Bachlelors’ Rizz-abilites?
inspired by this post. lowkey biased tbh
Alex thinks he has rizz but doesn’t actually so it becomes a sort of pathetic but endearing rizz? Does that make sense? But only cause he’s attractive though or else people would just think it’s pathetic😭🤚🏻
Sam and Harvey have no rizz but they’re so okay with that and being themselves that it becomes their rizz and its kinda my favorite type. My loveable men!!
Sebastian lowkey has rizz tbh I think he can be quite charming in a mysterious but also dorky kinda way. When he wants to. He rarely wants to, though
Elliot has rizz rizz bitch like he’ll actually steal your girl, your man and your own heart too. Howl from Howl’s moving castle type rizz. Unmatched
Shane has no rizz at all, actually. Definition of negative rizz. Not even pathetic loser man rizz can save this one ya’ll I’m sorry😭
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Stardew Valley Bachelors x Male Reader
Relationship Headcanons
Harvey
Super Shy Gay(TM)
I dont CARE if you're married he ASKS TO HOLD YOUR HAND
Kiss him. Kiss him in public. Do it.
If you call him gay he'll get flustered
Can't cook for shit but tries his best. yes, the smoke alarms are going off because he tried to cook bacon.
Harvey is one of those anxious boyfriends that asks you to text him that you made it to a place safe.
"Drive safe, I love you"/"Dear it's been 10 minutes since the ETA are you alright?" hella ass
probably forgets your anniversary ONCE, but then never again when you tell him you were upset.
Elliot
you know the men that forget your anniversary? NOT ANYMORE
you randomly come home to roses all the time.
"Oh hello my love i am writing a book about homosexual pirates wear this to immerse me please"
probably hides gifts around the house with little notes
bad at confrontation but will eventually talk to you about things that bother him like a week of letting it fester.
"BABY CAN WE PLEASE GO TO THE RENAISSANCE FAIR"
Dramatic ass bitch on GOD
probably likes to be choked
Shane
Calls you gay slurs affectionately and expects the same energy back at him.
He can cook like, 2 meal.
Remembers every little anniversary but is embarrassed about it. He remembers the first time you kissed, the first time you said i love you, etc.
Biggest cuddlebug known to man
Feels bad that you're the main breadwinner so he begs to take care of the chickens on your farm.
You WILL find Shane asleep with a baby chick in his arms sometimes i'm sorry homie
Confrontational af, if something happens that he isn't okay with he'll bring it up as soon as situationally possible in a kind way.
Sam
writes you love songs
he's a bit of a messy partner, but if you mention the mess it'll be spotless for like, 3 weeks.
if you get in a fight he'll brood outside with his guitar for a little, but will always get into bed with you at the end of the day happily.
loves surprises and surprising
he's all great when it's casual flirting, but as soon as you two start seriously flirting he gets all flustered.
bi-curious, you're probably the first man he's dated but not the first man he's kissed.
loves to binge TV shows with you
Sebastian
pan ICON
he thinks you're too cool for him, but he is grateful that you enthusiastically love him
calls you a hillbilly if you call him emo
if you ask about a project he's working on he WILL talk for hours
Falls asleep at his desk a lot, but appreciates when you carry him to bed
he loves when you talk to him "while he's sleeping"
Lets you ride with him to TechCons or Comicons, loves going as couple characters
you get invited to the Dungeons and Dragons campaign
likes calling you his boyfriend
Alex
picks you up and does reps with you to flirt
he loves touching your body after a long day of farming, the tan fascinates him.
a surprisingly great cook, always knows what you wanna eat without asking.
has never even looked at a man before you came along, so he's kinda awkward about serious romantic things
bad at confrontation, but great at supporting you
he calls you very masculine things like "superman" or "my man" a lot
Defends Dusty when he steals your spot on the bed, but offers his chest as a substitute.
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