: Long-ish

Pairing: Roman Reigns x Reader

Warnings: +18, smut, bondage(handcuffs), use of a vibrator, fingering, rough sex, mentions of voyeurism, oral sex (female receiving), dirty talk, cursing.

My Roman lovers: @ziasaph, @reigns-5sos, @mindofasagittaruis

Notes: What a better way to start 2021, then with a Roman kinky fic?! I wish you all a Happy New Year loves, may 2021 be kinder to us all. Y’all know the drill loves,sorry for misspellings,english isn’t my first language (bla bla bla),check out my other stories if you’d like to(it would make your girl here very happy 😊) and if you’re comfortable with it,please let me know what you think? Some feedback is always welcomed and appreciated ❤️You can check out my other stories typing ‘masochist writes’ on the search bar on my page and my newest story as a fixed post.Okay,now let’s get to the fun part,shall we? Hope you’ll enjoy 😉

“Happy birthday, to you..” I turn around to the sound of a person singing, just to see Sasha Banks holding a chocolate cupcake and a present bag on her hands.

“Hi Sasha.” I smiled

“Happy birthday babe!” Sasha ran up to me, placing the cupcake on my working table and hugging me tightly.

“Thanks Sasha”

This was my first day back from my vacation, and coincidentally it was also my birthday, so I was excited to see some of the good friends I’ve made while working for the WWE as a chiropractor.

“Here this is for you!” Sasha handed me a present bag.

“Oh Sasha, you really didn’t have to-“

“Shush! I love you, so of course I would pamper you on your birthday” Sasha said as I opened the bag to find a pair of Louboutin’s I had my eyes on for quite sometime, but couldn’t afford it.

“Sasha, are you insane? I can’t accept these! It’s way too expensive!” I gasped

“I am perfectly sane, you will accept these and I don’t care if you think they’re too expensive! I love you, you’re one of my best friends in this company and a human being with a heart made of gold. So if there is someone who deserves these is you” She happily said

“Sasha, I don’t even know how to thank you enough” I whispered with tears on my eyes

“Just say you will be my friend forever babe” She winked

“I don’t need presents to be your friend love”

“That’s why I gave it to you. I don’t care how much they cost, I just want to make my best friend happy on her birthday”

I hugged her and whispered ‘thank you’ on her ear

“So, who else has came here today?” She asked

“Oh! Bayley, Charlotte, Xavier, Kofi, Cesaro, Big E, Alexa, Naomi, Jey, Becky, Seth, Finn, Renee and Dean” I said, listing my close friends

“I was the last one then? Damn it!”

“It’s ok, I know you were busy today love”

“So...no Roman?” She whispered

“No, no Roman” I answered slightly disappointed.

Sasha along with Bayley and Renee were the only 3 people who knew about my stupid crush on Roman Reigns. It’s so stupid of me to think that a man like him would ever look at someone like me.

If he would ever look at someone on this company, it wouldn’t be the thick girl who worked as a chiropractor and yes one of the beautiful toned Divas of this company.

But still I couldn’t help but daydream about having him on top of me.

“Maybe he doesn’t know it’s your birthday?” Sasha tried to make it less uncomfortable

“Really Sasha? He’s friends with Dean! Everybody knows Dean is an open mouth, loud as fuck and can’t keep it to himself not even if his life depended on it...Roman just chose to ignore it, and it’s fine. We’re not close or anything so, I wasn’t expecting him to show up at my office door and fuck me on top of this table” I lied while chuckling weirdly

“Let’s be honest babe, everybody secretly wants Roman Reigns to fuck them on top of a table!” We both laughed at her statement before she continued “It’s his loss anyways babe”

“Yeah I guess so...”

I was making my way back to my office, from the women’s locker room, when a big black box with a golden ribbon called my attention on top of my desk.

“What the hell?” I said as I approached the box carefully. All of my closest friends had already wished me a happy birthday and gave me their presents so this was, to say the least, weird and unexpected.

I saw a blood red card on top of it, so I opened to find the handwritten saying

‘I hope these will make your birthday night unforgettable. Can you guess who’ve bought these for you? ;)’

Ok, that’s pretty fucking weird! I thought

From the corner of my eye I saw Sasha passing by and loudly whispered

“Sasha! Come here”

She entered my office “What’s up girl? Are you ok? You look scared”

I closed my office door and locked, and made my way back to the table by her side.

“Ok, I’m feeling a little paranoid. I just came back to my office to find this box and this card. Here” I handed the card to her and she red silently.

“Did you look what’s inside of it?” Sasha said

“Nope. And to be honest I don’t know if I can..what if it’s like a prank or something?”

“Well, there’s only one way to find out Y/N”

She opened the box, inside of it there was a fancy red paper, I took it out of the way to reveal what was underneath it and I tell you I almost passed out.

Inside the box there was a lavender and purple (my favorite colors) vibrator, it was actually pretty cute...two pairs of handcuffs, lube, nipples clamps and a whip.

“Oh my gosh” Sasha gasped as she took the clamps on one hand and the whip on the other. “Someone wants to get kinky with you girl!” She examined the items carefully

“What in the actual fuck?” I whispered shocked “Give me that!” I took the items out of her hand, shoved back into the box and quickly closed with the black lid.

“Jesus, I can get fired if someone sees that in my office! Who the hell would do that?”

“Someone who wants to get some! And wants it rough” She chuckled

“Sasha it’s not funny! I could not have a job tomorrow morning if someone from the company found these”

“Who do you think did this?” She asked seriously

“How am I supposed to know? I have no fucking clue!”

“Maybe someone who’s name starts with an R...” She smirked

“R?... What ar-... Oh hell no! Nu uh, that’s impossible!” She couldn’t be implying that Roman was behind this, was he? No! Of course not, that’s a dumb thing to think of...but a part of me wished it was him, even though I know it wasn’t.

“Why impossible? You’re a gorgeous woman Y/N! You two would make a beautiful couple, plus, I‘ve seen his handwriting before and I’m pretty sure it’s quite similar to this one” She said as she inspected the card closely.

“Obviously someone wants to make fun out of me, so I’ll just pretend this never happened” I took the card out of her hand and shoved inside the box.

“Or someone has an eye on you for a while and decided to finally make a move”

“Sasha, please don’t tell this to anyone”

“Your secret is safe with me babe. Just promise that when your secret admirer finally show up, you’ll tell me if you guys made a good use of his presents” She laughed

“You’re the worst!” I laughed along

I made my way back to my hotel room later that evening with my hands so full of packages I could barely walk. I opened the door and carefully placed the bags, along with the black box, on the floor.

I went to the bed and sat down on the edge, while I stared at the box.

*Could Sasha be right? Could it be Roman who did this?* Was the only thought that crossed my mind

I decided to forget all about it and take a shower to wash off the day.

As I was rinsing my hair I heard some noise coming from the bedroom

*What the hell was that?*

I blamed on my super active mind and turned the shower off.

I got changed into some clean oversized t- shirt, and went full on commando. I was brushing my damp hair, when I decided to lay out the contents of the black box on the bed.

I roamed my eyes on each item slowly, until they stopped on the lavender and purple happiness. I turned the vibrator on and felt slightly tempted to use it.

*Oh fuck it! Happy birthday to me I guess”

I got rid of the t-shirt and lay down on the bed naked.

I closed my eyes, letting my mind imagine my wet dream, in form of a man... his face, his body, his cock and how I wish I could feel it inside of me, stretching me as I teased my clit with the vibrator.

I moaned Roman’s name and heard someone clear their throat on the foot of the bed. My eyes shot open and my heart nearly stopped beating when I saw who was in front of me. The vision was so unexpected that I even forgot I was naked.

“I see you liked my gift then” He smirked

“Wh- What are you doing here? How did you get inside of my room?” I whispered

“Does it matter?” His eyes had an evil glimpse to it

“Roman... I- I can explain” I begin to stutter

He placed his index finger on his lips in a shh motion and I stopped talking. He hungrily stared at every inch of my naked body, making me feel quite self conscious of the imperfections of it. I grabbed the blanket to cover my nakedness, he notice what I was about to do and yanked the blankets off the bed

“I’ve been waiting for years to see you like this, so don’t you dare cover yourself from me now”

He took off his shirt and pants leaving only his boxers on, from where I was laying I could see the outline of his hard cock and the wet spot of pre cum near of it’s head. He crawled on top of me slowly, like a predator, with dangerous eyes that were glued to my own.

“At first I was only gonna watch you... I wanted to see you pleasure yourself with my gifts, but when I saw your body fully naked on this bed moaning my name” He grunted “I couldn’t control myself, I couldn’t see this” He took the vibrator off my hand and placed on the bed by our side “Having all the fun with you, enjoying every part of your beautiful body, stretching your sweet pussy while my own cock only got to watch, he wants to have his own fun with you baby girl. He wants to make you feel real good” He leaned closer to my face, his lips brushing mine as he asked “Do you want that Y/N? Do you want my cock to make you feel good? Do you want it to stretch you out baby? Do you want it to fuck you hard and rough? Or do you prefer it slow and sweet? Do you want me to fuck you from behind?...Or maybe I should eat you out first huh? Eat that sweet pussy until you’re begging me to stop, I can’t wait to feel you come on my mouth...around my cock,milking it really nice” He growled “Tell me Y/N, what do you want?”

“I want it all, I want everything” I panted as he dry humped me

“Will you let me do whatever I want with you baby girl? What I’ve always wanted to do?”

“Yes”

He smiled satisfied, leaning to kissed me roughly and sloppily as he grabbed both of my wrists into one of his big hands pining it over my head.

“If anything I do bothers you or you feel like your not feeling it or don’t like it, you let me know ok?”

I nodded

“I need words baby girl”

“Yes, I understand”

“Good” He smiled and I felt something cold close around my wrists. I looked up to see the handcuffs around my wrists being closed on the headboard of the bed. Roman sat up and looked down do my naked body at his disposal.

“Fuck, you’re such a gorgeous sight” He said as he palmed his hard cock through his boxers. “I can’t wait to bury my cock deep inside you” He panted

“Roman, please do something” I whispered

His hands roamed the sides of my body until he stopped at my breasts as his hands squeezed them hard while pinching my nipples.

“These were made just for me. Do you see how they perfectly fit my hands? I can only imagine how even more beautiful your breasts will look with my cock sliding in between them” His eyes were glued on my breasts.

I tugged at my handcuffed hands, begging “Roman, please, I need- something”

“Let’s take a look on this pussy...are you wet for me Y/N?”

“Soaked”

He raised his eyebrows “Really? Let‘s see” Two of his fingers slides through my folds “Fuck baby girl, you are soaked. Jesus, we won’t even need lube” His fingers traced lazy circles around my clit, making me moan in pleasure. One callused finger slipped inside of me.

“Oh baby girl, you’re so tight, fuck I will barely be able to move. I can’t wait to feel your sweet little pussy stretch around my cock”

He took his finger out and cleaned with his tongue, humming in pleasure to the taste of my juices.

“You taste amazing, Y/N. Fuck I need more” He slide down my body placing his head between my thighs. His tongue gave a long lick from my entrance to my clit sucking it. Making his way back to my entrance again dipping his tongue inside of me, beginning to fuck me with his tongue.

“Oh my god, Roman, please fuck me! I need you inside of me please” I whined

“As you wish baby” He smirked

He slides his cock through my folds to lube it up, then places the head of his cock at my entrance

“Are you sure about this baby girl? ‘Cause once I start I won’t be able to stop myself”

“Roman, just fuck me already would you?” I said impatiently

He chuckled lightly saying “Easy tiger, we’ll take this slow, I don’t want to hurt you” Roman leaned down to peck my lips and returned to his previous position.

He started to slowly slide inside of me, inch by inch, painfully slow. He’s the biggest man I’ve ever been with, so I knew that we needed to take it slow, but fuck he feels so good I just wish he would roughly thrust into me, so I wiggle my hips to take more of him.

“Fuck Y/N, slow down! You’re too tight and I’m not exactly small, if you keep rushing things you’re gonna end up hurting yourself and I don’t want that”

“I know is just that your cock feels so fucking good, I just want you to fuck me Ro”

“Trust me baby, there’s nothing that I want more then fuck you senseless, but I want you to enjoy it as well ok?” He kissed my nose then my lips

When all of him was finally inside of me we both moaned loudly, I’ve never felt so full before and it was both a dream and a nightmare

“Motherfucker! Jesus fuck Y/N, you’re so fuckin- Oh my god.. I gotta focus ‘cuz I feel like at the slightest move I’ll cum” He pressed his forehead to mine as his thumb slowly traced circles on my clit.

“Roman” I gasped “Please don’t tease me like that, fuck it feels so fucking good” I cried as I felt my walls tighten around him

“Oh fuck!” Roman growled loudly “Don’t do that baby girl, don’t squeeze my cock like that, you’re gonna make m-“

“Move,please” I circled my hips

“Fuck it” He said as he forcefully grabbed my hips and begin to quickly thrust me.

“Oh Roman...harder, I need harder”

“Harder?” He chuckled “Like this?” He pounded into me mercilessly

“Yes! Just like that, oh please, don’t stop” “Fuck Y/N you’re going to get me addicted to you baby girl” He kissed my lips vigorously

“I say we should push you a little further..” Roman took the vibrator from the bed and placed on my clit.

“Ooohhh”

“Fuck, you look so beautiful baby girl, a whimpering mess underneath me”

“Ro- Roman I’m gonna cum”

“Cum baby, I wanna feel you cum around my cock”

And I did. My orgasm was so hard that my juices made a mess on Roman’s thighs and the bedsheets.

“Y/N, fuck baby...so fucking gorgeous, my messy girl” He chuckled “Where do you want me to cum baby?”

“Inside” I panted while I felt another mini orgasm come through me

“Fuck, I’m officially addicted to you baby girl. You’re my wet dream come true...gorgeous face, delicious body, perfect pussy..so tight for me. And on top of it all, you want my cum inside of you?! You are beyond perfect Y/N”

He thrusts into me 3 more times before finally cum, filling me up with his seed.

As we tried to recover our breaths, Roman uncuffed my wrists and placed a sweet kiss into each one.

“You ok baby girl?”

“Mhmm” I hummed

“Did I hurt you? Was I too rough?”

“No, of course not. You were perfect!”

“Good baby” He smiled

“Can I ask you something?”

“Sure thing baby”

“Why? Why me?”

“Why not you?” He asked sincerely while he brushed my hair with his fingers

“I don’t know, I can’t picture someone like you with someone like me.. I mean, there are so many beautiful women in the company that fit you better...I’ve never thought you could find me attractive”

“Are you serious? Have you looked yourself in the mirror? You’re gorgeous, so perfect Y/N. Yes, there are beautiful women in the company but they’re nothing compared to you baby. You stand out, exactly because you’re different from all of them. You’re unique”

“Still...I don’t know..”

“Oh so you don’t believe me? Maybe I’ll have to show you then”

I could feel his cock beginning to harden on my thigh

“Show me? How?”

“Well baby girl, good thing there are more items of the box for us to try it huh?”

“Us?”

“Yeah, you don’t really think that I’m gonna let you go right? Now that I’ve tasted you, you’ve got me hooked baby. We’ve got the whole night for me to change your mind about us together. And I bet you that I will” He smirked as he leaned down to kiss my neck...

What a great way to celebrate my birthday 🎁

#roman reigns one shot #roman reigns x reader #roman reigns #roman reigns fanfiction #roman reigns smut #roman reigns imagine #wwe one shot #wwe imagine #wwe fanfiction #wwe smut #masochist writes

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voiceless-terror · 3 years

Note

Ooooh what are your top 5 tma girls?

oh this is difficult....im not sure if there is any particular order, but here you go:

1. Daisy! She’s got a magnificent character arc, and I very much enjoyed the fact that she wasn’t ever really redeemed/forgiven, and that didn’t make her any less compelling for me. Also, her and Jon’s interactions are probably the only thing that got me through Season Four. Never thought that Daisy would start being the voice of reason, but hey. People change. And I’m also very partial to Fay Roberts voice <3

2. Melanie! As a Jon stan this seems counterintuitive, but they’re such similar characters at their core that handle things in completely different ways. Her anger (at herself and others) manifests outwardly and is very apparent, and you pretty much always know how she’s feeling, even if it’s conflicted. I love argumentative characters that don’t mince words- I’m not sitting there wondering what she’s ‘really’ trying to say. Her multiple Elias assassination attempts? Iconic. She also has one of my dream jobs, ghost hunter. C’mon.

3. Sasha, but I feel like a lot of that’s informed by my own headcanons. Don’t get me wrong, I love what we get in canon- she’s fucking wild, reckless, throwing herself into danger all the time. I would’ve loved to see more of her. But I feel like all of those traits leave us with a rich ground to play with outside of ‘mom friend’ and ‘team brain cell.’ She’s super weird!! Lean into it!

4. Annabelle Cane. I stan a spider queen. She’s delightfully ominous when she appears in statement- and her own statement was one of the most chilling, in my opinion. Now that we’ve finally gotten to hear her (that lisp, god I love it) I have fallen in love- for someone who’s so into manipulation, she also loves some on the nose, nerdy theatrics. I wish we’d gotten to spend more time with her and would’ve loved to see more of her dynamic with Jon. I feel like that could’ve been really revealing for the both of them, character wise. Sigh.

5. Agnes Montague, who we have never heard on the podcast xD Statements that feature her are some of my favorites, and I do love a messiah archetype that breaks the mold. The contradictions of her- as a child, saving that kid from hilltop road, and yet killing people in her own cult in fits of rage. Her strange connection with Gertrude. The way Arthur Nolan described her- "I saw the sun. So much - power and fire and rage inside of her, enough to burn the world and leave it nothing but desert. But to look at her, oh - It was too much for most. But it seemed so still, so stable. But it wasn’t calm. It was just - distant." I really think we could’ve had a lot more of her in the story. She will forever fascinate me!!

#asks #i THINK these are my favorites #another thing subject to change lmao #wiseandromeda #tma

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foxymoxynoona · 2 years

Note

okay, back on my bullshit. You’ve missed my existential crisis for Flux, am I right?🥰🥰

Alright CHAPTER 15: Kwang-su, I don’t like the dude. I don’t like his parties and I don’t like him talking to JK and I don’t like anyone talking to JK honestly lol. You know what I think I don’t like him just because he doesn’t do what I want him to do so don’t really take me into consideration here BUT technically I feel like he was being genuine in helping him out when jk told him everything. But still in my head everyone should root for them to get back together so, for now, Kwang-su is black listed. One thing that I already noticed last chapter was that I felt completely numb while reading about jk having sex with other people but, girl, I got A BAD STOMACHACHE SEEING SASHA DO THE SAME. Am I broken somewhere? Lol, am I jealous of Sasha?👀 for real, I wouldn’t want this to be like a subconscious response and justification for JK because “he has been actively hurt” and now I’m unknowingly mad at Sasha. I DON’T WANT TO BE. BABY NEEDS SOME SERIOUS HELP, and the fight she had with Michele proves it even more. AND SHE DIDN’T EVEN TELL MAXI, YOU KNOW SHIT IS HITTING THE FAN WHEN THAT HAPPENS. She is pushing everything and everyone away as if she is a bomb on the verge of exploding and she wants to limit the casualties. Oh and homeboy needs to be careful with who he fucks. No one needs a scandal and most importantly YOU DON’T HAVE TO GO TO THAT FUCKING PARTY ABORT MISSION FUCK GO BACK.

CHAPTER 16: okay the feeling of numbness about jk having sex with other people? Yeah, forget it🤡 As soon as I saw Hallie my heart sank to my asshole BUT IT WOULD’VE BEEN BETTER THAT WAS HAPPENED NEXT. THE MAKEUP NOONA? REALLY? ON COCAINE?!!? “You’re gone and I gotta stay high to keep you off my mind” but boy you took that literally💀💀

Maxi? Favorite character, hands down. He’s there even when he is not, if you find this kind of person you’ve found gold. I love their dynamics. AND THE INTERACTION BETWEEN SASHA AND JK? I’m honestly a mess. Seriously, that was ducking heartbreaking. Comforting and depressing at the same time? As soon as he arrived I though I was just going to cringe because lord knows I hate confrontation and I honestly could never meet an ex after breaking up, burn my shit but don’t make me look at you ever again✨. BUT NO IT WAS SO BEAUTIFUL AND TRAGIC AND REALISTIC AND I WANNA CRY. The way he got her through her panic attack, THE WAY HE WAS SO ACTIVELY HELPFUL TO MAKE SURE SHE WAS IN GOOD HANDS. please, where do I sign up to get a jk, I need him😭

When they talk all their shit out I hope maturity will stand above it all. Like, they made some questionable decisions but, even if and WHEN they get mad about it, they will find a way to settle it in the past. Is this me projecting into a happy future already? Yes, yes it is🤧

Too much? Fuck, I’m so sorry, truly. I wait for a week and this happens. Sorry😢

🌸

I feel like I've done my job with readers having such divided feelings about Kwangsu. yesssss.

JK and Sasha seeing each other again is also not something I personally could have managed, lol. I saw several readers previously point out that it just didn't feel right for them to just be GONE. That abrupt loss followed by them both traveling absolutely created this sort of weird limbo space, they both felt it, they both went wild during it, and this crossing paths again was a reality check, and neither of them liked what they saw in themselves or each other. I'd point out too that I suspect they both wanted it to happen. They both expected the other one to be doing better than they were. JK texted sasha, not Michele, about getting his stuff back. Sasha agreed to be the one for the trade off. They could TOTALLY have avoided this. And as another reader pointed out... did JK really want/need his stuff back? This dude who will fucking delete Decalcomania just because*?? He is not nostalgic about things and yet... here we are.

Anyway, definitley not too much, you know I selfishly love hearing from you and I know other readers do too :D

*as someone who is very nostalgic about things and work, no, I will never be over this

#🌸anon #asks #flux

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deepdisireslonging · 4 years

Text

Orphan Requests

I have an inbox full of requests and I cannot answer them. So I am opening them up to any writer who has the inspiration to fulfill them! Writers, if you’d like to reply to this post that you’re taking a fic, I’ll make a note so the anon requesters can know where to look for their fics. Thank you guys for any and all help!

In order of longest sitting, with wrestlers requested in bold:

Hello!! I’m here to make yet another request if you don’t mind. I’m guessing I have a thing for short guys being dom af, because now I really need some dom!chad gable fic in my life. Can you write a fic where he’s really sweet but controlling? - requested by @khaleesikross

could you do a cena x male reader with it being cenas first time with a guy? and he’s really rough?

kevin owens x male reader where kevin lost a match and is angry backstage and just smutty smut?

Hi hope you are doing well; can you please do headcanons or a small fic of Lince dorado with a male medic s/o, like he gets injured and has to be put on painkillers n' s/o has to take of a very handsy lucha. You can make it as their already dating or just co-workers, whatever is easiest for you to do.😃 - requested by @vixxzial

[Completed] Hi! I love your writing about WWE! ❤ I saw that you have open requests. If it's not too much to ask, can you write two things about Ricochet? Dating with Ricochet would including / Sex with Ricochet would including / Thanks! ❤

Could you maybe do a request please? The Revival x Reader where maybe the reader is a female member of The Revival and they are currently fueling with The O.C. Maybe Gallows accidentally injures the reader during a match and the boys end up loosing it. They attack The O.C. And go and take care of their girl? Just a bunch of fluff and smut please if you can find somewhere for it, if not a bunch of sick fluff is fine! 😂🤗

I'm not sure if you'll take this request at the moment (which is totally fine and understandable) but whenever you get time, can you do a Finn Balor x Virgin Male Reader fic, where it's reader's first time (he bottoms for Finn) and Finn is just super sweet to the reader during the whole experience? ❤️❤️❤️ - requested by @issacloveswwe (Claimed by @neversatisfiedgirlfics) {Thanks, love!}

I know it might be a while, but could you possible do a real fluffy/smut fic of Drew Gulak and The Reader? Maybe the Reader is Drew’s valet and real life fiancé and they celebrate together after he wins the Cruiserweight Championship from Tony in the Triple threat between the two and Akira? 🤗❤️

[Completed] Hi is it alright if I request something really smutty as a FxF with Becky Lynch? If possible could you use my name Alexandra? - claimed by @lynchstan-516

this is probably a weird request, but -- I'd like to see some smut where the female reader is close friends with Seth and Becky, who are in an open relationship (but the reader doesn't know that they are, just that they're together.) Becky sees that the reader is stressing herself out on the road, and gives Seth his blessing to take care of her... ;) (Becky/reader content also encouraged!!) - claimed by @lynchstan-516

Hi! This is my first time requesting smut. I was wondering if you could do a Becky Lynch smut where she is sure that she is straight until one night when she shares a hotel room with Y/N. At first everything is platonic, but Becky starts to lose her cool as Y/N continues to tease her. Rough and kinky smut, please. 😉 I’ll leave the rest of the details up to you. Thank you ❤️ - claimed by @lynchstan-516

From prompt list one all for one story 40,42,44 with Luke Gallows please and thank u - requested by @braunstrowmangirl (We could never get down to which list they were talking about, so either ask them or pick your favorite prompt list?)

Can you please write something with dom Rhea, Shayna and Reader, please?

Hi love! Would you happen to write for Travis Banks? (NXT UK) I think I have a plot in mind but I just wanted to be sure!

Hi! May I ask you to write some Samoa Joe/Kevin Owen's smut? They don't have anything at all T_T

Oooo! Can I send in a request? I’m thinking with Either Dash Wilder, Noam Dar, or Jordan Devlin (I couldn’t choose I’m sorry! 😩) and a Female reader. Like a Love/Hate story where they’re always at each other’s throats but likes it’s also like ‘I can fuck with him/her but if anyone else does imma rip their heads off their shoulders’ because they secretly love them? and it’s just smutty and fluffy?

U was wondering if you could write some AOP smut and/or a threesome with an oc? That would be wonderful because I love them and I can't seem to find any. Thank you! - requested by @queenofdiamonds2019

Could you possibly do a Dash Wilder x Female!Reader? The reader is a women’s wrestler and The Revival’s manager as well as Dash’s longtime girlfriend. The both are cast members on Total Divas and maybe one day while out with some of the ladies filming she gets sick, this causing the other girls to have her take some pregnancy tests and maybe just a really cute fluffy thing where she announces to Dash that she’s gonna be a daddy and to Scott that he’s gonna be an uncle?

Can You Please Do A Drew Mcintyre X Male Reader. Where Drew Is Really Rough(Degrading,Chocking Etc...) And If You Could Can You Pls Do Daddy Kink - requested by @themangetrowdy

Could you do a smut where the reader is a WWE wrestler and Dean comes to cheer her on and the reader gets badly hurt but wins in the end and he patches her up in the locker room when the match is over and it ends in smut? This idea just came to me cause I love Supernatural and I love Sasha Banks.

Hi! Is there anyway you can write a Jordan Devlin x Female!Reader imagine?? Based off his World’s Collide Title won please? ❤️

Tagging some writers who might be interrested:

@neversatisfiedgirlfics @team-elias @ladytea19 @madamaholmes @chasingeverybreakingwave @taryn-dibiase@truconsciousramblings @toosleepyforyou@greygirlmoxley @winged-time-criminal @superrezzy00 @tessa-no-curr @baratomaya @wwesmutandstuff @mother-canuckin-geek@crookedmoonsaultpunk @baloraffe @heelsamizayn @poisonarrow24 @vebner37 @calwitch @new-zealand-chic @minapasch @itsicantbelievethis666 @laura-devitt @donnaintx @ashleykaiba @xladyxfatex @gold–gucciempress @the-carter-mob-don @demonqueen29 @writtingrose @mondaynightrollin @baronsbelleevangeline @theworldofotps @haven-raven012591 @writinglionqueen @thatnerdwriter @thatpanpal @eternallytaylorsblog @artemisapalla316 @cryingsuplex @sassymox @demonslunacy @scuzmunkie @alternateafterthought

#open requests for the taking #orphan requests #please somebody write these #because it's not going to be me #Unfortunately #hear from the writer #requests

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dorksmithery · 4 years

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1, 2, 6, 10, 15, 17, 23, 34, 41, 44, 45, and 50? :O

1: How long have you been in the fandom?

I’ve been a huge fan of the show since childhood but I’ve only really started interacting with the fandom as a whole for a year give or take

2: Favorite character?

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Gee I wonder who it could possibly be lmaoo

6: OTP?

If you know anything about me, its that im mutishipping trash and OTP to me means One Tremendously long list of Parings If I had to pick one though, I’ll die for Poly!Marina and Aiacos/Shion/Dohko/Kagaho Oh look even when I’m supposed to pick one I can’t decide lmao

10: Favorite God/Goddess? (Hades - Athena - Poseidon- Odin-ETC)

Let’s go through all of them shall we? (I’m an indecisive bitch so this is the best you’re getting)

Odin – I don’t know shit about him outside of the train wreak that was SoG. Pretty dope god, eventually found a female host which. HELL YEAH, YOU GO GIRL. His odin cloth thing is pretty boring, I don’t like the design, but he’s probably the god who did the least war crimes. Pretty chill dude

Poseidon – sea thot. Must I say more? 10000000/10 bless his foppish host. Boring though and doesn’t do much in the story other than want to go back to sleep which, yknow, mood.

Athena – I…. I don’t like her. Saori and Sasha I like but Athena, not so much. I don’t hate her, but I don’t like her. She did some really questionable things, she continues to do very questionable things, and she doesn’t fit the bill of a benevolent goddess. Also. Why are you just throwing your saints into battle mindlessly?! Aren’t you the goddess of strategy led warfare?! Make a fucking plan for once in your reincarnated life

Hades – Idk what to make of him. I think he’s chill enough that I can’t blame him for sticking a sword into seiya’s chest. I would’ve done that 100 chapters earlier. Hes not bad, he obviously cares for his spectres and he has a giant dog. But at the same time, I don’t know enough about him to make a concrete decision on where he stands on my like list

15: Why did you join the fandom?

I don’t know to be honest. I usually don’t have a reason why I join a particular fandom, I just do because I like the media. But for StS it’s a little weird since I knew about it since I was young. I guess I just wanted to push out some artwork that it did for the show and slowly got swallowed into the fandom ahaha

17: Saddest character death?

This is hard ahaha I usually don’t get sad over character death

Uhhhh I guess Io, especially since the scene leading up to his death was really well done. I was genuinely sad to see him go because you knew he was willing to sacrifice his life to protect what he believed in. it was just really unfortunate to see that his final sacrifice was a desperate attempt to push a camel through the eye of a needle

23: Moment that made you cry?

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Shion’s second death. The anime expanded on that scene so beautifully. The music especially during that scene tugged on my heartstrings slightly. I didn’t actually shed tears, its very rare that any piece of work can get me to shed genuine tears, but this one really punched me in the gut

34: If you could bring a character back to life, who would it be?

Ooooh I don’t know. I felt like all the characters died for a reason so I wouldn’t really bring anyone back

BUT, I do want to know more about the silver saints, Lacerta Misty in particular so I’d bring him back just so he can brag about how beautiful he is

41: Character you would give more Screen Time?

I’m cheating here and I know it but my very very predictable answer is The Marina. More specifically, Kasa, Io, Baian, and Krishna. God I wish those four would have gotten more screen time, it would have been amazing. I want to see the Marina as a family too. We get to see the Saints as a family, the Spectres as a family, even the Asgardians as a family, but the Marina are scattered all over the place during their arc and never really interact with each other. That’s such a waste of potential right there when you could have gotten so much good interaction out of these stupid idiots

44: More wasted character?

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LYUMANDAS KASA

His tactics and his ability were so cool and was so effective. He took out all the bronze saints damn it. He had so much potential to wreak havoc and destruction. He was probably intelligent enough to probably catch onto Kanon’s plan to betray the Marina and that was such a waste of potential. His design is also really unique, in a cast of pretty boys you have someone who isn’t conventionally beautiful but still kicks ass. I love his character to death honestly and I wish we could have seen and explored more of his character

45: NOTP?

I’m very flexible about shipping. I don’t mind age difference ships like Aiolos/Shura, I do enjoy some incest ships (Thanks pale for writing That One plant twins fic), and enemies to lovers trope is my lifeblood now so spectre/saint ships is something that I really like. I guess the one ship that I’m kinda iffy about is Kiki/Mu, but to those who ship it, more power to you.

50: After Saga’s death… who would you nominate to be the New Pope?

I knew you’d ask this lmao

I like to think that the pope seat stays vacant until the events of Omega, but if I had to choose someone to take the seat, I’d like Marin to done on that ridiculous robe. She’s proven to be righteous and follows faithfully under Athena while making her own decisions that sometimes challenges the boys to step out of their comfort zone. She’s taught people before, although how well is debatable, and she wouldn’t separate the future gemini saints since she’s already experienced what it feels like to be taken away from a sibling so no gemini drama for that generation. Also a female pope, hell yeah

Ask game questions can be found here

#ask meme #dorkish art #sketchy doodle #thanks for asking~~#kingofthewilds

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backtobackbakubabe · 4 years

Text

Baby its Cold Outside (PART 13)

Bakugo X Reader

It’s beginning to feel a lot like Christmas!

Words: 2122

PART 1 HERE, PART 2 HERE, PART 3 HERE PART 4 HERE PART 5 HERE , PART 6 HERE PART 7 HERE PART 8 HERE PART 9 HERE PART 10 HERE PART 11 HERE PART 12 HERE PART 13 HERE PART 14 HERE

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“OI dumbass! What are you doing? Let me help you with that!”

It was Christmas eve and you were just trying to organize the presents around the tree. Your baby bump was more like a baby basketball at this point. Only a few more weeks to go before the world had a new Bakugo. You groaned as you straightened up bracing your hands on your lower back. “Thanks babe... there’s only a few more. Your mom stopped by earlier today and dropped off a bunch of stuff. Like it took both of us like five trips to the car to get all of it unloaded. I’m assuming it’s mostly baby stuff.”

“Wouldn't surprise me if it was all baby stuff.” He helped you over to the couch. “The old hag won't shut up about the little guy.”

He organized the last of the presents before joining you on the couch. He pulled both of your feet into his lap and started to rub them. “She loves you and she's excited about having her first grandchild. I cant tell you how many times she's given me a speech about how you are too good for me and you’re the kid she’s always wanted and I cant screw this up.”

“Aw babe she loves you too you know. All she could do was talk about how cute you were as a baby and how exceptional you were. Said our kid was going to be amazing with my heart and the Bakugo genes. Naturally she did throw in a couple jabs about your attitude but she does love you..”

He leaned over and put his head in your lap, “She is right though... I dont deserve you. I’m thankful every day that you saw something in me and decided to give me a chance.”

“That is not true! Bakugo Katsuki you take that back right now! I am not too good for you! If anything you’re the one who's constantly taking care of me.”

He snuggled further into your lap, “I love you. So much. And I cant wait to spend the rest of my life with you.”

You giggled, “Katsuki if I didn't know better I would say that sounded like a proposal.”

“So what if it was?” He pushed himself up and into a kneeling position on the floor in front of you. With sure hands he pulled a small red box out of his jacket pocket. “Y/n... I’ve been carrying this stupid ring around for probably six months now. It’s not that I didn't want to ask you sooner... its just you know how stubborn I can be. And for some reason I had made up my mind that I was going to propose on Christmas. I know it’s your favorite holiday and I dont know, its probably stupid but I just wanted it to be special.” He opened the box to show off the most gorgeous ring you had ever seen.

“Y/n would you do me the honor of being my wi- Oi are you crying?”

You had tears streaming down your face, “You try having the love of your life propose to you with the most beautiful ring ever in existence while being eight and half months pregnant full of fucking hormones on fucking Christmas eve of all fucking nights! Of course I’m fucking crying!”

He just smiled, took the ring out of the box, and held it to your finger, “So is that a yes?”

You wiped your tears with the hand he wasnt holding, “Yes! Of fucking course!”

He slid the ring onto your finger before giving you a soft kiss. He cupped your damp cheeks in his hands, “Mrs. Bakugo... Has a nice ring to it.”

You chuckled, “Damn I thought I was going to be Mrs. Zero... Is it too late to change my answer?”

He squeezed your thigh, “I’m afraid us Bakugos don’t come with a return policy. So it looks like you’re stuck with me.”

“OH! Yuuto will be so happy! At least once a month he asks if you’ve proposed yet. He’s always saying his quirk keeps telling him its the only logical outcome and it was making him anxious that we weren't engaged yet. Every time I would tell him no he’d just say ‘Any day now would be nice.’”

Bakugo laughed resuming his place on the couch with arm draped around you, “Not much of a filter on that kid huh? Well I’m surprised he kept it a secret this long. I actually told him about this a month ago. He kept bugging me about it that one day I came to eat lunch with you and decided to hang out with the class the rest of the day. So eventually I told him so he’d calm down.”

“Sounds like Yuuto. Did I tell you he took down Aizawa in his final exam? Took him all of ten minutes. I tried to tell him how awesome he was and all he had to say was, ‘I have him memorized at this point, all logical outcomes led to me passing.’ The kid spent weeks prepping by watching every video of every teacher fighting. He knew every move before it even happened. He's something else.”

“I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again, he reminds me of Deku, except way smarter and honestly more tolerable. I love how blunt he is, even if he doesn't mean to be. He's honest and to the point and I can respect that.”

It was obvious how much Bakugo cared for Yuuto. He worked with him every now and then when he had free time. It made your heart soar with how patient he was with him. In a way they both lacked social skills but they both strived to be better versions of themselves. Sometimes you thought Bakugo took more away from their training sessions than Yuuto did. You wouldn't be surprised if when the time comes Ground Zero got a new side kick.

You flinched as the baby started kicking. It wasnt the first time but this time seemed to be bit harder than usual. You grabbed Katsuki's hand and placed it on your belly, “He’s kicking!”

With his hands on your belly and his forehead on you shoulder... this was what true happiness felt like. “Babe? How would you feel about a Christmas wedding?”

He turned to look at you, “I’d be fine with that. Would give us about a year to get everything figured out. The baby could be the ring barer, that’s be pretty fucking cute..”

“No... I mean like tomorrow. Fuck it. I dont need a fancy wedding. I just need you. We can renew our vows later if we want to, but I’m done waiting. I just want to be married.”

He gave you a wicked smile, “Look babe I know you're desperate to lock me down but I honestly think you’ll be a little upset later down the road if we did the bare minimum. So how about we compromise? You call our parents, I’ll call our friends. Tomorrow night we’ll have a small courthouse wedding with just us, followed by a dope ass after party with all our friends and family. How does that sound?”

You threw you arms around his neck, “You are so perfect! Oh my gosh!” You pulled back, “Shit what am I going to wear? Im huge! I won't fit into any of my nice dresses! No where will be open either! It’s Christmas eve!”

He sighed, “Okay just this once... I’ll pull the Ground Zero card. We can ask Sasha, the women who does all my hero costume alterations if she could have something put together by tomorrow morning. Let me make a call.”

Half an hour later you were sending over a few pictures of dresses you liked to Sasha. She said not to worry and she’d have a dress ready in no time. Shit this was happening. You were really getting married tomorrow.

*****************

You spun a few times in front of the mirror. You dont know how she did it but Sasha was really amazing. She came over a little after lunch and did last minute alterations and she somehow managed to make you look beautiful and not at all like an oversized marshmallow.

Mina came over and helped you with your hair and makeup. She, Kirishima and you and Bakugos parents were the only ones that would be at the actual ceremony. Momo, Denki, Dylan and cementoss were over at the UA gym decorating it for the after party. You had decided that that it was big enough and secure enough that you all could have a good time without worrying about paparazzi trying to sneak in. Katsuki had gone a bit overboard with the after party invites. Claiming he wanted everyone to see you were off limits. As if they hadn't known that already.

You felt like a total cliche with your shot gun wedding but honestly you didn't care. You were starting a family... starting a life with Katsuki. Its all you had ever wanted. So as you walked down that isle all you could do was beam your most endearing smile, and all Katsuki could do was return the gesture.

It was time for your vows. You knew Katsuki was nervous because he's not always the best with his words, or expressing his feeling for that matter but he surprised everyone in the room. “Y/n. A little over a year ago... One year, one month, and four days ago to be exact. You threw a snowball at my head. And shit are you lucky I was already so far gone over you already. That may have been the day we officially started dating but I fell in love with you years before that. I fell in love with you the day you pantsed me outside of UA with all of our future classmates watching and I’ve loved you every day since. Any girl who could be that pretty AND put up with my bullshit. Definitely a keeper. I may have had weird ways of showing it. And I’ll be the first to admit I was a dick from time to time. But you bring out the best in me and I cant imagine a life for me without you in it.”

You stuck your lip out, “Aww Katsuki that’s so sweet. Oh shit you're going to make me cry again.” He slid the wedding ring on your finger giving your hand a quick encouraging squeeze. You have no idea where or how he got wedding rings on such short notice but you weren't going to ask.

“Alright so I guess it’s my turn then. So we've obviously been friends for years now. But we've also been rivals for years as well. We always competed at UA in just about everything. We competed for better grades. We fought constantly, literally with our firsts just as much as we screamed at each other. Just the other day we tried to see who could fit more marshmallows in their mouth. But the only thing I've ever been better at than you was English. Which brings me to the only time you ever asked me for help... Your Oscar Wilde paper. It was in your dorm room that day that I truly fell in love with you because that was the first day I saw the kind, soft side of you that I’m so familiar with now. And like Oscar Wilde once said, ‘You dont love someone for their looks, or their clothes, or for their fancy car, but because they sing a song only you can hear.’ and baby you sing that song every day in the little things you do for me and I don't think it’ll ever get old.”

A single tear fell down his cheek which he was very quick to catch before anyone noticed. “You may now kiss the bride.”

And just like that you shared your first kiss as husband and wife.

Later you two were sitting at a table eating cupcakes at your after party. All of your friends dancing around you having a good time. You leaned over so he could hear you over the music, “I never knew you liked me all that time. I’m sorry it took me so long to catch up.”

He gave you a wicked smile, “I’m used to waiting on you by now. I’m just sorry you actually thought you were better at English than me... I never needed help on that Oscar Wilde paper... I just wanted an excuse to spend time with you.”

#bakugo x reader #bakugo x y/n #bakugo #bakugo katsuki #katsuki bakugō #bakugo imagine #bhna #bhna bakugou #bhna imagine #bhna x reader #mha bakugou #mha #mha imagines #mha x reader #my hero academia

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fangirlxwritesx67 · 4 years

Text

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May Be Home, Chapter 10 Word count this chapter: 1700 Catch up here: Chapter 1. Chapter 2. Chapter 3. Chapter 4.Chapter 5. Chapter 6. Chapter 7. Chapter 8. Chapter 9. Characters: au rockstar!Dean Winchester x OFC Sasha. Song: Sounds of Someday, Radio Company Music

Tags: 18+, sex, smut, lots and lots of m/f sex in different ways (fingering, oral, penetrative) in different places (bed, table, car, shower), no condoms ever, enthusiastic consent, Daddy kink, language, lots of alcohol, sexy eating, etc

Sasha saw Dean Winchester everywhere she looked.

She was reminded of him when she saw coffee, or whiskey, or a certain shade of dark red. She thought of him when she slipped on the bracelets he had purchased for her during their first weekend.

Every time she saw a picture of him, she was reminded of the way he smiled at her, the way he laughed, the way he looked in bed.

She had hoped to hear from him by now. She thought their last weekend together had been something special. At least she expected Rowena to summon her for another weekend with him. But that number never called her phone.

She told herself that Dean was busy, that it was the holidays, and he would ask for her again. But all she got was silence.

November passed, and December.

Sasha stopped playing Dean's albums because it hurt too much to hear his voice. She stopped looking at his Instagram because it hurt too much to see his face.

She couldn't entirely escape reminders of him, though. Sometimes she heard his music on the radio. Sometimes she saw bits of news or press about him.

Her coworkers at the restaurant all knew about her obsession with Dean, although they knew nothing about her weekends with him or about her broken heart.

Sometimes in the kitchen, if he came on the radio, they would tease her, "Sasha. It's your favorite. It's your boyfriend." She forced herself to listen, acting like she didn't care and pretending every word didn't wasn't a sharp jab to her heart.

Only once did she let a little bit of the truth slip. It was after work, and she was doing shots with Lee, the bartender.

"What's going on with you, Sash?" He teased her gently. "If I didn't know better, I'd say you had a broken heart, but you haven't even hooked up with any body since-" He stopped talking when he saw her eyes were full of tears.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Lee asked.

Sasha shook her head. "I can't," was all she said. Even drunk, she knew that she would sound ridiculous, telling some wild story about hooking up with a star she had a crush on.

Saying that she and Dean had actually gone on a date, that she had spent the night with him, that she thought they actually shared something special- that would sound even more unbelievable.

In that moment, Sasha hated Dean and hated herself. How had she thought it had meant anything? The greatest days of her life were probably a blur to him, a few hours with another girl whose name he had already forgotten.

Sasha dashed the tears off her cheeks and locked up her heart. If the things she had shared with Dean meant nothing to him, they would mean nothing to her. She kept telling herself that, over and over, hoping she would start to believe it.

The secret truth burned like a hot coal in her chest: she was in love with Dean. And she would never get to be with him again.

Sasha didn't answer her phone when she didn't recognize the number, and rarely checked her voicemail. So a few days passed between getting the call and getting the message. She was halfway listening in her car on her way to work.

Prescriptions, check. Pay phone bill, check. Then the sound of a familiar voice suddenly filled her ears.

"Sweetheart, it's me." Dean sounded ragged. "Just… call me. Text me. I don't care. Let me hear from you, please.”

Blinding tears hit Sasha so hard she had to pull over, her chest heaving with sobs.

Dean fucking Winchester, after everything he had put her through, he just wanted to call her like that? In the safety of her car, she pounded her fists against the steering wheel. She screamed where no one could hear her. She waited until her heart slowed a little.

She wanted, oh how she wanted, this to really be him. But so many weeks had gone by and she had never heard from him. Had he really called her? Was he missing her too? How could she be sure?

Her voice was too shaky to be trusted so she picked up the phone and texted How do I know it's you?

She waited, breathless, the phone trembling in her hand.

Oh, I don't know, baby girl Pancakes, coffee in bed Don't tease Daddy

His text replies sent a bolt of white hot longing straight from Sasha's heart to her core. Oh, how she wanted this to be true.

But she had to be sure that this was him, that he was serious, and this was not just some kind of cruel joke.

Everyone knows you like pancakes. Tell me more.

The texts came one after another;

Olive garden. My queen of hearts. Slow dancing in that blues bar.

It was Dean, it had to be.

Tell me something only you would know about me.

It took a moment but he wrote back.

You thought I wouldn't notice that you were crying when we had sex in the shower.

Sasha knew, then, that it was really Dean - her Dean. She took another moment to let tears roll down her cheeks. Then she drew in a deep breath.

Her heart was fluttering with tremulous hope. But she was scared, so scared. What had happened for all these months? What did Dean want, and why had it taken him so long to reach her?

Nice to finally hear from you.

She kept her reply short and cool, her thumbs spelling out something entirely different from what she was feeling.

But I have to go to work. I'll talk to you later.

Sasha hoped that her tables got what they wanted that night, because she wasn't sure what she was doing. She was so focused on the phone in her pocket, waiting for it to buzz, waiting for Dean to text her again.

And text her he did, so often that she was ducking behind the salad station and the drink machine and the walk in cooler just to peek at her phone.

Baby, please keep talking to me. You wouldn't believe what I've had to deal with. Sam and Rowena, they really fucked me over. But I missed you. Sasha, are you there?

After hearing nothing from Dean for weeks, Sasha couldn't handle this sudden communication overload. Between serving tables, she found a minute to respond.

I'll keep talking when I'm ready. I'm working right now. Give me some time.

Dean was silent the rest of Sasha's shift, and if he responded later, she didn't know, because she started drinking with Lee, and the kitchen crew.

Lee asked her, "You've been acting weird all night. Looking at your phone and smiling. Is this about- the heartbreaker?"

Sasha couldn't help it; she blushed.

"Who is this mystery man, who can break your heart and still put a smile on your face?" Lee joked. "Your favorite guy in the world, Dean Winchester?"

"Fuck Dean Winchester," Sasha answered. She choked back another shot. Then she rested her forehead against the wooden bar and sobbed.

Sasha woke up, not for the first time, in Lee's apartment. In the past he had given her the bed but now that he had a boyfriend, it made more sense for her to sleep on the couch.

She pulled on her shoes and slipped out, walking the few blocks back to her apartment. There, she plugged in her phone and fell into bed to sleep some more.

When she woke up later for her shift, Sasha checked her phone and saw another flood of messages.

Sasha, please I've missed you I didn't know But I missed you Fuck, baby girl, I missed you.

It was a lot, and Sasha wasn't sure how to answer. But she could admit one thing:

I've missed you too.

Something Dean said made her curious.

What didn't you know?

I didn't know you were still interested. Rowena and Sam told me you were done. That you refused to come and see me again.

Sasha was shocked. Did Dean really think that she wasn't interested? As if everything they shared had meant nothing to her?

How could you even think that was true?!

He wrote back:

I wanted to get in touch with you right away. I didn't have your number. They wouldn't give it to me.

She didn't believe him. The whole story seemed farfetched. Unsure what to think, what to say, she stopped answering.

Sasha tossed her phone on the bed in frustration. When it bounced onto the floor, she didn't pick it up. Instead, she rolled over and cried herself to sleep.

The first thing Sasha did the next morning was check her phone for anything from Dean. Nothing. She would've convinced herself she had dreamed it all except for the messages she already had. But Dean hadn't texted her back.

Sasha was exhausted before she ever started work. She went through the motions of waiting tables and hoped she was doing okay. She was distracted by checking her phone over and over for another word from Dean.

Nothing came, and Sasha grew increasingly irritated. Her shift was all but over when the hostess let Sasha know she had one more table, one who had asked for her specifically.

She walked out, unsuspecting, only to be confronted with the sight of Dean Winchester, sitting in a booth, waiting for her.

Chapter 11

SPN First Last and Always: @dawnie1988 @deanwanddamons @divadinag @flamencodiva @fookinghelljensensthighs @idreamofplaid @maddiepants@magssteenkamp @onethirstyunicorn @the-chocolate-moose @there-must-be-a-lock @tloveswriting

Dean Curious: @adoptdontshoppets @awesomesusiebstuff @deangirl7695 @deans-baby-momma @mrsjenniferwinchester @stoneyggirl@supersassyprobablysad @wayward-gypsy

#may be home #dean winchester fanfiction #actual rockstar jensen ackles #dean winchester x ofc #radio company music #fangirlxwritesx67

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amazingflyingdick · 4 years

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trouvaille.

WHO: Dick Grayson @amazingflyingdick & Slade Wilson @terminator-deathstroke ; mentions of Damian Wayne @sonofabct WHERE: A random alley WHEN: October 16th, 2020 WHAT: Dick waits for Slade when he sees his bike parked outside Rose and Joey’s apartment

SLADE: Slade hadn’t heard from Dick since the incident with NOVA. But then... he didn’t expect to. After what he had done, he knew Dick would be too moralistic to want him again. Why shouldn’t he be? It was who he was, he had claimed. Even if Slade knew him better. Knew him deeper. He would be lucky if he ever saw Dick again in any other capacity besides staring at him from the end of his own blade. Maybe this was what it took.

But this time... it hurt. Slade was surprised by that part. But then... maybe he wasn’t. After all, Dick had coaxed vulnerability from Slade. Honesty that had peeled off his thick hide to leave the underbelly exposed. He had known that it would be rented by claws Dick couldn’t help but swipe after what had happened, but he couldn’t slow the bleeding as well as he’d thought.

The strongest of his kids had always been his Rosie. His little girl who stared back at him in mirror image. His hair. His eye. His anger and his skills. She was always going to be like him and nothing he could have done would have stopped it. And right now he was grateful, because it meant there was someone with whom to have conversations of nearly monosyllabic sentences as he worked through what the fuck this strangeness was.

He had had a good amount to drink, which means he’d be drunk for maybe ten minutes before he had to start again. And the ‘drunk’ he was just just enough to numb the pain, not even dull him or make him act stupid. Might be nice to blackout, but his metabolism wasn’t having it. So he made his way down the road, intent on his bike concealed nearby.

DICK: The events at NOVA at everything that happened since left Dick feeling lost and confused. He was oddly quiet, unwilling to discuss what had happened at the facility aside from the lackluster explanation of the events he'd given to Steve. The thought of facing Bruce and telling him about that conversation was enough to make him nauseous. It wasn't something he wanted to relive, especially not with Bruce's emotionless stare and inscrutable expression. Maybe he wouldn't have said anything, but he wouldn't have to. Dick knew what he would have been thinking. For that reason, he was relieved Steve destroyed the surveillance.

But Bruce wasn't wrong. That was the hardest part. Everyone had been right all along when they told him that this was a bad idea. Now, he couldn't decide if he felt guilty for having done it or because he didn't regret doing it. The varying emotions left him bewildered and sick. He had no idea what to do and there wasn't anyone who would tell him. Well, there was, but he already knew what their answers would be. Maybe it was time for him to listen.

As the days passed, he felt worse, not better, and talked even less. He spent most of his time in his room just to avoid interaction. His brothers provided brief respite and provided silent support. He was grateful they weren’t intrusive in their efforts. Concerned stares were too much for him. He knew what they were all thinking. It was convoluted and messed up and he just wanted to stop dwelling on it. Unfortunately, without patrol, there was nothing to keep his mind occupied; Dick had nothing but time on his hands. When he hooked on Sasha's leash, he didn't have any intention to go anywhere in particular. He walked the usual route route, one that brought him around to Joey's place. He knew he shared the apartment with Rose and definitely knew better than to stop, but there was a familiar weight on his chest as he walked by, gently tugging on Sasha's leash so she wouldn't get too close. It wasn't until he made the turn down an alley, half-hidden by an overhang, that he caught sight of Slade's bike. No one else would have seen it, but Dick was trained to notice tucked away hiding places. After so many years spent tracking Slade, he'd practically made it a habit.

For a few seconds he just stood there, struggling against two juxtaposing voices in his head. Finally he sighed and sat on the curb next to it, winding Sasha's leash around his hand and gently pulling her to stand between his knees.

It was a while before he heard footsteps approaching. When he saw Slade turn the corner, his heart suddenly felt as if it were in his throat even though his voice was calm and quiet. "Hey."

SLADE: He hadn’t expected to hear Dick’s voice. Hadn’t expected to find him waiting at the bike. And further, it was as Dick, not Nightwing. Slade took a breath, hands disappearing into the pockets of his leather jacket. “You go out of your way to find me?” He asked. “Or am I meant to believe this is happenstance?”

Looking down at the dog, Slade reached out to touch her head. He wondered if she would smell Roscoe on him. He hadn’t meant to get a fucking dog. He hadn’t even wanted on. But then he had passed by a shelter proclaiming puppies and he had remember Dick’s fucking dog. Billy had mocked him for hours when he found out a Slade had come out with a dog only a little more than two months old. Fucking thing. If anything, Grant likes Roscoe, and then dog had warmed his bed for the past few days.

DICK: Dick studied Slade with a small frown, his gaze scrutinizing, but the question made him blink. He looked away, scraping the leash with his thumbnail idly. "Saw your bike," he finally said. Did it matter? He'd sat down and waited for him. He wanted to see him and maybe that was stupid. No, scratch that, it was definitely stupid.

Sasha was especially interested in sniffing Slade. Dick's grip on the leash loosened so she'd have more slack. All of the things he'd thought about saying once Slade showed up suddenly seemed insignificant or misplaced. "You've been drinking. You shouldn't drive." That probably ranked as one of the top five dumbest things he'd ever said, but it was the first thought that popped in his head that he knew he wouldn't regret.

SLADE: Slade dropped down to one knee to all Sasha to smell him—and Roscoe—as he listened to Dick. When he chastised him for alcohol, he raised a brow. “Who said I was drunk, Smokey Bear?” He asked. “Should I be sure to prevent fuckin’ forest fires, too?” He was hardly drunk anyway. Just enough. Though, not enough to be seeing his little bird.

“What do you want, Dick?” He asked him as he finally stopped petting Sasha and pushed back to his feet. His arms crossed over his broad chest. “I haven’t seen you in over a week. And you made it pretty clear what ground we stood on that night.”

DICK: The more Slade spoke, the more certain Dick felt that this had been a mistake. His grip on the leash tightened until it was cutting into the side of his palm. "Don't be an asshole." That he could stand there and talk to him normally, or even as if Dick had been the one to upend their lives, pissed him off.

"What do I want?" He didn't even know what to say to that. "Actually, come to think of it, pretty sure I left my favorite floss at your place." He stood up, coaxing Sasha back to his side. "Forget it," he added tersely, moving past him and toward the sidewalk. "I shouldn't be here."

SLADE: As Dick moved to pass him, Slade’s hand lifted to catch his bicep, tightening there. “Come on, kid,” he said quietly. His grip was tight but somehow gentle. “Either you hate me or you don’t. I can’t play the games.” He didn’t want to play the games. It was all too weird for him that he was even so fucked up about it as he was. But Dick was right there and Slade didn’t want him going anywhere. Maybe that was what was wrong with this picture, but here it was.

DICK: Dick stopped when Slade caught his arm. Startled, he looked up at him with a confused scowl. "I never said I hated you. I'm the one one playing games? Are you serious? You kept secrets from me. I walked in on a bloodbath, my entire family is in chaos now, and because I have the audacity to be upset about it, you think I'm playing games? Everything is fucked."

SLADE: “Why else would you wait by my bike, Dick? You hoping I’m going to apologize? I won’t. I sent a fucking message.” He shook his head, eye fierce. “I did what your family wouldn’t and retaliated. I’m protecting you.”

DICK: "I wasn't waiting by your bike looking to mess with your head. I don't do that." Dick snapped. "And I don't need your protection. I don't want your protection, because, full offense, you're terrible at protecting people. That’s why you left the first time, and look where that got us. Do you think this is any better?"

SLADE: “My protection comes with the package, Dick,” Slade said. “And don’t you think I noticed that I didn’t see you for ten fucking years and then I’m with you a few months and you got shot in the head. I’d laugh if it wasn’t so fucked up.” He shook his head, watching the other. “You need all the protection you can get. And you need to understand that I am Deathstroke. I love you, Grayson, but I’m never going to be one of your little fiancées or the fucking mutant.”

He paused, meeting Dick’s eyes for a moment before shaking his head. “You know what I am, and you chose me anyway.”

DICK: "It had nothing to do with you. If it were actually NOVA behind it, then it was for something I did." If anything, Slade being associated with him should have discouraged NOVA from doing what they did. Dick's eyes narrowed, and he scoffed angrily at the mention of his ex-fiancés and Josh. "Don't you think I know that? I'm not an idiot. I know what I chose and I know who I chose."

He paused, closing his eyes for a moment as he took a slow breath. "I don't want it to be like this. I don't." Some of the anger was fading quickly, even though he was trying to hold onto the resolve. "I wasn't expecting you to apologize," he finally whispered. "I just... I wanted to see you." The admission brought his attention straight back to the twisted feeling in his chest. "I miss you."

SLADE: Slade softened the moment Dick spoke those words. He missed Dick, too. Of course he did. How could he not when the pair of them would be so well suited and were when Dick didn’t have his head up Batman’s ass.

Reaching out, Slade caught Dick’s chin, tilting his face up. “I’ve been right here, little bird. Same spot I always am.”

DICK: Dick winced, holding his breath as he took a moment to respond. It was impossible to hide how devastated he felt and he shook his head, his eyes clouded over. "No, you haven't been. You left. Then you kept secrets. I’m the one who stayed and adapted to you, because I wanted you so badly that I was willing to give some things up. Marriage. A family. I even..." He trailed. His throat felt tight. "I've even thought about giving up Nightwing. And maybe it was naïve to think that you'd do the same. But I'm just supposed to accept that you're Deathstroke and Deathstroke does things like this, isn't that right? I know better than anyone what Deathstroke does, so I'm pretty sure I belong in a cell in Arkham right next to him. I can't keep bending to this without losing everything, including myself. I need something from you, even if it's just meeting me in the middle, or I need to walk away."

It was the first time he'd asserted himself or outright asked Slade for anything. Part of him had been walking on eggshells until now, out of fear that he'd run him off, but at this point he had nothing to lose. "So what’s it going to be?"

SLADE: "I didn't ask you to give up Nightwing, Dick." And he never would. As for Marriage and a family... Slade didn't honestly think that Dick wanted those things. If he wanted them, he'd have them. He could have married any of the three women on whose finger he put a ring. Slade was out of the picture for the most part at that point. If he'd wanted babies, he'd have them. He had all but cut his jobs completely when Dick had asked him to, but he was never going to sit idly by and not work at all. Still... He was in love with Dick. And it stood to reason that Dick would ask something of him. He didn't want to destroy everything in Dick's life so he could change nothing.

"What'd your ideal?" He asked. "If I give you the parameters of: I'm not going to stop working, what would you ask me for?" Because he had kept jobs out of Star City, just as Dick had asked him to do. He wasn't completely incapable of change. He just needed to know what they were talking about. "I wouldn't change anything about you, Dick," he added. "So you don't have to stop being Nightwing. That's your job."

DICK: "I know." Slade hadn't asked him to give up anything. It didn't mean that being with him meant he wouldn't be required to make sacrifices, at least if he wanted to maintain his sanity, and Dick wasn't resentful about the choices he’d made. What held him back from committing to Kory and Babs had everything to do with the fact that part of him hadn't moved on. He had loved both of them, he would never deny that, but he'd never been able to give himself over fully, no matter how badly he'd wanted to.

It sent a wave of guilt through him when Slade pointed out that he wouldn't change him. Was that what he was doing? Maybe it was wrong, all of it, because suddenly it didn't seem fair. Dick never considered that he could be challenging who he was by asking him to change his method. Was that a fundamental part of him? He always believed that Slade did what he did because he wanted the money, not because he believed in it, and he didn't want Slade to change his belief system or values - even if his own were the complete opposite. Was that how he would interpret it? "I wouldn't ask you to give up Deathstroke. Just that you target real criminals, people committing injustices or considered evil. If I asked you to do that, will you think that's what I'm doing? Asking you to change who you are? Because I won't do that." Rejecting how Slade operated was one thing, but he wasn't comfortable if it came off to Slade that he was rejecting him.

SLADE: Slade looked at Dick. He thought that was complicated. It wasn't necessarily unfair... were Slade a moral person. He wasn't. Or rather... his morals were not the same as others. But he hadn't mentioned that he wouldn't change Dick as an attack. He just meant it on its own. Separate from Deathstroke. He had meant it as an argument not to have him drop Nightwing for seemingly no reason--to Slade, at least. He didn't care where his money came from as long as it came. It wasn't that he had an aversion to not killing random people. It just... was never that simple. "You want me to be like your brother," he said simply. "Trouble is... I don't have Wayne's standards. When you start trying to decide who lives and who dies based on who's "good", aren't you just playing God at that point? Not that I'm a pious man, but you're trusting my morality, Dick?"

It was a legitimate question. Who the fuck was supposed to vet his jobs for him when he and billy had been doing this all so long that it was basically like asking two death row inmates who was good and evil. The black and white of it all was just as hypocritical to him as taking a stand against order. People with those kinds of stances confused him. Slade had never claimed to have the authority to choose one or the other. It was all just down to who he, personally, would accept as a contract.

"This is all stemming off of blowing out NOVA," he continued, admittedly confused as to what he was supposed to be. "Are they not "evil'? What's your point of comparison? Am I evil?"

DICK: It wasn't that Dick agreed with what Jason did, because he didn't, but he could reconcile with it. He didn't have to stretch to compromise to it. When they did work together, Jason didn't kill people. He respected Dick's morals enough to put that aside, at least temporarily, although some deadly force had been used against the Bratva when they’d fought inside the jail. "I don't know that there is a God," he said quietly, shrugging his shoulders. "But taking someone’s life is always playing God, whether it's for money or morals. At least the second is more justified in its reasoning. Sometimes you're taking a life to save a life." Was it something Dick agreed with? Of course not.

"You're not evil," he said quietly, his expression troubled. "But that doesn't mean you don't do evil things." That wasn't something he was going to absolve him of. "Some agents are, yeah, but was every person you cut down in that building evil? No, I don't think so." He'd worked there. Undercover, sure, but long enough to see that not all of the employees were there with nefarious intentions. The receptionist, for one. She just answered phones and collected a paycheck. There was no such thing as evil by association. People had their reasons.

"I don't know what your definitions are, Slade," he said quietly. "It's subjective, isn't it? Maybe it isn't who you target that makes the difference, but why you made the choice. You were protecting me." He paused. "But what did the college intern who fetched coffee do to me? Nothing."

SLADE: "There isn't. Or if there is, He just hangs out in the sky." The only gods he knew about for sure were the Norse and the Olympians. He'd seen the former here in Star City and he'd met the latter on a mission. "But the concept remains." He shook his head. He didn't agree that morals and money were different, because they were both arbitrary to him. Money, at least, got him more luxury. More things to continue his skills. But there was no point picking apart everything Dick said, and he didn't want to be unnecessarily combative.

He shook his head. "Evil by your standards," he responded. "Pragmatic by others, and useful by still others." He wondered when Dick, and by extension Bruce Wayne, had decided that they knew better than everyone else in the world. "Nazis are still Nazis even if they were 'just following orders', aren't they? Someone in that group made the call to have you shot, someone else picked the team, still someone else outfitted them, and then someone drove the truck. Talking, choosing names from a page, building something, and driving. All seemingly innocuous. And yet every action ended with you almost dying. It's that simple to me, Dick."

There was no world in which he was going to feel sorry for any person in that building. If there were, he wouldn't have done it. He loved Dick, and he had done it for him in spite of knowing it might destroy them. It was done. And he'd do it again if it were necessary. "It wasn't a job for me. And if it had been dealt with sooner by the pacifists in your group, we wouldn't have needed to do it. But even Damian agreed that there's been a lot of sitting around while people are getting snatched. I don't care about them. Not really." He was just being honest. "But I do care about you. Have this whole time."

DICK: "If there's no God, then the concept is meaningless." Regardless, Dick never felt as if he had the right to take a life. It wasn't for him to judge. Jason made those calls. He didn't feel comfortable outlining the circumstances for Slade, because that made him responsible for the choices he would ultimately make. He would trust him to be logical about it and not kill someone for running a red light. And he wanted to trust that he wouldn't focus on finding loopholes in Dick's request.

He sighed heavily. There were obviously arguments to make on both sides. That was the whole point. Evil was subjective and he wasn't trying to reach an agreement on the definition of it. "I'm not making the standards. It's for you to judge, not me. I'm not telling you who to kill and who not to kill. You've operated like this before, it's not a completely unfathomable concept to you, and I don't expect us to always agree. But I'm not going to be hovering over your shoulder. I understand why you did what you did, I do, even if I don't agree with it. I just wish you hadn't involved my family. I know Damian makes his own choices, but... that can't happen again, Slade. It can't. And you can't keep things from me, either. That's the same as lying." That was exactly why he hadn't expected a move like that from Slade. He hadn't believed he would seek vengeance for his sake. Why should he? NOVA as an agency was far-reaching. They didn't know for sure who was involved in his shooting, even though he knew Tim was close to an answer. "I know," he finally said softly, stepping back and leaning against the brick. His arms were crossed tightly over his chest. At this point he was reading Slade's response as an unequivocal no, because he definitely hadn't said yes. Sasha made a whining nose and stuck her nose against his knee, but Dick's gaze stayed focused on the sidewalk. "So now that this is... done, does this mean our original agreement is off? Are you going to to be taking hits in the city?"

SLADE: "You'll have to speak to Damian about that. Though he would do well with me. If any of you would let him live to his potential, I could help him a great deal." He didn't even to postulate it. He knew that was true. However, he shook his head. "But I don't care if I train him or not. Though I'm better that Jason. Even if he'd throw a fit about it, I'm better than he is. I could train him better." He shrugged. "Plus... I knew his mother. Know what he'd be best at." But they'd never let him be what he needed to be. So it was moot anyway. It was a fucking waste.

He shook his head. "I haven't taken a single job since I promised you I wouldn't," he said. "I gave you my word." Dick should know what that meant to him. "NOVA wasn't a fucking job. They had it coming. Even if death means nothing here anyway." He shook his head. Slade didn't know how to live his life based on Dick's arbitrary standards, but he guessed he was going to have to try. He'd never done that before--lived for someone else. It was his problem in his fatherhood and his time as a husband. He had lived by his own code. It was what defined him. Now he was going to choose Dick over his own instincts. He just hoped it didn't bite him in the ass.

Shrugging, he ran a hand over his face. "Any other conditions?" He asked. "Get 'em while they're hot." He was a brusque person by nature, and he was going to have to take some time to adjust to this. To figure out what the fuck he was going to do with it. But this fucking kid... He loved this fucking kid. He'd just nuked a government agency for him, for all the lack of appreciation it earned him. He was obviously choosing whatever path he had to.

DICK: "If that's what Damian wants, then..." Dick trailed, shrugging. He couldn't do anything if Damian chose a different future for himself. "I want him to make his own way, his own decisions, but it has to be his choice. Just his. Don't act like you encouraging him to take the complete opposite path is any better. He should be able choose for himself." As upsetting as he was, he didn't want Damian to live the way he did. Every decision Dick made was filtered through a lens of what Bruce would think about it. As often as he tried to be his own person, break away from Batman's strict code of morality, sometimes the guilt in doing so was crushing. He was still trying to understand himself. Maybe Damian was struggling too. His goal had been to give him an idea of what Robin was like. So Dick might have taught him different morals, but at the end of the day, it was Damian who got to decide what type of man he wanted to be.

Frowning, he shook his head. He was about to explain what he meant, that Slade wouldn't be bound to keeping his word if they weren't continuing whatever it was they were, but he couldn't bring himself to actually say the words aloud. Watching him walk away had been difficult enough. Dick hadn't said goodbye then, even though he'd been furious, and he dreaded having to say it at all. Something told him that it wouldn't be easy.

He was pondering the conundrum when he heard Slade’s question. Startled, he looked up at him quickly, his brow furrowing. "...Really?" The relief in his expression was clear, even if part of him knew it might make him a bit naïve, and he hoped Slade wouldn’t come to resent him for this. "Um..." Dick pretended to think about it. "One more thing, super important - you let me store Lucky Charms at your house."

SLADE: “That’s just it, Dick,” he responded. “I didn’t encourage anything. All I did was point out that he looked angry. That I was going to do something about it. He wanted in.” There was this perception that he had somehow coerced the youngest. Were they all so blind to the fact that Damian wasn’t the boy they thought he was? Maybe they just found it more palatable that way.

“I already said I was in this, before. I’m not going back on it now. No use when you get me all irrational.”

As he asked about the cereal, Slade paused. “You’re really pushing with that fuckin candy food, Dick.”

DICK: Dick hated the sinking feeling that gave him. It came as little surprise to hear it from Slade, but it was confirmation of something he’d already suspected. He was an idealist, but he was far from stupid. “I know.” He sighed and ran his hand through his hair, his shoulders slumping. “He did a lot on his own. Before this.” And that had been during their time in Alaska. That wasn’t something he could put on Slade, or even wanted to.

The teasing smirk was quickly replaced with a look of innocent disappointment. “No? I could give you another week to think about it.”

SLADE: "He's an Al Ghul," he said with a shrug. As if that explained it. As if there was nothing more to say. Because to Slade, there wasn't. They had been ruining that kid for ages now. "He's always going to be one."

Furrowing a brow, he gave a snort. "The cereal's the breaking point?" he asked. "What a strong foundation we have."

DICK: “That doesn’t mean it’s all he’s good at,” Dick insisted stubbornly, unwilling to believe that someone could ever be fated to such things just because of blood. “He’s just as much a Wayne.” Even as he said it, he wasn’t sure it was much better. It wasn’t as if he would ever want Damian to be Bruce.

Laughing, he gave a slow shrug. “I have priorities.” Some of the tension in his body was fading the longer they stayed standing there, talking, because it meant Slade wanted this badly enough to still be there. At the very least, he wanted to try.

SLADE: "Maybe. But it's not what he gravitates toward. All kids have something they're good at." He shook his head. "Maybe this is what Damian is good at. You can't keep forcing it." Lifting a shoulder, he added, "My daughter wanted to be me. She screamed about not wanting to live in my shadow and then wore my outfit, cut out her eye, learned my fighting style. Even after I had pushed her to you for the final time after Titans East, she still wanted to be like me. No matter how much I beat her up or screamed at her, she was who she was going to be." Kids just did that.

"Like diabetes?" He asked wryly. "You're not a metahuman. What happens when your metabolism slows down, you little menace?" It was easier to make jokes now that he thought Dick might actually want to see him again, though he would have figured out how to make them regardless.

DICK: "I'm not forcing it," Dick said tiredly. He didn't want to force Damian to do anything. All he ever wanted was to give him options. For years he'd been told that he couldn't be anything else but a killer. If this were going to be Damian's path, then he wanted him to choose it because he wanted to do it, not because he thought he wasn't good enough for anything else. That was the difference. "I told you, it's his choice. Rose is doing her own thing now, too, isn't she? She didn't follow in your footsteps." Not completely. From what he'd heard, Rose’s methods sounded similar to Jason’s.

He laughed, unconcerned. "At least I can enjoy the time I have left. Age gracefully into my midlife crisis." Slade's metabolism made it impossible for him to stay drunk, Dick knew that from experience, so he knew it was safe for him to drive home now. It was likely fine at the start of their conversation, too, but it was better to be safe than sorry. "Didn't mean to hold you up."

SLADE: "You didn't," he said simply, reaching out to catch Dick's chin and lift it so he could meet his eyes. "But are we done here? Or are you going to text me tonight?" What did this little foray mean? He didn't care to dwell on Damian or Rose right now. This was about him and Dick. He had anticipated that the other would leave him. Was he right? Or was this going to actually blow over? Would Dick always resent him for what he had done? Did that matter to Slade?

DICK: Dick looked up at Slade silently for a few seconds, thoughtful, but then he smiled. "Keep your phone on you. You might get lucky." It was hard not to kiss him, because he wanted to, but he knew he'd get caught up in it if he did. Later he planned on stopping to the manor to check on Damian; the last thing he wanted to do was get sidetracked.

SLADE: Slade bit his lip as he watched the other. He was thinking the same thing as he watched the other. He took a step closer, opening the invitation. If Dick wanted to take it, he'd let him. If he didn't, then Slade would get it, even if he mentioned that he should keep his phone. There was still some uncertainty. Who knew what was going on in Dick's head?

DICK: It was instinctive for Dick to move forward at the same time, meeting him, and one of his hands lifted to the front of Slade’s arm. There was a brief pause after Dick leaned up while he studied him, silent, and then he turned his head and pressed his lips against Slade’s cheek. It would have been an innocent gesture if he hadn't lingered. The smile was back by the time he pulled away. Dick stepped back, wrapping the leash more around his hand. "See you soon," he said with a wink, and whistled for Sasha.

SLADE: Slade's hand barely had time to go for Dick's waist before he had pulled back. That was a tease if he had ever seen one. Or maybe it was a promise. He wasn't sure. However, Slade would admit that Dick had managed to surprise him again. After that run-in at the NOVA headquarters, he had been certain he would never see Dick again. He shook his head. "I'm going to get you for that, little bird," he told him gently, but ultimately let him go.

DICK: "Maybe you will, maybe you won't," Dick teased, flashing Slade a grin as he led his dog out of the alley. There were some things he had to do that night, not least of all go to the manor and process what he'd talked about with Slade. He couldn't ignore that this set them back, but it made it no less true that he'd missed him.

#slade/dick #c: terminator-deathstroke #c: discord #dick grayson #slade wilson

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artificialqueens · 4 years

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some call it chemistry — (trinity/detox) - lily2

[ prompt ] : sasha notices someone glancing at her best friend during their friend's performance and decides to try and make magic happen even if trinity isn't feeling the gesture too much: atleast at first.

[ author's note ] : I've been writing trinity a ton lately because she's one of my favorite queens and I will always love a florida girl with bias and I mentioned on my tumblr if there's any good pairings and someone mentioned detox and trinity would be just a match in plastic heaven and couldn't stop thinking about it so here this is, song below helps to set the mood and was mentioned, couldn't help myself! I reccomend highly listening to "two to make it right" by seduction for purposes of the fic, it's mentioned throughout the fic.

— *.✧

Sasha isn't stupid.

It was an odd first thought to have when considering what may or might not come of her possible intervention, it was difficult to not be atleast a tiny bit intruiged when she noticed a seemingly familar face in the crowd staring and glancing over at her best friend for the entire chunk of the night.

She knew first hand how the Russian herself sometimes be a bit oblivious, Shea always made fun of her once they fully begun to date of how she would consistently drop hints to the blonde, how every move in the game was to impress Sasha, make her smile, finally let her figure out that indeed Shea Couleé, likely the most wanted girl in all of Chicago, Illinois hell— America, was in love with the sweet, quirky, vocal girl who called Brooklyn home and Russia the motherland.

"She's been staring at Trinity all night." She whispered in a hushed tone to her girlfriend who was dancing around in her heels, as if someone would sniff their conversation out over Peppermint performing and giving her soul on stage, as she did always, Shea turned a bit concerned, "Who? If it's someone you think might pose a threat." Her words quickly gaining momentum beginning to scan the expression in Sasha's face before she quickly snickered, kissing her hand, attempting to divert any possible violence.

"No, no! I mean Detox, she's been giving her the side eye and the little glances all night, Trinity is comply distracted by the alcohol and performance obviously but, something in me says to maybe, try and set them up?"

Shea definitely felt her curiousity get the best of her as she took a sip of her vodka soda, her feet still moving along the floor as she took a glance at Trinity who was dancing wildly with Monét just across from them, she seemed just a bit tipsy but she was a southern girl: she could definitely handle her hard liqour especially if it meant seeing one of her best friend's perform on stage despite her meager dancing ability.

Her eye's peaked over at Detox who leaned against the bar, sipping a gin and tonic and occasionally speaking in uninterested, mumbled conversation to Alaska who already seemed drunk as can be, slugging against her shoulder, on the bar stool attempting to not break it with her stiletto's. A small grin across her lips forming when she indeed, looked back to Trinity who was lipsynching to the performance, staying on her feet, Shea surprised she could even move let alone attempt "dancing" in her skin tight dress, the lights reflecting on the iridescent fabric and material.

"Babe, I think you're on to something here." Her brow cocked in surprise as she pressed their lips together, Sasha very happy to receive a kiss before she pushed the blonde along to play matchmaker since she was the one who was doing some spying and cracked the code.

Casually walking through the crowd, stopping to greet and press some cheek kisses to Aja, Farrah and then bumping into a clearly drunk Katya, toppling onto Sasha in comfort: she attempted to make some idle conversation, Sasha unable to keep herself from just walking right past the constant pressure of conversing. Her Russian counterpart smiled before chugging her straight vodka as she grooved, taking Sasha's hands, "I know we both have really cute girlfriends but you'll always be my favorite!" She yelled over the music as they moved in a awkwardly endearing waltz position, Sasha giggling, not wanting to be rude or too obvious with the fact she was on a bit of a time crunch.

Eastern Europeans don't usually get this intoxicated so quickly.

Trixie seemed to come in at just the perfect moment, apologizing for Katya's state though Sasha truthfully didn't mind, she just had a mission and knew she would kick herself if she didn't get it done tonight.

"Hello!" Trinity yelped, hugging her best friend the minute she started barely walking in the same direction as the duo who were making an attempt to dance across the packed floor of the bar, New York City was crowded and Sasha knew it well enough that it didn't bother her too badly, Monét smiled and welcomed Sasha into their corner of the floor.

"Oh don't worry, I'm not dancing!" She yelled, Trinity frowning in disappointment, "Bitch I ain't drunk, I've had only two, Shea doesn't have to worry about me licking your face or any of the weird shit Alaska does." Monét cackled, remembering how much anger leaked from Trixie's face last week when Alaska decided to take out all her sadness through alcohol which ended up with Katya and Alaska comfortably at a distance performing with eachother until the idiosyncratic girl decided to lick Katya's cheek right on stage.

It was a loud uproar and reaction from an already intoxicated crowd, just laughter, screams and smiles though Monét mentioned that she had never seen such a visual representation of smoke blowing from the fumes quite like Trixie's reaction.

"Speaking of Alaska—" an almost perfect segway of events, "I've been with Shea the whole night of course but, I've noticed you definitely have sometimes attention the whole night." She said near her ear, Trinity stopping to dance as Monét kept singing, though her ears pricked open, "Oh girl if it's Alaska, I wouldn't trust her with anyone drunk."

Trinity had to agree, finishing off her drink with a slow chug, "Jesus, am I so ugly people only find me attractive when I'm drunk!" She cried out more in exaggerated pitch than genuine concern. Sasha shook her head, Trinity always looked stunning and utterly beat for the god's, a perfect understanding of makeup and clothing coordination.

"Alaska's best friend over there though..." She smirked, Trinity tilting her head, definitely pondering who exactly she meant by that though Sasha alertly pointed to Detox under her chin, immediately all sense of respect and normality seemed to drop as her cheeks flushed a bright red, grabbing Sasha's wrist.

"You're kidding right?"

Sasha's silent pose and the grin that begun to stretch across the corner of her lips was enough of an answer. "Shit..." She gasped before handing Monét her empty drinking glass, "I'm gonna go real quick." The Floridian huffed out as her friend groaned aloud, "I knew she'd leave my crusty ass the minute she finds someone who can possibly buy her more alcohol."

"Would you like a dance?" The black girl smiled genuine as she held out a hand, dramatically painted like a victorian gentleman, Sasha couldn't help but cross her arms at the thought of it, she knew how jealous and tense her own lover could get, "Hey! I know Shea and have for decades, I am definitely not trying to get you, I could never do that to Nina." She explained innocently, harmlessly, waving to Shea who kept a good but resentful distance.

Shea already giving her massive side eye, pointing at her and making gestures towards her throat at Monét bitterly, she knew her NYC sister was simply playing around and absolutely trusted Sasha's intuition however she couldn't help but feel a twine of jealously as if her and Sasha hadn't danced for the last two hours with arms only around eachother.

"We can dance but no licking my face."

"Consider it done bitch!"

*.✧

Leaving her friend's for themselves, Trinity pushed her way through best she could, unable to really process this all and convinced this was some kind of set up or joke Shea had for Sasha to simply deliever the punchline. It wasn't that she didn't feel like she was good enough or pretty enough, Trinity had the wallowing self confidence others wish they could chanel even 2% into, that wasn't the concern.

But Detox, it definitely seemed just a bit out of her league.

They weren't that much older than eachother, Trinity was younger by a year it was more that she was completely smitten hearing about her almost a year ago, entranced by the idea that someone loved plastic surgery as much as her finding that an impossible feat and then only meeting her through Alaska about six months ago where it was revealed the "Queen of Southern California" was actually born in Orlando, just as Trinity was.

"It's Trinity!" Screamed Alaska in excitement as Detox turned, taking a sharp breath in to appear as calm and sedated compared to her best friend as possible, "Yes it is! You gotta slow your roll girl." She mumbled comfortingly, rubbing her shoulders as she waved her off, "As long as she's driving me home, we're all good!" A finger in front of Detox's nose, quickly getting deflected with a scoff.

"Can't believe I gave up alcohol for you, fucking bitch."

Turning to Trinity she smiled, beginning to piece together that it was probably the doing of Monet or Sasha judging by their time together and proximity to eachother, she definitely wasn't disappointed, she just had hoped this could've happened without Alaska needing to breathe on her neck, literally and figuratively.

"Sorry about her, I have to be her damn sitter for the night since Roxxy is off in Orlando tonight without me."

"If you buy me some alcohol, I'll definitely forgive you." A wink leaving the corner of her right eye as Detox sprung into action, truly making an attempt to seem convincingly flirty back without making it cheesy or dense. "Pick your poision, I know everyone who works here so if they make it bad, I can complain like the bitch I am." Gaining a laugh from Trinity she couldn't help but smile, tuning out Alaska who also begged for alcohol.

"Suprise me." She breathed out gently, their eyes gazing though the moment always seemed to be ruined by the blonde's tantrums, Trinity wasn't offended, she couldn't count the number of times Sasha had probably carried her out a bar or three after a good night out.

"Manhattan please and a water if possible." She spoke as she handed the bartender a twenty, asking for no change as she invited Trinity to sit with her, the girl smiling and pulling out the chair so she could sit, watching her dress as she hopped up on the bar stool, the two exchanging awkwardly endearing glances. The energy extremely tense but the expressions clearly expressing nothing but need and want.

"So, I have to be a nosy bitch—" she started as she handed Trinity her drink, "Was it your friend who sent you over?" Referring to Sasha, she seemed sweet enough but wasn't sure if this interaction was going to be horrid or something worth taking up further.

"Yes, she mentioned you stared at me all night." A sip from her drink, an approving nod to the alcoholic beverage. Detox was a bit taken back by her honest response, Alaska beginning to doze out on her back, locking their hands so she could be sure she didn't let her be taken off by a stranger.

"Did she?"

"Yup, I didn't believe her hence why I came, I thought it was too good to be true is all." Honesty was truly the best policy when it came to Trinity, why try and beat around the bush when you could just get to the point, make out, buy some alcohol and go home happy or atleast mildly satisfied for the night.

A roll of the eyes from Detox, who ran a hand through her blonde hair as Trinity grabbed her free hand, "I expected more confidence from someone who can't even pinch herself." She had to laugh wildly at that, "Oh fuck off!" She screamed, hitting her shoulder teasingly.

"You're one to talk."

"Bitch atleast I am, I've never seen you so quiet, you're always making some snide or witty comment."

She couldn't argue with that, she never felt so much riddled anxiety trying to speak to someone like Trinity, even when they had first meet it seemed like some twist of fate, too good to be true.

Hilarious, stunning, a bit blunt but always honest and caring of her friends, full of silicone and always had a comeback in the palm of her hands ready and prepared.

"Dance?" Already finished with her Manhattan, Trinity stood and held her open hands out for Detox to take, the blonde nervously glancing back and forth at Alaska who was begining to get drowsy. "Don't worry about her, bring her with us and we can drop her with Sasha, you know her motherly insticts."

"Perfect." She laughed, taking her hand as she grabbed onto Alaska's shoulder who was dancing along to the tune, the music dying out in Detox's ear as Trinity lead her to the left of the floor, handing Alaska to Sasha with no words exchanged expect a nod, now they were alone to dance as the music set in, a new song starting.

"Jesus christ, this is a throw back." Detox laughed as she was still holding onto Trinity's hand, not wanting to let go though she danced along to the beat, the brunette impressed, "See you can dance!" Detox shrugged, sliding across the floor in her heels easily, she could pick up movements but didn't consider herself a dancer, Trinity she knew had two left feet unless she was about to pass out from alcohol poisoning or was grinding on someone.

❝ From the start its plain to see

you're suffering from a serious broken heart,

You know that its a shame

But I'm here to ease your pain. ❞

The music perfectly moved in as she took Trinity's waist, the other girl nervously inching away, "Trust me, trust me." She whispered before moving the hair from her forehead, "Trust the dancer who bought you a very overpriced cocktail." She couldn't argue with that logic.

❝ Do you know that

It takes two to make a thing go right

It takes two to make it out of sight

I can see it in your eyes

You feel the same way I feel about you. ❞

Feeling the rhythm of the music, singing loudly and feeling Trinity singing along to, she grabbed her hands and led her in a four corner movement, assuring she was doing just fine though Detox's added body rolls only made Trinity tense up twice as hard, unable to match her energy or refined skill, no matter how badly she claimed she couldn't pick up dancing.

❝ Some call it chemistry

I call it you should be with me

Cause I know together we can really turn this mother out. ❞

"You're really good at this!"

Detox had to amusingly snicker, "I'll send my thanks to Roxxy and Mayhem, taught me everything I need to know I guess." Relaxing her muscles Trinity felt herself slowly open up a bit more, everyone already looked a fool or was so adjusted to alcohol that they couldn't care how ridiculous she would look.

❝ In my mind there is no doubt

That one & one equals me & you

Don't you know that it takes two

Two to make it right. ❞

Trinity took it upon herself to turn around and shake her hair before running a hand down her dress and gently grinding on her partner's waist, recluctent at first before Detox wrapped her hands from behind around her neck, clearly approving.

She turned and threw her arms around her neck in return, staring intensely into her own eyes and mouthing every single word of the song as if she was Michelle Visage herself, though it was definitely a classic but the music absolutely gave her a new energy considering the lyrics and every new and horny ambition she felt running through her body. She owed Sasha as much money as she wanted after this.

❝ I don't believe in fairy tales

But I believe some things were meant to be

Why should we be alone

When we could have each others arms to hold. ❞

Their fingertips lingered on eachother's waist though Trinity was definitely the braver one from the duo, spinning her partner around with a quick speed before holding her with confidence, "Hope I won't make your friend's jealous." She said referring to Alaska and Roxxy, blowing Alaska a kiss as she jumped for joy seeing her two friend's dancing together.

The three always stuck around eachother since childhood she mentioned when they first met though she never knew the extent of their friendship.

"Oh trust me, they know me well enough to know who I've been pining for the last six months."

"Really? Who."

She needed to hear it first hand and know tonight wasn't just a waste of her time and Detox's, there was no way she had just grinded on the girl for no damn reason, the blonde bit the inside of her cheek, responding with a firm, "It's hard to say when she's dancing so sweetly in front of me." The god awful scent of hard liqour and cheap perfume dying down when Trinity learned into her face, wishing she would just knock her into a wall and kiss her already, time was a wasting until she had to go back to California, though she always made time for New York City.

"You're a real flirt, I like that."

"And I've been staring at you all night praying you'd kiss me so I guess we're even."

Detox didn't want to say she felt three entire weights drop off her shoulder when Trinity planted her lips on hers but it was difficult to say otherwise. Her red lipstick unintentionally brushing onto Detox's brightly colored pink lipstick though she wouldn't bitch about it, hell how could she. "Thank God for Sasha being nosy." She breathed out before slamming their lips together again, her hands toying with her hair, completely intoxicated forgetting she even had alcohol.

When she was pulled away after a solid minute she couldn't understand why, though they had kissed on that dance floor for about two minutes, having no boundaries now, every wall crushed down and thrown into the abyss. Her head leaned into the crook of Detox's neck since with heels she was still taller as she was without them, humming the song to herself with their hands dropped at eachother's hips.

"You wanna ditch?"

She had expected the question to come sooner or later, she loved her friends but if she could score especially score with someone who also showed a genuine interest in her, she would yank her own ass out of that bar and sprint in her white heels if she had to.

"Come to my hotel with me, if I can kiss you all night I don't want it to be in a gay bar playing Seduction, no offense." Her face changing to a gentle rose pink across her cheeks as a permanent smile was drawn on her face, Trinity could only nod and tighten her grip, interlocking their hands.

"None taken, just promise me you'll turn a blind eye if I steal that lipstick shade you're wearing right now."

"Consider it a done deal."

#rpdr fanfiction #trinity taylor #sasha velour #shea coulee #monet x change #katya zamolodchikova #trixie mattel #alaska thunderfuck #detox x trinity #sashea #trixya #lesbian au #concrit welcome #roza #detox icunt

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minuky · 5 years

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Minecraft Diaries Episode 6 - My Thoughts and a General Summary

Oh, hot the time flies.... sigh. Already on Episode 6. Before you know it, we’ll be halfway through the season, and I’ll be crying because Leona is reintroduced and finally... other people will care. But I’m getting off topic. Let’s jump right into it, shall we?

So, our episode begins with a nice shot around everyone’s favorite Worst Brother of the Year, Zane!

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God, look at him. He’s such an asshole. I love him.

Now I know I can’t be alone in the group of old fans who saw this next scene and thought -

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“Who the fuck are you?”

His name is revealed to be Ivan, and I had no idea who this dude was. According to my Good Friends, all of whom are much better at remembering Everything Aphmau, Ivan is Lucinda’s ex. He was introduced sometime in Season 2, and then killed off subsequently after. If you don’t know who Lucinda is yet, because you’re new to Minecraft Diaries, just hold on a bit longer. And if you do know who she is because of MyStreet... well I prefer everything MCD to their MyStreet counterparts, so... good for you?

Back to the summary, Ivan has returned from scouting to inform Zane that they haven’t found anything relating to whatever he’s searching for, but that some scholars are supposedly hiding something. Zane decides that mayhaps a visit from the High Priest Himself is in Order. Which means shit it about to go down. If OG MCD taught me anything, its that when Zane LEAVES Oh’Kahsis, people die. Just look at Falcon Claw.

Back in ye old Phoenix Drop, a freshly bathed Aphmau is being escorted out of Donna’s house, and Donna tells Aphmau not to fret over what happened to Visher. She then admits that events like this are precisely why she hasn’t let anyone get close to her heart. Aphmau, having literally only come to consciousness only some days/weeks(?) prior, is confused to what Donna could mean. Before Donna can properly explain, aside from some cryptic message about protecting her heart, Dale (surprisingly more or less sober) runs up, informing the two that Brendon has been killed.

Spoiler, he’s not dead, just very badly wounded. Garroth and Zenix are freaking out over what to do, and Donna, Dale and Aphmau showing up cause even more chaos. Zenix runs downstairs to heat his sword so he can cauterize the wound, and Aphmau notices a bruise on Brendon’s foreheard. She does some of her good old Glowly Glow Magics and proceeds to pass out.

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This marks another time upon which Zenix was not present to see Aphmau perform her magics. The exact reason for this, I couldn’t say. Maybe if he see’s he’ll recognize her? Or maybe it’ll be more of a running gag? Again, I can’t say for sure.

Back downstairs, Kiki has arrived! The group questions Zenix as to what happened, as he was with Brendon. Zenix states that he and Brendon were working, when he heard a noise and saw Brendon has been shot. Looking around, he spotted a thief in green, and attempted to pursue, but then instead flagged down Dale. Which, to me, is a massive red flag, as Zenix is a hot headed idiot who has ALWAYS chased things down. But you know, everything all crazy.

So after more or less dismissing HOW everything went down, its explained that while Aph was able to help Brendon, whatever was on the arrow is still eating at his flesh, and he needs this special herb. However, Visher, who normally sells medicine, doesn’t have any in stock at the moment. But, the Lord of Bright Port does! Aphmau at this point as been listening to the conversation, and discovered that for whatever reason, her powers aren’t working. Visher makes it clear that he can leave to get the herbs, but will only leave in the morning when its safe. So what does Aph do?

She jumps out the window and steals Paul’s boat.

....

This is the most on brand thing she’s done, I swear.

We get a small taste of Gene and Sasha being all evil, Gene sayin he needs to go do something, and even dropping hints about Sasha’s past (oooOOOO).

So Aphmau sets sail (don’t even get me started on how she fuckin knows how to use a goddamned boat) and she makes it to -

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BRIGHT PORT!!!!

We’re movin on in the world y’all! It’s GREAT.

And now.

My favorite PART of the episode.

The One.

THE ONLY.

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*insert the sound of panties dropping*

Laurence....

Laurence sees Aph, decides he’s gonna go after that, and starts to work his charm. Some of the village girls get a bit upset, but aren’t too upset. He flusters her, then leaves to Meteli, to lie in wait.

Now, to some OG fans, you all might be questioning : Hey, why is Laurence here so early? Well you see there... dear viewers, Laurence WAS in Bright Port the first time Aphmau went to Bright Port.

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Nice little nod to the OG series there Jess.

BUT ANYWAYS.

We come upon some kid named John, who is pleading with some guards to help him free a baby werewolf. They refuse, and Aph steps in to help him out, in exchange for help.

AND SO WE MEET LOWEL.

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Look at him. He’s so tiny. He’s looks kinda weird. But she saves him and its v cute.

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Bromance.

And a weird lil hug. But that’s excusable.

This next boat scene ain’t.

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Dear. Lord.

I see why the boats were only seen in low light. This looks like... BAD. I get it. These peeps are on a tight schedule. They pop one episode out a week. BUT LIKE THIS BOAT LOOKS SO WEIRD. IDK MAN. ITS JUST WEIRDLY SMOOTH AND GROSS AND LOOKS LIKE PNG. BLEH.

This scene is basically just setting Gene up to whatever the fuck he’s gonna do. But i could care less cuz THE FUCKIN BOAT.

And that sums up the episode! What are y’alls thoughts? Feel free to add to the post, I’d love to talk to more Aphmau fans! And look forward to my drawing for this episode. See y’all next time ^-^

#aphmau #mcd #Minecraft Diaries #garroth #laurence #donna #kiki #brendon #gene #sasha #zane ro'meave

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fae-fucker · 5 years

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Review: Zenith

by Sasha Alsberg and Lindsay Cummings

MOST KNOW ANDROMA RACELLA AS THE BLOODY BARONESS, A POWERFUL MERCENARY WHOSE REIGN OF TERROR STRETCHES ACROSS THE MIRABEL GALAXY.

To those aboard her glass starship, Marauder, however, she’s just Andi, their friend and fearless leader. But when a routine mission goes awry, the Marauder’s all-girl crew is tested as they find themselves in a treacherous situation—and at the mercy of a sadistic bounty hunter from Andi’s past.

*THIS REVIEW CONTAINS SPOILERS*

The result of a D-list YA author and a Manic Pixie Booktuber smashing their brains together in some sort of badly-thought-out mind stew, Zenith has been built up to be Throne of Glass in space, going so far as to slap a quote from the Supreme Queen of Shitty YA Sarah J Maas herself.

But does it live up to the hype?

Short answer? Of course not.

Long answer? *inhales*

The Writing

I’ll start off with the book’s biggest flaw: The writing is outright atrocious.

It’s filled with childish expressions and desperate attempts at being edgy and “deep” while sounding like the ramblings of an emo teenager who definitely thinks they’ll be the next New York Times bestseller, except this is an actual New York Times bestseller, and we should all be very afraid because Sasha is indeed writing an Outlander ripoff and needs to be STOPPED.

The flashes of competency are few and far between. As a veteran of bad book reading, this was genuinely hard to get through due to the sheer stupidity of the prose. I’ve heard that Alsberg and Cummings wrote the book simultaniously and didn’t split up the process in any way, but while I don’t want to point fingers, I’ve read some of Cummings’ writing and it was, while not especially memorable, actually competent. What did you do to her, Sasha?

Descriptions and symbolism rely heavily on stuff like darkness and blood and cold hearts and tainted souls and death and spikes of fear or rage slashing through people. Almost every chapter ends and begins with a sentence that’s supposed to sound shocking or interesting, but since nearly every chapter does it, the novelty wears off after about chapter five.

Shinsay (Sasha+Lindsay) don’t seem to be sure about what sort of tone they’re going for, which will be apparent in the other sections of this review and is probably a flaw of them having no idea what the fuck they’re doing. One second, we get weird animal sidekicks and characters rolling their eyes at the wacky hijinks of some bumbling robot. The next, people are having traumatic flashbacks while contemplating life and death. It’s a mess.

Another weird thing about the tone in this book is the fact that characters are supposedly very mature and Have Had The Sex Many Times Indeed, yet the word sex is never actually mentioned. Dex and Andi like to think about how they used to bone good, but the narrative itself is too coy to actually use the damn word, so we’re forced to suffer these 20-somethings acting like 12-year-olds in their own damn heads.

It’s like they want to appeal to adults through all these innuendos, but don’t want to make it too explicit because kids have money too! Except it doesn’t work, and ends up being too childish for an adult reader, and too explicit for someone younger. Pro tip: If you can’t say/write the word sex, or feel that you can’t do it because it would be inappropriate, don’t fucking write about sex.

The book is also far longer than it should be. Characters think too much about things we already know, and overexplain things we could’ve figured out on our own. Looking back, most of the plot happened in the final ten-to-fifteen chapters. My favorite examples of how overstuffed this book is when there are entire chapters of characters doing nothing but think about stuff while going from one place to another.

There was a chapter in which Dex, Androma’s love interest, thinks about how Andi is definitely not completely evil, then he sees her kill a man in cold blood and realizes that she is indeed very evil, then she tells him that she remembers every person she kills all sadly, at which point he realizes that no, his first assumption was correct: Andi isn’t totally evil.

All while they moved a few feet out of a jail cell.

I wish I was kidding.

Shinsay also have a crippling and frankly amateurish reliance on flashbacks. Timelines quickly mix together and become hard to keep track of as characters think about their traumatic pasts over and over again, while also talking about said pasts in the present as well. Shinsay couldn’t just show us the effects of the past events in the present, no. They had to have characters dream about it, think about it, talk about it, and also show us said events, sometimes through lengthy flashbacks that are split up across multiple chapters.

Near the end, there were instances which were frankly astounding to me as a writer, in which the narrative literally took a pause and told us that hold on, time for a flashback, in the very text itself. Characters put their own present aside to think about things that happened years ago, just so the reader could get exposition about something they probably already have figured out, or something they already knew from previous chapters.

I also want to mention the multiple POVs, because of course this book has multiple POVs. Aside from the fact that half of them contribute nothing but angst (Lira, Klaren, Valen), some POV changes are outright confusing and have no real purpose.

There were multiple instances when a chapter would loudly announce ANDROMA or DEX at the beginning (also why does Andi get ANDROMA while Dex isn’t DEXTRO), and then 300 words later, we’d get a little scene change and suddenly we’re in someone else’s POV and remain in said POV for the rest of the chapter. Or we’d switch back and forth between Dex and Andi during fight scenes, each of them getting a couple hundred words at most before it was time for the other one to take over again.

It read like garbage and happened mostly during action scenes, but during the climax, each of those 300 word scenes became their own one-page chapters as we switched POVs back and forward, plus flashbacks as characters also managed to fall unconscious or remember something traumatic in the middle of getting their asses kicked.

*makes ‘I don’t know’ sound*

The Characters

Lira is probably the one who’s the least offensive writing-wise, but she also ends up being the most boring. She’s also blue. She’s Andi’s “Second”, but being the badass space pirate that she is, the moment Andi is out of the picture and the command falls to her, she folds like a house of cards and starts whining about how inexperienced she is and how she has no idea what to do and how Andi is usually always there to babysit her. She’s blue, by the way.

Lira’s “conflict” (which lasts for like 3 chapters) revolves around her aunt (who is basically the queen of her home planet) offering her a fancy new ship and the opportunity to work with her beloved twin brother. Also she’s blue. So Lira has to angst for like 5 hot seconds about her choice, which is so obvious I won’t even attempt to speculate about the outcome. She’s blue and also bald.

Lira is also supposedly the “wise” one of the group, but I’ve already mentioned how useless she actually is in a conflict. She’s blue and bald. She also loses her absolute cool and sometimes has SO MANY EMOTIONS that she LITERALLY PASSES OUT, because she’s one of the cool blue aliens that evolved to … do that, I guess.

Anyway, have I mentioned that she’s blue?

Dex is … I’ll give him that he’s at least not abusive like Sasha’s Boyfriend Goals Rhysand McFaepeen or that Outlander dude, but that’s a pathetically low bar and you all know it. He does force a kiss on Androma to goad her into causing a scene as a distraction, which is nasty, but that’s about it.

Other than that, I can’t really say much about Dex. I think he’s supposed to be the sexy roguish type, à la Han Solo, but he comes off as sleazy and pathetic. His version of seduction is throwing shitty pick-up lines and winking at people while making innuendos and bragging about how he definitely, definitely has boned a lot.

His “conflict” is about how he wants to regain his place as a Guardian, but mostly it’s about how he still has the hots for Andi and is sad that they can never be a thing again, sequel hook sequel hook.

Breck and Gilly are … there, sometimes. They’re comic relief and mostly treated as a single entity.

Gilly is supposed to be the quirky 13-year-old murderer and really channels all her Melanie Martinez into the persona, but a few chapters into the plot and she’s crying and freaking out at the smallest sign of conflict, so that’s fun.

Breck is big and strong. And likes dresses, which is … feminism, I guess. Uh. Yeah.

Nor is the only interesting and vaguely likable character, because she actually has a motivation and a goal. Most of the time spent in Nor’s POV is her floating around her palace and feeling sorry for herself and monologuing evilly about how she will destroy the stars and make the galaxy beg or whatever. When she’s not cuddling her boyfriend and telling him he’s the only one who understands her, that is. We’re not exactly sure why she wants to enslave people and take over the world aside from VENGEANCE, or what she’ll do once she’s done the enslaving part, but she actually works toward that goal, which is more than I can say for our “heroine”.

There is some gross ableism in how her metal hand is talked about in the book, however, which isn’t great considering how fucking technologically advanced this society is and there are cyborg people walking around.

There’s nothing really interesting or unique about Nor aside from her being the evil queen stereotype, but given that she actually Does Stuff and has a consistent personality, she easily becomes the best character in the book, not that that’s an achievment.

Klaren is Nor’s mother and exists only in flashbacks. She is dead in the present timeline. She’s … a “chosen one” with mind-control abilities, which she uses to rape General Cortas for ~*~ reasons~*~. Her motivations or goals are never explained aside from vague semi-prophicies and Important Proper Nouns being thrown all over the place. The only significant things she does in the book is murdering a bunch of people so she can fuck a guy, then letting herself get taken by General Cortas (with whom she’s at war) so that she can mind-control him into fucking her.

I uh. I’m not sure why she existed tbh. I don’t think anything would’ve changed if her chapters were removed.

Valen is Nor’s half-brother and VENGEANCE WILL BE HIS. He spends most of the book either angsting about how VENGEANCE WILL BE HIS, being a non-character, or being unconscious. Until at the very end, that is, where it’s revealed that Nor had to torture her poor sweet brother just so that his mind-control abilities would awaken, and now he’s actually evil and on Nor’s side and was only pretending to be Andi’s friend. (Which, btw, I dunno how she didn’t see through that, given that she thought he blamed her for his sister’s death and forgave her within like 3 minutes, but that’s the brilliant space pirate Androma Racella for you.)

Uuh. Yeah. We never really find out why he turned on his father or what his new motivations are or how exactly his mind-powers work, but he’s evil now, I guess, so there’s that. There’s an argument to be made that Valen turned on his father because he found out he murdered his mother, but I feel like Valen should be more conflicted and not instantly turn to the side of the woman who had him tortured for months, but I guess the plot needed him to be evil as a twist so logic be damned.

Andi … oh, Andi. Where to begin with this mess of a Celaena ripoff. She’s like a Sonic OC but inexplicably published in a real book you can buy with real human dollars. White and purple hair? Check. Sexy tight leather outfit? Check. Electric katanas swords strapped to her back like an X of death? Check. Sad backstory? Check. Killed her best friend by accident? Check. Has a super edgy pseudonym that everyone seems to know is her, which defeats the point of her having a pseudonym? Gosh golly, that’s another check!

Her, uh, well I couldn’t call it conflict given that she doesn’t do shit about trying to resolve it, is that she has “PTSD” over all the people she’s murdered and she’s very sad about it, until more people show up for her to kill. Then the narrative makes sure to remind us that THE BLOODY BARONESS is THE MOST BADASS MURDER-HOBO IN THE ENTIRE GALAXY.

She slips in and out of her Pee-Tee-Ess-Dee (which isn’t the same as PTSD, mind you) based on whether it’s Angst Time or not. When Shinsay want her to be a sad and sympathetic woobie, Andi feels all shitty about how much of a cold-blooded murderer she is. When she needs to be all Feminisms Girl Power Cool, then she’s suddenly slicing heads off shoulders and leaves a trail of corpses in her wake.

I will applaud Shinsay for not taking the copout route that SJM took with Aelin and having Androma only murder “bad” people, but the end result is clumsy as shit. Andi can’t both realize that everyone she kills are people with lives and families and futures one second, and take pleasure and pride in killing them so easily the next. It just doesn’t make any sense. For her to be an effective killer, she’d have to dehumanize everyone else, to save her own sanity. If she doesn’t see her victims as anything more than sacks of flesh in her way, she wouldn’t be able to dispose of them the way she does.

This is why her Pee-Tee-Ess-Dee is so transparent and bad, by the way. Aside from the dumbass “dances” she has with the dead, the fact that killing even more people doesn’t trigger flashbacks or cause any visceral reaction or affect her in any way that’s actually inconvenient, screams that this is just for show. The only thing we get are nightmares or Andi “dancing with the dead”, so her Pee-Tee-Ess-Dee doesn’t get in the way or affect the plot or her as a character at all. It’s just there to woobify her and make her seem deep and troubled.

Her supposed remorse is also greatly cheapened and feels extremely token when she gleefully murders even more people. If she feels so bad, why doesn’t she just … stop? And try to atone? Apparently a part of her feels that this is just who she is now, which is a cheap excuse that gets her away from any responsibility, and frankly doesn’t feel like something a person who’s truly remorseful would make.

Aside from … all of this, there really isn’t much to Andi at all. She’s your typical sexy Hollywood Strong Female Character, and the narrative keeps reminding us of how amazing and strong and competent she is. Her only character traits are that she supposedly cares very much about her crew, and that she kinda sorta feels bad for killing people except not really.

Also, I do wonder how exactly she’s managed to create a “reign of terror” in under 4 years of being a space pirate, doing nothing but smuggling jobs and accidentally dropping ships onto colonies. She’s also, like, what, 20 at most?

Whatever.

The “Plot”

Andi & Co are super cool space pirates, but they get captured easily within like the first few chapters, which makes them all freak out because they’re such experienced and hardened veterans of the sea of nothingness we call space and that’s just what they DO.

Then Andi’s ex, whom she tried to kill for reasons I’m sure aren’t a total misunderstanding that will provide angst for a will-they-won’t-they subplot later, shows up and says that Andi now has to work General Cortas. Andi knows this guy, as he is the father of the girl she was supposed to protect but ended up in a crash accident with that killed her, and now she has to save his son who has been missing for 2 years.

So uh …they do that. Pretty easily, I might add. Nothing goes wrong while Andi and Dex are away fetching Valen, but Lira freaks the fuck out anyway because she’s incompetent and also an idiot.

Then they go to Lira’s home planet and they chill there for a while, with Lira having a minor subplot about maybe leaving the crew, which she won’t. Andi finds out that Dex only betrayed her to save his … uuh, someone. I spaced out at this point because I was so bored, sorry. They’re very conflicted and sort of still horny for each other but “nothing can ever be the same” or whatever.

Then Nor (who has been angsting and being all threatening at no one in particular while this was happening, and also developing a drug called Zenith that brainwashes people into worshiping her, somehow) orders an attack on Lira’s home planet but the gang escape and get to Arcardius, their final destination.

But then General Cortas says that Andi and Dex’s job isn’t over as they need to uuuh … I can’t fucking remember this bit either, lads. Anyway, they stay long enough to attend a fancy ball (so Shinsay can get those sweet sweet fantasy/Throne of Glass vibes) where Valen takes Andi as his date for reasons. Then Valen turns out to have been on Nor’s side and also her half-brother this entire time and she tortured him on purpose, and he kills General Cortas and stabs Andi into unconsciousness.

Andi’s crew are all brainwashed (though the text doesn’t say anything about Breck, and I’m not sure they forgot or if they meant to foreshadow that she’s fine and faking it), and Dex manages to save Andi. The general transfers his status to Andi before he dies, making Andi the GENERAL OF … something something, I forget.

Why did I just spoil this plot for you? Cuz I need to prove some points.

The first one being that there just isn’t a lot of plot to cover the amount of book. Most of it happens at the start and at the end while the middle is just people farting about, thinking about how broken and troubled and deep they are and waiting for the narrative to come and make them do something. The one character who actually affects the plot directly is Nor, the main villain, and she’s so far removed from the actual action and isn’t even aware of the main crew at all, so it doesn’t feel personal when the consequences of her actions affect the characters we’re supposed to care about.

My next biggest problem is the fact that Andi, our main character and the one we’re supposed to root for and be invested in, doesn’t really have any goals or motivations? At first she wants to save Valen to get away from General Cortas. Which she does, so that’s done in like a dozen chapters. Then she sort of maybe wants to have her crimes pardoned and return to Arcardius? But then when she does, she hates the place and her parents are assholes towards her and she wants to go back to being a space pirate. Then she gets knocked out and isn’t even there for the rest of the ending.

What does Andi want? We know what she doesn’t want, because those things are all reactions to what’s hapening to her. As a result of this, Andi doesn’t act, she only reacts. She just does what she’s told or what she’s forced to, gets dragged along while the plot sort of moves without her affecting it or changing its course. Lira is very much the same, but at least she gets to kinda sorta contemplate a motivation? Except she gets brainwashed at the end so there’s that.

Will the second book finally give Andi a reason to do anything? Will she finally affect her own damn plot? Who knows?

Perhaps more importantly: Who cares?

And finally I will note that the plot feels a bit … improvised. Like Shinsay weren’t 100% sure where they were going and sort of figured it out at the very end when they realized they needed a Tweest.

Maybe I’m wrong, of course, but the foreshadowing starts happening like maybe halfway through the book, maybe even later, and then it’s quickly recapped for us at the very end in case we were complete dumbasses (which I guess we are for reading this book). Looking back, there are some strange but obvious inconsistencies with how the plot started and how it ended. But I won’t go into that at this point, because this review is long enough.

The “Worldbuilding”

There’s a post going around on Tumblr about how one should include tidbits of worldbuilding by having characters mention small things within the world that are never quite explained. I thought this was a reasonable idea until Zenith happened.

You see, between the alien species and the oily fuck-slugs, nothing’s ever explained. Strange new words and new types of aliens are thrown around like slurs at a frat party, but we never find out what anything … is.

The book might compare something to a random made up word that’s apparently some sort of alien dinosaur, but the reader has no idea what that dinosaur is until that very sentence, so the comparison means nothing. On some level Shinsay must’ve realized this, because they often follow up this introduction of this new thing with a quick explanation of what it is.

They can waste entire chapters on characters gazing deep into their navels, but they can’t include some alien dinosaurs early on so the reader actually has an idea of what they are and why the comparison is accurate?

For example: Lira likes a thing called Moon Chew, which everyone says is bad for her, but we never find out why, or what it is, or why she’s using it. At points the text implies she’s addicted to it, but that’s dropped like a hot potato about a third into the book? Then there’s Griss, which is apparently some sort of booze, which every other edgy character brags about drinking because that’s the level of maturity here, but again, we never find out what the fuck Griss is.

Then we have the alien species. We know that Lira and Breck are Funky Aliens, and Dex bleeds green for reasons, but Andi and Gilly and anyone else from Arcardius? We never find out what their shit is all about. They don’t seem to have any sort of powers or abilities outside of being just regular old humans, but Arcardius is not earth, and the word “human” is used once in the book and it’s just some random unnamed guy that Andi murders. But by failing to explain what species Andi and all the other Arcardians are, the reader sort of automatically assumes they’re human. Which, considering that Gilly and Andi are the only white girls on the crew … The Implications Are Troublesome.

As for Dex … he bleeds green and is from another planet, but seems to have compatible bits with Andi and just looks like a regular old dude (but has brown skin, which, again, hmmm), so who the fuck knows.

Then at the end, we find out that Lon, Lira’s twin brother, is a “universal donor” and can give blood to Andi, despite them being different species.

I … I don’t know.

Aside from the weird alien stuff, there’s nothing particularly original about Zenith’s worldbuilding. It’s like Shinsay watched one whole episode of Star Trek and maybe 15 minutes of The Force Awakens and maybe fell asleep to a playthrough of Mass Effect: Andromeda, and then scraped the first layer of sci-fi off all those things and sort of spread the powder across a generic fantasy story about kings and queens and not-magic-but-definitely-magic-but-we-pretend-it’s-science.

Every major planet has one culture and one ruler, which is a fairly common dumb thing in mainstream sci-fi but that doesn’t excuse anything. Despite not being royalty per se, the line of succession seems to be herediraty in some cases.

The technology is basic uninspired space stuff, with the addition of SUPER HARDCORE GLASS SHIPS that are UNBREAKABLE but still need shields for some reason? Glass is cool because Daddy Sarah did it first!

Also, Andi’s badass space pirate crew are 4 people. Two ‘gunners’, one pilot, and one captain who just kinda sits there. How they all keep the space ship going is a mystery to me. Gilly at one point is offended by the suggestion of their ship having a mechanic or an engineer.

*shrugs*

The “science” is nonexistent here, by the way. I’m all about sci-fi lite and including funky space stuff without trying to scientifically explain everything always, but this was outright pathetic. There is a character named Soyina who can bring people back to life within minutes of death, and when Andi asks how the fuck she does that, we get this:

Soyina chuckled arrogantly, clearly relishing Andi’s ignorance. “With science, dear girl!”

That’s it. Shinsay are so lazy that they can’t even be bothered to pull a sciency-sounding explanation out of their asses, but still have the character laugh at Andi, and by extension the reader since the reader also wants to know this, for assuming that it’s anything other than HARD SCIENCE.

Like … You could’ve said it’s isolated time and space warping. Rapid regeneration through the application of universal stem cells. Space cucumber juice with nanobots knitting the tissue together. I came up with three just now for a book review, and you couldn’t come up with ONE for your EPIC SPACE OPERA THAT’S 98 CHAPTERS LONG?

Instead, you laugh at the reader for asking the question but then don’t bother giving them even a sliver of an answer?

K.

The Feminisms???

The whitest Hollywood feminism you’ve seen. It basically amounts to putting the word “women” ahead of “men” when talking about big masses of people and Dex getting amazed at how badass the ALL-FEMALE crew is because it’s such a surprise to see WOMEN doing STUFF!

I will give Zenith some credit in that there are plenty of female characters, and some of them even affect the plot! Not Andi, though. She mostly gets dragged along by the men into doing stuff.

Nor is technically doing stuff, but she just sort of sits around all evilly and cuddles her boyfriend while thinking about how she’s gonna make the stars bleed or whatever.

As for any other type of diversity?

Uh. Dex and Breck are both brown aliens? Nor has a prosthetic hand, which she’s disgusted by for some reason? Um. Andi has Pee Tee Ess Dee, I guess?

The Quotes

Yes, these are real. Yes, they were written by two entire grown women. Yes, this is indeed a New York Times bestseller, not that it means anything at this point.

I Don’t think Lira Knows What Sarcasm Is

“Hope is a raging asshole,” Gilly said.

“Explain to me, Gilly,” Breck said with a sigh, “how exactly can an asshole rage?”

Lira chocked on a sudden, unexpected laugh. “I swear, the two of you. You were both born with my brother’s sarcastic soul.”

Andi Gets Hot and Bothered, Featuring Corpses

“Dex.” She said his name like a sigh, hating the way it felt so familiar on her tongue.

They were too close together. Too alone, despite the corpses and Valen’s unconscious form beside them.

The Concept of Bastards Exists In This Space Opera and It’s Worse than Being a Prick, Apparently

The little fire-haired gunner had wanted to know if the blood on Andi belonged to her or some “now-ball-less bastard,” to which the giantess had responded, Of course it’s not hers Gil. And don’t say bastard. Say prick.

Presented Without Comment

Androma Racella, the Bloody Baroness of Mirabel, stared out the back of the wagon as her ship slid over another pile of fresh green dung and allowed herself to pout like a child.

Me Reading This Book

A constant tick in the back of her mind that whispered, Death, death, death.

Presented Without Comment 2: Electric Boogaloo

Valen, upon waking, had looked at her like he knew her soul was black. Andi supposed it was. A soul that had taken so many lives must be tainted.

You’re Really Not Equipped To Write About This, Shinsay

“Valen will wake up again. When he sees me…if he tries to kill me…” Andi paused, swallowing hard. “I’m afraid I won’t try to stop him.”

With Her What Now

In truth, all he cared about was catching a glimpse of Andi in the crowd.

Andi, with her “stab you in the balls and laugh as you scream” eyes.

As Opposed To …?

Andi snarled with all of her teeth.

God Forbid People Flirt

Later, Andi knew, [the soldiers would] walk up to the the girls, try to win them over with their smooth words. Hopefully, if the girls were smart, they’d shut the boys down.

And Then Valen Stabbed Her

When she stood, somehow hauling herself up on shaky feet, Dex knew that Valen would die. Because it was not Andi who rose, but someone else in her place. The Bloody Baroness.

The Conclusion

Zenith is a delightfully, deliciously bad book and proof that the pubishing industry is bullshit and that being a good reader does not necessarily mean you’re a good writer (and Sasha isn’t even a particularly good reader). All you need to be successful is having an army of squealing teenage fans and kissing popular-author-ass.

It has little to no plot, no purpose, nothing new to say, no new concepts, no interesting characters, nothing of worth in general aside from maybe providing a twisted sort of entertainment for the masochists among you.

You should absolutely read this book but under no circumstances should you give Shinsay any of your hard-earned money, because this book represents everything wrong about publishing today and we need to prove that we’re not sheep.

Thank you for reading.

#book review #repost #zenith

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soul-music-is-life · 5 years

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I'm kind of with you on the lackluster Pilot episode of "The Perfectionists". I don't know whether or not I'm into it either. And not because of Emison (I'm more of an Emaya fan myself). I just thought it was cheesy and boring. I don't know if I should keep watching. What about you?

I have actually gotten several asks about whether I plan tokeep watching and why/why not. So I’m going to answer it here and just referback to it if it keeps coming up.

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I don’t mind the asks at all. I love conversing, but because of the volume of asks about thisparticular opinion this is another long driveling post, and I’m sorry. You can mute my ass if you’re sick of me. I get it.

First of all OP, thank you for not ripping into me about notliking it. Also, Emaya had my heart. I loved them, too. Maya deserved better.

Second, this is a full-scale look at the show from a critic’svantage point. I watched the first episode twice because I thought maybe I hadn’tgiven it a fair shake the first time because I was in a weird mood. But even onthe second viewing I found a lot more that I disliked than I liked. Lots ofpeople are going to disagree, and that’s fine. Just don’t @ me. I’m legit notlooking for that. I’m just a girl (cue NottingHill music) standing in front her ask inbox asking those askers to love her.

Will I keep watching? I doubt it. Given that it only got a10-episode order and The Pilot wasn’t that interesting to me, I don’t see myselfsitting through it for 9 more episodes. My reasoning is two-tiered. Part of itis disinterest and the other part is the creative aspect of it in the media. Saddleup for my “truths” (I can’t remember who said that. Marlene maybe). I gave it afew days and considered it, and what I ended up with was this:

1) I’m just not into it. For the same reasons you (OP) stated.But I’ll also add that for me…it was predictable. I called the twists longbefore they happened. If I’m already doing that in The Pilot I can guarantee I’dbe doing that as the show went on. I’m like 93% sure I know exactly how it’sgoing to end this season. I tend to do that to myself. Being a writer suckssometimes. Because you see the way things are going to go from the beginning. You just have to decide if you want to go on the journey anyway.

2) While the characters were likable (I was surprised by howmuch I liked Ava), they are a bit one-sided and kind of bland (except I foundNolan’s duality extremely intriguing). There is the argument that can be madehere that they will grow, and I do agree with that. But when I watch a show’sPilot I need to care about at least one character to see what’s going to happenand where they are going to go (In PLL it was Em/Aria for me). None of the characters in TP did that for me (noteven Mona and Alison, which surprised me, because I’ve been super-hype for thisshow not only for them, but for the newbies, too).

3) The plot (so far) just feels like a rehash of everysingle YA mystery novel/TV show that is hot right now. And I am aware that thisis based loosely on exactly that (Sara’s series), but I think maybe I’ve justbecome desensitized to the same cheesy soap-opera-y murder mystery plots. Or perhaps I’m just desensitized to this particular kind of storytelling. It doesn’tfeel new and different to me and it was very strangely paced with too muchgoing on and not enough time to care about it. It just felt disjointed. Everythingabout the first episode just fell flat for me.

4) And lastly, yes, I’d say there is a tiny part of me…likemaybe…6% that doesn’t want to watch because I’m not about that off-screenEmison drama. I knew it was going to happen and I’m not mad about them beingsplit. I’m disappointed (hears “that’sjust ‘mom speak’ for mad!” echoing somewhere) that the marketing team isusing it for ratings. When you have decent writing you don’t need to play games like that to try andget viewers. It would be one thing to be decisive about what happened toEmily/Alison (Split them. Don’t split them. I don’t care. Just make a fuckingdecision because you’re creating a war between fans and you know it). It’sanother thing entirely to draw it out because you need people to watch and talkabout it.

I am also particularly bothered by hearing the excuse (several times by MK) that “Shay was busy”because Marlene literally planned the spin-off in season 6 (confirmed by bothher and Sasha). It. Was. Planned. I say this as a critic and not an Emison fan: Everything about the way they’ve tried to use Emison to generate buzz was underhanded. And saying shit like that opens the door for people to hate on Shay, and that’s really not cool.

Personally, I think it speaks volumes that the producers felt the need to addthe off-screen drama on top of the really decent plot they already had. Theycould have kept it unproblematic with simple writing choices and less inflammatorycommentary. They could have left the PLL drama in the PLL-verse and given thespotlight to the new drama. I don’tagree with creating old off-screen drama with zero chance of satisfactoryresolution all in the name of ratings. I hate marketing shit like that. It’s acheap amateur tactic and it turns me off.

I think the show could have been something special had theynot marketed it as PLL. But they did, so of course there was a certainexpectation. And of course there is some backlash. Because there are these twoworlds that have nothing to do with each other and so far I don’t feel likethey’ve blended it together well. For me, it was like watching PLL, but with less magic and less chemistry. If I had to describe it I’d say it feels alot like a recipe where you’re just throwing a bunch of ingredients into a bowlwith no idea what you’re making and you’re just hoping it’ll be edible by theend. Rather than focusing on the new universe the marketing team chose to focuson Ali/Mona’s new world and the drama that comes with them. And to me that almost says they don’t have faith that TPwould have been able to stand on its own without the PLL universe. Part of methinks I’d be more interested if this had been a completely fresh start. I wasactually more compelled by the newbies than I was Alison/Mona (though I adorethem, too).

That being said, I really wish the best for the cast/crew. I’llcontinue to watch the behind the scenes games/cast antics. I’ve been a fan ofSasha since I discovered PLL (everything about her seems very sweet and genuine andjust positive all around). And Janel as Mona was one of my favorite castingchoices of all time. In fact, I think my very first PLL post here was praisefor Janel. I’ve been following Sydney since she was a smol lil bean on theDisney Channel (and loved her in Tia’s Mowry’s show “Instant Mom”). Sofia seemslike a sweet girl, and I have enjoyed her other work. And Eli honestly justseems like he’d be a cool dude to kick back and have a drink with (is he evenold enough to drink? Jesus, they’re all babies). I love them all. In fact, I’veenjoyed the fun behind the scenes stuff more than I enjoyed the show. I’dwatch a reality show of them all day. That’s where I’ll get my fill. Watching them being goofy.

Final verdict: No, the show will not be getting my views. I’llprobably just watch the absurdity of Riverdale instead. Cheryl is fucking wild,y’all. And I’m kind of living for mean-dark-snarky Betty. And Sweet Pea is like…myfavorite character ever. My dumb asshole child.

As far as whether or not youshould watch it, I have no idea. I have a lot of people asking me my opinion onthat (which, I’m like the worstperson to ask, please don’t give me that responsibility. I don’t even likebeing responsible in the real world. I literally had a cookie and Cocoa Puffsfor dinner). I will say that if you’re only watching for Emison then I’d changethe channel. Because guaranteed it’s just going to make you rage. You’re not going to get anything out of it. Fill yourevenings with something more pleasant and positive for you.

And be nice to others on social media. At the end of the day, it’s only a show. You like it or you don’t.

#The Perfectionists #PLL #Pretty Little Liars #Emison asks

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